Chapter one:
Eternally Finished
"No!" Willow whimpered into Tara's hair. "No." She couldn’t turn away from the sight of Buffy’s body, her best friend, their hero. Willow closed her eyes, trying to stop the tears threatening to overflow her eyes. Eyes that had seen so much in their short life, now seeing this, it was exhausting.
Carefully laying Tara down on the floor, Willow dropped to her knees, not paying attention to the glass shards cutting into her skin. It was just added pain, trivial compared to what she was feeling. Oh goddess please, please let this be a nightmare! Please! Willow begged silently.
The past few years flashed before her eyes. From the first day of school, to Angel, Faith, Oz, and college they had been together. Xander, Buffy and she were the first Scoobies, the Three Musketeers. Now just two of the original group remained.
She loved Anya with her sexual obsession and Tara as more than her friend, but without Buffy, the whole demon world was set free, and this scared her more than anything.
Tara moaned slightly drawing Willow’s attention. Looking down at her love, Willow made a silent vow. I must stay strong for Tara. I must. Straightening slightly on her knees with this new thought in mind, adrenaline rushed through her. Still kneeling with Tara lying next to her, Willow looked for the first time at the others.
Xander was hunched over a small pile of rubble staring at Buffy with a look of pain, his hand on his knee as if trying not to crumble to the ground. Next to him, Anya had her hands over her eyes, shaking her head in disbelief. Looking up at Xander through her hands Anya mouthed the words everyone was thinking, why? And Dawn, she was collapsed on the floor her hands resting on a broken metal beam, just staring at them, her own silent tears pouring down her face.
Dawnie! This isn’t right. I have to tell her it’s not her fault! Willow thought, standing with the intention of going to Dawn. A swift movement behind Dawn distracted her. Willow peered behind Dawn’s fallen body to see something she had never thought possible. Something going against everything, Giles had told them about the demon world. Spike was on his knees, his face in his hands, crying.
Willow stared at their ex- mortal enemy with disbelief and sympathy. Realizing, for the first time, something that had been going on since before her spell. He really cared about Buffy. He always has. I have to help him. Were the first thoughts flashing through her mind. No. Dawn needs me, then Spike. Turning back to Dawn she saw Xander had his arms around her whispering in her ear.
Willow paused looking at Dawn and Xander, then Tara whom Anya was softly trying to console. She felt torn between two people that needed her. It would have been funny if the circumstances were different. Choosing between Dawn and Spike should have been easy . . . the funny part was that it wasn’t. Both needed her and both had lost someone they loved.
A loud sob came from Spike and Willow made up her mind. Dawn is safe with Xander and Anya is helping Tara. Running over to Spike, She placed a hand on his arm so she wouldn’t startle him. “Spike” Willow said quietly. His response was a strangled gasp. "Red?" Spike asked questionably after a moment.
"Shhh." Willow whispered. “shh it’s gonna be all right."
Spike raised his head. Willow gasped at the look of defeat and anguish that clouded his blue eyes.
"Spike . . . its okay." She said looking at his red swollen eyes, tears dripping down his face. Spike just shook his head.
"It really is." Willow said, while thinking. I hope. For all our sakes.
Spike buried his face in his hands again, while his whole body racked with sobs. Willow felt the pain coming off him in waves. Throwing caution to the wind, Willow wrapped her arms around the shaking vampire. " s... sh...she... she’s gone." Spike whispered through his hands.
Willow’s heart broke that moment. . Spike had exactly what they had thought vampires couldn’t have, emotions. He felt pain and love. The strongest of all emotions, the most powerful. He was feeling what they were feeling. Willow tightened her arms around Spike. He’s more human than we realized. She thought with shock. All this time and he’s not a monster. He’s helped us and saved us and now at his lowest, he is truly a man."
Willow gazed down at her ex- enemy and possible friend and felt equal. She realized that they felt the same pain.
Another sob from Spike shook her from her daze. Willow rubbed his back lightly as if trying to erase all the hurt. “She’s rrr...really gone, finished, eternally." Willow opened her mouth to comfort him, when he went on. “She’ll never dance in the sunlight or laugh at one of the whelp’s jokes or stake another vamp or..." A fresh wave of tears started to overflow his eyes.
Spike shook his head trying to contain his grief and his tears. Willow smiled sadly at Spike trying to compose himself. It meant that he just might be okay. "Its okay, whatever happens next we’ll go through it ...together."
Spike looked at her sharply. Then, slowly softening. "Do you really mean it Red?" He asked with a raw, hopeful look behind his eyes.
Willow nodded “I really mean it." She was in awe that after all they had done to him, he still trusted them. “We were going to kill him when Glory kidnapped and tortured him and yet he didn’t tell her anything, he treats Dawn like an adult yet he worries about her and protects her." Willow thought with a small smile. There were many layers to the Vampire that she hoped she would uncover.
Spike saw the smile and immediately felt anger toward Willow, that the witch could feel happy when her best friend was laying dead just feet away... was horrible.
Not that I of all people should be thinking about being horrible. Spike thought, his anger toward the Witch slowly evaporating. Now he only felt anger toward himself. I could have saved Dawn and Buffy if only I had been faster, if I had grabbed his arm or if I had..."
As soon as Dawn popped into her head Willow straightened to look for the girl that was like her little sister.
Xander had straightened Dawn up on her feet holding her by the arms because she looked like she was going to collapse and was whispering in her ear. Tara was standing with the help of Giles...
Willow hadn’t noticed Giles standing near Buffy’s body because she had been to worried for Tara. Giles was now holding Buffy’s body in his arms and walking toward the exit of the construction site.
Willow looked back down at Spike who was still staring at her with a thankful look on his face. When he noticed Willow was looking at him, Spike hid it under a blank mask. He didn’t feel like he could hold his smirk right now.
" Ta Red. Don’t know what I’ll do now..." Spike sighed. "Better help the whelp, doesn’t look like Nibblet can walk and donut boy probably can’t carry her."
With these words Spike pushed himself off the ground and walked over to Xander and Dawn. After exchanging words with Xander, Spike picked the distraught girl up in his arms. Cradling her like a baby he set off following Giles.
Willow stood up as well after Spike and Dawn had left and took in for the first time their surroundings. Were the tower had been was now just splinters of wood, metal beams and blood. The large warehouse was half destroyed and a few bodies were lying on the wreckage. Willow sighed and ran over to Tara and Anya.
"Is she okay?" Willow asked Anya. "A bit bruised but she’ll make it." Anya replied wiping tears off her face. “I’m fine." Tara insisted quietly. "Really." Willow nodded. “We’ll help you just in case, okay?" Tara nodded back and allowed Willow to place her arm around her.
”Let’s go?" Anya asked in an uncharacteristically meek voice.
"Ya, I think we should." Willow replied.
Both girls helping Tara, started walking slowly toward the exit. As they limped along, Tara looked at Willow and asked “Is Spike okay? He looked really hurt and his aura was filled with grief...I felt the pain."
Willow sighed "I think he’s broken inside but I think he will be strong for Dawn’s sake."
Tara had a ghost of a smile on her lips." Good. She needs him... we need him, Buffy needed him."
A/N: Soo there it is wooohoooo!
Author's Chapter Notes:
I was thinking, after I watched The Gift for like the millionth time and I was all, “what if Willow saw Spike crying over Buffy at the end? What would have gone differently?” So I wrote this. It might not be like really long, but I don’t know yet. My plots usually turn out to be long when I wanted them to be short . . . so expect the unexpected , enjoy!
PS: This is going to be different from what really happened in the series. Sorry if there is any confusion.
PS: This is going to be different from what really happened in the series. Sorry if there is any confusion.