A/N's:This is my first real AU fic, be nice. I wasn't going to post this until it was finished because I have so many wip's going, but basically I just feel shitty for not updating so here you go, another work in progress....


**

Spike sat on the couch in his band mates house, guitar in hand, picking at chords and scribbling down the notes. Oz, the lead guitarist In Dingoes ate my baby had disappeared a few moments ago to go answer the door.

Earlier that morning he had got a call and announced that he would be busy for an hour as a friend was coming over. Spike was curious but he had better things to think about. Like practising for the next concert. It ad six months since he had got his head out of the clouds and really threw himself into his work.

He remembered the last few years, a haze of memories really. Drugs, alcohol and Dru. He had really fucked up there. He had been consumed by her. Followed her, even when it had taken him to places he didn’t really want to be. Luckily Oz and Willow had pulled him back before he killed himself and wrecked their band. He shook his head in wonder at his friends. Not only had they rescued him, but they allowed him to still be a part of the band they had started back in college.

He had done so many stupid things, silly publicity stunts at Dru’s request.

“But you would do it, if you loved me, my Spike.” That had been her favourite phrase, and like a lovesick puppy he had done them.

But not now, now he was back on track, and he would stay that way. He went back to strumming a few chords when Willow entered the room.

“Sounds good.” She commented smiling. Spike looked at their drummer. Who would have thought that a computer nerd had such rhythm? But she did and had showed Oz and Spike in a fit of temper when they were teenagers, she had asked to be in the band and Spike said that she could be a groupie.

The redhead sat beside Spike and tapped her thighs with her hands, along with his song.
Oz passed through the hallway with a girl. Spike only saw the back of her as they passed. She had blond hair, she was wearing a black floaty dress and she was barefoot.

“Who’s the hippy?” He asked Willow and she jumped up at his question.

“Buffy’s here? I gotta go.” She made a dash out of the room and followed Oz.

“What sort of name is Buffy?” Spike mumbled to himself. He shook of the curiosity and went back to work.

Soon he heard music drifting into the room and went to investigate. He followed it into one of the back rooms. He heard Oz talking to the mystery guest.

“I don’t really play piano Buffy. Hey Spike can you come play something?” Oz asked as he spotted Spike at the doorway.

Spike looked at Buffy; her back was still turned, as she looked out of the window.

“Oz, I don’t really have time to mess around with other stuff, we have a lot of work to do for the concert. It’s only a couple of months away now.” Oz nodded and Willow gave him a dirty look.

Oz started to play his guitar; the music was soft and haunting, Spike felt goose bumps rise on his arms. He turned to leave.

Then he heard her sing.

**

Chapter 2

Her voice fit the music exactly. It was powerful and full of feeling.

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave

Spike felt a shiver run down his back as her voice floated through the room. Her voice sounded just as haunted as the music. He turned around and headed to the piano; he scanned the sheet music. He caught up and began playing along with Oz.

'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

He watched as Buffy turned and his fingers slipped from the keys. Her eyes were closed as she turned. Her voice rang out, clear and beautiful. He stared at her for a moment; she was possibly the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He resumed playing and got lost in her song. Her face seemed to show every emotion to the song she was singing.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

You used to captivate me
By your resonating life
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me

Willow stared at her friend, her heart breaking for her. She and Buffy had been friends since they were kids, but they rarely saw each other now. She missed her friend desperately and wished with all her heart that she could help, but Buffy didn’t want any help.

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along.


The song came to an end and Spike stared at the woman in front of him, she still had her eyes closed. He glanced at Oz, but he just shook his head.

Oz stood and gestured for Spike to follow him out of the room. Once outside Oz fixed a pointed look at his best friend.

“Leave it alone man, she’s not your type.” The conviction rang out in Oz’s voice and Spike looked surprised.

“She’s got a beautiful voice though.” Spike smiled at the red haired man.

“Leave it alone man.” Was all Oz said.

**

Chapter 3

Willow sat down with Buffy at the piano.

“That was beautiful.” Willow commented after a long silence.

Buffy nodded to her oldest friend.

“How is he?” Willow asked.

“Same.” Buffy answered sadly. Willow watched as Buffy built the walls around her and practically became a different person.

“So, you have a concert coming up huh? You guys are doing really well.” Buffy smiled brightly.

“Yeah, we’re doing well now that Spike is back on track.” Willow answered excitedly, she knew it was a distraction but she couldn’t help but get caught up in her work.

“Would you mind if I came over a few more times to work on the song, it’s not quite how I want it.” Buffy asked suddenly and Willow nodded her head vigorously in assent.

Buffy let out a mental sigh of relief, even spending an hour with Willow and Oz was a blessing; she hadn’t seen them in a few years. She had called Oz’s parents a couple of days ago and got their new number.

When she had called Oz had sounded really pleased to hear from her. Then when the phone passed to Willow she had spent a further four hours on the phone.

“What about you and Oz?” Buffy asked happily once again.

“I don’t know Buffy, sometimes I think he likes me but then I have to think of the band, what if things don’t work out?” Willow let out a ramble.

“He so likes you, you can tell by the way he looks at you. I can’t believe you didn’t get together before now, and you can’t think the ‘what if’s’. Go for it.” Buffy stated passionately.

“We never got together because I was dating Xander and he was dating Amy.” Willow explained.

“Yeah, but your both free now.” Buffy nudged.

“I guess.” Willow grinned sheepishly.

“What’s the deal with Spike?” Buffy asked curiously.

“He’s not normally so moody, but after all that shit with Dru, he’s really thrown himself into his music. I think he’s afraid that if he cuts loose it’ll all go downhill again for him.” Willow explained their band mate’s attitude.

“Come on, we’ll go get a coffee.” Willow tugged at her arm and dragged her to the kitchen.

The phone rang as she put the coffee machine into action.

“Hang on for a sec.” willow called and darted out of the room.

Buffy heard the strumming of a guitar wafting through from the front room and her feet carried her closer to the music. She stood in the door way of the kitchen and watched Spike as he played. His eyes were closed and she smiled at his innocent looking face.

She almost jumped when his soft husky voice started to sing along with the music. She stared at him and felt her knees go slightly weak; he had a beautiful voice she noted.

When she looked at his face again she jumped when she noticed his eyes were now open and staring at her.

“See anything you like?” he asked in a leering voice.

Buffy rolled her eyes.

“Not particularly, I was just wondering how such a great voice comes out of something looking like you.” Buffy shocked herself by being so rude but he had caught her off guard, she just hoped she hadn’t offended him to much.

To her surprise Spike threw back his head and laughed.

“It took years of serious and dedicated abuse to look this good.” He commented wryly and Buffy smiled.

“You have a beautiful voice luv, do you sing professionally?” He asked still smiling.

“No I don’t, and before you offer, I have no intention of getting on your casting couch for an interview with your manager.” She answered cutely.

“I’m sure Willow would give you an interview without the casting couch.” Spike chuckled again. This girl had some fire; it was one or the other for his usually. Girls either throwing themselves at him or they turned into star struck gibbering idiots. It was refreshing to have a normal conversation.

“So you don’t want to have my babies? I’m crushed.” He added smirking.

“That is a pleasure I will have to pass on, thank you though.” Buffy answered with a serious face but ruined it when she laughed a second later.

“Honestly luv, why don’t you sing, your good enough to make it.” Spike asked curiously, her voice had had an incredible effect on him.

“I don’t want to. I like to sing for me, I have no interest in being followed around or being hounded by the public, I like my life the way it is.” Buffy answered sincerely and it shocked Spike. For him the whole point of life was the rush he felt when he was on stage, or when he was recognized in the street, he loved it.

**

Chapter 4

Willow returned from her phone call and noticed the sparks flying between the two. She smiled inwardly and stopped in the front room.

“Spike you want a coffee?” Willow asked and seeing him nod she went to the kitchen to finish making it.

Buffy followed her and sat at the counter.

“Was that a little flirting I witnessed?” Willow asked in a sing song voice.

Buffy shook her head vigorously.

“God no, just talking.” She gasped out.

Willow giggled at the flustered face of her best friend.

“Well it wouldn’t hurt would it?” willow commented innocently.

“A world of no, Willow. It could only lead to bad things and I so don’t need any worries at the moment.” Buffy answered seriously.

Willow watched her oldest friend and felt her heartstrings pull, for a moment there, she had seen some of the old Buffy, but the she had closed off again.

Buffy drank her coffee in silence as Willow took some out to Spike. When Willow returned Buffy was rinsing her cup in the sink.

“Well I’d better go, are you sure it’s okay to come over again?” Buffy kept the hope out of her voice, as silly as it was; she had really enjoyed herself today. She had felt free for a while.

“Of course your welcome anytime, Buffy. It’s been really great seeing you again.” Willow hugged her oldest friend tightly and saw her out.

Willow wandered through to the front room and Spike spoke without looking up from his guitar.

“Will she be back?” he asked nonchalantly.

“Yeah, she wants to work on her stuff more.” Willow answered with a small smile.

“So she really wrote that song?” he asked this time with curiosity.

“Yep, she was always creative; she used to paint as well.” Willow explained.

“Used to?” Spike questioned.

“She has a really complicated life Spike.” Willow spoke cryptically, she wasn’t going to fill him in, if Buffy chose to then it was her choice.

“Don’t we all Red.” Spike snorted.

**

Chapter 5

It was the following week before Buffy made it back to Willow and Oz’s house, she marveled that the two of them lived together but they didn’t get together, especially when they were both so into each other.

She knocked at the door and it was answered by Spike.

“Did you move in and just not tell anyone?” Buffy smirked at his face.

“Do you ever wear shoes?” Spike countered with a smirk of his own.

He looked at her clothes, this time she wore low riding jeans and high riding top, and of course, no shoes.

“Sometimes.” Buffy answered with a smile.

Spike stood back to let her in and she wandered into the house. Spike followed her, staring at her ass, it was a great ass.

Buffy looked over her shoulder and caught him looking.

“I’m gonna start charging if you keep doing that.” She commented easily and laughed at the guilty look that crossed his face at being caught.

“Sorry.” He mumbled sheepishly and she grinned at him.

“So, you here to work on some music?” Spike quickly changed the subject.

Buffy chuckled at his diversion tactics as Spike led the way into the front room.
Spike sat on the couch and Buffy sat in one of the armchairs opposite.

“Yeah, Willow and Oz said they could spare an hour for me, I want to work on the music half of it, I’m not happy with some of it.” Buffy answered.

Spike was amazed at the passion in her face and voice, how could this only be a hobby for her?

“There are a couple of cords you might want to change and I’ve had some thoughts to changing the melody slightly…shit! I’m sorry if I offended you, sometimes I just open my mouth and away it goes.” Spike ran a hand through his hair and tugged slightly on the end.

“I didn’t mean to imply that the song was bad.” He said in an apologetic voice. Buffy smiled as she realized that his voice was slightly more refined when he was flustered.

Buffy let out a giggle at his little rant and watched him as he cast a quick glance in her direction.

“Don’t sweat it; I could do with all the help I can get. I know what I want to do with the songs and music but I’m not entirely sure on how to do it.” Buffy explained.

“You’re just starting out? I’m surprised; you have got some real talent. I thought you’d been doing this for years.” Spike couldn’t hide his surprise or the honesty in his voice.

Buffy gave him a shy smile. The way he looked at her gave her a warm feeling inside, she quickly looked away.

**

Chapter 6

“So where’s Willow?” Buffy asked looking around, wanting to divert the conversation.

Spike slumped back into the sofa, he wanted to groan in frustration, and every time he seemed to make a connection with Buffy she pulled away. And for some reason, he wanted a connection with this woman very much.

“She’s still out with Oz, they should be back soon.” Spike answered.

“Are they on a date?” Buffy almost squealed with excitement.

Spike chuckled at her face and shook his head.

“No. Food shopping or something. So you too, huh? I’ve been waiting forever for those two to get together.” Spike answered.

“They are mad about each other; I want to give them both a good hard kick.” Buffy laughed as her frustration came out.

“They’ll sort it out, things like that are inevitable.” Spike was looking straight at Buffy when he spoke and the intensity of his look made her blush. Spike suppressed a chuckle. Yep, the connection was there, he just had to work on it a little.

“I’ll help you if you like.” Spike spoke suddenly, it made Buffy jump.

“Help? With what?” Buffy could almost feel herself back peddling into the armchair.

Spike gave her an amused look before answering.

“With the song, luv.” He explained.

“Oh. Sure.” Buffy answered with false chirpiness. She had a bad feeling about this, it could only lead to trouble but she just didn’t want to remove herself from the situation.

“So, what did you want to work on?” Spike asked, sitting forward.

**

When Willow and Oz returned about twenty minutes later, Buffy and Spike were so engrossed that they barely noticed. Willow took the shopping into the kitchen. Oz watched as Spike leaned into Buffy and laid a finger on her throat.

“Your singing from here, try to reach from here.” He moved his finger to touch between Buffy’s breasts.

Buffy blushed slightly but continued to look into Spikes eyes.

Oz followed Willow into the kitchen.

“There is going to be some serious fallout in there.” He spoke seriously.

Willow rolled her eyes at him.

“Don’t be such a drama queen, doesn’t Buffy deserve a little fun?” she asked.

“Not at Spikes expense, what if he wants more than a little fun?” Oz countered.

“Spike? Please, he’s like the biggest slut ever!” Willow snorted.

“Not anymore Willow, he’s really got his shit together, when was the last time you see him with anyone?” Oz countered again.

“Oz! He’s a grown man and you don’t know what or who he’s doing on his own time. Just leave them be.” Willow gave Oz the resolve face. Oz shrugged and began helping Willow put the groceries away.

**

Chapter 7

Things carried on the same way for the next few weeks. Buffy went to Willows place at least once a week to work on songs and music and more often than not she would end up working with Spike.

Occasionally he would ask her opinion on lyrics or melodies, which is how, when Spike suggested that they do something together Buffy was overwhelmed and delighted. Buffy felt so pleased it was almost ridiculous, she felt as if she had something that belonged to just her and Spike.

She had a very good feeling that Spike liked her and she would love to have gotten involved with him, if only things were different.

All in all things were good; Buffy couldn’t remember being this content, so when Willow called her she was secretly delighted.

“We’re going out on Friday, will you come?” Willow almost pleaded.

“I don’t know Willow.” Buffy answered sounding unsure.

“Oh please Buffy, I think tonight might be the night for me and Oz! If I ask Spike to bring someone, he’ll just bring some skank and ruin the evening. Please come, please!”
Willow finished with a deep breath and Buffy laughed.

“So you want the pleasure of my company because you want to jump Oz and Spike only knows skanky women?” Buffy asked suppressing another laugh.

“Well you know it’s been so long since Spike actually came out with us I’m not sure he knows any women let alone skanky ones.” Willow waffled to herself and Buffy’s heart did a little flip.

Buffy giggled again.

“So why am I coming?” Buffy asked mildly.

“So I can jump Oz and not have to worry about abandoning Spike, oh that and because Spike asked if you were going.” Willow added the last with an evil smile on her face.

“He did?” Oh yeah, Buffy felt that familiar tingle that she had now christened the Spike tingle.

“Uh-huh” Willow confirmed and then added quickly.

“So meet us here at eight. Ok, gotta go, bye.” She hung up before Buffy could confirm or deny. Willow did a little dance of joy around the kitchen feeling very pleased with her self.

**

Chapter 8

Buffy climbed out of her jeep and smoothed down her skirt. She had scoured the contents of her wardrobe looking for something to wear. God only knew how long it had been since she had been out sociably.

The place where they were going was more likely to be a kinda of rock joint; she had no idea what to wear. She finally settled on black backless vest top and brown knee length suede skirt, topped off with knee high boots. Smart yet casual, her hair, she left down.

She knocked at the door and smiled when Spike opened it.

“You did, you moved in didn’t you?” Buffy teased.

“And you, you do own footwear, and may I say what a set of footwear it is.” Spike teased back, overtones evident.

Buffy blushed but had no chance to answer as Willow hurtled through the door and Oz followed her.

“Buffy, you look gorgeous! Come on lets go.” She squealed as she linked an arm through Buffy’s.

Buffy looked over her shoulder at Oz.

“Did she get into the coffee again?” Before he could answer Willow dragged her off to the taxi that had just pulled up.

In the back of the taxi Buffy caught Willows attention.

“Will there be any press at this club?” she whispered and was relieved when she saw Willow shake her head.

**

Once inside the club they were whisked away to the VIP lounge and were served champagne. Buffy held her glass politely for a few minutes before putting it down untouched. She turned as she felt a tap on her shoulder, it was Spike, he held out a drink to her and Buffy raised an eyebrow.

“Coke.” He informed her.

The relief shone on her face as she took the drink and took a sip.

“So you not a big drinker either huh?” he asked softly, and Buffy shook her head.

“You?” Buffy asked as she noticed Spike holding a glass of Coke also.

“6 months sober, I had some serious issues a while back.” Spike answered truthfully, what was the point in lying? Most of his exploits had been in the papers.

“Your groupies must be so disappointed.” Buffy teased, lightening the situation.

“You could be my groupie.” Spike answered with a husky voice.

Buffy giggled before adopting a look of awe.

“You mean, you’d like, let me be your groupie, oh wow.” She panted breathlessly.

She gave Spike an impish Smile before using her hand to flick her hair over one shoulder and turning round so that her back was to spike. She looked at Spike over her shoulder.

“Hey, would you, like, sign my ass?” she asked fluttering her eyes.

A passing guy shaking his head in disgust. “Fucking groupies.” He mumbled as he passed.

Spike looked at Buffy and burst out laughing.

“That was convincing, have you done this before?” he asked.

Buffy shook her head, still laughing.

“No, you’re my first.”

Something about the words made Spike want to groan.

Buffy watched as his eyes filled with something different, and then she realized it was desire.

A bolt of lust hit Buffy in the stomach and headed south. She cast a quick glance around the room for Willow and Oz but they were no where in sight.

“You want to get out of here?” Spike asked huskily.

Buffy tried to think about it but her head seemed to have other ideas as she realized it was nodding.

Spike grabbed her hand and lead her to the doors.