Just found this fic and read all 10 chapters and i loved every second of it, great job!

I don't know if you still read reviews but this was a beautiful story. I enjoyed every chapter.

beautiful. simply beautiful. ive read this before but the second time around- even better.

I read this story a long time ago and stopped in the middle because I couldn't get over how Spike just went back to Dru (when they were teens)... and I just came across it again today and decided to read the entire thing and felt completely stupid because if I hadn't stopped reading, I would have found out WHY he went back to Dru and would have enjoyed this great, amazing fic immensely, which probably would have improved my life by 20%.

So... yeah. I love this! I love how you fluctuate from the past to the present, ... and your way with words is beautiful.

Part 9... I think that is the part where it gets worse before it gets better *reads on* Mmmm Buffy is Spike's dirty little secret.. I wonder why Buffy didn't say something to Spike about his behavior. And then he comes less around and then he vanishes? That's not normal. Oh yeah, that is the bad chapter. Spike is back with Dru. How could he do this to Buffy? (Did he thought she wouldn't notice?) Maybe... It's heartbreaking. I see, he did it because he believed Dru that she stopped the drugs and would start again if he wouldn't take her back. All to make her (Dru) see that he didn't belong to her any longer? Bad plan that backfired terribly. He did hurt Buffy very deep. ~ Wow.. Spike told Buffy now he loved her (and had always loved her). And again.. after Buffy told him that she has to go back to work but is not leaving Spike thinks she'll leave him. Oh my... ~ Buffy is stronger than him. *sigh* And I think she always was stronger. Back then too when he hurt her so much.

Author's Response: Thank you, cordy. I know this chapter is the toughest to read, but I promise, stick to the end and it will be okay. :) And yes, Buffy is the strong one in this story- but Spike is about to find what he needs. Thank you for all the lovely comments you left me, hon. I have been away from here for too long! ::hugs::

Oh my.. Spike and Dru? That is really an unhealthy relationship. She so drug addicted; Spike can be glad he isn't addicted to the drugs Dru always seems to have. For him? It was better to let her go... And Buffy *sigh* Now the cat is out of the sack and her dad is leaving. But yeah, that's right: Buffy doesn't have to keep his secrets any longer. Yeah.. and Spike was looking for some comfort from Buffy because of Dru.. but it wouldn't have been fair to Buffy. ~ ~ ~ How bittersweet... after Buffy left there wasn't anybody else for her.. or for him. Well if Spike wouldn't have gone back to Dru Buffy wouldn't have gone... that's true. 15 Years.. that is a long time. I'm glad though Buffy came back :)

Poor Buffy *sigh* She definitely has a very big crush on William. But he isn't around her that much he used to be. All grown up too. ~ Back today: They way Buffy acts you can see she still have feelings for William. Well, maybe an outsider or her mum. I'm not sure Spike can see it. I wonder why she thinks it's her fault. *reads on*

Mel has the next two chapters so here I am again :) Chapter 3: Hehe that's sweet: Buffy asking if she has to love Spike now, too ;-) Awe.. what happened to Spike that made him cry? Loved caring Buffy bringing him cookies. The rest of the chapter is sad; but isn't it always? Funerals and miss someone so deep for so long.

I have to hurry! Mel has the first chapter ready (translation) :)... It's so sad that it took Spike's mum dying to bring Buffy home. After 14 years? That's a long time. Sad 14 years for Buffy in a way. They were in the same class then... and Spike was with Dru. No wonder Buffy hates her ;-)

i decided to read this fic after seeing Ashlee's review and am i glad i did. It was very good. I hope you write some more ,

Author's Response: Thank you, Jo! I am 2 chapters away from finishing another AU spuffy fic. I will put it here when it is done. :D

I read this on your LJ a month or two ago and absolutely loved it! I realized that I forgot to review there, but I wanted to tell you that I thought it was incredibly realistic and the emotions for both characters was amazing. You definitely have a gift with words :-) Great job!

Author's Response: Thank you so much, Ashlee! You made my day with that review! :D

Awesome. Laughed, got a little choked up. Felt the horror and freaking outness of the first time. Great job.

Author's Response: Thanks so much, LadyRia! I love hearing the ways my fic touches people. :)