Prologue

The young woman stepped out onto the balcony. She was petite, but there was power and strength underlying in her movements. She seemed almost regal standing in the approaching night in a colored evening gown that matched the fading light of the sky. Her pale gold skin and honey blonde hair contrasted warmly with her shimmering gown.

The beaded flowers on the skirt of her dress caught the lights from inside and sparkled as she walked forward to the railing. Absently setting down a glass of wine on the table beside her, she closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, enjoying the feeling of the warm night air.

As the last lingering light left the sky, she could almost feel the summer stars above her beginning to blink on. She grasped the balcony tightly as if to anchor herself, she threw back her head, closed her eyes and a smile came to her face as she let the night wash over her.

The night brought with it the thoughts of him.

She let the memories come, filling up the empty hole inside of her. She remembered the emotions he evoked in her, the coolness of his touch, the way his voice sounded whispering words of love in her ear, the smell of leather and tobacco that seemed to permeate his skin, the taste of his lips against hers, the depth of feelings dancing in his eyes.

She remembered HIM.

There was no grave to mark his passing and no one, not even the ones who were there really understood the sacrifice he made for them.

She tried not to let her regrets color the time she spent out here remembering him. He didn't deserve her regrets, he deserved remembrance and honor.

She opened her eyes and stared at the stars, not even aware of the tear that ran down her cheek. She searched the night sky for any sign that he was Ok, that he knew how much she missed him, how much she loved him.

The sound of an owl deep in the forest was her only response.

Her eyes closed again in pain for a moment and a small whimper escaped from her throat before she could stop it. Resolving herself she opened her eyes and continued what she had come out here to do.

She said the same prayer she said every night, for him to be at peace and happy.

She had done this every night since Sunnydale was destroyed. Some nights she would sit outside for hours and talk to him, other nights she would just take a minute, but she never forgot.

He had done the same for her when she was gone.

However, she had come back...

"147 days yesterday, 148 days today. Except today doesn't count does it?" Piercing blue eyes staring at her with wonder...

She shook her head to dispel the apparition before her. Her hands were clasped tightly together in front of her, remembering the last time she had touched him. She could still feel a tingling in her hand that had remained since the cavern. It was a constant reminder of the part of herself that she was missing.

"Right then, let's go be heroes." Sounding so resigned, and defeated.

She had thought there would be time later. She never thought she would lose him, her steadfast dark knight.

But there wasn't a later.

He was gone and he wasn't coming back.

As her body started to shake with grief and pain she bowed her head trying to fight the sobs that threatened to overwhelm her. Across the night her voice came, no more than a whisper, sad and lost.

"Spike"




Chapter 1 Surprise

It was little over a year since Buffy had stood at the edge of what used to be Sunnydale and watched the sign fall into the pit wondering if that was a little bit of Spike sending her on her way. Then she turned and saw the other's looking to her for what would come next, when it hit her full force:

SHE WAS FREE!!!

She could do anything now; go to college, get a real job, go to the beach or the mall; she could enjoy the daylight hours. Finally, she could have the normal life she always dreamed about.

She quickly realized as she surveyed her friends the first thing they needed was some serious down time. Everyone needed to heal and recover from the ordeal they had just survived and she personally needed time to grieve.

She had moved her wounded army to Los Angeles, to Angel.

It seemed through some turn of events that no one could properly explain, Angel, now was in charge of the a multi-million dollar law firm, that was part of a huge evil empire. Giles was extremely reluctant to accept help from anyone connected with Wolfram & Hart, but with the Watcher's Council destroy and what few Watchers that remained scattered about the world in hiding Angel was their best hope at receiving aid.

After a week of recovering the original Scoobies and Faith had dinner with the original gang from Angel Investigation to compare notes and Apocalypse stories. During the dinner, after a few too many glasses of wine Willow had come up with the idea of School for Slayers/Reformed Watcher's Council.

Buffy had laughed and told her she had seen Harry Potter one too many times, then she noticed that she was the only one laughing.

Turned out not everyone was as eager for a normal life as she was. No one else even considered it an option, really. Even the gang from Los Angeles wanted to be involved and offered their support.

So the second week after the destruction of Sunnydale everyone was focused on finding a new home for their school.

So much for Rest and Relaxation.

Eventually, through some old contacts of Wesley's family, they located an old run down Wiccan Retreat on a large piece of land in Northern California. The last of the Coven who owned it had died a few years before, leaving the property to fall into neglect.

The property was located not far from the protected redwood forests and had a huge mansion on it with several dozen small cabins spread out around the 400-acre property.

Willow, Wesley, Dawn and Giles had gone up first to look the place over.

When they got back, Willow and Dawn were ecstatic about what they had found.


"Its perfect for us." Willow had told the others excitedly.

"The can be renovated and turned into dorms for the Slayers." Dawn chimed in, just as excited.

"And the house is so huge we can use it live in and turn the extra rooms into classrooms." Willow told everyone.

"Oh my god the house is just AMAZING!!" Dawn interjected. "It almost feels likes its alive or something. Well not really alive, but you can tell its all magical and stuff."

"So the house is magic?" Buffy asked her doubtfully.

"Uh, we don't have too much luck with magic houses guys." Xander spoke up for the first time.

"Scared, Xan-Man?" Faith teased him. "I thought you were the Might Zeppo."

"Not scared. Just pointing out we don't have too much luck with houses of the haunted variety." Xander replied indignantly, while puffing himself up to show his manliness.

"I seem to remember Buffy getting really lucky in a magic house." Willow answered with a sly smile, reminding them of the time Buffy and Riley went into heat in a Frat house thanks to some evil poltergeists.

"Huh?" Dawn asked, lost in the conversation.

"She's talking about the time I defeated that house easily, Dawnie." Buffy answered Dawn, all the while glaring at Willow. Willow tried to look sheepish, but failed miserably so she just looked down to hide her smile.

"Yeah, I'll buy that." Faith said rolling her eyes at Dawn.

"Excuse me." Xander got everyone's attention again. "Still wanting to know about the magic house here."

"Its not really the house and its not really magic." Willow was getting exasperated trying to explain it to them. "Its just natural energy, a by product of all the old trees in the area. The house was built to harness that energy, it gives some natural barriers which actually serve to protect those who live in it."

"So the house is actually like a big guard dog?" Faith asked.

"No." Willow snapped finally losing her patience with them. "Look you guys you just have to come and see for yourselves."


So the Scoobies made the long trip up to see the property.

They found that Willow and Dawn had been right. The main house was amazing. There were 2 large fully functioning kitchens, a large formal dining room, a library, an indoor pool, a billiards room, numerous parlors, dens and living rooms. There were also about 30 bedrooms, 25 suites, and at least 10 bathrooms, that weren't attached to the suites.

Buffy could feel the energy in the house as soon as they drove up the driveway. She understood what Dawn had meant when she said it seemed almost alive, but she didn't feel threatened by it in the least, in fact it felt comforting to her.

Buffy had gone off by herself to explore, only slightly worried about finding her way back to the others in the maze of hallways and rooms she meandered through, when something seemed to pull at her. She followed the phantom urging up some stairs in the back to the top floor. At the very top of the stairs she found a large heavy wooden door in front of her, to her right was a door next to a large picture window looking out into the forest. To Buffy's left was a small hallway leading to another stairway going back down.

She opened the door to her right and walked out onto black wrought iron balcony. There were flowering vines growing all around the tendrils of iron. The smell of summer blossoms hung heavy in the air. She was eye level with the canopy of the forest and she could see squirrels playing in the boughs of the trees. Butterflies danced through the air, drinking from the sweet blooms on the vines. She walked along the balcony until she came to another door set of French doors. She opened them, walked inside and knew immediately she had found a home.

She had gone back downstairs, not even getting lost once in her search for Giles and the others.

When she found them in the library she simply looked at them and said, "We're taking it."

All of them had been amazed, but no one argued with her, they all felt the same way.


As nice as the house had been there had still been a lot of work to do. The cabins need major restoration if they were going to be used as dorms. They also built a large Training Facility, with the latest in gym equipment.

Money had not been an issue for them.

Giles had managed to stage a small coup among the surviving Council members. Not a difficult feat considering he was the only one in contact with the newly awakened and the veteran Slayers. Since he now had complete control of the Council he also had complete control over there considerable assets.

As the summer went on, the school had slowly begun to take shape. Xander had been in charge of the construction and repairs on the property. His work crew consisted of newly awakened Slayers. He swore their ability to lift heavy objects and get the whole lack of stupid male testosterone forever ruined him from working with another human work crew.


Obnoxious laughter managed to float up the five flights of stairs and out onto Buffy's balcony, interrupting her reverie. She frowned at the sound.

Only one person had a laugh that could carry like that.

Kennedy.


Buffy kept trying, for Willow's sake, to like the opinionated young girl, but most of the time she just wanted to gag her and stick her in a closet some where.

Thankfully, Kennedy and Rhona had gone to Cleveland not long after they moved into the house. Giles had found a Watcher he trusted to watch over the two young girls as they took up their position of watching the last active Hellmouth in the Continental US.

Willow had been depressed at first, but didn't really have too much free time to dwell on her separation with her girlfriend. She practically set up the entire computer system; from the computer in the classrooms used as teaching aids, to the clerical computers in the office, to the computers in the library that were networked directly into the Wolfram and Hart data base and library. She also spent many hours each day involved in deep meditation learning to control and utilize her powers.

Even with all of Willow's projects, Buffy managed to get in some quality Willow time at least a few times a week. They would go out shopping, to the movies, or sometimes just sit and get a cup of coffee, usually Xander would accompany them. The three were best friends again; all the wounds from the past were left there. No one ever brought up the night they turned their back on Buffy, not wanting to relive that memory.


Buffy could hear Faith downstairs ushering Kennedy and her noise into the ballroom. Faith and Buffy had become close over the past year. Buffy had helped Faith understand her responsibilities as a Slayer, while Faith had helped Buffy come to terms with the darker side of her Slayer nature. Training together had given them an edge to their fighting skills previously unheard of for a Slayer. Buffy had stepped aside early on in the school's creation and let Faith take over the role of lead Slayer. Faith had really come into her own since her unofficial appointment, gone was the doubt and self-hatred, in its place was a confident leader who understood what it meant to be a Slayer.

Everyone had their place in the new school.

Everyone except Buffy.

As much as she loved her friends and their new home, she didn't want to stay here.

She had tried the normal life, but it hadn't worked out quite the way she thought it would. Turned out "normal" wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

When her normal life didn't work out, Buffy had returned to the school. The young Slayers that now populated the school had made her extremely uncomfortable, looking up at her with stars in their eyes. For a while they would seek her out to hear the tales of her 'adventures' until she would either hide in her room or out in the miles of trees surrounding the house. It was there, wandering through the woods on the property she had found a peace she hadn't known before. Truths that she once feared seemed much less frightening under the sunlit canopy of leaves. She found comfort and strength in the sounds and smell of the Old Forest.

She knew she was a different person than she had been seven years ago and she was finally able to look back and actually see where she had come from and what she had become. She had come to terms with the fact that her power was rooted in darkness, that she was no better than the creatures she was created to Slay. It was up to her to control that darkness and use it to help her in her fight.

She also understood now that there really were no absolutes. No absolute good or absolute evil, it really was all about the balance.


Buffy thought about traveling the world a lot. I mean she had saved it countless times. Now she wanted to see what all she had saved.

She just wasn't sure how to do that.

The world was a pretty big place for her to go exploring all by herself. Not that she was scared...more like intimated.


Again the voices from downstairs raised in volume, carrying out onto her balcony as more guests arrived.

Tonight they were going to have a celebration.

They were celebrating the first year of the school and its success. They were also celebrating their new lives away from the Hellmouth.

Giles had also invited all the former members of the Watcher's Council, even the ones who refused to rejoin with Rupert Giles as the Head Watcher. He was determined to impress them with what he had done in such a short amount of time.


A tingling in her spine startled Buffy out of her musings. She knew that only one Vamp ever made her skin tingle LIKE THAT.

Then she heard a voice. She sighed; it had only been wishful thinking on her part.

It was only Angel.


When they had first got to Los Angeles, Angel seemed to think that she was coming for him. He had believed that they were going to pick up their doomed relationship from where they had left it. She had tried going out on a date with him, but it was awkward and completely uncomfortable. The evening had thankfully ended early when they were alerted to a demon they needed to go take care of.

She had also tried going out on a few jobs with Angel while she was in the city that had been an even bigger mistake. Angel didn't really understand the whole team concept, unless he was the team leader. Instead of letting her fight at his side like she and Spike used to do he relegated her to back up. He also seemed unable to realize she wasn't the young barely initiated Slayer he remembered.

It was a relief for her when the gang left Los Angeles to move into the school. Since then, she tended to avoid Angel as much as possible. She had meant it at the time when she told him sometimes she saw them together in the future, but now she didn't really see that anymore. Things that were once endearing about him, now she found irritating.

She had actually run into him, literally, last week. He had come to talk to Giles about something and she was running late for a movie date with Willow and Xander. They had exchanged pleasantries and like everyone else he inquired about what her plans for the future were now. She had told him a bit about wanting to travel the world. It was all pleasant enough, but as she excused her self to go meet her friends he got this look on his face. It had almost haunted her since then. It was desperate and nostalgic, yet resigned and so filled with love and pain.

She never found out what he talked with Giles about and she wasn't sure she wanted to know. Buffy figured if it had anything to do with her they would have told her. She and Giles and made a pact to never keep secrets from each other again.

Giles was still the same old Giles even though he was now head of the Council. He had chosen the suite directly attached to the library to make his home. He spent almost six months going through all the texts they now had access to through Wolfram & Hart.

It took Buffy a while to feel completely comfortable around Giles again. She had a hard time reconciling the fact that she disappointed him; while at the same time he disappointed and betrayed her. Eventually, though she had come to realize that Giles did view her as his daughter and even parents made mistakes in wanting the best for their children. While privately he still treated her like an errant child, he viewed her ideas and opinions the same way he would an equal.

Buffy brought her thoughts back to the present. She was out here for a reason and she needed to get on with it before the others came looking for her.

She picked up the wine glass she had set on the table when she walked out onto the balcony.

"I'm sure you would prefer this to be whiskey or scotch, but its a special occasion tonight." She smiled as she looked up at the stars.

"I miss you, Spike." She said sweetly to the night. "I still love you."

She held up her wine in a toast and drank it down quickly.

"BUFFY!!" She jumped up startled. She relaxed when she turned and saw Clem standing in the doorway looking at her excitedly.

"You have to come and see what Angel brought us. You have to come. HURRY UP!!" With that he turned and ran back down the stairs, well as close to running as he could come.

Buffy shook her head and smiled. It didn't take much to get Clem all excited. The last time he told her to 'hurry up' it was to see the new Dawson's Creek box set he got from Andrew.

Buffy had run into Clem while out on a job with Angel. She had broken the news to him about Spike and the two of them spent the night doing shots of whiskey, while remembering the bleached vampire. It was the only time she ever really got to grieve for him.

When the Scoobies left LA to start work on the school, Clem had offered to come along and help. Giles was more than a little reluctant to accept the help from a demon, but with both Buffy and Dawn insisting, Giles really didn't stand a chance. Now Clem was the school's resident expert on Demon Behavior. The Slayers loved having him as a teacher and Buffy knew he loved being here.

"BUFFY!!!" Dawn's scream cut through the air as she ran up the stairs two at a time. Buffy could see the huge smile on her face before her sister even made it to the top of the stairs.

"What is it, Dawnie? What's going on?" Buffy was really beginning to wonder what had both Dawn and Clem so excitable.

Dawn was in charge of the Watcher research department for the school. She had impressed even Giles with her quick mind and the way she picked up not only foreign and dead languages, but demon languages as well. Buffy heard him say more than once he wished she had been as attentive as her sister in the reading/researching department. Buffy figured it was the mystical key part of her that allowed her to translate such difficult texts.

Dawn was growing into a beautiful and competent young woman. Buffy was constantly amazed with how in charge and grown up she was. There were times she looked at her and didn't even recognize her baby sister.

"Angel brought us a surprise." Dawn ran up and looked her sister over quickly. "Yo-you have to fix your hair, you were letting it blow all around out here. Plus you need to fix your eye makeup its all sorts of smudgy."

Dawn tried to straighten out her sister's hair with her shaking fingers, but she only succeeded in pulling some out.

"OUCH!!" Buffy yelled, stepping back away from her. "Enough with the torture, just tell me WHAT is going on?"

Dawn stepped back and took in the light silk dress her sister had on. It clung to her figure like a slip, with spaghetti straps and a deep-scooped neckline that could almost be considered scandalous. She looked good Dawn thought.

Dawn giggled, when she thought of the reactions her sister was going to get.

It was then that Buffy noticed what her sister was wearing.

"Are those my hand painted silk pants from China?" Buffy demanded. "Dawn, we've talked about this. You can only borrow my clothes if you ask me first. And I know you didn't ask me about those, because I would have said 'no'. I haven't even worn them yet."

"Oh, please. You got them over two months ago, someone needed to break them in." Dawn told her defiantly, momentarily forgetting her excitement in her irritation with her sister.

"You better not spill anything on them." Buffy warned her.

"Fine, whatever, no spilling. Got it. Now come on!!" Dawn grabbed Buffy's hand and started pulling her off the balcony just as Giles and Angel were climbing the stairs to them.

"Buffy are you planning on going downstairs now?" Giles asked as he reached the top step. He looked rather worried and his voice came out nervous.

Angel also had a worried look on his face.

Buffy suddenly thought back to that day when Angel had disappeared into library with Giles. Her eyes narrowed as her temper started to flare with suspicions.

"Actually I thought I might go downstairs with out planning first. Live dangerously." Buffy answered her Watcher sarcastically.

The two men just exchanged nervous glances.

"What is going on guys? Why do you two look like you're about to attend a funeral, while Dawn and Clem are about to float off to Cloud 9?" Buffy was really trying to hold in her temper, really she was.

"Don't mind them Buffy. Its not like someone conjured up a weird happiness demon..." Dawn told her calming slightly in her bouncing.

"Well, that would almost be preferable..." Giles muttered into his scotch.

"Giles." Dawn turned to him. "Don't start that again. You can't, not after everything that's happened..." her voice trailed off as she looked at Giles and Angle almost pleadingly. "Its like a miracle."

"I'm well aware of everything that has happened, Dawn." Giles snapped at the girl. He stopped realizing how harsh that came out, took a deep breath and a long drink of scotch. When he continued his voice was more calm and reserved.

"I just don't know if this is really the best for everyone involved. We still don't know what all the repercussions are for something like this. Not to mention the last time something like this happened there was nothing but trouble. And on tonight of all nights..." Giles removed his glasses and proceeded to try and clean them while balancing his glass.

Angel glared at him and almost growled as he spoke. "All the tests we did indicate it isn't some sort of evil." He smiled bitterly. "It must be a 'miracle'. Not a miracle for me, but..."

"Oh, bloody hell." Giles muttered as some scotch splashed onto his sleeve. He put his glasses back on and looked over at Angel.

"As far as doing it tonight, well, it wouldn't wait any longer."

"Fine." Buffy snapped, by their look of shock she could tell they had forgotten she was standing there. "You three stay up here and talk in code. I'm going downstairs to find out what's going on."

Buffy moved to step around Angel and go downstairs when he grabbed her hand. She looked up into his eyes and saw that lost look again.

"Buffy, can we talk a minute first?"

Buffy would have screamed in frustration if it weren't for that damned look on his face. She forced what she hoped was an understanding smile on her face.

"Sure, Angel." She turned to walk back on the balcony she had just left, grabbing Giles' glass on her way. "Welcome to my balcony" She said gesturing for him to follow her.

Angel turned to Giles and Dawn.

"It may be a good idea to do this up here. I don't know how she's going to react." He said quietly.

"What are you talking about? She is so going to freak." Dawn told him as she turned and hurried down the stairs.

Giles took off his glasses that he had just put back on and started cleaning them again as he slowly followed her.

"I believe that was his point, Dawn." He commented dryly. "Oh dear." Came floating back up to Angel as they disappeared down the stairs.

Angel swallowed hard and prepared to talk to Buffy.


Angel stepped out onto the balcony and saw Buffy staring up at the stars with a small smile on her face. He wondered briefly what she was thinking of to make her smile like that, before deciding it was probably best if he didn't know.

"You look beautiful tonight." He commented softly, pulling her out of her thoughts.

Her smile faded as she shrugged off his compliment. She didn't want to go there with him right now, especially not here.

"That isn't what you wanted to talk to me about." She told him pointedly.

"No, its not." Buffy turned to face him as he moved further out on the balcony, standing next to her at the railing.

For the first time Angel noticed how different the woman before him was from the girl he once knew. She was still beautiful, of course, but gone was the innocence that he once thought was the core of her beauty. He remembered the guileless way she used to look at him, the softness of her face, the easy smile that would come to her at the slightest provocation.

Now there was a cloudiness in her gaze. The softness in her face was replaced with lean determination. There was also an aura of wisdom and sadness about her, the wisdom that only came from loss and pain.

'How much of that was caused by me?' He wondered to himself. 'Angelus or me, it doesn't make too much of a difference now.'

He looked away to try and ignore the guilt and regrets that were building up inside him. She didn't want to hear those now.

"Cordelia is gone, Buffy." He finally told her.

Buffy watched him closely while she waited for him to continue. She knew that Cordelia had been in a coma and not expected to wake up. No one could really explain how Cordelia had come to be in a coma, but they had hinted that she and Angel had been involved.

While Buffy and Cordelia had never really been friends, she had been a part of Buffy's life from her first day in Sunnydale. It had been weird to see the once vibrant cheerleader, lying motionless in the hospital bed. It was even stranger to think of her as gone.

The tingling feeling Buffy had felt when Angel first arrived suddenly came back, stronger than before. She felt anticipation inside her similar to when she was getting ready for a big fight. The air around her felt charged, electric.

"When?" She finally spoke, when it appeared Angel wasn't going to continue.

Her voice came out dry and she took a large drink from the scotch, forgetting what it was causing her to choke and cough.

"About a month ago. She didn't actually die. The Powers called her back up to the Higher Planes."

The air felt so heavy, like it did before a large thunderstorm.

Buffy reached out to grab onto the railing, only instead of using it to anchor her, this time she used it to hold herself up. The tingling inside her grew stronger until she thought she had to be physically vibrating with the force of it.

"They needed someone to take over receiving the visions from the Powers." Angel continued on, not even noticing her anymore, he was so lost in his own thoughts.

Buffy's breathing was getting shaky, she couldn't seem to get enough oxygen with the air like this.

"They needed a demon to be able to handle the visions. Since there aren't any demons alive, that were volunteering to go to work for the Powers, they kind of went...outside of the box."

"ENOUGH ALREADY!!" Buffy exploded, gasping for air, that didn't seem to be there. "I've had it with these cryptic clues, Angel. Don't you think we're a bit beyond that by now? If you have something to tell me, then just tell me already, enough with these games."

Her voice sounded panicked even to her. Buffy stopped and forced herself to take some deep breaths and calm down.

Angel just watched her sadly. "I will always love you, Buffy." He told her intently.

Frustrated and more than a little wigged out, Buffy turned to walk inside...

and froze.

She felt the world start to break apart around her at what she saw.

The glass in her hands slipped out of her grasp and shattered on the floor.

She smelled the leather and cigarettes moments before the voice came.

"Hello, Luv."

The world had stopped for Buffy.

He was there in front of her. She could see him clearly. He was leaning against the doorframe in that familiar cocky way. He was wearing a black suit, with a black shirt underneath. His ever-present duster hung over his lean frame, slightly throwing off the effect of the suit. His lips curved up into a small smile. His eyes seemed to drink her in. She could see the love and desire shouting out at her in his gaze.

Time started again, only it seemed to be moving in slow motion.

She tried to breathe, but found herself gasping again. She looked over at Angel to see if he saw what she did, but he was still just staring at her with that sad look in his eyes.

‘Oh, god.’ Buffy thought to herself hysterically. ‘This isn’t real. I’m just hallucinating again. Not this, anything but this.’

Her knees gave out from under her and she felt herself begin to fall under the tsunami of emotions rolling through her. She looked back at the Spike vision as time speeded up and the floor rushed to meet her. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Angel reach out to catch her, since he was right next to her, but before he could even touch her the Spike vision crossed the balcony with a speed unnatural even for a vampire. He put his arms around her waist and pulled her up and to him before she could hit the floor, growling at Angel for his attempt.

Angel lowered his hands and back farther away from them.

At the feeling of Spike’s arms holding her, sobs began to escape Buffy.

He was solid.

He was real.

She clutched his coat and pulled him tighter against her crying wildly as her emotions completely overtook her. She was never going to let him go again.

‘If this is a dream, please don’t let me wake up. I can’t take losing him again.’

Buffy could feel him rubbing her back, comforting her. As her sobbing slowed she could hear his voice in her ear.

“Shhh. Its ok, Pet. I promise, its all ok.”

After a few minutes, Buffy slowly pulled herself together and became fully aware of what was going on.

Over Spike’s shoulder she could see Dawn, Xander, Willow and Clem standing in the doorway looking at her happily. A few feet behind them was a very worried looking Giles, with a new glass of scotch. Angel was now on the far side of the balcony, watching them, his face thoughtful and pensive.

Suddenly, she pulled back from Spike’s arms sniffling. She used the back of her hand to wipe the tears from her face as she stared into his eyes reassuring herself that this was indeed her Spike.

“Spike?” She questioned quietly.

He smiled at her warmly.

“Yeah, Slayer.”

“You’re real.”

“Yeah, I believe I am.”

“But are you really here…to stay?”

His smile grew bigger.

“For as long as you want me. And probably a few days after that.”

She smiled back at him so sweetly, so very sweetly. He was lost in her.

He never saw the fist coming for his face. He flew backwards through the picture window next to the door and onto the ground. For a few seconds he lay there stunned, before that was replaced with the outraged anger she knew so well.

“What the BLOODY HELL was that?” He growled at her.
She stalked towards him, her face a mask of rage. As she approached him voices filtered through her red haze.

“Uh Buff, you break it, you fix it!!!” Xander nervously was saying.

“Buffy, stop…” Dawn’s voice pleading with her.

“Should I stop her?” Willow uncertain as to whether or not she should use her magic here.

“Oh, Bloody hell.” Giles probably worried about what the Council was thinking of the loud crashing noises.

And off to her left, the sound of chuckling.

Buffy stopped and turned quickly to face Angel.

“You want to tell me what is so funny right now Angel?” Her voice came out cold and deadly. The amusement on his face quickly disappeared at the daggers that were shooting out of her eyes.

She walked over to him standing right in front of him, only a few inches away. Her eyes bored into his.

“How long?” She demanded.

He didn’t even have to ask what she was talking about.

“Last month, when they called Cordelia back, the left HIM in her place.” He explained bitterly.

Buffy sucker punched him in the stomach. As he doubled over in pain she looked over and met Giles’ gaze. He stepped back at the anger he saw directed at him.

“You knew.” Her voice came out at a growl.

“Yes.” Giles told her. He sounded defeated.

“I wouldn’t let him tell you, Buffy.” Angel’s voice came weakly from behind her as he struggled to stand upright again. She was going to dispense more of her anger at Angel when she noticed Spike standing again in the frame of the broken window. When her gaze turned back on him fully, he evidently decided he didn’t want to be that close to the broken wood and stepped back into the house.

“Slayer…” He began.

Before he could finish she lifted the skirt of her dress out of her way and leaped over and kicked him in the chest. He flew into a wall.

"That's for waiting a MONTH to tell me you were back,” She yelled.

He was getting seriously pissed. Damn, stubborn, hotheaded woman, if she would just stop and listen. Of course, her stubbornness was one of the things he loved most about her. Even still she could have at least heard him out.

"Now listen here..." He began. Another fist came at his face.

He dodged it and tried to grab her, but she spun away doing a maneuver he didn't know. She grabbed his arm swung him around into the wall face first this time and punched him again in the ribs.

"Oh I'm sorry,” She said sweetly. "I've been spending the last year training while you were busy playing dead."

She got another punch in his ribs.

"That's for getting 'terrified' and bailing the first chance you got.”

He sensed the fist coming and managed to duck before it could connect with his skull. He spun around just in time for her knee to connect with his groin. He hit the ground with a moan.

"You even got to play the part of the martyr so I couldn't be mad at you!!!" She pulled him up by his shirt.

"I couldn't get out." He managed to yell trying to get past the haze of pain. "You knew there was no getting out of there for me. I was already on fire Luv."

He almost pleaded with her. "Remember your hand?"

She hesitated for a split second. He moved instantly, he tried to pin her hands so she couldn't attack him again. She got away from his grip easily.

"YOU DIDN'T EVEN TRY!!!" She looked at him and he backed up against the wall frozen at the rage and pain in her eyes.

He couldn't help but wonder if she was going to pull a stake and send him back where he came from. Wouldn't that just be his bloody luck?

By now the rest of the gang had come slowly up the stairs. Buffy was aware that everyone was watching them as she stood in front of him.

He seemed to have given up the idea of trying to fight her and just watched her warily; head cocked to the side, to see what was next.

"This is for telling me I didn't love you." She whispered and smacked him as hard as she could with a closed fist across his jaw. All of her pain and anger went into that blow and he flew to the ground.

"What?!?!" He asked incredulously as soon as he could speak again. He looked up at her, his eyes wide, blood running down his chin from a cut lip. He knew he couldn't have heard her right.

He slowly pulled himself up, wiping the blood off his face.

Instead of answering him she looked back at the others who were still watching them as he stood up. All of them looked concerned, but no one made a move to get in between them.

"Spike..." She turned back to him. He flinched a bit away from her, but his eyes never left her.

"William" She said only loud enough for him to hear. She watched his face carefully.

"I...love...you." She yelled it loud so everyone, even the ones who weren't the whole way up the stairs could hear her. He stared at her in complete shock.

"I am telling you in front of my friends and family. I love you. Do you believe me now?" Her voice broke and last part came out as a whisper, but he heard it.

“I love you.”

Her head dropped down, when she looked up again there were tears in her eyes.

"I thought you only said that because I was dying." He said finally, his voice sounded raw with emotion, his eyes were wet with his own unshed tears. His face was confused and hopeful and so scared all at once.

"You really are an idiot, you know. I told you that because I loved you." She said looking into his blue eyes that she never thought she'd see again. They searched her eyes, looking for the truth of her words. She answered him with all the love in her heart.

"You know I love you." He said with a smile.

She smiled back at him. She reached out and gently wiped the blood that started welling up again off his lip.

"Well I love you, too." She told him

All of a sudden his hands were on her waist lifting her up and spinning her around while he laughed delightedly. She put her hands on his shoulders and laughed with him while he spun her around. Their eyes never left each other.


Angel felt his heart break at the sound of their laughter. It was a sound that would cost him his soul, the sound of true happiness. He knew now that he and Buffy would never be together again. Willow smiled at him sadly as he walked off the balcony towards her. She squeezed his shoulder in sympathy and he nodded his thanks at her concern. He turned back to look at the two of them still spinning.

Just for a second Angel thought he saw a glowing, silver wrapping around them and down in between them. As soon as he registered it, it was gone. He figured it was just a trick of his eyes seeing her blonde hair and his black coat floating out from behind them.

Then he looked over a Willow who had a thoughtful look on her face.


Spike put Buffy down before they got too dizzy. He held her close to him as they stared at each other then pulled her to him and kissed her deeply. She fell into his kiss as the world around them flew away.

Dawn, Clem and Andrew clapped their hands and cheered.

Willow and Xander smiled at each other as Willow wrapped her arm around Kennedy's waist.

"So was that some kind of Slayer mating ritual?" Gunn asked Wesley.

Wesley just shook his head.

"I think they're sweet." Fred said smiling up at Wesley who squeezed her hand lightly.



Buffy's entire body tingled. She was more aware of him than she had ever been before. His hands were on her waist holding her close to him, while his lean body was pressed up against her. Her hands were flat on his chest and she could feel his muscles beneath them through the layers of clothing that covered him.

Spike's lips were soft on hers and yet demanding. She had refused them her love for so long and now they were greedy for it.

Kisses between them in the past, when she allowed him the intimacy of kissing her, had always been an angry, violent duel between them. This was something else entirely.

She explored his mouth with her lips like she was kissing him for the first time. She could feel their cool texture. She opened her mouth and ran her tongue lightly over his lips needing to savor the taste of him.


She heard as well as felt him growl in his chest as he opened his mouth and tangled his tongue with hers.

Almost moaning Buffy wrapped her arms around his head pulling him closer to her. She felt like she could just melt into him. She tangled her hands in his hair as his hands held her tightly to him. Both were lost, completely oblivious to all her friends.

Then she Faith's voice cut through into her desire filled bubble.

"Way to go, B. He said you had it in you."

Blushing Buffy pulled away suddenly feeling light headed at the loss of contact. She saw the feeling reflected back at her in his eyes. His lips were parted slightly and he was breathing rapidly, forgetting that he didn't need oxygen.

Announcing to everyone she loved him was one thing, this was another.

"Uh, guys could you leave us alone for a few minutes?" As she turned around to face her friends she took a shaky step towards them. He quickly wrapped his arms around her waist again and pulled her back into him. Her voice had come out very breathy and she shivered at the feeling of his strong arms around her.

Faith laughed at the sound of her voice as she descended the stairs.

"All we need now is Anya here to comment on the situation." Buffy said wryly knowing she was blushing. Spike chuckled in her ear.

Xander nodded and laughed having also heard her comment.

"Actually, Buff, by now she would probably be pulling me into our room after that show." He said.

She blushed even harder.

"Just so you remember, Buffy...” he said as he turned and walked down the stairs with Willow and Kennedy.

"I know if I break I have to fix it." She recited in a sing-song voice, wishing they would all just go away now.

“Yep, and you can get started on that window tomorrow.”

Willow turned back and gave her a big knowing smile. "We'll see you guys soon, right?"

“The sooner you guys go, the sooner we’ll be down.” Buffy told her.

“Right. Of course.” Willow said.

Angel walked slowly over to Giles. Buffy felt a small twinge of sympathy for him, but she wouldn't dwell on that now.

"Does she have to make a production out of everything?" She heard Kennedy ask Willow as they descended the stairs.


Buffy rolled her eyes and resisted the temptation to push a heavy marble statue down the stairs after Kennedy. She looked over at Dawn and the sisters exchanged an evil grin, knowing they were both thinking the same thing.

"Buffy, er, I didn't mean to keep this from you..."Giles began awkwardly, interrupting her Kennedy hating.

"Giles," she said firmly, "You and I will talk about this tomorrow, not tonight, Ok?"

"Yes, perhaps that’s for the best." He said as meekly as a school child in trouble.

"This is really all my fault, Buffy." Angel said quietly.

Buffy sighed impatiently, ready to push them down the stairs.

"I don't really care right now guys. Tomorrow."

Angel looked at her for a moment. "We want you to be happy, Buffy. More than anything that's what we want."

Buffy felt the twinge of sympathy for him again; this couldn't be easy right after losing Cordelia. She softened her tone.

"I know. Can we please just leave it for tomorrow? Please?" She practically begged.

He nodded and he and Giles headed downstairs together leaving Dawn and Clem still bouncing excitedly at the top of the stairs.

"Don't think you two are going to stay up here all night and miss the party." Dawn said suddenly serious. "You can have sex anytime..."

Buffy felt Spike freeze in shock at Dawn's words.

"...but tonight is our celebration, of, well, everything." She grinned the cute Dawn grin at them quickly, and then it faded as she looked sternly at them.

"And you both will be there." She finished firmly.

"We will be, now go." Buffy said turning back towards Spike.

"And Spike later on we can catch up. I'll tell you what you've been missing on Passions and about Dawson's Creek. Did you know it ended last year?" Clem added.

"WHAT?!?!”

Spike’s shout of outrage made Buffy look up at him, irritated that he just yelled in her ear, but he didn’t even notice.

“No more Dawson's Creek? What happened with Joey and Pacey? Or did she choose that idiot Dawson?"

Buffy’s irritation soon changed to amusement listening to him rant over his show.

When Spike noticed Buffy and Dawn's amused looks he quickly tried to cover.

"Right. We'll be downstairs soon I promise..." He finished shortly.

Dawn and Clem finally turned and reluctantly headed down the stairs.

He chuckled again in her ear. "When did your sister get so unbelievably scary, again?" He asked her. She smiled.

"I don't know. I blame some of her childhood influences." She said, looking pointedly at him. He had the sense to duck his head sheepishly.

"If you two aren't down here in 20 minutes..." Dawn’s voice called up to them.

"Dawn, if you go now you can raid my closet for the next week without asking." She didn't even turn around to yell back at her sister. The sound of heels running down the stairs was her answer.

"Come here" She said, laughing as she pulled him through the doorway back onto the balcony.

"Are you going to hit me again?"

She laughed. "I would say 'no', but this is you we're talking about."


She closed her eyes and let the warm night air blow over her skin. She could feel the summer stars above her shining brightly. She held on to the rail of the balcony tightly as if to anchor herself and leaned back against him as his arms wrapped tightly around her waist.

"So...."

"So..."

"You're the new walkie-talkie for the Powers?"

"It seems that way. Haven't had a vision yet. From what I hear they aren't too much fun, but it can't be worse than that bloody chip."

"How did this happen?"

He laughed quietly.

"Well, I died, again, as you may remember." He rubbed his jaw, which really ached. She gave him an almost apologetic smile.

He just shook his head at her and continued.

"Then who do I meet up with but Darla and Cordelia in the afterlife. That was just a barrel of fun, let me tell you. They got to drag me all around reality and back to cleanse me of my past misdeeds and a bunch of other nonsense and had way too much fun annoying the piss out of me along the way."

Buffy looked pretty amused at that.

"So that's why you were gone for so long?"

"Yeah, I had quite a lot of misdeeds to atone for as I'm sure you can imagine." He said.

She didn't even bother to respond to that.

"I had forgotten what a pain Darla was and that, Cordelia, wasn't too much better. Bloody Angelus and his high maintenance women." At her tensing up he realized what he said.

"Oh I didn't mean you, pet." He said apologetically.

He continued wonderingly as he stared at the trees ahead of him.

"You're a Queen; beautiful, commanding, powerful. They are just whining, spoiled princesses next to you." He finished derisively.

She turned and looked up at him wide-eyed at what he just said.

'Bloody William and his poetry', Spike thought.

"Uh right," he continued, relieved he couldn't blush at least. "Once I was forgiven and purged of my sins and all that rot it was time for me to move on with Darla, not to hell mind you, I got a get out of hell free card, at least. It was like some sort Purgatory, working for the Powers, like a civil servant. Cordelia was to come back and do her job here as walkie-talkie.

Only your then your mum steps in and makes some appeal on my behalf to be allowed where she and Glinda were on the higher planes."

"My mom. You saw my mom?" Buffy turned in his arms to watch him as talked.

"Yeah. Evidently she, Glinda, and a couple of others somehow got together to try and help me." His voice was wondering as he remembered his surprise that anyone would care enough about what happened to him to stand up for him, much less Joyce of all people, especially after what he had done to her daughter.

"Your mum told me how proud of you and Dawn she is. She's been watching from up there. She kept me up to date on what you two were up to." Buffy smiled thinking of her Mother with Tara on the higher planes watching over them.

Spike paused for a few moments and studied her closely.

"She told me you made a point to talk to me every night." She smiled up at him and nodded "but I thought that was just your stupid Slayer nobility", he continued "not because you actually missed...OW!!"

He exclaimed as she leaned forward and bit him hard on his chest.

"Sorry, but you were being stupid again." She smiled up at him, cheerily.

"You didn't want me to hit you." She added innocently, blinking her eyes as if to further her proof.

Her eyes widened when she felt him harden against her and realized just how much she preferred these dress pants to his usual jean.

"If you have any hopes of us making down to that party, luv, I would recommend we not resort to biting." He almost purred in her ear.

She was suddenly aware of those hands on her waist; his thumb was rubbing her hip through the light material. Her own hands were moving slowly and softly over his arms up to his neck. One hand came up to lightly stroke his cheek as she looked into his eyes.

Now wasn't the time. She shook her head to clear it and took a step back.

"My mom..." She reminded.

"Your mom?" He asked his voice still low. He was still caught up in that energy. Not really believing at that moment he wasn't in heaven. Buffy was standing in his arms looking at him with such love.

"Spike." She used the exasperated tone she knew would get his attention.

"Your mum!! Right, thanks. Um, she's on the higher planes with the others, in a good place and she thought I should be there with them. The Powers seemed like they might agree with that when suddenly the Cheerleader gets all bent out shape and starts crying about not wanting to go back after everything
that had happened to her and how it wouldn't be fair for them to let me move on Yada, yada."

"What happened to Cordelia?" Buffy interrupted curiously, she really wanted to know what the back story was there.

"That's not really my story tell. Its between her, Darla, and Angel."

"Fine." Buffy said, trying not to get irritated.

'Someday I really want to know what went on there.' She thought to herself.

"So wait", suddenly she realized where he was going with this. "The Powers made you come back instead of moving on? They made you replace Cordelia instead of being in heaven?" Her eyes began to tear in pain for him. "I'm so sorry, Spike."

"Made me?" He snorted. "Hardly. The wankers gave me a "choice", but if that opportunity hadn't come up I would have found another way to come back."

"What?" She asked surprised. "You could have moved on and been at peace. Hello, heaven? Why would you want to come back?"

He didn't answer her, he pulled out of her arms and walked to the railing and looked out at the dark woods.

"This place is really beautiful. I never spent too much time in these parts." He said trying to change the subject.

Buffy came over and put a hand on his shoulder and turned him to face her.

He looked down at his feet. "I never even considered it, you know." He said quietly, "It wasn't even an option. It wasn't going to be Heaven for me, it couldn't. Not without..."

As his voice trailed off he looked at her, his eyes wet with unshed tears.

It hit her, what he was saying. Tears welled up in her eyes and she took his face in her hands. She pulled him towards her and slowly kissed him as the tears ran down both their faces.

As their kiss deepened, she remembered that they were on a time limit and Dawn would be up soon. With a groan she pulled herself away abruptly. He whimpered as he felt her step away and went to grab her back to him, but she danced out of his reach.

"Now, I want to know why you waited a month, before seeing me or telling me you were alive." She switched the subject to a topic that wasn't going to make her want to kiss him.

He gave her a wry look.

"When I first got back they weren't quite sure what to make of me. Angel wasn't exactly jumping for joy that I replaced Cordelia. Also there had been a bit of trouble last year when she came back from the higher planes, part of that other business..."

"Which I can't know about..." She interrupted frustrated.

He continued on as if he didn't hear her.

"They wanted to make sure I wasn't going to pull a repeat."

"And we're going to get to the part about not telling Buffy when?"

"They didn't want to tell you until they were sure they weren't going to have to kill me again. They didn't want to put you through that. I didn't argue too much because I knew that I wasn't evil and I knew from your mom that you were Ok and happy. If anything happened to change that Angel would be one of the first people to know and I could be here quickly if you needed me."

He frowned. "Plus Peaches seemed to need the time to adjust to the situation.

It wasn't like I was expecting any of this when I saw you again. I figured you had moved on to have your normal life, with a normal guy."

"So if you weren't expecting this, why would you choose come back?" Buffy asked him confused.

"It's where I belong. I told you I would never leave you." He shrugged helplessly.

If he didn't stop being so sweet she was going to forget the party and probably scar her little sister when she came up to get them.

Time to change topics again. Something that wouldn’t make her think about him naked.

"Since when do you care about how Angel's feeling?" She asked him.

"Its one of the bloody side effects of this soul. He pouts and I actually feel sorry for the Poof."

Buffy wondered for the millionth time what had happened to Angel. She knew they had grown apart, but evidently she missed some very critical things if even Spike was worried about him. Maybe she should try and talk to him later.

"Its alright, luv." He said, reading her mind, it thrilled her he could still do that. "He'll be ok."

She could see he was trying not to look concerned.

She smiled when she realized she knew exactly what he was thinking.

"I know. He's my friend, though, and I'm worried about him."


She put emphasis on the word friend. She remembered when he told her that she and Angel would never be friends because of their love.

"Buffy?" He asked quietly.

"I love you." She answered firmly.

He moved closer and put his arms around her again.

"I think it may take a while before it sinks in and I believe you."

"Well, I'll just have to work on convincing you then." She said, wrapping her arms around his neck.

He pulled her close and bent down to kiss her. She tensed in anticipation of feeling his lips again.

"Ok you two, times up."

Buffy glared over at her sister and Clem.

"I'm sorry guys, I didn't want to interrupt you, but she said it was our duty to make sure you made it to the party." Clem explained.

Buffy sighed in defeat and looked at Spike; he shrugged at her in response.

"Ok Dawn, we're ready to go to the party."

"Not like that you aren't. Your hair is a mess again, plus your eye makeup is even more smeared. You need to fix yourself up." She walked over and looked at Spike.

"You should take off the coat and stay a while." She said sarcastically.

Spike smiled down at her. "You know Nibblet, you are getting to be as beautiful and as bossy as your sister."

She stuck her tongue out at him.

"I seem to recall it was 'commanding' a few minutes ago." Buffy teased him about his poetic slip earlier. "Although, I have to agree with her on losing the coat and staying awhile.”

“You weren't planning on going anywhere were you?" Buffy asked him.

"Not unless you are." He answered her.

"Come on you put you coat on the couch." She pulled away from him and walked over to the doors leading to her living room. She tried to ignore the feeling of loss that went through her when she let go of him.

She walked into her living room and heard Spike gasp at the opulence of her suite. Buffy grinned at him.

"Like my new home?"


"God, pet, this is all yours?"

"Yep, I had to redecorate it of course. Before it was filled with all this ancient, gaudy stuff from like the Victorian era."

Spike gave her a side glance.

"So, you think the Victorian era is ancient, then?"

She remembered at that point that that was actually the time period he had lived in. "Well, not ancient, ancient. Not like Ancient Egypt of anything." She tried to cover lamely.

He smiled, amused at her attempt.

"I need to go fix my hair."

She ran off to her bathroom. Dawn and Clem had immediately sat themselves on one of the large black leather couches and started playing some car game with bad 80's music playing in the back ground. While Spike laid his coat on one of the sofas and wandered around looking at Buffy’s home.

"Dawn, where did your sis get the money for all this stuff?" Spike asked her taking in the living room. It was quite large with high ceilings and tall windows. It had several overstuffed black leather couches sitting on a plush deep green area rug. A flat screen plasma TV hung on the wall with some Bose stereo speakers. There was a large entertainment center filled with game consoles, a DVD player and a state of the art stereo system as well as another TV for games. In the corner was a large desk with a computer set up on it and a telephone.

"The Council paid for it." Dawn said smugly.

Spike shook his head and laughed imagining how Buffy had managed to convince Giles to shell out all this money for her rooms.

Spike moved into the small kitchen area that was set off to the side of the living room. It was equipped with a refrigerator, stove, a microwave and an island with barstools around it for eating. He opened the fridge hoping against hope to find a beer, but all that was in there was a half empty bottle of wine, some cans of Diet Coke and some yogurt. Not even a crumb of any sort of real food.

This was definitely Buffy's kitchen.

“I see she still hasn’t grasped the concept of cooking.” He commented.

Dawn laughed.

“Actually, she has gotten better. She can now make instant macaroni and cheese, and instant hot chocolate without a large disaster.” She told him.

“That’s something at least.” Spike muttered.

“I wouldn’t recommend eating the Mac & Cheese, though.” Clem told him. “The last time I did I was sick for days.”

“That’s because she decided it was too bland and tried to fix it with various spices. Ginger, Cinnamon and Dill really shouldn’t be used together.”

Spike just shook his head imagining Buffy opening up various containers, sniffing them and then dumping random amounts in a pot.

“She’s good with the hot chocolate, though.”

“Yup, just add water, not even she could mess that up.”


Spike wandered to the back of the living room, past the black lacquer dining table. There was a small half bathroom for guests and a short marble staircase.

He wandered up the ten stairs to find Buffy’s bedroom. The room had been done in a Moroccan style with deep blues, purple, reds, and greens. A large king sized bed sat to the left of the doorway draped with sheer curtains that had a metallic paisley design imprinted on them. There were two small tables on either side of the bed where her alarm clock sat and what he assumed was the charger for her cell phone. There were three walk-in closets that Buffy had filled to capacity (thanks again to the Watcher's Council he assumed).

Off to the right was another small, dark narrow stair that went up a few feet before opening into her bathroom. It had rose-colored marble floors and walls. A marble tub sat sunken into a pedestal of marble in front of a wall of windows facing the trees. There was a fancy new shower, the kind with several
jets at varying heights and angles. There was a long vanity with two sinks running along a wall of mirrors.

Buffy was in the bathroom standing there facing the mirror, with a happy smile on her face. She didn't seem to notice him yet so he moved further into the bathroom, coming up behind her.

Buffy looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. The hair was definitely in need of some help and her eye make up had that always-fashionable raccoon look. However, her eyes glowed with happiness, she didn't know she had. Her smile widened as she felt a presence next to her in the bathroom. She watched in the mirror, as her brush seemed to float off the counter and start running itself gently through her tangled hair.

She giggled at the sight. A small shiver ran through her as he lightly brushed some of her hair back away from her neck.

"Happy, pet?"

"On a scale of one to ten, I'm at about 50."

"Well come on then, lets go celebrate, then we'll see if we can't make that up to 100."

"Hello, I can't go like this. I need to fix my makeup first." She picked up a towel off the counter and turned on the sink to wash the offending make up off her face before applying a fresh batch.

"You look perfect to me." She smiled at the compliment.

"Yeah, but you have to say that." She told him before splashing water on her face.

"So what do you think of the place?" She asked over the now running water.

"Its beautiful. I can't believe you convinced the Watcher to buy you all this stuff with the Council's money."

She gave him a sly look.

It had irritated Buffy to no end how much money the Council actually had, considering they never offered to pay her, instead making her slave in that grease trap after her mom had died. Well she made sure that they made up for it when she decorated her suite.


"Oooh." Suddenly he understood. "You didn't ask did you, pet?"

"Originally I had full access to the accounts to fix this place up and buy myself a few things."

"How long did it take for you to lose that access?"

She giggled impishly before starting to wash her face off.

He loved the way her laugh sounded. He always dreamed of being around her when she was happy and relaxed so he could hear her laugh this freely.

"It was right after they delivered my Italian, Marble, Jacuzzi tub," she rinsed the soap off her face before continuing, "but believe me that tub is more than worth the price of the Wrath of Giles." She said after she wiped her face dry with the towel.

The image of her soaking in that tub naked almost made him dizzy for a moment.

Then another image came unwanted to his mind, from another bathroom, another time. The sound of crying filled his brain and he felt dizzy again for a different reason.

She was reapplying her eye make up in the mirror so she didn't see his face blanch as he took a step away from her in sudden fear. He turned and walked out of the bathroom quickly to regain control over the memories and their accompanying emotions.

He walked over to the windows in her bedroom and stared out into the darkness before him.

He swore to himself again and again that he was going to be good. There would be no sign of his old cocky, evil self. He was going to be good for her. He would be the perfect gentleman. He had another chance with her and he was determined not to mess it up this time.

"I know I went kinda Jessica Simpson with all this stuff." She continued their conversation as she entered the bedroom, make up now back to Buffy standards, completely unaware of the internal struggle going on within him.

"I mean who really needs 77 pairs of shoes.” She gestured towards the stairs leading down to her living room. “I don't even know how to work most of the stuff in the entertainment center. Dawn and Clem use it more than I do."


Then she noticed him standing quietly by the windows and realized he hadn't heard a word she said. She walked over to him and put a hand on his arm.

"Hey Bleach Boy, are you OK?" She asked softly.

He turned and smiled what he hoped was a carefree smile.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

She narrowed her eyes. She could tell he was lying, she just wasn’t sure if she should press him or not.

"I'm just thinking these rooms of yours have a lot of large windows and the only 'curtains' are around your bed."

She gave him a look that clearly said she knew that wasn't what he was thinking about, but she let it slide for now.

"Well it isn't like I have to worry about anyone seeing in, unless they are of the fluffy-tailed squirrel variety."

"I was thinking more of crispy fried vampire."

"Oh." She said understanding, and then her eyes lit up.

"Well that is something you don't have to worry about." She gestured to the windows in front of them. "These and all of the others are coated with a special no-frying vamps coating."

When he just looked at her confused she explained further.

"You know like Angel's office at Wolfram & Hart."

She moved to wrap her arms around him when he stepped away from her.

Surprised she looked up at him and saw what seemed a lot like anger in his eyes.

"And you have this on the windows in your bedroom and bath because...?"

His voice came out tight and quiet.

"Because every window in the mansion has the same coating." She said defensively, getting slightly angry that his thoughts led him to that conclusion.

"Oh." He said, cursing himself for not remembering his promise just a few moments before to not act like an arrogant ass anymore.

"Yeah, oh." She said turning around to walk down the stairs.

"Buffy." He called out to her desperately, terrified by the sight of her walking away.

She turned at his voice, saw the fear in his eyes and immediately melted.

"I'm sorry, luv. This is all just kind of overwhelming. I don't know what to think. I guess it’s just easier to believe nothings changed, really."

She smiled at him reassuringly and held her hands out to him. He stepped forward quickly and took her hands in his, holding them tightly.

"For us everything has changed." She said soothingly, looking into his eyes willing him to see that. She could see the fear, doubt and love looking back at her.

"Let's just get through this party tonight, then we can spend the rest of our lives getting used to it, Ok." She told him softly.

His heart soared at her words.

"I love you." He whispered.

The smile that lit up her face at his words was like watching the sun come out.

"I love you, too." It was like music to him, a favorite song he wanted to play over and over.

She leaned forward and lightly kissed him.

"You two better not be having sex up there." Dawn's voice came up the stairs pulling them apart.

They groaned at the interruption.

"I really think you let her spend way too much time with Anya." Spike told her laughing. Her patented eye roll was his only response.

"We're not having sex, Dawnie." Buffy yelled down to her sister trying to use her best 'mom' voice. "We're coming now."

She sighed resigned.

She took one of her hands back from Spike and turned to lead him down the stairs into the living room. He had other ideas and didn't move with her instead pulling her back against him tightly.

"Not yet, but later we will be." He whispered in her ear before releasing her to stroll down the stairs.

"Hey! That's just mean." She whined as she followed him.

After fixing Buffy's hair and make up, the four of them entered the crowded ball room. There were easily a hundred people in the room, most all of them members of the Council that Angel found. Classical music played over the stereo system that had been set up for the occasion. Waiters walked around with trays of drinks. Everyone looked very nice and it all seemed very cultured and polite. Buffy was disappointed, a celebration this was not.

Buffy spotted Faith as soon as she walked in. She had on a tight black velvet dress that clung to her every curve and had her practically popping out on top.

Faith looked bored, but when she saw Buffy she gave her a sly grin and a wink, that earned her a glare in return.

"Spike?" Buffy remembered something she heard Faith say upstairs.

He looked at her in answer.


"What did Faith mean when she said 'He said you had it in you.' upstairs?"

His eyes got very wide, both Buffy and Dawn were looking at him with a look that had to be a genetic. He quickly looked around the room for an escape.

"No clue, Luv." He said. "I'm going to go check on my favorite forehead, he’s probably off brooding in a corner. I'll find you in a few."
With that he gave her a quick kiss dashed off quickly with Clem trying to keep up. He risked a glance back at Buffy and knew by the look on her face that he was going to hear it later. He smiled as he turned back around, that was ok.

She loved him.

That fact made anything bearable. Even this stupid party.

As he picked his way deeper into the crowd he began to feel eyes following him as he moved. He looked at all the uptight Council jerks, suddenly noticing that they all seemed to be studying him. Most were subtle about it averting there eyes quickly when he looked at them.

Some were more obvious openly staring at him, curiously. The way a few of them watched him reminded him of the Initiative blokes who would come and study him in his cage. He grimaced at the memory.

He continued to make his way across the floor to Angel, but he paid more attention to the conversations around him.

"...killed two Slayers..."

"...that's the second vampire she's..."

"...the records are unclear; some say Angelus, some say Drusilla..."

"...the four of them were an unholy force..."

"...she trusts them?"

"...shouldn't be allowed..."

"...they both have souls?"

"...had a chip..."

"...couldn't feed..."

"...in love with both of them..."

By the time he reached Angel he wanted to kill something.

"I've been trying to shut it out myself." Angel said knowing that look on Spike's face. He took a long drink out of his glass, before Spike grabbed it from his hand and finished it.

"You would think with all their research on vampires they would remember the sensitive hearing." Spike snapped loudly.

Some of them had the manners to look embarrassed, all of them moved away from the two.

"You always did have a way with people, William." Angel said smiling.

Clem had finally caught up with Spike, Xander and Andrew followed closely behind.

Over the summer Xander and Andrew had become like brothers. They had their mutual love for comic books and all other things nerd-like, but what truly connected them was Anya. Andrew never stopped wondering about the young woman who had essentially died for him. Xander looked out for him because in a way it brought him closer to Anya. It didn't stop Andrew from being annoying, but most everyone was getting better at tolerating him.

"Some of these humans are so rude. One of them actually stopped me and used me as a visual display." Clem complained as he walked up.

"Luckily I was able to step in and rescue him before they started the actual dissection." Xander said proudly.

"Deadboy, Deadboy Jr." He acknowledged Spike and Angel.

Xander was still Xander even with only one eye.
Not only was he the in charge of the upkeep and construction around the school, he was also a counselor for the girls. He had helped more than a few of the more experienced Slayers through their nightmares and fears since their last fight with the First, not to mention helping Buffy on those occasions when, no matter how hard she tried, the pain and regrets came slinking into her mind and she would go to him and cry on his shoulder. He was the only one she confided to about what all had happened between her and Spike. Surprisingly he didn't ever judge her or even scold her for her actions. He would comfort her and tell her it would be alright, and then make her laugh in that way only Xander could.


"Xander when are you going to stop calling me that?" Angel asked tiredly.

"Probably never."

Spike snickered.

Just then Robin walked up. He gave Spike a cold impassive stare.

"Xander have you seen Faith anywhere?"

"No. Have you checked the largest collection of handsome men?" Xander wasn’t sure what the relationship was between Robin and Faith. They both insisted they were only friends, but at the same time, they were very rarely apart.

"She was by the door when we came in. Buffy and Dawn are with her somewhere now." Spike answered Robin.

Robin turned his eyes back on Spike. For a long moment no one said anything brown eyes met blue levelly. Finally Robin looked away first and scanned the crowd for any sign of the two oldest Slayers.

"That won't be good. I know Faith was complaining of boredom when I left her." Robin said.

"You better go find them. Bored Slayers are dangerous Slayers, especially Buffy and Faith." Xander quipped.

Robin glared coldly at Spike before moving on to find Faith.

"I'm going to go too and see where Dawn went." Clem said following Robin.

"I didn‘t realize you and our new principal were so close Spike." Angel‘s tone of voice asked the questions his words didn‘t.

Spike looked uncomfortable.


"I can't believe he and Buffy dated." Andrew said staring after Robin, oblivious to any other conversation going on.

"Oh" Angel said with knowing smirk.

"He doesn't know?" Xander asked Spike.

"I would've thought one of you Scoobies would regale him with that tale while I was gone." Spike said stiffly.

Xander didn't reply to that. Spike sighed.

"Do you remember Nikki?" Spike asked Angel.

"Nikki?"

"The Slayer I killed in New York."

"You know her name?!" Angel's voice was surprised sarcasm.

"She was his mum." Angel was shocked.

"He tried to kill Spike last year. Locked him in a garage filled with crosses and weapons, then used some mind control implanted in Spike from the First to call out his Demon and proceeded to beat on him." Andrew excitedly filled Angel in.

"What?!?! "Angel asked angrily, Spike was his Childe after all and nothing about that sounded fair.

"He and the Watcher teamed up to keep Buffy from knowing and said they were taking me some place 'safe'." Spike added dryly. "I don't blame the bloke for trying or wanting me dead for that matter. I just wasn't about to let him kill me."

"I thought you and Buffy weren't together last year?" Angel asked.

"Huh?" Spike looked at him confused. "We weren't. What brought that up?"

"Why else would Giles have wanted you dead? You had a soul."

Spike didn't answer, his mind was contemplating what Angel had just said.

"Yeah but he was killing things." Andrew broke in unwanted "He broke through a wall to try and kill me. Of course that was because the First made him. That was also before we went on our top secret mission together and became friends."

Angel and Xander looked amused.

"Do you think now that you are back from the dead they'll send us on any more secret missions?" Andrew continued on before anyone else could and change the subject. "It could be like it was before. Do you still have the Hog? The two of us back together like Batman and Robin."

Angel broke out laughing.

Spike smiled slowly.

"Hey Andrew, remember that story you told me on the way back from our mission to make sure I didn't fall asleep?"

"Oh! You mean the one about how I first met Buffy up until the point where we were on your motorcycle."

"That's the one.” God how he wished he could forget it. “I told Angel a bit about it and he's been dying to hear it first hand."

He heard Angel choke behind him.

"Great. I can even tell him what's happened since then." Andrew walked over to Angel and began talking excitedly.

“It started about 9 years ago…”

"I think I'm going to get another drink." Angel said, defeated as he walked to the bar with Andrew following behind barely even pausing in his story for breath.


After watching Spike disappear into the crowd Dawn and Buffy headed over to talk to Faith.

"Hey B, didn't expect to see you again so soon." Faith greeted her as they walked up.

"Yeah, well Dawn wanted to make sure we were present for this bowl full o'fun."

"I know. What's up with this? I thought we were gonna have a party and instead we have a bunch of old dusty people making with the chit chat."

"I blame Giles." Buffy said.

“Who else could turn a happy celebration into this.” Faith agreed with her.

Dawn had been looking around at the guests, not really paying attention to Buffy and Faith, she noticed that many of them seemed to be studying the girls. She thought she heard the word 'key' mentioned more than once.

"Guys," She interrupted Faith and Buffy. "Do either of you notice the stares we are getting?"

Buffy looked around and saw several sets of eyes glance away from hers as she scanned the room.

"Its been like that since I got here. For a while I tried to listen to some of their conversations, but I didn't like what I heard too much. A few have come up and asked me some stuff, trying to be all polite and crap.

They are real interested in us. Some grilled me about being locked up, some wanted the scoop on Wes and Giles, and more than a few asked about ‘The Key’.

But B and her boyfriends, both past and present seems like a favorite topic."

Buffy's eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Hey, don't give me the evil look, girlfriend, I put them in their place, but it doesn't seem to have fazed them too much."

"I am not going to spend the night being studied by a bunch of Watchers. There are other things I could be doing right now." Buffy said angrily.

“Like getting to know that blonde hunk of yours?” Faith asked her.

Buffy only gave her a sly grin as response.

"So we're going to ditch the party?" Dawn asked sounding disappointed.

"No." Buffy answered. "Not yet, I have an idea. Faith, go round up the girls and our gang, meet me by the back of the ball room in 5. I'm going to go find Lorne."

Faith grinned. "So I take we are going to have a little back room private party for ourselves?"

"If you'd rather stay here and be a lab rat for Council Curiosity, be my guest."

"What can I do, Buffy?" Dawn asked.

"First, go upstairs and find us some real music, then find Spike and Clem and make sure they know what's going on." She paused a moment. "Actually you better find Spike and Clem first."

"You mean before Spike eats some curious Council member."

"That's the general idea."

Dawn turned to walk away.

"Hey brat, if you see Robin..."

"I'll let him know where you are Faith. Although, he should appear any minute, its been a whole 10 minutes, you two usually aren't apart that long."

Faith glared at her back as she walked away.

"Ok, lets do this." She said to Buffy. The two girls set off on their respective missions.


As Spike watched Angel and Andrew walk away with an evil grin he became aware that he was left alone with Xander. He looked over at him and realized he couldn't be considered a "whelp" anymore. He had grown up in the past 5 years. There was a calm about him now that he didn't have before.

Spike hadn't ever known any humans long enough to watch them change as they aged. A strange discomfort came over him as he looked at the young man before him seeing how much he had aged.

"Harris." He said feeling that Xander had something on his mind.

"We need to talk Spike." Xander said seriously.

In his head Spike groaned. He knew it was going to happen eventually. He had hoped to have a few days before the threats started.

"Look, Harris, I know this diddy. If I hurt Buffy you are going to stake me. You may just do it anyhow on principle. I am an Evil Undead thing." He intoned as if reading from a script.

"Hey! Wow that was pretty good. We trained you well." Spike fought not to growl at him, the boy evidently still hadn't learned any manners.

Xander nodded at Spike's face, but continued anyway. "Actually I was going to say Thank You."

Spike felt his jaw drop and he gaped at Xander.

"I remember that you were the one who pulled Caleb off of me that night in the winery. If it weren't for you I could be completely blind right now or worse. With the whole crazy apocalypse thing I never got to thank you."

"Yeah, well, the only reason I did that was because they Slayer would have been real upset if she lost you.“ Spike told him honestly.

"That's the other thing. I know that you won't ever do anything to hurt her because you love her too much. I trust you with her; I know that you don‘t ever want to do anything that would hurt her." Xander looked away out at the crowded ball room.

Spike didn't think his jaw could drop any farther.

"I mean after the THIRD time you got tortured for her I figured you had to love her. No one could be that twisted." He paused

"Please tell me you're not that twisted, are you?" Xander half-joked uncomfortably, looking back at him.

"As hard as all this is for me to admit," Xander continued after getting no response from Spike. "those stupid faces you keep making make it a lot easier." Spike snapped his mouth shut and clenched his jaw.

"There you are!!" Xander said with a small grin.

"Look, Buffy has been doing great all year, better than great. She has been more alive and happier than I have ever seen her. She got her fire back and she let go of a lot of the pain and guilt she was holding onto. Yet there always seemed to be something missing in her.

A couple of times she woke me up in the middle of the night, knocking on my door with tears running down her face. I would hold her until she calmed down, then we would talk. She finally told me everything that happened between the two of you."

Spike swallowed and waited.

"She told me that when we first brought her back that you were the only one she could stand to be around. She told me how you listened to her and made her feel like she wasn’t some sort of freak. She told me that she treated you horribly and you still loved her and wouldn’t leave no matter how hard she tried to make you hate her. She said without you she probably would have found a way to die in the first 3 months.”

Xander watched Spike as he told him this, he didn’t want to say these things to him, but in all honesty Spike deserved to know.


“She told me, without you, she would never have had the strength or the courage to defeat the First. She said that your love and trust in her made her face what she had to do. You were the only one who believed in her and were there for her after we...uh...we...

"Threw her out on her arse like a bunch of ingrates." Spike finished for him.

"Not quite what I was going for, but ultimately true."

Xander paused, shifted his feet and looked around the room. Spike watched him. Finally Xander fixed his eye on Spike.

"Look, you should know she's been trying to live her life without regrets, she said everything that has happened has made her who she is today and taught her something. The one regret she couldn't let go of was that you died not believing she loved you and the time she wasted because she should have told you before."
Spike turned around quickly and walked over to look out of a window. He was not going to let Harris see him with tears in his eyes. Soul or no soul there had to be line somewhere, he couldn't go completely soft. Thankfully the boy understood that and let him go. He hoped there weren't going to be anymore revelations tonight, he wasn't sure he could take much more of this.

He swore again that he was going to be a stand up man for her. He was going to be as good as gold, the perfect gentleman. This time he wasn't going to muck it all up. He would be perfect... what she deserved no matter what it took.

He got himself back under control and walked back over to Xander. Angel and Andrew had just gotten back and Angel looked miserable. He reminded Spike of one of those animals ready to chew off its own limb to get away.

Gunn approached quickly from behind Xander.

"I don't want to interrupt your male bonding session here guys, but this you must see."

"What's going on?" Xander asked.

"I can't even describe it you just have to see it for yourselves."

They moved to follow him along the wall of the ballroom avoiding the stuffy party guests. In the far corner there was a doorway that led into another room.

Gone was the classical music and stuffy Council members. They were in a large living room that opened up onto a large patio in the back. Off to the right was the poo,l closed off by a glass wall. There were 5 overstuffed sofas in the middle of the room, on the left wall was a fully stocked bar. Loud dance music pounded from behind the bar where Lorne was obviously enjoying his role as DJ and bartender, several young Slayers danced close to him.

"Hey guys. Where have you been?" He called to them over the loud dance music. "You have to go check out the scene on the porch. Pure magic."

They made their way through the crowded room. Everywhere there were young Slayers giggling and talking having fun. Wesley and Fred were with a few of the more progressive Council members talking on the couch.


"Hey. How come everyone else was here having fun while I was stuck with Nerd Boy and the Undead Twins?" Xander complained.

Gunn didn't answer and the others chose to ignore him as they followed Gunn out onto the patio. Spike noticed Robin standing just outside of the doorway staring intently at the large group dancing on the patio.
Andrew quickly ran out and joined Dawn and Clem cutting up and laughing at each other's cheesy disco moves.

A few of the young Slayers with them Spike recognized from before.
Willow and her little girlfriend were moving slowly together unaware of the world around them.

In the middle was a sight that made his knees go weak. Buffy and Faith were wrapped around each other dancing seductively together.

Both girls had their eyes closed lost in the rhythm of the music. Faith was behind Buffy facing her; she had her hands on Buffy's hip guiding her as they moved. Buffy was leaned back into Faith both arms raised, pushing her chest out enticingly. Her hands were holding on to the back of Faith's neck as she moved along with her. Her iridescent dress looked alive and liquid in the moonlight.

She was so beautiful free and wild like that, completely lost in the music. He quickly looked away and tightened his fists trying clear his head. Then he noticed the look on Angel and Gunn's face. He looked to his other side and saw Harris wasn't in much better shape.

As the music surged the girls broke away from each other spinning and moving to the music before coming back to each other moving together, up and down on the dance floor. Buffy grabbed Faith's shoulders as Faith again pulled Buffy to her by her hips. Blonde and brown hair flew wildly around as the girls lost themselves together letting go completely.

For several seconds Spike saw nothing through his haze of jealousy and lust. The urge to grab her, take her and claim her as his was overwhelming. He wanted to show all these other men exactly who she belonged to.

No!!! He shook his head quickly trying clear it. He fought to keep his demon under control.

In his head he heard crying; he could see Buffy pain and fear on her face laying on her bathroom floor looking up at him. He stepped back at the pain exploding in his chest. His demon shrank back at the memory of hurting Buffy.

He noticed the music had stopped he was struggling for control. He was shaking slightly from the effort it took to control his demon, his hands and jaw clenched tight. He looked over at Xander then Angel both had dazed expressions on their faces, neither had noticed his struggle it seemed. Gunn had a huge smile, only Robin looked unaffected by the scene.

Noticing a bench behind him Spike dropped down on it suddenly feeling exhausted from his inner battles. Xander and Angel followed his example.

"I can die happy now." Xander said in awe, both Angel and Spike glared at him. Xander didn't even notice.

Spike looked out at the girls and saw that they were all standing there talking and laughing, acting for all the world like they didn’t know they just had every man in the room captivated.
Feeling his eyes on her Buffy looked up at him.

Her face lit up in a warm smile that came unconsciously to her face as soon as she saw him. She seemed to float over to him and he was again shocked by the thought that she loved him.

She loved him and he could see it clearly on her face. Everything else flew out of his head and he felt himself grinning at her foolishly, feeling like a school boy.

She sat down on his lap and he felt a shiver of pleasure go through him at the contact, he was pleased to note a similar shiver run through her. They exchanged a knowing look.

"Hey Buffster." Xander said weakly. "Those were some dance moves out there."

Spike glared at him again, but Buffy just laughed.

"Sometimes after Faith and I would patrol we'd be wound up, so we'd go out dancing." She explained.

Spike’s hands on her waist clenched unconsciously, again, at the thought of all the men that had watched her dance like that. She looked at him curiously, but he kept his face blank.

Xander whistled his mind on the same track as Spike‘s.

"I bet you made a lot of men cry in their beers." He said.

Buffy shrugged "Most of them were fine and left us alone." Buffy said simply.

"The ones who didn't learned their lesson the hard way." Faith added walking up to them with Willow and Kennedy, as always Robin shadowed her.

She and Buffy laughed together.

"Hey you two, no teasing and terrorizing locals, you keep that up and we'll have to send a chaperone along with you next time." Willow scolded

"Something tells me B is going to have an alternative method to blow off steam from now on." Faith said with a grin. Buffy blushed and looked up at Spike as Kennedy started rambling about how she and Rhona didn’t need to go out to let off steam.

Spike was looking through her at something only he could see. His eyes were stormy and his fists were still clenched in the fabric of her dress.

"Hey there, Space boy, come back to Earth." She teased getting his attention, his eyes were definitely not happy.

"Didn't you like my dancing?" Buffy asked innocently, batting her eyes coquettishly and smiling up at him.

"About as much as every other man here. Oh and apparently Northern California, as well." He growled at her.

Buffy looked at Spike amused as she leaned forward and affectionately hugged him.

"Yeah, but you get to have the knowledge that you are the one I'm thinking about when I'm dancing like that." She whispered softly, making sure not even Angel could hear her. She pulled back and laughed low when he inhaled sharply enjoying the effect her words had on him.

She caught sight of Giles walking up to them quickly, looking much stressed.

"Hey Giles, that's a raging party you've got going on in there." She said as he walked up.

"Yes thank you, Buffy." He said distractedly. "Um, Willow I need to speak with you, right now, please." With that he turned and walked quickly back inside.

"Ok Giles." She shrugged over at Buffy and Xander who looked at her in question and turned to follow him. She had to almost run to catch up to him.

Buffy looked over at Angel suspiciously.

"Hey don't look at me. I don't know anything."

Buffy bit back the comment that came into her mind, but he saw it on her face.

"Buffy!!!" Dawn's nervous voice caused her to jump slightly in Spike's lap. "We should take Angel and Spike to that place in the woods where we sat and talked that day. Remember that place? We should go there. Now."

"Hey Brat, you been drinking Espressos again?" Faith asked

"Faith!! Oh!!” Dawn’s eyes widened even further. “You should come with us on our walk. A walk would be good don't you think?"

Xander stood up and put his arm on Dawn's shoulder to hold her still as she shifted nervously. "A walk in the woods...at night...in the dark...in evening wear..."Xander asked her incredulously, and then he caught sight of something inside. "...sounds like a good idea to me. We should definitely go for a walk."

Robin and Faith noticed Xander's gaze and turned to look. They saw Willow, Giles, Wesley and Fred talking to a young couple with their backs to them.

Buffy got off Spike's lap and walked over to her sister and her friend.

"Are you two feeling all right? You're acting all wiggy." She asked concerned.

She saw Xander frantically signaling her with his good eye. She shifted her eyes in the house and turned to Spike and Angel quickly.

"A WALK.” She said loudly as she caught sight of what had Dawn and Xander so frazzled. “A walk does sound refreshing. "

"Slayer, what’s got your knickers in a bunch?"

"No knickers bunching, not at all. And really you need to get some new expressions.

Just have excess energy. Know what's good for that? A walk. Or a swim. Did you know we have a pool? Let's go look at the pool." She stepped forward to pull Spike and Angel up. They moved together away from the door while Dawn and Xander grabbed Faith to pull her along behind the others.

Just then Giles and a guilty looking Willow walked out the patio door with the young couple. Faith gasped when she recognized the young man.

"Oh shit." She said.

Angel and Spike turned to look back and froze.

Defeated Buffy let go of the vampires and walked over to the newcomers.

"Hi Riley, Sam." Buffy's voice squeaked out nervously.

Riley's face was stone as he noticed Angel. Then he saw Spike and she saw his eyes flare with hate. Trying to act like that wasn't what she was doing Buffy moved in between Riley and Spike

"Buffy." Riley said he took her hand and stepped forward and kissed her on the cheek. Angel and Spike both stepped closer at that. "You look lovely, as always." He said smoothly.

"Thank you, Riley. You look good, too." She hugged Sam lightly. "Sam, you look beautiful."

"Thank you Buffy. It's great to see you again." She smiled, warmly at Buffy, but she was keeping a close eye on her husband who was still eyeing Angel and Spike warily.

"You remember Dawn and Xander." Buffy stepped out of the way as they came forward putting more people between Riley and the two vampires.

Xander and Riley greeted each other and Dawn and Sam hugged.

"This is Willow's girlfriend Kennedy." Kennedy smiled and waved, Buffy fought the urge to roll her eyes.

"And this is Angel and Spike." Sam smiled politely and held out her hand to them. Riley tensed, but didn't say anything.

"It's nice to meet you." Spike said as he stepped up next to Buffy and shook her hand aware of Riley watching him. Angel repeated his actions and stood on the other side of Buffy. Faith was trying to slip away unnoticed behind them, but Robin stepped forward cutting off her escape and introduced himself.

"I'm Robin Wood." He said to Riley "I'm going to be the school's principle."

"Riley Finn. It's nice to meet you."

Riley noticed Faith looking at him from behind Robin.

"I'm sorry. I'm Riley" he said. Robin moved out of the way and Riley stepped forward with his hand out to her.

Buffy spoke before she could stop herself.

"Oh you've met her before Riley. You remember Faith, don't you?" She said sweetly.

Riley quickly withdrew his hand. Sam's smile faltered. Faith looked like she wanted to crawl away.

Willow finally broke the awkward silence before things could get any worse.

"So, um, I've been e-mailing Sam about our adventures. You know keeping them updated and all. Turns out the government is interested in our school and would like to form some sort of communication agreement. Remember Buffy, Giles told us someone from the government contacted him. Well anyhoo, they decided to send Sam and Riley to initiate that because of all the history." Willow's voice got higher and faster as she talked.

"I don't mean HISTORY, history. Not bad history anyhow. History as in stuff from the past, it doesn't have to be bad."

"Willow." Kennedy said stopping her rambling before it got worse.

"Thanks, sweetie. Although you are supposed to stop me before I get to that point." She whispered loudly to her.

"I know. You're just so cute when you get all worked up and your face turns red."

"What kind of agreement?" Buffy asked Riley ignoring the two girls.

"I'm not sure about government involvement in this. They didn't handle things too well the last time." Angel said at the same time.

"Well of course this will be something we'll have to sit down and talk about at great length, not tonight." Giles soothed Angel. "Well, I should be getting back in to the REAL party. There are guests I must see to." He shot a glare at Buffy and Faith, who looked at the floor.

"I will need all of you to come in soon, there is going to be a presentation of sorts."

"OOOOOH. Sound like even more rockin' fun G-man." Buffy answered back teasing him.

Giles just sighed and walked away muttering to himself about insufferable children.

“Is it me or is he getting MORE English in his old age?” Buffy joked trying to interrupt the glaring match between Angel and Riley.

“If by English you mean stiff, proper and way too uptight that would be a definite yes.” Xander jumped in an attempt to help Buffy.

“Uh, excuse me you two, English, not uptight, standing right here.” Spike cut in. Buffy gave him an apologetic shrug.

"Is there something you don't want the government to know?" Riley asked Angel. Buffy and Sam both winced at his tone and Angel clenched his jaw. Then he smiled coldly remembering how good it felt to hit this boy.

Riley responded by tensing perceptively, his eyes hard and challenging.

Spike recognized Angelus on Angel's face and realized he was going to have to be the one who took charge of this situation. He really wanted nothing more than to hit the boy himself, but he had to be good for Buffy.

"Come on Peaches. I need another drink and a smoke. Let's hit the bar."

Buffy looked up at him surprised but grateful as he grabbed Angel's arm and steered him into the living room to Lorne and the bar. Faith used this as her chance to escape and followed quickly behind the two.

"So Sam," Dawn said, trying to lighten the mood. "Have you been any place exciting lately?"

"Actually we just got back from Thailand." Sam answered regaining her smile finally. She started telling the others about their latest adventures in Thailand moving away from Riley and Buffy.

Riley stared at her for a moment.

"Thank you for your help last year." She said quietly.

"Willow told Sam he died."

"He did. The Powers That Be sent him back. I just found out tonight."

Riley shook his head and laughed bitterly at that. After a moment.

"Are you happy Buffy?"

"I am." She said with a genuine smile. She looked behind him and saw Spike gaping at a red faced Faith while Lorne laughed.

"Riley, I'm going to go inside. This is just uncomfortable for both of us."

"They should probably send someone else to be the main contact between the school and the government." He agreed.

"No, you could do that. I don't think I'm going to stay here." She told him.

"Your not?" He was surprised by that.

"Nope. I want to travel the world. See some of these sights you and Sam talk about."

"Is HE going with you?" Riley asked, not bothering to try and hide the bitterness in his voice.

Buffy paused. "I don't know I haven't asked him. Or told him I want to go. Like I said tonight is the first I've seen him since..." her voice trailed off as she watched Spike. He was watching Angel tease Faith about something a relaxed smile on his face. Her chest swelled with happiness as she realized again that he was really back. Feeling her watching him he raised his eyes to meet hers. She felt an overwhelming need to go touch him to make sure he wasn't going to disappear.

"Excuse me, Riley." She said absently as she headed inside. He grabbed her arm as she moved to walk past him. He spoke urgently to her.

"Part of me will always love you Buffy. While I don't approve of your choices, I want you to be happy. If you ever need me I will be there in an instant."

He let go of her arm. "I also hope one day it won't be so uncomfortable."

She smiled genuinely at him. "I hope so too, Riley. Excuse me."



Spike had pulled Angel inside and quickly guided him to the bar.

"Two whiskeys." He told the bartender.

Faith came up beside them.

"Make that three." She said.

"What's with these faces mi amigos?" Lorne asked. "Didn't anyone tell you this was a party?" When they ignored him, he looked at Spike.

"You can tell this is your Childe, Angel. He seems to have that brooding thing down."

"I don't bloody brood. I'm no Nancyboy like the Peaches here."

Angel didn't even take the bait.

The drinks came and all three took a long drink.

Angel spoke first.

"I don't like that guy."

"What guy?" Lorne asked.

"Wanker." Spike agreed with Angel, lighting a cigarette he had got off the bartender.

"Riley." Faith answered Lorne. "B's token human boyfriend."

"Aah" Lorne said understanding.

"He staked me once." Spike commented.

Angel raised an eyebrow at him.

"Plastic stake." He explained. "Told me if I touched Buffy he would come back and use the real thing."

"I see you listened as well as you always did."

Spike grinned smugly. He looked past Angel to Faith.

"So, what did you do that upset Captain Cardboard so much?" He asked her.

"Remember the first time we met, when I was wearing B's skin?" He nodded smirking at the memory.

"Well you weren't the only stop on the tour and that ride was a bit more involved."

Spike stared at her wide eyed.

"You took her body and shagged Captain Cardboard?”

“OUCH!!! Remind me to stay on your good side." Lorne laughed.

"You shagged HIM? Seriously. He didn't notice you weren't Buffy?"

She gave him a look.

"You didn't notice."

Angel and Lorne both swung around to look at him now.

"I bloody would have if it would've gotten to that point."

"Right. You were so gone on her even at that point; you would have just thanked your lucky stars."

Angel looked back at Faith.

"She wanted to kill you when she came after you in LA."

"Yeah and I'm sure you sending her packing helped that."

Spike snorted at him.

"Bloody Idiot" He muttered, picking up his drink when Angel glared at him.

All three took another drink.

"So Faith," Angel said conversationally "what's with you and our new Principal."

Faith choked on the whiskey. When she recovered she tried to make a cocky grin, but couldn't.

"Nothing. What are you talking about?" She asked defensively.

'Shit!' She thought to herself

Angel grinned at her.

"Oh, come on, you two are never more than 10 feet apart for more than 15 minutes. When you are together you fight like an old married couple. Don't even get me started about the looks you give each other when the other isn't looking."

Spike enjoyed the girl's apparent embarrassment. She was an attractive girl, definitely wild. Had they met up when they were both still evil they probably could have done some damage, both to each other and the world at large.

She couldn't hold a candle to his Slayer though. He smiled thinking of her. He looked up and saw her staring in at him from outside. The look in her eyes made the rest of the room disappear. He watched as she said something to Riley and made her way to him.

"Hey." She said coming up to him. She hugged him tightly. "I just wanted to make sure you were still real." She said pulling back and looking up at him.

Just then a strange looking waiter walked towards them. He was an older man, slightly balding with glasses on, but it was the look in his eyes that made him seem strange. He didn't look like an ordinary waiter. He walked up to the two of them and held his tray out.

"Cheese?" He asked.

Buffy turned pale and her eyes widened with shock, confusion and some fear. She looked around the room wildly for a moment.

"No. No cheese. No thank you. No cheese."

The waiter just grinned at her and walked away. Spike looked at her unsure as to what just happened. Finally she relaxed and turned back to him.

"This night is getting awfully surreal." She said.

"You're telling me." He answered thinking of his earlier conversation with Xander.

"Hey guys." Clem said walking up. "Giles said to get everyone into the ball room he's going to give his speech and do the whole ceremony thing."

As they moved towards the ballroom together, Buffy and Spike got caught up in the flow of people. Buffy quickly laced her fingers through his to make sure she didn't lose him in the crowd.

Rationally she knew she was being silly, it was only about 35-40 people, but she just had this feeling that if she didn't keep a tight hold on him she would look up to find him disappearing right before her eyes.

As they neared the doorway, they had to move closer to each other as the guests filed back inside. Spike felt an electrical current running through him every time she brushed against him. He couldn’t wait until they were alone and he could just have her in his arms without being interrupted by any nosy Watchers, or friends. He inhaled deeply, just to savor the scent of her.

Buffy leaned farther back into him, when she felt him sniff at her hair.

As soon as they were through the doorway she pulled him off to the side, out of the way of the other guests. He saw her grin at him impishly for a second, before she leaned forward and kissed him deeply. His surprise only lasted mere moments before he kissed her back hungrily.

Just as quickly as she attacked him, Buffy pulled back, turned and started pulling him farther into the ballroom. Spike was too shell shocked to do anything, but follow her dumbly.

“I just realized that I can do that anytime I feel like it.” When she looked back at him her eyes were dancing.

Spike’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully. Anytime? He immediately began to look for a darkened corner he might be able to entice her into.

When Buffy glanced at him again she saw the evil glint in his eyes as they prowled the ballroom, searching for something.

"What are you up to?" Buffy paused to let him catch up to her so she could ask him quietly. "Not planning on tormenting the stuffy old Watchers, I hope." She had felt their eyes on her since they had entered the room. Most of them weren't even bothering to hide the disgust on their faces at the sight of a Slayer holding hands with a vampire. All in all it made Buffy think an adolescent gesture was necessary, like making out with said vampire in the middle of the floor. She bit her lip and her eyes lit up at the thought of kissing him again. Spike's voice interrupted her little fantasy.

"Not too concerned with what a bunch of stuffed shirts think, luv. I was actually jus' thinking’ about pulling you off in a dark corner while everyone else is listenin to Rupes." He gave her his best sexy look, running his tongue over his teeth and raising an eyebrow at her.

He was really only teasing her to get a rise out of her, he knew Buffy would never agree to something like that.

"Actually, I know where the back staircase is that leads right up to my suite." She told him, imitating his look down to the eyebrow.

Spike stopped short and turned to her. She was willing to skip out on all this Watcher junk to be with him? The images it conjured in his brain had his demon growling within him.

"I mean who stays after the speech? Especially one of Giles'. We can always catch the highlights later from Will and Xander. Probably be way more entertaining." The fact that he wasn't saying anything was starting to make her a little bit nervous. Maybe he wasn't as anxious as she was for them to be alone together.

Except this was Spike, he always wanted her didn't he?

Was she being to pushy?

Then he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her close to him and she could immediately tell how much he liked the idea of being alone with her.

She really was loving these dress pants.

The close contact took her breath away and immediately drove out any of the doubts that were floating around in her head.

"Why, Slayer, are you actually suggestin' we sneak out of this nice Watcher shindig?" He spoke low and deliberate right in her ear.

"Just so I can see if you actually wore any knickers under your fancy suit." She answered him right back, running her fingertips along the waist band his pants. She felt him shiver at her words and was delighted in the power she had over him.

Spike pulled back and was about to tell her to lead the way, when he caught sight of Riley. He was moving farther into the ballroom, glaring right at the two of them standing there.

Now it was Spike's turn to resist an adolescent urge; he wanted nothing more than to thumb his nose at Riley or yell ‘Nyah, nyah‘.

'He never could have gotten the Slayer to sneak off with him,' he thought to himself.

'No, Riley wouldn't have ever thought of something like that. He wouldn‘t have ever tried to pull Buffy off into the dark with him.’

Spike wasn't sure where that thought had come from, but it was like a glass of cold water was poured over him. He thought back to the night in the Bronze where he told Buffy she belonged in the dark with him. He had been so wrong.

He pulled out of Buffy's arms determined to do the right thing. He promised himself he would be a good man for her. Sneaking off to have illicit sex was not being good. It didn’t matter whether or not she loved him now, it wasn’t the right thing to do. He had to be good for Buffy. He had to be worthy for Buffy.

Inside him the demon started screaming, the torment of being close enough to touch her, to smell her, to have her willing and yet still be denied was winding it up into a fury.

He tried to calm down and get himself under control before he wound up vamping out in the middle of the Watcher’s. He never had so much trouble controlling the demon inside of him.

Spike heard the crying again in his head, Buffy yelling ‘no‘. She was hurt. He had hurt her.

The demon retreated immediately, the image of hurting Buffy enough to give Spike the edge he needed to control it.

The dizziness he felt outside returned, only stronger this time. He swayed for a moment before regaining his balance.

"Spike?" Buffy's concern brought his attention fully back to what was going on around him. "Spike are you Ok? What's wrong?" She sounded so nervous and scared.

Spike forced a polite smile on his face. "Its nothing pet, just been a long day I guess."

The playful smiled returned to her face and he felt himself relax slightly at the sight of it. "Then I believe its time for us to get out of this place and put you to bed." She said teasingly.

His smile faded, as he remembered again the promises he made to himself. "Maybe we should stay and hear the Watcher. Its the right thing to do.”

Ok now Buffy was confused. One minute he couldn’t wait to be alone with her the next it seemed like he was afraid to be alone with her. Since when had Spike ever cared about what was the right thing to do, especially when it came to the Watcher's Council?

Unsure of what was going on, but not wanting to push this issue right now, Buffy relented. She stopped rubbing on him and stepped back away from him, noting that he relaxed slightly when she backed off.

"I guess we could stay for the speech, that way we won't miss anything." She hesitantly reached for his hand, feeling slightly better when he took it immediately and squeezed it. However, the look of relief on his face when she said they could stay there made her heart ache.

There was something wrong here, Buffy was certain of it. She just didn't know what it was. However, the unsettling feeling inside her that she was losing him, was growing.

Just then Willow came up to the two of them and bounced nervously.

"Hi guys. How ya doin?" She asked them.

"Uh, fine Will, how are you doing?" Buffy asked while watching her friend bounce on her heels.

"Pet, have you noticed every time one of your mates or family start bouncing like that one of your ex's appears." Spike asked her, both of them now watching Willow as she bounced nervously. Willow seemed to have forgotten they were even there.

"Yeah, but I'm out of ex's now.” Buffy considered for a minute. “Hey, maybe Will got in touch with Harmony?"

The look Spike shot her was so full of horror she had to laugh out loud. The noise seemed to remind Willow where she was.

"So Buffy, I'm sorry about the whole Riley thing. I didn't mean for that to happen. I know how awkward it is when your ex shows up right when you are trying to rebuild your relationship with your girlfriend. Who you love very much, by the way."

"Hey, who you calling a girl, Red?" Spike asked her, indignantly.

Buffy just looked at them both confused, then she saw him walking up to them and it all made sense.

"Oz, Oh my god." Buffy quickly walked up and hugged him. Since her back was to Spike she never saw his eyes start to glow, nor did she hear his warning growl to Oz.

Willow noticed and jumped back away from him towards Oz.

“Buffy?” Willow asked her she tapped Buffy’s arm to get her attention.

"Buffy, its good to see you. You look good, for one of the formerly dead." Buffy just laughed at the typical 'Oz' compliment. She turned back to Spike to reintroduce them, she hadn‘t noticed Willows agitation yet.

"You remember Spike don't you, from all the times he tried to kill us? Don’t worry, he's all soul having now. Only his is more permanent than Angel."

Oz's eyes glowed for a moment before he lowered his head indicating he had no desire to challenge Spike.

Again Willow was the only one who noticed since Buffy was now facing Spike. The two men nodded at each other in understanding.

"I didn't know you were coming tonight, Oz." Buffy commented turning back around to face Oz, but her eyes landed on Willow for a second. Long enough for Willow to understand the unasked question.

“Well, Willow e-mailed me and invited me. I liked the idea of seeing you guys again.”

Spike could hear Willow’s heart beating a mile a minute. Spike hoped it was because she was nervous about seeing her Wolf Boy again and not about what she had seen him do.

When Oz had first walked up and Buffy had gone to hug him, Spike's demon came forth with out him even having a chance to try and stop it. It felt threatened by the Werewolf touching what it considered HIS mate. Thankfully, Oz seemed to understand and instead of making an issue of it, just placated Spike’s demon by acknowledging it as a Master.

Spike knew Willow had noticed their little display, but he didn’t want to explain in front of Buffy. He didn’t want to give her any excuse to think he couldn’t be trusted. He had to be good for her.

Inside his head was pounding, he never knew it was possible for vampires to get stress headaches, but all of this was beginning to take its toll on him. He had no idea it was going to be this hard to be right for Buffy.

"Buffy, luv. I need to go get a drink." Spike said, feeling the need to get away for a few minutes and clear his head.

"Ok, I'll come with you." She told him. He fought the urge to sigh.

"Great." He said. "Nice to see you again, mate. Red."

With that they turned and walked off to the bar.

Willow immediately turned to Oz.

"Um, Ok what was up with the little 'Grrr' display?" Willow asked confused.

"Vampires, like werewolves mate for life, or unlife in their case. However, if the demon chooses its mate, but hasn't had a chance to claim her yet, it tends to get slightly possesive of any males that could challenge it for the female."

"Mating? So is mating like siring or turning? Should I be worried about him with Buffy?" Willow was already worried.

Oz hastened to reassure her. "Its not a bad thing. Its like a marriage in the truest sense of the word. You share your life with someone else completely. There is a psychic connection that comes with it too. I’m told its similar to the sire-childe bond, only mates are much closer because they actually choose to be together."

"So is he going to have to bite her to mate with her?"

"With two vampires, they bite each other to mark each other. Since Buffy is a human, well, not a vampire anyway, I don't really know how that would work."

"But wait, Angel already marked Buffy a long time ago, remember when Faith poisoned him and he bit her?”

“Yeah, but she didn’t return his claim, right?”

“No, he left right after that. He broke her heart by just walking away from her like that.”

Willow found herself staring in Oz’s eyes remember the feelings she once had for him. She remembered all the little things about him she found so endearing. The best part of being with Oz was that he loved her for all her little quirks, as well.

Willow looked down at her hands nervously to break that train of thought. "So, uh, do werewolves get this psychic connection too?"

"Yeah. One old couple I met in Siberia barely spoke out loud to each other they just didn't need to. They had been the elders of their tribe for almost 70 years. They always said their love made them strong."

Oz looked at Willow trying to get her to meet his eyes. Finally he just sighed.

"You know since YOU invited ME here, I kinda thought you would be, I don’t know, Ok with me being here."

"I am ok with you being here. Its just that I e-mailed you and e-mail you isn't really like you, you. I just didn't realize the in person you would be so you, you."

Oz just raised an eyebrow at her questioningly.

Willow whimpered slightly, she couldn‘t even begin to explain her way out of that one, it was time for a tactical retreat.

"I need to go find Kennedy before she thinks I've run off on her. Not that she would ever think that because we are happy together."

Oz still didn't say anything, although his lips twitched slightly.

Just then a strange looking waiter approached the two with a tray of sliced cheese. He held his tray in Willow's face. "Cheeese?" He asked, seeming to draw out the word cheese longer than necessary.

Willow's brain tickled with a long forgotten memory, but she couldn't pull it to the surface.

"No. Thank you." Her tone implied the 'Go Away, you creep me out' she was too polite to say.

After watching the strange cheese man walk away she looked over at Oz and felt a shiver run through her. A shiver that no good lesbian should have for someone not a girl.

"I have to go now." Willow said determined. "I have to go find my loving girlfriend, who I love in return." With that she turned and marched off to find her loving girlfriend, Kennedy.

Kennedy, her loving girlfriend, who she loved in return. It would all be ok if she just kept telling herself that.


"Yep she wants you."

Oz turned his head to see a large demon that kind of reminded him of a big, tan dachshund.

"What makes you say that?" Oz asked him curious.

"Well, you see, with these Scooby women, the more they yell at you and insist they don't want you, the more they actually do want you."

"Is that so?"

"Believe me I've seen it before. Now Willow was still pretty calm so she isn't head over heels yet, but you are definitely under her skin." When the demon nodded his head his ears flopped all over.

"Well, we'll see what happens won't we?" Oz said partially to himself and partially to the demon next to him.

Oz had figured after his last trip to Sunnydale he and Willow were done for good. However, he loved getting her e-mails, they were one of the highlights of his days. And it felt so good to see her again, he hadn’t realized how much he missed the sound of her voice rambling on nervously.

He turned back to the Dachshund Demon. "I'm Oz, by the way."

The demon shook his hand vigorously. "Clem. Nice to meet you."

"I didn't expect to see any demons here tonight." Oz commented.

"I'm a teacher, here at the school."

Clem puffed up whenever he told people that he was a teacher. He still couldn’t believe he had a real job, just being himself, his mother would be so proud of him!!

"Really? What do you teach?" Oz asked.

"Demon Behavior."

"That makes sense."


Spike and Buffy had just gotten their drinks when Giles started to speak over the microphone.

“Attention, Attention. Everyone, if I could have your attention please, I promise to be brief.”

Somewhere off to her right Buffy heard Faith and Xander start laughing at that.

“If you give me your attention, I promise this will only take a few moments.”

Everyone finally began to quiet down and give Giles their attention.

“Thank you. I tried to write a speech for tonight. I wanted to say something to give you an idea of all that we have accomplished and endured for the last seven years. It finally occurred to me that it simply wasn’t possible to adequately describe the past seven years with mere words.

I can tell you that I have been blessed, unlike any other Watcher in history, I was able to watch my Slayer grow from an impulsive and willful young girl to a beautiful young woman.
I also had the good fortune to work with some truly extraordinary human beings. Even though they had no demon hunting experience, they never once backed down from a fight. This small group of people saved the world for time and time again. I know there were times they wanted to quit just walk away and pretend none of this existed, but they always came through in the end.
It is to these people that we owe a debt of gratitude.

Willow, Xander, Buffy? Would you three come up here please?”

Buffy gave Spike a quick peck on the cheek before moving forward to meet Xander and Willow on there way. All three looked nervous and embarrassed to be singled out like this.


They stood behind Giles looking uncomfortable.

“These are the true heroes from the Sunnydale Hellmouth.” Everyone in the room burst into applause.

Buffy and Willow turned red while Xander took a bow, then feeling silly the girls started bowing as well.

“Would any of you like to say anything?” Willow shook her head ‘no’ emphatically. Xander took the microphone from Giles and smiled winningly at the crowd.

“I would like to thank Big Bird for teaching me that sometimes those imaginary friends you have aren’t so imaginary. I would also like to thank my first dog Pepe, for teaching me…”

At that point Giles took the microphone Xander ignoring the shouts of protest from the younger crowd as he did. “Yes, thank you for that Xander. Buffy, did you have anything you wanted to say?”

Buffy looked uncertain for a moment, before stepping forward and taking the mike. She looked out into the crowd in front of her. She could see all the younger Slayers looking at her, waiting anxiously to hear what she was going to say. She could see the Watcher’s getting out their notepads to make sure they got it all down. She saw Faith off to one side making faces at her in attempt to make her laugh.

Buffy took a deep breath and began. “Someone once told me…” She stopped, that wasn’t right.

She scanned the crowd again, searching. Then she spotted him standing towards him towards the back. She didn’t know how she could’ve missed him with that bright white hair. He gave her an encouraging smile. She smiled back at him and began again.

“Spike once told me that the reason I lasted as long as I did was because my friends and family kept me here. As Giles already pointed out my friends helped to save the world time and time again, even before they had any special abilities.
They did more than that, however. They made me laugh, when I needed to. They were there for me, for no other reason then they were my friends and they wanted to help me. They stood by at times, when I didn’t even want to stand by me.
Its pretty easy to be a hero when you are a Slayer, that’s what we are made to do. They chose to risk their lives, to me that makes them much more heroic.

We also need to take a moment and remember those who couldn‘t be with us today, but are no less heroes.” Buffy slowly recited the names to the crowd. “Jenny, Kendra, Tara, Anya, and my Mother.”

Buffy stopped for a moment and wiped at the tears threatening to run down her face.

“Its thanks to all these people, and several more who I didn‘t mention, that I am able to stand before you. They’ve given much more than my life, they’ve helped give me the opportunity to LIVE my life.

Thank you, guys.”

With that Buffy started crying. Willow and Xander quickly ran up and hugged her. Dawn also ran up on the stage and hugged her sister tightly. Giles stood off to the side, tears running down his face as well before Dawn and Buffy pulled him into their group hug.

The potentials burst into applause, shouts and whistles. Some of the Council members even joined them in the accolades.

As the applause died down people seemed to sense that the speeches were over. Most of the young girls started leaving and heading back to their respective dorms. While school was out for the summer, most of them had to get early tomorrow for training.

People surrounded Buffy and the Scoobies, some were old friends, others were strangers just offering their congratulations. Buffy looked everywhere for a glimpse of Spike. Then again she knew he wasn’t too big on the whole group hug concept.

Buffy began to edge her way out of the crowd, when Giles grabbed her.

“Buffy some former members of the Watcher’s Council would like to meet you.”

“Do I have too, Giles? Don’t I get any brownie points for actually STAYING for the speech.”

“Yes, you get oodles and oodles of brownie points, but you still must come meet these gentlemen.” Giles lowered his voice so only she could hear him. “These gentlemen were some of the Senior Officers on the Watcher’s Council. They were removed to safety as soon as it became apparent that the Watcher’s were under attack. Having their support would mean a great deal of difference to our cause.”

“Not too mention the fact you would finally be able to show up the guys that never invited you to their secret meetings?” Buffy asked him.

“Well, yes there is that.” Giles answered with a small smile.

“Lead on, Giles.” Buffy briefly thought about finding Spike and letting him know where she was going, but then she realized there was no way Giles was going to let her go at this point.

She followed Giles out of the ballroom and down the hallway to the Library.

Giles paused before they entered. “Buffy, do try and polite.”

“I’ll try, but I still think they are scary and horrible.”

As they entered the library every hair on the back of Buffy’s neck stood up. She went on immediate alert.

None of the Watcher’s that had joined the school ever made Buffy feel like this. The men before her watched her closely as if she were a lab rat.

“Hello Miss Summers. So nice to finally meet the legend.” A small distinguished looking Indian man gestured for her to sit across from him at a table. Standing behind him were two younger Indian gentlemen, who Buffy assumed to be his body guards.

“Buffy, this is Mr. Isaac Milton. His family has been with the Council for almost 250 years now.”

“I guess that save on those ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ questions?” Buffy said, not sure how else to respond to that. Mr. Milton didn’t seem to be too offended. He just laughed.

“Quite. Please do sit down.” Again he gestured to the chair. Buffy smiled and eased uncomfortably into the chair indicated.

“So you are the Oldest Slayer on record. Are you teaching your techniques here at the school now?” He asked her.

“Um, no, I’m really not doing anything here with the school. I’m kind of taking a break from the whole ‘Slaying’ gig.”

“I would think your expertise would be invaluable to these young girls.” He pressed her.

“Possibly, but Faith is more than capable of teaching them. She is actually much better at dealing with the girls than I am.”

“So you are going to school, then, learning some sort of skill?”

“I tried a couple of different types of schools. I didn’t do so well there. I had trouble relating to your typical college student.” Buffy kind of shrugged and looked embarrassed.

“I see. Well then, Miss Summers do you have any plans for the future? Or is the Council just going to support you for the rest of your retirement.”

“Mr. Milton, I assure you the Council is not just supporting Buffy. She has made great contributions to this school. And lets not forget that without her there wouldn’t even have been a school.” Giles interrupted trying to stick up for Buffy.

“Actually,” Buffy spoke up hesitantly. “I was thinking about traveling. Giles was always telling me about the different fighting styles there are around the world. I was hoping I could go train in some different places and see the world.”

For the first time he regarded her with something other than bored disinterest.

“So this ‘break’ you are taking? You are planning to continue on with your training?”

“Sure, training, sight seeing, shopping.”

Mr. Milton chuckled dryly. “Are you planning on taking your vampire with you when you go?”

“If you can’t even be bothered to call him by his name I don’t see what business it is of yours.” Buffy’s voice immediately got cold.

“Really? The most experienced Slayer the world has known, running off with the only vampire to ever kill two Slayers, isn’t my business?
Go ask Mr. Finn, Miss Summers, if the American Government would let its best CIA agent just disappear with a member of the KGB.”

“Ok. Newsflash. We aren’t the government and you chose not to be a part of our Watcher‘s Council, so I don‘t have to tell you anything.”


“You are right, you don’t. Well then, Miss Summers, as I said earlier, it was nice to finally meet you. I don’t want to keep you any longer.”

Buffy and Milton stared each other down, before she nodded her head. “Fine. Giles, I’m sorry, I tried.” With that Buffy walked out of the library.


Mr. Isaac Milton turned to look at Giles. “Sit down Rupert, we need to have a chat.”