Wish you were here


“Dawn, you gonna get that?” Buffy called after the second ring of the doorbell. Not getting an answer, she sighed and pushed herself up from the chair she had been sitting on, groaning a little when the familiar pain shot through her back. It had been getting worse in the past couple of weeks, and she was still only seven months pregnant. ‘Just two more months to go’ Buffy thought to herself as she walked through the house ‘You’ve made it this far, you can do it’.

As she walked up to the front door, she heard the sound of Dawn’s music from upstairs. The doorbell sounded one more time, and Buffy reached for the doorknob.

“Alright, I’m coming.”

Buffy opened the door and smiled at the man outside before giving him a long hug.

“I thought you weren’t coming for another month at least?” She asked as she stepped aside to let Giles into the house.

“Well, I thought, rather safe than sorry, you know.” Giles followed Buffy into the living room and they sat down on the couch. “You can never be too sure about babies, and I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re here.” Buffy smiled at her former Watcher.

“As I am to be here.” He smiled back, before getting serious again. “Is everything alright? Nothing wrong?”

“Giles, we talked yesterday morning.” Buffy giggled. “Nothing’s happened since then.”

“Just making sure.” Giles gave Buffy an affectionate smile. “I know I’m being a little... overprotective.”

“It’s OK. Thats’s what grandparents are for.” Buffy replied. They both realized what she had said at the same time, and looked at each other.

“Did you just...” Giles started.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to...” Buffy said at the same time, and they both laughed.

“OK, let’s try this again.” Buffy said. “I’ve been thinking a little. It’s not very likely that my dad’ll be around, you know, at all, and with mom gone... I just... I mean, you’ve been like a dad to me for the past six years, and I would really like it if you wanted to be a sort of... surrogate grandfather to my baby. If you want to, of course.”

“Well, of course I want to. I would be honored.” Giles replied. “I just didn’t want to take anything for granted.”

“Take for granted all you want. You are a part of this family whether you like it or not.” Buffy smiled a little before continuing. “So, are you here to stay, or...”

“I’ll be here until the baby is born. Then I’ll have to go back to England for a little while, finish up some business.” Giles said.

“OK. So you’ll stay here, in Sunnydale I mean, after that?” Buffy asked, a little nervous.

“I just closed a deal on a flat yesterday, so I should hope so.” Giles could hardly finish the sentence before Buffy had flung her arms around his neck.

“Thank you.” She mumbled.

They sat like that for a little while, until Buffy pulled back, giving Giles a frightened look.

“I’m scared.” She said in a small voice.

“You don’t have to be. People have babies every day, everything will be fine.” Giles tried to comfort her.

“No, not that.” Buffy shook her head. “Or, well, that too, but more what’s after. What if I’m a horrible mother?”

“You are going to be a wonderful mother. Trust me.” Giles said in earnest.

“How can you know that? I can’t even take care of Dawn, how will I be able to take care of a baby?” Buffy had tears in her eyes.

“You do take care of Dawn, whatever made you think otherwise?” Giles asked, frowning. “Did Dawn say something?”

Buffy shook her head.

“No, she’s been real supportive. Everyone has, actually.”

“Even Xander?” Giles asked, suspiciously.

“Even Xander. He’s actually been the one to help the most.” Buffy laughed. “He’s been the one who have been the subject of my weird cravings, running to the store at every possible hour.” Giles joined in the laugh.

“And how is everything, I mean besides the pregnancy?” Giles asked.

“Good. My boss is really nice, she said I could have six months off with full pay, which is good.” Buffy said.

“And... have you heard anything...” Giles didn’t finish the sentence, but they both knew what he was talking about.

“Not a word. It’s like he’s disappeared off the face of the earth, or something.” Buffy sighed. “At least I know he’s alive... or undead or whatever.”

“How can you be sure?” Giles asked, curious.

“It’s just, I think I would know, if something happened to him, I mean. I feel like there’s this bond between us.” Buffy said, not sure how to explain it.

“I think that is only natural. After all, this child is a part of you as much as it is of Spike.” Giles said.

“You haven’t heard anything either?” Buffy asked and Giles shook his head.

“No, I’m sorry. Every contact I have are keeping their eyes open, but as of now, nothing.” Giles saw the disappointed look on Buffy’s face and decided it was time for a change of subject. “So, how are Willow and Tara’s preparations for the birth coming along?”

“Great. They’re pretty much done, just have a couple of classes left.” Buffy replied.

“Good, good. And you are still planning on doing it here?”

“Yes, Giles.” Buffy knew that Giles wasn’t fond of the idea of a home birth. “Anna, the midwife who teaches the class Willow and Tara are taking, have assured me it’s just as safe as it would be in a hospital. If anything goes wrong, and I’m not saying it will, doctor Harrison said we could call her. Besides, I’m still a little worried.”

“About the baby not being human?” Giles asked.

“Yeah. I know I joke about it, but sometimes it really hits me.” Buffy gave Giles a pleading look. “What if something is wrong with my baby?”

“Nothing is wrong, Buffy, you have to believe that.” Giles put a supportive arm around Buffy’s shoulders. “It’s not good for the baby if you worry all the time.”

“I know.” Buffy sighed and leaned her head against Giles’ shoulder. “Sometimes I just can’t help it.”

“Just try not to think about it.” Giles suggested.

“So, where are you staying? You wanna sleep here?” Buffy asked, and Giles chuckled.

“As comfortable as this couch is, I think I would be better off in a hotel.”

“No, I didn’t mean here. Willow and Tara moved into their new apartment a couple of weeks ago, and we made my old room into the nursery.” Buffy got up and headed for the kitchen, motioning to Giles to follow her. “I moved into mom’s room, and I got some new furniture, so we put my old bed and some other stuff down in the basement.” Buffy opened the basement door and they walked down the stairs. “You can stay here.”

Giles looked around the basement. There was a bed, a desk and dresser and even a rug on the floor.

“Besides, I’d be more comfortable if I knew you were in the same house.” Buffy said.

“Then of course I’ll stay.”

*****

Buffy was woken by a sharp pain in her lower back and stomach. She knew that it was possible that it was just false labor, and that even if it wasn’t there was no rush, so she decided to go back to sleep after glancing at the clock on her bedside table. 12.05 A.M.

A couple of hours later, another wave of pain woke her. When the pain was gone, Buffy realized she needed to go to the bathroom. Just as she sat down, she felt a rush of fluid leave her body, and realized her water had broke. Knowing there was probably still a lot of time left, she decided to go downstairs and get herself something to drink before waking Giles and Dawn. As she was pouring herself a glass of water, another contraction hit her, this time so powerful it made her drop her glass in the sink and double over. As the pain subsided, Buffy leaned against the counter and slid to the floor.

The sound had obviously waken Giles who came into the kitchen minutes later. When he saw Buffy on the floor, he hurried to her side.

“Buffy, is everything alright?” He asked, concern in his voice. Buffy nodded just as another contraction hit and she cried out in pain.

“What’s going on?” Dawn, who had just walked into the kitchen, asked.

“Dawn, go call Willow and Tara, tell them to get here right now.” Giles told the confused teen as he helped Buffy to her feet. Dawn finally realized what was going on.

“But it’s not supposed to happen for another three weeks. Is something wrong?”

“No, Dawn, nothing is wrong.” Giles tried to calm her. “Babies arrive when they want to, not when someone tells them to. Now, go call Willow and Tara while I get Buffy upstairs.”

Dawn ran to the phone and Giles helped Buffy up the stairs. Halfway up, Buffy had to stop and hold on to the railing as another contraction ripped through her. Finally, they made it to her bedroom and Giles helped her to lay down. Buffy breathed heavily and Giles sat down on the bed, taking Buffy’s hand in his. He got a faint smile in return.

“I didn’t think it would hurt this much.” Buffy said, laughing a little. “I mean, Slayer here.”

“And I am sure that will help, dear, but I’m afraid the pain is inevitable.” Giles tried to sooth her.

“Yeah, kinda picked up on that. Oh, God.” Buffy squeezed Giles’ hand to keep her mind off the pain, but it wasn’t very successful.

“When did the contractions start?” Giles asked when Buffy released his hand, and he stretched his fingers tentatively.

“I’m sorry, did I hurt you?” Buffy asked regretfully.

“It’s fine, dear.” Giles tried to smile despite the pain in his hand. “So, how long?”

“I woke up at midnight, but I didn’t know if it was the real thing or not, so I went back to sleep.” Buffy bit her teeth together and grabbed the headboard of the bed as she was overwhelmed by another contraction. Giles looked at his watch.

“Well, the contractions are only a few minutes apart now, and it’s 7.30 in the morning. It appears you slept through a lot of it.”

“Is she OK?” Dawn had come into the room, and Buffy smiled at her.

“I’m fine Dawnie. Did you get a hold of Willow and Tara?”

“Yeah.” Dawn nodded. “They’re coming right over, and they were gonna call Xander too.”

“Giles, could you get me some water?” Buffy asked. “I think I kinda broke the one I got.”

“Of course, dear.” Giles placed a kiss on Buffy’s forehead before heading into the bathroom.

“Dawnie, come here.” Buffy said and Dawn sat down on the bed. Buffy took one of her sister’s hands in her own. “Are you sure you want to be here? You don’t have to.”

“Are you kidding?” Dawn laughed a little. “That’s my niece or nephew in there, I wanna be here for everything.”

“OK, just wanted to make sure.” Buffy smiled at her sister before her expression became pained again.

“Does it hurt a lot?” Dawn asked as the contraction subsided.

“You could say that.” Buffy managed a smile.

“Another one?” Giles asked as he came back, putting a glass of water on the bedside table.

“Yeah. They’re getting worse, too.” Buffy replied, sitting up a little in the bed to take a sip of the water. “I hope Wils and Tara get here soon.”

As if they had heard her, the front door was opened and then slammed shut.

“Hello? Where is everybody?” They heard Willow’s voice from downstairs.

“Up here.” Dawn called back and soon the two women were in the room. Willow rushed to Buffy’s side while Tara went into the bathroom.

“Hey, sweetie, how you doing?” Willow asked. Buffy smiled at her before she was once again hit by a contraction. “How long has it been going on?”

“I woke up a little after midnight from the pain, but I went back to sleep again.” Buffy said. “Then I woke up a little while ago, and now they’re pretty close.”

“OK. Just breathe, you know, like in class. Tara’s gonna check how far we’ve gotten, OK?” Willow squeezed Buffy’s hand as Tara came back from the bathroom with a large bowl of water. “Giles, why don’t you go outside for a little while, we’re gonna get Buffy ready, OK?” Willow said.

“Right, I’ll be outside, call me when...” Giles blushed and left the room, closing the door behind him.

“OK, sweetie, can you take your shorts off?” Tara asked and Buffy pulled her pajama shorts down as far as she could reach, letting Willow finish taking them off.

Willow came back to Buffy’s side with a class of some sort of liquid.

“Here, sweetie, drink this, it’ll help with the pain a little.”

Buffy nodded and reached for the glass, but before she could take it, she was overcome by another contraction, more powerful than the previous, and she couldn’t keep from crying out.

“Did your water break yet, honey?” Tara asked from where she was kneeling at the bottom of the bed. She grabbed a blanket and put it over Buffy’s lower body, giving her some privacy.

“Yeah, a little while ago.” Buffy responded before drinking down the contents of the glass Willow had handed her.

“OK. I think we got here just in time.” Tara said, and Willow gave her a questioning look. “She’s fully dilated, and I think she just went into active labor.”

“What does that mean?” Dawn asked from where she was sitting on Buffy’s right side.

“It means it’s time to push.” Willow said, turning her attention back to Buffy. “Can you do that sweetie?” Buffy nodded. “OK. I just need to check the baby’s heartbeat, and then we should be all set.” Tara handed Willow a stethoscope and Willow placed it on Buffy’s stomach. “Everything sounds great.” She said before putting the stethoscope away.

“Dawn, would you get Giles?” Tara asked, and Dawn left the room, returning a couple of seconds later with Giles, Xander and Anya in tow. Xander joined Dawn on Buffy’s right while Giles went to the other side where Willow was sitting and Anya stayed with Tara.

“Hey, Buff, didn’t think you could do this without me, did ya?” Xander smiled at Buffy, and she returned the smile before crying out as another contraction went through her.

“OK, sweetie, when the next contraction hits, I want you to push.” Tara said, giving Buffy an encouraging smile, and Buffy nodded again. Xander took one of Buffy’s hands and Willow the other, offering her support. Buffy shook her head.

“No, I’ll hurt you.”

“It’s OK, Buff, we can take it.” Xander said.

“Thanks, guys.” Buffy said as she felt another contraction wash over her, and she pushed as hard as she could.

“That’s good, sweetie, keep pushing, just a little more.” Tara encouraged her. When the contraction was over, Buffy leaned back, breathing deeply.

“Great, sweetie, I can see the baby’s head, I’m just gonna need a couple more of those, and it’ll be over, OK?” Tara said, giving Buffy the thumbs up. Buffy smiled before another contraction took over her body.

“Good, the head’s almost out, just a couple more, sweetie.” Tara’s words kept Buffy going as another contraction took over only seconds after the last one subsided and she pushed again.

“OK, the head and shoulder’s are completely out, I just need one more good push, sweetie.” The next, and final, contraction hit and Buffy used all the strength she had left.

“It’s a boy.” Tara said before the cry of the newborn sounded through the room.

Buffy exhaled and leaned back, letting her grip on Willow and Xander’s hands loosen. It was over.

Tara cut the cord before cleaning the baby off and wrapping him in a blanket. She stood up and went to the top of the bed, handing Buffy her son.

Buffy looked in amazement on the tiny creature in her arms. Her son. He opened her eyes, and she was hit by two blue orbs that she had become so familiar with over the past couple of years. Spike.

“I wish you were here.” She whispered.

2 Conversations


Fifteen years later


Buffy sighed as she closed the door to the empty house. She had been working for twelve hours straight at the doctor’s office where she had managed to get a secretary position a couple of years ago, and she was exhausted. She thanked God that Will was over at Xander and Anya’s and wouldn’t be home in another hour or so. She needed some peace and quiet.

She went into the living room and picked up one of her photo album. This was one of her favorite things to do, looking through her photos. This particular album was from Will’s ninth birthday and a couple of months after that.

Buffy wondered where the time had gone. It seemed like just yesterday she was holding her baby boy in her arms, and now he was in high school. Thoughts of Will as a baby brought, as always, thoughts of Spike, and Buffy really wasn’t in a mood to think about him at the moment, so she kept flipping through the album.

She smiled at one of the pictures, it was of Will and Savannah, Xander and Anya’s ten-year-old daughter, who was four in the picture. Xander and Anya had finally gotten married thirteen years earlier, and their son, Alex Jr. had been born nine months later, followed by Savannah when he was two. Now they were expecting their third child, and couldn’t have been happier. Xander had a management position within one of the city’s most well known construction companies, and Anya stayed at home with the kids, every now and then filling in at the Magic Box.

Buffy continued flipping through the album, stopping on a picture of Willow and Tara. She missed them. Willow had been accepted to medical school after finishing college, and now she and Tara lived in LA where Tara ran a branch of the Magic Box. It wasn’t far, and they came to visit every weekend, but it wasn’t like having them in the same town.

Another turned page and Buffy found her favorite photo of her sister. Dawn wasn’t aware she was being photographed and the picture was full of spontaneity. Dawn had ended up at UCS, majoring in art, and had gotten a job at the gallery Joyce had worked at. She and Jeff, who was a surgeon at Sunnydale Memorial, had gotten married six years earlier, and their twins, Hayley and Jordan, were four.

Next to the picture of Dawn was a picture of Giles with his ‘grandchildren’. Will and Alex were sitting next to him, and Savannah was in his lap. Giles had taken very fondly to being a grandfather, and the children adored him. He was running the Magic Box with some help from Anya and was still living in an apartment five minutes from Buffy and Will.

Buffy was pulled out of her thoughts by the door bell, and went to answer the door. When she did, she froze.

“Hello, pet.” Spike gave her the smile that was so Spike, and Buffy couldn’t help but return it. Then she remember why she was still mad at him, and the smile disappeared.

“What are you doing here?” She asked in a pained voice, looking at her feet.

“I was just around, and thought I’d stop by.” Spike replied. “Guess it was a mistake. I’ll just... go.” Buffy grabbed his arm before he had a chance to leave the porch.

“Don’t you dare take off again.” She pulled him inside and slammed the door behind them. “Where the hell have you been? It’s been almost sixteen years.”

“Around.” Spike started. Buffy crossed her arms in front of her chest in a demanding pose, and he continued. “Went to Africa first, stayed there for about a year. Then I was in Europe for about five, and after that China for a few months. Stopped in Australia for a little while and then spent some time in South America. Came back to the States about a month ago, and then I suddenly found myself driving back into Sunnyhell. Wasn’t planning on coming back here.”

“You were just gonna stay away forever? Do you hate me that much?” Spike could see tears in Buffy’s eyes, and realized that no matter how long he had stayed away, he would always come back to her.

“No, love, don’t think that. I love you. Always have, always will.” He said, wiping her tears away. “You know that.”

“Then how could you just leave? I thought you were different.” The pain had been replaced by resentment, and she pulled away from him.

“After what happened... I had to leave.” Spike mumbled. “I couldn’t stand to see the pain in your eyes and know I was the one who caused it.”

“That went well, don’t you think?” Buffy said sarcastically.

“I’m sorry, OK. Not just for leaving, for everything.” Spike said, giving Buffy a look full of regret. For a moment, she almost caved in.

“You think you can make with the apologies and everything will be fine?” Buffy asked. “It’s gonna take a little more than that.”

“Whatever it takes. If you want me to leave, say so and I’ll be gone by morning.” Spike offered.

“No. You don’t get to take the easy way out again.” Buffy replied.

“OK, then I’ll stay. Tell me what you want me to do, and I will.” Buffy met his eyes, the eyes she knew so well, and saw that he was serious.

“OK. But don’t expect too much, there’s a lot to work through here.”

“I know.” Spike kept eye contact with her and moved a little closer. Buffy felt the familiar emotion that pulled her to him, and took a step closer. Just before their lips met, the back door slammed and they jumped apart.

“Mom, you home?” Sounded through the house, and before Buffy could react, the front door had closed with a bang and Spike was gone.

*****

Will used his key to open the kitchen door and walked into the house, Xander following behind him.

“Mom, you home?” Will called after Xander closed the door. They heard the front door slam, and exchanged a look before making their way through the living room and into the hallway, where they found Buffy, staring at the door.

“Hey, mom, what’s up?” Will asked and Buffy snapped out of her trance. She gave Will a hug and a kiss on his cheek.

“Nothing baby, everything’s fine.” She smiled, but it didn’t convince Xander.

“Hey, Will, why don’t you go upstairs and get ready for bed, you’ve got school tomorrow.” Xander said while keeping his eyes on Buffy.

“OK.” Will agreed, heading up the stairs, yawning. “Night mom, night uncle Xan, thanks for helping me with my homework.”

“Night, kiddo.” Xander replied and waited until he heard the door to Will’s room close before he ushered Buffy into the living room and down on the couch. “What’s going on?” He asked in a demanding voice.

“Huh?” Buffy looked up at him as if she saw didn’t know he was there. “What do you mean?”

“I mean what’s with the whole weird acting?” Xander responded. “You were practically in a trance or something when Will and I got here.”

“Will? Where is he? Is everything OK?” Buffy looked around the room, trying to find her son.

“He’s fine, I sent him upstairs to get ready for bed.” Xander said. “I don’t think he noticed anything.”

“What am I going to do?” Buffy buried her face in her hands, and Xander put a supportive arm around her shoulder.

“Wanna tell me what’s going on?” He suggested. “It might help.”

“Spike’s back.” The two words were all Xander needed to hear, he got up and headed for the door. “Where are you going?” Xander turned at Buffy’s words.

“I’m going to go beat some sense into my favorite vampire.” Xander replied through gritted teeth. “Show him that he can’t just walz back into town and expect...”

“He doesn’t know about Will.” Buffy cut him off. “We were talking and then you two got here, he heard the word ‘mom’ and took off. I don’t know where he went. God, he probably thinks I’ve...”

“Moved on?” Xander suggested. “Which you should have done, a long time ago.”

“Xander, please don’t start again.” Buffy’s voice was tired, and Xander decided to let it go.

“Why don’t you head up to bed?” Xander said. “You look exhausted.”

“No, I have to find Spike, I have to explain.” Buffy grabbed her jacket and opened the front door. “Can you stay with Will til I get back?”

“Why don’t I go look for Spike?” Xander suggested, and Buffy raised and eye brow. “I’ll just talk to him, get him to come see you tomorrow. Now, you need to sleep.” Xander took Buffy’s jacket and hung it back up on the hook, and Buffy gave him a grateful smile.

“Thanks. I really am exhausted.”

*****

Xander took a chance and went to the crypt where Spike used to live, but without any luck. The place had been boarded shut for the past five years, so even if Spike had found his way back there, he couldn’t have gotten in. After thinking for a while, Xander decided to check Willie’s. On the way he called Anya to tell her that he might be out for a little longer.

The moment Xander stepped into Willie’s, he knew that he was in the right place. Even from where he was standing, just inside the door, he could hear Spike yelling at the bartender.

“What’s a vamp gotta do to get a decent drink around here, ey? I specifically asked for O negative, and you give me what? This crap? I can tell blood from blood, you know, I’m not stupid.”

“Actually, I think the jury’s still out on that one.” Xander said as he sat down on the barstool next to Spike.

“Oh, she send the cavalry now?” Spike smirked and took a gulp of the blood. “Must say, you were the last I expected.”

“Well, I was the one who were available.” Xander explained.

“Oh, I bet you were.” Spike mumbled into the glass.

“What’s that suppose to mean, bleach boy?” Xander asked suspiciously.

“Oh, nothing, just saying. After all, you and demon girl broke up, wouldn’t put it past you to make a move after I left.” Spike shrugged. “So, tell me, you the one who knocked her up too?”

“Is that your business?” Xander asked, getting mad and forgetting that he was supposed to get Spike to talk to Buffy.

“Guess not. Could’ve been.”

“Yeah, you’re right, it could have been.” Xander countered. “Before you tried to rape her and then walked out on her, it could have been. Now, it’s not.”

“Yeah.” Spike stared into thin air for a moment before speaking again. “Guess I’ll just take off, leave this hell hole once and for all. Nothin’ for me here.”

His words pulled Xander back to his ‘mission’. He had watched Buffy being almost happy for the past sixteen years, and he wanted more for her. If that included Spike, he could learn to live with it.

“Wait, man.” Xander grabbed Spike by the arm as he made for the door. “This wasn’t why I came here.” Spike gave him a suspicious look, but sat back down.

“Then why? To stake me?” He asked, eye brow raised.

“No, believe it or not, that’s not it either. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to, but Buffy wouldn’t like it.”

“Somehow I doubt she would care much.” Spike said. “One less vamp in the world.”

“You’re not a vamp. Well, I mean, you are, technically, but Buffy doesn’t see you as just that, and you know it.” Xander said.

“Don’t know what she sees me as anymore.”

“Well, maybe if you had stayed around, you would.” Xander snapped.

“OK, I got it, shouldn’t have left.” Spike surrendered. “But I couldn’t stay after...”

“Yeah, I get that.” Xander agreed. “And it’s probably a good thing you didn’t, cause no matter what Buffy had said back then, I would’ve staked you.”

“Maybe you should have. A long time ago.” Spike sighed. “All I ever did was hurt her. She couldn’t love me, I knew that. Still, I let her come back time after time, pulling her deeper into the darkness, even thought I knew it was hurting her.”

“It wasn’t all bad.” Xander said.

“Yes, it was.” Spike argued. “I had to leave, before one of us killed the other. Nothing good would ever come out of it.”

“Well, something did.” Xander almost bit his tongue. He hadn’t planned on saying anything about Will, wanting to let Buffy tell Spike.

“What’d you mean?” Spike asked.

“I would love to tell you, but it’s not my place.” Xander stood to leave before he said too much. “Go see her tomorrow. She gets off work at seven. She really wants to talk to you.”

Spike sat at the bar, watching Xander leave, and wondered what had just happened.

3 Catching up

Spike nervously paced around the porch a couple of times before finally ringing the doorbell. Almost immediately, the door was opened, and Buffy was standing in front of him. She didn’t look much different from the last time he’d seen her, like she wasn’t a day over twenty-one, even if he knew she must be thirty-five, thirty-six by now. He guessed it had something to do with being the Slayer.

“You’re back.” It was a statement, not a question. She stepped aside to let him in, and he walked into the hallway, looking around. Not much had changed since the last time he had been there. The night... Spike shrugged the thought off and turned to Buffy.

“Had a little talk with the Whelp, he said you wanted to talk to me.” He said in an indifferent voice, trying to keep his hopes as low as possible. Buffy’s face fell a little at his words, and he cursed himself.

“Yeah, we have some catching up to do.” She agreed, smiling slightly and indicating for him to follow her into the living room. He did and they both sat down, him in the armchair and her on the couch.

Spike looked around the room. It was pretty much the same, just more pictures. He could see some of Buffy and Dawn, others of the rest of the Scoobie gang. Then there were some of children at different ages.

“So, your kid’s not here?” Spike asked.

“No, he’s over at Xander and Anya’s.” Buffy said, shaking her head.

“Those two got back together? Wasn’t expecting that, actually.”

“Yeah, they got married in 2004, have two kids, Alex and Savannah, and a third on the way.” Buffy told Spike. “Xander’s got some high position in a construction company in town.”

“Seems they did well.” Spike stated. “How ‘bout Red and Glinda?”

“Well, Willow went to med school after college, and they moved to LA a couple of years ago. Willow’s a doctor at Memorial, and Tara runs the LA branch of the Magic Box. They’re doing great.”

“And Niblet?” Spike gave Buffy a concerned look. “She doing OK?”

“She’s working at Mom’s old gallery, she loves it.” Buffy smiled at the thought of her little sister. “She and her husband, Jeff he’s a doctor, live downtown with their kids, Jordan and Hayley.”

“She’s got kids?” Buffy almost laughed at Spike expression. “But she’s just a girl!”

“You’ve been gone a long time, Spike.” Buffy said, her voice a little sad. “Dawn is far from the kid you knew fifteen years ago. She turned thirty this year, you know.”

“Oh... I guess I’ve missed some stuff, huh?” Spike smiled sheepishly.

“You have no idea.” Buffy said under her breath.

“And what about you, pet? How’s life treating you?” Spike cocked his head to one side and gave Buffy a somewhat loving look.

“I’m good. Got a better job, at a doctor’s office. Long days, but it beats working at the Doublemeat for sure.” They both laughed at that.

“And... you’re married?” If Spike had needed to breath, he would have held his breath, waiting for her answer.

“No, I’m not. Not married, not seeing anyone. Haven’t in sixteen years.” Buffy said, voice filled with pent-up emotions.

“What about the kid?” Spike asked, and Buffy got up from the couch, crossing the room. She took a photo from the bookcase and came back giving the photo to Spike.

He looked at the photo, it was of a boy, probably about fifteen or so. He had brown hair and his features were very similar to Buffy’s. But not the eyes. The eyes were a shade of blue Spike hadn’t seen in over a century, not since the last time he saw his own reflection. He looked up at Buffy, and saw tears in her eyes.

“How?” Was the only thing he could say, emotions overwhelming him.

“Kiss of Blood ring any bells?” Buffy asked.

“Yeah, why?” Spike asked, confused. The Kiss of Blood was a thing vampires did during sex, to show their love for each other. He had done it with Buffy one time, but didn’t think she knew of the ritual.

“Well, that’s what happens with humans.” Buffy said, indicating the photo Spike was still holding.

“What?”

“I know. I didn’t really get it at first either.” Buffy frowned. “Actually, I still don’t get it, but never mind.”

“So, you mean when we did the whole blood mixing thing, you got pregnant?” Spike asked, still not completely understanding the situation.

“Pretty much.” Buffy confirmed. “We don’t know exactly how it works, though.”

“I’m sorry.” Spike gave her a regretful look. “If I’d known, I wouldn’t...”

“Don’t you dare say that!” Buffy cut him off. “Don’t ever say you’re sorry for what happened!” Spike raised a surrendering hand.

“Not what I meant. If I’d know, I wouldn’t have left, no matter what happened.” His words calmed Buffy.

“Oh.” She said, eyes fixed on the floor. “It’s not your fault, at least not completely.” She raised her eyes to look at him.

“How’s that?” Spike asked, eye brow raised.

“Well, I didn’t find out that I was pregnant until you’d been gone about a month, but I knew.” Buffy explained. “Deep down, on some level, I knew. I was just scared to face it, I guess.”

“I don’t blame you.” Spike said. “I’d have been terrified, let me tell you.” Buffy smiled a little at that.

“I’m sure you would’ve handled it.” She said in a soft voice. “I’m just sorry you missed so much, you know.”

“Me too, love.” Spike agreed. “Me too.”

They sat in silence for a little while before Buffy spoke again.

“So, where were you? What have you been doing?”

“Went to Africa first, I’d heard about this demon that had some great power. Thought he could help me get the chip out.” Buffy eyes widened at his words and he quickly continued. “Didn’t though. Went through a bunch of trials to ‘give you what you deserved’ and when it was all said and done, the wanker gave me back my soul.”

“I thought there was something different about you!” Buffy said. “So you still have the chip?”

“Yeah, got it, don’t think it’s working anymore, though.” Spike said. “Ran into a human mugger in LA before I got here, and managed to hand him over to the police without getting electrocuted, so I’m guessing it’s out off business.”

“Oh. I guess it doesn’t really matter, what with the soul and all.” Buffy said, and Spike nodded.

“Apart from that, haven’t even tried to hurt a human being since...” Spike cut himself off as he realized when exactly the last time he had tried to hurt a human had been. Buffy saw the look in his eyes and realized what he was thinking.

“It’s OK, Spike. That was a long time ago, and I forgave you for it almost as soon as it happened.” She said in a comforting voice.

“Why?” Spike asked, looking into her eyes.

“Because it was my fault too.” Buffy explained. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you had a right to do what you did, but I pushed you, for so long, that, looking back, I’m surprised nothing happened earlier.” Buffy decided to change the subject. “So, what happened after Africa?”

“Traveled around a bit.” Spike said. “Didn’t stay in one place very long, felt like something was haunting me. Maybe it was the new soul.”

“Maybe it was the feeling that you should go home?” Buffy suggested.

“Is this home?” Spike asked.

“Of course it is.” Buffy replied. “It always will be.”

“I wasn’t sure you’d be happy to see me, after...” Spike was interrupted by the phone.

“Hello?” Buffy said into the receiver. “Oh, hey Xan... OK... yeah, he’s here...” She looked up at Spike and mouthed the word ‘Xander’ to him. “That’s OK... no, it’s fine, we’ll finish up here... OK, see you in half an hour. Bye.”

She hung up the phone and turned back to Spike.

“That was Xander. He’s bringing Will home in about half an hour.”

“That’s his name?” Spike asked, looking down a the photo again.

“Short for William.”

“So, you want me to leave?”

“I think I’d better talk to him first, explain the situation.” Buffy said, hoping he wouldn’t take it the wrong way.

“OK. Makes sense.” Spike nodded. “How much does he know... about me?”

“Pretty much everything.” Buffy responded, and Spike gave her a horrified look. “Well, nothing detailed, do you think I’m stupid? He knows about the vampire thing, and the chip.”

“You told him I’m a vampire?” Spike asked, slightly shocked.

“Not at first.” Buffy said. “I mean, the first time he asked about his dad he was four, I think. You don’t tell a four-year-old that his dad’s a vampire. I told him that we loved each other, but that things got in the way and you had to leave, and that you didn’t know about him.”

“What?”

“I said that you didn’t know about him and...”

“Not that.” Spike interrupted her. “The love part.” Buffy smiled a little.

“Oh, that. I did, you know. Still do, I guess. I just didn’t realized it myself until that night... and then you were gone.”

“I wish you would have said something.” Spike mumbled.

“Me too.” Buffy responded. “I’ve regretted for the past sixteen years that I didn’t say anything.” She looked up at him, and they got lost in each other’s eyes for a moment, until Buffy broke the spell. “Anyway, I decided it was time to tell him about the things that go bump in the night a couple of years ago, so he could defend himself. Then I told him about you being a vampire, but not like other vampires. He seemed to accept it. He’s met Angel a couple of times, so he knows you can’t just divide the world into good and evil.”

“Angel’s been here?” Spike asked, the old jealousy of his grandsire surfacing. “Were you two...” Buffy cut him off.

“No, we weren’t. I’ve already told you there hasn’t been anybody since you left. Weren’t you listening?”

“Sorry. Guess he brings out the worst in me.” Spike said regretfully.

“Anyway, I told Will about how you got the chip and couldn’t hurt people, and how you helped us and stuff.”

“He knows about you being the Slayer?” Spike asked.

“I’m not.” Buffy replied. “Well, not active anymore, at least. I still go out and kill demons and vamps every now and then, just to relieve some tension, but I’ve been retired for about ten years now, ever since Leannah was called.”

“A new Slayer? But you’re not...” Spike started, then he realized. “Faith.”

“She was killed in a prison fight. Apparently the other inmates ganged up on her, and stabbed her to death. Leannah was called after that, and I decided to focus on Will, who was five then. I help train the new Slayers in the beginning, and with planning and stuff. I would probably fight if there were some big apocalypse or something, but things have been pretty quiet.”

“So, this Leannah, she still the Slayer?” Spike asked, and for a split second he saw pain in Buffy’s eyes.

“No, she lasted little over a year. Killed by a vampire gang. Then came Emma, who managed to stay alive for almost three years, but got killed by some demon. After her came Aliya, she was killed after only five months. Sarah was a great Slayer, lived past her 18th birthday, which isn’t very common. She was killed two years ago by a Master that decided to make Sunnydale his playground. Now we have Camille, she’s been here since then.”

“You cared for them?” It was more a statement than a question, and Buffy nodded.

“It’s hard not to care.” She said with a sad smile. “And it’s hard to care too, because you know that you’ll loose them. Eventually.”

“You can’t not love because you might loose someone.” Spike replied. “That wouldn’t be living.”

“I know.” Buffy said, nodding. “It took a long time, but I finally figured that out, that I couldn’t keep pushing people away.”

“I’m glad you did.” Spike said, standing up. “I guess I should go.” Buffy stood up too, nodding.

“Yeah. You could come by tomorrow night around eight, if you want, I should be able to get away from my job a little earlier than usual. I’ll talk to Will when he gets home tonight, and you two can get to know each other.” Buffy lead the way to the front door.

“I’d like that.” Spike said, smiling. “You think it’d be OK if I stopped by to see the Bit?”

“Sure.” Buffy grabbed a notepad from a table and wrote something on a paper before ripping it off and giving it to him. “That’s her address. You know where it is?” Spike nodded.

“Near the old high school, right?”

“Yeah. She’ll be so excited to see you.”

“I hope so, love.” Spike said, doubt evident in his voice. “I hope so.”

*****

“Hey, Jeff, it’s me.” Buffy said into the phone. “Is Dawn there?” She waited while Jeff went to get Dawn.

“Hey, sis, what’s up?” Came Dawn’s voice over the line, and suddenly Buffy didn’t know what to say. “Are you there?”

“Yeah, I’m here Dawnie. Listen, I need to tell you something.”

“Don’t like the sound of that.” Dawn voice was a little insecure.

“No, no, it’s a good thing.” Buffy hurried to continue. “At least I think so and I hope you will too.”

“OK, Buff, you’re not really making any sense.”

“I’m not sure how to say this so I’ll just say it. Spike’s back.” Dawn was quiet for a few seconds.

“Is he OK? Where’s he been all this time? Does he know about Will? What’s he going to...”

“Dawn, too many questions.” Buffy cut her off. “He’s fine, but I’ll let him fill you in on the rest. He’s on his way over, I hope that’s OK. He really wants to see you, and the kids.” Buffy laughed a little at the memory of Spike’s reaction to the news about Dawn’s children. “I thought he was going to have a heartattack when I told him you were married and had kids.”

“Well, what did he expect?” Dawn voice was suddenly bitter. “He’s been gone for sixteen years.”

“Dawn, please don’t be too hard on him.” Buffy pleaded. “He was going through a hard time back then.”

“I know.” Dawn sighed. “I just get so mad when I think of all the things he’s missed, you know.”

“I know, sweetie, me too.” Buffy agreed. “But he would have been here if he could, I know he would.”

“I know. I’ll try not to yell at him too much.” Dawn said, and Buffy giggled.

“OK, I gotta go. He should be there pretty soon.” Buffy said as the front door opened. “Will’s home, I’ve gotta talk to him.”

“Oh, God, how is he gonna take it?” Dawn asked.

“I’m not sure. I guess I’ll just tell him what’s going on and then we’ll take it from there.”

“Good luck.” Dawn said before hanging up.

“Might need it.” Buffy mumbled as she put the receiver down and went to talk to her son.

4 Family


“Hi baby.” Buffy said as Will closed the front door.

“Hey mom.” Will hung his jacket on a hook.

Buffy stood on her tiptoes so she could reach to kiss her son on the cheek.

“You have got to stop growing!” Will smiled and headed for the stairs.

“I’m gonna get ready for bed, gotta get up early tomorrow.” Buffy put a hand on his arm, holding him back.

“Actually, I want to talk to you for a moment.” She said and he nodded. “Let’s go into the living room.” She suggested and he followed her. When they were both sitting on the couch, Buffy turned to face him. “OK, this is gonna be harder than I thought.”

“You can tell me, mom. Is something wrong?” Buffy saw the concerned look on her son’s face and hurried to reassure him.

“No, nothing’s wrong. Everything’s... actually right, for a change.”

“Not sure I follow you there, mom.” Will said, frowning. Buffy couldn’t help but smile at how much he looked like his father when he did that.

“What would you say if I told you that you’re dad is back in town?” She said, holding her breath as she waited for a reaction.

“He’s back?” Will asked, doubtfully and Buffy nodded. “He came back, just like that?”

“He’s back.” Buffy confirmed. Will was quiet for a while.

“When?”

“He came here last night.” Buffy said, and Will gave her a hurt look. “I didn’t tell you then because we didn’t get a chance to talk. He heard you call me when you got home, and left.”

“He doesn’t know about me.” Will stated.

“He didn’t know. That’s why he didn’t stay last night. I guess he thought he was intruding or something.” Buffy said. “But Xander tracked him down and talked to him, and he came back tonight. I explained everything, and he really wants to see you. Is that OK?”

“He wants to see me?” Doubt was evident in Will’s voice, and Buffy’s heart ached.

“Of course he does, baby. He would have been her all along if he knew about you, you know that.”

“I know, mom, I know.” Will said. “It’s just, sometimes I can’t help but wonder if it was my fault he left.”

“I know how you feel, baby.” Buffy said, putting an arm around Will’s shoulder. “I felt the same when my dad left me and mom and Dawnie. But you know what? That wasn’t my fault, and Spike leaving was definitely not your fault, OK?” Will nodded. “Good.”

“Is he going to move back here?” He asked.

“I don’t know.” Buffy replied. “We didn’t really talk about that, just about you and the guys. Why don’t you ask him yourself? I said he could come over tomorrow night, if you’re OK with that?”

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Will said and smiled at his mother.

*****

Buffy was running around the house, nervously making sure everything was perfect. It was seven fortyfive, and Spike could be there any minute. Not that he was known for his punctuality.

Buffy had talked to Dawn earlier that day, curious about how her sister’s reunion with Spike had gone. The younger woman had been talking non-stop for almost half an hour before Buffy managed to get a word in. She had been so excited that her friend was finally back.

Buffy took three glasses from one of the kitchen cabinets and placed them on the table. She had decided that it would be best to make Spike and Will’s first meeting as casual as possible, for both of them, and eating usually worked. Even if Spike, technically, didn’t have to eat.

The doorbell rang just as Buffy took the pot with the pasta off the stove.

“The one time he’s actually early...” She muttered to herself and quickly poured the contents into a bowl and placed it on the table where the pasta sauce already was before wiping her hands on a towel and heading for the door.

“Hi.” She smiled at him and stepped aside to let him in. “Come on in, I made dinner.” The smile on Spike’s face turned to a suspicious look.

“You sure that’s safe?” He asked in a slightly mocking voice and Buffy playfully slapped him on the arm.

“Mom’s cooking skills have actually improved a lot in the past couple of years.” They heard from the stairs and both of them turned at the sound.

“Hey baby, come on down.” Buffy said as the silence got a bit too much for her. “Dinner’s ready.” Buffy walked through the house and back into the kitchen, but the vampire and the boy didn’t move. Buffy decided to give them a moment.

*****

Spike tried a tentative smile and to his relief, Will returned it and walked down the rest of the stairs, stopping a few feet from Spike.

“You must be Will, then?” Spike asked, and inwardly kicked himself at his stupid question. Will didn’t seem to mind, though.

“That’s me.” He replied in an easy-going voice, obviously trying to make Spike more comfortable. “You wanna go try out mom’s food? I promise it won’t kill you... considering you’re already dead and all.” Will said before leading the way through the house.

“I see you get your sense of humor from the Whelp.” He said.

“If you mean Uncle Xander, I guess you’re right.” Will replied. “He’s been kinda like a dad to me, when you were... gone.”

“I’m sorry about that... not being here.” Spike said and Will stopped to face him. “If I’d known... I’d never’ve left. You know that, right?” Will nodded.

“I know. It’s cool. You’re here now.”

*****

Buffy was smiling to herself as she cleaned up in the kitchen. Spike had taken off a few minutes earlier, with the promise to come by the next night and Will had gone up to bed, which left Buffy with the cleanup. Not that she minded, it actually gave her some time to think. Which she needed at the moment.

The dinner had been good. The conversations had been tentative at first, but when Spike found out that Will was in the high school soccer team, they got into the topic and stayed there the rest of the night. Buffy was relieved to see that they got along so good.

“Maybe things will work out after all.” She said to herself, staring into the night.

*****

Buffy was sitting at the kitchen table, looking through a soccer equipment catalogue. Will’s birthday was coming up in a couple of weeks, and she wanted to get the present buying out of the way. As the doorbell rang, Buffy looked at the clock on the kitchen wall. Eight thirty on a Friday night. She wondered who it was as she walked through the house. Will was spending the night at a friends house, Xander and Anya had taken the kids to Disneyland for the weekend and Giles never came around that late. Buffy peaked through the window beside the door, and a smile spread on her lips as she opened the door.

“Hey there.” She said, stepping aside to let Spike in. It had been little over four months since he had come back to Sunnydale, and he had been over for ‘dinner’ almost every night.

“Hey.” He said, walking past her into the house. “Where’s Will?”

“He’s sleeping over at Bryan’s, didn’t he tell you last night?” Spike gave her a questioning look. “I guess he didn’t.”

“Nope.” Spike replied. “Guess I’ll just head out then, see you both tomorrow.” He walked through the still open front door and down the porch steps.

“Wait.” Buffy called, surprising him as well as herself. They hadn’t spent any time together, alone together, since he came back. “We could... I don’t know, order pizza or something.” She gave him a smile, and he wasn’t able to refuse her. Never had been.

“OK, but I get to pick the topping.” He said, walking back into the house.

“What? No fair, you don’t even need to eat!” Buffy responded as she closed the door behind them.

*****

“Are you sure Camille said there was a nest around here?” Spike asked for the umpteenth time.

“Yes, for the last time, I’m sure.” Buffy replied, kicking down the door to an abandoned apartment building.

After the pizza had been ordered and eaten, they had gotten bored and decided to go out to patrol. Camille had told Buffy the previous day that there was a vamp nest down at the docks, and that’s where they were now. And had been, for the past hour and half. Without finding anything.

“Well, they must have moved on then, cause there’s nothing here.” Spike concluded, but froze when he saw Buffy put her finger over her mouth in a hushing motion. He closed his eyes and inhaled the night air, letting the smells and sounds wash over him. Vampires, ten or twelve of them, nearby. He opened his eyes and nodded to Buffy, who crept along the wall of the building until she got to another door. Spike took position on the other side of the door and counted with his fingers. One, two three. Buffy kicked the door down and they both stormed in. And were immediately caught up in a fight.

They hadn’t been patrolling together in over sixteen years, but fell into their old rhythm fast. They fought back to back, and had taken out seven of the vamps within a couple of minutes.

“You OK?” Spike asked, daring a glance over his shoulder.

“I’m good.” Buffy replied, using her hand axe to dust a female vampire. “You?”

“Right as rain.” Spike threw a stake across the room, dusting a vampire that was trying to run. “I think that was the last one.” He said, turning. If his heart wasn’t already still, it would have stopped.

Buffy was pushed up against the wall by two vampires while a third was biting her. Spike had no time to think, he could only react. It didn’t take him a second to get across the room, and he dusted the three vamps before they knew what was going on and caught Buffy before she hit the floor.

“Buffy, love, wake up!” He pleaded, but she didn’t respond. “Please, I need you to wake up, I can’t lose you, not again.”

“Spike?” Her voice wasn’t much more than a whisper, but he heard her.

“It’s OK, love everything’ll be fine.” He assured her and she slowly opened her eyes.

That was when he realized they were only inches apart. He could feel her breath against his face, and her smell was intoxicating. They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity before Buffy brought her arms up around his neck to pull him down to her. He felt her warm lips against his cold ones, and responded by pulling her impossibly closer.

Buffy moaned and Spike took the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth. Her own tongue greeted him, and they both gasped. It felt like time was moving at a ground breaking speed and standing still at the same time. The world could have exploded around them and they wouldn’t have noticed.

They both felt the need for closer contact and Spike moved Buffy back against the wall, lifting her up so she could wrap her legs around his waist. Buffy broke away, panting for air, and Spike made his way down her throat, kissing and nibbling while he reached between them to unbutton her jeans. Buffy’s hand stopped him.

“No.”

Spike immediately pulled his hand away and attempted to put some distance between him and Buffy. But she instead pulled him closer for another kiss, this one soft and gentle. When they pulled apart, he gave her a confused look, and she smiled.

“Not here.”

*****

“Mom, I’m home.” Will called as he closed the front door behind him. A sound was heard from upstairs, and Will smiled to himself. Had his plan worked? His question was answered as he heard muffled voices.

“Stay here, I’ll be right back.” He spotted his mother at the top of the stairs, trying to look casual. “Hey, baby, I didn’t expect you to be back so early.” She said, walking down the stairs.

“I’m baby sitting today, remember? I have to be over at Xander and Anya’s in half an hour.” Will said, giving his mother a kiss on the cheek before walking past her up the stairs. “Just wanted to take a shower and change, and then I’ll be out of your hair.”

Buffy followed her son up the stairs and after making sure he had closed the door to his room behind him, she slipped back into her bedroom.

“I don’t think he suspected anything.” She said in a relieved voice.

“And if he did that would be bad, how?” Spike asked, pulling Buffy down on the bed next to him.

“Well, he would think... and then... I mean, we don’t...”

“Buffy, love, you’re rambling.” Spike cut her off.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Buffy gave Spike an apologetic look. “It’s just, I don’t want him to get his hopes up.”

“Why not?” Spike pushed.

“Well, we haven’t really talked about any of this, just... jumped into bed.” Buffy said, getting off the bed.

“OK, let’s talk about it.” Spike said, sitting up in the bed. “I love you. Have for a long time, even longer than I’d like to admit. I know there’s something there for you too, don’t even try to deny it.”

“I know, and there is.” Buffy replied, sitting back down. “I’m just...”

“Scared?” Spike finished for her, and she nodded. “Of what, love?”

“Nothing, everything.” She responded. “I’m scared that we can’t do this, that all we can do is hurt each other. I’m scared that I am incapable of having a relationship. I’m scared that...”

“That I’ll leave?” Spike asked, looking for a reaction. After a few seconds, Buffy nodded. “I won’t.” He said, pulling Buffy into his lap. “I love you and I love Will and I would never leave either of you. Not even if you tell me to.” That got a smile from her. “So. Are we going to do this?” He asked.

“I guess we are.” Buffy replied. “Now we just have to figure out how to tell...” She was interrupted by a knock on the door.

“I’m leaving now.” They heard Will say through the door.

“OK, baby, I’ll see you later.” Buffy replied. The door opened and the two people in the bed froze.

“Oh, and try not to leave clothes out in the hallway next time.”

Epilogue


“Are you sure you’ll be OK?” Spike asked as Buffy dragged him to the DeSoto.

“Dad, you’ll be gone two days.” Will said from the porch. “I think I can manage.”

“He’ll be fine, Spike.” Buffy assured Spike as she shut the door to the passenger side behind her. “Get in the car.”

“Yes, Spike, we’ll be fine.” Giles contributed as he walked through the front door. “I am fully capable of taking care of my own grandchild for the weekend.”

“I know you are, Giles, I just...”

“Get. In. The. Car!” Buffy interrupted him and Spike obeyed.

“OK, we’re going, call if something apocalyptic happens. Love you!” Buffy called through the window as Spike pulled out of the drive way.

*****

“Are you sure they’ll be OK?” Spike asked for possibly the hundredth time.

“You do realize that Giles has been alone with Will since he was born, right?” Buffy asked.

“I know that, I just don’t... like leaving him, ‘sall.” Spike kept his eyes on the road, but Buffy could see the pain in them.

“Hey. We’ll be gone two days.” She said putting a hand on his arm. “It’s not like we’re leaving him for good. We just need some time away.” She let her hand travel lower. “Alone. Together.” Spike batted her hand away.

“OK, point taken. Do you want me to crash the car?”

*****

“Wow, this place is amazing.” Buffy said as she surveyed the suite they had rented at the Marriott in LA for the weekend. It was their anniversary, exactly one year since they had kissed – and more – after taking out the vampire nest in the docks.

“Only the best for my girl.” Spike said as he walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Buffy turned in his embrace and gave him a kiss before breaking away and heading into the bathroom to check it out.

“So, what should we do first?” She called through the open door.

“I have a few suggestions.” Spike said under his breath.

“I heard that.” Buffy said, emerging from the bathroom. “And, no, we’re not doing that. First, I mean.”

“I’m gonna hold you to that, you know.” Spike said, smirking at her.

“You better.”

*****

“Let’s go dancing!” Buffy announced as they exited the small French restaurant.

“I thought we’d go back to the hotel, do some... private dancing there.” Spike said, pulling Buffy in close for a kiss.

“Uh uh, mister. I wanna go dancing.” She responded and pulled away, waving a cab. “Sunset Boulevard, please.” She said to the driver. Spike got into the back seat next to her. She leaned her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes for a moment, letting a yawn escape her.

“See, you’re tired. Driver, make that the Marriott instead.”

“No, Sunset Boulevard.” Buffy said, giving Spike her best puppy dog eyes. “Please, baby? I really wanna go dancing.”

“Oh, fine.” Spike said. He never had been able to resist her. Buffy replaced her head on his shoulder and he put an arm around her, caressing the soft skin on her shoulder while his other hand made contact with Buffy’s knee.

“Spike, not here.” Buffy hissed, but Spike took no notice of her. He mover his hand further up her thigh, letting it slip under her skirt and found the silky material of her underwear. He heard Buffy gasp for air and froze for a moment. As she parted her legs slightly, he let his hand slip in under her panties while placing kisses along her neck and shoulder.

“Still wanna go dancing?” He asked as he slipped one finger inside her.

“The Marriott, please.”

*****

They managed to control themselves until they got into the elevator. As soon as the doors closed, Buffy wrapped her arms around Spike’s neck and attacked his mouth. In response, he lifted her up so she could wrap her legs around him. Their tongues met and caressed, and they both moaned in pleasure.

As the elevator stopped on their floor, Spike stumbled out of the elevator and down the corridor. He somehow managed to find their door and started looking for the cardkey, not able to remember where he put it. The fact that Buffy was licking and kissing down his throat while she unbuttoned his shirt didn’t exactly help.

He finally found the card and put it in the electronic lock, which clicked as the door opened. Spike used one hand to open the door and the other to pull Buffy’s top over her head. He kicked the door shut behind them and headed straight for the bedroom, getting rid of his shirt as well as Buffy’s bra on the way, while Buffy worked on the buttons in his pants and kicked her shoes off.

As they got into the bedroom, Spike dropped Buffy on the bed. He got rid off his pants before he joined her, and she pulled her skirt off along with her panties. Their lips met again and Buffy pulled him down on top of her, both of them too excited to wait any longer.

Buffy reached between them and positioned him at her entrance. He pulled back from her a little and looked her deep in the eyes as he pushed into her. They both grasped at the sensation and Buffy wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him in deeper. Spike leaned his forehead against hers, taking deep, unneeded breaths to calm himself.

As he regained some of his self control, Spike slowly pulled almost all the way out of her before thrusting back in. Buffy met his body with her own and they started their very own dance, the one only they knew. Their lips met and their tongues battled, hands roaming over every available piece of skin as they desperately searched for completion. Spike could feel Buffy’s body starting to shiver, and deepened his thrusts. Then he felt something, something he hardly remembered. The taste of fresh human blood. Slayer blood. Before he could react, he felt a pain in his tongue and could taste his own blood as well. He pulled back slightly, giving Buffy a look of both confusion and fear. She looked back at him with eyes filled with want and need, and Spike understood. He kissed her with all the love he had in him, and their blood mixed as their bodies moved together.