Prologue
Sunnydale, May 2002

“If you wanted to hurt Buffy. Congratulations. It worked.”
She walked out, closed the door carefully. She didn’t even slam it. That he could have taken, anger he’s good at. But not this, not the silent dissapointment. It was just too much.

He got up, stared pacing the crypt. He had to get out of here, had to do something... He left the crypt and found his motorcycle in an alley close to the cemetery. On the way he stopped at Willy’s. He found Clem in the poker room.

“Spike! Wanna join the game?” Clem asked Spike.

“No, I’m leaving town for a while. Could you stay at my place while I’m gone? Don’t wanna lose it.” He asked his best friend.

“Sure, no problem. Where you going?”

“Don’t know... away.” he answered.

“Oh... that Slayer of yours again, huh? She’s a great girl, don’t get me wrong, but...” seeing the look Spike gave him, Clem hurried to change the subject. “So, when you gonna be back?”

“Don’t know that either. Not for a while... there’s something else... could you give this to Buffy when you see her?” He handed Clem an envelope. “See you when I get back.” Spike turned and left the bar before Cem could get another workd in.

*****

“Mmm...Xander!” Willow pulled away from Tara.

“OK, not quite the response I was fishing for.”

“No, he’s here.” Tara turned from the window and smiled at Willow.

“Think they’re making up?” Willow peeked through the window.

“I hope so that’s the best...” Tara was interrupted by Anya who suddenly appeared in the room. “...part. What are you doing here?”

“Damn.” Anya looked around. “I must be out of shape. I was aiming for the garden.” She started out the door and down the stairs. Willow and Tara followed.

“Wait.” Willow caught Anya by the shoulder. “What’s going on?”

“Don’t you feel it? There’s so much vengeance in the air, I’d think even you would notice.” She continued down the stair.

“What are you talking about?” Tara and Willow caught up with her below the stairs.

“Someone’s headed this way, and he’s got a bad case of vengeance going. Something’s gonna happen, I just don’t know what, and I have to warn them.” At that moment they heard gunshots from the garden.

*****

“Oh God. Buffy?” Xander was kneeling by Buffy on the ground when the three women got into the garden. “Oh God... oh God... Buffy?”

“Xander, what happened?” Willow rushed to his side and pressed the sweater she’d been holding in her hand against the bullet wound in Buffy’s upper left chest.

“It... it was that guy, Warren. He... he was yelling about... I don’t know, and then the next moment, he... he had a gun and he... oh God!”

Tara ran back into the house and emerged about a minute later.

“An ambulance is on it’s way. And the police too. Where’s Anya?”

Willow looked around. Neither of them had noticed Anya leave. When her eyes reached the hole in the hedge, Anya was coming through it with Warren in front of her.

“Look what I found!” Anya pushed Warren to the ground and pointed the gun at him. “Don’t even think about getting up. I know how to use this and I will if I have to.” Warren seemed to take her seriously, because he didn’t even move. Everybody turned their attention back to Buffy, who had now closed her eyes on the ground.

“Where is that damn ambulance?” Xander was feeling helpless and didn’t know what to do. He held Buffy’s hand and kept track of her pulse with one of his fingers.

That very moment, they heard sirens approaching and Tara went around the house to lead the ambulance personnel right. Less than a minute later she came back into the back yard followed by four men, two paramedics with a stretcher and two police officers. The police men went up to Warren sitting on the grass and started reading him his rights while putting hand cuffs on him. The paramedics put the stretcher down next to Buffy and started checking her injuries.

“We need to get her to the hospital. Now.” One of the men said, the other nodding in agreement. They lifted Buffy onto the stretcher and started rolling it to the ambulance while the policemen took Warren to their car. Xander followed.

“I’m gonna go with her. You can take my car.” He tossed the keys to Willow, who caught them with one hand.

“We’ll pick up Dawn on the way.” Willow caught the keys.

“Dawn. God, I completely forgot.” Xander ran his hands over his face, as he got in the back of the ambulance. “OK. You get her, just hurry.” One of the paramedics closed the doors behind him and in a couple of seconds, the ambulance was heading for the hospital, sirens wailing.

*****

Willow, Tara, Anya and Dawn came bursting through the doors to the waiting room and looked around for Xander. He was sitting in one of the chairs on the right wall, staring into space.

“Hey.” Willow smiled at him. “Any news?”

“No. They’re still working on her. Wouldn’t even tell me what’s going on.” He looked up at Dawn, who had a hard time holding back the tears. “Hey, it’s gonna be OK.”

“You don’t know that. That’s what they said about mom and look what happened.” She sat down next to Xander and he put his arm around her shoulder.

“This is completely different, you know. Slayer healing and all.”
At that moment a doctor came into the waiting room and both Dawn and Xander stood up.

“Doctor? Any news?”
The doctor walked up to the group. Nothing could be read from his expression.

“I’m very sorry. There was nothing we could do, the damage was just too much.” The doctor said.

Dawn was the first to understand the doctor’s words. She sat back down and started to cry silently. Willow turned to Tara who pulled er close as they both cried. Anya looked devastated, and turned away from everyone. Xander was the last to understand. Slowly, he sat back down not realizing what was really happening. Then the world finally caught up with him and tears started down his cheeks.

*****

They went back to the Summer’s house after a while, since they couldn’t stay at the hospital. Nobody wanted to be alone. They stayed down in the living room, someone turned on the TV but nobody really watched it. After a couple of hours, Xander ordered pizza, mostly to get Dawn to eat something.

They gathered around the island in the kitchen, eating in silence. They hadn’t said a word to each other since the hospital. Dawn was the first to speak.

“I want to go see Spike. I should tell him... he would want to know.”

“Dawn... not now, please.” Xander put down the slice of pizza he just picked up. “Can we just leave him out of this?”
“Why? He doesn’t deserve to know because of what happened at the Magic Box?” Dawn looked at Anya for a second, then turned back to Xander. “He loves... loved her. You know that.” Nobody said anything.

“Fine. I’ll go by myself.” She got up and left the kitchen. Tara went after her.

“I’ll go with you. If that’s OK.” Tara said to Dawn.

“Thank you.” Dawn gave her a hug and opened the front door.

*****

When they got to Spike’s crypt Dawn hesitated with a hand on the door.

“I don’t know how to tell him...he’ll be...”

“I know.” Tara took a step forward. “Do you want me to?” She asked.

“No. I should. Could you wait out here?” Tara nodded. Dawn opened the door and entered the dark crypt.

“Spike?” But the one inside the crypt wasn’t Spike. It was Clem. “Oh. Hi.”

“Hey there. You looking for Spike?” Clem asked Dawn.

“Yeah. You know where he is?”

“He kinda left town. Last night. I’m watching this place till he gets back.” Clem responded unaware of the pain he was causing Dawn by saying this.

“Do you know when he’ll be back?” Dawn looked around the crypt.

“No. Wait a sec. You’re the Slayer’s sister, right?” Clem asked.

“Yes.” She responded.

“Could you give her something? Spike asked me to give her this letter, or something, and I’m not sure I’ll see her, so...” Clem gave Dawn the envelope that Spike had given him. Dawn took it and looked at it. Then tears started to run down her face again.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did I do something?” Clem looked at her, not sure how to react to her tears.

“No, it’s not you...” Dawn pulled herself together and dried her eyes. “It’s just... Buffy... she... she died earlier today...” The tears started again, and she wasn’t even trying to hold back. She heard the door to the crypt open and the second later she was pulled into a tight embrace by Tara.

“He’s not here!” She sobbed against Tara’s chest. “He-he-he left... left town... why did he go?”

“I don’t know Dawnie, I’m sorry.” Tara started pullig Dawn out of the crypt, half carrying her back to the house, leaving a confused Clem behind. When they got there, she led Dawn to the couch in the living room. Everybody gathered around them, questioning looks on their faces.

“He wasn’t there.” Tara explained.

“He left town. Last night. Just like that...” The words were only whispers, but everybody understood what Dawn said.

“What’s that?” Xander indicated the envelope that Dawn still had clutched in her hand. She let go of it and it fell to the floor. Xander picked it up and opened it.

“Dear Buffy.
I’ll be gone when you get this. Don’t ask me where, or why, or even how, ‘cause I don’t know. All I know is I can’t stay here. I can’t stand to see that look on your face, the one you had the other night, and know that it’s my fault. Please believe that this is not what I wanted, never this. All I ever wanted was you, to be the kind of man you could be proud of. That will never happen. So I’m going, hopefully I’ll figure out where before I get there. But if you never believed anything I said, believe this; I will be back.
Love,
William”

Africa, May 2002

“You have endured the required trials.” A voice sounded through the cave.

“Bloody right I have.” Spike pushed himself off the ground. “So give me what I want. Make me what I was...so Buffy can get what she deserves. “

“Very well. We will return you to what you once were.” A blue light surged through the cave and Spike screamed in pain.

Chapter one


Sunnydale, October 2002


He was home. Sunnydale. Finally. Spike breathed in the air and raised his face to the sun. He would never get sick of this. He had forgotten how good it could feel to just stand in the sun and let it touch your face. After all, it had been 120 years since last time, not counting that little adventure with the Gem of Amara. Which made him think of Buffy. Although, that didn’t say much, since everything made him think of Buffy. She was everywhere. He opened the door to his crypt and went inside.

“Clem? You there?” No answer. He was probably out playing kitten poker or something. Didn’t matter. He wasn’t the one Spike wanted to see right now.

He left the crypt again and was about to head for the street when a familiar voice reached him. He turned and saw a girl kneeling at a grave about ten feet from the crypt. It was Dawn.

*****

Dawn touched the tomb stone before putting the flowers in the vase.

“Hi.” She said, sure that wherever she was, Buffy was listening.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been by this week. It’s all been so hectic. School’s picking up, a lot of tests and papers and stuff. You know what sophomore year is like.”

She laughed a little. “And Giles brought that Slayer girl a couple of days ago. Her name’s Kennedy, she seems OK. She’s obviously gay, hitting on Willow all the time. Not that that’s gonna get her anywhere. Willow and Tara are happy. Willow’s started talking about med school. She’s graduating in the spring, you know. I think she would make a great doctor. Xander and Anya got back from their honeymoon yesterday. I’m so glad they finally got back together, and they seem so happy. I wish you could’ve been at the wedding. It was beautiful.”

*****

Spike watched her for a while, listening to every word. Did Joyce’s grave use to be here? He did’t think so, but maybe...he took a step closer to Dawn, not wanting to disturb her, but she obviously heard him, because she stopped talking and turned her head to see who was behind her.

“Spike? Oh my God!” She got up and threw herself at him, almost knocking him off his feet. “Where have you been? I’ve missed you so much!”

“Dawn... you’re squeezing me kinda hard there... could you let go, just a little?” He pulled back a little from her.

She let him go, took a step back and stared at him. Something was different...

“You talking to your Mum?” He asked.

Oh, God...she thought. He doesn’t know.

“Ehhh, yeah. Let’s go somewhere else, OK?” She started pulling him away from the grave, not wanting him to find out that way, but he didn’t move.

“I don’t remember her grave being here, though...” He took a step closer to the tomb stone, trying to make out the inscription. “Who were you talking to?”

“No-one.” She tried to pull him away from the grave, but he shook her off and took a few steps closer. And stopped dead in his tracks.

“No.... no.... it’s not... is it? Dawn, say it’s not, please!” But she didn’t say anything, and he knew, somewhere deep down, that there was nothing she could say. He dropped to his knees next to the tomb stone, not being able to hold his own weight. He hadn’t thought that anything could ever hurt more than it had to see her lying on the concrete ground under Glory’s tower, trying to tell himself that she was OK, just sleeping, but knowing that she wasn’t. He had been wrong. He let his eyes run over the tomb stone, taking in the words but not really seeing them.

Buffy Anne Summers
1981-2002
Devoted friend
Beloved sister and daughter
Love

He traced her name with his fingers, then the last word “love”. They had let him be a part of this one, not like the last. He smiled through the tears.

“I chose the text.” He heard Dawn behind him. “Xander put up a fight, of course, but the others agreed with me. Even Giles.” She was right behind him now. “I think she would have wanted it there...”

He didn’t hear her, the entire world had fallen away around him, and all that was left was the pain. He sat there for what seemed like an eternity. He went over every single memory he had of her, the good and the bad, moments of pain and moments of pleasure. When he got to the last time he’d seen her, that night outside the Magic Box, he touched the stone once again.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered the words so only Buffy could hear, they were for her alone. Then he got up and turned to Dawn. She had tears in her eyes too.

“It’s been five months today. Last time she was back by now. She’s not coming back this time. I know that. I just can’t help but hope, you know?” She looked him in the eyes and smiled. “Hey. I just realized, it’s daylight and you’re not a pile of dust. What did you do?”

They started walking from the grave, trying to get into some sort of normal behavior.

“I went to Africa, saw a legend, had a wish granted.” He turned back to look at the tomb stone. “If I’d know what had happened... I would have made a different wish.”

“So you’re what? Human?” Dawn opened the gate to the cemetery and walked through it.

“Yeah. Much good it did me.” Spike looked back one last time before following Dawn out onto the street.

They walked in silence for a while, both of them knowing where they were going. When they were a couple of blocks away from the house he asked the question she’d been waiting for.

“What was it? Vampire?”

“No.” She shook her head.

“Demon?”

“No. You remember that robot guy, Warren? He wanted to get back at Buffy for stopping his little bank robbery, so he got a gun and he...” She couldn’t finish the sentence. “Buffy and Xander were in the backyard when he...”

“Where is he now?” Spike’s words were little more than an animal growl, and Dawn knew what he was thinking.

“He’s in prison. Life without any possibility of parole, thanks to the Watcher’s Council...” She glanced at him. “Please don’t.”

“Don’t what?”

“You know what I mean... don’t go looking for him, don’t get yourself killed trying to kill him. You’re not immortal anymore, and I can’t loose anyone else right now. Please?” He could hear the pain in her voice, and it somehow lessened his anger.

“I won’t. Just wish... I’d have been there, you know?”

“I know. Me too.”

They had reached the front door of the Summers house now, and Dawn opened it. Voices were heard from the kitchen.

“It seems like everyone’s here.” Dawn headed for the kitchen. Spike hesitated in the doorway. Dawn turned back. “Well, come on.” He followed her through the house.

*****

Willow, Tara, Giles, Xander and Anya were in the kitchen, arguing about dinner. Nobody wanted to cook, and they couldn’t agree on what to order. By the time Dawn ana Spike entered the kitchen they had the choices down to pizza or Chinese.

“Hey, Dawn, help us out here. We can’t decide whether to get pizza or...” Xander turned and saw Spike. “... Spike...”

“No, Xander. Pizza or Chinese not...” Anya turned around too. “... Spike? What are you doing here? And where’s your blanket?”

“My what?” Spike gave Anya a confused look.

“Blanket. You know, with the sun.”

“Oh. Don’t need it anymore.” He wasn’t in the mood to explain.

“I found him at the cemetery. In daylight!” Dawn was pouring orange juice in a glass.

“Daylight? Hello, vampire. That’s not possible.” It was Willows turn to look confused. Tara was the first to understand.

“You’re human? How?”

When Spike seemed to ignore the question, Dawn explained.

“He went to see some demon in Africa and kinda won it back.” Dawn took a sip of her juice. Spike couldn’t take everyone staring at him, so he went into the living room. The gang in the kitchen stared after him.

“I think he wants to be alone.” Dawn looked down on the table. “He... he saw the grave. He took it pretty hard.”

“Dear Lord.” For the first time since Dawn and Spike had come in the house, Giles spoke. “He managed to get his humanity back, for her I presume, and then finds this? I actually feel bad for him... I’m losing my touch.”

“Yes, that must be it. It can’t be just normal humanity, now can it?” Anya got up to get the phone.

“Um, An, honey, forgetting something here? Humanity only applies to humans.”

“Um, Xander, honey, forgetting something here? You heard Dawn. He’s human now, so I’d say that calls for some humanity.”

Xander looked beaten. “I think you should have to have been human for at least a year before you get the benefits. “

“Guys, can we just give him a break?” Dawn looked around at everybody. “He went to Africa and got his humanity. He didn’t tell me exactly how, but I’m guessing he had to do a little more than ask nicely. And now this. “ She paused for a moment. “I want him to stay here.”

“Dawn, you’re not searious, are you?” Xander stared at her. “This is still Spike we’re talking about.”

“No, it’s not, don’t you see that?” Dawn was mad now. “You didn’t see him at the cemetery. It was... I don’t know, I think he kinda tuned out, I couldn’t reach him... he just sat there for over an hour, crying... I’ve never seen him like that before, not even after... Glory.”

“I think it’s a good idea for him to stay here.” Giles surprised everyone when he said that, but no-one disagreed. “I mean, it must be up to the two of you in the end.” He indicated Willow and Tara. “You are the ones who live here, so naturally you will get the last say.”

“I don’t mind having him here.” Tara looked at Willow. “Do you?”

“No. I think he should stay here, at least until he can get, you know, a job and everything. Which might be a little hard, considering he doesn’t have an identity or anything.” Willow gave Tara’s hand a squeeze.

“I think I might be able to do something about that.” Giles took the phone from Anya and dialed number. “Yes, Quentin, hello... Yes I realize it’s the middle of night over there, but I need a favor... Yes...Yes... Quentin, please this is important... Well, it concerns... actually, it concerns William the Bloody... yes, the vampire, but he’s not... Yes, I understand that this is against Council policy, but I’m asking you as a personal favor... He needs papers, and an identity... Because he’s been dead for a hundred and twenty bloody years, what do you think... Great... I’ll get some pictures tomorrow and send them to you... Thank you.” He hung up the phone. “Done.”

“That was fast.” Dawn looked impressed.

“I do still have some contacts, you know. I’m not completely cut off.” Giles put the phone down on the counter.

“He just agreed to do it? Just like that? That doesn’t sound like the Quentin we all know and despise.” Xander picked up the phone and finally ordered the food.

“I’ll need to get some photographs, for the papers. Dawn, maybe you should talk to him first?” Giles nodded against where Spike had disappeared.

“OK.” Dawn got up and left the kitchen. She found Spike upstairs, in Buffy’s old bedroom sitting on the bed. They hadn’t changed anything in there, and she found him holding one of Buffy’s sweaters to his chest.

“Hey.” He twitched when he heard her voice, but didn’t look up.

“Didn’t hear you. What’s going on in the land of the Scoobies?” He put down the sweater on the bed and looked at her.

“You’re staying here. And Giles got that Quentin guy to get you papers, identity stuff you know.” She sat down on the bed next to him.

“Giles? Giles is helping me? The Scoobies OK with this?” Dawn laughed at the disbelief in his voice.

“Sure. Xander wasn’t too pleased, but I think Anya will put him in his place. He’s still upset about... you know...” Dawn looked down.

“Yeah. God, I regret that. That was the last night I... saw her... ever... I didn’t want it to end like that.” He picked up a photo of Buffy and Dawn from the bedside table.

“I think she forgave you. I know everyone else has. Except for Xander, of course.” Dawn got up from the bed. “I just wanted to tell you the good news. The pizza will be here in a little while, if you’re hungry.” She walked out the door. “Oh, and if you want, you can have this room. No-one’s using it, so...”

She turned and went down the stairs, leaving Spike with nothing but memories.

Chapter 2


Sunnydale, November 2002


“You are now the official guardian of Dawn Summers.” Willow declared after turning off the computer.

“Wow. You can do that, just like that?” Dawn looked at the now black computer screen.

“I didn’t really do that much. Quentin already fixed the identity, I just pulled some strings at the Social Services. It was pretty easy.” Willow started unhooking the computer and packing it in its bag. “I’ve actually missed the hacking, never realized that before. It’s fun, feels like I have all this power.”

“Thanks, Red, really appreciate everything you’ve done.” Spike gave Willow a smile of gratitude.

“Don’t worry, what are friends for?” Willow smiled back at him before leaving the room. Spike looked after her. Friend... he’d been called a lot of things...

“So... let’s celebrate!” Dawn jumped to her feet. “Let’s get the others and go to the Bronze!”

“You go ahead, I think I’ll just hang out here, get some sleep.” He got up and started heading for the stairs. “Tired.”

“Spike, come on.” Dawn grabbed him by the arm. “You need to get out. You haven’t left the house, almost not the room, since you got back.”

“I just... it feels wrong to do stuff, to have fun, when she’s not...” He couldn’t force himself to finish the sentence.

“I know.” Dawn gave him a hug. “I felt the same way. But then I remembered what she said before, you know, Glory. She would want us to live, she would hate it if we just stopped having fun and stuff because of her.”

Spike knew she was right, so he gave up. “Fine. I’ll go with you, but that’s it. I’m not making any promises to have fun, got it?”

“Yay! I’m gonna go get changed!” And she was out of the room and up the stairs before he could even blink.


Sunnydale, August 2003


“Are you sure we’ve packed everything?” Willow looked around the almost empty room.

“I’m sure. I’ve double and triple checked, and so did Dawn and Xander, and you. You know we have everything.” Tara picked up the last box in the room and carried it downstairs and out to the moving truck. Willow followed.

Everyone were out in the front yard, just finishing loading up the truck,

“I just feel guilty leaving you all like this.” Willow dragged Dawn into a bone crushing hug.

“Oxygen is a very underrated thing.” Dawn managed to get out.

“Sorry.” Willow let go of Dawn and looked around the group. “You sure you’ll be OK? With money and stuff and... other stuff...”

“Willow, we will be fine!” Dawn let out a sigh. This was about the hundred and fiftieth time Willow had asked that – just today. “I’m not going to drop out of school, Spike has a great job which is WELL PAID, plus, Giles is here, and Xander and Anya. And if we have any real problems...” She caught the horrified look on Willows face. “... which we won’t, we’ll call you. Promise. Chicago is only a couple of hours away with a plane.”

“Willow, we really have to go now. We’ll miss the plane.” Tara took a determined hold on Willows hand and pulled her to the car.

“OK. We’ll call when we get there. Or from the airport. They have phones there, right?” Willow got in the back of the taxi after Tara and closed the door. “Be safe, Dawnie. Don’t... play with matches... or talk to strangers...” The taxi started to pull out from the curb and Willow leaned through the window. “And don’t walk alone after dark...” The last sentence she almost yelled from the departing taxi.

“Well, we should head out. An has a doctors appointment.” Xander gave Dawn a hug before he followed Anya to the car, got in and drove off.

“Yes, I should get going too. Awaiting a very important phone call.” Giles walked down the street, he lived just five minutes away.

Dawn and Spike went into the now quiet house together.

“I’m gonna miss them.” Dawn looked at a photo of Buffy, Xander and Willow from high school that was on the mantelpiece in the living room. Spike followed her glance.

“Me too. Me too.” He gave Dawn a, what he hoped, reassuring smile.


Sunnydale, April 2004


“You’re leaving too?” Dawn looked at Xander with so much disappointment in her eyes that he had too look away.

“I’m sorry, Dawnie. It’s just... with the baby and everything. An and I talked and decided that Sunnydale is nowhere to raise a family. We’re thinking a place with a little less hellmouth under the high school.” He tried to joke, but Dawn didn’t notice. “You’ll be going off to college before you know it. It’s just a little more than a year left.”

“I know...” Dawn was looking forward to leaving Sunnydale, too. This place held too many bad memories.

“We’ll only be three hours away, two if I drive really fast.” Xander tried a smile. Dawn smiled back. “Have you decided which colleges to apply to yet?”

“I’m leaning strongly towards NYU. They have a great journalist program. And I’ve always wanted to see New York. Haven’t decided yet, thought.” Dawn shrugged.

“Yeah. Did you talk to Spike about going?” Xander asked.

“Not yet. But with Kennedy here, and Faith getting out of jail next year, he can leave Sunnydale too, if he wants to. I’d like it if he went with me to New York, if that’s where I end up.” Dawn sighed. “I don’t know if he’ll want to, though. I think he has some... bad memories of New York.”

“You should talk to him.” Xander said “He’ll want to do what’s best for you.”

“I know, and I will.” Dawn gave Xander tearful look. “I’m gonna miss you guys so much. How can I be a good Aunt to little Alex if I’m across the country?”

“We’ll figure it out. Don’t we always?” Xander put an arm around Dawn’s shoulders.


Sunnydale, July 2005


Dawn walked through the now empty house, remembering all the happy – and sad – moments she had had there. Now it was all going to be just a memory. For a split of a second she wondered if she had made the right decision, but pushed the thought aside quickly. She had to live her own life. Buffy would have wanted her to. There was nothing for her here.

She went out on the back porch, where Spike was sitting on the steps, and sat down next to him.

“Taking a stroll down memory lane?” She asked.

“I remember the day I decided to kill her. I got a gun and everything, and then when I got here she was sitting here, right here, and she was crying. I think that’s when I knew nothing would ever be the same.” He looked up and Dawn could see tears in his eyes.

“Are you having second thoughts? Do you wanna stay here? I could always go to Sunny U.”

“No. I said I’d take care of you, and I will. Wherever you wanna go, that’s where we’re going. Gonna show you the world...” He sat silent for a while. “Did you pack the rest? Giles will be here any minute.”

“Yeah, I’m all done. I can’t wait to get to New York. It feels kinda weird, though. Nobody will be left here. Willow and Tara will be in Chicago, Xander and Anya in Silicon Valley, Giles in England and you and me in New York.”

“I know the feeling.” He stared out into the garden, but was really somewhere completely different.

Chapter 3

New York, May 2007

William walked down the street. He always walked home after a double shift at the bar, cleared his mind. He didn’t look at the familiar surroundings, knowing them too well.

Everything was different. A lot of things had happened since he and Dawn moved to the Big Apple almost two years ago.

Dawn was doing great at NYU. She had gotten straight A:s throughout the first three semesters and was heading for a fourth in the same spirit. She loved being a journalism major. And she had found a guy. He hadn’t met him yet, actually she hadn’t said anything yet, but he knew. She was happy in a way he hadn’t seen before, and it made him happy too. That was the only happiness he got these days.

The rest of the Scoobies were doing well. Willow had graduated from medschool a couple of weeks earlier, and she and Tara had relocated back to sunny California, but not Sunnydale, instead they had decided on San Francisco. He understood their decision, he had always loved Frisco himself.

Xander and Anya were still living in Silicon Valley where, apparently, the market was good for a new building company. Little Alex was three now and they were expecting their second child in September. Giles was still in the mothercountry, enjoying a high position within the Watcher’s Council and, if you should believe Dawn, a girlfriend.

And what had he accomplished? When they moved to New York, he had decided to drop the nickname, and everybody knew him as Will. Only Dawn called him Spike sometimes, usually when she was really mad at him. He had also lost some of the accent and the style. At least the clothes. He hadn’t worn the duster since that day at the cemetery, it was stored away in a closet. These days he dressed in t-shirts, jeans and boots. Dawn had almost had a heart attack when he had walked into the apartment one day with brown hair, and told him that she would move out unless he changed it back. He believed her, so he did. He liked it better that way,too. He was working as a bartender at a bar in the Village, where he and Dawn lived in a three bedroom apartment. Giles had helped them to pay for the apartment, and with the salary that he made at the bar, they could live a pretty good life.

Of course, there was something missing. Buffy. The thought came to him as naturally as it always did. He hadn’t been with anyone since that night with Anya. Dawn had tried to set him up with some girls from NYU, but he usually called the date of after a couple of hours, making up all sorts of excuses to get away from there. Because none of them were her. She had been gone for five years now, and he knew that he was always going to miss her as desperately as he did that afternoon at the cemetery.

Will stopped on the sidewalk. He could feel the tears on his face, and he didn’t want to go home like that, in case Dawn was still awake. He turned his face to the sky and tried to make out the stars. You could hardly see them here in the city, but at least he could find the North Star.

“Mister, can you spare some change?” He heard from a shadowy part of the sidewalk.

He looked down to see the person, a girl, that had made the request. And almost had a heart attack.

“Buffy? Is it you?” His voice was weak and little more than a whisper. But she had heard him.

“Buffy? I don’t know no Buffy. Why did you call me that?” She gave him a frightened look.

“I’m sorry, I... I though you were somebody else. What’s you’re name?” He looked more closely at the girl.

“Joan. I’m Joan.” She looked away from his piercing stare.

Will smiled at the memory. Joan and Randy. Was it really her? But how was it possible? Not that he cared, the only thing that mattered was that it was her, he was sure of it. Even if she seemed to not remember him, or her life.

“I’m Will. Would you like a place to stay for a couple of days?” He could tell that he had scared her with his offer.

“Don’t worry, I’m not trying to hurt you. I don’t live alone, my little sister lives there too. Really, I’m not a bad guy.” He reached out a hand. To his, and her own, surprise, she took it and let him help her stand up. Why did she trust him?
Did she remember? But no, the look on her face was still blank.

They walked the last couple of blocks to his and Dawn’s apartment in silence. He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t want to scare her off.

When they got to the apartment, he showed her the spare bedroom and the bathroom, and gave her some towels, a T-shirt and some sweats of Dawns. She went into the bathroom to take a shower, something that he had a feeling she hadn’t done in a while.

While she was in the shower, Dawn came into the kitchen where he was sitting.

“Hey. Who’s in the shower?” She asked sleepy.

“Ehh... look Dawn, don’t freak. And I’m not making this up. When I was walking home, a homeless girl asked me for some money.” He could see the disbelief on her face.

“And you took her home with you? Why not a kitten? Or a puppy?” Dawn sat down at the kitchen table.

“Dawn, just listen to me. I didn’t take her home, just like that. I... I think it’s Buffy.” He looked at Dawn, who stared at him, tears in her eyes.

“Don’t do this, Spike. Please. I’ve spent too much time hoping that she might come back. I can’t take this.” She got up and was about to leave the kitchen when he grabbed her by the arm.

“Dawn, I’m sure it’s her. But she doesn’t seem to remember me, or her life. But she did say her name was Joan.” He saw realization hit her.

“The memory spell...” She sat back down at the table.

“Yeah. Look, I just meet her, and if you want, I’ll send her out tomorrow morning. OK?” Will caught Dawn’s eyes.

“OK.” She nodded

At that moment, Buffy/Joan came out from the bathroom. When Dawn saw her, she felt tears form in her eyes. It was her.

“Joan, I’d like you to meet my little sister Dawn.” Will introduced. Dawn took a few careful steps towards her.

“Hi.” Dawn smiled at Joan.

“Dawn... I think I knew someone named Dawn once...” Buffy/Joan looked like she was trying to remember something, but failed. “It’s nice to meet you, and it’s very nice of you and your brother to let me stay here. Thank you.”

“No problem. I’m just gonna head off to bed again, got an early class tomorrow. Sleep tight.” Dawn turned and went back to her room, giving Will one last look before she left the kitchen.

“I’m gonna crash too. You need anything, my room’s right across the hall from yours, OK?” Will got up from the chair and started walking towards his bedroom. Joan followed him. Outside the bedrooms, they stopped for a minute.

“I want to thank you too. I haven’t slept in a real bed since... I don’t even remember. Thank you.” Joan smiled at him before disappearing into the spare bedroom.

“You’re welcome.” Will whispered before going into his own, leaving the door open just a little, so that he would hear her if she needed anything.

*****

If he had thought that he would be able to sleep with Buffy – or Joan – a few feet away, he had been terribly wrong. Will looked at his alarm clock for the fiftieth time. 2.30 A.M. He thanked a higher power that he didn’t start working until 5 P.M. Giving up on sleep, at least at the moment, he got out of bed and went into the kitchen to get something to eat.

He had just made himself a sandwich and poured a glass of milk when he heard a muffled cry coming from Buffy/Joan’s bedroom. He got up and went over to the door, trying to hear what was going on. It was quiet now, and after a minute he started going back into the kitchen.

“No... no... please... no...” At the sound, he rushed back to the door and opened it, finding Buffy/Joan in the bed, tossing in her sleep, crying. He sat down on the bed next to her and shook her lightly.

“Bu... Joan! Wake up, it’s just a nightmare.”

She opened her eyes, and he saw recognition in them.

“Spike?” Her voice was little more than a whisper, but it hit him like she had yelled it. He put his arms around her and pulled her in close, rocking her slowly as she snuggled up against his chest.

“God, Buffy, I’ve missed you so much, you have no idea. When I saw you tonight, I couldn’t believe it... but it’s really you. I’m so sorry for everything, and I’ve missed you so, so much, Buffy.” At the last word he could feel her freeze in his arms. She pulled away.

“Why did you call me that again? I told you – my name is Joan.” She pulled the covers up around her, trying to shield herself from him, and he felt like someone had put a knife through his heart. He got off the bed and stepped back from her.

“I’m sorry, I thought you were... someone else for a while there... must have been a dream.” He had to fight very hard to keep the tears away. It had been her, really her, and he had messed it up. Lost her again.

“OK... why are you in my room?” She gave him a confused look.

“I heard you crying, thought you had a bad dream... I’ll leave now... sorry.” He walked out of the room and back into his own, completely forgetting about the sandwich in the kitchen.

*****

“Goodnight Dawn, Will.” Buffy left the livingroom where Will and Dawn were watching a movie. Will looked after her.

“t’s not her, Spike.” Will twitched at Dawn using his old nickname. “Not anymore. It may look like her, but she’s not in there. You know that too.”

“Yeah. I just can’t... help but hope.” He turned the DVD of when the credits started rolling over the TV-screen.

“I know. I do too, sometimes. But then I remember...” Dawn got up and stretched. “Well, I’m off to bed, see you tomorrow.” She walked down the hall into her room.

Will turned the TV off as well before going down the hall to his bedroom. He stopped for a moment outside Buffy/Joan’s room, listening to her soft breaths through the door. When he got into his room he closed the door and pulled his shirt, boots and jeans off before going into the bathroom. When he got back into the bedroom after brushing his teeth, he could hear cries from the room across the hall. He quickly made his way into Buffy’s bedroom, where she was turning in bed, crying, just like the night before. He shook her gently, trying to wake her up. She opened her eyes and looked at him with tears in them before pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Please don’t leave me. I’ve missed you so much. I don’t wanna go back, please don’t let me.” He could feel her tears on his bare chest, and he stroke her hair, trying to comfort her without knowing what to say.

They sat like that for about ten minutes before she pulled back, just like the night before, looking at him with confusion in her eyes.

“Sorry, Joan. Bad dream... I’ll let you sleep.” Will got off the bed and started for the door, when a small hand held him back. He turned to look at her.

“I don’t know why... but you make me feel safe. Could you stay with me tonight? Just... sleep?” She looked at him, pleading, and he got back on the bed, lying on top of the covers to keep from getting too close to her, both for her sake and for his own. She snuggled up against him, and he put his arm around her, his arm coming to rest upon her neck. She let out a sigh of contentment and within a minute she was asleep again, while Will was wide awake by her side.

Chapter 4

New York, July 2007

Will was sitting in the armchair in Buffy’s bedroom, waiting for her nightmare to start. It had been two months since he had found her on the street, and every night since then he had comforted her from the dream in the middle of the night, being rewarded with a little while of having Buffy, the real Buffy, there with him. The first couple of times had only been a few minutes, but after two weeks or so she had been ‘awake’ for a full hour, and the last few weeks he had had her for almost three. They spent the time talking at first, she told him about what had happened since she had ‘died’ in Sunnydale, how she had woken up on the sidewalk where he had found her, not remembering anything.

He told her about the lives of her loved ones, about Xander, Anya, Willow, Tara, Giles and Dawn. Two weeks earlier she had asked him about the heartbeat and bodyheat and he had told her about his journey to Africa and the humanity. After he finished she had been quiet for a long time before pulling him in close and kissing him. That had been their first kiss since he found her, and after that they had spent less and less time talking and more and more time kissing and touching, discovering each others bodies once again. Several times he had been forced to pull away, afraid that if they went to far, it might destroy everything they had accomplished in the past two months.

Like he had said to her last night, when she had complained about him stopping her from taking it one step further, he’d rather have her for a few hours every night than not at all. She’d said that she understood, but that she didn’t like it.

Will was pulled out of his day, or more of night, dream by Buffy’s soft cries. He went over to the bed and gently woke her. Her lips immediately met his for a long kiss while she pulled him down onto the bed until he was lying on top of her. He let the rest of the world fall away as they kissed, knowing too well that he would have to break the magic soon. Her hands wandered over his back, but when she started tugging his t-shirt to get it off, he pulled back. She looked at him with tears in her eyes, and it hurt him. He pulled her into his arms and rocked them both back and forth on the bed while she cried at the injustice of the world. After a little while she pulled back, wiping her eyes.

“How’s Dawn?” She asked.

“She’s fine. She’s counting the days til school starts again. And that guy, David or something, took her to a movie tonight. I think she likes him.” They had decided not to tell Dawn about what was going on, so that she wouldn’t get her hopes up and be disappointed if it stopped happening. None of the others knew either, they didn’t even know about ‘Joan’.

“I wish I could tell her how much I love her.” Tears started glistening in Buffy’s eyes again, but she didn’t let them flow. “I hate this. I really hate it. I can’t see my sister, my friends, I can’t do what I want. I’m like a prisoner in my own mind and I hate it.”

She got up and started pacing the room. He let her, and after a couple of minutes she came back to the bed and they got under the covers together.

They lay there for a while, before she started talking again.

“I think I’m stuck.” She turned in the bed to face him.

“Stuck, how?” He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

“Stuck in time. OK, that didn’t sound right. It’s just, for the first couple of weeks, I was here, you know here here, for longer each night, right?”

“Yeah.” He nodded.

“Well, for how long have I been here here for three hours? Three, four weeks? I’m not getting anywhere anymore. It’s like I’m stuck. Am I making any sense?” She frowned.

“Of course you’re making sense.” He gave her a reassuring smile.

“Well... I think we need to do something to get past this.” She looked away, blushing a little.

“What do you mean?” He caught her eyes again,

“I think I need... a push to get past this obstacle. Maybe if we... you know... maybe I would be able to stay.” He pulled away from her and sat up in the bed.

“I don’t know if that’s such a great idea.” He ran his fingers through his hair.

Buffy sat up next to him.

“Why not?” She gave him her puppy eyes.

“Well, to just take one example. What if, you know, right in the middle, you go back to Joan? You would freak out and kick me out of here, and we could loose all of this.” He stood up to get a little distance between them, not trusting his body around her.

“I don’t think that would happen. And even if it did, I don’t think I would ‘freak out’. Joan likes you too. Plus, I’ve been here for, what, half an hour now. We still have at least two hours left.” She took his hand and pulled him back onto the bed.

Will looked at her. God, those eyes were impossible to resist.

”Are you sure?” She nodded. “Completely sure?” She nodded again. “Absolutely, completely...” She shut him up with a kiss that took his breath away. Hear arms came up to circle around his neck as she pulled him with her down on to the bed again.

*****

Will woke up to the smell of coffee. His arm reached out to where Buffy had been when they went to sleep and found the empty bed. He sat up straight. She was gone. He messed up. He got out of the bed and put his jeans and boots on. He had to find her, get her back, he didn’t know how, but he had to do it somehow. Pulling his T-shirt over his head he walked out into the hallway and proceeded to the front door, calling into the kitchen.

“Dawn, I have to run out for a couple of minutes, I’ll be back soon.” His hand was on the doorknob when he felt two small arms wrapping themselves around him.

“Shhh, Dawn’s still asleep.” He turned to face Buffy and his heart almost stopped.

“Is it you, really?”

“Yep. All me. I think we lost Joan for good last night. See, I told you it would work.” He didn’t listen to what she said, just stared at her in disbelief for a moment before putting his arms around her, lifting her in the air and starting to spin her around, holding her as close as he could. After a couple of minutes she started complaining.

“OK, oxygen is becoming an issue now.” He put her down but didn’t let go of her completely as they walked into the kitchen.

“I thought I’d lost you again. I felt like I was gonna die when I woke up and you were gone.” She gave him a quick kiss.

“I’m sorry. I just got so hungry, I decided to start breakfast. Sit!” She pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and he obliged. She went over to the coffeemaker and poured two cups of coffee, placing one in front of him.

“You want pancakes or eggs?” He just stared at her. “Hello, Earth to Spike. Pancakes or eggs?” He snapped out of his trance.

“Eggs sounds great.” He followed her with his eyes as she moved around the kitchen.

“Coming right up.” She put some scrambled eggs on his plate and a couple of pancakes on another and joined him at the table.

“What time is Dawn getting up?” She took a sip of her coffee.

“Hard to know. Some days she sleeps til noon, others she’s up at first light. Why?” He watched her pour syrup over her pancakes.

“I just want to tell her the good news. She’ll be happy, right?” Will reached out a hand and pulled her off of her own chair and into his lap.

“Of course she will. She’s your sister, she loves you.” She rested her head on his shoulder.

“I know, it’s just... she’s got this great life now; school, friends, you... I’m just not sure I fit in.” He could hear the insecurity in her voice.

“Anywhere that I am, you fit in, OK? Get that? I lost you twice already, and I don’t think that ‘third times a charm’ applies in this case.” She nodded, but he could see that she still had doubts. “Hey. I love you. Dawn loves you, and so do Willow and Tara and Xander and Anya and Giles. They will all be thrilled when they find out you’re back, OK? Don’t even think anything else.”

“But what if she’s mad?” She looked at him.

“What if who’s mad?” Dawn walked into the kitchen and quickly turned to leave again. “Sorry, didn’t know you two had gotten all cozy.”

“Dawn.” Will called her back into the kitchen. Buffy moved back to her own chair. “We need to talk to you.”

“Hey, I’m OK with this. No need to ask my permission or anything.” She sat down on the last chair at the kitchen table. “Really, I’m fine with you two being... whatever you are. Why would I be mad?”

“That’s not what we thought you might be mad about.” Will looked at Buffy.

“You wanna tell her?” Buffy nodded.

“Tell me what? What’s going on here?”

“Dawnie...” Dawn stared at Buffy.

“Don’t call me that. My sister called me that, and you’re not her.” She got up from the table and left the kitchen. Buffy followed her into the livingroom, gesturing to Will to give them a moment alone, so he stayed in the kitchen.

“Dawn... please listen to me.” Buffy sat down on the couch next to Dawn.

“No. My sister is dead!” Dawn felt tears forming in her eyes. Buffy saw them and pulled Dawn into an embrace. She resisted at first, but relaxed after a couple of seconds.

“Dawnie, I know this is hard to believe, but it is me. Really. I’m sorry we didn’t tell you sooner, but Spike...” Dawn pulled away from her.

“His name is Will now. Spike is gone.” Buffy smiled at her sister’s correction.

“I know. I’m still getting used to the name, it’s gonna take a while. I know that it will take some time before you will be able to trust me, and that’s fine. We talked about this last night, and...” Dawn cut her off.

“What do you mean you talked about it? When did you talk?”

“OK, let me start from the beginning. Five years ago, after I got... shot, I woke up on the sidewalk here in New York. I didn’t have any memory of my old life, didn’t know who I was, my name or anything. I lived on that sidewalk for five years until two months ago, when Spike... Will found me. I begged money from people, stole food and slept in abandoned apartments when it was too cold to sleep on the street. I named myself Joan, because it was somehow familiar. I guess my subconscious remembered last time I lost my memory. Remember Willows spell, when we all lost our memories?” Dawn nodded.

“OK. Well, when Spike found me, I didn’t know who he was. But I felt something I didn’t remember ever feeling before. I felt safe. I felt like everything was going to be OK. Believe me, I’ve had offers from guys to sleep at their apartments before, but I’ve never gone home with anyone. At the time I didn’t know why I trusted him, just that I did. So I went with him. That night, I had a nightmare. I was in a garden with a man, talking. All of a sudden there’s another guy there, and he has a gun. I don’t have anytime to react before he pulls the trigger and hits me in the chest. I can feel the life drifting away, and I try to hold on to it, because I don’t want to die. I’m crying, pleading to whoever’s out there to let me come back, not take me yet. That’s when Spike woke me up. And I recognized him. I knew who he was, but only for a minute or two, then I was back in Joans mind, and I didn’t remember anything. The next night was the same, but I was ‘me’, you know, for a little longer. These past weeks I’ve been me for about three hours. Then last night...” She blushed and looked down. Dawn smiled.

“It’s OK, I think I get the idea. Don’t want any details please! I’ve already been scared for life when I was living with Xander and Anya for the summer.”

“OK. Well, we... you know, and when I woke up this morning, I was still me. It’s been about ten hours now, and I’m still here. I think I’m here to stay now.” Buffy looked up at Dawn. “So. Do you believe me?”

“Can I just do a little test, to make sure?”

“OK.” Buffy turned on the couch so she could face Dawn.

“When I was five, what did I think was living under my bed?” Dawn asked.

“The Cookie Monster from the Muppets Show. I never understood why you were so afraid of that thing.” Buffy smiled at the memory. Dawn had made her check under her bed every night, to make sure nothing was under there.

“It was scary! OK. Who was the first guy I had a serious crush on?”

“Oh, please!” Buffy giggled. “That’s easy. Xander.”

“OK. One more... let me think...” Dawn flipped through memories in her head before choosing her last question. “Why didn’t I want to go down in the basement in our house in LA?”

“Because you thought that the washer had teeth and was going to eat you.”

“It’s really you! I’ve missed you soooo much. Don’t ever leave again, promise!” Dawn threw her arms around Buffy and hugged her hard.

“I promise.” Buffy hugged back.

They sat like that when Will came into the room ten minutes later.

“Is it safe yet?” He cautiously peeked around the corner before entering the room.

“Of course it’s safe. Come here, you silly.” Dawn smiled at him with tears in her eyes. He walked up to the couch and was pulled into a group hug. After a couple of minutes, Dawn pulled away.

“I’m still a little mad that you guys didn’t tell me right away. But I understand why you didn’t.”

“You sure? I don’t want you holding a grudge.” Will sat down on the couch and pulled Buffy in close.

“I’m sure. I’m just glad I wasn’t the last to find out. We still have to tell Xander, Anya, Willow, Tara and Giles. Oh my God, they’re gonna be soooo surprised! Can I be there when you tell them?” She was practically jumping up and down on the couch.

“Of course you can.” Buffy smiled at her enthusiasm. “But I wanna do it as soon as possible, and in person. Can we do that?” She looked at Will.

“Sure. Willows birthday is next week, and we all get together for birthdays, so we were going to fly to San Francisco anyway. Xander and Anya were driving up with Alex, and Giles was flying in too. Which reminds me – I should call and make plane reservations.” Will picked up the phone and called the airport.

“All set. We’re flying from JFK at 4.30 P.M. on Monday. The others will already be there then, so we can surprise them all at the same time.” He smiled at Buffy.

“Oh.” Buffy put her head in her hands. Will put his arm around her.

“Don’t be. They are your friends. They’ve missed you just as much as we have, OK? Don’t think like this.”

“Yeah, Buffy, they’re gonna be thrilled.” Dawn gave her a hug too. “And just wait til you see Alex, he’s just soooo cute. You’re gonna love him.” Buffy smiled a little at her.

“I can’t wait.”

Chapter 5


San Francisco, August 2007


Buffy slowly opened the cab door and looked at the small house at the end of the driveway. She stepped out onto the sidewalk at the same moment as Will came around the car to take her hand. Dawn was already heading up the path to the house, but stopped when Buffy hesitated, looking back at her sister and Spike.

“It’s OK. Don’t worry.” Spike whispered to her before they started walking through the front yard, Dawn a couple of feet ahead of them.

“Tara said they would be in the back yard, and that we should leave the bags in the hallway and go back there.” She called over her shoulder, walking up the steps to the porch.

Buffy felt like she was in a dream. In a couple of minutes she was going to see her friends again, and she had no idea what to say or do when she did. She had asked Will and Dawn to explain everything, not sure she would be able to. She had been herself for almost a week now, and each morning she thanked a higher power that she was still there.

Buffy took a deep breath and let Will lead her to the front door while Dawn went around the house. They dropped the bags just inside the door before walking through the house to the living room. It was a beautiful room and french windows led to the garden. The windows were open and Will could feel Buffy squeeze his hand harder as voices came into the house. He squeezed back and gave her an encouraging smile. She smiled back, letting him pull her out into the garden.

“Dawnie, Xander and I wanted to ask you something.” Anya pulled Dawn away from the group hug she had shared with Willow and Tara. “You know that we found out that the baby’s a girl, right? Well, we were thinking about naming her Buffy, but we wanted to ask you first, so you’re OK with it. Are you?” Dawn smiled when she saw Will and Buffy walk into the garden.

“I think I’m the wrong person to ask.” Anya turned to see what she was looking at, and was the first to see Buffy.

“But... what... how...” She gave up trying to find something to say and just reached out a hand to make sure Buffy was real. Buffy smiled and gave her a hug. Anya started crying which caught the attention of the four other people in the garden. Anya pulled back, drying her eyes with the back of her hand.

“Sorry... a little emotional right at the moment. Is it really...” She looked at Dawn and Will for an explanation. The others had gathered around them, all of them hugging Buffy and asking the same questions. Giles came last, and didn’t let Buffy go for a good five minutes. When he did, both he and Buffy had tears running down their faces. When everyone’s attention was back to Dawn and Will, they started explaining.




Epilogue


Southern California, July 2009

Buffy was sitting under a sun umbrella on the beach, rubbing tanning lotion onto her legs while looking at her friends and family in the water. They had all gathered in her and Will’s new house outside of San Diego for the Fourth of July weekend. Dawn had graduated from NYU a couple of weeks earlier and had been offered a job at a paper in LA. She had accepted, and Buffy and Will decided that it was time to return to sunny California. They had both fallen in love with the beautiful beach house after seeing the pictures, and signed the deal without even having been inside it. And they hadn’t been disappointed. The house wasn’t big, but it was enough for them. It had two bedrooms, a large living room, two studies and an amazing deck overlooking the ocean. The kitchen and bathrooms were equipped with the latest technology.

Buffy let her eyes wander over her friends and family. Dawn had brought her new boyfriend, a painter that lived in her new apartment building in LA. He was spinning her around in the water and Buffy could hear her shrieks all the way up to where she was sitting, making her laugh. Willow and Tara were running through the more shallow water, splashing each other and giggling. A few feet up from the water were Giles and five year old Alex, playing with a bucket and shovel, Giles was trying to teach Alex how to build sand castles. Xander and Anya had disappeared about half an hour earlier, and Buffy had no problem imagining what they were up to. These days they took every chance they could to have some alone time together when someone was watching the kids. A little bit out in the water Will was pulling Joyce, who was almost two now, through the waves, making her scream with laughter.

Buffy watched them, a smile on her lips, reminiscing over the past two years. After her reunion with her friends in San Francisco on Willow's birthday, she had gone back to New York with Will and Dawn. Wanting to give them some privacy, Dawn decided to move into a dorm room at the NYU campus. Buffy got a part time job at a small restaurant a few blocks from her and Will's apartment, working nights so she could go back to college and finish her degree. A few weeks earlier she had finally gotten her diploma and she was now a certified counselor.

After the holidays Buffy was going to a few job interviews in the area. Will had already gotten a job, bartending at a popular club in San Diego.

After a little while Will noticed her eyes on him, and he came out of the water and sat down next to her on a towel, letting Joyce run down to join her brother and ‘grandfather’ by the water.

“She’s something, isn’t she?” Buffy smiled at him.

“She wonderful.” He shook the water out of his hair, splashing Buffy in the process.

“She in particular or kids in general?” He shot her a wondering look.

“Why?” He asked suspiciously.

“Oh, nothing. Just thought I should check, I mean, we never talked about it, you know but...”

“What? You mean... you’re...?”

She nodded. “Yep. I mean, I haven’t been to the doctor, but I did two tests. Both positive.” She let out a shriek as he pulled her into his lap, kissing her hungrily. She pulled away for breath.

“So, it’s a good thing, I take it?” He answered her with another kiss that took her breath away once more.