Chapter 1: Problems
Walking into the cemetery Buffy clutched the stake in her hand. Her head was pounding, causing her to feel sick. She had had this feeling for a few weeks now, however she refused to tell anyone, just like she refused to give up patrolling. Slayers didn’t get sick; it was as simple as that. Her headache was probably caused from being ripped out of heaven anyway.
She wished that Giles would have come back from England sooner, no doubt he would have told her what was wrong. But telling him would mean admitting where she had been, she couldn’t do that to anyone. Anyone except Spike it seemed. Buffy was unsure what had caused her to confess to Spike that afternoon in the alley, but something had told her she needed to tell someone she couldn’t keep it all bottled up inside. Yet funnily enough ever since she had told Spike that’s exactly what she had done, she’d kept everything bottled up inside, she didn’t share anything with anyone anymore.
Each day she tried to get back to normal, yet each day away from where she had been was making it harder and harder.
Clutching the stake tighter she tried to ignore the pounding in her head and the dizziness that seemed to surround her, and carried on into the cemetery determined to find some baddie to take her frustration and pent up feelings out on.
*********
Spike watched from on top of his crypt at the slayer as she wandered aimlessly into the cemetery. Stopping just below him she placed her hand to her temple and closed her eyes.
He knew something was wrong with her, something didn’t smell right, and she hadn’t even noticed that he was sat here.
Hearing a rustling behind her he saw her head suddenly snap up as she turned to face the newly risen vampire. He watched as her expression hardened, he loved watching her fight. Her moves were always so fluid and graceful.
However things seemed different this evening. Suddenly her moves seemed less graceful and more clumsy, her targets weren’t hitting their marks, she was barely able to miss the blows that were sent her way. Something was definitely wrong with her tonight; she couldn’t even defend herself against a fledgling.
Jumping down from the crypt roof and landing gracefully on his feet, he approached Buffy from behind. Still however she made no move to show that she knew he was there. As he came to stand next to her, he flinched as he watched her take a particularly brutal hit to her chin, causing her to stagger backwards.
Then suddenly everything changed, staggering backwards Buffy’s knees suddenly gave way causing her to fall to the floor. Spike darted forward with all the speed a vampire could muster and caught her jut before she hit the floor, and gently laid her on the ground. The new vampire just stood there in shock staring at the girl on the floor. Amazed that he could have done such a thing.
Standing up, Spike picked up the stake that was lying next to Buffy’s still form and advance towards the stunned vampire.
Giving him a swift kick to the stomach followed by a brutal punch to the nose, causing the vampire to go flying backwards where his back hit a tombstone and he sunk to the floor. Twirling the stake between his fingers he slowly walked up to the dazed vampire.
“You know you’re doing something wrong mate when even your own kind wants you dead.”
He then thrust his stake into the vampire’s unbeating heart before he even had chance to reply. Turning his back on him, Spike rushed over to Buffy’s side before the vampire had even fully disintegrated.
Buffy now lay on the ground having some form of seizure.
Her eyes were shut and her arms and legs seemed to be flailing about. She seemed to be in pain, but Spike didn’t know how to help. Being careful to mind her legs, which he knew could be quite lethal when they wanted to be; he reached out and took hold of her hand in his own.
“Love? Where’s it hurt? I can’t help you unless you tell me. Come on pet.”
Suddenly her body went limp again, a single tear slipped down her check. Slipping his arm under her neck and another under her legs, he lifted he small frame up, cradling her against his body. Just as he was about to stand, Buffy made a small movement, if he hadn’t been holding her Spike probably would have missed it. Turning her head ever so slightly to the left, Buffy threw up on to the grass right next to her arm, before suddenly going limp again in his arms.
Realising something was seriously wrong, he carefully picked up his precious slayer and started carrying her to Sunnydale Hospital, someone would have to look at her and soon.
******
Spike paced outside the waiting room. When he had arrived at the hospital he had got someone to see Buffy straight away. Watching her lay on the gurney, so limp and small looking had broken his heart. As she was wheeled away to where he could no longer be by her side, he had gone and used the phone to call the rest of the scoobies. He knew they would all be at the magic box.
So now he stood, pacing outside the room. As soon as the scoobies had arrived, demanding to know what had happened and what he had done, they had then made it quite clear that he wasn’t welcome there, not that he could have bared to stand in the same room as their accusing glares anyway. However, refusing to be to far from Buffy, he had simple taken up residence outside of the waiting room.
As he saw the doctor approach, he stood still, and held his breath, not that he needed to breath anyway. However the doctor walked right past him and into the waiting room.
Closing the door behind him as he entered the room, the doctor turned to face the scoobies, leaving Spike looking at the door.
Stepping up to the door he placed his ear against the wood and used his enhanced hearing to hear what the doctor was telling the rest of them.
“I’m afraid the news with Miss Summers doesn’t seem very promising. She is with another doctor at the moment, so I am afraid that she can’t see anyone just yet. It appears that she has suffered from a seizure, although I am also worried about the slight bruising on her chin. Is Miss Summers in any way in an abusive relationship?”
Spike snorted at that one, her whole lifestyle was one abusive relationship. From inside the room Spike heard Giles speak up.
“No Doctor I can assure you that Buffy isn’t in any danger at home or otherwise, I can only assume she got the bruise when she collapsed.”
“Be that as it may, I would still like to keep her in over night just to make sure, we have performed a few basic test and are waiting for the results on those, however there are some more conclusive test that I would like to run just to make sure.”
Once again Spike heard Giles speak up, it appeared that he was the spokesman for the group, no doubt the doctor thought that this was her father.
“Do we have any idea as to what may have caused the seizure doctor?”
“Its too early to say at the moment yet, it could simply be that she was dehydrated, however it could also be something more serious, I really can’t make any assurances at the moment. We are going to keep her in over night and run some more test, we should have the results by the morning. I suggest that you all go home and get some rest; there is nothing you can do here now. Miss Summers will be taken care of, you don’t need to worry, you can come and see her in the morning, she’s in ward four however…”
Spike didn’t wait to hear what else the doctor had to say. Striding over to the elevator he pressed the up button, tapping his foot impatiently as he waited for the doors to close.
As the doors re-opened announcing he was on floor two.
Walking over to ward four’s reception desk, he carefully checked that no one was around before leaning over and checking which room Buffy was in.
As he entered the room, Buffy seemed to be sleeping. He small frame seemed to be hooked up to numerous different machines, each making its own little humming sound. The noise was deafening.
Deciding that she needed sleep, Spike turned and reached for the door handle. Just as his fingers wrapped around it, he heard Buffy call to him. Her voice sending goose bumps down his back at how weak she sounded.
“Spike?”
Turning round he saw her looking at him through hooded eyes, he head supported on the pillows by her hand.
“Yeah, pet, I’m here.” Edging closer to her, he looked down at her small body that seemed to be drowning in the large bed.
“Where is everyone, Spike?”
“Everyone’s downstairs, pet,” Spike kept his voice low as he talked to her. “I wasn’t welcome down there. Doctor told your watcher they couldn’t see you till morning, I think they are all gonna go home to rest and come back for you in the morning.”
Buffy looked at him with sad eyes, “Do they know what’s wrong with me Spike?”
Spike looked into her eyes and could see the pain reflected back in them. She really didn’t know what was happening. “I don’t think the doctors know yet, they said they had done some tests.”
“Yeah, they took some blood.”
Spike chuckled, “They better be bloody careful with it, they don’t know how lucky they are to have such a sweet nectar within their grasp.”
“Ewww, Spike that’s gross, is that all you think about?” A brief smile lit up her face.
“Can't help it love, vampire.” He pointed to himself causing her to chuckle slightly. “Anyway its not the only thing I think about, I could show you all the other nasty things I think of if you want” He wiggled his eyebrows for emphasis, causing Buffy to blush brightly.
“Spike!”
“Well, pet, I best let you get some rest. I just wanted to check you were ok.”
Turning his back to her, he headed to the door again.
“Spike?” Turning to face her, Buffy looked down at the bedding. “Would you stay please?” When he didn’t answer she cast her eyes up and made eye contact with him.
Seeing the fear shinning in her eyes, he couldn’t refuse.
“Ok, love, just don’t be thinking you can be making a regular deal out of this.”
“Cross my heart Spike.”
Taking off his duster he gently laid it over the end of the bed, he then went and sat in the orange chair next to her bed.
After a moment of silence Buffy rolled onto her side to look at Spike.
“Spike, what do you think’s wrong with me?”
“I don’t honestly know. Wish I could tell you, love, but I can’t.”
“Do you think it has something to do with where I was?”
Tears started to well in her eyes as she remembered her time in heaven.
“I don’t know. The only people who could probably tell you are the people you aren’t telling.”
“I know Spike, I just can’t tell them, they can’t know where I was, they can’t.” Fresh tears started to run down her face. “They are going to take me for a CT scan tomorrow. That’s what my mother had Spike. What if its something serious.”
“Whatever it is, love, we’ll deal. Now you should get some
sleep. I’ll stay if you want me to.”
“Thank you Spike.” Turning over onto her other side with her back to Spike, Buffy closed her eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep.
Spike listened to the steady rhythm of her heartbeat, as it slowed as she relaxed and feel asleep. He stayed close by her side for the rest of the night. Never once leaving her alone.
***
When the nurse arrived back into the room next morning to check on Buffy’s progress she was shocked to see Spike sleeping next to her bed, holding her hand tightly in his.
Spike stirred from his sleep when he heard someone enter the room. Seeing the nurse stood there, Spike told her to be quite before gesturing to the girl sleeping soundly next to him.
In a hushed whisper the nurse spoke to him. “Sir, What are you doing here? Miss Summers isn’t allowed visitors yet, and even if she was this certainly isn’t visiting hour, I’m afraid Sir I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”
Spike looked at the nurse, she was short, just barely over 5 feet she had brown frizzy hair and wore a nametag that announced her as ‘Tina’.
“Look, love, Buffy asked me to stay here, and until she tells me to leave, which knowing Buffy could be bloody well soon, I’m not going anywhere Do you think I want her to wake up on her own after I promised to be here?” with that said Spike turned his attention back to Buffy.
Tina stood there stunned, she had never been talked back to before, usually when she told people to leave they just did, no questions asked.
“Well Sir, are you a relation then?” Tina was curious now as to who this man actually was.
“No.” Spike didn’t even look up as he answered her.
“What are you then?”
“Well, I’m a … umm… that is I’m… umm…I’m…” Spike looked up at Tina as he tried to find a suitable answer for what he and Buffy where. He couldn’t rightly tell her that they where mortal enemies, yet recently he had realised that he loved her, and probably always had, but then she had done what she did best and had died saving the world, and it had torn him apart when she died, could he?
“He’s my friend.” Came a groggy voice from next to him.
Looking over he saw Buffy’s eyes flutter open. It made Spike’s unbeating heart swell to hear her call him a friend.
Quickly adjusting to the surprise of being called a friend, he turned back to Tina. “Well then ‘Tina’ is there a reason you’re here, or is it just to piss me off?”
Tina was starting to find the gentleman sat with Miss Summers quite rude, but she bit her tongue, she knew she wasn’t suppose to say anything to the patients friends and family. “Actually I came to prep Miss Summers for her CT scan.”
Spike heard Buffy’s heartbeat pick up before the machines picked it up. Leaning over he held her hand tightly.
“Shhh, Love, it’ll be ok, it’ll be over quickly and they’ll be able to see what’s wrong with you, what’s making you ill and be able to make you all better again.”
Tina was shocked to see such a gentle side in a man who had appeared to be so rough.
Stepping to the side, Spike didn’t let go of her hand, as he let Tina prepare Buffy.
A little while later, Tina left them alone again, and Spike sat back down in the little chair.
“Do you want me to go downstairs and get watcher boy. I’m sure you’d rather have him than me.” Spike tried not to sound to upset as he said it.
“No!” Buffy gripped onto his hand tightly, unaware of the sound of bones cracking, causing Spike to wince. “Don’t leave me Spike. I can’t face them yet. They can’t know.” Tears surfaced again in her large green glassy eyes.
Spike knew however she wasn’t just talking about where she had been. “How long has this been going on, pet?”
“Been having them since I was brought back.” Buffy had considered playing coy and acting like she didn’t know what he was talking about, but she knew he meant the headaches and the seizures, she seemed to be unable to bring herself to lie, to Spike of all people.
“Why didn’t you tell someone, Buffy” He tried to keep the hurt out of his voice that she hadn’t told him, yet still some managed to creep its way in.
All Buffy did in response to Spike’s question was hang her head in shame.
“I don’t know Spike, I guess I didn’t want to accept that I am really back. I don’t belong here, that’s what this is telling me. It can’t mean anything good can it Spike?” Fresh tears appeared in her eyes.
“You listen to me, Buffy Summers. You do belong here. We are going to find out what’s wrong and get you out of here before you know it. You’ll be back to playing Kick the Spike before you can blink, I promise.”
Buffy gave Spike a smile, however it failed to reach her eyes. Her eyes held such sadness and portrayed the horrors she had seen in her short life, the look in her eyes just made Spike want to comfort her.
“Look Buffy…” Just as he was about to say something, Tina walked back into the room, pushing a wheel chair in front of her. She seemed oblivious to the tense atmosphere around her, the conversation she had managed to just abruptly stop. Smiling at Buffy she said in a cheery voice, “Ok Miss Summers they are waiting for you down in radiology” Smiling all the while, as though this was something Buffy should be looking forward to – instead of dreading with a gut wrenching fear as she was.
Carefully Tina detached the drip in Buffy’s arm and helped her to sit in the wheel chair, even though it was clear Buffy had no real need for the help.
“Now Miss Summers your family are all waiting for you downstairs – would you like to see them before you go for the scan?”
“They are not my family.”
Buffy’s face set in grim determination as she looked at the door, as though willing it to open by the sheer force of her mind.
“Ok then Miss Summers. I am afraid your friend will have to stay here, visitors aren’t allowed.”
Buffy head spun round so quickly to look at Spike, her eye suddenly full of fear again.
“Don’t worry, love, I’ll wait here, I’m not going anywhere, I’ll be here when you get back, you won’t be gone long at all I promise.” He reached over and gave her hand one last squeeze.
Slowly nodding, Buffy turned round to face forward again.
Taking the handles, Tina led her away towards the lift.
Spike watched her until the lift doors shut obstructing his view of her. He then went and sat on the bed, taking in her sent that filled the room. Looking at the taupe walls that surrounded him, Spike sat patiently and waited for her to return to him. Watching as the hands on the clock slowly moved round with a dull tick as he waited and waited unaware of what they where finding down in radiology.
TBC…..
Please let me know what you think!!!!
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Author's Chapter Notes:
I would like to say a big thank you to my beta Ciley.. if there are any problems you can all go shout at her.. I'm only joking darling!!!! Secondly I am not sure yet whether this fic is going to be NC-17, so be warned it may be yet!! Please review I am very very nervous about this one, so all the reviews I can get would be very useful!!! Thank you everyone in advance!!!! Ok I'm get my nervous ass to post this before I chicken out and leave it sat on my hard drive.