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Author's Chapter Notes:
What we've been up to: Throughout the summer we have been re-reading Book One of the Hellmouth Ascendant Trilogy to make sure that all the i's were dotted, the t's crossed and that any accidental inconsistencies we found were fixed. Luckily, we came up with nothing big, so the only new thing you'll find we did was to re-format the chapters to make them more uniform in style to give you a better reading experience.
NEW "Dusk" is now available in PDF format. Everyone who comments with their e-mail address shall be the proud owner of all 5,99 MB and 484 pages of the first book in the trilogy. You can choose between a regular book and an autographed copy (we will be needing your preferred name for that one). You better hurry, though, because this is a limited time offer: it starts today, and ends on November 15. You can also email your request to hm_ascendent3@yahoo.ca Other information The posting schedule will remain as it previously was - a chapter every other Saturday - which means that ch. 2 will be posted on November 15. Feedback and critique are the fuel that stokes the fires of creativity. If you've taken the time to read a story or chapter, please leave a comment to the author with your thoughts of it. Although constructive criticism is very appreciated, you don't have to write a long reply; a few words is enough to show you are there and reading. Enjoy! Deacon, the author Basilio, the community maintainer Rachelia, the archivist
"He, that can smile at death as we know him; who can flourish in the midst of diseases that kill off whole peoples. Oh! If such a one was to come from God, and not the Devil, what a force for good might he not be in this old world of ours!" – Abraham Van Helsing. (Bram Stoker’s Dracula.)



What do you call a nightmare that you can’t wake up from? A nightmare that consumes you, that drags you down and chokes you with its horror?

Alec Giles didn’t have the answer to these questions as he was confronted with this living nightmare before him, skewered on a dark metal blade that protruded from his arm. All he could think of, all he could really see were her eyes. Those gentle sea-foam green eyes that were now wide in shock and pain.

…And the blood. So much blood.

A sound then filled the room, screaming, and it was with surprise that Alec realized it was he who was screaming.

“Alec...?” Dawn’s words came weakly on red-tinged bubbles through her lips as she slumped forward, skewered like a piece of meat.

With his free hand, Alec cradled her cheek, tried to hold her upright, tried to do anything that would make this nightmare stop. He could feel wet tears of pain trickling down her face.

“Dawn, look at me, you’re going to be okay,” Alec whispered hoarsely. He lifted his head to cry out.

“We need help in here! Anyone! Please, help me!”

Dawn smiled feebly even as Alec felt her body going cold.

“Shhh, it’s okay…” she whispered. “It’s okay, Alec.”

“No, you’ll be fine. Willow or someone else will come and patch you up and you’ll be fine.”

Blinking back his own tears, Alec looked past Dawn’s shoulder frantically for a source of hope in the form of someone coming to his aid; there was none to be found.

“I need to tell you something,” Dawn whispered, beckoning Alec to lean closer to her face. “Please, it hurts so badly, Alec.”

Alec just nodded numbly as he leaned forward and Dawn reached up a trembling left hand.

It was in that moment that a small detail, almost imperceptible in its innocuousness, registered to Alec.

Dawn was right-handed.

Like a snake striking, the thing that was not Dawn lunged at his head. Its head split to become a fanged maw and it sank its teeth into Alec’s skull. He screamed even as the creature forced hands that were now tentacles down his throat, tearing at his esophagus and threatening to pull his tongue out at the seam. As the pain intensified, Alec beat at the creature with his free hand and vainly tried to kick at it. Every attempt to pull his head free of the creature’s mouth sent fresh waves of agony through his body, its teeth were hooked like a shark’s to prevent him from pulling out.

His vision went black and Alec felt his body start to go numb as the creature bit down even harder.

And so I die, he thought to himself.

There was a sudden agonizing jolt of pain, a blinding flash of light, and then he was free.

“Get away from him, you bitch!”

He heard a voice cry out from the darkness. He couldn’t see anything, but he managed a wry smile.

Buffy.

He felt strong, cold hands grab him and drag him across the floor.

“Kick the bitch’s teeth in, love!”

Spike.

Soon, the unmistakable sounds of an enraged Slayer filled Alec’s ears. There were shrieking noises, a loud crack!, and then a sound that could only be described as large portions of meat and bone being forcibly removed from a larger mass and hurled against the wall at full force.

Then there was silence.

Alec felt hands touching his body.

“Alec?! Alec can you hear me?”

He felt a warm, strong… and slightly gooey hand grip his. He smiled despite himself and squeezed his sister’s hand.

“My head hurts,” he tried to whisper, but the attack had dislocated his jaw, so he was forced to mumble his response.

He felt a flask being put to his lips and strong, smooth scotch being dribbled down his throat; it burned slightly, but it also helped numb the pain.

“Something for the pain, boyo,” Spike said quietly.

Alec wrestled with the visions of Dawn skewered at the end of his arm and drank greedily from the flask; the liquid sloshed over his lips and dribbled down his neck.

“Don’t worry, big brother, I’m here and I’m not going to leave you,” Buffy assured him.

Alec smiled again at that and even as he drifted off into unconsciousness, he could already hear the hurried approach of his friends and family.



There was darkness, thick and warm, and Alec floated effortlessly in it. For a time, there was peace and he was free of pain. Then the visions came…

The golobulan attack and its hellish aftermath, the attack of the Khulghaani and the faces of the gypsies who had been slaughtered, the foray into the Deadlands and Willow’s death and Buffy’s defilement at the hands of the Lazaraens, the wounds suffered from Willow’s spell. One by one, each event stacked upon him like chains and they twisted inside his mind, wrapping tighter around his heart and squeezing at his sanity until he couldn’t take the pain anymore and he screamed out even as he saw Dawn’s face locked in shock and her body skewered by his blades.

Alec regained consciousness with a jerk. His head ached and the skin on his face felt sticky from blood, with one eye bandaged over.

“Hey…” a familiar voice called out and Willow’s face came into view. “You’re awake.”

“Ow,” Alec replied gloomily, “I hurt.”

“That shouldn’t come as much of a surprise,” his father’s voice called out from Alec’s peripheral vision before settling down in sight next to Willow. “You’ve suffered multiple skull fractures, a serious concussion, and you’ve lost a lot of blood. If your regenerative powers had not been what they are, I’m not confident you would have ever woken up.”

“Comforting,” Alec said grimly.

Spike dropped beside the bed.

“You look like Hell, mate,” he informed his friend.

“My head is killing me. Give me that flask.”

Spike chuckled ruefully and handed over the requested object. His amusement turned to concern, though, as Alec upended the flask and drained it nosily and desperately. He sent a look to Buffy, who only shrugged.

Finished, Alec handed the flask back to Spike. “Thanks.”

“Anytime. Fortunately, we’re Englishmen: balls of British steel and skulls to match, lucky for you.”

Alec attempted to sit up and his bladed limb came up from the bed, nearly slicing a path across Spike’s face.

“Careful there!” the vampire cried out.

Alec sent his friend an apologetic look as he examined the blades and hooks on his arm. It was still caked in blood.

“What was it, Dad?” Alec asked quietly.

“A Synthak demon – shape-shifters and assassins, particularly nasty ones at that,” Giles said quietly.

Alec looked up with his good eye. “Why do I know that name?”

“Because Synthak demons are found only amongst one group – The Order of Taraka.”

“Oh… fantastic,” Buffy said forlornly. “I remember those guys, they suck.”

“If by ‘suck’ you mean ‘are ludicrously dangerous’, then, yeah, I’m with you on that,” Spike put in. He turned to face Alec. “Looks like someone’s put a hit out on you, mate.”

“Comforting. Any idea how I can get it lifted?”

“I found that killing all the assassins they sent after me worked pretty well,” Buffy said simply. “But I should ask Angel, he knows more about dealing with them than I do.”

“Thanks, sis, I appreciate it.” He gestured with his transformed arm. “What can you tell me about this, Dad?”

“Well, they’re magical in origin,” Giles commented as he peered at the gauntlet growing out of his son’s arm. Blades of every size and shape sprang in a haphazard, almost random fashion. Interlaced between the blades were purple streaks of light that shot back and forth along the blades. “This black metal is like none I’ve ever seen.”

He gingerly moved to trace one of the purple pathways. Alec reached over and grabbed him with his other hand.

“Bad idea, Dad,” he warned.

Getting to his feet, he walked over to one of the walls and, with a grunt, swung his bladed appendage into it. There was a crash as a hole no smaller than twice the width of his arm was made. Bits of concrete tumbled to the ground in fist-sized chunks. Alec looked down at his arm: the black metal blades weren’t even damaged, they just continued to glint in the light menacingly, crackles of purple energy coursing up and down it.

Giles swallowed as Xander’s eyes bulged.

“Whoa,” the carpenter whispered, surveying the damage.

“And how,” Willow replied, nodding.

Alec sighed and dropped back into the chair as Giles adjusted his glasses.

“Now, son, you said these blades manifested once before?” he asked cautiously.

Alec nodded. “During the Khulghaani attack,” he threw Willow a look, “when one of the vampires made it past our defenses in the altar room. I administered a pretty savage beating to it. These things just… popped out during the attack.”

“Were they exactly like this?” Giles asked.

Alec shook his head, gesturing with his free hand to the blades.

“No, they only started from here.” He pointed to a spot on the middle of his arm. “Now they’re all the way up to the elbow.” He traced the path of the blades with a finger. Sure enough, the last of the weapons terminated just below his elbow.

Giles frowned and asked, “Does it hurt?”

“No, not really. Feels like pins and needles, and my arm doesn’t feel any heavier. I can’t use my hand of course.”

He gestured to the four sharp knives, each almost a foot in length, placed above, below and on each side at the end of his arm, surrounded by a ring of grasping, mechanized barbed hooks that twisted and clicked menacingly.

Giles nodded. “I see,” he frowned. “How did you feel, Alec, the first time?”

“Scared,” Alec replied instantly. “Terrified, actually, I thought that Dawn and Willow were going to die.”

“And just now, when the blades reappeared?” Giles asked.

“I was having a nightmare about the Deadlands,” Alec replied.

The Watcher nodded once more.

“Well, it seems to react to stress, like a natural defense system.”

Faith pointed at the young man’s arm. “THAT is not a natural defense system, that is a sixteen-piece culinary set of kick-ass dimensions.” She grinned wryly. “He’s gone full-tilt Hellspawn.” She chuckled.

Giles turned to her, puzzled.

“ ‘Hellspawn’ ?” he asked.

Faith nodded.

“Yeah, see, there’s this comic book called Spawn and in it this guy has, like, hooks and chains that come out of his body, and a big red cape that can do, like, anything. And when he’s freaking out, all these wicked weapons come popping out of his skin.” She gestured to the blades coming out of Alec’s arm. “D, here, did a trick at City Hall – he fell out of a window and the boy’s threads became, like, a huge parachute. It reminded me of the comic.”

Xander turned to her.

“Really? ‘Cause, with all those purple little pathway thingies, I was thinking ‘Tron’,” he replied.

Giles shook his head.

“Pop culture aside, we need to figure out what exactly these are,” he gestured to the blades.

Alec frowned.

“Wait a minute,” he chimed in. “During the fight with the Khulghaani, after I killed the vampire, these things went away.” He gestured to the blades. “I’ve been awake for a while now and they’re still here.”

The younger Giles looked up at his father, who was regarding him thoughtfully.

“Alec, how do you feel, right now?” he asked carefully.

“Freaked,” he replied evenly after a moment of consideration.

Giles nodded.

“That would be it, then. I believe these blades are reacting to your fear. They believe that you are in danger and thus have not yet… uh…” he struggled for the most polite term and finished carefully, “…retracted.”

“Yeah, but Alec and Buffy have been doing the ‘seek and destroy’ bit for months and Alec’s never come back looking like The Shredder,” Xander chimed in.

Giles frowned and turned back to his son.

“Alec, has there ever been a time where you felt that your life was ever seriously in jeopardy?” he asked.

The part-demon shrugged as the glowing lines dimmed slightly.

“Sure. All the time. Vampire hunting isn’t exactly safe.”

Giles snapped his fingers.

“There it is! Alec, you’ve been fighting vampires with Buffy for months, but never once did you actually fear for your life anymore than the natural concern about fighting vampires.” He smiled slightly. “I suppose once you understand and accept the risks and are constantly exposed to them, they cease to become frightening. It becomes familiar.”

Alec nodded. “That would make sense,” he replied thoughtfully, bringing his bladed arm up to his chin automatically in a gesture of thought.

“Alec!” Willow yelled out in warning.

Alec focused and jerked back the bladed arm, which had been only an inch or so from his face, before sighing and setting it down, placing his other hand under his chin instead.

“Hey, D, what about when the blob came ripping through Buffy’s kitchen?” Faith asked. “Did you go all ‘Edward Scissorhands’ then?”

Alec shook his head.

“No, not at all.” He frowned, and then his eyes grew wide. “But my jacket did react, it burst into a shield when the thing spat at me.” He sent his father a sheepish look. “Or at least it tried to,” he amended.

Giles nodded.

“It would appear your powers are becoming more of a reflex than actual conscious thought as time goes on.” He frowned. “Has anything extraordinary happened to you in the last few hours that could explain this latest manifestation?” he questioned, gesturing to the blades.

“The Everstone!” Willow cried out. “When Alec lashed at the fire with his shadow whip, there was this weird purple light that shot out of the fire and zapped him.” She smiled slightly. “His hair was sticking up all the way back.”

Alec would have smirked if he weren’t still so completely wigged.

“What does this mean, Dad?” he asked worriedly.

Giles sighed and shook his head.

“I don’t know, son, I suppose I’ll have to-”

“Hey, what’s going on?” a sleepy voice called out.

They turned to see Dawn entering the room, rubbing sleep from her eyes.

She’s alive and whole. Thank God, Alec thought to himself.

Dawn noted Alec’s condition with a start of surprise before her face broke into a huge grin.

“Whoa! Cool! He’s doing it again!” She grinned wryly at him. “Are you going to go turn someone into chop suey?” she asked gleefully.

Alec couldn’t help but grin as he lifted the metallic arm up.

“Actually, I was just getting ready to make coleslaw,” he cracked, gesturing to the multitude of wicked looking blades jutting out from his arm.

There was a chuckle from the group as Alec and Dawn shared a grin… without any warning, the purple-lit pathways dimmed throughout the gauntlet and fell dark, there was a loud snap! and Alec’s arm convulsed violently as the blades folded into themselves and dived back under his skin. In seconds, he’d regained his right arm. The only sign that the blades had just been there were some residual crackles of purple energy. Everyone gaped.

“And the fear was gone,” Xander commented. “Never doubt the power of a bad one-liner,” he quipped.

Alec just nodded numbly as he ran his left hand over his arm. The flesh was cool and completely undamaged, not a single cut or laceration. Even the hairs on his arm were intact.

Giles took his glasses off.

“It would seem that way,” he acceded. “Whatever is residing in Alec seems to have strong reactions to fear and rage, and when those emotions are no longer present, it becomes dormant again.” He gestured at Alec’s arm. “And, apparently, it’s also very gracious with its gifts. That much sharp metal protruding from his arm, the bone, muscle tissue and flesh should be mangled beyond repair, but it’s clearly not.” He sighed and shook his head in puzzlement. “I don’t understand it.”

He turned to Anya, who was sitting next to Xander.

“Do Keeper demons usually come equipped with… weaponry?” he asked.

Anya snorted. “You try getting one of those genocidal aristocrats to agree to an interview.”

She waved a hand dismissively.

“As far as I know, though, the only thing Keeper demons have control over are the powers of night and darkness, they’re not for sprouting overgrown can openers from random points in their bodies,” she finished dryly.

Xander snorted. “And the prize for ‘Most delicately phrased piece of information’ goes to…” he imitated a drum-roll, “…Anya!” Let’s give her a big hand, everyone.”

Anya glared at him and harrumphed. Giles shook himself.

“Yes, well, be that as it may, I think we should continue to examine Alec until we can ascertain the cause for his… metamorphosis,” he finished dryly.

Alec got up and shook his right arm, which was still feeling like pins and needles.

“I’ll ask DeGanon if he has any magic that would help,” he replied quietly.

His stomach suddenly gurgled loudly. He blushed as everyone chuckled.

“And perhaps some food,” he added with a small smile.

Willow wrapped an arm around him. “You sure you’re okay?” she asked worriedly.

Alec smiled. “Yeah, but I think until I get this under control, it’s going to be separate beds for a while. I don’t want to accidentally turn you into shish kebab the next time I have a scary dream,” he tried to quip lightly, perhaps thinking of just how close something like that had come to happening.

Willow’s face fell.

“We need serious Obi-Wan action. To the Grigori Estate at once!” she decreed frantically.

Giles nodded as everyone else exchanged wry looks at the witch’s vehemence.

“I’ll call ahead to see if Marlena would be willing to bend the rules long enough for him to be examined by her. We need to drop off Buffy and Angel there as well, so it shouldn’t be a problem.

“What shouldn’t be a problem?” Spike asked, yawning, on coming into the room.

Giles turned to him, removing his glasses to peer at the blond.

“Is Buffy…?” the former librarian started.

Spike nodded. “Resting like a babe in her mother’s arms, yeah.”

He took in the crowd. “What’s going on?”

Giles replaced his glasses on his face.

“We’re currently discussing Buffy and Angel being brought to the Grigori Estate to recover from their wounds,” Giles sighed, expecting an argument from the possessive vampire.

Spike just nodded his head.

“It’s a good idea. The whole lot of them went through hell and back, down there. They could both use a little ‘R and R,” he commented thoughtfully.

“Behold Spike, the rational vampire,” Xander commented. “I wonder what’s happened to the real one?”

Spike casually dug out a cigarette ignoring Xander as Giles continued.

“Yes, well, Spike, you do realize that if Buffy and Angel do agree to this, that you’ll probably have to leave them behind?” Giles asked cautiously.

The vampire just nodded as he finished lighting his cigarette, snapping the lighter shut.

“Well,” he started, taking a drag off the cigarette and exhaling thoughtfully. “It seems to me, that Buffy and Peaches, over there, have put in their time. If a few days of kicking back and drinking Sangria in the shade will get them back into fighting trim, more power to them I say,” he commented thoughtfully.

“Okay, seriously now – who are you and what have you done with Spike?” Xander asked.

Spike snorted and took another drag of the cigarette. Giles shook himself out of the surprise he felt at how rational Spike was being.

“Besides, if Angel does anything untoward, I’ll drive a spike through his forehead, crack open his skull and eat his brain like sorbet,” Spike finished calmly.

Xander sighed in relief. “Now there’s the homicidal maniac we’ve all come to love and adore,” he quipped.

“Speak for yourself,” Dawn muttered quietly.

Giles cleared his throat.

“Well, then it’s settled.” He turned to Xander. “Take the others to the surface and get the camper ready, we’ll meet you there.”

Xander nodded and hopped off the table he’d been sitting on.

“Aye, Aye, Captain Giles,” he saluted jauntily and gestured. “All that’s coming for the surface and all points past, let’s go!”

The others filed out of the room, Willow stopped to give Alec a kiss on the cheek.

“I think you make a cute can opener,” she commented demurely.

Alec chuckled and patted her on the rump. “Thanks, lover. Go on, I’ll see you all in a bit.”

She smiled cheekily up at him and left. Faith slapped him on the shoulder.

“Think you can teach me that blade trick, D? It would mean I could retire my wooden stake.” She lashed out with a backhand in the air. “Whap! Decapitated vampire!” she grinned and Alec rolled his eyes.

“Scram!” he yelled.

She laughed and headed off. Dawn reached out to place a hand his arm.

“You sure you’re okay?” she asked, concern permeating her features.

Alec winked reassuringly. “As long as I don’t suffer from internal rusting, I’ll be good to go,” he commented wryly.

Dawn smiled and gave his hand a long squeeze before following the others out, leaving Alec, Spike and Giles in the room. Alec sighed and clapped his hands together.

“Okay, gents, let’s get cracking.” He gestured to the back room. “We’ve got an injured Slayer and a weakened vampire, both of whom are far too stubborn to accept any help.” He grinned at the two. “So, who gets to deal with Buffy?”

“He does!” Giles and Spike cried out in unison, gesturing to each other. Giles turned to Spike.

“You’re dating her!”

“Bollocks! You’re her bloody Watcher!” Spike retorted.

Alec sighed.

“Guys, I’m sure there’s a way we can work this out so you're both happy,” he said placating.

They slowly turned their heads to face him, Spike smiling wickedly.



“This really isn’t what I had in mind.”

Alec grumbled as he helped his injured sister carefully into the camper. The proud Slayer had put up surprisingly little resistance to the concept of being helped. ‘Lack of sleep’ had been her only explanation.

Spike snorted. “Yeah, well, your old man is helping the great poof into the camper and I need to check the sunproofing. That leaves you to deal with ‘Little Miss Sunshine’.”

Buffy looked up from the cot that she was resting in.

“Come on, guys, I’m not that bad.” She frowned at them then pouted. “Am I?” she asked meekly.

“Heh!”

Spike and Alec scoffed in unison as they finished getting her settled in. Xander closed the door behind them.

“Okay, kids, strap in and relax, ‘cause we are outta here!” he yelled back.

Amidst much celebratory cheers, the camper slowly pulled out of the park and lumbered onto the street. Spirits were high as radios were turned up loud, windows were rolled down and a general feeling of victory permeated the group as the camper sped down the highway.



Giles turned to his son. “What did DeGanon say about our departure?” he asked.

Alec shrugged.

“He said ‘Have a nice trip’ and ‘Thanks for saving my life’,” he replied smirking. “He also gave us these.”

He dug into his pockets, pulling out several twists of cloth. Giles frowned at them.

“What are they?” he asked, taking one of the colorful pieces of cloth in his hands.

“They’re called prikasa, they’re supposed to represent bad luck. We’re supposed to keep them until we lose them, sell them or someone offers to take them off our hands,” Xander spoke up.

He turned to regard them, keeping one eye on the road.

“That way, the kumpania manages to get rid of their bad luck,” he reached forward and took one of the twists of cloth, “and we get gypsy friendship bracelets,” he finished, tying one around his wrist with his teeth, keeping one hand on the wheel.

Alec looked at him wryly. “Terrific, cursed gypsy friendship bracelets.” He sighed dryly.

Tossing the others on the dashboard, he turned and headed back, gently easing past Anya, who was heading in the opposite direction to be with Xander up front. Spike was sitting with Buffy, talking. Faith was tending to Angel, who looked better, but still resembled ‘dead man walking’. Alec smirked at his pun and sat next to Willow, who was chatting with Dawn.

“Hey, you.” Willow smiled and kissed his cheek.

He smiled back and turned to the pair. “What are you girls up to?” he asked wryly.

“We’re plotting your untimely demise,” Dawn told him matter-of-factly.

Alec nodded. “Oh, okay then.”

He nodded his head sagely. Willow and Dawn burst into giggles.

“We’re playing ‘Truth or Dare’,” Willow confided to him.

“PG-13 version,” she added hastily, when Alec lowered his face to eye her wryly through his bangs.

Alec chuckled and nodded. “Okay, so what’s the topic?” he asked, bringing his hands together.

“We’re trying to figure out who’s the cutest guy on the trip,” Willow told him.

“Yeah, and you’re completely objective,” Alec put in sardonically.

Willow and Dawn both grinned, looking for all the world like two conspiring girlfriends ganging up on the guy.

“Well, trying to be,” Willow told him.

Alec smirked. “So, who’s in the running?” he asked.

Dawn raised a Minnie Mouse notepad and consulted it.

“Well, first there’s Xander, who has the sense of humor angle working for him,” Dawn read off.

Alec nodded, agreeing. “Sense of humor’s important.”

“Then there’s Giles, who has the accent going on and the ‘older man’ appeal,” Willow told him.

Alec scoffed. “Terrific, I’ll be sure to mention this to my father.”

Dawn and Willow gave him grave looks.

“Nothing said in the circle can be uttered to the outside world,” Willow warned him direly.

“Punishable by death,” Dawn added threateningly.

Alec pretended to be intimidated.

“Oh, of… of course, forgive me, please. Your secrets die with me,” he assured them hastily.

Smiling, knowing that they were being humored, the pair turned back to the list.

“Spike has got that whole ‘bad boy, Billy Idol’ look going for him,” Willow continued. “Both Dawn and I were raised on eighties MTV so that’s a big point in his favor. Also, he’s got the accent working for him, too.” Willow turned to Dawn, who nodded.

“You two have way too much free time on your hands,” Alec observed dryly.

They ignored him and went back to the list.

“Angel’s got a serious ‘Brooding James Dean’ vibe working for him, great taste in clothes,” Dawn commented. “Also, he carries an air of ‘doomed hero guy’ about him. Definitely a babe magnet,” she grinned.

“Ah, you like martyrs, huh?” Alec cracked.

Dawn favored him with a wry scowl.

“A tortured soul is the sign of an artist,” she replied haughtily. “And a good artist…”

“…Is an attentive lover,” Willow finished expertly.

Alec put a hand over his face, trying hard not to burst into laughter.

“There’s Dracula, too,” Willow chimed in. “Though I only saw him once, but he’s so ‘creature of the night’ mysterious.” She turned to Dawn and they both blushed furiously. “And he’s got that voice…” She shivered dramatically. “Goosebumps,” Willow finished, grinning.

“I sense the vampiric powers of mind control coming into play here,” Alec replied sarcastically.

“There’s DeGanon,” Dawn pointed out. “He’s a gypsy and Willow tells me he looks a lot like Dracula. Plus, he has the Romanian accent.” She grinned cheekily. “That’s irresistible.”

Alec sighed and cast a look at Buffy.

“Does Buffy know you have a thing for older men?” he asked wryly.

Since he was watching the blonde Slayer, he completely missed the flash of vulnerability that washed over Dawn’s face.

“She’s… got an idea,” she whispered back.

Alec turned back to the pair.

“Okay, have we covered everybody?” Alec asked, smirking.

The girls shook their heads.

“Not even!” Willow exclaimed, indignant. “We haven’t covered your assets, yet,” she smiled demurely.

Alec rolled his eyes at her choice of words.

“Terrific, I’m on display.” He sighed, pretending he wasn’t enjoying every minute of this.

“Okay,” he got to his feet and spread his arms out flamboyantly. “See anything you like?” he asked, once again facing them. The girls grinned naughtily.

“Could you… um… turn around? Slowly, please,” Willow asked, batting her eyes innocently.

Alec sighed mock exasperatedly and obliged. And, with horror, he suddenly remembered that he had changed out of his normal black jeans into a pair of extraordinarily tight brown leather breeches that DeGanon had given him. He groaned inwardly, they were going to have a field day with this. The two tried their best to remain serious as they studied him.

“Nice pants,” Dawn commented dryly.

Alec closed his eyes as he could almost see the two girls turning to each other, tittering madly.

“Okay, you can turn around now,” Willow bade him.

Alec opened his eyes and slowly turned around. Sure enough, the two girls were biting down on their lower lips in hormonal glee. They began to pick him apart.

“Great taste in clothes,” Dawn commented. “Leather works for him nicely.”

Alec’s eyes nearly bulged out of his head. Where had the shy young girl with whom he’d watched Monty Python gone? He turned an accusatory glance at Willow.

“Is this your handiwork, love?” he asked.

Willow shook her head. “Nope.”

She grinned and blew the white lock of hair out of her face. “She seems to be coming into her own here.”

Alec snorted. “Terrific,” he muttered sardonically.

“Quiet!” Dawn barked out, “we’re studying.”

Alec snorted again, but fell silent.

“He’s got the double name thing working for him,” Willow noted.

Dawn sighed. “Yeah, but so does Spike, so that doesn’t work,” the young woman replied forlornly.

“Yes, but remember, Angel has the good taste in clothes, too, so we can't exclude things taken by other people or else this will be a very short list,” Willow explained.

“Good,” Alec replied dryly.

They scowled at him then went back to their analysis.

“Okay, good wardrobe and the cool double name, what else?” Dawn asked.

Willow pursed her lips, deep in thought.

“Well, there’s the accent, very Pierce Brosnan,” the witch commented.

Dawn nodded, then added, “Nice eyes.”

Willow nodded and gestured for Alec to lean closer to them. He sighed and did so.

“Black with green and purple in them, very nice,” Willow commented.

“One might even say penetrating,” Dawn replied.

The redhead smiled slightly. “There is that.” She smirked.

Alec sighed and straightened.

“Ladies, much as I love being likened to a prized breeding animal, can we please wrap this up?”

Dawn sighed. “I suppose,” she breathed wistfully.

She and Willow composed their thoughts.

“He’s got the tall, dark look, but without the angst vibe. That makes him accessible, which is a point in his favor,” Willow commented.

“He can fight, too. Very Brandon Lee in the ‘The Crow’,” Dawn put in.

“When did your mother let you watch that movie?” he asked, frowning.

Dawn grinned. “Who said she ‘let’ me?” she replied demurely.

He shifted his glance to Willow, gesturing to the girl.

“And you’re telling me this ISN’T your influence?” he demanded.

Willow shook her head. “Nope, not me,” she replied, grinning prettily.

Alec gave her a skeptical look, before the two girls turned back to the list.

“Okay, then. We’ve got the accent, bravery, being an older man…” Willow looked up. “I think we have our winner.”

Alec smirked. “What an honor,” he replied wryly.

The girls shook their heads.

“Nope,” Dawn grinned.

“Sorry, Alec, your dad beat you,” Willow informed him, shrugging. “He was in a band,” she offered as explanation.

For a moment, Alec looked back and forth between the two, gaping.

“You’re dead,” he whispered.

Both the girls started to giggle, moving away from him.

“Oh, no, you don’t, mister,” Willow forbade him as she and Dawn moved closer together.

“Oh, yes, I do!” he roared and charged them.

They squealed and threw up their hands as Alec pounced on them, tickling them both savagely. Before long, the three of them were in a heap on the floor, howling with glee. Alec looked up to see his father staring down at the three of them, vaguely admonishing. Willow was on the bottom, Alec on top of her and Dawn on top of them both.

“Alec, what are you doing?” he asked mildly.

The young man grinned up at his father. “Truth or dare, Dad,” he replied grinning.

Willow craned her head up. “PG-13 version,” she added, grinning.

“Ah,” Giles said as if that totally explained the three of them in a tangle of arms and legs on the floor.

Shaking his head, bewildered, he headed off to go check on Buffy. Willow looked up past Alec’s shoulder at Dawn, who was lying face down on his back.

“Dawn?”

Dawn peered over Alec’s shoulder to look at the witch.

“Yeah, Willow?”

“GET HIM!”

With that growl, Willow began attacking Alec from the bottom, Dawn from the top. Alec realized with horror that he was sandwiched between two very mischievous women.

“Spike!” he cried out to the blond vampire. “Help!”

Spike turned and snorted at the spectacle, taking in the flailing man and the two women assaulting him.

“Amateur,” he replied grinning. “Back in the heyday, two women were considered breakfast for me,” he chuckled, “and they’ve got you begging for mercy.”

He leveled a warning finger to the other man, who was trying desperately to scramble away, or at least doing his best to look like he was desperately trying to scramble away.

“Better not let them get you behind closed doors, mate. They’ll eat you for lunch.”

That gave Willow a fabulous idea and, with a mock vampire snarl, she began biting Alec, Dawn followed suit.

“Ow! Hey, no biting! Ow! Quit it!” Alec glared at the bleached menace. “Thank you ever so much, Spike,” he growled.

Spike waved it away. “Oh, no worries, mate,” he replied, grinning, before turning his attention back to the Slayer on the cot.

Alec continued to howl in despair for quite some afterwards.



A few hours had gone by. Giles had taken over for Xander, the latter claiming that driving the camper was like driving ‘a really big Pinto’. Giles was still skeptical, but he seemed to be handling himself well. Angel was up front with him to give pointers. The others were gathered in a large circle, continuing with Willow and Dawn’s truth or dare game.

“Okay, a little off the subject, but I have to ask,” Xander put forth. “Xena and her sidekick: were they or weren’t they?” he grinned.

“No!” all the women cried out.

“Yes,” all the men stated simply, earning them all disgusted looks from the women.

“That is so male,” Buffy stated. “Two women can’t have a deep, loving relationship, without being-”

“Buffy, they were naked together in a medieval hot tub,” Xander interrupted.

Buffy’s face fell mid-lecture.

“Oh,” she whispered meekly, before grumbling and settling back against Spike, who was grinning madly.

“Okay, I have to ask the guys this,” Faith chimed in. “What is it with you guys and watching two girls kiss?”

“Yeah!” all the girls exclaimed.

The guys sent each other long suffering looks. How best to explain this?

“Its simple, love,” Spike answered. “All women are insane. The fact that a man and a woman can get together long enough to suck face is amazing. The sight of two double X chromosome lunatics managing it is a spectacle to be regarded with the same amount of awe and reverence as Halley’s Comet, or you know, a Sex Pistols reunion tour,” he finished grinning.

The men roared with laughter, the women began muttering angrily.

“Uh-oh,” Xander commented noticing the unrest.

“Duck!” Alec cried as a barrage of pillows came hurtling towards all the men in the group. They threw their arms up to protect themselves from the onslaught of projectiles.

“Okay, okay, we give!” Xander cried out.

The attack ceased as the women looked at each other, supremely satisfied. Dawn put forth the next question.

“Okay, I have one – what signifies most the difference between a girl and a woman?” she asked, trying hard not to stare at Alec.

“Knockers!” Spike cried out, earning a hard slug from Buffy.

“Shut up, honey,” she retorted.

Spike rubbed his shoulder and grinned wryly.

“What, you want to tell me that the sudden onslaught of funny feelings towards the opposite sex didn’t coincide roughly with the purchase of your first ‘over the shoulder boulder-holder’?” he asked.

Alec nearly died with laughter, flat on his back howling with glee, hands over his eyes. Xander wasn’t faring much better as the woman regarded Spike with outrage.

“SPIKE!” Buffy cried swatting him with the pillow over and over.

He laughed as he parried the blows. “Well, am I right or aren’t I?” he demanded.

Buffy just glared at him before turning back to the group.

“Anyone who has a PULSE,” she shot a glare at Spike, who just winked and chortled, “want to answer Dawn’s question?”

Alec sat up and raised his hand, earning bemused smirks from the girls.

“My brother will now attempt to tell us what it means to be a woman,” Buffy cracked.

Faith laughed. “Way to get in touch with your feminine side, D.”

“I’d like to hear what he has to say,” Dawn put in.

Everyone quieted down thought there was still some snickering. Alec cleared his throat.

“Well, I just think, that as far as women go, their emotional growth can be summed up in one sentence.” He held up a finger.

“ ‘I feel pretty! Oh so pretty! I feel pretty, oh so pretty I feel GAY!” Spike screeched at the top of his lungs, sounding like a cat being put in a blender.

“SHUT UP, SPIKE!” everyone yelled.

The blond vampire sniggered and settled back against the wall, smirking.

“Thank you for that, Spike, I needed to be reminded what true suffering was.” Alec grinned and stuck a finger in his ear, wiggling it around to clear it of Spike’s awful melody before continuing.

“No, I think that the difference between a girl and a woman can be measured by how she loves someone and more importantly, what she’s willing to give up to realize that love.”

There was a stunned silence as the women and men regarded each other in awe at the fairly profound insight.

“Clarify,” Buffy implored.

Alec thought.

“Well, as far as kids go, I mean, they get crushes. And it’s great, you know? This person is their whole world. But it’s unattainable so there’s no fear of sacrifice, I mean, what’s the point of giving something up to be with a person you can never fully have?” he asked.

Buffy nodded and gestured for him to continue. Alec took a deep breath.

“But a woman, I mean, she falls in love with a guy… or a girl,” he shot Spike a wry look, who smirked and gestured for him to carry on, “and she’s willing to do what it takes to make that love a reality. Give up what has to be given up and willing to put blood, sweat and tears into it. Because she’s old enough to realize that he IS attainable and that with enough effort, maybe she can make it happen,” he finished.

Faith frowned. “Okay, so question: what makes a guy attainable?” she asked.

“Yeah, is it like whether or not he has a girlfriend?” Anya chimed in.

“Or maybe he’s older?” Dawn added, trying very hard to sound casual.

Alec shook his head.

“It isn’t any of those things. I mean, a guy may be older or younger than the girl, or he may have a girlfriend and that can certainly be a hurdle. But the biggest thing is one simple question – is he willing to be receptive to her love?” Alec opened his hands. “If he is, then he’s attainable, if not, forget it.”

“So, how does a girl know if a guy’s receptive to her warm fuzzy feelings?” Willow asked, leaning back her head to gaze at her lover wryly; she had found a comfortable spot, leaning against Alec’s upraised knees.

Alec pondered.

“I guess you just have to ask whether or not what he says, and more importantly what he does, shows he has enough care and consideration to be open to her loving him,” he replied uncertainly.

“Okay, and now for the sixty-four thousand dollar question…” Buffy began.

“…What action does a guy do that says love?” Faith finished.

“Trust,” Alec replied unhesitatingly. “If what he does and says inspires trust in you. Like he could tell you anything and it’d be cool, and vice-versa, then you know there’s someone who’s receptive to being loved and thus attainable.” He waved a hand. “I’m not talking about someone who has things to hide, we all do. Cryptic people can still be trusted.”

Buffy shot a look up at Angel, and frowned slightly when she noticed Faith doing the same.

“But if underneath all the elusiveness, there’s a sense that this person really IS looking out for you, really does want nothing but the best for you, you know? Puts your needs before his own, no matter in how subtle a fashion he does it in, then there’s a shot.”

He exhaled hard and shook his head, clearing it, he turned to Dawn.

“That answer your question, petite?” he asked wryly.

Dawn had a shocked look on her face. A look that quickly melted into an expression of sheer rapture.

“Totally,” she beamed at him with sheer joy.

“Bravo!” Buffy clapped.

Everyone joined in applauding the other man’s insight, except Spike, who snorted.

“You’re not going to start taking an interest in interior decorating and memorizing the casts of Broadway musicals now, are you?” he asked derisively.

“Sod off,” Alec retorted.

Spike chuckled and shook his head.

“Okay, next question. Who’re better in bed, the living or the dead?” Faith asked.

Every head in the group turned to face Buffy, who blushed deep red.

“Ummm…” she looked down.

“Go on, love, who makes a better bedmate? Ol’ Captain America or the Big Bad himself?” Spike grinned, jerking a thumb towards his chest.

Buffy bit her lip and looked back and forth.

“Giles!” Buffy cried. “Isn’t it time for more herbal medicine?” she asked shrilly.

Everyone laughed as Spike sputtered.

“Love?” he wailed forlornly.

Buffy just patted his hand. Alec smirked at the outraged vampire’s wounded pride.

“Okay, okay. Let’s cut the wounded protector of truth and justice a break before her boyfriend decides to hitchhike home.” He chuckled. “Next question?”

There was a round of laughter from everyone as Spike struggled to salvage his dignity. The conversation quickly dissolved into a series of ‘Q and A’ of personal intimacy.

Spike was draining a bottle of beer. When he finished, Xander gestured to the empty bottle.

“Hang on a second, ‘Big Bad’.”

He grinned and took the bottle away from the glaring vampire. He held it up.

“Who remembers THIS game?” the often goofy young man grinned, waggling the bottle.

“I do, but I gotta tell you, there are too many people here and I’m WAY too sober to participate,” Faith spoke up.

Everyone slowly turned to look at her with expressions ranging from wry amusement to mute horror. Faith just grinned.

“Or where you talking about another recreational party game?” she asked coyly.

Xander was still mulling over Faith’s implications, Anya swatted him hard on the arm.

“Huh? What? Oh.” He shook his head. “No, I’m talking about ‘Spin the Bottle’,” he hastily explained.

Faith grinned widely.

“My game involves a bottle,” she replied evenly.

“FAITH!” everyone yelled.

“What? I’ve explained a good night slaying’s effect on me!” she grinned.

“Yes, and may it never be repeated,” Buffy chimed in.

Faith laughed as Xander put the bottle down in the center of the circle.

“Okay, so who goes first?” he asked.

“You do!” everyone chimed in.

Xander flinched, but sighed and spun the bottle; it landed on Willow. He smiled sheepishly at Alec.

“You gonna kick my ass, buddy?” he asked.

Alec smirked. “Assume ‘yes’ and take your chances,” he replied.

Willow leaned back to glare playfully at him.

“Be nice, Alec Giles. Xander’s my bestest childhood buddy.”

“He’s your ONLY childhood buddy,” Alec retorted wryly.

Willow sighed mock exasperatedly and leaned over, giving Xander a quick peck on the lips. Xander slowly put his hands up away from Willow, moving away from her slowly, never taking his eyes from Alec who was debating whether or not he should conjure up some shadow stuff just to freak him out.

“You may live to see another day,” Alec assured Xander.

He sighed in relief and turned to Spike. “You’re next, man.”

Spike rolled his eyes, muttering. “This is so bloody juvenile.”

He gave the bottle a spin and groaned in dismay when it landed on Alec.

“There’s no bloody way I’m kissing a bloke!” Spike growled angrily.

Alec arched an inquiring eyebrow. “Gee, honey, was it something I said?” he asked wryly.

Spike snarled at him. Alec laughed and stuck out his hand.

“Consider it a failed date, ending in a firm handshake,” he grinned.

Spike snorted and gave his hand a shake.

“Kissing a bloke, I don’t bleedin’ think so!” he muttered under his breath.

Alec grinned and turned to the group.

“What do you want to bet he’s never going to even call?” he asked, folding his hands over his heart, sniffling pitifully. Everyone laughed as Spike just muttered angrily under his breath.

“Whose turn is it now?” Xander asked.

“Mine.” Buffy leaned down over the edge of the cot and gave the bottle a spin, and snorted wryly when it landed on Spike.

“Pucker up, lover!” He grinned and kissed the Slayer full on the mouth, easing her back down onto the cot amidst much appreciative applause and hooting. They parted and grinned at the group.

“Now that’s more like it!” Spike roared happily.

“What happened to the game being ‘bloody juvenile?' ” Xander asked.

Spike snorted.

“Yeah, well, if I get a beautiful woman’s tongue in my mouth, it ceases to be ‘bloody juvenile’ and becomes ‘bloody brilliant’!” he replied, grinning.

There was a round of laughter at Spike’s outrageous statement.

“Next?” Buffy asked.

Faith walked up. “My turn.”

She grinned and gave the bottle a good hard spin, and grinned wickedly when it landed on Buffy. The latter’s eyes widened in alarm.

“Now, hold on there, Faith,” she warned.

Faith just grinned as Spike, who looked like he was about to die another time through laughing, moved out of her way to grant her a clear line of fire at the blond Slayer.

“Yeah, B?” Faith asked slowly stalking over.

Buffy jutted out her hand. “A firm handshake for a failed date,” she said finally.

Faith grinned and moved to take the hand, before suddenly dipping her head and gathering the surprised Slayer’s mouth in a long kiss. There was a stunned silence, followed by a roar of approval by the men.

“Good show!” Spike cried out.

“Oh, my… God!” Alec howled with laughter, his eyes wide as dinner plates.

Xander was nearly in fits as he took in the kissing Slayers, slack-jawed. Finally, Faith released the struggling Buffy.

“My dates don’t fail, B.”

She winked at the other woman, who was sputtering madly, then turned and gathered hard high-fives from all the guys.

“Was anyone else aroused by that?” Xander asked.

“Yo!” Alec and Spike called out in unison, raising their hands enthusiastically.

Buffy swatted Spike and Willow socked Alec on the arm.

“That wasn’t funny!” Buffy cried, trying not to laugh.

“Yes, it was,” Alec replied, rubbing his arm.

Buffy turned around and grinned reluctantly. “Yes, it was,” she admitted.

Giving Faith an appreciative look, she asked. “Teach me that trick sometime, huh, Faith?”

Her sister Slayer grinned. “Your bedroom or mine, B?” she asked demurely.

“Mine!” Spike chimed in earning laughter from the group. “And only if I can get a hold of a good quality camcorder,” he added.

Xander held his hands out before him.

“ ‘Vampire Slayer Vixens Unchained’,” he envisioned. “It’d be pay-per-view material,” he declared.

Everyone else laughed.

“I’d order it,” Alec commented wryly.

Another round of laughter echoed in the trailer as Willow rolled her eyes.

“Well, THAT was interesting,” Alec chuckled, shaking his head in amusement as he reached for the bottle, to take his turn.

Dawn held her breath, hoping against hope. Alec gave the bottle a spin and it landed…

…on Anya. Dawn bit her lip to keep from wailing in disappointment. Alec smirked wryly.

“One good turn deserves another, huh, Xander?” he grinned at the younger man, who looked pretty uncomfortable.

“Just make it quick,” he growled.

Anya didn’t look too pleased either. Alec cordially took her hand and kissed it before grinning at the both of them.

“Was that acceptable?” he asked wryly.

Xander nodded and Alec settled back against his feet as Willow took the bottle and gave it a spin, it spun a few turns and landed on Spike. The vampire grinned.

“This is just my night,” he replied chortling.

Alec shot him a warning look as Spike walked over and planted a kiss on the witch’s cheek.

“There we go, love, proper as could be.” He winked as Willow sighed in relief.

She got on her hands and knees to hand Anya the bottle and Spike lashed out and gave her upraised rump a resounding smack!. Willow gasped in surprise and nearly fell on top of Anya as everyone laughed. Spike straightened and bowed.

“Thank you, thank you, no applause, please.” He held up his hands in mock humility.

Alec chuckled as he gathered the furiously blushing Willow in his arms. She sputtered, red-faced, and pointed at Spike.

“He slapped my butt!” she cried out accusingly.

Spike grinned and nodded. Willow growled at him and raised her hands to cast a spell.

“I’ll show him,” she muttered.

Spike looked alarmed as Alec gently placed a restraining hand on her arms.

“Now, now, love, let the vampire have his laugh.” He grinned and kissed her face, gently patting her stinging backside appreciatively. “He could not have found a finer derriere to smack,” he assured her.

Willow grinned, made a happy sound and snuggled closer to Alec. Dawn rolled her eyes and made the gesture of gagging with her finger. Alec smirked at the display as Anya spun the bottle, it fortunately landing on Xander.

“Good,” she muttered as she leaned in to kiss her boyfriend, “because I don’t want to kiss any of you other people, I only want to kiss Xander.”

Xander chuckled and silenced her with a kiss.

“And for that, we are grateful,” Alec commented wryly as the group broke into a round of applause.

Finally Dawn was the only one left.

“Okay, I guess that leaves you, little lady,” Xander told her.

Buffy frowned and was about to protest before she remembered how old she had been when she’d played her first game of ‘Spin the Bottle’. Dawn tentatively reached forward, her eyes squeezed shut in prayer.

Please God, let it be him, oh please oh please oh please, she pleaded within her head. Giving the bottle a hard spin she watched it spin with enormous intensity. The bottle spun, then slowed, then stopped. She looked up her eyes wide.

“Well, petite,” Alec chuckled. “Guess that leaves you and me,” he observed wryly.

YEEEEEEESSSSSS!!!!!!!! Dawn nearly cried out in joy.

Buffy, noticing the look on her face, smiled but didn’t mention it.

“First kiss, D?” Faith asked.

Dawn nodded as she slowly leaned towards Alec.

Faith grinned. “Hell of a pick,” she replied, chuckling at the younger girl’s good fortune.

Alec cast Buffy a look.

“You’re not going to kick my ass, are you?” he asked worriedly.

Dawn whipped her head around; a tiny sound of what almost sounded like barely-restrained pleading escaping her lips as she implored her sister with soulful eyes. Buffy pretended to consider the question as Dawn looked ready to explode.

“Nah, not this time, Alec,” she smiled as her sister’s taut face collapsed with relief.

Alec chuckled and turned to Willow.

“Don’t look at me, mister, do your duty!” Willow replied to his unspoken question, gesturing to Dawn.

He smiled and leaned towards Dawn, who was reaching out to his face with a shaking hand. Gently, he took her hand in his and reached up to brush a strand of hair out of her face and stroked her cheek with his thumb. Dawn closed her eyes expectantly as she tilted her head to meet his mouth with hers. Their mouths were two inches apart, then one. She could feel his breath against her lips; she held her breath, her heart pounding…

…And with a screech of brakes, the camper skidded to a stop, sending Dawn tumbling into Alec, who caught her as everyone fell to one side.

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Dawn raged quietly, tears of frustration leaking out of her eyes.

Alec didn’t notice as he cast a look to the front of the camper.

“Nice parking job, Dad,” he commented dryly.

Giles stepped to the back of the camper as everyone climbed back into their seats, except Dawn, who was still clinging to Alec’s shirt, white-knuckled.

“I’m terribly sorry, everybody,” Giles apologized. “For some reason, I didn’t see the entrance to the Estate until we were right on top of it.”

Dawn glared at him with eyes filled to the brim with murderous intent. Alec chuckled and got to his feet, helping the disappointed young woman to hers. He stroked her face and winked.

“Rain check, huh, petite?” he grinned at her.

Dawn just nodded. Leaning forward he kissed her hair and followed his father off the camper, trying to ignore a powerful feeling that he had missed something important. Buffy walked over to Dawn.

“It could have been worse,” she commented. “Remind me to tell you about my first kiss with Angel.”

She wrapped a comforting arm around her sister and led her off the camper.





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