Love Comes to Town by Soul of the Rose
Summary: Spike’s burning love for Buffy attracts Cupid’s attention from the higher realms. Intrigued, he investigates and decides to lend him a hand. Her stubborn refusal of Spike’s affections brings unexpected consequences that may lead to the loss of both Dawn and Spike from her life. Meanwhile, a prophetic dream brings her warnings of her own death and Riley is proving to be the worst boyfriend ever. How will our hero triumph? Stay tuned for sexy banter, adventure, romance and some really good smut… **NOMINATED FOR 20 AWARDS!! At Lost in Spike, Spuffy, Love's Last Glimpse, Blood Ties, Breathless & the Love Bite Awards. Thank you everyone!! UPDATE: WINNER MOST ORIGINAL STORYLINE & BEST FLUFF at the Love Bite Awards. WINNER BEST WIP & HONORED with JUDGES CHOICE at the Lost in Spike Awards. Thank you so much everybody!! :) **



Categories: NC-17 Fics Characters: None
Genres: Action, Romance
Warnings: Adult Language, Sexual Situations, Violence
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 50 Completed: No Word count: 130839 Read: 52401 Published: 06/18/2005 Updated: 01/30/2013

1. Prologue and Chapter One by Soul of the Rose

2. Chapter Two ~ A Girl Like You by Soul of the Rose

3. Chapter Three ~ She's a Lady by Soul of the Rose

4. Chapter Four ~ That Old Feeling by Soul of the Rose

5. Chapter Five ~ I'm Not in Love by Soul of the Rose

6. Chapter Six ~ All I Have to Do is Dream by Soul of the Rose

7. Chapter Seven ~ I Woke Up in Love This Morning by Soul of the Rose

8. Chapter Eight ~ by Soul of the Rose

9. Chapter Nine ~ by Soul of the Rose

10. Chapter Ten ~ by Soul of the Rose

11. Chapter Eleven ~ Love is the Drug by Soul of the Rose

12. Chapter Twelve ~ Do You Wanna Touch Me? by Soul of the Rose

13. Chapter Thirteen ~ There's Gonna Be a Heartache Tonight by Soul of the Rose

14. Chapter Fourteen ~ Ain't Love a Kick in the Head? by Soul of the Rose

15. Chapter Fifteen ~ Ring of Fire by Soul of the Rose

16. Chapter Sixteen ~ Tainted Love by Soul of the Rose

17. Chapter Seventeen ~ Painted on My Heart by Soul of the Rose

18. Chapter Eighteen ~ Witchcraft by Soul of the Rose

19. Chapter Nineteen ~ Where Are You Now? by Soul of the Rose

20. Chapter Twenty ~ Across the Universe by Soul of the Rose

21. Chapter Twenty One ~ No Such Thing by Soul of the Rose

22. Chapter Twenty Two ~ How Long Has This Been Goin' On? by Soul of the Rose

23. Chapter Twenty Three ~ Good Morning, Heartache by Soul of the Rose

24. Chapter Twenty Four ~ Ruler of My Heart by Soul of the Rose

25. Chapter Twenty Five ~ A Fine Romance by Soul of the Rose

26. Chapter Twenty Six ~ I'm Beginning to See the Light by Soul of the Rose

27. Chapter Twenty Seven ~ Knock Me a Kiss by Soul of the Rose

28. Chapter Twenty Eight ~ But I Do Love You by Soul of the Rose

29. Chapter Twenty Nine ~ Never Tear Us Apart by Soul of the Rose

30. Chapter Thirty ~ Lady by Soul of the Rose

31. Chapter Thirty One ~ Wicked Game by Soul of the Rose

32. Chapter Thirty Two ~ Hungry for You by Soul of the Rose

33. Chapter Thirty Three ~ Bedroom Dancing by Soul of the Rose

34. Chapter Thirty Four ~ Bad Girl by Soul of the Rose

35. Chapter Thirty Five ~ Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want by Soul of the Rose

36. Chapter Thirty Six ~ The Very Thought of You by Soul of the Rose

37. Chapter Thirty Seven ~ Trouble's Comin' Like a Train by Soul of the Rose

38. Chapter Thirty Eight ~ Hopelessly Devoted to You by Soul of the Rose

39. Chapter Thirty Nine ~ Right by Your Side by Soul of the Rose

40. Chapter Forty ~ Love Comes to Town by Soul of the Rose

41. Chapter Forty One ~ Monster Side by Soul of the Rose

42. Chapter Forty Two ~ Hot Hot Hot by Soul of the Rose

43. Chapter Forty Three ~ Super Overdrive by Soul of the Rose

44. Chapter Forty Four ~ Jealousy by Soul of the Rose

45. Chapter Forty Five ~ Hit Me With Your Best Shot by Soul of the Rose

46. Chapter Forty Six ~ Mama Said Knock You Out by Soul of the Rose

47. Chapter Forty Seven ~ Don’t Speak by Soul of the Rose

48. Chapter Forty ~ Eight - How Can You Mend a Broken Heart? by Soul of the Rose

49. Chapter Forty Nine ~ I'm on Fire by Soul of the Rose

50. Chapter 50 by Soul of the Rose

Prologue and Chapter One by Soul of the Rose
Timeline/Spoilers: Some Season 5 Spoilers. Takes place right before “Into the Woods” – goes completely AU from there.

Summary: Cupid pays a visit to Sunnydale. Wackiness ensues. Worlds Collide…This is how it should have gone – the Spuffy way. *Kicks Joss in the shin and boots him away from the computer*

Pairings: Buffy and Spike mainly, with some minor Buffy/Riley (sorry but I had ta – it’s a plot thing), plus Xander/Anya, Willow/Tara and just a splash of Giles/Joyce (no naughty stuff, just light romance – relax.).

Rating: NC-17 This thing is rife with smut and dirty talk (yeeeehaw!) – consider yourself warned. Some angst, here and there, but look for the happy ending. (Cause I like it that way, dammit.)

Disclaimer: The entire Universe is run (and owned) by Joss Whedon – I just like to play with his things. And I, unfortunately, get no profit from this – just the extreme pleasure of my own lewd imaginings (Yum).

Feedback: C’mon – you know you wanna - you know I want you to…


Author's Notes: Character thoughts are between ** If you are a Riley fan – DO NOT read this, you won’t be happy, I promise you. This was written for my fellow Spuffy shippers, with deep affection. Thanks for sharing my obsession y’all.



Love Comes to Town

By Soul of the Rose



“ Baby, I was wrong to ever let you down,
But I did what I did before Love came to town…”

- U2 & B.B. King



Prologue ~ What the World Needs Now


“What the world needs now, is love sweet love.
It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of.
What the world needs now, is love sweet love.
No not just for some, but for everyone...”

~ The Pixies & Burt Bacharach


*Who is that bright spirit there?*

The god of Love gazed down from his perch above the cosmos, somewhere on the mystical plane of Mount Olympus. Through the portal he viewed the vast darkness of Earth - littered with billions of tiny dancing lights, a galaxy of campfires in the shadows.

*I haven’t seen a heart shine so brilliantly in years, perhaps even centuries.*

Eros was deeply intrigued and summoned the image closer with a wave of his hand. There, there was that heartfire, twinkling merrily in the darkness along side a million others. It stood out amongst the many because of its fiery intensity. The little light seemed to be radiating its own joy. Was it possible that Love was alive in that sorrowful place? He felt gladness fill him, it had been so long, so very long since he’d been inspired by Love. Lately he’d fallen to merely doing as instructed, shooting his arrows here or there to satisfy some god’s plan or simply doing the mindless bidding of The Powers. Time was he’d flitted among the mortals, wreaking havoc, making mischief. But just as often he would be inspired to grant a shining soul the gift of sweetest, purest Love. It had brought him such pleasure to watch those exceptional couples together. Most lasting well unto death - often finding themselves together in Heaven, then returning back jointly to play life after life.
Such was the bonds he could create.

*Once.*

He thought bitterly. It had been decades now since he last tried. The state of the world dismayed him, hurt his heart. So much bleakness and dark down there. He was more than uninspired by what he saw - he was repulsed. What are they doing with their gift of life? Throwing it away, squandering any little scrap of Love they were given. What happened to those that cherished Love, that tended their heartfires? For that matter where had all the true artists gotten to? The musicians? The dancers? They had always given Love its due.

Eros supposed the Muses were just as disgusted as he, abandoning their duties save for when specifically commanded. Truly it was a wonder there was any light down there at all. But wait – there it was again! Glittering in the darkness, beckoning him…
The miracle of a light and loving heart.

It seemed someone was alive down there after all.




Chapter One ~ Slave to Love

“ Tell her I’ll be waiting in the usual place.
For the tired and weary, there’s no escape.
To need a woman, you’ve got to know
how the strong get weak and the rich get poor.
Slave to love, slave to love.
And I can’t escape I’m a slave to love …”

~ Bryan Ferry


Spike was parked in his usual spot behind the tree in Buffy’s yard, cigarette in hand. Waiting. Waiting to see her, to catch just the slightest whiff of her scent, waiting to be noticed or simply to be needed. He loved it when she needed him, when she specifically asked for him. It filled him with manly purpose. And Lord knows she needed him now, what with Captain Cardboard ready to toddle off ‘round the bend at any moment. Couldn’t believe the sorry bugger would be so dim as to…but, wait – oh yes he could. Stupid git didn’t know what he had. So busy feeling sorry for himself he didn’t know he was about to lose the best thing he ever had. Would ever hope to have, he corrected. Spike sighed to himself.

*Wanker.*

But good riddance to bad rubbish ‘cause Finn wasn’t good enough for his Buffy anyway. Not by a long shot. Too busy playing GI Joe and standing up for truth, justice and the American way to have the slightest clue about…well, anything really. Hadn’t a bloody notion about what Buffy needed, or about what the world was really like – not everything was black and white y’ know. Life just wasn’t that easily defined – unless you were 22 years old and from Iowa that is. Still a young pup, hadn’t seen anythin’ yet. Not like Spike. A hundred and twenty odd years of unlife opened a man’s eyes – gave him some perspective. And the things he’d done in that time – the lives he’d led, the blood he’d shed - poetic really. In a twisted sorta way. He snorted to himself, smiling. Then dug in the pocket of his duster for his silver flask. Ah, yes – everything a fella needed for a proper stakeout.

*No pun intended.*

Spike snorted again. He had a million of ‘em. Where was he? Oh yeah – Finn, the wank. Didn’t have a clue, and about to lose it all. He couldn’t help but grin. He was going to relish the boy’s downfall. Plus, his loss was Spike’s gain. Maybe then Buffy would realize what she really needed. It wasn’t a nice mid-western farm boy, or the soulful poof neither - she deserved better than that. She needed more than they could ever give her. But Spike could give it to her. He could fight by her side; he could love her good an’ proper (shag her good an’ proper too, eh?). He raised an eyebrow and smirked, toasting the thought with a deep draw from the flask. He could take anything she dished out. Unlike the boy – that she had to pull her punches on (don’t think Spike didn’t notice now), and Peaches who would never accept her as anything more than the virginal girl he’d known. A pretty princess on a pretty pedestal.

*But I know you, Slayer. Know how you fight, know how you love. Know what you’re capable of.*

They could be so good together. If she’d give him half a chance. She never would with Finn in the way. But fortunately the boy was gonna fix that little problem for him. He wouldn’t even have ta lift a finger, just wait for the right moment and show her everything. He closed his eyes and imagined the scenario. There Soldier Blob would be, some vamp slag suckin’ him dry... Buffy would be angry, tell the boy to get fucked. Then she would cry, and need comfortin’ of course. And Spike would be there, all strong arms and sturdy cryin’ shoulders. And he would show her that he could be a good man. That he’d changed. She would see what they could be to each other then; she’d have to wouldn’t she? That would be the beginning, just the beginning.

Spike imagined himself courting her day by day. Doing little things to help her and Joyce and the Bit, making himself useful like. Fighting by her side every night. Taking care of her every little need. He knew it wouldn’t be easy, that he’d have to earn her. But that was only right, being that he was what he was. He didn’t mind really. Because one day she would look at him, and she would smile that Buffy smile – the one that shamed the very Sun. And he would know that she wanted him, that she loved him, and they would finally be together. Like it was meant to be. His whole body warmed at the thought, and he smiled a singularly sweet and innocent smile. It was thus that Eros found his quarry.

A starry-eyed vampire in love.
Chapter Two ~ A Girl Like You by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Two ~ A Girl Like You

“Never met a girl like you before.
You give me just a taste so I want more.
Now my hands are bleeding and my knees are raw.
‘Cause now you got me crawling, crawling on the floor.
And I’ve never known a girl like you before.”

~ Edwyn Collins




You could have knocked him over with one of his own feathers at that moment.

*A vampire?! The brightest heart light I’ve seen in a hundred years is a vampire?*

Eros began to laugh. Of course – it would have to be someone (something?) unusual to give off that kind of radiance. Zeus works in mysterious ways indeed. He was still chuckling when he drew closer to look the “boy” over. (For what was 120 years compared to 2 plus millennia?) He winged his way round the elderly elm, eyeing Spike critically. Hmmm, comely enough lad. Seemed strong and capable. And this wouldn’t be the first vampire to be blessed by Love. There were few historically, but still there was precedent. It might be a challenge, but wasn’t he just itching for one? Something, anything to inspire him these days really.

Eros rubbed his hands together with relish, oh, how he was going to enjoy this! The god’s beautiful face was alive with excitement. His sea-green eyes sparkled and his golden hair and ivory skin seemed to glow from within. He felt the eternal power that was Love itself surge through him. He almost wept with the joy of it – it had been so terribly long. He was fulfilling his purpose in the Universe again, the protection and creation of Love. He was doing what he had been formed to do, nothing could be more satisfying.
He hadn’t felt this alive in centuries.

He set himself to the task at hand with relish. First things first; discover the object of desire…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy strolled home casually, enjoying the crisp evening air under the radiance of a full moon. Everything was lit in its creamy glow. It was rare for her to relax at all lately – with Mom being sick and Glory on their asses, getting closer every day. But just now, she was gonna enjoy it. She’d just left Riley’s after a very satisfying night of movies and cuddles. It left her with a warm comfy feeling in her belly. It was so nice to have something normal for a change. Movies and cuddles? Popcorn and kisses? For the Slayer? Why that was just plain crazy talk. Except it wasn’t. Riley had become her rock in a whole sea of crazy.

In a life where it was taken for granted that she would end the night with some things blood on her hands (not to mention her own) Buffy needed normal. Badly.
She was so tired of feeling like a freak, like an outsider. It dragged her down, made her feel defeated somehow. In spite of her sunny good looks and Fashionable Miss wardrobe, in spite of Homecoming Queen trophies and cheerleader uniforms, she was still inescapably the Slayer. An unasked for, deeply unwanted gift. But that’s Destiny for ya. No “And what would you like Buffy?” Just wham, bam, thank you ma’am and there you were - all Chosen.

Although it did have it’s perks now and then. Like all night stamina with your boyfriend, fun ass-kicky bits and it had brought Dawn into her life. And that was a blessing (Mostly). She smiled as she turned onto Revello. Her little house looked so cheery in the dark. The windows were warm and golden with light seeming to welcome her in. She felt deeply contented as she approached her home. Now to enjoy some quality time with Mom and Dawn before heading out for the aforementioned fun ass-kicky bits. Buffy smiled happily.
This was turning into the nicest evening she’d had in months.

*Uh oh.*

She paused on her walkway, the smile rapidly vanishing from her face.

Dammit. Spoke too soon.

She smelled his cigarette smoke before she saw him.

“What do you want, Spike? ”

She managed to pack her tone full of every ounce of annoyance she possessed. It was intentional. Why was he hanging out here again? Lately he’d been acting like some weird whipped puppy-dog. Following her everywhere. Asking, yes asking, to help, to go out on patrol, to do things for her. He was beginning to get on her very last nerve.

*Shite. She crept up on me. Best act casual.*

He’d been so busy daydreaming; she’d caught him off guard. He quickly pocketed the flask and stubbed out his cigarette.

“ Not on the tree, Spike! What’s the matter with you?!”

He brushed the ashes off the tree trunk hurriedly.

“ See? No harm done.”

“Except for that big burny hole, you mean.”

She was glaring at him, arms crossed with her head tilted to one side. Spike thought of this privately as her “ Holier Than Thou” stance. Her brows drew together in displeasure. It made him want to kiss her just between them and smooth away the knot. (But then again, what didn’t make him want to kiss her these days?) Oh, she was talking again,

*Stop staring and listen, you bloody twonk!*

“ I say again: What. Do. You. Want. Spike. ?”

“ Oh, well…I just wuz wonderin’ if you wanted to go patrol s’all.”

*Excellent, sounding casual. Good job.*

Buffy sighed and managed to add a whole ‘nother layer of put upon.

“ Fine. Wait here. I’ll be back in 5.”

She tromped up the steps to her house, her good mood evaporating like Spike’s cigarette smoke into the cool night air.

Spike was elated. He got to be with her, got to watch her fight, and he got to help. It didn’t get much better than that these days. He leaned back against the tree and lit up another smoke. He loved her best when she was fighting. She was a perfect feral beast, all hunt and kill. It was something a fella could relate to. He never saw her more alive than during patrol. She was on fire with purpose, doing just what she was made for. And she could whine about it all she liked – he knew she loved it. He could smell it on her.

That was another bonus of patrol. Wound up Slayer, putting off clouds of pheromones like perfume. Sweetest, most arousing thing he’d ever smelled. It made him hard as a rock every time, and gave him fuel for his growing Buffy fantasy collection. He had a small hope that one day she’d get so worked up she’d up an’ jump him right in the cemetery.

*Hey, it could happen.*

It’s not like he hadn’t imagined it enough times. In vast detail. (Ahem.) But best not go there just now. Buffy already seemed suspicious. Not to mention displeased. Though what he’d done he couldn’t begin to guess. He was only trying to help the girl after all. Probably just all the pressure she was under, what with her mum sick an’ all. She’d feel better after a good fight. She always did. And he’d get to watch her fight, and feel the heat come off her in waves during the fray. Then smell her sweet scent for a full twenty minutes while he walked her home. Spike sighed happily. Heaven. He leaned back against the tree and smiled with satisfaction. This was going to be the best night he’d had in weeks.
Chapter Three ~ She's a Lady by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Three ~ She’s a Lady

“ She’s all you’d ever want.
She’s the kind you like to flaunt and take to dinner.
Well, she always knows her place.
She’s got style. She’s got grace. She’s a winner.
She’s a lady, oh, She’s a lady…”

~ Tom Jones


Eros watched with fascination as the boy’s heartlight sparked up.

*Hark! She approacheth…*

He thought with amusement. He turned to see the lady that had this young vampire so besotted. Pretty little thing, certainly. She had a radiance about her, a strength and passion. He could appreciate that. He stepped closer for a better look and his eyes flew wide with recognition. There was only one being on Earth that carried that signature heartlight – a fast burning firestorm that would incinerate anything in its path. The Slayer. He began laughing once again, his luminous wings fluttering in merriment. It took him three full minutes to stop.

*Oh, this is too good! A vampire in love with a slayer… *

He had to contain himself before he started giggling all over again. Talk about a challenge. This was going to be a touch more difficult than he first thought.

Excellent.

He was going to enjoy this to the fullest. This was turning into the best day he’d had in decades.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


He decided to follow the odd pair out on their evening duties. He was observing professionally of course, but part of him was terribly curious to see an actual Slayer in action. The Slayer line was legendary, even among the gods. The First Slayer had been brought into being thousands of years before even his own time. It was certain to be something extraordinary.

Spike and Buffy hit Restfield first. The moon’s blue glow cast deep shadows among the tombstones and statuary. Buffy kept Mr. Pointy at hand, lest some nasty leap unexpectedly from the gloom. Or just in case Spike got anymore mouthy and irritating.

* Y’know – either way.*

She thought casually. She knew she wasn’t supposed to stake him, cause chip = harmless. But what if it was “accidental”? Would anyone actually miss him? She watched him swagger on ahead, smoking like a chimney all the way. Buffy rolled her eyes and sighed. She knew she wouldn’t. He’d been nothing but a pain in her ass since the day they met. Constantly making messes for her to clean up, one way or another. People to save, Apocalypses to avoid. And now that he was chipped, he didn’t even qualify as an enemy, but he still managed to make life messy (not to mention annoying) for her. At least back then he could be counted on for a good fight. She’d loved fighting him actually.

* “ I’d rather be fighting you anyway.”
“ Mutual.” *

Buffy smiled at the memory. Ah, the bad old days. She couldn’t believe she was feeling nostalgic for evil-Spike. But chipped-Spike was like a pit bull with his teeth removed, all bark and no bite. And the way he was scampering around all helpful and eager…God, pathetic much? It was just sad. Maybe she should just stake him and put him out of his misery…

“Oi, Slayer!”

Spike’s call pulled her away from her thoughts. She palmed her stake and prepared for a brawl, smiling.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Well this is interesting.*

Eros thought, musing. It appeared the vampire’s beloved was not attracted to him. At all. She’d done nothing but ignore his attempts to make small talk, pull away from his slightest touch and had even gone so far as to put as much physical distance as possible between them. Hmmm…it’d been awhile since he’d watch the courtship dance, but this did not seem to bode well for the boy. Unless she was like those French girls; yes means no, no means yes – and the pouting? But no, she didn’t seem the type. Far too straightforward to play at being coy.

*A woman of action.*

He observed, as she sent a vampire flying across the graveyard. It was a shame Ares couldn’t be here to see this. He always appreciated a good roundhouse kick to the skull. He’d have to tell him about the Slayer later, the war god would certainly appreciate her considerable fighting skills.

Buffy was battling a fat, sloppy vamp wearing a flannel shirt with cut off sleeves and ratty camouflage shorts. She sent a solid left to his jaw, and watched his head snap back with satisfaction.

“Now, I realize that you’re a guy.” Smack. “ And also undead.” Wallop. “ But didn’t anyone ever tell you…” Kick. Kick. “ That plaids do not …” Right hook. “ Go with patterns?”

Knee plant. Stake. Dust.

Buffy sighed dramatically, and got up shaking vamp ash from her clothes.

“ Boys.”

Spike wiped the remains of two fledglings from his hands and smirked appreciatively.

“ I’m a right snappy dresser.”

Buffy rolled her eyes at him, a slight smile touching the corner of her mouth.

“ I’m not even gonna dignify that with a response.”

Eros watched them banter comfortably as they moved on to the next cemetery on their route.

*Well, that’s something then.*

At least they could trade jibes. There was camaraderie there. The Slayer seemed to accept him as an equal during fighting as well. Not a whiff of soul on the boy and there he was helping her. Love was truly a miraculous thing. He tapped into the vampires’ heartlight again, warming himself against the blaze. The boy almost had enough for the both of them. Now all he needed was just a spark from her. He looked at the mismatched pair before him and sighed.

*This might take awhile…*
Chapter Four ~ That Old Feeling by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Four ~ That Old Feeling

“ I saw you last night and got that old feeling.
When you came in sight, I got that old feeling.
The moment that you danced by, I felt a thrill.
And when I caught your eye, my heart stood still.
Once again I seem to feel that old yearning.
And I knew the spark of love was still burning.
There’ll be no new romance for me; it’s foolish to start.
When that old, old feeling is still in my heart. ”

~ Peggy Lee


Four more cemeteries meant four more fights. Between them they dispatched seven vamps and three demons.

“ Buffy 10, Bad Guys 0.”

She smiled cheerfully, her face glowing from exertion.

“ That’s SPIKE and Buffy 10, Pet.”

He reminded her between drags off his smoke. He was showing no signs of exertion of course.

The jerk.

“ Oh, you’ll have to excuse me. It was probably just my natural inclination to never link your name with mine. EVER. Under any circumstances.”

She grinned with vicious humor.

“ Oh really now.” He stalked closer to her, lip curling seductively in a half-smile.
“It wasn’t so very long ago that you couldn’t wait to have your name linked with mine,
as I recall.”

“ Whatever, Spike…you know that was just Willow’s freaky spell…” Buffy pushed him away, uncomfortable at his body’s proximity to her own. “ Plus that was like a year ago.
Get over yourself.” But he wouldn’t allow her to move him.

“ If you say so, Pet…” He leaned in further. “ But there was plenty of heat in those kisses of yours…not to mention the way you just insisted on cuddlin’ up to me. I could hardly get you out of my lap all night.”

*Not that I wanted to, mind.*

He pressed himself close enough to feel her body heat through his thin black t-shirt, letting his voice drop to a low purr.“ And then there were those hot little hands of yours…” He looked her up and down, eyes traveling rakishly over her body. “…Everywhere.”

A lovely crimson stain appeared at her neckline and burned its way into her cheeks. His sapphire eyes held Buffy’s smoky green ones for a hypnotic moment. She gulped audibly. Then a rush of her scent hit him. She was aroused! The damn Slayer was turned on - by Him! Spike’s eyes widened in shock, and the spell was broken. Buffy shoved him back brutally.

“ You’re a PIG, Spike!” She spat.

Then she turned on her pretty black boot heel and stalked out of the cemetery.

Spike just stood there, too stunned to move. His jaw hung open and his cigarette burned forgotten in his hand. The Slayer. Had been turned on. By Him.

“ By Me.” Wonder filled his voice.

A spontaneous grin appeared on his face, and he was beaming. He wanted to shout it to the world. He wanted to dance with glee. Since both of those things would attract unwanted attention (or possibly get his ass kicked if it got back to her), Spike settled for a drag from his smoke and headed back into town for a celebratory drink at Willy’s.

The unseen god of Love smiled with satisfaction.

*Now this, I can work with.*
Chapter Five ~ I'm Not in Love by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Five ~ I’m Not in Love

“ I’m not in love, so don’t forget it.
It’s just a silly phase I’m going through.
I’d like to see you, but then again –
that doesn’t mean you mean that much to me.
So if I call you, don’t make a fuss.
Don’t tell your friends about the two of us.
I’m not in love, no, no...”

~ 10 CC’s


Eros decided to follow Buffy home to observe her further. The girl had ranted, stomped and stormed the entire way. He couldn’t have been more pleased. Here was the spark he’d been looking for. By Jove, she’d given him more than a spark. Watching that little exchange in the graveyard he’d seen her heartflame burst forth into a bonfire. It was marvelous. He was practically giddy. This was going to be the loveliest, fiery-est, most delicious match he’d made in at least a century. Wouldn’t the Powers be pleased?

Buffy stormed into the house, glad that everyone was asleep and out of her way for once. She barely kept herself from slamming the door in her fury. She whipped off her coat on the way up the stairs, practically stomping into her room to strip. What she needed now was a good shower. She’d get cleaned up and let the hot water relax her. And by the time she was done, she’d have forgotten all about that…that…disgusting, vile pig…

*And if I ever see him again I SWEAR…*

“OoooooH!”

She growled in frustration, and stripped off her shirt viciously. Her clothes came off in a fury, her boots making satisfying angry thuds as they hit the wall. She was too mad to care if anyone woke up at this point. Buffy stalked naked into the bathroom in a perfect rage. Every motion done with extra violence while a monologue of irritation flowed non-stop under her breath.

“ Stupid…blonde…jackass….” Growl. Snarl. Rant.
“Not to mention the way you just insisted on cuddlin’ up to me…” she mocked in a whiny English accent. “ …Couldn’t wait to have your name linked with mi-ine…” She sing-songed nastily.

She cranked the hot water knob brutally, almost taking it off the wall.

*Oops! Gotta calm down a little. Slayer strength plus aggression not good for Buffy’s bathroom.*

She climbed into the shower only slightly calmer. Dumping a gigantic dollop of shampoo into her hand she began scrubbing her long, blonde hair vigorously – muttering all the while.

“ Pig…” Grumble.“ Bastard…” Gripe. “ And who does he think he is anyway?!” She yelled at no one in particular. She rinsed with prejudice, and grabbed the beauty bar out of the dish on the wall. Getting a nice, foamy lather going she proceeded to wash her arms and shoulders forcefully, mind still on Spike. That stupid mouth of his, always running on and on and on…and he smokes too much, and drinks too much. Stupid bleach blonde. Who even does that to their hair anymore? Who does he think he is, MADONNA? She snorted. She’d have to remember to use that one on him later. And his stupid eyes, all big and deep and blue. What business does he have having eyes like that? Looking at her all sexy…

*Hey! No sexy! Spike is not sexy. In any way. Ever. At all. Okay?*

Yes, right – back to ranting…Stupid Spike with his…stupid eyes…

*Yes, that’s better.*

And who was he to just press himself up against her like that? Right, Exactly! Big giant pervert! All strong and loomy and… hard-bodied. With his voice all low… and … and…saying those…things to her. Those stupid …stupid…sexy… things…
Buffy looked down, and found her soapy hands circling her breasts over and over.

“HEY!!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


It was all down hill from there. She washed herself as quickly as possible and flounced out of the shower. She rubbed her skin pinkishly raw with the towel trying to erase any tiny smidgen of sexual feeling for Spike. And what was wrong with her anyway? This was the guy that had kidnapped her friends, threatened her life, mocked her boyfriend not to mention herself, and hey – try the fact that he’d attempted to actually kill her how many times now?

*What the fuck?!*

Buffy didn’t know what the hell was a matter with her, but she was damn well going to get over it. Now. She grabbed her most unsexy sleepwear from the closet; a soft flannel granny gown her mom had given her. This was the nightgown she always wore when she was sick or needed comforting. Tonight it seemed to be both. She sat herself down at her little vanity table and began pulling a comb methodically through her wet hair. Whenever she came to a tangle she yanked extra hard until she pulled through it. It gave her a sadistic sense of satisfaction. When her hair was neat and straight, she threw herself into her bed and shut off the lights.

The only thing that was going to resolve today was tomorrow’s sunrise. Thank God she had a new day to look forward to. It couldn’t possibly be as bad as this one was, no matter what happened. Buffy closed her eyes and took comfort in the small snuggly weight of Mr. Gordo. At least some things were still dependable (unlike her brain). Her anger had finally worn her out enough to surrender to sleep, and she did so gladly. No more icky thoughts of Spike, just sweet oblivion.

Eros chuckled with delight as he rubbed his hands together like an old-fashioned silent film villain. He’d been thrilled with the girls’ reaction, she showed all the proper signs. He’d hardly have to help it along at all. She was obviously attracted to the vampire, and had feelings for him, however deeply they might be buried. Now it was time to see if he couldn’t just bring those feelings to light. He set about his work with undisguised glee.

*Fuel for the fire, My Dear – enjoy!*

Buffy rolled over in her sleep, snuggling into her pillow smiling dreamily.
Chapter Six ~ All I Have to Do is Dream by Soul of the Rose
And now for the smut...


Chapter Six ~ All I Have to Do is Dream

“ When I want you in my arms, when I want you and all your charms –
Whenever I want you all I have to do is dream.
I can make you mine, taste your lips of wine
Anytime – night or day…
All I have to do is dream…”

~ The Everly Brothers



Mmmmm, that felt so good. What was he doing back there? It was just magical… His smooth cool hands stroked her back spreading the fragrant oil up and over her shoulder blades.

“ Oooo yummy! You got the ‘Sweet Papaya-Mango’…” Buffy breathed, catching her favorite scent.

“ I know, Pet. I remembered.” Spike’s voice was warm and sweet to her ears.

She wriggled contentedly under his weight. He chuckled and smacked her oily rump playfully.

“ Now, now, Kitten – keep movin’ like that and I’ll get distracted.”

“ Maybe I LIKE you distracted.” She teased, writhing with new intent under his spread legs.

He lifted up off her thighs and pressed his hard length against her, leaning over her prone body to breathe seductively into her ear;

“ Careful what you wish for, Baby.”

She felt his erection slide up the slick crevice of her closed legs to prod her in a well-oiled cheek. She rewarded him with a humming little groan, and moved to turn over. He laid a hand on her shoulder and pushed her gently down again, setting back to his work.

“ Ah ah ah, I’m not done with you yet. ‘Sides you need this after the fighting you did tonight.”

“ Fine then. Be that way.” She flounced back letting her lower lip protrude.

He grinned down at her and laughed.

“ Oi! Not the pouty lip! You know I can’t resist that…”

She turned her head and smiled mischievously, then shot him her all-time best pouty face.

“ That’s it, yer gonna get it now!”

He pounced on her with a roar, flipping her slippery body between his legs while Buffy shrieked with delight. Spike set himself to tickling her and nuzzling her neck affectionately. She retaliated with digs to his sides and stomach, swirling her finger in the sweet divet of his belly button until he broke down giggling helplessly.

“ How cute is it that your belly-button is all tickley?”

“Hey, now – cute? I’m CUTE now?!”

“ Absolutely.” She said laying a solid kiss on his forehead. He snuggled into her embrace resting his head on her chest.

“ Pfft.” He dismissed. “ I am NOT cute.”

“ Are too. 100% Adorable.” She teased, toying with a platinum curl. Spike lifted his head and quirked a scowly eyebrow at her. This only made Buffy grin wider and stick her tongue out sassily. He lifted himself above her giving her his sexiest growl.

“ Hush up you.” He closed in, threatening. “I’m the Big Bad, and I can prove it.”

With that he captured her mouth and kissed her breathless. Buffy responded by wrapping her legs around him and pulling him in to her sweet, slidey little body. Spike moaned from behind his clenched jaw and ground himself into her inviting wetness. She writhed blissfully beneath him enjoying the feel of his delightfully hard erection and gave him a low moan of her own.

“ Bloody hell, Pet. You tryin’ to kill me?” He gasped. “ Keep it up and there won’t be TIME for foreplay.”

“ Hmmmm. Don’t know if I care right now.” She purred, continuing her seductive undulations. He leaned in to kiss her hungrily then licked a path from her neck to her nipples, enjoying the tasty mixture of Buffy and sweet papaya flavours.

“ I care.” He rasped, capturing a rosy bud between his teeth. “ You know how much I love to taste you.” She groaned at his sexy words, and thrust her hips towards him. Ignoring this lewd little gesture, he chuckled and began suckling her other nipple. He diligently worked both breasts with tongue and fingers until she was panting hotly. By the time he made his way to the crux of her thighs she was drenched with her own arousal. He breathed in her heady scent, enjoying himself to the fullest.

“ You are the most luscious woman I have ever seen.” He locked eyes with hers before delving in with his long, feline tongue. “ And the sweetest thing I have ever tasted.”

Buffy thought she could come from his words alone. He said the sexiest, nastiest things she’d ever heard in her life. God, how she loved him. But he wasn’t done with her yet, not by a long shot. He’d just begun his slow, delicious torture, and history proved he could go all night.

*I am a lucky, lucky girl.*

She thought happily. Then shuddered with delight as his tongue explored every little sensitive fold of flesh. She open herself further for him, delighting in his attentions, the way he was pleasuring her. There was no shame in this, she trusted him completely. It had never been this way with anyone else. She could say that about everything she had with Spike really. The way he loved her with out reservation, the way he was always, always there, the way he took care of her. She’d never had anything even close before. And she had never been so ridiculously happy in her entire life, even as a child.

Who knew life could be like this? Especially for her. She’d just about given up on happy endings before they got together. She remembered talking to Will about it, how it just wasn’t meant for her. Her life was about the slay, and love would probably just get in the way of her duties. That was just the way it was, nothing to be done. Hadn’t that fact been proven to her over and over again already? Angel, Scott, Parker…all debris on the Buffy highway. How could she know the Powers had one last little treat in store?

*Or a really BIG treat actually… *

She thought admiring his erection. Love hadn’t gotten in the way. In fact, his support only made her better. Not to mention the dynamic duo they made on patrol. They moved like synchronized dancers they were so in tune. Plus, there was the added bonus of watching him fight – yum. He was too divine – perfect milky skin, muscular but not bulky, beautifully sculptured face. And when he looked at her – wow. Talk about hypno-eyes. He could stun her in an instant with those eyes - steal her very breath. And she could feel them on her anytime he was near, even if she hadn’t known he was around. She’d turn suddenly, and there he’d be across the room smiling at her. Handsome Devil didn’t even begin to cover it. She smiled dreamily.

“ And just what are you grinnin’ about, missy?”

“I was just thinking that you’re my handsome devil.”

“ And you’re my sweet angel, now c’mere and kiss me.”

And she was lost in his kiss, the taste of her juices on his lips, yummy mango scent and silk bodies sliding. His fingers stroked deep to find the pleasure spot that sent her off like a rocket, as his mouth sought first her tender nipples, then her sweet, aching cunt. He lashed her clit hard as he fingered her, sending her off on waves of multiple orgasms.

“ SoooOOO good, Baby…”

Was all she could muster. There were no other thoughts. Only his mouth and hands making her come and come and come… And before she caught her breath or even began to recover he was above her and sliding home – deep inside where she liked him best. He hiked her thighs up over his arms and began a rhythmic thrusting – bringing on the most intense orgasm yet. The pleasure of it never stopped, coming in waves that rose and fell. His name was a mantra on her lips as he rained kisses everywhere and told her :

“ You are so beautiful, Buffy”

And

“ I love you so much.”

And

“ Come for me again.”


She always complied. He had her on her back – then above him, sideways – then on her knees, seamlessly shifting from one to another. Every position brought new sensations and new pleasures. And always, always he was touching her, caressing her, worshipping her. He spoke to her throughout; words both sweet and dirty, words that made her ache and tingle, and often pushed her over the edge into a deeper, more powerful orgasm. He fucked her and loved her by turns until she felt she couldn’t take one more moment’s pleasure. It was simply becoming too much.

Who knew such a thing could happen?

He seemed to sense her need, and turned her gently onto her back again. Looking into her eyes intently he said,

“ I want to see you, my beautiful girl.”

Buffy thought she would weep from tenderness. His love and devotion were overwhelming – so complete. How they could exist in equal union with his lust and desire she’d never know. But that was him – that was what he gave her: perfect love and perfect lust, all in a beautiful package. She hardly felt deserving of it all. She lifted herself to touch his face and kiss him gently. Then said quietly, sweetly ;

“ I love you, Spike.”

He smiled down at her glorious as a cathedral angel, painted in shades of blue and gold in the candlelight. He held her with his hypno-eyes as he began thrusting once more. Even when she thought she had nothing to give, he always managed to find a little more – wringing every drop of pleasure from her body. He saved the best for last. As he rocked gracefully above her, he slid his hand between them and found her slick, tender clit with his thumb. He pressed gently at first, finally grinding down in firm circles. That’s when her Universe unraveled…


“ Spiiiiiiiiiiiike! Oh, Fuck…Spike…”

She felt him join her in chaos shuddering with the pleasure of it, and calling out to her:

“ God! … Love you, Buffy…love you…”


She awoke quivering with Spike’s name still on her lips.
Chapter Seven ~ I Woke Up in Love This Morning by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Seven ~ I Woke Up in Love This Morning

“ Do dreams come true? Well if they do then I’ll have you,
Not just for one night, but for all of my life.
I woke up in love this morning –
Went to sleep with you on my mind.”

~ The Partridge Family


She lay back into the pillow still trembling. She’d just had THE BEST, most intense, incredible orgasm of her life. And she hadn’t even been touched – not by herself (she checked) or anyone else. It was from a dream…a fucking dream.

*About Spike.*

“Fuck.”

It all came flooding back to her. How he had looked at her, how he had touched her. What she thought. How it felt. She remembered everything as if it were an actual event. It certainly felt real. She was still sweating from exertion, and her whole body was sensitive to the touch – as if she’d been making love all night. Which she supposed, she had. With SPIKE.

*Oh. My. God.*

As far as her body was concerned she’d spent all of last night having the sex of a lifetime with her sworn enemy. (Formerly sworn?) And unlike most dreams, this one showed no sign of fading with the morning light. If anything it was growing more vivid, little details trickling back into her brain. Things she said. Things he said.

“ You know how much I love to taste you.”

Buffy’s face colored at the memory of his words. His sweet, dirty words. She felt the flush spread down her neck to her chest, followed by a warm tingle that went to her nipples and…further. She flashed to a memory of him on top of her, inside of her – his voice rough and low in her ear.

“ Come for me, Buffy…”

And she felt like she nearly could - RIGHT NOW, because it was so, so real. She could almost feel him sliding his hard length into her, could almost hear his voice commanding her. She gave a little involuntary moan and then cursed herself for doing it.

“ Fuck!”

I am so fucked. What’s the matter with me?

One crazy little sex dream (about Spike) and she was falling to pieces. It was the most intense, amazing (orgasm) dream of her life granted, but still. It was just (sex) a dream, and dreams could be interpreted in many ways. She’d read that in Cosmo. The sex might just represent something else…like…like…working something out with Spike or something. It could represent the stress that she felt about their changing roles in each other’s lives. Sounds good, right?

*Yes, Dr. Summers – now tell me another one.*

Her traitorous mind was far from convinced. ‘Cause dreams about “changing roles” didn’t make you come in your panties now did they? And they sure as hell didn’t leave you a trembling wreck that was hungry for more. Which is exactly what she was, if she’d just admit it to herself.

*No I will not! I do not want Spike! I want a nice, normal guy…who…who can take me on picnics in theSUN. And out for drives, and can meet my family and friends without terrifying them. I want Riley.NOT SPIKE. Riley, Riley, Riley!*

Except that Riley, for all his wonderfully droll normalcy, didn’t make her feel even half of what Spike had made her feel IN A DREAM. And didn’t even approach the neighborhood of making her come like that. In fact, if she were to be honest, half the time he didn’t make her come AT ALL. And when he did, they were nice, polite WASP-y little orgasms that ended in a well-bred gasp. Not the toe-curling screamers that woke not just the neighbors, but the actual dead.

(Not like Spike)

“Fuck.”

She had no idea what to do with this new information. She was quite literally stunned. She’d never thought about Spike that way before.

*Oh, please!*

Her mind scoffed at her.

*Admit it, you know you’ve thought about him this way – since the beginning.*

Well, maybe. Maybe she had thought he was kinda sexy. And intriguing. Maybe.

*And this isn’t the first dream about Spike is it?*

No, there had been other dreams – nightmares! She insisted to herself.

*Oh, come on! This isn’t even the first sex dream you’ve had about him!*

Hey! Since when did her brain get so argumentative anyway?

*Don’t change the subject; you know I’m right. You’ve dreamed about him, you’ve thought about him and – be honest now – you’ve even gotten yourself off thinking about him. And last time you were with Riley-*

NO!

*Yes.*

No…

*Yes, you want him. You want Spike. Admit it – at least to yourself.*

“Fuck.”

Eros grinned mischievously, floating on a current of air just outside her window. He could see the look of consternation on her face. And feel the sexual heat and desire for the vampire just radiating off of her. She was so close. The dream he’d given her had obviously done its job. Nothing fancy, just a simple glimpse of what “could be ”. He was doing her a favor, really – look at what they could have together! Few mortals (or immortals even) ever experienced Love like that.

It was the boy really; his heart was capable of infinite Love. He had seen that clearly the first night. And really what better match for her? Who else but a vampire could survive the Love of a Slayer? Who could match her in strength, in stamina? Who could withstand the sheer heat of her affections? And frankly, who was man enough for the job? The Slayer herself was part demon; only another demon would be able to be her true partner. Any attempt with a normal man would be doomed from the start; her Slayer essence would either eat him alive or drive him away. For that matter, it would take a rather spectacular vampire to take her on. Not many would even dare.

He wondered if it had ever been tried before, if other vampires had loved Slayers. He’d have to look that up in the Akashik Records. He supposed not though, for surely he would have been called to create, or at least protect, such a union. If he wasn’t it must not have been ordained, something not meant to be which would therefore never last.

He shook himself from his reverie. There was still much to do. This union certainly was meant to be, and it would take time to build it before it could stand on its own. The girl still needed convincing. But looking at her, her face deep in thoughts of her intended, Eros thought it wouldn’t take much. A little push here, an elegant prod there and viola!

A coupling legends were made of.
Chapter Eight ~ by Soul of the Rose
*** I wasn't gonna update so soon, but you guys gave me such nice reviews... Flattery will get you everywhere, people. ;p ***


Chapter Eight ~ Addicted to Love

“You can’t eat. You can’t sleep.
There’s no doubt – you’re in deep.
Your heart beats, your teeth grind –
Another kiss and you’ll be mine…
Oh, you like to think that you’re
immune to the stuff.
But it’s closer to the truth
to say you can’t get enough.
You might as well face it
you’re addicted to love…”

~ Robert Palmer


Buffy dawdled on her way to the Magic Box. It wasn’t intentional; she just couldn’t seem to clear her mind of thoughts of Spike. All day she'd been haunted by that damn dream. Doing the most ordinary things it would hit her, a vivid flashback of their night together. The kisses, the caresses, the tingling touches. Dressing, brushing her teeth – every little daily activity had been saturated with Spike-ness. It was a good thing she’d taken a shower last night, ‘cause Lord knows what that would lead to.

*Very wrong naughty thoughts, that’s what!*

And that was definitely bad. And wrong. Not to mention dirty.

*And fun.*

Bad Buffy Brain whispered.

“No, not fun! Really… I mean it…”

She protested weakly, while people walking by stared curiously at the girl talking to herself. Buffy caught their looks and blushed furiously, turning away.

*Gah! Spike is making me crazy!*

Okay, so he always made her crazy, but this was up to a whole new level of crazy. He was invading her dreams, making her feel all confused.

*(Not to mention tingly)*

Bad Buffy Brain piped up. Okay, fine tingly too – but in a very bad, very wrong way.

*Oh, don’t act like you don’t like it. You LIKE thinking about him that way.*

“ I do not!”

She protested hotly, eliciting more nervous stares from the elderly couple passing her on the sidewalk.

Uh oh, better quit that before they decide to call out the men in white coats. She clamped her mouth shut and walked with purpose to the Scooby meeting, determined to put all thoughts of Spike to rest. Permanently, if possible. It was a gorgeous day – why not concentrate on that?

* Yes, great let’s just do that.*

Buffy plastered a perky little smile on her face (ala years of cheerleading practice) and focused on the beauty of the day around her. The fresh green grass, the autumn trees with their leaves just starting to turn, the sun shining brightly in the deep blue sky… She sighed and admired the dazzling azure expanse above her, dotted with sweet little bunny-fluff clouds, and her smile turned genuine. Taking a deep breath she allowed herself to relax and simply enjoy the day. Sunnydale was a pretty little town – if she didn’t know better she’d think it was downright idyllic. But there was something about that sky that bothered her. Somehow it kept drawing her eye. What was it that it reminded her of? She tried to ignore it, and strolled leisurely towards her destination. She hummed along to the song that had been buzzing around in the corners of her brain all day.

“ Baabyyy, I think I love you…but what am I so afraid of…hmmm, hmmm, hmmm…”

What was that song, and why was it in her head anyway? She shrugged and kept up her tuneless singing, closing her eyes and tilting her face towards the sun, enjoying its warmth.
She opened them with her face to the sky and caught her breath. Spike. That’s what it reminded her of. The sky was the exact color of his eyes last night in her dream…

*When he said he loved me.*

Buffy froze, stunned. Her heart was pounding and her breathing was shallow and rapid. She brought her head back down, trying to draw a fresh lungful of air.

“Calm down it was just a dream, Buffy. No need to panic.”

She told herself quietly. He shouldn’t affect her this way! And why did he? Why did she let him? It was just a dream. A stupid dream and it didn’t mean anything. No sublimated desires, no representations, no Freudian slips

*No thank you, I don’t wear one.*

Her mind supplied nonsensically. Just a straightforward, ridiculous, run-of-the-mill dream. It was probably because they had that fight last night - that’s it! Spike had been taunting her and making with the innuendos – and she always got turned on when they fought anyway so…

“Dammit, I cannot believe I just admitted that – even to myself.”

She cursed her betraying mind under her breath, stalking angrily now towards the Magic Box. Thank God she was almost there. At least the meeting would provide her with some kind of distraction. Bad Buffy Brain had been on autopilot all day, dredging up thoughts of Spike at every turn. Didn’t Willow mention a forgetting spell once? Opening the door to the shop she resolved to look into that.

*Immediately, if not sooner.*


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


“Every little thing she does is magic, everything she do just turn me on. Even though my life before was tragic, now I know my love for her goes on…”

Spike soaped vigorously, singing with gusto. He was in a damn fine mood this morning. And why wouldn’t he be? After all these months of being on the ass-end of an agonizingly unrequited love, he finally had a reason to hope. He knew a sweet little secret, didn’t he?

“ I have to tell a story of a thousand rainy days since we first met. It’s a big enough umbrella, but it’s always me that ends up getting wet…”

He belted out, rinsing off his chest. He broke into an impromptu drum solo on the washboard of his abs, sending droplets of water careening off the cement walls of the makeshift shower. Oh yes, he knew a wonderful secret indeed. His Slayer had a thing for him. Even if she didn’t know it yet.

*Just give her time.*

He thought smugly. She was gonna come around sooner or later, and he was a very patient man. He could wait. He could wait a long time – and Lord knows she was worth waiting for. ‘Sides, he wasn’t gettin’ any older, was he?

*Nope – still be this devilishly handsome for the next coupla decades at least.*

Spike smiled to himself thoroughly pleased and turned off the water. He grabbed one of the pilfered motel towels off the steel hooks next to the shower and stepped out, still grinning. Drying briskly he sauntered naked into his bedroom in search of fresh clothes. He wanted to look extra sharp for Buffy today. This was the beginning of an all out campaign to wear her down.

“Gonna kill her with kindness, I am.”

He said jovially, and tossed his damp towel onto the bed. Rummaging through his dresser for fresh clothes he continued his cheery singing;

“ I resolve to call her up a thousand times a day and ask her if she’ll marry me, some old fashioned way. But my silent fears have gripped me before I reach the phone, and before my tongue has tripped me – must I always be aloooone?”

Not only did he have a spectacular night with Buffy. But he’d had the most amazing dream afterwards. Buffy was the star as usual, but there was something different about this one. It was Technicolor, 3-D in Dolby surround sound and THX. Bloody realistic it was. He could almost smell the scent of her silky skin slathered in mango and papaya, and feel her slick heat surrounding him right now. That’s how clear and strong just the memory of it was. Most nights he woke up with a stiffy and some lovely, but vague images of her naked body in his mind. Last night he felt like he’d lived it, like he’d made love to the girl of his dreams all night long. He’d kissed her sweet mouth, tasted her skin, spent a half an hour devouring her gorgeous cunny and then shagged her into oblivion for the rest of the night. Left him with sticky sheets, but it was well bloody worth it.

“Oh yeah.”

He grinned lasciviously. Then began pulling on his black jeans, pausing to adjust his growing erection comfortably before zipping up. He patted his bulge affectionately before putting on a skintight black tee and tucking it in. Spike selected a silk dress shirt the color of burgundy wine from the bureau. He rolled up the sleeves casually and left the rest hanging, as was his custom.

Even though the shagging was brilliant – best ever – in fact, it wasn’t even the best part. The best part was that she’d said she loved him. Sweetly, tenderly and with conviction. She said it like he had always wanted her to, looking right into his eyes and touching his face. Made his heart swell even now just thinking about it. It gave him hope, like it was a sign from the Powers themselves. And who knows, maybe it was?

He stopped for a moment to sigh wistfully and then went on with his preparations. Spike grabbed his silver rings from the dresser and went looking for some industrial strength pomade to tame his wildly rioting curls. Palming a giant dollop from the bathroom cupboard, he began working it in.

“ ‘Cause that whole poodle thing just ain’t gonna cut it, Mate.”

Spike continued humming the love song he’d had stuck in his head all morning. Funny that – usually it was something more hardcore he’d find himself singin’. The Vandals or the Clash or somethin’. But today it was love songs. Oh well. At least it was the Police and not something truly horrible… like the bloody Partridge family.

*I shudder to think…*

Head thoroughly saturated with goop, he whipped his favorite black comb expertly through his slick hair. A few minutes manipulation left him sleek as a selkie, setting off his razor sharp cheekbones and the hard line of his jaw. Not for the first time, he found himself wishing he could have use of a mirror. Not having the Polaroid handy he’d just have to go with it, and trust it would do. He wiped his sticky hands on a Motel 6 towel and went back into the bedroom for some cologne.

He could still sense the sun – it must only be about 4 pm yet. Better hurry – he had a Scooby meeting to attend.

*Gotta go see about a girl.*

He thought smiling. Splashing his wrists liberally he brought them to his neck and chest. He could only hope to smell half as good as she did. Still, a fella had to make the effort, didn’t he? Spike grabbed his leather duster on the way out the door and entered the tunnels singing again;

“ Oh, I’ve tried before to tell her all the feelings I have for her in my heart…”
Chapter Nine ~ by Soul of the Rose
Since you asked so nicely... :)

Chapter Nine ~ Love is in the Air

“ Love is in the air, everywhere I look around.
Love is in the air, every sight and every sound.
And I don’t know if I’m being foolish,
I don’t know if I’m being wise –
But it’s something I must believe in.
And it’s there when I look in your eyes. ”

~ Paul Young


Buffy was immensely relieved to see that Spike was not among the Scoobies assembled at the back of the magic shop.

*Thank God for small favors!*

She thought grumpily. All the Spike-ness permeating her brain was making her cranky. Why wouldn’t he just go away? She seated herself next to Willow, frowning. Well at least he wasn’t here – that was something. She could pretend he didn’t exist for a little while. And hey, if she avoided his cemetery she might not see him all night. That thought cheered her right up and she turned smiling to her friends.

Xander plopped himself down at the large, round table and leaned back casually in his chair.

“ Has anyone else had a brain-full of schlock rock lately? ‘Cause I can’t seem to get this one song outta my noggin – and it’s really, REALLY bad.”

Willow looked up at him from the hefty leather tome in front of her.

“ How bad, Xand? Like Journey bad or like Air Supply bad?”

She made the universal gesture for gagging.

“ More like Bad Company bad – so not that bad I guess.”

He winked back at Willow, and she smiled at him mischievously.

“ Yeah – could be worse…”

He raised an eyebrow at her.

“ Wait a minute, what’s worse than Air Supply?”

She grinned.

“ I’m talking ‘Afternoon Delight’ bad.”

Tara moved to stand by Willow’s chair, giggling.

“Or If-you-like-pina-coladas bad.” She added with a sweet smile.

Buffy laughed up at Tara.

“Hey, I like that song. My parents used to listen to it all the time when I was a kid. I think my mom still has it on original vinyl.”

Xander chuckled at Buffy over the enormous pile of books in the center of the table.

“ That’s probably a collector’s item by now, Buff. You should get it from her. We could sell it on E-Bay and make a killing.”

They were all giggling when Anya came out from behind the counter carrying a small portable radio.

“ This is clearly your problem.”

She set the radio down on the table and cranked a small silver dial on its face. A deep, melodious man’s voice filled the air.

“ You’re listening to K-LUV Radio, Sunnydale’s all love songs, all the time station.
Stay tuned for another all-request hour. We’ve got Barry White on the way…”

Anya turned the volume down again then stood up and putting her hands on her hips.

“ See? It’s been happening to me for the past two days. One schmaltzy song after another has been wedged in my brain, driving me batty. I finally realized it was this ridiculous station.”

Xander eyed his fiancée quizzically.

“I didn’t know you had a radio back there, An.”

“ I like to listen to the stock reports when I count out the register.”

They all nodded in unison, a silent “Oh” of agreement.

“Mood music to fondle money by, got it.”

He quipped, nodding in understanding.

“ And then sometimes I like to play to music while I clean.”

She shrugged.

“ It makes it …nicer.” Tara said smiling at Anya.

“Yes, exactly – nicer. But then this horrible new station came to town, and now my brain is ‘all love songs all the time.’ I should’ve stuck with my stock reports…”

She frowned petulantly, prompting Xander to pull her down into his lap and give her a squeeze.

“ It’s okay, Baby.” He whispered into her ear. “ I’ll show you what love songs make nicer later.”

Anya smiled brightly, instantly perking up. Nothing put her in a better mood than the promise of orgasms. Except perhaps the orgasms themselves...


Unseen, Eros chuckled to himself. He’d forgotten how his presence could affect the mortal world. Love was literally in the air now, working its magic on everything around it. Not bad as far as side effects go. But what he was really amazed at were the people in front of him. It was wonderful to find so much Love in one place. There was clearly a sense of community here. The witches made a beautiful couple, and their heartfires burned so brightly for one another. He was deeply touched by their tender feelings, so readily apparent in everything they did. He wasn’t as sure about the boy and the ex-demoness, but it wasn’t his concern at the moment. They would just have to work it out on their own, as mortals usually did.

He had more pressing matters to attend to. The Slayer was still resistant. If she didn’t come around soon, he’d have to pull out the arrows. And he was loathe to do it. It was always the last resort. Or the first one, if he wanted to make mischief. There was the time he’d made Zeus fall in love with a cow…He chortled to himself remembering. He’d only escaped the god’s wrath by the grace of his Aunt Hera, Zeus’ wife. Tired of all his infidelities she’d been vastly amused at the young god’s prank. She’d told Zeus it was her doing, and if he didn’t like it he’d best keep his “mighty thunderbolt” to himself. Chastened, Zeus had relented. Hera was the only one he was actually afraid of.

In a true Love match, it was best to coax things along naturally. He only used the arrows when manipulation was needed. The Powers did have their plans, didn’t they? There were great lineages to found, heroes to birth. And sometimes that required two people who had never met to fall in love. Such had been the fate of the Lady Igraine and Uther Pendragon. They were mated to bear the hero King Arthur, though Igraine was married to another at the time. That had certainly caused its share of devastation. He hoped to avoid any such calamities with this pairing. Eros sighed and ran a hand through the golden waves of his hair.

He could feel the girl’s desire for the vampire. Why was she so damnably resistant?! The boy was quite handsome and certainly charming – if a tad rough around the edges.

*But then again some girls seem to enjoy the whole bad boy thing. *

He mused, pacing. His wings fluttered irritably as he walked. Well, he’d wanted a challenge – looks like he got one. He was just going to have to go on the offensive here. It appeared that this was to be an uphill battle. Ah well, nothing worth having was easily won. The vampire would have to do his share as well. Eros wondered if he should appear to the boy. Also something he reserved for special circumstances. He preferred to guide rather than push. But this young lady might require some severe prodding. He scowled, thinking.

*Looks like it’s time for Plan B.*

He reached into the fall of his ivory robes and pulled out a drawstring bag made of heavy gold satin. Walking widdershins he paced out the diameter of the sacred circle three times, then moved to stand within it. He closed his clear blue eyes and raised his hands in supplicant prayer, holding the bag between them.

“Mother, I call on thee. I call on Aphrodite, on Venus. I call on the force of Love itself. On all the Powers That Be.”

He raised his hands to the Heavens, opening his eyes which now glowed with a radiant golden-white light. His melodious voice flowed;

“ See here these lovers. See them well.”

The light covered him now, flowing from the drapes of his heavy robes, from the waves of his flaxen hair, from every feather of his wings. He became an encapsulated sun as the power of the ritual overtook him. He lowered his hands and reached into the pouch casting a shower of glittering granules into the circle. The image of Buffy and Spike appeared superimposed on the cascading sparkles for a moment.

“ They know not their hearts. They know not their true desires. I call upon thee to assist them to their destiny. Find them their path and plant their feet firmly. Open their eyes and unlock their hearts.”

He shut his eyes once more, and felt the Powers flow through him. The benediction of his mother was sweet and strong; he felt her blessing like a kiss upon his brow. Then finally the eternal, infinite power that was Love itself possessed him. If he’d had a doubt about the nature of this union, it was erased in that moment. There was no question now - fate was at hand.

Eros opened his sea-blue eyes and reached into the satin bag, gathering a small handful of glittering particles. He turned toward Buffy, laughing all unawares with her friends. Gazing at her intently he whispered;

“ Know thy heart.”

And then blew the dazzling grains into a cloud swirling in her direction. As it left the circle it became a whirl of glowing pink and red smoke, dancing and curling around her until her body seemed to absorb it – soaking it in like a sponge. She sat up in her chair suddenly, as a warm tingling shiver went through her like a shock wave.

*Whoa! What the hell was that?*

She thought, looking around to see if anyone else noticed. No one else seemed affected, all busy reading or talking just as before. Buffy shrugged figuring it was just her. Whatever it was, it left her with a deliciously sensual feeling. Her skin felt sensitive to everything suddenly. She was all too aware how the lycra-silk blend of her camisole felt against her breasts, and the seam of her jeans seemed to be rubbing up against a very naughty place. She fidgeted in her seat uncomfortably.

*Jeeze – get a grip, Summers!*

She scolded herself. Buffy shook it off and diligently returned to her research.

Eros smiled radiantly;

“ So mote it be.”
Chapter Ten ~ by Soul of the Rose
You went and reviewed so nicely for me so I had ta give you some more.. (I'm so your bitch ;p)


Chapter Ten ~ Good Vibrations

“ I love the colorful clothes she wears, and the way the sunlight plays upon her hair.
I hear the sound of a gentle word, on the wind that lifts her perfume through the air.
I’m picking up good vibrations. She’s givin’ me excitations –
Good, good, good - Good Vibrations…”

~ The Beach Boys


Spike sauntered casually through the warrens of “the Underground Railroad”, as he had come to somewhat affectionately call the vast network of sewer and electrical tunnels that ran literally everywhere beneath the city.

*You’d think someone had a bloody plan or something…*

He thought with a smirk. He was feeling cocky today, chock full of swagger. It must be that gorgeous dream. If he concentrated he could almost smell the scent of her sweet, wet…Oh, better watch it. Anymore of that and he’d be hard again. It wouldn’t do to stroll into a Scooby meeting with a sodding great stiffy now would it?

“ Yes, hello all. Don’t mind my 10-inch erection now. Just go on about your business.”

He chuckled, imagining the scene. He wouldn’t mind scandalizing the women really. But the whelp already gave him the eye overmuch as it is. That boy would do well to just come out and get it over with. Spike snickered maliciously; he’d have to remember to use that one on Harris later.

Today was gonna be great, he could just tell.

He’d had a brilliant patrol with Buffy – a revealingpatrol really. The scent of her arousal had told him everything he needed to know. He smiled broadly, remembering. Then there was that fantastic bloody dream: the shag of a lifetime with the Slayer. It quadrupled his high from the night before, made him feel like ANYTHING was possible. Whatever he wanted was right within his reach. Oh, he knew not to get too cocky where the Slayer was concerned – ‘cause look how that always turned out (usually with him gettin’ a solid ass kicking.) But still, he felt she was warming up to him now, and it was all just a matter of time.

*Wonder what hot little ensemble she’ll be wearin’ tonight, eh?*

He thought, lighting up a smoke. You had to appreciate a girl who fought in miniskirts, leather pants and halter-tops. Not to mention those sassy little boots. Nothing like a roundhouse done in heels. No wonder he loved her. She even made turtlenecks look sexy, the way she wore them – all tight, huggin’ every curve of her lithe little body. Spike sighed, deeply lustful. Any more thoughts like that and he’d have to hit wank number two for the morning. Not that it was a bad idea if he was gonna be dealing with Buffy tonight. Just the scent of her was enough to get him going, and when she touched him- even casually, it never failed to make him hard. Many’s the night he’d had to come straight home and ‘relieve the tension’ after patrolling. And the silly chit had no idea the effect she had on him. He thought this might just be a blessing – at least for now, look how crazy she’d gotten last night at just the mention of any feelings for him. He paused, pondering this. His eyes went wide with comprehension.

*Bollocks, last night! She was in a right tizzy wasn’t she?*

He’d forgotten about that – Buffy was seriously brassed off when she left. Spike felt his good mood begin to flag. Odds were, she was now harboring a grudge. Shite! Why couldn’t he ever learn to keep his buggerin’ mouth shut? Now he had an angry Slayer on his hands, when all he really wanted was a hot one. Hot for him preferably – but he’d take what he could get. But wait…that’s right- she was hot last night wasn’t she? And for him as well. Well, then, that was a bit of alright. He started walking again, taking a deep drag. Maybe she wasn’t as upset as she seemed. She was just covering, and when she realized that she really wanted him she’d come around wouldn’t she? Yeah, she’d come around –

“And stake me right through the bloody heart.”

He stopped dead in his tracks. What in buggering Hell had he been thinking? Oh yes, his dick had been hard…

*Well that answers that question. No thinking involved.*

Dream or no dream Buffy was never going to let herself get involved with him. She outwardly detested him – told him he was beneath her how many times now? And at least part of her actually believed that. She’d bought into Angel’s whole shtick about souls and nobility, and broody blabbity bullshite.

“Sodding Great Poof.”

He shook his head frowning, then threw his cigarette to the ground. He began pacing back and forth in the confines of the tunnel. And now she thought he couldn’t be any more than he was, and she would believe that he couldn’t love her. And she definitely didn’t believe that she could love him – she barely admitted to liking him. So could she stake him? Work herself into a big enough snit over her feelings and his feelings and …oh yeah, she could definitely stake him.

“Fuck.”

*What the hell am I gonna do now?*

Spike was not at all prepared for the sensation that abruptly accosted him. He caught his breath as an erotic shiver wracked his body. His cock hardened instantly. It was as if the full force of his dream hit him all at once. My God – he could almost smell her, feel her, taste her…

“Christ! What the fuck was that?”

Whatever it was, it was bloody marvelous. His skin felt alive with sensation - the silk of his shirt, the rub of his jeans against his bare skin, the leather of his coat against his neck. And he could feel the blood pulsing into his prick like never before. The thing was like a dowsing rod and it was pointing straight at Buffy. Just the thought of her was driving him mad. He was half tempted to have a toss in the tunnel right now he was so aroused. But he was already running late.

“Sod it all.”

He cursed ruefully. There was no way he was gonna miss an opportunity to spend time with Buffy. Especially when he’d have a chance to be useful to her. He stared down at the bulge in his pants.

“ Sorry, Mate – yer just gonna have to wait.”

Vowing to behave himself he made his way to the Magic Box, his penis helpfully pointing the way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Spike entered the basement of the shop cautiously. Listening intently for any indication of an irritable Buffy. Last thing he wanted to come face to face with was a grudge-bearing Slayer. His desire to see her, even a glimpse of her was too strong to keep him away though. That delicious feeling had propelled him here, almost of its own volition. And now that he was near her, the sound of her voice, the tickle of her scent in his nose called to him. He could no more leave without seeing her, than he could dance naked in the sunshine.

He paused at the foot of the stairs listening. Ah, laughter. That’s good. She probably wouldn’t stake him then. Spike slipped quietly through the back door that concealed the basement and strolled in with feigned indifference. He purposefully did not look at Buffy. Best to play it cool, act nonchalant. She didn’t seem to register his presence in any threatening way, just kept chatting with her friends. He leaned back against the counter adopting a casual stance and shuffled in his pocket for a smoke. Expertly whipping his Zippo open he leaned in to light it. Girl didn’t even notice. Maybe she’d cooled her jets a bit then.

“ Spike. Light that thing in here and DIE.”

Buffy glared at him with the fire of a thousand suns.

Or maybe not.

He made note of the special emphasis she’d put on “die” and flicked his lighter shut again. Nope, her jets were red-hot.

*Shite.*

The worst part of it, was that he was so distracted by her presence that he could hardly bring himself to worry about his own welfare. He was much more concerned with how it would affect his chances with her, or at least his chances of spending time with her.

*Bleedin' twonk.*

He cursed himself. He slid his cigarette back into the pack and pocketed them again. Satisfied, Buffy went back to patently ignoring his existence. He sighed. If only it mattered. If her indifference made even the slightest dent in his affections for her. It didn’t. Even now he was completely captivated. But he could only blame himself. Spike never did anything half-assed. He had decided he was in love with her, and now there was no help for it. She owned him body and soul.

Well, if he was to be Love’s bitch – at least she was a pretty mistress. He smirked to himself. She looked beautiful today (and when did she not?) She was wearing a sheer peasant top with a soft golden yellow and cream pattern on it, underneath he could see a silky camisole hugging the curves of those lovely breasts. Dammit, was she trying to kill him? Did the girl ever wear a bra?? He could see the smooth pebbles of her hardened nipples clearly. No wonder Harris was such a fan. The girl was built to tease – and she didn’t even know it. That was a good part of her appeal actually. Buffy had no idea how damn pretty she was.

*Good thing too. If she got any cockier I’d have to kill her m'self.*

He smiled. He adored her swagger actually. That cool self-assurance had drawn him to her from the beginning. She’d never been afraid, not once. Every move she made told him clearly: “prepare to meet thy doom.” Little did he know then precisely what form that doom would take. Some nights lately, he almost wished she’d just gone ahead and staked him. Buffy smiled winningly at Xander and brushed her hair back over her shoulder, sending a waft of her perfume Spike’s way. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, savouring it. Something sweet and slightly spicy today. White Ginger Lily it was. He’d seen the bottle in her room just the other night when he’d been…(ahem)... collecting. Mixed with her natural scent it was devastating.

He shifted his once-again rising erection under the cover of the duster. Damn, sometimes she didn’t even have to touch him anymore. Just a smile, a look or one tiny whiff of her and he was hard as a rock. It seemed his little obsession was getting worse. He wondered idly how long it would be before it killed him. Or before he wanted to kill himself.
Something had to happen soon.

He was this far from starting up the bloody poetry.
Chapter Eleven ~ Love is the Drug by Soul of the Rose
I'm such a review whore - everytime you write them for me I feel compelled to present you with another chapter... (gimme,gimme,gimme!)



Chapter Eleven ~ Love is the Drug

“ Stitched up tight, can’t shake free.
Love is the drug gotta hook on me.
Oh, catch that buzz.
Love is the drug I’m thinking of.
Oh, can’t you see?
Love is the drug for me.”

~ Roxy Music



Buffy was feeling more relaxed now. She should have known some Scooby-time was all she needed. She’d forgotten all about Spike and that stupid dream. Inside the comforting warmth of her circle of friends it hardly seemed real. This was what was real. Not some ridiculous de-fanged vamp and a dime-store romance of a dream. How silly of her to be so disturbed by it in the first place. In the bright light of day it was all too easily dismissed.

*But his eyes…*

Bad Buffy Brain whispered. Nothing like the sky. She assured herself. Nothing like the sea. Just stupid eyes. There was no soul behind them so what could it matter? The answer to that, of course, was that it didn’t. She was probably just having some freak reaction to all the stress in her life right now.

*But what about before that…?*

Bad Buffy Brain was weakening under her defenses. She could just about ignore that one. The important thing was that Riley was here, Riley was now. And look how much everyone loved him… Xander thought he was the greatest thing since sliced bread. He practically treated him like a brother. And Giles approved, and Mom approved. Dawn even adored him. And that was sooo nice. Everyone loved him and loved her and she fit right in to this safe little assemblage of mutual approval. And when was the last time THAT happened? The last time she felt like she belonged anywhere? Hell, she hadn’t felt remotely normal since …since before she became the Slayer.

*Wow.*

That realization hit her hard. She’d kinda known it, but never really REALIZED it. It ‘d been in the back of her head, this quiet knowing. But now it was front and center. Buffy desperately missed being normal. So much that it hurt sometimes. Yeah, she loved her work – she did actual good in the world. But it made her an outsider. A roll she wasn’t given a choice about.
One day she was so far inside that she was idolized. She set the trends, made the rules. She was on top, and everyone loved her – wanted to be like her. The next she was out in the cold, freezing to death with her nose pushed up against the glass. And she wanted back in.
She needed it to keep her sane, to give her balance, to prove to herself that she was still normal. Cause deep inside, in a place she kept thoughts that never saw daylight, she was pretty sure she wasn’t – not really. No, not at all. An evil little voice had been telling her: ‘You don’t belong - not anywhere.’ She was outside the outsiders, and it was so cold out there…

This was as close as she’d been to normal in a long time; inside this circle of love and acceptance where it was so warm. Her boyfriend was strong and handsome and stable. Giles was everything but a biological father. She had her mother, she had Dawn. She had the two best friends anyone could ever ask for. This was feeling a whole lot like normal life to her. And that was close enough. It was enough for her.

*Wasn’t it?*

Her subconscious whispered. Yes, of course it was. More than enough. And if Riley didn’t set her world on fire that was okay. Because real love wasn’t like that anyway. Real love was about support and respect and kindness. And he was such a good man. What kind of person would she be if she didn’t love him? That was not a question Buffy was prepared to answer. So she was just going to try and love him. And enjoy her normal life with her normal friends and her everybody’s-all-American boyfriend.

*Yes, good plan. Going with that…*


With his usual sense of impeccable timing…

Enter our hero, stage right.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


*Dammit! What is he doing here? Was he even invited to this? Who the hell told him there was a meeting? Crap!*

Buffy’s brain went into overdrive. To make things worse her body followed skipping right along. It didn’t give a hot damn that Spike was a vampire sans soul and totally unsuitable in every conceivable way. As far as Buffy’s body was concerned its divine right mate was in the room and it was practically singing with joy. This only served to irritate her further. There he was casual as hell, looking like some deposed rock star. Looking like he belonged here. It got right up under her skin. What gave him the fucking RIGHT?! To just sit there, and be so gorgeous, seem so touchable, so damn…fuckable. Like she could mount him right now. Like he wanted it. Expected it. Like it was simply his due. Worse yet was how much she wanted to do exactly that. Against all reason just get up, walk over there and climb him like a tree.

Buffy tried not to look at Spike directly. She felt the heat prickle on the back of her neck, on her upper lip, between her breasts. The middle of fucking autumn and she was about to sweat through her shirt. She licked her suddenly dry lips and tried very hard to ignore the tableau her mind kept presenting her with…


She would rise casually from her chair, like it was the most natural thing in the world. Crossing the room to where he stood would take only a fraction of an instant. And then he’d be there, right in front of her – radiating inviting coolness. And she was so very hot right now. She wouldn’t say anything and he would just smile like he knew. Like he understood exactly what she needed. And he would know. He would pull her close and kiss her slowly and thoroughly. And she wouldn’t care about anything anymore. Not about Riley. Or her friends. She would forget about Glory. About brain tumors and death. It would all just fade out like a darkened stage far beyond the spotlight they stood in. And it would be perfectly right…to just kiss him like he contained the very last breath of oxygen in the room. To undress him and take her time with it, enjoying the slow, tantalizing exposure of so much perfect flesh. To bare her self to him and let him delight in her, showing him anything and everything he wanted to see. Because she wanted him to see it all. And then she would feel his cold, muscular body pressed intimately against her own and she would let him have her. She would spread for him on the counter, letting him devour her wetness and suckle her breasts. She would lay for him on the floor and love the feel of his hard body driving her into the cold linoleum. She would bend over the table and enjoy the scrape of leather and paper against her nipples and belly as he fucked her from behind. And then in the training room…


Spike’s movement startled her out of her trance. She’d been staring at him from the corner of her eye for the past five minutes. Her heart was going a thousand miles an hour and she’d broken out in a light sheen of sweat. Stupid vampire. Buffy deeply resented the thrall he seemed to have over her today. Wait – what was he doing? She couldn’t believe it – he was actually gonna smoke in here! The nerve…as if it wasn’t bad enough that he was here at all…

“ Spike. Light that thing in here and DIE.”

She glared at him with the full intensity of her pent up lust and frustration. He had the decency to look abashed and put it away. There. Now she could go back to ignoring him.

*Good. Stupid jerk.*

Now what was that about the training room again?
Chapter Twelve ~ Do You Wanna Touch Me? by Soul of the Rose
Thank you all for your many wonderful reviews. I send you all great big wet smooches of luuuv (and a new chappie...)

Chapter Twelve ~ Do You Wanna Touch Me?

“We’ve been here too long, trying to get along – pretending that you’re oh so shy.
I’m a natural man, doing all I can – my temperature is running high.
Late at night, no one’s in sight and we got so much to share.
Talking’s fine if you got the time, but I ain’t got the time to spare.
Do you wanna touch, do you wanna touch, do you wanna touch me?”

~ Joan Jett and the Blackhearts



It had been a very uncomfortable meeting for Spike. Trying not to stare at Buffy, trying to ignore her tantalizing scent, trying to think of anything other than having his way with her on every available surface in the bloody shop.

*There was somethin’ I always wanted to try on the vaulting horse…*

Sod it all, now he was hard again. He’d just pictured it instantly, vividly; Buffy’s beautiful bare bum draped enticingly over the side, inviting him to spank it, nibble it and…his erection throbbed.

*Must. Control. Self.*

Being a walking hard-on was getting to be a serious nuisance. He was about to actually earn the label ‘Wanker’. It was every soddin' day now, more than once. He’d had other obsessions before, but nothing like this. Even Dru, lovely crazy Dru, had never gotten to him this badly. And he had belonged to her for over a century. Spike suspected he was getting in way over his head here…

What was it about this girl? Why did everything about her scream at him to claim her, make her his own? He felt like a bloody cave man asserting his mating rights. Spike smirked, enjoying the image his brain supplied of dragging Buffy off into his cave. She was wearing one of those little fur bikinis like Raquel Welch in… Uh oh, Buffy was frowning at him. She’d caught him leering in her direction and didn’t look at all pleased. He slapped on a frown of concentration and stared intently at Giles – a very decent facsimile of a man paying attention.

Something about that Glory chippie again. Watch out for the minions. Right, got it. Ooo, and patrol with Buffy, nice! Just him and her – ‘cause they were the strongest and it was right dangerous out an’ all. Brilliant! Alone time with Buffy – smelling her, watching her fight, perhaps a spot of lively banter…maybe he could even talk her into some quality time with the vaulting horse later. Spike chuckled to himself at that.

*Not bloody likely, Mate.*

Yeah, but a fella can dream can’t he?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy didn’t like the way Spike was eyeballing her at all. He appeared to be having thoughts of the no good variety. She wondered if he was planning something. But that was ridiculous; Spike was a puppy on a permanent leash now. He couldn’t hurt a fly. Plus he’d been annoyingly helpful and eager to please lately. Which meant… that he was probably having thoughts of the naughty variety. Equally no good. It was bad enough that she was having them. If he was having them too, and then they were both having them together… Well, that could only lead to very wrong bad things. Things that could not be named. Or talked about in mixed company. THAT'S how wrong they were. Things she could never tell her mother or even Willow about…

*Like Spike fucking me into the ground behind the front counter.*

Looks like Bad Buffy Brain was back with a vengeance. Damn. Although that thing she thought about doing with him in the book loft sounded kinda fun. She felt her eyes drifting up in that direction.

*Ooooo, the ladder. Didn’t even get to that yet…*

She eyed the steep wooden steps that lead to the off-limits books thoughtfully, mental wheels a-spinning. Uh oh, Giles was speaking to her, and she’d missed half of what he’d said.

“…. patrol tonight, Buffy.”

*Yay – patrol. Something I’m actually good at.*

“ Of course, Giles. No problem.”

“ Excellent. I think you and Spike can set off. We’re done for the evening.”

*Crap. Well, that’ll teach me to pay attention.*

Buffy remembered what it was she’d been thinking about instead and flushed prettily. She gathered up her coat and bag trying to calm herself a little.

It was gonna be a really long night…


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


They began their patrol with the cemetery closest to the Magic Box, both unusually silent.
Spike assumed Buffy was potentially hostile and treated her with the care he would an atomic bomb. He found this particularly taxing as it competed with his almost overwhelming desire to touch her hair, taste her skin and strip her naked at the earliest possible moment. Then there was his nagging erection, which had shown no signs of going away in the past hour and a half. And with a night of watching Buffy fighting ahead of him, he knew it was here to stay for the foreseeable future. He sighed dramatically and lit up a smoke, the word “priapism” sauntering casually through his brain.

Buffy was keeping a steady distance from Spike, not trusting herself to act rationally given the increasingly naughty thoughts clouding her mind. She’d kept to one-word responses so far, discouraging any potentially sexy banter, or arousing arguments. Things were getting seriously screwy. Whatever her problem was, it was getting worse. It was all she could do to keep her hands from winding themselves in his hair, her mouth from crushing itself to his. She settled for jamming her fists deep into the pockets of her fitted corduroy jacket. Better to keep her hands on a stake anyway, right?

*Right.*

She agreed firmly. She knew what she wanted for herself and her life, and Riley was it. These ridiculous lusty feelings for Spike were just a by-product of her over-stressed, over-worked little brain. It all made perfect sense. Still, she wasn’t taking any chances. She gave herself a few extra feet of clearance from him just to be on the safe side.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dammit, why was she so bloody far away? Was she still upset from the other night? He could hardly catch her scent from here, not enough to really enjoy it. Not like he wanted to, all up close and personal like. Of course if he had his way, he’d be smellin’ her from a vantage point somewhere between her legs. Spike grinned wickedly at the thought.

*Someday, someday…*

Hopefully sooner rather than later. He didn’t know how much more of this he could take. If his knob got any harder he’d be able to stake the vamps hands-free. It was getting so it was faster to count the hours without an erection than the ones with. And whacking off only helped so much. He was fairly certain his body was on a tear; it wanted the real thing and the real thing only. He couldn’t say he blamed it, really.

Meanwhile this buggerin’ hard-on was getting damned uncomfortable. He hoped like hell that the fighting would help. That was always an efficient way to relieve tension. And it was the only option he had at the moment that wasn’t likely to get him staked. Given her current mood, he was positive his attentions would not be welcome to say the least. And he somehow didn’t think Buffy would be amused to find him tossing off behind the nearest tombstone either.

*Ah, if only she’d help a fella out a bit.*

He was struck by a sudden vision of her on her knees in front of him, wrapping her pretty, glossy mouth around the head of his cock. He had to stifle an involuntary moan and was suddenly glad she was twenty feet away at the moment. His prick throbbed painfully in the confinement of his jeans, and he tried casually to adjust it under the cloak of his duster. This was getting bloody ridiculous.

Eros couldn’t help being amused at the scene before him. He could see the pheromones in the very air, could feel the heat between them as a live and palpable thing. And their heartfires blazed like a nuclear furnace whenever they were near each other. It was blindingly beautiful. And also insanely frustrating. He had never seen a pair more desirous of one another. Yet here they were yards apart, stubbornly avoiding the very thing they each wanted most in the world; each other.

He was THISFAR from breaking out the arrows. He observed the pair scowling, thunder gathering on his usually clear brow. Evidently this was a much more complicated matter than he bargained for.

No matter. He was up for the challenge. The only question was,

What could possibly be done?
Chapter Thirteen ~ There's Gonna Be a Heartache Tonight by Soul of the Rose
Here you are my greedy little dears ~ a new chappie just for you... (ask and ye shall recieve)


Chapter Thirteen ~ There’s Gonna Be a Heartache Tonight

“ Somebody’s gonna hurt someone, before the night is through.
Somebody’s gonna come undone, there’s nothing we can do.
Everybody wants to touch somebody, if it takes all night.
Everybody wants to take a little chance, make it come out right.
There’s gonna be a heartache tonight, a heartache tonight I know…”

~ The Eagles



Spike prayed fervently for a vamp to show up.

*Just give me a fledgling. I’ll take anything – Come on!*

He felt like he was about to explode – one way or the other. Either his cock was gonna rupture or he was gonna go insane. He wanted her so bloody much, in every possible way. And she could hardly bring herself to look at him. She’d spent the entire patrol 15 feet away and barely speaking to him. It hurt him with a physical pain. To make things worse there had been no demon activity tonight. None.

Not a single vampire. Fyarl. Lei-Ach. Nothin’. And if they’d ever needed a good fight, it was right the fuck now. It seemed like every minute that passed without any action, things got more unbearable. He’d had enough and was about to confront her – ‘cause fightin’ with her was better than this agonizing silence – when she called his name.

“ Spike!”

He turned around just in time to get it full in the face from a Gravitas demon. The brute was a mottled red-purple, standing six feet ten with a fist like an anvil. Spike’s nose hurt like hell, but he couldn’t have been happier. Finally - something he could fight! He vamped out and flung himself at the giant beast. For five full minutes he beat the bloody hell out of it. Bashed and smashed for all he was worth, carefully avoiding it’s sharpened tusks. When he finally wore it down to the ground he snapped its neck with a satisfying crunch. His face was bleeding and his hands were battered – it was a beautiful thing.

Spike grinned with satisfaction and lit up a cigarette. Ah, that was ever so much better. Nothin’ like a good kill to relax a bloke. He stretched his neck out, and checked his body for damage. Blast. His dick was still hard. He sighed, feeling deeply put upon.

*Why am I not surprised?*

But at least he felt better, less …pent up. He could always take care of this little problem later. Lord knows he was used to it by now.

*Wanker.*

He smirked, then turned to see the glare of displeasure on Buffy’s face.

*Oh, hell – what’d I do now?*

“What?”

He asked, unnerved. She just gave him a scowl and walked on.

“ Buffy…”

He called after her, following.

“ How long you gonna give me the silent treatment, Pet?”

She looked back at him, obviously caught off guard.

“ What…? I was not...”

He sighed to himself before elaborating;

“ You’ve said exactly five words to me in the last hour.”

She looked slightly bewildered and gave him a distracted apology.

“ Oh, well. Sorry.”

Spike raised an eyebrow at her.

“ So what is it then?”

Buffy looked genuinely confused.

“ What’s what then?”

Losing patience, he ground out;

“ What. Is. Your. Problem.”

She dismissed him indifferently, walking away.

“ I don’t have a problem, Spike.”

He snorted.

“ No? Then you’re doing a damned fine impression of a woman with a serious stick up her arse.”

Buffy flushed, irritated now.

“ Screw you, Spike.”

“ Alright,” he said casually, “if you think it’ll help.”

He stared idly at the chipped black polish on his nails, a bored expression on his face. Tossing his cigarette he turned to her - eyeing her lewdly.

“ From the looks of it, I’d say you haven’t had a good seeing to in awhile. Maybe that’s your problem right there.”

She rounded on him, hand extended for a slap – but Spike grabbed her wrist, blocking her. He smiled condescendingly, chiding;

“ Now, now Kitten. That’s no way for a lady to act.”

She was absolutely infuriated, and he couldn’t help but enjoy it. It had always been that way between them. And hey, if he couldn’t have fucking, he’d take fighting any day. At least she was talking to him now. Plus she looked bloody gorgeous; chest heaving, face flushed. And he could finally smell her properly. His eyes widened in surprise – no doubt about it, the girl was on FIRE. She was at least as aroused as he was from the scent of her. He licked his lips unconsciously.

*What I wouldn’t give for a taste of that.*

Buffy caught the gesture and pulled her hand out of his grasp, startled. Why did he have to look so sexy when he did that?! She turned away from him, befuddled by the huge conflicted jumble of feelings she was having. She was unspeakably attracted to him, when he was close like this she could hardly stand it. And that was so very many shades of wrong. She checked off the list in her head; He had no soul. She had a boyfriend. He was evil. He was a vampire. And he was gorgeous, and he knew it. He was smug and arrogant, and excruciatingly hot. She felt like bursting into tears. Why was everything so screwed up? Why did she have to feel this way about him? WHY NOT RILEY?? She’d never been so frustrated in her entire life.

Spike grinned impudently, apparently enjoying her torment.

Well, she had just the perfect target for all her frustration, didn’t she? She rounded on him, her face a perfect thundercloud of fury. Her voice was low and deadly.

“ You wanna know what my problem is, Spike?”

He cocked a curious eyebrow at her, feigning a nonchalance he suddenly didn’t feel.

“ You. You are my problem. Your smoking, your helping, your ridiculous hair. Your fucking presence in my life! Everywhere I go, there you are. At my house, at the Magic Box, at the Bronze. I mean what are you even doing anyway?”

His eyes narrowed and he matched her tone with an equally dangerous one of his own.

“ Helping you, you stupid bint.”

She had the gall to look amused at this. Smiling nastily, she mocked him;

“ Oh? And exactly HOW are you helping?”

He sputtered, furious.

“ I help you on patrol, for one thing. Just took out that nasty demon guy five minutes ago if you recall.”

She rolled her eyes at him.

“ I can patrol by myself just fine. And for the record I would’ve taken that guy out in half the time.”

Spike shrugged.

“ I was enjoying m’self, what can I say? Sometimes a fella needs a good bit of violence to set him to rights.”

Buffy seized upon this point;

“ And that’s another thing; the way you enjoy the fighting – it’s just sick.”

He was absolutely incredulous. The level of her denial was unbelievable.

“ Oh, and YOU don’t?!”

She crossed her arms in a self-satisfied manner and said confidently;

“ No, I don’t. It’s my job, Spike. I do it because it needs to be done. End of story.”

He threw up his arms in disbelief.

“ Anyone ever tell you you’re delusional, Summers?”

She glared at him, dander rising.

“ What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Spike smiled knowingly and moved in close to her.

“ It means I know you bloody enjoy it. You like it as much as I do – maybe more.”

Buffy shrugged him off, and slipped away from his looming form – dismissing him and his words at once.

“Another one of your little fantasies I guess.”

He grinned smugly, rising to the challenge.

“ Y’know, Pet – Vampires have an extremely well developed sense of smell.”

She arched a perfect brow at him.

“ Yeah. So? ”

Purposefully not touching her, he leaned in close to whisper;

“ That means I can smell it on you. Every. Time.”

Buffy hissed with shock and moved to pull away, but he whipped an arm out and held her there for a moment. His voice was a low rumble in her ear.

“I know when you like it. I know when you want it.”

He released her roughly and scalded her with a lascivious look, as his eyes seemed to crawl over her entire body.

“Like now for instance.”

Buffy was stunned. She’d never felt so exposed before, as if he’d just walked in on her naked. He circled her, enjoying having the upper hand for a change.

“ Y’know It’s funny, Pet – how you never seem all that excited around your little soldier boy.”

He paused eyeing her with amusement, then leaned in to whisper in her ear;

“ But you always, always are… around me.”

Buffy launched herself at him with raw fury. How dare he talk to her this way! How dare he try to humiliate her, to use something so personal - so intimate – against her! Her first smack connected cleanly to his cheek and sent his head rocking to the side. Spike roared with delight and laughed;

“ That’s my girl!”

This only enraged her further and she backhanded him with her closed fist – sending him stumbling back with a bloody nose. He reacted by laughing harder, then righting himself. She strode forward in full Slayer mode, ready to beat him to death if necessary. Her hand automatically palmed a stake from her jacket. All her lust, confusion and frustration channeled itself into this one moment of violence.

He stood in front of her in a loose fighting stance. He could do little more than block her blows, she knew – yet there he was wearing the cockiest grin ever.

“ I am SO gonna smack that smirk off your face.”

She said menacingly, advancing on him.

He just raised an eyebrow at her, smiling.

“ C’mon, Baby. Give it me good.”
Chapter Fourteen ~ Ain't Love a Kick in the Head? by Soul of the Rose
Thanks for all your awesome reviews - it's what keeps me slaving away over a hot keyboard everyday ;)

Chapter Fourteen ~ Ain’t Love a Kick in the Head ?

“Like the fella once said – ain’t that a kick in the head?
My head keeps spinnin’, I go to sleep and keep grinnin’,
If this is just the beginnin’ my life is gonna be beautiful.
I’ve sunshine enough to spread. It’s just like the fella said;
Tell me quick , ain’t love a kick in the head? ”

~ Dean Martin


Buffy was coming at him with a stake in her hand, wearing a murderous look on her face. But it was her eyes that were killing him now. There was a fire in them Spike was hypnotized by. They burned into his, brimming with passion and fury. Thank God she didn’t have an axe in her hands, ‘cause she looked hell-bent on homicide. Why didn’t he care about that exactly?

He only knew he felt alive right now and there was nowhere else he wanted to be. Nothing existed outside the circle of her regard - however deadly that regard might prove. Her face was flushed with rage, her long, fair hair streamed out behind her. She looked like a warrior goddess, like a Valkyrie in flight.

*Tell Valhalla I’m coming…*

He thought, unrepentant. She was on him in a moment – a blur of motion as she attacked. He could have laughed with the joy of it. It was all so right, just as it should be between them – as it had been from the very beginning. How long was it since they’d truly fought? It felt like an eternity. His only regret was that he could not give her the battle she deserved. The chip would not allow it. He could block her, and as long as he had no intention to harm her he was fine. But he missed the dance. Their dance.

Spike would take what he could get right now though. And watching her as she tried to beat him within an inch of his un-life was pretty damn good. Her skin was glistening with a light sheen of sweat, her hair mussed, lips moist and parted as she panted from exertion. She was the most entrancing thing he had ever seen. He could hear the pounding of her heart, feel the heat coming off her in waves – but best of all he could smell her. There was a light tang of ginger-lily mixed in with the scent of her excitement. It made his mouth water. She was more aroused than she had ever been around him before and it thrilled him to no end. He knew it was for him, all for him…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy was beating him down with everything she had. But he never stopped smiling. He just ducked and weaved, blocking her when he could. She used the stake like a set of brass knuckles, buttressing her punches. She managed to smash him in the jaw, and watched his head snap back with satisfaction. Bastard. She kicked him square in the chest and watched him fly a dozen feet landing hard on his ass. It made her want to giggle hysterically. She noticed how giddy she felt, how high. She was actually enjoying herself. This didn’t surprise her too terribly much – she’d always loved fighting him. No one else challenged her like Spike. Even now, when he should be five minutes from a total K.O., he was still holding his own.

As if to prove her point, he leapt up from the ground and came stalking back, grin still firmly in place. Buffy whipped off her jacket and tossed it on the grass. She placed herself in a fighting stance: body cocked to one side, leading with her right fist. She was ready for him.

“ Feel better, Kitten? Release some of that nasty tension?”

His voice was oozing with insincerity. She shot him a brightly vicious smile.

“ As a matter of fact, I feel great. But then again I always did enjoy kicking your ass.”

“ Tell ya a secret, Pet…” He whispered conspiratorially “ So did I.”

He winked at her and pursed his lips in a mocking kiss.

It had the desired effect, inciting Buffy to lunge for him. He avoided her neatly, but found himself staggering back from a solid boot to the head a minute later. He laughed, ears ringing.

“ That’s right, Baby. Put it all on me.”

He shook his head to clear the bells and stood his ground, eyeing her impudently.

“ You know it’s no good for you to be so bloody pent up, Slayer.”

He said with mock concern, dancing like a boxer in front of her. Ready for Round 10.

Ooooo! He was so infuriating. What did it take to beat him down? His ego was unbelievable! She’d used him as a human punching bag for the last half hour. He couldn’t even hit her back for God’s sake! But there he was, cocky as ever – smiling, laughing, taunting her. His mouth just kept working overtime. What the hell was it gonna take??

Buffy looked her adversary up and down, sizing him up – taking him in. As if he was a puzzle she could solve with careful study. His platinum hair glowed in the darkness and the moonlight played on the sharp, handsome planes of his face. The blood on his lip only accented the finely cut sensuality of his full mouth, which was twisted up into an insolent smirk at the moment. He looked dangerous and sexy and far too pleased with himself.

She was reminded of a line from Peter Pan, and could practically hear Spike crowing it now:

“ Oh the cleverness of me! ”

That struck a chord – there was only one thing that ever quieted the Pan.
Finally Buffy seized upon the single thing in the world that would shut Spike up.

She kissed him.
Chapter Fifteen ~ Ring of Fire by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Fifteen ~ Ring of Fire

“Love is a burning thing, and it makes a fiery ring.
Bound by wild desire, I fell into a ring fire.
I fell in to a burnin’ ring of fire.
I went down, down, down and the flames went higher.
And it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire.
The ring of fire.”

~ Johnny Cash



Was this really happening? Was Buffy actually in his arms right now? One minute she was beating the piss out of him, the next she’d launched herself at his mouth. The feverish heat of her body seared him through his clothes. Her mouth was so hot and wet and inviting – and her body, thrumming with life – the musky animal tang of her blood and her flesh. It was fiercely intoxicating. This was so much better than anything he could have possibly imagined.

*If this is another dream I don’t ever want to wake up.*

Her hands wound themselves in his hair while she kissed him ravenously. Now that she started this, she was lost in it. There was no thought involved, just the final, overwhelming urge to join. Her body rejoiced madly. ‘At last, at last it!’ it cried. The feel of him was incredible – he was cool everywhere she was hot, soothing the aching fire that had been burning her for days now.

Her legs wrapped around his waist of their own accord, seeking closeness, seeking contact. Her arms snaked tight around his neck as she clung to him. ‘More, more, more!’ her body howled. She felt like she was starving for things she didn’t have names for, things only he possessed. It was perfect, mindless connection – a feverish and deeply primal thing. All questions, rationales and plans snuffed out of existence like candle flames, leaving Spike the only light in that darkness.

He was waiting for spontaneous combustion to kick in. She was a live flame in his arms, liquid sunshine that was about to burn him up from the inside out. When she wrapped her legs around him he gasped from the raw heat of her pressed up against him. He was barely containing himself, his demon was screaming to get out – to take her right here, right now. To fuck her and drink her till he’d had his fill. But Spike wanted more than that, he wanted to lay her out and enjoy her, taste her - love her. For more than just one night, more than a week, a month or a year. Forever was on his mind, and at the moment it seemed like barely enough time.

He pushed her up against the nearest convenient tree, grinding his rock hard length into her sultry heat. His hands sought contact with her naked flesh and wormed their way up under her clothes. He caressed her exposed back with one hand, reveling in the silk of her skin – while the other found her bare breast underneath the camisole. She moaned at his touch and tightened her legs, writhing against him.

God, how he’d dreamt of this. So many nights longing for her – and now, this moment – it was so much better than any fantasy he’d ever had. She was blisteringly hot, and he could feel her arousal soaking through the crotch of her jeans. The smell of it was driving him mad. He didn’t know how much longer he could hang on before he literally ripped her clothes off and simply took her. He wanted to taste her so much, to feel her thighs wrapped around his neck. He wanted to make her come more than he wanted blood right now. And to be inside her? He wanted that more than he wanted to live.

Her nipple was a hard little pebble against his palm, and he pulled away from her kiss to taste it. He gently set her on her feet while he moved down her body to expose her breasts. They were unbelievably perfect – small and firm, just the right size for his hand. He licked between them and was gratified to watch a row of goosebumps pop up where his tongue had been. Her flesh was delicious, tinged with the salt of her sweat – her nipple like rough satin in his mouth. He swirled his tongue over it enjoying the texture, while he rolled the other one between his thumb and forefinger.

She was panting hotly and making little mewls of pleasure. He moved down her stomach, kissing it and licking it slowly until he was on his knees before her. The smell of her sweet, dripping cunt was like a drug for him. He inhaled deeply, savouring it. He undid the button on her low-rise jeans and carefully unzipped her. This was so much farther than he’d ever hoped to go, it almost didn’t seem real. But here he was on his knees, about to do what he had only dared dream.

She was wearing a pair of ivory lace panties sheer enough to see her dark curls through. His mouth watered for a taste of her, and he wasn’t about to deny himself the pleasure. He pulled her g-string down and her jeans open as far as he could – not wanting to take them off quite yet. He wanted to draw out every single moment of their pleasure. Using his fingers he spread her lips open slightly and then slid his tongue in between them. Buffy arched into his mouth with a strangled cry. He snaked his tongue inside her as far as the limited position would allow and was rewarded with a flood of her juices. She was so wet for him – for him. The thought made his already hardened cock swell and throb against his jeans.

*Soon, soon…*

He thought hungrily. He pistoned his tongue in and out of her , savouring such an intimate taste of his beloved. She panted and shivered lacing her fingers through his hair – holding on while the world spun dizzily around her. He pulled out to flutter over her clit with a series of light, teasing strokes. When he wrapped his lips around it and sucked it into his mouth Buffy cried out and her knees buckled. He rose up to steady her, pinning her against the tree.

“There, there…” he soothed, “Daddy’s got you now.”

He kissed her soundly, sliding his tongue into her mouth and twining his hand in the silky hairs at the nape of her neck. He worked his way to her throat, scraping it lightly with his teeth and teasing it with gentle flicks of his tongue. She whimpered helplessly, completely under his thrall now. He took her hand and placed it over the solid bulge in his pants.

“ See what you do to me… how much I want you.”

He said huskily. She moaned and grasped it through his jeans, making him shudder. He sucked her lower lip and gently bit it, savouring the taste of her and then proceeded to kiss her languorously. When his hand found its way back inside her saturated panties she cried out against his mouth while squeezing his cock firmly. The pleasure-pain of it made him want to come right then and he struggled for control.

He caressed her clit with his middle finger for a moment then worked his hand in between her legs to slip a slick digit within her. Buffy gasped causing him to look at her. He was caught for a moment by her radiant green eyes. They reflected the same powerful desire and hungry yearning he felt for her. He slid another finger inside and watched her pupils dilate with the pleasure of it. Staring into his eyes she moved her hands to his jeans, unzipping him and freeing his erection.

He groaned as he felt her hot little hands wrap around him. So soft and warm against his naked flesh. She caressed the head with the pad of her thumb, swirling the pearl of moisture that had collected there over it in a circular pattern. Now she had him panting. Eyes locked on his she raised that thumb to her mouth and sucked it, humming with pleasure at his salty taste. The gesture undid him.

With a ravenous growl he crushed his mouth to hers, hand clutched in her hair, pulling her to him fiercely. He slid his fingers deeper within her and added his thumb to her clit, circling it. Kissing him violently she used his foreskin to manipulate his cock, sliding it up and down over the length. It was so cool, so large – she wondered how it would feel inside of her, if it would put out her blazing fire.

They devoured each other with kisses while their hands worked furiously. She spread her legs wider for him as he slid his fingers further inside. Spike braced himself against the tree with one hand as she industriously stroked his cock. He could feel her orgasm coming on, her thighs twitching and muscles just starting to contract. When her wandering fingers found their way to his nipple and tweaked it he knew he wasn’t far from his own either. He located her G-spot and then stroked over it with both fingers in a ‘come hither’ movement. Buffy rewarded him with a wail of pleasure, then doubled her efforts. He didn’t want it to end yet though, Spike wanted to take her somewhere and make it last all night – maybe all week.

“ Baby, Buffy – please. Want you so much…let me...let’s...”

He murmured into her ear, resting his forehead against hers.

“ Yeah, Spike…so good. Close…close now…”

God, she’d said his name. Told him how good it was. He could die happy – almost.

“ Love, let’s go somewhere…lemme take you somewhere…”

What? What was he saying? Go? Where was there to go? There was only here, and how he was making her feel right this second – like the entire Universe was about to explode. She felt his fingers driving deep while his thumb ground down on her sensitive clit. God, it was so fucking good, like nothing she’d ever felt before.

“ So close…Oh God...” She whimpered in his ear.

Ah, Christ - she was so wet, and he wanted to be inside her so much. Wanted to feel that slick intoxicating heat closing all around him.

“ Baby, let’s go now…wanna take you to my crypt … to my bed. Let me take you…do you proper…” He panted.

If he could just get her home… God, he wanted to strip those clothes off, wanted to have her in his bed with room to move and time to explore every bit of her. He’d keep her there for the next month…

“What?”

She asked, startled. What did he say? Her hands stopped moving.

“ I said; let me take you home, Pet. Do you proper.”

He managed to gasp, hand still working it’s magic.

“ That’s not what you said.”

She stilled that hand, pulling away.

Oh God, he said crypt... He wants to take me to his CRYPT! What am I doing? What have I done?

“ It is. Just want to get you into my bed, Love – you know pillows, room to maneuver?” He kissed her shoulder. “Clean sheets instead of the ground…”

“ You said CRYPT Spike.”

He stared at her, completely bewildered.

*What’s she going on about?*

“ You said crypt. And I can’t do this.”

“What?”

“ I forgot for a minute. But now I remember. And I. Can’t. Do. This.”

“ What? Wait. WHAT??”

She was pulling away from him, zipping up, tucking away all that delightful flesh. He could see her almost visibly retreat inside herself.

“ You said crypt, Spike.” She repeated as if to a singularly stupid child. “ You said CRYPT - you want to whisk me away to your crypt like it’s the ‘No Tell Motel’ and what?! You can’t even love me, you have no soul, you’re a fucking vampire and I don’t have any fucking idea what
I’m doing anymore!!”

“ Angel was a vampire.”

He said quietly, carefully putting away his now painfully throbbing erection.

“ Angel had a soul.”

Her voice was flat, as if this were a well-established fact they had discussed a thousand times.

“ Ah, but not all the time, yeah? And therein lies the rub.”

Spike adjusted himself carefully, vainly seeking a comfortable position.

“ What the hell are you talking about? Speak English.”

She smoothed her clothes and found her jacket on the ground. Brushing it off she studiously avoided his eyes. His voice was soothing, seeking to calm her.

“ I was, Pet. But no matter. My point is that Angel had a soul, ’cept when he didn’t and that’s what you’re afraid of.”

Buffy threw up her hands in frustration and started pacing.

“ What I’m afraid of is the agonizing oblivion that lies at the end of this road. Been there, done that. Got the t-shirt that says: ‘My boyfriend was a homicidal vampire and all I got was this lousy guilt complex.’ ”

She said in her best sarcastic tone. She tried to make him understand;

“ I know this story, I know how it ends. With death and pain and destruction. I won’t put the people I love through that again. Hell, I won’t put MYSELF through that again.”

“ You do NOT know the end of this story, ‘cause you don’t know me! I’m not bloody Angel!”

He shouted, losing patience. She eyed him coldly, sizing him up and finding him wanting.

“ You’re right – you’re not Angel. You’re not half the man he is.”

He was stunned, he felt as if she’d slapped him. To be compared unfavorably with the Poof, that manipulative buggering fuck! It made him feel ill.

“ And don’t I know you, Spike?” she continued with cruel precision. “My perfect enemy? My nemesis? William the Bloody – Killer of killers? Slayer of Slayers? The scourge of Europe…blah, blah, blah…”

She dismissed him and all his titles with a haughty flip of her hand.

“ That’s not me anymore.”

His voice held a quiet conviction.

“ Why? Because you have that chip in your head? That’s not a substitute for a soul, Spike.”

“ Never said it was, but it doesn’t mean that I can’t love you, Buffy. Because believe me I -”

She held up her hand – stop in the name of love.

“ Don’t say it! Just don’t…”

He pleaded with her;

“ But I’ve changed! And not just because of the chip! Because of you, I’ve changed because of you. You make me want to be a better man, Buffy – and I can be.
I can be a good man, for YOU.”

Her voice rose to an almost hysterical pitch;

“ But you’re not a man! And it wouldn’t matter even if you did have a soul – you’d still be a vampire. And I’m not going there anymore. I just can’t.” She shook her head, adamant – then continued, “ Don’t you get it? I want normal, I need normal! I need Riley, he’s strong and stable and reliable…”

Spike sighed and lit up a cigarette.

“ Sounds like a bleedin’ draft horse, not a boyfriend.”

He took a long, steadying drag and began pacing out his frustration.

“Haven’t you figured out yet that there is no normal? Normal’s just the status quo. Look around you – your best friend’s a gay witch, vampires are real and you live on a Hellmouth. Guess what, Princess – this is about as ‘normal’ as you’re likely to get!”

She rolled her eyes at his stubborn lack of comprehension.

“You know what I mean Spike. I want average-normal, sitcom-normal. I want a nice boyfriend; I want to go to college. I wanna have a good life with my friends and family and a little happiness. And most of all I don’t want to have to kill any of them!”

Spike stopped pacing and looked at her squarely. Gently, patiently he tried to explain;

“ Well, I’m sorry, Love. But that’s just not the lot you drew. You’re the Slayer, like it or no. And that means you have to kill things. Maybe even someone you love someday. But doesn’t that mean you should reach for your happiness with both hands now, while you can? Doesn’t that make it all the more precious?”

Frustrated at the brick wall she was throwing up, he growled;

“ And what’s so soddin’ fascinating about normal anyway? Normal is bland – normal is boring. And that’s the last thing you are, Pet. I’d wager it’s the last thing you need too…”

“ You DON'T know what I need! And you DON'T KNOW ME!” She shouted.

He matched her in tone and volume;

“ YES I BLOODY WELL DO! I know you better than you know yourself, and that’s what scares the piss out of you. This just might be the real thing, and you can’t handle that. Too scared to love because you might be hurt. Too scared to love me because of what that might say about you. Angel you could justify, rationalize. He had a soul and all that shite. But what if that had nothing to do with it? What if you just wanted him - his demon, his darkness. What if that’s part of why you want me?”

Buffy just gaped at him, speechless.

“ You say I’m a monster, deficient without a soul. But at least I recognize love when it comes knockin’, and I’m not so much of a coward as to run from it. What’s your excuse?”

He paused, waiting for an answer. When none was forthcoming he continued,

“ You’re never gonna be happy, Love – not as long as you keep running from yourself. Darkness is part of what you are. Accept it. Deal with it. Then maybe you can move on and stop lying to yourself for a change.”

She said nothing, just stared at him – completely stunned. It was obvious she wasn’t prepared to deal with any of this yet. Spike sighed and ground out his smoke. He suddenly felt utterly fed up with the whole buggered affair. She didn’t wanna deal? Fine. He’d had enough.

“ Let me know when you do. Until then I have better things to do with my time.”

He had a gratifying moment of triumph before he walked away from her.

*Guess I’m not Love’s bitch after all.*

He thought with a smirk.

But it was only a moment, and it was gone all too soon.



**A/N ~ Awww, c'mon now - you didn't think it was gonna be that easy did ya? I know you wanna kill me, but it's gonna be so worth it in the end, I promise. Stay tuned true believers... Next Chapter by Wednesday... xoxoxox Rosie **
Chapter Sixteen ~ Tainted Love by Soul of the Rose
So I was having a wretched day yesterday and then I go look at my reviews. You guys sure know how to give a gal a happy :D Cheered me right up. So this is for you with great big loves *smooch*...



Chapter Sixteen ~ Tainted Love

“ Sometimes I feel I’ve got to run away, I’ve got to get away –
From the pain you drive into the heart of me.
The love we share seems to go nowhere.
And I’ve lost my light – I toss and turn, I can’t sleep at night.
Once I ran to you, now I run from you –
This tainted love you’re giving – I give you all a boy could give you,
Take my tears and that’s not nearly all – tainted love.
Don’t touch me please; I cannot stand the way you tease…
Oh, tainted love…”

~ Soft Cell


Spike managed to make it out of her eye line before the tears started. The frustration, the tension, the months of unrequited adoration built up until they broke him. He stumbled home in a daze, not quite believing what had happened. How had he gone from being on the verge of making love with her to breaking it off before it ever got started? In the gloom of his crypt he nursed a bottle of Jack and let them fall where they may. He intended to spend the next week inside a bottle, possibly longer.

Oblivion was the only thing that’d keep him from staking himself right now. He’d just lost the one thing he still cared about – the only thing that was keeping him going. And if he was honest with himself, he loved her more than he had ever loved anyone or anything ever - in life or unlife.

Just why he couldn’t say. There was simply something about the girl. There always had been. He’d come to town to kill her, but her light – oh, her light. It was so very bright. It blinded him and drew him in until it was too late. Now he was a burning carcass falling to his doom. Never realizing she was a blazing candle and not the moon…

*Now I’m waxing poetic about sodding moths.*

“Ya sad bastard.”

He toasted himself with the bottle of Jack in his lap, taking a deep draught. No wonder Angel was such a great brooding pillock. She did have that effect, didn’t she? But Angel had left her, had willingly left her. He deserved what he got. Though… what was it that he just did? Didn’t he just walk out on her as well?

“ Oh, Bloody Hell!”

He laid his head in his hands. What in buggering fuck just happened? How did it…? Why?

“ Sweet fucking Christ. What a miserable cunt I turned out to be.”

He could have laughed at this ugly little quirk of fate. Things had gone completely arse over tit in a matter of moments. Somehow, in the midst of everything – he had managed to turn into fucking Angel…

He ground his palms into his eyes and prayed;

“Please God, Stake me now…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy stood there for a full minute, completely stunned. Her jaw practically unhinged itself it was hanging so far open.

*What just happened?*

Did Spike just leave her? Did he really walk away from her? Wait a minute…

*Did Spike just tell me to get my shit together?*

What alternative Universe was she in anyway? Was this Bizarro World where up was down and black was white and… Buffy felt dizzy. She bent over gulping huge lungfulls of air. Her thighs were twitching from all the unreleased energy and her body felt electrified. What had he done to her?

*Oh, you mean aside from almost giving you the best orgasm of your life?*

Bad Buffy Brain was back, and in a foul temper apparently. But she hadn’t done anything wrong!
*(Other than kissing him in the first place, and we’re just glossing right over that, right?) * She’d told him no. She stopped the badness. She stayed true to Riley, her boyfriend.

*(Mostly)*

So then why did her brain go into attack mode? And why did she feel just exactly like shit right now? She did the right thing. And if Spike walked away that was for the good. He should know it’s over, and nothing like that could ever, ever happen again. And if that meant that she never saw him again, that was for the best.

“Yes, definitely.”

She nodded to herself – assuring, agreeing. She was right. This was the end, it was better this way, really.

So much better, in fact – that she began to cry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eros had had enough. This girl, this Slayer was the most obstinate creature he’d encountered in a good century. What could possibly be the problem? Here was Love, in it’s truest earthly form presented on a silver platter. What more did she want?! Yet still she ran, even in the face of her obviously overwhelming desire for the boy - though she cried even now at his loss. And they had been so close to consummating their love! It was a gorgeous and extremely arousing display. He’d rarely seen such unfettered passion among mortals – or immortals for that matter. For a moment there, he actually thought his work here was finished.

He sighed, deeply aggravated and ran a hand roughly through his wavy hair, sending the golden strands into chaotic disarray. It was definitely time to bring in the big guns…

“ Don’t do that, Darling. It makes you look like one of those ragamuffin surf-bums.”

Eros whirled, heart in his throat. Before him stood the glowing Goddess of Love herself. At nearly 3,000 she didn’t look a day over 30. Her long, fair hair cascaded down her shoulders, tiny flower blossoms weaved in among the strands and her ivory skin seemed to be alight with it’s own glow. As always he was completely awestruck by her beauty.

“ Mother! You startled me, I was just about to call on you.”

Aphrodite smiled indulgently at her wayward child, her rosebud mouth curling at the corner.

“ Yes My Dove, I know. I felt your frustration all the way in the other realm.”

He smiled back sheepishly.

“ That bad, eh?”

She patted his arm affectionately and winked.

“ A mother always knows, Poppet.”

He smiled at the radiant goddess and embraced her warmly. Her soft pink robes smelled like heavenly roses and fresh honeysuckle. He was instantly calmed by her presence, and sighed with contentment.

“ Over two thousand years old and I still find I need you.”

He laughed ruefully and shook his head.

“ Heavens forefend you should ever stop, Cherub.”

She cupped his face with her lily-white hand fondly. Smoothing his silky hair back into place she looked at him with eyes the exact color of the Aegean Sea.

“ Now what’s all this nonsense about the Slayer?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy made her way home in tears. She thought she’d cried it all out of her system on the walk back to her house, but she found them creeping up on her repeatedly. In the kitchen getting dinner, in the shower washing her hair and now brushing her teeth. It was getting ridiculous. She was just glad Mom and Dawn weren’t up to question her about it.
The last thing she wanted to do was talk about this right now.

She finished brushing and swiped angrily at her eyes with a tissue. She felt absolutely wretched. She had a headache from crying, her stomach was in knots, and to make things just that much more ultra-fun: she was irrationally horny. You’d think all the crying and misery would be enough to nip that right in the bud.

*And what is a bud exactly anyway?*

She thought nonsensically. But nooooo. Her body seemed to care less what was going on in her head. It only knew that it had been rudely interrupted, and it wasn’t finished yet. She’d found her hands lingering in naughty places all on their own during her shower. She’d felt too upset to do anything about it then. But now, as she lay down to sleep – feeling like she’d just downed a double-shot of espresso – she thought she might actually have to do something about it now. Or face yet another sleepless night.

Buffy sighed irritably and flipped over, fluffing her pillow with unnecessary force. She thought about calling Riley for a second, but an immediate flash of guilt cancelled out that idea. Not to mention that he might not (ahem) get the job done. She shoved her face into her pillow wanting to scream.

Why, oh why, did Spike have to be so good at that? I mean she had her suspicions before, but now – now she KNEW. And it was one thing to suspect and a whole ‘nother thing to know, ya know?

*Oh Yeah. Definitely.*

‘Cause now she knew how his voice got low and rough when he was aroused, and that his eyes turned so dark they seemed black. Now she knew what his mouth felt like on her skin. How his tongue felt as it teased her neck, licked her nipples and sank itself deep inside her. She felt herself getting wet just from the memory of it. His tongue was so cool on her hottest place. She longed for him to make her come that way, to feel his whole mouth on her, devouring her.

*Bad brain!*

She scolded. But Bad Buffy Brain didn’t seem to care. It had places to go, things to do – and they all involved Spike.

*Just call me Amtrak.*

She thought wryly. Oh, God – Riley! How was she ever going to face him again? After everything that happened tonight. After all she did with Spike. Jesus, she still couldn’t believe it herself. Tonight, IN REALITY, she’d practically fucked Spike in a cemetery. She groaned into her pillow. Shady Glen was just never going to be the same...

The bad part was that it was good. Scratch that, it was incredible – the best ever. Or would’ve been if she’d actually let herself come. She pulled another pillow over her head, hoping to smother somehow. What’s worse was that more than she regretted cheating on Riley right now…

*(and let’s be honest that was so cheating.)*

She regretted not finishing things with Spike. And not just for her – for both of them. Alone in her bed she could admit that – a part of her desperately wanted to see the look on his face when she made him come, wanted to give him that pleasure. The thought of that look gave her a deep, tingling twinge. And she liked the feel of his cock in her hands, she could admit that too. It was so large and cool and so very hard. It made her want to get on her knees and take it in her mouth right there, right then – and she had never felt that way before. (Not even about Angel.) Then after that she wanted to throw him on the ground and slide it inside of her. Wanted to feel it filling her up, pushing against her womb, making her come and come... Like she knew he could, like he gladly WOULD if she’d only let him. Buffy groaned into her bedding, imagining it all too vividly.

*And why aren’t we letting him again?*

Bad Buffy Brain asked innocently.

At the moment she was honestly stumped.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aphrodite listened intently to her son’s story. A tragic tale of frustrated love between a vampire and a Slayer – certainly one of the more unique tales she’d ever heard. And that was saying something. There was the time that Zeus turned himself into a swan and… her son’s voice interrupted this train of thought, fortunately.

“…So you can see my problem, Mother. Nothing seems to have worked yet. I’ve done all but shoot the both of them where it would do the most good.”

Eros frowned petulantly reminding her at once of the mischievous child he’d been not so long ago. She almost expected him to stomp his sandaled feet and howl like a banshee – a trick he’d picked up from Pan. It used to scare the Hades out of the local shepards, giving him no end of satisfaction. She smiled adoringly at him.

“ Now, now, My Lamb. Don’t work yourself into a Pan-ic.”

That drew a sideways grin from the boy.

“ I’d forgotten about that. Not that the denizens of Sunnydale would notice. Have you seen the amount of supernatural activity around here?”

He dismissed the thought and began pacing, troubled.

“ I just feel so wretchedly out of practice! I’ve done little but play lackey for the Gods and the Powers these many years. I’ve forgotten the way of things, Mother. I’ve forgotten Love.”

He placed his head in his hands, filled with regret. Aphrodite rose and put her arms around him, shushing and comforting. She raised his head from her shoulder gently and looked deeply into his clear azure eyes.

“ My Darling Boy – you have forgotten nothing. You were made from Love! You have only strayed from your path; as we all are want to do from time to time. Even we Gods.”

She wrapped her arm around him and continued their walk through the stillness of the cemetery.

“Has it never occurred to you that the Powers brought about this situation not only for these lovers, but for you as well?”

He shook his head wonderingly, and asked;

“ But why?”

*Ah, the ignorance of youth.*

She thought fondly, cupping his cheek.

“ So that you would be reminded of your calling, Eros! So you would return to your true path, inspired by Love once more.”

The boy goggled at the notion, stopping in his tracks. Revelation just dawning. A singularly beautiful smile crossed his face, lighting him up like a blaze of heavenly sunlight. Had any mortal seen it, it would have meant their doom…

A lifetime of unrequited worship at the feet of the God of Love.



**Just got word that our little fic has been nominated for "Most Origonal Storyline" and
"Best Fluff" at the Love Bite Awards! http://www.lovebite-network.info/awards/nominees.html
I send big semi-naughty snuggles to whoever nominated me... xoxoxoxoxox Rosie **
Chapter Seventeen ~ Painted on My Heart by Soul of the Rose
And now, more smut...enjoy!


Chapter Seventeen ~ Painted on My Heart

“ I’ve tried everything that I can to get my heart to forget you, but it just can’t seem to.
I guess it’s just no use – in every part of me, there’s still a part of you.
I’ve still got your face painted on my heart, drawn upon my soul,
etched upon my memory, Baby. And I got your kiss still burning on my lips,
the touch of your fingertips are still so deep inside of me, Baby.
…Something in your eyes keeps haunting me.
I’m trying to escape you, but I know there ain’t no way to chase you from my mind…”

~ The Cult


There was no sleep to be had this night. All he could think about was her. And how seriously he had cocked it all up in the space of a single evening.

*A hundred and twenty odd years and I still know sweet fuck all about women.*

Spike shook his head and drank from bottle number two for the night. The unfortunate thing was that he was seriously drunk – but not drunk enough. He was beginning to wonder if it was possible for him to EVER get drunk enough to forget Buffy – even temporarily. He had his doubts. Possibly maybe, if he made it to the black out stage. He was more than willing to give it a go.

The problem was; everything they’d done that night was burned into his brain, and no amount of alcohol seemed to erase it. Whenever he closed his eyes he was set upon by vivid flashbacks. The way she’d first kissed him, like she was starving for him. How she’d wrapped her legs around him, scorching him with her heat. How he’d tasted her breasts, her flesh, the sweet wetness of her quim. Her hot little hands wrapped around his cock. Spike banged his head against the back of the battered easy chair, wishing for something harder – like cement maybe.

*All too soon, Mate –You’ll find yourself on the floor and have your wish.*

He tipped the bottle back for a deep draught. Not soon enough though. One after another – scenes of the night replayed in his head over and over and over - in screamingly torturous detail. Fuck, he could practically taste her right now.

*Sweet as a sun-ripe peach she was... *

He growled in frustration, grinding his fists into his eyes. But this only assisted him with picturing her naked breasts and the damp chestnut curls of her sex. His erection throbbed painfully.

“ And YOU!” he addressed it, eyeing it menacingly. “I’ve had it up to here with you. Look wha’ kinda trouble you get me into! Can’ think prop’ly when you’re around, y’ bastard.”

His penis paid him no mind, bobbing along jauntily – hard as ever. He took a series of long pulls from the bottle of Jim Beam then set it back in his lap, carefully avoiding his unbearably stiff prick. He scowled at it with disapproval.

“ Why don’t ya just slag off, ya waster!”

*Damn vampire constitution.*

Normally the alcohol would have done it in by now, at least softened it up a little. But not tonight. Christ, he could cut diamonds with the thing! He was damn sick of looking at it, to tell the truth. Not to mention how bleedin’ uncomfortable it was. Only one thing for it then.

“ Right.”

Probably shoulda done it hours ago. Spike stood up unsteadily, bottle in hand. Then carefully made his way down to the lower level of his crypt.

Time for a good long wank.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy tossed and turned for the next hour, her mind filled with images of Spike. What they’d done together, what they could do – what she WANTED to do. Something about him made her feel free, like she could ask for anything – do anything and it was all good. She could be anything she wanted to be in his presence. She’d already done things with him that very night that were WAY outside her realm of experience.

Buffy – made out like the world was ending in a graveyard with a vamp. She’d gotten pretty much naked in a public place and let him lick her and touch her and taste her – everywhere. And she didn’t give a damn. She didn’t care about anything in that moment but him, and how they made each other feel. It was as if the entire world ceased to exist outside the little erotic lust-bubble they occupied. And that was a dangerous thing – he was dangerous. Why was that so damn exciting?

Why did she get wet just thinking about him? It was so frustrating! He was the wrong guy! Couldn’t her body see that? Couldn’t her mind tell the difference between good guy and bad guy? She had a vivid flash of Spike on his knees in front of her. It made her shiver all over.

*Apparently not.*

This was torturous. Why couldn’t it be Riley she felt this way about? He was a good guy.
Although, in all their many patrols he had never tried to do anything more than kiss her.
Not once. Riley liked his Love American-style – at home in bed, in the missionary position with the lights safely off. Buffy yawned unconsciously. Okay, so he wasn’t the most exciting guy in the world. But the sex was pretty good. Or at least she thought so until Spike came along…

“Errrg!”

She growled into the quiet night. Why did he have to come along anyway? Why didn’t she just stake his ass years ago? Then she’d be a happy little camper. Miss Normal 2000 with her college sweetie.

*Yeah, good. Cause ignorance is bliss right?*

Bad Buffy Brain snarked sarcastically. She was really beginning to resent this little rebellion her mind seemed to be having.

“ I can always have you lobotomized you know.”

*Great, now I’m talking to my own brain. What’s next? Wearing my underwear outside my clothes?*

She flipped on to her belly moodily and promptly buried her head under her pillow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike stood in the cement shower stall of his crypt, cock in hand for what had to be the third time that day. He let the hot water beat down on him as his mind filled with images of Buffy. Only this time he didn’t have to make them up, he didn’t have to try to imagine what her body looked like. He had the real thing emblazoned on his brain. This was both a blessing and a curse. A blessing in that it made the wanking all the better, his mind could now provide him with a Technicolor, 3-D fantasy Buffy in vivid Scent-O-Rama. But a curse because he knew he would never forget it, never forget HER – not ever. Probably not even after he was long dust and a permanent resident of Hell.

“Fuck ME ...”

He spluttered, realizing he would never be rid of her. That might have been said with more irony if he’d registered the fact that was exactly what he was about to do. But you’ll have to forgive him, he is quite horribly drunk...

He braced himself against the wall of his shower with one hand, preparing to go to town. There was no help for his mind; she already had a permanent hold of it. But he could do something for his body at least. The pathetic bit was that there was only one thing that would get him off right now – Buffy. Spike sighed and leaned his whiskey-heavy head against his outstretched arm.

*I surrender.*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy flounced over on to her side irritably. Why did things have to be so complicated? She absolutely did NOT want to be having these feelings for him. For SPIKE, of all people! But God, the things he did! The way he touched her. No one had ever made her feel that way before, like she was lit up from the inside. She felt so…good …when she was around him lately.
All alive and juicy and desirable.

Riley never made her feel like that… No one did. Just Spike. And if she were really honest about it – he always kinda had. He’d gotten her going since the first night she met him. The way he talked to her, his cock-sure swagger. He’d sauntered into town like he owned the place and told her straight to her face he planned on killing her. It’d been one long bout of foreplay ever since. Only it took her till just now to realize it.

*It’s not like you never fantasized about him before.*

This was true, she admitted reluctantly. Sometimes, in bed with Riley – thinking about fighting Spike was the only thing that could get her off. And lately…well, lately she wasn’t just thinking about fighting him now was she? Her skin felt very warm suddenly. When she looked at it that way, thinking all the way back to the beginning – Buffy could see that this had been building for a while. Years even.

*Damn.*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike stroked steadily, eyes closed – remembering… The musky tang of her sex pressed up against his nose as his tongue was buried inside her… The searing heat of her hands wrapped around his cock, pumping it hard – squeezing it tight right at the head. Bloody perfect. He groaned her name huskily;

“Buffy…God, Buffy…”

Then his mind turned to everything he’d wanted to do to her – what he would have done this very night…if only. He would lay her out naked on his bed – licking, sucking and savouring every inch of her golden body. He would spread her legs and spend an hour between her thighs, exploring every satiny fold of her succulent quim. Making her come over and over until she couldn’t take it a moment longer.

“ Mmm – yeah…”

And then - what she would do to him. She would kneel before him and take his full length in her mouth. Sucking it from the base to the head, then swirling her tongue around the tip as she pulled it from between her shiny candy-apple lips. He knew she would do him right – do him so very well.

“Ah, Love…yeah…”

And finally, what he wanted most – to spread her thighs wide for him and slide his cock right where it longed to be; buried to the hilt within her. Spike remembered the way her tight little pussy had clenched his fingers – so fiery hot and slick with her juices. It didn’t take much to imagine it sheathed around him now. He knew exactly how it would be, slamming home inside her, feeling her muscles starting to contract as her orgasm built. Knowing it was him bringing her this pleasure. Only him.


A moment: the look in her eyes when he slid another finger inside, watching her pupils dilate at the sensation.

His mouth full of the taste of her; richer and sweeter than even blood.

Her voice telling him; “ Yeah, Spike…so good. Close…close now…”


“Christ, Buffy – Fuuuuck!”

He roared out his climax, knowing there was no one around to hear it. Thick milky rivulets hit the back wall of the shower and flowed away with the water.

“ Oh…fuck…yeah…”

He rasped, starting to come down now. He was still braced against the wall with one arm, and he leaned into it gasping. God, that was good. Best wank ever – and no wonder. Anymore UST and a bloke could explode. Plus he had all that really choice fantasy material now.

*Yeah. Too bad that’s all it’ll ever be, eh?*

He pushed the thought from his mind. He didn’t want to think about that now. Just wanted to finish his shower and seek the solace of his bed and the oblivion of sleep.

He prayed he wouldn’t dream tonight. And if he did – that he wouldn’t remember.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy lay there for a moment, stunned. She tried to let this information sink in. Just how long had this been going on exactly? Had they been attracted to each other from the beginning? Just dancing around this issue the whole time?

* “ You think we’re dancing?”
“ It’s all we’ve ever done.” *

His words came back to her.

“No.”

But it was said quietly and without conviction. She flipped through her mental catalogue of memories – scenes flashing in her mind. The night she first met him. Their first fight at the school. Spike at her house – making a deal with the devil to stop Acathala. Willow’s wedding spell.

*Oh God.*

They’d kissed and groped and made out like they were extras in “ The Real Cancun”. And when the spell had ended, it wasn’t the horror of kissing Spike that made her pull away; it was the knowledge that she didn’t want to stop. How quickly she had stamped that down, burying it in the deepest part of her subconscious.

*Well so much for THAT, huh?*

Swaggery Spike. Snarkey Spike. Ultra-Violent Spike. They were all there in her memories, soon to be followed by: Helpless Spike. Romantic Spike. And always and forever;
Mouthy Spike.

*Don’t forget Sexy Spike and Oh-My-God-Take-Me-Now Spike.*

Bad Buffy Brain piped up. Okay, fine – them too. And a few months ago, when Riley was sick – Bad Ass Spike showed up for a minute, doing his level best to get that chip out of his head. And wasn’t that exhilarating though? Seeing the old Spike for just a moment? God, she’d been pissed at him. Her sense of betrayal was so great…

*Why was that again?*

It’s not like he didn’t act exactly according to character.

*True.*

She just never expected him to hurt her like that. He went behind her back; he lied to her and double-crossed her when he was supposed to be helping her – and in cahoots with Harmony, no less.

*And which one of those things hurt more?*

Oh, but the fight – too sweet and over too soon. When he’d leapt at her, the shock of his body on top of hers. And the sense memory that took over when she knew the bite was coming. She shivered involuntarily. When Angel bit her it gave her the best orgasm of her life.

*Second Best.*

Her mind corrected. Yes, now second to the dream she’d had the other night.

*Would be third best if only…*

Buffy pushed that thought away quickly. So if Spike had bitten her… she gulped. It woulda been one HELLUVA way to go out. And she knew he hadn’t been unaware of that – of what a vampire bite could do…sexually. When he was on top of her then, she’d felt his erection grinding into her as he went for the kill. The arousal she’d felt had been so sharp and immediate that it threw her off her guard, stunning her for a moment. And that wasn’t the first time was it? How many times had she fought or argued with him and noticed his hard-on threatening to pop out the buttons on his 501’s?

*God, did the man ever wear underwear?*

Probably Dozens. Though she’d dismissed it or consciously chosen to ignore it.

*Damn, Buffy – repressed much?*

So it wasn’t just her.

It was BOTH of them.

Wanting each other.

All this time…

“Fuck.”


Baby, ain't I good to you? Looky - TWO chapters (count 'em) by Wednesday. Hope you enjoyed reading that as much as I enjoyed writing it (heh.)*pictures wet,naked Spike* :D I'll try to get another update in before the long weekend (which I will be out of town for.) 'Cause I know y'all can't wait 6 whole days for another chapter...
Chapter Eighteen ~ Witchcraft by Soul of the Rose
** Thanks for the amazing reviews, guys! I'm all a-glow... I*heart* our fandom :D Special thanks to Peta/Megan for the recommendation to BSV and the inspiration to add some bitey goodness to this story (look for it later, o impatient ones). Hope everyone has a stellar Independance day, I'll be thinking of you while I'm lounging idly on the beach...Though how I'll make it for 6 whole days with no Spuffy I have no idea...**



Chapter Eighteen ~ Witchcraft

“ Those fingers in my hair, that sly, come hither stare –
strips my conscious bare – it’s witchcraft.
And I’ve got no defense for it.
That heat is too intense for it.
What good would common sense for it do?
It’s witchcraft. Plain old wicked witchcraft.
And although I know it’s strictly taboo.
When you arouse the need in me, my heart says ‘yes, indeed’ in me –
Proceed with what you’re leading me too.
It’s such an ancient pitch, but one I’d never switch –
Cause there ain’t no nicer witch than you.”

~ Frank Sinatra


Buffy’s mind hurt from so much circular thinking. Even Bad Buffy Brain had been stunned into silence. Her head ached, her eyes burned and her stomach was a tangle of anxiety. There was nothing left for her to do but sleep it off, and hope the morning light would bring some clarity.

She reached over and flicked on her small bedside lamp. Digging in her nightstand she found the small bottle of Tylenol PM and gratefully downed 2 tablets with a gulp of bottled water. Hopefully now she could get a decent night’s rest.

Things always look better in the morning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Goddess of Love stood at the foot of Buffy’s bed in all her enchanted glory. Her son stood by, watching her with awe as she worked her magic on the fabric of reality itself.

*Sometimes it just pays to bring in an outside contractor.*

He thought with amusement. After all these years he was still learning from her. It’d barely taken her an hour to come up with a devastating new plan of action. Aphrodite had taken the time to sit with the girl and tap into her desires, conscious and unconscious. Very quickly she’d hit upon the snag that was keeping the lovers apart.

“ She believes she wants a so-called ‘normal life’.”

She announced materializing on the roof of the Summer’s house alongside Eros. She smoothed her silken robes and patted her flowing hair back into perfect order. …As if she needed it.

“ I was able to confirm with the Akashik Records. The girl thinks of her Slayerhood as a burden. She was never trained properly, you see. She should have been raised with the knowledge of what she was, but she slipped under the radar of the Watcher’s Council somehow. She didn’t find out until the age of 16! It came as quite a shock as you can imagine.”

Eros nodded sympathetically, trying to envision such a destiny suddenly thrust upon an unsuspecting teenage girl.

“Her Watcher must have had his work cut out for him.”

“ Oh yes, indeed. The upshot of all this is that she wants back the life she had, thinking it will bring her happiness. That is why she refuses her vampire suitor and clings to a mortal lover.”

“ She has another lover?” He asked, shocked.

“ Didn’t you do any sort of research? Impetuous child… No matter, you may have overlooked him anyway. She has little connection with him beyond her fantasy of a quote ‘normal boyfriend’. And you should have seen that girl’s heart – such a mess! No wonder the poor dear is confused. She’s so thoroughly committed to this misguided ideal that she’s throwing away a chance at real happiness.”

She shook her head sympathetically, a frown upon her rosy lips.

“ And on a side note, our vampire is non-other than the infamous William the Bloody. Which isn’t helping matters one little bit. However much he tries to change, she doesn’t trust him, always believing he has ulterior motives.”

She stood up and began pacing the length of the roof, her flaxen curls glowing platinum in the moonlight. She turned to him, her perfect brows drawn together in thought.

“ This is serious business, Eros. Destiny is at work here – their souls and karma are deeply intertwined. The Powers want them together. They need each other you see, without their Love for each other they are lost.”

“ I had no idea what I was getting into, did I?”

Aphrodite smiled indulgently at her errant child.

“ You never do, Cherub.”

“ What will happen if we fail?”

“ We must not. It is Buffy’s Love that drives Spike towards positive change. At her side he will become a great warrior and serve the White, ultimately redeeming his own soul. And it is Spike’s Love that will make Buffy’s life worth living, it will give her something to cherish and fight for, it will make her the strongest Slayer in all the line.”

“ My Goddess…” Eros exclaimed in awe. And he had thought this a simple Love Match. Aphrodite nodded at him and then continued;

“ But without Buffy, Spike will fall back into his old ways - and at best drink himself into a stupor until he is foolishly killed – and at worst he could give even Angelus a run for his money.”

Eros hissed in shock.

“ It cannot be so – have you not seen his heartfire? It blazes like the sun, it is what called me here!”

Aphrodite rubbed his arm soothingly and said gently;

“ But it is just that tender heart that makes him vulnerable. It’s what drew him to an unlife in the first place.” She frowned thoughtfully, turning away from him to continue her pacing.
“ And as for Buffy, she would remain a strong, capable Slayer – but with an unfilled heart and an empty life. It would be her undoing. She won’t last long without the boy.”

“What must we do?”

“ I’ve come up with a plan, Poppet. You’ve heard the expression ‘Careful what
you wish for?’ …”

He raised an inquisitive eyebrow at her.

“Yes?”

“ The Slayer desires ‘normal’?” Aphrodite’s blue eyes twinkled wickedly.

“Then normal she shall have…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The morning light stirred her from a deep and restful sleep. She turned over into her pillow displacing the heavy masculine arm that was draped over her protectively. That felt sooo nice, she snuggled happily into the bare chest in front of her.

*Mmmm, Spike…*

Her sleep-fuddled brain manufactured. She sighed with contentment. All was right with the world.

*Wait.*

She peeled open one eye carefully.

*Spike?*

Not Spike. Large + Warm = Riley.

*Oh.*

She tried not to feel too disappointed, and looked up to see him smiling sleepily at her.

“ Good morning, Beautiful.”

She smiled back at him, warming slightly to his sudden appearance.

“ Morning. When did you get here? I didn’t even hear you come in.”

*Must have been the Tylenol PM. Wow, that’s some good stuff.*

“ What are you talking about, Buffy? I was here when we went to bed. Together.”

“ Oh.”

Buffy was feeling very perplexed at the moment. She pulled back the blankets and struggled into an upright position. That’s when she noticed she wasn’t in her own bedroom anymore…

*What the hell?*

She scanned the room quickly, relieved to find she was somewhere familiar at least.

“ Are you okay, Sweetie?”

Riley asked over his shoulder as he slipped out of bed and began rummaging around in the drawers of his dresser. He found a pair of green sweats and slipped them on over his boxers, along with a simple gray athletic shirt.

“ Yeah, I just thought…”

“ Good.” He said brightly, not noticing he was cutting her off. “ ‘Cause we don’t want to be late for class.”

“ Oh. Okay.”

She got out of bed and began picking her clothes up off the floor.

“ I’m gonna grab a quick shower then. Meet you at lunch?”

He smiled cheerfully at her and grabbed his towel off the hook on the closet door.

“ Yeah. Sounds good.”

Buffy finished dressing quickly – in clothes she didn’t remember wearing last night.

*Cute though.*

At least she could count on her own taste. Riley opened the door, then turned around and came back to her.

“ I can’t believe I almost forgot – ”

He scooped her up into his arms and kissed her soundly, leaving her breathless.

“ I never want to leave you without doing that.” He said putting her feet gently back on the ground, smiling sweetly. “ I always want you to know how much I love you.”

Her heart melted just a little.

“ How could I not? ”

She said, touched. He grinned boyishly at her and shouldered his towel.

“ I can’t wait for this summer, Buffy.”

“ Me either.”

She replied, trying not to sound as puzzled as she felt. She smiled brightly at him as he walked towards the door.

“ And, Honey – don’t forget your ring on the night stand again. I just hate to see you without it.”

He winked then turned down the hall, seeking his morning shower.

*What the hell is going on? Why do I have no idea what he’s talking about?*

Curiosity piqued, Buffy walked over to the oak night table on her side of the bed.

There glittering brightly in the early morning sunlight was a gorgeous diamond solitaire.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Holy Crap.*

Buffy could not have been more shocked. This was hers? When did that happen?

“ Okay. Something seriously screwy is going on.”

She pocketed the ring and headed over to the dorms, hoping to catch Willow before class.

Ten minutes later she was knocking on the door to Tara and Willow’s room, anxiously going over the morning’s events in her mind. Tara answered the door smiling kindly at Buffy.

“ Hi Tara – I was just looking for Willow. I had something I needed to talk to her about before class.”

She looked politely puzzled.

“ I’m sorry, she isn’t here Buffy. She didn’t come by this morning.”

“ Come by?”

Buffy’s brow wrinkled with confusion.

“ No. I wasn’t expecting to see her till lunch.”

Buffy was crestfallen. She worried at her lower lip, thinking.

“ Oh. Okay. Well, do you know where I might find her?”

Tara looked even more perplexed.

“ Um, your room maybe?”

“ My room?”

*You mean the one I moved out of two months ago…*

“ Are you okay, Buffy?”

She looked genuinely concerned.

*Uh oh, better cover.*

Buffy plastered on a smile and tried to pass it off as a blonde moment.

“ I’m sorry - I spent the night at Riley’s and I didn’t get much sleep…” Tara pinked slightly at this admission. “ I mean I didn’t sleep well. I guess I just assumed she would be with you.”

Tara beamed brightly at her, feeling complimented.

“ That’s okay. It’s nice that you would assume that – I guess that makes us an official couple then.”

Buffy smiled with false cheer, her brain on overload.

“ Yeah. Absolutely it does. I guess I’ll just run over to our room, and then I think it’s time for some serious coffee.”

The other girl smiled sweetly back at her.

“ Okay, I’ll see you guys at lunch then.”

“ Great. Bye.”

“ Bye, Buffy.”

Tara closed the door gently on a very confused Slayer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy dashed over to Stevenson Hall as quickly as she could, her mind a whirl of confusion. Was she dreaming? But everything seemed so real. Then maybe last night was the dream – that somehow seemed more likely… Her and Spike, making out? Half naked in the graveyard? That couldn’t be REAL, right? But then why was it so easy to remember the feel of his mouth on hers? Or the touch of his hands, cool and commanding on her body? Buffy felt fractures beginning to develop in her sanity…

*I need to talk to Willow, NOW.*

She knocked lightly on the door to her room, praying feverishly.

*Please, PLEASE be here…*

Willow answered the door, looking surprised to find Buffy on the other side.

*Thank God!*

“ Buffy? Why’d you knock?”

“ Um, I forgot my key? I’m having a really weird morning, Wil.”

Willow’s face was all concern as she looked at her friend. Buffy was obviously very upset.

“ What’s going on? Is everything okay?”

Buffy walked into the room she’d moved out of two months ago to find her belongings magically returned, just as if she’d never left. Somehow she didn’t think dorm gnomes were responsible. She looked around nervously, chewing her thumbnail.

“ Yeah, I guess – I don’t know. Do you have time to talk now? I kinda need you.”

Willow sat down on her own bed across from her, brow furrowed with alarm.

“ I’ll make time. You look really freaked, Buffy. What’s up? ”

Buffy sat down heavily on her bed, worrying at her nail anxiously.

“ Could you um, tell me about my life? ‘Cause I seem to have completely forgotten it.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“ What? What’s going on? What do you mean…”

“ I mean I woke up at Riley’s this morning. But I went to bed at MY house. I have an engagement ring I don’t ever remember getting. I thought I moved back home two months ago…And I won’t even begin to describe the events of the last couple of days to you – ‘cause you wouldn’t believe me. Hell, I don’t even believe me.”

Willow looked dumbfounded. But she immediately rallied like a trooper for a possible explanation.

“ Do you think it’s some kind of spell? …Or maybe you’re just working too hard lately?”

Buffy shrugged and threw up her hands in exasperation.

“ I dunno, Wil. But my memories of how things were, like pre-dawn today – are as vivid and real as sitting here with you right now. I don’t know WHAT to think! Could a spell do all this?”

“ Mess with your mind? Oh heck yeah. Magic can make you believe anything – at least for a little while. And you should know, right? Cause of my whole wacky ‘do my will’ spell. Making you think you were in love with Spike…”

Willow flicked her wrist in a dismissive gesture, chuckling.

“ Yeah, ridiculous…”

Buffy laughed weakly, a series of images flashing through her mind from last night – all extremely graphic and painfully real.

*If you only knew…*

“ It might be nothing, Buffy – I mean why would anybody wanna do this to you anyway?
It doesn’t make any sense.”

“ Maybe just to mess with the Slayer? I dunno…”

Willow looked confused.

“ But how would this affect Faith?”

It was Buffy’s turn to look confused.

“ Huh?!”

Willow’s voice was puzzled.

“ How would you being all wonky in the head affect the Slayer?”

Buffy’s eyebrows met her hairline as she made a sudden mental connection.

“ Faith’s THE SLAYER?!”



*** Mwahahahahaha - can you believe I left it there? I'm so evil. *grins* But I promise a nice, juicy udate as soon as I get back (by Tuesday). Meanwhile, if you're feeling bored over the weekend allow me to shamelessly plug my other story " Learning Curve" (which you can find here). It's a short bit of smutty Spuffy fun. I also recommend " And Here We Go Round Again" by Peta, " Just a Little Spell" by Patti, " One Perfect Night" by Spikeslovebite, "Roomies" by Brat and if you haven't read Lizrrrbeathan yet - ya really oughta - http://www.lizerrrbeathan.com/LizerrrbeathanFanfic.html " Life After Wartime" will make you laugh AND cry, it's just wonderful. There, that should get you through the weekend. And if I didn't list your story, please don't be offended, these are the ones I'm reading currently. It doesn't mean I don't love ya fer chrissakes! Snuggles to all, Rosie xoxoxox***
Chapter Nineteen ~ Where Are You Now? by Soul of the Rose
**Thanks for all the great reviews while I was gone. It's nice to be missed :) Hope you guys enjoy the new chappie...**


Chapter Nineteen ~ Where Are You Now ?

“ Are you in another place?
Or behind another face?
Where are you now?
Are you just a mental case?
Or did you just slip in to an empty space?
Where are you now? ”

~ Brandy



Buffy’s jaw hung slackly open for a full minute, prompting Willow to lean over and gently close it.

“ I take it that’s one of those things you don’t remember.”

Buffy got up, pacing anxiously.

“ Uh, yeah. This can’t be a good thing, Wil. I don’t understand anything that’s going on… Not a year ago Faith stole my body, tried to steal my life not to mention fucking my boyfriend! And now she’s the Slayer! And what exactly does that make ME?!”

Her voice rose to a hysterical pitch.

“ Um while I don’t feel at all qualified to address that first part, I can tell you what it makes you…”

“ In the middle of a psychotic break?”

“Uh, no – not exactly.”

“ On gianormous amounts of LSD?”

Willow rolled her eyes good-naturedly.

“ No, Silly - it makes you retired.”

Buffy thunked down heavily on her bed.

“ What?!”

Willow moved next to her and put a comforting arm around her shoulders.

“ Oh, Sweetie – I don’t know what’s going on, but I promise you we’ll figure this out.”

Buffy patted her arm gratefully and then rose from the bed again, pacing.

“ Just tell me how – when?”

Willow looked thoughtful.

“ Well, you started planning it senior year. I remember there was lots of discussion about everything. I mean it was such a big deal for there to be two of you in the first place. When you got your SAT scores back, they were so good – and then you got accepted to Northwestern. Your mom lobbied really hard of course, and Giles always wants the best for you…”

Buffy nodded absentmindedly remembering how excited her mom had been about her high SAT scores. She turned to Willow raising an enquiring eyebrow.

“ And Faith?”

She shrugged offhandedly.

“ She said she didn’t mind, ‘cause she loved the job and you didn’t – and she was never gonna go to college. She figured being a Slayer was all she was good for. She was super sweet about the whole thing actually.”

Buffy crossed her arms, looking deeply skeptical.

“ Really.”

“ Yeah. I kinda think she was happy to be the only Slayer. She really stepped up to the plate – started training really hard with Giles and - ”

“ Giles is her WATCHER?!”

Her mouth fell open in horror.

“ Well yeah, it only made sense – he had so much experience already. And that Wesley guy couldn’t really handle her. He kinda pooped out after we raided the mayor’s office and Faith…hey, do you remember that at all?”

She studied Buffy intently.

“ I remember the mayor’s ascension thingy – big snake and explodey-demon bits all over the place…”

Her friend cut her off;

“ Oh. Well, that never actually happened …” Willow’s brows drew together in a contemplative frown. “At least not here…”

She rested her head in her hand, lost in thought.

“ What? What are you thinking?”

Her frowned deepened.

“ I don’t know…it sounds impossible, even for here…but then again…”

Buffy was deeply unnerved.

“ What Willow?!?”

“ It’s just …I’ve been reading something lately.” She crossed the room to her bed and began shuffling in the drawer of her nightstand. Turning to Buffy she handed her a book. The title didn’t register mentally at all ; "Alternate Worlds; Theories in Quantum Physics ”.

“ Is this for your physics class?”

Willow shrugged and gave her a little half-smile.

“ Just a little light bedtime reading.”

“Whoa.”

Buffy was seriously impressed.

“Hey, a girl’s gotta have her hobbies.” She smiled enigmatically before going on. “ Anyway – this book is all about how there are alternate Universes that exist right beside our own. Some so close that they’re almost like a mirror to ours – others so far that we would hardly recognize them.”

Buffy’s brain strained to absorb this new information.

“ So there’s not just other dimensions, there are alternate UNIVERSES now?”

“ Yup. Apparently reality is a pretty complex place.” She nodded. “ The thing is these AU’s - that’s what the book calls ‘em – aren’t separated by much. According to the author decisions we make can send us into a different place. But this is the weird part – there aren’t just alternate Universes, Buffy. There’s alternate US - es.”

Buffy just goggled at the implications.

“ Yeah, I know. It kinda gave me the heebies at first too. Remember Vampire Willow? Yech.” She shuddered. “ This guy says that on some level, our souls live out every choice we make. Like it’s part of our spiritual growth process. All our major life choices create our path, and with every big life choice our path splits – and a part of us goes one way, and another part goes the other way. He says you can create Heaven or Hell on earth depending on your own choices. Makes it pretty important to stay conscientious huh?”

Buffy frowned.

“ So what are you thinking, Wil?”

“ I’m thinking – and I realize how wacko this sounds – but Hellmouth right?”

“ Riiight…”

She encouraged.

“ I’m thinking you’re in an alternate Universe. The things you said, about not remembering getting engaged – and I mean you would NEVER forget that! And about Faith being bad, and the mayor’s ascension. It just rang a bell for me and I thought maybe, just maybe it could be possible.”

They stood in astonished silence together, letting the implications of this sink in.

“ Buffy – maybe you’re getting a chance to live out a different choice. That seems like the only way you would remember things being different. ‘Cause according to the book we turn corners into different Universes every day without ever being aware of it.”

Buffy sat down next to Willow on the bed, stunned.

“ I don’t even know what to say…”

“ I know. Mind-blowing right? Just wait until you get into String Theory. I’ll lend you ‘The Elegant Universe’ – it’ll fry your synapses.”

“ No thanks, my brain already hurts as it is.”

Willow patted the top of her friend’s head gently.

“ Aw, poor Buffy’s Brain.”

She smiled at the silly gesture and then asked;

“ Could this really be possible, Wil?”

“ Well, Buff – look where we are. I think just about anything is possible.”

She made a wide arm sweep to indicate Sunnydale, the Hellmouth and Everything…

Buffy shook her head, trying to make the jumble inside make sense.

Alternate Universes… engagement… retirement…

*Wow.*


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Eros stood awestruck, observing the wonderment Aphrodite had performed.

“ Mother, what have you done?”

She clapped her hands, delighted with her triumph.

“ Oh, Only a small feat…I simply moved her over to the second Universe to the left. It was nothing really.”

She said, her voice full of artificial modesty. Eros smiled at her attempt at humility. She never was very good at it.

“ What shall we do now?”

He asked. She smiled brilliantly at him and gave him a wink.

“ Why nothing, Dear Boy – simply sit back and enjoy the show.”


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy sat in brooding silence for several minutes. There was so much to digest. And she wasn’t sure she entirely believed it…but Hellmouth. That always made a convincing argument for any kind of weirdness to pop up in Sunnydale. And the weirdness had been plentiful as of late... She made up her mind to go with it, and see what they could find out at least. Stranger things had certainly happened. She smiled gamely at Willow.

“ So Faith huh?”

Willow nodded casually.

“ Yeah.”

“ Crazy Faith?”

That got a smile.

“ Uh huh.”

“ Psycho-killer Faith?”

Willow grinned wider.

“ Well she does go a little nutso on the vamps, but I wouldn’t necessarily call her a psycho-killer.”

Buffy raised an eyebrow, her tone incredulous.

“ So Faith is good now?”

Willow shrugged noncommittally.

“ Um, as far as I know she was never really bad, Buff. Not here. Faith is the one that stopped the mayor’s plans before they got too far. With your help of course…”

She added lamely, seeing the look on her friend’s face. Buffy’s frown deepened.

“ It’s just that – in my memory – or maybe my world – Faith went really psycho. She didn’t stop the mayor - she helped him. Right after she murdered the deputy mayor. Then she poisoned Angel and tried to kill me and…”

“ God, Buffy – oh no! No wonder you’re so freaked!”

“ Yeah. And it gets worse, Wil. Because of all that, and more…I had to fight her and I…well I put her in a coma for a really long time.”

Willow breathed in a hiss of shock.

“ Oh my Goddess...”

“ I know. But last year she came out of it, reaaallly pissed off and out for revenge. She had some kind of device – a magic device, that allowed her to switch bodies with me.”

Her friend’s eyes went wide.

“ She stole your body, like REALLY stole it? So you weren’t exaggerating when you said that.”

“ No, I wasn’t. She went nuts. Did all kinds of crazy stuff. She slept with Riley – in my body. He didn’t know of course. But it hurt so much! And it took me forever to get over it. Riley and I just got back to normal not that long ago.”

Willow looked stunned.

“ I don’t even know what to say. I’m kinda amazed you didn’t kill her.”

“ Oh, I wanted to. Believe me. But she ran off – like she does. All the way to Angel, who protected her – of course.”

“ I can’t believe that! After what she did?”

“ Yeah – he didn’t know at the time and – God, it’s such a long story...”

Willow’s face reflected her concern, and she asked quietly;

“ Can you tell me what happened? How did it end up?”

“ She turned herself in actually. She did the right thing, and now she’s doing time there. I don’t know when she gets out – if ever.”

“ Wow.”

“Yeah. Wow.”

“ Well, at least she did the right thing at the end. I know it doesn’t make up for anything she did to you…”

“It doesn’t, but maybe it will…eventually.” She smiled gently at her, thoughtful. “ You know, it’s funny. But the Wil I know hates Faith with a fiery passion, second only to mine.”

Willow smiled back.

“ I didn’t like her much, at first. I felt like she was taking my friends away. But then she turned out to be so good for you, and then she kinda just turned out to be good. She’s a great Slayer, Buffy. Not as good as you, of course.”

She added, patting Buffy’s knee reassuringly.

“ Yeah. Of course.”

She said not really believing it.

“ But she’s done a lot of good in the world. Averted 3 apocalypses – apocali?” Willow pondered. “ Giles says she’s really coming along.”

“That’s great I guess.” Buffy said half-heartedly, and then asked, “ She’s a good Slayer?”

“ Yeah.”

“ And she’s a good…person now?”

“ Uh huh.”

“Wow.”

Buffy got off the bed, pacing again. She felt dizzy from trying to keep up with the changes. Everything was so different. And the possibility that she was in an alternate Universe? She didn’t even know what to do with that information. A thought occurred to her and she stopped, turning to where her friend sat on the bed.

“ Am I happy, Wil? I mean here, in general?”

She smiled brightly in response.

“ You really are, Buffy. You said it was what you always wanted – to go to school and have a normal life. Be a regular girl. And you’re doing really good here. Your grades are great, and you’re so happy with Riley…”

“ Yeah, what about that? When did we get engaged? I mean we are right?”

“ Oh yeah! It was so sweet! He made such a big deal out of the proposal – I got to help plan.” She said grinning conspiratorially. “ He took you on this little tour of all the places that were special to you guys – you know like the lecture hall that he was your TA in, the quad that you had your first picnic on – ending in the school bookstore, where you first met. He told you that he had never been so happy to have a concussion in his life – cause that’s how he met you.”

“ The whole dropping books on his head thing.”

Willow nodded, beaming.

“ Yeah. Then he broke out roses and champagne and popped the question.”

“ Did I say yes right away?”

“Yup – that minute – or so ya told me.”

“ Wow.”

“ Plus he made this big deal about planning the wedding for the summer so he could take you on a big long honeymoon. You’ll be gone for like 2 months.”

“Wow.” She repeated, her mind starting to short-circuit. She sat down again, rubbing her forehead, trying to fend off an impending headache. Something important came to mind.

“ Have I met his parents yet?”

“ Yep. Nice, down to earth types.”

She worried her bottom lip nervously.

“ Do they like me?”

Willow nodded, reassuring;

“ They love you, Buffy. They already refer to you as their daughter and everything.”

“I’m running out of ‘Wows’ here…”

Willow put her arm around Buffy for reassurance.

“ I know it’s gotta be a shock. I can’t even imagine it myself. But we’ll get the gang on it and we’ll figure it out. You know we will.”

Buffy smiled weakly.

“ Yeah. I guess so. We always do.”

“ Let’s call Giles right now, okay?”

“ Okay. I’m sure I’ll feel better just hearing him say something Giles-ish.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Dear Lord, Buffy – an Alternate Universe, are you sure?”

“ Kinda?”

“ Oh Dear.”

Buffy and Willow exchanged a smile.

“See I told ya.”

She whispered to her friend, cupping her hand over the receiver.

“ What’s that?”

“ Nothing, just talking to Willow.”

“ Well, you two should come in straight away. I’ll call Xander and Faith and have them meet you here.”

“ Of course, Giles. And thank you.”

She said, sincerely grateful. He seemed momentarily stunned. When had Buffy ever said thank you for anything?

“ You’re welcome. Of course.”

He said kindly. Buffy smiled with relief. Giles was on it - they would figure it out. They always did.

“ We’ll be there as soon as we can.”

She hung up the phone.

“ Looks like it’s Scooby time again.”

Willow raised an eyebrow and put on a stuffy English-accent for Buffy’s benefit;

“Indeed.”

It was the first real smile she’d seen from her friend all day.


** Was it good for you? More to come this week. My beta is working on the new chapters as we speak... Missed you too by the way. I was in massive Spuffy withdrawls all weekend. *Must. Aquire. Laptop.* Have a great week - expect more Thursday-ish xoxoxox Rosie**
Chapter Twenty ~ Across the Universe by Soul of the Rose
** Since you've been oh-so-patient and have flattered me with all those yummy reviews, here's a brand new chappie...**


Chapter Twenty ~ Across the Universe

“ Sounds of laughter, shades of life are ringing
through my open ears inciting and inviting me.
Limitless undying love which shines around me
like a million suns and calls me on and on
across the universe…
Nothing’s gonna change my world… ”

~ the Beatles


Buffy wasn’t sure what to expect at the Magic Box now. Alternate Universes?

* Alternate Xanders?!*

That gave her brain a spin. She was deeply relieved to find the same old bright blue building standing exactly where she’d left it 24 hours ago. She followed Willow through the front door and was greeted by the familiar scents of herbs and incense.

*So far, so good.*

There was Xander, looking…Xanderish, talking to Anya at the counter. They turned to smile at her as she came in. Nice and normal. Giles seemed his usual tweedy self, mulling over the day’s receipts and drinking tea. She patted Xander’s back affectionately as she walked by. The mushy love-vibe between him and Anya was almost palpable. She felt a momentary pang; her and Riley didn’t seem to share much of that these days.

*No, just you and -*

She cut the thought off abruptly, focusing on settling herself in at the large round table designated for research. It was piled high with books and manuscripts already. This seemed to be heading in the direction of an all-nighter… Oh, well – at least she could look forward to coffee and doughnuts later. Plus lots of mid-researchy chitchat. She smiled happily to herself and rummaged for a pen and notebook in her bag. The ringing of the small brass bell over the door startled her. Who could that be? Everyone was here already…

*Oh yeah. Faith. Act natural - keep stake handy.*

“ What’s up all?”

She sauntered in casually, tight jeans and a white tank top showing off her well-sculpted body. Buffy felt self-consciously thin and frail by comparison.

*Just remember you can kick her ass.*

She reassured herself, giving her a faux smile. She wasn’t sure if she should be comforted that Faith still looked the same or not. Faith pulled out a chair from the table, straddling it and resting her arms along the back.

“ So what’s the 411, people? Giles didn’t say much on the phone.”

Just then the doorbell sounded again, and everyone turned to look. Dawn straggled in, gasping. She grinned insolently at Faith between pants.

“ Told ya you couldn’t ditch me.”

Buffy had never been so glad to see her sister in her life. It felt like weeks since she’d last laid eyes on her. She got out of her seat to greet her and pulled her into a tight hug.

“ Dawnie! I’m so happy to see you.”

Dawn hugged her back looking puzzled.

“ But I just saw you last - ”

“I know, I know – I’ll explain later.”

Was it her imagination or did Dawn’s hair look browner somehow. More chocolatey. She tucked a smooth strand behind her sister’s ear gently.

“ What’d you do to your hair, Dawnie? It looks darker…”

Dawn touched her long hair self-consciously.

“ What? Nothing. I got it cut…” She eyed Buffy warily. “ Are you okay? Cause you seem kinda weird today.’

“ Yeah, I guess. It’s been a weird kinda day.”

They walked back to the table together to sit down. Dawn situated herself between Buffy and Faith, dropping her backpack with a noisy thud. This drew a glare from both Slayers. Dawn balked at the double stare-down thrown her way.

“ Okay, okay. Sorry! Jeeze.”

Faith seemed to relent a little and leaned forward to talk to the younger girl.

“ So how’d yer day go, Squirt?”

“Ah, it was okay. Same stuff as usual.”

“ Long as you went. More than I did when I was your age.”

“ Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I please get another Faith-as-juvenile-delinquent story to keep me on the straight and narrow?”

Buffy was surprised that Faith would bother with her sister. She’d never noticed her taking an interest before. Maybe AU Faith really was good…maybe.

“ Hey, don’t be such a smart-ass. I just want ya to learn from my mistakes is all.”

Buffy smiled approvingly, warming ever so slightly to this new Faith and her seemingly un-evil intentions.

“ Yeah, Dawnie – you should listen to her. I think it’s nice that Faith wants to be a good influence on you. Lord knows you won’t let me be one.”

Dawn shot her a curious look.

“ Yeah, Kiddo. Listen up, I’m chock full a wisdom.”

Faith ruffled Dawn’s perfect hair playfully. The girl batted her hand away and patted it back into place irritably.

“ Hey! I did not spend an hour with a flat iron just for you to mess it up again.”

Faith shrugged amiably, smiling.

“ Dunno why you don’t like it curly anyway. Look at mine – it looks hot.”

There was something oddly familiar about this conversation.

“ Ever occur to you I don’t wanna look like you, Doof?”

*That’s funny they sound just like me and -*

“ Hey now, total babe over here. You oughta be happy we share any genes at all, Kid.”

All the color drained out of Buffy’s face.

Dawn rolled her eyes insolently.

“ Oh whatever. You are so full of yourself.”

But she grinned when she said it. Just like she always did when she mouthed off to her sister.

“ You know I’m right though.” Faith said poking at her playfully. “ You know you can’t wait to grow up so you can be just like your big sis.”

It felt like a mule-kick in the gut. Buffy felt all the air drain out of her lungs.

Dawn squealed and giggled at the tickling she was getting.

“ Oh right. As if!”

A dreadful sick feeling crept in.

“ Be nice, Kiddo – or I’ll tell everyone about how you used ta strip off all your clothes and run stark freakin’ naked all over the neighborhood.”

Dawn’s voice went up an octave in her outrage;

“ Hey, I was two then!”

“ See that just proves my point ‘bout your genes – ya come by it honestly.”

Faith shot her sister a bawdy wink. Dawn giggled and poked her back, smiling.

“ Well, you might have a point there. But at least I didn’t get your skanky taste in clothes.”

Her older sister’s eyebrows shot up at the jab.

“ Whoa! Harsh words from the gromit. I’m so gettin’ you for that one later.”

Dawn dismissed her with a wave of her hand.

“ I know, I know. When I least expect it… can we get on with the research already?”

Faith ruffled her hair again for good measure and turned to look at Giles who was watching the scene with amusement.

“ So anyone gonna tell me what’s goin’ on? Or do I have to wait for the apocalypse ta actually go down?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy took the first available opportunity to pull Willow into the training room alone.

“ Oh my God, Wil! Dawn is Faith’s sister? FAITH'S ?!!!”

Her voice was tinged with hysteria. Willow looked completely nonplussed.

“ What? Whaddaya mean? Of course Faith is …” Willow’s eyes grew wide when comprehension hit. “ Because you never retired in the other Universe…you were the only one. And the monks choose the Slayer to be her protector.” She gasped. “ My God, Buffy… Dawn is YOUR sister there.”

Buffy nodded, holding back the tears threatening to spill.

“ Those monks made her out of me, Wil. And I’ve been loving her and protecting her from Glory and…”

She broke down, finally. The stress of it all was too much. She felt like straight-up crazy was right around the corner. Tears streamed down her face as she thought about her sister. So many memories, manufactured or not, they felt real. Dawn was like a part of her. There was no one she was closer to. And if she wasn’t her sister anymore… Buffy couldn’t finish the thought, she could only cry harder.

Willow wrapped her arms comfortingly around her friend, her mind boggling at all the implications. Every time she thought she understood the way the Universe worked, things just got weirder. She patted Buffy’s shoulders soothingly, making little shushing sounds.

“ Oh, Sweetie – I’m so sorry. It didn’t even occur to me that this could happen. I mean this concept is still kinda new to me. I still don’t know if Vampire Willow is an AU me, or just a by-product of Anya’s magick or... I mean I couldn’t’ve made choices THAT bad, right?”

Buffy was too lost in her own misery to hear, she continued snuffling into her friend’s shoulder.

“ But focusing! The good news is that this almost proves my theory, Buffy. You have to come from an alternate Universe…things just don’t add up otherwise. So now we know, right?”

She rubbed her arms reassuringly trying to cheer her friend up a little.

“I guess so.” Buffy said sniffling. “I just wanna go back, Wil. Words cannot express the extreme wrongness of this place for me.”

Willow nodded sympathetically.

“ Of course you do. And we will figure this out. I promise…” She frowned, worrying – then she added softly;

“ I just don’t know how yet.”


** OMG! Can you believe I just did that? But wait, there's more...Mwahahahaha. It's only gonna get crazier from here, Kids. *rubs hands together evilly* Stay tuned true believers - more to come by Monday xoxoxoxox Rosie the Riveter (get it? 'cause I'm so *riveting* lol - I crack myself up...)
Chapter Twenty One ~ No Such Thing by Soul of the Rose
**Thanks for being patient, in reward here's a brand spankin' new chapter just for you...enjoy!**


Chapter Twenty One ~ No Such Thing

“ I wanna run through the halls of my high school.
I wanna scream at the top of my lungs.
I just found out there’s no such thing as the real world, Just a lie you’ve got to rise above.”

~ John Mayer



After she cried herself out, she calmed down a little. She felt horrible – confused, angry and desperate. How could this place be real? How could such things be happening? She needed information, she needed action. Sitting and waiting had never been her thing. She had to do something, anything. Buffy got up from the gym mat she’d been hunkered on and began pacing.

“ You have to tell me everything, Wil! I can’t take another surprise like that. I need to know about EVERYONE now.” Willow nodded, her eyes following Buffy back and forth across the training room.

“Okay, of course. What do you want to know?”

She stopped and looked at her, face a mask of fear.

“ What about my mom – is she… sick here? Oh my god is she DEAD?”

Her eyes went round and wide like a panicky horse. Willow rushed to her side.

“ No, Buffy – no! She’s fine.” She soothed. “ She was sick - a tumor. That’s why you didn’t end up at Northwestern. You wanted to be here for her. But she’s getting better now, Buffy. She’s okay. Everything’s okay.”

“ Is it?” She said doubtfully. “ ‘Cause I’m almost afraid to ask about Angel…”

Was he permanently Angelus here? Was he dead? Or worse yet, would she have to kill him again? The thought made her already tense stomach tighten into a clenched fist.

Willow chewed her bottom lip considering, wondering what she could say that wouldn’t upset her further.

“ Well… you broke up at the end of senior year. He wanted you to have a normal life…”

Buffy interrupted her;

“ That happened in my world too.” She frowned thoughtfully. “Maybe it was just destiny…”

“ Maybe it was then.” Willow said gently. “You took it really hard, but you finally got through it. Angel went off to L.A. to fight the good fight. I hear Wesley – that other Watcher guy, joined his team. There were times I thought you were gonna get back together… But it never happened. Then you met Riley. You could tell it hurt him, but Angel was happy for you – he wanted you to have a normal life so much.”

Buffy‘s smile was bittersweet.

“ Yeah, he did.”

*Too bad it doesn’t seem to be working out that way…like at all.*

“Tell me something else…Like; were there any other guys here?”

She pushed on, wanting to change the subject to something less painful. Willow thought for a moment.

“Oh! You almost hooked up with this complete Mr. Wrong in disguise. But you managed to stop it before it went too far. We found out later he was a total womanizing man-whore.”

*Uh oh. I know this one…*

“ Parker Abrams?”

Buffy asked sheepishly.

“Yeah, exactly. Did that happen there too?”

She turned towards the window unable to meet her friend’s eyes.

“ Well, sort of. Only I didn’t stop it before it was too late…”

Willow looked horrified and stood to face her.

“ Oh, Buffy – oh no! Did you? Did he? I mean did you guys…?”

Buffy blushed uncomfortably.

“ Um. Yeah. Soon to be followed by the inevitable guilt and repercussions of sleeping with a total womanizing-man whore.”

Willow rubbed her shoulder sympathetically.

“ Aw, Sweetie. I’m sorry. You seem okay though. Are you okay?”

Buffy shrugged.

“ Pretty much. I mean I met Riley afterwards and he was great. Is great, I mean.”

She covered quickly.

Riley was a touchy subject right now. Here they were engaged, but there? Lately it felt like they were drifting further and further apart everyday. And that was before Spike jumped into her (pants) problems.

“ Yeah, he really is.”

Willow smiled brightly.

*Time for another change of conversation here…*

“ Maybe we should go back in now? Try to figure this whole thing out?”

She moved toward the door. Willow nodded agreeably.

“ Yeah – if anyone will have some insight, it’s Giles.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“ I’m sorry, Buffy – I don’t have any insight into this at the moment. I’ve heard of alternate dimensions, alternate realities – some very well documented. But an alternate Universe falls into the realm of physics I’m afraid – and therefore outside my area of expertise.”

He ran his fingers through his hair, sighing in frustration.

“ Actually, Giles – it sorta falls into the area of meta-physics which kinda brings it back into ours. Here, I brought some books with me…”

Willow rummaged through her backpack and handed Giles several books. He shuffled through them, looking exceedingly skeptical.

“ Are we even certain that this is what’s happened here? ” He turned to Buffy “ You didn’t bump your head or...”

He trailed off when Buffy shot him a look of supreme annoyance.

“ No Giles. This is not ‘All My Children’. I don’t have amnesia - or an illegitimate love child with my former stepbrother. Sorry to disappoint.”

Xander smirked at that, but kept his peace while Willow ran interference. All the in-fighting made her anxious.

“ I know it’s not amnesia, Giles. She doesn’t exhibit any of the signs. She remembers things fine, she just remembers them differently. That’s what got me thinking about alternate Universes.”

Faith raised a curious eyebrow.

“ Like what kinda differences, B?”

Buffy and Willow exchanged a furtive glance. Certain things would upset Faith. A lot.

“ Well, like I’m not engaged to Riley there. Oh – plus I moved out of the dorms almost two months ago and back home.”

Dawn looked at her, slightly stunned.

“ Crazy. No wonder you were actin’ freaky earlier.”

She said sympathetically. Buffy felt an enormous pang just looking at her.

*She still feels like my sister.*

“ So what’re we supposed ta do about it?”

Faith asked flippantly.

“ Well, the first step will be research of course - ”

Giles started. She cut him off, rising from the table.

“ That’s all I needed to hear. I’m out. Lemme know when you got somethin’ for me ta kill. Best thing I can do right now is patrol.”

Dawn gathered her things, looking apologetic.

“ Sorry, Buffy. Let me know if there’s anything I can do.”

She hugged her warmly before following dutifully behind her sister.

“ Later, B. Bye all. Gimme a call if you get any info.”

Buffy’s eyes followed Faith enviously out the door. She itched to join her, to REPLACE her. To lose herself in the immediacy of an all out fight, finding the answers she sought in fists and blood. But she was stripped of her right to it here - how she hated that. It made her feel soft and weak and powerless. Just another helpless human waiting to become a victim. Not a feeling she wanted to get used to. She took a deep breath to steady herself. She only had to do this for a few days, tops. …Right?

“ Goodnight, Faith.”

Giles said quietly.

The door closed with a jingle of the small brass bell.

Xander looked up from his comfortable sprawl at the research table.

“ Good to know you can count on Faith when the chips are down.”

Willow scowled at him.

“ Xander, you know she’s never been good at the research stuff.”

He moved his feet off the table and leaned forward.

“ Yeah, well she doesn’t even try, Wil. It’s like she thinks she’s above it all or something.”

“ Above US, you mean.”

Anya threw in her two cents and sat down next to her fiancé.

“ Exactly.”

He nodded patting her thigh. Willow frowned at them.

“ She’s doing a good job. We should cut her a break. Not everyone can be Buffy ya know.”

Xander looked across the table at the girl in question, considering her thoughtfully.

“ No. They really can’t.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours later the doughnuts were gone and the coffee reservoirs depleted – but they’d learned little more than they started with. Willow sighed with frustration and closed her book.

“ This isn’t going anywhere, Giles. I think I need to get on the Internet and research.”

Giles removed his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose wearily.

“ Certainly. Perhaps we should call it a night then. Let me know what you find out tomorrow.”

Willow and Buffy began packing up their things. Buffy felt a surge of affectionate gratitude for her little homemade family.

*Thank god I have them here.*

“ Thanks, guys. I know this isn’t end-of-the-world stuff exactly.”

“ Of course, Buffster. What else would I do with my Friday night?”

Xander patted her arm affectionately, and then steered Anya out the door quickly before she could say anything HE might regret.

“ Call me when ya need me.”

He called over his shoulder on the way out the door. Buffy and Willow exchanged amused smiles. Willow shouldered her backpack and headed for the door.

“ Walkin’ home with me, Buff?”

“ Yeah. Just a sec, ‘ kay?”

There was something she had to do first. She found Giles behind the counter with a copy of Gryffindor’s Compendium flipping through the section on trans-dimensional journeys. He sighed tiredly and sipped at the tea in his favorite green porcelain mug.

“ Still nothing, I’m afraid. But we will keep trying.”

His voice was reassuring to Buffy’s ears.

“ It’s okay, Giles. I know we’ll figure it out.”

He smiled kindly at her, exhaustion written clearly in the deep lines of his face.

“ Giles…I…”

Buffy twisted her fingers together anxiously; this kind of thing didn’t come naturally to her. But with all that had happened, she didn’t want to miss out on another opportunity. If anything, this whole experience was showing her what she really had – and how easily it could all disappear.

“…I just wanted to say – thanks. Thank you for doing this for me. I know I’m not a Slayer here anymore - ”

“ Nonsense. You’ll always be a Slayer, Buffy. It’s who you are.”

She beamed at him, taking his compliment deeply to heart - then kissed his cheek sweetly.

“ I just want you to know that I appreciate it. You’re always so good to me.”

“ It’s my pleasure, really. It’s been wonderful to see you. Your absence has been… well; I’d say it’s been deeply felt. By all of us.”

“ I’ll just have to come around more often then.”

He smiled warmly at her, touched. He’d forgotten how dear she could be.

“ Goodnight, Giles.”

“ Goodnight.”

She grabbed her bag from the table and followed Willow out of the Magic Box, locking the door behind her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow and Buffy walked back to the campus in companionable silence, their brains working overtime trying to process all the events of the day. Willow’s mind whirred away at light-speed running calculations and cross-referencing them with teleportation spells and quantum theory.

*I wonder if I should try to get a hold of D. Adams’ “ Theories on Pan-Universal Travel”?*

And her brain was off and running again.

Buffy mulled over the events of the last 24 hours. She’d gained and lost an entire life literally overnight. Here she was in a different Universe now (!???) with a new life, no sister, no job, a new fiancé, but the same parents, the same friends and ________ her synapses blew. She just couldn’t comprehend it all. It was too much. She’d dealt with strange stuff before; giant demons, vampires, cults, and lately an actual Hell god, but nothing like this. Traveling to a different Universe? What the fuck?!

*Next thing you know they’ll be bringing me back from the dead.*

She thought irritably. Why were the Powers screwing with her? She did her job, she did it well. What else did they want with her? She’d already given up a normal life to be the Slayer. She’d lost Angel; her mother was sick, now they’d taken Dawn from her. All she had left were Giles, her friends and Spike.

*Whoa! Spike? How’d he make that list?*

And more importantly why didn’t Riley?

*It was just off the top of my head. It didn’t mean anything.*

I mean she was engaged wasn’t she? …Except she wasn’t. In her world Riley was nowhere near proposing. In fact, things weren’t going that great lately.

*Not since Spike started hanging around so much.*

She thought crossly. And there he was again. In her thoughts, in her life, in her dreams…

*I’m afflicted with Bubonic Spike.*

That made her smile. He was a pesty little plague wasn’t he? Always at her door, wanting to patrol, at Scooby meetings wanting to help. Everywhere she went, you would find him. He was kinda

*Stalkerish?*

No… dedicated. And last night left no doubt as to the reason why. He was in love with her.

*Spike is in love with me.*

She waited for the inevitable feeling of horror to set in.


…..
……… *Hey, where’s the horror? *

It wasn’t there. She only felt strangely comforted. Spike was out there somewhere loving her. And if he could, he would help her, or die trying. She knew that instinctively.

*Maybe I should try to find him here….?*

Not for anything funny – no sex. No sir. Just so he could help. Absolutely. She didn’t miss him or anything. She didn’t need him. He could be useful is all. Besides the chances that AU Spike loved her were

*Pretty good actually.*

All things being equal in Spike Land… Not that it mattered. Not that she cared one way or another. Nope. She just needed all the help she could get right now. Maybe she’d just go look him up later. Maybe tonight… She interrupted Willow’s musings.

“So how about Spike? Is he still around somewhere?”

She tried to sound casual. She was just politely curious of course. No harm in asking, right?

*Right!*

Her mind agreed all too eagerly.

“ Well yeah. Of course. Or not of course, I guess. Cause you don’t have Faith there so…Hmmm… Is he still with Harmony, Oo! Or Drusilla?”

Willow puzzled. Buffy frowned, curious at where this was heading.

“ Um, no – neither. He was with Harmony awhile back but he ditched her a little while ago for…nobody.”

Buffy cut her slip of the tongue off lamely. But Willow didn’t seem to notice.

“Huh. That’s interesting. Is your Spike good now? Or mostly good?”

Buffy shrugged, smiling.

“ Kinda, mostly. Yeah. The Initiative put a chip in his head and now- ”

Willow cut her off;

“He doesn’t hunt or kill anything except demons.”

Buffy nodded, not entirely surprised to find Spike the same in this world.

“ Right. Exactly.”

*I wonder if we ever got together here…*

She thought idly – her mind turning inexorably towards their last night together.

“ Only it wasn’t the chip that really changed him here.”

Willow continued.

“No?”

Buffy asked only mildly curious, her mind preoccupied with images of Spike as he knelt before her. Spike as he slid his fingers inside her. Spike when she held his hardened cock in her hands. She felt a hot flush creep up the back of her neck and spread to her face and chest.

Willow shook her head, smiling wonderingly. As if she still couldn’t believe it herself.

“ Uh-uh. It was Faith.”

** Thank you for the many wonderful reviews you left. You guys rock! *smooch* FYI - I am responding to your reviews, so if you have a question - or just want to give me a happy, please leave one. It only makes me write faster, ya know. New chapter by Wed or Thu. Inappropriate PDA to all, Rosie xoxoxoxox**
Chapter Twenty Two ~ How Long Has This Been Goin' On? by Soul of the Rose
** Yer not gonna like it...**

Chapter Twenty Two ~ How Long Has This Been Goin’ On?

“ I could cry salty tears –
Where have I been all these years?
Little wow, tell me now –
How long has this been goin’ on? ”

~ Peggy Lee


Buffy’s heart skipped a beat.

*And the cataclysmic shocks just keep on coming…*

“ Faith as in Crazy Faith? Faith changed him?”

*Hold on, that doesn’t mean they’re together…*

“ Well… yeah, at least from what I can tell. It’s not like Spike’s Mr. Forthcoming, all makin’ with the info. I just kinda figured it out for myself. At first, we didn’t know what his dealy was. He just started pitching in, helping out. He went on patrol with you guys a bunch. Then just with Faith after you retired. He kept getting better and better. Doing more good. And then I started noticin’ the sparks flyin’- ”

“There were sparks?”

Buffy asked weakly. Willow nodded, smiling.

“ Yeah, big crazy ones. And before ya knew it they made the hook up.”

Unfortunately she could picture just exactly what kind of hook up all too well. That ill feeling started creeping back into her stomach again.

“ Wasn’t Xander mad? He hates Spike.”

She asked anxiously, picturing the worrying damage Xander would no doubt try to inflict.

“ He was kinda. At first. But then he said if anyone could handle Spike it was Faith.”
Willow shook her head, smiling. “ They just sorta made sense together. So now they patrol every night and they’ve been dating for months now. Which has got to be some kinda record for Faith.”

Her nausea grew exponentially.

“ Is… is Spike happy do you think?”

She asked tentatively, afraid of what the answer might be.

“ I dunno – is Spike ever happy? He’s less evil…”

Willow shrugged non-comittally.

“Oh. Well that’s good I guess.”

Willow failed to notice the crestfallen look on her friend’s face.

“ Yeah – I think they help keep each other out of trouble in a way. Gives ‘em a vent for all that excess energy.”

Buffy got an instant and seriously unwanted visual of Faith and Spike doing exactly that.

*Is that what we’re calling it now?*

“ You okay, Buff? You look kinda green around the gills there.”

“ Sure. I’m fine. It’s just hard trying to keep up with the changes here.”

She covered, with an artificial smile.

“ Oh. Well sure. Funny, even the little differences huh?” Willow shook her head wonderingly. “ Like I know you’re Buffy. You feel like Buffy to me, you know?”

“ Yeah. I do.”

Buffy smiled back at her, genuinely this time.

“ But you’re not. You don’t belong here – it hurts you to be here. And my Buffy is… I don’t know where. The older I get, the less it seems like I know.”

It was good to be reminded that this was not her world, not her life (not her Spike!). And if she had her way, it never would be…

“ The Universe just keeps on with the wacky, huh?”

“ Yeah.”

They walked along quietly for a while, amazed at the circumstances that would bring their two worlds together. Buffy thought of her mother ill at home. Would she get well too? Did she need her there now? And what about Dawn - vulnerable to attack without her to protect her? And finally her own Spike alone in his crypt back home. Was he lonely? Would he miss her? Would he understand if she didn’t come back? Or would other Buffy be there to comfort him?

*And why doesn’t that make me feel better? Like at all…*

But other Buffy was engaged so she’d probably seek out Riley first.

*Oh shit – Riley!*

Somehow she’d managed to forget him - again. What was wrong with her? She had this great boyfriend who loved her and wanted to make her happy, but somehow he kept slipping her mind. It was just the circumstances – all the weird stuff she was dealing with. That had to be it. It made perfect sense really. Except for one little thing – she’d never managed to forget Spike. Not for a second, not for a moment. In fact hadn’t her very waking thought been

*Spike.*

She’d mistaken Riley for him for just an instant. She’d thought it was his arms she was waking up in. And she’d been pretty damn happy about it. Buffy felt a deep surge of guilt. She was hands down the world’s A #1 WORSTgirlfriend. Not to mention what happened in the cemetery the other night… She blushed at the thought.

*And again I ask myself ; “What the hell is wrong with you?”*

She’d been neglecting him all day too. Missed their lunch date and never even called.

*Bad, bad Buffy …*

She scolded herself. She probably should go see him, try to make it up to him. Smooth things over, if only for other Buffy’s sake. She didn’t want to be the one to ruin her engagement. After all she hoped to return to her own world soon.

*Please God.*

She prayed fervently. Every moment she was here seemed to bring a new and awful revelation. She was almost afraid of what she might see next. Buffy desperately needed some time alone to think things through. Life was confusing even before she made her sudden departure. As if it wasn’t bad enough to be having weird feelings for Spike – not to mention one seriously naughty encounter. It was hard to disentangle that from her already strained relationship with Riley. Add on the problems and implications of traveling to an alternate Universe and you had some severe brain-fry. Buffy really needed a time out.

“ Hey, Wil? I don’t want you to feel like I’m ditching you or anything but I really need some time to clear my head.”

Willow looked at her kindly.

“ Of course, Sweetie. Who can blame ya?”

“ I think I’m gonna take a walk then. Try to locate a little Zen. After that I should probably go see Riley. I ditched him for lunch already today and it’s giving me a bad case of the guilts. Even if he’s not my Riley, I still feel for him, ya know?”

Willow nodded sympathetically.

“ I understand. Are you gonna tell him about all this?”

“ I don’t know, Wil. I can hardly handle it myself. And Riley’s not that good with stuff like this. He likes his Universe nice and orderly. I think it might just hurt him. He’d have all kinds of questions. He might wonder why we aren’t engaged over there – and have doubts and…I think it would just mess things up.”

“ I can see how it could. Totally. Maybe you better not then - at least for now. With any luck we’ll have you back in your own place in just a few days and Riley will never even have to know.”

She smiled winningly at Buffy who crossed her fingers and replied;

“ Here’s hoping.”

“ Call me if you need anything, ‘ kay? I’ll be at Tara’s or in the library makin’ with the research. ”

“ Thanks, Wil.”

She smiled at Willow and hugged her warmly, feeling supremely blessed to have her as a best friend. If anything, this whole experience was showing Buffy how lucky she was. She never realized how much she had to be grateful for. She had a loving mother, a wonderful sister and amazing friends. Everywhere she turned in her life there was love. And yet she’d spent the better part of the last four years bitching and complaining about – well, everything.

*Guess I’m a glass half-empty kinda gal.*

She thought walking off towards Riley’s. Buffy couldn’t begin to count the number of times she’d wished to not be the Slayer - she’d hoped, she’d cried, she’d prayed. She’d spent so much time hating her life and wanting something different that she’d never bothered to notice what she got in return. If she’d never been the Slayer she never would have met Willow, Xander or Giles. She would never have loved Angel, or had those sweet memories of their relationship. And in spite of the pain she’d experienced, she wouldn’t trade it in. She smiled warmly thinking of him. This last year he’d really become a good friend to her and she was thankful for that.

The love they once shared seemed to transform itself into a solid friendship. She was glad that they could both move on with their lives now. A part of her would probably always love him; he was her first real love, first sex, first heartbreak. How could she ever forget that? But now she was content to let it melt into a warm glow of nostalgia, think of him fondly and wish him well. It would be nice to think he might find someone too and be… well – as happy as he could be.

Just as she intended to be. It was becoming pretty clear that life is brutally short - you have to grab happiness with both hands while you can.(And where have I heard that before?) She was realizing how quickly everything could be taken away from her. Buffy was so tired of being miserable and mopey. The life she’d spent so much time complaining about had been yanked right out from under her and now she felt like she’d do anything to get it back.

She could hardly believe she’d lost Dawn like that. Her mind was nowhere near accepting that she was Faith’s sister now. There was yet another gift being Chosen had brought her. It was hard to adjust at first, Dawn seemed like such a total pain in her ass. Always underfoot and in the way - kinda like a brand new puppy. But now, she was a part of her and Buffy felt her love growing for her sister every day. She had never felt so fiercely protective of another person before.

What was she thinking when she retired? How could she just walk away like that? Buffy knew she didn’t have the whole picture yet – but she definitely got the sense that other Buffy didn’t see the gang that much anymore. Giles had even said how much they all missed her. Thank God she still had Willow, but how could she let everyone else just drift? How could she not see Giles?! He was like a father to her, more so than her own dad had ever been. And Xander was her best male friend, and practically a brother.

She walked along, deep in thought - pondering the mysteries of AU Buffy’s decisions. Here she was smack in the middle of the life of her supposed dreams. Just your everyday college girl with a nice-guy fiancé and no more worries than her GPA and where to have her wedding. Normal as normal could be.

Had she really wanted this?

She’d been retired less than a day and was already hating it. It made her feel all useless and stripped of power. She didn’t know how other Buffy could stand it. And letting Faith take over – of all people. She shook her head in disbelief. What a crazy existence it was that such things could happen. Events could line up just so to make her life turn out completely different. What was that saying? The one her mom always used…Oh yeah;

"Careful what you wish for – you just might get it."

And that could not be truer in this case could it? Her whole life had become unrecognizable to her. And this so could’ve been her - really her. She clearly remembered the scenario Willow had described. There had been talk about Faith taking over and her retiring to get an education. It almost happened. Almost. Before Faith decide to take a spin on the dark side that is.

*Guess I don’t have to ask “what if” anymore, huh?*

And she was freakin’ engaged! To Riley! I mean it was all well and good to date him, he was a wonderful boyfriend (mostly). He was good and sweet and kind to her - and Buffy really appreciated the sense of stability and normalcy he’d brought to her life. But MARRIAGE?! As in FOREVER? Whoa. There was no way she was ready for that. Especially with him. She was starting to realize that they’d been having some serious problems for awhile now. He always seemed worried and fearful and would never tell her what was wrong unless she dragged it out of him. Then there was the whole lack of sex issue lately – and hello, nineteen here! Not quite in need of Viagra yet.

*At least I’m not.*

She thought irritably. And what was his problem anyway? He hardly seemed to want to anymore. And when they did – well, let’s just say waking the neighbors was never an issue. She was kinda bored actually… But maybe she was being unfair, maybe she wasn’t giving him a real chance. Things were kinda crazy lately. Even before this whole alternative Universe mess. Mom was sick and Glory was after Dawn. Maybe if she paid a little more attention to him and their relationship things would be alright.

*Hey, it could happen.*

Her shoulders sagged under the weight of it all. There was so much to deal with at the moment and she felt downright exhausted. What she really needed was a decent night’s sleep. Maybe Willow would have some news for her tomorrow. Then she could get out of this crazy place and get down to the business of straightening up the mess her actual life was in.

*Let other Buffy deal with her own problems!*

All she had to do was try not to mess anything up here until she made it back home.
Buffy thought she’d never be so happy to see her own little Hellmouth and screwed up version of Sunnydale again.

*God yes! Just give me back my life again!*

Just one little thing left to do. Gotta smooth things out with Riley.
She sighed wearily and squared her shoulders preparing to do her girlfriendly duty.



** Okay, okay - calm down already. It's just a plot device! If there was no bad guy and no obstacles it wouldn't be much of a story now would it? Take a deep breathe and relax. I promised you a happy ending, didn't I? *smooch* xoxoxoxox Rosie**
Chapter Twenty Three ~ Good Morning, Heartache by Soul of the Rose
** You'll be happy to know this chapter is completely Spaith free. (But I make no apologies for the Biley) Relax, it's relatively minor. Now, let the Riley bashing begin ...**



Chapter Twenty Three ~ Good Morning, Heartache

“ Good Morning, Heartache, you old gloomy sight.
Good Morning, Heartache.
Thought we said goodbye last night.
I turned and tossed until it seemed you had gone – but here you are with the dawn.
Wish I’d forget you – but you’re here to stay.
It seems I met you when my love went away.
Now every day I start by saying to you :
Good Morning, Heartache – what’s new?”

~ Billie Holiday



Riley looked up at her from his place on the bed. Various books and papers scattered around him as he studied. He smiled at her adoringly.

“ Hey, Beautiful. I missed you at lunch today.”

“ Yeah. Sorry about that - I had some stuff I had to take care of. School stuff.”

She covered ineptly. He didn’t seem to notice.

“ That’s alright, Honey. Glad you got some good things done. Besides, after this summer we’ll have our whole lives to spend together. I think I can spare you for a lunch or two.”

Buffy tried very hard to smile sincerely. Since when had smiling at her boyfriend become an issue? He was so kind and well meaning and…she just didn’t have the heart for it right now. She felt like life had given her the big smack down – like WWF style. She was totally drained emotionally and physically. Even dealing with an alternate Riley seemed like too much to bear at the moment.

She was relieved when he didn’t try to talk to her about anything. Or touch her beyond a soft kiss on the cheek. He seemed happy to just be in her presence. It made her feel wretchedly guilty. When did he get this far away from her? It seemed like not that long ago they were so close. Couldn’t wait to see each other, to be together. But lately they rarely spent time with each other. And when was the last time they had sex? Two weeks ago? Three?

She felt like it was all her fault. She’d been neglecting him lately, she knew it. Just pile on another whopping dose of guilt, thank you very much. And then there was the added pressure to not screw up other Buffy’s life. If AU Buffy was ready to get married who was she to ruin it for her? So when Riley offered to take her to dinner, she just couldn’t bring herself to say no.

She owed them both it seemed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An hour later they sat across from each other at a small table at Pannevino, the nicest Italian restaurant in Sunnydale. It was situated on a hillside overlooking the city, giving a lovely view of the twinkling lights below. Buffy wished she could appreciate it more, but the sumptuous surroundings just seemed ostentatious instead of elegant. That reaction was reinforced when she looked at the prices on the menu. You could easily spend $100 here on wine and appetizers alone.

“Um, Riley? Are you sure we can afford this?”

She asked cautiously.

“ Of course. Nothing’s too good for my girl.” He dismissed jovially. “ Besides I got a huge severance package from the Initiative.”

“ What do you mean?”

“ Well after we stopped Adam, they shifted the operation over to simply seek and destroy. Didn’t I tell you about this already?”

“Remind me.”

Riley shrugged.

“ They wanted to make me head of the entire unit. But with you retiring, I just couldn’t see continuing with that lifestyle.” He seemed to shudder visibly. “ And have I told you lately how glad I am that you’re done with all that?”

He took her hand and kissed it gently.

“ You deserve so much more than that, Buffy. You deserve an amazing life – and that’s exactly what I’m going to give you.”

Buffy plastered on a smile for his benefit, feeling the walls closing in around her. She tried to catch her breath while Riley ordered their dinner. Fifty dollars worth of pasta – soup and salad not included. She was deeply unimpressed. Buffy would’ve much rather gone to a little local place with great atmosphere and wonderful food – at half the price. Some over-priced chain with locations in Las Vegas, San Diego and LA had nothing on Paesano’s around the corner as far as she was concerned. But try telling Riley that. Try telling Riley anything for that matter. He did nothing but talk all night.

He told her all about their future – how they were moving to Iowa and in with his parents to save money after graduation. Then Riley would join his grandfather in the family business in Iowa City. They’d be happy and buy a house. Buffy would never have to work of course. She’d stay home and raise the kids and “make a nice home” for them. He ran on and on about every detail of their lives practically up to retirement. Buffy wondered if her alternate self was really and truly happy with this. ‘Cause she had only been doing it for all of one night and already she wanted to brain him with the empty wine bottle. Nothing permanent – just get him to shut up for five minutes.

Would dinner never end?!

Finally the check came. She gladly skipped the tempting looking cheesecake in favor of a quick exit. She made an excuse about homework to avoid spending the night and left him in his car with a quick peck on the lips. She’d never been so relieved to see the backend of a date in her life. The whole night felt like long, slow suffocation - and Riley was the pillow over her face. Damn could the man talk! And talk and talk and talk. She’d hardly gotten a dozen words in the entire evening. Though in a way, that was a relief. At least she hadn’t been forced to lie about anything. She’d just smiled and nodded her way through dinner. She was really beginning to feel sorry for other Buffy. Did the girl have any idea the life of stultifying boredom she was in for?

And what about her? Was this who her Riley really was? Had she been blind all this time? Never noticing how controlling he was? How wrapped up in himself and his own ideas about everything? Is this the life she was in for if she stayed on this path? The thought made her shudder. But how could she tell? AU Buffy made decisions she thought she wouldn’t make…

Buffy shook her head as she unlocked her door. Thank God this wasn’t her real life, she wasn’t the one stuck here. …Or was she? It had been a whole day already and she showed no signs of exiting this crazy place so far. Giles and Willow had vague ideas but no solutions. She couldn’t help wondering if this was going to be a permanent placement. Buffy sighed heavily and flopped down on her bed. Kicking off her strappy high heels she lay back pondering.

She was absolutely exhausted, quickly becoming too tired to think anymore. Didn’t look like she’d need any Tylenol PM tonight.

*Thank God - look what happened last time!*

Although, it would be nice if she woke up back in her own world tomorrow… But that would be just too easy wouldn’t it? And these things never had easy solutions. Sometimes it seemed like she spent the entire school year fighting evil beasties and thwarting apocali. The only time things ever seemed to slow down was during the summer.

*Ugh! Enough thinking. Sleep now.*

She was almost past the point of coherent thought. Buffy had just enough energy left to locate her yummy sushi pajamas and brush her teeth before bed. She did a quick run through of her evening beauty rituals and crawled into the comfort of her bed with profound gratitude.

All she wanted now was eight full hours of lovely, dreamless sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eros and Aphrodite stood solemnly at the foot of Buffy’s bed. What a day it had been – the things he’d seen! They had followed the Slayer from morning till night. He was amazed at his mother’s abilities – he’d learned much today at her side.

“ What next, Mother?”

The goddess looked thoughtfully at the sleeping girl in front of her.

“ She’s vulnerable right now, open to suggestion. This is a fine time for dream work, I’d say.”

“ Another dream? But I sent her one already – a glimpse.” He hung his head sadly. “ It failed.”

“ Not a glimpse of what could be – but a look into her future is what’s warranted. Let her see where this path will take her. ” Aphrodite frowned, thunder gathering on her clear brow. “ Let her see where her damnable stubbornness leads.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy moaned low in her throat and rolled over in her sleep. A series of images ran through her brain; there was Tara with half her mind gone, Glory torturing Spike, Giles oozing blood from an awful wound, Dawn kidnapped…and all their running in vain.

“ No!…”

She called out futilely – but the images didn’t stop.

A tower teetered in the distance, a rickety skeleton of found materials that reached bleakly into the sky. Her sense of dread and fear was overpowering – but she could do nothing. It played out like a horror movie in front of her, one she couldn’t walk out on.

The battle waged, she fought and bled – struggling with Glory up and down the unsteady structure only to end it on the ground. She beat the god down into submission, punishing her with a deadly war hammer. Triumph! She was defeated at long last! It would all be alright…it was alright. Tears of relief slipped down her sleeping cheeks. Glory was beaten, the war was over – it was over and Dawn was…

*No!*

A man was with her, a sinister figure in black with a knife in his hand.

*Spike! Thank God, Spike…*

It would be okay, Spike was with her and he promised - he promised ‘til the end of the world’…

But it wasn’t okay. Spike was losing this fight. She watched him plummet through the black night, duster flapping in the wind as he fell to the deadly cement beneath them.

She cried her terror into her pillow. Was he dead? Shattered and ruined on the ground below? Was this the final thing that ended him? It couldn’t be, she couldn’t lose him, not now… But he wasn’t moving, and she couldn’t see – couldn’t will her dream self closer to look in on him. She was stuck on the tower with Dawn and the man in black.

Muffled sobs filled the night in her otherwise silent dorm room.

The shining blade was raised and poised with care at her sister’s abdomen. With artistry he began to carve into the girl in front of him.

“ Shallow cuts…” he said quietly. “ Shallow cuts… let the blood flow free.”

And then she was there, her physical self. Dawn cried out to her;

“ Buffy!”

It could still turn out right – all might yet be well. The man in black followed Spike to the ground, screaming. Buffy took the briefest second to enjoy the deep sense of satisfaction his death brought her. It was alright, Dawn was safe – they made it. She helped the bleeding girl away from the precarious edge she’d been bound to. It was all going to be fine… She had Dawn and Spike just had to be okay. She couldn’t lose him now. She WOULDN'T.

She sighed and turned over, tugging her blanket with her.

The night crackled with blue-white energy and blinding light behind them. The world screamed as the walls between dimensions came crashing down. Lightning cut the night as the earth trembled and split. A deadly, medieval looking dragon winged through the air from a fissure in the shattered sky above them.

It was too late. The ritual had begun.

She watched helplessly as the Universe literally unraveled around her.

Buffy moaned in her sleep and twisted fretfully in her nest of blankets.

She saw, but could not stop the coming apocalypse. She felt her twin self’s resolve – saw her kiss Dawn goodbye. She turned to face the rising sun with a look of determined grace. Buffy screamed in horror as she watched herself dive into the chaotic mass of ultra-violet energy in the sky.

Her body became a lightning rod, absorbing the thunderbolts that once attacked the fabric of reality. She trembled and shook with the force of it, spasmed as if in the midst of electroshock – then at last was still. The dimensional gates closed, shrinking in on themselves to nothing as her lifeless body fell to the ground.

Buffy wept in her sleep, helpless to do more.

The sun rose fully in the sky, gently lighting her dead form. She saw the tears on her friend’s faces, on her sister’s. And at last she saw Spike, crouching near her and somehow more broken from her death than his own fall from impossible heights. Sobs wracked his body as he broke down and cried out the loss of her. She heard him weeping her name…

“ Buffy…Buffy…God, no…”

The scene changed to full daylight – a pretty, grassy place full of flowers. A lovely weeping willow tree hung over a rock maybe? What was that? In the dappled shade she could almost see… the branches parted to show her a speckled gray slab of marble. She recognized the shape of a headstone immediately. The inscription at last became clear;

Buffy Anne Summers

1981 to 2001

Beloved Sister
Devoted Friend

She saved the world a lot.


She sat bolt upright in her bed heart lodged in her throat with her strangled scream, tears running unchecked down her face. That was the worst nightmare she’d ever had. But it was more than a nightmare – she felt the weight of foresight settle on her shoulders.

“ No.”

But she could not deny the reality of the images that filled her mind. They were too visceral, too painful.

*Prophecy.*

She buried her face in her hands and cried.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy waited until the sun peeped through the blinds to call Giles. She’d spent the rest of the night wide-eyed with misery caught somewhere between tears and terror. Was this really what was going to happen? Was this unavoidably her destiny? She thought back to the prophetic dreams she’d had of the Master. She’d dreamed her death then too, and look how THAT turned out.

She put on a brave front for Giles, but even over the phone he could sense her distress. Thank God he was an early riser – he was already drinking his morning tea when her call came. Buffy hadn’t wanted him to go to so much trouble but he insisted on coming to get her. In retrospect she was glad, the last thing she wanted in the world was to be alone right now. Giles’ fatherly presence would bring her comfort and some much-needed stability. But she found herself thinking of someone else she wanted more. Some one she could be herself with, someone who would see through all of her defenses to the weepy chicken within. He might tease her a little, but just so she’d smile. He had that funny way of disarming her and putting her at ease at the same time.

*God, Spike where are you?*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She had just enough time for a quick shower and fresh clothes before Giles came knocking. Buffy felt slightly calmer, but the vivid images from her dream haunted her. Pain, chaos, destruction, death… Spike in broken pieces on the ground. Dawn’s blood running in gory rivulets down her body. The dreary gray finality of her own gravestone. Buffy shuddered involuntarily, feeling suddenly sick and shivery. Her Watcher’s brow furrowed with concern.

“ Buffy, are you quite alright?”

“No.”

She replied miserably.

“ Tell me what I can do for you.”

He sat on the bed beside her and gently stroked her back, soothing her. She’d given him a brief sketch of her dream on the phone. But what was worrying him now was the pale cast of her complexion and the sick fear that showed plainly in her eyes. He frowned with worry. The poor girl had been through so much already.

*Far too much for one so young.*

Buffy shook her head in the negative.

“ I don’t know, Giles. I don’t know what anyone can do…” She paused and chewed her thumbnail fretfully. “ What if there’s nothing to be done and I…” she swallowed.

And this time it would be the real deal, a permanent time out in the pine penalty box. Game over and no extra plays. She’d seen her own headstone fer chrissakes! Buffy shivered again and pulled her soft pink cardigan more tightly around her shoulders. Giles patted her soothingly.

“ We mustn’t jump to conclusions, Buffy. We don’t know what your dream meant. It -”

She cut him off.

“ I do. I know exactly what it meant.”

She rose from the bed to stare out the window desolately.

“ It means I’m going to die.”




** Oooo! Was that angst-a-licious or what? More to come by Friday ... I'd like to promise it sooner, but I'm still in recovery from the SD Comic Con last weekend. My mind's all a-whirl... Joss says Hi by the way...xoxoxox Rosie **
Chapter Twenty Four ~ Ruler of My Heart by Soul of the Rose
** This is how much I love you; I drag myself from my sick bed just to update for you. And I'm feeling spectacularly crapturous today. (which is like craptastic, only more so). So here's a brand spankin' new chappie just for you. Are you feelin' the love yet? *Snuffly smooches* Rosie xoxoxox
PS - Beware the Spaithness. It's particularly vile this chapter. (Now you can't say I didn't warn ya) ;p **



Chapter Twenty Four ~ Ruler of My Heart

“ Ruler of my heart, father of my soul – where can you be?
I wait patiently. My heart cries out, pain inside.
Where can you be? I wait patiently.
When you’re alone, the goin’ gets rough.
Come back, come back, come back – I’ve had enough.
Make me a queen, happy again. Hear my cry, please, my king.”

~ Lisa Fischer



It was a solemn group that gathered at the Magic Box that morning. So very different from the laughing friends that sat at that same table the day before. Xander took one look at her drawn face and gathered her into his arms. He hugged her tight and rested his cheek on the glossy crown of her hair, protective as any brother could ever be.

“ It’ll be alright, Buff. I promise.”

He kissed her softly on the top of her head before letting her go. Willow took her hand and sat next to her at the overloaded table.

“ We’ll fix this, Buffy. You know we will. We won’t let anything happen to you.”

She said it with all the comforting reassurance she could muster. Buffy tried hard to smile back at her friend. But deep inside she felt the cold fingers of death already reaching for her. Is this what she came here for? To die? She squeezed Willow’s hand briefly before letting it go, but couldn’t meet her eyes. Buffy found herself longing for her mother, just to hear her voice… But talk about complications. There was no way she could see her mom in this state, not without spilling her guts like the scared little girl she felt like inside. Bringing this Joyce a whole boat load of worry and fear she didn’t need during her recovery. Taking a deep breath she willed herself to stay calm. There was work to do.

*And a Slayer’s job is never done. Not until SHE is anyway.*

She thought morosely. Pushing the bad thoughts away from her, she looked up at Giles expectantly.

“ So where do we start?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was one of the most exhausting afternoons ever. Buffy felt totally drained of all energy and motivation. All she wanted now was to climb into her narrow dorm bed and cry herself to sleep. But there was still so much to do. Between her prophecy dream and forays into alternate Universes the research seemed endless. Willow had theories, Giles had probabilities – but no one seemed to have any answers. At 5 o’clock she couldn’t take it anymore, she just needed out of here for a while. She excused herself for a coffee run and nobody asked any questions.

It was so good to be outside, to feel free for a little while. She closed her eyes and breathed in the crisp scent of the evening air, beginning to relax just the tiniest bit. Buffy strolled downtown taking in the seemingly familiar sites. It was getting harder and harder to believe that this wasn’t really her home, her world. She was already starting to forget the little differences. Like was the coffee place always the Espresso Station? Wasn’t it something else? She honestly couldn’t remember. She pulled the gang’s drink order from her pocket, looking it over.

*Latte for Will. Red Eye for Anya. Hot Chocolate for Xander.*

She couldn’t help smiling a little at that one.

*Same Old Xand.*

Maybe she should pick up something besides doughnuts while she was out. She rounded a corner past the theater lost in thought and almost ran into someone.

“Spike!”

She said, startled.

*Shit!*

She was so not prepared for this. I mean she knew he was around, had been kinda wanting to seek him out actually. But now that he’d materialized in front of her she was lost. What would he say to her? What would she say to HIM?!

“ Buffy.”

He said, perfectly indifferent. Not Slayer, she noted – just Buffy.

“ W-What are you doing here?”

She managed to stammer out. He looked her over coolly, the very picture of nonchalance.

“Just waiting for the Slayer to show up.”

It was truly stunning how much that upset her.

*The Slayer?!?*

“ Why?” She snarked, covering her hurt. “ Got a hot date?”

He quirked an eyebrow at her, his jaw tightening imperceptibly.

“As a matter of fact. Yeah.”

He turned and smiled with pleasure, but not at her. Faith sauntered up casually, a lurid picture in black leather. She was wearing tight leather pants, a slinky red shirt that looked painted on, a studded belt and high-heeled biker boots. The girl looked like a walking felony.

*Just what Spike would go for.*

She thought irritably.

“ Hey, Baby.”

Faith purred, shooting Spike a saucy smile and launching herself into his arms. He grinned wolfishly.

“ There’s my girl.”

He wrapped his arms around the Slayer and kissed her deeply. Buffy could only stand and gawk as her brain completely flat lined. When they finally came up for air, Faith turned to smile at her.

“ Oh, Hey B. How ya doin’?”

Buffy searched for the appropriate answer among her frozen synapses.

“ Fine.”

Faith nodded agreeably, seemingly unaware of her predicament.

“ Cool. Any breakthroughs on that whole AU sitch?”

Buffy shook her head numbly.

“ No, not yet.”

“ That’s too bad.”

Faith leaned back into Spike comfortably.

“ Yeah.”

Buffy could only stare in horrified fascination at the scene before her, almost frozen with shock. It was one thing to hear about something terrible, but another thing all together to actually WITNESS it. It was like a car crash - she couldn’t look away.

“ So, how’s your boy?”

Faith asked casually. Spike looked bored and studied his nails, one arm still wrapped protectively around her waist. Buffy wanted to slap his hand away, but shoved her own hands deeply into her pockets instead.

*Not my Spike.*

She reminded herself, trying to stay steady.

“ He’s fine.”

Faith wrapped her arm around Spike’s neck, nuzzling.

“ Sweet. We should hang out soon. Go dancin’ or somethin’ - talk about the old times.”

*Oh, and wouldn’t THAT just be a hoot?*

“Yeah.”

Spike’s boredom seemed to have reached a breaking point.

“ I hate to bust up the party, Pet – but we really should be goin’.”

He untangled himself from her arms and moved to walk away, patting her rump affectionately.

“ Yeah, we should. Sorry, B. Can’t keep the vamps waitin’. ”

Spike reached back for Faith’s hand without looking, as if he simply expected it to be there.
Somehow this was one of the most devastating things Buffy had seen in the past two days.

“ Sure.”

She said limply.

“ Catch ya later though?”

Faith grabbed Spike’s hand which he took hold of instantly, possessively. It made her stomach hurt.

“ Yeah.”

Faith waved as they walked away, holding hands like the lovers they were.

“ Great, B. Take it easy. Call me if ya get any info.”

Spike never turned around once. And she realized that this was the least amount of words they had exchanged. Ever. He hardly seemed to register her presence at all in fact.

“ Sure. Bye.”

She said quietly, feeling sick.

And she stood there watching as what used to be her life walked away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy stared after them until they had long faded from her view. Standing alone in the spotlight of a streetlamp she felt the tears overflow and simply surrendered. There was no way she could hope to contain them at this point. There was too much hurt - too much fear and confusion to hold back. Her chin started to wobble and she turned from the light to find some semblance of privacy. If she was going to have a breakdown she didn’t want to do it in the street.

Ducking into the alleyway beside the Espresso Station she turned her face to the rough stone wall and cried. She wept out her confusion at being cast into this crazy world where NOTHING was right. She sobbed over the loss of her sister and of Spike – who knows if she’d ever get them back? And she needed them both so much. She’d been rocked by the unexpected loss of her sister. And she’d never felt more bereft in her life than the moment Spike walked away with Faith.

She felt so alone right now, so terribly alone. She knew she still had the Scoobies, her Mom and Giles, but the people that she felt the closest to were out of her reach - maybe forever. And that was only the beginning of this nightmare. As if it weren’t enough to be cast away into Bizarro World - DEATH was breathing down her neck now. The real kind you didn’t come back from. She was staring down the barrel of the big dirt nap - and that scared her more than she could even put into words.

Spike once told her that she was just a little bit in love with death, that it was part of being a Slayer. Maybe that was true, sometimes she felt drawn to a darkness that seemed to call her name. And at times the burdens of her work felt like too much to bear. But now that she was faced with it, it was the LAST thing in the world she wanted. There was still so much life ahead of her! She didn’t want to miss a moment of it – she wanted to spend more time with Mom, help her get well again. She wanted to see Dawn grow up, to find out what genius career Willow ended up in, and play Auntie to Anya and Xander’s kids… God, how could she miss all that? Her breath hitched as her tears began to dry up little by little.

And then there was Spike. HER Spike was waiting for her, and there was definitely something between them. He’d been irritatingly right again. That thought made her smile. He was an annoyingly perceptive little bastard, wasn’t he? She never realized how much she relied on him until recently – how much she needed him. Now that he was effectively gone she couldn’t deny it. What she wouldn’t give to just talk to him… He had a way of making everything alright. He always reassured her with out making her feel weak, and if he were here right now he’d be doing everything in his power to help her. She found that comforting. Maybe her Spike was in their world doing just that. If he knew she was missing he’d do whatever he had to to bring her back. Buffy smiled again, a little steadier this time. He loved her. Her smile widened. And she…well, she somethinged him. Maybe not love…

*Not yet at least.*

But something.




** Now that wasn't so bad was it? It's all part of my sinister plan, my evil has a purpose, you know. Have a little...trust. ;) You're going to luuuuvv the next chapter. Out next week. I'm going to crawl back in my bed and die till then. *hack* *weeze**cough* **
Chapter Twenty Five ~ A Fine Romance by Soul of the Rose
**C'mon get happy, people - It's the end of the angst! (Or at least a reprieve...) Here's a bright, cheery little chapter just for you. Snappy dialogue and delightful Riley bashing coming your way...enjoy!**




Chapter Twenty Five ~ A Fine Romance

“ A fine romance with no kisses. A fine romance, my friend this is.
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes.
But you’re as cold as yesterday’s mashed potatoes.
A fine romance, you won’t nestle.
A fine romance, you won’t wrestle.
I might as well play bridge with my old maiden aunts.
I haven’t got a chance, this is a fine romance.”

~ Ella Fitzgerald


Buffy dried her eyes on the sleeve of her jacket and smoothed out her hair, calming down now. She snuffled away the last of her tears and straightened her clothes - preparing to fill their orders and get back to the Magic Box. There was still work to do, and she wasn’t about to give up. Not when she had so much to lose. Dawn and Spike belonged to her and she was damn well going to fight for them. There had to be a way to get her back home and defeat Glory that didn’t end in her death.

Feeling better and freshly determined she stepped from the shadow of the alley and into the warmth of the small café. It was bright and cheery inside bolstering her mood even more. It only took a minute to place their drink order and she filled her wait time with a thorough examination of the glass pastry case. Buffy had just added on some turtle brownies, lemon bars and biscotti when she was startled by a heavy tap on the shoulder.

She spun around to see the lunk towering over her.

“Riley!”

“ Hi, Honey.” He smiled brightly at her, obviously pleased to see her. She wished she could say the same. Pulling her in for a hug he said, “ It’s great to see you.”

*And my night just keeps getting better and better.*

She plastered on a fake smile for his benefit.

“ You too.”

“ What’re you doing here? I thought you were busy tonight.”

He asked, looking puzzled.

“ Oh, I am. Just gettin’ some coffee, taking a little break.”

She replied quickly.

“ Big study session?”

“ Yeah-huh. The biggest.”

Buffy nodded vigorously. The clerk called out for a pick-up of her order and Riley eyed the multiple coffee drinks and large bag of goodies suspiciously.

“ That can’t be for just you and Willow…”

Buffy looked down at the drink carrier and paper sack in her hands and laughed nervously.

“ Oh no, of course not. It’s for…for…” her brain refused to work for a moment – then aha!
“ For our study group. For History class. We’ve got a project due you know.” Could she improvise or what?

“ Oh, well – of course.” He smiled with apparent relief. And somehow she just knew what he was thinking – he was afraid she was doing late night research with the gang. And he didn’t want his sweet little fiancée involved with that anymore did he? An angry spurt of resentment surged into her belly. “ Glad you’re being so studious and taking your grades seriously this semester.” He added.

Had he always sounded this condescending? How had she missed that exactly? Buffy stifled the urge to shove a biscotti where it would do the most good and smiled winningly at him instead.

“ Thanks for your support, Sweetie. But I really have to be getting back now. Looks like an all-nighter.”

She tried to look apologetic. Riley appeared somewhat stunned by her dazzling display of teeth. Well, she had given him her famous1000 kilowatt no-boy-can-resist-it smile.

*I am so good.*

Buffy thought smugly. She planted a quick peck on his cheek and headed towards the door.

“ I’ll call you later though,’kay?”

“ O-okay, Buffy. Goodnight then.”

“ “Night!”

She called over her shoulder waving cheerily. And she rounded the corner and headed back to the shop as quickly as she could, considering the whole thing a VERY near miss. She settled out of her brisk trot into a steady walk and began to breathe normally again. It was getting harder and harder to talk to Riley these days. She wanted to blame it on this whole alternate Universe mess but she knew it started long before that. They’d been having problems for months now. The worst thing was that they never talked about it. He wouldn’t open up to her unless she broke him down with relentless questioning. She had to drag anything she wanted to know out of him kicking and screaming. It was becoming obvious that he didn’t trust her, and never had. Thinking back she could see how he questioned her and her motives over and over. It was also becoming clear how seriously insecure he was – he doubted her love and commitment from almost the beginning.

Look at how he’d responded to her relationship with Angel – and to Angel himself for that matter. (Not that Angel had handled that whole mess any better.) And then there was how he reacted to Spike – could he possibly be more aggressive? Jeeze! She could chalk it up to some subconscious sense of their mutual (ahem) attraction, but she really thought it was more than that. She rooted around in the bag for a cookie and then munched on it thoughtfully as she walked.

The truth was that Riley lived in a black and white world. Spike was a demon, Angel was a demon and demons = evil in Riley Land. End of discussion. (And how many times had she heard that little expression?!) Buffy rolled her eyes with annoyance. Riley’d said that to her at least a hundred times – anytime he didn’t want to talk anymore. So pretty much every time they talked about anything real or important. He said it so much you’d think it was the latest catch phrase sweeping the nation. She sighed with frustration and crunched down on her chocolate chip biscotti.

He was annoyingly narrow-minded. And it wasn’t just about demons. Everything seemed to fit into his black and white worldview. And talk about controlling! He had her entire life planned out here – and her own Riley was no better. How many times had he told her what to do, or what she needed? How many times had he preached to her about right and wrong? Ethics? Manners?

“Arg!”

The truth was staring her right in the face. He really was Captain America. (Thanks, Spike). And she was damn sick of it. It was like he was born into the wrong era. He shoulda been a G-Man in the 50’s. Hell, he was thisclose to McCarthy era politics anyway. Before you know it he’ll be spoutin’ off about commies and building a bomb shelter. That made her giggle.

*Hey, I actually learned something in History class! Go, Buffy!*

Wouldn’t Willow be proud? Buffy smiled brightly, feeling pleased with herself. But then she remembered the train of thought that led her here.

*Bleah. Riley.*

Where was she again? Oh yes, sick to death of his crap. His narrow-minded, preachy, condescending, self-righteous, shutdown, insecure CRAP. He’d finally worn her down, she’d had enough.

Honestly, if this is normal?

Who needs it?!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She walked back into the Magic Box in a much better mood than she’d left it.

“ Who has a sweet tooth?” she called cheerily “ I come bearing chocolatey goodness.”

She set her haul down on the research table smiling. Xander dove into the large paper sack greedily.

“ Ooo, chocolate chip cookie-things.”

He dug one out of the bag and began munching away.

“ They’re biscotti, you heathen.”

Buffy said, raising an eyebrow at him.

“ All I know is they make my mouth happy.”

He smiled back at her beatifically. Willow snagged a rich looking brownie dripping with caramel.

“ You got brownies?!” she exclaimed with glee. “I vote we send Buffy on ALL the snack runs.”

Xander looked offended.

“ Hey! I am the Snack Master here, there shall be no other.”

Buffy patted his shoulder in consolation.

“ Don’t worry, Xand. I wasn’t gonna quit my day job to become ‘Buffy the Munchie Slayer’.”

He ducked his head in a dignified manner.

“Good. As long as we’re clear.”

Buffy pulled up a chair next to Willow and pulled her mochaccino out of the carrier.

“ So, any new developments?”

She asked, barely daring to hope.

“ Actually there was something…” Willow looked down at her notes briefly then back up at Buffy.“ Did you say that Faith never appeared in your dream?”

The Slayer nodded.

“ That’s right.”

Willow frowned, contemplating the paper in front of her.

“ And Dawnie did?”

That faint hope was growing now in Buffy’s chest.

“ Yes.”

Willow nodded and flipped through the pages of the yellow legal pad she was holding.

“ Did you get any sense of her actually being your sister? Like did you notice her hair? You said her hair was different here…”

Buffy’s eyes went wide as understanding struck her.

“ Oh my God – I was back there...” she gasped covering her mouth with her hand.

“ In my dream – I was home.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“ That’s what we’re thinking, yeah. I went over my notes a few times and it’s the only thing that makes sense – based on the information you gave us.”

Willow chewed thoughtfully on her pencil and began flipping through the pages of her legal pad again, scowling. Buffy felt like jumping for joy.

*Finally a freakin’ break!*

“ Why aren’t you more excited about this? Guys, come on!” She was practically bouncing in her chair. Oh, to be home again! To see Mom, to hug Dawn and to… something Spike. She grinned at the thought. Nothing would make her happier right now.

“ Well, I’d like to be – but we still have no idea how you get there. Heck, we don’t even know how ya got HERE. And I’ve just about exhausted the resources I have, there’s still no answers and it’s not like Giles is being any help…” Willow frowned petulantly.

“ I heard that. I am right in the room you know.” Giles looked up at her from his spot by the register. Willow shot him an apologetic smile.

“ I’m sorry, Giles, I’m just frustrated. This is the craziest thing we’ve ever come up against.”

“ And that’s saying something.” Xander interjected.

“Indeed.” Giles began polishing his glasses as if on cue, stepping out from behind the counter. “ And I’m afraid my books aren’t of any use in this case. Everything I have references inter-dimensional travel at most.”

“ So we can send you into a wacky Hell dimension.” Xander smiled at Buffy winningly, aiming for good humor.

“ Or the world without shrimp.” Anya piped up.

“ But not home.” Willow said quietly. “ I’m sorry, Buffy. We just don’t know anything yet.” She gave her friend a regretful look then began flipping through the books in front of her once more. “ Magic maybe? Or the going to the Watcher’s Council?” Seeing Buffy’s horrified expression she backtracked. “ Or not. No Watcher’s Council. Bad, bad idea. I just don’t want you to be stuck here – and we’re running out of options… Erg!” She ran an aggravated hand through her already-tousled strawberry locks. “ We’re spoiled, that’s what it is. We’re just so used to finding the answers we need here. A problem comes up and we go runnin’ to the books. Then wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am,” She slapped her hand on the table for emphasis. “ There it is all solutiony.”

“ You’re right, Wil. We need to think outside the box.” Xander made a wide box-shaped gesture.

“ Yeah, but how?” Buffy rose from the table and began pacing. “I mean, when there’s a new Big Bad in town I’m the go-to girl. Gimme danger. But I don’t have the first clue about inter-diwhatsinal traveling, Universe hopping or…or any of it!”

She stopped and threw up her hands in exasperation. Xander patted her shoulder in a conciliatory way.

“ Don’t be so hard on yourself, Buffster. You research with the best of ‘em.”

“ I give it the old college try at least.” Buffy shot him a sideways smile. “But this is making me insane-o girl!” She turned to her Watcher. “ Giles, I need something I can slay here. Or at least, I need to slay SOMETHING." She looked at him pleadingly. “ Maybe I could get some info. out on patrol…”

“ We’ve already discussed this, Buffy. There are things it would be best for Faith not to know. Particularly if she is as potentially dangerous as you say. And if she were to see you… I’m sorry, but I do think it’s important we maintain normal conditions here.” He smiled at her apologetically. “Well, as normal as possible at any rate.”

Buffy sighed with frustration and pent-up energy. If she didn’t kill something soon…

“ Okay. I get it. I don’t like it, but I get it.”

She’d slipped unconsciously into her best pouty face. Giles took it as a warning that tempers were wearing thin.

“ Perhaps we should call it a night then. Resume our strategizing in the morning?”

“ Who knows, maybe we’ll have a breakthrough by then.” Xander was ever hopeful.

“ Maybe.” Buffy smiled at him distractedly.

“ You okay, Buff?” He asked, concerned.

“ Yeah, just a little restless. You know I’m all proactive gal.”

“ A little less conversation, a little more action?” Xander quoted, with just a touch of Elvis.

Buffy gave him a real smile this time.

“ Exactly.”

“ Think of it as a mini-vacation.” He draped a casual arm around her shoulders.

“ All slay and no play makes Buffy a dull girl?” she quipped. It was his turn to smile now.

“ Exactly.” He gave her a playful squeeze. “ You could use this time to spend with Riley. I mean I know he’s not exactly your Riley, but you do still love the guy, right?”

*SO skirting this issue.*

“ Right.” She gave him a bright faux smile.

*If only the right guy were available for a play date…*

She thought, remembering a certain set of cool, strong hands, his sweet, wet mouth and rock solid-

“ Buffy?” Willow called.

“ Yeah huh?” She felt a bit flushed. “ Sorry, just spaced out for a minute. Guess I actually do need some sleep.”

“ I shouldn’t wonder, after last night.” Giles looked concerned.

“ I was just asking if you wanted me to walk home with you. I’m planning on going to Tara’s, but it’s right on the way.” Willow also looked worried.

Buffy gave them a reassuring smile.

“ No, really – I’m fine guys. A little alone time will do me some good. Got a lot to think about right now.”

“ Of course.” Giles smiled back at her kindly. “ Do be careful though. Glory and her minions are still about, not to mention the various other vampires and demons Sunnydale has to offer.”

“ I know, don’t worry. I’ll give the bad guys a wide berth tonight.”

She did her best to sound sincere.

“ I promise.”



** Nahnahnahnah, hey hey hey, goodbye...say so long to Riley (and the Biley portion of our story.) I know you hated it - but at least I didn't subject you to the wretched, drawn out 'love' scenes like Joss did in the show. *shudder* And while we're on the subject why couldn't he have done the same for Spike and Buffy? But no, we get 60 second shots to enjoy the sweet Spuffy lovin' and have to settle for freeze framing the DVD's just to get a good look at Spike's drool-worthy...nevermind. I don't do that. No sir. Uh uh, not me. (Ahem) Anyway, more goodies to come. We're just getting to the good part, Folks. You're really gonna love the next few chapters. :D More to come tuesday or wednesday at the latest. xoxoxoxox Rosie

PS- Thanks for all your wonderful reviews and well-wishes. You guys rock - I *heart* you all deeply. *snuggles of affection to all* ~ R.**
Chapter Twenty Six ~ I'm Beginning to See the Light by Soul of the Rose
** More angst-free goodness coming your way. Gauranteed to give you a happy. enjoy :) **


Chapter Twenty Six ~ I’m Beginning to See the Light

“ I used to ramble through the park, shadow boxing in the dark –
Then you came and lit the spark that’s a four-alarm fire now.
I never cared much for moonlit skies; I never winked back at fireflies.
But now that the stars are in your eyes, I’m beginning to see the light.
I never made love by lantern shine; I never saw rainbows in my wine.
But now that your lips are burnin’ mine, I’m beginning to see the light.”

~ Bobby Darin



Buffy left the Magic Box feeling wound up and restless – ready for action, with none to be had.

“ No patrolling tonight?” She grumbled kicking at a loose bit of gravel in her path. “And just HOW am I supposed to sleep exactly?”

Maybe she’d get lucky and get attacked on the way home.

“ Yeah!”

She grinned happily thinking about it, picturing an entire pack of demons descending on her.

*Ooo! Or maybe a vampire gang?*

Her hands just itched for a stake. This was the longest she’d gone without a fight in four years, and she was feeling seriously deprived. She found it wasn’t a sensation she enjoyed. She hated not being the Slayer anymore. It made her feel stripped of her power and pushed aside. In a way she supposed she was. No matter that it was her own choice that got her here.

*Or A Buffy’s choice anyway.*

How the woman put up with it, she’d never know. Now here she was, having to fulfill that role, play the good girl. And she never was very good at making with the obedience. Being told not to do something only made her want to do it more.

*Ya think Giles would’ve figured that out by now.*

She chuckled to herself at that. Who was he kidding? She was ALWAYS gonna patrol tonight. You can’t keep a good Slayer down – and Faith or no Faith she had work to do. Vamps to kill, demons to slay…frustrations to work out. (Ahem) And she was developing a serious hate-on for Faith again. Not like it was a stretch. Even if this Faith hadn’t done all of those things, Buffy had no doubt that she was capable – of all that and more. She knew it was only a matter of time for this one to snap too.

*You can take the girl outta the psycho, but never the psycho outta the girl.*

It didn’t help her case any watching Faith hanging all over HER Spike. Buffy let out an unconscious little growl at that. She knew she was in another place, not her own – but nothing could stop the territorial feelings she had where her people were concerned.

She knew exactly what she wanted, and once she made up her mind about something; stand the hell back. Nothing was gonna get in her way. Not Riley, not Faith - not even a skanky Hell god with permanent brain fry. And no way some freaky magickal glitch was gonna steal her life from her either. “Retired” or not, she was still the fucking Slayer and she was gonna fight for what was hers.

And that included Dawn AND Spike, dammit. Seeing him with Faith like that was just about more than she could take. And it finally drove home the truth she’d been denying all this time.

*Years even.*

She wanted Spike. Buffy said it aloud, trying it on for size;

“ I want Spike.”

There, that wasn’t so bad. It felt kinda good actually. Try it again:

“ I want Spike. I do. I. Want. Spike.”

Plain as day. Here was the truth from her own mouth. And she’d spent all that time fighting this why? ‘Cause now that she said it, it felt good, right – freeing.

*Huh. So there really is something to that whole truth-will-set-you-free thing. Who knew?*

Buffy felt more relaxed than she had in years. Was it the thought of finally being with Spike? Or just the fact that she wasn’t being repress-o girl anymore? All that holding back required an awful lot of energy she’d discovered. She was almost giddy with relief. The ten-ton weight she’d been carrying around her neck was gone.

She was through lying to herself. No more trying to squeeze into a mold someone else made for her, no more whining, no more crying and best of all:

*No more Riley.*

Oh yeah. They were going to have a loooong talk when she got back. (if she got back?) And then it was bye bye, birdie. Nothing but sweet Spikey goodness from now on. Buffy headed towards Stevenson Hall, smiling.

It was still odd to be back in the dorms, but she was getting used to it again. At least here she knew AU Joyce was getting better and didn’t need her. It gave her hope that her own mother would recover as well. She unlocked the door to her room with a quiet click and looked around at the mess in front of her.

*This place is a disaster – no wonder I’m feelin’ all comfy.*

There had been no time to tidy up in the past two days (God, had it only been TWO?). They’d all been in full research mode since she got to this crazy place. Buffy stared at the debris strewn around her side of the room and sighed. She was so not in the mood to clean. (But when was she ever?) Mom never let her slack at home, but when left to her own devices chaos reigned. She settled for gathering all her dirty clothes into a laundry basket and hiding it in her closet and shoving the huge heap of schoolbooks under the bed.

*There all better.*

She smiled at her clever cleaning solution and flopped down on the now-uncluttered bed, feeling tense and twitchy. She needed to get out on rounds soon. If anyone asked she was just out walking and thinking things through. No one would doubt that after tonight’s meeting hopefully. God, when was the last time she’d had to cover up her patrolling? Junior year? She couldn’t believe she was back here again. Buffy sighed and got up to change her clothes. Her mind was buzzing with images of Faith and Spike together along with thoughts of Riley and his manly smothering. Then there were flashbacks from her nightmare just for extra fun. It was truly heinous.

“ Well, nothing like a little bloodshed to cure what ails you.”

She smiled with sinister humor and pocketed several stakes, grinning in anticipation as she headed out into the night

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike woke with a start, his breath catching in his throat. He gulped unnecessary air, feeling suddenly suffocated.

*Another bloody dream.*

About the Slay… about Buffy. Dammit why was it always BUFFY? For years now she’d haunted him. Seemed like everywhere he turned there she was – still! And she wasn’t even the actual Slayer anymore – but try getting his mouth to say that. He’d almost slipped up today, seeing her. And it was a damn good thing Faith liked being called ‘Slayer’ in bed – or he’d probably be dust by now. She didn’t like to share her toys – a mere hit of a ‘ Bu - ’ and he’d fit neatly into an ashtray.
Jealous little thing she was – and jealous of Buffy most of all. Privately Spike thought that havin’ the position as the one and only Slayer was the lone thing keepin’ her from goin’ ‘round the bend.

*Do not pass go. Do not collect two hundred dollars.*

That and the Bit. Dawn helped keep her grounded, gave her something to live for, to fight for. Gave him something to keep going for too. She was one of the few people on this earth Spike had ever loved. Her and Buffy – and long ago his own family. But he never loved Faith. He picked up a smoke from the pack on the nightstand and lit it, thinking. At first he’d found her right attractive. Put him in mind of Dru in a way, ‘cept she had all that excellent rage and strength. Faith was so fierce, so wild; she was a white hat with a bad girl streak a mile wide. How could he resist? He thought he’d found his perfect match at last – as if Buffy was just a phase he was going through, a mad schoolboy crush he’d be soon to forget. Spike snorted taking a long, slow drag. How naive he’d been.

They’d cut a brutal swath through the demon population of Sunnydale in the beginning – bashing and shagging for all they were worth. It was a beautiful thing, the closest he’d felt to his old self since that buggering chip was implanted. And he was content for a while. He had his kills; he had a wild warrior woman in his bed. It seemed like enough at the time… But all too soon a sense of dreadful emptiness crept in, a sense of something missing. But what? He just couldn’t figure it out.

And then the dreams started. Vivid tableaus of he and Buffy fighting, fucking, loving each other. He hadn’t seen their like since he first realized he was in love with her. In bits and pieces they told him everything he did not want to know. That Faith was vacant, that this is all she was and all she could offer. An empty lay in an empty crypt. They showed him all the ways she wasn’t Buffy, and never would be. In the end Faith had only served to demonstrate to him what he really wanted, but could never have. What a priceless cosmic joke.

He sighed and ground out his cigarette fiercely. And there was Buffy still, a golden goddess dancing just out of his reach. Always enticing, always enchanting but never near enough to touch. And now she was happy, living the life she deserved. Away from all this bloodshed, from him and his kind – in the light where she belonged. Maybe Peaches’d known what he was on about for once. She met a normal guy, went to college – was about to get married, the whole nine. Even if it was to Finn.

*The useless cunt.*

He spat. And don’t think that little announcement didn’t give him a nasty turn. She was getting married. Then she’d graduate and leave, move to Nebraska or Idaho or somewhere, have fine fat babies and grow old. With someone else. It broke his heart into dry, jagged little pieces. He’d gone on a week-long bender. Faith never asked him why. He suspected on some level she already knew, but didn’t want to end their little charade. As long as he kept up the pretense… And sad bastard that he was, he did. ‘Cause Faith was better than nothing, right? Better than pining over Buffy full-time and tossing off in the exile of his loneliness.

*Ya waster.*

So here he was, stuck with a girl he didn’t love. Loving a girl he couldn’t have. Some days he just prayed for death. Couldn’t go on like this much longer. Seeing Buffy again like that made it plain. He’d felt his heart leap into his throat. It was all he could do not to grab her and kiss her the way he longed to, not to fall to his knees and beg her to run away with him. He’d willed his mouth shut, saying as little as possible. And then he’d practically used Faith as a human shield, keeping her between him and Buffy at all times. He could hardly stand to look at her. The sight of her hurt his heart. He was just grateful she didn’t come ‘round much anymore. She stayed away from the cemeteries these days. Had better things to do.

*Unlike me.*

“God enough! Enough!”

He’d had it with his own pathetic shite. Sitting here in the dark obsessing over Buffy. Again.

*Better watch it, Mate. You’re this far from becoming a bleedin’ bunny-boiler.*

His little catnap had done nothing to soothe his nerves. For some reason, the past two days the dreams had been worse than ever. He needed to get his undead arse out of this hellhole and get in a few good kills. That’d fix him right up. Nothing like a spot of violence to clear a man’s head. Spike got out of bed and pulled on clothes from the discarded pile on the floor. It was time he got out on his own anyway. He’d patrolled with Faith every night this week. If he spent any more time with the girl they’d be living together. He shuddered visibly at the thought.

Maybe it was time to cool it off a bit, put a little distance between them. Hell, maybe it was time to get out of Sunnydale for that matter. Take a nice long road trip – or go back to London, clear his head. He couldn’t hunt like he used to, but he’d make his way. He always did. This was sounding better and better. Get the hell outta Dodge, ease up with the little woman, get some space from Buffy.

“ Yeah. Bloody brilliant.”

Spike smiled genuinely for the first time all day. He headed up to the upper level of his crypt and out into the night, whistling.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy walked alone through the midnight silence of Shady Glen cemetery, her brain on over-drive, trying to process the events of the past week.

*I mean, could things be any weirder?*

Hardly. She was trapped in an alternate Universe where her sister wasn’t her sister, her boyfriend was her fiancé and Faith seemed to be living what was rightfully Buffy’s life. There she was out on patrol

*(Or screwing Spike into the ground!!!)*

(Growl) Doing all the things she wanted to do. With the people she wanted to be doing them with. She knew he wasn’t her Spike, but that green eyed little monster was still there. It was probably better if she avoided contact with Faith while she was here. Wouldn’t want any unforeseen "accidents" to happen… Buffy grinned evilly at that.

She knew she should feel bad about Riley, but she just couldn’t bring herself to. It was over and she knew it, and all she could feel about that was profound relief. Other Buffy might want to marry the guy – Lord knows why. She only knew that this Buffy didn’t want that. Riley was a good man in his own way – but something was just plain missing. She didn’t know what it was exactly; it was just something she felt intuitively. What they had was good for awhile – but it wasn’t enough. She needed…

*What?*

Passion maybe. Somebody that made her feel alive. Someone that lit her up from the inside that she couldn’t wait to see. Someone that would know everything about her and love her, the very worst parts of her - not in spite of that, but because of it. Someone who could love her Slayerness – the light and dark of her. Who could celebrate it, revel in it with her. Because she was finally getting that. She had discovered recently that she loved her calling and loved that part of herself. Feeling strong and powerful, and being able to wield that power - well, it felt damn good. Spike was right (which was happening annoyingly often lately.) She loved it, and now she wanted someone who would love it too.

*And I have a good idea who that someone might be…*

Riley was not that someone. Never had that been illustrated more clearly than at dinner the other night. He was so, so glad that she was retired. He had every aspect of their quite little life planned down to the last detail. And none of it included slaying, or vampires; she could even see how he planned her friends right out of her life. He really didn’t want her to have anything to do with the supernatural world in any way. She couldn’t believe he would retire from the Initiative like that. But he was bound and determined she would have everything she deserved. And apparently he was the ONLY one who knew what that was.

It made her feel so suffocated. She didn’t know how other Buffy could stand it. She was just glad she was getting out of here soon.(Hopefully maybe?) Other Buffy would have to figure it out on her own. She was just going to keep her head down and try not to do anything crazy like -

“ Spike.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damn. Why was she here? Why now? Just when he was startin’ to get his head on straight.

*Fuck.*

Alright, alright calm down. Act casual. Just try to get through this without doing anything stupid like…

“ Buffy.”

Yes, exactly like that. Appealing as that idea seemed at the moment. God, she looked gorgeous in the moonlight. Her hair became the palest gold and her skin…

*Bloody berk. Get hold of yourself!*

“ What’re you doin’ about this late? Thought you gave it all up for lent or some such.”

He gestured broadly to include the cemetery, himself and the night in general. Buffy shrugged non-comittally.

“ Yeah. Well – I just needed to think. Had a lot on my mind.”

God, he looked good. If James Dean and Sid Vicious had a love child he would look exactly like Spike. She wasn’t at all prepared for the effect his physical presence had on her. She caught herself staring at his wide, expressive mouth…remembering.

*Get a grip, Summers! This is not your Spike.*

But he looked like her Spike…she moved unconsciously closer. Did he smell like him too? Would he taste the same…feel the same? She drew nearer.

The Slayer was giving him a very interesting look right now. If he didn’t know better he’d think… But that was bloody looney. She was well ensconced in her happy little life. Practically a newlywed for fuck’s sake. Probably just wishful thinking on his part.

*Yeah, right…wishful.*

Buffy stalked slowly closer. Thinking about her Spike, forgetting just when it was that he’d become that. Missing him more than ever now that his replica was standing here – right within her reach. Her hands ached to touch him. Her lips to taste him. She thought of what it was she’d wanted to do to him that night. To take him in her mouth right then and there. She licked her suddenly dry lips.

Spike’s eyes widened at the sight of her little pink tongue skating across lustrous cherry lips. Damn. He was getting the vibe off this girl - hard. The stare down she was giving him - all hunger, all desire. He’d been around long enough to recognize "The Look " when he saw it. But for the unlife of him he couldn’t figure why. Why was Buffy, the future Mrs. Riley Finn, makin’ with the bedroom eyes all the sudden? She was getting him hard with that look. He swallowed reflexively. If she came on any stronger he would quickly cease to CARE why…

“ Buffy – what…?”

He found himself backing away from the intensity of her hungry gaze.

Somewhere deep in his cerebral cortex a battle was being waged. Two primal instincts were colliding. One identified himself as prey for the deadly predator currently stalking him. The urge for flight was strong. The other told him MATE is here, now. The urge to stay was stronger…

She was so close now. He could feel the heat of her skin from here. He wanted to warm himself against the blaze of it. Her heartbeat sounded fast and hard, as if she’d been running. But what was she running to? It pulsed steadily in his ears, seeming to drown out all else. He was losing himself, drowning in the visceral reality of her. He was about to lose control, with no earthly idea how things had gotten to this point. If she touched him, it was all over.

“ A-Are you okay, Love?”

He gave it one last try. He wasn’t sure whether he should be relieved or disappointed when she stopped advancing on him, seeming to snap out of the trance she was in. She looked like she’d forgotten where she was for a moment.

“ Oh, Spike…yeah. I’m okay.”

Buffy blushed. What the hell was she doing? Stalking Spike like some kind of crazed sex-maniac! Poor guy, no wonder he looked freaked. What was the matter with her? He had a girlfriend here – and it wasn’t her.

*Faith.*

She thought sickly. And he was obviously in love with her. Buffy backed off a few steps, feeling self-conscious and ill.

“I-I’m sorry about that. I was just…thinking about someone. You reminded me of him and, I guess I just got lost in thought for a moment. I must’ve looked pretty zoned out, huh?”

She stammered, hoping he wouldn’t guess just what she’d been thinking about. That it hadn’t been totally obvious she was two seconds away from devouring him whole like a cocktail olive.

“ Uh yeah. Right. No worries.”

He rubbed the back of his neck fretfully. Thinking of someone? Who? That reminded her of him? Someone that made her …like that. Bloody hell.

“ Lucky bastard…”

He muttered under his breath, starting to pace. He felt entirely pent up. Lit up and let down. The energy was buzzing through his veins. He really needed a kill now.

“ What was that?”

Buffy asked, irritation flaring into her tone. Her desire for him automatically sublimating itself. Old habits die hard.

“ Nothing.”

He continued to pace, ready to go on the hunt himself now.

“ It didn’t sound like nothing, Spike.”

She put her hand on her hip and raised an eyebrow at him expectantly. He sighed.

*Bloody bint never could let things go.*

“ It’s just that, you didn’t seem lost in thought exactly.”

His tone was careful. Hers was not.

“ Oh? And what did I seem like then?”

She wanted to pursue this? Fine. He faced her squarely.

“ You seemed like you were on the bloody prowl, Slayer.”

Her mouth formed an incredulous O.

“ Whatever, Spike. What would you know about it?”

She was starting to piss him off now.

“ What would I know? A hundred twenty years is what I know. I’ve seen every look there is – trust me. And I know the look you were just giving me.”

She scoffed openly.

“ Yeah? And what look is that?”

He circled her, leaning in intimately. Giving her back a taste of predatory stalking.

“ You looked at me like you wanted to devour my soul. Like you wanted to shag me into the sodding ground.”

His voice was a low rumble in her ear, making her shiver. She tried to sound convincing when she dismissed him this time.

“ You’re dreaming.”

He stood back, his arms crossed righteously.

“ Not this bloody time I’m not.”

He seemed so self-assured…wait - did he just admit to dreaming about her?

“ W-what does that mean?”

She stammered out, momentarily confused. Spike realized his slip and covered by interrogating her.

“ And who’s this fella you were thinkin’ about? The one that turns you into a bleedin’ cat in heat?”

He accused.

“ Not that it’s any of your business, but I was thinking of Riley.”

She tried to sound breezy and confident.

“ Finn? You were thinking of soldier boy?”

He laughed out loud.

“ What? I was!”

Buffy looked indignant. This only made him laugh harder.

“ You’re telling me I remind you of Captain Cardboard now?”

Damn. She’d forgotten that part.

“ Oh - that is … I mean. No.”

She chewed her thumbnail anxiously. Dead give away - he had her now. And he had a sneaking little suspicion about something…or was it just the tiniest bit of hope?

“ So which is it then, Princess? That you were thinking of Riley? Or you were thinking of someone else?” He leaned in close to whisper seductively in her ear;“ Or is it really that you were thinking of me?’

She was working up a really excellent retort when Spike abruptly fell to the ground.

Under the attack of an enormous vampire.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The thing was huge – had to be six foot six if it was an inch. Buffy just stood and goggled for a minute, taken completely off guard. Very un-Slayer like.

*Nice moves, Slick.*

She chastised herself, reaching at last for the stake tucked into her waistband. She moved to strike, but Spike was on top of it, vamped out and beating it down with all he was worth. A feral growl issued from his throat.

*Is it wrong to think that is WAY hot?*

He looked gorgeous right now, primal – full of power. It made her girly parts throb and tingle just watching him fight. She always did appreciate a man with skills. Spike was in full kill mode - giving an extremely dismayed vamp the thrashing of its unlife. It clearly thought they were easy targets, a nice quick meal.

*Moron.*

She thought, amused. Any vamp who didn’t have the presence of mind to recognize a master vampire and a Slayer deserves whatever it gets.

*Observe, Darwinism at work.*

She tossed Spike the stake at an opportune moment and watched him dust it with casual grace. She almost wanted to applaud, it was so artfully done. But she managed to contain herself. Spike got up from the kneeling position he was in, slapping the vamp dust from his hands.

He stood there grinning. The joy of the kill written all over his face. It was a look she recognized - a look she loved. She couldn’t help but smile back. He turned to her, all cock-sure swagger and self-satisfaction saying;

“ Now, Love – where were we?”

That’s when she kissed him.




** I cannot tell you the supreme delight I have taken in leading you all astray this whole time. For the record, not once did I actually SAY that Spike was in love with Faith. Go on, go check - I'll wait...See? Willow makes an assumption and you just went with it. I led you down the primrose path with sleight-of-hand and misdirection. I know, so very evil. *GRIN* You went right along so willingly too... Mwahahahahaha! All part of my sinister plot to give you a twisty and satisfying read. I must be stopped. Or at least spanked. ;p More sweet spuffy lovin' to come ( and some deeply graphic smut - oh, don't act like you don't love it.) Stay tuned true believers... xoxoxox Rosie**
Chapter Twenty Seven ~ Knock Me a Kiss by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
Didja miss me? I'm back :D The bad news is that I lost several chapters in "The Great Server Outage of '05" so it'll take me a bit to catch up again. The good news is that I have now responded to all of your reviews during the down time. Love you all to bits, thanks for hanging in there! New chappie should be up this weekend. *Snuggles to all* Rosie xoxoxox
** No smut this chapter - sorry guys. Just sweet, sweet Spuffness. Enjoy :) **



Chapter Twenty Seven ~ Knock Me a Kiss

“ I like cake, and no mistake. But, Baby, if you insist I’ll cut out cake, just for your sake.
Baby, come on – knock me a kiss. I like pie, I hope to die - just get a load of this.
When you get high, doggone the pie. Baby, come on - knock me a kiss.
When you press your lips to mine, t’was then I understood;
They taste like candy, brandy and wine, peaches, bananas and everything good.
I like jam, and no flim-flam, scratch that off my list. This ain’t no jam, the jam can scram.
Baby, come on – knock me a kiss.”

~ Louis Jordan



Spike staggered back under the assault, arms and mouth suddenly full of warm, sweet Buffy.
No time to think, only react. His body took over and did what came naturally - he kissed her back with everything he had. Months of dreaming, longing and frustration poured out of him and into that kiss. He felt her response building to match his until they were practically eating each other alive.

*So good, so good.*

She knew it was wrong. Wrong time, wrong place, wrong man. Not her man. But she just couldn’t help it, couldn’t stop the runaway train that carried her forward. It was like she was magnetized to his side. Didn’t matter, none of it mattered. He was here, now - he was everything she wanted. Faced with him she could no longer deny that she loved him, needed him, wanted him. All questions, warnings and consequences faded out like background noise until they stood inside a perfect silence.

“ Need you…”

She murmured.

“God, Buffy you have no idea.”

She smiled seductively.

“ Show me.”

He kissed her fiercely, possessively. His need for her a roaring empty ache inside him. The feel of her made him high. No drug he’d ever had compared to the slick sweetness of her mouth or the smoldering silk of her skin. He pulled her tight to him, craving contact. She burned him with her body heat, even through both sets of clothes. What he wouldn’t do to have nothing between them at this moment. His hands mindlessly sought her flesh. He wanted in, he wanted under – whatever it took.

He gasped when he felt her hands seeking him. And when they slid up under the free edge of his shirt he groaned, the skin-to-skin contact was almost too much. He pulled back to look at her, to confirm that she was real. That this was really happening. She smiled at him sweetly and touched his face, as if she knew what he was thinking. “ I’m here.” her eyes seemed to say. He wanted desperately to take her home. The two of them in private, with all the time in the world…

“ Buffy, could we…?”

He caught his breath, afraid of her answer.

“ Let’s go.” she said simply.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She took his hand firmly in her own, and his eyebrows rose up to meet his hairline.
Surprise # 599 for the night. Who WAS this girl? And what happened in the last 24 hours to give her such a change of heart toward him? He was stunned, but afraid to question his good fortune overmuch. They walked quietly back to his crypt, comfortably hand in hand. It was such a small, tender gesture – but it made him want to weep all the same. There were so many things he wanted to say right now. His head filled with a thousand questions, but he was terrified to speak lest he break whatever spell was at work here. He settled on silence.

*For the moment.*

Buffy felt high on his presence, the solid reassuring feel of his hand in hers. She hadn’t realized just how deprived she’d felt until tonight. It had only been a matter of a few days since she’d seen him – her Spike. But God, how everything had changed. Funny how everything you thought you knew could turn out to be so wrong. As wrong as wrong could be. And life – it could transform with dizzying speed.

This thing with Spike had been building for awhile. She’d just started to recognize that the night she “left”. Sooner or later she might have come around, realized what was right in front of her. Realized how she really felt, deep down inside… But more likely she would’ve clung stubbornly to Riley and all her stupid ideals. She knew how she could be when she got stuck on something. She decided it was so, and nothing but a giant catastrophe could change her mind. She shook her head, sighing at her own willfulness.

*Hey, it only took sending me to a whole ‘nother Universe to get it this time.*

Everything that happened since she got here had opened her eyes a little more. Each event stripping away the blindness and lies she wrapped herself in. Losing Dawn like that, knowing she might be stuck here and never get her back? It split her heart in two. Pile on having her status as Slayer stripped away, feeling useless and disempowered. She hated that feeling, it made her feel so vulnerable, so naked. And the final blow – actually seeing Faith with Spike. Ugh, it made her sick. Add a dash of overbearing Riley-ness and here she was, wide-awake in dreamland.

You couldn’t blame her for jumping on Spike really. Now that she knew, REALLY knew how she felt - she couldn’t hold it back. And she might never get back to her own world. She could be here forever, never having Dawn back. Never being a Slayer again. She needed the comfort only Spike could give her now. He was the only one she could lay her heart out to, knowing he would listen and not judge. Just like he always had. She shook her head again in disbelief. How had she missed that? All the ways he’d been there for her all this time.

*Duh, Buffy. Just duh!*

She clutched his hand tighter and rested her head on his shoulder as they walked. If she had to be here, at least she had this, had him. He was a find in any world, a treasure. Too bad it took her so long to see that. But all she could do now is make up for lost time. She looked up at him walking silently beside her. He looked overwhelmed, and no wonder. She was pretty whelmed herself. He looked back down at her and smiled gently, wonderingly at her. As if she were an angel newly materialized before his eyes – a miracle. In a way, she supposed she was.

Buffy realized she was going to have to tell him. She didn’t want to start anything they might have off with lies. Not to him. He had a right to know everything that was going on. And a right to make his own decision… She swallowed her fear down forcibly. What if he didn’t want her then? Knowing that she might only be a visitor here, that she might disappear on him. And if other Buffy came back she might not feel the same. God, this was complicated. She knew she’d have to tell Riley soon too. She just couldn’t stand another moment of being smothered by him. Just being around him felt suffocating lately. She dreaded that conversation, knew how hurt he would be.

But what else could she do? She had to be honest, and just deal with the repercussions.
She was stuck here, for who knows how long - maybe even forever. She just had to go with it. Fortunately, she was a flexible girl. Being a Slayer really taught you how to roll with the punches. And Buffy wasn’t about to get her ass kicked here.

Lost in her own thoughts, she was surprised how quickly they arrived at his door. The exact same crypt he was housed at in her world. Funny how so many little things were exactly the same. Like the look in his eyes right now, so eloquently telling her everything that was in his heart. Somehow she’d overlooked that too.

*More like blocked it out, stubborn bitch that I am.*

When he took her in his arms and kissed her she could not think for the life of her why. How had she denied herself this love? This passion? How had she denied herself him? From where she was standing now, it seemed like straight up insanity. She was so safe right now, so loved. There was nowhere else in any Universe she would rather be at this moment.

Spike kissed her gently, tenderly – the way he’d always wanted to. She was a sweet, solid weight in his arms. He felt complete and at ease for the first time ever. That hollow hungry feeling that had taken up residence under his breastbone these many years was suddenly gone. It was so right, so good – there just had to be a catch. Whatever it was, a spell, a hallucination, he was going to make the most of it for as long as he bloody could.

*Make hay while the sun shines an’ all that rot.*

He broke the kiss to pull her inside and up into his arms. He twirled her briefly and then kissed her again soundly. She laughed giddily, making him grin like an idiot. Luckily her own smile was just as goofy. Could it really be she felt the same? His eyes searched hers for an answer. She smiled down at him from her place in his arms and kissed him so tenderly, so sweetly – he thought his heart would turn to dust inside his chest.

That’s when she uttered the four most dreaded words for any man to hear;

“ We have to talk.”

*Uh oh.*

He set her down carefully.

*This can’t be good.*

** I know, I'm so mean - another cliffie. But at least I updated quickly this time. And who delivers the good ol' Spuff huh? More to come soon, Happy Campers :) *snuggles* Rosie xoxoxoxox **
Chapter Twenty Eight ~ But I Do Love You by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
Just a few more chapters to go until I get caught up. Thanks for stickin' it out, Guys. And much praise to BS Central where my story is also archived, complete with all my silly A/N's. I will miss my lost reviews though *sigh*
** A brand new chappie in honor of my b-day. Reviews are always a fantabulous gift incidentally. (Ahem) A little light smut, minor angst and lots of lovely Spuff. Enjoy :) **


Chapter Twenty Eight ~ But I Do Love You

“I don’t like to turn the radio on just to find I missed my favorite song.
And I don’t like to be the last with the news –
But I do love you, but I do love you.
I don’t like to be alone in the night.
And I don’t like to hear I’m wrong when I’m right.
And I don’t like to be the one with the blues –
But I do love you, but I do love you.”

~ Leanne Rimes


Buffy watched the look of fear transform his face and rushed to soothe it away.

“ Baby, no – don’t worry. I’m not leaving you.”

His face relaxed into relief.

“ At least I don’t think I am…”

And promptly crumpled into confusion.

“ Buffy what…? What’s goin’ on?”

*Did the Slayer just call me baby?*

His brain goggled at the thought. Buffy took his hands and sat him down on the battered plaid sofa in his living area. It was patched with duct tape, and very much worse for wear. It looked like AU Spike didn’t take as much pride in his home as hers did. Interesting… those little differences. She wondered momentarily what other discrepancies she might find…

“ Spike, I have a lot to tell you. Some of it you’re really not gonna like. But I don’t want to lie to you…”

He withdrew his hands from hers, scowling. She could see the defenses going up already.

“ Baby, please don’t be like that. You need to know this stuff. Besides I have good stuff to tell you too.”

She coaxed, rubbing his arm.

*She DID call me baby!*

He suppressed his smile, and gave her a dubious eyebrow instead.

“ Oh yeah? Like what?”

He was so cute when he pouted, she couldn’t help but smile at his childishness. She leaned in to kiss his pouty lip.

“ How ‘bout like: I’m in love with you?”

His face almost split open from the enormous grin this brought on. He pulled her onto his lap and kissed her breathless.

“ Do you know…” he panted in between kisses “ how long… I’ve waited to hear you say that ?!”

He squeezed her in a bear hug and kissed her neck and ears until she was giggling helplessly.

“ Um… a week?”

She teased when she regained her composure somewhat.

“No.”

He shot back, with a warning raise of his eyebrow.

She smiled slyly at him.

“ A month?”

He growled low into her ear, making her shiver.

“ Try again, Pet.”

“ Two months?”

She asked, all innocence.

He threw her onto her back with a roar, nuzzling her neck and nipping at her earlobe. Buffy shrieked and giggled, having the time of her life. He kissed her thoroughly, until she was quite chastened and said;

“ Try all my bloody life and more.”

And then kissed her again. Taking his time with it now – enjoying the soft fullness of her lips and the velvet slide of her tongue against his. She kissed him with such fire, it made him instantly hard. It was all he could do not to grind himself into her ferociously and tear her clothes off. But that wasn’t how he wanted their first time to be.

Buffy felt him hardening on her hip and was stirred to do something about it. She adjusted her body to fit neatly into his and wrapped her legs around him. He groaned into her shoulder and slid his hands along her outer thighs. She felt herself getting wet for him already. It took so damn little to make her want him.

Spike moved his hands to cup her luscious bum, wishing fervently for summer weather and short skirts. Then there would be nothing between them but a zipper and a pair of her tiny little panties. The thought made his cock throb.

*God, if only…*

Her eyes widened as she felt him pulse against her. He was so incredibly hard right now, and he wanted her so much. She tightened her legs around him and pressed herself up into his erection with a small hum of pleasure. He could smell her arousal and feel her damp heat against him.

Her response to him carried him right over the edge of his precarious control. He grasped her perfect little ass and pulled her tight as he ground into her with purpose, angling for the sweet spot. He felt her shudder and whimper beneath him and it spurred him on. They kissed hungrily as they writhed together on the couch like a couple of teenagers out past curfew on a Saturday night. It was bloody marvelous. He pulled back to unbutton her shirt, leaving her sheer shimmery bra exposed. He caught his breath at the most perfect breasts in creation. He moved to taste a dusky rose-colored nipple through the fabric and she cried out breathlessly.

*That’s it. Naked time. NOW.*

He sat back to pull off the duster and his black paisley shirt. When he got to his tight black t-shirt she stilled his hand.

“ Wait.”

He groaned inwardly.

*No, no, no. PLEASE no.*

He thought feverishly. Don’t let her stop now. He couldn’t take it if she turned him away. He was almost afraid to look in her eyes. Afraid he’d see the spell had suddenly ended. Then he’d be left alone without her again. He couldn’t bear it.

“ Baby, please – don’t think for one second that I don’t want to.”

She leaned forward and cupped his chin forcing him to meet her eyes.

“ I want you so much.”

The confession would have taken his breath, had he needed any. He looked into her eyes questioningly.

“It’s just that I need to tell you this stuff. Before we…go any farther.” She continued, curling up protectively on her end of the battered sofa. “ And after… You might not want to.”
She finished quietly. It was her turn to look away.

And he thought he was as shocked as he could possibly get already.

“ What on earth do ya think you could say that would possibly make me stop wanting you?!” He sat forward and held her shoulders gently in his hands. “ Buffy, you could be covered in the bloody pox and I’d still want you.”

She looked at him longingly, wanting to believe. He pulled her into his arms.

“ Hell, I’ll probably still be wanting you when you’re 102.”

That made her giggle a little and she snuggled into his chest. A wicked thought occurred to her.

“ What if I told you I switched bodies and I’m really Xander?”

He pulled back giving her a look of horror.

“ Ah! Don’t say such things, Love. You’ll put me off my breakfast.”

That made her laugh out loud. God, it was good to talk to him like this. Flinging around the casual banter, making each other laugh, teasing like they always had. She’d never realized until now what blatant flirtation that was. Well, now that she knew she was going to enjoy it to the fullest. She eyed him slyly.

“ Oh, C’mon you know you’ve always had a secret crush on Xander. That’s why you torment him so much. Typical boy maneuver.”

She taunted mercilessly. Spike gawked at her all wounded indignance.

“ Gah! No – never – more like the other way ‘round. That boy’s been givin’ me the eye since day one. And! - And he started it.”

Buffy chuckled giddily. She just loved riling him up. She grinned evilly and dug in his belly for a tickle.

“ Hey! Oi! Slayer…quit…”

He laughed helplessly, squirming. She was enjoying herself thoroughly and went for the kill swirling her finger in his navel. Spike let out a surprised squeak and broke down giggling.

*So it does work. How ‘bout that?*

It made her wonder if her dream really had been prophetic.

*Oooo – massages, yum! And oily, naked sex!*

Now that was the kind of prophecy a girl could get into. Buffy smiled happily, thinking of things to come. She stopped her tickle assault and settled down to lounge comfortably against his chest, content for the moment. He stroked her hair soothingly then asked her;

“ Hey, how’d you know about my secret spot? No one knows about that.”

“ Call it woman’s intuition.”

She smiled enigmatically.

“ So you are a woman then? I haven’t been snogging madly with Harris all night?”

He questioned teasingly.

“ No, Dork.” She snorted. “ It’s me - as if you wouldn’t know.”

“ I’d know you anywhere, Pet.”

He agreed, kissing the top of her head. He sighed, might as well get to it.

“ So - Are you ready to spill all your horrifyin’ secrets then?”

She looked up at him tentatively, questioningly.

“ You’re not worried now?”

He put on his best brave face.

“ What could be worse than makin’ out with Harris?”

He chuckled, smiling.

So she told him.


**Oh no! I did it again... Bad, bad Rosie. I am evil and wrong and must be punished (Please?) He he he... Before you all rebel on me, this is the last cliffie. Really. I mean it. You believe me right? Cause I would never, ever mislead you... But seriously, I promise to make them actually talk next chapter. Honestly. Trust me.... ;p *slightly innappropriate PDA to all* xoxoxox Rosie**
Chapter Twenty Nine ~ Never Tear Us Apart by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
Okay Campers, we're almost there - one more chapter and you're all caught up. A brand new chappie is just around the corner :D Thanks for being patient *smooch* xoxoxox Rosie
** A little angst, a lot of sweet Spuff - and a complete, non-cliffie chappie just for you :) **


Chapter Twenty Nine ~ Never Tear Us Apart

“Don’t ask me what you know is true.
Don’t have to tell you I love your precious heart.
I was standing. You were there. Two worlds collided.
And they could never tear us apart.
We could live for a thousand years,
But if I hurt you I’d make wine from your tears.
I told you that we could fly, ’cause we all have wings
But some of us don’t know why.
I was standing. You were there. Two worlds collided.
And they could never, ever tear us apart.”

~ INXS


It took Buffy over an hour to enlighten him to the whole sordid mess. Starting with the night her and other Spike had nearly made love in the graveyard ending with dinner with Riley and seeing him with Faith. She told him about her dreams, and all the things she’d thought about in between – how she realized they’d been working up to this all along. And most of all how she just couldn’t deny that she was in love with him one moment longer. But the complications – oh, the complications…

Spike’s face was blank with shock. Whatever story he’d been expecting to hear, it wasn’t this. He could never’ve dreamed this one up in a million years. Alternate Universes? An alternate him? And this wasn’t his Buffy…not technically speaking? And his Buffy was where?

“ Sweet bleedin’ Christ.”

He whispered, voice soft with awe. He had no idea what to do. Here in front of him, was the very thing he’d wanted most in all his days. Buffy was here, now - telling him she loved him; she wanted him - wanted to be with him. But the hows and whys of it were staggering. It seemed impossible; he’d seen some truly strange shite in his time - and hello, vampire – but THIS…

“ You sure you didn’t just get a knock on the head?”

He eyed her skeptically.

“ No! Why does everyone keep asking me that?”

She scowled with annoyance.

“ Sorry, Love. Guess that’s just the easiest explanation.” He shook his head wonderingly.
“ Lot easier to grasp than this…”

Buffy was curled on the far end of the sofa, arms wrapped around herself protectively.

“ I just needed you to know. In case…”

She looked down, unable to finish.

“ In case you go back you mean.”

His voice betrayed none of his inner turmoil.

“ Yes.”

She looked up at him tentatively; so afraid of what she might see.

“ Is that what you want…? ”

How could he be asking her if she wanted to leave him? But he had to know. He clenched his jaw, bracing himself inwardly for her answer.

“ I don’t know right now. You’re here in front of me and I don’t want to let go. But I don’t know if I belong here. And I miss Dawn…” Her voice caught and trembled. “ And what if she needs help? I don’t know if … if your Buffy is there with her, or where she is. Dawn might have no one to protect her from Glory now.” She paused, terrified for what her sister might be facing without her. “ And don’t I owe your Buffy something too? I mean this is her life I’m messing with.” She placed her hands on the back of her neck anxiously, tangling them in her hair. “ God, Spike it’s all so complicated and strange. I may be here forever, and if I am - I know what I want now. I know the life I want to have.”

She looked at him meaningfully. He took her hand and kissed it. The tears slipped from the corners of her eyes, finally overflowing and he moved to hold her, gathering her into his lap.

“ It’s alright, Love. It’ll be alright.” He stroked her back, comforting. “All we ever have is now. You know that, you’re a bloody Slayer! So we take what time we have together and make the most of it.” He said firmly, as if that were the obvious answer.

She broke down sobbing into his shoulder, clinging to him.

“ But what if I leave you here? I can’t do that to you! If she comes back she might not feel like this…and then…and then you’ll be alone again.”

She finished quietly, stifling her sobs. He held her away from him looking at her intently.

“ Buffy, I’d rather have you now, while I can, than never have you at all.” His own tears stood out in eyes. “ And as terrified as I am of losing you again, I’m not so cowardly as to miss the one chance I may ever have to be with you.”

His tears slid down his face and into her hair as he held on to her tightly, as if she might disappear from his very grasp.

“ At least I’ll have this, now. I’ll have it to get me through if - ”

He choked, unable to continue. He couldn’t believe the madness of this life. How could he be offered all he’d dreamed of in one breath and in another have it all taken away from him? What kind of monsters were these gods, these Powers That Be to play with lives like this? He couldn’t begin to fathom what their plans were. He felt a surge of profound resentment.

*You can’t have her!!*

He thought fiercely.

*I WON'T let you take her from me.*

Her tears fell unchecked pattering dark blots onto his black shirt. She felt so helpless right now, so out of control of her own life. She hated it so much.

“ But I might not have a choice, Spike.” She sniffled. “I mean I didn’t put myself here, I just woke up in bed with Riley.”

He growled unconsciously at that.

“ I could be yanked back at anytime. Sometimes I think I might only be dreaming…but it’s so real…”

She trailed off wonderingly.

“ So even if you decide to stay…you can’t be sure you will.”

His voice was flat and dead with the pain of it.

“ Yes. I HATE that, Spike. I hate it!”

She pulled back from him, wanting him to know, to understand.

“ I know, Love. I know. I hate it too.” He soothed, pulling her close again. “ But you say the Scoobies are workin’ on it – and old Rupes? We’ll figure it out then. You lot always do.” His voice was full of confidence, easing her fears. “ Certainly put an end to enough of my evil schemes.”

She chuckled along with him this time.

“ True.”

She burrowed into the security of his arms. Somehow feeling safe. It was hard to imagine anything hurting her here. But she knew deep down, there was always something out there in the darkness, gunning for her.

*If they really ARE after you is it still paranoia?*

She wondered tiredly, the exhaustion of the last few days dragging her down.

“ See, Love? It’ll be alright. I’ll MAKE it so.”

He said firmly - with the kind of conviction that could only belong

To a man in love.


** See, I really can write a non-cliffie chapter...Once in awhile ;p Next time pornaliciousness and a nice long update. And fret not children, all questions will be answered and all conflicts resolved by the end. I guarantee happy endings for everyone (I'm sappy that way). *warm fuzzies to all* Rosie xoxoxoxox**
Chapter Thirty ~ Lady by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
Okay, this is the last chapter I needed to add - finally we're all up to speed. New chappie this week (yay!) Stay tuned, True Believers...
** I don't think yer ready for this jelly - this chapters too pornalicious for ya, baby... Time to slip into something comfy and enjoy the sweet, juicy Spuffy lovin' -- Mmmmhmmm. Go on, you know you want it, you know I want you to ...

PS ~ This is the best Schlock Rock song EVER so I just had ta use it - and what better chapter? ;p **


Chapter Thirty ~ Lady

“ Lady, when you’re with me I’m smiling, give me all of your love.
Your hands build me up when I’m sinking; just touch me and my troubles all fade.
You’re my lady of the morning, love shines in your eyes. Sparkling, clear and lovely. You’re my Lady.
Lady, turn me on when I’m lonely, show me all of your charms. Evenings when you lay down beside me, just take me gently into your arms. You’re my lady of the morning. Love shines in your eyes, Sparkling, clear and lovely – you’re my lady.”

~ Styx


She awoke the next afternoon in Spike’s bed -disappointingly fully dressed. The only things missing were her socks and boots.

“Hey.” she said sleepily. “ What happened?”

He smiled down at her adoringly.

“ You fell asleep in my arms, so I carried you down here. Hope you don’t mind.”

She smiled at him sweetly.

“ No. But what am I wearing all these clothes for?”

He snorted.

“ Don’t think I wasn’t tempted, Pet. Just didn’t think I could control myself otherwise.”

She grinned.

“ I wouldn’t have minded.”

“ Oh, now you tell me.”

He kissed the tip of her nose and rolled her onto his chest for a cuddle.

She chuckled at that, snuggling into his embrace.

“ And you – with the t-shirt.” She lifted up the blankets suspiciously, rising up on one elbow. “ And the boxers. I always pictured you as a sleeping naked kinda guy.”

He raised his eyebrow at her, smirking.

*Picturing me naked was she?*

“ Normally I am. Again with the admirable self-control.”

She shot him a coquettish pout.

“ I don’t know if I like this new self-control having. I like my Spikes self-control free.”

He grinned wickedly, admiring the delicious temptation of her protruding lower lip.

“ Oh you don’t know what you’re in for, missy…”

He pounced on her, making her shriek with delight and captured the offending lip between his teeth gently. He sucked it into his mouth and then released it for a languorous kiss, enjoying the feel of her sleep-warmed body against his. If he had his way they would wake up like this every bloody day.

“ Mmmm.” She hummed. “Yum. Morning Spike…” She kissed him back and wrapped her legs around him, skating her feet down the backs of his legs sensually. “ I like Morning Spike.” She said between kisses. “ Speaking of which…” she giggled, admiring his growing erection.

“ What’d you expect? I got you in my bed draped all over me. I’m not bleedin’ dead
y’know.”

“ Well, actually…”

“ Ah ah – that’s un dead, Princess. As you can clearly see.”

He gripped the solid mass through his boxers proudly, a cocky grin on his face.

“ I really didn’t get that good of a look at it…”

She said coyly, lifting up the covers for a peek.

*My, my - is it really as big as it seems?*

He raised an inquiring eyebrow at her. She just smiled at him enigmatically.

*Kitty wants to play, eh?*

He flipped open the covers and lay back comfortably with his hands behind his head.

“ By all means, Love. What’s mine is yours.”

He dared her with an insolent smirk and a cock of his eyebrow.

*Well, you can’t blame a girl for being curious…*

She smiled tentatively and reached out a shy hand to feel him through the black striped cotton. He gasped when he felt the warmth of her through the thin fabric.

*Shite, what have I gotten myself into?*

He didn’t know how much ‘playing’ he could withstand at this point. She smiled with more conviction now, encouraged by his reaction. Boldly she worked her hand inside his waistband to hold the erection itself, flesh to flesh.

He clenched his jaw fighting for self-control. He was not gonna come in his shorts like some nancy schoolboy. But her soft little hand was on him. BUFFY'S hand. Exploring his body with such naive curiosity. It was almost more than he could bear.

She pushed his boxers down a bit and sat beside him Indian-style. She’d felt it before of course, that night in the graveyard. But it was dark and they were…rushed. She’d never seen it all up close and personal. In fact she’d hardly seen any, in the flesh – so to speak. She’d only been with Angel the one time, and it had been in the giddy charge of teenage emotions. Parker: a one night stand in the dark. And Riley. Well, let’s just say foreplay wasn’t his thing. Neither were lights. Or experimentation of any kind. She wondered briefly for a moment how other Buffy could possibly be marrying him.

*So not my problem. Thank God.*

She thought, happily turning her attention to this new pretty thing in her hands. And it was pretty. She never thought a penis could be such a thing. But Spike’s was beautifully made. A long and elegant shaft, alabaster white with a marble of blue veins here and there, tinged faintly with pink just around the head. And thick too, her small hand barely fit around it.

*So it IS as big as it looks.*

She grinned wickedly, anticipating fun to come. Spike caught her smile and swallowed reflexively. He had a feeling he was in for more trouble than he bargained for. (And wasn’t he always when it came to Buffy?) When she began to move her hand she proved him right.

Buffy caressed him teasingly, enjoying herself. She’d never had one to really play with before. And Spike made her feel so comfortable, like she could do whatever she wanted and it was A-okay. Running her nails lightly over the length to the head, she felt him quiver. Then she grasped it firmly in one hand and stroked it, using the foreskin to manipulate him dexterously. She listened to his strangled gasp with satisfaction.

*Boy parts are fun!*

She thought giddily. She continued stroking him gently with one hand and moved the other up under his shirt to play with the flat planes of his stomach and chest. When she flicked her nail over his nipple she felt his cock jump in her hand. He groaned out loud.

*Oooo! Looky what I found: a magic button!*

She was having entirely too much fun he decided – ready to pin her to the bed and have some fun of his own. He was just picturing the look on her face as he ripped her pants off with his teeth when her voice broke thorough his thoughts.

“ You know there are entirely too many clothes in this bed.”

She declared, pushing up the hem of his shirt. He raised his eyebrow at her.

“ You want it off then?”

She nodded confidently, smiling.

“ All of it?”

He let the question hang seductively in the air.

“ Oh yeah.”

She grinned wider. When he moved to take his shirt off she started unbuttoning her own.

“ Buffy…”

He stumbled, getting an eyeful of her delectable tits.

“Yesss?”

She purred, shedding her blouse. He gulped audibly.

“ If you…” he cleared his throat, rallying. “ If you take off your clothes I will not be able to keep myself from ravishing you. THOROUGHLY.”

Damn William and his gentlemanly notions! They popped up at the most inconvienient times.

*I am NOTa gentleman!*

Spike thought sourly. But alas, he was – when it came to love. William remained a part of him, however hard he tried to smother the ponce.

“Oh.”

Buffy flushed prettily, taking his meaning. She wasn’t quite ready for unrestrained Spike yet. She just wanted to play right now, enjoying each other without any pressure. But boys were always in such a hurry… She sighed, thinking.

“ Well, give me your shirt then.”

He looked at her blankly.

“ Give me your shirt.” She repeated slowly. “I wanna be comfortable, and my clothes are all…bindy. You take your clothes off, I keep some on. See? Perfect compromise. I get to play, you get to enjoy – and nobody gets 'ravished'.”

“ But what if I want to ravish you?”

He pouted, clearly unconvinced. She shook her head in the negative.

“ Too bad, Mister man. You’re just gonna have to wait your turn.”

He grumbled at this, but took his shirt off and handed it to her. He was just reaching for his boxers when she unzipped her jeans and began sliding them off. Well, she didn’t expect him not to watch did she? He wasn’t insane… For a moment there she was all but naked in nothing but a matching set of sheer glimmery underwear. He could see her nipples perfectly and the dark curls of her sex. Unclothed the scent of her arousal filled the air like perfume. His cock throbbed painfully against his belly.

She had no idea what she was askin’ of him right now. Restrain himself? With her? Christ! The chit expected bloody miracles. He growled low in his throat in protest, but sat back on the bed in surrender all the same. Buffy pulled his black tee over her head and flipped her silky blonde hair out of the neck. God, she was perfection. She made his plain t-shirt look like the sexiest lingerie he’d ever seen. He sighed lustfully and pulled off his boxers, her slave once more.

She crawled onto the bed and sat next to him, cross-legged. With practiced ease she did the infamous girly bra trick and pulled it out one sleeve, tossing it over her shoulder.

“ Ta da.”

She said, grinning mischievously.

“ Oh, that is SO unfair. You in my shirt, no bra and those tiny little knickers? And you expect me to control m’self… Whaddya think I am, woman - made of steel?”

She eyed him archly.

“ Do I have to tie you up?”

“ Don’t say things like that, Pet.” He chuckled ruefully. “ You’re not helping matters. Though I do have a pair of shackles about, if you’re really interested.”

She seemed to pause and consider this.

“ Maybe later - If you’re a good boy. Now lie back and close your eyes.”

“ I should’ve known you were a top. Bloody control freak…”

But he smiled when he said it and lay down obediently.

The first lick caught him off guard. Her tongue was warm and lusciously wet as it traced his neck up to his ear. She scraped his earlobe with her teeth and flicked it with the tip of her tongue. He stifled a groan.

*She is in SERIOUS trouble after this.*

Buffy found the curve where his shoulder and neck met and gave him a sharp sucking bite there. He shuddered and moved to pull her down to him, wanting to capture her mouth. His eyes flew open in surprise when she pinned his hands to the bed roughly.

“ No touching.”

She commanded. He growled back at her willfully.

“ Do you want me to stop?”

She arched a perfect brow at him.

“ No.”

He finally admitted.

“ Well then. No touching.”

He grumbled a bit, but put his hands down at his sides, clenching his fists in frustration.

“ You’re gonna pay for this later, Pet.”

He threatened, closing his eyes again. She smirked.

“ We’ll see.”

She was thoroughly enjoying being in control for a change. Her life had been full of men that decided they knew what was best for her. Her father, Giles, the Council, Angel, and more recently; Riley. She was damn tired of it. Giles she trusted, and lately they seemed to have formed more of a partnership, working side by side. But the rest of them could go straight to Hell. She was taking control of herself and her own life, right now. From the looks of things she found the perfect partner to do that with. Finally a man that was willing to let her be in charge for once. And she did SO love getting him to submit.

She grinned wickedly and bent back to her work - tracing the hollow of his collarbone with her tongue and then moving lower to capture a pale pink nipple in her mouth. He rewarded her with a small moan, and she sucked harder rolling the other one in between her fingers - just as he had once done to her. It was a very effective technique; she should thank him for that later. She leaned over him switching sides, using her teeth to nip and scrape over them roughly. He was panting raggedly now and she could feel his erection pulsing against her stomach.

God, she was killing him. Working his nipples like that – how did she know? And he could feel the unfettered fullness of her breasts brushing him every time she moved. It was driving him mad not to be able to reach under the loose fabric of her shirt and take them in his hands. He was burning permanent crescent marks into his palms he was clenching his fists so tightly. Spike didn’t know how much longer he could last. But he really, really did not want her to stop.

When she licked down to his belly and paused briefly to dip her tongue into his navel he almost lost control. He couldn’t remember ever being this aroused before. The combination of her sweet inexperience and uninhibited playfulness was a heady cocktail. Oh, the things he could show her. All the things he dreamed about were on the verge of happening. He couldn’t wait to make her come… He cut off that train of thought before it got him into trouble. He was about to lose it as it was, he didn’t need any naughty thinking spurring him along.

Buffy bypassed his cock in favor of his tasty looking hipbones, tracing the outline of each carefully. Then positioned herself between his legs to trace the inside of each thigh. She stopped over his femoral artery to give him a long tingling hickey. She could feel him trembling to contain himself, to hold back. It made her giddy with excitement.

*Well whaddaya know - I’m actually good at this.*

Finally someone gave her a chance to see what she could do. And she was loving every minute of it. She situated herself comfortably in front of him and waited for him to open his eyes, which he did after a minute – looking at her curiously. She really wanted him to see this…

*What’s she up to?*

“Christ! Buffy!”

He cried out when she took him into her mouth. She sucked him from the mid-point of the shaft to the head then swirled her tongue around the tip as she pulled back. Taking it out of her mouth she flicked her tongue along the sides and then up again. Sucking in just the head, then out to lick the shaft. She repeated a pattern of leisurely sucks and licks until his cock was glossy with her saliva and he was panting raggedly. He was completely at her mercy now and it made her feel powerful - like a goddess. His reaction to her turned her on terribly. Her panties were wet through, and she was beginning to long for her own release. It felt delicious to delay it, to draw everything out until the last uncontrollable minute. And it was all at her whim.

*Let’s show him what a benevolent goddess I can be.*

And she licked him from his balls to the head of his cock then took him into her mouth as far as she could. His body arched toward her and he roared out in pleasure. It was a gorgeous animal howl that sent tingling shocks to her nipples and a rush of fluid into her panties. Made all the more gratifying by the knowledge that she was responsible. She was making him feel like this, could do this to a man. It almost made up for not being a Slayer anymore.

She was about to go in for the kill when she felt his hands on her drawing her upwards.

“ Please, Baby…need to touch you. Can’t take it anymore…”

She loved the husky pleading tone in his voice. And she was hungry for his touch. She crawled up Spike’s body and sat astride him, planting herself firmly on top of his raging erection. He groaned loudly.

“You wanna touch me?”

She asked seductively. Spike nodded, unable to speak for longing. Buffy stripped off her shirt and leaned forward to kiss him.

“ Then touch me.”

She whispered against his mouth. He growled and wrapped his hands in her hair kissing her ravenously. He could feel her everywhere. The hot silk of her naked body pressed against him from neck to groin. Nothing between them but a tiny scrap of diaphanous fabric. He pushed up into her and ground his hard cock into the saturated cloth. She moaned and sat up to slide suggestively against him, rubbing her wetness along his full length.

“ Tryin’ ta kill me, Slayer…”

He ground out roughly. Then he pulled her down to him and flipped her onto her back in one fluid motion.

“ My turn.”

He rasped, burying his face in her neck. He licked over the scars that others had left, growling possessively. Nipping her playfully but not drawing blood. There’d be time enough for that when she asked him for it. Somehow he knew that she would…sooner or later. He licked up her neck to behind her ear, when he found a small sensitive spot in the hollow she moaned and shivered, breaking out in little goosebumps.

*Memorizing that one for later.*

He thought, licking a path from her neck to her cleavage. The little goosebumps followed him all the way down. It was tremendously gratifying. He secured a nipple in his mouth and flicked it with his tongue, when he captured the other one between his fingers and rolled it slowly she gasped and arched into his mouth.

“Like that, Kitten? Just wait…”

He chuckled sinisterly and continued his attentions to her breasts. Before she had time to think his hand snaked its way over her belly and into her panties. He slid his middle finger over her slick lips and parted them to find the hidden rosebud of her clit. With one nipple still in his mouth he pressed down in gentle circles on her sweet spot, while stars began to appear in her field of vision. She whimpered helplessly. The man went right for the money, no messing around.

*That’ll teach her.*

He thought with satisfaction as Buffy panted beneath his hands.

*Who’s in control now, eh?*

He switched to the other nipple and slid his finger deftly within her. She was the tightest, hottest thing he’d ever felt. And she was so wet for him, so ready. He ached to be inside of her. But not yet… He had plans.

*Gonna make her come at least twice before I have my wicked way.*

Spike was grinning from ear to ear, having the time of his life. This had to be the best day of his entire existence – alive or dead. Here was Buffy, his golden goddess – spread out before him, panting hotly and soon to be calling his name. It didn’t get much better. He could honestly say he had never been happier; with the possible exception of the moment she told him she loved him.

*Oh yeah. At LEAST twice.*

When he slid another finger in she let out a throaty cry of pleasure and thrust her hips to meet his hand. He moved down her body to taste her, the sharp scent of her arousal calling to him. Peeling off her little panties he set his mouth to work. He spread her lips apart with his thumbs and buried himself in her saturated sex. It was sheer fucking Heaven, the taste and smell of her surrounded him. He could almost come right now without even touching himself.

She slid her legs over his shoulders, her thighs pressed against his ears as her hands tangled themselves in his hair. How many nights had he dreamt of this very thing, stroking himself alone in the dark? And this was even better, so much better, than all his lurid imaginings. He could never have conjured up the taste of her, both sweet and tart at the same time, or the musky perfume of her scent. It made him hungrier than ever for her. He wanted to eat her alive, swallow her whole. He felt ravenous for the very essence of her self.

He licked her gently exploring every satiny inch of flesh, taking pleasure in the taste of her. Spreading her wide he bared her clit and attacked it with his tongue. In only a few minutes Spike felt her thighs starting to twitch in the tell tale sign of impending orgasm. He smiled with a deep sense of satisfaction. Wetting his fingers with her slick juices he slid two inside of her, angling for her g-spot. She shrieked her pleasure when he found it and clenched her thighs around him. Fortunately he had no need for air. He flicked her clit with hummingbird speed and felt her orgasm build until it broke over him like a wave. She screamed his name as she came, her inner muscles wringing his fingers with each contraction. He savored the rush of fluid that came with her climax, drinking her in. It was almost better than blood.

On his knees before her he used his fingers to their best advantage, drawing out her orgasm into waves of multiples. She rewarded him with a sharp cry of gratification and wailed again as another climax hit her. He moved above her to capture her cries of pleasure in his mouth, as if drinking them in. She kissed him violently and bucked up to meet the thrusts of his hand. He knew she would be like this, just knew it. She was as untamed and ferally passionate as he ever hoped for.

She took him by surprise when she grasped his erection and began stroking him fiercely.
He gasped and moaned her name into her mouth.

“ God, Buffy…”

“ Want you to come, Baby. Want you to feel so good…the way you make me feel.”

She rasped, panting. Her hand was warm and insistent on his neglected prick. He couldn’t bring himself to stop her. Didn’t want to. He responded by pressing his fingers into her g-spot again, caressing it from the inside. She came again immediately, sobbing with the intensity of it. She squeezed him with each contraction but never stopped stroking him.

Buffy pulled away from him suddenly and angled herself down his body to capture his hard length in her mouth. She wasn’t about to let him go wanting, not when he’d just given her the most intense pleasure of her life. She’d never experienced anything remotely close to this. It was incredible.

She sucked Spike’s beautiful cock all the way into her mouth, enjoying the taste of him and the satiny texture of his skin. She wanted him to feel all the pleasure he’d given her and more. Buffy was determined to give him the orgasm of his unlife. It was the least she could do…

He couldn’t believe the cock sucking he was getting from her. The girl had natural talent. Her hot wet mouth worked him over feverishly. And the way she was moaning right now, like she loved it – not like it was her turn, or she was just trying to get him off as quickly as possible. She acted like there was nothing else in the world she’d rather be doing. It was driving him crazy. He wanted to be inside of her so much, but felt helpless against the onslaught of her wicked mouth and tongue. There was only one thing that would make this better.

Spike pulled Buffy’s lower body up to him and dropped her artfully onto his mouth. She gasped as her sensitized flesh came into contact with his cool wet tongue, but she didn’t stop.

*There. Bloody perfect.*

He captured her clit in his mouth and sucked it gently for a moment before sliding his whole tongue inside of her. Buffy thought she would die from the pleasure of it and let out a strangled cry around his cock.

*C’mon, Princess – just one more time for Daddy.*

He lashed her mercilessly, arm wrapped around her waist holding her tight. Buffy felt her Universe start to spin like a tilt-a-whirl and doubled her efforts, adding her hand beneath her mouth.

“ Fuck, Buffy don’t stop!”

She devoured him ravenously anticipating his pleasure, wanting it. Wanting all of him. Needing to taste him and satisfy him in a way that was almost primal. She took him deeply into her throat and used her tongue to swirl around the shaft focusing on the head on the up stroke. She felt his whole body stiffen as his orgasm came on and she clamped down sucking for all she was worth. Spike shouted out her name and came in her mouth with an unearthly howl. It was the sexiest thing she’d ever heard. She expected him to stop pleasuring her then, but he didn’t. He covered her sensitive clit with his mouth and licked it gently until she joined him in that blissful chaos, moaning his name as she drank in the last of him.

Finally they rolled apart, covered in each other’s sweat and fluids and very deeply satisfied.

For the moment.



** Wow. Was it good for you too? *Smokes cigarette* You must admit I do deliver - a nice, long, hard...chapter, and no cliffies. Now that you love me again, won't you please go vote for my fic at the Lovebite awards? *Bats eyes* It's up for Best Fluff and Most Original Storyline.

Go to: http://www.lovebite-network.info/awards/

Winning would make me ever so happy - I would write faster and more and be bound to create really happy endings and lots more smut. *Bribe,bribe*

Pretty please with whip cream and naked Spike on top?

*Licks and Spanks to All* Rosie xoxoxoxox**
Chapter Thirty One ~ Wicked Game by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
At last a new chapter (huzzah!) ...
**Sorry 'bout the wait, Guys. My new job is eating my life. I'll be updating once a week normally. Meanwhile - here's some fluff, some Spuff, a little light comedy and just a dash of angst. Mmmm, tasty! Enjoy :) **


Chapter Thirty One ~ Wicked Game

“World is on fire, no one can save me but you.
Strange word desire, makes foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I’d love somebody like you.
No I never dreamed that I’d lose somebody like you.
And I don’t wanna fall in love.
No, I don’t wanna fall in love – with you.
What a wicked game to play to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do to make me dream of you…”

~ Chris Isaac


They lay back panting and recovering as the afterglow set in. He pulled her from her spot at the foot of the bed and tucked her neatly beside him.

“ That was…” Buffy trailed off, unable to find the words.

“ …fucking amazing.” Spike finished grinning at her. “ I knew it’d be that way with you, Pet.”

She smiled shyly at him.

“ You did?”

“ Bloody right I did. Just didn’t know how amazing.”

She answered his giant grin with one of her own.

“ It was pretty 'how'.”

She turned towards him nestling herself into his side comfortably.

“ Yeah. An’ we didn’t even get to the main course yet.”

He kissed the top of her head and played idly with the silky strands of her hair.

“ We didn’t?”

“ Nah. That was just the hors d'oeuvres. WET the appetite – so to speak.”

He waggled a roguish eyebrow her way, making her giggle.

“ And the dessert?”

She asked coyly. He smirked leaning over her.

“ You are the dessert, Love. And I’ve got half a mind to get right to it…”

“ Really now?”

Her tone was a saucy challenge he accepted with a kiss.

“ Definitely.”

He went from ear to neck to thigh in a fluid string of kisses and licks. Before she could blink he was between her legs smiling in anticipation.

“ Dessert looks yummy, I must say.”

“ Really? You …like the way it looks?”

She was shy and hesitant; no one had ever really looked at her there before.

“ It’s beautiful, like every part of you.” He said sincerely then smiled. “ And tasty too.” And he bent his head to his work, grinning.

Somewhere upon her third multiple orgasm she grabbed him by his ears and dragged him up to her.

“ C’mere you.” She growled, kissing him ravenously.

She could taste herself on his lips and found she didn’t care. It was somehow erotic and blended in with the million other sensory experiences she was having at the moment. Buffy wrapped her legs around her lover and ground her wet delicious heat against him. Spike shuddered at the sensation of her slick sex sliding against his erection. He pinned her to the bed with his hips, maneuvering his body until his head was poised against her opening.

“ This what you want, Pet?”

“ God…” she gasped, more than ready. “Want you, Spike. Want you so much…”

The sound of his name, said in her voice so husky with desire, was almost more than he could take. He bent down to kiss her thoroughly, then raised himself up enough to grasp his cock to slide it home. Such a perfect moment, all he had ever wanted was happening right now. He had a second to thank whoever had arranged it before

Someone started knocking on his door.

Loudly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“ Balls!” He cursed angrily under his breath. “ Just ignore it, Love. They’ll go away.”

Buffy nodded, wide eyed - anticipating his next motion. Cock still in hand he moved to enter her again.

This time the knocking was a pounding that became a crash as the crypt door was kicked open.

“ Sweet bleeding CHRIST!” he roared, rolling off of his love. He grabbed for his pants tangled on the floor, furious at this interruption. “ Of all POSSIBLE fucking moments…” Whoever it was, was about to die a swift and bloody death. “ Stay here,Pet. I’ll be right back.”

She nodded and pulled the covers up around her demurely. He just hated to see her cover up. Spike looked at her longingly, holding back a whimper of frustration. Someone was REALLY going to pay for that. He pulled his t-shirt off the floor and made for the ladder. God, his shirt still smelled of her – it was intoxicating. His erection throbbed in response to her scent. He growled and reached for the first rung thinking;

*Blood. Death. Dismemberment.*

Just then from the upper level they heard;

“ Spike?”

He exchanged a look of wide-eyed fear with Buffy, along with a simultaneous thought:

*Faith.*

Somehow they’d both managed to completely forget she existed.

“ Shite!” He cursed quietly, crossing the room to her side. “ Get dressed. Hide in the tunnel. I’ll get rid of her…”

Buffy gathered her clothes with lightning speed as Spike rushed for the ladder.

“ Yo! Dead Boy.” Faith’s voice was closer.

They had time to share a single look of regret before Buffy made a dash for the tunnels.

“ I’m coming, Woman. Don’t get yer knickers in a twist.”

He entered the upper level nonchalantly, stretching as if having just awoken. Faith cocked an eyebrow at him.

“ And good mornin’ to you, Prince Charming.”

Spike sauntered over to the couch and sat down casually, digging in the pockets of his discarded coat for his cigarettes and lighter.

“ Whaddaya expect, Faith? Vampire remember?” he lit a smoke and sat back comfortably, taking a drag. “ It’s the middle of the bleedin’ night for me.”

“ Well you’d still be sleepin’ all comfy if you woulda come over last night.” She flopped down on the opposite end of the couch, looking pouty.

Shite. He’d completely forgotten. He was supposed to meet her after Dawn went to sleep.

“ Sorry, Babe. Took a nap, turned into sort of an all-nighter.” He covered coolly.

She smiled and scooted up next to him.

“ That’s okay, Baby…” she purred, “You can make it up to me.” She kissed his neck and slid a seductive hand up his thigh. “Right now.”

Spike had just enough time to appreciate the true horror of that idea. Him shaggin’ Faith after a marathon foreplay session with Buffy - all with Buffy hiding in the tunnels just close enough to hear the whole thing. Bloody hell. His formerly evil self would’ve appreciated it immensely.

He placed a hand on top of hers to stop her roving.

“ C’mon, Pet…”

He patted it in a conciliatory way and held it in his own.

“ What’s the big?” She asked leaning in to lick his neck in just the right way.

Damn but that girl knew all his buttons. He released her hand, big mistake he found out as it began wandering again.

“ Pet…” He warned.

“ I know you want to…” she bit his earlobe sharply, making him gasp. “ I can FEEL it.” And she grabbed the erection that rightfully belonged to Buffy firmly in her hand. He squeaked in a very unmanful way and pulled her hand away.

“ Sorry, Babe – just a bit knackered.” He covered lamely.

“ Still?” Faith raised her eyebrow at him.

“ Just a bit…probably from sleepin’ too much. I’ll be fine after a shower an a nice cuppa.”

“ You sure? Might wake ya up a little.” She smiled saucily at him.

“ Rain check?” he did his best to smile sincerely.

“ Alright but yer missin’ out.” She shrugged.

“ Don’t I know it.” He agreed, nodding just a little too vigorously.

“ Make it up to me later?” She shot him her sexiest smile.

“ 'Course I will.”

“ Guess I’ll leave ya to it then.” She rose and started for the door.

“ Thanks, Babe.” He smiled at her gratefully.

“ Sure. See you after sundown.”

“ Right.” And he closed the door behind her thankful for the reprieve.

Outside the crypt she paused, thinking.

Funny, but not once in there did he call her “Love”.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike laid his head against the smooth oak of the door with a profound sigh of relief.

*Shite, that was close.*

His emotions were in a confused tangle at the moment – on the one hand he was over the moon about Buffy. She loved him, she’d said the ACTUAL words! And he was highly aroused by her sheer presence, not to mention the hours of delight they’d whiled away this very morning. He found he wanted her more than ever, in point of fact.

But then there were the insane complications that went along with this whole package. She could be wrenched away from him at any time by God knows what powers or magicks. Or she could actually choose to leave for Dawn’s sake, or her poor sick Mum’s - if anyone could ever figure out how to get her home that is. That thought sent a bolt of pain through his unbeating heart. He didn’t know how on earth he could possibly do without her now - he was so terribly,agonizingly in love with her.

Somehow, before - he’d managed to keep it in check. It was easier when he believed he could never, ever have her. It never went away, but it was manageable. But now that he’d had her in his arms – in his very bed – he couldn’t even begin to imagine how he’d ever let her go. And if all that weren’t enough to send a fella’s head spinnin’ – there was Faith.

He was experiencing a feeling he wasn’t at all accustomed to. It took him a bit to figure out what it was. Guilt. Spike actually felt guilty about something.

*Weird that.*

He didn’t want to hurt her. After all her only crime was not being Buffy. There was simply nothing to be done about it – she couldn’t help that she wasn’t "The One". And she couldn’t be held responsible for his inability to love anyone else. He'd simply have to break it off, as gently as he could. And all without letting her know that Buffy was involved in any way. He didn’t even want to think about what she'd do if she found out.

*Blood, death, dismemberment…*

But the upside of it all was that he would have Buffy then, free and clear.

*At least for a while...*

He pushed the thought away, frowning. Can’t think like that. Can’t let anything get in the way of this happiness. So it would be fleeting – wasn’t it always? Wasn’t that all the more reason to enjoy its full measure now? Spike was determined not to waste a moment of it.

*Speaking of which…*

Someone was waiting to share that happiness, and all the pleasures it entailed. He smiled happily and made for the lower level ladder.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He found Buffy waiting just inside the tunnel entrance beside his bedroom, distressingly fully clothed.

*Well, we’ll just have to remedy that won’t we?*

He smiled lasciviously at her, mind full of all the things he planned on doing to her the rest of the day. It was her worried frown that shook him from his thoughts.

“ That was too close, Spike.”

He smiled at her slyly and wrapped his arms around her.

“ Yeah, but ya gotta admit the sneakin’ around bit’s exciting.”

She gave him an amused smile of her own.

“ Maybe…a little.”

He kissed her then and pulled her easily up into his arms. Her legs wrapped around his waist quite naturally, as if they had done this very thing a thousand times. How well they fit together was lost on neither of them. Without breaking their kiss Spike carried her back to his bed, right where she belonged. Wanting to make up for the time he’d lost this morning he quickly began undressing her.

“ Spike…Sweetie…Do you have important things to do today?”

She asked between kisses, concerned.

“ Yep.” He nodded vigorously. “ And they all involve you and this bed. And possibly the couch.” He kissed her. “The floor.” He kissed her again. “A crypt or two and the shower.” He kissed her a third time for good measure and smiled with great satisfaction.

“ Ooooo, a shower.” She paused and looked at him quizzically. “Wait. You have a shower?”

“ Yeah. How d’ya think I stay this good looking and well groomed? It takes work ya know.” He huffed indignantly.

“ I guess I never really thought about it. But a shower sounds nice.” She kissed him back and settled her half-clothed body comfortably against his. He grinned down at her and kissed the top of her head with affection.

“ Oh, it will be with you in it. I could while away a happy hour just soaping you up, Love.” He waggled his eyebrows at her suggestively “Wanna take one now?”

Buffy caught the look and wrinkled her nose at him in mock reproach.

“ Not if you’re just gonna make me all dirty again. I believe someone mentioned the floor? Although if you have a bathtub in there…”

His brain filled instantly with images of her naked, soapy body sliding through his hands and gliding against his as they frolicked in a large claw foot tub.

*My kingdom for a bathtub…*

“ No, damn it all. But I’ll take you to the nicest hotel in town this very minute and spend the rest of the day washing your hair and feeding you room service.”

“ Oooo, spoilage. Me likey.”

She sighed happily and snuggled against his chest.

“ Whatever my girl desires she shall have.”

He stroked the smooth silk of her hair lovingly.

“ You’re gonna ruin me for all other men you know.”

She said matter-of-factly, pulling back to look at him.

“ That’s the plan, Princess. That’s the plan.” He leaned down and kissed her deeply “Wait – WHAT other men?”

Buffy giggled at him and slid from his grasp.

“ Wouldn’t you like to know?”

She teased moving just out of his reach.

“ Oh, yer in for it now, Kitten.”

“ Am I?” She asked coquettishly.

“Bloody right you are.” And he lunged for her across the bed.

Buffy shrieked happily and ran in the other direction, but Spike caught her as she rounded the far corner of the mahogany footboard. Pulling her down to him with a growl he pinned her on the mattress and attacked her neck with nibbling kisses.

“ Let’s see who’s ticklish now, eh?”

And he proceeded to dig his fingers into her sides and belly until she broke down in a fit of hysterical giggles. As a final touch he finished unbuttoning her shirt and zerberted her belly button with unrestrained glee. Buffy laughed with delight at this silly, tender gesture and pulled him up to lie next to her. He snuggled in with a sigh of contentment and realized that he had never been so happy in all his existence. Ever.

In his mind’s eye endless days stretched out before them, all like this. Filled with laughing kisses, constant lovemaking and a happiness so acute it was almost painful. It made him want to cry…. Because it seemed to be almost within his reach. Almost. He had it now in the palm of his hand.

But for how long?


** Angst,angst,angst... It'll lighten up a bit (and get WAY smuttier) next chapter. I know, I know - I'm such a dirty girl. Blame my muse - he's terribly naughty, and I just can't seem to control him. Like right now he's all shirtless and pale and pretty...*drools* Gotta go - the muse calls :D
*snuggles of luv* Rosie xoxoxox**
Chapter Thirty Two ~ Hungry for You by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
So not kidding about that NC-17 rating, Kiddies...
** I must preface this with a disclaimer: I do not, in any way, speak French. (Except for an extremely naughty phrase or two I picked up from my highschool boyfriend...but I digress) I do however, love this fucking song, and felt compelled to include it (read the chappie and you'll know why.) I did my level best to find accurate spellings for the words and a decent English translation for the lyric - which you'll find at the end.

In conclusion if you are French, or merely a snotty intellectual type - DO NOT write me letters. I don't care. I tried, and am satisfied. That is all.

PS - If you've never heard this song before (you heathen) go forth and download it now - I command you... Seriously, you'll be glad ya did. It is muy caliente... **



Chapter Thirty Two ~ Hungry For You ( j'aurais toujours faim de toi)

“ Rien de dormier cette nuit
Je veux de toi
Jusque'a` ce que je sois sec
Mais nos corps sont tout mouille's
Comple'tement couvert de sueur
Nous nous noyons dans la mare'e
Je n'ai aucun de'sir
Tu as ravage' mon coeur
Et mois j'ai bu ton sang

No matter what I do
I’m still hungry for you.
No matter what I do
I’m still hungry for you…”

~ The Police*



Aphrodite smiled with deep satisfaction at the freshly mated pair as Eros goggled in awe at her side.

It was precisely how she said it would be. Once faced with the true reality of a “normal life” the Slayer had gone running from it - right into the arms of her intended. This only proved his theory that the Slayer and vampire were meant to be - in any Universe. Eros might just make it a point to see that it was so… It certainly seemed to please the Powers That Be, who were practically humming with approval.

His only question was how this muddle was going to work itself out. Was the Slayer to be forever trapped here – and what of the other, the one that actually belonged here? And the Key? Was it to go unprotected? He sighed, head swimming. His mother had set machinations in motion so complex that it tied his brain in knots trying to make sense of it all. He was far outclassed by the goddess who now stood at his side, quietly gloating.

*Big guns indeed.*

And so much for a simple love match - when he’d been drawn to the vampire’s brightly burning heartlight he had no idea it was at the behest of the Powers. Manipulating bastards that they were… Though he supposed it was all for the best possible cause. Aphrodite had given him a brief glimpse of the battle to come: a legion of primordial vampires, Sunnydale a ruined crater in the earth, and The First’s true face. He shuddered at the memory.

His final vision had been the death of the vampire. Burnt to ash for the chance to be a true champion, to be worthy at last of her love - yet not even accepting it in his final moments, her whispered “I love you” met with denial. He could not help his tears then. Such a waste of Love! Such a waste of a sparkling soul – the initial glimmers of which drew him to this earthly plane in the beginning.

Eros was more determined than ever to see this through.

However long it took – the vampire and Slayer would be as one…

He would make sure of it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy and Spike lay side by side in dozy contentment, happy to simply be together for the moment. It had been a long journey to get to this place and it was such a new and fragile thing between them yet. They both knew it could be over in the blink of an eye – Buffy whisked away to her own world, with neither of them able to have a say in the matter. Privately Spike thought the PTB had a bloody helluva lot to answer for.

*Wankers. If only I could get my hands on one or two of ‘em…*

He smiled sinisterly to himself at the thought.

*They better pray I never make it up there.*

Buffy caught his evil smirk and raised a questioning eyebrow his way.

“ I know that look. That’s your “Up to No Good’ look.”

“ Who? Me?” He played innocent. “I’m just lyin’ here mindin’ my own business.”

She rose up on one elbow, resting her head in her hand.

“ Uh huh. Tell me another one, Spikey.”

He looked taken aback.

“ Hey, don’t go callin’ me that now. Harm used ta -”

“ Would you prefer Blondie Bear?”

She batted her eyelashes at him ingenuously.

He gave her a low growl.

“ Oh you are just ASKIN' for trouble, Princess.”

She sat up and put her hands on her knees.

“ Ya think so?” she asked in a mock-serious tone.

He nodded, a dangerous glint in his eye.

“ Why is that…Peaches?”

He sat up, indignant.

“Oi! Now that one was below the belt.”

She nodded agreeably, slipping quickly from the bed.

“Wasn’t it just?”

“ That’s it. Time to pay the piper.”

He leapt across the bed and grabbed her, but she managed to wiggle her way out of his grasp. With enhanced Slayer speed she made a dash for the ladder, but he was too quick for her. He threw her over his shoulder and carried her back to the large four-poster.

“ Someone needs to be taught her manners.”

And he dumped her unceremoniously onto the mattress. Spike settled himself down on the edge of the bed comfortably and hauled her up over his knee before she could get away again.

“ What’re you up to?”

She asked suspiciously.

“ Teaching you not to play with fire.”

Buffy smiled at him winningly.

“ But I like fire. Fire pretty.”

He cocked his eyebrow at her.

The first swat caught her off guard.

“ Hey, Spike – not funny!”

“ Maybe not for you…”

He smacked her again on the other cheek.

“ Ow!”

“ What’s a matter, Slayer? Can’t take it?”

“ Oh, you are so gonna get it when-”

Smack!

“ HEY!”

He was grinning from ear to ear.

“ Spike …” her voice held a warning tone he cheerfully ignored, delivering yet another well placed slap to her lovely bum. Buffy began squirming madly in his grasp, but he wasn’t about to let her get away - he was having entirely too much fun. “ You’d…better…let me…go.”
She threatened him between wriggles.

“ Now what kind of man would I be ignorin’ your education like that?”

Whap!

Buffy was flushed and panting now as she struggled vainly to free herself from his iron grip. Spike thought she’d never looked lovelier. Her hair was mussed, her chest was heaving and she was covered in a light sheen of perspiration – no wonder he was hard. Her eyes widened when she felt his erection poking her in the belly.

“ You gianormous perv ! You’re getting off on this!”

He chuckled lasciviously at that and slid his hand in a seductive caress over her upturned ass.

“ How could I not be?”

His hands continued to wander over her vulnerable self, one making its way into her open shirt. He palmed a perfect peach breast and skated his thumb over her already hardened nipple. Buffy bit down on her lower lip to contain her groan.

“ ‘Sides – ‘M not the only one now am I?”

She closed her mouth with an obstinate snap.

*So not giving him the satisfaction.*

Spike chuckled to himself. He adored that stubborn streak – made it so much fun to tame her. His questing hand found its way inside her bra cupping her sweet breast, flesh to flesh.
Buffy inhaled sharply through her nose; mouth intractably sealed against her whimper of enjoyment. He rolled her nipple between thumb and forefinger while his other hand made its way back to her pert behind; forced into the air by the position she was in. He circled each cheek in turn with a slow teasing stroke and just as she was relaxing into his touch –

Spank!

“Ow! What-”

And he gave her nipple a sharp tweak, this time she couldn’t contain the breathless moan that escaped her.

Back to slow caresses, alternating with fondling her breasts and nipples and just when she was lost to his seduction - a sharp, tingling smack. He did it again and again, until she was dizzy with sensation.

Buffy was on fire, her body a confused tangle of feelings, pain and pleasure blurring into each other until she couldn’t tell the difference and didn’t care. When he slid his hand between her damp thighs she couldn’t keep herself from arching into it..

“Oh God…”

Was all she could manage at the moment.

“ Like that, Kitten?” He rubbed her forcefully through her jeans until she cried out. “ Knew you did.” His voice was a low growl in her ear, making her shudder. He pulled back for a stinging slap and she cried out again.

Christ, she was wet. He could feel her arousal soaking through her jeans and the scent of it hung in the air like the world’s most intoxicating perfume. He wanted nothing more than to tear her clothes from her body and bury himself to the hilt inside her. But he was determined to break her yet. The only question was whether he would snap before she did. He never could control himself when it came to Buffy.

“You like it don’t you, Baby?” She bit her lip, not quite ready to give in yet. Spike couldn’t help but smile at her obstinacy. He went back to working her breasts over, enjoying the weight of them filling his hand. He took each nipple one at a time, alternating teasing caresses and sharp tweaks until she was whimpering behind her gritted teeth. And just when he felt she’d had all she could take, he aimed a solid smack low on her ass, just up against her sensitized sex. She rewarded him with a throaty moan of pleasure that made his dick throb inside his jeans.

She was almost there.

Spike grinned wolfishly, knowing he was close to her sweet surrender. It was going to be so very delicious when she did. He couldn’t say he wasn’t enjoying having the upper hand with Buffy for a change. So rarely did he have this kind of power over her. It seemed he was always the one on his knees…

*Not for long.*

He slipped his hands in between her thighs again and stroked along the center seam of her jeans. He used the material to its best advantage pressing it into her cleft and rubbing it against her clit.

“ Know you like it, Kitten.”

His voice was a seductive purr.

“ Know you want it.”

He increased the pressure and ground down in concentric circles.

“ Just give in. Tell Daddy what you like…”

He added fingers to her nipples

“… What you want.”

Buffy shuddered helplessly under his hands, the combination of his hypnotic voice and talented hands driving her to the brink of orgasm, even through her clothes.

*What has he done to me?*

“ Then I’ll make it all better.”

He felt her body tense, she was building up to a climax already. He upped his pace.

“Give you just what you need.”

He felt her tremble on the precipice – the right touch from him would send her over. So he pulled his hand from between her damp and shivering thighs to give her one last spank.

Smack!

Right between her spread legs. He added a few more for effect across her sweetly upturned ass. (How could he resist?) Listening with delight to the animal grunts and groans each strike produced. She was a whimpering mass of need by the time he was done with her. She had no thought but to end her torment and gain relief. Her nerves were buzzing with pent up arousal. She pushed back into his hand to try to gain some friction. So when he asked her again;

“You like it don’t you, Buffy? Like it just as much as I do…”

She almost sobbed from the overwhelming sensations flooding her.

“ Yes…” Was a strangled whisper, her acquiescence barely audible.

But Spike heard her all the same.

With a hungry growl of satisfaction he pulled her upright and onto his lap in one swift movement. Flush to his chest, she was facing away from him, her breasts and sex easily accessible to his roving hands. Under her open shirt he effortlessly unhooked her bra. Taking her breasts in both hands he ground himself up into her sultry heat.

“ This what you want, Pet?”

She could do little more than whimper.

His hands found their way to the clasp of her low cut jeans and unbuttoned her with a casual flick. She gasped as his cool fingers came into contact with her hot, sensitive flesh.

“ So wet for me, Baby.”

He murmured into her ear. He leaned her forward, forcing her legs wide and slid his hand down into her jeans, fingers entering her before she could catch her breath. And if this wasn’t enough to put her senses on overload, his other hand came up to play with her already tender nipples.

“ No, Spike…can’t…” She wavered, overwhelmed.

“ Shhh, Baby. Gonna make it so good for you.”

He thumbed her clit then, playing her like his favorite musical instrument. Knowing just what string to pluck to get the note he wanted.

*Too much, too much!*

She couldn’t take it. She was so revved up from the spanking and touching and now his hands seemed to be everywhere at once. She’d lost all control over herself and the situation and now she was far too gone to regain it. Spike spun her to face him then, settling her on his lap again before he renewed his assault. He slid three fingers inside her, filling her, stretching her – while he studied her face with hungry intent, devouring her look of abandoned pleasure.

Fuck. She was gonna come. Two minutes with just his hands and she was going to come. Was that even physically possible? Apparently it was – as his thumb ground down on her again she felt her body let go like a roman candle on a hot July night.

“ God! Spike… Coming…”

And she rode her orgasm out, his fingers thrusting deep to find that sweet spot inside that sent her off again… and again. He pulled her tight to him and kissed her as she spasmed around his hand.

She was a total wreck. Sweating, clothes askew, bra dangling from one arm – traces of mascara under her eyes and panting like a dog.

He had never wanted her more.

Spike drove his fingers into her one last time as he kissed her greedily. He wanted every ounce of her pleasure, every drop – all for himself. He leaned in to capture a rosy nipple in his mouth. Buffy gave a guttural cry and arched her back, fingers digging painfully into his shoulders as she bucked against him. She was coming again – and he was this close to joining her. The way she was riding him right now, the primal look of gratification on her face – knowing it was him making her feel that way. She wouldn’t even have to touch him – if she just said his name like that one more time …

Buffy pushed his hand away, unable to take even one second more of his attentions. She surprised him by shoving him back onto the bed with a low, animal growl - his shirt was rucked up around his neck and half way off before he could think what was happening. When it caught on one arm she simply tore it free and threw it to the floor. She pinned his wrists to the bed and kissed him fiercely, biting his lip and nipping his jaw as she made her way down his torso. He felt the scrape of her teeth against his neck and struggled for control of his over-stimulated body.

And then she bit him,

REALLY bit him.


Thank God it was only his shoulder, or it would’ve been all over. As it was, he couldn’t contain the roar that escaped him or keep himself from grinding into her roughly. He was only just containing his demon at the moment. It wanted out and it wanted Buffy – right the fuck now. Spike clamped down internally, keeping the bastard barely in check. At least it gave him a distraction from wanting to come in his pants.

Buffy gave a sharp bite to his pectoral muscle and covered his nipple with her mouth. He moved to pull her up to him tangling his hand in her hair, but she pushed it down on to the bed, pinning him there.

Fuck, but she was turning him on.

He never knew she could be like this – hoped maybe, but he’d never had occasion to see it. Now he was getting the floorshow, and loving every minute. Buffy nipped at his other nipple and gave it a thorough tonguing. She sucked it into her mouth and then licked her way down his stomach while he groaned. She paused to dip her tongue into his navel making his hips jump involuntarily. Spike was thisfar from begging her to do…well, anything really. Touch him just a little, lick him, suck him – anything, everything. Just do it soon. She stopped at the fly of his black jeans, nuzzling his stomach.

“ You like it, don’t you, Baby?”

*Shit.*

He was in serious trouble.



*"Although you have had enough tonight
I want you until I am satisfied
Our bodies are all wet
Completely covered with sweat
We are drowning in its pool
I still desire you
You ravish my heart
I drink your blood

No matter what I do
I'm still hungry for you…"

English Translation by Bashir at Stingetc.com





** Okay, is it me or is this story just getting pornier and pornier? I like the smut what can I say? ;p And apparently some of you like it too 'cause I'm up for 3 (count 'em) more awards.

One (or several) of you lovely people have nominated me for Tabula Rasa/Best AU, Becoming/Best WIP and Something Blue/Funniest,Best Fluff at the Breathless Awards.

I thank you sincerely and deeply (and possibly with tongue). I'm tickled pink to be so well thought of by my esteemed readers and fellow writers.

If you'd like to help me win (and we all know what winning does for my writing he he) please go vote/nominate me at:

http://www.geocities.com/breathlessones/BreathlessAwardsHome.html

Deeply feelin' the love tonight, my darlings...

*SMOOCH!* Rosie xoxoxox **
Chapter Thirty Three ~ Bedroom Dancing by Soul of the Rose
** Here ya go, Kiddies - a nice, long, juicy chapter just for you. Sorry about the wait, but I actually had to do some research for this one. Special thanks to the Buffy Trivia Guide site for the names of the monks and knights. And Templar History.com for information on the Knights of Templar. Go forth and enjoy the fruits of my labor..**



Chapter Thirty Three ~ Bedroom Dancing

“ I said if you wanna do the tango then we’re gonna need a ballroom.
So she took me by the hand and led me to her bedroom.
And then she did it, stripped me half naked, and told me that her body was sacred.
She said I could take it, if I danced with her – but somehow I knew that she was an Indian giver.
I said what about tomorrow? She said what about tonight? She said trust me, Baby it’ll be alright.
And so we danced and danced and danced and danced all night…”

~ Day One



He opened his eyes to see her smiling at him sinisterly.

*Payback’s a bitch.*

He thought, with no small measure of amusement. He should’ve known she wasn’t gonna let him just GET AWAY with his earlier performance - Buffy never let anything go. She was definitely going to make him suffer. Many hours of potential torment awaited him. Spike wasn’t sure if he should laugh or cry - she might just kill him this time. Either his prick would explode or he would simply expire from sheer frustration.

She unbuttoned his jeans, leaving the zipper up and then casually licked the flesh she’d just exposed, carefully avoiding the half inch of cock sticking out of his waistband.

Yup. She was definitely going to kill him.

He’d already worked himself into an agonized state of arousal over the course of the morning. Between being interrupted earlier and the little S&M session he’d just had with her he was more than ready for release. Didn’t look like she had any intention of letting him have it though. Not any time soon anyway – too busy tormenting him with her tongue at the moment.

Buffy occupied herself with the flat plane of his stomach, taking her time with leisurely licks and nibbles. She stopped at his navel once more for a taste and then made her way to his hipbones. She licked each curve of muscle in the hollow that lead to his groin making him groan pitifully. She ignored him of course and kept right on with what she was doing, eventually making her way back to his chest. She settled on his left nipple, gently taking it in her mouth and sucking it.

Spike was wholly unprepared for the sharp bite that followed. He snarled in frustrated pleasure, eyes flashing yellow. One more like that and all his vows of waiting til SHE asked to be bitten would be bloody out the window. He gave her a low growl of warning and she grinned back at him mischievously.

“ What’s a matter, Big Bad? Can’t take it?”

“ Oh, you ARE playing with fire, Kitten.”

“ I told you, I like fire.”

She straddled him then, grinding against his erection with intent.

“ Fire pretty.”

And she kissed him slowly and deeply until his head was swimming and he was drowning in her once again.

Gently she parted from him to sit upright, straddling his hips – the sultry heat of her burning him through his jeans. With agonizing care she removed her shirt and tossed it and her dangling bra to the floor, leaving her smooth golden torso naked to his gaze. She was still wearing her jeans, though they were unbuttoned and partially unzipped - barely showing the top of her neatly trimmed chestnut curls. He found the effect incredibly devastating.

She lowered herself to him again, warm meeting cool, flesh to flesh. Her perfect breasts flush against his chest as she nuzzled his neck, licked his collar bone and nibbled his earlobe.

Surely he would die soon.

This torment couldn’t go on forever…

Buffy rose up to kiss him, sucking his lower lip into her mouth and finally biting it. He couldn’t suppress the small moan that escaped him, making her smile wickedly. With infinite slowness she slid down his body, dragging her hard nipples down his chest and stomach, scalding him with her body heat. When she got to his groin she paused and breathed with purpose over the solid bulge in his pants.

“ God, Buffy…yer killin’ me, Love.”

She just smirked at him and moved to unzip his jeans.

He was so hard right now that it hurt. Every nerve was alive and sensitized, eager for her slightest touch. When she finally unzipped him his cock sprang free with a small bounce, as if it resented being confined. Spike was practically shaking with pent up desire. She wouldn’t have to ask him to beg if she waited much longer…

Buffy settled herself comfortably between his legs, grinning with evil intent. A line from a favorite movie occurred to him then;

*I see you shiver with anticipation…*

When she clutched him in her hot little hand it was almost enough to make him come right there.

*Bloody Ponce.*

He held on by the barest thread, knowing her next move could be his undoing.

Resting casually on her elbows she played with him. Toyed with his cock like she didn’t have a care in the world - as if he weren’t about to shred the sheets in frustration. She’d give it a few strokes then stop and swirl her thumb over the head. Then she’d squeeze him firmly until he groaned and then move on to something else, never staying in one place too long.

Spike was quite certain he was in Hell.

As good as her attentions felt they did nothing to relieve the tension that had now grown to Vesuvian proportions inside him. His balls were going to detonate any minute now, he was sure of it.

When he felt her tongue on him at last he almost jumped out of his skin. Buffy gifted him with a series of torturous licks, circling the head and up and down the shaft. Using the lightest of strokes she tormented him with her little pink tongue until he thought he would go mad on the spot.

*Can’t take it…*

“Buffy, Baby…please…”

She smiled at him like the cat that ate the cream, pleased with herself. At the moment he couldn’t care less, just as long as she touched him…

Finally, finally she took his painfully throbbing erection into her mouth. He nearly lost it then, it took every ounce of self-control he possessed to keep himself in check. He tried picturing unsexy things. Chaos demons dripping with goo. Fyarl snot. The weeping sores of a Balrog. It wasn’t doing much good…

*Xander in a tutu.*

There, all better. If that didn’t distract him, nothing would. Best not to think about it too much though. If he went completely soft, Buffy might get the wrong idea. Though when she sucked him all the way to the back of her throat he figured there wasn’t much danger in that.
She pulled him out of her mouth slowly, skating her tongue along the underside the whole way. When she got to the head she scraped it purposefully with her teeth. The pleasure-pain of it did nothing to placate his demon, which had been screaming at him for the past hour.

But that wasn’t the worst thing. That wasn’t the thing that was driving him slowly out of his mind at the moment. Oh no.

It was the look on her face.

She looked sexy and disheveled and fully in charge of herself – not to mention him. She looked like there was nothing on earth she’d rather be doing than sucking his cock. Like it was the best thing she’d ever tasted and she would gladly spend all night between his legs. He knew exactly how she felt.

And it was killing him.

She loved him and she wanted him – as deeply and ravenously as he wanted her. The knowledge burned him almost as much as the feel of her hot, wet mouth devouring him. She didn’t have to break him, he was already her willing slave. And if she wanted him to beg, he would without pride or pain. He would give her anything and everything she wanted.

Because he just couldn’t help himself.

He had been hers body and soul from the moment he realized he was in love with her. It was simply his nature; to give all to the woman he loved. He didn’t know how to hold back or to half-ass it - Spike was an all-or-nothing kinda guy. And William would settle for nothing less than full devotion.

*Doomed from the start you were.*

He thought ruefully, reaching out to stroke the glossy crown of her head.
Still, he wouldn’t trade it for anything, not a moment. Even if it meant he might lose her someday soon. The little bit he’d experienced with her was the best he’d ever had. She was worth every moment of pain and suffering he might have to endure - she’d far surpassed his dreams already …

Buffy was as beautiful close up as she was from afar, she radiated light. She made him laugh, she made him weep – and she could kick his ass, or at least give him a good run for his money. And if all that weren’t enough she was wildly passionate in ways he never dared hope. She met him stroke for stroke

*No pun intended.*

Everywhere he wanted to go, everything he wanted to do – she was willing. This gorgeous, deadly girl was the most amazing sexual experience of his life. And they hadn’t even actually had sex yet. And God, if they ever got ‘round to it … he’d probably burst into flames.

*To be inside all that heat…*

He cut the thought off hastily. He couldn’t afford any naughty thinking right now.
It was difficult enough trying to distract himself from her feverish mouth…

She sucked him hard then, cheeks hollowing on the way up. All thought left his brain abruptly. Buffy locked eyes with him, hypnotic smoky jade holding his gaze while she worked him over. He was captivated. She added her hand, twisting slightly on the up stroke and he moaned helplessly, completely under her power now.

Spike was losing the battle for mastery over his body; she was simply too much for him. He couldn’t fight the deadly onslaught of her wicked mouth. All too soon he felt his climax building to the breaking point. Always the gentleman, he warned her between pants;

“ Can’t…hold back… much longer, Pet…”

He thought she might stop then, pull back or perhaps use only her hand, but there was no hesitance in her movements. If anything she became more vigorous, using her hand and mouth in perfect unison. He could no more resist their motion than the tides could resist the moon. Before he knew it he was sucked into the undertow and drowning with the force of the orgasm that broke over him.

Spike came with a primordial howl, his demon released at last – eyes glinting yellow, deadly fangs extended. Buffy shivered in reaction, inexplicably aroused by the display. It stirred something deep inside her she was barely aware of; her Slayer nature responding to the call of its true mate.

The demon that lay at the heart of her being rejoiced in finding her counterpart at last. All this time she had been waiting for him, discarding the worthless suitors that had tried to claim her. Their weakness and fear revolted her – but not this one. He had no fear; he would claim what was his. She tasted his rightness on her tongue, smelled it on his skin – and was most pleased.

Buffy finished him off with a swirling lick, thoroughly enjoying the taste of him. She never thought she would like that, but something about Spike… Every bit of him was just plain delectable.

He lay back in dazed contentment, hardly able to comprehend that the angelic beauty before him had just given him the blowjob of a lifetime. She kissed his belly affectionately and crawled up the bed to snuggle in beside him.

He sighed happily and pulled her close, feeling like the luckiest bloke in the world. And it was only the beginning – so much lay ahead of them. There were so many things he wanted to show her, to teach her. She’d never even been off continent! A whirlwind trip to Europe unfolded in his mind, Rome, London, Paris…he’d give her the world wrapped up in a neat little bow - a fitting gift for his princess. He was picturing moonlight strolls along the Seine and mad shags at the top of the Eiffel Tower when Buffy’s voice broke in on his planning;

“ Whatcha thinkin’ bout?”

He smiled at her adoringly and tucked a golden strand of hair behind her ear.

“ You.”

“ Again?” She teased.

“Always.”

And he rolled her to him for a sweet, lingering kiss.

Buffy’s cell phone chose this inopportune moment to go off on the night table.

“ Ignore it, Love.” He pulled her closer, molding her body to his.

“ Oh, I plan to.” She said, moving in to devour his succulent mouth.

The little phone stopped ringing as it transferred into her voice mail.

*Plenty of time to get that later.*

She thought busying herself with the sweet fullness of his lower lip.

*Spike flesh...Yum…*

Her phone began ringing again a moment later.

“Dammit!” she cursed, rolling sideways off his lap to check the caller ID, it was Willow. “This better be important.” She growled picking up the phone.

“ What’s up, Wil?”

“ I think we found something. Can you come to the shop?”

“ When?” She stared longingly at Spike who was laid out before her like a Calvin Klein ad; all sexy and shirtless with just the top button of his form-fitting jeans undone, showing off the commando state of affairs below.

“ Well, now actually. It’s important, Buffy.”

Buffy let out a small whimper of frustration.

“ Alright, alright. I’ll be there soon.”

“ Great. Bye.”

Buffy clicked her phone shut with an aggravated snap. She looked at him regretfully.

“Baby, I have to go.”

“ Damn. Scooby business? Somethin’ bout you?”

“ Yeah.” She said listlessly. “Willow said it was important.”

“ If it was for any other reason…”

“ I know.” She sighed, feeling annoyed. The last thing she wanted to do right now was leave him.

He snuggled up behind her and nuzzled her neck affectionately.

“ S’all right, Love. There’s always tonight. I could take you out…” He nibbled her ear, “ Or keep you in…”

Buffy nuzzled back, cuddling closer.

“ Mmmm. Quality Spike time. Sounds perfect.”

He wrapped his arms around her tightly.

“ Lemme spoil you, Kitten. I’ll take care of you all night.”

She smiled brightly at the thought.

“ It’s a definite date.”

She kissed him sweetly then, loathe to leave the comfort of his arms. But if she waited much longer she wouldn’t go… She’d get sucked back into the velvet warmth of their bed and that’d be it for the rest of the day. Buffy disengaged herself gently.

“ Guess I’d better shower.” There was a marked lack of enthusiasm in her tone. “You gonna show me where the hose is?”

Spike looked deeply offended.

“ Hey now! I’m not an animal – it’s a proper shower.”

She tilted her head and looked at him skeptically.

“ Really? Cause I’m picturing something you MacGuyvered together with duct tape and a rain gutter.”

“ Underestimatin’ me as usual.” He snorted derisively, shaking his head. “ It just so happens I know a demon contractor who owed me a favor or three. Had a shower and sink installed, plus a few other necessities.”

“ Like a toilet?”

She asked, not relishing the thought of another precarious squat in the tunnel.

“ Like a towel rack and medicine cabinet. Don’t need a toilet.”

“ Oh. I just thought with Faith staying here maybe -”

He cut her off;

“ She never stayed here.”

Buffy looked doubtful.

“ No?”

“Not really, no.”

“ How come?”

Spike shrugged non-commitally.

“ Didn’t want her here. This is my space - my…place. Didn’t wanna share it with anyone.”

“ But you let me stay…”

She said, fishing a little. He faced her, resting his hands on her shoulders.

“ Cause you’re the exception, Pet – to every rule.” He smiled. “ Now about that shower…”

Spike took her hand in his and gave her the grand tour of the facilities, taking up exactly 5 minutes including the interludes for kissing.

“I could join you, ya know…help you with those hard to reach areas.”

He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“ Spike...”

She warned, feeling her already jello-y resolve wavering.

“ Come on, Baby…”

He gave her an adorable pout, doing his best to be irresistible – not like it was a stretch. She shook her head at him, smiling.

“ But Buuufffy-”

She cut him off with a raise of her hand.

“ Nothing you’re about to say leads to me getting clean.”

“ True.” He grinned wickedly.

“ Don’t make this any harder…”

She pouted back at him.

“ Harder, eh?”

Buffy smacked his arm with a laugh.

“ Stop it, you big perv.”

He smiled genuinely at her, enjoying their easy rapport.

“ Alright, alright. I’ll stop. But can I at least watch? Always been a dream a mine to watch you shower…”

Spike sighed lustfully.

“ Only if you promise not to do anything pervy.”

He grinned triumphantly.

“ Done.”

Somehow she just didn’t believe him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy found Willow and Giles at the Magic Box an hour later. Willow looked ready to pop from excitement. She bounced eagerly in place grinning.

“ What is it, Wil? Better tell me before you explode.”

“ It’s just that we found something -”

Giles came forth with an open book in his hands, interrupting her. Willow shot him her ‘Glare of Death’. SHE wanted to be the one to tell…

“ In our research we discovered a passage in the Book of Tarnis about the monks you encountered.”

Buffy glanced down at the pages in front of her frowning.

“ The ones who made Dawn?”

“ Precisely.” He began flipping through the book. “ Their order was initially Franciscan but split into their own sect after the discovery of the Key - sometime in 1289. Once they realized how powerful, and potentially dangerous, it was they created a covert sect to protect it.”

Willow broke in;

“ Ooo, and those Renaissance Festival-type guys that’ve been chasing you?”

“ Yeah?”

“ They were originally part of the Knights of Templar.”

She said triumphantly, giddy with so much barely-contained knowledge.

“ Which means what?”

Buffy looked at her expectantly.

“ Nothin’. I just thought it was cool.”

Giles seemed to find the page he was looking for.

“ Yes, the son of the last Grand Master of the Knights Templar, Etienne de Molay began the sect after his father was burned at the stake for heresy in 1314.” He scanned the pages in front of him, reciting information. “ King Philip of France began persecuting the knights in 1307… He wanted their vast wealth to fight a war with Edward I, it’s purported he was also threatened by their power and immunity within the Church.” He stabbed a finger into the book. “ Here it is - Jacque de Molay was wrongfully executed by Pope Clement and his son vowed to continue his father’s work. That’s when the Knights of Byzantium were founded.”

Buffy was unmoved by this show of intellectual prowess.

“ Fascinating. And this has to do with me how?”

“ Er - yes. I do apologize. Ahem. We discovered some information regarding the Order of Dagon – the monks you met up with. It seems one of their most recent members – Brother Ibrahim, kept a journal. An account of all that has transpired in the order over the past 25 years, including the spell that transformed the Key into, well … Dawn. The council only recently acquired it, after Brother Ibrahim died at the hands of Glory and her minions several months ago.”

*Finally! Something I can work with.*

Buffy jumped into pro-active mode.

“ So how do we get our hands on this thing?”

Willow grinned at her.

“ We already have, Buffy. Giles has the hook-up.”

Giles raised his eyebrows at that.

“ Indeed. I had to call in a rather large favor from an old associate still connected to the Council – but we did obtain it. Not entirely legally…”

Buffy put a hand to her chest in mock dismay.

“ Giles! You did something naughty? And possibly illegal?”

He looked nonplussed.

“ Well, ah…yes, actually.”

She patted his arm affectionately.

“ I’m so proud.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For what had to be the tenth time that week Buffy found herself settled at the research table, a pile of large and rather musty old books in front of her. If she spent any more time here she’d have to start paying rent – Anya would insist on it.

Giles and Willow had spent the last fifteen minutes catching her up on the history of the Knights of Byzantium, Glory and the Order of Dagon. Her head was swimming with so much new information. It wasn’t getting her home again – although at this point she didn’t know if that was really what she wanted. She was so happy with Spike right now, and he was happy with her. It’d been forever since she felt this good…

But then again what if Dawn needed her? Or her Mom? She sighed in frustration. Why did things have to be so complicated? At least she was relieved from having to make any decisions at the moment - no one had a clue how to send her home yet.

*Maybe they never would…*

Willow was vying for her attention, so she pushed the bad thoughts away and focused.

“ There’s something else, Buffy.”

Giles added;

“ Yes, we’ve uncovered quite a significant detail – and it pertains directly to you.”

She and Giles exchanged an inscrutable look and then Willow sat down next to her, studying her closely.

“ Buffy – the monk’s intention was for the key to be as protected as possible. They called on the essence of the Slayer to create her human form, so she would be physically bound to her guardian.”

Buffy nodded and said carefully;

“ Yeeaah. Hence with the sisterly thing.”

Willow continued;

“ Yes, but when they did it they tapped into every Slayer that was active at that time.”

Buffy was confused.

“ What?”

*But that means…*

“ They created Dawn from Faith – because she was the Slayer on duty at the time. But Buffy, you were in self-induced retirement – no one ‘deactivated’ you.”

Giles interrupted;

“ If that’s even possible to do. As far as we know death is the only thing that…” He cleared his throat. “Well, you see what I mean.” After tactfully cleaning his glasses Giles continued;
“She is made from your essence, from both of you. In this reality she is tied to you and to Faith.”

Buffy’s mouth hung open in shock.

“It was always intended for the two of you to be her protectors.”

Willow took over for Giles;

“ They just didn’t get to finish the spell because of Glory’s interruption. So Buffy here never received her piece of the fabricated memories.”

Giles continued;

“ Nor did anyone else, so Dawn has been Faith’s sister alone. If it weren’t for your sudden appearance, none of us would be the wiser.”

Willow smiled at her gently.

“But really Dawn is sister to both of you.



** OMG! Can you believe I did it to you AGAIN? Yet another evil cliffie - and a whole new twist in the plot. Blame the plot bunnies - they haunt me and make me do bad things. I told ya there was a reason she was still in the AU...and this is just the beginning...Mwahahahahahaha ;p

Let me also give much praise and thanks for the brand spankin' new nominations I recieved this past week;

"Best General We Missed the Bed Again Award" at the Spuffy Awards:

http://www.flesh-for-fantasy.com/SpuffyAwards/index2.php?x=vote.html

Best WIP, Most Humorous, Best Written (!) and Best Author (!!) at the Lost in Spike Awards:

http://www.bringonthebloodshed.com/lsa/form.htm

And finally:

Best WIP,Best Comedy and Best Romance (nice) at the Love's Last Glimpse awards:

http://www.loveslastglimpse.com/awards/index.html

I'm overwhelmed - I hardly know what to say. Thank you for all the love, Guys. You rock me. *heartfelt snuggles of love* Rosie xoxoxox**
Chapter Thirty Four ~ Bad Girl by Soul of the Rose
** I would like to preface this with my sincere thanks for all those who have taken the time to read, review and nominate my little fic; Baby, you're the greatest! Somebody ( sombodies?) have some serious snuggles coming to them.

Here's the latest:

Best Saga, Best Naughty Fic and Best WIP at the Blood Ties Awards.

Wanna support the cause? Go to:

http://www.angelfire.com/ab8/bloodtiesawards/nom.html

*Buckets of Love and Gratitude to All* Rosie

Now on with the show...**




Chapter Thirty Four ~ Bad Girl


“Something’s missin’ and I don’t know why.
I always feel the need to hide my feelings from you.
Is it me or you that I’m afraid of?
I tell myself I’ll show you what I’m made of.
Can’t bring myself to let you go.

I don’t want to cause you any pain, but I love you just the same.
And you’ll always be my baby.
In my heart I know we’ve come apart,
And I don’t know where to start.
What can I do?

I don’t wanna feel blue…

Bad girl, drunk by six, kissin’ someone else’s lips.
Smoked too many cigarettes today.
I’m not happy when I act this way.
Bad girl, drunk by six, kissin’ some kind stranger’s lips.
Smoked too many cigarettes today.
I’m not happy this way…”

~ Madonna



He leaned casually against a lamppost outside the Espresso Station - it was their usual meeting place. Spike was dreading this. He’d never done it before, not really - there’d never been a need. Usually he was the dumpee, not the dumper. But he and Buffy had agreed – the sooner, the better. And she was planning to show Captain America the door… He smirked at the thought.

*God, I wish I could be there for that.*

Still, Faith was an alright girl, never did him any harm. He found himself nervous about hurting her.

*Bleedin’ Twonk.*

He sighed. It was making him nostalgic for his formerly evil days. He’d probably just eat her then and be done with it. But there was no help for it, he had to break it off the hard way. The payoff was he’d be free then. Free to be with Buffy every minute of every day for as long as he could have her. He’d miss the Niblet though.

That gave him a pang.

He sighed again and lit up a smoke, feeling like a condemned man waiting for the executioner to show. Finally Faith sauntered into view and he swallowed, hoping not to bollocks it up too badly.

“ Hey, Handsome – I’ve been missin’ ya.”

She embraced him warmly and kissed his neck. And he thought he couldn’t be any more uncomfortable… Spike disengaged himself gently.

*Best get this over with…*

“ We have to talk, Faith.”

She smiled broadly, missing his cues entirely.

“ ‘Bout time. I was beginnin’ ta think you were avoidin’ me, Baby.”

“Yeah. About that…” He scratched the back of his head nervously. “It’s just… I’ve been doin’ some thinkin’, Pet.”

“ Should I be worried?” She gave him a saucy smile.

He looked back at her grimly. Her smile faded.

“ So maybe I oughta be then.”

“ Pet...I don’t know quite how to say this…”

She frowned at him, fidgeting under his heavy gaze.

“ Just spit it out, Spike. Yer makin’ me all anxious.”

*Come on now, just say it you Git!*

“ Right.” He took a deep breath “ I think we should cool it off.”

“What?” Her tone was incredulous. “Cool what off? You mean us?”

“ Yes, I mean us.” He said evenly.

She looked stunned.

“ Why? I thought we had a good thing goin’ here.”

He kept his tone gentle, trying in vain to ease the blow.

“ We did. But we both know it’s not goin’ anywhere and never will.”

Suddenly he was faced with an extremely brassed-off Slayer, and he had a moment to wonder if she had any stakes at hand…

“ Where the hell is there to go, huh?” Her voiced rose angrily. “ What? You wanna get hitched all the sudden? Lookin’ to have a couple rug rats and settle down?” She crossed her arms and looked him up and down. ‘Cause I gotta say, those white picket fences might be bad for your health, Babe.”

He ignored the implied threat.

“ It’s not like that. I just want something more out of life. Been thinkin’ bout gettin’ out of here – seein’ the world again. Maybe gettin’ back to London.” And he had, it wasn’t a lie …exactly. He’d thought about it for the whole 15 minutes before he ran into Buffy. Spike shrugged off the unaccustomed guilt he was feeling and soldiered on. “ But I dunno what I’m gonna do yet.”

He reached out to hold her by the shoulders. Looking her in the eye he said;

“ Look, Faith – it’s not you. It’s me. Just something I’m goin’ through. I need some time to m’self to get my head on straight.”

She laughed bitterly and wrenched herself from his grasp.

“ It’s not you it’s me?! Is that the best you could come up with?” She was practically yelling now. “Damn! That’s like the oldest line in the book. Right after ‘I’ll call ya sometime’.”

“ You’d rather I lie to you?” He asked, incredulous.

“ Don’t do me any favors, Asshole.” She spat back.

He braved a look in her stormy black eyes.

“ For what it’s worth – I’m sorry.” He said earnestly.

She looked him over with utter contempt.

“Yeah. You really are.”

And with that she walked away, hips switching with irritation.

*Well, that went swimmingly.*

But at least it was over. He was free to be with Buffy without worrying about Faith. And even if a little sneakin’ around was fun – it didn’t sit well with his inner William. He always was a monogamous sort. And even if he wasn’t, he simply couldn’t imagine touching Faith now. Not after being with Buffy. So even if she left… he pushed the thought away. He’d made his bed. Time to lie in it.

*Speaking of which…*

There was someone he wanted to be lying there with, wasn’t there? Spike smiled contentedly and headed for home, visions of Buffy filling his head. There were some preparations he wanted to make before his date tonight.

He wanted everything to be perfect.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith stalked back towards town angrily. She couldn’t believe that guy – feeding her a line of bullshit like that. God! And she actually thought he cared about her.

“Stupid, stupid…” she muttered to herself.

She shoulda known better. Shoulda known not to get involved, not to trust. That shit never worked out. To think she was actually startin’ to fall for him.

*Starting?*

Okay, maybe more than starting... And again – shouldn’t she know better?

*It never pays to go past bouncy.*

She oughta get that on a t-shirt or tattoo it on her fuckin’ arm so she never forgot it again.

The thing was – this was like outta nowhere. She thought they were doing great until tonight. Then he goes and drops this bomb on her. I mean how was she supposed to react?

*I’m just never gonna understand guys.*

What’d he want anyway? She never asked him for nothin’, never made any demands. They had a good time, right? Why wasn’t that good enough?

*Because I’m not good enough. I’m NEVER good enough.*

She viciously suppressed the impulse to cry, hating him all the more for making her feel that way. She never cried. She was tough. She was strong. And Momma always said;

“Big girls don’t cry.”

Not ever. Not when they were scared or hungry or alone. Not when the power went off unexpectedly and you were by yourself in the dark. Not when the latest in a series of “Uncles” was telling you to “hold still and be quiet, this’ll only take a minute.”

Trickles started down her face and she swiped at them roughly. Faith wanted to bolt; she wanted to outrun this pain – these useless tears. She wanted to find a vamp and beat him to death with her bare hands. But most of all, in deep, dark places she barely knew were there, she wanted to be held while she cried.

She wanted to feel safe and loved and okay – just for a little while.

There was only one man left that she felt that way with.

She took off towards the Magic Box running.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith entered the back way, through the training room - like she usually did. She was about to open the door to look for Giles when a fragment of conversation caught her attention…

Willow’s voice carried through the door;

“ They created Dawn from Faith – because she was the Slayer on duty at the time. But Buffy, you were in self-induced retirement – no one ‘deactivated’ you.”

Faith cracked the door open just a sliver to hear better.

Giles broke in;

“ If that’s even possible to do. As far as we know death is the only thing that…” He cleared his throat. “Well, you see what I mean.” After an awkward pause he continued;
“She is made from your essence, from both of you. In this reality she is tied to you and to Faith.”

*What?!*

“It was always intended for the two of you to be her protectors.”

Willow took over for Giles then;

“ They just didn’t get to finish the spell because of Glory’s interruption. So Buffy here never received her piece of the fabricated memories.”

Giles finished for her;

“ Nor did anyone else, so Dawn has been Faith’s sister alone. If it weren’t for your sudden appearance, none of us would be the wiser.”

Willow spoke again, quietly – so Faith had to strain to hear her;

“But really Dawn is sister to both of you.”

*What the HELL?!*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

Dawn was made from both of them? TIED to both of them? And now she’d have to what – share her freakin’ sister with Buffy?

She slipped out the back door again, feeling the need to get away and think, her earlier longing to talk to Giles all but erased by this sudden revelation. She headed out towards Restfield Cemetery, her natural instinct to patrol guiding her.

*What the fuck was goin’ on today?!*

First Spike dumps her – and she never even saw it coming. It was like a lightening bolt from outta the blue. I mean, they weren’t ready to shack up and nobody was makin’ wedding plans but they were happy right? At least she thought they were.

They had fun together, fought well together. It was gettin’ so that the demons were afraid to show their faces in this town. The only ones they seemed to fight lately were the newbies. Plus - the sex was rockin’. Good enough that it made her wanna stick around after the first time.

*And that NEVER happened.*

She never came out and said she loved him – ‘cause hell, she’d never said that to anyone ‘cept Dawn before. But he had to know right? Didn’t he?

*Shit.*

Maybe he didn’t. Faith thought back over what he’d said to her today.

*“We both know it’s not going anywhere and never will.”
“I just want something more out of life.”*

Crap. He didn’t know. Of course he didn’t. Because she never told him. And here she was blaming him and feeling all sorry for herself when she was the bad guy here. She’d been holdin’ out on him all this time, never realizing that he wanted the same thing she did all along.

Spike just wanted to be loved. Wanted something real. Just like everybody else.

*Kinda sweet actually.*

Well, she’d just have to go talk to him and straighten this out. She’d just tell him the truth; that she loved him, and had for a long time. That she wanted it to be real between them.

*God, he probably thinks he’s nothing but a fuck to me.*

That thought actually hurt her, ‘cause she cared about him so much. How the hell had she gone so long without telling him that? Her thoughts turned then to what she had told him. Just tonight.

*Fuck.*

She called him an asshole, told him off. Shit, she all but openly threatened him with a staking.

*Fuck. FUCK.*

She really needed to talk to him now. For the first time in longer than she could remember Faith had to apologize. And mean it.

*Shit. Better find him before he goes and leaves town.*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy could hardly believe the things she’d been told. It seemed like whenever she got her bearings in this crazy place something new would come along and yank the rug out from beneath her feet.

*Connected to Faith?! … Jesus!*

She jumped up from her chair, pacing out her aggravation.

“ But, Giles, how is that even possible?! I mean Faith and I aren’t even related – so how could Dawn be sister to both of us? This doesn’t even make any SENSE!”

She threw up her hands in frustration. His voice was steady, seeking to calm her.

“ I realize that, Buffy. We were just as shocked as you are. But it seems they’d been planning this for months – researching your lives very carefully. Faith doesn’t know who her
father is-”

She cut him off.

“ I know, I know.” She flapped her hand dismissively, tired of Faith’s sob story.

*As if that excuses ANYTHING…*
“And her mother was a drunk, blah blah blah - what does that have to do with anyth- No! ” her eyes flew wide in shock. “They weren’t…they couldn’t…”

Giles nodded gravely.

“ They didn’t have the chance to, but yes. They planned to make Faith and Dawn your half sisters, and Hank their father.”

Buffy’s voice escalated in fury, her face flushing.

“ What RIGHT do they have to mess with people’s lives like this?! Do you know what that would have done to my mother? Not to mention me…as if our family wasn’t torn apart enough...”

Willow rushed to comfort her.

“ But it didn’t happen. They didn’t complete the spell.” She rubbed her arms soothingly. “You’re missing the important thing here, Buffy. Dawn is still part of you – she’s your family now. Isn’t that what you wanted?”

“ Yes…of course – but it’s so confusing!” She sat down and put her head in her hands, feeling overwhelmed. “And I’m getting seriously tired of feeling like a pawn in someone else’s game.”

Giles’ voice was gentle;

“ This must feel terribly unfair to you, Buffy – but you have to understand that the Monk’s only thought was to protect the Key from Glory – at any cost. Whatever it is, whatever it does must have dire consequences for humanity.”

Buffy looked up at him, despondent.

“God, Giles. I just don’t know what to think anymore. Every time I turn around it seems like there’s a new and nasty surprise for me. First I get thrown into ‘Alterna-World’ where I have no sister and I’m suddenly retired, then I get ugly death dreams and now I find I’m sharing Dawn with Faith…of all people! My head is just spinning right now.”

Willow gave her a comforting squeeze.

“ I know, Sweetie, I know. But it’ll be alright – we’ll figure it out- untangle this mess somehow.”

“ Everyone keeps saying that! And every time someone says ‘it’ll be alright’ it just gets worse. I can’t even think right now.” She rose from the table, feeling ready to break down. There was only one place she wanted to be right now. “ I just need to go and think things through.”

“ Should I walk you-”

Buffy cut her off

“ No!” She softened her tone “ Thanks, Wil. But I just wanna be alone right now.”

“ Of Course, whatever you need. Just call me later and let me know you’re okay.”

Buffy gave her a forced smile.

“ Promise.”

And with that she snatched up her purse and jacket and dashed out the door.

Willow watched her friend’s hasty retreat, feeling helpless.

“ I really thought she’d take it better, Giles.” She said, watching Buffy through the front window.

She turned to look at him.

“ I mean, I thought she’d be happy! She missed Dawn so much…”

He studied the closed door thoughtfully.

“ As did I…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy practically ran back to Spike’s crypt, seeking comfort instinctively from him.

He was so wrapped up in his pre-date preparations that she managed to take him by surprise. He’d put sleek satin sheets on the bed and adorned the room in candles. Fresh cut flowers were scattered about – topped off by a center piece of a dozen long stem roses of the sweetest blush pink. Her very favorite.

*How does he know this stuff?*

She’d swear he could read her mind sometimes. She was deeply moved by his effort to create a special night for her. No one had ever done that before – not like this.

It made her want to cry even more.

He turned to see her trembling lip and tear-filled eyes.

“ Buffy…Baby, what is it?”

He immediately feared the worst.

Was she leaving him now? Tonight?

He enveloped her in his strong arms and she let go, finally feeling safe.

“ Oh, Spike things are so screwed up right now!” she sobbed.

He patted her back gently

“ Tell me, Love – what can I do?”

She clung to him tightly.

“ Just hold me - please.”

He gave her a reassuring squeeze.

“ All night if you like.”

She smiled a little then and snuggled into his chest.

“ Thank you. This is just what I needed.”

He kissed the top of her head softly.

“ My pleasure. Now why don’t you sit down and tell old Spike all about it, eh?”

She pulled away reluctantly and let him lead her to the bed.

He held her hands and looked at her intently, internally bracing himself for the worst.

“ Is it bad, Buffy? Do you have to go now?”

She looked at him in surprise – that thought hadn’t even occurred to her.

“ God! No, Baby – I’m so sorry to worry you.”

He sighed in relief, the knot in his gut beginning to untangle itself.

“ It’s about Dawn.”

And the knot twisted itself up again.

“ Is she alright?” He asked anxiously.

“ I’m sorry – I’m handling this amazingly badly – She’s fine. Everyone is fine. I just got some crazy news today and it’s freakin’ me out a little – or a lot actually.”

He raised an inquiring eyebrow at her, waiting for her to elaborate.

“ Giles and Willow found out some stuff – about me and Dawn.”

“ Yeah?” He prompted.

“ I don’t know if you know this – but Dawn - her human self, was made from the Slayer’s essence. In my world she was made from me, and in this one, Faith.”

“ Which is why you thought she wasn’t really your Little Sis here.”

She nodded.

“ Right. Only it turns out that Dawn was made from the essence of all the active Slayers at the time…”

“ Meaning you and Faith.” He shook his head wonderingly. “ Christ, Love – no wonder you’re feelin’ a bit wonky.”

“ Yeah, just a little bit.”

He pulled her into his arms then, rubbing her back gently.

“ It’ll be alright, Baby.”

She sighed and settled into his embrace, relaxing for the first time since she left him that afternoon.

“ Why is it that when you say it, I actually believe it?”



** Can you believe I actually made you feel compassion for Faith? Bad, bad Rosie. And you all thought this was gonna be straight fluff ;p My oh my, whatever will happen next? Stay tuned for our next episode, True Believers - it's a doozy. More next week... *Luvs* Rosie xoxoxox **
Chapter Thirty Five ~ Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
Just can't get enough Rosie? Come on over and check out my Live Journal for raw chapers, other stories, poems and my incoherent ramblings:

http://www.livejournal.com/userinfo.bml?user=souloftherose
** OMMFG! This took f o r e v e r to write! ACK! *Bangs head on desk* But let's hope you enjoy the fruits of my labor :) Those sweet reviews make it all worth while... *hint cough cough hint*

Special thanks to my beta, Jill for TLC and ego stroking while I struggled with this monster *sends luvs*

Enjoy, my darlings...**



Chapter Thirty Five ~ Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want

“Good times for a change.
See the luck I’ve had, can make a good man turn bad.
So please, please, please let me, let me, let me, let me get what I want this time.

Haven’t had a dream in a long time.
See the life I’ve had, can make a good man bad.
So for once in my life let me get what I want.
Lord knows it would be the first time.
Lord knows it would be the first time...”

~ The Smiths


For a vampire and Slayer they were surprisingly tender. Eros hadn’t expected that. But here they were cuddled up like sweethearts – reminiscent of every other couple since time began. It seemed Love was the same everywhere you went. The thought warmed his heart, knowing that Love was a constant force in an ever-changing Universe.

His mother on the other hand, seemed bent on chaos. For the life of him, he couldn’t figure out what she was up to. Had they not completed the mission? The pair were well on their way to being mated. Should they not be returning the Slayer to her own place now?

But it seemed Aphrodite had other plans…

And it was beginning to worry him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Vampire held his Slayer in deep contentment, feeling as if he could stay this way forever. This was enough for him - to have her, hold her, to be by her side. Knowing that she loved him and needed him too. He had never dared to hope for so much. Spike found himself surprisingly and deeply grateful.

Buffy snuggled into his chest with a drowsy little hum. He smiled.

“Feeling better, Kitten?”

“Mmmm.”

“ Is that a ‘yes’?” He asked chuckling.

“ Mmmhmm.”

She nodded comfortably, not bothering to open her eyes.

“Bet I know what would make you feel even better…” He enticed, fishing for a response from the sleepy girl at his side. She peeled one eye open to look at him.

“ Hmmm…chocolate?” She asked hopefully.

“ Nope.”

She sat up slightly, curiosity piqued.

“ Um…Frivolous shoe buying?”

“ No.” He laughed.

Buffy seemed to consider her next guess thoughtfully;

“ How ‘bout multiple orgasms?”

“ No – well actually, now that you mention it…”

And he rolled her on her back and began kissing her neck.

“ Wait – you WEREN'T gonna say sex?” She asked, shocked.

He shook his head and went immediately back to nibbling her ear.

“ No, but I like your idea much, much better.”

And his hand wormed its way under her shirt to molest her further.

“ Then what were you gonna say?” She asked, trying to ignore his attempts at seduction.

He was busy unbuttoning her blouse.

“ Hmmm?”

And kissing her belly.

“ Spike?”

*Oooo, lookit all the goodies…*

He just loved that sheer bra, it showcased her gorgeous tits perfectly.

“ Mmmmm.”

He nuzzled a nipple with deep affection.

“ Spike!” She gave him a playful shove. “TELL me!”

*Stubborn bint can’t ever let a bleedin’ thing go…*

“ Alright, alright!” He groused. “ Quit yer pushin’ and I’ll tell ya.”

“So?” She looked at him expectantly. Spike sighed and pulled himself off of her, sitting back on the bed.

“ Impatient little chit…” He grumbled, only half-serious. “I was GOIN' to say patrol.”

“ Ooo! Patrol...” And she got that malevolent gleam in her eye that meant death to evildoers everywhere.

“ So you like patrol better than sex with me, eh?” He pouted.

She gave him an indulgent smile and crawled into his lap.

“ Silly vampire, NOTHING is better than sex with you and you know it.”

He seemed unconvinced.

“ Even though we haven’t actually…” He trailed off, looking fretful.

*How cute is this? Insecure Spike – who knew?*

“ Yes, even though we haven’t actually.” She reassured him. Looping her arms around his neck she looked him in the eye. “Spike, Sweetie – how can you not know that you’re the best I’ve ever had? It took half an hour for my toes to uncurl this morning.”

He narrowed his eyes at her petulantly.

“Just this morning?”

“ And this afternoon and probably tonight at least twice.”

She kissed the tip of his nose.

“ Only twice?” He asked, pushing it.

“ Oh my GOD, you are the absolute worst!” She hit him with the nearest pillow.

“ You love it, Baby.” He gave her his patented sexy smirk, tongue curling to touch his front teeth.
“ Who’s the Big Bad, eh?” And he pushed her back down on the bed by slow-crawling up her body.

“ More like a Big Bad pain in my ass.” She grumbled, trying not to give in.

He raised a wayward brow at her.

“ That could be arranged, Love…”

“ Oh!” She huffed, rolling him off of her. “You’ve got the dirtiest mind ever!”

“ Yeah.” He flashed her his cockiest grin. “Ain’t it great?”

Buffy couldn’t help it, she burst out laughing.

“You’re incorrigible.”

“ So I’m told.” He crooked his finger at her with a sly smile. “Now c’mere an’ kiss me.”

“ Alright, but only for a minute. Then I’m dragging your bad ass out on patrol.”


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


‘A minute’ turned into a half-hour makeout session which Buffy could not bring herself to regret in the least – in spite of her eagerness to get out on patrol. She was itchy for some action of the violent variety - it was the one area she was feeling deprived these days.

She was surprised to find how content she was at the moment actually. Given her current circumstances she should be climbing the walls. Yet here she was happy as can be, still pleasantly buzzing from the after-effects of Spike’s kisses.

*And hands. Don’t forget the hands.*

The man was damn talented - passionate and skilled as she could ever hope for in a lover. Not to metion sweet, thoughtful and romantic...How did she get so lucky?

*Who knows? Who cares? As long as he’s mine.*

She smiled with genuine pleasure at that. He was hers, as she most definitely was his. In the midst of a very chaotic life, this was the one thing that made sense. It was kinda amazing really, that in the middle of this whole mess they should find their way to each other.

“ I love you you know.” She said seriously, looking up at him from her place at his side.

“Yeah?” He asked, still surprised and pleased to hear it. He stopped in front of her and took her in his arms. “ Love you too, Princess.”

“ I like it when you call me that.” She said, moving in for a kiss.

“ S’what you are.” He replied huskily. “ My Princess, My Queen.”

She twined her arms around his neck pulling him closer.

“Careful. That sounds like pedestal talk, Mister.” She smiled and kissed him again. “I’ve been known to fall from pedestals…”

“ Well then. I promise only to raise you high enough…” He grinned, pausing for the punchline;
“ So’s I can look up your skirt.”

She giggled at him prettily and he took her hand to kiss it.

“ C’mon now, Queenie – let’s go find you somethin’ to slay.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith had been looking for him for almost an hour, and she was starting to get worried.
What if he left town already? And then she’d never be able to tell him she loved him… He wasn’t in his crypt, or in any of the cemeteries she’d looked at. Panicky spurts of adrenaline started to fire into her belly.

*Fuck! What if I lost him now?*

That sickening urge to cry crept in again and she suppressed it brutally.

*No crying! Not now…just shut up and find him.*

Finally she spotted the leather coattails of his signature black duster flying. Looks like somebody had some aggression to burn. She couldn’t help feeling responsible for that somehow.

*Just gotta make up with him - make it right.*

She didn’t want to distract him mid-fight – could be fatal. So she crept up quietly, if he needed help she’d be there, if not she’d wait patiently ‘til he was done. Faith was just enjoying watching him fight for the moment – such a graceful animal. Perfect hunter, perfect killer – perfect for her. She couldn’t wait to get her hands on him again, then she’d REALLY show him what he meant to her.

She smiled at the thought, picturing their reunion. And it’d be different this time. She’d MAKE it different. She’d tell him she loved him and he’d say it right back and it’d be better than before. Real. Right. Better. They were gonna be happy.

Suddenly another pair of fighters moved out from the shadow of the crypt to his right. A good-sized fledge was getting the shit kicked out of him.

By Buffy.

*What the fuck?*

She dusted the vamp in front of her and quickly moved to Spike’s side – helping with the two he’d been working over on his own. They fought in tandem, with a graceful fluidity Faith had never seen before. It was like they were sharing brain waves – the silent communication flowing between them easily. Red hot bolts of jealousy shot through her.

*Calm down. They’re just fightin’. Doesn’t mean a thing.*

Except that it did. Because he never fought with anyone else but her. They were a team. Had been for a while. They were a unit and Buffy was a…

*What was that word Giles used the other day?*

Oh yeah. Interloper. She was interloping her ass all over Faith’s territory.

*Not to mention my man.*

What the fuck was she doing on patrol anyway? Wasn’t she all retired and shit? Happy with her little white bread fiancé and planning her life as the future Mrs.Cleaver? Something was seriously not right here. And she had an evil sneaking suspicion about what it was.

*Please don’t let me be right.*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They finished off the two vamps easily – a measly couple of fledges being no match for a Slayer and Master Vampire out lookin’ for a fight.

“ Well, that was bracing.” Spike brushed the ash from his clothes. “Up for another go, Love?”

“ With you?” Buffy gave him a minxy little smile. “Anytime.”

He grinned back, strolling over.

“ Aren’t we the saucy wench tonight?”

She shrugged casually, wrapping her arms around his waist.

“ You bring it out in me.”

“ Do I now?” His voice dropped to a seductive purr.

“Uh huh.” She nodded.

“ Should I show you what you bring out in me?” He pulled her tightly against him, leaving no doubt about his meaning.

“Mmmm. Definitely.” She replied softly, grinding her hips against his.

He chuckled.

“ Keep it up, Pet - and that’ll be it for patrol.”

She pulled away, giving him a mock-scowl.

“ Tough talk, Sailor.” She put her hands on her hips in an unspoken challenge. “Whatcha gonna do about it?”

“ How ‘bout I drag you back to my crypt and ravage you all night?”

He took a threatening step in her direction.

She smirked, relishing the game.

“ Really think you can wait that long?” She batted her eyes at him innocently.

“ Not bloody likely.” And he pounced at her.

Buffy shrieked giddily and dashed away, laughing. Zipping through the tombstones Spike gave chase, feeling truly alive for the first time in what seemed like decades. For awhile there being un-dead had seemed a helluva lot like being actually dead. But Buffy brought him back again, gave his formerly pathetic unlife purpose and passion.

*Not to mention a healthy dose of lust.*

He grinned wickedly, imagining all the things he’d do to her once he caught her.

But she was too quick for him. Buffy put on a burst of speed and got far enough ahead of him to hide in the shadow of a mausoleum. He tracked her for a little while then came to a halt sniffing the air.

“ Here Kitty, Kitty.”

She stifled a giggle.

He wove gracefully in and out of shadows, looking behind headstones and inside crypts - making a show of searching for her. He could smell her arousal clearly in the night air and it made his mouth water for a taste. Spike licked his lips unconsciously.

“Come out, come out wherever you are…” He sing-songed.

Another muffled snicker gave him her exact location. He walked casually in the opposite direction, pretending to continue his hunt until he was certain he was out of her eye line. Backtracking, he crept up noiselessly until he was directly behind her.

“ Got you now.” He growled, pulling her into his arms.

She screeched, laughing, and pushed him onto his back. Straddling his lap she looked down at him imperiously.

“ Who’s got WHO now?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It took Faith awhile to catch up with them. She couldn’t exactly take off running while she was in stealth mode. She’d lost sight of them a few times, but the burning rage in her gut propelled her forward. She already knew, but somehow she had to see – had to have proof of the thing she just didn’t wanna believe.

Spike was with Buffy.

Maybe he had been for awhile now. Her stomach roiled in angry protest.

*How Long?*

How long had he been lying to her? Cheating on her? Bullshitting her straight to her face? Evil little scenarios played themselves out in her head: Spike leaving her bed to go to Buffy’s, the two of them laughing, kissing, fucking. She shuddered.

After what seemed like an agonizingly long time she found them.

Together.

And it was every bit as bad as she imagined.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike had considerately spread his duster out for her. No one else in the world he’d do that for. But seeing her laid out half naked upon it left no doubt as to the reason why. She was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen and he could not possibly love her more. He felt certain that if he loved her any more his heart would explode inside his chest.

He sighed ruefully.

He couldn’t even berate himself for it.

*As if I had any bloody say in the matter.*

He never would’ve chosen to love a Slayer – never. But now he could hardly remember a time when he didn’t. And he wouldn’t take it back for the world. She held her arms out to him invitingly, waiting for him to join her. He covered her body with his own, unable to resist her charms.

“ You’re so damn beautiful, Buffy.” He kissed the line of her jaw making his way slowly down her neck and into her open shirt.

“Mmmm.” she hummed, responding to his touch “You’re pretty damn gorgeous yourself.”

He looked at her wonderingly. “Really?”

“ As if you didn’t know it, Swagger Boy.”

He laughed at that.

“ Well, I do have a certain image to maintain.” He said, half-serious.

“Not with me.” She replied softly, seeing him true.

He kissed her tenderly then - showing her with mouth and body and hands all that was in his heart.

And for the first time she listened and heard what he’d been saying so silently all along.

His love for her was overwhelming, it was so complete. How could he be so fearless with his heart, when she had been so weak? Teardrops slipped from the corners of her eyes as she kissed him. Tasting them he pulled back, concerned.

“Love, what is it?”

“ I’m just so sorry, Spike.” She whispered.

He looked completely bewildered.

“Why? For what?”

“I waited so long…”

Her tears ran freely down her face.

“Hush…hush now, Kitten.” He pulled her up and into his arms, cradling her against his chest. “It doesn’t matter, none of it matters.”

“ But all the time we lost because of me…”

“ We’re together now – that’s all that counts.” He stroked her hair comfortingly. “Let’s not waste it being sad, eh?”

“You’re right.” She wiped her damp cheeks, snuffling back her tears. “I don’t wanna waste any more time.”

He smiled and kissed the top of her head.

“That’s my girl.”

She sat back, dabbing at her eyes with the cuffs of her shirt and tidying her hair.

“ Thank God I don’t have a mirror – I don’t even wanna see what I look like right now.”

He shook his head.

“ You’ve no idea how bloody gorgeous you are do you?”

“Shyeah” She dismissed. “ No make up, covered in vamp dust, with puffy eyes and a runny nose – and did I mention I’m still wearing yesterday’s outfit?”

He fixed her with a predatory gaze.

“ And yet you still manage to fill me with lust.”

“Really?” She sniffled.

“ Shall I prove it to you?” He raised a scarred eyebrow in challenge.

“Maybe…” She smiled coyly.

He nuzzled her neck.

“ You are my beautiful...”

And dexterously licked that secret spot behind her ear that made her shiver.

“Oh…” She breathed with a shudder.

“Luscious.”

He nibbled on her shoulder and bit her gently where it met her neck.

“ Uhhh..God…”

And laid her back down on his duster.

“Delectable.”

Then kissed her thoroughly until she was out of breath.

“Temptress.” He finished in a jagged whisper.

He moved down her body to attend to her breasts. Suckling each rosy nipple in turn through the sheer, shimmery fabric of her bra.

“ You are My Princess.” He declared, kissing his way down her torso.

“And My Queen.”

He paused to dip his tongue into her belly button.

“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

He looked into her eyes, showing her his sincerity.

“ And I’m goin’ to make sure you never forget it.”

With that he stripped off her jeans, exposing her to the cool night air. But before she had a chance to shiver he was upon her, tongue and fingers everywhere at once driving her out of her mind. No time to think, no room for regret or insecurity. He spread her wide and had his way, telling her all the while how gorgeous, how incredible, how succulent she was.

His words combined with his actions had her under his spell, her body obeying every silent demand.

His tongue beat insistently on her clit, when he added his fingers to her nipples she cried out, her first orgasm taking her by surprise. She came fast and hard, shuddering against him – her hoarse shout piercing the silence of the graveyard.

Spike licked her gently until she came down. Planting a small kiss on her neatly trimmed curls he crawled up her body to nuzzle her neck.

“That’s a good start, Love.”

“ A good START? No, Spike...” She whimpered, feeling tenderized and sensitive from the activities of the past few days.

His hand slipped between her parted thighs.

“ Oh yes.” He insisted.

And he slid his fingers inside.

“C’mon, Kitten, Know you’ve got more for me.”

“No…too much…” she protested weakly, but arched against his hand when he hit the sweet spot.

“ There’s my girl.” He grinned wickedly, loving this, eager for her pleasure.

He was above her, his cool, bare chest just grazing her nipples as he worked her with his hand. The combined sensations were quickly driving her to the brink. Her body took over for her, mindlessly seeking its release. Her legs wrapped around him as she rode his hand, her fingernails digging into his shoulders painfully, spurring him on.

“ Yeah, that’s it.” He growled his encouragement.

She was so close, she just needed a little push. As if reading her mind (and she was almost certain he could) Spike added his thumb to her clit and ground down on it in rough circles.

“ Come for me, Buffy.” He commanded.

Buffy arched her back, legs clasping and trembling around his waist as she came sputtering his name. He smiled with great satisfaction as he freed his hand, pausing to savor the taste of her on his fingers. God, he loved making her come – the sounds she made, the feel of her, her scent perfuming the air - and her taste; like a sweet peach, like fresh honey. He couldn’t get enough.

“ Ohmygod…” she panted, coming down.

She lay back boneless as a bowl of jell-o in the afterglow. Spike joined her on the duster, wrapping her up in it snugly.

“ How d’ya do that?” She asked lazily, curling against his chest.

“ Do what?”

“Wring every teeny tiny drop of pleasure outta me.”

He grinned smugly.

“It’s a gift.” He kissed her. “Or maybe it’s magic.”

“ Maybe it's both.” She smiled back. “If you practiced the Dark Arts it would explain a lot though.”

He raised a speculative eyebrow at her.

“Yeah? Like what?”

“ Like why I’m so completely under your spell.” She said softly, nuzzling his ear.

“ Thought I was under yours.” He replied, nuzzling back.

“Mmmm, mutual thrall. I like it.”

“C’mere an’ I’ll ‘thrall’ you again.” He slung her leg over his hip, pulling her closer.

“I must obey.” She giggled, throwing her arms around his neck. “I’m helpless against you, you Fiend.”

Playful kissing turned serious as they slipped back into their mutual thrall. Wrapped in the warmth of his duster they were in their own little world, totally oblivious to their surroundings. Feeling his erection prodding her insistently through his jeans, Buffy covered it with her hand and gave it a firm squeeze. Spike inhaled sharply, groaning.

“ Poor Baby. So neglected.” She cooed rubbing his length through the denim.

“ Yer killing me, Love – touchin’ me like that.” He rumbled.

“ What? Like this.” She asked innocently, squeezing his cock again.

“Or like this?” She rubbed it vigorously.

“Or what if I do this?” She asked with a wicked grin, pushing him onto his back. Straddling his hips she ground her naked sex into his groin, knowing it would drive him insane. He gripped her thighs hard and pressed against her with a groan.

“ What do you want, Spike?”

“All ‘f it… everythin’ – you.” He rasped.

“ Everything?” she asked, circling her hips with intent.

“ Oh God…Buffy…” He was about to come in his pants. He could still taste her on his lips and smell her all over him, in the air all around – and the feel of her hot, wet cunt just millimeters away from his cock was more than he could take.

*She’s gonna make me spray my trousers like some nancy schoolboy.*

But he just couldn’t bring himself to stop, he was too close – if she moved like that once more…

She paused for a second, looking at him seriously.

“ Do you… want to?” She asked, suddenly shy.

He groaned.

“God, yes! So bloody much.”

She moved to unzip him, working his jeans down his hips. He stilled her with the touch of his hand. If they were both naked now he definitely would not be able to stop. How he’d held out this long was nothing short of miraculous. Chalk it up to the fact that she kept him so satisfied in every other way.

“But not like this, Buffy.” He sat up gently, looking in her face. “Not on the ground, in the cold…you deserve so much more, Love.”

She caressed his cheek, moved by his tenderness.

“You want it to be special.”

“ I want it to be PERFECT.” He kissed the palm of her hand. “For you.”

“ It will be.” She said, smiling sweetly.

“Now,” She asked, changing the mood. “ Do ya wanna make out or what?”

He gave her a wolfish grin.

“ Oh HELL yeah.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith felt like retching onto the ground, like screaming – like crying forever. Her sense of loss and betrayal was a tidal wave she was about to go down in. She backed away from the unbearable scene before her, stumbling as she went.

Spike’s words rang in her ears;

“ I want it to be perfect – for you.”

She gave into her tears then. He’d never, ever shown that much concern for her. Their first time had been on the cold stone floor in some random crypt one night after patrol. It was quick and brutal, tinged with the desperation of two lonely people hungry for contact. And every time since then echoed that in some way. He never made love to her. Or touched her with reverence. Never called her ‘His Princess’.

“Fuck…” She choked back a sob.

*He never ever loved you. Not once. And he never fucking will.*

Curling up in the shelter of an open tomb she let her pain pull her under until she drowned.


** I like pleasure spiked with pain... he he ;p MmmmMmmm angsty goodness. The tears and recriminations have only just begun...

Stay tuned, True Believers...

*Snuggles to All* xoxoxox Rosie**
Chapter Thirty Six ~ The Very Thought of You by Soul of the Rose
** "Set a course for adventure your mind on a new romance..." Dammit, now I have the Love Boat Theme stuck in my head. :p Sorry about the wait, Guys. These last 2 chapters have been whuppin' my butt. Probably because the storyline is getting so complicated. Plus I have life-explody. But enough excuses, on with the show... **


Chapter Thirty Six ~ The Very Thought of You

“ The very thought of you – and I forget to do,
the little ordinary things that everyone ought to do.
I’m living in a kind of daydream. I’m happy as a king.
And foolish though it may seem, to me that’s everything.
The mere idea of you, the longing here for you.
You’ll never know how slow the moments go until I’m near to you.
I see your face in every flower, your eyes in stars above.
It’s just the thought of you, the very thought of you, my Love.

~ Natalie Cole


They had a lingering goodbye kiss at the door. He hated to let her go, even for a little while. But she did have a point about needing a change of clothes. She’d been wearing the same outfit for almost two days now. One which was now ashy with the remains of several vampires, not to mention a few key streaks of dirt – the latter being entirely his fault. He grinned remembering the fun he’d had making them.

Didn’t mean he had to like letting her leave though – or make it easy for her to do so. Spike pulled her in for another searing kiss, using all his considerable skills to erase the idea of leaving him from her mind. Finally, Buffy untangled herself from his grasp giggling.

“ It’s just for an hour, Grabby Hands. I’ll be right back.”

She smacked the hands in question away playfully. Not to be so easily deterred he deftly avoided her slaps, snagging a belt loop to pull her in to him once again.

“ I know, Love. ” He purred into her ear with a nibble. “I just hate to be without my girl, what can I say?”

That comment made it impossible not to kiss him – and even harder to leave. She finally broke away with a sigh.

“ I’ll be back soon, Baby.” She rested her forehead against his and gave him a small conciliatory kiss.

“ Sure I can’t walk you? Many a nasty’s out on a night like this. An’ I should know.”

He waggled his eyebrows at her suggestively.

“ I think I can handle it.” An amused smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. “Plus, you know we can’t be seen together...not yet.”

He leaned back against the doorframe with a frown.

“ Y’ve no idea how much I hate that, Buffy. I wanna sing it from the rooftops, tell the whole bloody world!” He crossed his arms moodily. “ Not hide you away in the darkness of my crypt.”

“There’s lots of fun to be had in that darkness though.” She caressed his cheek softly, consoling him.

“ I know, I know...” He grumbled. “Now get your sweet little arse outta here before I pounce on it.” He smacked her bottom for emphasis. “ Been waitin’ all day to get you into my bed y’ know.” His voice was a low growl that sent tingles to all her girly parts.

*So…very…tempting…But fresh clothes...makeup…maybe a dash of perfume…*

She did want to look her best for him…and she had a little red dress in her closet that would knock him on his ass.

“ Sorry to keep you waiting, Baby. I’ll be quick – promise. I could skip my shower...”

He made a show of sniffing her;

“Better not.” He grinned.

“Hey!”

“She smells a bit, but she’s got a heart o’ gold.” He quoted in his best John Cleese.

Buffy fixed him with a petulant glare.

“Funny.” She pouted. Spike couldn’t help but smile – he adored her pouty face. Kissing her sweetly protruding lower lip he gathered her into his arms.

“ Awww, Kitten – you know you smell like Heaven t’ me always.” He nuzzled her neck affectionately. “Some places more than others…” and his grabby hands started wandering all over again. He backed her against the doorframe and worked his leg in between her thighs. Kissing her deeply he let his fingers do the convincing for him.

God, he was getting her in just the right spot…

“ Uhhh, Baby…” she breathed. “You’re making it reaaally hard for me to leave...”

“S’not the only thing that’s hard.” He rumbled, pulling her hand down to the bulge in his pants.

“ Spii -iike.” She whimpered, feeling helpless against the power of his sinister charms.

“ Can’t help it, Love.” He murmured, planting cool, wet kisses on her neck. “You drive me bloody crazy.”

“Mutual.” She pulled back to cup his cheeks and rub her nose against his.

He sighed, giving in.

“ Only for a minute?” He asked hopefully.

“ More like an hour.”

He pulled a pouty face of his own.

“Okay, okay! Half an hour. But it means I have to shower here.”

Spike smiled mischievously, visions of naked, soapy fun filling his brain.

“I’ll make it worth your while.” He intoned, his voice laden with a thousand naughty promises.

“ You always do.”

Buffy kissed him quickly then and scooted out of his reach before he tempted her any further.

“Half an hour!”

He called after her. She smiled at him over her shoulder and blew him a kiss, walking faster.

Spike sighed and turned back towards his crypt.

*Always leavin’ me wanting…*

From a distance Faith watched the whole sickening show, murder in her eyes. After her tears were spent she’d found a blistering fury lay beneath them. She’d been used and abused – and she wasn’t the kinda girl to take that shit lyin’ down. Seeing them together like this was only fuel for her fire. Their intimacy spoke volumes – this had obviously been going on for awhile.

*That BITCH. That fucking bitch.*

She just knew something was up with him this morning. He’d been twitchy and strange, spurning her advances …something he’d been doing more and more lately. And God, he’d lied to her, right to her face! Buffy was probably right there, lounging all naked in his bed just waitin’ for him to ditch her.

*Fucking Bitch Buffy.*

Can’t be content to have a perfect family, perfect friends, perfect boyfriend - perfect fucking life.

*No, she had to go and take mine.*

She clenched her jaw to nearly the breaking point, feeling the rage boiling in her guts.

Somebody is gonna pay for this. Somebody’s gonna pay – in BLOOD.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy sighed with contentment as she made her way towards campus, amusing herself by twirling her stake over her open palm. In spite of every crazy thing going on in her life, she really couldn’t help but be happy. She was in love after all – it tended to overwhelm all else.

*Kinda like Spike.*

It was amazing she made it outta there at all. How she resisted him she’d never know. It seemed like they’d done nothing but fool around for 24 solid hours, but still she felt ravenous for more.

*Mmmmm. More Spike.*

She grinned, reminiscing. She was sore in all kinds of places – some she didn’t know previously existed. And they hadn’t even made love yet…

*Which was kinda…wow.*

‘Cause if he was that good with just his hands…

*And that insanely talented mouth…*

Just imagine…

She was struck by a vivid image of them together. His taught, cool body sliding against hers, fevered kisses stealing her breath as he filled her, completed her, made her scream his name…

Her knees felt very weak suddenly. She stopped and took a deep breath, fanning her over-heated face.

Damn. It didn’t take anything anymore…just the thought of him and she was a puddle. Thank God he felt the same. And every kiss and touch told her that he did…

*Mutual thrall is a wonderful thing.*

She couldn’t contain the goofy smile that spread over her face. Life was just too good right now… And wasn’t it a beautiful night? The stars were so very sparkly in the blue velvet sky. And the air smelled crisp and cool, the smoky tang of a far away fire giving it that nostalgic autumn touch. Buffy couldn’t remember a more perfect evening ever.

*Yay for rose-colored glasses.*

She thought with a giggle. Being in love certainly had its perks – it made everything all… shiny. Strolling through campus she hummed to herself, caught up in the giddy sensations of her new love. She made it to the edge of the quad without incident, when suddenly Riley appeared in her field of vision.

*Damn. There goes my happy day.*

“Buffy?” He looked stunned. He had an armful of books – obviously coming from a late night study session at the library. She inwardly cursed her luck.

“Riley…Uh, hi. ” She stumbled. She’d completely forgotten he existed over the past two days.

“What’re you doing out here?” He looked suspicious – not to mention confused.

“ Just heading home actually.” At least she could answer that honestly. He looked her up and down, taking in her disheveled appearance.

“Why are you all dirty? Did something happen?”

She suddenly remembered the stake she’d been twirling and tucked it surreptitiously into her waistband – hoping her jacket would cover it up.

“Was that a stake?”

“What? No.” She answered, just a little too quickly.

“It was – that was a stake! What’re you doing with a stake?” Riley dropped his books on a nearby bench and walked over to her. “ You’ve been patrolling haven’t you?!” He looked absolutely horrified.

Buffy decided denial was the best course of action at this point.

“No…”

“You have…Is that vamp dust??” He pointed to the grayish streaks on her jeans.

“No?”

“Look at you! You’re dusty and dirty and covered with bruises and now you’re LYING to me?”

“Lying’s such a strong word…let’s call it a sin of omission…” She said brightly. He seemed infuriated by her casual manner.

“ What’s going on with you Buffy? You’re acting strange lately.” He didn’t wait for her to answer. “And you’re out on patrol? Why? For what? They don’t even need you anymore…”

That struck a nerve.

*They don’t need me anymore? Ha!*

“ I thought we talked about this.” He crossed his arms authoritatively and stared down at her in displeasure.

“Talked about WHAT?” Her voice took on a hard edge. Riley was really starting to piss her off.

“About you not patrolling anymore!” His voice rose in frustration. “About you giving up this…this lifestyle!” He nearly spat that last word out - as if it left a bad taste in his mouth.

Buffy’d had just about enough.

*What – does he think he’s my DADDY now?!*

“ God, you act like I’m out picking up sailors and smoking crack! I just went out on patrol!”

“So you admit it.” He said triumphantly.

She sighed, feeling tired of this discussion already.

“Yes, fine I admit it. I went out on patrol, I needed it.”

“ Is this why I never see you lately? You’re ditching me to go… kill things?” He looked disgusted. “ And where’s your engagement ring?” He seized her hand. “Why aren’t you wearing it?”

She bit back the vicious retort that sprang to her lips;

*Because I don’t want it cutting into Spike’s skin when he’s fucking me.*

And settled for yanking her hand out of his grasp instead. Not getting an answer, Riley pushed forward, his tone softening; “ I never see you and you never want to touch me anymore …”

He reached a tentative hand out to her and she pulled back without even thinking about it, neatly illustrating his point.

God, she SO did not want to have this conversation right now.

“Why are you doing this, Buffy? It feels like you’re picking being a Slayer over me.”

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes at him. He really didn’t know her at all.

“ Don’t you get it? I don’t have a choice! It’s not something I get to pick – I’m just the Slayer. It’s who I am - who I always will be.”

“But what about us? What about our future?!” He was practically yelling at her now.

Buffy didn’t want to do it this way. She'd planned to sit him down, explain gently – let him down easy. But something about the way he was looming over her and the sharp edge of accusation in his voice…when he reached out and grabbed her arm something inside her snapped.

“Answer me, Buffy!” He demanded, giving her a little shake.

The Slayer inside her just couldn’t let that lie – this man – this human, dared touch her like that. He dare try to control her, command her. On instinct she roughly whipped her arm out of his grip. Before Riley knew what hit him he was lying flat on his ass sprawled in the wet grass, mouth gaping like a startled fish.

Buffy had always held back before, she’d never really let him see her full strength.

Not ‘til now.

She stood trembling, her fists clenched at her sides.

“Don’t you EVER put your hands on me again.” She growled. She was frighteningly close to giving him a show of strength he’d never forget.

“Buffy…I…” He stumbled for an apology.

She put her hand up abruptly cutting him off.

“Don’t. Just don’t.” She took a calming breath and soldiered on – it was long past time to have her say. “ I can’t keep trying to be something I’m not.”

“ We can work this out…”

She shook her head.

“I can’t be what you want me to be, Riley.”

“But, Buffy – Honey…please…”

She found the pain in his big blue eyes didn’t move her at all. They were the wrong color blue, and they had no passion in them.

“No.” She said with granite resolve. “It’s over, Riley. It’s just over.”

She turned to walk away. Pausing she said over her shoulder.

“ I’ll give you back the ring in the morning.” And without even a backward glance she strode off towards the dorms.

Riley sat, stunned as a goldfish dumped into the cold finality of a toilet bowl -

Wondering how in the hell he’d just managed to lose the love of his life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy opened the door to her dorm room with a sigh, worry about what she’d just done beginning to creep in. For a few minutes there she’d felt nothing but relief about unburdening herself of a troublesome relationship. But things were so very complicated, so precariously balanced here and she just might have fucked them all up. She’d forgotten that, forgotten everything in the course of the past few days. Nothing had existed outside of Spike’s arms. When he looked at her the world just stopped and nothing else seemed to matter. She had a sudden pang of longing for him. If he were here they’d talk about it and he would hold her and everything would be better instantly. But he wasn’t – and without his presence to distract her, the reality of her life set in with a resounding thud.

She’s just broken up with someone else’s fiancé, stolen another girl’s boyfriend (and in a way, also her sister.) She was trapped in a world she didn’t belong in - and oh, by the way, apocalypse anyone? Cause there was no way Glory wanted the Key for anything good…

This wasn’t really her life she was messing with, but it sure as hell felt like it was. After all she was the one stuck living it - and who knows for how long?

Buffy plopped down on her bed with a frown.

This wasn’t supposed to be her world. This wasn’t supposed to be her LIFE – but now, somehow it was becoming just that. She never asked to come here, to deal with all of these things – just like she never asked to be the Slayer. But she shouldered the responsibility anyway, ‘cause that’s who she was. She was the go-to girl and she knew how to get things done.

With everything that’d happened in the past week her other life seemed farther and farther away, like it was all a dream she once had. And it seemed less and less likely that she was ever getting back there anyway. It was weird at first, but things were so similar to the world she was used to that she found herself forgetting that this wasn’t it.

It certainly felt like home. All her friends were here, Giles, her mom, Dawn. It was still Earth, the US and Sunnydale. She was still a Slayer, there were still Demons and she knew just exactly how to kill them. Sure Faith was the one on “active duty” – but that could change…She could MAKE it change. In fact, with a little bit of tweaking everything could be exactly the way she wanted it to be.

The best thing was that Spike was here, and they were finally together. She felt whole and complete – in spite of everything. So why fight Fate? Obviously someone wanted her here. And wasn’t she happy? Wasn’t she satisfied? More than she had ever been in her whole life? And she was doing her job, she was becoming the Slayer she was meant to be. All her doubts had been burned away by this whole experience. She knew exactly who she was and what she was meant for. Never had her life’s path been more crystal clear. Maybe that’s why she was brought here in the first place. Other Buffy obviously wasn’t gettin’ it done…

She had a radical thought;

*So why not stay?*

Why not surrender to circumstances she had no control over anyway? Whatever might have been –whatever was, THIS was her life now. Why not embrace it and all the good things that entailed? Was that so wrong? All she had to do was stop trying to get back…

*I can do that.*

And let the Powers that brought her here do the rest. It seemed pretty clear they wanted her to stay. Hell, maybe they wanted her to be happy. Maybe it was her reward for fighting the good fight all these years…

*It could happen.*

Knowing that there was no clear way to return her made it all the easier. She had no control, she wasn’t in charge…And if this was gonna be her life than she was damn well going to make the best of it. Buffy felt much better about dumping Riley suddenly.

*Not like I could stand another minute with that lummox anyway.*

Everything seemed perfectly clear to her.

She was here.

She was happy.

She was staying.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike found himself smiling in a most undignified and definitely non-evil way as he went about tidying up the crypt and preparing for his date with Buffy.

*Ponce.*

He chastised himself, but his sappy grin remained firmly in place. He’d been in love with her forever, it was nothing new - but the fact of her returning said love certainly was. And it was having quite an affect on him. The last time he’d felt anywhere near this ridiculously besotted he was human - still that dithering, ineffectual nancy boy William. Spike was certain he was going to burst into spontaneous couplets any moment now…He just hoped Buffy wasn’t here when he did.

*Don’t wanna drive her away now do we?*

Gathering up the pile of dirty sheets he stopped to breath in the scent of her. She was everywhere now, all over his room, his bed, his clothes. He sniffed at his shirt catching a slight trace of her there. He resisted the temptation to take it off and bury his nose in it. He’d be seeing her soon enough. He could wait… really.

He sighed at his own patheticness.

“You’re gettin’ to be a right sad bastard…” He groused.

To make matters worse his prick was starting to respond to the scent of her. It didn’t take much these days – but then again it never had. He contemplated a quick wank in the shower, but then remembered that was something they were supposed to do together later. He got a nice mental image of her wet, soapy body shoved against the cement wall as he pounded into her – her legs tight around his waist as she moaned, the hot water beating down making her skin slick and rosy with heat.

*Bloody hell.*

How long was a sodding half hour anyway?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy gathered her things and sprinted back in record time - she didn’t want to waste a moment now that she was so sure of what she wanted. She couldn’t wait to tell Spike what she’d decided…he would be so happy. She just knew they’d find a way to keep her here, and then they’d never have to be apart again. Thank God – ‘cause she was missing him already. She couldn’t believe how long a half hour away from him seemed.

*This is getting ridiculous.*

But she couldn’t help smiling. It was nothing short of a miracle that she could find so much happiness. She’d started to lose hope that it would ever happen for her – that she’d ever love someone this much and be loved in return. This life of darkness and bloodshed had her thinking no man could ever fit in it… Interestingly enough, no man did. She smirked. Only Spike. And she was pretty sure he was his own category.

Buffy entered without knocking, already feeling that Spike’s place was her second home. She set her duffle down next to the battered sofa – pleased to see how much he’d done to make it nice for her. The room had been thoroughly cleaned and swept and the couch covered with a simply throw, hiding its lifetime of abuse. Some of the fresh flowers from downstairs had been moved to the small side table and several candles dotted the room giving it a warm and inviting glow.

*He really is the sweetest thing ever.*

She was deeply touched by his efforts to make her feel at home. Especially knowing he’d never done so for anyone else. This was his own place, his manly fortress o’ solitude and he was welcoming her in without reservation. It made her love him even more.

So many years she’d spent on the outside of Angel’s life - never being let in, only given a taste and holding on to dreams that never came true. But in their first hour, their first day –
Spike had given her full access to himself and all that he had.

Thinking about it filled her with terrible longing. She made a dash for the lower level ladder ready to jump in his arms and stay there until someone physically pried her loose.

Spike kicked the pile of laundry into submission in the makeshift closet. He wanted it out of the way for now, everything had to be just right. He wanted tonight to be perfect for his girl. He loved to think of her that way, it made him smile idiotically all over again. Turning around he caught her scent strong in the air, her heartbeat sounding rapidly in his ears and he broke into an unabashed grin of delight.

“That was the longest bloody half-hour…”

Looking at him, she was unable to contain the rush of emotions inside her.

“IwannastaySpike.” The words came tumbling out without preamble.

“What? What d’ya mean?” Somehow he wasn’t quite getting this, and felt certain he’d walked into a conversation already in progress.

“ I want to stay right here with you.” She said, more carefully this time.

“Tonight?” His forehead wrinkled to his hairline in his confusion.

“Forever.”

He gaped at her, not at all prepared for that statement. She took both of his hands in her own.

“ I want this - I want us, and I don’t want to lose it.”

It was the only selfish thing she had ever asked for.

Spike stood in astonished silence, jaw hanging.

“Say something.” She fidgeted, starting to get worried. This wasn’t exactly the reaction she was hoping for.

He stared at her for a long moment before finally scooping her up into his arms.

“Buffy…Love…you’ve got no idea what this means t’ me.”

She wanted to stay, she chose him – over everything.

He kissed her breathless, the tears standing out in his eyes.

*She chose me...*

He still couldn’t believe it – it was more than he dared to even wish for. He knew what her circumstances were, what weighty responsibilities lay on her small shoulders. But here she was making a stand – for him.

“ Baby…I…” He choked. “I don’t have words...” He stared at her awestruck.

“Just show me, Spike.” She whispered, her eyes searching his face. “I need you to show me.”

Being a man of action, that suited him just fine.

He tucked his arm underneath her knees and carried her like a new bride over to his bed. The symbolism of this was not lost on either of them - in ways beyond empty churches and hollow vows they were seeking their union.

He laid her down gently, and set about divesting her of her clothes. Spike was amused to find himself unbuttoning the very same shirt he’d undone more than half a dozen times already. Buffy had been in such a hurry she hadn’t gotten around to changing her clothes. She caught the ghost of his smile and grinned sheepishly, guessing at what he was thinking.

“I really do have other clothes, I swear… I just …couldn’t wait to see you.”

She blushed rather becomingly, making her look all the more dear to him in that moment.

“S’alright, Love. I’d much rather see you in nothin’ anyway.”

He caught his breath as her breasts were slowly revealed. He’d seen them this way many, many times by now, but was always stunned at the sight.

“ So very beautiful, My Girl...” he murmured.

Buffy smiled up at him shyly and rose to tug at his own shirt. Obediently he pulled it over his head and tossed it to the floor. He stood before her pale as marble in the half light, candle flame painting him in flickering shades of gold. She sat back drinking in the sight of him, quite stunned herself.

Spike was somehow still surprised to see his own adoration reflected back to him in her eyes.

*How could such loveliness be mine?*

Unworthy and undeserved…she was so far above his sullied, monstrous self. But here she was all the same. And she loved him, she wanted him – she bloody well chose him.

He knew exactly how the Beast felt when he won his Beauty.

“I love you, Buffy…do you know that? Do you feel it?” He knelt before her, voice an urgent whisper.

“ Yes.” She caressed his face gently. “Do you know how much I love you?”

“ Sometimes.” A small self-depreciating smile curled up the corner of his mouth. “I can still hardly believe it…”

“ Don’t ever doubt it, Spike.” She said earnestly. “This is the biggest thing I’ve ever felt.”

“ Bigger than…Angel?” He couldn’t look at her, too afraid of what her answer might be. His self-doubt so large inside him he felt it might eat him alive.

She kissed his sweet mouth then, and filled her kiss with the full intensity of her love and passion for him. When she released him he looked dazed and gave her a slightly drunken smile.

“More than anything or anyone ever.” Buffy looked into his eyes. “Do YOU feel it?”

He gave her a roguish sideways grin.

“Yeah.” And pounced from his spot between her knees to kiss her hungrily, pushing her back onto the bed.

“ My girl.” He growled possessively. She felt the tingling shocks deep in her belly at his words. “Mine.” He verbally asserted the claim he’d felt in his heart for years.

“ Yours.” She said simply and surrendered herself to him without a fight. He kissed her fiercely, all the need inside him unleashed at last. So many years of wanting, of feeling second best to every unworthy bastard in his way… But he had her now, and he was damn well never letting go.

Tugging at her jeans he flipped open the button with a smooth one-handed flick.

*No knickers.*

Spike smiled to himself. They’d been in his pocket since their first tryst this morning.

*Not bloody likely she’ll be gettin’ those back.*

Her light jacket and blouse joined his black t-shirt on the bedroom floor. Sliding the straps of her bra smoothly off her shoulders he made mental plans to add it to the collection he was starting of her pilfered underthings. He had some bloody grand memories of that bra…

At her side he caressed her torso from collar bone to hip in a smooth gliding stroke. Between her breasts then over them, her sides, her stomach – worshipping her skin.

As his fingers trailed over her belly he grazed a sensitive spot making her flinch and giggle.

“Oooo, looky what I found…” He shot her a wicked grin, indicating exactly how much trouble she was in now.

He pursued the tickley spot with experimental digs and pokes until he was rewarded with a shriek of laughter from Buffy.

“ Hey, quit that!”

“ Never.” He pledged, laughing. “ This is far too much fun.”

Straddling her thighs he dug unto her ribs until she was squealing in hysterics.

Finally she rallied for a defensive attack, pinching his sides and poking his belly in retaliation. He squirmed and giggled until he fell sideways off of her lap. She pounced on this sudden vulnerability by attacking his belly button with agile swirls of her fingers. When he was helpless with laughter she dealt him the final blow by socking him over the head with a large pillow.

“Hey now…” he wheezed. “ That’s fighting dirty.”

“Yep.” She agreed and promptly whomped him again.

“Oh, yer in for it now, Summers.”

And he threw himself into the fray with gusto. A simple pillow fight quickly degenerated into all out war. Buffy dealt him alternating blows with two feather pillows. Spike retaliated by sneaking in tickles between wallops with his own. After a particularly sound smack upside the head from Buffy he grabbed a pillow in each hand and banged them together like a pair of cymbals around her head. His move was so effective it ended the fight in an explosion of feathers ,the poor pillow being unable to withstand the stress of an overzealous vampire at play.

Buffy gaped at him in shock, tiny white feathers settling in her hair and on her shoulders, drefts of them gathering around her knees. Spike couldn’t help it, she looked so completely nonplussed, so thoroughly comical that he burst out laughing. She gave him a goofy smile and began brushing the fluff off her head. She was such a sad sight he took pity on her.

“C’mere you.”

She trundled over on her knees and sat in front of him obediently. Smiling down at her with affection he proceeded to divest her of the snowy white coating of down, feeling like the patient father of an adored but wayward child.

“There you are, Sweet Bit – all better.” He kissed the tip of her nose.

She returned his smile and surprised him by pulling him in for a lingering kiss. Spark turned to flame in a fraction of an instant as his natural desire for her took control. He had her on her back a second later, pert breasts smashed against his chest as her legs wound around his waist. Her sweet hot flesh, the slickness of her mouth, the smell of her desire for him tickling his nose… he couldn’t wait any longer. He had to have her NOW. He pulled back just enough to locate her zipper, fully intending to rip it open if it gave him even a second of trouble. It slid easily down, fortunately for her wardrobe.

From the bowels of Buffy’s purse her phone rang.

Spike hung his head with a groan of supreme frustration.

“Not again, Pet…” he growled.

“ It’s probably Riley…” She sighed irritably, wishing she’d remembered to turn ithe damn thing off.

His growl became an indignant snarl.

She smiled indulgently, secretly loving his possessiveness.

“ Relax, Baby.” She soothed him, stroking his back. “He’s calling because I dumped him on his ass.” She reached for her purse. “Literally.”

Spike raised an eyebrow at her, suddenly interested in this new turn of events.

“ Oh yeah?”

“ Yeah. I didn’t get a chance to tell you yet – but I left the lunk flat on his butt in the quad.”

He snickered smugly.

“ I woulda liked to see that.” He smirked.

Buffy dug for her phone fully intending to turn it off for the night.

She flipped it over to read the Caller ID.

“Dammit! It’s Giles…probably with some more ‘happy news for Buffy’. I’ll get rid of him quick. “ She patted his leg in reassurance. “Promise.”

Spike sighed, preparing to keep his peace. He knew better than to come between a Slayer and her Watcher. Besides, they had the rest of the night, now didn’t they?

“ Hi, Giles – what’s up?” she asked breezily.

“ Buffy?” His voice was thick with fear.

“ What? What happened?” The concern on her face brought Spike to her side instantly.

“It’s Dawn – she’s gone.”

“What?! Whaddaya mean gone?” Her voice rose in panic.

She had a horrifying flash of Glory with her hands around her sister’s pale throat. She shook her head to clear it.

*Gotta focus…*

“She’s been taken, Buffy.”

Whatever Glory did, she could fight it - she’d find a way. And Spike would help her, and the gang. No one would let anything happen to Dawnie…Giles voice cut through the din of her racing thoughts;

“ It was Faith.”


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been sitting there, the wet grass soaking into the seat of his pants. Riley was too busy trying to make sense of the events of the last week. He’d lost her somewhere. He didn’t know how – but he had. But if there was a how, there was a why – and there were clues in there somewhere that would lead him to both.

As always, he thought of Buffy as a mystery to be solved – and he was just the man to do it. With patience and careful study he could figure anything out. With tenacity and skill there was nothing he couldn’t attain. He’d learned that a long time ago.

It was time to bring some of those good old Initiative tactics back into play.

*Step one – acquire target.

Check.

Step two – Collect information.

Follow her. Learn her habits, associates, and whereabouts at all times.*

He was certain that if he studied the data from a detached and clinical view he could discover what went wrong, and therefore fix it.

Buffy was The One. He’d been sure about it since their very first kiss. She was his girl – his future wife. So they’d had one stupid little fight?

*So what?*

Riley Finn never gave up on anything that easily.


** Oooo, now that sounds sinister, don't it? Whatever will happen next? At least you got a nice, long...update. The chapters are going to be longer from now on, I'm trying to pack a lot into each one. Hope it was worth the wait :)

I also want to take a moment to thank everyone who voted for me - I did managae to win a few awards, which is like..WOW. I'm so blown away, I was up against so much talent.

LCCT won Best WIP & was honored with Judges Choice at the Lost in Spike Awards.

And also won Best Fluff & Most Original Storyline (!!) at the Love Bite Awards.

Thank you all for your support. You'll never know how much it means to me, seriously.

Now get outta here before I get all teary :)

*Big, Big Loves To All* Rosie xoxoxox**
Chapter Thirty Seven ~ Trouble's Comin' Like a Train by Soul of the Rose
** Didja miss me? I missed you... I deeply apologize for the lack of updates. That stupid RL thing was taking up all my time again. *Kicks real life* But I swear I AM going to finish this & I will be updating again soon. Chapter 38 is already half-way written. Thanks for your patience, everyone :)

Thanks also to the lovely & talented Isabella who beta-ed this for me & suggested the song title & to Brat for her support & in-put all along the way.

I must have a massive group hug now.

*Snuggles* xoxoxox Rosie **




Chapter Thirty Seven ~ Trouble’s Comin’ Like a Train


“Woke up on the wrong side this morning thunder rolling in my brain.
Walked into an empty closet didn't find a thing
Trouble's comin' like a train.
Someone said she met a stranger lucky I don't know his name -
The way I feel I've got a mind to share some of my pain.
Trouble's comin' like a train,
Trouble's comin' I can feel it way down in my bones.
Trouble is I never fail to derail when I'm left alone.
Callin' out my name trouble's comin' like a train.
Played my heart just like a joker lost it to the queen of pain -
Now she's holding all the aces I'm out of the game.
Trouble's comin' like a train…”

~ Mark Collie


Riley was surprisingly calm for a man who had not only been dumped, but also knocked to the ground by his bride-to-be that very evening. He set his pile of books and study guides on his desk, taking care to arrange them neatly before changing his clothes. He knew exactly what to wear; he still had all of his gear. You never knew when you might need it. He suited up for night ops, tucking his face mask into his back pocket for later. He wouldn’t need a weapon for this maneuver – but the infra-red goggles, logbook and voice-activated recorder were a necessity. He tucked a few stakes and a hunting knife into his uniform for safety’s sake. It always paid to be cautious in Sunnydale.

Within ten minutes he was back outside, hunting his quarry.

Fortunately he knew exactly where to find her.

She was his fiancée after all.

Riley crept up the hall towards Buffy and Willow’s room, falling back behind the corner when he saw the door open. He pushed himself silently along the wall and further into the darkness when he heard her enter the corridor. He knew it was Buffy; he’d memorized every little thing about her – right down to the sound of her footsteps.

She seemed in a hurry and preoccupied which worked in his favor. He was fully aware of her capabilities as a Slayer; he would have to be on his guard during this operation. He made a notation on his recorder after she had gone out of sight.

“2100 Hours - Target has left home base, carrying large duffle. Have not established destination.”

He waited for a few seconds before resuming his tail, following her several paces behind. He made note of the large duffle slung over her shoulder and felt a surge of gratitude. It meant she needed the comfort of her own home - that she was hurting too and that gave him a window of opportunity. One he could pry open all the way into a swift reconciliation. It was ridiculous for them to spend any time apart really - they were Soul Mates. Why should they suffer through unnecessary separation?

Under the cover of his facemask he smiled.

*Soon, Buffy. Soon...*

Riley stalked his prey across the quad and out into the night. He wasn’t surprised when she detoured through a cemetery, she probably had some issues to work off and wanted to patrol. He’d cure her of that habit soon enough. That wasn’t the way one’s wife should behave. But she’d be too busy with the children and the house to think about that before long. He smiled dreaming of the life they’d have. It was all going to be perfect.

He was so caught up in his daydreaming that he almost missed her ducking inside a crypt. Now that was curious, was she changing clothes? Was there a demon inside he couldn’t sense from here? He held back for a few minutes, expecting her to reemerge at any moment.

*It wouldn’t do to run into her now would it?*

After five full minutes he decided to risk a peek. What if she were hurt? What if she needed him? The mental image of her pinned underneath a hungry vampire spurred him on. Cautiously he crept toward the mausoleum. Risking a look through one of the windows he was surprised to find a fully furnished living room. There were flowers, candles, some furniture – but no Buffy.

*What the heck?*

He studied the room corner to corner before deciding to risk entry into the building. There was no one in it, demon or human. Riley began to worry. There was dreadful evil in this town; he’d seen unbelievable things here. He had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. Something was happening in there – something awful.

He crept through the door to the crypt in full stealth mode, mask down, stake at the ready and listening carefully for any sound that might hint at what was happening. At last he heard voices – Buffy was talking to someone… He let out a quiet sigh of relief - at least she didn’t sound hurt. Wait - was that a man’s voice? Something about it was familiar. Searching the room thoroughly he finally found the hole in the cement floor that served as an entrance to the lower level. He could see flickering light & the ladder leading down but not much else from here.

Riley pondered his options for a few minutes. Should he follow her? She sounded okay, she wasn’t in any danger that he could perceive. It wasn’t right to go eavesdropping… But wasn’t this whole mission about gathering information on Buffy? Finding out everything he could? Maybe this conversation would give him some insight into their problems… He made an executive decision. Securing his stake and various bits of paraphernalia he slowly lowered himself flat to the floor and poked his head into the hole. He was surprised to be peering down on a rather elegant looking bedroom. A large, ornately carved dresser stood against one wall; there were Persian-style carpets on the floor – and several candles and bouquets of flowers added to the romantic atmosphere. Ignoring his own curiosity, he focused on the mission at hand.

*Where is Buffy?*

Riley Finn was in no way prepared for the sight that greeted him. In the middle of the large, king-sized bed was his fiancée - writhing on satin sheets… with Spike. He balked at the scene before him, mind unable to process this new insanity. Spike hovered above a half-naked Buffy, who opened her arms to him invitingly.

Riley felt the color drain from his face when he heard them speak again;

“My girl.” Spike growled possessively. “Mine.”

There was no mistaking the look of happiness on her face, or the love in her voice when she replied, quite simply;

“Yours.”


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Faith was holed up in a dingy motel on the outskirts of town. It was all she could think to do in her current state of panic. She’d told her sister it was for her own good, Glory was on the loose and out looking for them. She’d bought it and kept quiet for several hours, but now Dawn was starting to ask questions;

Why weren’t the others here?

Shouldn’t they be trying to meet up with them?

Weren’t they in danger too?

It was getting on her already frazzled nerves. For a split second she regretted taking her – maybe she’d be better off alone… But the thought passed in an instant. She loved Dawn so much, like nobody else. She was her only family. And it didn’t matter one damn bit where she came from – they were blood, and they were sisters. And NO ONE was taking her away.

*Let ‘em try.*

She thought grimly. They’d find out quick just how nasty she could be. She’d shove a stake in the first person that tried to lay hands on Dawn. And she knew just how to make it hurt.

*Don’t have to kill ‘em to make ‘em stop.*

A broken kneecap, a shattered hand – ten pounds of pressure applied just so and they were outta the game. That suited her fine. She’d been making nice for far too long now. Played the good girl – and where'd that get her?

*Fuckin’ nowhere.*

She shoulda known. They all turned on her the instant Buffy came back into play. Giles keeping secrets, the gang plotting to take Dawn and give her to Buffy. And she’d lost Spike.

*More like he got taken.*

That nasty, manipulating little bitch got her hands on him – who knows when. For all she knew Buffy’d been after him from the start. They coulda been together for months now. The thought turned her stomach. Did he lie to her from the first night? No he couldn’t have, not Spike… He wasn’t like that. She’d looked into his eyes too many times…

But ugly doubt crept in. She knew what Buffy was - what she was capable of. God, she was so sick of that bitch. Always playing it up nice, actin’ all perfect. Faith grabbed a smoke from the pack of Luckys in her jacket pocket & lit up with an unsteady hand. She’d had enough of her little superhero routine. Who did she think she was anyway - Wonder Woman? Didn’t Buffy feel the darkness inside her too? The black place where the power came from beat inside Faith like a drum, it called to her. It told her she was different – special. Something beyond superheroes. The normal rules didn’t apply here – when was Buffy gonna GET that?

*Fucking never.*

The worst thing was how hypocritical she was. She acted like a fuckin’ angel but there she was stealing Spike away. Cheating on her fucking fiancé and lying to her friends to do it. It made Faith sick to think that Spike could buy that fake ass act of hers. That he would even WANT that.

*Why do they always want that??!!*

Was she so tainted, so fucked up that Buffy seemed better by comparison? Her guts twisted inside her and she swiped angrily at the tear escaping from the corner of her eye. Buffy had gotten to him, had turned him against her before she had a chance to show him how it good it could be. Buffy took him away, just like she was trying to take Dawn...

*NOT gonna happen.*

No matter what it took - if she had to kill some folks, so be it. And if she had to kill Buffy - well, that was just a bonus.

Family was worth fighting for.





** Ooowee, is it gettin' dark around here or what? I sense some good ass kickings on the wind... Stay tuned, True Believers. More to come very soon (promise!) *Big Loves* Rosie **
Chapter Thirty Eight ~ Hopelessly Devoted to You by Soul of the Rose
** Yup. Believe it. I managed to whip out another chapter for you in less than 3 months this time...Go me. And, it's a good one. Just be forewarned - yer not gonna like it he he he ;p **




Chapter Thirty Eight ~ Hopelessly Devoted to You


Guess mine is not the first heart broken,
My eyes are not the first to cry.
I’m not the first to know
There’s just no getting over you.

You know I’m just a fool who’s willing
To sit around and wait for you.
But, baby, can’t you see
There’s nothing else for me to do?
I’m hopelessly devoted to you…

But now there’s nowhere to hide
Since you pushed my love aside.
I’m out of my head
Hopelessly devoted to you.

My head is saying, fool, forget it.
My heart is saying, don’t let go.
Hold on till the end.
And that’s what I intend to do
I’m hopelessly devoted to you…”

~ Olivia Newton John




Riley felt unsteady, nauseous…the roller coaster ride of the past few hours had spun his world off its axis and dropped him neatly on to his head. Overwhelmed by the revolting scenarios flooding his brain, he couldn’t seem to right himself or find his footing. The images flashed like scenes from some sickening movie he was too weak to get up from;

Spike and Buffy, writhing together like snakes on slick satin sheets. His mouth on her mouth, on her neck, her sweet flesh - places his own mouth had only recently been. Riley ground his fists into his eyes viciously, trying to erase these mad visions. But they played on like some crazy film strip looped over and over again.

“My girl. MINE.”

That THING had claimed her as its own…

And she had accepted it. His Buffy…his girl… accepted the claim of a monster.

“Yours.”

She had said it so softly, a lover’s sigh. It made him feel sick, remembering.

The horrifying scene had sent him scrambling from the crypt, his mind unable to process what it meant. He still couldn’t fully grasp it.

It wasn’t real.

It COULDN'T be real…

But it was.

It happened; he had seen the whole stomach-churning show live and in person.

Riley had never felt so lost in his whole life. Without her he was rudderless. She was his rock, his everything. The tears started up again and he swiped at them, ashamed. He was walking now, wandering without purpose – roving through the woods trying vainly to clear his head.

It couldn’t be over. He couldn’t have lost her…not to HIM. Not to a goddamned demon, a thing that had no soul. It didn’t make any sense! He pictured Spike’s hands on her silky skin, his mouth at Buffy’s throat – too easy to imagine him sliding his fangs in, while Buffy moaned in enjoyment. The Initiative had taught him all about temptations in the field. Vampires were seductive beasts, their fangs dealt pleasure as well as pain. He’d heard of women having multiple orgasms from a single bite. He gave a low growl of fury at the thought.

He'd never really hated another person before, not truly. He wasn’t raised that way. But all he could think about now was hurting Spike, making him pay. His desire for vengeance consumed him with a slow fire.

God help the demon who crossed his path tonight.

He had rage to burn.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy’s mind was racing – head full of scenarios too grim to speak of. She remembered Wesley’s battered face, and his account of the torment he’d suffered – all at the hands of the woman currently holding her baby sister.

Fury and terror battled it out in her system until she felt dizzy. Spike was the only thing keeping her going right now. He’d taken over and organized her scattered self into action. He made her change her clothes before rushing out the door, quite logically pointing out her disheveled state, which clearly indicated she’d been patrolling - among other things. He was also quick enough to give her a cover story explaining why he was accompanying her to the Magic Box.

“Remember, Pet - you met me on the way there. I was out on patrol. Got it?”

She nodded solemnly, trying to remember not to lean on him too much, or go to him in tears in front of the others. There was a good reason why they were keeping their relationship a secret – she just couldn’t remember what it was at the moment…

Spike stopped them just outside the door to the shop.

“Are you all right, Love?” He studied her face intently, she’d been unnaturally quiet since the phone call and it was worrying him.

Buffy clung tightly to his upper arms, digging her fingers into the soft leather of his coat. She had no way to express the sick fear inside her. That Faith could…that she might…

*“Now, we've only done one of the five basic torture groups. We've done blunt, but that still leaves sharp, cold, hot, and loud. Have a preference?”*

The images in her head… the blood. The things Wesley had told them. He had dutifully relayed every word and deed to Giles, his internal Watcher’s imperative to record far too ingrained to be forgotten now. That particular quote had haunted her. Faith was an unknown quantity, no telling what she might actually do. But Buffy knew just exactly what she was capable of.

Spike saw the emotions play across her face and pulled her swiftly into his arms. Cradling her head against his chest he stroked her hair, whispering to her.

“ It’s alright, Love – Spike’s got you now. I won’t let ‘er hurt the Nibblet. Not ever.”

Buffy wept into his shirt. He’d said it out loud, he’d spoken her fears. It broke through the mass of confusion and disjointed terror she was feeling and she finally let herself cry. Tears streamed down her face as she clung to him.

“ She could KILL her, Spike! You don’t know her like I do…you don’t know what she’s already done…”

He stroked her back gently, soothing her.

“ Remember, Pet - she isn’t your Faith.” He said logically. “You’ve said it yourself – things are different here. And the Faith I know would never hurt Dawn.”

She grimaced, not wanting to be reminded of his… whatever-it-was with the other Slayer. But she allowed herself to be comforted by the thought.

It was all she had.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Faith stared listlessly out the window, forgotten cigarette burning in her hand. She felt as cold and dead as a frozen stone. Dawn was the only thing keeping her going right now. Her sister remained annoyingly cheerful despite their circumstances. Dawn was currently engrossed in a particularly catty episode of Dismissed, happily munching Cheetos and guzzling coke, oblivious to the world and all its horrors.

*Thank God for motel cable.*

Even this rat hole had MTV. Faith had distracted her from her earlier questioning by switching on the tube. God, it was simple to be 15. She missed that. Even being a Slayer had been easier back then. She’d seen the world in such uncomplicated terms. Want. Take. Have.

*Fuck. If only it could be that easy with Spike.*

In the beginning it was - not like it was hard to want what he had to offer. What’s not to like? His skin tight jeans, the chiseled jaw, those heart-stopping blue eyes - Spike was the total package. And unlike Miss Tightass Buffy, she didn’t give a damn that he was a vamp. It made a weird kinda sense actually. She felt instinctively there was a kindred spirit there. They shared a common darkness.

Plus – superhero sex? Fuckin’ hot. Best ever actually. They’d trashed more than a few motel rooms together. Of course they had to tone it down when they were at home…

*Home.*

That word seemed so removed from her right now. It had no meaning without friends, without family…or love. Their little ramshackle apartment had felt like a home once. She remembered Dawn laughing at the sink splashing Spike with soapy water as they did the dishes. A small tear trickled from the corner of her eye. She blotted it away with the sleeve of her denim jacket. She didn’t want Dawn to see her cry. There would be time for tears later. Alone in the shower tonight she would weep - for all she had lost and all she would never, ever have…

Because Buffy took it all away.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


She clung to Spike for a few more precious moments, knowing they would have to distance themselves once inside. He hugged her fiercely before letting her go, reassuring her wordlessly of his presence and support. She wiped her eyes & straightened her clothes, shifting gears into stoic Slayer-mode once again. Buffy never realized how much time she spent that way – not until she allowed herself to love him. She was thankful she didn’t have to carry it all alone any longer, there was someone to stand by her side. It struck her in that moment just how much she trusted him.

She looked up and really saw Spike - the man that loved her with all his heart, the partner who had her back in all things and the warrior who would defend her past death into dust. She reached for his hand and squeezed it, feeling deeply grateful for his presence.

“I’m never letting you go.” She said quietly.

He shot her a cocky grin - signature Spike. It made her smile for the first time in almost an hour.

“Count on it, Love. Yer stuck with me.”

She kissed him once, softly and then allowed him to lead her inside, holding onto his hand until the last possible second.

Giles stood at the counter talking with Willow & Xander, faces grim.

He turned their way at the sound of the small brass door bell, “I’m glad you’re here, Buffy…” He smiled distractedly. “I see you’ve found Spike, good.”

That was a surprise. They’d expected more questions about his sudden appearance.

“Perhaps the two of you can explain the content of this letter.” He continued, frowning.

Buffy and Spike exchanged a confused look.

“What letter?”

“The one Faith left for me.”


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


The more Faith thought about it the more she realized it was true;

It all came down to Buffy.

All her troubles, all her pain rested on the shoulders of the world’s tiniest Slayer. Faith always found that irritating – perfect little Barbie-girl, so petite. So pretty and blonde, with her teeny little manicured hands and those eensy little outfits. Gag.

*Skinny little bitch.*

Why would Spike want that anyway? When a full-grown woman was standing right here. She eyed her curves appreciatively in the bathroom mirror. Tight abs, nice tits, great ass - how could he just walk away from this? She leaned heavily on the chipped Formica counter.

It HAD to be her. Buffy did something to him. Turned his head, manipulated him. Put on her Little Miss Perfect act and made him think he wanted that.

*Pretended to love him.*

That thought sent a bolt of red rage right through her. Buffy took him, she stole his love away. And why? For a few laughs? For a fuck? Or was it just to hurt her, to show her that she could and would take anything that Faith ever wanted? Wasn’t it enough that Buffy already had everything; a wonderful mother that loved her, a real home of her own, a devoted fiancé and friends? All Faith had was Dawn and Spike really. They were her only family, the only things in this world she really loved.
Then Buffy took Spike, and now she wanted Dawn too…

“Fuck that.” She growled at her reflection.

That bitch had to GO.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Giles handed Buffy a plain white envelope with his name scrawled across it in jagged ballpoint pen.

“She left you this? What is it, a ransom note?” She asked bitterly.

“Not precisely, no. She explains why she took Dawn.” He sat down wearily on the edge of the table. “And what she’ll do if we attempt to get her back.”

“That’s how we knew it was Faith.” Xander said quietly.

Willow stepped forward.

“What does it mean, Buffy? Do you know? A lot of it didn’t make any sense to us.”

Xander & Willow looked at her expectantly, as if she would have all the answers – just like they always did. She shouldered the burden with a small sigh, and sat down to read.

Inside the envelope was a sheet of cheap, lined notebook paper folded into a crumpled square. In Faith’s erratic hand she read betrayal, fear and hate – it dripped off the page like venom and it was all directed towards her.



Giles,

I know your gonna worry and I’m sorry about that. But I don’t know who to trust anymore - even you. NO ONE is taking Dawnie away. She’s all I got. And if you try, I swear I’ll make you sorry. Just leave us alone now.

I wish Buffy stayed away – in her own world where she belongs. She ruined everything! Why does she have to take whats mine? Ain’t it enough she’s got Riley and her Mom? Tell that bitch if I ever see her again we are gonna throw down. She may have everybody else fooled into thinking she’s a perfect little princess, but I fucking know. She’s a slut and a liar who uses everybody to get what she wants.

Tell Spike that I know its not his fault. I know it was her. Tell him I loved him. I really did. But he better stay away from me too. She’s got her claws in him now and I cant stand to look at him anymore.

You guys were my family until Buffy came back. Now she’s got your heads all turned around and Dawn is all the family I got left. I swear I’ll hurt any one who comes near us.

I’m sorry. But that’s the way it is.

Faith



Buffy looked up at Spike, her mouth a grim, angry line. She handed him the letter and watched his face turn a still paler shade. Somehow, Faith knew about their relationship and she was making them pay for it.

Guess it was time to come out of the closet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Riley stalked through the darkness, fury percolating in his guts until he felt like the very blood would boil inside his veins. The images filled his head, overwhelmed him until he seemed to be breathing them in with the air around him. Spike kissing Buffy, his flesh a vile blanket that covered her. His hands in her hair, the look of tenderness on her face when she said his name…

The things he’d seen turned so effortlessly then into what he could imagine. How they would fuck and scream together. How the monster would make her come. How she would do anything and everything Spike wanted, things she’d never even dream of doing with him…Tears of pain and rage burned his eyes until they overflowed and spilled down his face.

He wanted to uproot a tree and shove it through Spike’s chest. He wanted to rip the head from his body and watch him dust in his hands.

She was his girl. HIS. His future wife! And she had been taken over and held in thrall by a beast too loathsome to even speak her name. He stopped in his tracks, seizing upon this new idea. It was a lifeboat in a hurricane.

*Thrall.*

It HAD to be thrall.

What else could explain this insanity? Why else would she leave him and go running into the arms of a demon? It was the only thing that made any sense.

*Thrall.*

“Spike.” He spat the name out like poison.

There was a problem he should’ve taken care of a long time ago. If only he’d known the damage to be done, he would’ve taken extreme pleasure in staking him a year ago. But it wasn’t too late. There was time yet. Riley Finn was a planner, a patient man. He would solve the Spike problem, and enjoy doing it. And once he was gone, the thrall would be over and Riley could get to the task of deprogramming Buffy. He could fix this, he knew he could. He could make it right again. And then they could go back to the way things were.

They were going to be happy.


** Oh Damn. That sounds sinister. So lay it on me - I know you're all in a tizzy because I made you feel bad for Riley AND Faith in a single chapter. Also I got that song stuck in your head for the rest of the week. I eagerly await your hate mail ;p *Smooch* Rosie **
Chapter Thirty Nine ~ Right by Your Side by Soul of the Rose
**Did you miss me? I missed you... My sincerest apologies for the delay between chapters. I got life-explodey. Serious life-explodey - like my entire Universe changed. But I'm back & ready for action, Chapter 40 is almost complete even. I'll try not to leave you all dangling for so long next time ;) **

Without further ado, I give you;


Chapter Thirty Nine ~ Right by Your Side

“Give me two strong arms
To protect myself.
Give me so much love
That I forget myself.
I need to swing from limb to limb
To relieve this mess I’m in.
’Cause when depression starts to win
I need to be right by your side.

No one seems to touch me
In the way you do.
Nothing seems to hurt me
When I’m close to you.
I’m so full of desire -
When you set my head on fire
I need to be right by your side.”

~The Eurythmics


Eros stood in the doorway of a cheap motel bathroom at the end of Route 9. He felt pity for the girl. She looked haggard and worn down in a way no 21-year-old should. But there was no help for it. The man she wanted simply didn’t belong to her and never had. He sighed, wishing for a way to ease her pain. Mother would call him foolish for involving himself emotionally in the affairs of mortals. But compassion was his nature; he was a god of Love after all. He could never understand how she could be so pitiless. When he asked her about it she would laugh and say that was Love’s true character. Love was a selfish and devouring thing and the sooner he came to terms with that the better. Eros kept his opinions to himself - there was no arguing with her once her mind was set. But secretly he felt she couldn’t have been more wrong. Love, in its truest form, was the most selfless thing in the world. Perhaps if she spent more time in the world she’d see that. Time and again he’d seen lovers risk their lives, fight for and even die for one another. It was beautiful to behold, and never failed to move him deeply.

He contemplated the sad creature in front of him. Poor child. Was there another perhaps? Someone to soften the blow, someone who might actually return her love? He tapped into her heart fire and caught his breath at the passionate flame he found. She was indeed a Slayer. No other being carried such a ferocious heart fire. Only extraordinary young women became Chosen, and when the demon aspect was activated it was certainly something to behold. He pondered her match for a moment. An immortal would certainly be required, someone strong enough to withstand her heat. He closed his eyes, focusing.

*Ah yes… There.*

He reached out into the Ether and located a twin fire, dark as her own and burning with just as much intensity. He smiled happily, quite pleased with himself.

Now all he had to do was draw her new suitor to Sunnydale.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy and Spike shared a meaningful look; the kind in which entire conversations were held and decisions made without a single word. It amazed her that their communication had reached this level so quickly. But then again, they had always understood each other perfectly. Even that first night at the Bronze, before Spike made his big “I’m killing you Saturday blah,blah,blah” speech, she’d felt that same simpatico between them. He favored her with a small smile, seeming to catch her train of thought. Buffy smiled back and turned from her reminiscence of a younger, more sinister Spike.

*So very hot…*

She sighed. There was a task at hand. It was time to tell Giles and the gang about their little secret. The cat was halfway outta the bag already and you know what they say about putting cats back in bags…

*Wait, what do they say about that?*

Something about it being hard or impossible or whatever. Anyway, it had to be done right? But she was sorry to do it. Sorry to lose that feeling of privacy, that this belonged only to them. They had been alone in their own little world. Now they would have to let the others in and she was dreading it. Dreading the yelling and accusations of recklessness that were bound to follow. Then there would be the inevitable Angel comparisons and questioning of her judgment. Again.

You know, you’d think after 5 years of saving them from Apocalypses, evil schemes and monsters of every variety they might learn to trust her a little. But noooo, anytime she ever did anything they didn’t like or agree with they all ganged up on her and tried to talk her out of it. Even though she usually turned out to be right…

*Hello – Slayer here, Duh! Intuition kinda comes with the package.*

Her brow furrowed in determination. Well, not this time. She was not going to be bullied or talked out of anything. She loved Spike, they were together now and everyone was just gonna have to deal. She loved them, she really did. But there were moments that she wanted to line them up and slap them all in a row just like Moe from the Three Stooges. The way today was going it just might happen…

Spike, ever the gentleman, chose this perfect moment to smile at her affectionately and extend his hand. At least this would make him happy, all he’d ever wanted was to be able to love her openly. Now he could… She just wondered if he realized the colossal ass-chewing they were in for. Buffy squared her shoulders and took his hand firmly in her own as she stood to face her friends and Watcher.

*Now or never…*

“Guys, we have something to tell you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They rose as one, Spike following her lead and standing strong at her side as they faced judge and jury. Xander’s gaze traveled from one determined face to another and then slowly down to their linked hands. It stalled there for a brief, uncomprehending moment before his eyes dinnerplated comically.

“Wha-huh?” was all he managed to splutter out before Giles interrupted. The Watcher had quickly grasped the situation at hand. His mind flipped through a back catalog of years full of heated looks, incessant bickering and a crackling chemistry that could only lead to one thing:

“Am I to understand you two are involved now?”

An uncomfortably disapproving note was placed on “involved”. It gave Buffy a deep seated feeling of guilty unease… as if she’d disappointed her father. In a way she supposed she had. But she lifted her chin defiantly and looked him in the eye none the less.

“Yes.”

Her voice was clear and unashamed and she felt Spike straighten up proudly beside her. His pride gave her strength and she squeezed his hand. They were in this together now, whatever happened.

“Buffy.” Willow gasped in shock.

The Slayer shot her friend a brief look of apology before settling again on Giles. She would not feel bad about this. She wouldn’t. Spike was the only thing she had ever wanted, the only thing she had ever asked for since she became the Slayer. If it was selfish so be it - damn her for a selfish man stealing bitch then. But she still wasn’t giving him up. Everything in her told her he was her right. Just as she was his.

*Mine.*

She thought, turning to look at him - willing him to feel it, to know it. Everything had happened so quickly, so many things were yet unsaid…but he had to know it. Know the depth of feeling that welled within her at just his name. His eyes met hers in perfect understanding, her own possessiveness mirrored there. Unable to contain his delight Spike grinned broadly, and spoke to Giles, his eyes never leaving hers for a moment.

“I don’t think ‘involved’ really covers it, Mate.”

“So I gather.” The Watcher replied softly, uncomfortably aware of the intimacy between them.

“Wait a minute. What the HELL is going on here?” Xander demanded, rising from his seat at the table.

“ I think that’d be obvious even to a doorknob like you, Harris.” Spike retorted with an insolent smirk.

Buffy took pity on him, he appeared to be mere seconds away from stroking out. She gave him a gently sympathetic smile.

“We’re together, Xander.” She took a deep breath and turned to look at the object of her devotion. “We’re in love.”

Spike looked over the moon. His eyes glistened with happiness and he smiled at her beatifically. She’d said it, confirmed it to her friends, her Watcher – claimed him, finally, as her own. He could dust a happy vamp now. Well, one more thing he’d like to do first… his mind filled instantly with naked Buffy thoughts and he grinned wickedly.

Buffy knew that look all too well and was immediately aroused by it. She blushed deeply at having such naughty thoughts in front of her friends and shot him a small scowl of admonishment. Spike filed the look away as his second favorite, just behind her pouty face. She looked adorable with her ears tipped pink and her cheeks a bright scarlet.

“Since when?” Xander choked out. He couldn’t believe this was happening again. How could Buffy choose another vampire? What was the sickness in her that kept drawing her back to that?

*And what about Riley? And Faith? What the fuck is going on?*

Willow echoed his thoughts; “What about Riley? Your engagement…I just don’t understand.” And the unspoken hurt that lay beneath that: Why didn’t you tell me?

Buffy turned towards her friends, feeling their pain and confusion. She’d never wanted it to be like this. She wanted to take her time and explain everything, ease them into it… But Faith had taken that option away - ruining everything just like always. She sighed wearily.

“ I’m sorry you had to find out like this. I planned on telling you but…everything happened so fast.” She left Spike’s side with a reassuring squeeze to his hand and turned to Xander. “This really only started yesterday - but it’s been building for a long, long time. Years even.”

“Since the day we met, Love.” Spike reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear tenderly.

“Yes.” They shared a meaningful look before she turned back to her friends. “I just couldn’t deny it anymore. I think coming here made it all clear to me. Suddenly I lost the things that mattered most; Dawn wasn’t my sister anymore and I wasn’t the Slayer. And Spike…” She trailed off remembering how deeply his loss had cut her.

“But what about Riley?” Willow interrupted. “ Don’t you love him? What about your wedding?”

“There was no wedding in my world. We were just dating. And we’ve been having problems for awhile now.” She sat down next to Willow at the research table. “Being here, being engaged – I just got how wrong we were for each other. It never would have worked, Will. Sorry, but it wouldn’t.”

Giles spoke up impatiently; “But you’re forgetting the very important fact that this ISN'T your life, Buffy. In all practicality you are a guest here – a visitor. What right have you to make such drastic changes to another’s existence? Not to mention the effect this could have on the fabric of reality itself! I can’t believe you would be so careless as to rush into to this without any thought for the consequences of your actions.” He paced the floor scowling.“And what of Faith? You’ve changed her life as well – and not for the better I might add. And look at the repercussions of that! Who knows what chaos this could lead to…” he paused frowning. “ I’m very disappointed in you, Buffy. This is the most reckless thing you’ve ever done.”

She felt his displeasure like a fist in the gut. Giles’ opinion mattered so much – more than almost anyone’s. She had expected resistance, some judgment even – but not this. The weight of his disappointment was more that she could bear. Buffy studied her lap, struggling to contain the sudden threat of tears.

“What about me then?” Spike broke the silence. “Don’t I get a say in all this? It’s my life as well, yeah? Or unlife anyway… It might interest you lot to know that I was never in love with Faith - we had a casual thing as far as I knew. We never even talked about love and it was comin’ to its end anyway. I was set to break up with her before I ever saw the Slayer.”

Buffy’s heart warmed to hear him call her by her old nickname again. God, she missed that. Spike stood behind her chair, hands resting on her shoulders.

“And I’ve been in love with Buffy for years. Just never thought I could have ‘er is all.”

She smiled up at him gratefully. Always her white knight.

“But believe me, if I woulda thought for one moment I had a shot with ‘er nothing coulda stood in my way. Not Faith. Not Soldier Boy and certainly not you sods.”

“Yes, well we expect such rash behavior from you Spike.” Giles replied brusquely, with the air of dismissal. “ But Buffy should have more discipline.” He crossed his arms indicating the last word had been had.

Spike laughed derisively.

“And what’s discipline got to do with love, Watcher? Or has it been so long for you that you’ve forgotten?” He turned a cold eye on Willow and Xander.

“And you two. You’d deny her the chance to have what you both take for granted?” He looked at Willow directly. “You think she deserves less than what you have with Tara, Red?” He asked quietly. Turning to Xander he continued; “Or what you have with Anya?” Xander had the decency to blush and looked away.

“Yeah. S’what I thought – you never considered her at all. You just want her to wait for some rescue that might never come, put her whole life on hold in the meantime. Didn’t hear any mention of a way home for her tonight….” He eyed them each in turn, and was gratified when no one met his gaze. “ But still you expect her to stay tied to some bloke she doesn’t love because it makes you happy. You like her fine as long as she keeps her mouth shut and does what’s she’s told.” He growled. “ She’s not a bloody machine! She deserves a real life and a bit of happiness… And you call yourselves her friends.”

He turned his back on them, disgusted.

“C’mon, Slayer. I’m takin’ you home. We’ll find Dawn ourselves.” Buffy took his hand and followed him silently. He held the door open for her and was about to follow her out when Giles spoke up;

“She’s a Slayer, Spike. Slayers don’t get a ‘real life’ I’m afraid. They get a calling.”

Spike looked back over his shoulder.

“Buffy’s different. I thought you woulda figured that out by now.”

And he slammed the door behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Cordelia felt the vision coming on like freight train in the distance – from far away it sounded like soft Summer thunder but you knew it was gonna be goddamn loud when it got into town. She scrambled from her spot in the office to the lobby sofa trying to settle before it hit her full force and left her on the ground. Lightning struck her hard and fast throwing her backwards onto the cushions. Her eyes squeezed tight as the pain blazed through her brain. She had just enough time to think “Good thing this is a fainting couch.” before the vision revealed itself.

The images flashed in quick succession; disjointed pictures splattered with gore. Faith in a pool of blood on cracked cement, battle axe useless in her dying hand. A bruised and battered Buffy losing the fight against a beast beyond imagining – as if Hell itself had suddenly taken form. Cordy watched the sky split then as the very fabric of reality was rent into a thousand jagged pieces. Oh the death, the screaming of a million souls filled her head until her ears rang with their cries. Her eyes rolled back in her head and she passed out gratefully.

She came to moments later feeling like a gigantic migraine demon had invaded her skull and hatched an entire passel of young there.

“Thank God.” Angel sighed with relief. She focused a bleary eye on his hulking form.

“Must you loom?” she managed and then closed her eyes again.

“There’s my snarky girl.” Lorne chirped pleasantly.

Wesley moved to her side and stood over her limp form, his eyes gentle with concern.

“Are you quite alright, Cordelia?”

“Gettin’ there.” She replied. “But a handful of Excedrin and a very large cocktail would go a long way towards a full recovery.”

“On it, Sugar Plum.” And Lorne scampered off to make himself useful at the small office bar.

“Y’all quit fussin’ over her.” Fred laid a cool washcloth over her forehead and shooed the ineffectually loitering men away. Cordelia smiled up at her with deep appreciation and Fred squeezed her hand.

“Yes, well…” Wes covered for his previous uselessness, “Why don’t you tell us what happened?” he settled himself beside her and went into full Watcher mode, pen and paper at the ready.

Cordelia flashed on the gruesome images of her vision and sat up abruptly, clutching at his sleeve.

“It’s the Slayer. She needs us.” She looked over at Angel, her face grim.

“Now.”








** Whatever will happen next? Will Faith meet her true love? Will Buffy & Spike find Dawn? Will they ever find time for naughtiness again?!! (Undoubtedly...) Find out on the next episode of "Slayers of our Lives"
Stay tuned, True Believers... More next week-ish. *Enormous Loves* Rosie***
Chapter Forty ~ Love Comes to Town by Soul of the Rose
** Oooo, Looky another chapter within less than a month. Don't go gettin' all spoiled now ;p Enjoy!**


Chapter Forty ~ Lover Lay Down


“Spring sweet rhythm dance in my head,
Slip into my lover's hands.
Kiss me oh won't you kiss me now?
And sleep I would inside your mouth.

Don't be us too shy
Knowing it's no big surprise -
That I will wait for you.
I will wait for no one but you.

Look please lover lay down.
Spend this time with me.
Together share this smile
Lover lay down…”

~ The Dave Mathews Band


Buffy was a mass of conflicting emotions - sorrow about Giles, rage towards Faith, sadness about her friend’s reactions and last but not least; heartfelt gratitude for Spike. He’d championed her like no one else in her life EVER. Stood up to her friends and Watcher and told them off for their unkindness in a way that left her stunned and for once in her life, silent. She was overwhelmed by his love and couldn’t think for the life of her how she’d managed to do with out it this long. He really was a miracle.

For his part Spike talked them all the way home, grumbling about “sorry fuckers” and “useless twunts”. Assuring her of her rights to happiness and all the love that he could give her and more.

“Life’s bloody short, Buffy - and a Slayer’s life is shorter than most. You have to grab your happiness with both hands while you can, Love. Believe me.”

Now where had she heard that before? That night in the graveyard with other Spike seemed like years ago, so much had happened. She shook her head at her own stupidity, to be given such a gift and turn it away… No wonder the Powers had sent her here. It took nothing short of a cataclysmic wake up call to get through her thick skull. Thank God she finally caught a clue. She turned from her thoughts to hear his growling character assassination of Xander;

“ And that bloody mong, Harris – as if he’s ever contributed more than a box ‘o Crispy Creams-”

“What’s a mong?” He stopped and looked at her blankly for a moment.

“ You know; a thicko - a moron.”

“Oh.” She grinned at him. “You know your accent gets thicker when you’re angry.”

“Does it?” he smiled back at her.

“Yup. It’s very manly.”

“Yeah? ‘Cause I’ve got a few choice words for the whelp yet – not to mention that git of a Watcher-”

She put a finger to his lips halting the rant in progress.

“Thank you.” She said softly, and kissed him. He stilled instantly to return her kiss.

“For what?” He whispered huskily, holding her close. She pulled back just enough to look at him.

“For being my hero.”

He chuckled.

“Never thought I’d hear that term applied to me.”

“No?”

“ Always thought of myself as more’ve the anti-hero type.” His eyes lit up. “ Like Clark Gable in “A Free Soul” I always loved that bastard Ace. I remember seeing him on the big screen and thinkin’ ‘Now there’s a man a fella can relate to.’”

“What’re you going on about?” She snuggled deeper into his embrace.

“Nothing, Love.” He kissed the top of her head. “ Just pondering my place in the world s’all.”

“Oh.” She smiled up at him. “Well, that’s simple.”

“Is it now?” He raised an eyebrow her way.

“Absolutely.” She replied, as if the answer were obvious. “Your place is with me.”

He grinned and took her hand in his, kissing it.

“That it is.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel was at Cordelia’s side in an instant, drawn by the undisguised fear he saw in her eyes.

“What happened?”

“I had a vision, worst one I’ve ever had – knocked me out at the end. I saw the Slayer, dead in a pool of her own blood.”

Wes sucked in a hiss of shock. Faith had been his Slayer, and he couldn’t help but feel her death was somehow still on his hands. He had abandoned his charge to another Watcher feeling himself quite inadequate to the task of managing the wayward girl.

“And, I saw Buffy -”

“Buffy? You saw Buffy?” Angel’s insides clenched with dread. “Was she dead?”

“No… but she was well on her way. She was fighting some nasty thing I can hardly describe – and it was winning.”

If Buffy was fighting it had to be deadly. Only something catastrophic would draw her from retirement…and her impending wedding. He firmly squelched the pang of jealousy he felt at that thought. She was happy now, she was loved by a normal man - that had to be enough. He turned himself with practiced discipline to the task at hand.

“ There’s more.” Cordelia continued grimly.

“Ya mean it gets worse, Buttercup?” Lorne handed her a perfectly blended Cosmo which she accepted with alacrity. Pausing for a fortifying sip she continued;

“ ’Fraid so. After that the sky tore itself into about a billion pieces and then everybody died. The end - as in of the world.”

“Guess we better suit up then.” Gunn said stepping further into the lobby from his spot by the front entrance.

“Looks like it’s Apocalypse time again.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike left her sitting quietly while he prepared for bed. She was surprised to see him shed his clothes and slip into black flannel sleep pants.

*Spike owns pajamas?*

He dug for a moment in his chest of drawers and came up with a plain t-shirt and boxers. Gently he helped her out of her shirt and slid the tee over her head. Then he handed her the boxers.

“Too much temptation there, Love.” He said with a sideways grin.

Buffy stood up and shimmied out of her jeans, sliding the comfortable cotton shorts on quickly. She smiled when she caught him watching her, the hunger clear in his eyes. He smiled back at her with a little shrug and slid underneath the sheets, holding them open for her to join him. She slipped into the cool comfort of his arms and felt herself relax for the first time all evening.

Yet another gift he was giving her; rest and comfort with no demands. He was showing her he could be there for her and put her needs first, even over his own constant desire. She turned toward him and tucked her head into the nook of his shoulder.

“I love you so much. Do you know that?”

He nodded and squeezed her tight, moved. Every time she said it was like a miracle to him.

“Love you too, Princess.” He replied softly, “More than I can say.”

He kissed her forehead with tenderness and let her settle herself into his arms. Buffy snuggled up to his side with a happy little hum and finally drifted off to sleep,
feeling loved.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


“Is that what we’re doing, Angel?” Fred asked. “Are we going to Sunnydale?”

They all looked at him expectantly. He felt an irrational desire to shrug off the weight of their stares. Angel still wasn’t entirely used to the leadership role he’d been cast into. Fighting alone was so very much simpler.

“WE aren’t going anywhere.” He replied tersely. “This is for me to handle.”

“Hold up there, G.” Gunn crossed his arms stubbornly. “ I KNOW you aren’t even thinkin’ about leavin’ me behind.”

Angel sighed, feeling deeply put upon.

“I don’t see the need to put all of you in danger; I have experience with the Hellmouth. I can handle this alo-”

Cordelia cut him off;

“Excuse me, but I have experience with the Hellmouth too. Hello! Sunnydale vet remember? I even have my button that says ‘I survived blowing up the Mayor. Ask me how.’”

“Well, maybe you do – but THEY don’t and I can’t have my seer jeopardized.” He knew it was lame, but it was worth a try.

“Bullshit.” She shot back. “We’re all going.”

“Am I still the boss here?” He threw up his hands.

“My vision, my rules. And I say we need the team for this.”

“It might be wise to take some of us, Angel.” Wesley tactfully interjected. “If Cordelia’s vision is any indication of what you might be facing there, it would be best to be prepared.”

“You need back up. I’m coming.” Gunn said with finality.

Angel sighed, giving in. His own doubts and worries about what Buffy might be facing making him cave. It would be a comfort to have them there. Gunn was a formidable fighter, as was Wes - he could make sure the rest of them were well out of the way come game time.

“Fine.” He said curtly, his tone letting them know his acquiescence was under extreme protest. “Gunn and Lorne start packing us an arsenal. Fred and Wes we need any relevant research materials.”

He was somewhat mollified when they all scrambled to obey his commands.

“What about me?” Cordelia piped up from her spot on the sofa. “Don’t I get a job?”

“Do what you do best.”

“Sit here and look pretty?” She batted her eyes and crossed her legs enticingly. Angel let out an exasperated sigh.

“ORGANIZE, Cordelia. You said it; this is your vision – think of anything we might need and make sure we have it.”

He paused briefly for utmost dramatic affect.

“We leave before sunrise.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Spike sensed her restlessness and it kept him from his slumber. He was so attuned to her that he awoke instantly when he felt her stirring, feeling her sadness and fears as deeply as if they were his own. Pulling her close he kissed her forehead gently, willing her back to sleep. Buffy turned to him instead, eyes seeking his face in the darkness. Reaching for him she pulled him down to her and kissed him hard - like she was starving for him, like she hadn’t been kissed in weeks.

He understood what it was she needed then; release, connection, solace - all in the shelter of his arms and body.

*Everything…*

He would give her everything she needed and more. And right now she needed him. While he keenly felt her sorrow he couldn’t help but rejoice in the fact that she did need him. That he was the one she turned to now, the one she reached for in the night.

She brought his hand up under the hem of her t-shirt and he found his fingers suddenly burning with the heat of her flesh, his palm filled with the weight of her perfect peach breast. When his thumb brushed over the pearl of her hardened nipple she encouraged him with a breathy moan that went straight to his cock, hard since the moment she reached for him.

Her hands seemed to be everywhere, tangling in his sleep-loosened curls, clutching hungrily at his chest, worming their way inside his pants. He hissed when he felt her hot little fingers closing around him. Not gentle, God no. Not tonight. She held him hard and began to work his length forcefully. Spike loved her in charge like this, dominating him, simply taking whatever she wanted.

But he couldn’t let her have all the fun, now could he?

Breaking her hold he whipped up her shirt and latched on to a rosy nipple. Buffy arched into his mouth with a sharp cry that made him grin into the dark. He captured the other nipple with one hand and let the other slip inside her boxers to where she was already wet. He allowed his fingers to glide over her slickly parted lips for a moment before he dipped his middle finger inside. Her hips rose up to meet his hand and she favored him with a husky groan. He gathered wetness from within and worked it up and then over her clit, circulating for a moment before repeating the process once more. Again and again he exerted his rhythm until she was whimpering and panting beneath him. When he felt her trembling on the very edge - he struck.

The boxers were off in two quick yanks and her shirt was up and over her head before she could even blink. Naked he laid her out, spread and succulent before him. He kissed her mouth, her neck, paused to suckle each nipple in turn before settling between her satiny thighs. His mouth watered at the heady scent of her arousal, made all the sweeter knowing it was all for him. He was her only desire.

Each golden thigh received its due; with torturous languor he kissed and licked his way from the inside of her knees to the crux of her thighs. Finally he lowered his mouth to the sweet honey of her quim. Spike let his demon out to savour the taste, his tongue elongating in the process. Tickling her deep inside, she shuddered and moaned against him. The smell of her thrummed in his veins, made his cock throb at the musk of it. It was so strong like this, in game face he could sense everything in infinite detail. Scent and taste had layers and nuances he couldn’t experience otherwise.

His demon fed on her cream as blissfully as he would her blood. To taste her was all it wanted, and Spike drank deep. Growling with the pleasure of it he lapped at her pussy like a great cat. Steady licks drove her slowly out of her mind and sent her spiraling out of control. Spreading her wide, he bared the small pink diamond of her clit and assaulted it with his rough, textured tongue.

The sensation was unbearably pleasurable for her. Her body tensed like a bow string and her hands knotted in his hair, she hovered for a moment on the brink. Doubling his attack he increased his pace until he felt her let go. Buffy threw back her head and wailed her satisfaction to the night.

When she called his name,
he came.

No time to think or control it, in demon form she was just too much for him. Too visceral, too delicious - overpowering in her charms. He spent into the sheets helplessly as she rode out her orgasm against his mouth. Groaning he rode it out with her, his body shuddering in release.

Spike licked his glistening mouth clean, savoring the taste of her before slipping back to his human face. He rose above her then, extending her pleasure with his clever fingers, sliding two inside before the last tremor had even passed. Her eyes were wild as she met his hooded blue gaze. Panting she dragged him down to meet her mouth, kissing him savagely. He felt her capture his length with her small hand and moaned at the sensation of heat on his cool, sensitized flesh.

His cock was still slick with his come and she used it to manipulate him, sliding the foreskin along the length and circling the head with her thumb on the upstroke. He fucked her hard with his fingers as she stroked him, matching each other in primal rhythm. The need built inside him so quickly it left him gasping.

*Never, never enough.*

Never enough of her, never. The moment he came he was left hungry and wanting, always wanting more of her. The words came tumbling from his lips, all the hunger, all the need;

“Never enough of you, Baby. Not ever. Your skin, your mouth, your sweet pussy - always want more. Always.”

“Yes.”

“Say it; say it’s the same for you.” He locked eyes with her.

“Oh God yes.” She panted. “Never enough, Spike. I can never get enough of you.”

She worked him hard until his orgasm overtook him, semen jetting over her belly as she rode his hand. Watching his face as he came sent her off again like a bottle rocket, multiples bursting in shimmers in the air.

He lit her on fire, never had she been this way before. Buffy felt wild and fierce and free – like something deep inside her was suddenly out of its cage and flying. He kissed her hard then, and let his knowing fingers pleasure her until she screamed, his voice a dirty, sweet whisper in her ear;

“ That’s it, Love, come for me again. Yeah, just like that, Baby…COME.”

And she did, her body rushing to obey his command - back arching, heels digging into the backs of his thighs as she quaked around his hand. It was so good with her, just like this. Giving her pleasure was more than he ever thought he’d be permitted. And what she gave him in return satisfied him both body and soul. With her he almost felt he had one again.

He’d damn well get a soul if she required it. Anything she wanted – the moon, the world, a brand new bloody soul - it was all hers for the asking. He kissed her languorously as she came down and chuckled when she pulled him on top of her, lithe body wrapping itself around him.

“Careful, Pet. You’ll make me hard again if you keep that up.”

“And this is a bad thing why?” She replied lazily, undulating sensuously against him.

“ Nothing else’ll get done today...’cept maybe you.” He tapped the tip of her nose for emphasis.

“Why is the Universe always conspiring to make me leave your bed?” she pouted.

“Dunno. Ought to have a talk with whoever’s in charge tho’…” He settled himself on top of her, bestowing slow, wet, open mouth kisses.

“Mmmhmm…” Buffy purred in agreement. “ ‘Cause that’s just not right.”

“ Bloody shame s’what it is.” He agreed with a sigh.

Reluctantly he rolled off her. Spike could feel daylight coming on, the sun just pushing up on the horizon.

*Got to go soon...*

Morning was coming.

Time to find Dawn.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Without his old Initiative contacts Riley could only do so much. The books had given him nothing; stakes and crosses, holy water and fire. Not enough – and much too good for Spike. In desperation he’d turned to darker sources. He knew the cost would be steep, but it was worth it. Spike had to pay - he had to be eliminated. This was the surest, most agonizing way.

He paused at the cave’s entrance gathering courage. He could feel the Hellmouth somehow and repressed a small shudder. The air inside was oppressively thick with heat and damp and smell did nothing to alleviate his apprehension - something feral lived here, something infinitely old. Unfortunately he knew exactly what - he’d seen the ghastly drawings helpfully provided by the Crowley Index.

Riley sought a demon mage, older than dirt and considerably less sane. Born before the time of the old Roman Republic, it had gone slightly mad in its dotage and now lived in seclusion in the catacombs near the Hellmouth. The rumors in the underground painted an even more sinister picture, the price for its services were high and the rewards given beyond darkest imagining. He knew he had to come then, this devil could give him all that he desired.

He had gone to a great deal of trouble to locate the creature, his honeymoon savings were tapped out now. But that was fine - whatever it took to set things right. For what was a honeymoon without the bride? He pictured her in a fine white dress, smiling that perfect smile. She was waiting for him…Just one little detail to take care of first. He had a sudden, vivid flashback of her writhing underneath Spike and suppressed the impulse to snarl in rage.

An ancient and sinister voice spoke up from the shadows;

“Do you have my payment, Boy?”

“Yes.” His voice betrayed none of his fear. His Initiative training served him well.

“Let us see it then.” The oily voice purred. “You know the forfeit…”

He only hesitated a moment, anticipating pain. Riley raised the hem of his shirt and deftly maneuvered his hunting knife to carve a 6 inch wide chunk from his side. He hissed at the burning sting as it sliced through him like butter and finally came away, leaving a bloody hunk of meat in his palm.

“Give it to us!” From the shadows a scaly figure rushed forth, taloned hands grasping greedily. Riley flung his offering to the beast before it could touch him. The thought of clammy, reptilian fingers on his bare skin filled him with revulsion.

“A pound of flesh! A pound of flesh!” It sang, chortling merrily at its own joke. Rocking with delight the thing cradled his severed tissue lovingly before a long, pointed tongue came out to taste it. Riley looked away in disgust. He hoped to God he was out of here before he passed out…

“You have your payment.” He gritted through clenched teeth, the blood running freely from his dully throbbing side.

“Now give me what I came here for.”



**Did I make it worth the wait or what? Smut & sinister Rileyness all in one chapter. Aren't you just dying to know what he's up to? Don't worry I won't leave you dangling too long. Promise. More plot twistiness to come so stay tuned...same bat time, same bat channel *Smooch* Rosie**
Chapter Forty One ~ Monster Side by Soul of the Rose
*** No WAY! Can it be? Is it really?? Yes, My Babies, it is indeed; new fic from Rosie - woohoo! I got some smut & some sinister plot twistiness hot off the presses for ya - enjoy!***


Chapter Forty One ~ Monster Side


“I am young but a fool.
I am stupid but I'm cool.
I am kind but I'm weak.
I can turn the other cheek.
All I wanted was to find a friend…

I just can't hide my monster side.
I can't control the loss I feel,
The loss I feel.

If I had another chance
I would peacefully advance.
But as I'm fated to be here,
resigned and ridden by my fear.
I should love my self, but my vanity
loves someone else.

I just can't hide my monster side.
I can't control the loss I feel,
The loss I feel.”

~ Addict


Riley did his best to staunch his gushing side with the packet of gauze he brought with him. It would only last so long, his pants were half-soaked with dripping scarlet and he could feel the dizziness setting in from the blood loss.

“Sure you want it, Boy?” The beast laughed at him from its retreat in the shadows. “It hurts when it comes.”

“I know.” Riley ground out, frustrated, ready to be done with it.

“Are you so devoted to your blood letting then?” The mocking voice inquired.

He set his jaw stubbornly and didn’t answer.

“Ah, yes. I can see that you are.” It uttered a rich chuckle, molasses over gravel. “Come to me then, Child -” The beast stepped from the shadows towards him “and have your reckoning.”

Riley approached it reluctantly, repulsed by the flaking scales and milky eyes that regarded him coolly. Once in reach the demon dipped a taloned thumb to the severed chunk of flesh and brought it to the boy’s forehead, cheeks and chin.

He had been anointed with his own blood.

It left him feeling strangely shamed. The monster circled him counter-clockwise and began chanting then, heavy robes stirring up dust from the cave floor;

“Ustione!
Ustione con il fuoco di anima!
mangiatori dell'anima!
brucilo con il vostro blessing scuro.
riempialo di vostra magia vile!
In nome dei di scuri prego.”

Its clawed hand touched his chest as it gave a final, guttural cry;

“Sia illuminato!”

Riley was lifted from the ground, pulled by invisible forces that threatened to snuff him out like a candle. The pain was immense, more than he could’ve anticipated. Fire filled him, blinded him, seared his brain until he was devoured. He could not even scream for the agony overflowing his senses. He clung to one thought, one idea – it was the only thing keeping him conscious.

Spike’s death at his hands.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well that’s a nice change.” Buffy appeared in a towel, combing her freshly washed hair. Spike looked up from the book he’d been reading.

“What’s that, Love?”

He set down his copy of Cervantes carefully, all the better to enjoy the view.

“I actually get a shower and change of clothes today.”

He chuckled, and rose from the bed to wrap his arms around her waist.

“Coulda been nicer.” He nuzzled her ear.

“Yeah?” She turned toward him, lacing her fingers behind his neck.

“You coulda let me help you with all those hard to reach bits.” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“I would have but it would mean another hour in there…” She trailed off as he began kissing her shoulder.

“Mmmmm…maybe two.” He nibbled a delicate earlobe.

“Don’t you start with me again, Mister.” She wagged a finger at him, scolding. “You know we have to go soon and…oh!”

He smiled with sinister intent and pushed her back onto the bed.

*Too late.*

“Sorry, Love. Can’t resist the lure of a freshly scrubbed Slayer. You’re all sweet an’ pure an’ soapy clean.” He leaned in pressing tongue to front teeth in that look that made her cream. “Makes my demon wanna get you all dirty again.”

God that was hot. The things he said drove her crazy. She was wet already from the promise of that filthy mouth.

“You wanna make me dirty?” She leaned back sensually, displaying her long, tan legs.

“Yeah.”

“Come here and do it then.”

He pounced.

Spike couldn’t resist one more go with her. The feeling of time slipping away from him was almost palpable and he wanted to make the most of what he had. He knew there were troubles ahead, a sweet morning would bless the day for both of them. And what was another half hour in the grand scheme of things? Not time for a proper shag but long enough for a little more fun…

He whipped open her towel with a satisfied grunt. Her golden skin was still damp from the shower and he bent to lick a stray droplet of water from her neck, tracing it down over her collar bone and between her breasts. He seized upon a dusky pink nipple, popping it into his mouth. He sucked and licked at it greedily before attending to its mate and then moved to kiss her, pulling her roughly towards him. Her body smashed against his, moisture from her skin seeping into his clothes, the black turning blacker as it got wet. The front of his shirt gained a damp, Buffy-shaped imprint.

He pressed her back into the bed with a predatory growl and she wrapped her legs around him. They kissed hungrily and Spike couldn’t resist the urge to grind himself into the warmth of her inviting center. She whimpered at the contact, rough denim creating a delicious sensation of friction. Her hands tugged at the hem of his t-shirt pushing it up and over his head as she nipped at his chest. He helped her along pulling his arms out of the sleeves and tossing his shirt aside, gasping when he felt her close in on his own nipple. She took her time with each one, enjoying his reaction.

“Love your hot little mouth on me.” He rasped.

She took her teeth to him then, knowing it would make him wild. She nipped playfully at both nipples, his stomach, his hip bones and then rose up again to taste his neck.

“Tease.” He taunted.

“Hardly.” And she scraped her teeth over his sensitive neck, dipping in to lick his collar bone and bite his shoulder.

“Watch that, Love…” He warned with a growl. “You’re gonna get yourself in over your pretty little head.”

“Am I?” She asked innocently. “How’s that?” She nipped at him again, harder this time.

He stifled a snarl.

“ You’ll be bringing out my demon in a moment, then what will you do?” It was only half a challenge, part of him really wanted to know. Would she be shocked? Aroused? Would she reject that side of him?

She put herself face to face with him as they kneeled on the mattress.

“Bring him on.” And she deliberately bit his neck, scraping her teeth along it and using her tongue to tease him. A second later she found herself flat on her back, a very aroused Spike on top of her in full game face.

“This what you wanted, Little Girl?”

She raised her hand and ran it up and over his prominent brow ridges and cheekbones, caressing his demon visage gently.

“Beautiful.” She said and pulled him down to her for a kiss.

They had never kissed like this before – it was different, wilder. She enjoyed the feel of his textured tongue sliding against hers. She ran the tip of her tongue carefully over each extended canine and felt him shudder.

“You like that, don’t you?”

“Like everything you do, Buffy, everything…”

“Show me more. I want to see all of you.”

He rose from the bed to toe off his boots and shuck his jeans. She gasped when his erection was revealed.

“This changes too?” She kneeled before him, marveling. It was an altogether new thing – hard as steel, longer and thicker than anything she’d ever seen. The head was full and crimson with blood and the veins stood out in prominent ridges all down the shaft. She touched it wonderingly and he gasped when her hot fingers encircled him. She caressed it lightly over the head and then down around the sides, the veins gave it a feeling of texture. She wondered what those hard ridges might feel like inside her, the thought gave her a hot flush of excitement down to her toes.

“Do you like it this way?” He held himself still, his face unreadable as he waited for her to deny him.

Her answer was to engulf him in her mouth. Greedily she sucked in all she could, lavishing him with licks and strokes until he was glistening.

“God, Love, what you do to me…” His voice was a rough whisper.

He’d never had her this way before, it was overwhelming. Every sensation was intensified. He could smell the soapy perfume of her clean skin and floral shampoo all mixed with the sweet tang of arousal. Her hands burned him but her mouth was hotter still, slick and sweltering as she worked him over. He thought idly of napalm. Spike fancied he might die now, burned up by her heat, turning to ash from the cock up.

He threaded his hands through her hair gently, mindful of his claws – the silky strands a spidery caress against his skin. She sucked him hard into her mouth then and his eyes rolled back into his head as he groaned. She was all too much for him - he felt the urgency of his orgasm barreling down.

“Gonna come, Buffy.” He panted. “Gonna come if you don’t stop.”

“Want you to.” She whispered huskily between licks. “Wanna taste you like this.”

*Oh Fuck.*

She really was trying to kill him.

He tried to calm down, hold back a little longer. He wanted to enjoy this moment. But when she spoke again it was his undoing.

“Promise me, Spike…”

“Anything.” How could he deny her now?

“Promise me you’ll fuck me like this. I want to feel your demon inside me.”

He roared as he came, unable to control it. He had hoped for her acceptance – but her desire? That she might want him in his darkest form was beyond him. He spilled himself into her mouth with an agonized cry. Buffy swallowed every drop and then leisurely licked him clean.

His legs were trembling now, he couldn’t stand anymore. Spike sat down heavily beside her and regarded her with new eyes. She never stopped surprising him.

“What? Was it not good?” She couldn’t read him in vamp face.

“God, Love – It was…incredible. Never felt anything like it.”

“Really? Why were you looking at me funny then?”

“ I just can’t believe that you…that you would want me. Like that.”

“Why wouldn’t I? It’s part of you and I love you.” She put her hand over his heart and touched his face. “All of you.”

He thought he might burst into tears.

*Ponce.*

But he swallowed hard instead.

“I guess you have experience with that sort of thing…”

“Not really. Angel never let me see that part of him. He kept it away from me, like he was ashamed of it.” She turned toward him. “I don’t want you to be ashamed, Spike. I know what you are - you’re a good man at heart. And you’re a fighter, and the Big Bad too. And I love you for it.”

He couldn’t find words to reply to such a declaration. He simply wasn’t prepared. He studied his hands instead. Seeing his claws he realized he was still in game face and shook it off.

Buffy watched the play of emotions across his face silently, a question forming in her mind. She had to ask…

“Do you want to kill people still?”

He grinned wickedly.

“ Does Finn count? What about the whelp?”

She smacked him, grinning herself.

“Alright, alright – no need for violence. I’ll answer.” He sighed. “Honestly?”

“Yes please.”

He shrugged uncomfortably.

“Sometimes. When someone pisses me off or gets in m’ way. It feels more expedient to separate the head from their body than reason with them.”

“Ew.” Buffy grimaced at the visual.

“You did ask for honesty, Pet.”

“I did.”

She studied him seriously.

“Do you still want to eat them? The little Happy Meals with legs?”

“You’re the only treat I want to eat, Baby.” He smirked.

“Spiiike.” Her tone held a warning.

“ Fine.” He rolled his eyes, not having any fun. “I still crave the blood. Can’t help it. But bagging it doesn’t bother me any.” His grin turned wicked once more. “Though if you wanted to treat me to some fresh from the source I wouldn’t say no.”

Buffy’s eyes grew wide.

“You want to bite me?” She asked in a little girl voice.

“Don’t tell me you haven’t thought about it.” He sidled up close.

She was all too aware of his naked proximity to her own.

“Maybe.”

“Dreamed about it?” His voice a hot whisper in her ear.

She swallowed.

“Maybe…”

“Where? Here?” He tasted her neck and scraped it with his blunt human teeth. “Or here?” He ghosted along her inner thigh with his fingers eliciting a small hum of pleasure.

“Still haven’t attended to yet, have I, Pet? Can’t leave my girl wanting.”
His questing fingers slid to the apex of her thighs. He caressed her with the lightest of touches, first outside then in. Buffy caught her breath.

“Wet for me already - aren’t you, Sweet Kitty?” His voice rumbled into her ear.

“Been wet.” She rasped.

“Yeah?” He chuckled. “Since when?”

“Since you showed me your cock.”

And she pulled him down to kiss him ravenously.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He didn’t remember passing out or even waking up… Suddenly he simply was. Riley felt his existence as a wholly new thing. What was this creature he had become? He realized with a shock that he felt entirely well. He lifted his shirt to check the wound to find it gone - replaced by an ugly, jagged scar, but fully healed none the less. His whole body felt different. He was harder, stronger, filled with light. He flexed his wrists and spread his hands, marveling as little green crackles of energy sparked between his finger tips.

“How long will it last?” He watched with fascination as lightening danced over his palm.

“Long enough, hmmmm.” The Beast replied comfortably.

“ Months would hardly be long enough.” He spat, imagining the myriad tortures to be inflicted upon his enemy.

“ Not that long, Boy.” It chuckled. “ Not that it matters… you’ll be back swift ‘fore it has a chance to wear itself away.”

“No.” Riley shook his head. “This was a one time deal. I have a purpose - It’s not about the power.”

“So you say.” It regarded him thoughtfully, a small smile of amusement playing on scaly lips. “You’ve had your taste now, Child - only a matter of time till you’ll be wanting another.”

“You’re wrong, Demon.” He ground out. “I’ll never come to this place again.”

The old monster only cackled at him as it melted back into the shadows.

“ Mind me now, Boy – next time I’ll be wanting a finger.”

Riley stalked sullenly from the cave, its mocking laughter following him out into the starlight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They had already scouted out Restfield and Shady Glen – the thought being that Faith could easily take shelter in an abandoned crypt, playing keep away with Dawn through every cemetery in Sunnydale. The task would have seemed impossible if not for Spike’s finely tuned vampire senses. He could quickly pick out a scent and tell if Dawn or Faith had been there anytime within the last week. A quick shortcut through the UC Sunnydale campus and they could hit Holy Cross, Rose Hills and Sunnydale Memorial Gardens.

*Two down, and only a gajillion more to go…*

She sighed. The only thing that made this at all bearable was Spike. Even under the worst circumstances he could make her laugh, and she loved learning more about him. She had no idea he was such a good story teller, from dirty jokes to absurd yarns about his past he had her spellbound. Buffy found herself almost hoping the night would drag on further…

Cutting across the university grounds they held hands, fingers twined together like the sweethearts they were. Buffy sighed again but with contentment this time, resting her head on Spike’s shoulder. She had the best feeling right now, as if everything was going to work out alright. They would find Dawn and deal with Faith – and anything else that came up. As long as they were together all was well with the world. She smiled blissfully.

*Together.*

Amazing how that one word could make her so happy. Spike stopped abruptly and let out a low growl of warning, his body suddenly taut as a bow string. Her head shot up and she switched automatically into a fighting stance, alert for imminent danger. She spotted a hulking form coming up the cement path by the dorms, her body relaxed and she dropped her head with a small shake.

“Damn.”

The very last person in the world she wanted to see was walking across the grass right toward them. It was like he had a talent for it or something, she tried to avoid him but he seemed to magically appear wherever she was. As she got closer she noticed something was different about him; he looked ragged and unkempt - a far cry from the immaculate picture he usually presented. And there was something else, she couldn’t quite put her finger on it but he seemed… odd somehow.

“Riley?”

“Buffy.” His voice was placid. He closed the distance between them at a comfortable saunter.

She gaped at the red stain that spread from waist to thigh down his side.

“Oh my god – you’re bleeding!”

He rejoiced inwardly, her concern reinforcing his sense of rightness. Once this was done, she would be his again. He knew it.

*Knew you still loved me.*

“I’m okay. I’m better now - better than you could imagine.”

“Okay…” There was definitely something weird with him. “What happened?”

“Just a small altercation with a demon. Nothing I couldn’t handle.”

It wasn’t a lie, not really.

“Are you alright? You haven’t had to fight in awhile...”

“Just fine. Nothing my Initiative training couldn’t handle.” He smiled genially.

“I see…” she didn’t quite believe him, but was willing to let it lie. He wasn’t her problem anymore.

*Thank God.*

“Listen, Buffy – I was looking for you actually.”

“Really?” she asked warily “Why?” The last thing she wanted was another confrontation with him.

“I wanted to get the ring from you.” Riley winced internally; he knew she was going to need her engagement ring… after. But it was as good an excuse as any to part her from Spike. Once she was clear he could finally finish this. He put on his best aw-shucks Midwestern accent; “I wouldn’t ask…but you did offer, and if you don’t want it…”

Buffy relaxed immediately, all he wanted was the ring. No problem, she could get that for him and call it done. The last link between them severed for good.

“Of course you should have it.” She replied generously. “It’s just up in my room; I can get it right now if you want.”

“Fine.” He smiled pleasantly. “I’ll wait.’

Spike’s eyes never left Finn for a moment. Something was off here, he could smell it. He just didn’t know what yet.

“Think I’ll wait too, Pet. Finn an’ I can catch up on old times.”

Buffy shot him her best glare and mouthed “Behave Yourself” once she was out of Riley’s eye line.

“Alright. I’ll be RIGHT back.” And she hurried off towards Stevenson Hall.

Spike turned back toward the boy, shoving his hands into the pockets of his duster.

“So whatcha been up to, Soldier Boy?”

Riley snorted.

“Like you care.”

He shrugged casually.

“Only in as much as it affects Buffy.”

“So you admit it then.” He sneered. “I thought you’d lie a little longer.”

Spike smirked at him nastily.

“Come now, Finn. We are men of action – lies do not become us.”

“How long?” He ground out through clenched teeth.

“Depends.” Spike’s casual manner mocked him.

“Depends on what?”

“Your point of view.” He circled around the boy. “You could say just a matter of days or…”

“Or?” Riley demanded.

“Always.

Before you met her or kissed her or even knew her name. You could say…” he leaned in intimately “She was always mine.”

Riley launched himself at Spike with an angry roar, which he sneered at and easily ducked.

*Git.*

What he was not at all prepared for was Finn’s preternatural howl of rage accompanied by crackling neon lightning. When he turned to Riley again the boy was standing in a maelstrom of eerie emerald fire. His eyes were wholly black and fathomless, while veins of poisoned green stood out from his forehead and temples.

*Oh Fuck.*

Finn went and made himself a mage.








*** I know, I know - another cliff hanger. But no 6 months of dangling this time, I swear! I have 3 new chapters in process as we speak. Look for a new one in a few weeks. Stay tuned, True Believers ;) xoxox Rosie****
Chapter Forty Two ~ Hot Hot Hot by Soul of the Rose
*** Can you believe I got another chapter out to you this soon?? Must be some black magick I got goin' ;) Things are about to get toasty for our favorite duo, and this is only the begining...***

Chapter Forty Two ~ Hot Hot Hot


“The first time I saw lightening strike
I saw it underground.
Six deep feet below the street
The sky came crashing down.
For a second that place was lost in space
Then everything went black.
I left that basement burning
And I never went back.

The second time I saw it strike
I saw it at sea.
It lit up all the fish like rain
And rained then down on me.
For a second that boat was still afloat
Then everything went black.
I left it underwater
And I never went back.

Hey hey hey
But I like it when that lightening comes
Hey hey hey
Yes I like it alot
Hey hey hey
Yes, I'm jumping like a jumping jack
Dancing screaming itching squealing fevered
Feeling hot hot hot…”

~ The Cure


Buffy was a little bit anxious about leaving the two of them alone together. But she figured that Spike was chipped and Riley was calm so it was probably okay. He also didn’t know they were together.

*Not that it’s any of his business.)

If he knew, she would never dream of risking it. He’d made his feelings about vampires all too clear over the last few months. Any notion that she was with Spike and he’d probably go all Norman Bates on her - look how he handled it when she was just patrolling! Buffy frowned worrying her bottom lip with her teeth.

If Riley did start anything Spike was fast enough and smart enough to get himself outta there… right? It was only her need to see this done that propelled her to get the ring in the first place. She wanted closure - mostly for him. She wanted Riley to know that it was well and truly over. Then he could move on with his life, just like she had. Hell, maybe he’d find himself some nice little farm girl to go and make babies with. Buffy grimaced at the thought.

*Whatever works, as long as it’s not with ME.*

It seemed to take forever to make it to her room. Anxiety was creeping in about what they might be talking about, tying her stomach into knots. Dammit, she knew Spike could never keep his mouth shut… What was she thinking leaving him alone with Riley?? And come to think of it, wasn’t it kinda weird that Riley never even asked what they were doing together?

*Maybe he was just waiting to jump on Spike?!*

Panicky thoughts began filling her head; scenarios of helpless, chipped Spike at the mercy of an enraged Riley. She opened the door and made a dash for the night table, glad that Willow seemed to be at Tara’s once again. Now was definitely not the time for a confrontation, she had bigger fish to fry. She yanked open the nightstand drawer and stashed the ring in her front pocket. Good. Now she just had to get back, hopefully before Spike said the wrong thing and all hell broke loose…

*Better hurry up then…*

Buffy had barely left the building when she heard Spike scream.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Have you tried calling Buffy again?” Angel asked, his impatience leaking through in his tone. He was worried, each moment that passed without a word from her made him more uneasy.

“Still no answer on her cell or at the dorm.” Cordelia replied.

“You think she’s at home?” He asked with little hope.

“Maybe…” she checked her watch; 5:30 a.m. “But it’s too early to call.”

“She could be at her fiancé’s…what’s his name again?” Fred piped up from the back seat.

“Riley.” Angel ground out. He really didn’t want to think about that; the happy couple wrapped in each other’s arms sleeping peacefully. He shoved the thought away.

“What about Faith?” Wes suggested.

“The service is off at her apartment again.” Cordelia shut her phone with an irritable little click.

“Dammit.” Angel smacked the steering wheel with his palm in frustration. “We’ll to have to call Giles.” The last thing he wanted to do was involve the Watcher. The man clearly disliked him – not that he could blame him. But it was unnerving dealing with people who suspected your every motivation.

“Let’s try her dorm room first.” Cordelia suggested. “She’s probably still asleep. I know that’s where I’d be…” she trailed off with a yawn and settled down into her seat.

“Right. Good call.” Angel relaxed, comfortable with this new plan of action. “We can start there and call in reinforcements later if we have to.”

With a little luck he could avoid Giles and the Scoobies all together.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike howled in agony as supernatural fire filled his insides; he was lit up now, light spilled from his open mouth and eye sockets, seeped from his pores. Riley grinned in vengeful pleasure twisting his hand in the air, turning up the heat.

“NO!”

Buffy shouted in panic, feeling the death of her lover as an imminent thing. Without a thought she launched herself at him, feet flying. Before Riley knew what hit him he was on the ground, bleeding from a large gash on the side of his head. It was her boot heel that did it, tearing his scalp open. Buffy stood over him shaking with rage.

“Stop this NOW.” She looked over at Spike and was relieved to see him whole, panting on his hands and knees, recovering.

Riley stood up, laying fingers gingerly to his wound.

“No. He has to die…then you’ll be free.”

“Free of what?”

“His thrall, his tricks! I can make this right, Buffy. Just let me.”

And he turned his magicks on Spike again. The vampire yowled in fresh torment as the fire ripped through him once more.

“Stop it, Riley! You’re killing him!”

Riley smiled with grim satisfaction.

“Not yet.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel turned the car into the shelter of the underground parking garage. Morning was mere hours away, he wanted to be able to find cover quickly. He had them bring weapons and a few key magick books as well - given the severity of Cordelia’s vision it seemed wise to take precautions, even now.

They were just unloading their gear when an agonized cry pierced the quiet darkness.

“Did y’all hear that?” Fred asked, eyes wide.

They followed the sounds to the woods at the edge of campus. In a small clearing by the side trails, Riley was slowly murdering Spike.

On his back, the vampire writhed as lightning danced in his veins. Buffy shrieked and reached for her lover instinctively, only to be thrown back by electric shock when she made contact.

“Stop it, Riley! Stop it now!”

He never even looked her way, all his focus consumed by the torment of his enemy. Slowly he rose into the air, an electric green aura crackling all around him. Buffy leaped for him but was repelled by a simple wave of his hand. She rolled to the ground unharmed and quickly began hunting for a weapon.

*All I need is one big rock.*

She just wanted to knock him out, but if he lost a little brain matter oh well. Buffy was as close as she had ever been to wanting to kill another human being.

From the sidelines Angel’s team watched the spectacle.

“Is that the thing you saw in your vision?” Angel asked.

“No, that’s just some mage-guy.” Cordelia replied with a yawn. “He just looks witchy - not demony.”

Wes began flipping through a hefty leather tome, looking for answers.

“I think we should help now, don’t you?” Fred watched, aghast as Riley sent Spike another bolt of flaming green lightning.

“I dunno.” Angel shrugged noncommittally. “He’s just killing Spike…”

“Angel!” Fred gasped.

“Alright, fine.” He sighed. “If you really want to.”

Wesley scanned the pages of his magick book quickly.

“Fred, check Starhawk’s Grimoire – I think we can strip him of his power…at least temporarily. Look for the ‘Five Point Binding’.”

Fred pulled the equally thick book from the stack and began hunting down the spell in question. Meanwhile Gunn popped open the weapons bag preparing to jump into the fray. He selected a wicked looking double-sided battle axe and began testing it for balance and heft.

A particularly brilliant flash of lightning illuminated their spot by the trees and cued Buffy in on their presence. No thought spared for why they were here, she was simply relieved to have backup. In practical Slayer mode she went directly to Gunn – the man holding the weapon.

“I don’t know you, but you’re with Angel so I assume you’re here to help.”

It was a statement, not a question.

“Name’s Gunn – and yeah, you could say I’m part of the cavalry.”

“Got any more of those?” She pointed to the axe in his hand.

Gunn grinned and kneeled down to unfasten the snaps on the weapons bag, it fell open to reveal a shining array of maces, cudgels, axes and swords. Buffy thought she could probably find some Chinese throwing stars in there somewhere too.

“Whatcha need, Slayer?” He smiled, more than a little proud, gesturing to his display.

“Sword – a big one.”

“I like a girl who knows what she wants.” He dug in the large leather satchel until he found the Claymore he’d been looking for.

“This do?” He handed Buffy the deadly-looking blade. She grinned malevolently.

“Nicely. Thanks.”

She looked back upon the torturous scene. The smell of barbequing flesh and singed hair was sickening. Spike was literally smoking, slow-cooking from the inside out like a roasting pig, writhing in agony with each fiery bolt. The sight made her burn with rage. Riley was going to pay for this with the beating of a life time.

“Can you back me up here? Do something to distract him maybe?”

Wes rose from his place at the magick bag, satchel of herbs in hand.

“I believe we can, Buffy. There’s a particular incantation I have in mind. It should strip him of his power – if only temporarily.”

Buffy’s eyes never left Riley.

“How long?”

Wes adjusted his glasses nervously.

“It’s not precise I’m afraid – it could be anywhere from five minutes to five hours.”

Her hands tightened around the sword hilt, knuckles white.

“Five minutes is all I need.”

Fred flapped her hands, bouncing like an excited chicken.

“I found it! I found it!”

They rushed over to her seat on the grass. Wes took the heavy book from her, trading it for the small leather bag in his hand.

“Oh well done, Fred! This is it indeed.” He patted her back awkwardly and she beamed at him. He turned to Buffy in full Watcher mode;

“We are at the ready, Slayer – on your word.”

Buffy’s brow furrowed with purpose as she advanced on her enemy. Fortunately, Riley was so preoccupied with exacting his revenge that he didn’t see her until she was almost upon him.

“Now, Wesley!”

Wes recited the incantation while Fred threw the herbs, getting as close to Riley as she dared.

Suddenly the mage found himself on the ground again, he tried to manifest his former power but it fizzled out, like a dying car battery. His fingers would spark, but no lightning came. He looked up again just in time to see Buffy coming at him with a Highland broadsword, pure fury in her eyes. She turned swooping it in an elegant arc over her head and stopped short just at his throat.

“Now that’s just pretty.” Gunn admired from the sidelines.

She pressed the blade closer to his aorta.

“Got your attention now?”

“Buffy don’t do this. I don’t want to fight with you.” He pleaded. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Oh, well - that’s really too bad ‘cause I damn well wanna hurt YOU.”

Riley hadn’t forgotten any of his Initiative training, he rolled quickly to the side and then tumbled under the blade. A back handspring had him up and in a fighting stance in under a minute.

“Fancy.” She acknowledged. “Won’t do you any good though.”

“Why not?” He asked, nonplussed.

“Cause I am SO kicking your ass.” And she jumped in full throttle, blade flashing, arms a blur of motion as she moved with fluid grace, almost dancing as she fought.

Riley had never seen her like this before; all the times they’d sparred together he thought she’d been giving him her all.

Apparently she’d been holding back.

A lot.

Years of military training had in no way prepared him to reckon with an extremely pissed off Slayer at full power. She swung a blade half her size as if it weighed nothing at all. He ducked and wove as fast as his body would allow, scanning the area around him frantically for anything remotely resembling a weapon.

Tired of this frantic game of cat and mouse Buffy planted the sword like a staff and used it as a fulcrum. At maximum strength she swung both feet into his chest and watched with great delight as he flew almost 20 feet to land with a hearty thud.

Before he could even stand again, she was on him. Grabbing him by his shirt collar she pulled him up just enough to get in a solid punch.

“This is for Spike.”

Thwap!

She backhanded him with her closed fist.

“And THIS is for me.”

Buffy planted her fist squarely in his face and knocked him out cold. She popped him once more for good measure – just to be sure he was really down. Dropping his limp body to the ground she stood, smiling with deep personal satisfaction. She dusted her hands off on her jeans and shouldered the broadsword, sauntering casually toward the group.

“Thanks for the back up, Guys. I couldn’t have -”

Behind her a rumbling started, like thunder, like an earthquake.

*Damn…*

She turned to see Riley, in all his ugly, black mojo glory hovering a full 3 feet off the ground. Bathed in sickly green light he glowed in the darkness like a deranged firefly.

“I told you I didn’t want to hurt you, Buffy.”

His smile chilled her to the bone.

“But I will.”



*** How do I manage to leave you at a cliffie every time? It's a gift really... Stay tuned, Kiddies - next week; the reckoning.
xoxox Rosie***
Chapter Forty Three ~ Super Overdrive by Soul of the Rose
*** For my darling Beta Miss Isabella on her birthday... Couldn't do it without ya, Cupcake! And for Lady of Spike who begged very sweetly for an update. :D ***


Chapter Forty Three ~ Super Overdrive

“Round and round and round we go
One time before I die.
Round and round and round the world
In super overdrive.
See the world through a little hole
See it fly by.
Here I am in super overdrive
Super overdrive, super overdrive.

I'm sliding on the swings.
I'm swinging on the slides.
I'm alive
Fuel-injected
Passion-erected
Death-defied

One day it’s gonna come, boy
You’re gonna pay…

~ Billy Idol



“Wesley!” Angel was at his side in a moment. “What happened?”

“I-I don’t know. Perhaps his loss of consciousness voided the spell?”

He flipped through the book hastily, searching for an answer.

“Find me another spell. Or recast this one.” He glanced at Buffy, beginning to actually fear for her for the first time. “Just DO something!”

Buffy faced off with Riley across the clearing, her eyes never leaving his for a moment. She was waiting for a sign, something to show his next move - but his face was unrecognizable to her, his eyes unreadable. The person that stood before her now bore no resemblance to the sweet and earnest young man she once loved. Now he was a stranger, capable of anything. In a way it was a relief, it lifted any burden of guilt she might have had.

There would be no holding back this time.

Without warning he struck; Riley hit her with the full brunt of his pain and rage, all channeled into a blast of magick so powerful it was blinding. It blew her back 30 feet. The Slayer skipped like a stone over the rough ground and finally lay still, her body at a broken, awkward angle.

Spike roared in protective fury, dragging his battered frame up from the grass to launch himself at the mage. Even in his weakened state he was too quick for the boy and tumbled them both to the ground, fangs locked into his neck like a pit bull with a bone. They were down for an endless moment, struggling in the dew-wet grass. Suddenly Spike flew in an arc as if struck by lightening, body landing with a heavy thud as Riley rose from the ground straight to his feet, propelled by his own magicks. With a wave of his hand his gaping neck wound was healed. He grinned menacingly and advanced on the just-stirring form of the Slayer.

Angel swooped in, black coat whipping dramatically behind him. He had decided he would be the one to finish the job Spike couldn’t.

*As usual.*

He thought with a put-upon little sigh. Sliding seamlessly into game face he jumped into the fray, preparing to defend Buffy at any cost. No thought spared for the now still form of his errant grandchilde. Before he got within 6 feet of Riley he found himself spun upside down and placed in a chokehold, floating well above the ground. The sorcerer spared him a grim smile.

“Don’t worry, Angel. I won’t leave you hanging for long.”

And he turned back to his intended leaving the vampire to dangle interminably, trench coat flapping comically around his ears.

Gunn rushed to Angel’s aide. He tugged and pulled from every angle, but nothing worked. The vampire was left to swing like the Hanged Man from the Tarot deck. He thought he might be able to get a hit in and force Riley to release his hold. Waiting until the sorcerer was half-way to Buffy, Gunn came in from behind with the battle axe. It bounced off harmlessly as if hitting an invisible shield. When he struck again the axe whipped out of his hands and embedded itself into the nearest tree. Riley never even looked his way.

He trudged back to Wesley, not prepared to give up just yet.

“You got anything, Man?”

“Not yet, I’m afraid. Fred?”

She shook her head, not willing to peel her eyes from the book in front of her. Cordelia moved from her spot on the hillside to sit next to Fred on the grass, selecting a battered leather tome from the stack. The two men exchanged a look of disbelief.

“If Cordy’s researching, it must be ON.” Gunn quipped.

“What? I’m a team player!” She replied indignantly.

“Yeah, but you hate it.” He snorted.

“I don’t see you cracking a book, Pal.” She gave him the eyebrow of doom.

“Well…That’s just ‘cause I’m lookin’ for more weapons…” properly admonished he turned back to their small arsenal and began diligently digging. Cordelia settled in to her research with just the eensiest bit of self-satisfaction.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy moaned and struggled to sit upright, her vision a hazy blur – everything had gone grey and misty around the edges like she was lost in a fog. She pulled herself up with the help of a convenient tree and shook her head, struggling for the breath her brutal landing had knocked from her. Blood trickled from a scalp wound into the corner of her eye, making it even harder to see. She couldn’t spot him – where was he? She scanned the landscape and found only misty dark. She couldn’t decide if it was her own blurred vision or his magick.

Riley came for her then. Floating two feet above the ground he approached, fingers dancing with sparks of evil green. He spotted her in the shadow of the tree and smiled a sick and deadly grin.

“There’s my girl.”

This was it, the moment that inevitably came for her in battle. So often faced with her own death she felt it.

The Choice.

Fall and rest or live to fight another day.

Buffy ALWAYS fought, even at her weakest, body bruised and bloodied. Because it wasn’t a choice at all – not really, it was simply who she was. She was a fighter, a warrior – a Slayer to her soul. And if she was to die, then she was damn well going down fighting. She closed her eyes trying to find that strength. Buffy thought of all she had to live for, to fight for.

Spike.

Dawn.

Mom.

Her friends, her Watcher, a world that held sunshine, shoe stores, Italy. Spike would take her to Rome and show her the city at night. And Paris too…what had he said? He wanted to make love to her at the top of the Eiffel Tower. She smiled at that, leave it to him to bring sex into everything they did. God, she loved him.

There was so much left to do, so much life left to enjoy…hadn’t she just discovered that? And no one was going to take it from her, not the Master, not Angelus, and certainly not Riley Finn.

She straightened up to look her approaching enemy in the eye, pure Slayer.

Riley faltered. Where was that battered young girl he saw struggling to her feet? Before him stood something entirely else; Buffy stood erect, spine straight, fists at the ready as she regarded him coolly. There was something animal about her, he could almost smell it.

She cocked her head at him quizzically, as if regarding a strange beast. What disturbed him most was her utter lack of fear. It was written in the lines of her body, a languid ease set about her. She was relaxed yet watchful, showing not the slightest sign of trepidation.

*I’ll show her fear.*

He set his jaw and pulled energy up from the earth, brow furrowed with the effort.

*I’ll show her LIGHTNING.*

Between his hands a fireball grew, emerald fury crackling with heat. He set it bouncing palm to palm like a basketball player ready for the game. Buffy regarded him serenely, the eerie green glow casting a sickly light on her face. She didn’t flinch. Not even when he drew back suddenly and threw it at her. She merely leapt with cat-like grace and let it pass harmlessly beneath her feet. She landed in a crouch, when she raised her head he took an involuntary step back.

She was grinning.

*Is that all you got, Boy?*

He could almost hear her saying it in his mind.

From her crouched position she pounced, faster than even his magick-enhanced vision could follow. Dragging him from his levitation, they tumbled to the ground landing with her on top, that malevolent grin still intact. Drawing back her fist she cracked him across the mouth, blood instantly began seeping from his split lip. In his anger Riley forgot his magicks and lashed back at her. With his closed fist he back handed her and watched with satisfaction as her head snapped to one side.

Remarkably, she laughed. A low sound of menace he had never heard from her before. When she turned her face back to him she was still smiling. Quick as a flash she sprang from him again, and with a leap and tumble laid hands upon her sword. When she stood once more, he felt the first rush of real fear.

Slowly she rose, head bowed until the last possible second, when the curtain of her hair cascaded from her face he saw her eyes. Black and fathomless they took him in and disregarded him in the same moment. He was no threat, no enemy – merely a broken beast to be dispatched quickly and just as soon forgotten. With arm extended she raised her blade and held it steadily at shoulder height, pointing directly at him. There was no mistaking the threat. Over four solid feet of razor sharp steel she stared him down. Only one word was uttered;

“Come.”

It was a command, a call. One he felt compelled to obey. Something about her tone…her voice.

*It doesn’t even sound like her!*

Riley felt a white bolt of cold fright shoot through him. For the first time since he began this mission he thought he might be the one to die. Somehow he finally found the sense to use the magicks he had paid so dearly for.

“I’m not going out like this, Buffy.”

He conjured another fireball and threw it at her. She used the sword as a deflector and sent it careening off into the dark.

“This isn’t how it was supposed to end!”

She stepped forward and he found himself retreating.

“You were supposed to be mine.”

He pulled up the lightning, drawing in energy from wherever he could.

“But if I can’t have you -”

The magick came over him again, his eyes pupiless and green as poisoned absinthe, emerald veins a broken spider web across his face.

“NO ONE CAN.”

And he struck her with everything he had.

A blinding fury of electricity came at her, for an instant Riley’s entire form was eclipsed by it and she saw only light. But the Slayer never faltered, with a dancer’s grace she leapt and the shot went wide, striking the old elm behind her and incinerating the top half instantly. The remaining stump flamed up and burned bright in the darkness.

By its golden glow he saw her. In the shimmers of heat her image danced; a pretty young college girl in the light of a fall bonfire. At a time not so very long ago they might have been holding hands beside it. He had a moment to wonder just how they had come to this. She smiled then, a terrible smile he would see forever in his worst nightmares.

And she came for him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Slayer within her was laughing with the joy of battle. Everything just felt right somehow. She was fulfilling the purpose she was born for. Feeling stronger than she ever had, Buffy cast her eyes to Riley. Even in his current evil form he seemed diminished somehow, smaller.

*Enough with the foreplay already…*

“Let’s finish this.”

And she bounded forward, sword in hand. His magick was of little use to him now. She fought as a woman possessed, faster and more furious than anything he had ever seen. Every attempt he made to hit her landed uselessly in the spot she had only just been. It required all his focus to try to fend her off. Angel finally dropped to the ground, forgotten in his sudden need for defense.

Gunn rushed to the vampire and dragged his limp form back to the relative safety of the sidelines. Angel rubbed at his now unconstricted throat. Good thing he didn’t need to breathe or he’d be dead by now.

*I knew I never liked that guy…*

He was preparing to jump back into the fight when he noticed Buffy - seriously kicking Riley’s ass.

“Damn. Do you SEE that girl?” Gunn’s eyes were wide with awe.

“Yeah.” His voice was still hoarse from the choke hold.

They followed her progress as she danced back and forth across the grass, moving so quickly it was almost hard to see.

“She always fight like that?”

“Buffy’s always been good – but no. I’ve never seen her like this before.”

All eyes were pinned on the Slayer, fighting for all she was worth - and winning.

Spike finally rallied enough to crawl back toward the group, somewhat recovered. He was met by Fred, who wrapped a blanket around him. She didn’t know what else to do.

“Thanks, Pet.” He coughed. “ ‘Preciate it.”

He took a moment to check for damage, patting all the important parts. He cupped his intact package gratefully. Satisfied of his relative wholeness he turned his eyes to the fight. He wanted to see how his Slayer was doing. When he caught sight of her, he grinned.

*There’s my girl.*

Buffy was literally beating the Hell out of Riley. The mage’s former evil appearance had been replaced by a Midwestern college kid sporting two black eyes, a split lip and a bloody nose. With a whipping sidekick she had him on his knees. Sword overhead she bonked him on the top of his skull. She used the solid metal end cap to bash him in his face, the crunch as it broke his nose was just as satisfying as she imagined it would be. He fell backwards holding his battered face, blood dripping through his cupped hands. Buffy pressed her advantage. A quick boot heel to the solar plexus and he was on his back. She raised the Claymore threateningly.

“I want you to listen to me, Riley. Because I’m only going to say this once;”
The sword tip pressed below his Adam’s apple. “Leave town. NOW.” She applied pressure to the blade for emphasis. “Because so help me, - if I ever see you again,” the tip pressed in another fraction of an inch. “I won’t be able to stop myself from killing you.”

Riley looked at the deadly creature in front of him, and for the first time he truly saw the Slayer within her. He saw the darkness in her eyes - and trembled. He didn’t know this girl. Maybe he never had.

He nodded his head, defeated.

“Go then.”

He scrambled back from her blade, only turning to run after he was clear of it.

Buffy stood, sword in hand until he was out of sight. Then she dropped the blade to the ground and ran to Spike. Falling to her knees beside him, she cooed tenderly over her singed lover.

“Oh Baby, how bad are you? What can I do?”

He coughed up a small puff of smoke and gave her a shaky smile.

“You can help me up for starters.” She extended her hand and pulled him to his feet, tucking herself under his arm for support. “Now you can kiss me.” She smiled and kissed him sweetly on his bruised mouth, her heart singing to have him whole and in her arms again. Together they limped slowly back towards the assembled members of Angel’s team.

“Nice bit of fightin’ you did there, Slayer.” He smiled at her admiringly.

“Nobody messes with MY man.”

“Remind me never to get you brassed off at me, Pet.”

“Oh, but I already am! I know you said something to set him off.” She poked him with an accusatory finger. “And what did I tell you?”

“I know, I know…behave m’self.” He put his hands up in a conciliatory gesture. “ Sorry, Love – it’s just that wanker irritates me. You know I’m not good at controlling m’ mouth.”

“It does seem to get the better of ya on the regular.”

“Yeah well, as long as it got me you, Baby.” And he shot her that roguish grin that made her melt.

“It wasn’t just your mouth…” She whispered kissing him once more, slower this time.

“Yeah?” His voice dropped to a husky whisper as he pulled her closer. “What else then?”

Cordelia had the presence of mind to clear her throat before the two love birds got carried away. She was so not prepared to see a Slayer and master vampire going at it today. The couple in question turned to see the gaping mouths of Wesley, Fred and Gunn as well as Cordelia’s amused smile and Angel’s unhappy scowl.

“Oh, hi Guys.” Buffy smiled brightly.

“Did I mention we’re together now?”


*** The end of one problem for our heroes...but what of Faith? Glory? And how will Angel handle the news of Spike's involvement with Buffy?? Stay tuned for more intrigue in the next episode of Vamps of Our Lives....***
Chapter Forty Four ~ Jealousy by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
Banner created by the lovely & talented Kargrif! Thank you, Doll it's PERFECT! Mwah!
***I'm baaaack...didja miss me? Here's a spankin' new chapter just for you, Loyal Readers. Thanks for all of your requests & comments! It keeps me working on this crazy story, even when I don't wanna. *Big Loves* Rosie xoxoxox****



Chapter Forty Four ~ Jealousy

“I don’t want to look but I’m already hooked on jealousy.
I can’t believe you had a life before me.
I can’t believe they let you run around free.
Just putting your body wherever it seemed like a good idea.
What a good idea.

Imagining me behind your eyes – and what did I see?
I saw hips, I saw thighs.
I saw secret positions that we’ve never tried.
I saw jealousy. I saw jealousy.
It’s all I can do to contain my feelings of jealousy…”

~ Liz Phair

They were regrouping in the industrial district. Spike knew of an abandoned warehouse with room to hold them all and enough privacy for a proper meeting. There was sewer access if they needed a quick escape and a coupla fast food joints ‘round the corner for the humans. With any luck his stash of weapons and supplies was still there. He eyed his scorched and battered t-shirt disapprovingly. He needed a change of clothes and some Jim Beam, stat. It’d been a long night already, but it looked like an even longer day lay ahead. Not bloody likely Angel popped by for a social call - Spike smelled Apocalypse on the wind. He sighed wearily.

They still had Dawn to find and the Faith situation to manage. He knew Buffy was upset about her mates as well and would want to make it right - though he’d just as soon let ‘em hang. Red was alright and he liked Anya and Tara well enough, but the Whelp and Watcher he could do without just fine.

He shifted himself to a more comfortable position, moving his leg further away from Gunn’s. He had offered to walk and save room in the crowded car but Buffy wouldn’t hear of it. Wish she would have let him, give him a moment to sort this whole mess out and come up with a plan of action. So much to do now, and he had a feeling time was running out. All he needed was a pint or two of O-neg and a good day’s rest, but let her fuss. Truth was he was actually enjoying it - particularly with Angel watching and glowering with jealous disapproval every moment. If he weren’t already inclined to kiss and cuddle his Slayer to bits he would’ve made the extra effort just to see that look on the Poof’s face.

*Bloody priceless.*

Buffy sat with her head cradled on his chest in the back seat, leg slung over his lap, arms tight around him as if afraid to let go. He could feel Angel’s eyes boring into him from the rearview. He may not be able to see the reflection, but he could feel them like hot pinpricks.

*If looks could kill, Peaches.*

He smirked and kissed the top of his girl’s golden head.

*That’s right, Angel – MY girl. Better get used to it you daft prick.*

He had a moment to wonder just what Angel was seeing; Buffy wrapped around an invisible man, snuggled up tight to nothing…

*Probably just enough to make him crazy.*

Spike grinned at the thought. He began thinking of ways to add to his torture; what if he stroked her back a bit more so her clothes moved as well?

*Let him wonder where my hands are…*

The thought made him want to snicker madly. After all the years that brooding bastard had tormented him, made him feel less than shite – Spike couldn’t help enjoying the opportunity to give a little back. Buffy interrupted his thoughts of gleeful torment;

“Never leave me, kay?”

She murmured into his chest.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, Kitten.”

He replied softly settling her closer. Suddenly Angel didn’t seem quite so important. The competition between them appeared so terribly small and petty compared to the precious package he held in his arms. He had Buffy, he had her love - all he had wanted, dreamed of for so long. What else mattered?

*Only her – as always.*

He sighed and closed his eyes, ignoring the invisible glares of the other vampire.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cordelia eyed the cozy couple from the confines of the passenger seat.

*Weird.*

Though not all that surprising in a way. Little Miss Stakes-A-Lot always did have a thing for the fists-and-fangs type. Not to mention a man in black leather…but then again who didn’t like that? Her eyes slid over to Angel, surreptitiously admiring the cut of his Armani trench coat. You had to give the man credit, for a depressive he had excellent taste.

*A little too much black though.*

You’d think he’d throw in a touch of bright red or maybe a flash of purple every now and again just to shake things up. But no, that would be far too derivative from his Trent-Reznor-is-my-soulmate persona. She sighed and leaned her head on the cool glass of the window, inching marginally away from Fred on the seat. The sky was only just beginning to lighten the farthest edge of the horizon.

It was going to be a really long day.

She could just tell.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The longer Faith sat and thought and smoked the more her guts boiled.
Why was she the one hiding out? She didn’t do anything wrong! She wasn’t the fucked up one. She wasn’t the liar here. The backstabber.

*The whore.*

She thought venomously. She paced the short walk in front of their dingy motel, chain smoking and watching cars whiz by on the interstate. They were all going somewhere. But all night she sat here; stuck inside that lousy room, staring sightlessly at the TV, the wall, the cracked and yellowed popcorn ceiling. She never slept. Just let her mind fixate on and replay every conversation, every look, every touch. She tried to find the moment that Spike stopped loving her. The moment his heart went to Buffy.

*That bitch.*

But it all bled together like watercolors. She couldn’t find anything ‘cept memories that made her cry, made her long for him and miss him so bad it was like a dull ache in her gut. The kind you get after somebody kicks you in the stomach. The kind that leaves you hurting and hollow for hours after.

She kept her tears from Dawn. Grateful when her sister passed out at last, crashed out from an all day sugar high. Then she let ‘em come, thinkin’ about every time they ever kissed and how he always took her hand no matter where they were. Spike never acted like he was ashamed of her, or like he didn’t wanna be seen with her. And he never made her feel like he wanted her to be different, to change. He was the only guy that ever made her feel like she was okay just like she was, like he liked her that way.

And it was good. All of it was good. They never fought - not each other anyway. She smirked thinking ‘bout the million and one vamps they dusted together. They just kicked ass, laughed, and fucked. He even took a shine to her little sister. Anybody could see he was crazy about the kid, just like she was. She stopped her pacing to steal a look at Dawn, sprawled diagonally across their double bed, mouth wide and snoring ungraciously. Her heart swelled a little just looking at her. How could you not love that kid?

Faith loved Dawn with everything that she was. It never mattered to her if her memories were real or manufactured. Dawn was part of her, her very own blood ran in her veins. Wherever she came from Dawn belonged to her now - they belonged to each other. And she’d be goddamned if she was gonna let anyone take her away.

*Never!*

She thought fiercely. She threw her cigarette stub to the ground and stomped on it. In her mind there was a little blonde head underneath the heavy tread of her biker boots. She’d love nothing more than to smash Buffy’s skull like a grape and watch it pop. The mental image that produced made her grin for the first time all night.

Man, if she could only show Spike what a fake-ass little bitch Buffy really was. She just laid on her Little Miss Perfect act and he bought it, hook and all. How could he be so smart and so goddamn dumb at the same time?

*Typical guy – thinkin’ with his dick.*

She grimaced at the instant visual she got of Buffy leading him around by it, Spike grinning moronically the whole time. Before she could stop it the scene changed into something sexual, Buffy and Spike a tangle of limbs on the ground. She’d already seen the live show. More than she ever wanted to and far too much to ever forget. Her brain was a tricky thing, when it wasn’t playing her painful memories of her and Spike it was dishing out detailed scenarios of him and Buffy – both real and imagined. How considerately he had laid his coat down for her. How lovingly he had touched her – with tenderness, with reverence. A far cry from the primal coupling they shared the first time, cracking tombstones on the way to an empty crypt. Throwing each other against walls and sarcophagi, ending with a brutal fuck on the cold stone floor.

She couldn’t help but imagine how their first time was, all roses and candlelight. Was it at his place? In his bed? Or would he spring for a classy joint downtown? Would he take her out first? Romance her over a pricey meal? In Faith’s mind it was everything but a honeymoon. She could picture it perfectly; the white satin sheets, the rose petals on the bed, the loving looks they would share.

“Uhg!”

She ground her fist into her eyes, trying to stop the unwanted visuals.

“Why am I torturing myself?”

Why was she? When there was someone else who actually deserved it? Someone who lied and cheated and stole things that didn’t belong to her. A little blonde princess that fooled everyone into thinking she was perfect.

*Enough of this sittin’ around shit!*

She never was much for the run-and-hide. Action always suited her better. Time to take some. Far as she could see, Buffy was the cause of all her problems. And she knew how to take care of problems didn’t she?

Faith smiled nastily, a feral grin in the moonlight.
Had any vampires been present they would have run for their lives.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A round of burgers and an hour’s rest found them all slightly refreshed and able to focus enough to have a brief summit. They improvised a small semi-circle of crates and boxes in a corner of the large storehouse. Wesley took the floor in full Watcher mode, starting off the meeting. Buffy found herself impressed, this was a far cry from the stumbling idiot she’d first met. It seemed Wes had finally found his footing. He turned the floor over to Cordelia after a brief introduction and let her describe her vision, and therefore the Angel Team’s presence in Sunnydale. Spike and Buffy exchanged a weary look.

Just one more thing to deal with on a very long list; Dawn, Faith, disgruntled friends and family, not to mention a Hell God with a vendetta and a bad home perm. Buffy rubbed her tired eyes and took a deep breath. She was surprised to find she hadn’t given her dream, or the Apocalypse it implied, very much thought lately. No more bad dreams either - just like all of her other thoughts they were now filled almost entirely with

“Spike.”

She whispered it softly, reaching for him. He turned a sweet smile her way and squeezed her hand in his. Whatever happened they had each other. He would fight by her side against whatever Hell managed to send their way. She had a feeling it wouldn’t have much of a chance against the two of them, they made a formidable team. And with Angel and his crew here, well…somehow she wasn’t as worried about the impending Apocalypse as she was about finding Dawn. She tuned in to hear Wes explaining the plan to take on Glory.

“Small problem with the whole double-team of Slayers thing, Guys.” She interrupted. “Faith is MIA again.”

“What?!” Angel looked exasperated. “Where the hell did she go this time?”

“We don’t know.”

Buffy and Spike exchanged an inscrutable look. They’d have to confer later about how much to tell. Some things were family business and Angel wasn’t family anymore.

“Doesn’t Giles know?” Angel asked testily. “He’s her Watcher.”

“Yeah, well we all know how much Faith likes to share with her Watcher.”

Buffy gave Wesley a sympathetic look.

“Too true.” He smiled.

So the girl hadn’t become any more manageable. It gave him a bit of comfort, and increased his respect for Rupert Giles all the more.

*If anyone could handle that child at all…*

“Looks like priority one is finding the other Slayer.” Gunn put in.

“Agreed.” Wesley nodded. “We’ll need both Slayers at full capacity for the upcoming battle.”

“She could be anywhere by now.” Angel threw up his hands. “Last time she was in New Orleans for Mardi Gras!” He growled, remembering the last minute scramble to find the Slayer before Apocalypse number 4 hit last year.

“Spike and I have some leads.” Buffy suggested. “Why don’t you let us find her while you guys start the prep work.”

Angel didn’t like the secretive look he saw pass between them. She never used to keep secrets from him. Time was he knew all that was in her heart. It was a bitter pill to swallow that she was closed off to him now - made even more so that she chose to share herself with Spike. He couldn’t help imagining just what kind of sharing they’d been doing – he could smell Spike all over her. Not an enormous leap to fill in those blanks. And how many times had he seen the boy in action? They’d shared both Drusilla and Darla, and had been in a million compromising positions together over a century. It was all too easy to imagine him doing those things to Buffy – “Servicing her,” as Spike liked to say. That boy always did have an odd oral fixation…

The thought made him ill. He knew what a manipulator Spike was. What had he done to get to her? To turn her to him? Probably took advantage of Buffy while she was dealing with her problems with Riley. He could only imagine the kind of troubles that would lead Finn into black magic. If only he had known, he would have come. He could have helped her, been there for her. He would be comforting her now…but Spike was in his way.

*Again.*

He eyed the other vampire with distaste, brow furrowing. He hadn’t liked the boy from the moment Drusilla brought him home. Far too cocksure and full of swagger, always dragging the group into some kind of scuffle. He was mouthy and insolent from the start, never knew his proper place. Spike refused to be broken of his arrogance no matter how many beatings or buggerings Angel dealt him. And his weakness with Drusilla – always doting on her and catering to her every mad whim.

*Love’s Bitch indeed.*

He grimaced sourly. The boy wasn’t worthy of Buffy - her strength, her courage, that lion’s heart. She was a true champion, and what was Spike next to that? He didn’t even have a soul! How can he love her without a soul??

*He can’t. He doesn’t.*

This thing between them was nothing real, some kind of bizarre rebound fling. Nothing like the true and genuine love he shared with Buffy.

Angel had tried to step back, to let her have the normal life she deserved. But look how that turned out… He should have known that schoolboy was no match for her. And Spike! It was monstrous he be allowed to lay hands on her, he was little more than a fledgeling - in no way deserving of a girl like Buffy.

Angel knew in his heart that she belonged with another champion. Someone who would fight by her side, love her and protect her. Someone capable of loving her with all his soul, the way she deserved to be loved.

And if she was to love a vampire…

*Then let it be me.*



***Ooooooo, that doesn't sound good. I sense a smackdown comin'...Stay tuned, True Believers...***
Chapter Forty Five ~ Hit Me With Your Best Shot by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
No way? A new chapter?? WAY. Another one coming too... - xox Rosie
Chapter Forty Five ~ Hit Me With Your Best Shot


"Well you're a real tough cookie with a long history
Of breaking little hearts, like the one in me.
That's O.K., lets see how you do it
Put up your dukes, let's get down to it.
Hit Me With Your Best Shot!
Why Don't You Hit Me With Your Best Shot?
Hit Me With Your Best Shot!
Fire Away."

~ Pat Benatar




A three hour meeting yielded a preliminary plan, the first step being the location of the other Slayer. It was generally agreed (by everyone except Angel) that Spike and Buffy would handle it. Meanwhile Wes and Fred would research magickal tactics plus Glory’s origins, Gunn would stock up on weapons and Cordy and Angel would return to Los Angeles to collect Lorne and badly needed supplies. Buffy realized she’d have to bring in Giles and the gang sooner rather than later. If Cordelia’s vision was even remotely accurate they’d need both teams for the upcoming battle. She felt reluctant to even pick up the phone right now. There was so very much drama and didn’t she have enough to do already? She sighed.

Blah.

The LA group seemed to simply accept that they were together and be generally okay with the idea. She didn’t have to justify herself or explain anything – they were just Buffy and Spike; your not-so-average couple. But within her own circle of friends the accusations and judgments were a-flyin’. She seriously did not want to deal.

Can’t I stay in denial just a tiny bit longer? It’s such a happy place…

They were so wrong and so dead set on their own opinions, Giles especially. How on earth was she supposed to make them see Spike the way she saw him? Or make them understand that this was really the only choice for her? She set her jaw stubbornly. Well they were just gonna have to suck it up. Whatever happened, whatever world she ended up in - she chose Spike. Period. He caught her anxious frowning and moved to her side.

“Don’t fash yerself, Pet. They’ll come ‘round eventually.”

Her eyebrows rose in surprise, but she smiled.

“How do you always know?”

He grinned.

“Know my girl s’all.”

She went automatically to the comfort of his arms, and settled in with a sigh.

“You really do.”

He rested his head on top of hers and enjoyed the sweet warmth of her nestled against him. For just a brief moment the world ceased to exist outside of the small, contented bubble that held only the two of them.

From across the room Angel glowered at his unworthy rival.

The boy was in his way.

Again.

But not for long…


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Spike slipped out the back door of the warehouse into the cool shadows of the alley. He wanted a breather from the crowd and a nice long cigarette. It had been one helluva day. He leaned up against the brick wall of the building getting comfortable, pondering the evening’s events.

Buffy was amazing, watching her fight for him…he didn’t have words. No one had ever done that before. No one had ever loved him enough to champion him, to fight for his life. Even Drusilla had left him at the mercies of Angelus or some other monster on several occasions. It made him tough, scrappy – he could fight like the devil, could take care of himself now. But it left him lonely too. He was pleased to feel that constant hole inside had eased. He wasn’t lonely anymore.

Angel watched Spike leave the warehouse and saw his opportunity. He could finally have the confrontation that had been brewing in his gut from the moment he saw him with Buffy. He deftly maneuvered his way out of the crowd and out the back door, shutting it quietly behind him.

Spike sensed his rival before he saw him and sighed.

“Was wonderin’ when you were gonna show up.”

“Yeah?”

“Knew you couldn’t resist a chance to have your say, Peaches.” He turned to face him, squaring his shoulders for the assault to come. “So let’s have it then.”

Angel’s face twisted in a grimace of revulsion.

“I can smell you all over her.”

“Stings a bit does it?” Spike smirked and took a deep drag on his cigarette.

Angel snorted.

“It would if I thought this was anything real.”

“Realer than anything you ever had.” He shot back, tossing his smoke.

Angel laughed.

“Are you so daft you can’t see it, Boy?” He poked a finger in his chest “You’re just the rebound guy, Spikey.”

Spike growled low in his throat, a warning.

“Soon as she’s done getting over Riley – she’ll be done with you.”

That did it. He grabbed Angel by the lapels of his expensive coat and slammed him up against the wall.

“And I suppose you think that leaves her open for you then.”

“Better me than you.” He spat, making the last word contain every ounce of disgust and disapproval he could muster.

It was Spike’s turn to laugh now. He released him with a small shove.

“Because you can give her everything she needs.” The sarcasm fairly dripped.

“I have a soul.” Angel replied earnestly. “I can love her.”

“I love her too!” Spike threw up his hands, exasperated. “More than you ever could, you arrogant, self-centered pillock.” He paced the confines of the alley, irritated. He stopped suddenly to grin at his nemesis. “And hey, side benefit here – I can actually fuck her. Longer and better and more bloody often than you could ever even dream of.” He leaned in close “I’ve tasted her, Angel – you ever do that? Would you like me to describe it to you? How she’s sweet like a peach and tangy like honey – or how the flavor changes just before she comes. Shall I catalog for you the look she gets on her first orgasm of the night? How about the third? Or the fifth?”

Angel launched himself at him with a roar, fangs extended.

“ She was sweet and beautiful and pure and you just had to sully that didn’t you?” His first punch sent Spike’s head snapping back. “That’s all you are. That’s all you do…you destroy, you denigrate.” He hit him again and again, emphasizing each point. “It wasn’t enough to kill the Slayer - you had to drag her down to your level!!”

A boot to the chest sent Angel reeling.

“I think you’re confusing me with some one else, Mate. That would be your MO. Angelus was the destroyer – not me. As you might recall I stayed with Drusilla for over a century and all I ever did was love her and take care ‘f her. And who was it that destroyed Dru in the first place?” He popped him a solid one to the chin and watched with satisfaction as his head snapped back hard, his body following. Angel hit the alley floor and Spike stood over him. “Oh yes – that would be you.” He leaned over his prone body, picking him up by the lapels to get in his face. “Now get this through your thick skull, Peaches; I love Buffy and she loves me. And there’s not a damn thing you or anyone else can do about it.” He dropped Angel to the ground with a thud. “I went easy on you tonight for Buffy’s sake – she still thinks there’s some good hiding under that great brooding melon of yours.” He poked the melon in question. “But if you ever try to come between us again, I’ll dust you without a second thought.”

He stood up to walk away, leaving Angel bleeding on the ground.

“This isn’t over.” Angel called out.

Spike stopped and looked back over his shoulder with a smirk.

“Oh yes. It is.”



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



She was glad to be out on the hunt again, outside patrolling the cemeteries. It felt normal, natural, right. Even if she was out hunting humans. Faith was sure Spike and Buffy would be out tonight, looking for Dawn if nothing else. While her natural Slayer instincts sorted through a thousand clues of tracks, scents and sounds, her mind worked on the situation relentlessly. Replaying what she had seen and heard yesterday and what it all meant. How was it down to Us and Them again? Giles and the Scoobies, Buffy and Spike - all against her and Dawn. Did they really think she wouldn’t fight for her own fucking sister?!

Dawn was the only person who ever loved her unconditionally. For reals, no strings attached. Faith could remember when she was just a toddler; following her big sister around the house in her diaper, all chubby-cheeked with little brown ringlets and those big blue eyes. She used to tug on her pant leg and say; “Up Fay! Up!” and Faith would always do it. Pick her up and carry her until her arms were sore. Because Mom wouldn’t. Or couldn’t. She was too drunk or out at work or with some new guy. She never had time for them.

But that was okay with Faith, ‘cause they had each other. They took care of each other. And there were peanut butter and jelly sammiches, belly button zerberts and marathon games of go fish. There was tag and stick ball and boys to run away from (when kissing was still yucky) or towards (when it wasn’t). And everyone knew you do not touch Dawn.

Curtis Stiller lost a tooth when he tried to take her lunch money back in third grade. Dawn came to her sister at lunchtime, sniffling back tears. Faith took one look at her and saw red. She still remembered the white-hot rage she felt then. She found him in his little group of thugs and didn’t even bother to call him out. Just dragged his fat ass across the lunch table and beat the snot out of him.

Come to think of it maybe it was three teeth…

Nobody ever messed with Dawn after that. Faith protected her from everyone. She took the beatings from Mom or whatever jerk she was with that week. And when they got older (“developed” was the word Uncle Ted had used) she took the groping too. If any of their “Uncles” tried to get handsy Faith would make sure Dawn’s door was locked at night. But hers would be open. ‘Cause she could take it. You just pretended like you weren’t there, went somewhere else in your head until they were done. And it was fine. As long as Dawn was safe she could do anything.

And now, here comes Buffy trying to take her away. Like it didn’t matter, all those years together. Like she didn’t matter. Faith felt that familiar white hot rage coming on again. That bitch, tryin’ to take everything she had. Her boyfriend, her Watcher, her goddamned sister! Like Buffy didn’t have everything already?? Look at that huge rock on her hand – she was marrying Captain fucking America! And she had a mother - a real one. Not some drunken skag that didn’t give a shit about her own kids. Her mom made hot chocolate and worried about where she was. Her mom gave out hugs, good ones too. She hugged Faith one night, when Buffy had given her the news that she was retiring. Joyce had gotten teary-eyed and hugged Faith hard. Thanked her for giving Buffy a real future. Faith just sat there, like she was made of stone or wood or something. Nobody ever hugged her before, not like that – ‘cept maybe Dawn. She didn’t know how to take it. But she remembered it. How warm and soft and nice smelling Joyce was. Like a real mom should be.

And Buffy had all that. But it still wasn’t enough.

Greedy little twat.

Well, she’d be damned if she was gonna let Buffy have her way this time. The moment she got her hands on the bitch –

Game over.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Cordelia watched Spike enter the back door of the warehouse. Without Angel.

She knew they’d had words. Angel had been gunning for Spike since he first laid eyes on him. She suspected it had something to do with his patheticly lingering Buffy obsession. Sad really. But still, no reason to dust the guy.

“Everything okay?” She inquired, starting to worry.

“Peachy keen, Princess.” Spike grinned.

Well if that doesn’t sound sinister…

She hustled out to the alley only to find Angel leaning against the wall gingerly patting at the cut above his eye. Cordelia was relieved yet annoyed at the same time. An emotional combo she had become all too familiar with since her freshman year at Sunnydale High.

“Good Lord…” She checked him for serious damage, fussing; “what did you do?”

“What did I do? He hit me!”

“Yeah? And what did you say to provoke him, huh?”

She pulled a kleenex out of her purse and dabbed away the collected blood.

“Hey, I thought you were on my team here.”

“I am on your team, Angel - which is why I’m telling you to drop this.”

“But I’m -”

“Seriously. This obsession you have going with Buffy is so tired.”

“But, Cordy -”

“And have you seen the way she looks at him? Or the way he looks at her…guh.”

“Cordelia!”

“Honestly, do you think you stand a chance?” She looked at him seriously. “I may not like the guy, but even I can see what Spike & Buffy have going.” She stood up. “It’s the real deal. You might wanna start getting used to it.” Angel found he didn’t have anything to say.

She turned to go inside, at the door she looked back over her shoulder at him.

“Clean yourself up a little before you come in. I don’t want you worrying the others.”


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Caught up in conversation Buffy hardly noticed Spike’s departure into the alley. Fred was regaling her with tales of LA shopping sprinkled with amusing anecdotes about life with Angel. Her eyes lit up when she said his name, it wasn’t hard to see what the sweet, shy girl was feeling.

Looks like somebody has a crush.

She smiled. Buffy was surprised to find that she wasn’t jealous in the least. She wished him well, maybe a girl like Fred would be good for him. Lord knows she was happy with what she had. That thought had her scanning the room for Spike. He entered the back door with his usual sense of timing, sporting several new bruises. Buffy gaped and crossed the room to his side in an instant.

“What happened?” She demanded.

“Nothing, Luv.”

She gestured at the fresh bruise on his swelling mouth.

“That doesn’t look like nothing to me.” She scanned the room quickly looking for Angel. “Where is he?!”

She should have known he’d start something…or was it Spike? She was quickly running out of patience.

“Tell me what happened? Did he start it or did you?”

He gently rubbed her arms, soothing.

“Relax, Love. Angel an’ me just had to work a few things out s’all.”

“You didn’t dust him did you?” She looked at him for a horrified moment.

“Would that be such a loss?”

“Spike!”

He sighed and rolled his eyes.

“No, no. No dusting. Look here comes the Wanker now.” He gestured to the back door.

Angel entered behind Cordy, looking sheepish.

Buffy was just about to go read him the riot act when Spike grabbed her arm.

“Leave it be, Buffy.”

“But he…you…with the hitting!”

“It’s alright, Luv. I told you. We worked it out.”

He looked her in the eye and she saw he meant it.

“Is it done? Tell me it’s done.”

Spike looked at Angel for a moment, catching his eyes.

“It’s done.” he said with finality.

Angel looked away.
Chapter Forty Six ~ Mama Said Knock You Out by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
***Hold on to your hats, kiddies - it's going to be a bumpy ride... ;) ***
Chapter Forty Six ~ Mama Said Knock You Out



“Listen to the way I slay your crew

Damage, destruction, terror, and mayhem

Pass me a sissy so suckas I'll slay him…





I’m gonna knock you out.



Mama said knock you out.”







~ LL Cool J











Spike and Buffy left the warehouse at dusk. First stop: Faith’s apartment. Not a chance she was still there, but she might’ve left some leads behind. The duo made their way to a nondescript stucco block on the East side of town, stereotypically close to the railroad tracks. Spike dug the spare key out of its hidey hole and opened the door to the tiny apartment. Buffy tried hard to ignore the fact that her boyfriend knew where that key was. They both had ex-lovers and checkered pasts (Spike quite a bit more so maybe) it was best to just let it be. But still...it prickled at her like cactus spines in the skin. Why did Faith seem to be a part of everything in her life?! She’d laid her hands on every man Buffy had ever loved now. It ate at her, her anger was a steady, acid boil beneath the surface. A reckoning was surely due...



That thought drove her forward, searching the apartment relentlessly for clues. An inspection of the rooms made it clear the two girls had packed in a rush; there were clothes spilling from drawers and shoes toppling out of closets. Cupboards stood open in the kitchen and dirty dishes were piled in the sink, meanwhile the apartment itself was cold and dark. No one had been home for at least 24 hours. They searched the apartment from top to bottom and found a frustrating lack of leads. Even the phone was dead, so there was no chance of pulling a *69 or redial.



*Damn Faith and her inability to pay a fucking bill on time.*



Buffy thought bitterly. She was already tired of playing chase, felt like she’d been at this game for too many years already. They made a second sweep of the apartment and small side yard just to be sure. Nothing there but an ancient hibachi and some mismatched patio furniture. Buffy pushed away her imaginings of happy family barbecues, Spike manning the grill while Dawn laughed and Faith brought him beer and kisses. It was too easy to picture him here, fitting right in to the home Faith was clearly trying to make for Dawn. Buffy swallowed her bitterness and turned away from the battered screen door. Better to concentrate on the task at hand, ignore all these bad thoughts till... never. She didn’t want to look too closely at what might-have-been; Spike a happy house-husband here with Faith while she was chained to Riley living out the American Dream in nowhere, Iowa.



She sighed and tried to refocus. It looked like the next stop was a grand tour of Sunnydale’s finest cemetaries. Spike knew of at least 20 crypts that would accommodate the runaways and Faith would be in her element there. It made sense she’d go to ground somewhere familiar. It was going to be a long and tedious night - this little town was home to no less than a dozen graveyards. They’d have to comb through each one.



Spike rushed to reassure her that Dawn would be found soon, that she was absolutely safe and Faith would never do anything to harm her. “As far as she’s concerned Dawn’s her only real family. She loves her, would do anything for her. There’s no way in hell she’d ever hurt her, Buffy – I promise you.”



It was hard to mesh the picture he painted of Faith as devoted sister to the one Buffy had in her head. The Faith she knew was a monster, and so far this one hadn’t done much to make her think otherwise. But Spike had never lied to her and she didn’t think he’d be so calm if he believed Dawn was in danger, he loved her little sister almost as much as she did. She allowed herself to take comfort in his certainty.



Thank God he was here. She felt his strength and support deeply. Not since Angel had she felt this kind of partnership. But even then Angel had only been there when he chose to be, whether she needed him or no. While Spike’s loyalty and devotion were unflagging. He was always there, no matter what she said or did. He was rock-solid back up come hell or high water.



She felt her desire for him more powerfully than ever. In spite of the constant low-grade worry, in spite of everything really she wanted him now. Or maybe it was because of everything that happened today... She almost lost him, and how crazy and unfair would that be after they finally, really found each other? Spike was obviously feeling it too, he couldn’t seem to stop touching her, looking at her as if he were memorizing her face. While his restless hands wandered over her body constantly; caressing, teasing, tickling. Ramping up the tension between them to almost unbearable levels.



After everything that happened today, Buffy found herself wanting to touch him all the more, to be reassured of his wholeness and his presence. And Spike…well Spike had always been handsy to say the least. They patrolled the graveyards as a team for an hour before finally deciding to split up. They would cover more ground that way, not to mention it was far less distracting to be apart. Together they were preoccupied and kissy, far too easily wrapped up in each other. They were torn between tenderness and longing but couldn’t seem to decide which to focus on first.



It had come to an (almost literal) head not ten minutes ago. They’d gotten within an inch of making love in the Browning crypt; clothes undone, limbs and mouths a feverish tangle. It was only Buffy reminding him of Dawn that stopped that train. It was then Spike reluctantly put forth the idea that they separate. They couldn’t seem to contain the feelings that were now threatening to overwhelm all else - and there was so much to be done now, with so little time to left to do it.



“Can’t focus with you around, Luv.” He kissed her then. “Can’t keep my hands off you.”



Buffy chuckled.



“Could you ever?”



“No.” he laughed and kissed her again. “But now, almost losing you today-”



She silenced him with her mouth.



“Don’t say it. Please.”



He rested his forehead on hers.



“I know. Can’t stand the thought myself - but it very nearly happened.”



“No!” she hissed fiercely. “It will never happen.”



Spike raised his brow with a smirk.



“Fixin’ to cheat death, are ya, Slayer?”



“Yes!” she looked indignant. “I’ll fight death and Glory and anyone else that tries to pull us apart!”



Her chin was set in that stubborn way he loved. He laughed and pulled her into his lap.



“That’s my girl. Fighter to the last.”



“I’d fight anyone for you.” She said earnestly.



“And vice-versa, Pet. Have no doubts.”



“I know.” She hugged him tight and was reassured to feel his strength surrounding her.



“We should go." He kissed the top of her head. "Find Dawn. Get this whole Faith mess sorted.”



Buffy sighed.



“Yeah.” She parted from him reluctantly, adjusting her clothes while Spike eyed her wolfishly.



“Close one, eh, Slayer?” he waggled his eyebrows at her.



“And you said you wanted to wait, Mr. Romance. Something about a proper bed…”



She stood on her toes to kiss him.



“S’what you deserve, Buffy.” His voice was husky. “But as for wanting to wait…”

He pulled her close and let her feel the evidence of all his want.



She inhaled sharply and pulled him down by the hair at the nape of his neck. Spike growled and devoured her with a hungry kiss.



“Could have you now, Slayer.”



“Now. Here. Anywhere…” She breathed. Buffy was barely resisting the urge to throw him down and ride him like a show pony.



He growled again, this time in frustration and set her decidedly away from him.



“Dawn.” He said firmly.



“Dawn.” She agreed with a sigh.



“So, apart then, Love?”



“Looks like that’s the only way we’re gettin’ anything accomplished.”



“You know... I've always considered gettin’ you off an accomplishment.” He gave her a wicked grin.



“Stop that, you! You’ll get us all riled up again and I don’t know how much willpower I have left.”



.“I’m with you on that one...” Lust-filled eyes wandered over her body as his tongue touched his front teeth in that smouldery way that made her melt.



“Don’t look at me in that tone of voice…”



He shook his head and sighed.



“So off I go then.”



“Yes.” She nodded firmly. “Good decision.”



“Meet you back at the warehouse at daybreak?”



Buffy nodded and looked him in the eye.



“I love you, you know.” she said quietly.



He smiled, loving the sound of those words from her lips.



“Love you too, Sweet Bit.”



He moved to kiss her then thought better of it.



That way lies madness…



“Promise me you'll be careful of Faith now." His brow furrowed with gravity. "She’s wicked jealous of you, Pet. She might try something. She might not hurt Dawn but she’d have no problem hurting you.”



“ I know.” She replied, equally serious. “She’s already done massive damage in my world.”



Spike dared only the briefest kiss across the back of her hand before leaving.



Buffy smiled as she picked her way through Restfield. He really was the sweetest thing. As if she couldn’t handle Faith. She’d put her in the hospital once already, she could certainly do it again. And the way she was feeling about Faith these days – she’d even enjoy it.



Thinking of their last fight turned Buffy’s smile into a grin. The thought of kicking that skank’s ass was downright relaxing.



A husky chuckle broke the stillness of the night.



“Well, well, well...if it isn’t Little Red Riding Hood, all alone in the scary woods without her Big Bad.”



From out of the shadows of a tall, stone tomb stepped the devil herself.





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





“So is this the part where I say ‘My what a big mouth you have?’ Because, hey - already there.” Buffy snarked.



Faith smiled mockingly as she sauntered into view. “All the better to eat you with, baby.” She purred with a nasty wink. “Or is it ‘rip you to shreds while you die screaming’? I can never remember.”



A hand flew out in front of Buffy and planted itself on the stone wall beside her head. Faith leaned mock-casually against the crypt, blocking her way. “Ya know, B. I’m gettin’ really fuckin’ tired of you tryin’ to take my shit.” Buffy crossed her arms, not the least bit intimidated.



“What a coincidence.” She retorted. “I’m pretty damned tired of taking your shit myself.” She shot the other Slayer a brightly vicious smile. “ ‘Sides, I don’t think I took anything that didn’t want to be taken.”



Faith fell on her with a roar of indignation.



“ You just have ta have everything don’t ya?” She ground out leveling a solid right at her face. “You want my job, my sister, my man?” Left hook. “ Whatsamatter, B.? Too pathetic to get your own life? Gotta steal mine?”



She threw a sideways kick to the jaw, which Buffy ducked neatly.



“ Look who’s talking!” She shot back. “Who came to my town to take over my life? Whose friends are helping you, Faith? Whose Watcher?” She wove like a snake, Faith connecting with her only every third time.



Buffy felt the full force of her very righteous anger and let it fly. The last 2 years of lies, manipulation and hurt came rolling off her tongue;



“ You know it’s just so funny watching you now.” She landed an uppercut to the jaw, knocking Faith’s teeth together with a sharp clack. “I knew you couldn’t keep it up. Knew you were just waiting for the moment to show your true colors.” She blocked a return blow and followed up with a sharp jab. “You’re a vicious, psychotic killer.” Buffy planted a boot solidly in the girl’s chest sending her thudding to the ground. “In any world.” She smiled triumphantly.



Faith leapt from the dirt, stake in hand her eyes black with rage.



“ Whatcha gonna do Faith?” Buffy taunted, circling her. “Stake me?” She mocked.

“ Wouldn’t be the first murder you’ve committed.”



That stopped her cold.



“ What’re you talkin’ about? I never killed anyone.”



“ Not here. Not yet.”



Faith eyeballed her suspiciously.



“What do you mean?”



Buffy stood tall to look her enemy in the eye, drawing on her strength and fury.



“You killed a man in cold blood in my world.” She spat. “You poisoned Angel. Tortured Wesley. And you did your damndest to kill me. But I’m too strong for you, Faith - and I always will be.”



Buffy didn’t hold back when she kicked her in the face. A bootheel to the jaw had Faith on the ground again. It felt so fucking good. Finally that trashy whore was getting all that was coming to her. For every betrayal, every hurt, every insult Buffy owed her pain. The Slayer stood over her rival and grabbed her by the collar of her t-shirt, lining her up for a punch in the face. There was something primally satisfying about the crunch of her knuckles hitting Faith’s cheek bone. The skin split and began to bleed and she found that was satisfying too.



It was time for a beat down.



*Long past…*





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





Eros watched the two Slayers battle, seemingly to the death this time, and turned his bewilderment on Aphrodite.



“Mother, you cannot possibly have meant for this…this insanity to take place!”



He stood by in horror as Buffy picked Faith up by her lapels and threw her against the nearest tree. A lesser mortal would have suffered a broken spine and a cracked skull. Faith shook it off and crawled to her knees.



“Oh, but I did, Dear Boy. It was the will of the Powers – and beyond that, pure Fate is in motion here.”



“I don’t understand – wasn’t the mission to bring the Slayer and Vampire together?”



“In part, yes. It was important they become truly mated. But there are forces at work here you don’t yet realize. The Fates have created a tangled skein for the players in our little drama." She gestured to the dark-haired girl, bleeding on the ground. "Behold Faith; her soul owes much. That is why her path is such a difficult one. She must reach a turning point now or her true destiny will never be reached.”



Aphrodite turned towards Buffy who stood with fists raised, preparing to beat the life out of her adversary.



“Then there is the Slayer – fighting for what’s hers at last, claiming Spike in a way she never has. It solidifies their bond, you see. She also has issues to work out with Faith. Frankly she owes that girl a good thrashing.”



The Goddess looked at her son seriously.



“All that happens in this world will echo throughout all the worlds that are. Plans are being set in motion for the battle to come and things that happen here could tip the scales for good or ill. That is why we are still here, why we must guard these children closely and guide them as best we can.”



He shook his head in bewilderment.



“Mother, I had no idea. How could a simple love match be the foundation for so much?”



“Nothing is ever simple, Eros.” She smiled at him gently.



“Least of all Love.”





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





Faith landed a backhanded punch across the face and broke through Buffy’s hold on her. She sprung to her feet, eyes flaming, the front of her shirt in shreds.



“You’re a liar!”



“I’m a liar?” Buffy’s eyebrows rose to her hairline in disbelief. “You’ve done nothing but lie since you got here. ‘Oh my watcher’s on vacation. I’m just visiting’.” she mocked in a whiny voice.



“That’s not fair! I was scared. Kakistos-”



“But it never stopped, Faith! When you sided with the Mayor-”



“I never sided -”



“When you tried to fuck Angel and then poisoned him when he wouldn’t have you.”



“What?!?”



“When you took my body and fucked my boyfriend.”



“ What? Riley??”



“But most of all when you killed a man. You killed him and you showed not one fucking moment of remorse!”



When she hit Faith this time the other girl didn’t even try to stop her. Buffy planted her feet solidly and backhanded her across the face full force, watching as she hit the ground.



“You’re the liar. And a thief and a goddamned murderer.” Her green eyes glittered dangerously.



She pulled her fist back for a follow up punch when the look on Faith’s face stopped her.

Her brown eyes were wide – and full of tears. She looked lost and forlorn and somehow innocent. If such a thing were possible.



“I don’t understand this. I don’t understand any of this...” Her tears spilled over and trickled down her cheeks. Faith looked up at her wide-eyed, split lip bleeding. “I’m not a killer…I’m the Slayer.” She said earnestly.



Suddenly all of the heat went out of Buffy’s anger. She felt deflated, like a balloon someone let the air out of. Faith didn’t look like Faith anymore. She bore no resemblance to the swaggering, loud-mouthed tramp she was used to. She looked for all the world like a little lost girl. Buffy was annoyed at the urge she had to comfort her and blot the large, juicy teardrops from her cheeks.



Faith looked up at her in bewilderment.



“I’m the Slayer.”



Buffy extended her hand grudgingly and pulled her up off the ground.



“Yeah, well. It seems to be going around these days.”

End Notes:
*** So how'd ya like them apples? Buffy got her beat down in & Cupid & his mama made a guest appearance (and you thought I forgot about them didn't ya?) So much more action, intrigue & juciness to come. New chapter in the next few weeks. XOX Rosie ***
Chapter Forty Seven ~ Don’t Speak by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
**Here come the tears and recriminations as our respective heroes face their exes. You just *knew* Angel wasn't going to let her go that easily...**
“You and me
We used to be together
Everyday together always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real
Well I don't want to know

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts.”

~ No Doubt



It took a bit of convincing but Buffy finally managed to talk Faith into coming back to the warehouse with her. She demanded a few minutes on the phone with Spike (which Buffy was not at all pleased about) but at least she was coming. In return Faith assured her of Dawn's safety and promised to bring the girl back in the morning. The other Slayer was starting to realize just how nasty this year's Apocalypse was going to be. She certainly couldn’t fault the logic - Dawn would be much safer with the whole crew watching her back. She might not trust Buffy, but she seemed just fine with Angel.

Typical.

Buffy thought with an irritated eye roll. At least she knew Dawn was okay now. She’d chastised Faith immediately for leaving her (their?) sister alone. Faith argued that Dawn was a big girl at 15 and more than capable of looking after herself. Apparently life as Faith’s sister was vastly different. Dawn had grown up tough and independent - Buffy was shocked to learn she’d even been combat trained.

“She’s no Slayer, but you bet she can kick some ass.” Faith said proudly. “Can’t leave my little sis all helpless damsel, right?”

“Right.” Buffy replied weakly.

“Hell, if mom was still alive I probably woulda trained her too. It’s not like we can keep ‘em out of danger.” She commiserated, taking no notice of the stricken look on Buffy’s face. “We’re fuckin’ Slayers. It always finds us.”

How had she never thought of that? It hadn’t occurred to her she’d done her family a disservice by leaving them in the dark. All this time she thought she’d been protecting them by keeping them away from her life as a Slayer.

Faith was also quick to point out that Glory didn’t know Dawn was the Key and she was safely squirreled away in a secret location outside Sunnydale.

“No one else knows where she is but me, I swear. I’d never leave her in danger, B. Trust me. She’s all I got.”

Buffy nodded, beginning to believe her. She was also starting to see this Faith for the first time. Was it possible that she was actually as different as Spike said? Certainly seemed more put together than the train wreck she was used to. She still couldn’t bring herself to trust her though. There was just too much bad blood - and a little sister now - between them.

On the walk back Buffy kept the conversation to the business at hand. It was easier to stay in professional slay-mode while she was sorting out her feelings. Not forty-five minutes ago she was ready to fight this girl to the death. Now they were walking home together like the good ‘ol high school days - not that she and Faith were pals now. There weren’t gonna be any PJ parties and pedicures anytime soon.

So she kept it simple, sharing details about Glory, Cordelia's vision and "the plan" (such as it was). But she steered clear of any talk of her own possible demise. She wasn't ready to deal with that herself, and frankly, she still didn't trust Faith as far as she could throw her.

Granted, I just found out that was pretty far...

The thought made her snicker under her breath. This may not be the crazy Faith she used to know...but she still kinda hated her. It was only a matter of months since Faith had been careening around in her body wreaking havoc.

Old habits die hard, what can I say?

Plus that phone call was bothering her. Faith had insisted on talking to Spike, he was the only one she still really trusted. Buffy overheard the whole thing - given that Spike was her boyfriend she felt fully entitled to eavesdrop. He promised Faith that they would talk, that she was safe, that everything would be alright. Buffy found she really didn't like him making promises to other girls, especially his ex, most especially her possibly former archenemy. On the upside though, after today she was pretty sure she could take her out if she needed to.

Bonus!

She grinned cheerfully to herself as they headed back to town.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike was dreading this particular reunion. After their awkward break up he was hoping he’d never have to actually see Faith again. He thought he'd be off on some romantic getaway with Buffy, not parked in a warehouse on East Elm making battle plans with his ex. But that was life on the Hellmouth for you - 'specially if you were a White Hat. He wondered idly if it was too late to trade his in for a jet black Stetson of the 10 gallon variety.

Just call me Billy the Kid.

He sighed. It was well past time for any such thing, Buffy had changed his colors long ago. He’d wanted to somehow be worthy of her, though Lord knows he never would be. He’d given up his last shred of hope when she’d gotten engaged to Finn. He’d let all Angel’s talk of a normal life convince him she was better off, that she’d be happier retired and living her life with a human mate. Little did he know he might yet have a chance with her, or that she might come to find him. Spike goggled at the strange machinations of this Universe and the Powers that controlled it. But if it took bringing Buffy to another world to make her see him true, than so be it.

Cheers to ya, ya bastards! May she never leave my side.

He toasted the night with a nip from his flask, damn glad he was clever enough to stash supplies all about town. That was coming in mighty handy just lately. Though he’d be out within the week the way things were going... His thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of the two Slayers through the side door. Faith looked quite a bit worse for wear. She sported a swollen lip and a gash down her left cheek, the front of her shirt was shredded and her clothes were spotted with dirt. When Fred took her by the arm and led her away for some first aid he went straight to Buffy’s side. He was relieved to see her relatively unharmed. Other than a bruise or two and a cut on her lower lip she seemed fine. He squeezed her tight, grateful.

"You all right, Love?" He inspected her carefully. "I was a bit worried. The thought of Faith with a vendetta..."

"I'm fine.” She dismissed easily. “It was her that shoulda been worried." She jerked her thumb over her shoulder at the other Slayer. He grinned.

"Should’ve known she'd be no match for my girl."

"Yeah, you shoulda!" She poked him in the belly. "Guess you'll just have to get used to dating the baddest ass in town." She sassed at him.

He laughed and gathered her to him.

"And you'll just have to get used to having your man worry about you."

"My man, huh?" Buffy grinned up at him. "I like the sound of that."

A look back to the crowd revealed Faith; patched up and scanning the room. Unfortunately Spike had a good idea of who she was looking for.

"Guess I'd better have that talk." He huffed out a sigh. Buffy smiled gently.

"As much as I don't want you too...I think you should." She looked over at her former rival, now looking lost and alone. “Put it to rest, Spike. Then we can all move on.”

He could see the wisdom in that as reluctant as he was to do it. Buffy saw his look of dread and gave him a small, conciliatory kiss.

“I just want to put this behind us.” She patted his chest. “You two have history together. Recent history. And as much as I want to erase every single second she had her hands on you, I can’t.” She scowled. “It really pisses me off.”

"Ha!” He smirked, just a touch bitterly. “As if I don't feel that way 'bout Peaches. Can't stand the thought that he ever so much as kissed you...but he did." He admitted. "You loved him. He was yours."

"No." she replied softly. "He was never really mine. He was like this dream I had...this perfect romance." She looked at Angel brooding away in the corner, remembering. "He'd sweep in, trench coat flying and rescue me, we'd steal a moment together - maybe even a few perfect days. Sometimes it was great, but mostly... he just made me sad.” She frowned. “He never let me into his life and he never really became a part of mine. He was too busy playing hero and doing what was best for me." She looked up at him. "I think he really loved me. But he never belonged to me. And really... I never belonged to him.” She paused, looking thoughtful. “What about you?” she asked tentatively, just a little bit afraid of his answer. "Was she yours? Even for a little while?"

"No.” His response was instant. “She was never mine, Buffy. No one was ever mine but you."

Spike took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. She smiled up at him. He smiled back, lip trembling just a bit.

He was terribly relieved. His worst fear had been that Buffy would never love him as much as she loved Angel. That nothing could compare to her perfect first love. Come to find out, it wasn't so perfect after all.

He kissed the top of her head, followed by her hands held in his. Not trusting himself to say much more, he nodded and excused himself to have the hard talk with Faith.

He wasn't looking forward to it, but at least his heart was a little lighter knowing Buffy loved him best.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel watched Spike fawn all over Buffy from across the room. It made him ill. How could everyone just gloss over the fact that Spike was so far beneath her? It should be obvious to anyone with half an eye that he wasn’t remotely in her league. God, if she could only see the Spike he knew; the whelpling dropped upon his doorstep, knowing nothing, and yet still an arrogant, cocky little shite. And just because Spike's sneak attack worked this time, didn't mean he couldn't kick his ass. If Cordelia hadn't come out to the alley when she did Angel would've dragged him back outside and beaten that snotty wee pup into the ground. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d had to teach the boy his place.

But she called him "Tired." Made him sound pathetic, like Buffy didn't love him back. As if it weren't mutual, hadn't always been mutual....they'd loved each other for years. It was real, it was epic...it's what all the damn books were written about, wasn't it?

Angel had done his duty, he'd left for her own good. Pushed her toward the normal life she deserved. And he had been content enough knowing she was living that life. But now she'd left Finn and was on the rebound with another vamp. Angel couldn't help but think it was only because he hadn't been available. If she'd have known he was there for her, he had no doubt it'd be his bed she'd be sharing. It irritated him to no end that she'd been sharing Spike's instead. It was a mistake he intended to correct.

There were insinuations in the Watcher's diaries, tales of Slayers drawn to vampires for more than just the kill. Some scholars had even gone so far as to speculate that only a vampire could satisfy a Slayer, that her innate darkness was drawn to his own. Buffy was young, inexperienced - she didn't realize what she needed, that Spike was only a shadow compared to Angel and what he could offer her. They hadn’t been dating long, that much was obvious. He just needed to get her alone for a few minutes.

If he could talk to her, hold her, kiss her just once - he knew she'd be his again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith watched Spike cross the room towards her and took a breath. There was something inside her that needed to hear it, from him. It was one thing for Buffy to say it was over and spin her a yarn about destiny and bullshit. But it was another to hear it from Spike. Maybe it was the masochist in her, needing that final kick in the face. Or maybe it was that closure shit everyone talks about. Either way, she wasn’t going to be satisfied until they had words.

In spite of everything, she still wanted him to know that she really did care about him. Maybe even loved him. She was too much of a realist and a pessimist to believe that it would make any real difference, but still it had to be said. And she was no coward. Dumb, maybe – she could cop to that. Her decisions weren’t always the best. But she wasn’t chickenshit.

She had courage enough to speak her piece, and strength enough to stand there and take it while he spoke his. After all, it wasn’t the worst thing she’d ever been through. Not even close, actually. And if this Apocalypse was anywhere near the predictions it might not even be the worst thing she lived through this year.

She hoped.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike squared his shoulders and approached the other Slayer. She looked tired and troubled in a way he’d never seen before. It made him sad for her and feel all the more tentative with the girl.

Funny that, he’d always seen her as such a bad ass. He’d watched her dust a thousand vamps without batting an eye. She was one of the toughest women he’d ever known. She’d fucked him, fought with him and even made him laugh – but he never heard a tender word from her, and never thought to.

But now it seemed the tender words were to be his, or at least kind ones, with care for her heart and feelings. He’d have to call on his inner William, loathe as he was to admit that ponce existed in any part of him. He sighed.

Only William would know the best way to let down a lady.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy was picking over the food table, starving after her fight with Faith. She was always ravenous after battle - and she’d been doing a lot of that the past few days, hadn’t she? She caught movement from the corner of her eye and turned to see Angel approaching her, a look of pure determination on his face.

Uh oh.

No good had ever come from that look. That was the look he’d had when he told her he couldn’t go to prom. It was the look he had when he told her he was leaving town. All for her own good. What new and condescendingly paternal gesture could he have in mind now?

Ugh.

“Buffy? Could we go outside for a minute? I need to speak with you.”

“I suppose...” she said reluctantly.

Angel pushed open the warehouse door and held it for her.

“Thanks.” She trotted down the steps and sat on the concrete stoop across the alleyway. She took a deep breath.

Might as well get this over with.

“So what’s up?”

He turned to her, all seriousness.

“I need to talk to you about Spike.”

Of course. I should’ve known.

She crossed her arms.

“So talk.”

“You don’t know him like I do...” He began.

“I’d say I know him better actually.”

“You only think you do.” He corrected gently. “You only know what he wants you to know, Buffy. He’s a master manipulator - a killer, he takes pleasure in it.”

“Oh? Like Angelus?” She wasn’t about to mince words here.

He grimaced at that, but continued on.

“Yes.” He admitted. “Probably worse. He doesn’t have a soul to control those impulses. Nothing to reign him in-”

“Maybe he doesn’t need one.” She cut him off. She was already tired of this conversation.

“You don’t know him, Buffy - you haven’t seen the things I’ve seen.”

“I think it’s you that doesn’t know him.” She shot back. “You haven’t seen the good I’ve seen.”

“You’re not hearing me!” he burst out, frustrated at the turn the conversation was taking. Why was she being so damned unreasonable?

“Oh I think I am.” she replied coldly. “And let me stop you before you go too far and say something we both regret.”

“But, Buffy - you don’t understand.” He looked at her helplessly. “I only want what’s best for you.”

That did it. First Giles and her friends and now her ex-boyfriend?

I don’t think so.

She was done being told how to act and how to feel. She stood up to yell at him, temper on full boil.

“I am beyond tired of being told what’s best for me! As if you all know better than I do what I need!”

“But I do know what you need, Buffy.” His eyes were all sincerity. “It’s not that I know better than you - I just know some things you don’t.” He put his hands on her arms, gently soothing. “I know Spike.”

“Well obviously you don’t.” She broke free, turning away. “You’re stuck on some idea of him from your past with no clue about who he is now.”

He was losing his patience. He had to make her see.
“He doesn’t have a soul, Buffy! How can he love you without a soul?!” He pointed agitatedly at the other vampire.

“I don’t know.” She replied calmly. “But he does. More than anyone else ever has. Maybe we just don’t know enough about souls; how they work, how they interact with the demon.” She gazed at her love, standing across the room inside. “Or maybe Spike is just special.”

Angel was quickly moving past frustration into anger. She was an impenetrable wall, all stubborn refusal. “He barely knows you! And he can’t possibly love you as much as I do!” He took a calming breath, softening his voice. “I’ve loved you for so long, Buffy. Don’t you know that? I’ve never stopped loving you. And I know you still care for me. You’ve only been dating him a short while, can you honestly tell me your feelings for him have just erased your love for me?”

“Well, no but-”

He drew closer, taking her hands in his. “If you could just open your heart to me, just the tiniest bit I know you would feel that love again.”

He moved to kiss her then, knowing if she would just allow him that, she would feel all that lay between them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So.” Spike started reluctantly, hands shoved deep in his pockets. God this was uncomfortable. What could he possibly say to the girl?

“So...” Faith felt awkward and out of place, not something she was used to. Her tongue felt numb. This was not going well - not that she expected it to.

“Faith- I...I’m sorry.” He finally managed.

“Thanks, I guess.”

His brow furrowed.

“I mean I never meant to hurt you. I didn’t think I would...not really. You never said anything...we had fun.” he finished lamely.

“Yeah. Fun.” She looked away, arms crossed over her stomach defensively.

The silence was crushing and seem to spin out forever while he desperately scrabbled for the right words.

“Did you ever...care?” she finally ventured.

“Of course I did. You’re a good girl, Faith. A good friend. I’ll always care about you and Dawn.”

She dug further, poking at the wound with a vicious need to hear him say it.

“But you didn’t love me.” It was a bald statement of fact.

“I didn’t think you loved me either, Faith.” he replied gently.

“Yeah well....I did.” It was the most sentiment he’d ever heard from her.

“I didn’t know.”

“Well, now ya do.” She lit up a cigarette.

He didn’t know what to say. He automatically checked for Buffy in the crowd, even her presence was comforting. He saw her talking with Angel and frowned as they went outside. Faith caught the look and sighed.

“Don’t sweat it, bleach boy.” She dismissed with a wave of her hand. “I know you don’t feel the same. It’s written all over you every time you look at her.”

“I’m sorry.” he repeated dumbly. What else was there?

“Tell me something, and do me a favor and don’t lie to me,” She pointed her cigarette at him. “Did you leave me because of her?”

“No.” She eyed him dubiously. “I swear it. This just happened. And you may not want to hear it but I really was planning on leaving town, well before I ever met up with her. I wasn’t happy, Faith.” She looked hurt at that. “I’m not blaming you.” He rushed to explain. “It was just my life...it wasn’t what I wanted. So I was plannin’ on leaving Sunnydale, goin’ back to London like I said.”

“Without me.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yes.” His voice was quiet. “Maybe I’m a prick for leading you on, for not wanting more. I didn’t mean to play with your feelings, Faith. I just thought you-”

“Didn’t have any?” She supplied. He winced at that.

“Not quite that, but close.”

“I guess that’s my fault then. I never told ya.”

“Call it a draw?” he asked with the faintest hope.

“I don’t think so. I’m puttin’ this one on you.” She pointed at him. “But... maybe we can be friends again... Sometime. When I don’t hate your undead ass so much.” But she said it without anger.

He looked relieved and smiled broadly. Faith cocked an eyebrow at him.

“Don’t get excited, Blondie.” She dismissed with a puff of smoke.

“I said maybe.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy kept her hand against his chest, holding Angel firmly away from her.

“What are you doing?”

“If you would let me kiss you just once-” She pushed him away in disgust.

“Just what is it you think is going to happen here? That you’ll kiss me and we’ll just fall in love again? That I’ll forget all about Spike and then run away with you?” She looked at him squarely, sizing him up. “You do, don’t you? I can see it on your face. You think I’m just being naive.” Her voice took on a mocking edge. “Oh yes, Angel please show me the error of my ways.” She pointed an accusatory finger at him. “You know you remind me of Riley right now. Neither of you ever trusted my judgement or my decisions. And what is that?” She threw her arms up in frustration. “I’m the one girl in all the world chosen to fight evil but I don’t have sense enough to pick my own boyfriend?!”

Angel’s voice was gentle as he drew closer. He didn’t want to upset her. He was trying to save her from pain. God knows Spike would only disappoint her.

“You just don’t know him. He can’t possibly make you happy, Buffy. I’m sorry, but he can’t. It just isn’t in him.” She scoffed and turned to face him.

“And you can?”

“Yes.” He said earnestly.

“And just what have you ever done to make me happy, Angel?” She couldn’t contain her bitterness, “Was it to turn on my friends and terrorize them? Or maybe it was to randomly pop by to judge me and my life choices once a year? Oh wait, I know; maybe it was when you left when I needed you most?!”

“I wanted you to have a normal life!” He threw up his own hands, exasperated. “I left for your own good!”

“And look how well that turned out.” She said sarcastically, hand on hip. “Here I am in another goddamned dimension, fighting a Hell god who will probably kill me and sharing my little sister with an escapee from the Sunnydale psych ward. Just awesome.”

“But I only-”

She ignored him.“Did it ever occur to you that this is real? That I might actually be in love with him?” She turned to look him in the eye. “Spike has never left my side. No matter what I’ve done he’s stayed and he’s loved me, all this time. You may think that what you did was for my own good. That leaving me was the right and noble thing to do. But that’s the difference between you and him. You can walk away. And Spike never will. He’d give up his life first. And the way he makes me feel I’d do the same.” She stopped and took a breath. She wanted him to hear this. “This isn’t a phase, Angel. Spike isn’t my rebound guy. He’s the one.”

Angel stared at her open mouthed. What was she saying?!

“Whatever life I have left to me, I want him. On the field or off, he’s my partner. You are my friend, Angel. I respect you and I will always care about you. But there is no one else I want by my side but Spike. Understand?”

“But Buffy?!-”

“No one.” She pressed firmly. “And if you push this you will lose me even as a friend. It’s not what I want, but right now if you’re not for me, you’re against me. I can’t have anyone undermining my team. I have too many enemies already.”

“I could never be your enemy, Buffy.” His voice was choked with feeling. Could he be really losing her? After everything? “You know I love you.”

“Yes.” She replied simply. “And I loved you. You were my first everything, Angel.” She looked him in the eyes. “But I was 16 then, in high school.” Her voice was kind, but firm. He had to get this.“Don’t you think it’s time we both moved on?”

She touched his face gently in goodbye and left him standing alone in the doorway.

End Notes:
**All the TALKING, oy! It's enough to make a girl long for the good ol' days of the last Apocalypse. Don't worry, kiddies we're back to the plot twisties & smut in the next 2 chapters. Mama knows what you like ;) Thank you from the bottom of my naughty little heart for staying with me. Love, love, love, Miss Rosie xxo***
Chapter Forty ~ Eight - How Can You Mend a Broken Heart? by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Forty ~ Eight - How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?

“How can you mend a broken heart?
How can you stop the rain from falling down?
How can you stop the sun from shining?
What makes the world go round?

How can you mend this broken man?
How can a loser ever win?
Please help me mend my broken heart
And let me live again.”

~ Al Green


Buffy was glad to see Spike had finished up with Faith and was on his own again. She wanted to be alone with him more than anything right now, far away from ex-lovers and their stupid demands. He was standing idly by the makeshift table, munching his way through what remained of the food. Yet another Spike quirk; he ate. She’d never seen Angel do more than have a glass of wine but Spike had been known to put away 2 orders of spicy buffalo wings, half a dozen beers and an entire blooming onion in a single sitting. He seemed to love life and was enamoured with everything about it; food, music, literature. For a vampire he certainly knew how to live.

She crept up behind him and slipped her arms around his waist. He turned into her embrace with a smile.

“There you are, Love.”

“So how’d it go?” she asked casually.

She was hoping to gloss right over the talk she’d just had with Angel. She was not emotionally prepared for more shows of manly violence today. Between Riley, Spike and Angel Buffy was thoroughly exhausted. Faith was just the cherry on top. All she wanted now was a hot bath and a night in Spike’s arms.

“Not quite as painful as I expected, but still uncomfortable as hell.” He replied, rubbing the back of his neck with a rueful smile.“And you?” He asked evenly. “Saw Captain Forehead drag you outside. Didn’t look like a strategy meeting.”

Crap.

“It wasn’t.” She admitted.

“Do I need to stake him and kick the ashes or did you straighten him out?” He lit up a cigarette.

“You weren’t worried?” she was surprised. He and Angel always had a rivalry - especially where she was concerned.

“I hoped I had no reason to be.”

“You didn’t.” Buffy smiled with relief.

“So you weren’t tempted to let him take you away from all this then?” He gestured with a circular wave of his smoke and a small smile, leaning comfortably against the table.

“Ha.” she scoffed. “Not quite. I’ve learned from experience; you can’t revisit the past. And that wasn’t a past I wanted on repeat.”

“Does that make me the future then?” He gave her a cocky, sideways smirk.

“That makes you my past, present and future.” She moved closer, sliding her arms around his neck.

“So you’re sayin’ I’m your everything?” he bent down to kiss her.

“Looks like.” She kissed him back.

His face split into an enormous grin.

“I can live with that.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith pushed the remains of her burger and fries away. The sight of Spike and Buffy in each other’s arms made her stomach ache. She wasn’t ready to accept this yet, and who could blame her? Too much had happened in such a short time. It irked her that everyone seemed to instantly accept them as a couple. What about the last six months? Didn’t it mean anything that she was with Spike that whole time?

More than anything it burned her to be so easily pushed aside, once again left - dropped like she didn’t matter. Those six months certainly mattered to her. It was the first time she felt like a real family with Dawn since ever. And he was so good with her, you could see that he genuinely loved the kid. He treated her like she was his own little sis. Her head hurt. It was all so fucking confusing! She struggled with it but she couldn’t get a straight line on the truth yet, she'd held out the ghost of a hope that revealing her feelings would make some kind of difference. But it didn't. It just put him in the awkward position of saying he didn't love her back. And then he dropped that deadly F-word: friends. He swore he cared about her but he wanted to go off on his own anyway. He promised it was never about Buffy and that they were a new thing. Faith didn’t want to believe him... but Spike had never lied to her. He never said he loved her, never said it was forever - she just wanted it to be.

Faith wanted the snug little family unit they had with Dawn as badly as she ever wanted anything in her life. A part of her wondered if it would have made any difference if she’d told him sooner. Would he have left her then? Would he have ended up with Buffy anyway? And was it Spike she loved or just the family they made with Dawn? Add an hour long debriefing from Wesley to those brain teasers and her head was just spinning. Buffy's dad was supposed to be her dad? Dawn was part of both Slayers? Buffy was from another fucking dimension? She had to snort at that one.

I coulda told you guys that awhile ago.

She chuckled at her own joke. But the Buffy from here was where now? Ugh. No wonder she had a headache. About the only concept she could really get behind was Apocalypse now. That she knew how to deal with.

Finally, just gimme somethin’ I can fight!

She was itching for a stake in her hand. All this tension for days with no release - no slaying, no fucking, no nothing. She was starting to go a little crazy. It had been weeks since Spike had really touched her. And their sex life slowed to a crawl months ago. Apparently that wasn’t a problem he had with Buffy, she’d seen that with her own eyes. An unwanted flash of the two of them in the graveyard hit her hard. She shoved her hurt away and turned her back on the cheery scene. Spike had his arm casually slung around Buffy, like she belonged to him. Faith couldn’t remember a time when she felt that way. She’d never belonged to anyone, never had the feeling of being one half of a whole.

It hurt her to see him with another girl so soon. Was she that easy to get over? It hurt even more that the girl was Buffy of all people. Tears pricked at the back of her eyes, but she swallowed them back. She had her suspicions that Spike loved the other Slayer all along. And it seemed unfair as hell that Buffy should end up with one more thing after all she was blessed with, especially when it was something Faith wanted so much... though right now Spike was starting to feel like just another guy who left and let her down.

“Ugh!” she growled.

It was time for a smoke and a break from her brain. If she didn’t watch herself she’d end up a bitter old drunk like Lydia. She watched her mother turn herself inside out with whiskey and disappointment, wasting her youth and beauty along the way. She gave herself liver cancer in the end and died before she even saw 40. Faith learned it was best not to hold on to pain too tightly, it ended up devouring you. She patted her jacket pocket checking for the pack of Lucky Strikes she always carried. They never failed her, thank God.

She had a feeling her chain smoking days were just beginning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel couldn't quite process the things Buffy had said to him tonight. How could it end like this? Years ago he’d watched her being Chosen and had fallen for her body and soul. She was so beautiful and so brave, staying strong through every test and trial. She made him want to be a better man and inspired him to become the hero he was. She was the most amazing woman he had ever known.

Even in the darkest times he kept the faith and believed that somehow, someday they'd end up together. It felt like fate, like destiny. It hurt that they had to be apart but his love for her remained constant; she was his touchstone and always at the center of his heart. All these years he believed they had the perfect love, something real and pure that would last forever. But Buffy didn't seem to feel the same and Angel wasn't dealing well with having all of his illusions shattered.

If it was only an illusion it was one of his most cherished. It gave him something worth fighting for. But what now? If he wasn't Buffy's hero, then who was he? And if he wasn't fighting for a future with her then what the hell was he fighting for? For all his bravado and stirring speeches it couldn’t be solely for redemption. Even Angel couldn’t sustain himself on the act of atonement alone.

It seemed impossible that she could be choosing Spike. It was insane. How could she believe Spike was better for her than he was?! At least Riley had been human. He was a fighter like himself and seemed to be on the right side of things. Though he was definitely questioning that evaluation after today. But with Spike you never knew. He changed sides when it suited him, played teams against each other, manipulated everyone and above all always looked out for number one. He might say he was a good guy today but tomorrow could just as easily find him playing villain. Why couldn't Buffy see that?!

Angel sat down heavily on the concrete stoop. He hadn’t gone inside again. That room seemed too warm, too bright, too full of people he had no interest in talking to. He couldn't just leave but he didn't want to be here anymore. So he stayed outside in the welcoming cool of the evening, grateful for the solitude and quiet. It had been an hour now and he still had no desire to go in.

It was starting to sink in that he’d truly lost her. It struck him suddenly just how forlorn he felt, the lonesome feeling seemed to creep into his bones. Losing Buffy, even if it was only the illusion of her, made him feel more truly alone than he had in years. There was no one to share his future with...

So what am I fighting for?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t until Faith stepped into the shadows that she saw Angel, sitting on the cement steps of the warehouse across the alley. He was parked at the bottom step, back against the rail, glowering resentfully at the bright picture inside. At least she wasn’t alone, Angel looked even more miserable than she was. She always suspected he carried a torch for Buffy - engagement or no. Now she could see it written all over him, poor bastard. She knew just how he felt.

“Mind if I smoke?”

He shook his head but said nothing. She leaned companionably against the rail and lit her cigarette.
They sat in silence, neither at all pleased with their present condition. Standing outside the doorway they watched Spike and Buffy surrounded by chattering friends, hands linked. The situation was all too familiar to both of them; once again on the outside looking in.

“Will ya look at that?” Faith puffed an irritable cloud of smoke. “Might as well be a goddamned engagement party.”

Angel snorted.

“Like it means anything.” He retorted.

“Like it’ll last.” Faith’s mouth curled up at one corner, and she turned to face him. “You sure we can’t beat on ‘em until they come to their senses?” And then her smirk hit full on.

“No.” Angel’s smirk matched her own. He surprised her by grabbing the cigarette from her hand & taking a long, slow pull.

“Look who’s all bad ass now.”

He shrugged, standing up to pace the alley.

“Used to be.”

She turned toward him, really looking him over for the first time.

“Oh, I dunno…” She leaned in flirtily, grabbing her cigarette back. “I think you’ve still got a little bad boy in ya.”

“Yeah?” He found himself smiling.

She knew she was flirting. She wasn’t even trying. But why not? Misery loved company. Faith thought she could just do with a little company right now. He had a vibe, this guy. All darkness and power barely held in check. Like if she undid his latches right the tiger might come out of the cage. He intrigued her. The bad boys always did. Faith gave him her sauciest smile and tossed her long, dark hair off her shoulder.

“Definitely.”

Angel couldn’t help but smile back. He liked this girl, always had. There was something about her swagger even in the face of her misery and Gods bless her for making him smile in the midst of his own. She made him feel reckless and cocky at the same time. He found he liked it.

He reached for her cigarette again, this time she touched his hand when she passed it over. He was shocked by her heat. He’d forgotten how warm Slayers were, as if their metabolism was perpetually set on full burn. Buffy had kept him at arms length tonight, nowhere near her warmth. He pushed the painful memory away, focusing instead on the feisty presence in front of him.

“Want your own?” She quirked an eyebrow at him.

“Rather share.”

“Would you now?” It was more a suggestive statement than a question.

He found he liked the suggestion and took a step closer. Why not? There was nothing left to lose.

“Yeah.”

When she stepped closer still and reached for the remaining stub of cigarette, he acted on impulse and pulled her in sharply. His old instincts were kicking in again, the ones he used to follow without question. They told him this was a girl he could get lost in, a girl he could forget everything with for awhile. That was exactly what he wanted.

Angel was surprised when she was the one to kiss him.
Chapter Forty Nine ~ I'm on Fire by Soul of the Rose
Author's Notes:
Lovely banner by the talented Kargrif


**A Little late Christmas present from me to you. Enjoy Faith & Angel sexy time, Ooooh! And as always, this could not have been done without the loving assistance of my awesome beta Miss Jill who shares my obsession & enthusiasm for BTVS & Spuffy. xox**
Chapter Forty ~ Nine - I'm On Fire

"Hey little girl is your daddy home
Did he go ‘way and leave you all alone?
Uh huh, I got a bad desire....
Ohhhh, I'm on fire.
Tell me now baby is he good to you
Can he do to you the things that I do?
Uh huh, I can take you higher.
Ohhhh, I'm on fire."

- Bruce Springsteen


He’d heard about things like this; thunderbolts and first touches. He’d just thought it was bullshit. Even Buffy had been a warm, mellow buzz – sweet and tender, something to savor, something to cherish. But Faith…first contact shocked him to the bone. The visceral animal heat of her, the alchemical explosion he felt at her kiss.

She bit his lip and he growled. Faith growled back and licked his neck, leaving a wet and smoldering trail he felt all the way to his groin.

Fuck.

Angel was more aroused than he’d been in years. Without thought he slammed her up against the alley wall, her legs wrapped automatically around his waist and he was burned again. She was already wet for him – he could smell it. The sweet tang of Slayer musk perfumed the night air. It was all he could do not to free his suddenly raging erection and simply have her. But they were only behind the open door, easily within ear shot of half a dozen people. That simply would not do, he had plans for this girl - there was gonna be noise.

Faith seemed to guess what he was thinking;

“Don’t care if they hear.” She panted.

“I do.” He growled. “Don’t want to share this.” He ground hard into her sweet spot and was rewarded with a moan. “Want you all to myself.”

His words hit her deep. No one had ever said such a thing to her.

Fuck.

“Let’s go.” She commanded. “Now.”

Angel kissed her hard and set her on her feet. She grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the alley.

“Where?” She questioned, breathless.

He grinned back at her. “I know just the place…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was hard not to take her right there on the hood of his car. Harder still not to fuck her in the car, when she was raking his thighs with her nails, biting his neck and talking dirty in his ear the entire ride there. When she squeezed his cock through his jeans he nearly crashed.

Ten minutes had never seemed this long before. As soon as he pulled into the wide brick drive she was on him. Straddling his lap her tongue was everywhere; entwined with his, all over his neck and collar bone, tickling the shell of his ear.

With a frustrated growl Angel pushed open the door and managed to maneuver both of them out of the Plymouth, Faith still wrapped around him. The hood was starting to look appealing again…but they were 6 feet from the front gates.

“Wait, Faith…baby…” He managed to disengage her long enough to get to the wrought iron door. “We’re here.”

Once he set her on her feet she actually bothered to look around. “Whoa.”

Angel located his old key and opened the heavy gates leading to the house. She stepped through the elaborately worked iron door and goggled at the stylish Art Deco facade of the enormous mansion.

“Nice place you got here.”

Angel smiled at the compliment, still feeling a certain pride for the beautiful building he helped to restore.

“It was home once.”

He showed her through the heavy, square door into the front room, relieved to see no one else had set up shop since he’d been away.

Angel went to the fireplace first, rummaging for usable wood and was pleased to find a few logs left. While Faith roamed the cavernous rooms he set the scene; lighting the fire and the few stubs of candles that were left. He shook the rug out and laid it with pillows and blankets from the linen closet. All was as he’d left it; he guessed his reputation for violent retribution kept other demons from his lair.

Faith wandered back into the front room and smiled at the romantic picture before her; roaring fire, cozy blankets & luxurious pillows, candles flickering on the mantle. Another first for her, she was touched.

“You sure know how to treat a gal.” she said, meaning it.

“I do what I can.” Angel returned her warm smile and gestured for her to join him on the blankets.

“You do a lot.” She replied and crawled toward him to kiss him soundly.

Again he felt that electricity zipping through his veins at her kiss. It was so good to feel something. He had grown accustomed to ever-present emptiness and regret, this was something new. He pulled her into his lap enjoying her warmth. She was so alive, so brash and in-the-moment. It was different with Buffy. Buffy was the light to his darkness, with her he’d found the only real happiness he’d had in centuries.

This wasn’t happiness. Happiness wasn’t on the menu tonight…but something. Something akin to satisfaction, to warmth and connection. He would take that, and in return give her all he could. Faith had been hurt like him, left and neglected. Maybe he could give her a little bit back, something to ease that hollow ache he knew so well.

He was hard again, just from a kiss. When was the last time that happened? He rolled her to the ground and let himself be for once. He wasn’t going to analyze this or over think it, it felt too good. Something about her made him feel playful, passionate. They made out like high schoolers and he thoroughly enjoyed himself; groping and grinding through clothes, limbs and tongues tangled.

When he couldn’t take another minute, he laid her out in front of the fire like a true romantic hero. Slowly and gently he stripped off her clothes enjoying each new exposure of her satiny olive skin. When she was fully nude he looked at her for a long while, not saying anything. Faith began to squirm under his scrutiny.

“What?”

“You’re beautiful..”

She thought she might cry, so she yanked him down to kiss her before she broke like a big baby, focusing on the moment instead. There was something so hot about being totally naked while he was still clothed. She liked his big body over hers and rubbed herself against him, the texture of his shirt and jeans tingly to her flesh. Finally he broke the kiss and sat up long enough to peel off his own clothes and admire the view. Her hair was a wild tangle of curls and her lips were swollen from kissing. She looked sultry and delicious – a temptress if ever he saw one.

Where Buffy was bright summertime, Faith was all the lushness of fall. Her lips were full and naturally red, her nipples the color of dark berries and when he bent to her sex it was a fig split with ripeness, looking just as succulent and enticing. He leaned in to catch the scent of her and was intoxicated, she was so wet and ready for him, so aroused. It made him all the harder, but he could wait. There were a few things he wanted to do first…

The first lick made her quiver and when his tongue filled her she arched into his mouth with a cry. He scrupulously licked every wet inch of her, sucking and nibbling each juicy bit. When she was drenched and trembling Angel set her on all fours in front of him to tongue the tight rosebud of her ass. He slid two fingers into her saturated slit and was pleased to hear her let loose a long, shuddering whimper. He licked her up and down, around his fingers, flicking her clit then back up to her ass, all the while keeping up the motion of his clever hand. Before long he had her panting.

“Gonna come, baby…oh god…”

Without losing a beat Angel slid himself beneath her and planted her on his face. Faith rode his wriggling tongue to a shattering orgasm and rolled into a multiple when a slick finger found its way into her ass. She sputtered and cursed as she came again, grinding into his face and yanking on his hair.

Angel would never have dared such a thing with Buffy. She had always been so pure and perfect to him, beautiful and fragile as a china cup. He’d sought to protect and preserve her innocence always. But Faith was no innocent; she’d seen this world and all its ugliness. She’d been to Hell and back again – just like him. Somehow he felt they were equals; she’d be able to take whatever he dished out and return it full measure.

After she came the fourth time Faith peeled herself from his mouth and sprawled across his body, leaning in for a languorous kiss. She licked his glistening mouth making him growl and bite the lushness of her lower lip. She returned his bite with a much harder one of her own and found herself instantly flat on her back, pinned underneath a vampire in full game face. He wondered how she would react. Faith grabbed him by the hair and pulled him down to her.

“Kiss me.” She demanded.

He did.

Angel wrapped his textured tongue around hers and flicked his sharpened canines against her lips. Faith wriggled and moaned beneath him, sliding her slick wetness up and down his length. So hot like this, so delicious – each sensation was intensified. He’d never made love to a human in vamp form. Not like this.

“Want that tongue.” She rasped.

“Where?”

“Everywhere.”

He was more than happy to oblige, he wanted to taste every part of her. He flicked his long, cat-tongue over her collar bone, between her breasts and over each sensitized nipple. Faith shuddered and gasped at every cool, wet flicker. He rolled each nipple along his tongue and followed with a sharp nip just hard enough to give a quick, stinging pain. Her head rolled back and she groaned, arching into him.

“Fuck, baby.”

He chuckled into her belly.

“Just wait.”

When he spread her lips and lapped at her pussy, she whimpered helplessly.

“Gonna make you come again, Faith.”

“Yes.”

“Gonna make you come so hard and then I’m going to fill you up with my big, thick cock until you scream.”

His words alone could have given her an orgasm, but that tongue…

Angel filled her with his tongue and felt her start to twitch and shudder. She was so close already. He pulled out to rub the rough texture back and forth slowly over her clit, in seconds she was screaming. No words, just primal grunts.

He serviced her until she pushed his face away. He was unbearably hard. In three seconds he had her spread open and pinned beneath him. In one he was inside, with a single deep thrust. Her eyes were so wide for a moment he thought he actually hurt her. Then her legs moved from his arms to around his neck and she thrust back.

Slayer muscles…damn.

Angel wanted to make this last, but the way she was squeezing him…and it had been so long. He didn’t have much time. He planted his forearms in the plush carpet and went to work.

Faith was split in two, legs wrapped around her lover’s neck and so full. Spike had never let her have him as a vampire. He seemed ashamed of it, like he thought it was dirty or something. Personally it made her hot, but he wouldn’t hear of it. She had no idea it would be like this - that everything changed. He’d never even kissed her that way, so the whole cat-tongue thing was a surprise. But the cock, oh the cock… God, she had never been so full before, so satisfied. And Angel seemed to have stamina for days, he was absolutely drilling her. She wanted to laugh with the joy of it. She felt free finally, like she could give and take everything she wanted to. Like she could be as wild and uninhibited as she wanted to be and this vampire would be right there with her.

About fucking time.

Before he blew his load there were a few things she wanted to do first. With a powerful twist of her hips she flipped their positions. Angel landed with a thud and a comical look of surprise on his face. Faith grinned down at him wickedly.

“My turn.”

She planted her feet on either side of his chest and began to ride him like a prize bull. Leaning back into her palms, her knees spread wide, she offered him a spectacular view; big, beautiful tits bouncing, glistening pink on display. Nothing he liked better than to watch a woman fuck him and Faith was giving him quite a show. When she reached down to play with herself he thought he was going to die of bliss. This girl was pure sin. He reached to fondle her breasts and realized he was still in game face. He drew back not wanting to hurt her with his claws, but Faith pulled his hands to her nipples and rubbed against them.

“Don’t stop. I like it.”

She liked his demon? She wanted it?

“Make it hurt.” She put a clawed finger in her mouth and bit the tip, Slayer muscles squeezing his cock.

Fuck.

He drew his sharpened nail lightly across her lip and down her chin. With both hands he dragged his claws down her chest and over her breasts, contracting around each nipple. He used his thumb nails on her nipples flicking both at once until she squirmed all over his cock, whimpering. Then he dragged them down her abdomen and down her outer flanks, skimming her inner thighs on the way up.

“Yeah, Baby.” she breathed “Like that.”

He repeated the pattern several more times until her body was covered with angry-looking red streaks. Faith cooed and moaned her approval the entire time, pussy twitching and starting to contract around him. She grabbed his hair suddenly and kissed him fiercely.

“Now fuck me. Hard.”

He rolled her to the ground and beneath him in one forceful move. She gasped when she hit the carpet and smiled.

“Oh Daddy, you know I like it rough.” She teased with a smirk.

Damn but this girl was bad.

Perfect.

“You want Daddy to fuck you now?”

He thrust hard, emphasizing his point.

Faith nodded, eyes wide. No one had ever played along before.

“Say it then.”

He slowed his pace, teasing her with shallow, circular strokes.

“Fuck me, Daddy.”

He rewarded her with a deeper thrust, making her gasp.

“Say it again.” He commanded with a low growl. It went straight to her clit with an electric zing.

“Fuck me hard, Daddy!”

Angel lay into her in earnest, her legs tight around his waist, his face buried in her hair.

“Fuck me good, Daddy. Yes, so good…god…” she moaned into his neck, her nasty talk spurring him on.

He gave her everything he had, nailing her to the carpet with each thrust. He could hear the sound of their flesh smacking together and her grunts of pleasure. Each sensation was so potent; her hot, dirty whispers in his ear, the dig of her nails in his back, her scorching wetness surrounding him. He wasn’t sure how much more he could take.

“Gonna come... oh fuck…” She moaned.

“Good girl, come for Daddy.”

Faith howled when she came, but it wasn’t “Daddy” on her lips.

“Angel!…Oh Angel…so good.”

Hearing her wail his name in satisfaction pushed him right over. He spilled into her with a roar, finally collapsing in a messy heap. His perfect hair was thrashed, his cock was actually sore and he was pretty sure his back was in shreds. Somehow he just couldn’t find it in himself to care. Angel couldn’t remember ever feeling this relaxed. He rolled onto his back and pulled her up onto his chest.

Faith let out a deep exhale.

“Wow. You really do know how to treat a lady.”

He chuckled and kissed the top of her head, putting on a bit of Irish brogue;

“Well, I tell ya, Lass; I never was a gentleman but I always loved t’ ladies.”

She planted her chin on his chest and gazed up at him.

“Dollface, anyone who fucks me like that can be anything he wants.”

That made him laugh and he scooped her up to kiss him. He liked this girl more and more. When she slid her silky tongue against his own his cock twitched.

“Think they miss us yet?” She sassed, nibbling at his lower lip.

“Who cares.”

Angel grinned wickedly and set himself to debauching her all over again.




End Notes:
**Was it good for you? I thought we all needed a little release after all the Spuffy UST around here. On a side note I did some research on Angel's mansion & found out it was actually built by Frank Lloyd Wright & can be found in Griffith Park in LA: http://www.ennishouse.org/ There is your factoid of the day :) Much love & Happy Holidays, Rosie**
Chapter 50 by Soul of the Rose
Chapter Fifty ~ Fever

“Never know how much I love you,
Never know how much I care.
When you put your arms around me
I get a fever that's so hard to bear.

You give me fever, when you kiss me.
Fever when you hold me tight.
Fever ... in the mornin',
Fever all through the night

Sun lights up the day time.
Moon lights up the night.
I light up when you call my name.
'cause I know you're gonna treat me right.
You give me fever...”

- Peggy Lee





It was after 1 when Faith and Angel finally returned to the warehouse, sneaking in the way they left. They were hoping to slip in quietly through the back door but very little in life slipped by Cordelia Chase. She turned to face them almost as soon as they were inside, arms folded across her chest disapprovingly.

“And just where have you two been?” She cocked a sharp eyebrow at Angel.

“We went for a drive.” They said in unison. They eyed each other nervously for a split second before Faith’s natural instincts took over. She shrugged nonchalantly and reached for a smoke.

“Can’t blame a girl. What with all the trauma.” She directed that last part to Spike and Buffy who shifted uncomfortably under her gaze.

“’Sides you know how much I hate being penned up. It was startin’ to feel like the Fulsom Inn around here.” She lit up a smoke and exhaled a dramatic puff. “And other than the fact that I look great in black, me n’ Johnny Cash just ain’t got that much in common.”

With that she turned and walked away; ‘nough said.

Angel had to suppress a grin at her little act.

Nice deflection, baby.

Spike watched Angel curiously. Something was up here, he could feel it. Hell, he could almost smell…

Wait a second.

Taking a deeper whiff in Angel’s direction his eyes widened. Peaches got himself shagged!

No bloody way.

But there it was; the unmistakable tang of Slayer musk mixed with the scent of sex and human sweat and just the faintest trace of Faith’s favorite body spray. She was quite the little hellcat. Certainly gave Angel a run for his money, who now that Spike was looking him over seemed worse for wear. His normally impeccable clothes were rumpled, perfect hair flattened and, hey -

Was that a bite on his neck?!

“Yeah.” Angel spoke up. “You know, we just needed to get away. Get some air. Take a little ride.”

He raised an eyebrow at Angel.

A little ride, eh?

Spike was dying to call him out in front of the group, bust his balls a bit but no telling what chaos that might lead to. The way Buffy felt about Faith, not to mention the way Spike was afraid she might still feel about Angel... After all it was one thing to say farewell to your high school sweetheart and quite another to find he was havin’ it off with your sworn enemy not an hour later. Oh yes, best not stir that particular pot.

He could assume the wanker was over Buffy now and on to greener pastures, but one never knew with Angel. The git could hold a grudge for a century or more as he recalled, he never forgot a slight. Foul temper that one - Not that ol’ Spike was worried now. He’d already bested the Poof once today.

Wouldn’t mind another go at that actually….

He replayed the fight in his head, thinking of all the ways he could inflict more damage on the next round. He gleefully imagined grinding Angel’s face into the concrete. Oh, the picturesque way his blood would fly. He sighed. Just beautiful. Maybe he could manage to take out a few teeth, a fang would be-

“What are you smiling at?” Buffy narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously.

“Just happy, Pet.” He covered with a cheerful grin.
She didn’t trust that grin one little bit.

“Uh huh.” She crossed her arms, not at all convinced.

“What?”

“You have Evil Face.”

Spike looked affronted.

“I do not.”

“Do so. You have ‘making sinister plans and up to no good’ written allll over you.” She wriggled an accusatory finger at him.

Spike did his patented tongue curl and gathered her into his arms.

“You love it, Baby. Who’s the Big Bad, eh?”

“I do not.” She scoffed, pulling away.

“Uh huuuh. Bet yer wet right now.” His hand wormed its way inside her pants to find out.

“Spike! Stop it!” She batted at his roving hands. “They’ll see.”

“Not if I take you outside they won’t…” He could see from her face she was considering it, against her better judgement.

“C’mon, Baby.” He purred, wrapping his arms around her and nuzzling her neck from behind. “You know I’ll make it good for you…”

“We don’t have time…” she said, but he knew she was caving. He said nothing but rubbed his erection surreptitiously against her ass.

“But... we have to get Dawn.” It was almost a whimper.

“Let Faith an’ Angel get Dawn. It’ll keep ‘em out of trouble.”

Spike was starting to make sense. That couldn’t be right…

“But, but…responsibilities…” he pulled her back to him, letting her feel how hard he was. “Spiiike…noooooo.”

He grinned evilly to himself. He knew that particular “no” - it inevitably meant “yes”.

“You sure about that, Pet?” He played along for a moment, pulling away from her. “Are you sure you don’t want me to take you outside and lick every square inch of your supple, naked body until you scream in ecstatic bliss?”

She turned around giving him the evil eye. Spike batted his eyelashes innocently.

“That’s fighting dirty!” She poked him hard in the chest. “You know how I feel about your tongue!”

“Yeah.” He gave her a smug grin. “Ain’t it great?”

Buffy laughed and threw her arms around him, smooching on his face until he laughed too.

“See?” She said, settling into his arms.

“What?”

“I knew you had Evil Face.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith watched Angel from across the warehouse floor as he addressed his crew and set them to work. He appeared to be the big bad Daddy in more than just the bedroom which was undeniably hot. She sighed lustfully and studied him for awhile thinking about what a surprise last night was. They went 3 rounds - total K.O. She was deeply satisfied and sore in all the right places. But it was too good to last. As much as she was enjoying whatever this was Angel had LA and his crew to go back to, a life of his own... there was no place in it for her and Dawn.

And she could hardly imagine him saddled with a kid, let alone an erratic teenage girl. However grown-up Dawnie might seem today she could turn on a dime and become a screaming brat tomorrow. Faith had some very vivid memories of tantrums that ended in Dawn shrieking,“Get out, get out, GET OUT!” Followed by a slammed door that shook the whole apartment and a trashed room that looked like a Motley Crue after party, flaming trashcans and all. She shuddered to think how Angel would react - probably with a swift decapitation. Hell, it took all her self-control not to knock her into next week and she loved the little snot.

Yep, this is fuckin’ doomed. Dammit.

She frowned, already missing the all-day shag-a-thons they would never have. It would be better if she said it first, might save herself some pain. God knows she’d had enough of that lately. Still, she couldn’t help but feel grateful. She hadn’t felt that sexy and desired in awhile. Not to mention the nice, comfy distance it put between her and the ex - she could look at Spike today without feeling like dirt. It really was like Mama always said; the best way to get over a man was to get under another one. She wouldn’t mind gettin’ under him again actually.

Under, over, on top of...

She eyed Angel speculatively, thinking about all the things they hadn’t tried yet. It was a damn shame he wore such bulky clothes, he had a smokin’ bod under that trench coat. Speaking of things she’d like to get under again...she bit her lower lip. Faith always ran hot blooded, but something about Angel had her hormones in overdrive. Their chemistry was wicked, he never held back with her and his kinks scratched hers in all the right places. Maybe next time they could get out the handcuffs...

She let out a heavy sigh. Best cut that train of thought off right now. There might not be a next time, and if there was there probably wouldn’t be much more to it than that. After the big battle everyone would go their separate ways and she’d be on her own again, just like she always was. But at least she had Dawn. She took comfort in that and all it meant to her. Having family was no small thing to Faith, and Dawn was all she had left now. Strange to think the monks had nearly given her a half sister in Buffy.

Wouldn’t that have been somethin’ though? Slayer Sisters? Hell, we could start a band!

That made her smile. How different would her life have been if she’d had Joyce and Buffy in it? If she’d had a half-decent father instead of a parade of dirt bag “uncles”? Though from what little she’d heard Hank Summers was no prize either. Would he have left all of them? Or was it easier to walk away with only one child to abandon? She felt a momentary pang for Buffy. She knew the pain of being left too well. The only thing that saved her was having Dawn to care for. Buffy had her mom, but it wasn’t the same. She knew that too. Her own mother had never been able to completely fill the void her father left. Maybe they had more in common than just being Chosen... and how crazy was that? She would have sworn they were as different as night and day if you would have asked her a few days ago.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Angel’s approach. She smiled up at him before she could stop herself and covered it quickly with a brisk;

“What’s up, Boss?”

“Thought it was about time to go pick up Dawn. Wanted to get her before sunrise so we can use my car.”

She was rattled by his generosity, not to mention his nearness. He didn’t have to drive her anywhere, didn’t have to offer his help but there he was making things easier. And his proximity was making her body react in all the wrong ways. She managed to stumble out “Okay... cool.” before grabbing her jacket and following him to the door. This was so not good. She had to take control of this situation fast before she did something she’d regret. Halfway down the outside steps she found herself blurting out what was on her mind somehow.

“Look, before it gets weird - this thing with us...it doesn’t have to mean anything.” She walked down the last few steps to him.

Well, here goes awkward conversation #2 for the night.

She was kicking herself for starting this, but it was too late now. She’d have to brazen it out.

“Oh?” He stopped and turned to face her.

“I mean...I don’t expect anything.”

“You don’t.” His expression was indecipherable as always so she just soldiered on.

“You were hurtin’. I was hurtin’.” She shrugged, trying to play it off. “It was just comfort.”

Angel looked at her thoughtfully.

“Is that what it was?” He drew closer.

“You got another name for it?” She smirked.

He was inches away now. The smile faded from her face.

“Yeah.” He growled. “I do.”

He kissed her hard then, and she forgot what she was trying to say.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel was damned tired of being dismissed by women today. It didn’t sit a all well with him to be put in his place. And what was Faith thinking? That it didn’t mean anything and she could just write it all off? As if he gave himself to random women everyday... Last night had been a revelation! He’d both given and received pleasure without activating the curse. And he’d left her bed feeling alive for the first time in years. Buffy had made him feel human again but with Faith it was something else. He didn’t want to define it yet but it felt powerful, important, real. He wasn’t about to let that go. He was staking his claim here but Faith just didn’t seem to get that, obviously she needed a lesson on exactly what lay between them. To dismiss it as no more than cold comfort was almost insulting.

“Is this just comfort, Faith?” He growled pushing her up against the wall. “Is this?”

He yanked up her shirt to devour her breasts and neck then pulled her roughly to him. Her jeans were undone and his deft fingers inside before she could form the words to reply. She was too consumed by his hands and mouth and what they were doing to her to answer. Angel was delighted to feel her hot and wet for him already. It told him she wanted this, needed it, just as much as he did. He stripped her half naked then with the will of his vampire strength and speed. Before she could blink they were fucking hard against the alley wall.

This wasn’t romance and pretty pink fantasies, this was urgency and lust and just exactly what she needed. Funny to end up right back where they started - only a few feet from the back door and all the prying eyes and questions inside.

“They’ll hear.” She panted, remembering how he’d wanted to whisk her away last time.

“Let them.” He shut her mouth with a kiss and thrust himself home. Faith didn’t think anymore after that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A word with Wesley slid the responsibility of collecting Dawn over to Faith and Angel. Faith wanted to be the one to get her sister anyway so it wasn't a hard sell. Spike noticed she didn't seem terribly unhappy at the prospect of more time with Angel either and felt relieved. He’d never been all that comfortable as the focus of her affections, something about it put him in mind of being in the laser sights of an extremely high powered rifle. A part of him was always waiting for the deadly bullet that seemed somehow inevitable. Buffy on the other hand was like being in the sunshine on a perfect summer day. He basked in her warmth and love, soaking it up. He was quite certain he’d never get enough. Nice to know that was mutual. She seemed just as starved for his attention as he was for hers.

Both been hungry too long.

Speaking of hunger, he was dying to get her alone - anywhere as long as it was soon. She’d been fully clothed for at least 8 hours now and that simply would not do. Though he could tolerate some sexy lingerie. His mind wandered into outfits and what kind she might have and he fixed her with a heated stare. Buffy caught his look and blushed prettily.

"Give me 5 minutes."

"I'll give you 3. After that I'm throwing you over my bloody shoulder and carrying you out of here by force."

Buffy caught her breath. He was entirely too sexy when he got all commanding.

"Yes, sir."

"Oh, I'll teach you to say ‘sir’ later, Pet."

Buffy almost squeaked at the tone in his voice, but she managed to keep it together long enough to grab her things. He held the front door for her, eyes burning with lust and impatience.

The very second it closed he was upon her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel was drilling her hard against the wall, their only real cover was the deep shadow cast by the stairs and the closed door. They were less than 6 feet from the back entrance to the warehouse and the half dozen people inside. She bit into his shoulder to keep from screaming, tasting leather.

“Who do you belong to, Faith?”

He slipped his hand between them to strum at her clit.

Oh god.

“You... god, I belong to you.”

He kissed her and rubbed harder in reward. She was about to lose it and scream in earnest, consequences be damned.

“And who’s Daddy’s good girl, hmm?” He purred into her ear.

“Fuck...” he knew all her buttons already. She whimpered. “Me...”

He chuckled.

“That’s right.” He spun her around, hands against the wall to fuck her from behind. One hand clutched her possessively while the other wreaked havoc between her thighs. How could he make it this good inside 10 minutes in a dirty alley? This frenzied coupling rivaled their first time last night and that had been spectacular. Here she was, pants halfway off and tangled around her ankles, palms being scraped raw on the concrete wall, getting fucked within an inch of her life. So when he growled “You’re mine.” in her ear she couldn’t help but yield.

“Yes.”

“I’m gonna make sure you never forget it.”

When he sunk his fangs into the junction of her neck and shoulder she came violently, biting down on Angel’s hand where he muffled her cries. With a spurt of rich Slayer blood filling his mouth and the feel of her heat and bite he was lost. Angel came with her in a wave that seemed to draw out for an infinite moment, stifling his own roar against her back. Coming down, he turned her around for a kiss, tasting his own blood in her mouth, tasting them both. She didn’t pull away, didn’t blanch at the taste of blood like other girls would, but then again she wasn’t like other girls. Faith wasn’t like anyone. She simply kissed him back, mirroring his barely checked passion. He felt himself rising again at her touch and chuckled, pulling away.

“The effect you have on me, woman!”

“Mutual, baby.” she grinned, reaching down to pull up her jeans. “But you’re hell on my wardrobe.” She modeled the new tears down the side of one leg, buttoning up her fly.

“Don’t.” He warned, dark eyes burning.“You’ll get me started again...” He grabbed her for another kiss, growling. “I could buy you clothes just to rip them off.”

“Damn.” She kissed him back.

It’d been a long time since she’d been the focus of anyone’s undivided attention. It was nice, even if it was mostly physical. But he’d said she was his, that she belonged to him... She shrugged it off. It was never good to put too much stock into anything a guy said in bed. Even if you wanted it to be true.

Especially then.

She was getting in over her head here. The sex was intense and that always got her into trouble. If she didn’t watch herself, she’d drown. The memory of Spike and what it cost her was still fresh in her mind. She frowned, it still cut - though admittedly not nearly as much as it did yesterday. Angel turned out to be the best medicine.

Who knew?

She’d always thought he was sexy in that dark, mysterious way. He had that bad boy tryin’ to make good thing goin’ that was just so hot. But she had no idea he was like this. Buffy never said anything that even hinted at this kind of passion. Hell, they barely even had sex that she knew of. So this beast in bed thing was kind of a surprise.

A pretty damn good one too.

“What are you grinnin’ at?” He asked with a smile of his own.

“I was just thinkin’ that you got the cure for what ails me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The instant they were outside Spike swung Buffy up and into his arms to kiss her breathless. God he was hungry for her. All day he’d longed for this; to be alone, to touch her. He cursed the necessities that kept them apart, cursed the very world for needing her when he needed her. He’d almost lost her today. If that git had been any more powerful or Buffy any less a Slayer...

Christ.

He couldn’t bear the thought of her absence, her death... when he’d only just won her. And now that they were finally alone he wasn’t going to waste a second on useless words. With an eye towards his surroundings he managed to continue their kiss and keep them both upright as he strode forward. He had a loose plan forming. They were asked to stay close while Faith and Angel were gone. Riley wasn’t likely to show again, but Glory was still on the loose. Wouldn’t do to leave the humans without protection. He could do that - and he would for Buffy and the care she bore them. What he would not do is be denied. Spike figured two doors down was enough. With the windows shut the sounds of cries and roars wouldn’t carry.

Much.

He smirked. Arms full of sweet Buffy he found the door he wanted and busted it in with a well-placed boot. He kicked it shut behind them with an impatient grunt, eyes open for a place to land. He set her down on the first stack of packing crates he found, stripping off his coat and kneeling before her. Her shirt was pushed up and her pants undone a second later. It was all he could do not to rip her clothes off and out of his way. He slid the bra straps down her arms yanking at the cups to bare her pretty tits, not bothering to unhook it in his haste. He latched on to the first exposed nipple while palming her other breast, going from one to the other and back again. He felt feverish with the need to possess her. He traced a delicate path up her chest, licked her throat and moved up to her lips again for a bruising kiss. Buffy had never seen him so wild before, so desperate for her, it made her tingle with excitement.

He moved back down to her breasts and over her belly with kisses and licks, tongue delving into her navel for a moment. She gasped when he dragged her pants and undies off to bury his tongue inside of her. Spike growled at her taste, his demon craved her cream more than even blood now. He couldn’t say he blamed it. Her honey spilled onto his tongue; she so wet, so hot. Buffy’s strong thighs around his ears, gasping and whimpering as she surrendered, his mouth full of her taste - Spike figured this was as close to Heaven as a shite like him was likely to get. He fully intended to enjoy it, letting his demon out to have the treat it had been craving all day.

Buffy felt him change, felt the ridges against her sensitive flesh, felt his teeth and God help her it turned her on. This animal at her center, growling as it ate her...she’d never understood that term before; “eat out”. The tentative and cautious way Riley approached it didn’t even begin to compare to what Spike did. He made her a meal, used his hands, his whole face to enjoy her. Approached her like a gourmand feasting upon his favorite delicacy after weeks of starvation. Buffy fell back on the dusty wood, succumbing to the onslaught of her lover’s attentions.

Face wiggling, he spread her thighs wider to dive in holding them apart while he licked her from bottom to top and back again. He was practically purring his enjoyment, little rumbles of appreciation vibrated through her. His tongue went everywhere, dove into her sex, tickled her ass, swept over her mound and up her inner thighs. She was breathless and shivering at his touch. Buffy was certain she’d never been this wet before. It felt like she was dripping, like she could leave a puddle on the floor below her.

Spike was dying, sensorium on overload, surrounded by her scent and taste and ecstatic cries. He was
torn between savouring the moment and simply spearing her on to his cock. He planned on waiting but it was almost painful now, he was near blind with longing. His inner poet adamantly protested the idea of taking his beloved in such a manner. Was their first time really to be on the cold cement floor of some filthy warehouse? William wanted candles and rose petals. Meanwhile his demon only wanted in. Demon wanted to devour her and possess her in every way imaginable. Demon wanted to make her his. While William wanted to belong to her.

His whole body thrummed with desire, his want a terrible, hungry need inside him. But what does she want? William whispered. What does she deserve? He truly despised the ponce. And he’d been hearing from him all too frequently since Buffy came back into his life. Spike wanted to roar with frustration but... William was right. Buffy deserved more than a dirty floor. He wanted her to remember their first time with joy, he wanted her to feel cherished, adored. And he didn’t want to ruin a perfect moment with his trademark impetuousness. Times like this he dearly missed his formerly evil self. The Spike of yore would’ve had her 5 different ways by the end of the first night and they’d’ve been shagging like rabbits all week.
Damn William and his gentlemanly notions!

He pulled back from Buffy with a frustrated snarl hurrying to strip off his shirt and open his jeans. He’d never felt this hard before. It was all he could do not to bury himself inside her and claim her right there. He took himself in hand instead and bent to her once more, satisfying himself on her taste and pleasure. Tuning out his own need he tuned instead to her; her cries and moans, the feel of her heat radiating out to him, the taste of her satiny sweet in his mouth. Buffy was trembling on the very edge. Instinctively he knew what she needed; when to go soft and slow, when to speed up, rough tongue working her over. If he timed it just right, they would come together.

He felt her whole body tremble, thighs twitching as she let go. When she screamed for him he rose to his feet, giving himself the one pleasure he would allow. He pulled her roughly to him, sliding his erection between her slippery lips and over her clit. She burned with slick heat, it was dizzying. He had just enough sense left to direct his movements. Cock in hand he rubbed the soft tip against her clit, drawing out her orgasm and beginning his own. He let go and pressed himself to her, cool length sliding over sensitive flesh, hitting her in just the right spot. He wrapped her legs around his waist and planted his hands to thrust against her. Her body arched hard as she spasmed, howling as she came for him again. He joined her in the next instant growling out his satisfaction as he spilled over her belly.

Watching him come set her off all over again, his demon face never more beautiful, never more wild and monstrous, and she rolled into a another set of multiples grinding herself into him with abandon. He kissed her then rough tongue invading her mouth, full of the taste of her. Some part of her rational mind thought it might be sick to like this so much, sick to get off on the attentions of a soulless beast. But the Slayer in her, that dark inner part that was demon itself, rejoiced and silenced all her doubts. This was perfect, this was right, this was all that she had been missing.

Spike went from mouth to throat, licking the sweat from her neck with his long cat tongue. She shivered with pleasurable chills as she came down, whole body singing. She thought he would stop and lay with her but his rough licks continued over her collar bone and down her chest to each nipple, nuzzling and nipping gently as she squirmed. He kissed her bellybutton and found his way to her pussy again to lick it clean, ignoring her weak protests.

Once was never enough for him. He wanted at least 3 more serious orgasms out of her before they returned. He speared her with his demon tongue thrusting deep to taste her, flexing and tickling in a way no human could. Buffy could only gasp and moan, fingers tangled in his hair as she rocked against his mouth. Her next peak built quickly, he loved that about her. Once he got her started it was as if the gates were thrown open. He could bring her off almost endlessly after.

That was exactly what he intended to do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the heated urgency of the alley Faith allowed herself to be contentedly lead to the car and tucked up under his arm for the ride to the motel. She tried not to think too hard about what they were doing and just let it be. It was still dark, knowing Dawn she was passed out cold and snoring without a care. She was used to Faith’s late-night activities and would know to look for a note if her sister wasn’t there when she woke. Faith always left a note though Dawn rarely got them. She usually slept like a rock til a blaring alarm woke her for school. On the weekends she’d be out til almost noon before stumbling into the kitchen for coco puffs and cartoons.

Faith slipped in quietly and brought Angel in behind her. Her sister was face down on the double bed, tangled in the sheets and blankets. She was always a restless sleeper, Faith could remember watching Dawn toss in her crib. It got so that Mom wouldn’t even put blankets in the bed at night. “My little hurricane” she called her. Funny to think that never actually happened, it felt as real as the day she was Chosen, as vivid as the night her mother died. In the end it didn’t matter to her, her love was real and Dawn was the only family she had.

She woke her little sister gently, shaking her shoulder.
“C’mon Little D. Time to get up.”

“But it’s not even light yet...” She whined groggily, cracking an eyelid at the night dark windows.

“I know, but we gotta move. Angel’s here so mind your manners.”

Dawn grumbled and buried her head under her pillow. “Come on now.” Faith swatted her rear playfully. “You got 5 minutes before I start tellin’ him embarrassin’ childhood stories.”

“Okay, okay!” Dawn threw off the covers and rolled out of the ratty bed.

Angel watched the two sisters interact and found himself charmed. He was seeing Faith’s softer side. He never realized she had one. He usually saw her in a crisis, in full Slayer mode - and that was a sight to behold. He always did love a little fight in his women and Faith had plenty o’ that. The two girls bantered back and forth playfully trading jabs and bits of news. He was pleased when she referenced him, it made him feel included somehow. He found he liked being inside the circle of their warmth.

“So what’s the sitch? Why the big move out?” Dawn asked finally.

“It’s bad, D.” Faith spoke over her shoulder, digging through her duffel for fresh clothes. “Looks like the Apocalypse is comin’ up fast. It’s ugly enough to bring Angel down from LA and Buffy out of retirement.”

Dawn’s eyes bulged at that. She wondered why Buffy was at the last Scooby meeting, hadn’t seen much of her in the past few years. Funny how she missed her, like a cousin or aunt you didn’t see often but still loved Buffy always felt like family. It had to be serious to pull her away from Riley and her wedding planning.

“Should I be worried?” She chewed her lip anxiously “What can I do?”

Angel stepped in before Faith could speak.
“I don’t want you to worry, Dawn. My team’s on it, both Slayers are on it. We won’t let anything happen to you.”

Faith was more than a little touched by his concern for her sister, but she tried to shrug it off. She didn’t want to read too much into it. Tossing her clean clothes over one shoulder she approached Dawn with her usual self-assurance.

“We got this, D. But there’s always something you can do. Right now you can get breakfast and pack up while I grab a quick shower.”

“Okay.” She smiled, reassured to be at the center of so much protection and concern.

While Dawn rummaged in the bags for suitable breakfast food Angel followed Faith to the bathroom door, picturing soapy water cascading down her body, golden skin slick and wet beneath his hands.

“You know I want to come in there.” He rumbled looming over her, hands on the doorframe.

She stole a glance at Dawn busy poking through grocery sacks and gave him a quick but thorough kiss.

“Next time.” She winked, pulling her t-shirt off and closing the door behind her with a saucy smile.

He stifled a growl wishing for LA and the privacy of his suite at the Hyperion. Apocalypses and little girls were in his way right now. But when he turned to see Dawn smiling brightly at him he found it suddenly difficult to be annoyed.

“Do you eat?” She asked.

“Not really, but I’ll take a coffee if you’ve got it.”

“Comin’ right up.”

He returned her cheery smile despite himself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Faith emerged from the bathroom 15 minutes later with a wet head but disappointingly fully clothed. He was hoping for a little glimpse of skin under her towel though it was probably just as well. He had to reign it in with Dawn in the room and that was the last thing he wanted to do right now. He hadn’t felt this lusty since his early vampire days with Darla. Something about Faith made it feel alright to be that free with his desires. He’d forgotten how much he enjoyed that part of himself and wanted nothing more than to be alone with her again to explore it - and her - to his satisfaction.

Faith felt his dark eyes on her as soon as she opened the bathroom door. When she looked at him his gaze was hooded but full of fire. He was making an effort to hide it from Dawn, but he couldn’t seem to hide it from her. It made her heart flutter to be the focus of all his want. And it was hard to ignore her own desires, her mind was full of all they’d done together and all she wanted to do still... She met his eyes and he saw it on her face, smelled it in the heat of her skin, the musk of her mixing with the scent of her vanilla soap. She cut her eyes to Dawn, willing him to stillness with a subtle shake of her head.

“Your turn for the shower, kiddo.” It was an effort to keep her voice even.

“ ‘Kay.” Dawn barely glanced up from her phone before shuffling into the bathroom and closing the door behind her.

Thank god for teenage self-involvement.

Angel was across the room in half a second.

“Can you be quiet?’ She asked in a whisper.

“Can you?” He growled back.

He was on his knees, biting at her stomach and hips as soon as the water started.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was hard to contain her giddiness in the car. She was light headed and euphoric after their secret quickie. He’d made her come three different ways by the time he was done, against the wall and on the floor, mouth, hands and cock. Thank god Dawn took long showers, though Faith would have gladly stayed in that room all day with him. If this was going to go on (and hope against hope it would) they’d have to make some better arrangements. She hated to push it, never wanted to be the one to lay down the boundaries. She’d sooner walk away than ask a guy to be her steady - but Dawn was involved here. She had to be careful. The kid was already sad about her break up with Spike, though she promised her she could still see him as much as she wanted. She didn’t want her going through more heartache with Angel.

Faith did her best to keep her sister untouched by her love life. She didn’t introduce her to boyfriends usually, but Spike had been special. He seemed to love Dawn from the start.

Even if he didn’t love me.

It still stung that he couldn’t find room in his heart for her when he seemed to do it so readily for Buffy. But she was a realist. It was what it was. People were like chemicals, sometimes they mixed, sometimes they didn’t. And you never knew how two people were gonna react together. Her time with Angel was a testament to that. They could power whole cities with what they had goin’ on, and she was willing to bet it was never like that for him and Buffy. So yeah, she could take it. Hey, maybe things were workin’ out just the way they oughta be. She settled back against the seat and took his hand under the cover of the high leather back. She smiled when he took it without hesitation and stroked the back of her hand softly with his thumb.

Oh yeah. Things were workin’ out just fine.
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