William was in the library. Of all the places in his new school, he felt most at home there. It was dark and cool and smelled pleasantly of books. Oh, he knew most people wouldn't think books had a smell to them, but they did. They had distinct sounds as well.

New books smelled pleasantly of fresh paper and ink. The feel of opening a new book for the first time and reverently leafing through its smooth, untouched pages was a particular pleasure for William. Older books were slightly musty and often had the indefinable scent that said 'library'. He had a fondness for these too, even for the plastic library covers that crackled agreeably when opened. His textbooks were thick and heavy and slightly banged up from past owners and their thin, slick pages made soft swooshing noises under his hands as he turned them.

No matter that he was in a completely different country from that of his birth, the books remained constant and that was a comfort.

He sighed. He wasn't finding the U.S. to be as agreeable as the books. It was too different. He was too different. He was fiercely homesick, for his country, for his home, for his friends, for real football. He knew his mother hadn't had much choice but to come and live with her sister-in-law since their finances had been in such a dire state after his father's death, but that didn't make it much easier. Finding out that his father had cancelled his life insurance policy the year before and gambled away most of their savings had been a severe shock to Anne. When Jenny had generously offered a place to live, she'd leapt at it.

William knew that part of the reason she'd been so eager to go was his recent trouble at school. He'd been attacked by another boy and defended himself. As he'd attended martial arts training since he was four, as his one bonding activity with his father, the other boy had been badly hurt. He shuddered as he remembered the intense feelings of rage that had flooded him when the boy hit him. He'd lost it. He'd known logically he shouldn't use his skills for more than gaining time to get away from the situation, but years of being teased and picked on for his small frame, bookishness and seeming vulnerability had flashed through his mind in that instant and he'd snapped.

He would've been able to stop had the boy stopped getting up and coming at him. But the larger boy didn't. He kept coming and coming until he couldn't rise anymore. When William saw he'd stopped flailing at him, he came to his senses and realized what he'd done. The other boy was a mass of bruises and blood. The tally of notable injuries in the end was one broken nose, a broken jaw and two cracked ribs. As for William's condition, only the first punch had landed. He had a single visible bruise to show in his defense.

They'd gone easy on him due to the recent death of his father. It was argued that he'd never been a violent boy before. The punishment handed to him didn't bother him as much as the look of deep disappointment and worry he saw in his mother's eyes.

Moving here had made it worse, though. At least after that incident, no one had bothered him much. Here there was no such knowledge of his past, no knowledge of his capabilities. Here he was fair game again.

He bent his head to his science book again. He had a test in an hour and was getting a little last minute studying done in this free period.

The library doors burst open and slammed against the walls. A blonde blur whipped past and straight to the librarian's desk. "Giles!" The girl called loudly. "Giles, please, I need your help!" She turned and scanned the library quickly for the man she sought. Her eyes passed over William without notice.

"Buffy," Giles came out of his office, "what is all this fuss you're making? Please do try to be quiet. Others are trying to work, you know."

"I'm flunking English," she wailed at him, "and I'm going to be grounded for life when my parents find out."

Giles shook his head in consternation. "You're flunking your native tongue and you wish me to do precisely what about this now? I tried to help you earlier and was roundly refused, if I recall correctly. Something about cheerleading practice being too demanding to allow time for schoolwork."

She dumped her books loudly and carelessly on the nearest table and threw her tiny form at the desk dramatically, clutching the counter. "You have to help me. Please. I know I didn't want help before, but ," she smiled weakly and hopefully at him, "I really want it now! I'm all, you know, interested in the great literature of…darn it," she rifled through her books, "the 19th century! I have a newfound appreciation! I love-" she glanced down, "Emily Bront." she mispronounced the name horribly and Giles winced. "You can't turn an student down who's really motivated to learn, right?"

Giles adjusted his glasses. "Truly motivated to learn, by what exactly? Running up against the good grades rule on the cheerleading squad? Needing to be allowed to continue visiting that local hangout you kids go to? Not good enough." He turned and straightened something that didn't need straightening.

William listened in fascination to the scene playing out in front of him and darted occasional looks at the two participants, knowing they were completely oblivious to his presence. He knew that the girl, Buffy Summers, was one of the most popular girls in school. She was on the cheerleading squad that cheered for that nancy rugby wannabe sport team they had here.

He also knew that she was beautiful. He'd noticed her sunny, sincere smile, so unlike the others of her set and her long golden curls. William was a quiet observer of life in his new school and he'd noticed that the others participated in teasing those in the 'less fortunate' social cliques, but she never did. Oh, she didn't stand up for the kids they tormented, but she never joined in the torture and sometimes he thought he saw her look away, a small moue of distaste upon her perfect glossy lips.

Tears were welling in her big, green eyes now. "Please, Giles," she begged softly. "I really need your help."

William didn't know why, but he couldn't bear seeing this golden girl upset. "I'll help you." He volunteered quietly and rose from his seat. They both turned in surprise to stare at him.

"You..you will?" Buffy asked hesitantly, "Really? Do you know about this…stuff?" She gestured broadly at the haphazard pile of books.

"Well, I can't read them for you, but I can help you with your assignments." William said. "I'm in the same class."

"You…oh, you are?" She flushed in embarrassment, obviously trying to remember his name and failing.

"I'm William. William Pratt." He said. "I'm new here. I don't talk much in class. I don't expect you've noticed me."

"Um," Buffy said haltingly. "I'm Buffy Summers. It's nice to meet you, William."

"Pleasure to meet you too, Buffy." He inclined his head solemnly.

"Well then, that's settled. You've got your tutor, Buffy. I do hope you'll apply yourself." Giles grabbed a random paper and fled to his office.


"Where would you like to begin, pet?" William asked her.

He was fascinated by the slender fingers of her hand as she fiddled with the pen. The shiny, pink sheen of her nail polish gave him the strangest urge to pick up her hand, take her finger into his mouth and taste it on his tongue. It looked edible, a color suited for bubble gum and candy. She brought the pen to her lips and bit it lightly, deep in thought, scanning the page she was reading. He looked down at his notes quickly.

"William?" Buffy waved said fingers in front of his face. "Where did you go?" She laughed.

He shook himself out of his daze. "Sorry, pet. Daydreaming, I guess." He pulled her notebook towards him and inspected what she'd written.

Her handwriting was bubbly and childish, like the outward behavior of the girl herself. William knew she wasn't stupid or air-headed, even from the small amount of time he'd spent with her but glimpses of the sharp-witted mind beneath the surface were few and far between. She girded herself with the mantle of the cheerful, carefree teenage future prom queen candidate and rarely let it slip.

Wuthering Heights wouldn't have been on his preferred reading list, had he a choice, but he'd read the book aloud to his bedridden grandmother the last summer he'd spent with her and they'd discussed it at length as they progressed through the novel, which was one of her favorites. She was a retired professor who could no longer attend her regular book club due to her ill health and she missed the conversations and company. Her eyes were failing, robbing her of her favorite pastime; she liked him to read her to sleep in the evening, the soothing cadence of his youthful, strong voice comforting her. He knew the book well.

He sighed when he saw what Buffy had written. "You aren't serious." He made a face and read. "'Cathy was an idiot to let Heathcliff go and marry Linton. Linton wasn't nearly as hot even though he was rich. Plus he was a wimp.' This is utter rubbish and you know it." He rubbed his eyes underneath his glasses. "I meant it you know, when I said I wouldn't do your work. Won't read the books for you or write the essay." He had a sudden flash of empathy for Giles. He was beginning to understand the librarian’s odd reluctance to assist Buffy.

She looked at him contritely and pouted those gorgeous lips. "I'm sorry, is it bad?"

"Oh, that's enough of that. I know you aren't dumb and I'm not either. I said I'd help you, but doing that," he jerked his thumb contemptuously at her face, "isn't going to get me to change my mind about cheating for you. So you'd better decide if you really want my help or you want to go it alone or get another tutor."

"Oh no, William, please," she grabbed his arm and he froze, staring at her small fingers that were actually touching him. "Please don't give up on me. I can do better. It's just," she frowned, "you know we have to read them aloud in front of the class."

Suddenly, it made more sense. He thought he understood the problem. She didn't want to get up in front of her friends and sound too intelligent, like a book geek. She was trying to find a way to complete the assignment and not attract undue attention from her friends in the process. She'd erred far too much on the latter side, in his opinion. "Buffy," he said gently, "if you're going to pass, you'll need to do much better than this."

She removed her hand and he felt the loss immediately. "I know. But it's stupid and I ought to be able to say it is. Cathy was an idiot for leaving Heathcliff. She loved him and he loved her and they could've married and lived happily ever after instead of both missing each other to the point they were crazy and ending with both of them dead. She was an idiot,” she repeated and took a breath. “I meant it when I wrote that," she looked at him defiantly.

"Well, they weren't really the happy ending sort, I think, even if they had married." William commented, amused by her ardent stream of babble.

She reached for her copy of the book and flipped through the pages. "Here," she said, "read that part. That part right before she dies, when she sees Heathcliff one last time. See, I read the book. I did."

He surprised her when he began to read it aloud, his voice low and smooth, his accent…she shivered. His accent was well, hot. Why hadn't she noticed what a great voice he had? 'He can read to me anytime,' she thought suddenly and was shocked at herself. 'This is William, remember? Tutor guy - focus!'

"You teach me now how cruel you've been - cruel and false. WHY did you despise me? WHY did you betray your own heart, Cathy? I have not one word of comfort. You deserve this. You have killed yourself. Yes, you may kiss me, and cry; and wring out my kisses and tears: they'll blight you - they'll damn you. You loved me - then what RIGHT had you to leave me? What right - answer me - for the poor fancy you felt for Linton? Because misery and degradation, and death, and nothing that God or Satan could inflict would have parted us, YOU, of your own will, did it. I have not broken your heart - YOU have broken it; and in breaking it, you have broken mine. So much the worse for me that I am strong. Do I want to live? What kind of living will it be when you - oh, God! would YOU like to live with your soul in the grave?"

"See! Heathcliff agrees with me that she's stupid," Buffy said, feeling justified by the passage, "He's really mad at her and it's obvious he agrees with me and HE even loves her!"

"Oh, but he's not most angry with her for his own sake, pet, he forgives her that - more for hers and he doesn't say she's stupid, he calls her cruel and betrayer. She betrayed herself as well as him when she married Edgar. See here..." William read on a few lines below her selection.

"It is hard to forgive, and to look at those eyes, and feel those wasted hands,' he answered. 'Kiss me again; and don't let me see your eyes! I forgive what you have done to me. I love MY murderer - but YOURS! How can I?"

William said the phrase, 'kiss me again' and Buffy leaned towards him unconsciously. 'He should do that for a living,' she thought, impressed, 'Be one of those guys who records books or something'. The words flowed effortlessly and he imbued them with such passion.

Buffy straightened and grabbed the book back from him, finding the line she wanted. "I'm not the only one who thinks she's a moron. Nelly hates her too! She wishes her dead!"

"She's fainted, or dead,' I thought: 'so much the better. Far better that she should be dead, than lingering a burden and a misery-maker to all about her."

He laughed at her fervor and she flushed and glared at him, stung, thinking he was laughing at her.

"Not laughing at you, luv," he explained. "See? You can get into a passionate discussion about the book. You just need to put it into uh…fancier wording, yeah? You could choose to do a character study on Catherine and how stupid and selfish she was and how it affected those around her. Something like that anyway."

"I can't believe you don't think she's an idiot." Buffy said, tapping her pen in irritation.

He was getting his books together, the bell was about to ring. "Never said I didn't! I do think she's an idiot. Not one of my favorite characters." He smirked at her and left. "See you later."

'That smile was bone melting,' Buffy thought. 'He has a really, really nice smile,' she reconsidered her wording, 'no, not nice, sexy.' But reconciling William, of the floppy, curly hair and glasses, and 'sexy' was too much for her. She shrugged it off and ran to class.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William could still feel the imprint of her fingers on his arm as he hurried away. 'Ponce,' he thought disgustedly, but the uneasy feeling stayed with him as he slid into his seat before the second bell rang and he could still feel her touch lingering...

The next day, to William's surprise, Buffy caught up to him as he left history, which they also shared. "William, wait!" She said, falling in beside him as he walked down the hall. He stopped.

"Hi Buffy." He wondered what she could want. It wasn't time for their study session yet and she'd never spoken to him outside of the library in the four days since he'd started tutoring her.

"Hey - look, I can't come during sixth period today. I have to catch up with Cordy on some stuff for cheerleading. We're planning a new routine and she can't do it after school…you don't care, but-" Buffy babbled.

William was surprised at the amount of disappointment he felt at this announcement. Admittedly, he'd been thrilled that the other day they'd been given a two week extension to work on their oral report projects, because it meant there'd be more time spent with Buffy, whose company he was enjoying very much, but he hadn't realized how much he'd miss it when she didn't need him anymore. He still had very few friends at school, due to his shyness, and the time he spent with her in the library was fast becoming his favorite part of the day.

"-anyway, can you?" She finished breathlessly.

"Erm, sorry, what? Can I what?" William stammered, caught out in his inattentiveness.

She gave him an odd look. "Can you come to my house after school?" She prodded him, "You know, to study, since I can't make it sixth period?"

"Oh! Sure, pet. Of course, I can do that. You'll have to give me the address." He said calmly, as inside the disappointment eased at the fact that they'd still be meeting today.

"Oh, um…" Buffy smiled at him hopefully, "I was kinda hoping you'd offer to drive me home. You have a car, right? That way it's all simple, right? You take me and I don't need to write directions. Buffy and directions are non-mixy. One of the reasons I don't drive. I always end up not counting a light or forgetting a turn and getting people hopelessly lost. I could probably get you REALLY lost, because you know, you're new here and you wouldn't be familiar with the roads and all..." She took a breath. "I'm babbling again."

"Yeah, you are." He smiled. "They do have such things as online maps now, you know. They help quite a bit with that sort of thing."

She looked at him shrewdly, "You probably think I'm not that bright, huh?"

'Ok, where did that come from?' He thought.

The 'huh' must've shown on his face because she continued, "With the constant babbling thing."

'No, I think it's cute,' he thought, but he said, "Oh, no!" He smiled again, "Just think you may be a bit highly caffeinated, pet."

A broad smile lit her face, "Yeah…nope! No artificial substances needed. It's a natural kind of hyper!"

"Probably what makes you such a good cheerleader, all that bottled enthusiasm." He told her mock seriously.

"Yep!" She said smugly. "No energy shortage here! So," she prompted him, "the ride?"

"Of course, I can give you a ride. Not a problem. Where do you want to meet?"

"Oh," she hesitated for a split second, thinking, "How about the north side entrance?" She named the exit near the small teachers' lot where students didn't usually linger.

He gave her a look that told her he knew what she was thinking and she squirmed a little guiltily under his scrutiny, but he said, "Fine, I'll be there after last bell."

"Ok! Thanks! See you then!" And she was off down the hall.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William swung the heavy passenger side door to the Desoto open for Buffy.

'Wow,' she thought as he got in on the driver's side, 'This is the cleanest car I've ever seen. No fast food wrappers and discarded soda cans for this boy.' The outside was black and well cared for too, the chrome shining brightly in the afternoon sun. It was a strange car for someone their age to have, really, and very different from the BMWs and sports cars Buffy was used to riding in. "Interesting car," she said, "and it's so neat! Where did you get it?"

"I'm not a slob," he laughed, "and anyway, it's not mine. It belongs to my uncle. My aunt's just letting me drive it."

"Doesn't your uncle mind?" Buffy asked. "I mean, it looks like he really loves it."

"No." William paused. "Well, I don't know if he minds or not as he's not around to mention it."

"Oh," Buffy was horrified at herself and she said in a low tone, "I'm sorry-" She hadn't gotten the impression from his words that the man was dead, but she was distressed to bring up a sore topic.

"Oh no, pet, it’s nothing like that." William drummed his fingers on the steering wheel a moment, then slipped the car into reverse and backed up carefully. "Well, at least I don't think so. He disappeared about four months ago. Went out to the store and never came back kind of thing."

"Oh, your poor aunt!" Buffy said. "So she has no idea what happened to him?"

"No. The car was found at the airport about a week after she reported him missing, but there wasn't any record of him taking a flight. So we don't know what happened." William shrugged and pulled out of the parking lot. "Aunt Jenny said I could use the car. He loved it a lot, rebuilt it himself, so I'm trying to take good care of it for him in case he comes back."

Buffy was silent. After a moment, she pointed the way to turn and said, "So you live with your aunt, then?"

"Yeah, and my mum." William said, not offering any more detail.

Buffy wasn't dissuaded, however, "So you came here from England to live with her and help her out?"

William raised an eyebrow at her. She hadn't shown any interest in his background before. 'Just making polite conversation,’ he thought.

"Something like that," he responded quietly. "My father died a couple of months ago. My uncle is my mother's brother, so Jenny's not related to us by blood or anything, but she and my mum have always gotten along well. They're helping each other out, basically." He finished, turning onto a new street at her prompting wave.

"Oh." Buffy said softly. "That must be so hard for you. I'm so sorry." She gazed at his face earnestly.

William's face remained impassive. He didn't look back at her, but kept his eyes firmly focused on the road. "Yeah," was all he said, obviously closing the topic.

Buffy was suddenly grateful for the boring normalcy of her own family. Even her bratty sister, Dawn, was looking pretty good right now. She often felt stifled by her father's expectations of her and both parents' strict rules, but at the moment all she wanted was to give him a hug. She thought about how awful it would be to lose him and have to start over in a new place in such a short amount of time.

Buffy was at a loss for words. That never happened. She looked out the window and they drove the rest of the way in silence.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy rummaged through her bag for her keychain then swung the bag back onto her shoulder when it was finally located. "Can never find anything in there," she muttered apologetically. She inserted the key and opened the door. "Come on in."

He followed her into the living room.

"Oh good," she said, "Dawn's not home. No loud boy bands playing and no television on." She dumped her book bag on the coffee table. "Go ahead, sit. Want a drink?"

"Coke please, if you have it," he answered.

"Yeah, sure. Be right back." She left, heading for the kitchen.

William didn't sit immediately. He wandered around the room, taking in the pictures of Buffy, and presumably her sister, cute little thing, he thought, at various stages of their childhood. A bitty, pigtailed Buffy in a yellow sundress clutching a doll and smiling happily at whoever had taken the picture made him grin. She was adorable even then, he thought, a little bundle of sunshine. Another one had caught her mid-leap in a pale blue skating costume. A few trophies surrounded this picture, like a small altar to Skating Buffy. He wondered if she still skated. Looking at the dates on the trophies, he didn't think so.

He walked back to the comfortable couch and sat at one end, not wanting to be thought to be prying. Her house was warm and pleasant, just like the girl. Nothing too extravagant or flashy, it was decidedly mid to upper middle class, with the focus on being cozy. Everything had obviously been chosen with comfort and cheer in mind, not only looks, though nothing was shabby or cheap looking.

Buffy walked back out of the kitchen with the drinks in hand. "Here you go," she set it in front of him and walked around to perch in the middle of the couch. They had a test in history the following day so they were going to work on that.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"How come you know more of my country's history than I do?" Buffy complained, pouting at him, having just 'failed' his first round of questions.

He laughed, "This time I am laughing at you a little. Just a little, though." He settled the book on his thigh. "Don't know. How are you on world history?" He teased. "I have noticed that's been lumped into one course for next year, so perhaps course makeup is part of the problem." He grinned. "Lot of history to be packing into one year of classes, that is. Interesting choice. Got a whole year for American History and your country hasn't even been around all that long. It's a baby, relatively speaking."

She smacked his arm lightly. "Don't be mocking my country, sir. We kicked your country's-"

The front door slammed open.

He put his arm up defensively, smiling. "Hey, not mocking, pet, just pointing out that it's young and yet receiving the same amount of class time as the, oh, entire history of the rest of the world."

He recognized the gawky, brown haired girl as Buffy's sister from the pictures as she thumped into the room, dropping her things and shoving her sister over rudely as she flopped onto the couch. She picked up the remote and turned the television on.

"Well…we're important!" Buffy said somewhat lamely, then turned to the girl. "Dawn! What are you doing?"

Dawn looked at her and a condescending expression formed on her face as she spoke very slowly, enunciating each word carefully as if to a small child, "I am watching television."

"No, you're not!" Buffy's voice got louder. "We're studying here. You can't just come in and interrupt us-"

Dawn looked around the room pointedly, "Not stopping you, you can stay. Just sitting here minding my own business. You can still study." She said, even as her thumb pressed the increase volume button on the remote.

"No we can't! Who could think with that on that loud?" Buffy protested.

"Please, Buffy," Dawn retorted, "I've heard you blast your music before when you're studying. Noise never seemed to bother you then."

Buffy exploded. "That's when I'm ALONE and don't need to hear anybody else talking." She fumed at her sister.

"Maybe we could go in the kitchen?" William suggested.

"No, sound carries in there, we won't be able to think at all and Dad's study is off limits. C'mon," Buffy gathered her book, notebook and pens. She shot her sister a look, "We'll just go upstairs and leave her to her obnoxious show."

"Ohhhh! Boy in your room! Buffy Anne, I'm so telling on you!" Dawn crowed, gleeful at the prospect.

"Not a boy!" Buffy shouted, "It's William, he's my tutor!" She entirely missed William's slight flinch at this, but Dawn's sharp eyes did not and she eyed him with newfound interest. "If you mention anything, I'll just be forced to expose your sneaking out last Friday." Buffy continued smugly.

Dawn gasped. "You wouldn't dare!" She screeched. "I just wanted to go to the movies and Mom wouldn't let me!"

"I SO would," Buffy stated firmly. "Anyway, you're pathetic at sneaking out," she sniffed, "make MORE noise getting to the tree, why don't you."

"Maybe I should take lessons from you!" Dawn sputtered somewhat ineffectively and settled back deep in the couch cushions with a huff and a pout, conceding the argument.

William had stood by uncomfortably during this exchange, but he nearly laughed aloud at the pout. "That's one thing they have in common," he thought.

"So," Buffy said sweetly, "Let's go, William." She led him up the stairs to her room.


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

He sat uncomfortably, at her bidding, on the edge of her bed, while she sprawled on it next to him. Her desk was too cluttered to hold all of their materials, so she'd dubbed the bed the best spot. It wasn't only her desk that was cluttered. Every surface or fixture that could hold clothing had something strewn over it carelessly. Her bed hadn't been made when they entered the room and she'd pulled the duvet up and smoothed it hastily before settling onto the bed. She'd also tossed a few filmy unmentionables in her hamper before showing him in. "Sorry about the mess," she'd said offhandedly and made no further explanation.

Her room was, besides being messy, in a strange sort of transitional state, seeming trapped between childhood and adulthood. The wallpaper was a pastel pink floral stripe and a pile of stuffed animals sat on a chair, but the clothing visible was anything but childish or reserved. The small halter tops and miniskirts of which she was so fond were scattered everywhere in their multicolored glory. The duvet on which she currently reclined had a more sophisticated print than the wall; it was a soft, silky white fabric with a more delicate gold floral pattern covering it.

He'd stumbled over a lone black high heeled shoe as they made their way to the bed and she'd merely said, "Oops," and tossed it carelessly into the closet. That shoe wasn't childish at all.

He gradually relaxed somewhat and continued quizzing her for the upcoming test. She hadn't failed the second round, she'd done much better actually and he realized that while the dates didn't seem to stick in her head at all, easily anyway, she was good at remembering the people, events and the circumstances that led up to them. He hammered in the dates a few more times until she was able to parrot them back satisfactorily.

When it was his turn, Buffy noted with annoyance that he could answer everything straightaway, no hesitation or additional thinking required.

He saw her disgruntled look and smiled, saying carefully, "After all, pet, helping you did burn the stuff firmly in my mind too, yeah?"

She smiled back at him, appreciating that he didn't make her feel stupid for not knowing as much as he did about the subject. 'Unlike some people,' she thought ruefully, but got off of that train of thought in a hurry.

When they were finished, she thanked him as she always did and showed him to the door. As the door shut behind him, Dawn commented neutrally, "He likes you."

"What? No…no he doesn't," Buffy said, confused. "He's just helping me out. He took pity on me."

"He calls you pet," Dawn said, matter-of-factly.

"He calls everyone pet." Buffy replied defensively. Did he? Buffy tried to remember hearing him ever say it to anyone else. She couldn't, but she realized she hadn't heard him talk to anyone else, so it wasn't a good standard to go by. "He's just my tutor," Buffy repeated her earlier statement firmly.

"Whatever." Dawn rolled the lollipop she was licking around a few times and spoke around it. "He so likes you. He's nicer than Angel." With that, she turned her back on her flustered sister and went back to watching television.

'No, no he doesn't like me,' Buffy thought, 'he's just a decent person and…' she thought truthfully to herself, 'maybe a little lonely here.' She screwed up her face in thought. ‘He doesn't like me….does he?’

William stood with his lunch tray, looking out uncertainly over the vast room buzzing with students. Usually, he took his food outside with a book, but today it was uncharacteristically pouring. He sighed and started for an unpopulated area near the wall.

"William!" A voice cut through the lunchtime chatter. He turned towards it and saw the redhead who was in his science class. 'Bright chit,' he thought, 'what was her name? Oh yeah, Willow.' She was almost as shy as he was though and he couldn't think why she was calling his name.

She beckoned him over to the table where she sat with two other students, a boy and a girl. He gave a half shrug to himself and headed over.

"Hi William!" Willow said cheerily. She'd seen him paused at the exit from the food line and felt bad for him. "You can sit with us if you want. I'm Willow, you know me from bio. This is Xander," the dark haired boy stopped shoveling food in his mouth long enough to nod an acknowledgment to the introduction. "and this is Tara." A mop of dirty blonde hair was all that met his eyes at first, but then she raised her head and smiled shyly at him, gentle blue eyes welcoming.

"Hello." William said and took the seat next to Willow. "Thanks. I appreciate it." He felt slightly uncomfortable at first, as the three of them had obviously been friends for a long time and had their own shorthand way of communicating, but he soon relaxed as the conversation flowed easily around him.

He took a moment to surreptitiously look around the room. 'Ah, there she is,' he thought as he found Buffy at one of the boisterous central tables. He enjoyed the rare opportunity of observing her in her own element. She was laughing now at something someone had said and shaking her head in denial.

He stilled as he saw the tall dark haired boy come up from behind her, scoop her up and deposit her on his lap. 'That'd be the boyfriend,' he thought, 'great "football" playing git he is too.' He'd known she was dating Angel O'Connor, who could not know? They were one of the school's most visible and popular couples. He eyed the other boy with distaste. 'Doesn't look like he has a brain cell in his head,' he thought in disgust. He was kissing Buffy now. William looked away.

"So, William, how do you like it here so far?" Willow asked.

"It's not so bad," he said politely, although privately he thought it was getting worse every moment. "It's very different, of course."

"Oh yeah, I'll bet it is! I'd love to go to England! Do you…" Willow proceeded to pepper him with questions about London and he responded to them all as best he could, allowing her to distract him from other less pleasant thoughts.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy couldn't tell what was different. But something was definitely off today. William was too quiet. He was always reserved, but today he hadn't teased her once or mocked her very own version of the spoken English language at all, as he'd done before. 'Something's different,' she repeated to herself, 'but what? He almost seems mad at me, but I haven't even seen him all day, so that can't be it.' She tapped her pen in irritation.

Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap…taptaptaptaptaptaptap...the pen increased speed and the taps continued in rapid succession.

He flicked his eyes up from his book to meet hers. "That's terribly annoying, you know. It's very distracting," he said coolly.

Buffy spitefully thwacked the pen harder against the table a few more times before she flung it down. "What is your problem?" She asked him. "You're in like, the worst mood today."

"Yes," he said clearly, "I am 'like'," he emphasized the word with disdain, "not in the best of moods."

This wasn't at all his normal gentle jab at her verbal skills. It was rude. Buffy glared at him and grabbed her books. "I'm not getting much done today, except annoying you." The glare faded, replaced by a slightly puzzled look. "Think I'll quit for now and try again when I get home. I'll see you Monday?" She deliberately made that a question.

William looked down again. "Yeah. Monday."

"Ok." Buffy didn't bounce out of the library as usual, instead she walked almost sedately through the doors.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William chucked his bag in the corner.

His mother asked, "William, is that you?" She came around the corner into the entry way and studied him, "Is something wrong?"

"No, Mum," he said.

"William-"

"Everything's fine, Mum. Just in a hurry to get to the gym." He grabbed his gym bag that sat, packed and ready, on the hall bench right where he'd forgotten it that morning.

"Ok," she still looked worried, but she said, "be home in time for dinner."

"Yes, Mum," he said dutifully and gratefully escaped.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William had found a gym the first week in town. It wasn't the shiniest, newest, cleanest gym, but it suited his purposes and was inexpensive, which was important. His mother had obtained a permit to work and found a job, but money was still tight.

He changed quickly and headed for the heavy bags. Wrapping his hands quickly, he tore into the bag, unleashing all of his repressed feelings at it. He began to intersperse kicks with jabs. 'Dammit, that kick's still not high enough,' he said to himself, frustrated.

"Who are we killing today?" A melodious voice asked, amused.

He turned and found a pale, thin, girl watching him from her perch on a stack of mats. "Didn't know I had an audience, " he said, annoyed. It faintly registered that the girl's accent was straight from home. 'Nother Brit,' he thought, 'What does this town have some kind of ad promoting migration to Sunnydale or something? ' He wondered, thinking of Giles.

"I've nothing else to do. I'm bored," she said, flipping a long lock of dark hair away from her face.

"Well, typically, you go to the gym to work out." William said dryly.

She sniffed, "I'm waiting for my daddy to drive me home. Working out is boring." She rose from the mats gracefully and walked closer to him, staring at him intently.

'Strange, rude chit she is,' William thought, unnerved by the stare.

"My name is Drusilla." She said, extending her hand as though she were royalty and expected it to be kissed.

His innate politeness kicked in and he cursed it silently. He shook her hand and said tersely. "William."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"That is so not your color." Cordelia said regarding the top Buffy was currently trying on. "Makes your skin all yellow."

"You think?" Buffy said, "Not all golden tan yummy, huh?"

"No," Cordelia laughed, "more like sallow icky. Take it off."

The two girls had had a standing Saturday shopping date since forever. Sometimes they'd go to the Sunnydale Mall, other times the little strip of boutiques in town and for a treat occasionally Cordelia would drive them to L.A. to shop at "real stores" as she dubbed them. They were hitting the local shops on Main Street today.

Buffy complied, trading the top for a silky, little blue halter. "This better?" She modeled it, posing over dramatically for Cordy.

"Muuuch better," Cordy drawled. "That'll look nice with that pair of jeans." She plucked them from the pile.

Buffy agreed.

Cordelia admired herself in the mirror. "How can all this hotness go so completely unappreciated." She sniffed.

Buffy laughed at her friend. "You're obviously just too hot for high school guys."

"That must be it." Cordelia agreed solemnly.

"From that I get that you don't have a date for tonight?" Buffy asked.

"No. The dry spell is now officially desert level." Cordelia said, ruefully. "No interest since Adam."

"Who was a dry spell all by himself." Buffy commented and both girls laughed. Cordy's last boyfriend had been a bore of epic proportions. He'd been headed for the professional golf circuit, or so he thought, and his conversation tended to center around greens, birdies, pars and putts.

"The best thing about him was his hair," Cordy remarked, giggling, "at least he had good hair."

"Yeah, and his hair wasn't the talky part."

"No," Cordy sighed, "If only he didn't talk. He'd have been perfect. He was salty goodness when he was quiet." The girls debated whether the strong silent type was indeed a more suitable date than the all golf all the time guy as they brought their items to the cash register.

Cordy whipped out her platinum card. "I don't know, at least I wouldn't have to pretend I was listening if he didn't talk."

Buffy snorted.

Cordy finished paying and a serious look came over her face. "Buffy," she said hesitantly, "What's going on with you and that English guy?"

"William, you mean?" Buffy frowned.

"See, that's just it. I don't know his name." Cordy pointed out, "You do. Why is that?"

Buffy shrugged, "He's been helping me with my grades. You know I was close to getting kicked off the squad and no telling what my parents would've done if I'd brought home a worse report card than last time. My social life would've been grimsville."

"Yeah, grim, like what happens when you're hanging out with total geeks," Cordy said, "Like, oh, your buddy William. Really not a good idea to be seen with him, Buffy. What were you doing in his car?"

Buffy looked startled, then recovered, "He just drove me home that day you had to skip practice. We studied at my house."

"Well, just so you know, Angel's not happy." Cordy relayed, "He can't figure out why you're spending so much time with this guy."

"Please, Angel's jealous of William?" Buffy laughed, "That's ridiculous. Hello, spending time with him so I CAN spend time with Angel. I told you, he's just helping me out. "

"Why's he doing that, Buffy? What does he have to gain?" Cordy asked as they picked up their bags to leave.

"Why does everyone think he has an ulterior motive?" Buffy muttered under her breath. "He likes books and stuff." She finally said, louder. "Plus he's lonely here, I think."

"Well," Cordy paused delicately, "Angel's not happy about it." She reiterated. "He may not be jealous, but he doesn't like how it looks. Do what you want. I just thought you should know. You know Harmony's just been dying for you two to break up." She said meaningfully. "I'd hate to see that happen."

"We're not breaking up." Buffy said staunchly,"…and ewww, c'mon, Harmony?" They walked down the sunny street in silence.

Buffy paused at the window of a men's shop. "Hey Cordy, I have to go in here a sec. Need to grab a tie or something for my Dad's birthday. You go on ahead, I'll meet you at the Espresso Pump."

Cordy flipped her fingers at her. "Ok, I'll grab our table," and proceeded to the next stop on their Saturday ritual.

Buffy had the tie for her father in her hand when she turned and noticed a mannequin wearing a deep blue button down shirt. She ran her fingers along the smooth fabric appreciatively. 'Soft,' she thought. 'Same blue as William's eyes,' her mental voice continued, somewhat regretfully as she recalled their disagreement the prior afternoon. She'd noticed his eyes when he'd removed his glasses to clean them one day. They were such a clear, deep blue that they'd vividly reminded her of the water she'd snorkeled in on her family's last vacation. 'Such pretty eyes to hide behind glasses,' she'd thought at the time. 'Shame.'

Buffy felt bad about arguing with him. He'd just been in a rotten mood and she'd made it worse. To add to her guilt, she'd aced the history test, scoring her first perfect 100 in she couldn't remember how long. She impulsively decided to buy him a thank you gift. He'd already helped her raise her grades and he always wore such dull, drab colors. Browns and olives and tans that didn't really suit him at all. 'Medium, I think,' she thought, pursing her lips speculatively as she flipped through the stack of shirts to find the right size.

Purchase acquired and wrapped, she was continuing to the coffee shop to meet Cordy when she noticed the used and out of print booksellers. She'd never been inside before. Musty old place, she thought. 'But really, that's more his kind of gift,' her inner self whispered. She hesitated and then opened the door. She'd have to hurry. Cordy got impatient fast.

'I hoped heartily we should have peace now.' --Nelly

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy had been shocked at how much the rare books cost. She frowned in distaste at them. Most of them were pretty old, some had a torn page or two and a couple even had nasty unidentifiable stains or smells. These could still be pretty pricey depending on the rarity of the book. She assumed the smelly ones must be REALLY rare! That a book was in a condition that was comparably better than the others that existed was important, especially if it was a small printing, the clerk was explaining. The words kept coming, directed at Buffy, but they bounced off of her, unnoticed or absorbed after a certain point. She was virtually word repellent, her mind utterly impervious as her eyes glazed over during the talk of value, investment and specializing a collection.

The nice man was trying to assist her, but it wasn't helping Buffy decide what to get for William. This was much more complicated than it had seemed at first whim. Certainly, she didn't want to spend a ton of money on something antique and icky that he wouldn't like.

The clerk paused, waiting to regain her attention. Buffy abruptly realized the words had stopped and looked up apologetically.

"Perhaps I've started off the wrong way," he said patiently, "Why don't we begin with what the young man likes and then I can tell you what is available. Do you have any ideas as to what he might enjoy reading?"

"Ummm…" Buffy thought for a moment, "He had a paperback that looked pretty beat up of the three somethings by Alexander somebody." She made a face. "Does that sound familiar?"

"Ah," the man brightened, delighted that he had something to go on, "The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas. That is a good book. Plenty of action and adventure to satisfy anyone. It so happens, " he guided her in another direction, "that we have a lovely leather-bound edition of The Count of Monte Cristo, which is also by Dumas," he stopped at a case, "and you'll like it because despite this edition being out of print, it's a new copy. Never been out of the shrink wrap. It isn't rare, but I think you'll find it fits your criteria." He handed her the book, holding his breath slightly.

"Is it good?" Buffy asked, eyeing the navy leather, gold embossed book warily. "It looks kind of thick."

"It is a feature in this case, I assure you, that the story lasts longer," He said quickly. He told her the price.

'Pretty expensive,' thought Buffy, 'for a book.' But this one wasn't silly priced like the ones she'd seen earlier and it was nice looking. It wasn't all old and dirty like the others and the man said the story was good. 'I'll just tell Dad it was payment for tutoring me. He can't argue with that.' She shrugged. 'Plus it's less than the jeans I just bought.' The purchase thus rationalized, she told the man to wrap it up.

Much relieved, he did so. 'Thought that was going to be the hardest customer of the day,' the clerk thought wryly, 'the three somethings, my God…what are they teaching them?' He sniffed slightly as he cut the paper precisely. 'At least the boy has taste.'

Buffy looked at her watch and thought, 'Cordy's going to be so mad! I'll just have to tell her I had a hard time picking something out for my Dad.' She hurried the old clerk up with her eyes, 'C'mon, c'mon…' She whispered internally. Practically snatching it up after paying, she ran out the door, mumbling a hasty thank you.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Drusilla held his hand a moment too long and William gently tugged it away, uncomfortable. She was a pretty girl, he supposed, if you went for the dark, frail type. About average height, an inch or so shorter than William himself in the heels she wore, she looked as though she never ate or possibly only nibbled on a celery stick from time to time. He wondered how long she'd been here, since her skin was pale and translucent, untouched by the California sun. She wore jeans and a thin, long sleeved white blouse with ruffles adorning the wrists and the deep neckline. The romantic, soft look was belied by the sharp black stiletto heeled boots that peeped out from the hems of her jeans. He didn't quite know what to make of her.

"So, William," she said in a low voice, trailing one slim hand over his black T-shirted chest, "I've noticed you come here quite a bit lately. Where did you learn to do all of those-" she waved a languid hand at the bag.

William backed away a step, irritated. "In London," he said shortly.

She looked older than he was, but he couldn't tell how much as her skin was smooth and unlined. It was something about her eyes, he thought, that made him think she was older; they were grey blue with a dreamy haze clouding them but oddly knowing, as if she had secrets to share or withhold.

"Oh London," Drusilla clapped her hands, "another exiled Londoner, so lovely. We can talk all about home together." Completely disregarding William's cues that he was uneasy with the informal touching, she grasped his arm in long pale fingers and led him, somewhat unwilling, to the mats where she'd been sitting.

"I'd barely started-" William protested faintly, with a gesture of his free arm to the bag.

"You can work out any time, no?" Drusilla said persuasively, "How often do you get to talk about home? Anyway, it would be ungentlemanly to leave me so bored, wouldn't it? My father owns this place and won't be finished for hours yet."

'Hours.' William groaned to himself. 'Great.'

"Umm, you look old enough to drive," he said a bit pointedly, "Why are you stuck here?"

Drusilla pouted, "I haven't got a license here yet, nor a car. No one's available to take me home right now and it's so tedious."

William hesitated. Either he would have to talk to her here for unknown "hours" or he could offer to… "Would you like a ride? I can take you home, no problem," he offered.

She smiled at him, pleased, "Oh, would you? That would be wonderful! Let me just go tell Daddy!" With that, she rose and tip-tapped out of the room on her heels.

William sighed. It didn't look like he was going to get a workout today. By the time he got her home, wherever she lived, it would be time to get home for dinner. He went back to the locker to get his bag.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"I sing." Drusilla said abruptly into the silence that had settled over the car, barring instructions to turn this way or that. "I'm singing next Friday at the Bronze. You should come."

"Oh, I'm not old enough for clubs, sorry." William said and thought that was that. 'So she is older,' he thought.

Drusilla laughed, "No silly, you don't have to be twenty one to get in, just to drink." She slid across the seat until she was speaking nearly in his ear. "Well, to drink legally anyway. Such a ridiculous age it is here." She purred, "We're good. It'll be fun, I promise. You should come." The car came to a stop in front of her house and she slid back to the passenger door. He caught the sparkle from a pinpoint diamond dangling from her ear as she swept her hair back again and he realized that her earrings were tiny silver colored skulls with diamond eyes.

Odd choice, he thought, so delicate and grim at the same time. He saw that she was waiting for an answer, "I'll try to make it," he lied.

She grinned, "Come at eight thirty. We go on at nine."

He nodded and waved at her, waiting for her to shut the door.

She stood there, staring at him and mused to herself quietly, "So much under the surface…so much untapped." Smiling again, she said, "Don't forget William. The Bronze at eight thirty on Friday." She shut the door and tapped the roof cheerily in goodbye.

William raised his eyebrows and shook his head as he pulled away from the curb.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

At the library on Monday, William stared at the box and then up at Buffy. "This is for me?" He repeated stupidly.

Buffy smiled nervously, "Sure! For helping me. You've already helped me improve and given me an idea for my English paper and I got a 100 on the history test! Oh I didn't tell you that!" Impulsively, she hugged him quickly. "Thank you!"

He was immersed in her scent for the brief moments she had her arms around him and he closed his eyes and breathed in the subtle perfume of her hair as he relished the softness and warmth of her small body. It was over too fast for him to identify her fragrance. "And…I felt bad that we argued Friday." She stepped back and said, "Go on, open it!"

He opened the taped seams carefully and drew the white box out. Upon opening it, he said, "Oh, um, thank you."

She leaned over him, "Yeah, I know, boys don't think clothes are really gifts, but that color will be so great on you and I just had to buy it when I saw it."

William blinked at her, through the golden strands of her hair hanging near his face, "Well, uh, thank you. It's a very nice shirt," he said awkwardly. He wondered what it meant that she'd bought him clothing. Didn't that mean something, when a girl bought clothing for you?

Buffy laughed at him and handed him a second box, "Here, I got you something else too, 'cause I knew the whole clothes/guy thing…"

He took the second box gingerly, fearing a tie lay inside. 'Wait, do ties count as clothes? She distinctly implied that it wasn't clothes,' he thought. 'No, it's too heavy to be clothes and far too big to be a tie.' He mentally smacked himself, 'Just open it, you wanker.' He applied himself to the tape on the second box and lifted the lid.

"Ohhhh," he breathed, "this is, this is one of my favorites," he said, looking at her with genuine happiness this time. "Thank you."

"Oh," she pouted, "you've read it already?" She made a grab for it, "I can return it and get something else-"

He clutched it to him, "No! No, I love it! Really. It's a great book, an old friend, and I'd love to read it again. Have you read it?" He asked her.

Buffy blushed, "Um, no. I haven't read it. I told the man at the store what you were reading - that three musketeers book and he recommended this one." She looked at him shyly through her lashes, "So it's a good one?"

William set the book down on the table and gathered his courage. He stood up and hugged her gently. "It's a bloody fantastic one. Thank you." Releasing her, he smiled. "You couldn't have chosen better. I'm glad your grades are improving; you've worked hard."

Cordelia rolled her eyes at the two from where she stood in the library stacks and waved a shushing hand at Harmony who stood behind her and looked about to explode. 'Buffy, Buffy, what on earth are you doing?' She thought.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William had changed up his gym schedule, waking earlier in the mornings Saturday and Sunday and going before school this morning instead of afterwards and had so far successfully managed to avoid seeing the strange Drusilla again. He sat ensconced on the couch now, relaxed and studying before dinner.

William looked up as the door opened and his mother walked into the living room. "You ok, Mum?" He asked in concern, noting the weary, drawn look on her face.

"Yes, William, just tired," she said and sank gratefully into the couch beside him.

He studied her face, peering into the blue eyes so like his own, "Would you like anything? A cup of tea, perhaps?" He stood.

His Aunt Jenny appeared in the hall and came in to join them. "Dinner will be ready shortly," she said.

"Oh, thank you, Jenny. Tea would be perfect," Anne responded to William and pressed a hand to her head.

"You sure you're alright?" William repeated his question anxiously.

Jenny moved over to hover near Anne.

Anne paused, then said, "Yes, darling. I'm fine. Tea would be wonderful," she prodded him gently and he left to brew some.

Jenny took Anne's hand and smiled sympathetically at her. "Not a good day?"

Anne shook her head, "No, not a good day," was all she replied.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Angel cornered Buffy at her locker before first period the next day and bending in for a kiss said, "Hey Baby, anything new?"

Buffy kissed him back and grinned at him, "Nope. No newness here. Everything all sameness!" She reached for the book for her first class and was startled when his arms circled her.

"You sure?" He asked her again. "Nothing new you'd like to share?"

She looked at him, puzzled, "No, Angel, why?"

"Oh, I don't know. I hear things…" Angel said coolly. "Like you were hugging somebody in the library the other day who wasn't me?" He teased her, but a hint of steel lay beneath the words.

Buffy blushed, "That was just William," she said, wondering who the heck had seen them in the library. "I passed my history test. Got a 100!" She beamed at him. "He helped me study."

"I'll bet he did," Angel murmured. "That's just great, Baby." He paused, "Maybe you should keep a nice, safe businesslike distance, though, hmm? I don't like hearing my sweet girl is hugging another guy." He kept his tone light, but she sensed things roiling under the surface of that nonchalant tone.

Buffy rolled her eyes at him. "Oh Angel, you know I love you. He's just tutoring me." She squeezed him tighter, "No need to be jealous of William, for goodness sakes."

"All the same-" Angel started.

She looked into his eyes. "Won't happen again." She planted another small kiss on his lips. "C'mon, we're going to be late," and she led him off down the hallway, hand in hand.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

End Note: Please review if you've a moment! :) Thanks.

"I'd as soon put that little canary into the park on a winter's day, as recommend you to bestow your heart on him!...He's not a rough diamond--a pearl-containing oyster of a rustic: he's a fierce, pitiless, wolfish man." --Catherine to Isabella


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*


William touched the soft, blue cotton of the shirt. 'Yeah, why not," he thought, pulling it on and buttoning it.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William had had a pretty good day. It was Thursday, almost the weekend. The study session with Buffy had gone well; she'd been delighted to see him in the shirt and she'd finished writing most of her paper. He was heading for his locker after his last class when he saw a small group standing around the hall, laughing loudly.

"Please, you so shop at Sears." Harmony sniffed. "I think I saw my maid's daughter wearing that sweater. C'mon, it looks like someone skinned Elmo from Sesame Street! Who would choose to wear Elmo fur?" She snickered loudly.

Willow cringed and said, "Excuse me," and tried to make her way past Harmony.

"Hey!" Harmony cried, "You little twit, you pushed me!" She grabbed Willow's arm, spilling her books to the floor.

"I did not!" Willow protested softly.

"I saw the whole thing," Angel said, leaning over her, "You should be more careful. You can't go around shoving people like that, can you now?" Harmony gazed adoringly at him.

"Leave her alone." William said, stepping in between Angel and Willow.

Angel shoved him hard against the locker. "You should have a little more respect, boy and not butt in where you don't belong." His fist tightened in William's shirt. "We own this school. People notice when we're not here. Who would notice if you went missing, huh? Your little red-headed friend, here? Even she's probably never looked at you before today, isn't that right." William looked away and said nothing. "You look at me when I'm talking to you!" He slammed him against the metal again.

Suddenly, small hands grasped Angel’s arm and pulled hard. He looked at the owner of those hands in disbelief. "Buffy, what the hell-"

Green eyes blazed at him. "What did he do, Angel? Not bow his head when you walked down the hall? What did he do to you?" Breathless in her anger, she said, "I'll tell you what he's doing FOR you. He's helping me pass English so I'm not grounded and can go out with you, though at the moment, I can't see why I'd want to." She stood, fierce in her fury, hanging on to his arm, oblivious to the shock of the growing crowd of people and the surprise in Willow's eyes.

William flushed bright red. "Buffy…I'm fine."

She didn't even have enough mass to pull Angel's arm away, but she yanked again, hard, and continued staring into her boyfriend's eyes. "I know you're fine, William. It's Angel who isn't." Her lips firmed into a hard line and she said, "Let him go, Angel. Let him go or I swear to God we're breaking up right now."

"Buffy," Angel said through clenched teeth, "You're making a scene over nothing. I'll talk to you later, when I'm done with Willie, here."

"You're done here now!" she spat. "Or we are. Let. Him. Go." She held his gaze.

Angel's face was a mask of fury. He released William's shirt and gave him one last shove. "Stay out of my way or this won't be over."

He grabbed Buffy tightly by the wrist and wrenched her to him roughly. She winced and thought she could feel the bones shifting. "We're talking. NOW." He dragged her away.

William slumped against the locker and in frustration let his head fall back and hit it once more. He let the fists his hands had been clenched into during the whole encounter relax. He was a mass of conflicted feelings, anger at Buffy for humiliating him by coming to his rescue, affection for her for the same action, more anger…he'd seen her wince when Angel's huge hand had clamped onto her wrist.

He closed his eyes briefly to regain control of himself. He wanted to punch Angel. He wanted to take him down right there in the hallway for everyone to see and introduce him to the bloody floor - or the soon to be bloody floor.

He really wanted to go after them. But he knew he'd only make it worse. Angel wouldn't back down if he went after them and William didn't trust himself. Buffy might be angry at Angel now, but William didn't think she would thank him for reducing her boyfriend to a bloody pulp. Angel wouldn't hurt Buffy. Besides, William had made a promise to his mother.

Even if he just kept putting Angel on the ground and tried not to hurt him, William knew it would start off a chain reaction that would eventually end in disaster. Angel had friends and William did not. He'd be looking at a string of fights that most likely wouldn't end until someone was seriously hurt, or possibly, they all came at him at once. It wasn't that William was afraid; he was perhaps foolishly unafraid, as much as the fact that he couldn't afford to start a mess like that.

'Angel won't hurt Buffy,' he repeated to himself. But if Angel did hurt Buffy, William knew he wouldn't keep his promise. Everything was such a mess. He banged his head again. Would Angel hurt Buffy? He looked in the direction they'd gone, but his internal argument had taken too much time and they'd disappeared.

"Are you ok?" Willow asked him hesitantly.

"No," he said. "No, I'm really not." He cast an unreadable look Willow's way, grabbed his backpack and walked off down the hall.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Angel dragged Buffy into a janitor's closet and slammed the door shut. "Want to tell me what the HELL you thought you were doing out there?" Frustrated, he hit the wall hard enough to send plaster particles floating through the air and create a fist-sized dent.

Buffy was undaunted as she rubbed her sore wrist angrily. "You were picking on him. He's helping me and you were torturing him and I couldn't watch you do it."

"You didn't have to watch, did you?" Angel snarled back. "Could've gone somewhere else, but nooo, little nosy Buffy couldn't let things alone. No, you had to HUMILIATE me in front of most of the school."

"Oh please, Angel," she said in disgust. "There weren't that many people in the hall. Hardly the whole school, so you can cut the drama act."

He grabbed her shoulders and pushed her into the wall. "Don't ever do that again."

"Or you'll what?" Buffy snapped at him.

His mouth came down on hers with bruising fury and he forced his tongue between her lips.

She tried to break away, but his grip was too strong and she had to endure the kiss until he broke it.

He finally pulled away.

"You'll kiss me?" Buffy said shakily, "That's the punishment?" But she looked at him warily, because her wrist really did hurt, she thought something might be sprained or broken or something and he'd scared her with his lack of control. Both she and the wall bore his marks. What else could his fury drive him to?

She ducked under his arm and dashed out of the closet. He let her go.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy sighed into the mirror the next morning. The long sleeved green shirt she was wearing was lightweight, but still looked a little odd since it was still pretty warm out outside of the school air conditioning. Her wrist was a mass of black and blue that she didn't want to have to explain to anyone. It still hurt too.

She sighed and went downstairs to the kitchen, where her mother was just packing up for work.

Her mother handed her a box of frames to carry outside and Buffy automatically grabbed and then dropped it, exclaiming in pain. "Buffy, what-" Joyce looked at her eldest in concern. Buffy's sleeve rode up and Joyce saw the bruises. "Buffy, what happened?" Joyce cradled her daughter's wrist gently.

Buffy took a deep breath…and lied. "It was at cheerleading yesterday. I was balancing and lost my footing and Brian grabbed me to keep me from falling."

"Honey, this looks bad. It could be broken." Joyce looked at her watch and got her purse. "Come on, we're going to the emergency room." She placed a hand on Buffy's shoulder and guided her out to the car.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

It was broken. Now she had a cast on her wrist and no hope for cheerleading in the near future.

"Mom, I can still cheer," Buffy protested. "I can do some things. I just can't do the flips or the pyramids or the…" her voice trailed off as the list of things she couldn't do grew in her mind. "Ok, maybe I can't."

Glancing over and seeing the tears in Buffy's eyes, Joyce said, "It's just until your wrist heals, dear. It's not a bad break, the doctor said it may only take a few weeks to a month to heal." She looked sympathetically at Buffy, "But you know you can't rush it or it'll just make it worse and take longer."

"I know," Buffy sighed and slumped down into the seat miserably.

"At least it's not your writing hand," Joyce said comfortingly, "You can still do your schoolwork."

"Joy," Buffy said grimly.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy was late. Also, he hadn't seen her all day. William looked up at the sound of the doors and she entered the room, devoid of any trademark Buffy bounce. It was a subdued and colorless version of Buffy who mumbled a quiet "Hi," and sat beside him.

He saw her wrist and froze. His jaw tightened. 'I'm going to kill that bloody bastard,' he thought and before he knew what he was doing, he'd leapt from his seat, knocking the chair backwards and taken several steps towards the door.

Buffy jumped after him and grabbed his arm with her good hand, "No," she said quietly but firmly. She raised her eyes to his. "I just saw him. He didn't mean to hurt me, he just doesn't know his own strength and he was angry. He's already apologized a billion times." She smiled humorlessly, "According to the doctor, I have delicate bones. That's what he told my Mom anyway when she asked how this could happen. It was an accident."

"You tell your Mum what happened, then?" William asked.

"No," she admitted. "Mom would freak out."

"Yeah and rightly so." He reached to pluck her hand off his sleeve.

"No!" Buffy repeated, holding on tightly. "That's how all of this started, isn't it?" she said, her voice rising. Fortunately, the library was empty.

"I didn't ask you to-" William said hotly.

"What, you think it would be so much better if I'd let him break you into tiny pieces for the janitor to clean up?" Buffy shouted at him.

He gritted his teeth, "You automatically assume-" He tried again to free himself.

"Look, it won't happen again," Buffy said more calmly.

"Yeah, I'm sure it won't," he said bitterly. "Don't you know-"

She didn't let him finish. "It won't happen again because I said I wanted us to take a break." She sighed wearily, green eyes unusually clouded and dim. "He scared me," she said softly. "He was so angry. I accepted his apology, but I told him we're taking a break," she repeated. "He was mad, but-" Buffy bit her lip. "Please, the last thing I want is more of this. Please, William."

He relented, seeing the exhaustion on her face.

"Anyway, not like you could storm into his math class, which is where he is right now," Buffy said. "C'mon." She tugged him back in the direction of the table.

He followed her, but inside he promised himself that he'd settle it with Angel at a later time. This thought soothed him somewhat. Neither of them was able to concentrate well, each lost in their own thoughts.

'Nothing - only look at the almanac on that wall;' he pointed to a framed sheet hanging near the window, and continued, 'The crosses are for the evenings you have spent with the Lintons, the dots for those spent with me. Do you see? I've marked every day.'

'Yes - very foolish: as if I took notice!' replied Catherine, in a peevish tone. 'And where is the sense of that?'

'To show that I DO take notice,' said Heathcliff. --Conversation between Catherine and Heathcliff

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

'We were quarrelling like cats about you, Heathcliff;' Catherine to Heathcliff about Isabella and herself


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"Come on, Buffy. You should go," Buffy's friend Michelle wheedled. "You need a little fun."

Buffy was silent into the receiver, then said, "He'll be there, 'Chelle. You know he will be. Cordy said she, Harm, Angel and Tom were going."

"Yeah, he'll be there, but who cares. Riley and Parker are going with us and Kelly and Sean too. We'll get our own table. We don't have to sit with him. There's supposed to be a good band tonight."

Buffy sighed. "Ok, just give me an hour or so and pick me up then?"

"We'll be there!" Michelle hung up.

Buffy stared at her closet, unmotivated.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William was worried. It was going on eight o'clock and no one was home yet. He tried his mother's cell phone again - no answer.

The door closed quietly behind him and he whirled. "Jenny, what's going on? Where's Mum?"

Jenny took him by the shoulders and steered him over to the couch. "William-" she started.

"Where is she? What's wrong?" He didn't let her get very far, getting more agitated by the moment.

Jenny looked at him with compassionate eyes. "Your mother is in the hospital."

He shot up and headed for his keys, but she held his arm and pulled him back to the couch. "She's sleeping. There's no use going over to the hospital now. You can see her in the morning," she assured him gently.

"What's wrong with her, Jenny?" William asked her, eyes pleading for information.

Jenny sighed. "William, back in London, shortly before your father's death, she was diagnosed with a particularly invasive form of cancer. Your parents didn't want to worry you and then when your father died, well…"

A hint of tears glimmered in his eyes. "How could she not tell me? How could she? Is she-" William finished the question wordlessly, looking at his aunt.

"There's always hope, William," Jenny said carefully. "The doctors can't predict how things will progress in every person. Your mother had hopes-" her voice caught, then steadied, "she had hoped she would improve, but it's not looking good right now." She’d tried to break the news as gently as possible, but knew this was hitting William hard.

"Jenny, I can't…" William broke loose and ran up the stairs, taking them two at a time.

Once in his room, though he'd stripped off his shirt and prepared to flop on his bed, he found he couldn't stop pacing. He paced and paced, nervous energy, frustration, anger and fear all coursing through his body. 'Can't stay here all night, mate. You'll go mad. Gym's not open, so that's not an option.' He made a snap decision, left Jenny a note on his bed, threw on one of his black workout shirts over his jeans and climbed out the window.


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy sat at the table surrounded by her friends, feeling lonely nonetheless. Her shiny blonde hair was loose around her shoulders, her makeup subtle, her new blue halter and not so new mini were perfect and her core group was fractured in two at her own hands. Angel and company sat at a table nearer the stage and she'd caught him shooting looks in her direction even as Harmony fawned all over him. 'Why did I agree to come?' She wondered miserably.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William found Dru a few minutes before she was due on stage. She kissed his cheek and then patted it fondly. "So happy you could come, William." She turned to the waitress nearby and said, "Would you set him up at that table I reserved?" The waitress nodded and guided William away.

He was seated at a table near the stage but off to one side and the waitress brought him something that looked like a coke. He supposed Dru had ordered it for him. He thanked her and sniffed it dubiously. 'What the hell,' he thought and drank it down. It tasted like liquid fire as it burned his way down to his stomach. 'Not sure what that was, but not much of it was coke.' He had momentary misgivings, but he quashed them and focused on the stage. The lights had dimmed and a spot shone on the middle. The waitress set another drink in front of him and he drank it absently.

Dru slinked out to center stage, wrapping her hands around the microphone. Tonight she was wearing a filmy black blouse, cut the same way as the other he'd seen her in, black leather pants and the seemingly ever present stiletto boots. She smiled in his direction and began. "I'm Dru," she purred into the mic, "that's Faith on guitar, Oz on bass and Devon on the drums." She waved her arm at each in turn and continued, "We're Haunted Exile." With that she started in on her first song. "This is Breathless." The music began, eerie, with a low beat behind it and she sang,

"You've stolen my breath
away
Brought me to death
and say
You don't love me and
I know
You hold me at hand
but don't
want me

You leave me breathless,
the poison in my veins
I can do nothing,
to ease its bitter pains
I lie there broken…"

Dru continued to croon out the sad lyrics in beautiful plaintive tones which seemed to strike right at the center of William's grief numbed heart, making him resonate with her desperation. She hadn't lied. They were good.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

'Ugh, perfect. Depression rock,' thought Buffy. 'Isn't that just appropriate.' Several of her friends had gotten up to dance and glancing at the dance floor Buffy's jaw gaped open in shock. There was Cordelia, her best friend since forever, hanging all over her so recently ex-boyfriend. Angel's face was smug as he slid his hands over Cordelia's curves.

Buffy was beyond stunned. She felt the tears rise up and blur her vision. Suddenly, she felt a warm hand clasp hers. Riley said softly, "Would you like to dance?"

Buffy had never felt less like dancing in her life. She wanted to run from the room and all the way home to her bedroom to cry. "Sure," she said weakly and rose to go with him.


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Suddenly William's attention was distracted from Dru's hypnotically sinuous movements by a flash of blonde hair. 'Buffy,' he thought, though it could have been any blonde really, he was starting to feel a bit hazy after so many drinks on an empty stomach. But no, it wasn't. It was Buffy. He edged a bit out of the booth and started to go to her, unthinking, and then he noticed the tall boy dancing with her. 'I thought she…' A muscle twitched in his jaw at her lie, but then her partner turned and he saw that it wasn't Angel. 'Oh Finn,' he thought bitterly, 'Give her a day and another one queues up. Throngs of bloody replacement git boyfriends on command.' He signaled the waitress for another drink.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy was in the ladies room, where she'd retreated after several dances with Riley. She touched up the makeup around her eyes, carefully blotting at the tearstains. 'I won't let them see me cry,' she thought defiantly.

The door opened and Cordelia sauntered in. "Hello Buffy," she said casually.

Buffy's resolutions dispersed into sheer fury at her former friend. "Cordelia."

Cordelia began to reapply her noticeably smudged lipstick.

"Harmony wants him, huh, Cordy?" Buffy spat at her.

"Well, we know for sure that you don't," Cordy replied calmly, twisting the lipstick closed. "Why let a perfectly good guy go to waste?"

"How could you, Cordy?" Buffy said angrily. "There are- I'm pretty sure there are rules about this!" Her voice rose.

"Look, Buffy," Cordelia said, "You broke up with HIM. I like him. What's wrong with that?" She shrugged.

"Only everything and you can't see it," Buffy retorted and slammed through the door, where she bumped into William coming out of the men's room.

Not seeing who it was, she tried to go around him.

"Oh yeah, that's right. Can't be seen with me," William said bitterly. "Run away before someone sees."

She froze.

"Hey!" Riley shouted, "Leave her alone. Is he bothering you, Buffy?"

"Yeah, is he bothering you?" Angel appeared on William's other side.

"No…no…" Buffy stammered, but the tears were visible in her eyes.

The three men glared at each other.

William was oddly amused. He could see Riley was torn over who he wanted to hit more. William wanted to hit either or both, really anyone at this point, didn’t care who it was. "You can have her, bloody stuck-up bint she is," he said cruelly.

Fresh tears emerged in Buffy's eyes and Riley took a swing at William. William ducked easily and shot a jab at Riley's jaw. It connected and he went down.

'That's it, one at a time,' William had a second to think before he saw Angel move in his peripheral vision.

Even slowed by the alcohol, William was faster than the larger man. Angel's rush was evaded and as he swung around, maddened, for another try, William planted a kick in his midsection, sending him to the floor.

He dropped low and with a leg sweep took out Riley again. William was bouncing on his toes in glee, taking each as they rose from the floor, the fight becoming a violent dance in which he lost himself. He let himself go, freed from the last remnants of self control and damned if it didn't feel bloody good.

It only lasted a few minutes more before the bouncers broke it up, grabbing each standing participant and holding them away from each other. Angel lay on the floor where William had left him, clutching his head.

"Wow, dude, you spiked his head like a volleyball," Devon commented.

The fight left William and with it went all of his energy. He slumped a little, taking in the blurry sight of Buffy's tearful face and her hands on Riley's arm. Suddenly, he was glad he hadn't hurt Riley too badly, git only thought he was defending Buffy and William probably would've done the same in Riley's position. He was also glad that he had hurt Angel, as long as he hadn't done permanent damage. He stared at Angel dispassionately.

He felt blood trickling down into his eye and realized his glasses were broken. Cool hands wrapped around his bicep. "I'll take him, John," Drusilla said to the bouncer.

"Dru, we may need to call the police-" the bouncer said.

"Hey man, they attacked him, two against one, I saw it," Devon said.

The bouncer raised an eyebrow at William. "Yeah?" He looked around. "Ok then, Dru, but you've only finished one set."

Dru shrugged at him. "I'll make it up to you next week or whenever you want. Tell Ed we'll play for free." He nodded in acknowledgement and let William go.

"Come with me, my...Spike," Dru whispered softly, "let's get you home and cleaned up." She swiftly made arrangements for a ride with Devon and led him out.

Buffy watched them leave.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William let the darkness envelop him in the backseat of the car. He slipped away, stroked into unconsciousness by Dru's soothing touch.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

End Note: Ok, so I know nothing about fights or martial arts so "go me" on making one of my characters adept at combat. Did my best, kindly pardon any mistakes :) Ditto with any medical info. Suspend disbelief please! Reviews are much appreciated!

'Did she say she was grieved?' he inquired, looking very serious. (Heathcliff)

'She cried when I told her you were off again this morning.' (Nelly)

'Well, I cried last night,' he returned, 'and I had more reason to cry than she.' (Heathcliff)


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William woke confused and groggy. The last thing he remembered was being helped from the car and into Dru's over-the-garage apartment. Dru's face had hovered over him and she'd gently opened his lips and pressed something small into his mouth. "Take this, my sweet boy and you'll sleep away the pain." He swallowed reflexively.

Bits and pieces and snatches of conversation swirled in and out after that, a male voice…maybe that guy Devon saying, "You sure you want to do that? I don't think-". Then Dru saying something unintelligible and an unidentifiable female voice, "Hey, we don't tell you how to play! Go on…"

Then nothing. Until now. He took a deep breath. Even that hurt. He brought a hand to his head, his scalp felt...funny somehow, raw and tingly. Flashes of the fight came back to him and he wondered if he'd hit his head. He remembered what he'd said to Buffy and groaned.

Why was everything still so blurry? 'Oh yeah, right, glasses broke,' he thought. Suddenly, the reason he'd been out in the first place came back to him. He bolted upright. 'Mum. Have to get to the hospital. Wonder what time it is. Stupid git, getting drunk and passing out, probably worrying Jenny to death.' He berated himself mentally as he squinted and tried to force his still hazy brain to figure out how to get to his mother the fastest.

Beside him, Dru stirred lazily. "Are you up then, my Spike?" She said sleepily.

"Your…" It came back to him, "Don't call me that. It sounds like a dog's name." William swung his legs over the side of the bed. For a brief minute he thought he ought to be shocked waking up half dressed in the bed of a girl he barely knew, but all he could think about was his mother. "Erm…look, I need to bypass all of the conversation that should probably happen right now and skip directly to the part where I tell you that my mother is in hospital; I've apparently broken my glasses so I can't see; I left my car at the Bronze and if you could help me get to her, I'll be your slave for life." He rubbed his head and his hair felt strange too, it was sticking up in all directions. "Please. What time is it? Have you seen my mobile?"

Dru stretched and sat up. "Slave for life. I could use one of those," she said dreamily. Then waking up a little, she glanced at the clock, "It's a quarter to ten. Mobile…don't know, maybe over there on the chair with your shirt. Glasses - I'll see if I can drag Devon out of bed and get him to drive us to the mall. There should be a place there." She put her hand on his bare shoulder. "Mother in hospital - I'm sorry." She patted him comfortingly, "Clean up, mall, walk to the Bronze when you can see and pick up your car. Sound good?"

"Yeah." He scrubbed his hands through his hair again.

Dru got up, pointed him to the bathroom and continued on to Devon's room for the difficult process of waking her brother. He and Faith lay entwined on his bed, deeply asleep. She was saved waking them when a yell erupted from the bathroom and jolted them awake.

"What the BLOODY HELL?" William shouted.

"Oh, he's seen our surprise," Dru clasped her hands together and grinned. Faith snickered drowsily.

"Dru, get out of here," Devon growled, "and I told you you shouldn't have done that. Don't look to me to help you now."

"Faith helped!" Dru pouted. "Can't get out, dearest. Need you up and driving. It's an emergency of sorts." Dru prodded his shoulder, nudging him further awake.

Devon grumbled, but detached himself from Faith, who merely mumbled, turned and went back to sleep. "Oh, you so owe me," he said.

"Owe you kisses," Dru chirped and planted one on his cheek, leaving the room. "See you in fifteen minutes or so?"

"Yeah." Devon shook his head grumpily, as though trying to shake the remainder of sleepiness out.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Dru pushed the slightly ajar bathroom door open further and saw William, head in hands, hanging over the sink.

"Like it?" She asked.

He raised his head and looked at her in disbelief, seeing only a fuzzy Dru-shaped outline. "What the hell did you do?"

"Bleached it," Dru said matter-of-factly. "Looks better this way," she added helpfully. "Oz's leftovers. He changes his hair color a lot." She tilted her head at him thoughtfully, "Not that blue mightn't have looked good too…oh well."

"So you-" he shook his head, "No, you know what- I don't care right now. Don't have time. Could you find some clothes I could borrow? These are…" he looked in distaste at his jeans, "bloody, I think. Can't see her like this."

"I'll get you some. Here's a towel." Dru left the room.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William had called his aunt and groveled, apologizing profusely for making her worry and telling her about his glasses, although not how they'd been broken. He told her he'd be at the hospital as soon as he could see again. She was already at the hospital and assured him that nothing had changed with regard to his mother's condition and in fact, due to the drugs they had her on, his mother was drifting in and out of consciousness.

Now, he and Dru were waiting at the optometrist's. She'd insisted on staying with him. Saturdays seemed pretty busy, but he'd told the pleasant receptionist some of his situation and she'd managed to fit him in.

"Well, dear, she can take you now." The receptionist said, "But you know glasses take a few hours on busy days. Have you considered contacts? We can fit you for them and give you some samples to wear and take with you today while your order comes through."

William hesitated only a moment and then waved his hand, uncaring, "Whatever is fastest. Thank you very much for fitting me in."

The woman nodded and taking his newly filled out chart, led him into the examining rooms in the back.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

He plunked his emergency credit card down on the counter. 'That was kind of expensive,' he thought, 'Had no choice, though. I'll pay it back somehow. May need a job, especially now…' He signed and handed the slip to the receptionist.

"I do hope your mother feels better soon, dear." She smiled at him and he weakly returned the smile.

He turned to Dru, waiting, if not patiently, then at least quietly, flipping through a children's magazine. He peered at her and saw she was looking at one of those 'find the hidden pictures' pages. She looked up at him and smiled. "Oh, my Spike, so handsome. Much better than those wretched glasses." She stood. "Bronze?"

"Don't call me that." William repeated wearily. "Yeah Bronze, let's go."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

He liked the contacts. Even in his worried, distressed state, he could appreciate the peripheral vision improvement, though his face felt somehow naked without the glasses.

When they'd arrived at the hospital, Jenny had postponed any talk of punishment or questions about the previous night and his new hair until later. She thought the poor boy had been through enough. She'd offered to take Dru home for him, while he waited for his mother to awaken.

Dru had surprised him by leaving quietly with a very normal though unsolicited, hug and a light caress on his cheek. He still didn't know what to make of her, one moment a normal, seemingly sensitive girl and the next a mad chit who dyed strangers' hair while they were defenseless. He consciously postponed thinking about her until later.

The only thing that mattered now was his mother.

She lay still and fragile looking underneath the white hospital sheets. Her sharp cheekbones jutted out prominently under her papery, white skin. He wondered when she'd gotten so thin and how he hadn't noticed. He chastised himself for not knowing something was wrong earlier. Then he got angry at her all over again for not telling him about her illness. 'How could she keep that from me?' He'd bought a baseball cap to cover his now startlingly white hair and dull the shock a little for his mother, but he swept it off now and ran his hands through his hair as he always did when he was anxious.

Anne squinted. "Who are you?" She asked softly of the white haired stranger at her bedside.

He grasped her hand, "Mum, it's me, William. I'll explain later," he said hurriedly, not at all sure how he would manage that. "How are you feeling?"

She moved her dry lips slowly, "William." She spoke again, "Thirsty. I'm thirsty. Is there-"

"Here, Mum." He helped her to adjust the bed and pillows to sit up a little, poured a glass of water and held it to her lips.

She sipped the water he held for her and then turned her face slightly to the side to indicate she was finished. Her blue eyes cleared a little as the drugged sleep receded, "William," she looked at him, "You're hurt," she raised her hand to his brow and he saw her immediate anxiety.

"I'm ok, Mum. It's nothing." He said quickly, eyes silently begging her to drop it for now.

Gazing at his face, she said, "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you. I know this must be a shock to you and-"

"Why didn't you?" Tears formed in his eyes.

She sighed. "Well, the doctors were being grim about the whole thing. They weren't giving me very much hope. We decided it was best…then your father-" She looked down at her hands. "I didn't know how to tell you, darling. All I could do was move here. Jenny wanted to help us and I knew she'd be there for you if-"

"No! You aren't leaving me too!" He said fiercely. "You can't leave me, Mum. You can't-" His voice broke and he put his head in her lap, where her hands stroked her son's strange, newly white hair gently.

"I don't want to leave you, William." She said softly. "I haven't given up. I'd never leave you willingly, you know that." She paused, "But sometimes there are things beyond our control."

William was a boy, almost a man and he prided himself on his self control and strength.

He wept in his mother's lap.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy was worried. Angel was in school. In the end, he hadn't been hurt severely, though his pride was considerably dented, which was probably the only reason he wasn't filing a charge against William. Riley had bumps and bruises from being knocked around, but was otherwise fine and also in attendance. William was the only one who had yet to make an appearance, which wasn't like him. He never missed school, was never even late. Could he have been hurt worse than he looked? She still couldn't believe he'd somehow survived, let alone won, a fight with both Angel and Riley.

She sat in the library during sixth period, tapping her foot anxiously. She'd known he probably wouldn't show up, the period was half gone now and he'd been so angry with her on Friday. But she'd come anyway and sat and waited to no avail.

She glanced around the room. 'Ah,' she thought, 'that redhead, that's the girl he was defending from Angel.' She frowned at the girl speculatively for a moment, said girl obliviously wrapped up in something on her laptop. She decided that finding out where William was was more important than wondering about what the girl was to him.

She crossed the room with confidence. "Hi." She sat down next to Willow. "You don't know me, I mean we've never talked, but well," Buffy paused, "this is going to sound weird, but I have a favor to ask you."

Willow looked up, startled. She knew, of course, who Buffy was, but couldn't think why the other girl would be talking to her. "Oh, um…hi. Favor?" She stammered, "Um, what uh, favor could I do for you?"

"You know William, right?" Buffy asked intently.

Willow nodded.

"Well, he's absent and I'm worried he might be…" Buffy didn't want to go into everything, "I'm worried about him. He's not in school and I need to know where he lives." She was uncertain whether he'd take a phone call from her now.

"Um…" Willow said, "I'm sorry, I don't know him all that well. I mean he sits with us, but I don't know where he lives."

Buffy patted the laptop meaningfully, "Yeah, but you're good with this, right? I mean, you can do stuff, find stuff…" She prompted Willow.

"Yeah, I mean, yeah." Willow said, "I can look up his address for you if you want."

Buffy wrinkled her nose, "Well, see that's the problem. I know he lives with his aunt, but I don't know her last name. So we can't just look him up. We'll need to look at his school records." She looked hopefully at Willow.

Willow flushed. "Umm…that would be wrong, wouldn't it? I mean, we could get in trouble-"

"No one will get in trouble. I just want to see if he's ok." Buffy stared at her, "Please. If you can-" she fumbled for the right words, "can't you hack into something or something like that?"

Willow was on firmer ground here. She studied Buffy warily, wondering if this was some sort of trick, but Buffy seemed sincere. "Well, I could," she said and saw the fleeting hope that surfaced in Buffy's eyes. "I could probably do that, but-"

"Oh please!" Buffy begged, thinking Willow was going to refuse. "I'm really worried about him. He never misses school."

"Well, I was just going to say that I could probably hack in, but that's not necessary. Mrs. Perry leaves her password on a post-it note on her monitor." She continued, frowning, "But I don't know how I could get to her computer without someone noticing."

"C'mon." Buffy motioned. "I'll ask Giles for some hall passes. You worry about the typing and I'll handle the distracting."

When they reached the office, Buffy put on her most disarming smile and said to the woman behind the desk, "Hi Mrs. Perry! Could you explain the difference between early action and early decision admissions again? I'm confused." She drew the woman off to the side and kept her occupied, while Willow quietly slipped in behind her to her desk. A few moments later it was done.

"Hey, thanks a lot for helping me sort that out, Mrs. Perry!" Buffy said quickly, wrapping it up. She grabbed Willow and they fled.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Willow had little difficulty persuading Xander to give them a ride to William's house after school. It was a nice sized nondescript grey house in a decent part of town with a well kept yard and lawn. Now they were parked in the driveway, Buffy hovering uncertainly by the opened car door.

"Um," she licked her lips nervously, not having gotten to this part of the plan yet. "I'll be right back. Thanks."

She knocked on the door and a dark haired woman answered.

"Mrs. Pratt?" Buffy asked politely.

"No. I'm Jenny Rayne. Are you a friend of William's?" Jenny asked.

"Yes." Buffy said to herself, 'I'm not lying! I am his friend, he just apparently doesn't know it.' She said, "I'm Buffy Summers. Is he in? He wasn't in school today and we wondered-"

Jenny's kind face looked tired and sad and she said, "He's at the hospital with his mother. He's been there for days and I can't get him to come home." She eyed the little blonde girl, "Perhaps you could persuade him to come home and at least sleep for awhile?"

"Oh! The hospital! Is she ok?" Buffy's face fell. "I'm so sorry. He's had-"

Jenny replied, "No. I'm afraid she isn't really ok."

Buffy's eyes filled with tears. "Poor William. Um, could you give me the hospital and-" She got the rest of the information and rushed back to the car to tell Willow and Xander.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*


Buffy stared at the figure hunched in the uncomfortable, molded plastic, hospital waiting area chair. He didn't look like the William she knew, with the hair, missing glasses and the rumpled shirt and baggy jeans that hung loosely on him. But she plucked up her nerve and headed towards him. He was still the boy who'd helped her, whatever he looked like. Now she would help him.

"William," she said, quietly touching his shoulder to get his attention.

He raised his head from his hand and looked at her without recognition for a moment.

"How's your mother?" She asked him softly.

He sighed and didn't question either her presence or knowledge of his mother's condition, just accepted both dully. "They took her for some tests. Be some time yet before they bring her back."

She took in his torn eyebrow and gaunt, exhausted face. The piercing look of desperation in his deep blue eyes made her heart ache. "When was the last time you ate or slept?" She asked. "Or showered?" She said, wrinkling her nose slightly.

"I-" William mumbled, "I don't know. I-"

Her lips pressed together in determination and she tugged him up gently. "C'mon. If she won't be out for a while yet, you can leave word with the nurse and at least go home and get cleaned up and change." She pulled again insistently and he finally complied, getting to his feet like an old man.

She led him over to where Willow and Xander stood awkwardly by the wall. "Your car's here?" She asked William and at his nod, said, "I'm taking him home. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Thank you for your help." She said earnestly to them both.

There was a slight disagreement at the car, with Buffy insisting on driving, saying that he was in no condition to do so. He reluctantly handed over the keys and sagged into the passenger seat.

She took a deep breath and thanked God it was an automatic transmission. 'I can do this,' she said to herself, 'I took the lessons. No problem.' She inserted the key in the ignition and put the car in reverse.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William was glad he didn't care too much about his own wellbeing at the moment. Buffy drove like a maniac. He listlessly directed her to his house, as she hadn't been paying attention to the roads earlier. He was too tired to wonder at Buffy's presence and actions, instead he rested his head against the cool glass of the window and let her drive him home.


Please review if you have the time :) Thank you.

"Proud people breed sad sorrows for themselves."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy followed William up the stairs silently. Jenny had left to go to the hospital on their arrival, asking Buffy to please make William eat something. Buffy had nodded and headed to the stairs that William was already ascending.

He opened the door to his room and she trailed in after him. 'Ok,' Buffy thought. 'Wouldn't have expected the Sex Pistols poster.' She had expected the packed bookshelves and neat stacks of books on the floor where they had obviously overflowed. The room was somewhat sad. Save the one poster, nothing else adorned the walls which were a flat, plain white. Other than books, he had little in the room, just a bed neatly covered in a personality free blue striped duvet. She noted the short stack of CDs in one corner next to a small stereo. The book she'd given him lay on his lone nightstand next to a couple small picture frames. Compared to the clutter of the rooms of most of her friends and, she admitted, her own room, it was practically bare.

He was sitting on the corner of the bed, head down. She went over to him.

"Ok, you need to shower first. You'll feel better after you shower." She said to him and ignored the look of disbelief he shot her at her words. That look conveyed wordlessly and effectively his feeling that nothing could make him feel better, let alone a mere shower.

He remained motionless. Seeing that he wasn't about to move, Buffy went back into the hall in search of a linen closet. Finding it, she grabbed a towel and walked back to him.

"You. Shower. Now." She said firmly, pushing the towel at him. He let himself fall back on the bed, disregarding the offered towel, letting it lie, still folded, on his chest.

Buffy frowned in exasperation. She would make him do this. She grabbed one arm with her good one and managed with great effort to drag him back to a sitting position. Moving the towel, she yanked at the bottom of his t-shirt, with one hand and began to pull it over his head. Halfway up, he got annoyed at her awkward fumbling and pulled it over his head himself. He still didn't acknowledge anything, just sat staring dully at the floor.

Inappropriate thoughts crossed her mind. 'Who would've thought that was under there?' She noticed the smooth slabs of muscle across his chest and well defined abs. She shook herself mentally, 'Not exactly the time for that, Buffy!' and filed the information away for later perusal.

"Up." Buffy commanded, doing her best to assist him one-handed. He shot her a full on glare this time, but acquiesced and got to his feet without complaint. She grabbed the towel again and shoved it at him, waiting this time until he brought his hands up slowly to take it. She turned him around. "I like you William, but you're going to have to do the rest yourself." She said staunchly and then realized she had no idea which way to push him. He looked at her blankly for a second and then went off in the direction of the bathroom.

She waited until she heard the shower turn on and descended the stairs in search of the kitchen.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy had thought her culinary skills would be up to making a sandwich, but she realized she knew nothing about what William liked on one. So she left the cold cuts alone and extended her search of the refrigerator. 'Aha!' She thought triumphantly. 'Leftover lasagna. That'll work.' She removed the container and set about heating it up, even putting a little of the bagged salad from the crisper on the side. She pondered dressings and finally chose an inoffensive oil and vinegar.

She covered the meal with foil and waited.

After fifteen minutes, she realized he wasn't coming down. 'Damn it.' She thought. 'Well, he'll have to eat lukewarm pasta and salad.' She snatched the plate and a cold coke and went upstairs in search of him.

After another twenty minutes of sitting on his bed with no sign of him, she started to get nervous. What was he doing? What was taking so long? Had he fallen asleep in there?

She followed the sound of the shower in the hall to a door. "William?" She called out.

No answer.

"William, you're scaring me. If you don't answer me or come out, I'm coming in!" Buffy declared loudly.

No answer.

"Great." Buffy muttered. She tried the door handle halfheartedly. Locked. Of course.

Oh, but the lock was the same type they had at her house. That she could deal with. After years of sharing a bathroom with her selfish, hot water and mirror hogging sister, she had a ton of practice at this.

She went back to the bedroom and got a wire hanger from his closet. She straightened out the hook carefully and with difficulty, 'Stupid cast,' she thought, and stuck it in the little hole.

The lock popped open obediently with a satisfying click. "Last chance, William!" She called hopefully, "If you don't answer me, I'm coming in!" Her threats went unheard or unheeded and there was no sound from the bathroom.

She took a deep breath and opened the door. The room was cloudy with steam and she took a moment to figure out where everything was, carefully peeping through a crack in the fingers of the hand which she held to her eyes. "Ok…I'm in here." Buffy said. "Where are you?"

She took the towel she'd given him from the hook on the wall and headed apprehensively for the tub. The curtain was opaque. 'Thank God,' she thought and then realized that it didn't matter. He still hadn't answered her, so she was going to have to draw it back. Bracing the towel between her bad wrist and hip, she closed her eyes and pulled the curtain back a tiny bit.

No shriek of outrage met her action. 'Ok, that's good.' Buffy thought, eyes still shut, 'No, wait, that's bad. What the hell's wrong with him?'

She sighed and peeped in past the curtain. "Oh God." He was curled in a ball on the bottom of the tub, facing away from her. The water had run cold, but he didn't seem to be aware of it. It must've turned cold recently, because the room was still steamy. She dropped the towel and quickly turned off the taps. 'Now what to do,' she thought frantically. 'Sooooo not equipped for this.' Gamely, she got the towel off the floor and dropped it on him, giving him enough coverage for decency. 'Uh, more towels.' The one she'd placed on him was already getting damp on the edges as it drifted in the water around him. She scrambled to get a couple more.

Returning, she was still at a loss. 'What am I doing here?' She thought furiously to herself, 'I'm no good at comforting people. Not a strong suit. My tubside manner sucks, really.'

Was he sleeping? Had he not slept in days? How could you fall asleep with cold water pouring down on you? Had he passed out? She had no idea. 'C'mon Buffy, he could be in trouble or something.' She forced herself forward again, armed with her towels, and knelt by the tub.

Dropping the towels, she reached out a hand and gently patted at his head, tousling the wet curls there. "William," she said softly. "C'mon, William, are you ok?" He moaned and turned his head to her, brilliant blue eyes opening and blinking at the overhead light. 'Oh, good. He's alive." Buffy thought, relieved. This thought led to, 'He's alive and totally naked and I'm like two feet from him.' Blushing, she said, "Can you sit up? I'm not sure what happened. Did you pass out, do you think? Did you bump your head or something? Are you ok?" She pelted his impassive form with words as the stream of babble escaped her lips.

He brought his hand to his head slowly, twisting his body slightly. She panicked, readjusted the towel on him with a swift flick and retreated. He sat up. "Yeah. I'm ok. Not sure, must've fallen asleep."

She saw the moment everything came back to him and the realization of the current situation hit him. He too blushed, suffusing his face with red. "Um."

Buffy hastily took a spare towel and put it on his head, rubbing gently at his hair as best she could and averting her eyes. "Yeah, um. You didn't answer and the water was all cold and I know how to open these locks and well I got worried and-"

"Got another towel there, pet? This one's wet." He asked her quietly.

"Yes! Towel. Right here. Right…yeah." Buffy took her hand off his head and handed him the other towel. "Um, you ok now? 'Cause I could uh, let you get up and dry off and…you're probably cold..." She clumsily got up from her knees and backed out of the room hastily.

"Yes. I'm ok. Be right out." He said, closing his eyes in embarrassment.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

'Hmmm.' Buffy thought. 'If I had a brain, it would've clued me in that naked William had no clothes in the bathroom and would be coming in here shortly in a TOWEL. Then, maybe I would've done the decent thing and LEFT THE ROOM to give him some privacy.' She gaped at him silently for a minute as he appeared in the doorway and smacked down the part of her mind that piped up that it didn't really mind seeing William in a towel.

She could just hear the conversation now, 'Hey, William, I know your Mom's sick and all, but it's strange, I suddenly noticed how surprisingly hot you are under those unattractive clothes you wear all the time and-' Another mental smackdown. 'Not the time! Soooooo not the time! Maybe never the time!' She repeated to the offending voice in her head. 'What's wrong with you anyway!'

Oblivious to her inner monologue, he scrunched up his eyes and peered at her.

"Uh, I just wanted to tell you that I left some food here for you." She motioned to the plate on the bed next to her. "And a drink." Another gesture at the nightstand. "And uh, I reheated it, so it should be kinda warm and I'll just go downstairs and maybe you can come down there when you've got stuff on…and stuff." Buffy got up, "Oh and if you don't like it, there's other stuff downstairs and just tell me and I'll get something else and…yeah-" she brushed past him as she exited through the doorway. She shivered and hastened down the stairs.

William thought these were quite possibly some of the worst and also most confusing few days he'd ever had, though the number of those was growing rapidly. Grabbing a pair of jeans, he pulled them on. He wished he could knit together the tattered shreds of his lost dignity and don it as easily.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

He came downstairs, still looking slightly abashed and out of sorts, to find her sitting on the couch, staring at the television. She saw him and sat up straight, "Oh, I turned this on while I was waiting, hope you don't mind." She switched it off.

"I don't mind." He said, pausing at the bottom of the stairs. Then he crossed the room to drop into an armchair. He didn't know what to say. His mind was numb and sleep deprived, running on fumes. The only sleep he'd gotten in the past two nights was from quick dozes when he nodded off now and then in the uncomfortable hospital chair. He'd eaten a few bites of the lasagna, stubbornly ignoring the salad, and now those bites sat like leaden lumps in the pit of his stomach. He felt ill, light-headed and fairly humiliated by the earlier scene in the bathroom. Buffy was the last person he would've chosen to see him at his lowest point. Finally he asked, "Why are you here?"

Buffy flushed, "I was just waiting to see if you were ok. If you needed anything else-" She broke off there. His blue eyes were intense and not entirely warm and she felt for the first time that this unnerving new William might actually be a stranger to her.

"No, I mean, why are you here at all?" He asked her softly, and then recalling what his aunt had said when they arrived about her earlier meeting with Buffy, he asked, "How did you even know where I live to talk to Jenny? Not like we're friends…"

Buffy didn't think she could be more uncomfortable, "Yes, we are, William. We- we're friends." She stammered. "You've been helping me and-"

William let his head fall to rest on the back of the chair and was silent; then speech suddenly returned to him. "Yes. I've been helping you and you gave me lovely gifts in return and that was nice, but..." He rubbed his eyes wearily, "We aren't friends. Not really."

Buffy squirmed, "I'm your friend." She looked down. "You know I don't just go around helping all the naked, sleeping in the shower people I come across…" She said, joking weakly, and making a face at her own garbled sentence. The feeble jest backfired as he flinched visibly.

He raised his head and looked at her squarely, "Yes, thanks for that. I appreciate it, I do. But friends are friends in public too, you know. They talk to each other in the halls, sit together at lunch and do things outside of school. I don't need secret friends."

Buffy stood up. "Hey, I was your friend when Angel was being mean to you! That was public. That was a public hallway and that was bad and-" she shook her cast at him. "How was I supposed to know you could kick his ass!"

"Yes, how would you know anything about me?" William retorted sharply.

Buffy was taken aback. "I asked you questions sometimes, mister…mister quiet guy and sometimes you didn't want to talk very much and you-" she suddenly remembered why she was at his house and said more calmly, "You know what? You don't need this right now. I'm sorry I disturbed you by sticking around. If you'll be ok, I'll just go now."

He closed his eyes in frustration and pinched the bridge of his nose as though he had a headache. "You don't have a car, pet, remember?"

"I can go. I can…" Buffy paused to think and came up with nothing, "I can walk somewhere and…"

"You're not walking anywhere. I'll drive you home. You came over to help me and I thank you for that. Be poor thanks to send you out walking around town in the dark by yourself." He grabbed his keys from where she'd left them on the coffee table and motioned for her to go to the door.

Her face was still distressed and stubborn, "I can call-"

He grasped her small shoulder and pushed her gently to the door. "I'll drive. Please get in. I'm a little more awake after the shower, but I do need to get some real sleep soon."


End Note: Please don't be too mad at William. I know some people will be, because Buffy was only trying to help. I'll tell you, I've slept for multiple days in those hospital chairs and MAN you start to get wacky from sleep deprivation fairly quickly.

Please review if you have a moment. I enjoy reading them :)

William scrabbled around in the change bin in his car, plucking out quarters when he found them. 'That should be enough," he thought hopefully. He didn't want to use the emergency card any more than he already had. Jenny had given him some money for lunch at school and he was supposed to have been going there, but he wanted to stop in and see his mother.

Money would be tight now, he thought. Jenny was doing kind of ok. He'd overheard his mother and her discussing finances awhile ago, so he knew the house was paid off and she had enough money in her accounts to keep the household running, but he also knew some of the larger accounts were in his uncle's name only and until he was found or declared dead, which could take a long time, they were inaccessible to her. He briefly worried about his mother's hospital bills and thought that maybe he would have to get a job and try to contribute, but as he didn't have any way of helping that at the moment, he shoved it to the back of his mind.

The bell went off as he pushed the door to the florist's shop open and the woman behind the counter smiled, welcoming him. "How may I help you?" She asked.

"Erm," William started hesitantly, "I need to buy some flowers for my mother. She's in hospital. I think she likes," he paused, "uh, some big, fluffy flowers, about this size," he formed his hands into a loose circle, "pink or white…"

The florist smiled again and said patiently, "Could you be a little more specific? Or perhaps point them out, if you see them here?" She waved at the refrigerated cases.

William glanced around, but didn't see what he was looking for. "Uh, they grow on a bush, I know. Bigger than roses… I don't see them."

The woman said, "Ah, I think you may be referring to peonies, if you don't see them here. They're out of season at the moment."

"Oh," William looked down, unsure, "Well-"

"Let's see if we can find something else she'd like instead." The woman came around the counter.

"Oh, um," William pulled out his cash and change and said, "I have uh, ten dollars and fifty cents, so…"

The woman, whose nametag bore the name, 'Lisa', saw a worried look come over his face, noted the dark circles under his eyes and hollow cheeks and took pity on the young man. She said gently, "I think we can find something nice for that amount," and guided him over to the cases.

William left the shop, blissfully unaware of the fact that the bouquet and vase he carried were worth closer to fifty dollars than the ten he'd paid.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"Hi, Mum." William entered the room and spoke, seeing that she was awake.

"William," Anne said, surprised, "Shouldn't you be at school? What are those?"

"Oh, these are for you." William said and cleared a spot near the bed to place the vase where she could see and smell the flowers.

Anne breathed in their fragrance, "Darling, you shouldn't have, but they're lovely. Thank you. Come and give me a kiss." She held out her arms to him.

William went to her and then settled in his now customary spot in the chair beside her bed. "How are you feeling?" He asked her.

Anne avoided the question, not deterred from her earlier inquiry, "William. You should be at school." She raised her hand to his cheek. "I know you're upset, but you can't let this interfere with school and your future. Please. For me."

He stared at her, helpless. "Mum, I want to be here…"

"William, there's nothing you can do here. Of course, I love seeing you, but you can't sit at my bed all day, every day. You need to go out and do the things you have to do. Even-" She caressed his cheek, "have a little fun when you can. I'm worried about you."

"But Mum," he said and she cut him off.

"No buts. I don't want to see you here except when you don't have class. I don't want you to spend every evening here either. You may come once a day, for an hour or so and that's it. I won't have you wrecking your future or your health. If you want to be helpful, help your Aunt Jenny." Her tone grew less stern and she said, "Now give me another kiss and run to school. I want to hear all about what you're learning the next time I see you."

He did as she bid him and kissed her wan cheek lightly. "Yes, Mum. But, if you need me-"

"You'll be called if anything changes or you need to be here." Anne promised. "Now go." She gave him a nudge towards the door and though he looked back once uncertainly at her, he left.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy was waiting in the library again. She told herself that she was perfectly entitled to study in the library and she wasn't particularly waiting for William to show up, but her frequent glances at the doors told a different story. Finally, she realized he wasn't coming and managed to devote herself to her history assignment. She didn't see him when he showed up and peered through the windows of the doors.

William stood with his hand on the door, undecided. Then he turned away regretfully, deciding he couldn't face her yet. What she'd been witness to the day before had been very private and shameful. At least he felt it was. He just couldn't see her again so soon and he still didn't know what to say to her.

He was preoccupied too, with his mother's words. Help Jenny, she'd said. The only thing he could think to do to help his aunt was to get a job after school. He didn't feel right taking her money for his needs. If his mother wouldn't allow him to visit her, he'd find another way to use his time to contribute. He fingered his cell phone thoughtfully.

Dru had programmed her phone number in it at some time when he hadn't been paying attention. The entry read, 'Dru XXX', which he thought she'd meant to be read as kisses, but he wasn't entirely sure. He walked outside for his free period and flipped the phone open.

"Hi Dru, it's William," he said when she answered.

"Spike!" She greeted him happily.

He sighed. "William, pet. Anyway-"

"How is your mother?" Drusilla asked.

"Still not well, still in hospital," he replied, "but I was calling for another reason. I wondered if-" he paused, "well, look, I know we don't know each other well at all, but I'm rather desperate and I wondered if your father might need some help at the gym after school…"

"Oh, my Spike needs a job," he could almost see her nodding sagely, "I could talk to Daddy. I don't know if he's looking, but I could ask."

He let the name go this time. "Dru, if you could, that would be great. I really need a job and well, that's something I know quite a bit about."

"I'll work on it, dearest. I'll call you back to let you know after I've talked to him." Dru said cheerily.

"Thank you," he said, relieved that that had gone so well.

"However, I did think you were already employed," she continued. What on earth was she talking about, he wondered.

"Uh, pet-"

"You know, as my slave for life. You did promise me," she said, perfectly seriously.

William rolled his eyes. "Um…don't you think that we could take into consideration what you did, completely without my permission, to my hair and call that even?"

Dru laughed. "I'll have to do it again next week if you want to keep it that way. It looks so much better now, I think. Unless you want to try the blue," she sounded intrigued at this prospect and he thought he heard a faint, stifled giggle at his choked sound of protest. He made a mental note not to be incapacitated near her again anytime soon. "Well, even though I think it's unfair to retract your promise of servitude, I'll let it go this time. I'll call you later." She hung up.

'Odd bird,' he thought again, but he was grateful at the possibility of employment. He worked it out quickly in his mind. If he worked at the gym after school, he could use his free period to visit his mother. Buffy was doing better and her paper was pretty much written, so she'd be fine without him. He recalled the tension and awkwardness of the ride to her house the evening before. 'Yeah, she'll be fine.' Things were falling into place and he felt marginally better at least having some plan of action. He hated feeling as helpless and out of control as he had been the past few days.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy saw Willow in the hall and walked over to her. "Hey, Willow." The other girl turned. "Thanks again for helping me yesterday."

Willow smiled, "Oh…yesterday, you're welcome. No problem. I mean, not much of a problem. It would've been a big problem if we were caught, but you know we weren't, so yay and yeah, no problem!" She finished brightly, then her face clouded, "How is William? And his mom? How's his mom?"

Buffy grimaced. "Uh, I didn't get specifics, but it sounds kind of bad." She clarified, "his mom that is. William is…" She looked at the ground, "Um, I guess he's ok. As ok as he can be. Better."

Willow nodded sympathetically. "He wasn't at lunch again today, but I saw him in the hall a little while ago. Guess school stops for nothing, huh."

"Oh he's back?" Buffy asked softly.

"Buffy," Willow started, "sorry if this is rude, but how do you know William? Why do you care whether he's here or not? I mean," she looked puzzled, "it's not like you hang out with him or anything."

Buffy studied her toes intently. "He's my friend," she said so quietly Willow almost didn't catch it. "He's been helping me get my grades up and he's very nice and I hate that everything is so bad for him right now. That's all." She shrugged, still fixated on her shoes.

"Oh." Willow said. "He is really nice."

"Buffy!" Michelle darted through the crowd of students and grabbed her friend. "I know you're mad at Cordy and you can't cheer because of your wrist, but Karen and I were thinking of trying something new and I can't remember how the move goes, if it's a this," She struck a pose, "or a this," she did another, "at the end and I can't quite line up the-" she dragged her friend away and Buffy only had time to send Willow an apologetic look as she was pulled down the hall.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William lay in bed, staring at his blank, white ceiling. He was a little more hopeful now that he'd asked Dru about the job. He was actually glad he'd met her now. Underneath the eccentricities, it seemed she had a good heart. He reached out and turned the light off.

He could start tomorrow off purposefully. He had plans - go to school, see his mother, possibly work and earn some money. Maybe tomorrow morning he wouldn't have such difficulty getting out of bed. Maybe tomorrow he could fill up the strange hollowness inside him with action, not stopping to think.

'Stop all the clocks.' Auden's poem* ran through his head. 'That's what should really happen.' Somewhere deep inside of him he wondered at what moment he'd accepted the fact that his mother wasn't going to get well. Tomorrow he could go back to fighting it. Tonight, here in his dark room, alone, he knew.

His father's death had hurt horribly, but William had always been closest to his mother.

He hoped that by staying busy himself, perhaps tomorrow it wouldn't feel so strange that everything was carrying on, much as usual, just as though his life hadn't fallen apart…again. Maybe tomorrow he wouldn't feel like hiding under the covers and pleading for a timeout from life. It wasn't fair that everything around him should continue normally, the pace not slackening a beat for the lack of his mother. 'It's like she doesn't matter,' he thought sadly, 'no one notices her missing but Jenny and me. Nothing stops.' He closed his eyes.

But a brighter thought stealthily wove its way into the darkness in his head as, exhausted, he drifted off to sleep at last.

Buffy had noticed he was missing.



*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

*The poem William was remembering:

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone
by W. H. Auden

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.
The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

Buffy wasn't attending to the conversation around her. She sat biting her pen as she finished up her math homework. She vaguely gathered that their father was interrogating Dawn about something. She should really have been paying more attention to her sister, because then she would have recognized the frantic look of desperation followed by the evil gleam of inspiration in her sister's eyes in time to flee.

"Buffy had a boy in her room when no one was home!" Dawn yelled, throwing Buffy to the wolves and rushing upstairs as her father turned on her sister. Buffy had only a second to react and she fumed silently at her retreating sister.

"Buffy Anne Summers!" He growled at her. "Who did you have upstairs? That Angel? You know you're not to have ANYONE upstairs ESPECIALLY when we're not at home."

"Daddy, I-" Buffy tried to placate him, "No, Angel and I broke up. I'm working on a project for English and I had my partner over, that's all. Dawn was down here being loud and she wouldn't go away and I had nowhere else to go-"

"You will NOT have boys in your room, young lady. For any reason. Do you understand?" Hank Summers repeated angrily.

"Yes, Daddy," she said softly, "it won't happen again."

He looked at his watch and swore. "Now get upstairs and get dressed. We're going to the club for dinner tonight with the Abrams. Tell your sister." He turned to leave the room.

"Yes, Daddy." Buffy said and obediently headed upstairs.

She banged on her sister's door and threw it open without waiting for a reply.

"Hey!" Dawn shouted at her. "Get out!"

"Thanks a lot, Dawn!" Buffy yelled back. "Don't think I'll forget that." She stared furiously at Dawn. "Get dressed we have to go to the club."

"I don't want to go to the club again," Dawn whined. "I want pizza."

"Not like we have a choice. Get dressed." Buffy left, slamming the door behind her.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy wondered if it was possible to expire from boredom. The frustration had been rising all throughout dinner as she politely made small talk when spoken to and responded to Parker when necessary.

Parker was seated to her left and his older sister Claire was beside him. Their father was some big work contact of her father's and the families often met on social occasions. Parker was in her crowd at school, too, but he made her uncomfortable for a reason she couldn't define. She supposed he was good looking and charming enough, but there was something in his eyes, his manner, that reeked of insincerity to her.

He and Claire were now discussing the upcoming cotillion and how dreary it would be. "Buffy have you gotten your dress yet?" Claire asked her, taking a delicate bite of her fish.

"No." Buffy said, "I haven't found one."

Claire sighed, "It's so boring isn't it? All those whites and pastels. I've half a mind to show up in red and shock everyone." She smiled mischievously and flicked her brother on the shoulder. "No such worries for you boys, put on your tux and you're done."

Parker rolled his eyes. "At least you get to be comfortable. I'll be choked all night." His fingers found the knot of his tie and played with it.

She nudged him again, giggling, "Like stockings and heels are the height of comfort, not to mention everything that goes into preparation. Ah, what we must go through to look presentable." She smiled at Buffy. "At least the guest list is invitation only, not like the school dances." She sniffed. "We would have to live in a town with no suitable private school." She parroted the haughty tones of her mother, "That place is a nightmare." She set down her fork and smoothed one long brown lock down her shoulder absently. "You know, the food here has really gone downhill since the last chef left. The fish was so bland tonight."

Parker nodded in agreement.

Buffy fought to keep the distaste from her face. 'A nightmare.' Claire hadn't the faintest clue what a real nightmare was. Here they were, dining at the club, as they always did, eating food of a quality many people would never taste and turning their noses up at it, complaining all the while at the minor inconveniences they were forced to endure. Meanwhile, people, good people like William and his mother, had horrible things happening to them and real worries.

She felt a rush of disgust for them suddenly and for herself. They spent their lives heedless of anything beyond their world of privilege, never quite reaching or touching the real world around them, locked in their own little protected sanctuary…only coping with things like bland fish. 'I wish Claire had choked on it,' she thought viciously. The other girl's superficiality hit her like a club and she wondered if she'd ever been so blind and shallow.

Parker was talking. 'Damn it, Parker's talking to me, what did he say-' Buffy thought.

"So would you like to?" Parker asked.

'Would I like to what? Would I what?’ Buffy cast her eyes around the table helplessly. Dawn smirked at her, enjoying her sister's predicament, having giggled inside at the sight of her sister tuning out Parker's monotonous "me me me" drone.

"She'd love to!" Her father's voice boomed out.

"Oh, great." Parker beamed.

Catching the veiled warning in her father's eyes, she quickly said, "Oh of course!" She smiled weakly and uneasily wondered what she'd agreed to.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Dawn stared at her stupid sister. "Dinner and the Bronze Friday night." She sniffed. "God, you have to stop smoking crack, you're losing it."

Buffy sighed. She'd feared as much. "Just wait 'til Dad does this to you. You'll see how much it sucks." She started back to her own room.

Dawn said, "Buffy, wait-" Her sister turned. "Uh, about earlier." She made a face as though what she wanted to say pained her, "I'm uh…I'm sorry."

Buffy sighed again. "It's ok, Dawn. I know how he is. Please remember how understanding I'm being when you feel like throwing me under the bus next time."

"Oh, you mean remember how you didn't get all mad and retaliate?" Dawn said teasing.

Buffy narrowed her eyes at her sister. "Didn't retaliate YET. Goodnight, Dawn."

"Night, Buffy." Dawn said and snuggled back under her covers.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Joyce removed her earrings and set them carefully in their place in her jewelry box. "Hank," she said to her husband who was loosening his tie. "I don't think you should interfere in the girls' lives like that." She sat at her vanity and moistened a cotton ball, preparing to remove her makeup.

Tie in hand, Hank turned to her, "What do you mean?"

"Accepting a date with Parker for Buffy. You shouldn't force her to date someone just because you think he'd be appropriate for her." Joyce said seriously.

Hank snorted, "Appropriate? Like any young man is appropriate. They're all the same underneath, Joyce. I was one, I know." He tossed the tie on a chair. "At least this way she can be doing something to contribute to the family's wellbeing. It's good to network with the Abrams and more social contact can't hurt."

"Contribute?" Joyce looked at him, frowning. "Buffy contributes just by being a member of this family. What she's supposed to do is grow up happy and healthy and do the best she can in school. She's not a business asset, Hank!" Her voice rose.

Hank looked at her, his surprise and displeasure evident on his face. "What, you have a problem with Parker? What's wrong with the boy? He's from a good family, handsome enough, polite, well-spoken - what more do you want for your daughter?"

Joyce said stubbornly, "Someone Buffy wants to date. That's what I want."

"Like that lump Angel? What kind of name is that, anyway?" Hank mocked. "The boy had a Neanderthal brow and looked like he could barely string two words together. You really want those traits swimming around in our future grandchild's gene pool?

Joyce's disbelief was clear, "First, Angel could talk just fine. I've spoken with him many times and you've only met him once in passing. Second, Buffy is seventeen. There isn't even a thought about future grandchildren in my head, yet. She'll go to college, maybe have a career and hopefully find someone she loves to share her life with. There's no rush for her to grow up, Hank." She turned back to the mirror and dabbed the cotton at her eyeliner. "You'll be back on another business trip and lose interest again soon anyway." She muttered under her breath to herself as he headed to the bathroom and slammed the door.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Dru was incongruously perched on the stool behind the desk at the gym like an exotic bird that had somehow taken a wrong turn and landed in an unsuitably mundane setting. Clad in electric blue today, she was a bolt of vivid color against the smudged tan and white of the gym walls. She twirled a strand of her long hair idly as she waited for her father.

"Daddy!" She clapped at her father.

Mr. Crawford stared irritably at his daughter. "Dru, what are you wearing now?"

Dru jumped up from the stool to swirl around for him, modeling her attire. The gauzy, sleeveless dress hung loosely from her slender form and frothed in unexpected volume around her calves. The neckline dipped low, nearly to her belly button, and only two slender strings of silk near her breasts kept the top half from parting to reveal all. Paired with her boots, it was certainly an interesting choice in daywear. "You don't like it? It's new." She pouted.

"New? Where did you get money for something new?" He grunted at her, "Rent's due in two days and I expect you layabouts to have it in full or you're out on your asses."

She ignored his bad temper and ran up to him. "Daddy, we've had some paying gigs lately and more are lined up." She turned her eyes to his face almost wistfully, "We're quite good, really. Everyone says so."

He brushed past her to get to the desk and opened a drawer, paying little attention to her as he said. "What did you want, Dru?"

She trailed back to the desk and sidled closer to him, "I have a favor to do you," she said.

He snorted. "You're going to do me a favor. What's that, then?"

"I have the perfect employee for you," she responded earnestly.

He shook his head. "No. No friend of yours could possibly be anyone I'd want in my employ. Most likely steal or nap on the mats all day in a drunken stupor. No."

Drusilla persisted, "Oh, but you'll like this one. Really, you will. He already comes here. William. William Pratt. He," she flapped her hand in the air, "knows things already."

He looked at her and she wrapped herself around his arm, "Pleeease, Daddy." She wheedled. "He'd be ever so grateful."

He shook her loose. "I know the boy." He mulled it over in his head. "He's young, he'll work cheap. Knows the equipment. S'pose he wants evenings after school, yeah?" She nodded. "Tell him to come in and talk to me tonight. But I'll have no drugs or alcohol in this gym, be sure he knows that. He shows up pissed once and he's out." He frowned at her again and said, "Get out now, Dru. You know you can't hang out here."

She looked at him sadly. "Daddy, Devon dropped me. I was hoping…"

"Get out and catch the bus, Dru. I've no time for this today." Grabbing the ledger he was after, he stalked out of the room.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Rupert Giles had watched Buffy the previous day and caught her monitoring of the doorway. He'd noticed that young William hadn't appeared to assist her the last couple days and wondered at the cause. Giles had known Buffy since she was a baby and been entranced by her just as long. He'd met Joyce in school and though they'd dated briefly, the end result of their relationship had been a nearly twenty year friendship.

He'd visited the Summers home often during Buffy and Dawn's childhood and was fond of both of them, but Buffy was the one he thought of as the daughter he'd never had. Hank frequently left on long business trips during her infancy and Giles had regularly stepped in to assist a somewhat frazzled Joyce with her new baby. She'd been trying to get the gallery off the ground during that period and at the time money hadn't been available for hired help either at work or home.

He'd racked up long nights spent walking a fussy, teething Buffy so that Joyce could get some much needed sleep. He'd read many bedtime stories and spent hours watching her sleeping, tiny fingers curled around his thumb. She'd had him wrapped around those fingers ever since, despite the occasional fatherly frustration he felt with her.

He'd seen the disappointment in her face as she gathered her books to leave for her next class and wished he knew what was going on between William and her. Today he’d resolved to find out.

"Buffy," he said, sitting beside her, "Where's William? Is he not aiding you in your studies anymore?"

Buffy stared at the polished wood of the table. "No. I don't think he is."

"Did you have a disagreement?" Giles prodded gently.

"No…kind of…maybe?" Buffy made a face, "I don't know."

Giles sighed at her, faint exasperation traced out in the lines of his face. "You may need to be a trifle more specific than that, dear."

"Giles, it's such a mess. Everything is such a mess. This," she raised her wrist ruefully, "William, Angel, Cordy, Dad…"

"You know you can tell me anything, Buffy. Would it help to talk about it?"

"He doesn't think I'm his friend." She blurted out.

"Are you?" Giles asked solemnly.

"Yes, I think so. I mean, when you care about what happens to somebody they're your friend, right?" Buffy said earnestly.

"Sometimes," Giles said carefully, "it's generally a reciprocal thing."

"He's…his father died and now his mother's sick and…" Buffy said, "He was really sad and I tried to help him and now I think he's mad that I was there and…what can I do, Giles? What helps with something like that? How do you know what to do? He doesn't seem to want to be around me anymore and I don't know-"

Giles considered the mangled bits and pieces he'd just heard and said calmly, "Sometimes, Buffy, there's nothing tangible you can do. People who have had a great shock like that may act unpredictably and often take out their anger on the circumstances on the people around them. All you can do is let him know you're there and continue to be there for him as best you can."

Buffy snorted in frustration. "Not sure how I can be there, when he seems to want to be anywhere I'm not."

He removed his glasses and rubbed at them thoughtfully. "Give him a little time to sort things out, Buffy. Have some patience and he'll appreciate having someone to talk to when he comes around."

"I guess so." Buffy said softly. "I'm not very good at this, Giles. Tell me that when you grow up, it gets easier to deal with stuff like this."

"It never gets truly easy to handle these sorts of situations, Buffy, I'm sorry. All you can do is your best."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy saw his white head above the crowd in the hall and dashed over to him. "William," she said. "How are you?"

William turned to her. "Hello, Buffy," and said nothing else.

"I um, I was waiting for you, but you didn't come. Are you-" she hesitated, "are you still going to be helping me? I mean…I understand if you can't but-" She looked at him nervously, "are you mad at me?"

He stared at her, "Always thinking it's something to do with you, hmm?" He said, somewhat teasingly and then continued, voice low, "I visit my mother sixth period now. Hospital's nearby."

Buffy flushed, "I-no, you just didn't mention anything and I-" she stammered, "Uh, maybe you'd meet me after school? I don't have cheerleading anymore, so…"

"Can't." He said bluntly, putting his book in his locker and withdrawing the one he needed for his next class. "Have a job at a gym downtown after school as of today. Sorry, I haven't much free time now." He turned back to her and saw the look of disappointment on her face. 'Chit probably thinks she'll fail now,' he thought, then took pity on her, "Look, you're doing fine. You've finished your paper, have some decent grades in history and English. You'll be alright now, just have to keep up the studying. Get your sister to read off the questions to you or something and Giles to proofread your papers." He started to leave her where she stood, then reiterated, "You'll be fine, luv." He walked away and she still hadn't said another word.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Reviews make me all happy 'n stuff. Well, except if you hate it and even then it's interesting :)

Buffy sat amongst her friends and former friends at their usual lunch table. Angel had opted for the ‘ignore anything happened at all’ choice with regard to what had occurred at the Bronze, as had Riley. The bruises had faded and neither boy was eager to publicize being beaten by William any more had been noised about by the people at the club that night. Buffy was relieved at this, she’d worried that Angel would take out his wounded pride on William, either legally or otherwise.

To Buffy, Angel said nothing. Most of the time, he acted as though she didn't exist and she found that she was surprisingly ok with that. Strangely, after the initial shock had worn off, Angel's quick rebound with Cordelia seemed to have burned away some of the residual feelings she'd had for him. Any lingering guilt or indecision she felt over hurting or breaking up with him was gone. Painful, but effective way to start getting over a breakup, she thought grimly. It was helpful that every time she looked at the cast on her wrist, she was reminded of the reason for their split.

However, separating their friends hadn't proved to be possible for very long. They were too often torn between Buffy and Angel, so both of them had resigned themselves to being in the same places at the same times. Lunch was one of these instances and was solved by sitting at opposite ends of the long table. Buffy and her strongest supporters were at one end and Angel and Cordelia at the other. She still caught him looking at her occasionally, but he was either getting better at hiding it or looking less often.

Buffy listened with one ear as Heather and Michelle, sitting on either side of her, filled her in on some latest tasty bit of gossip. She played with her mushy unidentifiable entrée unenthusiastically, finally setting the fork down and opening a nonfat yogurt. She took a spoonful and nodded her head in response to something Heather had said. She didn't know why she was so bored hanging out with her friends lately; it just seemed they were always talking about the same things happening to the same people.

Even cheerleading stories failed to rouse her interest. 'I'm just not too into it because I'm upset I can't actually do it right now,' she told herself. 'Once I can get back to it, I'll be just as excited as I used to be.' However, unless the football team started winning some games, any future excitement was going to be dimmed somewhat. Buffy was ashamed of herself, but she did feel some smidgeon of satisfaction that though Angel had been cleared to play, he was completely off his game and had contributed greatly to the loss on Saturday.

Buffy let the cheerful chatter of her friends wash over her and began scanning the cafeteria restlessly. There, in the far corner. She caught sight of Willow's bright red hair and across from her, a glimpse of platinum blond. She wondered what had made him change his hair so suddenly anyway. She hadn't really had a chance to ask him. She hadn't really had a chance to talk to him much at all.

Buffy had been shocked and even a little hurt at his brusque attitude yesterday. She'd thought he enjoyed their study sessions as much as she did and to have him end them so abruptly was…rude. 'Yeah, rude!' Her inner voice chimed in. 'Rude's the word for it. He said he'd help me and then he just deserts me, with good reason, yes, but without saying a word and that's just…' she wanted to fill in the word 'rude' again, but somehow, 'disappointing' popped into her head.

Buffy had no idea what she'd done wrong the evening at his house. 'What was I supposed to do? Let him drown in the shower?' She wondered at the likelihood of that, but then concluded that at the very least, having cold water pouring down on you wasn't very healthy. She couldn't think what she might've done differently though. 'Maybe he isn't mad,' she thought doubtfully, 'maybe he's just really busy and it's nothing to do with me at all, just like he said.'

She didn't know why she was so focused on the loss of the sixth period sessions. Giles had taken pity on her and offered to help her now, she reminded herself, 'my grades will stay up and yay, happy Buffy!' That was the only thing that mattered right? If he didn't want to be friends, well, that was that and she had enough friends anyway. His loss.

She looked over at William again, shifting slightly in her chair until she had his face in view; he was smiling slightly at something Willow was saying and then turning to Tara, grinning and saying something that made the quiet girl blush. She saw the dark haired boy laugh and punch him lightly on the arm. 'Well, good that he found some friends that are acceptable to him,' she sniffed inwardly. She stared at the milky soup of her yogurt and swirled the spoon around and around in circles. 'Why am I not acceptable as a friend?' She asked herself, mentally pouting. 'Oh, well, maybe you are,' piped up her inner voice, 'go on over there and talk to him then, if you're his friend. Go take a seat; I'm sure they won't mind.' Jabbing the spoon into the yogurt, she thought to herself sadly, 'Yeah, right, just go on over and-,' just as Parker slid into the seat he'd asked Heather to vacate for him.

She plastered the best fake smile on her face that she could manage and looked up at him. "Hey Parker."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"What are you doing?" Dawn asked her sister, who was staring at her face in the bathroom mirror, poking and prodding it from different angles. She'd just gotten home from school and as far as she could tell, her sister had been in here for quite some time.

Buffy continued making faces at herself. "Dawn, do I look chubbier to you?"

Dawn smirked behind Buffy's back, this would be entertaining. She peered at Buffy intently, "Yeah, you know I think I do see a double chin developing just…there." She pointed her finger and prodded under Buffy's chin.

"What! No!" Buffy brought her chin down and tried to see what her sister did.

Dawn gave her sister her minute of panic and then laughed. "Buffy, you look the same as you always do."

Buffy frowned. "I gained two pounds."

"Well, yeah, you're not cheerleading, just moping around sitting on the couch watching TV after school."

"Well, my friends are all busy." Buffy said defensively.

"You could go work out at the club, if you wanted to stay in shape. I'm sure there's a lot you can do even not using your left arm." Dawn suggested helpfully.

Dawn could see some light bulb turning on in Buffy's head, she was so transparent, but had no idea what had popped into her sister's brain.

"Yeah, I could go work out. I think I'll go do that!" Buffy said, grinning. "Thanks Dawn!"

Clueless, Dawn shrugged at the mystery that was her sister and left the room.


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

There were two gyms downtown. One was in the boutique shopping area and the other in the more industrial section of town by the docks and the Bronze. Buffy stopped in the Mindful Body Gym and Spa first, but after only a few steps in the door she doubted that this would be where William was employed. The employees running around in brightly colored stretchwear were all tan and limber from presumably hours of aerobics, and the atmosphere was violently cheerful and upbeat. 'Ugh.' Buffy thought. 'Ok, not here. At least I don’t think so. Well, I can come back if it's not the other place.' She edged slowly towards the door, moving faster as a perky blonde with a jewel toned clipboard headed in her direction. "Wrong address!" Buffy said quickly, smiling apologetically as she escaped.

Buffy told herself she was doing this because of her earlier encounter with the scale. It was a bit harder to explain away the fact that she was considering joining a gym, since she did have access to a state of the art, shiny, huge one at the club that her father was already paying for. She floundered at that one a bit and shoved the thought aside impatiently. She just had to hope this was one of the months her father was busy and just wrote the checks out for the credit card bills without paying attention to the details of the charges. This was the norm, but the months that he did look, the audits were very thorough and he required detailed explanations for any expenditure he dubbed abnormal. She crossed her fingers and hoped again that he was in his busy mode.

She checked the paper she had in her hand. This was the spot. The front stucco was chipping off and the lettering 'Crawford's Gym' was faded and worn. She lingered uncertainly on the sidewalk, clutching her gym bag. The area was neither a good nor a bad one, hovering somewhere in between. During the daytime, the docks were busy and the Bronze, pretty much Sunnydale's only night club, was shuttered and dark. Looking around, there seemed to be quite a few boarded up buildings. The diner down the street was doing a booming business, however. Buffy had been to that diner many a time after Bronzing. 'It's fine.' She reassured herself and pushed the door open.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Jenny hadn't been pleased when William informed her about his new job. "William," she said, "I just worry you're taking on too much. You know I can give you money. You don't have to do this, on top of school and your mother…"

William gazed steadily at her, "I know, Jenny, but I don't like taking your money. You've already been kind enough with the car and I do appreciate that. Least I can do is earn my way enough to put gas in the thing. It won't interfere with anything."

Jenny touched his arm lightly, "I just worry…"

His voice low, he mumbled, "I don't know what to do with myself. I need to do something. Need to help. Please let me."

She brushed her hand along his hair affectionately like he was a little boy and not a young man taller than she was. "Ok then. Ok. But if it gets too much-"

"Gets too much, I'll quit." William promised and breathed a sigh of relief.


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Rather than the soothing bell chime of the door at the other gym, this one emitted a harsh screech of unoiled or misaligned hinges as its alert and slammed shut after her with a heavy clunk. Buffy flinched a little at the loud sound and what she could see of the gym on the inside. This gym was as busy as the other, but there were no vivid colors or cheery employees flitting around. It was dull and dingy, the walls a smudged tan and white, the lighting flickering fluorescents. Beyond the entryway, she could see people working out and didn't spy a single woman. This place's clientele seemed to be a rougher sort and exclusively male. The muscles she saw displayed here weren't elongated and elegant, toned by step class or yoga, tai chi or tennis. These weren't muscles for leisure; they were clearly for and possibly from, manual labor. The uniform seemed to be different too, no stretchy lycra here, just sweats and tank tops and t-shirts. She paused, unsure again.

"Buffy?" William said in disbelief. "What are you doing here?"

Caught, Buffy decided her decision had been made for her and summoned up her usual perky cheer. "Oh, I'm here to take a tour, maybe join and work out." She raised her pink duffel in the air slightly, waggling it at him and smiling. "Since my wrist, I uh, haven't gotten much exercise and well, I'm feeling out of shape."

William raised an eyebrow at her. "One, pet, you're not out of shape at all. It's only been a week. Two, why here? Don't you belong to that fancy club the rest all do?"

Buffy shifted uneasily, "Uh…Angel goes to the club. It's kind of awkward, you know?" She bit her lip and prayed he wouldn't ask why it would be awkward if she went while Angel was at practice. 'It would be awkward if he were there!' She told herself firmly, 'and he could be! You never know, he could be! Or uh, his mom could be yeah, or his sister, you never know!' She continued, "Anyway, the out of shape thing, I uh…I'm worried about gaining weight and not being ready to cheer when my wrist gets better."

She eyed him cautiously through her lashes, trying to determine if he was accepting her reasoning. He really looked different in his workout clothes, clad all in black, t-shirt hugging his chest. He looked good. The light hair really brought out his eyes… She worried her lip a little more while she waited for his response. He didn't have time to say anything else however, because another man came up to them.

"Will, you helping this lady?" George Crawford stepped in.

"Yes, sir." William said, fully aware that this was only his second day, "Buffy was looking into the gym, but I don't think she thinks it'll suit her purposes after all." He gave her a meaningful look.

Buffy hesitated and then, discarding William's subtle suggestion, said, "I don't know, it might, I'm not sure yet."

George Crawford saw money heading out the door. He put his arm around her slender shoulders, shot a warning to his new employee over her head, and guided her further inside. "Well, let's just give you a tour and see whether we'll do, yeah?"

William shook his head. Wasn't the right place for Buffy to be hanging out. He sighed. While he'd had a brief flash of happiness at the sight of her when she'd first walked in and he'd missed her the past couple days, he silently admitted to himself, he still didn't think she belonged here. 'What the hell is she really doing here, anyway?' He wondered suspiciously. 'Maybe she thinks she can persuade me to help her with her assignments while she's here. Bounce stuff off of me. Persistent chit, she is.' He knew Buffy had some insecurity about her schoolwork and thought perhaps she wasn't ready to let go of her academic security blanket. ‘Yeah, maybe that’s it.’ He leaned back on the desk and watched as Mr. Crawford shepherded her around the gym.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Please review if you have the time! Thanks :)

William had been instructed to show Buffy how to use the machines and help determine the proper weights for her, so they'd been making the circuit of the ones she was capable of using for the past half hour, William diligently writing down the weights and repetitions on her chart. For the most part, they'd been silent, only speaking in relation to what they were doing. They moved to the free weights for a few arm exercises now, since she could only use her right arm.

Buffy was hesitant to say anything because William seemed so distant and unlike the boy she'd spent so many hours with in the library. He'd always been somewhat quiet and slow to warm up to conversation, but now she could almost feel the wall he'd erected between them as he remained very businesslike, counting off repetitions. Before, each day, he would gradually relax until he was actually joking and she thought, enjoying the back and forth banter that always seemed to develop between the two of them. Now, he spoke little and his face was so devoid of emotion she couldn't tell anything from it.

'But he was laughing with his friends earlier…' she thought, 'Maybe it's just me he's not comfortable around.' A thought struck her and she groaned mentally, 'Oh God, maybe he thinks I'm stalking him, showing up at the hospital and then here. Great, now I'm crazy little stalker girl, that's just fantastic.'

He demonstrated the exercise he wanted her to do next and handed her the small barbell.

She took it, fingers brushing his, and looked up at him from the bench on which she sat. "William," Buffy said softly, "How is your mother?"

He stilled. "The same," he said tersely. "Thanks for asking." He gestured for her to start the exercise. "No, that's not quite it, like this-" he held her wrist and turned it slightly so that she would have the proper angle.

Buffy sighed. "I'm sorry, I hope she's out of the hospital soon."

"Yeah." William said, "Look, after this, you can just head over to the treadmill. You've pretty much got the weights down. May want to do a half hour walking. Let me know if you need any help starting a program." He turned to go back to the desk then thought of something else and said frowning, "What did Mr. Crawford say about the locker room? Far's I know, there's only the men's…"

Buffy tried to keep her face equally as uninformative at his obvious desire to get away from her as quickly as possible. "Ummm, he said I could use the private one down there," she pointed. "I told him I didn't have anything valuable and he said I could stash my stuff in there, shower and change…so, guess I'm all set." She managed a smile, which William didn't see because he was looking somewhere in the vicinity of the floor. "Thanks for helping me."

"No problem. It's my job." William broke away at this point, relieved to be escaping the tension. He didn't want to talk about his mother. The job was supposed to help him forget that she was lying in a bed surrounded by strangers, feeling ill. He certainly didn't want to stay with Buffy, combating confusing feelings in addition to the ones he was already suppressing.

Every time she touched him he felt a little jolt go through him at the contact. 'No point thinking about that, mate. She's for the O'Connors and the Finns of the world. Wouldn't be lookin' at you.' He felt a twinge of anger at thinking she'd ever belonged to Angel, the way he'd treated her, but he quickly brushed it away. She hadn't broached the subject of her classes yet or what she really wanted here. He wouldn't let himself wonder.

He rolled his eyes; she was so out of place here it wasn't funny, in her tight pink tank top that had something silvery and glittery written across the front. It was in a difficult to read script, the silvery message light and intricate and he hadn't wanted to stare so he still didn't know what the bloody thing said. It was like those sodding bumper stickers you had to be a foot off the bloke's bumper to read. Dangerous. He'd spent most of the time trying not to look at her, but in doing so had noticed all the other gym occupants taking good long stares at that tiny shirt and her form fitting black leggings…he got irritated all over again. What was she doing here?

On his way to the desk, a man asked for a spot and he went over to him, grateful for the interruption from his thoughts.

'Well, at least I got a workout,' Buffy sighed to herself and headed for the treadmill.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

A short time later, William noticed a few men standing around near the far wall of the main room. They were laughing but something about their expressions struck him as wrong. They were dressed and looked ready to leave the gym. One of the men looked around and William glanced down a moment to remain unobserved. The man drew what looked like a pocketknife out of his jeans pocket, another shoving him, grinning, towards…William took only a second to realize where it was the man was being pushed toward - the dimly lit hall where the private bathroom was located. The man had his back to him, already inserting the tip of the knife into the door and rattling it when William came up behind him. William fought down the immediate flash of rage that shot through him and said, quite calmly, "What are you doing there, mate?"

The man shot up, goofy grin sliding off his face, replaced by sullen defensiveness, "Nothing, just having a bit of fun."

William's nostrils flared. "Yeah, well, go have your fun elsewhere. This isn't the place. Might get into some trouble here."

The man looked to the knife in his hand and back at William, flexing his impressive arm muscles pointedly and said loudly. "Yeah? How’d you figure that?"

William shrugged at him, continuing to keep anything threatening out of his voice, but it still rose noticeably as he said, "Gym's got rules. That-" he pointed at the door, "depending on what you were doing, might also be a crime of some sort. That's what I figure."

The man pondered this silently, and then clicked the knife closed. "Yeah, not worth the trouble," he mumbled. He didn't look back as he left the hall.

William stood there, straining to keep his cool, staring after the knife wielding would-be what? Peeping Tom at best. Rapist? He didn't think the man would be so bold, certainly not joking around with his friends about it, but he didn't want to think about it.

The door opened and Buffy peeked out at him with wide green eyes, her hair still tousled and wet, street clothes rumpled as though she'd pulled them on in a hurry. "I heard…" Her voice was shaky, "I heard the doorknob rattle and then…" She clutched the doorknob tightly, "I thought someone was going to come in and then you were talking to someone-"

William stepped over to her and awkwardly rubbed her arm soothingly, "It's ok, pet. I don't think they'll be doing that again." He sighed at her, "But you can see why I said this isn't really the place for you."

Buffy was suddenly near tears. She hadn't accomplished anything but making William's job more difficult and had somehow attracted unwanted attention of the worst sort. This had been such a bad idea…but…

Her eyes were glassy, but she wasn't crying, and she raised them to his with new certainty, "I want…I want you to teach me how to defend myself." She paused, "When Angel had you pinned in the hall and later-" her voice lowered, "when he had me pinned in the closet," she ignored the way this shattered his impassive mask and replaced it with sheer fury, "and then when you were all fighting at the Bronze…I felt so helpless. There was nothing I could do." She frowned, "Nothing. Nothing but stand there and take it or stand there and watch. I'm tired of not being able to do anything," she said angrily, "I'm tired of being small and being pushed around and," she said softer now, pleading with him, "being hurt. I want to be able to defend myself," she repeated, "to be able to do something." All of her life she'd felt either shielded or pushed around by the men around her, she wanted to grasp some control, take back some power, do something, anything to feel a little less vulnerable.

William took in her earnest plea for a moment, hand resting on her shoulder lightly. "Well, first thing you need to know is you don't attack, you run. You see an opportunity, you take it and you run…that's the safest thing to do, yeah? Doing something like stepping in between us at the Bronze wouldn't have been safe at all, no matter what you knew how to do. You run."

"Yeah, I already know how to run!" She said, irritated that he wasn't taking her seriously, "Didn't work too well with Angel and tell me where I was supposed to run just now? Huh?" She started to turn to grab her stuff and leave in a huff, but he held onto her shoulder gently, holding her back.

"Didn't mean I wouldn't help you," William said gruffly, "that's the first thing to know is all, you have a bad situation, first see if you can run. Then if you can't, there are other things to try so you can get free enough to run."

"Then you'll help me?" Buffy asked him. "You'll help me learn self defense?"

"Of course he will!" George Crawford said cheerfully, stepping in front of them and clapping William on the back, "Be glad to give you hour long classes, often as you like and if you'll just step this way, Miss Summers, we can discuss the rate." Buffy grabbed for her things in a hurry and shot a last look at William, still standing in the doorway, as Mr. Crawford firmly escorted her to his office.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy escaped the office, still dazed at Mr. Crawford's spiel. She'd signed up for a run of twelve classes with William at an exorbitant rate. 'I hope he'll see some of that money,' she thought, frowning doubtfully. Then she saw something that deepened her frown. William was standing at the desk and a dark haired girl was teasingly ruffling his hair and leaning in to whisper something to him. She stopped and studied the girl and as she did, Drusilla turned her head slightly, revealing her face and Buffy recognized the singer from the week before. The one William had left with. She felt an irrational urge to yank the girl's hand out of William's hair. Slender and graceful in a dark blue dress, Drusilla pressed into his side lightly and slid her hand down William's back. Buffy's lips firmed and she stalked over to the desk.

"New friend, William? We haven't met." Buffy said coolly.

William started and looked at her, "Oh, this is Drusilla," he said, "Mr. Crawford's daughter. She got me the job here."

Smile never wavering, Drusilla turned and favored Buffy with a haughty onceover and seemingly finding her lacking said, "Who is this, my Spike, a little friend from school?"

Buffy fumed silently as William said again irritably, "DRU…I am not a DOG."

"Rrrrowf, rrrruff," Drusilla barked playfully at him, hanging on his arm.

He rolled his eyes at her.

"Does she do other tricks too, William? Or just the one." Buffy's icy voice dripped with a disdain he'd never heard from her before and he looked at her, puzzled.

"She's-" he stopped, looking back and forth between the two girls and thinking Buffy had never resembled one of her stuck up friends more than this moment, her pretty face arrogant and cold and Dru, Dru was smiling like she was playing the best game ever.

Caught between Buffy's glare and Dru's glee, he opted for flight. "Erm, Buffy, how are you getting home?" He asked, "If you're taking the bus, let me walk you to the stop. I can take a five minute break." Dru pouted slightly, and cast her eyes to the ceiling, but released his arm.

"Oh yes, little girls shouldn't run around unsupervised." Drusilla said, smirking at Buffy.

Buffy wanted to say she could take care of herself just fine, thank you, but she remembered the earlier incident and bit down her instinctive response. "Sure, thanks," she said, flicking her ponytail over one shoulder, chin in the air, "Pleasure meeting you, umm, whatever your name was." With that, she strode to the door and William was left scrambling to catch up.

"Dru, what've I told you about hanging around here?" Mr. Crawford said, coming up behind her.

"Oh," Dru tapped her long, slender fingers idly on the desk, "not to," she said absently, "Daddy-"

"YES. NOT TO." A vein in his temple throbbed visibly. "SO-"

"Daddy, what's that girl doing here?"

"She's a paying customer Dru! Unlike you!" Mr. Crawford said loudly. "Why?"

"I don't like her." Drusilla pouted. "She shouldn't come here again."

"Tough. She's going to be paying a pretty penny for lessons with young Will and maybe she'll bring in a few more of her friends. That type lets money run through their fingers like water. She does that and it'll bring me a nice rise in the profits every month." A fond gleam entered his eye at the thought of all the possible money to come.

"But I don't want her here." Drusilla said again.

Mr. Crawford snapped out of his avaricious daydream abruptly and said in a dangerously low tone to his only daughter, "If you don't want to see her, DO AS I TELL YOU AND DON'T COME IN HERE!" With that, he stormed towards his office.

Drusilla didn’t bother to watch him go as she settled on the stool to wait for William’s return.


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*


Please review if you have the time :) Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, they're fun to read and they do inspire me to find the time to sit down and write. I appreciate it!

William eyed Buffy cautiously. She walked, ramrod straight, by his side, ponytail bouncing wildly with every vigorous step. He still wasn't sure exactly what had happened to set her off, though he wasn't completely dim, he'd seen the two girls decidedly disliking each other on sight.

Now she stood at the bus stop, body tensed, poised for action, but what action or what form it would take, he wasn't sure. He kept his gaze on his trainers and remained wisely silent.

"You don't have to stand with me." Buffy said, staring steadily at the passing traffic. "This is a busy corner. I'll be fine. I don't want you to get in trouble."

He looked up at her. "Buffy, is something wrong? Are you upset about what happened at the gym?"

'Yes,' Buffy thought truthfully, 'but not about what you think.' She also thought she was beginning to have an inkling as to just why she was upset too, which only served to confuse her more. She sighed and relaxed her stance a little as she answered, "Yes, I guess so," and looking directly at him said, "It was a little scary. Kinda wigged me out, you know?"

"Yeah, it was," he paused. "Guess you signed up for lessons, then?" At her nod, he said softly, "Well, I'll walk you out here afterwards, if you like. Make sure no one bothers you. You'll need to be careful getting here though." He looked around, "It's not all that bad an area, but some of the guys at the gym are a little... and if they've noticed you…which they did..."

"I'm going to try to get here right after school, earlier than I did today. Maybe I can avoid a little hassle if I do. You know, less crowded and also – more daytime! Always of the good. But thanks, the offer is appreciated." Buffy suddenly smiled at him, a genuine, unforced smile and William felt a curious lightening feeling all over. He'd been carrying around so much stress and worry and sadness and hadn't realized how much it was weighing him down until that one smile somehow managed to lessen the horrible, smothering load for a moment. He wasn't certain why that should be so, but the tension eased…and he was ok, like he hadn't been since, well…awhile; he was ok, if only briefly.

Buffy glanced down at the sidewalk and continued, "I don't know if I thanked you for earlier, it's kinda hazy, but if I didn't…thanks." She met his eyes again shyly and looked like she was about to say something else, but the bus pulled up.

"You're welcome, luv." William replied. She shot him another smile and hopped onto the bus.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Weaving quickly through the throng of students, Buffy fumbled the books for her next class and dropped one, sending it flying across the hall. An irritated noise escaped her as she headed for the fallen book. 'Thank goodness it's Friday,' she thought. She was surprised when, before she could rearrange the other books to bend down and pick up the escapee, a gentle hand was placed on her shoulder and the errant book was held out in front of her. She mumbled her thanks and took it, preparing to race off again and then she stopped, taking in just who had helped her. "Ummm…thanks, Angel." Buffy said and recovering, turned to go.

"Wait," Angel said, tightening his hold almost imperceptibly on her shoulder to prevent her from leaving. At her flinch, he removed the offending hand and let it drop to his side. "Buffy, could we talk?" He knew her face well, knew her every expression, so he saw the refusal coming and said hurriedly, "Please? Just for a few minutes? After class maybe? Before lunch?"

Buffy studied him warily, his tone was undeniably sincere and the confident, easy arrogance he shrugged on daily as naturally as his football uniform was absent. She'd rarely seen him like this in the two years they'd dated. She sighed; she was going to be late. "Fine. Before lunch. No closet!"

Angel winced, "No closet. One of the benches by the south side ok?"

Buffy nodded.

"Ok, see you then." Angel disappeared into the lessening crowds, leaving a somewhat stunned and definitely puzzled Buffy in his wake.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy perched on the end of the bench uncomfortably. Angel sprawled on the other end, keeping a respectful distance.

Buffy waited.

After a few minutes, she said impatiently, "Angel, I'm out here. You said you wanted to talk, but you haven't said anything."

He raised puppy dog brown eyes to her and said, "Well, I wanted to say I was sorry. That's one thing."

Buffy shook her head, "You already said that, remember? I told you I forgave you for my wrist. We had that conversation."

"Yeah, I know," he said, dipping his head, "I am so sorry for that, but you know that already. No, I wanted to apologize for the Cordelia thing."

Buffy had thought the pain of that had been mostly dulled, but hearing him say this brought a new unexpected pang to her heart. Annoyed at herself, she said, "I don't think there's anything to say about that." She clarified, "Well, there's nothing I want to hear from either of you. Not that Cordy's tried," she added bitterly.

Staring him directly in the face, she said, "You knew why I wanted to take a break. It wasn't some dumb fight, or jealousy that you looked at another girl or something equally stupid and petty. You knew. You knew I had a good reason." He lowered his eyes, unable to hold her gaze, "You knew I was afraid of you. You knew you'd hurt me, more than just this," she brought her cast up, "and we didn't say anything about whether the break was going to be permanent. So the next day, after two years with me, you're with my best friend?" She shook her head again, "Correction, former best friend. Now you want to apologize. Why? What's the point?"

Angel exhaled noisily, letting out a deep sigh of frustration, "Look, I know there's nothing I can do. I know it was wrong. I know I'm an asshole sometimes and I let my temper get away." He looked into her green eyes pleadingly and said simply, "I miss you." A hurt look came over his face as he reached a hand towards her and she drew back slightly. "I was mad. The Cordelia thing…I was mad. Two years and you didn't trust me anymore and the whole fight in the hall and the hanging out and hugging that guy…I was mad at you."

Buffy looked at him incredulously, "Wait, you were still upset about William?" At his nod, she said, "I told you I was just thanking him. I-" Realization hit her, "You weren't giving William such a hard time because of Harmony and Willow, you were angry at him about me…"

Angel said nothing.

"I told you there wasn't anything to worry about. William never did anything wrong and neither did I. It was just studying." Buffy experienced a mild pang of guilt as she uttered this statement, though she knew it was true at the time of the events they were discussing. No need to inform Angel about any possible recent changes in her feelings, she reassured herself, after all said feelings weren’t even official feelings yet, they were…almost…um wannabe feelings maybe, not real at all yet, really. It was none of his business now anyway and there still wasn't anything to tell and…Buffy cut her internal ramblings off abruptly. "You knew I loved you. There wasn't any reason to take it out on William. He did nothing wrong," she repeated.

Angel finally said, "I didn't like it. People kept coming up to me and telling me what fun you looked like you were having in the library and how he went to your house and-" he said softly, "I didn't like it, Buffy."

Floored, Buffy leaned back into the bench. She'd never seen him allow himself to show this much vulnerability before, cocky shell completely vanished so that he sat beside her, merely a hurt boy. The football playing elitist was nowhere in sight. "Angel, you didn't have to do what you did. We could've talked about it more…we could've…"

"Yeah, well he's not hurt is he?" He muttered darkly.

"Not for lack of trying!" Buffy shot back at him.

"Hey, Riley started that-" Angel protested and gave up. "Ok, I did what I did." He paused, "Look, I'd like for you to forgive me. I'd like for you to give me a second chance - give us a second chance." He waved off the protests as they died on her lips, "I'd like that, but I know you're still mad at me. Maybe some time would-" he looked at her almost wistfully, "but that's not all I wanted to talk to you about. I heard you're going out with Parker tonight."

Buffy frowned, "Yes, well… yes I'm going out with him - he told you?"

Angel nodded sadly. "Yeah, well uh, I wanted to say-" he stopped, unsure of how to say what he wanted to and then blurted out, "Don't. Don't go out with him, Buffy. He's bad news. I know you think you know him, but you really don't-"

Buffy stood up, "Angel, you can't tell me who to go out with. I know he's your friend and-" She shot him a significant look, "that's probably not making you feel too great, but-"

Agitated, Angel rose too and thoughtlessly put his hands on her shoulders, as if he wanted to shake into her the real motivation behind what he was saying. "NO! No, that's not it, I swear, Buffy. It's him, the way he treats girls-"

Buffy froze and said with steel in her tone, "Don't touch me, Angel." When his hands dropped, she started to leave and then said, "If he treated girls all that badly, don't you think I'd know? I mean, people DO talk." She shook her head at him. "I know he's a bit of a player, plenty of girls have said that, but…" She didn't want to add that she hadn't even accepted the date in the first place and thought it was likely to be the first and LAST date she had with Parker if she had any control over it. That was immaterial. It was none of his business.

Angel slumped back on the bench, head in his hands, and said, "He pretends he's older and picks up mostly college girls, Buffy. You haven't talked to any of them. You really don't know him." Angel's voice was now tinged with anger, "I knew you wouldn't believe me. Trying to tell you something for your own good and you think-" his tone was still low, but urgent, "He doesn't like you, Buffy, other than for what he can get from you. He won't be good to you."

Buffy had had enough. "Like you were? Angel, thank you for your concern, but I think I'm old enough to decide who I date on my own." With that, she left him on the bench alone.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy appeared at the gym promptly after school, already dressed and ready for her lesson. William took in her baggy, grey, oversized t-shirt and loose, black sweatpants. She saw him looking and grinned, "Borrowed 'em from my Mom. My camouflage! Thought it might be better, I won't stand out as much maybe. I'm going to shower and change at home, too." She shrugged, "Just be easier that way."

He smiled at her, "Much better, pet." The clothes didn't show anywhere near as much as the more blatant outfit she'd worn yesterday and they might make her a little less noticeable at a glance around the room, but he doubted she could ever blend in at the gym in any attire. "You should still be careful, though."

"Oh!" Buffy rummaged in her duffle bag, pushing aside her towel. "I've got this!" She held up a can of pepper spray proudly. She'd gone through Joyce's ‘city kit’, kept packed for occasional trips to L.A. and New York and appropriated the spray.

William gently pushed the can until it was facing down. "May want to watch where you point that." He grinned again and then sobered. "Mmmm, one thing though, pet, whoever's bothering you isn't going to wait for you to find that and pull it on him. You'll want to make sure you put it somewhere you can get to it fast. Preferably your pocket or maybe this outside pocket on the bag. That one's not ideal though, because you could drop it."

Buffy flushed, feeling silly, "Yeah, that would be good, huh. Can't exactly say, 'Hey Mr. Robber guy, could you hang on a minute? I need to grab the stuff that'll make you cry…’"

"Hardly," William laughed and pointed the way to one of the training rooms. There were no formal "rings" of any kind at the gym, but there were large private rooms for sparring and other activities that required room to spread out. He pushed the door open to one of these.

"You can drop your bag over there," he indicated a corner.

When she'd done so and was waiting expectantly in the center of the room, he said, "Ok, so yesterday, I taught you what?"

Buffy rolled her eyes but said, "Run, if I can."

"Right, so that's your goal and you said what if you couldn't run-" William approached her and stopped at arm's length. "Hold out your right arm." Buffy extended the appendage obediently. "Ok, so there are a few simple ways to break someone's hold on you." He grabbed her wrist firmly, but not hard enough to hurt and walked her through the exercise, teaching her how to maneuver her wrist and hand to break free. After she'd done this successfully several times, he showed her what to try if someone put his hands or arm around her throat.

This required getting a little closer to her than he was comfortable with, but he managed to conceal his nervousness fairly well, he thought.

As he talked and demonstrated, he was immensely grateful that he'd sat in on his mother's sessions while waiting for her. Her classes had been geared for women who didn't have much interest in martial arts, but did want to know a few ways to defend themselves. He could've started Buffy out with what he'd learned first, but he wanted her to learn some effective techniques immediately, not over long years of study.

They went over the vulnerable parts of the body and he pointed out parts that could be best used to inflict damage.

"Who would've thought my elbow was such a deadly weapon?" Buffy giggled and used said elbow to jab him lightly in the ribs.

"Yeah, well don't overlook the obvious - stomp on his foot, poke at his eyes, jab, hit, knee at any of those areas I showed you - anything to distract him so you can use the stuff you just learned to get away." William said seriously as he backed off. He thought she was doing pretty well. She picked things up very quickly. 'Must be the cheerleading and skating, she's a natural at physical stuff.'

Buffy was puzzled by the faint flush that appeared on William's cheeks at the unexpected thought that popped into his head after that one.

She pouted at him. "When do I get to learn the cool stuff? You know-" She brought her fists up, adopted a mock boxing stance and did a little hopeful kick in his direction. Buffy was having fun. Who knew learning to defend yourself could be so much fun? But she thought William was taming the lesson down for her too much, she wanted to start on the exciting harder things.

William laughed, "You know that phrase 'you have to learn to walk before you run', pet. Invented for you."

She pouted harder and toed the mat rebelliously. "I've got this stuff down. I can do the getting away part! I can do harder stuff!"

He raised an eyebrow at her, "Yeah?" She had less than a second's warning before he lunged and took her down to the mat, rolling so his body took the impact and her wrist wouldn't be jarred. He pinned her arms to her sides and her legs to the floor and laughed down at her. "Can you get away now?"

Buffy frowned and struggled ineffectively. "No."

"This is an important lesson too," he said, easily keeping her controlled. "There are a few things you could do, but it's far better to remember to never let anyone get you on the ground. It lessens your options and makes it harder to get up and away quickly, even if you do manage to get in a hit."

Big, green eyes stared up at him and he was suddenly very aware of the position they were in and the movement of her body against his as she tried to unseat him. Buffy's lips parted, soft and pink, opened slightly as though she was about to say something or…

The door creaked open. "Spike," Drusilla said sweetly and crossed the room to them, eyeing Buffy with distaste.

The moment was broken and he loosed his grip on Buffy's arms, jumping up to offer her a hand.

"Hello, Dru. You remember Buffy from the other day," he said.

Drusilla smiled insincerely in Buffy's direction. "Of course. May I borrow you a moment?" She plucked at his arm and led him a little ways away, but not far enough for Buffy to be unable to hear the conversation. Buffy concentrated on tying the laces on her shoes, but couldn't help listening.

"We're still on for tonight, yes?" Drusilla flicked an imaginary piece of lint off of the front of his black t-shirt and then kept her hand resting lightly on his chest.

William ran his hand through his hair, mussing it even further than the lesson had. "Sure. Eight thirty?"

"Yes and then we're all going back to my place afterwards." She tilted her head up at him thoughtfully, "You do need a retouch, you know."

He plucked her hand gently away and shook his head at her, grinning, "No way you're turning it blue this week. Not a chance."

Drusilla smiled and pouted playfully in mock disappointment, "But it might look good…" Amusement flashed in her eyes at his strangled protest in response, "Fine, fine, no blue. Only the bleach again. It does look good, you know it does. Maybe we’ll do it tomorrow?"

He shook his head and said firmly, “Can’t stay tonight, Dru. Have to get home for Jenny.”

Bringing a hand up to his cheek, she placed a kiss on the other, "Ok. We’ll figure out when. See you tonight, then." She didn't look at Buffy again as she made her way out.

Buffy had thought in the moment before the door opened that William might kiss her, but now she realized she must've misread him. 'He likes that singer,' she thought sadly, 'has a date with her and everything and let her change his hair to what she wanted and he stays over at her house… I'm just his job.' She grudgingly acknowledged the other girl's visible attractions to herself, graceful, tall and slender, long dark hair, pretty eyes - but she was so strange and unpleasant and ugh, had such terrible taste in clothes. 'Goth gone wrong,' she thought pettily.

Reflecting on her own short stature and generally perky attitude, she mused despondently that if that Drusilla girl was William's type, she couldn't compete. This was a relatively foreign concept to Buffy and she decided she didn’t much like it as she jerked the laces of her second shoe hard in frustration, pulling them tight.

William came over to her, offering his hand to help her off the mats.

"Got it," she said sharply, "thanks," and got to her feet herself.

"Right." William said, at a loss and wondering again at the sudden mood change Drusilla seemed to effect in Buffy whenever they met, "Umm, ok then. Good first lesson, yeah?" They walked to the door, "I'll just let Mr. Crawford know I'll need ten minutes or so and then we can go."

Buffy put her hand on his arm, staying him, "That's ok, William. I have the pepper spray, right?" She smiled at him and he couldn't help contrasting this smile with the sheer sunshine of the day before. This one looked strained and false and he frowned at her. "You sure? It's not a problem, I can just-"

"Yes, I'm sure." Buffy said, "You can't always be worrying about protecting me here. That's not fair, you have stuff to do. I'll be ok." She picked up her bag and was about to leave when he stopped her.

He looked into her eyes, "The lesson was ok, wasn't it? You're not disappointed are you?" A thought struck him, "Didn't hurt you, did I?" He said, instantly remorseful and wishing he'd been less impulsive. 'That's it, ponce, tackle the girl and hurt her first time out. Fine job, that.'

She gave him a half smile, "No, of course not. The lesson was great. I learned a lot," she said reassuringly, but then she thought, ‘I learned too much,’ and a briefly unhappy look crossed her face, belying her next words, "much more fun than the machines, too." She went to the door again, said, "See you Monday," and fled.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

End Note: Don't hate me too much, please! Thanks Brunettepet for making me think about Buffy’s safety going to and from the gym, I probably would’ve fudged right over that if it hadn’t been for your review. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, I do really enjoy reading them and appreciate that you take the time to leave me your thoughts on how the story is going. So uh, yeah, and on that note….please review? :)

“A good heart will help you to a bonny face, my lad ... and a bad one will turn the bonniest into something worse than ugly.” --Nelly

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy was waiting in the living room. She'd rushed home, quickly showered and applied her makeup. Choosing an outfit took only a few minutes; she opted for a small, short, black dress and high heels that would be fine for the restaurant and not look too out of place at the Bronze.

Dawn sauntered into the room and stared at the alien who had replaced her sister. "You're never ready early. I looked in your room and there isn't even the usual pile of clothes and shoes that were no good. What's up with that?"

Buffy sighed and flicked a wisp of hair out of her eyes. She looked at the delicate silver watch on her right wrist, she still couldn't get used to it there - stupid cast - there was a half hour to go. "I guess I just want to get it over with," she said. "I'm going, but you know, Parker isn't exactly who I'd like to be hanging out with tonight."

Dawn grinned, "Yeah? Who would you rather be going out with?" She plopped herself down on the couch next to Buffy. "Not still hung up on Angel?"

"No. Not Angel. Nobody really," Buffy said evasively, "just not looking forward to Parker."

Dawn laughed, "Ha! Don't know why that'd be. He's so fascinating." She batted her eyelashes at her sister exaggeratedly. "Hey! Maybe he'll ask you to go to the cotillion. Won't that be fun?"

Buffy groaned, "Please. Don't jinx me."

Dawn paused a moment and said, "Hey Buffy, this is the first year I get to go…and…"

Buffy turned to her, "…and?"

Dawn grabbed a pillow and rested her chin on it, "…and well, I know you're not too happy with Cordy right now and I know you don't have a dress yet and…well, neither do I and tomorrow's Saturday and the mall's you know, open on Saturdays and-"

Buffy regarded her sister with a fondness that she rarely let show openly and let her off the hook. "Hey Dawn, I don't have too much to do tomorrow. I'm kinda bored actually. You want to go and check out some dresses for the cotillion?"

Dawn's face lit up with a brilliant smile, "Yeah. Yeah, that'd be great." She mashed the pillow around a little. "Mom said she'd take me, but…" Both girls laughed. "Yeah, you know how she is. I'd end up in something up to my neck with ballet flats on my feet or something. Probably with a bow in my hair." Dawn shuddered.

Buffy laughed at Dawn's dismay, having been through the whole shopping with mom experience many times. "Not a problem. We'll find something good. The dance is kind of boring anyway; the shopping's the only good part." She giggled. "The guys are all wishing they weren't there, the girls are criticizing everyone else's dresses, and everyone's trying to figure out how to sneak out to the golf course without being noticed so they can hang out in peace. If someone manages to spike the punch it gets worse. Last year John Mills ended up in a golf cart in the middle of a water hazard." She made a face. "Oh and remember Mrs. Dell?"

Dawn rolled her eyes. "We only took ballroom with her for two years. Of course I do. She's a little bit—“

Buffy laughed again, "Yup, nutty. Year before last, she was in charge and she made us do all of these organized dances for hours. The guys were not happy, let me tell you." She mimicked her old teacher's quavering, yet imperious tones, "Back straight! Head up! Glide, don't stomp! Really girls, are you young ladies or elephants?" Dawn had joined in on the last line, having heard it a multitude of times over the course of her lessons. "She also totally went off on Megan Arthur for like ten minutes for 'misuse of a fish fork'."

Dawn giggled. "How do you misuse a fish fork?"

Buffy shook her head, "I have noooo idea. The rest of us were all, oooo she's distracted, thank God. I snuck out to the ladies' room around then." She paused, "But I know where to go to get our dresses. There are a couple of shops in town that are better than the mall. At the mall, there's the possibility, HORRORS," she said affectedly, "that you could end up in the same dress as someone else. That would simply not be suitable," she waggled a finger in Dawn's face then fell back into her normal voice, "You go to these places and the ladies steer you away from the stuff that someone's already bought. Lowers the chances of showing up in a duplicate." She looked down at her fingers, sobering, "Cordy used to drag me up to L.A. for stuff like that though, usually."

"What happened with Cordy, Buffy?" Dawn asked. “She never calls anymore.”

Buffy said lightly, "Turns out she wasn't that great a friend."

"What did she do?"

"Well, you know Angel and I broke up." Dawn nodded and Buffy continued, "She glommed onto him right away."

"Oh." Dawn looked thoughtful, "Buffy, did you really love Angel?"

Buffy said softly, "I thought I did. I mean, yeah, I thought I did." Then she frowned, "But now I'm not so sure."

"Well, not that I'm wishing depression and misery on you or anything," Dawn paused, "well, any more than I am usually." Buffy smacked her with another couch pillow. "But, shouldn't you have been, I don't know, a little more sad? And—" a sly look crept over Dawn's face, "I did notice the large pile of rejected clothes when you were getting dressed to go to the gym yesterday…" 'Score!' Dawn thought and nearly laughed aloud at the 'deer in headlights' look on her sister's face. "There is a new guy," she said gleefully, reveling in her sister's discomfort.

Buffy picked at the stitching on the pillow. "Maybe." She said noncommittally. "Can you keep a secret? I mean, you're acting sort of human today," Dawn snorted, "and I can't really talk about this to anyone else so..."

Dawn bounced up excitedly, "I can keep a secret!"

Buffy swallowed nervously, "Uh…there might be someone I like…"

Dawn said impatiently, "C'mon Buffy, that's not a secret, I just said that. Who is it?"

"William." Buffy blurted out quietly. "But it doesn't matter, I mean, I don't think he likes me that way and-"

Dawn snorted again, "Your tutor? The guy that was over here? I told you he likes you." She grinned, "He does have a really cute accent…"

"Yeah, he does, doesn't he?" Buffy smiled. "But no, he's going out with someone else tonight so-"

"So are you. You like Parker?" Dawn said pointedly.

"No. But I do think he likes this girl…why-" Buffy looked at Dawn, "why do you think he likes me?"

"C'mon, Buffy, haven't you noticed the way he looks at you? He really likes you." Dawn rolled her eyes at her sister's obtuseness. "All you have to do is tell him you like him and voila - you've got a new boyfriend."

Buffy sighed, "It's not that simple, Dawn."

"Sure it is!" Dawn replied cheerfully, but before she could say anything else, Joyce entered the room.

"Dawn, could you leave us for a minute? I'd like to talk to Buffy." Joyce said.

"Uh yeah, sure." Dawn got off the couch and headed for the stairs, "Don't forget tomorrow, Buffy!" She got a few steps up and turned back, "And he so does." She winked and hopped up the rest of the way.

Buffy shook her head, hoping she wouldn’t regret that moment of indiscretion, and turned her attention to her mother, now sitting beside her.

"Buffy, you know you don't have to go out with Parker if you don't want to, don't you?" Joyce said with a concerned look on her face.

Buffy looked back at the pillow, "I know, Mom. But it's easier if I do, isn't it? Anyway, I did say I would." She shrugged and smiled wryly, "That'll teach me not to pay attention. It's just one night. No big."

Joyce brushed back the wayward strand of hair Buffy had tried to tame earlier. "I know. But I wanted you to know that you don't have to go just because your father wants you to." Her lips firmed, "He'll be gone after next week again anyway, to Hong Kong this time, for six weeks."

"It's ok, Mom. Really. It's not like I don't know Parker." Buffy said calmly, seeing her mother's distress. "Six weeks, huh? Longer than last time."

Joyce sighed. "Yes, sometimes I wonder why they can't get one of the younger men to go. The ones without families…" She smiled, but her eyes still looked worried and Buffy wondered when her mother had started to look so very tired. "But, you know your father. No one can do as good a job as he can."

"Yeah." Buffy said.

The doorbell rang and Buffy rose to answer it. Joyce laid a hand on her arm, gently and said low, but emphatically, "Just know that you don't have to do everything he says, Buffy. You can talk to me and we'll work things out. I know sometimes he pushes and I worry-"

Buffy covered her mother's hand a moment, smiled and said, "Have to get the door, Mom."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Parker was unexpectedly pleasant and interesting as they ate dinner at an upscale steakhouse downtown. Buffy wasn't sure where this Parker had come from and was thrown off balance by it. They both weren't looking forward to the cotillion and found common ground discussing humorous stories from past dances. She supposed she shouldn't be so shocked that Parker could find something to talk about with her that wasn't on the topic of himself for once, but she was a little surprised he was actually making the effort.

He was sort of handsome, she thought grudgingly, and charming when he wanted to be.

The food was good and Buffy found herself relaxing as they ate dessert.

"So," Parker said, smiling, "where to next?"

Buffy raised her eyes from her sorbet, "Oh! Um, well, you'd mentioned the Bronze. I mean, that'd be good."

Parker ducked his head a little shyly, "You sure you want to go there? There'll be a ton of people and well, I was hoping we could go somewhere by ourselves." He shot her a winning smile. "I must confess that I wasn't devastated to hear that you two broke up. Angel's been monopolizing you these past years; I was hoping to get to know you better." He flashed her another grin at this. "After all, I don't know grown-up Buffy very well at all, always seeing you in those big crowds of friends…or out to dinner with the parents."

Buffy floundered awkwardly at this and decided to just come out with it, "Parker, why did you ask me out tonight? I mean, like you said we've known each other forever and we've never—there's never been—"

He reached across the table and took her hand, stroking it lightly, voice sincere, "Maybe I've never had the chance. Angel's always been in the picture, hasn't he? C'mon, Buffy, is that so hard to believe?"

She freed her hand, giving his a pat as she did so, "Parker, I'm just not sure…it's so soon after Angel and…I think I need a little time to—"

"No problem, Buffy. I totally understand." He looked a little disappointed, but said, "We'll head to the Bronze as planned."

Buffy smiled in relief, "Ok, sounds good."

"Shall we?" He pulled her chair out for her and they left the restaurant.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

'Stupid.' Buffy thought. 'Of course, they were going here. She sings here." They'd arrived at the Bronze at nine thirty and the band was in full swing. Drusilla was luminous in white, swaying and singing in the spotlight, playing to the room like a good entertainer, but Buffy noticed her gaze went to a table in the corner frequently and was unsurprised to spot the gleam of William's hair at said table.

Suddenly, she realized she didn't want William to see her with Parker. She tugged at Parker's arm, "Let's sit over there?" She pointed to a vacant table in the dark corner on the opposite side.

Parker smiled and acquiesced, leading her over to the table she'd indicated. "We're lucky to get a spot at all," he commented. "This band is pretty good."

Buffy gritted her teeth slightly, but admitted, "Yeah, they are. A little downbeat for my taste, though."

He pulled out her chair and said, "But great for slow dancing," and winked at her.

'Ugh,' Buffy thought, 'dancing is not of the good when hiding.' "You know, I'm feeling kind of mellow tonight, not really in a dancy mood. Let's just hang here, ok?"

"Whatever you like," Parker sketched a bow at her, "What does my lady desire to drink?"

"Uh, diet coke, thanks." Buffy said and Parker left for the bar.

Buffy studied the blond head across the room intently, but couldn't see William's face. The dim, moody lighting of the club was perfect for hiding, but less good for observing. She noted that there were a few people sitting with him, but couldn't tell who they were. Sighing, she wondered how long she had to stay before she could gracefully end the date. It didn't matter that Parker had been nicer tonight than he'd ever been, or that he'd told her in no uncertain terms that he was interested in her. Even if Angel hadn't warned her off, she wasn't interested in Parker. Since the moment she'd admitted it to Dawn earlier, Buffy had been consumed with thoughts of William. If she was honest with herself, he’d occupied her thoughts longer than that. Maybe her sister was right and he did like her. Maybe he was just too shy to tell her so.

Buffy looked at Drusilla performing onstage and rolled her eyes at herself, 'Maybe he's got a ton of other stuff to think about and one of them is standing up there looking all seductive and sophisticated and cool.' She snorted, she didn't think seductive, sophisticated or cool were words that would be applied to her any time soon. 'Cute, pretty, maybe beautiful on a good day,' she thought dispassionately, 'cool and sophisticated, not so much.' As for seductive, Buffy's experience in that arena was…limited and she felt a little silly whenever she tried for sexy. Buffy knew she could dance provocatively, but take her off the dance floor and giggles were more likely to come out than sexy purrs. The dance floor wasn't a "real" place to Buffy, so she could let herself go without fear. But being alone with Angel had been very real and far more awkward.

Parker finally returned with the drinks after what seemed like forever and set Buffy's in front of her. "Sorry, the line at the bar was crazy," he said.

Buffy took a sip and wrinkled her nose. Parker’s attention was on the stage and he missed her sudden frown. He'd somehow gotten alcohol in the drink. Buffy wasn't familiar enough with liquor to know what exactly, but whatever it was she knew she didn't like it. She pondered what to do. She certainly wasn't going to drink the stuff, it tasted nasty and from a couple painful past experiences, she knew she and alcohol were definitely not mixy. Parker could've asked her if she wanted alcohol instead of assuming, she thought, annoyed.

"Hey, be right back, I'm gonna go say hello to the guys," Parker got up, "unless you want to say hi too?" He looked back at her.

Buffy shook her head. "Nope, like I said, feeling kind of quiet tonight. Say hi for me." She smiled and thought, 'Good, ok…this tastes horrible, what can I—' she spied a tray of empty glasses and bottles nearby that the waitress had left unattended momentarily. 'Thank goodness.' Buffy tipped most of her drink into one of the glasses and went back to the table.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy checked her watch. Parker had now been gone for a full half hour. 'Ok, when does it become ok to try to get home,' she thought. 'If this is how he treats someone he's interested in, it's no wonder he's never had a long term girlfriend.'

"Buffy!" Parker slid into the chair next to her and wrapped his arms around her. She flinched and edged away as much as she could. "Sorry I was gone so long!" He nudged her ear with his nose and then nipped at the lobe with his teeth.

Buffy put a hand on his arm, trying to push him away. He was acting like a completely different person. She looked more closely at him and noticed his eyes were a little glassy.

Instead of backing off, Parker pulled her tighter into the circle of his arms. "C'mon Buffy, don't be mad. I wanted to come back sooner," he said. "I see you enjoyed your drink," this was accompanied by a broad smile. "So, surely you're feeling a little more relaxed and friendly now aren't you?" He stroked one of Buffy's bare arms slowly down and then up again, lingering by her breast on the upstroke. "A drink always relaxes me and after all you got us this nice, dark table..."

Buffy stared at him disbelievingly, they'd talked about how she felt at dinner, why was he so aggressive all of a sudden? What could make him think she'd changed her mind?

"C'mon baby, Angel told me you're slow to warm up, but once you're into it, you're an animal." He leered at her, "Won't you warm up for me? There's a nice private pool house waiting for us back at my place."

Buffy's eyes widened, "Angel would never-"

"Oh Angel did, sweetheart. You think he didn't share all," he rolled the word on his tongue, "the kinky details with us? Hey don’t worry, it only made you look even better," he said, licking his lips suggestively and staring knowingly into her eyes.

“No! Parker, no! Let me go!” He didn’t release her and Buffy had had enough. The band was on a break and the filler music was very loud. No one in the vicinity was paying any attention to her and Parker and she wasn’t sure she could count on anyone nearby to intervene. Parker's hand moved to cup her breast and she reacted quickly. Positioning the heel of her shoe just perfectly, she brought it down as hard as she could on his toes and when he dropped his hands, shot her hand at his nose as best she could with his current proximity. It was an attempt at one of the moves William had gone through quickly that afternoon and involved bending her hand back at the wrist and hitting the target with the bottom of her palm to prevent wrist injury. Hurting her uninjured wrist was the last thing she needed to happen.

Buffy had a fleeting second to think with satisfaction, ‘Ok, need to practice that, but the distraction part worked pretty well,' as he abruptly let her go completely and brought his hands to his face. Buffy grabbed her purse and fled into the crowd before he could recover.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy had thought of asking one of her friends for a ride home, but they all looked like they were having a good time and she really didn't want to explain what had happened. Besides, what Parker had said about Angel was making her head ache. She didn't know if it was true or not, but she had no desire to see Angel.

Hanging around until Parker found her was not an option. She quickly exited the Bronze and ran down the street towards the safe haven of the diner. The sound of her heels tapping the concrete loudly in the relative quiet outside the club unnerved her and she hastened to get inside the diner's cheerfully lit interior.

Once there, she flipped open her cell and pushed the speed dial number she wanted.

"Mommy?" Buffy said and the stress of the last few minutes hit her, making her voice shaky, "Could you come get me?"

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

End note: A huge thank you to Caia who sent me an email that described the move Buffy used on Parker in this chapter. Caia also left a method of getting out of the ‘on the ground with someone sitting on top of you’ situation in her review of the last chapter if you want to check it out. She wanted to make the point that you can always do *something*in a bad situation. Thanks very much for your help and useful information, Caia.

Please review if you have the time :) Thanks to everyone who reviewed so far! Even if it’s criticism, I like to see what you think.

Dru's hypnotic voice washed over William as he sat at the table with her friends. She'd introduced him earlier and they were nice enough, but he wasn't in a very social mood. He'd only come out to avoid the quiet emptiness that waited for him at home. Jenny was out this evening, at dinner with some friends, and he couldn't bear sitting in his room alone. He'd thought to go to the hospital and sit with his mother, but she was adamant that he go out and have some fun. So he was here, at the Bronze, listening to Dru and sipping a coke that really was a coke this time. But he couldn't call it fun.

Dru's friends were an odd bunch on the surface, not surprisingly. The girl who sat to William's left, Liz, had bright tufts of cotton candy pink hair that stuck up in wild, but no doubt carefully sculpted swirls atop her head. Her eyes were dark and animated and she was quick to laugh. She'd been babbling nonstop at William since he'd sat down and he found it mildly uncomfortable that he was having some difficulty concentrating on what she was saying and not being mesmerized by her multiple facial piercings and elaborate metallic eye makeup. He thought she was rather pretty underneath all of it. Dan, her date, sported a mass of blazing red dreadlocks and a Haunted Exile T-shirt, that, Liz explained, he'd designed for the band. Sam, the last of the trio, was nearly seven feet tall, towering over everyone when he stood. He seemed morose, contributing to the conversation in monosyllables when necessary and spending most of his time staring into his beer.

Liz took a breath and William looked up at Dru and sighed. He wasn't a complete fool, Dru had been dropping ever less subtle hints that she wanted to be more than his friend, though for the life of him, William couldn't understand why. She was older than he was, for one, why would she be interested in a high school student? They had little in common besides country of origin and a fondness for music. He certainly wasn't up for partying at this particular time, nor had he ever been the partying sort even before his current circumstances. But, the signs were pretty clear, even to someone as inexperienced in interacting with the opposite sex as William was. Dru touched him at every opportunity, greeted him with kisses and stared meaningfully into his eyes often, as though searching for something.

He didn't know how to handle it. She'd been a good friend to him so far, getting him the job and all, and he didn't want the situation to become awkward. He didn't know what was wrong with him anyway, Dru was undoubtedly beautiful and interested in him, a combination William had never thought he'd come across. He sighed again. Dru gyrated on the stage in front of him, staring into his eyes, but images of Buffy danced through his mind.

William knew Buffy would never be interested in him that way, but he couldn't stop thinking about her. His mother and Buffy were foremost in his thoughts these days. One caused him pain and the other - when the sadness was overwhelming, thoughts of Buffy provided a needed respite. Despite the fact that he hadn't thought she should be at the gym, his spirits had lifted when she'd told him she would be there on a regular basis. The awkwardness and embarrassment he'd been feeling had eased some, and he was left with the simple pleasure of her company that he'd admittedly missed since the end of their study sessions.

Logically, he knew Buffy's next boyfriend would come from her circle of friends, perhaps that Finn git. At least Finn seemed a better choice than Angel, though he didn’t seem terribly bright. But for a moment this afternoon Buffy had caught him off guard, when she'd looked up at him with those green eyes widening in what…surprise? He didn't know. He did know he'd had the sudden desire to kiss her and that he was glad Dru had interrupted when she did, sparing him the inevitable rejection. He didn't need to see those green eyes flood with pity and witness her struggling to let him down easily without hurting his feelings. He had no doubt that was what he would've seen; his Buffy was a kind girl and wouldn't want to cause him more distress. 'His Buffy'. Well, in his thoughts she could be, but the last thing she needed was another bloke directing unwanted advances her way.

No, he'd be careful to remain professional and not jeopardize the opportunities he did get to spend time with her. That was the best course of action.

He took another sip of his drink and turned back to Liz who was just embarking upon a new topic.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Afterwards, they all went back to Dru's. William sat next to Oz in the corner of the living room, waiting for Dru and Faith to return with drinks. William liked Oz best of Dru's crowd, finding the laidback, laconic guitarist soothing to be around. Oz, whose hair was currently green, was currently lazily picking out a new tune on his guitar.

Devon came over to join them. "Hey," he said, bringing a cigarette to his lips.

"Hello." William said.

Oz nodded at Devon.

Devon turned to William. "So you're in for it." He laughed. "My sister's talking about taking you shopping for some new clothes tomorrow, first thing. She's thinking retro - punk to be specific."

William's eyes widened. "My clothes are fine." He said emphatically, and shook his head, "I already told her I can't stay over like I did-" he mumbled, "that was a bad night…"

"Yeah, well, you know girls always want to change something about their boyfriends, don't they?" Devon grinned and shrugged, "Maybe she thinks she can change your mind on the staying over."

William looked at him, tongue-tied for a moment, and then regained his ability to speak, "Boyfriends?"

Devon's eyes twinkled in amusement, "Yeah, isn't that what you are? I know it's what she wants anyway. Kind of obvious."

"She's-" William paused, "Look, Dru's been very nice to me, well, barring the hair thing, she's been great, really. But I'm not looking for a girlfriend at the moment." Faint irritation crossed his face and his earlier feelings came out in a rush to her brother. "Why does she even want me anyway? I'm years younger, in high school even! Don't girls like older guys? We don't like most of the same things and some of the time I can't even understand what she's saying."

"Not alone in that. Dru's ummm different. My mother used to call her 'artistic' back when things between her and Dru were slightly better." Devon smiled, "As for why…Dru loves a project. Says she sees 'hidden potential' beneath the surface. Sometimes I think to her men are just more dolls for her to dress up and play with."

"Dolls?"

"Yeah, she's got a thing for dolls. You didn't notice her collection?" William shook his head; he hadn't noticed much of anything that morning he'd been so focused on his mother. Being half blind hadn't helped his powers of observation much either. Devon continued, "She's named them all and fusses with them constantly. She's the only grown woman I know who continues to have tea parties." He chuckled, "Her favorite is Miss Edith and that one's very particular." He rolled his eyes. "She says Miss Edith likes you and that's a point in your favor."

"I haven't, uh, met Miss Edith." William said slowly.

Oz looked up from the guitar and said seriously, "Hint: don't say you don't like tea."

Devon laughed again, "Yeah, look, Dru can be a little wacky, but she's had kind of a tough life. Our parents split the family when we were young and Dad took me here. She got stuck with Mom in London."

"Your Dad isn't always-" William didn't want to offend, "well, very nice to Dru, I notice. Is that why she stayed there?"

Devon quieted and said simply, "No. My mother is worse."

William felt sorry for Dru if that was the case, but he didn't know what to say. Fortunately, Oz found the melody he'd been seeking then and asked them to listen and tell him what they thought. William was happy to lean into the wall, the conversation effectively ended.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William left Dru's at around one. Sam had brought over some drugs and Dru's eyes were already glassy and her behavior even odder than usual at that point, so although William hadn't seen her taking anything, it was fairly clear that she had. Uncomfortable, he'd made his goodnights and set out for home.

He'd successfully managed to avoid Dru's attempts to lure him away from the others, first by pretending not to notice her unsubtle hints and then by involving himself in a lengthy conversation with Oz and Devon about writing lyrics.

William hadn't written anything for awhile, not since before his father died. He vaguely remembered what it felt like to be inspired and have the words flow onto the page effortlessly and also conversely, the frustration on the days he had to wrestle each one out painfully, striving to express what he wanted despite his uncooperative state of mind. He'd dabbled in poetry mostly, in addition to his diary entries, and though he didn't think his poems were very good, they were his own; his thoughts, his feelings, were preserved on the smooth cream paper of his journal and it was enough to know that they were there. He never showed them to anyone.

After his father died, the pages remained blank. His journal sat untouched on his nightstand, favorite pen atop it, waiting for him to open it and pour out his feelings in ink. He never did.

He didn't know why, but the urge to write had entirely deserted him and unlike the periodic dry spells he'd had before, he felt no inclination to struggle through this one. He felt akin to the blank pages. There was nothing in him.

He hadn't thought about writing since, until tonight. Talking to Devon and Oz about their words and their writing process had opened a tiny chink in the nearly tangible wall that seemed to have been erected around the creative part of his brain.

He climbed the stairs to his room, flipped the light on and reached under his bed. Removing his formerly beloved and slightly battered brown leather journal and the fat black pen, which his father had received for some work achievement, from the box in which they'd been immured for so many months, he lay down on his bed and opened to a fresh page. The pen swept over the paper unhesitatingly, forming fluid curves and loops of black ink on the pristine paper.

William paused and smiled, looking at the lines he'd written. It felt so right, like a puzzle piece slipping firmly into its place with a satisfying click. He put his pen to the page again.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Buffy rolled over lazily, waking slowly, blinking in the bright sunshine streaming through the window. Her dreamy state lifted and the events of the previous evening came back to her. 'Ugh, Parker,' she thought. 'Slime.' She pushed the covers off and sat upright, swinging her legs off the bed.

The conversation with her mother had been surprisingly easy to endure. Buffy had said enough to explain her call and need for a ride and no more. Her mother would've called his parents in a heartbeat had she told her everything and Buffy didn't think she could deal with any more that night.

She frowned, thinking of the abrupt change in Parker's behavior. She still didn’t understand. The date hadn't been going all that badly until the Bronze and she hadn't had any felt any uneasiness or had any warning signals before he'd accosted her. Suddenly, it all clicked and her eyes went wide with the realization. There had been something in the drink. That was the only thing that would account for how he'd acted.

'Bastard!' She thought angrily. He'd put something in her drink. She shuddered at the thought of what might’ve happened had she gone along with Parker’s request for a quieter, less crowded venue for the remainder of their date and Angel's warnings came back to her in full force. For a moment, she felt bad about her accusations about his motives in warning her away from Parker, but then she recalled what Parker had relayed about Angel and confusion reigned again. She groaned. Parker's believability was totally shot, of course, but what he'd said stuck in her mind and stubbornly refused to be completely discounted.

She worried her bottom lip anxiously. Buffy felt she ought to do something about her suspicions regarding Parker's little addition to her drink, but she had absolutely no proof with which to go to anyone. She turned this problem over in her head for a few minutes and regretfully decided that she couldn't do anything official at all. Fuming in frustration at this, she realized that this was probably how people like Parker were able to continue to operate as they did. With nothing but vague feelings and suspicions, there was nothing she could do.

"Ugh!" Buffy said aloud and grabbing her robe she stumbled to the bathroom to get ready for her shopping trip with Dawn.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

End Note: Reviews would be lovely :) PS: Yes, Spuffier chapters are coming soon.

"Kinda hard to accessorize this cast." Buffy laughed ruefully, looking wistfully at the jewelry in front of her.

Dawn looked up from the adjacent display case and said, "I don't know, we can get some glitter and glue and sparkle that right up." She giggled and pursed her lips thoughtfully, "I think some tasteful crystals would do wonders."

Buffy put her other hand to good use and smacked her little sister lightly on the arm. "Sure, sure, mock my fashion nightmare."

Dawn laughed again and said slyly, "I'll bet William would like the way you looked no matter what we did to it."

Buffy blushed and quickly turned her gaze back to the earrings she was considering. "You promised not to say anything about that."

Dawn snorted. "Oh yeah, right, I forgot, I was being 'sorta human' at the time, right?" She sniffed. "Maybe I've reverted again."

"Yeah, that was a given."

"Seriously though, Buffy, are you going to ask him to go with you? I mean, it didn't seem like the Parker thing went too well, Mom picking you up and all. Why did she, anyway? What happened?"

Buffy frowned. "No. It didn't go well." She turned to Dawn and said seriously. "Just don't go anywhere near him ok? He's not a good guy."

"Ok, ok, don't tell me what happened. I'm a little kid, blah, blah, blah." Dawn waved her hand in the air and turned back to the jewelry.

"I mean it, though. About Parker. Stay away from him." Buffy repeated, her hand falling on her sister's arm to get her attention. "Please."

Dawn scrunched up her face and shook her off. "Ok, got it. He's boring anyway and way too old. But really, are you going to get William to go with you?"

It was Buffy's turn to wrinkle her nose. "I don't know, Dawn. I think he's with that other girl. She's always touching him and hanging all over him and stuff and it's not like he's shoving her away."

"Is she pretty?" Dawn asked sympathetically.

"No, she's not pretty," Buffy said slowly.

"Oh well, you're really pretty and we know he likes you so—"

Buffy frowned again and cut her off. "She's kind of beautiful. If you like the type."

"What type?"

Buffy waved the salesman over and pointed at the emerald and diamond platinum drops she'd selected. Holding one up to her ear, she said, "What do you think?"

"They look great." Dawn smiled. "They'll go with the dress perfectly. But— are you sure it's ok to spend this much on our stuff? Those are kind of expensive and with the necklace..."

Buffy smiled, "Mom's words, and I quote, were, 'Buy whatever you want. If your father wants you to go, he can afford it.' I think she's mad at him again." She turned to the salesman. "I'll take these and the bracelet and necklace that match, thanks." Looking back at Dawn, she said, "That's not entirely true, we do have a budget, because Mom didn't want us to come home with something like the Hope diamond, but we haven't reached it yet. Did you find anything?"

"These." Dawn pointed at a sapphire set. "They'll look nice, won't they?"

"Perfect." Buffy took out her credit card and waited for the man to come back.

"So," Dawn prompted, "what type?"

Buffy sighed. "She's tall and thin. She has long, dark hair and perfect skin." She tapped the card on the case and said begrudgingly, "She sings pretty well. She's older than William, I think."

Dawn made a face. "So is there anything wrong with her?"

"Yeah, she's kind of insane and dresses awfully. But William doesn't seem to care."

"I still think he likes you."

Buffy smiled at her sister's staunch words. "Hope you're right." She took the dainty bags off the counter and handed over Dawn's. "Dresses. Check. Jewelry. Check. What's next?"

"Shoes!" Dawn crowed gleefully. "Oh, but I'm starving. Could we get something to eat first?"

"You're always starving. You're going to weigh like a million and one pounds someday."

Dawn stuck her tongue out at Buffy and said haughtily, "I'm growing. Unlike some people." She looked back at her sister and grabbed the shopping bags from her. "I'm taking these. Watching you juggle with one hand is fun, but takes too long and I'm STARVING." She strode out the door, long legs leaving Buffy in the dust.

Buffy caught up when Dawn stopped short abruptly a couple blocks away from the jewelry store. "Dawn—"

"Buffy," Dawn whispered, grabbing Buffy’s arm. "Is that William?" She jerked her head to indicate that Buffy should look across the street. "I thought I heard his voice, not THAT many Brits around here but—”

Buffy laughed, "Oh yeah, whispering is really necessary because—" her voice trailed off as she took in who was with William.

"That's her, huh?" Dawn said sympathetically. "I get what you mean about the clothes."

Buffy could see what had attracted Dawn's attention. William was protesting loudly from where he sat sprawled on a bench outside a store called Goth Gear. Drusilla was pulling at one arm, alternately laughing and pouting as she tried to pull him into the shop.

"Buffy, what happened to him?" Dawn whispered loudly.

"Oh. Uh, I'm not sure," Buffy said. "She changed his hair; I think I told you that. He got rid of his glasses. They broke during the—" She stopped.

"He's hot!" Dawn laughed at her sister. "No wonder you like him now."

Buffy scowled. "That has nothing to do with it. I started liking him before the—wait, what are we doing? We have to get out of here before he sees us." She tugged at her sister.

"They're gone." Dawn pointed. "See? She must've gotten him to go inside."

"Oh." Buffy said flatly. "Well, good. That could've been embarrass—" She rushed to catch up with Dawn who was halfway across the street. "WHAT are you doing?"

Dawn smiled innocently at her. "Shopping! C'mon," she said and headed into the store.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"Dawn!" Buffy whispered furiously, following her. "This isn't funny. Let's just go. I think he already thinks I'm like stalker girl or something."

Dawn didn't pause. She scoped the store out and spotted them in the back, near the boots. "Puhlease, I think I know what I'm doing. How long have I been your little sister? I've spied on you tons of times!" She waved a reassuring hand at her spluttering, infuriated sister and darted into a side aisle. "Fortunately, this place has perfect cover. It's crowded with lots of stuff and tiny little aisles. Plenty of hidey-"

"Buffy?" William stared at her curiously. "And…Dawn, was it?"

"Hi!" Buffy said weakly as Drusilla appeared at William's side.

"What are you two doing here?"

"Um." Buffy floundered.

Dawn piped up cheerfully. "Shopping! I'm thinking of going through a rebellious phase. How do you think I'd look in this?" She held up a black, vinyl top that had what looked like batwing cutouts along the neckline. "You getting anything?"

Tongue-tied, William held up a boot box while Drusilla's cool gaze took in Dawn's pastel pink mini.

"Dawn, put that away," Buffy said, cheeks flaming.

"Oh you're right, Buffy. It's too much, isn't it? For daytime anyway. Not sure if they'll let me wear vinyl at school anyway. Maybe something—" Dawn pretended to ponder the problem and looked at Drusilla as though she hadn't seen her before. "Hey, I really like your blouse. Maybe you could give me a few pointers? Help me out along with my uh first few outfits?"

Buffy nearly choked. Drusilla was wearing a spidery patterned, black lace, crop top with enormous belled sleeves and a skintight, red, knee-length skirt.

"Well, your sister was helping you," William said gently. "I'm sure she'll want to—"

"Oh, Buffy won't mind! She can't help me with this anyway. She's like, the anti-rebel. I need someone cool. Pleeeeease?" Dawn turned puppy-dog eyes on William.

Buffy caught Drusilla rolling her eyes, but mentally gave her sister a round of grudging applause at her expertise in manipulation as William said, "Well, if Buffy doesn't mind. Dru?" He turned to her and Drusilla had no choice but to smile and extend a hand to the younger Summers sister.

"I'll see what I can do." Drusilla managed before Dawn dragged her off to a rack across the store.

William stood awkwardly, arms cradling the box as he fiddled with his car keys. "So, uh, you're all for this rebellion? Helping the little Bit out with her change of style? Didn't think you two were all that close."

"She can be an ok kid," Buffy admitted. "Sometimes. This change came on somewhat suddenly. We were out looking for dresses for a dance. I think this is cotillion backlash." She grinned.

"Ah." William nodded. "A dance. You find something then? Dresses, I mean."

Buffy nodded and indicated the pile of shopping bags Dawn had dumped at her feet. "Everything but the shoes." She smiled. "That's where we were headed when she saw this place. Well, first food, then shoes. Dawn's starving. Though her new fashion obsession seems to have made her forget."

William frowned at the bags, "Er, shouldn't those be hanging or something?" Buffy gave him an odd look and he blushed self-consciously. "When I carry them for my mother, I know they need to be sort of—" He said softly, putting his box on the floor and picking up the dress bags. "Uh, up, so they don't wrinkle. Or something."

Something about the uncomfortable way he was holding the bags up, with the greatest care to prevent her dress from wrinkling struck Buffy as absurdly sweet. His hair might be different and his glasses were nowhere in sight, but William was still the same underneath. She smiled warmly at him. "Yeah, they do. My designated pack mule ran off."

"Yeah, that she did. In a hurry." William paused. "Dru and I were going to get something to eat before I take her home and go to work; would you two like to join us?"

Buffy hesitated. She wanted to see William longer, but tagging along with her little sister on his date with Dru seemed like a new low in third-wheeldom.

She saw him catch her pause and clearly misinterpret it, backtracking. "'Course you don't have to. Just thought I could drive you both home afterwards, save the dresses. But—"

"No, no—" Buffy said quickly. "I just— I didn't want to interrupt your date. That's all."

William reeled visibly. "Date? What date? Oh, you mean Dru? No— it's not— I mean, we're not—" He ran his free hand through his hair, agitated and made it stand up in curly little spikes. "Not a date." He finished somewhat coherently.

"Oh." Buffy smiled at him again. "Then we'd love to. Thanks." Though she could think of little she'd like to do less than spend more time with Drusilla and felt confident the reverse was also true, she was delighted that, in William's eyes at least, he and Drusilla weren't a couple.

"Really?" He smiled shyly back. "I mean, yeah, the Bit's got to eat. Can't have her starving. She looks thin enough as it is."

His hair was so cute when it was messed up, Buffy thought. But, oh, he had one side mussed and the other not. "C'mere," she said and leaned over to free the other side from the gel. "That's better. You had—" She gestured at his hair. "Unevenness."

William stared at her. "Yeah. Goes everywhere without the gel, too. Thanks."

"I like it that way." Buffy said.

"You do?"

"Yeah."

Dawn swept back in front of them, laden with two new bags. "Mission accomplished!" she said, satisfied, looking from her sister to William. "All set. Buffy, food now?"

Buffy handed her menu back to the waitress and played with her soda straw. The cheerfully loud atmosphere of the busy diner only served to highlight the awkward silence of their table. Dawn had managed to beat Drusilla to the seat at William's side, sliding into the booth next to him so triumphantly that Buffy wouldn't have been surprised to see her little sister stick her tongue out at the other girl; happily, Dawn refrained. Drusilla and Buffy were left sitting next to each other, each attempting to ignore the other's presence.

"So, um, Dawn, what did you end up getting, clothes-wise?" Buffy asked, desperate to make conversation. She wondered how she was going to explain the charges on Dawn's card to her parents. Somehow, she didn't think Dad would approve of whatever 'Goth Gear' Dawn had acquired. Maybe they could return the things and her father wouldn't bring it up.

Dawn raised her head from her milkshake and grinned. "I got the coolest leather pants and a tiiiiny little halter in blue, with black hearts and crossbones all over it and…" Dawn chattered away, listing her purchases one by one as Buffy groaned inwardly.

"Dru was really helpful," Dawn smiled at the girl opposite her. "You're pretty good, Buffy, but that was the fastest, whirlwind shop I've ever done. I got a lot of stuff!"

Drusilla smiled back at the enthusiastic teenager. "Wasn’t hard. You’re so tall and thin. Everything looked good on her." She directed this last to Buffy, who caught the subtle barb as she was meant to.

Buffy shrugged it off and joked, "Dawn hogged all the tall genes, rotten brat." Now Dawn did stick her tongue out at her sister.

"You're not all that short, pet." William interjected. "You're at least--"

"Five foot two.” Buffy scrunched up her nose. “Though on my license I plan to lie by an inch at least."

“If you ever get it!” Dawn teased.

Pointedly ignoring her, Buffy continued, "Darn grandmother on my Mom's side, giving me the curse of shortness. My parents are both pretty tall, like Dawn."

"Well, I think you're the perfect Buffy height." William laughed and warm, green eyes met his.

Dawn rolled her eyes and slurped at her chocolate shake.

"Thanks. They make all the good clothes for taller people though." Buffy mourned.

"They do," Dru agreed smugly.

Thankfully, the food was not long in arriving and Dawn set to making quick work of her burger and fries. William stared at her in awe. "Bit, take a breath, no one's going to take it away from you if you pause, I promise," he teased.

"Get cold, though." Dawn mumbled around a mouthful of fries. "Hate cold fries! Nasty!"

"Dawn, don't talk with your mouth full, that's disgusting." Buffy chided.

William laughed, "She's right about cold chips. They do taste nasty."

The table fell silent again as they ate their meals. Buffy looked longingly at Dawn and William's burgers, toying with the salad on her fork. Stupid salad. She'd ordered it in a moment of insecurity after Dru had ordered one. Now she wished she'd ordered the burger she really wanted.

Stupid peer pressure, she thought glumly. The phrase 'just say no to salads!' wandered through her brain and she smiled. Raising her eyes from the unappetizing mound of iceberg lettuce, she caught William looking at her again. She held his gaze a moment before he looked away and, smiling for a different reason now, stared at her plate again. That had to be good, right? She hoped Dawn was right.

Buffy didn't know why her instincts failed her when it came to William. Maybe it was that he was so different from any other boy she'd known. Maybe it was that weird multiple personality thing he had going on though. One minute he acted all cute and interested and the next he was all business-like and distant.

"So, Spike, we're getting together tonight again," Dru said. "Rehearsal this time. Oz is going to try out that new song…"

William paused, then said, "The one he was working on last night?"

"Mm hmm," Dru confirmed. "No lyrics yet, so I'm likely to be a bit bored…" She flashed him a smile.

"Oh, erm…" William set his burger down.

Dru tried a different tack, "Devon mentioned you two had a good time tossing possible lyrics back and forth. I think he's a bit stuck, to be honest, maybe you could help him out?"

William brightened visibly. "Yeah, that could be fun. I could drop by for a little while after work."

Buffy stabbed at her lettuce, bringing another crunchy, tasteless bite to her lips. This time it was Dawn she caught looking at her. Ow! And Dawn who kicked her under the table. She glared at her sister.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*


"What was I supposed to do?" Buffy slammed the front door after her sister stalked through, carrying their bags. William had been running late for work and had to rush off after dropping them.

Dawn snorted. "Oh, I don't know, maybe not let her ask him to her house right in front of you?"

"How on earth was I supposed to prevent that?"

"God, you're totally hopeless." Dawn hung the dress bags on the banister, dumped everything else at the foot of the stairs and turned to her sister. "You're supposed to tell the guy you like him. He's happy. You're happy. Kiss, kiss, smooch, smooch," she made exaggerated kissing noises, "and no more skanky band 'ho."

"Aaaagh." Buffy growled in frustration. "It's not that simple, Dawn. You've never dated anyone so you don't know. You don't just go up to a guy and say, hey, I like you, let's go out."

"Why not? That'd be way too easy, huh?"

"Yes. No--" Buffy's brow furrowed, "You just don't. Anyway, if he likes me, he should tell me, shouldn't he?" she finished triumphantly.

Dawn stared at her sister. "Yes. He should tell you. But if you're both all worried about getting shot down and neither one of you does anything--" She rolled her eyes. "You're both hopeless."

Buffy drew herself up to her full five foot two inches. "I am NOT worried about being shot down."

"Of course you are! You told me you were!" Dawn quoted in a whiny tone, "I don't think he likes me. I think he likes this other girl--"

Buffy shook a finger at her and spluttered, "You--you--just--you--” Then she sat heavily on the lowest step. "Yeah, ok, I'm afraid of being shot down."

"What happened at the store when I was away, anyway? Did you two get anywhere at all?" Dawn huffed. "I do all the work, give you the perfect opportunity to talk to him and you blow it?"

"No. I didn't. I didn't blow anything. I mean--” Buffy floundered. "We talked. Dawn, we've been alone together before, like, most times I've seen him I've been alone with him." She paused. "He did say they weren't on a date though."

"Ok,” Dawn sat next to her. "What else did he say?"

Buffy perked up a little. "He seemed kinda surprised I thought he might be on a date." She related the rest of the conversation, brief as it was.

Dawn stood up. "Yeah. So. Held your bags. Told you he wasn't on a date. Asked if you'd come to lunch so he could drive you home. Told you you were 'the perfect Buffy height'." She made a show of gagging. "That's probably like William's version of jumping on you. He totally likes you. But I've told you that already, like a million times." She grabbed a couple bags and started up the stairs.

"What makes you so sure about this stuff anyway? You've never even been on a date!"

Dawn informed her haughtily, "I watch soap operas. They tend to have a lot of people like you on them. Clueless. Miserable. You know."

"I am not clueless." Buffy frowned at her. "I'm not," she said stubbornly. "He let me fix his hair too. And I told him I liked it messy."

"Oh, well, that's good. I'm sure you'll be all over each other in no time." Dawn continued up the stairs and shot back, "You still owe me shoe shopping since we got interrupted by your lack of a love life."

Buffy sighed and declined to mention that following William had been all Dawn's idea. End of shopping truce, she thought.


*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*


William tapped his fingers on the steering wheel in time to the music as he drove down through the center of Sunnydale on Sunday morning. Passing the Goth Gear shop, he couldn't help thinking of Buffy. She'd looked so cute and completely out of place there. And her little sister...she was something. He hoped Dru hadn't picked anything too risqué for the girl.

He sighed and ran through the events of the previous day in his mind again. He’d wanted the chance to talk to Buffy more, maybe carry her bags in for her and have a few minutes at her house before work, but hadn't managed it. Dru had insisted on being dropped off last and he'd been cutting it close time-wise as it was, so he'd had to hurry off.

He didn't know what to think now. Buffy had seemed very interested in his relationship with Dru. Or lack of one. Was he imagining it, or had Buffy seemed happier when he'd said he and Dru weren't dating? Did she come to lunch just to get the ride home? Playing with his hair like that…she’d said she liked his hair…

He shook his head. And just who was taking her to that dance? Finn, probably.

Back to reality, he told himself as he pulled into the hospital parking lot.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

William opened the door to his mother's room quietly, not wanting to wake her if she was sleeping. He hoped to get in an hour with her before work; she seemed to feel better in the mornings.

A man was standing over the bed. He turned and William, shocked, dropped the book he'd brought.

"Uncle Ethan?"

"Uncle Ethan?"

"William." His uncle turned.

"What are you--?"

"Let's take this to the hallway, shall we? Your mother's still asleep." Taking his nephew by the arm, Ethan pushed the door open and gently shoved the boy into the hall. "It was my understanding that you visited at a certain time every day."

"I do. Well, most days I do, but I was-- Wait-- No-- what are you doing here?" William said. "Were you just going to visit my mother and never even see Jenny?"

Ethan shrugged, ruefully. "That was the plan. However, the plan's buggered now, I suppose."

William whispered angrily, "She thinks you're dead!"

Ethan ignored William's accusation, clapping his hand on his nephew's shoulder and walking him down the hall to an empty room. "Right. Well, it is good to see you, boy. How's she running, anyway?" At William's confusion, Ethan clarified. "Not your aunt. My baby. Are you taking good care of her?" He pushed William into the vacant room and shut the door firmly.

"Yes, yes, of course. I'm--" William shook his head, finding it hard to believe the man they'd all thought likely to be dead was standing in front of him. "She's fine."

"Good!" He patted the boy's shoulder again. "Now, regarding whether you've seen me…"

William stared at him, horrified. "I have seen you."

"No, you haven't."

"I have. I can't lie about that. Not to Jenny."

The older man stepped back and contemplated his nephew. "I'm very serious, William. You can't talk to anyone about seeing me here. I received word about your mother and had to come, but I hadn't planned on seeing anyone but Anne. "

"No, of course not. Why bother to contact your wife? Your wife who's been --"

Ethan chuckled. "My wife knows whom she married." He shrugged again. "Well, by now she should, certainly. Whether she's still happy with her choice is something you'd have to ask her yourself. However," he leaned closer to William, "how do you think I knew about your mother?"

William backed away. It was true that Jenny hadn't seemed all that grief stricken at her missing husband. He’d never come across her crying in a quiet room, as he'd found his mother several times after his father's death. "She knows you're fine?"

"Wish I could stay and chat all this out, but alas, I haven't the time." Ethan paused. "Suffice it to say I had a little financial disagreement with my partners and the partnership's dissolved. But that's none of your concern. What is your concern is that I'm going to move your mother to a hospital in L.A." He waved a hand to still the protests rising to William's lips. "I have an…acquaintance there whom I've known since college. He's in cancer research now and well regarded by his peers. Some of his patients refer to him as a magician." Turning to stare out the window, he said, "Had either your mother or my delightful wife told me about your mother's illness earlier, I would have sent Anne to him much, much sooner."

William broke in, "Can this doctor really help her?"

Ethan turned. "I don't know. But he's performed some apparent miracles in the past and your mother's case, from what I understand, isn't completely devoid of hope."

Anxiety clouded William's features again as he asked, "How much is this doctor? I don't know if Jenny told you but--"

Ethan waved the question away. "That's also not your concern. My disagreement was…profitable, shall we say." He smirked.

William took a few steps towards the door. "I need to go pack. Do you have the address where we'll be staying?"

"You're not going."

William whipped around to face him. "What?"

"You're not going." Ethan repeated. "You're staying here with Jenny. It's been discussed and decided."

Furious, William said through gritted teeth, "Not discussed or decided by me. I'm going. I'm not leaving her with strangers."

"You haven't got a choice. She can go and have a chance or stay and die," Ethan said coldly. "Regardless of which, you will remain here."

"You're a right bastard to talk about her like that." William spat. "And it sounds as though you're a criminal as well. Why should I trust you?"

"She's my sister," Ethan said bluntly. "Also, you're a minor. You have no say in this. I really must leave soon, so let's go and say hello to your mother. Try not to trouble her with unpleasantness. Act like a man, William, not a spoiled boy. This is best for everyone."

William bit back a fierce retort about Ethan's definition of manhood versus his own and followed his uncle out the door.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Anne held her son's hand, her frail fingers enclosed firmly in his warm grasp, but her eyes were on her brother. "I can't wait to hear the whole story on this one, Ethan," she said dryly.

"No need for that, at present. I'm a bit pressed for time." Ethan quickly explained about his plan to transfer her to L.A.

William bent over her and whispered in her ear, uncaring whether his uncle thought him rude.
"Mum, is this what you want to do? Do you trust him?"

Anne regarded her incorrigible brother and responded aloud, allaying her son's concerns. "He wouldn't lie to me about something like this. If he wants me to go, it's because he believes it will help."

"So, it's yes?" Ethan said impatiently, allowing his sister's small dig at him to pass unacknowledged.

"It's yes. Thank you, Ethan." Anne responded softly.

He was already on his way out the door. "I'll make the arrangements," he said, and left.

Anne looked into her son's worried eyes. "It's worth trying, William." She squeezed his hand lightly. "You'll be fine here with Jenny."

"It's not me I'm worried about," William said, his frustration evident. Not wanting to look at her, he stared at the rumpled bedcovers, "I don't understand why I can't go with you."

Anne stiffened and her voice took on a no-nonsense tone. "You'll stay here. You'll go to school." She lifted his chin gently with her other hand and made him look at her, repeating what she'd said the week prior. "You'll call me every day and Jenny will tell you everything she knows as soon as she knows it." At his rebellious look, she persisted, softer now, "And this will allow me to focus on getting well, because I'll know that I don't have to worry about you." She stroked his cheek.

"But we were in the middle--" he protested, weakly, gesturing at the book forgotten on the nightstand. "You'll be bored." And alone, he added silently.

"You can read it to me over the phone, William." She smiled. "I'll miss you too, you know."

"Yeah." He mumbled and stood up as she let her hand fall away from his face. "I'll do what you want, of course. Got to get to work now."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Anne's smile widened. Her son was so rarely a typical, belligerent teenager, that it amused her to see the stereotypically sulky expression on his face as he left. He'd get over it and see that it was for the best in the end. She felt better than she had in days. Even the tiniest bit of hope could prove to be miraculous medicine indeed.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

When William got home from work that evening, he saw Jenny sitting on the couch in the living room with a glass of wine. Dropping his bag, he made his way over to stand in front of her. He said nothing, merely looked at her and waited.

Jenny sighed, taking another sip before she responded to his accusing gaze. Then she said, "The car is yours to keep. You've been taking good care of it. You can use it to visit your mother in L.A. on the weekends." Her finger traced the rim of the glass. "Let me know if you need gas money." Finally, she met his eyes, but said nothing more.

William found he didn't know what to say either. In the end, he left his questions unspoken, merely muttering, "thanks," as he turned and headed up the stairs, leaving her alone.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"No, that would never happen!" Tara giggled at Willow's teasing.

William was only half paying attention. He'd just gotten to school after seeing his mother off and hadn't been participating much in the conversation, locked in his own thoughts.

He was now watching Buffy progress through the lunch line. She slid the tray along the rails, pausing at each station, but in the end, she’d chosen only a lone yogurt and a diet soda. The faint, half smile on his lips disappeared as he saw Finn come up behind her and seemingly volunteer to carry her tray to their table.

Watching another bloke cheerfully hit on the girl he wanted for his own was torturous, but he couldn't look away. So he saw her shake her head, smiling at the git though, how could she smile like that at the big… William's train of thought derailed. She'd evidently refused Riley's help, then paused a moment after handing her money to the cashier and was now headed straight at William.

His brain froze and he didn't even manage a smile as she stopped and directed her question to the table.

"Mind if I sit with you guys?"

He saw Willow's surprised look as she offered a chair and made brief introductions. Buffy said hello and sat across from him, opening her soda and yogurt. Then she smiled at him.

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

"So your Mom's in L.A. now?" Buffy asked, flipping her ponytail out of her face and dropping to the mats to sit.

He sat beside her, "Yeah. Hopefully, this new doctor will be able to help her. I don't know."

"I'll bet you'll miss her," Buffy said sympathetically, "but you can visit, right? And it's good, right?"

"Yeah, it's good," William said, flopping onto his back, tired. "I asked Mr. Crawford for Saturday off. I can drive up then."

"That'll be nice." She must've noticed the anxiety in his voice, because she switched topics quickly, "I wish I could drive!" She laughed. "It'd be so much easier than the stupid bus!"

He smiled. "Not sure the roads would be safe if you had your license, pet! I've seen you drive!"

She hit his shoulder then, pouting. "I'm not that bad. I got us there, right? All I need is a few more lessons with a good teacher who doesn't scream like Mom or shout like Dad and I'll be just fine."

He caught the gleam in her eye as she looked speculatively at him. "Oh, no." He shook his head emphatically. "I like my car. What is it with you?" He laughed, teasing her. "You want me to teach you everything, don't you?"

He noticed the strange look on her face and stilled, his laughter dying. "What?"

Edging closer to him, she laughed nervously. "Maybe I do." Then she leaned over him and pressed her lips against his in a tentative kiss.

Stunned, for a moment William lay completely still beneath her, not responding at all and Buffy, worried she'd made a horrible mistake, began to pull away.

He snapped out of his daze, realized what was happening and grabbed her, flipping their positions neatly. Buffy found herself lying flat on the mat, staring up into disbelieving, intense blue eyes. Her lips parted to say something, but William cut her off with another kiss. This one he actively participated in, and when it broke, he couldn't pull himself away from her lips, tugging her lower lip between his and nibbling gently.

When he paused, Buffy was surprised to see what she thought was apprehension on his face. She tilted her head at him, "Is something wrong?" He didn't answer and her eyes widened. "Omigod, you changed your mind and you really are with that Dru girl now and Buffy, the slut puppy stalker, just attacked you and kissed you against your will." Panic and sick embarrassment fluttered to life inside her and she tried to get up, propping herself on an elbow.

A smile chased away his worry and his eyes twinkled at her. "Buffy, the slut puppy stalker?" He laughed and a little of the sick feeling in her stomach eased.

"Yeah…uh…"

"Pet, you can stalk me anytime." He bent his head to hers and it was several minutes before conversation could resume.

She put a hand on his chest and pushed lightly. "You looked--I don't know--worried or something. What was that? It isn't her, is it?"

William sighed and didn't answer, turning his head away and staring at the mat.

Buffy turned the push into a smack. "Tell me."

"Uh, love," color flooded his cheeks, "it's just that you may need to instruct me in that particular subject…I mean…I haven't really--I mean, girls never really--"

Understanding immediately, she put a finger to his lips then ran her hand along his cheekbones and up into his tousled curls as she'd wanted to do for so long. She played with them a moment, then turned his head back to her, meeting his serious blue eyes. "Works for me," she said simply and kissed him again, fingers still entwined in his hair.

"Oh!" she said minutes later, eyes wide and alarmed again. "Not that I'm like Miss Experienced Girl or something. I mean, I've uh…well…I'm not skanky or anything. I have had boyfriends and well--but I--"

It was his turn to silence her. "Buffy," he said quietly, his voice deep and affectionate; "I knew what you meant. Fact is," his lips quirked, "if you were a nun you might have less experience than I do in this sort of thing, but as I assume you've not been considering a role in the church--"

Buffy giggled.

"It's all incredibly embarrassing," he said and buried his face in her shoulder. "I've always been very shy, as you probably know by now."

"Hey, I'm happy nobody saw the real you before now." She smiled smugly. "Their loss, my gain that they couldn't see how wonderful you are."

He raised his head and she saw that the disbelief was back. "You think I'm wonderful?"

"Well, yeah, that's why I'm lying on a gym floor kissing you."

Now the disbelief turned into something like awe. "You are, aren't you?" His head lowered again, but this time she felt soft, feather light kisses at the base of her neck and shivered.

She cupped her hand around his cheek and made him look at her again, saying, "Really. Don't worry. You're a natural at this."

Amusement lit his eyes and he turned to kiss her palm. "I think you're wonderful too."

He was astonished when this caused Buffy to burst into giggles and clutch his shirt, hiding her face. "What?" he finally asked.

"It's Dawn. She was right." Buffy regained control and sighed dramatically. "She's going to be insufferable now."

"What was Dawn right about?"

Buffy flashed him a brilliant smile. "You like me."

"Of course I do."

"Well, I didn't know that. Dawn said it the first time she met you and she's been bugging me about it ever since."

"Smart little chit, isn't she?" William grinned. "You should listen to her more often."

"Oh sure, see if you feel that way when she offers YOU a Mexican style peanut butter and salsa omelet."

His rich laugh rang out again. He has such a great laugh, Buffy thought, so warm and genuine.

William's arms tightened around her and he hauled her to a sitting position, ensconced on his lap. He rested his chin on her head and asked quietly, "What now?"

"What do you mean?" Buffy asked, frowning.

"What do you want, pet?"

"Well, I want…you know…I want to be…together and hang out and…you know!"

"You want to be my girlfriend?" he asked softly.

She rested her head on his chest and snuggled closer. "Yeah, that sounds good."

"May get some flack from your friends."

"Then they aren't really my friends, are they?" She grimaced. "I've been learning that the hard way lately."

"Okay, then, it's official." He beamed at her upturned face. "And I will personally be buying Dawn the biggest chocolate shake we can find."

Buffy laughed. "When do you get off work?"

"Not 'til 8." He saw her disappointment and added, "I'll cut back my hours if you like. Been working like a fiend to keep my mind off things and earn some money."

"I'd like that." Buffy smiled. "If you can. I've missed you."

"Well, Jenny won't take any of my money as I'd originally planned, so I'll make plenty to get by doing this part time instead of full."

Buffy reached up to peck his lips. "I'll keep your mind off things."

"I can see that you will." He pulled her up, still loosely enclosed in his arms. "Speaking of work...I'd better get back to it. Let's walk you to the bus stop and I'll call you when I get out, yeah?"

"Ok."

*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*o*

Dawn threw open her bedroom door, scowling. "What, my music too loud now? Tough. I like it and boy bands don't all suck and--" She stared at her sister's glowing face. "What?"

Buffy proffered the shoe box in her hand, smiling.

Dawn took it, shot a baffled look at Buffy, and lifted the cover. "Oh, these are gorgeous! They're perfect!" Box in one hand and lid in the other, she threw her arms around her sister. "Where did you find them? They're exactly what I wanted."

"I know," Buffy said, smugly. "It took me hours, but I finally found them."

Dawn drew back and looked puzzled. "Why'd you do that?" she frowned. "Did you want to avoid shopping with me that much?"

"Oh no!" Buffy rushed to say. "We can still go shopping this weekend if you want. It's--" she paused and mumbled, "It's a thank you."

"For what?"

"Well, Will will probably be joining us at some point Saturday. He wants to thank you with a big chocolate shake."

Dawn grinned. "Hey, for that I want ice cream too."

"Done."

Dawn narrowed her eyes thoughtfully. "So you admit that I'm the relationship queen in this house?"

Buffy rolled her eyes. "The relationship-less queen maybe. I admit nothing." She walked to the door and then turned back to Dawn. "But yeah, in this case, you were right. And well…thanks."

Dawn watched her sister's departure with a stunned look on her face. "Huh. Hell's frozen over. Wonder how they like the new weather down there?" Then she shook it off and slipped on one of her beautiful new shoes.