Chapter 1

Spike crashed through the ‘Welcome to Sunnydale’ sign, as was tradition. He stepped out of the car, lighting a cigarette and placing it between his lips as he took a few drags off it. With a grin firmly in place, he looked around at his surroundings. A town that he never thought he would see again, and yet can’t seem to stay away. This time would be different, though. He would find the gem, and the Slayer wouldn’t know what hit her. She would finally be his.


* * * * *


“Mom, where’s the phone?”

Joyce Summers glanced up at her daughter. “You had it last.”

Buffy headed into the living room. “Okay, found it!”

The older woman counted to five in her head.

“Mom, where’s Dawn?!”

Joyce rubbed her temples. “She’s out with Willow and Xander. Honestly, Buffy, you were here when they picked her up.”

Buffy nodded, running back into the kitchen. “Right, I knew that. Sorry, I’m just all over the place tonight. I have this five page essay due tomorrow, I have Dawn, and not to mention the slaying. I’m surprised to even know where I put my car keys.”

Joyce cut Buffy off when it looked like she was about to speak again. “They’re by the front door.”

“Yeah, I so knew that. I’m off to the library now. Don’t wait up,” she said, placing a kiss on her mother’s cheek before leaving the house.


* * * * *


Buffy waved goodbye to her study buddy, glad to finally be going home. Riley seemed like a decent enough guy, and he was obviously interested in her, but dating was just not an option at the moment. Not with everything else she had to deal with.

“Well, well, what do we have here?”

Buffy groaned as she gazed up at the night sky. “Why do you hate me?” she asked, turning around to face the familiar vampire standing behind her. “Spike, and so my night is complete. What are you doing here? For someone that claims to hate this town so much, you sure do love to visit.”

Spike shrugged. “What can I say, Slayer? I got bored, decided to see what you’ve been up to.” He looked her up and down. “Have to say, the last year has done right by you. I’m glad to see you’ve put on some weight.”

Buffy was confused by their conversation, but didn’t have much time to dwell on it. “Is there something in particular that you wanted? I have to pick up Dawn.” She cursed herself for revealing that much, hoping the vampire would leave it alone, but there was no such luck.

“Who’s Dawn?”

Buffy thought of something fast to say. “My sister, who else?”

He shook his head. “You don’t have a sister.”

She rolled her eyes. “I think I would know if I had a sister or not. Look, I don’t have time for this. We can fight later. I have to go.”

Spike watched her walk away, knowing that something didn’t seem right, but it would have to wait for the time being. He had a gem to dig for.


* * * * *


With a roar of triumph, Spike placed the ring on his finger. It was a bit smaller than he thought it would be, but he was just relieved to actually find it, something that was known as a myth. Spike grinned, feeling like taking a stroll in the sunlight, possibly by the UC Sunnydale campus.


* * * * *


“I can’t believe you brought her here.”

Buffy glared at the dark haired boy. “I didn’t have much of a choice. If someone would help me out every once in a while, I wouldn’t have to rely on my mother for everything. I don’t know where we would be right now if it wasn’t for her. This is just as much my responsibility as it is yours, Parker.”

He scoffed. “I told you before; I don’t want any part in this. You’ve done well for yourself these last few months. I don’t want anything to do with either one of you.”

Buffy was used to hearing that, but it didn’t make it hurt any less. “God, you’re such a dick. I can’t believe I ever slept with you, but you’re right. I’ve been doing just fine without you.”

Parker nodded. “Good, are we done here?” He took off, not bothering to wait for a response.

“Bloody pillock, you actually dated that wanker?”

The voice came from behind her and she turned around to address him. “We never dated, just slept together once. It was a horrible mistake, and why are you not bursting into flames right now?” Buffy finished, seeming to just take notice of that fact.

Spike smiled. “The Gem of Amara,” he answered, holding up his hand to show her the ring. “Makes the wearer invincible and for vampires, able to go out during the day.”

Buffy’s eyes widened as she moved to block the object at her side. “Oh, I take it this is the reason you came back.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yeah, something like that.” A soft cooing sound had him turning his attention on to the stroller next to her, peering inside to see the small infant. “Is this Dawn?” he wondered.

All Buffy could do was nod.

Spike gave a low whistle. “Wait to go, Joyce. It’s nice to see that she’s still getting plenty of action for a woman her age. Not that I think she’s old or anything, I’m definitely not one to talk, but good for her. Unless the father is your git of a Watcher, I heard about the band candy incident.”

Buffy scrunched up her nose in distaste. “Let’s never speak of that again, I’m still trying to get the image out of my head.”

He agreed. “So, who is the lucky bloke?”

Buffy looked away for a moment. “I wouldn’t really say lucky, but you just saw him.”

It was Spike’s turn to look disgusted. “That moron was putting it to your mum?”

“Gross, can you possibly be even more disturbing? It’s me, okay? Dawn isn’t my sister, she’s my daughter.”

That was the last thing Spike expected to hear. “Should have known,” he whispered after a few seconds, gazing down at the sleeping child. “She does look just like you.”

“Right, look, can we not fight right now? Obviously that’s why you got the gem, but I would rather not do it with my daughter around. You can try and kill me later.”

His head shot up, seeming shocked by what she just said. “Wait, you think I came back to kill you?”

“Well, yeah, didn’t you?”

He would have laughed at just the idea of it, but kept a serious expression. “No, I bloody well didn’t. I especially wouldn’t now.”

Buffy raised her eyebrows. “Why? Because I’m a mother? Why should you care about that?”

“Give me some credit, Slayer. I’d like to think I’m not that heartless. I came back because…” his voice trailed off, not sure how to finish that sentence. When it looked like Buffy was waiting for him to continue, he took a deep, unneeded breath and did just that. “I came back because I realized that I’m in love with you.”

Buffy couldn’t tell if he was joking or not. She tried to think of something witty to say in response, but all she could manage was, “huh?”

Chapter 2

“Oh, you’re joking. That’s funny, but I don’t get it.”

He shook his head, letting her know with his eyes that it was not a joke.

Buffy didn’t know what to think. “You do know how crazy that sounds, right?”

Spike shrugged. “Stranger things have happened, I’m sure. I admit, I wasn’t expecting for you to have a little one of your own, but that doesn’t change anything.”

Buffy took a step back, shaking her head adamantly. “Spike, you can’t do this to me, not now. I have too much going on; I don’t even have time to breathe. I have to find someone to watch Dawn tomorrow night because my mom is working late, and the guys are busy. Plus, it’s not fair of me to go to them with everything. The father wants nothing to do with me or the baby, so he’s no help. I’m falling apart here. If one more thing gets complicated in my life, I think I might just lose it.”

He held his hands up. “All right, one less complication. I’ll watch the nibblet for you.”

“Are you serious? Spike, I can’t ask you to do that. Why would you even want to? And no offense, but I don’t know if I trust you enough for that. The last time we met, you tried to kill me and my friends. In fact, that gem makes me trust you even less.”

Spike expected that, but he wasn’t about to give up. “Then let me prove to you that you can trust me. I’ve changed, Buffy. I promise, no harm will come to the little one. You have my word on that.”

Buffy didn’t know why, but she believed him. “Okay, I’m only agreeing to this because I’m desperate at the moment, but you better not make me regret it. I’ll be patrolling around seven, so you can come by the house then.”

“You’re still slaying?” he wondered.

“It’s not like I have much of a choice. Baby or not, I’m still the Slayer. Someone has to do it.”

Spike didn’t like that. He would rather be out there patrolling with her, but he already promised to watch the tyke.

Buffy gazed up at him. “I have to ask, why the gem? If not to kill me, then why did you bother with it?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, which was sometimes a nervous habit of his. “Well, we’re outside during the day, aren’t we? I haven’t been out in the sunlight for over a hundred years; I guess I never realized just how much I’ve missed it. Seeing you in the sun is just an added bonus, you’re not meant for the dark, I know that now. I guess this was my way of having a part of you, looking at the world the way you do.”

Buffy had to admit, she was touched by the gesture. “That’s really sweet of you, Spike. A little weird, but still sweet. I’m not looking for anything right now. The most I can offer you is friendship; I just have too much on my plate. I hope you can understand that.”

Spike nodded. “It’s more than I thought I would get.” Sure, she said that now, but Spike was very determined to change her mind. It was only a matter of time.

“Great, um, could you watch her for a second? I have to talk to a teacher really fast.”

He nodded again, watching as she took off in the other direction. Spike gazed down at the child, who was now awake and staring right at him. He bent down to pick her up, staring into her angelic features. “God, you’re beautiful, just like your mum. We’re gonna get along just fine, aren’t we, bit?” He tickled her a little, causing Dawn to let out a cute little giggle. It brought a bright smile to Spike’s face. This was definitely where he belonged.


* * * * *


“Okay, she has everything she needs in the nursery. Emergency numbers are on the fridge, along with my cell and Mom’s work number. If anything goes wrong, don’t hesitate to call any of us. Don’t let anyone in that doesn’t have a key, especially not if they’re of the very pale variety.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Vampire, love, I think I would know if I was in the presence of one. Don’t worry, the bit’s in good hands.”

She nodded. “For some reason, that doesn’t freak me out. I should be back in a couple of hours.” Buffy picked Dawn up, cradling the infant to her chest. “Mommy will be back soon, baby. You be good for Uncle Spike, okay?”

He cringed at that, uncle wasn’t exactly what he had in mind.

Buffy put the baby back down, looking up at him. “Sorry, she’s only four months old; I still get a bit crazy about leaving her.”

“That’s perfectly understandable, love. It just shows that you’re a great mum.”

That got a smile out of her. “All right, I’ll be back in a little while. Thanks again for doing this; I didn’t like the idea of taking another night off from patrolling.”

Spike smiled as well. “Sure, any time you need a sitter, I’ll be here.” He couldn’t believe how his life turned out. The once Big Bad being the bloody babysitter for the Slayer’s offspring, but looking at the gorgeous smile on her face, he wouldn’t have it any other way.


* * * * *


Buffy was exhausted when she entered the house later that night, placing her jacket by the door and heading into the living room, stopping at the adorable display in front of her. Spike was lying on the couch, with Dawn sound asleep and resting on his chest. She hurried to grab the camera, taking a few pictures while she could, which caused him to wake up.

“What are you doing?”

She took one more shot before putting the camera away. “This is great blackmail material; Xander will get a kick out of it.”

Spike groaned, being careful not to wake the baby. “And they say I’m evil,” he muttered.

“I’ll take her upstairs,” Buffy whispered, picking the baby up gently as she quietly made her way to the nursery, putting Dawn down in her crib and shutting the door behind her. She found Spike sitting up now, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He was just too cute, and that was something Buffy never thought she would think about Spike. “Did she give you any trouble?”

He shook his head, making room for her on the couch. “Perfect angel, I think she’s already warming up to me.”

“Wow, she normally doesn’t feel that comfortable with strangers. It took her two months to stop crying whenever she was around Xander.”

Spike chuckled. “What can I say? Nibblet has bloody good taste.”

She slapped his chest lightly. “You should probably get going now. Where are you staying, anyway?”

“I got a crypt in Restfield cemetery, it’s quite posh.”

She scrunched up her nose. “Whatever you say, I haven’t told the others about you being back yet. I was meeting them at the Magic Box tomorrow after classes, if you wanted to stop by. Make a grand entrance by strolling in during the day; I already can’t wait to see the look on their faces. They’re going to tell me I’m crazy for trusting you, but maybe you could convince them of that better than I can. That is, if you’re really determined to be on my side, that this isn’t just a phase you’ll soon get over. You can’t keep killing people; I don’t need that on top of everything else.”

Spike agreed. “I already gave that up, unlike some vampires that will remain nameless, I can control myself. I already went to the butcher’s, stocked up on a ton of pig’s blood, it’ll have to do.”

“You’re really serious about this, aren’t you?”

He took her hand in his, giving it a light squeeze. “You’re worth it.”

Buffy was in trouble. If he didn’t stop saying stuff like that, it would be way too easy to fall in love with him.

Chapter 3

“This is very irresponsible of you, Buffy.”

She rolled her eyes as Giles cleaned his glasses once again. “I was knocked up at eighteen; responsible isn’t exactly in the cards anymore. Besides, I know what I’m doing. Spike has been nothing but nice to me since he got back, which yeah, has been all of one day, but that is so not the point. If he wanted to kill me, he could have. I told you about the gem.”

Giles nodded. “And that only makes me worry even more, he’s invincible now. You can’t trust him.”

“That’s for me to decide. Look, I get your concern, I really do, but I’m dying here. He’s offering to help me out, I’m not about to turn that down. I love you guys, but I can’t keep asking you to give up your lives to watch my baby, it wouldn’t be fair. Spike doesn’t really have a life, so it’s perfect.”

“And where is he? Didn’t you say he would meet you here?” Giles wondered.

Buffy nodded as well. “Yeah, I’m sure he’ll be here any second. He’s probably just running late,” she responded, but having a feeling that something didn’t seem right. Where the hell was that vampire?


* * * * *


Spike grinned when he saw his victim; prowling across the college campus, he didn’t stop until he reached the boy.

“I want a word with you, mate.”

Parker raised his eyebrows. “Do I know you?”

Spike sent him a glare. “No, but I know of you. Used to have a little thing with Buffy Summers, didn’t you?”

Parker laughed. “Believe me, man, you don’t want anything to do with her. She’s too clingy, if you get my meaning. We had a one night stand, which wasn’t all that good, but at least she got the job done. Ever since then she’s been constantly following me around, it’s a little pathetic if you ask me.”

Spike clenched his fists at his side, knowing this would be worth it. “I promised I wouldn’t kill anymore, but for you, I think I’ll make an exception.”


* * * * *


Buffy headed out of her last class, ready to give Spike a piece of her mind the next time she saw him. A commotion had her turning her attention to the entrance of the school.

“You’re never going to believe this, he’s just hanging there.” Buffy heard someone say, heading outside to join everyone else. Her jaw dropped at what she saw, Parker Abrams hanging from the flagpole by his underwear, screaming bloody murder for someone to get him down.

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me.” She had a feeling about who was behind that little stunt. “I’m going to kill him.”


* * * * *


She burst into his crypt later that night, not caring about knocking first.

“Are you out of your mind?!”

Spike put the book down that he was reading. “What are you on about?”

Buffy gave him a seething look. “Don’t act all innocent with me, you know what you did. Seriously, Spike, flinging him up the flagpole? That is so high school, even for you. What were you trying to prove? And don’t even think about denying it, I know it was you. What were you thinking?”

He shrugged. “The bloody moron was running his mouth off about you, it pissed me off. I figured you would at least be grateful that I didn’t kill him, you don’t know how tempted I was to do it.”

Buffy rubbed her now aching head. “I may not exactly be Parker’s number one fan, but he’s still the father of my child. Whether I like it or not, that’s just how it is. You can’t pull shit like that just because you don’t like what he has to say. I’m sure I’ve heard a lot worse from him. And because of your little stunt, you didn’t show up at the Magic Box, which had Giles all ‘I told you so’ about not being able to trust you. If you’re going to be in my life, I have to be able to trust you. I can’t allow you around my daughter if this continues, Spike.”

He nodded, looking slightly ashamed. “Right, sorry, won’t happen again. You can trust me; I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you or the bit. I just, when I think about how that wanker treated you, and to not want anything to do with his own daughter, I see red. I’ll try to control myself in the future, though.”

“Thanks, that means a lot. It’s kind of nice, having you protect my honor. Even though I’m totally against what you did, seeing him stranded up there like that was pretty funny, but it’s still wrong.”

Spike agreed, lowering his head sheepishly. “Yes, very wrong, won’t do it again.”

Buffy smiled, he was just too cute sometimes. She still couldn’t believe that just a year ago they were enemies. “Will you come to the Magic Box tomorrow? I can’t convince them of your intentions on my own.”

“I’ll be there, with bells on,” he said with a smirk.

Buffy rolled her eyes, but there was a hint of a smile on her face. “Okay, I have to get to work now. I’m already running late as it is.”

Spike raised his eyebrows in confusion. “Work? You mean patrolling?”

She shook her head. “No, I mean an actual paying job. I forced myself to get one after Dawn was born. I didn’t feel right having my mom always pay for everything.”

“So, let me get this straight. You go to school, patrol, take care of a baby, and go to work? You’re bloody amazing, is what you are.”

Buffy blushed at the look of admiration in his eyes. “It’s only a part time job. I work a few nights here and there, occasionally they’ll have me come in during the day when I don’t have classes. I really need the money, but I seriously can’t wait for when I can quit that place. I’m tired of always smelling like doublemeat burgers,” she finished with a grimace.

Spike smiled fondly as he watched her leave the crypt, letting out a sigh. How was he going to just be her friend when all he wanted to do was grab and kiss her senseless? This was going to be a lot harder than he thought.

Chapter 4

Buffy glanced back and forth between the two British men, both with scowls on their faces.

“Are you guys having a staring contest or something? No one’s said anything for the last ten minutes.”

Giles finally broke his gaze, focusing on Buffy. “I just don’t understand how you could trust him enough to watch Dawn. Have you forgotten everything that happened with Angel?”

Buffy crossed her arms over her chest. “No, I haven’t forgotten. I never forget, but Spike isn’t Angel. I’ve always known that. Even when he was trying to kill me, he’s never been like other vampires.”

“This is crazy! You bring the undead here like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Not only trusting him with our lives, but the life of your daughter? Have you completely lost your mind?” Xander spoke up.

Buffy felt a migraine coming on. “I can’t deal with this right now. I already said all that I needed to, if you guys can’t accept this, it’s really not my problem. I’m just so tired of everything, sometimes it feels like I might die from exhaustion. Spike is offering to help me, I’m not about to turn that down.”

Willow gave her friend a look of concern. “You have us, Buffy. We can help out with anything you need. You know me and Tara don’t mind watching Dawn.”

She nodded. “And I appreciate all that you’ve done for me, but you can’t help me all the time. You have your own lives to worry about. I’ll be fine; you really don’t have to worry about Spike.”

He smiled and moved closer to her side, showing her friends that he wasn’t going anywhere.

Willow wasn’t that convinced, but she nodded in acceptance, then realized something else. “Wait, are you the one that put Parker on top of the flagpole? I heard about that, but I wasn’t around to witness it.”

Spike shoved his hands in his pockets, flashing her a grin. “Not my best work, but the wanker had it coming.”

Giles cleaned his glasses, shaking his head and mumbling something that no one could make out.

Xander laughed. “That was you? Okay, there may be hope for you yet. This doesn’t mean we’re gonna start being the best of friends or anything, but that got you some points. I never liked that guy,” he said with distaste.

“As funny as it was, I already yelled at him for it and that won’t be happening again. Don’t give me that look, Giles. It’s not like he killed the guy.”

Giles rolled his eyes. “I need a drink,” he muttered, then headed to the back of the store.

Buffy turned to Spike. “Well, I think that’s the best you’re going to get. It could have been worse.”


* * * * *


She entered his crypt, quietly for a change. Taking a look around, but not spotting the vampire.

“Spike? Are you here?”

He popped up from the lower level, smiling at the sight of her. “To what do I owe this pleasure?”

She smiled shyly, taking a deep breath before responding. “Well, um, I asked my mom first, but she’s busy tomorrow night. So, I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind watching Dawn for me. It’ll just be for a few hours or so.”

Spike didn’t hesitate before nodding. “Of course, you have to work?”

“No, actually, I kind of have a date.” Buffy hated the hurt expression on his face, even more knowing that she was the cause of it.

“Oh, I see. So, when you said you weren’t looking for anything right now, you just meant with me.”

“That’s not it, Spike. Riley’s just a friend from school. He’s been interested in me and when he asked me out, I couldn’t seem to say no. I doubt it would really lead to anything, and I was hoping my mom could watch Dawn for me, but she can’t. And all the others were busy, too. Believe me, I asked everyone else first. It didn’t feel right asking you this after what you told me the other day, but I didn’t have much of a choice.”

He held his hand up. “Breathe, Slayer, it’s fine. I don’t mind watching the nibblet for you. This is important to you, having some semblance of a normal life.”

She could still tell that he was hurt, and it bothered her more than she thought it would. “Spike…”

He pressed his finger to her lips, cutting off anything else she would have said. “It’s okay, Buffy. I told you I wasn’t expecting anything from you. Bloody hell, you’ve already given me way more than I deserve. What time should I come over tomorrow?”

“Eight should be fine; are you really okay with this?”

Spike nodded, giving her a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m fine, but I could really kill something right about now. You wanna patrol?”

She nodded as well, figuring that might be just what they needed.


* * * * *


“Fuck, are you all right? That demon came out of nowhere.”

Buffy groaned as he helped her sit on a nearby tombstone, taking a look at the bloody wound on her leg where the demon’s claws got a hold of her. “It’s just a scratch; I should have seen him coming. It’s not your fault; I’ve just been so distracted lately.”

He didn’t like the sound of that, distraction could get her killed. “I guess you’re not the only one. Let’s get you home, we need to put something on that before it gets infected. Can you walk?”

Buffy nodded and got off the tombstone, taking his arm as to not fall down. “Lead the way,” she told him.

Spike smiled, feeling pleased that she was letting him help her. He knew how stubborn Buffy could be sometimes.


* * * * *


“There, as good as new,” Spike commented, placing a kiss to her bandage.

Buffy felt shivers at the contact, unsure of what that meant.

He glanced up at her, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

She was caught in his gaze, realizing for probably the first time just how blue his eyes were. Buffy turned away when it became too intense, taking in a deep breath. “I should probably get some rest.”

Spike agreed, the moment broken. “Yeah, I’ll check in on Dawn for you. Make sure Nibblet is all snug in her crib.”

Buffy gave him a smile. “Thank you,” she whispered, making herself comfortable in her bed.

Spike waited until she was situated, then bent down and touched his lips to her forehead. “Sweet dreams, love.”

Before she could respond, he was already out of the room.


* * * * *


Spike stared at the sleeping child in her crib, thinking again about how utterly beautiful she was. He didn’t understand how anyone could walk out on such a perfect being. If Dawn was his daughter, no power on Earth would ever make him leave her side. And leaving Buffy? That wasn’t even an option. No, he was here for the long haul. Spike never could leave the woman he loved, even if she never loved him back.

Chapter 5

Spike was bouncing Dawn on his lap, delighted in the sound of her giggles. A throat being cleared had him turning his attention to the staircase, his jaw nearly dropping at the vision before him.

“Is this okay? It’s been a while since I’ve actually dated.”

He nodded, seeming to have lost the ability to speak. She was wearing a red halter top, with a black skirt that left little to the imagination. Her hair fell around her shoulders in golden waves, light make up adorning her features, and she looked absolutely breathtaking. “Bloody hell,” was all he managed to get out.

Buffy smiled shyly. “I’ll take that as a good reaction, then. Okay, you know where everything is. I should be back around eleven. Thanks again for doing this, I really appreciate it.”

Spike waved his hand in the air. “Think nothing of it, you may be the Slayer, but you deserve to have a night off once in a while. Go, have fun, the nibblet will be fine.”

She gave him a quick hug, then pressed a kiss to the baby’s forehead and with one more smile, made her way out of the house.

Spike watched her go, wondering yet again just what he was getting himself into.


* * * * *


“So, how’s Dana doing?”

Buffy rolled her eyes, but plastered a smile on her face. “It’s Dawn, and she’s doing fine.”

Riley nodded. “That’s good; I still can’t believe Parker won’t even help you out. He gives all men a bad name.”

She shrugged. “I’ve been able to manage fine without him. I have my mom and my friends, not every child needs a father. Sometimes they’re better off without one.”

Riley took a deep breath, figuring it was time to get to the point. “There’s actually a reason I asked you out tonight, Buffy. I know all about you. Well, I know that you’re pretty strong. I saw you take out three vampires the other night on your own. With your strength, I almost thought you might be a demon or something, but then I figured if you were, you wouldn’t be fighting your own kind. I’ve been curious about you ever since.”

Buffy didn’t know what to think about this new bit of information. “How do you even know about vampires?”

“Come on, you live in Sunnydale long enough, you see things. I’m actually a demon hunter myself; I’m part of this secret organization. We’re not supposed to tell anyone, but I knew you were someone we could trust. I told my boss all about you and she’s really interested to meet you, maybe do some tests to see how strong you are. We could really use someone like you on the team.”

She took it all in, shaking her head. “Let me get this straight, the only reason you’ve been interested in me at all is because I’m strong? So, all of this was just to get me to join your squad of demon fighters?”

“I know I may have gone about it the wrong way, but I wouldn’t have told you about this if I didn’t think it was really important.”

Buffy nodded and stood up. “Sorry to disappoint, but I’m really not interested.”

He watched her walk away, a look of confusion on his face.


* * * * *


Buffy found the living room empty when she got home, heading upstairs to the nursery and stopping at the sight in front of her. Spike was standing over Dawn’s crib, singing a soft tune to the infant.

He turned when he felt her presence in the room, giving her a warm smile.

Buffy smiled in return, moving out of the way as he left the room, shutting the door behind him.

They headed back downstairs, neither saying a word, until Spike broke the silence.

“I wasn’t expecting you back so soon. Date not go well?”

Buffy laughed humorlessly. “It really didn’t. In fact, I wouldn’t even call it a date. It was more like a business meeting.” When she saw the confused look on his face, she decided to clarify. “Riley is part of some secret demon organization. He was only out with me because he saw me fighting vampires and wanted to learn more about me. Apparently, he was trying to get me to join the organization, but I turned him down. God, I feel so stupid. I didn’t have any real feelings for him, but I was flattered when I thought he was actually interested in me. I should have known better.”

Spike shook his head, taking her hand and pulling her down on the couch. “He’s a bloody idiot, love. It was his loss, and I wouldn’t trust a demon operation as far as I can throw them. Something doesn’t seem right about that. They need to leave the demon hunting to the professionals. I bet you could give them all a run for their money.”

She gave him a genuine smile. “Yeah, I suppose we should look into it. I don’t want amateurs thinking they can kill demons in my town, but I have a really bad feeling that they do more than just kill them. I’ll talk to Giles about it tomorrow. Right now, I just wanna sleep.”

He nodded. “Right, I’ll get out of here, but just think about what I said, Buffy. I know you well enough by now to know that you’ll start doubting yourself because of this. It’s not your fault that he’s such a bloody moron. The man had a chance to date you and he didn’t even appreciate it. You deserve someone that knows how amazing you are. I don’t want you to ever doubt yourself, all right?”

Buffy gazed deeply into his eyes; once again in awe by how much he’d changed. With that thought in mind, she leaned in to press a tender kiss to his lips. It was supposed to last only for a second, but Spike had other plans and turned the kiss more passionate, slipping his tongue in her mouth. She pulled away when it started to get to be too much. “Wait, we have to stop.”

He obeyed, even though stopping was the last thing he wanted to do.

Buffy cupped his cheek when he turned away, forcing his gaze back on hers. “The only reason I even bothered to go out with Riley is because I knew it wouldn’t lead to anything, but with you, there’s a pretty big chance it would. And I’m just not ready for that yet, William. I hope you can understand.”

His eyes widened at the use of his given name, not expecting to hear it from her. Spike nuzzled the hand that was still resting on his cheek, giving her a smile. “I’ll wait forever, even beyond that if I have to. I’m not going anywhere.”

She was very relieved to hear that, and knew that he was being sincere. Spike was the one that never left, and even if he did, he would always come back.

Chapter 6

Spike entered the kitchen, smiling at Joyce and rubbing the back of his neck.

“Sorry, guess I fell asleep on the couch again. Why didn’t Buffy wake me?”

She smiled in return. “Buffy said that you looked too cute, she didn’t have the heart to wake you.”

If vampires could blush, Spike would have at that moment. “Not bloody cute,” he mumbled.

“You know, Spike, we could fix the basement up for you, if you don’t want to keep going back to your crypt. It’s like you practically live here, anyway.”

He looked sheepish. “I didn’t realize I was here that much, I hope I haven’t put you out.”

Joyce waved her hand in the air, used to his politeness by now. It still amazed her that this was the same vampire she hit on the head with an axe a few years ago. “It’s not a problem; I know Buffy doesn’t mind having you around. We could always use the extra help.”

Spike nodded. “Well, thanks for the offer, but I think I should keep the crypt. A bloke needs his own space, after all. I have my reputation to think of, it’ll all get shot to Hell if I move in with the Slayer and her mum permanently.”

Joyce accepted his answer, even though she knew it was all a front. Spike had stopped caring about his reputation long ago.

A baby crying put on hold whatever else they would have said.

“I’ve got her,” Spike commented before making his way out of the kitchen.

Joyce smiled once again as she watched him leave. Yes, having him around really did come in handy. Now if only Buffy would open her eyes more to the wonderful man that Spike was becoming, he would be perfect for her little girl. Joyce gave up wanting a normal life for her daughter, knowing it wasn’t in the cards and Buffy would hardly be happy with normal. While a vampire wasn’t exactly her first choice of a companion for her daughter, Joyce knew that no one else would be good enough. She had a feeling Buffy knew that as well.


* * * * *


“I’ve never been so tired in my life.”

He chuckled, giving her hand a squeeze and cuddling the sleeping child resting in between them.

They were both lying in Buffy’s bed, her being exhausted after a tiring day of school, work, and patrol.

“I feel like I’m nineteen going on thirty,” she claimed.

Spike gazed over at her. “And you have a birthday coming up, how does it feel knowing that you won’t be a teenager much longer?”

She thought about it. “I’m relieved, actually. I never thought I would make it this long.”

Spike squeezed her hand again, a tremor going through him at the thought of her not being there anymore. It wouldn’t happen, not while he was around.

Buffy turned on her side to stare at him, taking in a deep breath. “Why are you so different?”

“What do you mean?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know of any other vampire that would be here with me right now, watching my kid. The way you care for her, it’s like nothing I’ve seen before and you’ve only been here for a month. I wouldn’t be surprised if her first word was ‘Daddy’ at this point.”

It was as if his heart came to life at those words, but he tried to act casual. “And if that did happen? Would you be okay with it?”

Buffy didn’t hesitate with her response. “Yeah, I mean, you’re already better than her actual father. I can’t see Parker rocking her to sleep when she wakes up crying, or singing to her. I think he might be tone deaf. Although, he hit a pretty high note from the top of the flagpole.”

Spike laughed, still not ashamed by his actions, but she wasn’t finished.

“It’s just that you don’t have a soul. Angelus would never be in this position right now, but you’ve always been different from him. What’s a soul, anyway?” she whispered, closing her eyes as the day finally caught up with her.

Spike felt guilty as he watched her sleep. When the time was right, he would finally tell her the truth about where he was before returning to Sunnydale. He just hoped that it wouldn’t scare her away.


* * * * *


“Hey, can we talk?”

Buffy rolled her eyes. “Vocal-cord-wise, yes. With each other? No.”

Parker grabbed her arm before she could take off. “I’m sorry, okay? I’ve been a jerk, I know that. I’m in college and I’ve never even had a real relationship, when you told me about the baby, I panicked. I don’t know how to handle stuff like that, but I’m willing to try.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Who are you and what have you done with Parker Abrams?”

He grinned. “Yeah, it’s this whole new thing I’m trying. I really like you, Buffy. You’re the only one that I’ve ever developed real feelings for. When I realized that, I got confused and ended things. I guess what I’m saying is that I would like another chance. I know there’s probably no possibility of that, but I would at least like to be there for my daughter. She’s going to need a father in her life.”

Buffy didn’t know what to say. This was always what she hoped would happen, Parker finally stepping up and taking responsibility for his actions, but that was before Spike came back into her life. Now, she didn’t know what to do.


* * * * *


“There’s no bloody way!”

Buffy sighed, knowing he wouldn’t take it well. “What was I supposed to do, Spike? Tell him that he can never see his daughter? I know Parker is an ass, but this is the first time he’s ever offered to do something right. I’m not going to get back together with him. That’ll never happen, but if he wants to be in Dawn’s life, there’s nothing I can do about it. He has every right to want to get to know his daughter.”

“She’s my daughter, dammit!” he growled. “You practically said so yourself. What? He decides to be a father for all of a second and you’re just gonna let him? I’ve known blokes like him before, Buffy. He’ll never keep up with it; wankers like Parker aren’t capable of that. You’re only going to set yourself and Dawn up for heartache if you let him into your lives. I don’t want him to hurt either of you again.”

Buffy placed a calming hand on his shoulder. “I know you’re concerned. I am, too, but we should at least give him a chance. If all you said is right, then he’s gone, but everyone deserves a second chance. You should know that better than anyone.”

Spike nodded and headed over to the front door, turning back to her one more time. “Right, and let’s say he does actually become a good father for the nibblet. Where would I fit in, then?” he said sadly, leaving the house without waiting for a response.

Chapter 7

“Spike, you don’t have to be here.”

He shook his head. “I’m not leaving you alone with that wanker.”

She rolled her eyes. “I can take care of myself, you know.”

“Still, I’m staying.”

Buffy figured there was no sense arguing with him about it. There was a knock on the door, she went to answer it and gave Parker a small smile. “I’m surprised you actually came.”

“I told you I would,” he commented, walking into the house, his eyes widening at the sight of Spike, who gave him a grin.

Buffy looked between them, clearing her throat. “Okay, I’ll just go get Dawn. Be nice,” she told Spike firmly, then headed upstairs.

Spike looked the boy up and down, delighted in the scent of fear that was coming from him. “Let’s get one thing straight, I don’t like you, but for some reason, Buffy thinks you deserve a second chance. You do anything to hurt them, and I’ll make sure no one finds your body.”

Parker gulped, taking a step back. He sighed in relief when Buffy returned, a small bundle in her arms.

She took a deep breath, handing the baby over to Parker, who looked like he would rather be doing anything else than that.

Spike growled. “You’re not holding her right, support the head.”

Parker did as he said, fearing for his life otherwise.

Buffy gave Spike a grateful smile.

He smiled in return, pulling her aside. “You sure you can handle him? I have something to do, but I should be back in an hour.”

“Yeah, we’ll be fine.”

Spike nodded, even though he didn’t want to leave. He gave Parker one more seething look, then left the house.

Once he was gone, Parker chose that moment to speak up. “Are you sure you can trust that guy, Buffy? I think he might be in a gang or something. He doesn’t exactly strike me as someone that should be around kids. Do you know what he did to me?”

Buffy rolled her eyes for what felt like the millionth time. “Yes, and I told him not to pull anything like that again, but I can’t exactly blame him for what happened. Spike’s a friend, one that happens to be very overprotective. He loves Dawn, there’s no one else I would trust her with more.”

Parker saw the determined expression on her face and decided to drop it, for now.


* * * * *


Spike wasn’t happy to find Abrams still at the house when he got back; even more so at the gooey look he was giving Buffy. With that thought in mind, he strolled over to her, a smile firmly in place. He pulled her closer, planting a passionate kiss on her lips, and only ending it when she was good and breathless.

“Sorry I’m late, baby. How are things going here?”

Once she broke out of her daze, she slapped him lightly across the chest. “It’s going fine, but Parker was just leaving.”

The brunette boy nodded, giving Buffy a nod and receiving a scowl from Spike. “I’ll just see you in school,” he said, then headed out the front door.

Buffy glared at Spike after he left. “What was that about? It felt like you were marking your territory or something.”

He shrugged. “Just making sure the boy knows where he stands, I didn’t like the way he was looking at you.”

“Spike, we talked about this. Whether he’s giving me looks or not, I have no plans to ever get back with him. Parker is only my baby’s sperm donor, that’s it. I’m only bothering with him at all because for some reason, he wants to be in her life. You don’t have to be jealous.”

Spike scoffed. “Please, I’m not jealous. I don’t get jealous, especially not of some pansy college bloke.”

Buffy nodded. “Of course you don’t, but I’m just saying that you don’t have to worry about him.”

That made him feel relieved, and even though he told himself that he wasn’t jealous, he couldn’t help it. Parker had a part of Buffy that he could never touch. The wanker was able to give her a child, something that Spike never would be able to do, no matter how much he wanted to.


* * * * *


She ran through the cemetery, glancing quickly behind her to see that the soldiers were still chasing her. She had to get away from them, never wanting to go back to that place. She shuddered at just the thought of it. She got distracted trying to see how close they were, and tripped over a branch. She knew it was all over as she shut her eyes, opening them at the sound of a commotion going on. She saw a bleached blond man attack the soldiers, putting up a pretty good fight against them. She heard one of the men yell something to the others, then take off in the opposite direction, sighing in relief once they were gone. The blond man turned back to her, just in time for her to notice his face morph back to that of a human and God, he was gorgeous.

“Hey, you all right?” he wondered, knowing this girl was a vampire, but for some reason not wanting them to get a hold of her.

Oh, he had an accent, too, she thought to herself as she licked her lips. “I am now, I don’t know what I would have done if you didn’t show up. I was trapped in some sort of compound, I only managed to escape because I tricked them into thinking I drank their poisoned blood when they let me out of my cage. That place was so horrible. They do all kinds of experiments on other vampires and demons, some are even harmless. I’ve only been a vampire for a little over a year, but I must have been in there for months. I lost track of time.”

Spike’s eyes widened, realizing this was the secret organization that Buffy talked about, and was relieved again to know that she didn’t join up with them. He definitely didn’t like what he was hearing. “You should come with me; they probably won’t stop looking for you. Is there anything else you can remember about that place?”

She nodded and followed him out of the cemetery. “I can tell you anything that you wanna know,” she replied, somewhat flirtatiously.

He felt a bit uncomfortable under her stare. “I’m Spike, what’s your name?”

She flashed him a bright smile, wondering just how he got a name like that and very determined to find out. “Harmony Kendall, it’s nice to meet you.”

Chapter 8

“If you’re going to be staying here, there has to be some rules. For one, you won’t be allowed to kill. I’ll go to the butcher’s and get some pig’s blood for you, but that’s it.”

Harmony scoffed. “God, what kind of vampire are you?” At the serious expression on his face, she rolled her eyes. “It’s not like I can kill, anyway. I told you about the experiments in that place, they put some sort of thingy in my head. A chip, I think they called it. If I hurt anyone, or even think about it, my head gets zapped. It’s not fun,” she finished with a pout.

Spike didn’t understand why the soldiers couldn’t just kill demons, doing experiments was much crueler than killing. And these were supposed to be the good guys? What made him feel even more dread was that one soldier boy’s interest in Buffy. From what she told him, the bloke hadn’t confronted her again since their last so-called date, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t.

“So, what do you do for fun around here? I like this crypt, it seems really comfortable. Much better than the hole I was living in,” she said with a little moue of distaste.

Spike rubbed his temples. “Um, well, there’s a telly if you get bored. There’s not much else to do. My room is downstairs.”

She raised her eyebrows in a suggestive manner, and he decided to clarify.

“Which is off limits, you’ll be staying up here.”

Harmony pouted again, but accepted his answer. Besides, she was bound to get him to change his mind. No man could resist her for too long.


* * * * *


Buffy entered Spike’s crypt, surprised to hear another voice inside, a female voice.

“Oh my God, Buffy Summers? What the hell are you doing here?”

She stopped at the screeching voice, her eyes widening. “Harmony?”

Spike rubbed the back of his neck. “Oh, I guess you two know each other.”

Harmony rolled her eyes. “Hardly, I only went to school with the freak. Don’t tell me you two are friends? You’re so much cooler than she is.”

Spike glared at her, turning back to Buffy. “The Initiative was after her, that secret organization of yours. I saved her life and brought her back here, she didn’t really have anywhere else to go.”

Buffy grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the crypt, so they could have some privacy. “Are you kidding me? This is Harmony, she can’t stay here. She’s pure evil, and now to find out she’s a vampire? I don’t want her anywhere near you. There are plenty of other crypts for her to stay in.”

Spike smiled softly. “Love, I can’t just kick her out. I feel sorry for the bint, she hasn’t been a vampire for too long and her sire ditched her. She doesn’t really have anyone else to teach her. You don’t have to worry about her killing; the soldiers put a chip in her head. It prevents her from hurting anyone. You can’t imagine what it’s like to still be newly turned and not able to kill, the bloodlust alone could drive you crazy. I feel for her.”

Buffy crossed her arms over her chest. “There’s a reason why her sire left, because she is the most annoying person ever, even more so in death. I don’t like this.”

Spike wondered if Buffy’s attitude had anything to do with jealousy, but he wouldn’t read too much into it. “It’s only temporary, until she gets back on her feet. You’ll hardly even notice her.”

A crash sounded from inside the crypt, followed by an “oops, my bad.”

Buffy raised her eyebrows. “Fine, but when your place gets completely trashed, don’t come crying to me.”

Spike watched her walk away, shutting his eyes and heading back inside the crypt, wondering if he would end up regretting this.


* * * * *


Buffy was beyond pissed when Harmony tagged along with them on patrol. It was their time; she hardly ever got any time to spend with him anymore since she was around. The last thing she wanted was some unwanted third party, and she hated all the little touches that Harmony would give Spike. Even more, she hated that it bothered her. Spike was just a friend, or so she kept telling herself. He hadn’t mentioned anything else about loving her, not since the first time he said it and Buffy was starting to wonder if maybe he didn’t feel that way anymore. She kicked a pebble on the ground, suddenly finding it to be fascinating.

Spike nudged her shoulder. “You okay?” he wondered with concern.

She laughed humorlessly. “I’m surprised you even noticed that I was here.”

Spike was confused, but anything else he would have said was cut off at the arrival of two Fyarl Demons.

Buffy grinned. “Finally, I get to kill something.” She charged at the one on the left, watching as Spike took on the other.

Harmony watched them both with interest, noticing just how evenly matched their moves were.

Buffy was thrown into a nearby tombstone; while Spike growled and snapped the neck of the one he was fighting, not noticing that the other one left Buffy alone to go after Harmony.

She screamed and backed up into a mausoleum, the demon slashing her across the arm.

Spike yanked it away from her, snapping its neck just like he did with the other one. He inspected the bloody gash on her arm, giving her a smile. “You’ll be fine, it’s just a scratch. Luckily it’s not poisonous; you only would have needed to worry if it sneezed on you.”

Harmony scrunched up her nose, giving him a hug for saving her again.

Buffy stood up and watched them, noticing that Spike went over to Harmony first, not even caring to see if she was all right. Sure, the demon only stunned her, but some consideration would have been appreciated. She suddenly had to get out of there, taking off in the opposite direction.

Spike noticed her leave, confused again about what just happened. “Wait here,” he told Harmony, then followed after Buffy. He caught her right as she was leaving the cemetery. “Hey, where are you going?”

“I have to get home; I didn’t feel like breaking up the tender moment between you two. You probably shouldn’t leave her alone.”

Spike grabbed her arm, pulling her around to face him. “What’s that about?”

She threw her hands up in the air. “I don’t even know, okay? I know we’re just friends, so I have no right to be upset, but I just can’t stand seeing you with her. It makes me physically ill and I don’t understand it. I just hate the idea of you with someone else. It bothers me a lot more than I thought it would.”

“Right, so it’s okay for me to have feelings for you, but for no one else? Yet you can go out with whomever you please, and I’m just supposed to accept it? That doesn’t seem bloody fair.”

Buffy took a deep breath, trying not to cry. That could wait for when she was alone. “I know it doesn’t. I guess I was just hoping that when I was finally ready, you would still be there. I didn’t think about the possibility of you falling for someone else.”

“How could you even think that, Buffy? Do you have any idea of what I’ve done for you?” He shut his eyes, cursing himself for nearly revealing too much.

“What are you talking about?”

Spike shook his head. “It’s not important right now. You know how I feel about Abrams being in your life. That I hate the idea of him anywhere near you or Dawn, but he is her father, so I’ve tried to deal with him being around you, even though it’s killing me. I like to think that I have a lot of patience, Buffy, but I don’t know how much more I can take. Think about that when you’re trying to reprimand me for being with someone else.”

She watched him walk away, not able to keep the tears back any longer.

Chapter 9

Buffy couldn’t get any sleep all night, knowing that she had to apologize to Spike. She hated when he was mad at her, especially over something so stupid. It was ridiculous of her to be jealous of him spending time with Harmony. She understood that Spike only felt sorry for the female vampire, he could never actually fall for someone like her. Buffy quietly entered the crypt, assuming that he was asleep since it was daylight out, but she couldn’t wait any longer to talk to him. A quick look around had her worried when she didn’t spot Harmony anywhere, but then figured that maybe he finally came to his senses and kicked her out. With that thought in mind, she headed down to the lower level, gasping in shock at the sight before her.

Spike was lying in bed with Harmony, both sound asleep. He was turned away from her, but the blonde had her arm draped over his naked back. Buffy couldn’t take anymore and ran out of there, not looking back once.


* * * * *


Spike awoke from yet another fantasy of his Golden Goddess, but when he turned over, it wasn’t the blonde he was hoping to see. He shot out of bed, noticing that his movement seemed to have woken her as well.

“What the fuck are you doing in here?”

Harmony stretched, giving him a seductive smile. “I was lonely up there by myself, and it looks really comfortable down here. I didn’t think you would mind, you were so sweet to me last night.”

He groaned. “That didn’t mean anything, you irritating bint. I told you this part of the crypt was off limits; I’m not interested in you.”

She pouted. “It’s Buffy, isn’t it? What could you possibly see in her? She kills our kind, and she was an even bigger freak in high school.”

Spike was about to make a retort, when he suddenly caught a familiar scent in the air. He immediately knew what it was. “Bloody hell, she was here. She must have seen,” his voice trailed off as he shut his eyes, opening them a moment later to glare at her. “That girl means more to me than anything in this world and if I lose her because of you, I won’t hesitate to put a stake through your heart. I want you gone when I get back,” he spat as he quickly got dressed, then hurried out of the crypt.


* * * * *


“Is she here?”

Joyce sighed and let him into the house. “Upstairs, she’s very upset right now.”

Spike nodded. “I’m sure she told you about what happened, but you have to understand, it wasn’t what it looked like. That bloody bitch snuck into my bed, I didn’t even know she was there. Believe me; I know what that sounds like…”

Joyce held up her hand, cutting him off. “I can honestly say that I have no idea what you’re talking about. Buffy’s upset about Parker; I thought that was why she went over to your place this morning. I guess she didn’t tell you.”

Spike shook his head, now more concerned about what that wanker could have done to her. He ran up the stairs, knocking softly on Buffy’s door and letting himself in when there was no answer. He found her lying in bed, clutching her stuffed pig to her chest. She looked so young and innocent, which made him want to protect her all the more. He joined her on the bed, not knowing how to start a conversation. “What happened?” he began, figuring that was good enough.

Buffy took in a deep breath, sitting up and giving him a look. She showed him a piece of paper, watching the mixed emotions that clouded his features when he read it. “He took off last night, left this at the door. I knew Parker wouldn’t be able to handle being a father, but to just leave like that? I should be used to guys leaving town by now, but what am I going to tell Dawn when she gets older? That her father just walked out on her? She’ll be heartbroken.”

Spike shook his head, crumbling up the paper and throwing it into her garbage can. “No, she won’t. As far as Dawn will know, I’m her father. I’m not going anywhere.”

Buffy wiped her eyes, not even realizing that she was crying. “How do I know that? I saw you with Harmony. I went over there to apologize for last night, and I saw you with her. There I was trying to convince myself that you would never fall for someone like that. I feel so stupid.”

“It didn’t mean anything, Buffy. She snuck in my bed while I was sleeping, I didn’t even know she was there and as soon as I woke up, I told her to get lost. If she knows what’s good for her, she won’t be there when I get back.”

Buffy breathed a sigh of relief. “Really?”

He smiled. “Of course, why would I ever choose that halfwit over you?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know, I guess I just let my insecurities get the best of me. Parker leaving was pretty much the last thing I could take, even though a part of me saw it coming.”

“He’s a bloody git, and he’s going to regret it for the rest of his life. Honestly, I think you’re both better off without him.”

Buffy had to agree with that, but he wasn’t finished.

“I know I haven’t said it for a while now, but I love you. It’s important that you never forget that, all right? I came back here for you and I understand that you’re not ready yet; I meant it when I said I would wait for as long as you needed.”

Buffy pressed her lips to his; effectively cutting off anything else he would have said. “I think I’m ready now,” she whispered against his mouth, kissing his lips sweetly once again.

Spike wrapped his arms around her, turning the kiss more passionate, not letting go until breathing became an issue. He touched his forehead to hers, a genuine smile on his face. “So, does this mean I can call you my girlfriend now? The whole friend thing is great, but it was bloody torture.”

She laughed. “Sure, if you don’t mind having a very insecure girlfriend, who has a habit of running men out of town.”

“Not this time, love. I’m here for the long haul.”

She smiled, kissing him again. “I could definitely live with that.”

Chapter 10

They spent the next half hour kissing on her bed, both lost in a tender embrace. When she felt just how affected he was by their groping, Buffy pulled away.

“As much fun as this is, I think we should slow things down. I’m not ready for us to go too far yet.”

Spike nodded, running his fingers through his hair. “I understand, it’ll be hard for me to keep my hands to myself, but I understand.”

Buffy grinned. “Well, I didn’t say you had to do that.” She grabbed his shirt, planting a firm kiss on his lips, which he eagerly returned.

Spike took her bottom lip into his mouth, sucking on it. When she took in a deep breath, he spread kisses to her nose, cheek, then reached her smooth neck.

Buffy threw her head back, giving him better access.

Spike suckled her neck, biting lightly with his blunt teeth, inhaling her sweet scent as he buried his face against her throat. “God, I love you.”

Buffy gasped at the feel of his tongue now on her heated skin, still not sure how to respond to that sentiment.

Spike sensed the increase in her heart rate, pulling away to look at her. “I’m not expecting for you to say it back, Buffy. I just want you to know.”

Buffy caressed his cheek. “I do,” she whispered, capturing his lips once again, this time going slower. She wanted to say the words so badly, but still wasn’t sure about what she was feeling. Buffy knew that she cared deeply for him and for now, that would just have to be enough.


* * * * *


“Wow, someone sure is happy. You’ve had a big smile on your face ever since you walked in, which is odd since you hate this class.”

Buffy glanced over at Willow, a shy expression overtaking her features. “I can’t help it.”

Willow nodded. “I take it things are going well with Spike, then. I never thought I would actually say this about a vampire, but he’s been really sweet since he got back to town. The Parker thing aside, which I still think was pretty great, but not the point. It’s obvious to anyone with eyes that Spike is completely in love with you.”

Buffy blushed. “I know, and I think I might be in love with him, too. I’m just scared to tell him. I don’t even know why, I guess I’m still worried to put my heart on the line like that again. I do believe Spike when he says he’s here for the long haul, but it’s not only me that I need to think about. Dawn is just as much involved, I don’t want her to get too attached, just in case Spike does end up realizing this isn’t what he wants.”

Willow shook her head. “Somehow, I don’t think you need to worry about that.”

Buffy really hoped that her friend was right. She handled losing Angel, and Parker was hardly anyone to cry over, but if she lost Spike, Buffy was afraid that she would never recover.


* * * * *


“Get back here, Slayer!” the vampire yelled, chasing her along the shore.

Buffy laughed as he finally caught up to her, twirling her around, which caused him to lose his balance and fall onto the sand, taking her down with him.

She was breathing heavily as she gazed up at the vampire now laying on top of her, the bright sun shining down on them.

“Told you I wouldn’t let you get away,” Spike stated, trailing his finger down her cheek.

Buffy pulled him closer to her, smashing her lips to his.

Spike moved off of her a moment later, helping her up as well, then walked hand in hand down the beach, which was surprisingly empty for a Saturday afternoon.

“I like this, having a normal walk with my boyfriend in the sunlight.”

He felt warmth at those words. “It’s nice, but you know I’ll never really be normal.”

Buffy shrugged. “Normal’s highly overrated, anyway. This is all I need,” she responded, wrapping an arm around his waist.

Spike hugged her to him, finding a nice spot to sit down and just gaze at the ocean. “As much as I love getting to come here during the day, we should come late at night. Do a little skinny dipping,” he said with a leer.

Buffy swatted him across the chest. “No way, I don’t wanna risk anyone seeing me naked.”

“True, I’m the only one who will get that privilege.”

She relaxed against his chest, resting her head on his shoulder. “Do you think you’ll actually tan?”

He chuckled. “I doubt it, but I wouldn’t mind finding out.”

“I could stay like this forever,” she claimed softly, shutting her eyes in pure bliss.

Spike held her close, pressing a kiss to her neck, noticing how his touch made her shiver. She was so young and literally had the weight of the world on her shoulders, but for right now, she could rest knowing that she would be protected and cherished for the rest of her life. And it would be a long one, if he had anything to say about it.


* * * * *


“Hey, Buffy, how have you been?”

She turned at the voice, giving Riley a small smile. “Good, and you?”

He nodded. “I’m doing okay, but I was wondering if you’ve reconsidered what we talked about. I really think you would be a great addition to the Initiative. We’re both on the same side here; you shouldn’t have to fight demons by yourself. That’s no job for a woman to do on her own.”

Buffy crossed her arms over her chest. “Tell me, Riley, just how long have you been fighting demons?”

He thought about it. “I don’t know, I guess for about a year now.”

“Yeah, I’ve been doing it since I was fifteen. I think I have a bit more experience than you do. Sorry, but I work alone. I don’t trust your organization, what you’re doing is wrong and I’m going to find a way to put a stop to it.”

“What are you talking about?” he wondered in confusion.

She rolled her eyes. “I know you don’t just kill demons. You capture them for testing, then put some sort of chip in their head to make them harmless. It’s cruel, if a demon is deadly, you should just kill it. What happens if one of your so-called test dummies gets loose? What’s to stop them from finding a way to get the chip out of their head? I know Professor Walsh is the one behind the operation, I wonder what the school board would think.”

His eyes widened. “I don’t know how you found out about that, but you’ve got it all wrong. We’re helping people, making this town a safer place. If a hostile does escape, there’s no way for them to get the chip out. It’s only programmed to last temporarily, anyway.”

“So, what, it eventually kills them? Right, that’s so much better than what I’m doing. We’re done here.”

Riley watched her walk away, knowing that Professor Walsh would have to be informed about Buffy Summers. She could be a problem after all.

Chapter 11

“I don’t like this. What if they come after you now?”

Buffy rolled her eyes. “Why would they come after me? I’m not a demon.”

Spike shrugged. “Because now you know too much, they might not care if you’re a demon or not. I don’t want you going anywhere by yourself, and you should stick with Willow at all times when you’re on campus.”

“Spike, I’m a big girl, not to mention the Slayer. I can handle myself; I don’t need you to protect me.”

He nodded, knowing that she always hated when Angel would be too overprotective, but he couldn’t help wanting to keep her safe. “Just from hearing about what goes on in that place, I don’t want you anywhere near it.”

She wrapped her arms around his waist. “I like that you’re worried about me, but I’ll be fine. If they do come after me, they’re gonna find out just how strong I really am.”

That gave Spike some reassurance, but not enough to stop the feeling of dread that went through him.


* * * * *


“We have to find a way to put a stop to them, Watcher. I don’t like that Finn bloke sniffing around my girl; he’s a little too interested.”

Giles raised his eyebrows. “Yes, and are you sure this has nothing to do with jealousy?”

Spike rolled his eyes. “It’s more than that, all right? She was asked to join their team, I have a feeling they won’t take too kindly to her rejection, especially now that they know she plans to end their organization. Maybe it’s time that Ripper came out; scare the bitch in charge or something.”

“As much as I would love to, I doubt there’s much I can do. It’ll probably take more than a retired librarian to get her to shut the Initiative down, but that’s not why you’re here. Have you told Buffy of your situation yet?”

Spike averted his eyes from the man’s curious stare. “It hasn’t exactly come up, but I’m planning on it.”

Giles nodded. “And just when is that? Buffy doesn’t like when the men in her life keep secrets from her and since you have entrusted me with this new information, I am now one of them. She has a right to know, Spike. You can’t keep something like this a secret forever.”

“I won’t, this just isn’t the right time. The Initiative should be our main priority right now, everything else can wait.”

Giles agreed, even though a part of him believed that the longer they kept the truth from Buffy, the worst things were going to get.


* * * * *


Buffy knew that she probably shouldn’t be patrolling alone that night, but she didn’t need a bodyguard. Spike would just have to deal. A scream had her running into the nearest cemetery, only to find Harmony on the ground, three soldiers over her with guns raised. She rolled her eyes and attacked the one nearest to Harmony, throwing him away from the blonde, and sending her a glare.

“I don’t even know why I’m helping you, but I suggest you get lost.”

Harmony wasn’t one to be told twice and took off in the opposite direction.

Buffy suddenly felt a bolt of electricity surge through her as she fell to the ground, feeling paralyzed from the blast.

“You were right about her, Finn, she protects vampires. I guess she’s not one of us, after all.”

He sighed, shaking his head in disappointment. “Grab her; we should take her back to Maggie. She’ll want to do the tests right away.”

A growl sounded through the night as two of the soldiers were flung away from the girl.

Riley turned to see the same bleached vampire that they had been trying to catch. He raised his gun, but it flew out of his hand as he went flying into a nearby tombstone.

Spike ran to Buffy’s side, kneeling down beside her and seeing that she couldn’t move. “Come on, love, let’s get you out of here.” He gently picked her up and carried her out of the cemetery.


* * * * *


“Do you believe me now? Those wankers tried to capture her.”

Giles cleaned his glasses, glancing over at the still form of Buffy on his couch. “Will she be all right?”

Spike nodded. “They only stunned her, according to Harmony; it wears off in a couple of hours. If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s seeing my Slayer helpless. I don’t care if I have to kill every single one of those soldiers, I’ll do it to keep her safe. They’re not going to stop coming after her now.”

“Spike,” Buffy whimpered, which had him instantly moving over to her side.

“I’m right here, baby. You’re okay now,” he commented, running his fingers through her hair soothingly. The look on her face would have broken his heart, she looked so lost. Spike pressed a quick kiss to her forehead, turning back to the other man in the room. “We have to do something, Watcher. We have to burn that bloody place to the ground.”

Giles hoped there was another way, but he didn’t see any other options. Besides, it wasn’t like he’d never blown up a building before.


* * * * *


Spike bounced the giggling child on his knee, feeling charmed by her sweet innocence.

“You’re gonna grow up to be a knock out, I can already tell, but no dating until you’re thirty.”

Joyce smiled. “Good luck with that, she is Buffy’s daughter.”

He agreed. “Yeah, that’s what worries me.”

“Hey, I wasn’t that bad!”

Spike grinned up at the vision on the staircase, in her adorable yummy sushi pajamas. “How are you feeling, love? You should be resting.”

Buffy waved her hand in the air, moving to sit next to Spike on the couch. “I feel better now; I can’t stay in bed all day.” She took the baby from him, holding her close and giving her a kiss on the cheek. “It makes me sick to think that I could have been taken away from her. Riley knows I have a daughter, and that didn’t stop him from trying to abduct me. All he cares about is finding out what makes me tick, and I doubt I would even be in this situation if I didn’t reject his offer to join them in the first place. Not that I regret that decision, but I’m really getting tired of every man in my life turning evil. At least I know you don’t have a soul to lose, not that it makes much of a difference. Both Parker and Riley have souls, and look what good that’s done.”

Spike rubbed the back of his neck. “Right, well, even so, my feelings for you wouldn’t change.”

Buffy flashed him a smile. “I know, and that’s very comforting right now.” She rested her head against his shoulder, feeling content when he wrapped an arm around her. With or without a soul, Buffy knew that Spike would never abandon her.

Chapter 12

Buffy hadn’t seen much of Riley in the upcoming weeks, and wouldn’t go anywhere by herself, just to be on the safe side. Except the one time when she thought it might be safe, was the one time it wasn’t. Her arm was suddenly grabbed in a firm grip as she was pulled into an empty classroom.

“What the hell are you doing?” she spat, ripping her arm out of his grasp.

“We needed to talk in private.”

Buffy glared at him. “We don’t need to do anything. You tried to capture me, Riley. You were going to treat me like some lab rat.”

He nodded, feeling slightly ashamed for his actions. “I’m sorry about that, but I didn’t know what else to do. My men expected it of me; they would have been suspicious if I just let you go. I’m finally ready for the truth, Buffy. What are you?”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Capricorn on the cusp of Aquarius. You?”

“Sorry, that came out a little blunter than I intended. I just need to know what I’m dealing with here,” he wondered.

“I thought a professional demon chaser like yourself would have figured it out by now. I’m the Slayer.”

Riley raised his eyebrows in confusion.

“Slay-er? Chosen One?”

He looked at her like she was crazy.

“She who hangs out a lot in cemeteries? You’re kidding.”

Riley only shrugged, which had her rolling her eyes.

“Ask around. Look it up: Slayer comma the.”

Riley finally nodded. “And you fight demons? If that was the case, why did you protect that hostile?”

“Moment of weakness, I don’t know. Harmony is a pathetic creature, even more so in death than she was in life, but I know her. Whether I like her or not, I couldn’t let your team take her again, but I’m sure I will end up regretting it.”

That wasn’t what Riley expected to hear. “And the vampire who saved you? I’ve done my research. William the Bloody is a powerful and vicious monster. Yet it seems like to me that you two are on the same side.”

Buffy gave him a look that could kill. “He’s mine, and not to be touched by you or anyone else from the Initiative. Spike is different now, he’s been helping me and he means no harm to anyone. Although, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t mind taking you guys out of the picture. If you haven’t noticed, Spike is very protective of me.”

“Wait, you’re the Slayer? That’s supposed to be a myth.”

Buffy couldn’t believe how slow this guy was. “Obviously not, since I’m standing right here. Are we done now? You know I’m not a demon, but somehow I doubt your boss is going to care about that. What you’re doing is wrong, Riley. I really hope you figure that out before it’s too late.”

Riley watched her leave, taking her words in to consideration.


* * * * *


“Did you have to talk to the wanker? I don’t like the idea of you alone with him.”

Buffy cuddled up at his side on the bed. “Don’t worry, I doubt Riley will try to grab me again. Now that he knows exactly who he’s dealing with. For his sake, I really hope he comes to his senses soon about that place.”

Spike agreed, trailing his lips down her neck.

She felt shivers up her spine. “Is this your way of distracting me?”

He grinned. “One of many.”

Buffy had no complaints as she turned and captured his mouth with hers.

Spike moved on top of her, pinning her arms above her head as he continued with her neck, licking and sucking at her flesh. The scent of her arousal perfumed the air, and it became too much for Spike to handle. His face changed as the demon took over, fangs protruding from his mouth and lightly puncturing her throat, taking two long pulls of her blood.

Buffy moaned as she held him to her, closing her eyes in pleasure.

Spike pulled his fangs out, licking her wound clean as his human features returned. He jerked away from her, appalled at what he just did. “I’m sorry, Buffy. I never meant to get that carried away. I…I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Buffy opened her eyes in confusion, seeing that he was suddenly sitting away from her. “You didn’t hurt me, Spike. It actually felt pretty good.”

He shook his head, mumbling something that she couldn’t make out.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” she wondered with concern.

“Never wanted to hurt you,” he claimed, tears forming in his eyes.

Buffy didn’t understand why he was so distressed, but she had a strong urge to comfort him. “It’s okay, you didn’t hurt me. It’s not like you to get so upset about one little bite. Is there something you’re not telling me?”

Spike shook his head, taking in a deep, unneeded breath as he calmed himself down. “It’s nothing; I don’t know what came over me. Sorry if I worried you.”

“That’s fine, as long as you’re okay. Don’t worry about the bite, Spike. It was kind of sexy.”

That got a small smile out of him, relieved that she didn’t hate him for what he did.

“You can feel free to do it again, if you want. You won’t get any complaints out of me.”

Spike pounced on her, gazing down in to her eyes. “That’s not a very smart thing to say to a vampire,” he said huskily, taking her bottom lip into his mouth and nibbling on it. Spike moved back to her neck, making sure to keep his fangs to himself for the time being.

Buffy turned her head, taking his earlobe into her mouth, which caused him to let out a moan.

“I love you,” she whispered.

Spike pulled away in shock, smiling at the look of sincerity in her eyes. “You mean that?”

Buffy nodded, taking in a deep breath. “Yeah, I finally have the guts to say it. Just, you can’t leave me now, okay?”

Spike hugged her to him, pressing kisses to the top of her head. “Never leave you, sweetheart. You should know that by now, you’re stuck with me.”

Buffy sighed in relief as she returned the embrace.

Spike let out his own sigh of relief. She loved him without even knowing the truth, which was all that he wanted. He knew that he could tell her now, but really hoped it would go well. A part of Spike still worried about her reaction, but when Buffy loved someone, she loved with all that she had. That was all the reassurance he needed.

Chapter 13

“Are you sure about this?”

Buffy nodded, leisurely lifting off her shirt and throwing it to the floor. “I’m very sure.”

Spike gulped, taking in the sight of her exposed chest, delighted that she wasn’t wearing a bra. “Fuck, you’re gorgeous.”

She blushed at the compliment, moving to take off her skirt, until he stopped her.

“I’ll do that,” he whispered, gently pushing her to lie down on the bed.

Buffy watched in eager anticipation as he removed his clothing, not stopping until he was completely naked before her. She licked her lips, never before having seen such a perfect male specimen.

They were in his crypt, since Joyce had agreed to watch Dawn for the night, giving them some much needed alone time.

Spike lowered his body to hers, nuzzling her nose and taking her bottom lip into his mouth.

Buffy moaned when she felt his cold hands on her stomach, sliding her skirt off in one quick movement, giving her a rakish grin.

“No knickers, either? I’m very impressed.”

She shrugged. “They just get in the way.”

He chuckled. “You won’t get any complaints from me, sweetheart. If I had my way, you’d never wear knickers again.”

Buffy laughed, which turned into a gasp as he took her left nipple into his mouth, firmly sucking on it. She ran her fingers through his soft hair, closing her eyes in rapture.

Spike smothered her breasts with kisses, lowering his lips to her stomach, and lingering there for a moment. “It’s hard to believe you’ve had life growing in here. You’re so bloody tiny.”

“Good thing about being the Slayer, it wasn’t hard to get my figure back.”

Spike shook his head. “Somehow, I doubt your figure went anywhere.” He kissed her belly, tonguing her navel and smiling at the sound of her giggles. He always knew his Slayer was ticklish.

Buffy took a deep breath as his mouth moved lower, panicking when he spread her legs wider.

Spike felt her tense up, gazing into her eyes as he covered her mound with his hand. “Have you ever been tasted here before?”

She nodded, averting her stare from his. “Parker, he, uh, tried it once, but he said I didn’t taste good.”

Spike growled, wishing the boy was still in town, the flagpole wasn’t enough for that moron. “He’s a fucking git, love. I already know you’ll taste delicious, he’s a bigger idiot than I thought.”

“You don’t have to do it, Spike. I know some guys don’t like doing that.”

He smiled. “Something you need to know about me, baby. I’m not like most guys.”

Oh, she knew that very well, she thought, throwing her head back as his tongue invaded her entrance. “My God,” she gasped out.

“Been called many things in my life,” he responded, continuing to feast on her pussy, collecting all of the juices that gushed out of her. “Yeah, fucking idiot, you taste like honey. It’s the best bloody thing that I’ve ever had in my mouth.”

Buffy had to admit, he was really good on a woman’s ego. “Spike, fuck, I won’t be able to last much longer.”

He grinned up at her. “Let yourself go, pet. I’ll catch you.”

She did just that, crying out as her orgasm hit.

Spike drank every drop of her cum down, not letting any of it go to waste. Once finished, he gazed up at Buffy to see the sated expression on her face. “Ready for more?”

Buffy nodded when she finally got her breathing under control. “I have all night.”

He prowled up her body, giving her a peck on the lips. “You sure you want this with me, Buffy?”

She didn’t hesitate with her answer. “I love you, Spike. I won’t have any regrets.”

He would not tear up. No, it wasn’t going to happen this time. Instead, he tenderly kissed her lips, moving his hand to her pussy and sliding two fingers inside, making sure she was still good and wet.

Buffy arched her back, giving him better access to her core.

When Spike felt that she was ready, he positioned his cock at her entrance and slowly pushed inside, never removing his mouth from hers. Spike pumped in and out of her, keeping a slow rhythm, until she would no longer stand it.

“Harder, Spike, you won’t hurt me.”

He was happy to oblige as he thrust harder and faster into her cunny, burying his head in her neck. Her blood called to him, but he wouldn’t allow himself to bite her again.

Buffy could tell what he was thinking, trailing her hands down his back. “It’s okay, I want you to.”

Spike shook his head, glancing up at her. “I don’t want to lose control with you.”

She smiled. “You won’t. I trust you, Spike. I know that you would never hurt me.”

He lowered his head back to her throat; licking the sweat from her flesh as his face changed, fangs gently penetrating her neck.

Buffy moaned, holding him closer to her.

Spike felt the bloodlust trying to take over as he drank her blood, but he squashed it down, being careful not to take too much. He sensed her walls fluttering around him when she came, and he removed his fangs and licked the wound closed, before yelling out his release right behind her, moving off of her after a moment.

They both lay there panting hard, even though he didn’t need to.

Spike turned to her, brushing the sweaty hair off of her face. “You’re so bloody amazing.”

Buffy blushed again, her last two partners leaving her miserable afterwards, but she knew Spike would be different.

“I love you so much,” he whispered.

She gazed into his eyes, feeling that her heart might burst out of her chest. “I love you, too.”

It wasn’t long before they both fell into a peaceful slumber.


* * * * *


“Can you believe this guy? That is not how real vampires act.”

Spike chuckled, cuddling her closer to him. “It’s an old movie, love. They get everything wrong about us.”

Buffy scrunched up her nose. “It’s just not right.”

Spike smiled fondly at her, knowing that he could really get used to this. Buffy was snuggled up in his chair with him, watching some old horror movies. It was perfect, but all good things must come to an end.

The crypt door burst open, both turning to the entrance to see a very agitated blonde vampire.

“Bloody hell, does no one knock? What the fuck are you doing back here, Harmony?”

Her eyes widened at the sight of them so cozy together, but she quickly got to the point. “You have to hide me. I don’t have anywhere to go since you kicked me out; those soldier guys are still after me.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Can you possibly go one night without nearly being captured?”

“I didn’t actually see them, but I know they’re out there. Please, can I just stay here for a little while? I promise not to try and seduce you again, since I see you’re already with her. She saved my life and all, so I won’t do anything to get in your way. You won’t even know I’m here.”

Spike groaned. “Just go downstairs, I’ll deal with you later.”

Harmony raised her eyebrows. “I thought I wasn’t allowed down there?”

“Only when I’m down there; right now, I don’t want you up here.”

She quickly nodded and hurried to the lower level, leaving them to their privacy.

Spike turned back to the girl on his lap. “What do you think?”

Buffy shrugged. “I don’t like the idea of her being here, especially after last time, but I trust you. We should probably keep an eye on her, but we seriously need to find her another crypt.”

Spike chuckled, kissing her forehead. “First thing tomorrow night, we’ll go crypt hunting. Do you really think the soldiers are still after her?”

“I don’t know, it didn’t seem like Riley would bother with her anymore after our last conversation, but I haven’t seen much of him lately. I was hoping he would have come to his senses by now,” she finished with a pout.

“He’s been in this for too long, love. The wanker thinks he’s doing the right thing, it’ll probably take a lot more for him to ever reconsider his actions.”

Buffy nodded, knowing that he was probably right.

They heard something crashing downstairs, causing Spike to let out another groan.

“I’m going to fucking kill that bint.”

Chapter 14

“I want her gone, Spike. It was supposed to be one night only, and she’s been here for two weeks.”

He nodded in agreement. “You don’t think I’ve tried? I must have shown her a million crypts, and she managed to find something wrong with every single one of them.”

Buffy rolled her eyes. “This is your place; you can just kick her out like you did last time. It’s not your responsibility to find her somewhere to live.”

“I know, and I don’t intend to deal with her for much longer. You’re getting awfully upset about this, love. Jealous, are you?”

She scoffed. “Please, I’m so not jealous of Harmony. I just don’t like that my boyfriend is living with another woman, especially one who gets on my last nerves. I don’t know how you’ve put up with her for this long.”

“Lots of patience and alcohol,” he explained.

Buffy grinned, trailing her hands down his chest. “Well, we’re alone now. I guess we should make the best of it.”

Spike matched her grin with one of his own, wrapping his arms firmly around her and planting a hard, passionate kiss to her mouth. He slipped his hand under her shirt, caressing the smooth skin of her stomach, groaning in irritation when the crypt door crashed open.

“Oops, sorry, didn’t know you were busy. Don’t mind me, I’m not even here.”

Spike cursed under his breath when Harmony tried to hurry downstairs, bumping into his telly along the way.

“My bad,” she said sheepishly, continuing on her way to the lower level.

Buffy gave him a pointed look.

“All right, she’ll be gone by the end of the day.”


* * * * *


“Yes, finally, peace and quiet.”

Spike laughed as he joined his girl on the bed. “Putting her up in the old mansion, I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before. That’s just Harmony’s type, and it gives me a reason to never visit. I bloody hate that place.”

Buffy had to agree with that, neither one of them having very good memories there.

“Now that we’re alone,” he stated and placed her on his waist, so she was straddling him. “What are we going to do?”

Buffy nudged his erection with her hand, causing his eyes to roll back in his head.

“Fuck, yeah, good plan that.”

Their clothes were off in an instant and Buffy crawled back on top of him.

“You gonna ride me, baby?” Spike wondered with his trademark smirk.

Instead of answering, she decided to do just that, sitting astride his lap and positioning him at her opening, before impaling herself on his dick, shuddering as he filled her oh so completely.

Spike groaned when he was once again buried inside Buffy’s warm pussy, never feeling anything like it before.

She bounced up and down on his cock, throwing her head back in rapture.

He rested his hands around her waist, thrusting up into her wet channel. “Bloody fuck!” he roared as they both came undone.

Buffy buried her head against his neck, trying to get her breathing under control. “I don’t think I can feel my legs.”

Spike chuckled. “Mission accomplished, then.”

He was way too cocky for his own good, so Buffy shut him up by nibbling on his earlobe, knowing that was a sensitive spot for him.

Spike growled and changed their positions, so he was now the one on top. “I think it’s safe to say that we won’t be leaving this bed for a long time.”

All she did was smile, having no complaints about that.


* * * * *


“Why do I have to bond with the guy? We’re not even friends.”

Buffy let out a sigh. “That’s the point, Xander. Everyone else has at least been trying to make some sort of effort when it comes to Spike, but you’ve hardly said anything to him since he’s been back. You’re always going on about how you want another guy in the group, so this is your chance.”

He shook his head. “A really old, undead guy is not exactly what I had in mind. I’ve decided to accept him because you’re together, but I don’t see why I have to actually get along with him.”

“You’re right, and it means a lot that you’re accepting him. I guess I shouldn’t expect any more than that.”

Xander hated the hurt look on his friend’s face, even more so knowing that he was the one who put it there. “Okay, I’m not promising anything, but maybe I’ll let him join me in a game of pool or something.”

She smiled. “That’s all I ask.”

Spike made it back to the table with their drinks, wondering what could have caused the happy expression on Buffy’s face. “Where have Red and Glinda gone?”

Buffy pointed to the dance floor. “Making all those boys crazy,” she said with a pout. “That used to be me.”

He had an urge to kiss the pout right off of her face, but restrained himself. “You can go, but if one of those blokes gets a little too friendly, I’ll break his arms off.”

Buffy flashed him a smile. “Aww, that’s so sweet.” She stood up and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, then made her way to the dance floor.

Spike was now left alone with Xander, neither knowing what to say to the other.

Xander cleared his throat. “So, you wanna play pool?”

Spike raised his eyebrows, shrugging after a moment. “Yeah, sure.”

Not the most excited reaction in the world, but it was a start.


* * * * *


Things had been going great lately. There’d been no sign of the soldiers, Harmony was officially out of the picture, and Xander was somewhat getting along with Spike. If Buffy didn’t know any better, she would say that the end of the world was near, hoping she didn’t jinx herself just by thinking it.

Spike stopped in his tracks suddenly. They were almost at his crypt, but something didn’t feel right. He sensed a familiar presence close by, a presence that he never thought he’d feel again.

“What’s wrong?” Buffy wondered with concern.

“I think we have company. You can come out now, I know you’re there.”

Buffy had no idea who he was talking to, but when the dark haired beauty stepped out from the shadows, she felt a chill up her spine.

“My Spike has found his sunshine. He doesn’t need his princess anymore,” she claimed, trailing a dead rose down her cheek.

“What are you doing here, Drusilla?”

She grinned. “I came to make everything all better.”

Spike felt Buffy’s hand grip his even tighter, looking down to notice the fear on her face. “As you can see, everything is just fine. You shouldn’t be here.”

Drusilla moved closer to them, giving Spike a look. “Yes, you did it; the pixies whispered it to me. You have the spark in you.”

His eyes widened at what she was implying, taking a step back and pulling Buffy with him.

Buffy was confused, glancing over at him. “What is she talking about?”

Spike shook his head. “It’s nothing, baby. Let’s just get out of here,” he responded, pulling her in the other direction and not looking back at his ex once.

Chapter 15

“Spike, slow down, what’s going on?”

He stopped, turning to face her. “Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting to see Dru here.”

She nodded. “I noticed, that’s not exactly how I thought things would go if she ever came back.”

“How did you think it would go?”

Buffy shrugged, avoiding his gaze. “Well, you were together for over a hundred years. I guess I always assumed that if she ever came back, you would realize that you still love her and forget about me.”

Spike couldn’t believe she thought that. “You really think I would leave you for her?”

“I don’t know what to think.”

“Then let me clarify that for you.” He took her hand, giving it a light squeeze and forcing her eyes back on his. “Loving you is like nothing I’ve ever known before, Buffy. I may have loved Drusilla at one point, but for the most part, she made me bloody miserable. Believe me; I never plan on going back to her. There is no going back after being with you.”

Buffy sighed in relief, but was still confused about something. “What did she say to freak you out so much?”

He ran his fingers through his hair, nodding after a moment. “That wasn’t exactly how I wanted you to find out, but I guess it’s time. Let’s go back to my crypt; we have a lot to talk about.”

Buffy remained silent as she followed after him, worried about what he wanted to tell her.


* * * * *


“When I realized I loved you, yeah, it took me by surprise. I was still with Drusilla at the time, hell, she practically knew before I did. We had a long talk about it, and she said that she had to let me go. That my heart would always belong to you, surprisingly; we left things on pretty good terms, which is saying a lot for her. After that, I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to come back here right away, but I knew you would never accept me. Not after the last time I was here, so I heard of this demon bloke in Africa. You go through a bunch of pretty gruesome trials and if you survive in the end, he grants you a wish. I won, and he gave me what I wanted, my soul back.”

Buffy gasped, trying to take in everything he just told her. “So, all this time, you’ve had your soul?”

Spike nodded as he continued. “I wasn’t sure how to tell you. I guess I wanted to wait until you loved me first, so I could be sure that it wasn’t just the soul that made you love me.”

“I can’t believe you went through all of that for me, Spike. How did you even know that I would let you in my life? You could have gone through all that for nothing.”

He shrugged. “I wouldn’t say for nothing, but I think I was very determined to show you how much I’ve changed. I wasn’t about to take no for an answer.”

She smiled at him. “Wow, you’re pretty amazing, you know that? I don’t know of anyone else that would willingly get a soul. Angelus never would have.”

“Bloody wanker, shouldn’t have needed the sodding soul to love you, but his loss is my gain. And then the demon told me about the Gem of Amara, the soul couldn’t give me the sunlight, so I knew I had to look for that when I got here, once I found out it actually existed. While I still can’t give you everything, I figured it was a start.”

She pressed her lips to his tenderly, resting her head against his chest, right over where his heart should be.

Spike wrapped his arms around her. “I wish it could beat for you.”

Buffy glanced up at him. “It does,” she responded, kissing him once again.


* * * * *


“Wow, that's just, wow.”

Buffy agreed. “I know, how amazing is that? Not that I think Spike needed a soul, but just the thought that he got one for me, when we were supposed to be enemies at the time, I still don't know what to think.”

Willow nodded. “It's pretty huge, but look on the bright side. Now Xander and Giles can't throw that whole 'he doesn't have a soul thing’ out there anymore.”

“True, but they've both been a bit better about him lately. I'm surprised by how much Xander is trying.”

“I'm not; you're one of his best friends. He just wants you to be happy,” Willow commented.

“I don't know what to do about Drusilla, though. Spike thinks she's in town for a reason, and it's not to get him back. At least he doesn't think so, but it makes me wonder what she's really after.”

Willow thought about it. “I don't know, maybe she just wants to give him her blessing or something.”

Buffy raised her eyebrows. “This is Drusilla we're talking about. Somehow I really doubt that.”


* * * * *


A few weeks went by and there was still no sign of Drusilla, Buffy figured that maybe she just left town, but Spike sensed that she was still around.

“Do you really think she'll hurt me?” Buffy wondered later that night.

“There's no telling what she might do. I'm worried that she hasn't made a move yet, which means she's planning something.”

Buffy sighed. “You can't know that for sure. I thought you said that things were left on good terms between you two?”

Spike nodded. “Even so, I don't trust her for a second. No woman handles rejection well, and knowing that I left her for the Slayer? Not to mention getting a soul in the process? No, she's planning something.”

They headed back to UC Sunnydale in silence, noticing a commotion coming from the college.

Buffy gasped in shock once they got there, seeing police and fire fighters everywhere, and disgruntled students waiting around until they were allowed back inside. There was a fire, which luckily didn't seem to be spreading throughout the rest of the campus. Buffy saw Riley in the distance and ran over to him. “What happened?”

He gave her a look that could only be described as lost. “The demons got loose somehow, a lot of my men were killed, including Professor Walsh. They destroyed everything, only a few of us got out alive. I didn't know what else to do, so I set the place on fire. That was the only way I could think of to get rid of them.”

Buffy couldn't believe that. While she was happy to know the Initiative was no more, that wasn't how she wanted it to happen, not at the cost of people's lives. She left his side to return to Spike, letting him know what happened.

“How do you think the demons escaped?”

She shook her head. “I don't know, but I'm going to find out.”

Chapter 16

“So, Riley and the remaining soldiers skipped town. They decided to join up with the military in Belize, or wherever. Riley said they weren’t needed here anymore, that this town already has a pretty good protector,” Buffy finished with some pride in her voice.

Spike smiled and wrapped his arms around her. “That it does, it’s kind of hard to hate the bloke after that, but at least he’s out of the picture now. It seems there’s a new player in town, someone that was able to set loose all of those demons. They must have been inside for that to happen.”

She shrugged. “Maybe it was someone that worked in the Initiative, an inside job.”

“Or, it was a pissed off demon. One could have gotten loose, then freed all the others.”

Buffy thought about that. “Possibly, or it was a pissed off demon from the outside, someone with a lot of connections.” Her eyes widened at the same time Spike’s did. “You don’t think it was Drusilla, do you?”

He nodded after some consideration. “I wouldn’t put it past her, but it doesn’t make sense. Why would she bother? Dru doesn’t exactly care for the wellbeing of other demons, unless she was captured and managed to find a way to escape, then set the others free for revenge. That would explain why we haven’t heard much from her in the last few weeks.”

“I guess that makes sense. Now I’m even more worried about her showing up, if she was able to do that.”

His hold on her tightened. “I won’t let her hurt you.”

Buffy was touched by his concern, but shook it off. “I can take care of myself.”

“I’m well aware of that, but you don’t know what she’s capable of. She’s bloody insane, and I mean that literally. I want you to be extra careful when you’re out on patrol, at least until I can manage to find her.”

Buffy knew there was no sense in arguing with him, so she just agreed and rested her head against his chest, deciding that it was time to get some sleep. She would worry about Drusilla tomorrow.


* * * * *


“Where are we going?”

He chuckled. “I told you, it’s a surprise.”

She let out a sigh. “And I told you that I hate surprises. Why do I need a blindfold? Is the surprise something kinky?”

Spike stopped to look at her. “You know, I’m trying to do something romantic here, and you’re just ruining the mood.”

“Sorry, I won’t say anything else about it,” she commented.

“Thank you, and since you’re so bloody impatient, you can remove the blindfold now. We’re here.”

Buffy did just that, taking in her surroundings to see that they were on the beach, a picnic for two prepared. “Spike, what is all this? My birthday’s not for another week.”

He took her hand, lowering her down to the blanket that he set there for them. “That would be the surprise part. I know your mates are throwing a party for you, but I wanted us to have our own little private celebration.”

“I like this idea a lot more. I don’t know why they insist on giving me a party. Buffy and birthdays tend to be unmixy, whether my boyfriend loses his soul, or I lose my strength, it’s all full of badness.”

Spike smiled, showing her the chocolate covered strawberries that he brought, knowing it was her favorite. “Well, you won’t have to worry about this boyfriend losing his soul. You never know, this year could be different.”

Buffy shrugged. “I guess last year wasn’t so bad. No major disasters, anyway.”

“See, there you go. Now, eat up.” He fed her a strawberry, feeling himself harden just from seeing her wrap her lips around the juicy fruit and suck it into her mouth. “Bloody temptress, no one should make eating fruit that erotic.”

She grinned. “I can tie a cherry stem with my tongue, too.”

He groaned. “Oh, I would pay to see that.”

“Well, since you’re my boyfriend, you get a discount.”

Spike moved closer, kissing her sweet lips. “Aren’t I a lucky bloke, then?”

She blushed at the look in his eyes, finishing up the strawberries and the rest of the goodies he brought, patting her stomach. “God, I don’t think I can eat anything else.”

“I’ll say, where do you manage to put it all?”

She flashed him another grin. “I’m a woman of many secrets.”

“Of that I have no doubts,” he responded, taking a black box out of his coat pocket. “Here, a little pre-birthday gift. You’ll get the other on your actual birthday.”

She squealed, taking the box from him and opening it up to reveal an elegant, diamond ring, her eyes widening. “Is this a proposal?”

Spike laughed, shaking his head as he placed the ring on her finger. “It’s more like a promise ring. It was my mother’s, she gave it to me as I got older, told me to give it to the woman who would steal my heart one day.”

Tears formed in her eyes at the sweet gesture. “Oh, Spike, I love it. Thank you,” she said, pressing a firm kiss to his lips.

“Only the best for my girl,” he mumbled into her hair, holding her close to him.

Buffy could already tell that this was going to be her best birthday yet.


* * * * *


It took a lot of convincing for Spike to let her patrol by herself the next night. She wasn’t going to let Drusilla intimidate her, and he had to realize that she was the Slayer. It would take a lot more than one vampire to get the best of her, but apparently, one big demon was enough as Buffy was attacked from behind, her head colliding with a tombstone. She shook away the dizziness, getting a good look at her attacker to see a huge, green demon, horns sticking out of its head, and very sharp claws.

“Didn’t your mother ever teach you that it’s not nice to sneak up on people?”

His answer was a loud growl as he swiped at her.

Buffy dodged his blow, trying not to let his claws touch her; she didn’t like the look of them.

“Can’t we talk about this?”

Talking wasn’t what the demon had in mind, though.

He kicked her legs out from under her, causing her to fall to the ground. Normally that would be nothing, Buffy could get up easily, but for some reason, she was finding it hard to move as the dizziness came back with a vengeance. She was suddenly aware of a fight going on around her, and then the cracking of what sounded like a neck.

“Poor girl, the bad demon won’t hurt my Spike’s sunshine.”

Buffy gazed up at the familiar voice. She saw a pale form standing over her with long, dark hair. Then, everything went black.

Chapter 17

Spike burst into the hospital, immediately finding her friends in the waiting room.

“What happened? Is she okay?”

Willow was the first one to speak up. “We don’t know yet. The doctor is still running some tests.”

Spike ran his fingers through his hair, taking a seat next to Xander. “I knew I shouldn’t have let her patrol alone.”

“Hey, you should know by now that no one could have stopped Buffy. This isn’t your fault,” Willow said, trying to reassure him.

He nodded, instantly jumping up when he spotted the doctor headed in their direction. “Is my girlfriend all right?”

The doctor looked at the distressed man, then at the other worried faces around him. “Are you with Buffy Summers?”

Giles stepped closer to him. “Yes, how is she doing?”

“She seems to have a head injury, but nothing too dire. The cause of her fainting is most likely from that, and from some added stress in her life. Were you aware that Ms. Summers is pregnant?”

There were shocked faces all around, but none of them were more so than Spike.

“What? No, that’s not possible.”

He nodded. “I would say about six weeks along, both her and the baby are doing fine at the moment, but I would suggest she takes it easy from now on.”

“Thank you, Doctor,” Giles told him, still not sure what to make of this new information.

Spike sat back down, at a loss for words.

“Man, and I thought Buffy being pregnant the first time was a shock. Do you think she’s been seeing someone else?”

Willow slapped Xander on the arm, while Spike sent him a scathing glare.

“No, you ponce, she hasn’t been seeing anyone else. I don’t know how it’s possible, but the baby is mine. I know it. I need to see her.” Spike headed over to her room, not about to let anyone stop him. Once there, he opened the door to see her lying very still in bed, eyes closed. The doctor didn’t say anything about her being unconscious, so he just assumed she was sleeping. It was confirmed when he took a seat next to her, and her eyes opened to look at him.

“Hey, you’re here.”

He gave her a small smile. “Of course I am, you wanna tell me what happened tonight?”

She thought about it. “My head is kind of fuzzy, but I remember Drusilla being there.”

Spike growled at that, standing up with a start. “Bloody bitch, I’ll fucking kill her!”

Buffy grabbed his arm before he could take off. “No, there was a demon that attacked me. I think Drusilla…saved me.”

He reined in his temper, sitting back down. “Are you sure?”

“It was all a blur, but yeah, she must have been the one to bring me here.”

Spike was confused, wondering if Drusilla had some sort of ulterior motive, but he couldn’t think about that now. “Has the doctor talked to you?”

Buffy nodded, glancing away from his piercing gaze. “Pregnant, huh? I’m still trying to wrap my mind around that. I didn’t know vampires could have children.”

“Neither did I.”

She turned to look back at him. “How do you feel about it?”

Spike graced her with a bigger smile. “Honestly, I’m bloody amazed right now. You’ve already given me something that I thought I would never have, but this? I love Dawn, but it kills me knowing that I’m not her real father. I just never thought I could be one.” He lay next to her on the bed, holding her close. “The demon in Africa told me that finding the gem would give me a miracle. I just assumed he meant the sunlight, but this is so much more than that.” Spike placed his hand over her still flat belly. “My baby’s really in there,” he said in awe.

She smiled at the look of adoration on his face, already knowing that he would be a great father. Seeing him with Dawn was proof of that.

“I love you so bloody much,” he commented, touching his lips to the top of her head.

“I love you, too.”


* * * * *


“Dru? I know you’re here.”

She stepped out of the shadows. “My Spike, how is the sunshine?”

He knew her well enough by now to know what she was talking about. “She’s fine. Why did you help her?”

Drusilla glided over to him. “The girl holds something precious inside of her; no harm must come to it. You’re not my William anymore, I’ve come to say goodbye.”

Spike felt tears in his eyes, knowing that this was the most sane he’d ever heard her be. “Thank you, if I’d lost her…”

She pressed a finger to his lips. “Shush now, the little one will need you. Those bad tin soldiers needed to be stopped. Don’t believe everything you hear,” with that said, she vanished back into the shadows.

Spike left the crypt, feeling lighter than he had before and knowing that she was responsible for the destruction of the Initiative, but he was going to be a father, and nothing could top that.


* * * * *


He smiled at her sleeping form, gazing at the child in his arms. “That’s your little brother or sister in there.”

Dawn giggled, even though she probably had no idea what he meant.

Buffy opened her eyes, smiling at the sight of them together. “Let me hold her.”

Spike handed the baby over to her mother, joining them both on the bed. “I have never seen your mum so thrilled. She’s already out buying baby supplies, but we don’t even know if it’s a boy or a girl yet.”

Buffy waved her hand in the air. “That doesn’t matter; she’ll buy stuff for both. I have a closet full of boys’ clothes, just in case that’s what Dawn turned out to be.” She held her baby close to her, a hand on her stomach. “At least this time around, I know my child will have a father.”

He kissed her cheek. “Damn right; they both do. Nothing will make me leave. You’re stuck with me.”

She snuggled up at his side, a satisfied smile on her face. “I could definitely live with that.”


* * * * *


“Surprise!” everyone yelled the second Buffy and Spike walked into the house. It was pointless for them to have a surprise party that she already knew about, but she didn’t want to spoil their fun.

Buffy mingled a bit, then sat down to open up her presents. Most of what her mother gave her was stuff for the baby, no matter what the sex turned out to be, but she didn’t mind. It was always good to get a head start. She received a vibrator from Anya, quickly moving to hide that from her mother, giving the other woman a glare.

Anya shrugged. “What? It’s for those times when Spike isn’t around.”

He chuckled, which caused Buffy to send a glare in his direction.

Willow and Tara got her some blouses, Giles a wicked cool knife, and Xander an offer to repair anything in her house that got broken, free of charge. With another baby on the way, there was bound to be a lot that needed repairing, so she’d be very happy to take him up on that.

Spike was last, giving her another black box.

Buffy opened it to reveal a gorgeous, heart shaped locket, with the inscription ‘love always’ on the back. She gazed up at him, tears in her eyes. “Thank you, it’s so beautiful. Could you put it on me?”

He nodded and took the necklace from her, placing it around her neck.

She went to check it out in the mirror, showing the girls her new piece of jewelry.

Xander shook his head. “You know, you’re just making the rest of us look bad. Anya’s going to expect something shiny now.”

Spike grinned, watching his girl as she laughed with her friends. When she came back over to his side, he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. “So, how does this birthday rate with the others?”

She smiled, resting her head against his shoulder. “Best birthday ever.”

Chapter 18

Buffy ignored it the first time she felt pains in her stomach. The second time was a little harder to ignore, but she kept it to herself. The third time had her clutching her abdomen in agony as she fell to the floor, which caused Spike to come running.

“Love, what’s wrong?” he asked with concern, kneeling by her side.

She shook her head. “I don’t know, but it really hurts. I think something’s wrong with the baby.”

Spike got her to the hospital as soon as he could, waiting for the doctor to tell him what was wrong. It wasn’t a long wait, and with the doctor’s words, Spike knew that nothing would be the same again.


* * * * *


“What happened? Is Buffy okay?” Willow asked in a panic.

Spike took a deep, unneeded breath as his gaze landed on all her friends. He called them to come to the house after they returned from the hospital, only wanting to say what he had to the one time, while Buffy was upstairs resting. “She’s been having some intense abdominal pains for the last few weeks, only coming clean when they got too hard for her to hide. Apparently, Buffy has this condition, I forget the medical term for it, but it means that she could hemorrhage during labor. If she goes through with it, she could die.”

Gasps sounded throughout the room at the news.

Joyce had tears in her eyes. She knew that there was a possibility of Buffy dying at a young age, but she never knew it could be like this. “What is she going to do?”

Spike ran his fingers through his hair. “She hasn’t said anything since we got home. I don’t know what she’s thinking.”

“Then let me clarify for you,” Buffy said, entering the living room. “I’m having this baby.”

“But, Buff, you could die,” Xander claimed.

“The doctor only said there was a possibility, and that’s just not good enough for me. There’s a chance I could go through with the labor and be perfectly fine. It’s a chance I’m willing to take. This baby is a part of me and Spike. It’s a miracle, probably the only child we’ll get to have together. I’m not getting rid of it, no matter what.” She glared around the room, daring anyone to argue with her as her eyes finally landed on Spike. “Don’t tell me you actually agree?”

He shook his head. “I want this baby as much as you do, but not at the cost of your life.”

“Unbelievable, well, it looks like you’re just gonna have to deal with disappointment. I’m keeping the baby, this discussion is over.”

They watched her walk away, no one knowing what to say after that.


* * * * *


Spike spent the next few days thinking about how his life had changed. He first came to Sunnydale to cure Dru, and ended up finding the one thing he never knew he wanted. Buffy was everything to him, if he lost her, he was afraid that he would be tempted to take the ring off and wait for the sun to rise. That just wasn’t an option, there was still Dawn and if Buffy wasn’t around, she would need him. He had to be there for her, but living without Buffy wasn’t something he ever wanted to experience. So, he called the one person who would possibly understand.

“Hey, it’s me, can we meet somewhere? We need to talk.”


* * * * *


“Are you still mad at me?”

Buffy glared at him. “What do you think? You basically said that you wanted me to have an abortion.”

He sat down beside her on the bed. “You know that’s not what I want. I love you, and I already love this child, but I’m always going to put you first. Just think about Dawn, think about what losing her mother would do to her, she already lost her father.”

“That is such a low blow, Spike. You’re not going to make me feel guilty about wanting to keep my child. Remember what you told me Drusilla said? Not to believe everything you hear, maybe this is what she was talking about. I’m the Slayer, I’ve dealt with way worse than this before, and I know in my heart that everything will be okay. I have to believe that.”

Spike placed a tender kiss to her forehead, holding the tears back that were threatening to come forth. “My brave girl,” he whispered, pulling away to look at her. “I have to go somewhere for a little while, but I’ll be back tomorrow morning.”

She raised her eyebrows in confusion. “Where are you going?”

“Nothing for you to worry about, I’ll tell you when I get back. You just get some rest, all right?”

Buffy was still curious, but only nodded in response.

He gave her a small smile and with a quick kiss to her lips, left the room. Spike just hoped he knew what he was doing.


* * * * *


“I’m glad you made it.”

Angel sat down in the booth across from Spike, wondering once again why they were meeting in a diner a little out of Sunnydale, but Spike refused to meet him in LA. “What’s this all about?”

Spike thought of how to start the conversation. “I know I’m probably the last person you want to see, believe me, the feeling is very mutual, but I didn’t know who else to talk to. Has anyone told you anything that’s been going on?”

“Buffy called a little while ago, told me you two were together, I think she needed closure or something. I wasn’t pleased about it, but I told her I would accept it if she was happy. Are you two not together anymore?” he wondered.

“We still are, but that’s not what this is about.” A pause. “Buffy’s pregnant with my child.”

Angel’s eyes widened. “How is that possible?”

Spike shrugged. “Still not sure on that one, we just consider it to be a miracle.”

Angel agreed. “I can understand that. Darla, she uh, came back recently and ended up pregnant with my child. His name is Connor; he’s a very healthy baby boy, looks just like his mother. Darla sacrificed herself just so he could be born.”

It was now Spike’s turn to be shocked; he never would have seen that coming. “Okay, I guess we have more in common than I thought. How do you handle it? Raising the baby on your own?”

“It was hard at first, but then I realized I’m not really doing it by myself. My friends have been a huge help, for a little while I wouldn’t even let any of them hold him, but Cordelia really came through.”

Spike sensed a little something in his grandsire’s tone at the mention of the former cheerleader, wondering if there was more going on with them, but he got back to the point. “The thing is, we got news from the doctor that Buffy could possibly die if she goes through with the birth, and you know Buffy, she’s going to do it. I want this baby so bloody much, but what if we lose her? In just a couple of months, she’s become my whole world, how can I let her go now? I know there’s a chance that everything could go fine, but what if it doesn’t? I can’t lose her.” He couldn’t stop the tears from coming now, and hated to show Angel such weakness, but was finding it hard to care at the moment.

Angel couldn’t believe this was the same vicious killer he used to know. Right now, he just looked like a distraught man who feared losing the love of his life. “Buffy’s strong, if anyone can get through this, she can. You just have to hope for the best.”

Spike nodded, wiping at his eyes. “I’m trying, but God, this is torture. How the bloody hell did you do it? I witnessed most of your relationship. You two had this whole great love going on. How were you ever able to walk away from her?”

Angel let out a sigh. “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, but I’m glad I did. We obviously weren’t meant to be together. If I stayed, things never would have been like they are between you two. For one thing, I would have probably ended up losing my soul again, which reminds me, and don’t think I can’t notice it. How did you get yours back?”

“Went through gruesome trials, demon granted me a wish. I did it for her, to be the man that she deserves.”

“I have to admit, you have really changed. I can see that you would do anything for Buffy. I never thought I would say this, but she’s lucky to have you,” Angel commented.

That got a smile out of Spike. Not that he cared for Angel’s approval, but he always did have some respect for the elder vampire, so it was nice to hear, even though he was really the lucky one. Now he just prayed that everything would work out.

Chapter 19

“I can’t believe you actually went to Angel.”

Spike ran his fingers through his hair. “I know it wasn’t the best choice, but I was out of options. There’s no one else I can really talk to and we may not be close, but I knew Peaches would understand.”

“You could have talked to me,” Buffy responded, sitting next to him on the couch.

“It was about you, and I already knew what you would say.”

Buffy nodded, accepting his answer. “So, how’s he doing?”

Spike raised his eyebrows. “Do you really wanna know?”

She took in a deep breath. “Yeah, I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t.”

“He has a kid of his own; don’t ask me how it happened. The mother is Darla, believe it or not.”

That was the last thing she expected to hear. “Okay, that makes no sense. She was dead, last time I checked, as in the dusty kind.”

Spike nodded. “I didn’t exactly ask for the details. She was pregnant and ended up staking herself just so the baby could be born, which was something I never would have expected from her. That bloody bitch never had a soft spot for children; I guess things are different when it’s your kid.”

“Wow, so Angel has a baby then? I would pay good money to see how he deals with that. Is it a boy or girl?”

“Boy, all human, and apparently very healthy.”

Buffy took in this new information, an idea forming. “Hey, wouldn’t it be cute if Dawn…”

He cut her off, knowing what she would say. “Don’t even think about it, Slayer. No daughter of mine is going to end up with that wanker’s offspring. We may be okay right now, but he’s still your ex.”

She shrugged, a smile on her face. “It was just a thought.”

“Well, get it out of your head.”

“Duly noted, it’s no longer in my head,” she claimed.

“Good, just so we’re clear.”

Buffy rested her head against his shoulder. “Do you think I’ll have a boy or a girl?”

He kissed the top of her head, once again praying that this birth would be a smooth one. “I don’t know. I wouldn’t mind another girl. I don’t know if teenage boys are something I would want to handle, let Peaches do it.”

She laughed. “Trust me; teenage girls are no easier, what with the dating and all. You would be more protective over a girl than you would over a boy, way more to worry about, like teenage pregnancy, and all that fun stuff parents have to deal with.”

Spike looked pale, even more so than usual. “Is there a chance we can lock Dawn up until she’s forty?”


* * * * *


“No way, are you serious?”

Spike chuckled. “You seem more shocked by that than of Angel having a kid.”

Buffy scrunched up her nose. “And with good reason, this is Cordelia we’re talking about. Has he lost his mind?!”

“You’re not jealous, are you?” he asked teasingly, but was still worried about her answer.

“Hardly, it’s just weird. I always knew they had this attraction to each other, even when we were together, but I never thought anything would come of it. I mean, it’s Cordelia!”

Spike settled her down on his lap, wrapping his arms around her. “It’s not so strange; the cheerleader has changed since she left this bloody town. Besides, she’s probably the only one who can keep Peaches on his toes. Not that you didn’t do a fine good job of that, but you’re not the same girl you once were, either.”

She pouted, deciding to accept Angel’s very bad taste in women. “Well, it’s not like I ever thought I’d be dating you, I guess anything is possible.

“Oi, don’t sound so upset about that,” he said, tickling her, which he knew was her weakness.

Buffy collapsed in giggles. “All right, I give, stop with the torture. I’ll never be upset to have you in my life,” she stated, making amends.

Spike smiled. “That’s more like it.” He gave her a peck on the lips, which soon turned more passionate.

Buffy pulled away when she felt a familiar stirring in her abdomen, placing a hand over it and raising her eyes to his. “Did you feel that? The baby just kicked.”

He covered her hand with his, a bigger smile forming on his face when he felt the tiny movement. “Bloody hell, she’s already just like her mum.”

Buffy squeezed his hand, tears suddenly clouding her vision. “See, everything is going to be fine. We just have to keep believing that.”

Spike wished to have her confidence, but knew that she was right. They’ve been through so much together already, this was just one more obstacle to get through, and he knew they would do just that.


* * * * *


“So, Buffy’s being all hormonal?”

Spike let out a sigh. “I love her, but I’m very tempted to strangle her. She’s driving me bloody crazy. Was it this bad the first time?”

Xander shrugged. “Thankfully, I wasn’t around much then. I knew better.”

“And what would you do if Anya was pregnant? Just avoid her until the kid comes out?”

Xander’s eyes widened. “It’s a little too soon for that, we’re not thinking about kids yet.”

“You may not be, but I guarantee the idea has been in her head for a while.”

Xander paled, shaking his head. “We’re talking about you, not me. What else has Buffy done?” he asked, changing the subject.

Spike rubbed the back of his neck. “She says she wants sex, right? I’m obviously okay with that, I get her ready, and then right in the middle of it, she changes her mind. Says she’s not in the mood anymore, and when I turn sex down, the few times that actually happens because I’m worried about hurting her, she calls me a wuss, or a pansy. The bloody bint keeps stealing my words, and I can’t say I really care for it, especially not when she mocks my accent. What the fuck am I doing wrong? I’m just looking out for her.”

Xander patted him on the back. “It’s not you, man. It’s always them. They get these damn mood swings, which have them blaming you for every little thing. Did she apologize later on?”

“Yeah, actually, she said she was sorry and let me hold her. Instead of constantly pushing me away and cursing the fact that I knocked her up. How do you know so much when you’ve never had any children?”

Xander grinned. “The Lifetime channel, bleach boy. It’s gotten me through many lonely nights.”

Spike raised his eyebrows. “That’s something you should keep to yourself, Harris.”

Xander watched him walk away in confusion. “What? It helps! It’s quality entertainment!” He shook his head and sighed. “I really need to get more male friends.”

Chapter 20

“No, that’s not happening.”

Buffy knew he would argue with her, but she had to make him understand. “Spike, this is important. I really want to do it for the baby.”

He shook his head, not about to back down. “We’re not doing anything just in case, Slayer. You said that everything was going to be fine, and you had me believing you.”

“I feel in my heart that everything will be fine, but you never know when something could go wrong. It’s important to be prepared. I want the baby to remember me if it comes to that.”

“The baby’s not gonna need to remember you,” Spike explained, tears forming in his eyes that he couldn’t hide anymore. “She’s going to know you, see you every bloody day. She won’t need a videotape reminder when you’re always going to be around. I’ll see to that, Buffy. You’re going to be there for every part of this child’s life, and Dawn’s. They don’t need to watch their mother on some video, saying how much you love them when you can do that in person.”

Buffy hated that she’d made him cry. She knew how much he didn’t want to talk about what could happen during the labor, but it was important to her. It was important that her children grew up knowing how loved they were, that they had a mother who would have done anything for them. No matter what, she knew they would be well taken care of. Spike would see to that, so she decided to let the subject drop for now. Buffy took him in her arms, guiding his head to her shoulder as she rubbed his back, whispering soothing words to ease him. “It’s okay, honey. I didn’t mean to upset you. I just want them to know…”

He pulled away, cutting her off. “They will know. You don’t need to make a video, love. If…if something happens, I’ll tell them every chance I get how amazing their mother was. You’ll still be here through me, but we won’t need to worry about that any time soon. You’re not going anywhere.”

Buffy gave him a sad smile. It meant a lot that he always believed that.


* * * * *


Getting closer to Buffy’s due date, the sweetness was bound to fade. She was grouchy, irritable, and definitely not a joy to be around, but Spike loved her. He just had to keep reminding himself of that.

“Oh my God, do you have to breathe so damn loud?”

Spike shut his eyes, opening them to glare at her while trying to keep his temper in check. “I’m all the way on the other side of the bloody room, and may I remind you, vampire. We don’t even breathe.”

She rolled her eyes. “That is such a load of crap. You may not need to breathe in order to live, but you do it. And right now, it’s getting on my nerves. Angel used that whole ‘no breath’ thing as an excuse to let me die when I was sixteen. Yeah, right, he so could have saved me when I drowned, but did he? No, he didn’t even bother to try. Would you have done the same thing, huh?”

“There’s no easy way out of this conversation, is there?”

She stood up, which wasn’t easy with her large belly. “I knew it! I bet you don’t even really care about me. You just wanted to get in my pants, and now that that’s done and you knocked me up, the truth comes out.”

“Are you daft, woman? Why would a man, living or dead, put up with your mood swings if they didn’t love you?” he wondered, stepping over to her, checking carefully to make sure she had no stakes on her.

Buffy was getting tired of these pregnancy hormones. She wanted the whole thing over with. “Fuck me, Spike. I want this baby out now.” She jumped him then, as much as she could with the added weight, attacking his mouth with hers.

Spike wasn’t one to complain, so he gave back as good as he got. He just got her over to the couch when she pulled away, a frown on her flushed face. “What is it?”

“Change of plans,” she panted. “My water just broke.”

His eyes widened, helping her up carefully and leading her over to the front door, grabbing the bag that they’d packed a few weeks ago. “Just keep taking deep breaths, love. I’ll get you to the hospital as soon as I can, we’ll call Joyce and the others on the way.”

She nodded and got in his car once he opened the door for her, clutching her stomach as she continued her breathing exercises.

Spike sped away from the house as soon as he got in the car, heading for the hospital with one thought on his mind, that nothing would go wrong.


* * * * *


He was ushered into the room after Buffy, who was screaming bloody murder along the way. They gave him hospital scrubs to put on, and Spike never thought in a million years that he would ever be in this position, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“You’re doing great, Buffy. It looks like this baby is ready to come out,” Dr. Saunders claimed.

Buffy breathed heavily, gripping Spike’s hand tight in hers. “Don’t let go,” she pleaded.

“Never,” he responded, squeezing her hand back.

“Okay, Buffy, it’s time to push now.”

She did just that, feeling drained from just one push. “God, it hurts so much. I don’t remember it being this bad the first time.”

That worried Spike, bringing her hand to his mouth and placing a kiss on her knuckles. “You can do it, sweetheart.”

“You’re almost there, Buffy. Just give us one more push.”

She did as the doctor said; pushing with all the strength she had left in her. Buffy laid her head back when it was over, tears streaming down her face at the sounds of a crying baby.

“Congratulations, you have a boy.”

Spike was in awe as he gazed at the child. “I guess you weren’t a girl, after all.” It didn’t matter to him. He had a son; something he never thought could happen. He wasn’t worthy of such a gift, but he would treasure it always. He was worried when Buffy’s eyes closed, even more so when the machines beeped at her side. “What’s going on?”

The nurse suddenly pulled him out of the room. “You’ll need to wait outside, sir.”

That was the last thing Spike wanted to do, but he obeyed and watched through the door. All he heard was that she was losing a lot of blood. He stood there and waited as his biggest fear came to life.

Chapter 21

Spike was pacing the waiting room, beyond worried about Buffy. If she didn’t make it through this, he didn’t know what he would do.

“You should sit down, Spike. You’re making us dizzy.”

He nodded at Willow, but sitting still was not an option at the moment. “What’s taking so long? I’m about to lose my bloody mind here.”

Tara rubbed his back in comfort, always the one to make everyone feel better. “She’ll be okay, Spike. Buffy’s strong, if anyone can get through this, it’s her.”

That gave him some reassurance, but didn’t stop him from being worried. Spike perked up when the doctor finally headed in their direction, making his way over to him and not wasting any time with his questions. “How is she? Is she okay? Is the baby going to be all right?”

The doctor held up his hand, a smile on his face. “You have a very healthy, baby boy. Buffy lost a lot of blood, but we managed to get her stabilized. She’s still out of it, but should make a full recovery. It’s up to her now.”

Spike sighed in relief as all of their friends cheered and hugged at the happy news. “Thank you, Doctor. When can we see her?”

“Visiting hours are over right now and Buffy needs to rest, but you can each go in one at a time.”

He nodded, turning to the others once the doctor walked away. “You should go in first, Joyce.”

She shook her head. “I was actually going to call the sitter to check on Dawn, you go on ahead. You should be the first one she sees.”

Spike nodded again and took off to Buffy’s room, taking a deep breath that he didn’t need before entering. He saw her lying in bed, tubes sticking out of her and the machines beeping at her side, but this sound was much more soothing.

Buffy opened her eyes when she felt him near, giving him a small smile. “Hey,” she whispered.

“Hey, sweetheart, how are you feeling?” he asked, taking a seat in the chair next to her bed.

“Kind of fuzzy, is the baby okay?”

He smiled, taking her hand in his. “The baby’s fine. We have a beautiful, little boy.”

“I know how much you wanted a girl.”

Spike shook his head. “Once I saw him, that didn’t seem to matter. Besides, I already have Dawn. After the horror stories you told me, I think one teenage girl is all I can handle.”

She laughed, which wasn’t a good idea at the moment.

He turned serious when she grimaced, bringing her hand to his mouth and pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “I don’t know what I would have done if I lost you.”

Buffy gave his hand a squeeze. “I told you everything would be okay. I’m not ready to go anywhere yet. My head feels funny, though.”

“You’re probably weak from the blood loss; I should let you rest now.”

She didn’t let his hand go as he stood up. “Not yet, stay a little while longer. Are the others here?”

“Yeah, they’re all waiting to see you. I should at least let your mum have a chance. I’ll still be here if you need me.”

Buffy nodded and let him go then.

He touched his lips to her forehead, lingering there for a moment. “I love you.”

She smiled, feeling herself start to drift off. “I love you, too.”


* * * * *


Buffy and the baby, who was given the name William James, were finally able to leave the hospital two weeks later.

Spike held him over Dawn’s crib. “This is your little brother, princess.”

She giggled, reaching out her tiny hand to touch the baby.

Spike smiled, still in complete shock that he was a father. He always felt like one with Dawn, but William made it official.

“Buffy’s in bed, and complaining about it already. She’s not thrilled that the doctor has her on bed rest.”

Spike chuckled, handing William over to Joyce as he headed to Buffy’s room.

Buffy pouted when she saw him. “This is so not fair. Why do I need to stay in bed? This is supposed to come before you have the baby. I’m perfectly fine; they wouldn’t have let me out of the hospital if I wasn’t.”

Spike moved to her side, sitting on the edge of the bed. “I think they let you out because you were driving the nurses crazy.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault, you try being stuck in a bed for two weeks and feel differently. You know how much I hate hospitals.”

He nodded, lying down at her side. “That I do, but I think you handled it very well.”

She rested her head against his chest. “How’s my baby?”

“I’m doing just fine,” he responded with a grin.

Buffy rolled her eyes. “I mean my other baby, both of them.”

“I think Dawn likes the idea of being a big sister. Her little face lit up when I introduced her to William.”

“Yeah, she feels that way now, but I predict lots of fights as they get older.”

He agreed. “That could be said for any siblings.”

“Why am I so tired?”

Spike kissed the top of her head. “You’ve had a rough few weeks, get some sleep now. I’ll watch over you.”

She nodded and did just that.

Spike took advantage of the fact she was finally sleeping to kiss her eyelids, nose, and then her lips, being careful not to wake her. “Thank you for giving me a family,” he whispered to her, then dozed off himself.

Joyce watched them from the doorway, pleased that her little girl finally had everything she deserved. A loving man and two, beautiful children. Joyce was too old to have more kids, but she wouldn’t mind having a man in her life.


* * * * *


“Spike, stop, I can walk!” she exclaimed, laughing.

“Yes, but I like to carry you,” he retorted, carrying her into the house.

It had been months since she got back from the hospital. They were both returning from their date, grateful for the time alone. After all, with two babies in the house, they didn’t have much time to themselves.

He put her down, capturing her mouth with his in a passionate kiss.

Buffy moved them into the living room, not taking her lips off of his. She finally let him go, her jaw dropping at the sight in front of them. “Mom?! Giles?!”

The two adults pulled away from each other, trying to fix their disheveled appearances.

“Honey, you’re home early,” Joyce commented.

“And you were supposed to be babysitting, not making out on the couch with my Watcher. Are you trying to scar me for life?”

Spike laughed. “That’s bloody brilliant. Way to go, Rupert!”

Buffy elbowed him in the stomach, sending him a glare. “You are so not helping.”

Giles blushed, clearing his throat. “I’m terribly sorry about this, Buffy. We never intended for you to find out about us like this.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Just how long has this been going on?”

“It has only been a few weeks,” Joyce responded.

Buffy scrunched up her nose. “I don’t even wanna know what else you guys have been doing while we weren’t here. I’m going to check on the babies.” She turned to Spike. “Your offer about getting a place of our own? I think I’ll be taking you up on that now.”

Spike was happy to hear that as he followed after her, wiggling his eyebrows at the couple before being pulled upstairs by his very agitated girlfriend.

Chapter 22

He stood in the doorway of her room, watching as she put on her make up, looking so utterly gorgeous. He hated the idea of letting her go; knowing that she was going out with that boy — a boy not even worthy of her — but then again, no one was worthy enough for his princess. He was yanked away from the sight of her brushing her long, dark hair, only to stare into the eyes of an irritated blonde.

“Stop watching her, Spike. She’s nervous enough as it is,” Buffy commented.

“Not nearly as nervous as I am. Do we have to let her go on this bloody date? She’s just a child.”

Buffy rolled her eyes. “She’s fifteen; I was younger when I started dating.”

Spike scoffed. “Oh, that makes me feel so much better. I know your track record,” he muttered.

“The point is that Dawn is a young woman now. She’s going on her first real date, with a boy she really likes. She doesn’t need us smothering her.”

Spike crossed his arms over his chest, a pout forming on his lips. “Why does it have to be with him? Sure, you joked about this happening, but I never actually thought it would. It’s Angel’s spawn, for crying out loud.”

Buffy smiled. “Connor’s a nice kid, you only don’t like him because of who his father is, but that doesn’t even make much sense anymore. You and Angel are friends; you guys hang out a lot. I don’t see what the problem is. You’ve stopped being at each other’s throats a long time ago.”

Spike let out a sigh. “Yeah, but I’ll still never really like him.”

“Honey, I doubt you would like any boy Dawn brought home, no matter who their parents were,” she said, patting him on the back.

Dawn came out of her room then, giving them a pointed look. “You do realize I can hear everything you’re saying, right?”

Buffy turned to the young girl. “Sorry about that, sweetie. I’m sure you’ll have a great time tonight. You look so beautiful,” she claimed, tears in her eyes as she hugged her daughter.

Dawn returned the embrace. “Don’t cry, Mom. We’ve been over this, I’ll be fine.”

Buffy nodded, pulling away from the hug. “I know, but I still can’t believe how grown up you are now.”

“Are you guys gonna kiss and stuff? That’s just gross,” said a snotty voice from behind them.

Dawn rolled her eyes at her pesky younger brother, not even bothering to dignify that with a response.

Spike grinned, ruffling his son’s hair. “Just wait until you get older, mate. You won’t mind it so much.”

The boy scrunched up his nose, heading back to his room.

Dawn took a deep breath when the doorbell rang, running down the stairs and letting Connor into the house, giving him a shy smile.

“Hey, Dawn, you look really pretty. These are for you; my dad said that you’re supposed to give flowers when you take a girl out.”

She smiled, taking the roses from him. “Thanks, that was sweet of you.”

Buffy took the flowers to put them in some water, leaving the teenagers to their privacy, after dragging Spike into the kitchen with her.

“I don’t like the looks of that kid.”

Buffy rolled her eyes for what felt like the millionth time that day alone. “You worry way too much. They’re only going to a movie.”

Spike raised his eyebrows. “Only a movie? Do you remember what happened the last time we went to a movie?”

Her eyes widened.

“Exactly, couples never go to the theater to actually watch the sodding movie. They go to make out, or feel each other up, or in our case, have sex in the back row.”

Buffy blushed, remembering that day like it was yesterday. It was their anniversary, so Spike decided to take her to dinner, followed by a late night movie, while her mom and Giles were home with the kids. They always liked to sit in the back, because she knew Spike could never keep his hands to himself. As soon as the lights went out, he was on her, nibbling her earlobe and slipping his fingers under her skirt. She chose not to wear panties that night, just to make it easier for him. He crushed his mouth to hers once she came; muffling her cries, then picked her up and placed her on his lap, where she rode his cock into oblivion. They were found by an usher minutes later, who told them to never return again after Spike growled at the boy for not being able to take his eyes off of Buffy’s tits. She shook her head, breaking out of her reverie.

“It’s only the first date, and Dawn is very responsible. Nothing’s going to happen.”

Spike threw his hands up in the air. “Great, you just jinxed it.”

Dawn entered the kitchen, a smile on her face. “We’re leaving now, I promise to be back by ten.”

Buffy gave her daughter one more hug, running her fingers through her dark locks. “Just be careful, okay?”

The brunette nodded. “Of course,” Dawn replied, turning back to Spike. She moved closer, giving him a hug as well. “I’ll always be your little girl, Daddy.”

His eyes teared up, holding her tighter and not wanting to let her go, but knowing he had to. It was time that he let her grow up. “You have fun, nibblet, but not too much.”

Dawn laughed. “I’ll try my best,” she said, and with one last wave to her parents, left the house with Connor.

“You know what I miss?” Spike wondered a moment later, not waiting for her to answer. “An Apocalypse. That would be much more comforting right about now.”

Buffy pulled him up the stairs and into their bedroom, shoving him down on the bed. “I have ways to take your mind off of it.”

He leered up at her. “Do you now? Well, have at it then.”

Buffy pounced as she flung her clothes to the floor, doing the same with his.

Luckily William had a habit of blasting his music, so he wasn’t likely to hear anything.

She moaned once his cock filled her up, riding him hard.

They’d been together almost sixteen years, and still couldn’t get enough of each other.

“Fuck, baby, you’re gonna squeeze my bloody dick off at this rate.” Spike turned them over, so he was now the one on top as he drove himself further into her pussy, pounding her cunny hard and fast.

Buffy came then, resting her head against his chest, breathing heavily. “Did that help?”

He thought about it. “I don’t know. I’m still worried about Dawn, you may need to distract me some more.”

And she did just that.

The End