Save Me From Myself

Summary: On the surface Buffy Summers is your typical beautiful California girl Long blonde hair, nice tan, smiling face. However Buffy and her friends have a not so secret secret. They share a very close bond that no one can break, a bond that no one else understands. There are only three rules. One, you never say you’re sorry. Two you never lie. Three, you are always faithful to the friends.


Prologue
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Looking back, I can see how flawed we were. How naïve we were. We were young, wounded by the outside world, and to rebel we decided to shut the world out. We were always close, mind you. From the first day of school we all connected, the eight of us. That’s when there was eight of us. We were all inseparable from day one. We all stuck together through all of our parents splitting up, all of our broken hearts. We were more than friends, it was as if we were one person split into many.

It was years into our time together that things changed. When I was fifteen, Billy Fordham asked me to the spring dance. I was thrilled, the group however wasn’t as pleased. All of them were overly protective and concerned about his reputation and begged me not to go. But I was excited and convinced everything would be fine.

It wasn’t.

Oh, it started out great. He picked me up at eight in his mustang, heavy metal blasting and I was glowing. He mumbled something about my dress as I walked out alone to the car and opened the door for myself and climbed in. He drove to fast and didn’t turn the music down . We were only at the dance for about twenty minutes when he was ready to leave. He said he had other plans for the night. I was a little put off, but I was still to excited about being with a senior boy to be worried at all.

He drove me to a abandoned parking lot on the bad side of town. He didn’t ask permission, he didn’t even flinch when I scratched his cheek, or when I bit the hand he had covering my mouth. After it was over he turned the car around and drove me home, ignoring my sobbing . He sat silently as I walked up to my house, my head hung in shame.

Pressing charges was out of the question the D.A told me two days later as I sat in his office downtown. Faith, Cordelia and Anya sat on all sides of me, all three of them touching me in some way to offer comfort. The Fordhams were a very respected family in Sunnydale, and I had unintentionally destroyed all the evidence by showering.

He looked at me with kind eyes and told me that a trial would only serve to serve to prolong my suffering .
That night was the last time I have ever cried. Surrounded by my friends all of them, huddled in my bedroom, all of them squeezed onto my twin sized bed, comforting me.

Three days later I stood with Faith and watched as Billy was carried away in an ambulance. The story was that he had been jumped behind the gym. No one knew who the attackers were, just three masked guys in hoodies that seemed to be on drugs, said the witnesses. They were out of control, almost like they were possessed.

That night the girls and I sat quietly in the kitchen of Angels house and played nursemaid the cuts and bruises on Angel, Xander, Conner, and Doyle’s hands and elbows. The news said the next day that Billy was lucky to be alive. Last I heard Billy was still in a coma, his brain permanently mush. To this day no one found out who or why.

I know that was what sealed the deal for me. The rape, the justice, the sacrifice the group made for me. That’s what drove me deeper into their arms, that’s what made me take the final step. I was already there, before anything physical actually happened with the others, I was already in love with them. I belonged to them, completely.

For the others it was little things that drove them closer to the group. Cheating lovers, betrayal from other friends, rejections from the world, really horrible home lives. It all lead to the summer after we all turned sixteen.

We were all at Angels house once again, his being the biggest and most likely parent free, and laying out by the pool. It wasn’t something from a porn or anything. It didn’t start out as something sordid . We were just hanging out not swimming, not even all of us were in swimsuits, just being together.

We were talking about just random stuff when Cordelia made the announcement that made us all stop and think.

“I have come to a decision.” She said loudly, intending to draw everyone’s attention, just like always. And just like always everyone turned to her, all other conversations ceased. “I am not going to date anymore.” She said with a air of finality. Faith rolled her eyes and Anya snorted. But Cordelia wasn’t finished.

“No I’m serious, why should I. It’s pointless. Why go through the whole scene anymore. I mean it’s horrible. The nerves, the waiting, the groping, the slobbering, the strained conversation. The painful shoes, short skirts, tight tops. I’m sick of it. I hate having to put on lip gloss and expensive hair products to impress some mouth breather that thinks just because he has a nice car, he deserves a piece of ass.

Why should I keep wasting my time faking orgasms and telling some average Joe that it was good for me too while trying not to roll my eyes. Why go through the whole spill just to have a connection to someone. Why go through all of that when I really don’t need to look any further than you guys. I mean really, what can I get from some jock strap that I can’t get from this group. I mean, it’s pointless.” Cordelia finished with a sigh, flopping down onto the lounge chair beside her.

Anya raised her hand, when we looked at her, curious she coughed and looked a bit nervous. “Um, sex?” She said, her face a little pale. It threw us off, Anya was never nervous. “I, I, mean that’s what you don’t get from the group that you do from those miserable dates.”

We all looked to each other with curious eyes.

Two hours later and a few stolen bottles of beer and we had a new connection. Sex. But it wasn’t just the sex. It was all different. We were now lovers, together. We talked long into the night, out on the pool deck, the stars above us. We complied a list of rules, a list that was narrowed down to three. Number one, you never say you’re sorry in the group. Number two, you never lie to the group and finally number three, you always remain faithful to the group.

We all stuck together like that for two years. Then Xander and Anya left us. They broke our hearts, saying they wanted out, that they were in love yes, but not with the group anymore, but with each other. Cordelia demanded they be cut off completely, never spoken to again, erased.

You don’t leave the group, you are the group. That’s how it worked. We all knew it. We lived by it. Then the world can crashing down around us when a new family moved in next door to me. A new family with a horribly dangerous son with piercing blue eyes and magic hands.


~TBC~

Save Me From Myself




~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Looking back, now that I’m older and wiser I see my mistakes. All of our mistakes. We all thought we were so fucking smart. Thought that we had the world beat, that we had figured it all out. We looked around at everyone, their simple little relationships and mocked them. We thought we were better than them, those who still played the dating game were beneath us. We gagged as single couples walked down the halls holding hands, sappy smiles on their faces. We rolled our eyes at girls putting on pounds of makeup on in the bathrooms. We had it all worked out, our own little system, our own world. We were so naive to believe the world wouldn’t bring it down.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

( BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BE-- )

Groaning loudly Buffy rolled over, slamming her hand down on the evil screeching box of doom. She spun around in bed, the sheets twisting around her limbs making her resemble a mummy and she flopped onto her back. Sighing she stretched and started to untangle herself and climb out of bed and as if on cue she grabbed the phone off the charger before it even finished it’s first ring.

“Up?” A sleep roughened female voice questioned.

Stepping into the hall bathroom Buffy flipped on the light and reached for her tooth brush while answering with a simple “Yep.”

“See ya on the curb in thirty.” The girl said, her voice still hazy.

“Got it, loves.” Buffy answered, her speech muffled by the tooth brush in her mouth.

“Loves.” Answered the girl and then Buffy through the phone onto the hamper in the corner, stepping into the shower.

Exactly thirty minutes later Buffy stepped off the curb in front of her house and into the black X-Terra that had just pulled up with two other girls inside. She slid into her seat, planting a chaste kiss on each of the girls mouths, smiling in greeting. She settled into her seat just as Faith’s arms wrapped around her shoulders from the backseat .

“So, how many college choices in common again?” Faith asked the girls. Cordy and Buffy both looked at her smirking face in the rearview as Cordy pulled away from the curb and onto the empty street.

“Last I checked, five out of seven.” Said the brunette, look to Buffy to confirm.

Buffy nodded, adjusting the radio station . “Last I heard, yeah. Why?” She asked, absentmindedly. She leaned over and began adjusting the radio dials, looking for something decent to listen to.

Faith shook her head from the backseat “Just wondering is all.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ten minutes later the X-Terra pulled into a spot in the student lot and the girls piled out. Walking down two spots to stand behind a bronze Land Rover as Angel, Conner and Doyle spilled out coming the surround them. The group spent several minutes greeting each other with laughter filled kisses and playful hugging, ignoring the students passing by.

Finally they started towards the school, all six of them paired up. Cordy arm and arm with Angel, Faith riding piggyback on Doyle. Buffy and Conner lagged behind them, her walking with her head on his shoulder.

Being the first day of the new semester they all swapped schedules as they walked, looking to see what classes they all shared. This ritual was pointless, of course. The group had been sharing the same classes for years. That was the advantage of all of them being top students. Conner being a assistant in the attendance office didn’t hurt their chances either.

After examining the new schedules however the discovered that they would be splitting for first and second periods. Not completely, but Buffy and Conner were in both in first period phys ed while the others were stuck in health. With hugs and cheek kisses they split up and headed towards their classes.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In a small Southern California town new neighbors were kind of a big deal. So when one Tuesday afternoon a moving truck pulled up to the curb beside Buffy’s house it caused quite a stir. Joyce Summers were baking like mad, wanting to have plenty of baked goods to welcome the new family and Dawn was constantly staring out the windows, hoping to catch a glance of any cute boys to flirt with or girls to play with.

The group were truly the only oblivious ones. So involved in one another they really didn’t see the point in obsessing over anyone new to the area. That was, until about a week after the moving trucks disappeared. Buffy, Cordy and Faith had just pilled out of Cordy’s SUV and were laughing at something pointless when Buffy was almost knocked to the ground from a free flying basketball. The girls looked around, shocked as a the ball rolled away and into the empty street.

“Bollocks, sorry loves, is anyone hurt?”

The girls stood, stunned as a stunning young man came running up. He was young, about their age, maybe older and just about the most beautiful thing Buffy had ever seen. He was tall, not overly so, and lean, but in a very nice way, he had the body of a swimmer. The most interesting thing about him however was his stark white hair. He stood before them, shirtless in black gym shorts, a look of genuine concern on his face. Buffy was close to drooling, that accent was something. She quickly jerked herself out of it however, when as usual Cordelia spoke up first.

“Yea, we’re fine, no thanks to you. Watch where you toss that thing. God, do people not walk freely in what ever country you’re from?” She snapped in her best, ‘I’m rich, and you’re beneath me‘, tone. With that they left him standing there as they walked quickly across the yard. Buffy tried not to notice that he was still looking at her as they walked into the house and closed the door.

“God, what was that thing?” Cordelia asked the other girls with disgust. “Did you see that hair? Damn I am so glad I don’t have to rely on the outside world for sex anymore.” She looked genuinely pained as she walked over to the fridge and grabbed all three girls a water and slammed the door shut. Faith and Buffy exchanged a look at Cordy’s extreme behavior. But the just shrugged and took the bottles following the irate girl into the living room to wait for the guys.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I look back on those moments as the final ones before our carefully constructed world started to fall down around us. We were so clueless.

~TBC~