Title: Green Eyed Christmas
Author: Pattyanne

AN: This takes place shortly after
their first time together in the
crumbling house. I've changed
the time line to place it closer to
Christmas. Also, I'm not dealing
with any 'Willow' issues, or 'Dawn'
issues. I have enough trouble sorting
out Spike and Buffy's problems without
getting into the two of them. So, the only
'issue' that will be addressed here is
Buffy's continual refusal to see sense.

Also, I brought Oz back for Willow.
Nothing against Tara, I just like him.


Part 1.....


Buffy wrapped her sweater tighter around her
as she crossed the street without waiting for the
signal. She picked up her pace a little, but Spike
stayed right on her heels.

"You gonna run from this for the rest of your life,
Slayer?"

"I'm not running from anything," she replied irritably.
"Least of all you."

"Oh, like hell you're not," he said. "You think that if
you turn your back on me and walk really fast you can
forget that night ever happened." He sped up, until
he was in front of her, then turned to face her. "Well, guess
what, cupcake? It happened. Five bloody times."

Forced to stop, Buffy glared at him. "Will you lower
your voice?" she hissed.

"No! I fucking will not! I don't give a rat's ass who hears
me." Contrary to his words, he did modify his tone. "Why
do you keep doing this? Why do you constantly push me
away?"

Buffy took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. "Look...I
don't know what you want me to say. Yes, it happened. But
it's over...and it won't happen again. Ever!"

Spike grabbed her shoulders and shook her a little. "Don't
you say it like that!" he said through clenched teeth. "Don't
treat it like some kind of ten dollar trick you bought to get
your itch scratched."

She yanked out of his hold and and began to walk away
again. When she realized that he wasn't following her, she
stopped and turned around, uncertain of what to do.

He was about ten feet away, and the look on his face almost
made her go back. He looked....hurt.

"Spike..." she began, then let her words trail off, not knowing
what to say.

"Don't," he told her, his voice husky with an emotion she'd not
heard from him before. "Please...don't tell me again how mean-
ingless it was to you."

He looked slightly glassy eyed, and for an instant Buffy was
afraid he might cry. The thought wrenched at her heart for
a moment, before she beat it into submission.

As she watched, Spike collected himself. Furtively passing
his hand across his eyes, he looked at her.

He didn't look angry anymore. He looked sad...and re-
signed.

His voice was quiet and even tempered. "You go ahead
and remember it the way you want to. Tell yourself
whatever you need to hear about it being degrading and
nasty, and," he swallowed hard, "beneath you."

Shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he
approached her slowly. "But if it's all the same to you, I'm
gonna remember it the way it really was. I'll remember how
good you felt, how soft and warm. The way you whispered
in my ear."

Buffy stared at him, seemingly hypnotized by his words.

"The feel of your skin," he went on. "The scent of your
hair...your hands on me...the taste of your lips."

He stopped two feet away from where she stood rooted
to the ground. "I was there, too. We were a lot of things
that night, but perverse wasn't one of them."

Sighing deeply, the pain in his voice was almost tan-
gible. "I've done everything I can think of to make you see
that I've changed. But," he added ruefully, "I can't change
the past. It all happened...and I can't pretend it didn't. I
became a vampire and I killed people, and no amount of
wishing on a star will make my past disappear. No more
than Angel getting his soul back made HIS past disappear."

He let out a harsh laugh. "You know...some of the things
he did make me look like a rank amateur. But all is
forgiven...because now he feels really bad about it."

"Angel didn't..."

He cut her off. "Angel changed when he got his soul
back, and you believed in him. I've changed MYSELF...but
you can't bring yourself to believe in me." He leaned in
closer, looking her in the eye. "His soul was his sal-
vation. You were mine," he said simply.

"Spike..."

"I love you, Buffy. You can believe it or not, I don't care. But
it's the truth." He turned his head to whisper in her ear. "And
that night we had together only makes me love you more. The
way you were...the things you did with me...that soft little moan
you make right before you..."

"Stop it," she said, pushing him away. She turned around again
and walked off. "Will you please just leave me alone?"

"Yes," he replied. "I will. If you really want me to, I will leave
you alone. Entirely."

Buffy was more than a little surprised to hear this. He looked
and sounded very sincere, and it confused her. "Well...good.
Because that's what I want."

"Then that's what you shall have," he assured her. "But you
remember one thing. No one will ever love you the way I do. As
MUCH as I do." Shaking his head, he gave her a smile. "So
long, Slayer," he said with a small wave. "It's been a real slice."

Turning around, he disappeared into the darkness of the
cemetery.

And Buffy watched him go.


TBC...
Feedback is welcome

Title: Green Eyed Christmas
Author: Pattyanne
snapkik@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: None of the BtVS
characters belong to me.
Feedback: Love some, thanks.
Summary: Takes place shortly after
the events of 'Wrecked', however I
have moved the action close to Christmas.
Also, I'm not getting into 'Dawn' problems
or 'Willow' problems. It's hard enough
ironing out Buffy and Spike's problems,
without getting involved with the two
of them, so no issues will be addressed
here, other than the obvious one of Buffy's
unending refusal to see sense.

Oh, and Oz is still with Willow. Hope that's
okay.




Part two.....



TEN DAYS LATER


"I have no idea what to give Giles for Christmas,"
Buffy moaned. "Help me."

Willow smiled and shrugged. "I can't help you," she
said. "Who'll help me?"

"Okay, then...what about you?" Buffy asked, turning
to Xander. "Got any thoughts that don't involve a
subscription to a men's magazine?"

"Gee, Buff...I don't know," he replied. "It's not like you
know him all that well. I mean...what's it been? Only
three years. You can't be expected to know what he's
interested in. Why don't you...."

"Oh, shut up," she said, wadding up a paper napkin
and throwing it at him.

"Let's go shopping tomorrow," Willow suggested. "We'll
spend the whole day at the mall. It'll be fun. We can eat
our way through the food court."

"No, thanks," Xander said, shuddering. "I've been
through that before."

"And just what is THAT supposed to mean?" Buffy
asked, narrowing her eyes.

"It means that I went Christmas shopping with you
two last year. It was the most horrifying experience
of my life." He looked at Oz for support. "I'm just now
recovering from it."

"I find that hard to believe," Oz said.

"Thank you," Willow interjected, kissing his cheek.

"I went shopping with them TWO years ago and I'm
nowhere near recovering from it," he added.

"Do all men hate to shop?" Buffy asked, then turned
a doubtful gaze of Willow.

"What are you asking her for?" Xander spoke up. "She's
not qualified to answer that question."

"All right," Buffy replied, taking a sip of her drink. "You
tell me why all men shun the marketplace."

"Elementary, my dear slayer," he answered, finishing
his beer. "It's encoded into our DNA, stretching all
the way back to the time of the cave men."

Buffy grinned. "Do tell."

"It started the first time primitive man turned to his
primitive babe and said 'Me man of cave. Man don't
shop present! Now get food!' and then....."

Buffy interrupted him. "If man don't shop present,"
she said sweetly, "then man don't get one either."

"On the OTHER hand," he tacked on quickly, "men
have made a lot of progress since those days. We
don't club you over the head and drag you to our
caves...we don't play with fire...and when we see a
dinosaur, we run away from it. We don't try and kill
it with rocks and a slingshot."

"So...you'll help shop?" Buffy asked.

He swallowed hard. "I'll...I'll...." He struggled to force
the words out. "I'll....ssshhhhooopppp." Looking at Oz
again he said, "The things I'll do for new socks."

Sitting back in her chair, Buffy finished her drink and
looked around. "Do you see our...."

"Spike." Xander yelped.

"...waitress?" She frowned. "Why did you say..."

"Spike!" Willow, this time.

Buffy was confused. "What are you talking about? Why
do you keep saying that?"

Her heart rate increased. They couldn't know. No way
could they know. She glanced around the Bronze.

"He's over at the bar," Willow said.

"Talking to a girl," Oz added.

"Yeah," Xander chimed in. "Wow....that IS a girl! What
a girl!"

Buffy's head spun so quickly that her neck popped. Rub-
bing it, she scanned the crowd at the bar.

Her eyes found their target, and she could see right
away that Xander hadn't been overstating. That was
definitely a "Wow" type of girl, and she made Buffy feel
completely inadequate.

For one thing, she was taller. Just about eye level with
Spike. Long legs, and a wealth of dark brown curls that
flowed to her waist. The girl turned away from the
bar, and the side view gave them all a good look at
her other...endowments.

"Gee," Willow sounded wistful. "She got her share and
mine too."

"Do..." Buffy cleared her throat. "Do you know who she
is?"

"I've never seen her before." Willow reached for Oz's
hand, and he gave it, giving her fingers a gentle squeeze.

"Vamp?" Buffy mused. **Can I kill her?**

"I doubt it," Xander said. "She's got a pretty good tan
working for her."

"I suppose." Buffy turned back to the table, looking at
Xander in irritation. "Oh, for god's sake, Xander. Stop
staring like that before you have an accident!" she
snapped.

Willow placed one finger beneath her childhood friend's
chin, and closed it with a loud 'click'. "I wonder if she
came here with him?"

"Hey!" Xander whined. "That wath mah ton!"

"That'll teach you to keep it in your mouth," Buffy said,
with a nasty smile.

Seeing he could expect no sympathy from the slayer,
he turned to Willow. "Thit...thith hurth." He stuck out
his tongue. "Ahh I beeing?"

Willow examined the injury. "Not in a life threatening
way."

"Quit being such a baby," Buffy added. She tried not
to stare at Spike and his companion, but her eyes kept
turning to them again and again.

"Somebody should probably warn her about Spike," she
said, getting to her feet.

"How come?" Willow asked. 'It's not like he can bite her
or anything."

Buffy sat back down. "I guess not." The she jumped right
back up. "Where's that waitress, anyway?"

"She's right over...."

"You know what?" Buffy cut in. "Never mind. I'll just go
and get it myself. You guys want another?"

"Nope."

"I'm fine."

"Ah fie ooh."

"Be right back." Buffy nudged her way through the crowd,
not being particularly polite about it.

She stood at the bar, just a few feet from where Spike
and Wonder Girl stood, deliberately not noticing them. She
ordered a coke, then turned to go and sit down.

"Hello, Buffy," Spike said, with a perfectly friendly grin
on his good looking face.

Buffy gave him a surprised look. "Oh, hi! I didn't notice
you there."

"How've you been?"

"Great...just great," she replied, sipping her coke. "You?"

"The same." Spike placed his hand on his date's waist. "This
is Melinda. Melinda, this is Buffy Summers."

The girls exchanged weak hellos, then an awkward
silence.

Buffy was the first one to speak. "It sure was a nice day
today, wasn't it? Nice and sunny." She looked at Spike.
"Didn't you think so?"

"Well, I wasn't really outside much today," he replied.

"Mmm..that's a shame. Because it was a really nice
day. Very nice. Good day to be outside." She turned to
Melinda. "How about you, Melinda? You like being outside
a lot? Fresh air? Sunshine? I guess you probably do...you've
got such a nice tan."

"Actually," the brunette replied. "I work at night, so I
sleep most of the day."

Buffy's grin widened. "Is that a fact?"

"Yes. I wear a bronzing lotion."

**I knew it! Works at night...sleeps all day...gets
her tan out of a bottle...vamp!**


"Melinda is a nurse," Spike interjected, his hand
rubbing small circles on the girl's back. "She works
in the children's ward of Mercy Hospital."

Buffy's balloon began to deflate. "Really? Well...that's
just...that must be very...rewarding for you." She
looked away when Spike slid his arm around Melinda's
waist.

"It is," the girl agreed. "I love children."

"She's great with kids," Spike added. "Tell Buffy what
you did today, luv."

Melinda beamed, showing every one of her perfectly
white and even teeth. "Some of the other nurses and
I took some of the children from the homeless shelter
to the park for the day."

Buffy's balloon popped. Lots of sunlight at the park.

"Isn't she something?" Spike asked, tightening his
arm around Melinda.

"Boy, I'll say," Buffy replied, forcing enthusiasm. "So,
where did you two meet?"

"Oh, you'll probably think it's really weird," Melinda
began.

"Try me."

"Well...we met in a cemetery!" The girl giggled in a way
Buffy found extremely annoying. "I stopped there on my
way to work to put flowers on my grandmother's grave,
and...there he was."

"There he was," Buffy echoed. "In a cemetery." She looked
at Spike. "Were you putting flowers on your grandmother's
grave, too?"

"No," he said. "No, I wasn't."

"Why were you there?" she asked. "You got a thing for
cemeteries?" **Tell the TRUTH, you big jerk!**

"Just paying my respects to a few old mates."

That damn smirk was back on his face.

"At night?"

"Yeah. At night."

"Why?"

Spike shrugged. "Oh, you know how it is, Buffy. Sometimes
there just aren't enough hours in the day to do everything." He
stroked Melinda's hair. "Lucky break for me. If I'd gone during
the day, I never would have met this beautiful woman."

"Sppiike," Melinda said, punching him playfully on the
shoulder and blushing.

"Well. you ARE beautiful. Can't help saying it." He
grinned wolfishly, squeezing her in a gesture of deep
affection.

Melinda gave him a tender smile. "You're so sweet." To
Buffy, "Isn't he sweet?"

"Sweet," Buffy said, with a sickening smile of her own. "You
have no idea." She turned her smile on Spike. "So...heard
from Drusilla lately?"

His eyes narrowed. "No. Not for some time now."

"I was just wondering how she's doing these days."

**HA!**

"I'm sure she's just fine," he assured her.

"I'll bet she really misses you." Buffy turned to Melinda. "Spike
and Drusilla were absolutely inseparable for ages. I mean, the
two of them were..."

"Buffy!" Spike interrupted.

She stopped short. "Ohh! Oh, that's right. They were...very
close friends! Just friends," she said, with an "oops, me and
my big mouth" tone in her voice.

"Oh...um, that's nice," Melinda said, her smile finally
beginning to falter. "So, Buffy...what do you do?"

"I'm a vam..."

"You know, we have to be going," Spike cut her off again
in the middle of her reply.

"Must you?" Buffy asked sweetly. "Melinda and I were just
getting to know each other." She patted the other girl's arm
and stage whispered, "I think Spike's afraid that I might tell
you all his little secrets." She gave Melinda a conspiratorial
nudge. "Men! So insecure."

Melinda brought back her blinding smile. "Well, it was
certainly nice meeting you, Buffy."

"Likewise," Buffy chirped. "An absolute pleasure. Maybe we'll
see each other again sometime."

"I'd like..." was all Melinda could get out before Spike pulled
on her hand, heading for the door.

Buffy smiled and waved. "Melinda! You keep an eye on him,
you hear? He can be a real handful sometimes. A perfect
devil!"

She watched as they reached the door, half expecting Spike
to turn around and look at her. But, he walked out without a
backward glance, dragging Melinda with him.

Taking a deep breath, she composed her unsettled feelings
and returned to her friends.

Xander was the first to speak. "Well, THAT was certainly
an interesting little scene."

Buffy finished her coke in one long swallow. "I see your
tongue is functioning again."

"So, did you find out who she is?" Willow asked curiously.

"Just some bimbo he picked up in a cemetery. Claims she's
a nurse or something." Buffy shrugged dismissively, as
though nothing mattered at all. "You know, up close," she
added, "she's not all that good looking."




TBC.....

Come on now...let me know how it's going.

Green Eyed Christmas
Part 3




~~~~~~~~~~
"I'll have a blue Christmas
without you
I'll be so blue thinking
about you.."
~~~~~~~~~~



Three days later, Buffy spotted Melinda and Spike
together at the Sunnydale Mall. They looked to be
Christmas shopping, although Spike was the one
carrying all the packages.

She followed behind them at a sensible distance,
not wanting Spike to 'sense' her presence, as he
claimed he always could.

Watching them weave in and out amongst the crowds
of holiday shoppers gave Buffy a slightly sick feeling
that she couldn't explain.

She was being ridiculous, she scolded herself. It's
wasn't as though she cared who Spike consorted with.
If he wanted to be seen with tacky ex-cheerleader type
looking females, that was his business. As long as he
was leaving HER alone, Buffy's little boat sailed serene.

"Oh, that figures," she muttered, watching them walk
into a lingerie store. Not even a classy one like Victoria's
Secret. This was one of those places that specialized
in leopard skin prints and marabou feathers all over
everything. Sequined pasties and edible underpants
were the special deal of the day, or so the sign in the
window proclaimed.

Hiding behind a potted poinsettia bush, Buffy observed
Melinda pick up what looked like a sexy elf costume
from one of the racks. She held it up to herself and turned
to say something to Spike, obviously soliciting his opinion.

Buffy could almost hear him praise the trashy looking
ensemble. He'd be wearing that patented smirk he'd
perfected over the years, one eyebrow would arch slightly
and he'd say something like, "You're filling my stocking
up already, luv."

Disgusting. She was well rid of him and his sexy little
remarks...and admiring glances. His heart in his eyes,
and the gentleness he displayed whenever she was
upset. The way he'd touched her during that long, wildly
passionate night together...whispering in her ear...telling
her he loved her...that he would always love her and no one
else.

Well. So much for undying love.

That annoying laugh of Melinda's disrupted her thoughts,
and she looked up just in time to see Spike smiling at the
girl...and leaning closer...and closer....

"Whatcha doing?"

Buffy nearly jumped out of her suede boots when Willow
tapped her on the shoulder. She spun around quickly,
her packages smacking her friend in the side.

"Whoa, slow down," Willow laughed. She glanced around
Buffy and said, "You're not planning on buying something
in there are you?"

Flustered, Buffy shook her head and bent down to pick
up the bag she'd clobbered Willow with. "In there? Get
real," she laughed, a little too loudly. "Like I'd be seen
dead in that place."

Spike and Melinda were heading for the front of the
store, and Buffy wasn't about to be caught spying by
him. She took Willow's arm and began dragging her in
the direction of the food court. "Come on," she said
brightly. "Let's get some hot chocolate and one of those
big cinnamon buns. My treat."

She had a sudden unexplainable need for comfort food.


~~~~~~~~~~
"Decorations of red
On a green Christmas tree
Won't mean a thing
If you're not here with me.."
~~~~~~~~~~



Buffy shivered when she walked into the house. It was dark and cold and empty, and she was immediately conscious
of the bleak feeling she'd been fighting off ever since she'd
run across Spike and his new girlfriend.

She dumped her packages on the sofa and turned up the
thermostat, hoping to dispel the damp chill of the weather
from both her house and her heart.

There was a note from Dawn on the coffee table. She'd
been invited to a friends house for the night and would be
home late tomorrow afternoon. Buffy grabbed the phone and
made a quick call, confirming this information. After speaking
with Holly Westcott's mother and being assured that the two
girls wouldn't be going anywhere that night, she had spoken
to Dawn and instructed her to come straight home the following
day.

After that, there wasn't much else to do. She wandered aim-
lessly around the house, cleaning up a few things here and
there. Started a load of laundry and washed the breakfast
dishes. Opened the mail and stuck the Christmas cards in
the slats of the blinds.

Hoping for a little holiday cheer, she plugged in the lights on
the tree and sat beneath it wrapping a few gifts.

She wrapped, labeled and set gifts for Xander, Willow, and
Oz beneath the tree, then reached for the last bag and
extracted it's contents; a silky shirt the color of the
Mediterranean Sea that she'd bought, figuring
that Dawn would want to have something for Spike.

** He'd better damn well appreciate it after I spent
so much time looking for something this color..**

Buffy folded the garment neatly, setting it in a shirt
box and covering it with a thin slice of blue tissue
paper.

When it too was wrapped and sporting a decorative
bow, she peeled off another label and stuck it on
the box, then wrote 'To Spike from Buffy'. She
was about to place it under the tree when she
caught herself. Placing another label on top of the
first one, she addressed it properly this time.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I'll have a blue Christmas
that's certain
And when that blue heartache
starts hurtin'..."
~~~~~~~~~~


The following morning she was up early. After
showering, she went downstairs to have break-
fast.

She made herself a cup of tea and ate a bowl
of cereal, then went back to her room and made her
bed. When that chore was finished, there wasn't
much left for her to do, so she puttered around the
house all day until Dawn finally came home.

Buffy practically jumped on her sister when she
came through the door. "Hi!" she said, a little too
cheerfully. "Did you have fun last night?"

Dawn dropped her overnight bag on and the floor
and headed for the stairs, with Buffy right on her
heels.

"Yeah, I had fun" Dawn said when it became obvious
that Buffy was expecting an answer. "I'll tell you
about it later, okay?" She stripped off her jeans
and sweater, then redressed in a black skirt and
a cherry red blouse.

Buffy frowned as she observed her sister changing
and fixing her make up. "Are you going out again?"
she asked, hating the prospect of spending the
evening alone with no one to talk with.

"Just for a little while," Dawn replied as she brushed
her hair. "I'm meeting Spike at the China Palace."

This nugget of information truly surprised Buffy. "You
mean for dinner? You're meeting Spike to have dinner
with him?"

When had THAT sort of thing started happening?

"Uh-huh." Dawn pulled on her leather jacket. "He
wants me to meet this girl he's been seeing. I think
he really likes her, but he says he wants my approval
before it gets serious."

** Oh! So, it's...not serious yet?**

Buffy refused to analyze what malfunction in her brain
was responsible for THAT thought.

"Well..." she said lamely. "Don't be out too late,
okay?"

Something in her tone made Dawn stop and turn
around. "Did you...want to come along?" she asked
hesitantly. "I'm sure Spike won't mind."

Buffy shook her head. "Oh, no. No thanks. I
have...stuff I need to do. Lots of...you know..."

"Stuff," Dawn provided. "Okay, well..why don't
you call Xander or Willow? They could come over
and help you with your...whatever stuff you need
to do."

"Yeah," Buffy said, nodding in a short, jerky way. "I
might do that. You go ahead and go. I'll be fine."

"You sure?"

"Totally. Go. Have fun."


~~~~~~~~~~
"You'll be doing all right
With your Christmas of white.."
~~~~~~~~~~


She called both Willow and Xander, who both had
previous plans for the evening, and who both invited
her to come along with them.

Buffy declined their invitations, not wanting to be the
third party in what had been planned for only two.

She hung up the phone in the kitchen, then wandered
back into the living room.

Sinking down onto the sofa, she sat and studied the
colorful glow of the tree lights, which for some reason
made her feel melancholy and alone.

Entirely...alone.


~~~~~~~~~~
"But I'll have a blue, blue Christmas.."
~~~~~~~~~~

TBC....
(I guess being alone isn't all it's cracked up
to be)

Green Eyed Christmas
Part 4



~~~~~~~~~~
"Greeting cards have all been sent
The Christmas rush is through
But I still have one wish to make
A special one for you..."
~~~~~~~~~~



Clutching the gaily wrapped present in one
clammy hand, Buffy silently vowed never to fall
asleep again watching "It's A Wonderful Life".

A classic holiday tale it just might be, but it also
had a tendency to bring on strange dreams...or
maybe clear a person's cluttered and confused mind,
she couldn't decide.

Whichever it was, she had woken up with tears on
her face and the butterflies-in-the-tummy fear that
perhaps...just perhaps...she'd made the biggest mistake
of her own, not-so-wonderful life.

Now, with one hand on the gift as the other smoothed
her hair nervously, she stepped inside the Bronze and
looked around the room for Spike.

When Willow had called to invite her out, she had
mentioned in the most casual of tones that Spike was
already there with Melinda. Buffy had done her best to
sound just as casual when she'd agreed to drop by for
a while, but Willow was good at picking unspoken meaning
out of a person's voice, and she probably hadn't been
fooled.

Stationing herself by the bar, she watched Spike and
Melinda out of the corner of her eye. They weren't being
particularly intimate with each other, just sitting and
talking really, but they looked so comfortable together.
How could she interfere with that, when she had been
the one to tell Spike to leave her alone and move on?

**But I was wrong! It was a huge, horrible, awful mis-
take, and I'm sorry I ever said it! I was stupid and
stubborn...and I'm sorry. Spike....I'm sorry.**

She stood there, watching them talk and laugh, until
she was afraid she might actually be sick.

**How do I fix this?**


~~~~~~~~~~
"Merry Christmas, darling
We're apart, that's true
But I can dream, and in my dreams
I'm Christmas-ing with you..."
~~~~~~~~~~


"Buffy! Merry Christmas eve!"

She turned and saw Xander standing next to her,
holding a piece of raggedy mistletoe over her head.

"Hi," she said, as brightly as she could manage. "Um..Merry
Christmas eve to you, too." She tilted her face and allowed
him to kiss her cheek.

He made a teasing grab at the gift in her hand. "For me?
I thought we weren't exchanging gifts until tomorrow night."

Buffy sighed. She just wasn't in the mood for Xander's
clown act at the moment. "No, it's for...for someone else."

"Well, come and sit with us," he said, reaching for her
hand.

She took a step back. "Later...I will. You go on back. I
need to talk to someone."

It took her another minute and a half to get him on his
way, and when she finally did, she looked over and saw
that Spike was alone at the table.

He didn't look as cheerful as he had when Melinda had
been sitting there with him. That was a bad sign. In
fact, he was staring rather morosely into a glass of some
dark, nasty looking ale.

**What are you thinking about? Do you miss me...or
do you miss HER? Spike....help me. I don't know what to
do...what to say.**

Well, standing here wasn't going to accomplish anything. If
she did it much longer, Xander would come looking for her
again, and she just couldn't handle that right now.

Taking a deep breath, she made her way slowly across
the crowded room.


~~~~~~~~~~
"Holidays are joyful
There's always something new
But everyday's a holiday
When I'm close to you.."
~~~~~~~~~~


"Hi," she said, feeling ridiculously shy.

Spike glanced up, and she was surprised to see a
brief flash of surprise and happiness in his eyes.

But he shuttered it all too quickly, and his face composed
itself into a mildly friendly expression. "Buffy. Merry Christmas."

"Um...yeah. Merry Christmas." Her eyes wandered around
the room, checking for the approach of any of her friends,
or his date. "Can I talk to you?"

His eyes narrowed slightly. "I suppose so," he said,
nudging out a chair for her. "Want something to drink?"

Buffy had no doubt that if she tried to pick up a glass
of anything, she'd end up with it all over her dress, so she
shook her head.

"Um...I was wondering if...if..." She couldn't come up with
the right words to say, and why should he believe her even
if she did? Why should he believe anything she said?

"Wondering what?" he prompted.

**Oh, God....just say it. Don't be such a coward. Just
open your mouth and say it. You didn't have any
trouble being mean to him...just say it...**

"I...I wanted to apologize to you," she said softly. "For
the way we...I...left things last time. I'm sorry...and I
hoped that...well, that we could...could try to.." She stopped
and swallowed hard, trying to dislodge a painful lump in
her throat.

He wasn't having any trouble understanding what she was
trying to articulate, and he had every right to laugh in her
face, to say that he had told her so, that he had been
right all along...and she wouldn't have minded if he did. She
deserved it, and she could take it...as long as he let her
back in afterwards.

But instead, his face remained quite serious, his voice
quiet. He looked down at the table and shook his head.
"No, Buffy. No."


~~~~~~~~~~
"The lights on the tree
I wish you could see
I wish it every day

Logs on the fire, fill me with desire
To see you...and to say..."
~~~~~~~~~~


Somewhere inside of her, Buffy hadn't actually believed
he would turn her down.

Like a child, she'd been confident that she would get
her way with him. And, like a child, she couldn't accept
his rejection.

"Spike," she said earnestly, "I know that...that I was
wrong to say what I did. I just...I didn't think before I
spoke, but I know now what I feel. I've felt it for a long time,
but I couldn't...I wouldn't...admit it, even to myself."

She placed the package down on the table and reached
for his hand.

"The night we spent together...Spike, it wasn't mean-
ingless to me. It was wonderful...so wonderful that I think
I was afraid to feel it. Wonderful has never lasted for me
before...and I...I was afraid of losing it again...knowing how
much it would hurt. I convinced myself that...that I didn't
care...because I was scared not to."

He sighed deeply, glancing away for a moment.

"But I DO care," she went on, too frightened to stop until
she was sure he believed. "Spike...I love you."

"Buffy," he pulled away from her, shaking his head. "Don't
do this. Please...."

Tears shimmered in her eyes. "I mean it. I love you. I do.
And...and I know you still love me. You're...you're not a
man who would just stop loving someone. I know you...I
know your heart. I know the way you love."

Sitting back in his chair, he looked into her eyes. "Buffy...of
course I still love you. But it's not enough. Not anymore." He
sighed again. "I'm tired of it, Buffy. Tired of trying so damn
hard...for nothing."

"But...but it wouldn't...." she began, wanting to tell him that
it wouldn't be for nothing. If they could just start again...they
could have everything.

Spike stopped her by raising one hand. "No. Just stop. You're
upset and acting like this for the wrong reasons. Because of
Melinda."

Buffy shook her head, no. "You don't love her. I know you don't."

"I never said I did," he replied. "Not to you...or to her."

"Then why..."

"Because...I want to forget."

Her heart nearly stopped beating. "Forget...me?"

He was silent for a few seconds, then nodded. "Yes. Forget
you."


~~~~~~~~~~
"That I wish you Merry Christmas
Happy New Year, too..."
~~~~~~~~~~


"Oh." Her voice was so soft that it was barely audible. "I
see." The tears in her eyes spilled over and traced slow
paths down her cheeks. Wiping them away with the back
of her hand, she tried to collect her thoughts, but all she
could hear were the words 'Forget you' echoing in her head.
"Okay. I...I'm sorry that I...that I bothered you. I'll just..." Her
eyes blind with fresh tears, she lurched to her feet and almost
stumbled.

Spike stood up and held out one hand to keep her from
falling. "Buffy..."

**No. No. If he touches me...I'll scream...I'll die.**

"I have to go," she stammered. Backing away, her eyes
darted around the room, and she saw Melinda coming out
of the ladies lounge. "I have to go home. I just....I have to
go now."

Turning on one heel, she ran out as best she could
through the crowd of happy people surrounding her.

She actually made it out the door and halfway across
the parking lot before she began to really cry.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I've just one wish
This Christmas eve
I wish I were with you.."
~~~~~~~~~~


Back inside the Bronze, Spike picked up the package
Buffy had left behind.

The label on it read, "For Spike, from Buffy. With all my love."

"Who's that from?"

He turned to see Melinda standing beside him, smiling
curiously.

Meeting her gaze with his, he couldn't think what to
say.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I've just one wish
This Christmas Eve
I wish I were with you..."
~~~~~~~~~~


TBC.....

Green Eyed Christmas

Part five....




Three hours crawled by. Buffy sat in the living room, staring
hypnotically at the twinkly lights of the Christmas tree.

She had run all the way home, trying to outdistance the hurt
that was threatening to overwhelm her. It hadn't done a bit of
good. When she'd stopped and turned around, all the pain of
her missed chances was still there, taunting her, waiting to
pounce.

At first, she'd been so upset that she hadn't been able to get
the front door unlocked. After dropping her keys three times,
she'd had to sit down on the porch swing and place her head
between her knees, fighting off a wave of nausea.

Five minutes later, she'd taken another shot at the door, and
had been successful.

Stumbling into the foyer, she'd come face to face with a note
that Dawn had taped to the mirror. She'd been invited to a last
minute caroling and tree trimming party at her friend Petra's house.
Petra's mother had come to pick her up, and Dawn had written
the address and phone number at the bottom of the page.

Forcing her voice to remain calm, Buffy called and spoke with
both her sister and Petra's mother, a jolly and chirpy sounding
woman with the strangely suitable first name of 'Tippy'.

With no one else in the house to occupy her thoughts, Buffy
had wandered around like a lost child.

She'd changed into her pajamas...while thinking about Spike.

She'd watered the tree and plugged in the lights....while
thinking about Spike.

She'd loaded the dishwasher, and wiped the peanut butter
off the kitchen counters....still thinking about Spike.

When there was nothing more to be done, she returned to
the living room and collapsed onto the sofa like a dying swan...and
promptly began to think about Spike.

Knowing that the whole mess was all her own fault didn't
lessen the pain of it one iota. She wanted to cry...to scream...to
stamp her foot; all useless gestures that hadn't even worked
when she'd been a child and such things had been expected of
her.

Until now...now that it was really starting to set in...Buffy
hadn't actually known that such pain was even possible. It made
the pain she'd suffered at the loss of Riley seem like a paper
cut in comparison to an amputation with no anesthetic or bullet
to bite down on.

How the hell she was going to get through it was a mystery
to her. Especially if she was going to have to be a regular
audience member at the 'Spike and Melinda' show.

No, she couldn't deal with that. She would have to avoid them
as much as possible. Of course, the others would ask questions,
wanting to know why she never called on Spike for help any-
more, but she would deal with that later...when she could think
about it without dissolving into a weepy mass of quivering hurt.

This unrequited love business was agony, and she didn't know
how Spike had managed to deal with it for so long. Now that
the shoe had been transferred to the other foot with such
dazzling speed, Buffy was quite sure she wouldn't be half as
good at it as he had been.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hating the depressive silence in the house, Buffy flipped
through an old box of her mother's CDs. Most of it was
definitely not the sort of thing one should listen to when
suffering a fresh wound to the heart.

Joyce Summers had been a sucker for love songs, both
happy and sad ones, and she'd amassed an extensive collection
of each variety before she'd died.

Buffy rejected disc after disc, finally seizing on one
with a selection of Christmas music sung by various artists.

Figuring that 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer' was her
safest bet, she loaded the disc into the player and
fiddled with the volume control knob.

When she had it at a level that would drown her gloomy
thoughts without causing the neighbors to summon the
noise police, she sank down on the sofa and began her
contemplation of the tree lights.

Singing along with the yuletide cheer, she made it through
'Rudolph', 'Winter Wonderland', 'White Christmas', and
'I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus' without obsessing
over the man who no longer wanted her.

But her calm was all shot to hell when the next song began
to play.

~~~~~
"Christmas future is far away
Christmas past is past
Christmas present is here to stay
Bringing joy that will last..."
~~~~~


She couldn't bring herself to sing along with this one, al-
though neither did she get up and change the song.

~~~~~
"Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Let your heart be light
From now on, our troubles will be out of sight.."
~~~~~


Whoever was singing had a deep, soft voice. It
reminded her of the way Spike's voice had sounded
during their more intimate moments, when passion was
temporarily sated. A husky whisper in her ear, telling
her how much he loved her...would always love her.

Yeah, well....

~~~~~
"Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Make the yuletide gay
From now on, our troubles will be miles away..."
~~~~~


Sitting as rigidly still as an Easter Island stone
effigy, Buffy struggled to keep her mind out of places
it had no business going.

But it was no good, and she quickly lost whatever
tiny advantage she had gained.

Mentally throwing in the towel, she was about to lay
down and indulge in a good, old-fashioned holiday cry
fest when the front door suddenly swung open.

Upon seeing who was invading her dungeon of misery,
her mouth formed a perfect 'O' of surprise when Spike
walked in and closed the door behind him.

Their eyes met and held for a long moment, neither of
them saying a word.

He came into the front room, reaching for her hand, draw-
ing her to her feet and into his arms.

Buffy gave no resistance, melting and molding herself
against him like hot wax.

They stayed that way, their bodies moving in a slow
dance to the softly playing musical accompaniment.


~~~~~
"Here we are, as in olden days
Happy golden days of yore
Faithful friends who are dear to us
Gather near to us once more..."
~~~~~


She closed her eyes, releasing a breath she hadn't
realized she'd been holding when she felt him brush a
gentle kiss against her hair and whisper, "I'm sorry."


~~~~~
"Through the years, we all will be together
If the fates allow
Hang a shining star upon the highest bough.."
~~~~~


Clinging to him, Buffy's eyes opened to meet his...and
she knew...knew without being told...that he had been in
the same pain as she.

The look on his face told the story eloquently.

~~~~~
"And have yourself a merry little Christmas now..."
~~~~~



TBC: The...'ahem'...make up sex.

Title: Green Eyed Christmas
Author: Pattyanne
snapkik@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: None of the BtVS
characters belong to me.
Feedback: Love some, thanks.
Rating: NC-17




Part six....


~~~~~~~~~~
"The snow is falling, the city is white
Your eyes are shining like diamonds tonight
We're all alone, there's no one home
You're finally in my arms again..."
~~~~~~~~~~



The tree lights danced on the shiny waves of Buffy's
hair as Spike threaded his fingers through it. Tilting
her face up, he placed what was probably the gentlest
kiss he'd ever given her on her trembling lips.

Hoping that she hadn't fallen asleep and found herself
in the middle of a rather incredible dream, Buffy raised
up on her toes and wound her arms tightly around his
neck. Respecting his desire to keep the kiss chaste for
the moment, she kept her tongue in her own mouth.

Although he would love nothing more than to
lay her down on the carpet and make love to her right
then and there, Spike knew there were things that needed
to be said first. He gently broke their kiss and moved back
a little.

Buffy's eyes fluttered open, and she found herself staring
at his shirt front...he was wearing it! The shirt she had bought
him, the one that mirrored the blue of his eyes. Placing her
hands on the lapels of his jacket, she urged it over his
shoulders and off.

The smile on her pretty face was heart melting, and he had
to smile back. "Thank you for the gift," he said quietly.

Buffy shrugged, blushing a little. "I guess I forgot about it in
my rush to get out the door," she admitted.

"I'm glad you did," he said, pausing to collect his thoughts
for a moment. "I'll be honest with you, love...I wasn't planning
on coming after you. Not at first. I figured we'd pretty much said
all that there was to say. Rehashing it was only going to hurt
more."

"Oh," she murmured, swallowing hard. "Why did...what changed
your mind?"

He smiled, fingering the collar of the shirt. "Melinda did. She made
me open it...and she said that it must have been hard for you to find
a shirt this exact color. Said you must really care about me to go
to all that trouble over a shirt."

Buffy didn't want to talk about Melinda. But, it was time to behave
like an adult...not a spoiled little girl. "You said...that you've never
told Melinda that you love her." She took a deep breath before she
went on. "Do you....love her?"

Spike took her hands and led her over to the sofa. Sitting down,
he pulled her down beside him. "Buffy...I love YOU. You know I do.
And Melinda knows it, too. I was straight with her from the start."

Her heart was doing cartwheels. Spike still loved her! She wasn't
too late!


~~~~~~~~~~
"The night is silent, and Christmas is here
I couldn't ask for more than having you near
I love you, girl, I always will
And now I know the moment is right
The moment is right..."
~~~~~~~~~~


She opened her mouth to return the sentiment, but he
placed one finger on her lips, hushing her.

"Don't," he said, shaking his head. "Don't say something
in the heat of the moment that you might not really mean,
something you'll...regret later. I can live without it...for now.
So long as I know you don't hate me."

Buffy was about to press her point, then changed her
mind. He was right. It might not sound completely sincere
at the moment. The last thing she wanted was for him to
think she was buying him off with false feelings and words
spoken just to hold on to him.

Besides...actions ALWAYS spoke louder than words.

Scooting closer, she slipped her hands behind his
neck and drew him down to her lips. The kiss started off
slow and sweet, then caught fire.

Spike deepened the kiss, using his tongue to part
her lips. Buffy clung to him, afraid that she might
slide to the floor in a quivering heap if she didn't hold
on tight.

Their tongues met and mated, chasing from his mouth
to hers, then back to his. Wrapping his arms around
her waist, he pulled her onto his lap.She could feel the
heat rising inside of them both.

One thing their relationship had never lacked, whether
it was all about hate or all about desire, was passion. They
had it in spades. A never ending supply of it that burned
hotter between them than with anyone else in their respective
pasts.

How could they NOT be meant for each other?

Leaving her mouth, Spike kissed the soft curve of her
cheek, then traveled to her ear, biting delicately on the lobe,
making Buffy giggle.

"I like that sound," he whispered. "Do it again." His fingers
found the sensitive nape of her neck and tickled her there,
producing the desired laughter.

In all their writhing around, the top button of Buffy's
pajama jacket had popped open. Spike immediately began
kissing and licking a moist trail over her flushed skin.

Her breathing was escalating, when the mantle clock suddenly
chimed midnight.

They pulled back and smiled, truly open and delighted ex-
pressions of mutual joy.

"Happy Christmas, love."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "MERRY Christmas. This is America
and we say merry. Happy is for new years."

"Fine. Merry Christmas," he amended, reaching for his
coat and extracting a small box from the inner pocket. "Got
something for you."

~~~~~~~~~~
"I've been waiting to give this gift tonight
I'm down on my knees, there's no better time
It's something to last for as long as you live
Tonight I'm gonna give you all my heart can give.."
~~~~~~~~~~


He handed her a small, blue velvet box.

Biting her lower lip in anticipation, she took it from
him and opened the lid.

"Oh, gosh," she whispered, staring in amazement
at the content of the box, a three strand collar of
pearls, joined together by a delicate, shell pink cameo
that would lie in the hollow at the base of her throat
when the choker was fastened around her neck.

"D'ya fancy it, love?" Spike asked. He could see very
well that she did, but hearing it was nice, too.

"It's beautiful," she breathed. "The most beautiful necklace
I've ever seen." Lifting the treasure from it's velvet bed,
she turned her back and asked him to put it on her.

Smoothing her hair away from the nape of her neck, he
dropped a soft kiss there before he fastened the clasp.

Being utterly female, she had to run and see how it
looked. After admiring herself in the mirror at the foot
of the stairs, she turned back to Spike and gave him a
dazzling smile. "I love it. Thank you."

Holding her gaze with his, he stood up and paced
slowly towards her. "Well, it was my mother's," he
said.

Buffy looked at him, surprised and touched at his
wonderful offering. "Then I'll treasure it even more,"
she replied simply, kissing him with tender intent.

When they parted, he gave her that wicked smirk
that he'd perfected to an art form. "I've got more, ya
know."

"Oh, you do, huh?" Buffy replied, smiling back at
him.

"Mm-hmm. It was all I took from the house after she
died." He winked at her. "Play your cards right and
it'll all be yours."

She stood there, placing her hands on her hips. "Boy,
you must think I'm a real pushover for a handsome man with
a box of diamonds," she teased. "Is that your new plot...to
bribe me with your family jewels until I..."

She was cut off when his hand darted out and grabbed
her's, hauling her closer. "Do you know what I do to clever
little girls who make jokes about my 'family jewels' ?"

"Take them to bed and make love to them until they can't walk
straight?" she suggested hopefully.

"That's right," he said. "Good guess."

Swinging her up into his arms and eliciting a startled
squeal from her, he carried her back into the living
room and dropped to his knees, laying her on the
carpet beside the Christmas tree.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I thought I'd give you something shiny and new
I tried to find something worthy of you
But I realized when I looked inside
There's some things that money can't buy.."
~~~~~~~~~~


Lowering himself down beside her, he pulled her
close. "Buffy...let me make love to you," he said,
smoothing her hair back from her face. "It's been so
long."

"I know," she whispered. "Feels like forever."

With no hesitation, no second guessing herself, she
began to undo the remaining buttons on her pajama
top.

Spike was blatantly staring as she bared her breasts
for him. "Bloody hell," he muttered. "I'd almost forgotten
how gorgeous you are."

Taking her mouth in a long drugging kiss, moving one
hand down her side, then up to her breasts. He touched
her gently, fighting the urge to cup and weigh them in
his palm.

Using his thumb, he stroked her nipples, feeling them
stiffen.

Buffy arched her back and moaned. Unable to stop
himself he bent his head and took one hard peak into
his mouth, sucking on it and flicking it with his tongue.

The sounds she made drove him wild. Breathless and
eager, she panted and writhed in his arms.

Licking her warm skin, he moved to her other breast,
giving it the same attention.

As he sucked and nipped her, Buffy sent her hand down
to find the front of his pants. She popped open the top
snap, then fumbled for the zipper. His erection was
exerting an enormous amount of pressure, and it didn't
take much effort to free it from the confining denim.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I feel the magic whenever you're near
I feel it even more this time of year
Because I love you girl, and I always will
And now I know the moment is right
The moment is right..."
~~~~~~~~~~



Oh, she remembered this from their one night
together. Impossible to forget, she decided,
looking at him now.

She'd been surprised by the size and the attractiveness
of his 'male parts' when he'd first removed his pants and
given her a good long look at them.

Buffy had never found anything all that appealing
about the sight of a man's penis. To her, they simply
looked a bit silly when they were soft...all curled up like
half a cashew lying between their legs. "Penis envy" was
only a dimly remembered discussion topic in her psych
class. Personally, she couldn't see anything to envy
about them. She herself would have been far too
worried about catching it in a zipper and acciden-
tally amputating it. There was too much there to
remember to tuck in and keep safe, and she much
preferred owning the female model...the one that kept
the important parts carefully concealed until one was
ready to use them. Even in a state of hardness, she'd
never been that impressed with the sight of a penis.

Until she'd gotten a look at Spike's. Then she'd
understood what all the fuss was about.

Truly an "ivory shaft", Spike's phallus had beaten
out Riley's, Parker's, AND Angel's in both the size and
beauty category. It had appeared to be about 10 inches
long, although she certainly hadn't had the nerve to ask
for his measurements. With silky skin stretched tautly over
what felt like a steel rod, she had fondled and played
with it until it grew to incredible proportions.

Spike had also been the hands down winner of the 'knowing
how to use it' portion of the competition. He'd "used it" to
drive her wild no less than seven times.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I've been waiting to give this gift tonight
I'm down on my knees, there's no better time
It's something to last for as long as you live
Tonight I'm gonna give you all my heart can give.."
~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you just gonna sit and stare at it, or did you
have something else in mind?"

Spike's voice sounded amused, dragging her back from
her pleasant memories to the even more pleasant
reality.

Giving him a sassy smile, she wrapped her fingers
around his dick and squeezed it firmly, making him
gasp.

"I definitely have something else in mind," she informed
him, moving her hand up and down.

Then, she pushed him onto his back and slipped down
between his legs. She pulled his boots off and removed
his jeans, tossing them onto the sofa.

Settling herself comfortably, she licked her lips and
reached for his erection. A drop of semen formed at the
tip and she immediately rubbed it back into the firm
skin.

Spike groaned deep in his throat. His fingers slid into
her hair and urged her forward. "Come on, Buffy...don't
tease me," he rasped.

She smiled. "Tell me what you want."

Looking down, he met her eyes with his. "Take it in your
mouth and suck it."

Buffy felt a delicious shiver crawl up and down her
spine. Something else that really turned her on, some-
thing she'd no awareness of until Spike had clued her
in to it....she liked dirty talking during sex.

She liked it a lot!

Spike spoke it fluently. There was something about his
voice, so deep and insinuating, that turned a perfectly good,
old fashioned, Anglo-Saxon word like "fuck" into poetry.

And when he added the word 'me', she tingled all the
way from her head to her toes. Whether he whispered
it...shouted it...groaned it...she didn't care. Hearing it
made her feel powerful and supremely feminine.

Buffy did as he asked, enveloping him in the wet heat
of her mouth. Her tongue slid up and down his cock,
treating it like a stick of hard candy.

His fingers tightened in her hair as his eyes drifted
shut. Oh, no...that wouldn't do.

"Watch me," she said, then reclaimed her sizable
prize and sucked it, deeply and rhythmically.

Spike raised himself on one elbow, his eyes glued
to the magical joining of his dick and her mouth. It
was a splendidly erotic sight, and it drove his lust for
her sky high.

Buffy brought her free hand into play. She cupped and
fondled his scrotum, feeling it shift and tighten
in her gentle grasp, all without ever breaking eye contact
with her lover.

Tasting salty drops of ejaculate, she swirled her tongue
around the head of his shaft, gathering them and then
swallowing them down.

Spike's entire body shuddered. He dragged her back up
and kissed her long and hard on the mouth, probing with
his tongue. Rolling her onto her back, he yanked her
pajama bottoms off so roughly that they tore.

Heedlessly casting aside the damaged garment, he
pushed Buffy's legs apart and buried his face between them.
He licked her hard, using long strokes of his tongue, then
stiffened it and shoved it up into her as far as he could
force it to go.

In and out, it slithered, creating an aching need that she
would do anything to satisfy. Her own fingers crept down
to touch herself, but he shoved her hand away.

"Mine," he growled. Fastening his mouth around her clit,
he sucked it hard and fast...making her scream...making her
come. Twice.

He lifted his head, staring down at her with eyes that were
dark, hungry, and primal. "More?"

Trying to bring her mind down out of the atmosphere, she
held out her arms and raised her hips. The invitation was
quite clear, and he didn't need to be asked twice.

As he mounted her, she felt the head of his cock slide down
over her sensitized clit, finding the entrance to her body with
no trouble.

Spike plunged all the way in. Flexing his hips, he drove into
her hard and deep, possessing all of her completely. Body, mind,
heart and soul...all of it was for him.

As he pumped in and out of her in a steady rhythm, he
babbled in her ear, telling her that he loved her, that he would
always...ALWAYS...love her, no one else, and that she was
so beautiful...so hot and wet and so fucking tight!...always so
tight...and he wanted to stay inside of her forever...wanted to
spend the rest of his existence fucking her...doing it for
her...making her scream...making her come...because she
got so much tighter when it happened...so tight the way she
clamped down on him...her sweet little pussy just strangled
his dick...and didn't it feel good?...wasn't it just perfect?...how
could he have even thought about not coming back?...stupid
git, that's what he was...cause he needed her...her mouth and
her body and her tight little cunt...needed her warm and wet
around his cock...and he loved her...he loved her...he LOVED HER!


~~~~~~~~~~
"You know I'll always be true to you
And you know I'm the one you can turn to
Anytime..anyplace..or anywhere
You know that I'll always be there..."
~~~~~~~~~~


Spike rocked against her, feeling all her internal
muscles pull and tighten and clench around his
invasion. The wetness her body was producing bathed
his shaft in blessed heat. It was like nothing he'd
ever felt with any other woman.

Thrusting deeper still, so hard that her ass was being
nudged along the carpet, he stared into her eyes and
saw something he hadn't seen before.

She belonged to him now. Buffy was giving herself
totally into his keeping...her heart as well as her
body...and she was trusting him to do right by her.

He silently vowed to do just that.


~~~~~~~~~~
"I've been waiting to give this gift tonight
I'm down on my knees, there's no better time.."
~~~~~~~~~~


Their bodies slammed together, bucking and
arching. Their voices rang through the silent house,
grunting and moaning, sometimes growling with
sheer pleasure.

The need for completion coiled in both their bellies,
making them work for it. Spike pounded into her,
holding nothing back. Buffy planted her feet flat
on the rug and rammed her hips up to meet his
down thrusts, digging her nails into his back and
leaving long red scratches on his skin.

Harder and faster and hotter...they went at it for
what seemed like hours, using every part of
themselves to give and receive every scrap of
satisfaction they could.

When the tidal wave of orgasm was finally upon
them, they abandoned themselves to it as it
stretched their nerves to the breaking point
one...last...time...

She cried when it was over. Clinging to him as
though he might disappear from her arms if she
didn't, she apologized for the thoughtless, careless
words she'd flung at him before.

He held her close, calming her fevered body and soothing
her jangled soul underneath the soft glow of colored
Christmas lights.


~~~~~~~~~~
"It's something to last for as long as you live
Tonight I'm gonna give you all my heart can give.."
~~~~~~~~~~


It seemed like a good place to stop,
but there is a slightly silly epilogue
coming up.

Title: Green Eyed Christmas
Author: Pattyanne
snapkik@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: None of the BtVS
characters belong to me.
Feedback: Love some, thanks.





Part seven....
(A few days later)



Standing in front of her full length mirror, Buffy
studied her reflection carefully. Fairly pleased, and
a little embarrassed by the sight looking back at her,
she gave herself an encouraging smile. Life was good.

Tonight....it was going to get better.

After a lot of soul searching, she had decided that
this was the night to tell him how much she loved him.

Originally, she had planned to wait until New Year's Eve
for the big confession. It seemed like the perfect occasion
for such words. Everything was renewed, and the world was
given another chance to get things right.

But she'd spent a lot of time with him since their
Christmas reunion, and she'd been finding it more and
more difficult to keep her feelings to herself. There was
no way she was going to make it to New Year's Eve
without spilling her guts.

A quick reassessment of her situation had brought
about an alternate plan. She would tell Spike tonight, and
save New Year's Eve for the big 'unveiling' to her friends. It
was an ideal solution, and just maybe Xander would be
drunk enough to accept it without a big fuss.

Still, she'd wanted to do something special this night. Granted,
confessing her love would be special enough for him, she was
sure, but she felt the need for something more...something fun
and silly...and just a little bit naughty.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Her hands were moist, and they slipped on the doorknob
as she attempted to open her bedroom door.

Standing at the top of the stairs, she called down to the
man waiting for her. "There's a CD in the player. Hit track
one and sit down on the couch," she instructed.

"Why? What are you doing up there?" Spike's voice came
back to her.

Buffy sighed. "You'll see in a minute," she replied, crossing
her fingers and hoping she wasn't about to make a great
big fool of herself. "Now, do it!"

"Yes, ma'am."

A few seconds later, the music started. Taking a deep
breath for courage, she placed her dainty red high-heeled
shoe on the top step and headed downstairs.

When she hit the bottom step, she struck a seductive
pose and began to lip sing along with the CD.


"Santa, baby...just slip a sable under the tree for me
Been an awful good girl, Santa, baby
So hurry down the chimney tonight.."



Sitting on the sofa, Spike's eyes widened. "Holy Christ
on a fucking cross," he muttered under his breath, licking
his lips at the spectacle before him.

Buffy smiled seductively. This was going to work out fine.

Holding on to the banister, she leaned forward and gave him
a look at her cleavage.


"Santa, baby...a 54 convertible too, light blue
I'll wait up for you, dear
Santa, baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.."



The minute the mall had opened it's doors for
business that morning, she had been there. Ignoring
all the tempting sale offers from her favorite stores, she
had headed for the lingerie shop where she'd spotted
Spike and Melinda.

Shuddering at the memory, she had bypassed the
sexy elf costume and found something even better...a red
velvet teddy with frothy white lace trim, along with a red garter
belt and lace stockings. She had found the red high
heeled sandals in Payless, and finished the costume
with a plush red 'Santa Hat', complete with a white ball
of fluff on the end of it, that she'd located on the ' 70% off
all Christmas items' table in Spencer's, along with a pair of
red satin, elbow length gloves.



"Think of all the fun I've missed
Think of all the boys I haven't kissed
Next year I could be just as good
If you'll check off my...Christmas list.."



As she moved across the room, she purposely swung
her hips suggestively and blew him a kiss.

Whatever she'd thought she was doing, at least it
was a smashing success. Spike was grinning like an
idiot as she placed her foot on the sofa next to him
and ran one hand down her thigh.



"Santa, baby, I want a yacht and that's really not...a lot!
Been an angel all year, Santa, baby
So hurry down the chimney tonight.."



After taking a long hot bath in a tub filled with fragrant
bubbles, she had washed and dried her hair, then curled
it until it bounced around her face in shining waves.

She had gone heavier on the make up than she normally
did, using a lot of blended shadow on her eyes, then
out-lining them with a dark brown liner. Several strokes
of her mascara wand had lengthened her lashes. Her
cheeks were a dusky rose color, and her lipstick was
scarlet red. A light coat of gloss made them sexy and
moist looking."


"Santa, honey...one little thing I really need, the deed
To a platinum mine
Santa, baby...so hurry down the chimney tonight."



Spike was slumped back against the sofa, his jaw
sagging, and his eyes riveted on every move she
made.

She placed her hands on her hips, and then slowly slid
them up her sides. Thrusting her breasts forward, she
ran one teasing finger down between them.

Buffy couldn't remember the last time she'd had so
much fun...not including her sexual escapades with
her favorite vampire.



"Santa, cutie...come fill my stocking
With a place for two...and you!
Sign your X on the line, Santa, cutie
And hurry down my chimney tonight.."


He was going to try and grab her, she could tell.

The moment before his hands actually made contact
with her chest, she spun around and presented him
with her backside. He chuckled softly, and she
planted one high heeled foot on either side of his
outstretched legs, glancing coyly over her shoulder
at him.


"Come and trim my Christmas tree
With some decorations bought at...Tiffany
I really do believe in you
Let's see if you believe in me.."



The room was dimly lit, just the tree lights and a
nice little fire on the hearth. Dawn was away for
the weekend, the front door was dead-bolted against
visitors, and the phone was off the hook.

Still facing away from him, Buffy peeled off her
gloves and tossed them away. Then, she turned and
knelt on the sofa cushions, straddling Spike's lap.

Taking off her hat, she tossed her head to shake
her hair around her face and shoulders.


"Santa, baby...forgot to mention one thing, a ring
Not the kind on the phone, Santa, baby
So, hurry down my chimney tonight.."



Wiggling in his lap, she heard him gasp. He
lifted his hips to press his groin against her
bottom as she ran her hands up under her hair,
lifting it off her neck, then letting it fall.

Buffy grabbed the front of his shirt in both
hands and pulled him forward until their lips
almost touched.


"Yeah, hurry down my chimney.....tonight!"



Before he could say a word, she kissed him..long
and hard, with every bit of love she felt in her heart,
then pulled back and smiled into his dazed eyes
and whispered her Christmas message...

"I love you."


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"No...leave those on. I like 'em.."

"Okay...ah...harder..."

"You're all wet, love...juicy as a peach."

"Want a taste..oh, God...yeah."

"How do these come off? I don't...oh! Snaps. Handy."

"Shit...is this belt soldered together or something?"

"Let me...just...there, now give me your hand. Put
it right...there...tighter, love...ah, yeah...that's my
girl...my pretty girl."

"Does that feel good?...do you want...oh, it does,
doesn't it? Harder? Faster? It's up to you, baby."

"Don't tease me, little girl...s'dangerous...come on,
use your tongue...suck harder...thass it...slide it in
and out...mmm...fuck, you're good at that...ahhh!"

"My turn now...lie down...ah-ah...keep your hands
to yourself...I'll give it to you...ohhhh....deeper...come
on....all the way in...oh...oh, yes...I'm...what are you
doing?"

"Turning the tables, love...come on, now...on your hands
and knees...let me just...ahh...slide it in you...gonna fuck
you all night long, lover...that's it....move your ass
back...harder...you can do it...ah, FUCK!"

"Ah!...ah!...yeah!...do it!...feels so good...you're the
best, baby...Spike!...touch me...touch me...here."

"I will, love...gonna make my girl feel good...fuck, you're
so wet...slick and hot...want me to play with it? Rub it?"

"Oh, god, oh god, oh god...Spike...make me...make me
come...I'm so...so close....harder...harder...I'm...oh, I'm
just...so......"

"Come on, baby....come for me....do it....want to see
it...smell it...unh!...yeah!...you gonna come, love? You
ready...ready...I...I can't wait, Buffy...I'm gonna come...in-
side you...in your sweet...little....ahhhhh, SHIT! YEAH!
Ohhhh....fucking hell...I...I think you pulled it right...off..."

"What...what are YOU panting...for?"

"Fucked...fucked if I know..."

"Poor baby....come here."

"Buffy?"

"What?"

"Say it again."

"I love you, Spike. I love you..."

"Good."


~~~The End~~~

(See, I said it was a little silly)