She ran after him with all the speed that she possessed, finally catching up to him and grabbing his arm, forcing him to look at her.
"Spike, can't we talk about this?"
He ripped his arm out of her grasp. "There is nothing to talk about, Slayer. I'm sick of you and this whole bloody town."
Buffy couldn't believe that he was acting like this after everything they shared. "I don't get what your problem is. I thought things were getting better with us. Isn't this what you wanted?"
Spike gave a harsh laugh. "You think I wanted you? You're nothing to me. You're the Slayer and I'm a vampire, that's all there is to it. I'm tired of your games, pretending that you actually give a damn about me when we both know that you don't. You tell me that you have feelings for me and you expect me to believe that? I'm not stupid, Buffy. I know you could never love me and you know what? I really don't care because I don't love you. I never did. When I told you I did, it was a lie. I could never love you."
Buffy was shocked at his statement and felt tears in her eyes, but she tried to fight them back. "Why are you saying this? I thought you cared about me."
Spike brushed some hair out of her face and moved toward her ear. "Newsflash, baby. It was only about sex. How could anyone want anything else from you?" he whispered.
Buffy pushed him away from her, not being able to stop the tears from falling now. She wiped at her eyes angrily, sending him a look that could kill. "You bastard!" she spat.
Spike only smiled at her. "Not your best, Slayer. Don't start the waterworks now, that's just really pathetic."
"I can't believe I actually started to feel something for you. I started to think that you were more than a monster and that you were actually someone worth my time, but I guess I was wrong. I don't want anything to do with you. If you're so sick of me and this town, then maybe you should just leave. And this time, don't come back," she told him, venom in her voice.
"For once, you make sense. That's exactly what I was planning on doing."
Buffy stepped away from him, tears still flowing down her face. "Good, and while you're at it, you can go to Hell." She then ran in the other direction, far away from him.
Spike's smile faded once she was gone. He couldn't believe everything he just said to her. None of it was the truth, but he felt that it was the right thing to do. She would be better off without him. She had no idea that he did it to save her life, or so he hoped. Spike suddenly felt another presence behind him, realizing who it was. "You can come out, I know you're there."
A figure then stepped out of the shadows, giving him a twisted grin. "Right, I forgot about those vampire senses."
Spike turned to the familiar man once he made his presence known. "We had a deal, Gavin. I did what you wanted and you promised to stay away from her."
Gavin walked closer to him. "Yes, I have no reason to kill your precious Slayer now. It looks like you already did that for me."
"What are you talking about?" Spike wondered.
"You actually thought that the Slayer would be safer after you rejected her with your lies? She may be safer from me, but her heart is now broken and that will easily get her killed. I guess you didn't think about that, did you? Well, it was fun while it lasted, William. We'll meet again," he said, soon vanishing into thin air.
Spike stood there and thought about what he said. He instantly got a bad feeling that Buffy was in trouble. If something happened to her, he would never forgive himself. With that thought in mind, he took off to try and find her.
* * * * *
Buffy got to the dorm and thought that she cried all of her tears out, until she walked into her room and saw Willow. The tears then started to fall again and she fell to the floor, holding her head in her hands while the sobs took over her body.
Willow went to her friend's side and helped her up, pulling her over to the bed. "Buffy, what happened?"
She looked up at Willow through her tears, trying to calm down as she told her friend everything. "I don't know what happened, Will. Things were going fine with us and I thought that he actually loved me. He told me that he did and he was so caring and sweet, but now I don't know who he is anymore. I guess it's true, I really do turn men into monsters when I sleep with them."
Willow didn't know what to do to make her feel better. She sounded so defeated. "That's not true, Buffy. Maybe there's a good explanation for his behavior. I know he really cares about you."
She gave a humorless laugh. "Yeah, he has a good way of showing it." Buffy then became more serious as she gazed at Willow. "Is it me? Is there something wrong with me?"
Willow shook her head. "No, there's nothing wrong with you. He was just being an idiot."
Buffy looked away. "I think I'm the idiot. I just don't get why this keeps happening. Why do guys keep leaving me? There has to be something wrong with me."
Willow didn't know what to tell her.
Buffy wiped her tears away. "I have to get out of here." She stood up and walked to the door.
"Where are you going?"
Buffy turned to her friend one last time. "I don't know, maybe I'll patrol or something. Killing things might make me feel better. I just can't sit around feeling sorry for myself. I have to do something."
Willow nodded in understanding.
"I'll be back soon," Buffy said before she left the room, heading to the nearest cemetery.
* * * * *
Buffy was walking for what seemed like hours and she couldn't find anything to kill, so she just left the cemetery and walked around until she felt like going back to the dorm. It was late and the streets were pretty empty, that was until Buffy heard a sound coming from the alley behind the Bronze. She went to check it out and wasn’t prepared for what she saw.
An angry man was holding a knife at a young girl that was clearly terrified. "I told you to give me your money!" he yelled in her face.
The girl was frozen in fear.
Buffy moved quietly behind the guy, being as stealthy as she could. When she was close enough, she brought her leg up and kicked the knife out of his hand.
He yelled in pain as he fell to the ground, grabbing his now injured hand.
Buffy then turned her attention to the girl. "This would be a good time for you to run away."
She didn’t have to be told twice and ran out of the alley, never looking back.
Buffy saw that the man was getting up. It sucked that he had to be human. She couldn't kill him, but beating him to a bloody pulp would be just fine. She crossed her arms over her chest. "I've never dealt with muggers before, so I hope I'm not rusty."
He scowled at her with pure malice. "You'll pay for that, you little bitch!"
Buffy rolled her eyes as he tried to take her on. She fought back, not putting all of her strength into the fight. He was just a man, after all. She was surprised at how strong he was, but he could never be stronger than her.
* * * * *
Spike searched everywhere for Buffy and wasn’t having any luck. He just missed her at the dorm and decided to try the Bronze. He then heard a commotion coming from the alley and ran to check it out.
* * * * *
Buffy was fighting off the guy as best she could, throwing kicks and punches every chance she got. It was a lot harder than she thought. For some reason, she couldn’t get her mind into the fight.
He suddenly had enough and reached into his pocket.
She was too distracted to notice that he pulled a gun out, until it was sticking her in the abdomen. Buffy wasn't expecting a gun and didn't have much time to think about it.
The man gave her a crooked smirk. "Say goodnight, bitch." He then pulled the trigger.
* * * * *
Spike stopped when he heard the gunshot, then ran even faster. When he finally got to his destination, he saw Buffy with another man. A man that was holding a gun. Spike ran toward them and punched the man hard in the face, which knocked him to the ground. He ignored the pain that shot through his skull and went over to Buffy.
"Are you all right, love?" He was worried about the expression on her face and saw her hands clutching her stomach; it was then that he noticed the blood oozing out of a pretty fatal gunshot wound.
Buffy tore her hands away, staring at the blood that coated her fingers. She collapsed and landed right in Spike's arms.
Spike felt for her pulse to find that it was very weak. "Come on, Buffy. Stay with me, pet."
Buffy's eyes opened to glance at him. "Spike, you're here," she whispered.
He granted her with a small smile. "Of course I am, sweetheart."
"I thought you hated me."
Spike felt tears in his eyes at her response. "I could never hate you, Buffy. God, I'm sorry for everything I said. I didn't mean it; I thought I was doing the right thing. I realize now that I wasn't. I'm so sorry."
Buffy touched his face, then brought her hand back to her stomach. "I'm dying, aren't I?" she wondered in a shaky voice.
Spike shook his head. "No, I won't let you die. I can get you to the hospital; you just have to hold on."
Buffy shook her head this time, which took a lot of energy. "It's too late, Spike. I can feel it."
Spike grabbed her hand. "Don't talk like that, love. It'll be okay, I won't let you die. It's not your time."
Buffy had tears coming down her face. "I love you," she whispered to him.
Spike knew that she was saying goodbye. He leaned in and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips. "I love you, too. You can't leave me, pet. I need you."
Buffy caressed his cheek again. "I'll never leave you." She could feel the life slipping out of her. Buffy brought her hand back down, realizing what was really happening to her. A hard sob broke out of her throat as the tears started to blur her vision. "I'm scared, Spike. I don't want to die."
Spike held her to his chest, kissing the top of her head. "God, I love you so much. Please don't leave me, baby. I’m nothing without you." He felt her head drop and looked down to see that her eyes were now open and lifeless. He knew that he lost her. Spike continued to hold her to him, rocking her back and forth. He grew angry and gazed up at the dark sky. "Why her? Why did you have to take her? She was so young, it's not fair!" He dropped his head and continued to let the tears out for the loss of his love.
After what felt like forever, he gently placed Buffy on the ground and stood up. He looked around and noticed the man that was still unconscious. He felt like ripping his damn head off for taking her away from him, but for some reason, he couldn't do that and it wasn't the chip. He would have welcomed the pain. Spike knew that Buffy wouldn’t want that. He would let the police deal with him. Spike took his cell phone out of his pocket and made the call, finally making use of it. He stood there and watched Buffy a little while longer, then noticed the stake sticking out of her pocket. He went to grab it, squeezing the wood so hard that blood was oozing out of his hand. He couldn’t seem to care. Nothing mattered anymore. Spike held the stake over his heart and stared at Buffy's body. "I can't be in this world without you, pet. I know there's no chance that I'll ever get to be with you in Heaven, but maybe someday, we'll get to be together again." Spike took a breath that he didn’t need and thrust the stake into his heart. "I love you," were his whispered words before he exploded into dust, the ashes falling over the body of his dead love.
The End
Author's Chapter Notes:
This is just something that I felt like writing. I know it seems bad, but I think it came out pretty good. It takes place in an alternate 4th Season, so things are definitely not like in the show. Don't worry, Spike has a reason for his behavior. I would like to think I'm not that evil, but I will warn that there are major character deaths in this one. You may want to have tissues close by.