“This is stupid.”
“You’re stupid.”
She turned to look at him, putting one hand on her hip. “Excuse me?”
“Nothing,” he mumbled.
“That’s what I thought.” She started walking again and he pursed his lips in anger.
“Bint.”
“I can hear you!”
“Yeah? Good!” Spike had officially stopped caring.
Buffy took a deep breath and counted to three before turning around yet again.
“You seem to have something you want to say to me. I suggest you say it to my face.”
Spike took three long strides and stood so close to her, she had to quickly look down to make sure their bodies weren’t touching.
“I understand that your mum is on the mend but I think I speak for everyone when I say you have been one foul, pain in the ass for the last week. No wonder soldier boy is playing Houdini so much lately.”
“He is not!”
“Oh?”
“Shut up, Spike.” Buffy’s fist clenched and she could feel her cheeks begin to burn.
Spike looked down and smirked. “Ah, the old Slayer stand-by. Don’t like what I have to say, so you’ll punch me for it. Love that.”
“I swear to God I am going to…move!”
Before he knew what was happening, she shoved him to the ground and was furiously working her fists into a Muvado demon.
“Fanfuckingtastic,” he mumbled. If there was one thing he truly hated, it was a Muvado demon. He jumped up with ease and watched her. He knew he should help but watching her beat something up was just as entertaining. For as klutzy as she could be in her everyday life, her stealth in battle was something to behold.
“Seriously? You’re…going…to…stand…there?” She accentuated every word with a punch and he could tell she was mightily pissed off, which, if he had to be honest, was exactly how he loved her.
Er, liked her.
Oh, hell, who was he fooling?
“Yeah, actually, kind of was.”
“Could you not?” Her voice was dripping with sweetness but there was an underlying message of “stake meet Spike” there that he couldn’t ignore.
“It’s not so stupid now, is it, Slayer?”
She looked at him briefly, a look of pure hatred in her eye and that was it for her hold on the demon. It quickly saw her distraction and used it against her. It easily picked her up and lifted her over its head.
“Spike!”
“I’m working on it,” he said as he walked purposefully over to the demon. Getting within two feet of the thing, Spike remembered quite clearly why he hated Muvados. They smelled. A lot.
The Muvado threw Buffy to the ground and either said something or laughed in Spike’s direction. He couldn’t tell and he didn’t speak Muvado. He didn’t feel the need to ever learn because he wanted that one time in Texas to be the last time he came across one of these things.
He punched him in the same manner that Buffy had, knowing that if you struck the right spot, it would die. He wondered if Buffy had learned that in all her Slayer studies. It would be fairly sloppy of Giles if he hadn’t told her the quickest and most sufficient way to kill the thing. If only Spike could remember where –
“Hit it on the left side, off-center. It’s there somewhere,” Buffy told him as she hoisted herself off the ground, clutching her side.
“I know what to do.”
“Then you should probably do it.”
Spike moved his fist lower and struck as hard as he could, pure determination on his face. Buffy found herself too busy watching him fight than to help him. She had never noticed how involved he got into the fight before. It was just like when she fought. She could tell there was one single thought in his head and she felt a little tingle in her stomach. She shook it off as best she could but when she saw the muscle in his jaw twitch, there was a full-on flip that made her extremely uncomfortable.
She didn’t know what to do about that so she did the only thing she could, she ran headfirst back into the scuffle.
“Move!” She pushed him again and quickly jabbed the Muvado on the right side. When it bent, leaving its left side unprotected, she punched it right below the diaphragm…or whatever it was that they had. She couldn’t be expected to remember the names of demon innards, could she?
It fell to its knees and Buffy took a step back and quickly and with as much force as she could muster, kicked the demon in the same spot. The Muvado fell to its side and began to convulse.
“Uh, what’s happening?”
Spike stood beside her and watched; his brow furrowed. “I’m not even going to wager a guess.”
“You told Giles you killed this kind of demon before, remember? That’s why we’re doing this…together.”
“I killed it, luv. I didn’t stick around to study it. I’m not morbid like you.”
“I am not morbid! I like to finish a job, Spike. I like to make sure that when I set out to kill something, I actually, you know, kill it!”
“Are you implying that I do shoddy work?”
“I’m implying that - “ Buffy stopped and looked down at the demon. “It stopped.”
“It’s dead.”
“Check.”
“No way, Slayer. You’re the efficient one. You check.”
“You smell.”
“Nice comeback...sissy.”
Buffy rolled her eyes. “I’m being literal.”
Spike huffed. “Yeah, you’re not smelling of roses, either, princess.”
“Just check the stupid thing!”
“I am not your vampire slave, Slayer! You check the sodding thing if you want to know if you killed it.”
“Fine, you big wuss.”
“You wreck me, Slayer, with your cutting use of words.”
Buffy ignored him and leaned down to do what she wasn’t exactly sure yet. All she knew was that the smell intensified the closer she got and she had to hold her breath.
“Slayer?”
“Shut it.”
“Slayer, I think maybe you should – “
She turned to him. “Spike, when I want you to say something, I’ll ask you a question, until then shut – EW!”
“I tried to tell you,” Spike said with a laugh.
Buffy slowly stood and as she wiped the slime from her cheeks, she heard a noise that didn’t make her feel any better.
“I think…it’s going to blow,” she told Spike.
“Oh, pet, I think it already did.”
Buffy took a few steps back and waited. There was only a little slime coming from the ruptured spot on its chest but yet, she couldn’t shake the feeling that it wasn’t over.
“You said you didn’t wait around when you killed the other one, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Giles told me something about when you kill it and I just can’t remember – “
“That it’ll spew slime on its killer just as she’s stupidly bending over it to make sure its dead?”
“You know what, Spike?”
“What, Slayer?”
She punched him in the nose as an answer. She knew he understood that better than words.
“Ow,” he said slowly. “Not necessary.”
“Totally necessary.”
He came at her and she ducked out the way, sweeping her leg out and knocking him down within inches of the demon.
“This thing reeks more dead than alive.”
“Same could be said for you.”
“You’re killing me, Slayer.”
“Not yet but we could probably work – “
She stopped talking when Spike held up his index finger. She crossed her arms over her chest and waited.
“What?”
“I thought I heard something.”
“From the dead demon?”
“Now’s not the time to be a wise-ass, luv.”
“According to you, it’s always the time.”
He gave her a dirty look and she rolled her eyes again and sighed heavily, not hiding her annoyance. Why did she always give him a hard time? Why couldn’t she just be quiet when he asked? How did she get under his skin so easily?
He obviously knew how. He just didn’t like it.
A loud hissing noise brought his thoughts back to the situation at hand.
“That’s probably not a good thing,” Buffy ventured.
“No flies on you.”
“I really hate that expression. It makes no sense. What does it mean, exactly?”
“Now? You want to have this discussion now with the spewing, hissing demon corpse?” He shook his head and muttered, “Brilliant.”
“I’m just saying – “ Buffy stopped herself and Spike watched her eyes grow as large as saucers.
“What?”
Buffy could only point and he turned back to look at the dead demon on the ground. He mimicked Buffy’s expression as he watched the small hole widen until its chest was a completely open cavern. He slowly stood and moved closer to Buffy.
“If something Alien-like jumps out of its chest, you are on your own, pet.”
“Look inside.”
“Uh, no,” Spike answered.
“Chicken.”
“You think that’ll get me to do it?”
“Yes,” she answered him matter-of-factly.
“You are your own kind of special, aren’t you?”
“No one else like me,” Buffy said, proudly.
“No, no there is not,” Spike agreed. She looked at him in surprise and he coughed, turning away from her.
He stood over the demon and looked down into its empty chest. He really didn’t want to get any closer than this but from where he was, he couldn’t see anything.
He shrugged. “Maybe this is how it decomposes.”
“I’m taking best case scenario for two hundred, Alex.”
“Right,” he concurred. “Maybe you should get Giles.”
“We’re not exactly close to the Magic Box.” She paused, thinking. “Maybe we should just leave it? Like you did that time?”
“I thought you wanted to make sure it was dead. Isn’t that what you had your panties in a bunch about not ten minutes ago?”
She glared at him. “Do you ever not talk?”
“Do you ever come down off that high horse of yours?”
“Just because I’m better than you, that doesn’t mean I’m on a high horse.”
“Oh, luv, I think that’s the very definition. Snooty? Check. Superiority complex? Check. Complete and utter bitch? Check, check, check. Add them up and you get high horse.”
“I loathe you.”
“The feeling is mutual. Believe me.”
“I’m going. I don’t need to put up with this. You can take care of the Movado on your own.”
“Muvado, Slayer. Movado is an expensive kind of watch.”
“Whatever.”
“Whatever,” Spike teased. “You’re full of that good, ole’ Slayer wit tonight.”
She breathed deeply, trying to calm down and that was her first mistake because everywhere smelled like slimy dead demon. She began to cough, not able to catch a clean breath.
“You all right, Slayer?” She shook her head quickly and he tried to remember what to do if someone started choking besides point and laugh. “Hands over your head!”
She did as he said and he lightly tapped her on the back. She slowly was able to breathe again but not without the stench.
“I can’t take the smell anymore.”
“I agree. Even I’m beginning to get high off the fumes.”
“Well, what should we do?”
“I vote to leave it.”
“Figures,” Buffy said. “Why I thought you would come up with an actual solution is beyond me.”
“Leaving it is an actual solution. Don’t ask a question if you don’t want an answer.” He reached into his pocket for a cigarette and continued, “You just said we should leave it!”
She watched him light the cigarette and take that first drag. He closed his eyes, seeming so content. His tongue came out of his mouth just a tiny bit and she couldn’t look away. She knew she had to but she just couldn’t.
“I don’t understand you. You’re a crazy bird, you know that? If it’s not one thing, it’s another with you. You’re never satisfied by anything. You drive me right around the bend.”
Buffy shook her head and asked, “What?”
“Now you’re not even giving me the courtesy of listening to me? Way to make a man feel like – “
“Spike!” Buffy yelled, cutting him off. “Shh! Please, for the love of all things, do not say another word.”
He opened his mouth and she gave him such a stern look of disapproval that he immediately snapped it shut.
“Listen.”
They both looked at the Muvado demon and waited. Spike looked at her in surprise when he heard the low groaning. She crooked an eyebrow in question and he shrugged his shoulders in response.
“I wish I could remember what Giles said,” Buffy whispered.
“Might be important right about now.”
“Do you know how much information he gives you in one session? It’s hard to remember every little thing.”
“I think remembering what happens to this thing after you kill it is not so little.”
“Well, maybe if you had actually stuck around the first time you killed one of these things, we would know!”
At that, the dead demon in question exploded and sent Buffy and Spike sailing. Spike fell on his back, hitting his head hard on the ground. Buffy landed half on his body, half on the ground and felt her arm twist in the wrong direction.
She moved her arm, grimaced at the pain and looked over to where the demon had been. There was now a small hole in the ground and demon parts were everywhere, including on her and Spike.
“So I guess that’s what happens,” she said. “And may I add an ew because, really, that’s just gross.”
“I need a shower.”
“Second that. Demon guts aren’t exactly the cutting edge in fashion.”
“Don’t suppose you could help a vampire out?”
Buffy laughed, short and quick, stopping when she realized he was serious. “How to answer that question? Does a simple no suffice?”
“I saved your ass, Slayer! And I wouldn’t be covered in Muvado if we had just left like I originally suggested.”
“First of all, you did not ‘save my ass’. You distracted me with being you and it took advantage of that fact. Secondly…secondly…” She tried to think of another reason to not let him use her shower but she had to admit, to herself only, that he wasn’t exactly wrong.
“Can’t think of anything, can you? Because you know I’m right.”
“Don’t gloat,” she warned, still thinking. Smiling, she told him, “And secondly, I only have one shower at the moment. The other is clogged thanks to Dawn’s never ending hair.”
“We could always – “
“Finish that sentence and you’ll be a shower of ash.”
Spike sat up and raised his hands in surrender. “Bloke can’t even make a joke.”
“An inappropriate joke while I’m covered in demon? Not the best way to go.”
“Sorry,” he murmured and she was surprised yet again.
Buffy sighed. “Fine. Let’s go.”
Spike perked up and smiled.
“Don’t get too excited,” she told him, quickly. “You’re in and you’re out. No hot chocolate, no telly, none of it.”
“Your mum won’t mind? Or Dawn?”
“She’s still…in the hospital and Dawn’s with her, not that either of them would care anyway. They like you for some strange reason.”
She walked away from him and he couldn’t help the broad grin that broke out on his face and the slight skip in his step as he followed her back to Revello Drive.
*****************************
Buffy groaned in misery as she peeled her soiled clothes from her body. Another jacket ruined. Another pair of jeans designated to the “Slaying Only” pile that was beyond out of control. She knew she should just wear sweats but by now it was just as much a challenge to not get anything on her clothes. However, if she had remembered what Giles had told her about the Muvado, she would have worn sweats and a raincoat.
She turned the shower on and ran her fingers under the water to check the temperature. She couldn’t wait to get under the hot water and wash away that hunt. It was too messy and a little too annoying. She was relishing the quiet –
“Hey!” She heard Spike’s voice yell through the door. “Don’t you be using all the hot water. Just ‘cause I’m dead, doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy a nice hot one.”
“You’ll get what you get!”
“Can I turn on the telly?”
Buffy sighed. “Sure, whatever. Go away!”
She quickly got in the shower so she couldn’t hear whatever else he felt the need to say. She loved the noise of the shower and how it made her feel like she was nestled away in her own little cocoon. She didn’t get a lot of chances to relax in the shower without Dawn barging in or having to go kill some demon or her mom asking her to do yet another chore. It was a luxury she appreciated but she couldn’t help feeling guilty about liking it.
Thinking of her mom made her think of Joyce’s last night in the house before her operation. The fact that all the chaos of the Queller happened a week ago amazed Buffy. Joyce was still in the hospital and, hopefully, would be coming home soon. She knew about Dawn and that was such a large burden off of Buffy’s shoulders. She felt like life could finally get back to normal again…or, at least, as normal as her life could be.
Spike’s comment about Riley floated through her mind and she frowned. She would never tell Spike that he wasn’t too far off. Buffy was surprised by how little she had seen Riley since her mom became sick. She was even more shocked and, frankly, dismayed when he burst through her front door with his old Initiative buddies. She was sure that Riley was just as surprised to see Spike at her house, helping her. Helping her up from the floor. Helping her up from the floor and letting his hand linger in hers…
She tried not to think about that for the last week but the truth was she had. It was hard not to. Not because there was some insane, electrical charge between them – she had touched him enough times over their four year acquaintance to recognize when that happened. It was something different that she had become aware of that night. She had – dare she even think it – felt a sense of comfort from the simple act. He had her back, he helped her and he was there for her when she needed someone – twice now since her mom became ill. She didn’t even want to think about the fact that the same couldn’t be said for her boyfriend.
Why would Spike help her? Not just tonight or last week, but even that night of show and tell when he had obviously come to her house to try and kill her. He didn’t have to sit with her and be there if she felt the need to talk. She didn’t and neither did he, which was a minor miracle but still. It was these little things that Spike had been doing lately that had her wondering what he was up to.
The thing that scared her the most was that she didn’t think he was up to anything. Anything evil, at least.
**********************************************
Buffy found Spike in the kitchen, sitting at the island with not one, but two cups of hot chocolate. She felt the corners of her mouth lift and she quickly shook it off.
“I thought I told you no hot chocolate.” She found it easier to be bitchy than to be nice to him. Plus, it’s what he expected from her.
“I made you one, too. Thanks wouldn’t kill you, Slayer.”
“Not me, no,” Buffy said, pointedly.
Spike turned to her and stopped short when he saw her in her pajamas and a bathrobe. Her hair was still wet and the scent of her shampoo filled his senses. He needed to look away before she took offense and staked his dead self right then and there but he just couldn’t. It was a risk he was willing to take at this point.
“What?” she asked, her brow wrinkling which he found completely…evil help him, adorable.
He shook his head. “Nothing. Did you leave me any hot water?”
“I waited until it got luke warm so you should be fine.”
“Luv, luke warm and hot are actually two different things.”
“Oh, I’m well aware.” She cocked her eyebrow and looked him hard in the eye.
He smirked, knowing that she did it on purpose. The girl complained a lot about hating evil things but she wasn’t too far off. He thought of paying her back with one of the many insults regarding her boytoy and temperature but he resisted, as he actually did need to take a shower and he’d be damned if he waited all this time to get kicked out now.
She kept looking at him, as if she was trying to egg him on and he wasn’t going to back down. He stared right back, giving as good as he was getting. Buffy didn’t intend for this to turn into a staring contest but now that it was on, she couldn’t give up. He would never shut up about it if she did. She thought it would be the easiest fight she would be in with Spike but the more they stared at each other, the more she felt the situation beginning to change.
She started to feel warm, much too warm, and her face flushed; her ears burned. She quickly licked her lips not even realizing that it took all of Spike’s will power not to watch her tongue sweep across her lips. He breathed harder not realizing that she was wondering if he was feeling the same tightness in his chest as she was feeling in hers. She wondered if that were even possible because she knew exactly what it was and she didn’t like it. It meant things she didn’t want to explore; things she couldn’t explore. She breathed out and noticed that her breath was a little too shaky when she exhaled.
She hoped he hadn’t noticed; he had.
He stood and took a step closer to her. Her hand went to the counter top when she felt a bit dizzy but she still didn’t break eye contact and neither did he. He took two more steps to her and she inhaled deeply and held it, needing something to concentrate on other than the blue eyes before her. She had to look away but she couldn’t and he felt exactly the same way, except he didn’t care as much as she did. He wasn’t bothered by what could happen or the why it was happening. He could see it plain as day on her face; in the set of eyes he had been staring into for the last few minutes.
Ring!
Buffy exhaled quickly and grabbed the phone next to her hand. With a shaky voice she answered it and when she heard Dawn’s voice, she finally broke away from Spike’s gaze.
Spike frowned when Buffy looked away and turned from him. That ringing was now in the top five cruelest moments in Spike’s life. He was so close. Even if she had come to her senses and staked him on the spot, he would have a least known what it would be like to kiss her, to feel her lips on his. He would have known that she wanted it, too. There was no spell from Red and there was nothing special about the demon guts they had been covered with earlier. It would have been pure desire and he knew that she would protest until she turned blue but she couldn’t fool him.
“Are you okay?” He heard Buffy ask and at first he thought she was speaking to him. When she continued to talk, he realized his mistake. He watched her profile as she spoke and he noticed the slight changes as the conversation went on. He couldn’t remember the last time he saw her smile – genuinely smile – and he was extremely happy that he was there when it happened. She looked at him briefly but continued her conversation like nothing had happened.
That didn’t come as much of a surprise to Spike.
What did was when she hung up.
“That was my mom.”
“How’s she feeling?” he asked and not out of obligation. By the slight smile on Buffy’s lips, he knew she realized that.
“Better. As good as one can when they’ve cracked open your skull and removed a tumor the size of a baby carrot.”
“Thank Christ I don’t eat carrots.”
“Tell me about.”
“Nibblet with her?”
“Yeah, but Willow and Tara were taking her for the night because…of the demon.”
“That we’ve already killed.”
“What’s this ‘we’ business?” She laughed a little and she wouldn’t deny that it felt really nice. “I love my sister but – “
“The quiet’s nice, too.”
“Exactly.”
They stood in the kitchen not saying anything for a few minutes. Buffy shifted from one foot to the other and Spike couldn’t keep his arms still.
“So – “ Buffy began but Spike had started talking, as well. “What?”
“You can go.”
“No, please.”
Spike’s eyebrow went up at that and Buffy rolled her eyes at him. He was glad that hadn’t changed.
“If it’s all right with you, I’m going to take that shower now.”
“Oh, yeah, it’s perfectly fine. I mean, yes, that’s what you’ve been waiting for so, of course,” she stammered.
Spike couldn’t help thinking that wasn’t the only thing he had been waiting for but he didn’t say so. Instead, he replied, “Maybe that luke warm is now back to hot.”
Buffy blushed and she silently cursed herself for it. She didn’t want to feel all tingly when he said the word “hot” and yet…there was no stopping the “tingle of doom”, as she had taken to calling it.
She nodded. “Yeah, maybe.”
“Sorry to ruin your evil plan.”
“I am not evil.”
“Whatever you say, pet, but I know it when I see it and you – “ he leaned into her, barely putting his body on hers, and whispered in her ear, “have that twinkle.”
The soft tone of his voice gave Buffy goose bumps. He was too close for comfort and she needed to move away from him but she was rooted to the spot she stood in.
He moved past her without another word and she could hear him whistle as he went up the stairs. She exhaled loudly and fell against the wall, feeling completely drained.
What the hell was he up to and why the hell wasn’t she kicking him out for it?
**********************************
The shower was worth the wait and the water was definitely hot enough for Spike. He was still having trouble processing the fact that he was in Buffy’s shower and that he didn’t have to sneak in when no one was home like he usually did. He knew he was playing a dangerous game; that she could get really pissed off quite easily and show him the pointy end of a stake but she didn’t seem to mind. And that was providing him with a serious mindfuck. Out of all the things he thought would happen when he started playing, her not being able to retaliate had not been one of them.
Maybe she was off her game. Maybe the fight was out of her. Her mom was sick and he saw firsthand how that had affected her. It was the real reason why he volunteered to help her fight the Muvado. He knew she could handle herself in a fight but she was devastated and he knew what that could be like and what it could do to you. He wasn’t going to let her slip and end up dead at the hands of some smelly, gooey demon.
The thing that surprised him most was that she was actually talking to him. When she told him who had called, he was shocked. She had no reason to tell him who it was and telling him seemed like she was offering an explanation. And that couldn’t be, could it? She couldn’t feel…obligated to explain why their moment was interrupted? That would be crazy. And he would obviously be crazy for thinking such a thing but he just couldn’t shake it. They didn’t converse. Not like they had been just a few short minutes ago.
It would be in his best interest not to question it. If she was actually feeling any good will towards him, he shouldn’t jinx it in any way. But he had been waiting so long for anything, for any sign that she could at the very least tolerate him and now that it had finally presented itself, he didn’t want to let it go. She hadn’t said anything about their little staring contest but he knew that she was affected by it. He’d been alive long enough to know when he was working his magic. He just didn’t know why it was actually working tonight.
“Spike?” Buffy asked, through the door.
“Yeah?”
“There aren’t any towels left so I just wanted to let you know that I put a couple outside the door.”
“You can bring them in.”
“Um, no, that’s okay.”
Spike laughed and shook his head. “Can’t come in without taking a peak? I understand, pet.”
“That is not true.”
“Whatever you want to keep telling yourself, Slayer, that’s fine by me. “ He heard the door open and he smiled.
“I put them on the counter. You can just leave them in here when you’re done, okay?”
He pulled the curtain back a couple of inches and said, “You want me to walk around naked?”
“Naked?” Buffy asked, looking up into the mirror, her eyes wide. She kept her back to him and fussed with the folded towels.
“My clothes aren’t exactly clean.”
“So what were you planning on wearing?”
“I was hoping that I could wash them and – “
“And what? Walk around my house in a towel?” Buffy tried to keep the panic she was feeling out of her voice but it wasn’t working too well.
“If you insist.”
“No! I don’t insist! In fact, I think you should just get out of the shower now and leave because I can not do this anymore. I don’t know what I was thinking! I don’t know why I thought you could actually be like a human being and just use the shower without causing all sorts of problems!”
“Whatever you say, luv.” Spike shut off the shower and pulled open the curtain.
Buffy heard the rings move along the rod but she turned to look at Spike, anyway, convinced that he wouldn’t just open the shower curtain and stand there…completely naked…which he was.
“Oh my god!” Buffy yelped and turned back to the towels.
“Since you’re there, could you hand me a towel?”
“No!”
“I thought you didn’t want me walking around in my birthday suit.”
“I don’t want you walking around. Period!”
Spike moved behind her and Buffy looked up into the mirror in front of them. He reached around her and grabbed a towel.
“Want to help me tie it on?” he asked, his mouth grazing her ear.
“What…” she paused, catching her breath, “What do you think you’re doing?”
“I don’t think I’m being mysterious about it, pet.”
“Don’t do that. Don’t call me names like we’re a name calling couple.”
“We call each other names all the time.”
“Not of endearment.”
“To you, maybe.”
“Slayer is a term of endearment?”
“And respect.”
“Please,” she huffed, but Spike saw the little smile that went along with the eye roll. She moved away from him and walked to the door. “You need to leave.”
“You need me to leave. Bit of a difference.”
“Don’t argue semantics with me, Spike. It doesn’t matter. You need to go.”
“Why? Don’t like what’s happening?”
“And what exactly do you think is happening?”
“You want me.”
Buffy’s mouth dropped and she shook her head but said nothing.
“And you know I want you.”
“This is ridiculous.”
“Why?”
“Why, Spike? Because we’re mortal enemies! We don’t want anything but to see the other one dead.”
“Not true.”
“A couple of weeks ago you came to my house with a shotgun, Spike! Something isn’t right here. Maybe there’s something wacky in the demon blood.”
“No.”
“You don’t know!”
“I know.”
“How? Since when are you an expert on the Goo Monster? You didn’t even know it was going to explode!”
“Because I’ve been – “ Spike stopped himself. This was going further than he had intended. He didn’t think the truth would go over too well.
“What, Spike? You’ve been acting strange for weeks now. I’m not just talking about that weird moment behind the Bronze when it seemed like…like you were – “
“Going to kiss you?”
“Yeah, but you weren’t.”
“I wasn’t?”
“No?”
“Very much the opposite, Slayer.”
“Oh,” Buffy sighed. “Why? I mean you hate me. It’s been decided. For years! We hate each other. We like it that way.”
“Something changed,” Spike said, shrugging, trying to make it seem as unimportant as he could.
“What does that mean?”
“Nothing. It means absolutely nothing.” He leaned against the counter and Buffy slumped against the closed door.
“Do you,” Buffy began but stopped. She couldn’t ask him. She didn’t think she wanted to know the answer.
“Yes.”
“You don’t know what I was going to – “
“Do I have feelings for you? Yes. Are you all I think about because I can’t sleep and even when I can get a minutes rest, you’re there? Yes. Do I think you’ll put a sharp wooden object into me now? Absolutely. Do I care anymore? No.”
Buffy opened her mouth to say something – anything – but just closed it again because she couldn’t. She couldn’t even wrap her brain around anything he was saying and she wasn’t sure she wanted to. She didn’t know what to do. She thought she should turn around and leave him to himself. By not saying anything, she wouldn’t encourage this insanity. But maybe if she didn’t say anything, he would think she felt the same and just couldn’t admit it. She was back at square one and she hated square one.
“I think maybe you’re confused,” Buffy ventured. “Maybe with the chip – “
“Chip’s nothing, Slayer.”
“You’ve wanted me dead for years! If it isn’t the chip then – “
“You think because the chip won’t let me kill you that I decided this would be a better option?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Just ‘cause I wanted you dead didn’t mean I didn’t want you, Slayer. It’s the nature of the beast.”
“What beast? You being a vampire and me being the Slayer? That’s supposed to mean that we…that you…want something…more?”
“Don’t get me wrong, pet. I love a good row with you but that only fuels the fire.”
“So you are actually going to try and tell me that you’ve had these…feelings…for a while now?”
Spike shrugged. “Does it matter?”
“Yes!”
“Why? Knowing the answer to that won’t change anything.”
“That’s not the point, Spike.”
“Then tell me, Slayer, what is the point?” He walked towards her and she held up her hand, shaking her head. “Don’t want me coming any closer?”
“You take every little thing and turn it into something else.”
“No, I take every little thing and bring out the truth in it. You just don’t like that.”
“You make it into what you want the truth to be, Spike. Not what is the truth.”
“We’re obviously going to have to agree to disagree on that point.”
“No, you’re going to agree with me.”
“Why? Because all your little Slayerettes do?”
“They do not! Giles never agrees with me.”
Spike took another step toward her and she took a deep breath and held it.
“You look nervous.”
“I’m not nervous. I’m uncomfortable.”
“Turn around and leave then.”
“We’re in the middle of something and I want to make sure we resolve it before anything else is done.”
“It seems to me that you’re just delaying because you like me in my little towel.”
Buffy rolled her eyes. “You wish.”
“Don’t need to wish, pet. It’s clear as day.”
“Fine, I’m going,” she said and quickly turned around, putting her hand on the door knob. She pulled and Spike’s arm shot out and slammed it shut again. “Back away from me, Spike. I’m not kidding.”
“You don’t scare me, Slayer.”
Buffy turned her head and he was right there. She hated how stealthy he could be. She hadn’t even heard him come up behind her and she certainly didn’t think he was only an inch away from her. All of her. She wiped her damp palms on her pants and she felt flustered yet again. She looked down at his lips, which slowly formed into his trademark smirk that she always wanted to wipe right off his face. Firmly. With her fist.
“You know what, Spike?”
“What, Slayer?” he whispered.
She turned quickly and pushed him against the wall. Her hands grabbed his upper arms and held him. Before she could even think not to, her lips were on his. Spike groaned which only spurred her on and she slipped her tongue into his mouth. He broke free from her grasp and his hand went to her hair, keeping her mouth against his. His other hand slid down her side to her backside and pushed her tightly against him.
She tried to move her lips away but Spike kept her there. She was trying to breathe and kiss Spike and she forgot what it could be like to kiss a vampire who didn’t have to do both. She put her hands on his chest and pushed away, taking deep breaths.
“Do it and get it over with.”
“Huh?” she asked, genuinely confused.
“Punching me in the face. Let’s just get it over with. Beat me up for something I didn’t do. Blame me for you kissing me.”
“I’m not going to punch you.”
“No?”
“No.”
“Well, all right then,” Spike said, smiling.
She smiled, too, but it didn’t meet her eyes and he knew she was already thinking of excuses as to why she kissed him. He wished she would just do what she wanted for once but, apparently, that would never be the case. Maybe it was his own ego he was stroking, but she seemed to be more her than she had been recently and he liked to believe it was partly his doing. She probably never would admit to that but it was okay that he thought it.
She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, still not looking at him. She opened her mouth to say something and closed it again, sighing. She shook her head, as if having a debate with herself and Spike just watched her, mildly amused by what he was seeing.
“You want to be left alone?” he asked.
“I –“ she began, before stopping.
“You?”
“I don’t know why I did that.”
“I do.”
“I’m sure you think you do.”
“No, luv, I’m sure I know exactly why you kissed me.”
“Because I wanted to? That’s what you’re going to say, right?”
“No, because I never thought you would admit to that.”
“I’m not,” she said, quickly. “I’m saying what you’re saying I would say.” She furrowed her brow. “That hurt my head.”
Spike laughed and said, “I was going to guess that you attacked me because you’re feeling out of sorts, as of late and you needed something to distract you. Believe me, I’m not complaining.”
“That sounds fairly – hey, I did not attack you.”
“Like a bear on a hunter, pet.”
She rolled her eyes. “I can get you a robe and you can wash your clothes.”
“Really?” he asked, surprised.
“Don’t be so shocked. I can be nice sometimes, you know. It’s in limited supply but I know how to be nice.”
“It’s not pink or frilly is it?”
Buffy just smiled and left the bathroom.
*******************************************************
“It’s not pink,” Buffy said as she gave him the once over.
“Where’s the sodding washer?”
“Come on.”
Spike followed Buffy down the stairs and tugged on the robe. It may not have been pink but it was short and thin – a little too thin for Spike’s tastes. The only thing it had going for it was that it was red. Spike tried to envision Buffy wearing it with maybe a matching negligee under it but then he thought of why she would have bought something like this in the first place and the sexiness of the idea vanished. It turned his stomach that she would be wasting such good lingerie on Commando boy.
“You do know how to use these, right?”
“What did Xander tell you?” he asked. Buffy looked at him like he was crazy. “Not really, no.”
“You are so weird,” she said. “Put your clothes up there. There’s some stain remover.”
“Probably not necessary.”
“Whatever. Demon guts do not come out. Trust me.”
“Fine.”
“I love when I win.” Buffy picked up the bottle and sprayed some on his shirt and jeans. “Put it in the machine, put in some detergent, close the lid, press start. Pretty easy, huh?”
“Sure.”
“Good so next time you do laundry, you shouldn’t shrink all your clothes and have to wear some tropical monstrosity and shorts.”
She giggled and he couldn’t help but smile despite his embarrassment.
“And, also, when you sneak in here to take showers, you can now wash your clothes, too.”
“How did – “
“When more towels were being used and thrown about and we realized it wasn’t Dawn being a slob, we put two and two together.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t say anything.”
“Mom didn’t see the big deal in it. I wanted to kick your ass for breaking and entering but she insisted that you weren’t hurting anything and to just pretend like we didn’t know.”
“Again I say…”
“She’s sick, Spike. I do whatever she tells me,” she said, quietly. He saw her shake it off before she continued. “Besides, like I told you before, she likes you for reasons that are beyond my comprehension.”
“Well, thanks for the pass. It’s appreciated.”
“What’s appreciated is if you washed your towels afterward. Really, Spike, how many do you need?”
His mouth opened to respond but when he saw the slow smile form on her lips, he didn’t bother. He returned the smile, feeling more at ease with Buffy than he ever had before. Even more so than when they were under that damn spell last year.
“About what happened in the bathroom,” Buffy began.
“The bathroom you practically mauled me in, Slayer? That bathroom?”
“Never mind,” she said and walked away. He quickly grabbed her arm and stopped her. “Let me go.”
“Sorry, luv. Can’t resist and I can’t believe you think I could. I’ll be good. Scout’s honor.”
She was skeptical but she nodded and he let go of her arm. She didn’t want to think about how she liked his hand there, his fingers pressing into her skin with just enough force to make her stop but not crossing a line that would probably make the chip fire off. She knew it wasn’t possible but it felt warm where his hand had been and that made her feel a little uneasy because that definitely said something about her body’s reaction to his. She had to start talking because she didn’t like thinking anymore.
“What you said upstairs…about me kissing you because I’m sad, that,” she paused, trying to find the right words and she sighed when she couldn’t, “that sounds bad. Like I’m this person who would – “
“I know you’re not.”
“But you even said that I act high and mighty all the time. That I think I’m better than everyone else.”
“And?”
“And…and I don’t want to be that person!”
“Well, buckle up, sweetheart, because you are.”
“I am not, Spike!”
“Luv, you’re the Slayer and I’d wager a certain amount of self-absorption goes along with it. And the uppity thing, well, I suspect that’s just you.”
Buffy snorted. “You always know just what to say to woo a girl, Spike.”
“Am I supposed to be wooing?”
She blushed and shook her head. “No, of course not. I didn’t mean it like that. You take everything and twist it around. It’s really very annoying.”
“You only get annoyed when I strike a nerve,” he told her, the smugness in his voice not going unnoticed by Buffy.
“Sometimes I hate you so much.”
“Those are usually the times when I’m spot on.”
She narrowed her eyes and studied him. He instantly didn’t like it. Normally, to even get her to notice him was a blessing but this…examination made him uncomfortable and it didn’t take him long to realize that this must be how she felt when he did it to her.
He sighed. “Fine, Summers, I hate you, too. Are you happy now?”
“I don’t think you do. Not anymore.” She bit her lip, thinking and it didn’t take him long to realize that she was debating whether to continue her thought.
“Slayer?”
“You don’t kiss me like you hate me,” she said quickly and quietly.
His eyes widened, surprised that she went through with it. He had no choice but to respond. “Same could be said for you, pet.”
“I suppose that’s true,” she agreed. She sighed and she was already tired of sighing. “Could you just not say anything that you would usually say right now? I just don’t think I could handle it.”
“Fair enough.”
“Really? No hard time?” Her pleasure at this made him smile.
“I’m always up for trying something new,” he told her with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders.
“Then I have an idea,” Buffy said, smiling that beautiful smile of hers that made him want to do anything she asked. She grabbed his hand and led him to the staircase. He could do nothing but follow.
******************************************
“If anyone ever found about this, I’d be the laughing stock of the demon community.”
“What do you mean you would be?”
“Funny, luv. Very funny.”
“It’s just a board game, Spike. It’s not like I’m looking for us to paint each other’s nails.”
He looked at his nails and made a face that suggested he was considering it.
Instead he said, “Exactly, it’s a board game, you’re the Slayer and I’m evil. Which of these things don’t bloody belong?”
He couldn’t play Monopoly. They didn’t even torment the sufferers in hell with that game. However, playing meant staying here for quite some time since it was never ending torture.
Her eyebrow went up in question. “You know, you keep talking all this ‘I’m evil’ talk and yet nothing you’ve done since you got that chip has been the least bit evil.”
“Shut your gob!”
She smiled at the look of horror on his face. She shrugged and said, “Just an observation. You help us, Spike, and you like it.”
“Take that back.”
“I most certainly will not.” She was studying him again and he shifted uncomfortably in the chair. “We’ll play any game you want if you answer me one question.”
“Any game?” He liked the sound of that.
“Within reason, of course.”
He didn’t like the sound of that but he went along with it. “Of course.” He swept his hand out in front of him for her to continue.
“Why do you help us?”
“Got nothing better to do.”
She rolled her eyes. “You could help demons. Face it, you help the white hats. So why? It’s not like we pay you…anymore.”
“Well, once you started tearing my money in half…” He chuckled at the memory. He was pissed that she did that but he admired the balls it took.
“Answer the question, Spike. Why do you help us?”
“First of all, let’s get a thing straight here right quick. I help you, not them.”
“Oh,” she breathed out.
He sat forward, his elbows resting on his knees and his hands in front of him, fingers entwined. He looked at her through his lashes as and she sat on the couch, waiting patiently for an answer. He figured the best thing to do would be to just tear the band-aid off and tell her. She’d never believe any bullshit reason he could come up with. As easily as he could break down all her excuses, she seemed to be doing the same to him tonight. He wasn’t so sure he liked the tables being turned.
“To be close to you,” he said so quickly she didn’t know if she heard him correctly but when he would not look at her, she knew that she had.
She took a deep breath and let it out slowly and said, “So…pick a game.”
His head shot up and he looked at her. When she gave a small nod and looked away, he ducked his head and smiled. Sometimes she surprised the ever loving hell out of him.
He looked at the games on the table and spotting one, smiled. He got out of the chair and grabbed it, opening it before she could protest.
“Could be interesting,” he commented.
She tried not to smile but failed miserably until one thought occurred to her. “You need to change because…no. Just no.”
“A house full of lovely ladies has some clothes for me?”
“I think Riley left a pair of pants and a shirt here.”
“Sod it, we’ll play Monopoly. I’m not wearing that blighter’s clothes.”
“Fine, don’t put on his clothes, don’t play any game and just leave. Way to be a brat and spoil the night, Spike.”
“Spoil the night, huh? I told you, Slayer, once you have me around and you get used to me, you wouldn’t be able to – “
“Don’t misunderstand me,” she began, a wry smile in place, “We made a deal.”
“That we did,” he agreed.
“And I like to keep my word.”
“As do I.”
“Good to know,” she mumbled as he grabbed the mat from the box and shook it out, lying it on the floor. She flicked the dial with her finger.
Right food red.
Could be interesting, indeed.
************************
Buffy couldn’t remember the last time she laughed this hard. She actually had tears rolling down her cheeks and for the first time in weeks, it wasn’t due to anything bad.
Or maybe it was. It depended on how you looked at the current situation.
“You’re the bloody Slayer, luv! This should be a walk in the park.”
“Look, Spike, I am bendy but I am not that bendy.”
Spike groaned at the thought and he heard her apologize for resting her weight on him. He wanted to laugh and tell her that all 90 pounds of her was nothing but he was enjoying the feeling of her so close to him that he didn’t dare say anything that she may take the wrong way.
“You’re in the way. It’s not possible to get my hand there.”
“So, are you telling me that you’re quitting?”
“No!” she answered quickly. “I just need to think of a solution.”
“Yes, Twister – the game of wits as it’s usually called.”
“Are you mocking me?” she asked but he could practically hear the smile in her voice.
“Slightly.”
“Well, as long as it’s only slightly,” she told him.
About fifteen minutes prior when there seemed to be another impossible move to do, he had asked her if she were quitting and she had really thought about it. But when he started to tease her for not being able to finish a simple game of Twister, she had to think of something to do and when she couldn’t, he, of course, did. He challenged her to a blind bet, knowing that the possibility of losing both Twister and a bet would get her going. And he was right and she knew he was playing her but tonight it didn’t bother her. It was all in good fun – she hoped. She didn’t know how smart it was to go into a bet blind with Spike but she also knew he valued his unlife so he wouldn’t ask for anything too outrageous if she lost.
Which she so didn’t plan on doing. Until now when left hand blue seemed an impossibility.
“Slayer, we don’t have all night.”
“Why? Are you busy doing nothing because you can’t even scare candy from a baby without a splitting headache?”
“Hey, now, no need to get nasty just ‘cause you’re losing.”
“I am not losing,” she ground out.
“I’ll tell you what, luv. I’ll let you get up and move under me to get to where you need to go under one condition.”
“Oh, this should be good,” Buffy mumbled.
“I want a massage.”
She laughed and said, “You want me to buy you a massage? Aren’t we the pampered vamp.”
“No, I want you to give me a massage.”
He heard her heart begin to race and he smiled.
“No! Absolutely not.”
“Then I guess you give up.”
It was the self-satisfaction in his voice that really pissed her off. She sighed angrily and used his back to push herself up.
“You’re going to have to lift your body up so I can fit under you.”
He turned to look at her, the smirk she knew would be there in place.
“Just do it,” she told him, the tone of her voice making sure that he stayed quiet. A look was one thing – she was getting used to those but words right now could be very bad and she wasn’t exactly sure who they would be bad for.
“Remember to watch those feet, luv. Don’t even think about moving them.”
She was convinced he was just about the biggest jerk she had ever come across but to be sure, she looked down, pleased that her left foot was on the yellow and right on the blue. She slowly moved under Spike and put her hand on the blue spot. She moved her right hand to try and hit the yellow spot it was supposed to be on. This was becoming a more rigorous workout then what Giles put her through. She wiggled to get more comfortable and to give her arms a little more space.
“Slayer?”
“I’m almost there. I have to cross my arms and I really think I’m going to be feeling this in the morning!”
She wiggled again and Spike bit his lip so hard he drew blood. He didn’t think she was aware of what she was doing but she would be soon enough if she kept rubbing up against him.
“Slayer – “
“Jesus, Spike, give me one second. I’m like a human pretzel right now!”
And more wiggling and he couldn’t bite his tongue anymore. “Buffy!”
She instantly stopped when he yelled her name. “What? What’s wrong?”
“Your ass.”
“I’m sorry?”
“Your ass is what’s wrong.”
“Um, I honestly have no idea how to respond to that,” she stated, genuinely confused.
He sighed. “You’ve taken to rubbing your ass into an area that responds quite well to –“
“Oh my god!” she yelped and fell down to the floor.
He chuckled to himself at her reaction. “I just can’t be having…” He trailed off and then added, “I thought I should tell you before you were…surprised.”
“I had no idea. I didn’t even think that – “
“Neither did I, to tell you the truth.”
“So, are you telling me you quit?” she asked, suddenly liking the shift in power.
“I never said any such thing!”
“But, Spike, are you sure you can handle it?” she asked, using her most faux innocent voice she could muster. “I wouldn’t want you to feel uncomfortable or anything.”
He huffed, kicking himself for even saying anything. He should have just let his hard-on poke her in the ass. That would have knocked her down good and proper.
“Don’t you worry about me. I’ll be fine.”
“Are you sure?” She turned her head to look at him, slowly rising her body and moving back to where she needed to be. “Just a minute ago, you were having a little problem with us like this.”
Spike had to admit that he was impressed with his self-control at the present. He never would have thought he had it in him. Not like this. Not with her now purposefully trying to get a rise out him, pun fully intended. If she wanted to play, he would play.
And he would win.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thanks to Ali for the beta :)