The past few days had been crazy in the Summers’ house for Spike. There was a new slayer in the house, one he got along with. He must have a thing for slayers. Buffy was the one slayer he’d love to be around and actually have something with, but Buffy didn’t seem to want to have anything to do with him. Faith, however, loved to hang out with him.

He wasn’t sure what the deal was with Faith, other than the body swap with Buffy. Red had gone to L.A., which he didn’t really care about, and had come back with Faith. He had noticed that Buffy wasn’t too happy about that, but she never elaborated on why.

Buffy seemed to be all right with Faith in the house now, but she was avoiding him lately. He wasn’t sure what her problem was, but every time he came into the room, she left. If it were important, she’d eventually tell him what was going on. Every time he asked, she brushed him off, so he’d stopped trying to find out. It hurt him a little that she couldn’t talk to him all of sudden. He thought they had been close, but it seemed like things had changed and he didn’t know why.

Faith was a good person to hang out with. She smoked, they could patrol together, and she didn’t treat him like everyone else did. Maybe it was because she was reformed too, but he didn’t know for sure. She really didn’t seem to care that he was a vampire, other then the fist to the nose that he had gotten when he had first met her. She wasn’t Buffy, but maybe that was okay.

After being cooped up in the basement all day, he was ready for patrol, but Buffy hadn’t invited him to go with her. He wasn’t even sure if she was home yet, but he needed to get out. He thought he was going to rip his hair out from all the estrogen in the house. If he had to hear one more minute of teenage hormone problems he would fall on a stake. And he wouldn’t miss this time.

Spike went upstairs after sliding on his duster. He wasn’t surprised to find Faith in the kitchen, on the counter like she owned the place eating potato chips out of the bag. “Hey Faith,” he greeted, smirking at her. “Seen Buffy?” Faith was definitely nice to look at, and she had a carefree attitude, even in the middle of an apocalypse. He wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing. But for now, he didn’t care.

“Hi, Spike,” Faith said, sliding off the counter next to Spike and flirtatiously caressing his leather clad bicep. He could feel the buzz from her body and it was easy not to react to her touches. “No clue, but I wish she’d hurry up.” He knew was a good-looking guy, for a vamp; and he was probably her type, but if she had any common sense she would know that he was off limits. . He hoped Faith had learned her lesson the first few times with Buffy’s men and that she wouldn’t try something with him.

Spike laughed. “Come on. She’ll have to catch up with us. I want to go out too.” The routine of being cooped up in the basement for hours on end, like a bloody pet dog waiting for mommy to come home to let him out, was wearing on his nerves. Everyday, all day, all he did was sit in the basement and wait for Buffy to come. He didn’t need Buffy’s permission do to what he wanted to do, and neither did Faith. They could leave when they wanted to, and Buffy was just going to have to deal with it.

“Thank God,” Faith said, as they left the house. “You tired of being chained up?” She had a teasing note to her voice and she wore a slight smile. “I thought you kinda liked it.” She looked up at him coyly and winked.

He smirked at her. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” He missed flirting and trading barbs with Buffy, and he was tired of being treated like something that everyone hated. Faith, at least, was interested in him. It seemed like she was always trying to bump into him and spend time with him.

Relieved to be out of the house, they walked side by side through the cemetery and relished the silence that nightfall possessed. Crickets chirped in the background, and the silver clouds were swirling around the full moon overhead. Good thing werewolves weren’t on their list of things to kill. He itched for a cigarette as his hands traveled into his pockets for his smokes. Faith offered him a light, with a tilt of her head as he lit the cigarette, and a smile. He couldn’t respond. Her smile - it seemed too flirtatious, but she hadn’t made any moves on him. Dawn said she was a sex addict and would do anything for it, but to Spike, it didn’t seem like she wanted that. Her presence just screamed sex, but she didn’t flaunt it like everyone said.

The only thing Faith did was sort of what Buffy did: she brushed up against his arm every now and then. He really, really missed that kind of contact with Buffy. He missed Buffy’s scent of vanilla too. Faith had a distinct scent of jasmine, very different from Buffy, and certainly no substitute. No one could take Buffy’s place, in any sense of the word. Spike could at least be friends with Faith, and hope that things worked out with Buffy. Hanging out with another slayer would be a very nice distraction.

They walked through the iron-wrought entrance, and took the left path into the cemetery. “Think Buffy will join us?” Faith asked. “She doesn’t really like people doing things without her permission.”

Spike shrugged. “She’s had a stick shoved up her ass lately, so who knows,” he said, blowing a stream of smoke out of his mouth. He didn’t know what Buffy’s problem was, and he was pretty much past the point of caring. She had wanted him to get his stones back, and now he had them. If she didn’t like it then that was too bad. He liked being his own man and he needed that. He needed to make his own choices based on what he wanted, not what she wanted.

“Is she pissed at me?” Faith asked, softly. “If you know?”

“Did you do something?” he asked, cocking his head at her and raising his eyebrows in a questioning manner. He could relate to Faith, and it was nice. It was hard to know when someone pissed off Buffy. The first sign was usually her fist to someone’s face and since Faith wasn’t sporting a black eye yet, he was sure that she hadn’t pissed off the blonde slayer yet.

Shrugging, Faith replied, “With Buffy? Hell, you never know. The slightest things always set her off.” Pausing, she eyeballed Spike with a cocked brow. “I thought you two still had a thing?” She rested her hands on her hips as she continued. “It’s obvious you love her, but she’s definitely not your kind of girl. She doesn’t have it in her to be with a bad boy.”

“Be news to me if we did. And you’d be surprised and what she can handle,” Spike said, as he looked straight ahead. His dream of a cozy crypt for two had long since died away. Buffy had made that very clear but he still didn’t think it was anyone else’s business about what they were doing. “But I know how you feel. You never know if you’re in trouble with her or not.”

“So, you aren’t going out with her then?” Faith asked. She was acting calm, cool, and collected, but he noticed that she was digging for information. He also noticed how she let the other subject drop, not caring if Buffy was pissed off or not. Just like he didn’t care. They were both needed in this fight, there was no time to worry about Buffy’s emotions. Not anymore.

“Never went out with Buffy,” he said.

“But you love her.” It was more of a statement than a question, one that no one needed him to answer. Flicking his cigarette to the ground, Spike smashed it out with his boot, ignoring Faith’s stare and hoping that she would get the hint that the subject was no longer up for discussion. Luckily, Faith kept her mouth shut about it. “New subject?” Faith suggested, as the silence stretched on.

“New subject,” he said in agreement. He didn’t want to talk about his relationship, or lack thereof. Buffy didn’t want it to be made a big deal of, and frankly, neither did he. It was best just to leave it in the past where it belonged. There was no sense in reopening old wounds when he had just started learning to get past them.

***

Buffy came through the door half an hour after Spike and Faith left. She closed her front door and leaned against it with a sigh. It had been a long few days, and she still had to patrol. She was looking forward to that. She looked up, just as Dawn came out of the kitchen with food in her hands.

“Hey,” Dawn said. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Spike ready for patrol?” Buffy asked. She really needed to talk to him, without Faith attached to his hip. She headed toward the kitchen, with intentions of going to the basement, but Dawn’s voice stopped her.

“He already left with Faith. They were getting antsy,” Dawn said, before Buffy even entered the kitchen.

“Oh,” Buffy said softly, the disappointment settling deeply. Spike was supposed to patrol with her. It seemed like now, all of a sudden, he had a new slayer. It was like she was being replaced. Why couldn’t she ever have something of her own that Faith didn’t try to sink her teeth into? Angel and Riley had fallen for it, but she didn’t think Spike would too. “I guess I’ll go see if I can find them.” She headed back towards the front door and closed it with finality. Her day couldn’t get any worse.

***

Not long into their patrol, Spike and Faith stumbled onto a nest of vampires. The activity in the cemetery had seemed to triple in the last few weeks, since the First had showed its ugly head. A vampire had risen and decided to give chase, leading them to a nice crypt full of vampires.

“You take the ones on the left, I’ll take the right,” Faith said, heading away before Spike could say anything. Her slayer senses were kicking in as she took control. They staked a few before the vamps started running out of the crypt. “I got ‘em, Blondie,” she said, heading after the group. Before Spike could respond, she had left the crypt. She hadn’t missed Sunnydale that was for sure.

Spike growled and staked the last two before running after her. She was just as bad as Buffy. Stupid slayers were going to get themselves, and him, killed. She was taking on 5 of the vampires that had gotten away and he staked one off the bat before pulling one away from her. He landed a solid punch to a jaw, growling in satisfaction as it crunch under his fist.

Another vampire joined the fight and the vampires got lucky, and pinned him to the ground. Even his strength wasn’t enough to lift the fat vampire sitting on top of his chest. He could never figure out how vampires got fat, unless they were fat when they were turned. There was one sitting on his legs, preventing him from using them. Thank god he didn’t have to breathe, because the vampire on top of his chest felt like he weighed half a ton. A normal human would have passed out by now.

He saw a flash of brown hair and the pressure on his legs disappeared, and immediately after, Faith jumped on the back of the last and staked it. As the vampire exploded, Faith fell on top of Spike with an “oomf”.

She broke her fall, putting her hands on the ground next to his head. Her chest was rising and falling heavily against his. He could definitely see why Buffy had her eyes on her, she was a very tempting girl. Her curves were larger and more fuller then Buffy’s against his solid muscles. She pushed herself up so she was straddling his hips. “You okay?” She asked. He was panting, and he found that a little odd. Only Buffy cause that reaction in him.

“Peachy,” Spike said. “Really shouldn’t have gone after all of them on your own.” He couldn’t help but notice the way she was sitting on him. Her body felt a lot different from Buffy’s. Where Buffy was soft and feminine, Faith was rough and badass, a complete one-eighty from the slayer that held his heart. Faith looked a little demanding, and he could feel the power rolling off of her.

Faith smiled. “Yeah, but I handled them. Do we have to go home?” she asked. “Cause honestly? That house is too much for me.” Coming from an all-woman’s prison to a house full of teenage girls wasn’t her cup of tea. She was almost on the verge of insanity, and she didn’t think she could handle it.

“No. I’m not ready to go either. Too many teenage girls,” he said, relaxed beneath her. It was nice to be out and fooling around with someone. He would prefer it to be Buffy, but that didn’t seem to be an option. Buffy was pissed at him. For what, he didn’t know. But he wasn’t going to just sit in the basement and sulk over it. Not when he could be out with a beautiful woman.

***

Buffy walked through the cemetery and stopped short when she saw Faith sitting on top of Spike. Tears came to her eyes when he made no move to push her off. In fact, his hands came up to rest on Faith’s thighs. Jealousy was raging through her at another slayer — not just another girl, but another slayer— putting the moves on Spike. She shouldn’t be upset. She didn’t own Spike, and she couldn’t count how many times she had said that she and Spike were over, but he had always been devoted to her. It was nice to have someone to rely on, like Spike, and she slowly felt that piece of her being ripped away - by Faith. “Spike,” she whispered, too softly for him to hear her. She turned and ran home, as tears cascaded down her face.

***

“You wanna finish patrolling?” Spike asked, raising an eyebrow. “Because I have to say, being flat on my back beneath a slayer, it’s quite pleasant.” He had meant it to be a joke, but he quickly realized how dirty it had come out. Faith didn’t seem to mind. She was probably taking it the same way he was. Where Buffy would get off him and call him disgusting, Faith did the exact opposite, and laughed.

Faith smiled, and they both got off the ground as Spike pulled a twig out of her hair. Faith blushed. “You’re funny,” she teased. Buffy must have been some kind of idiot not to have this guy all to herself, but Buffy was usually blind to what was right in front of her face.

“You sound like another slayer I know,” he said, raising an eyebrow in amusement. He didn’t know what had made him fix her hair. It must have been an impulse. He shoved his hands in the pockets of his duster, as they clenched into fists. What was wrong with him?

“Believe me, I didn’t mean to,” Faith said, smirking. “She gets all the good guys to fall for her, and she’s just too high and mighty to see what’s right in front of her face.” She rolled her eyes; and he noticed the jealous that flashed rapidly across her eyes. “You know, you’re definitely her kind of guy, and I’m pretty sure I’m you’re kind of girl. I can see that Buffy isn’t doing it for you. You’re tense and edgy all the time. I see the way you look at her. It’s very clear that Buffy didn’t return the feelings.”

“Well, I’m just friends with Buffy,” Spike said. It wouldn’t be anything new if she thought that. He really didn’t care, and he didn’t know why. Deep down he knew that he missed Buffy, but every day he felt that everything he had worked for with her was slipping away. It was killing him, but he didn’t know what to do. “And it’s really not any of your business. You don’t know the first thing about me, Slayer.”

“I’m sure I’m about to find out,” she said as he walked away from her.

Buffy’s legs throbbed in pain as she pushed herself the whole way home at full slayer speed. She didn’t want to stop for anything. The back porch, her only sanctuary, proved to be the only place that she could sit and think. She could see the girls in the living room from the front yard, and she didn’t want to go in yet. So she made her way back around the porch, escaping the crushing scene she had just witnessed. How could this happen? He was supposed to be hers. How could he fall for Faith’s tricks? She sat down and held her head in her hands. Someone opened the back door a few minutes later and she heard the soft footfalls on the boards of the porch.

“Buffy?” came Giles’s voice.

“Giles, not now,” Buffy said, softly. “I need to be alone.” And she didn’t have anything to say to Giles. He would jump for joy at what had just happened. His precious slayer wouldn’t be involved with a vampire now. She didn’t want it rubbed in her face and she didn’t want to hear any lectures.

Giles sat next to her. “I’m sorry.”

“I need to have Spike on our team, Giles. He’s one of our strongest warriors,” Buffy told him. “And you have to accept that.” The words were almost choked as she forced them out of her mouth. She almost wanted to just make sure that Giles knew that he wouldn’t have to worry, and to finally back off, but she had to keep the front up. There was no time for weakness, not with the First getting stronger everyday.

“Have you been crying?” he asked, taking in her swollen face.

“I’m okay,” she assured him with a fake smile that she had mastered the year before. “Just had a rough night on patrol. Decided to turn in early.” It wasn’t a total lie. She did have a rough night, just not for the reason that she gave Giles.

Giles looked at her for a few moments but he got to his feet and left her with her thoughts. She felt so run down and exhausted. Maybe she was finally going to have a breakdown. However, she didn’t know what any of them could do to help her.
***

When Buffy finally opened her swollen eyes the next morning, she wished she hadn’t. All she wanted to do was stay in her comfy bed. She dressed quietly in black jeans and a black sleeveless turtleneck before heading downstairs. The girls had left a nice mess of the kitchen and, as usual, left it for her to clean up. What a bunch of pigs. There was a pile of dirty dishes in the sink and she turned on the faucet to get a head start on them. She didn’t even look up when she heard the basement door open.

“Morning, Buffy,” came Spike’s soft voice.

“Morning,” she said, not looking at him. She didn’t want to talk to him and she wished he would leave the room so she could be by herself. She knew if he looked at her, he would ask her what was wrong and she wasn’t sure how long she could lie about her pain. She couldn’t stand to look at him after what she had seen last night. It was too heart-breaking. All she could picture was he and Faith hooking up. However, things got worse. She saw Faith saunter into the kitchen out of the corner of her and the brunette slayer immediately went to Spike’s side. “Good morning,” she said, in her deep sexy voice. Buffy never said good morning like that.

Spike smiled down at her. “Good morning, Sweetness,” he replied. Buffy tried to ignore it, find some relief in the fact he hadn’t called her “luv” or “pet”, but she didn’t like how close Faith was getting to him. Spike had never called her ‘Sweetness’ so she wasn’t sure if she liked that Faith got her own nickname, or if she was glad that Spike hadn’t give Faith one of his nicknames for her.

Buffy scrubbed the plate faster, even though it was squeaky clean, and she could hear them giggling and whispering to each other. Tears welled in her eyes as she turned off the water. She dried her hands before she left the room. She had to get away from them. She practically ran upstairs, pushing past a few remaining potentials and headed to her room. Angrily, she wiped her tears away as she flopped on her bed. This wasn’t happening. Spike was supposed to be the one that she could count on, something that she didn’t have to share with anyone.
***
Downstairs, Faith looked up at Spike after Buffy had rushed from the kitchen. “Is she okay?”

“I don’t know, but I’m going to find out,” Spike answered, leaving the brunette slayer in the kitchen. Something was wrong with his slayer, and she needed him. He followed her muffled sobs to her room and knocked on her door. “Buffy?” His heart ached to see her in pain, and all he wanted to do was make it all right again.

“Go away,” Buffy yelled. That didn’t sound good. She was definitely upset about something. She had never yelled at him like that before. Not in a long time anyways. Somehow he had managed to screw things up already. He didn’t know what he did, but he wasn’t going to let it stew.

“Buffy?” He turned the knob again, finding it unlocked. He hoped that she didn’t throw a stake at him or something. “What happened?” he asked, sitting next to her. She was curled on her side, her back to him, but he could see her flushed cheeks. Tears were slowly making tracks down her face, and she hadn’t bothered to hide them, but she was trying to keep them quiet, not wanting to alert anyone that she was in pain. Such a strong girl she was, but he could see her rapidly fading façade.

“Please go away,” she whispered. He frowned and turned more toward her. He wanted to touch her, but it seemed like she was mad at him personally, not something in general. He had obviously done something that had really hurt her, but he couldn’t think of anything.

“Did something happen on patrol?” he asked, reaching out to touch her. He wanted to reassure that he hadn’t done anything, or that he was sorry for whatever she was upset over. He wanted to make it up to her, no matter what it was. They had worked so hard to rebuild their relationship, whatever it qualified as, and he didn’t want anything to ruin that.

“Don’t touch me,” Buffy said, getting out of bed. She glared at him the best she could before leaving her room. He saw the pain in her eyes, and he had seen it twice before, when he had shown her what White Bread was up to: betrayal. That was the worst thing for him to see in her eyes, especially directed at him, again. He had tried so hard to forget that look since he had… since the bathroom. The way she was looking at him now was enough to almost drive him to his knees and beg her forgiveness all over again.

Angrily, he stood up and followed her down the stairs, calling her name. “Buffy.” She could just run away every time they had a problem and this one was killing her. He wasn’t going to let her close in on herself. They were past that. He thought she trusted him, and he didn’t want anything to ruin that.

Faith looked up from the living room as Buffy came downstairs with Spike close behind her. “B?”

“I hope you’re happy,” Buffy said angrily. Spike touched her shoulder and she flinched. “I don’t want you touching me,” she said, glaring at him. She walked out of the house into the sunlight, preventing Spike from following her.

Faith frowned and Spike sat next to her on the sofa. “I’ll talk to her later,” he sighed. “Something must have happened last night.” Something he had done. But he hadn’t seen Buffy all night, so he couldn’t even imagine what was going through her mind.

“Where’s Buffy?” Dawn asked as she paused in the doorway of the living room.

“She went out. She’s upset,” Faith said.

“I can’t understand why,” Dawn growled in sarcasm.

Spike looked down at Faith before going over to Dawn. “You know why she’s upset?” Dawn looked like she was going to set him on fire, like she had promised if he ever hurt her sister again, which he had managed to do.

“Yeah,” Dawn said, going to the kitchen.

He went after her. “What happened? She was fine yesterday,” he said. His eyes were wide, begging for information about what happened to his slayer. Yesterday morning he had watched her move around the kitchen as she pouted at the mess. He poured her a glass of orange juice, made her drink that and said goodbye to her before she went to work. He didn’t see her after that.

“You weren’t all snuggly with Faith yesterday,” Dawn rasped at him, angrily.

“Buffy and I are just friends,” Spike said. “Just like me and Faith.” There had to be another reason. He hadn’t done anything with Faith other than hang out with her. “Did she tell you something?”

“That’s why she makes googly eyes at you and she came home crying last night. The only thing I could get out of her was ‘I hate him’,” Dawn said. “She went looking for you and Faith but she came home in tears. So I know you did something to her.”

Everything made sense now. Buffy went looking for him when she had gotten home. However, he never saw her, or said anything to her, so she must have seen something and taken it the wrong way. The only thing he could think of was when Faith fell on him, and she thought it was more than it was. He would have to go find her if she didn’t return home, and then explain what happened.
*

After leaving the house, Buffy had wandered for hours, not knowing what to do. Nightfall came, and she headed towards the cemetery. She cursed her feet for taking her to Spike’s cemetery, but she wasn’t in the mood for patrol. Her boots made clicks on the paved path and she collapsed on a bench, deep inside the cemetery. She couldn’t hold her own body up anymore. She needed some rest, but she couldn’t bear to go home right now.

She could have screamed when Spike appeared by her side. “Buffy?” he whispered. He was starting that pattern of being around when she didn’t want to see him.

Buffy raised her swollen and angry face to his. “Go away.” She crossed her arms and looked away from him. He just didn’t get it. But she couldn’t figure out why he cared all of a sudden. Everything she had worked for, trying to repair their relationship, he seemed so willing to throw it away. She thought they had gotten closer ever since she brought him back from the First. They had spent a lot of time together, starting the healing process for them both. And for Faith to just replace her like that was killing her.

“Why are you mad at me?” he asked, going to sit next to her.

“I’m not,” Buffy snapped, getting up and moving away from him. Her body trembled, as she hurried to put as much distance between them as possible. Even when he was near her, all she wanted to do was tell him how much she hated that he had chosen Faith over her, but she didn’t want to give him that satisfaction.

“You haven’t been this bitchy since last year. Obviously, I did something to make you mad,” Spike said, standing. “Where were you last night?”

“I was running a little late and you guys weren’t home when I finally got home,” she said. “So I went looking for you and Faith but you guys had everything under control.” She walked away from him. She could already feel the words bubbling out and she didn’t want to give him that satisfaction either.

Spike grabbed her arm. “Buffy would you just talk to me?” he pleaded.

Buffy didn’t face him. “Spike, I don’t want to hurt you so please leave me alone.” He was making it really hard for her not to smash her fist into his nose, but she wasn’t that girl anymore. She didn’t want to abuse him. He didn’t really deserve that. She thought he did, but some time later, she would regret hitting him. She knew it.

He did let go of her arm, but moved in front of her path. “Buffy, we haven’t had a fight in a long time. I don’t want to have one now. Please tell me why you’re upset,” he pleaded again, softly.

“Fine, you wanna know what’s bothering me? Faith has taken everything from me and it’s tearing me apart. She took Angel, my friends, my job, Riley, you, and now she basically kicked me out of my house. But you know what? I don’t care. She can have it all. I quit.” Buffy said it all in a rush, tears in her eyes as she left Spike. She needed to get away, and she didn’t want to return. She wouldn’t be able to watch them everyday and try to do her job; it was too hard.

Spike went after her. “Buffy, wait a minute,” he said, grabbing her arm. “What are you talking about? You are totally wrong.”

“Nothing,” Buffy whimpered, pulling her arm from his grasp. “Just leave me alone.” She felt like a weak little girl and she hated that. She was the slayer. A better slayer then Faith could ever be so she wasn’t a blubbering little girl.

“No, Buffy, stop,” Spike said, grabbing her arm again. “Let me explain.”

“Let go of me,” she flared. There was nothing to explain. She got his message loud and clear the night before and this morning. “You go home to your new slayer and leave me alone.”

This time when she walked away, Spike let her. There was nothing he could say that could explain what she had seen or the way the two of them had acted together. She almost ran away from Spike, but settled for a fast paced walk, looking over her shoulder every now and then to make sure he didn’t follow her. But she saw him drop his head and leave the cemetery. Good. She could be alone.

Buffy made her way to the only place she could think of that she could be safe. She pushed the door open to the mansion and scrunched up her nose at the dust. She couldn’t quite care at that point. Pulling out her cell phone, she called the one person that she thought could make this right. She dialed the number for the hotel and waited.

“Hello?” Angel’s soft voice came through her cell phone.

“Angel?” Buffy asked, and wished she hadn’t whimpered his name. He had to fix this. Make Faith get out of her life; make her stop taking over her life. It was his fault that she was here, so he had to fix it. “Why did you send her here?! She ruined everything. Take her back!”

“Buffy?” Angel asked. “Are you okay? What are you talking about?”

“No, Angel!” She screamed into her phone. “I’m not okay. You made Willow bring Faith here and Faith took everything!” How didn’t he understand her the first time? “Take her back to L.A.”

“Wait, Buffy,” Angel said, patiently. “Slow down. Where are you?”

“The mansion,” she told him, trying to calm down. “I don’t know what else to do. I just want her to leave.” Angel wouldn’t understand why, and she hoped if she had to tell him he wouldn’t be judgmental on her.

“Don’t go anywhere. I’m on my way,” Angel said, hanging up.

Buffy hung up her phone and waited for Angel. She didn’t expect him to come right away. She knew once he got here and found out the real reasons behind her anger toward Faith, he’d rip Spike a new one. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that. She could feel her body draining of energy as she collapsed on the couch. She could care less about the dust, as she curled her hand under her cheek. Her eyes fell closed, no longer able to stay open, as she fell asleep.

An hour and a half later, Buffy’s eyes fluttered open when she heard Angel run into the mansion. “You’re here,” she whispered as he gave her a small smile. “That was fast.” Her body felt heavy as she pushed herself up into a sitting position. Her face felt swollen, like it had for the past several hours, and she must look like crap to him.

“Broke every speed limit to get here.” Angel came over and sat next to her. “Tell me what happened.”

Buffy proceeded to tell him everything. She started with telling him that Spike had a soul and what had happened between them, leaving out the rape part. She told him that first had kidnapped Spike and how things had been between her and Spike since she had rescued him. She knew she had to make Angel understand her feelings for Spike. “Angel, I know you hate Spike but I need him. Faith took him from me and my role as leader. I don’t know what to do,” she whimpered, curled up in his lap. “We had such a strong friendship and we were doing so well with the girls. And all of that was just thrown away. He just… moved on to her like I wasn’t even there.”

“Come on. I’ll take you home and we’ll get this sorted out,” he said, standing with her in her arms.

She nodded against him. That wasn’t what she was expecting. She had been expecting him to give her a lecture about Spike, but he didn’t. She didn’t want to question his motives right now. “I just want something that’s mine for once,” she said, softly. “I feel so lost and I didn’t know what to do. You were the only one I could think of to call.”

Angel kissed her forehead. “I’ll talk care of everything,” he assured her softly. “I didn’t send Faith here to cause problems. Thought you could use her help. Apparently something didn’t go right.”

“Nothing is right,” the tired slayer muttered. “Wish you’d take her back with you.” But in reality Buffy knew she needed Faith in this fight. She didn’t know how she was going to get through that if Spike and Faith were going to be making with the smoochies now. Buffy wouldn’t be able to concentrate on what she was supposed to be doing. She’d be miserable.

She was exhausted when they got to her house, but she couldn’t close her eyes. There would be no point. Angel carried her up the stairs and she helped him open the door. The house was quiet and she heard her sister acknowledge her presence. “Buffy,” Dawn cried out, going over to them. “Are you okay?”

Buffy shook her head slightly. “No, Angel can you take me upstairs so I can talk to Dawn?” She whispered. She didn’t look at Spike when he came out of the kitchen nor did she care to acknowledge his growl at Angel’s presence. She sniffled a little but she was thankful when Angel took her right upstairs to her room. He gently laid her on her bed and Dawn joined her. “Thanks.”

“I’m going to talk to Spike,” he said, looking down at her. “And I’m going to hurt him. I’ll knock some sense into him.”

Buffy closed her eyes and sniffled. “Okay,” she said. “Just take it outside.” She didn’t have the energy to knock any sense into him. She looked up at Dawn as Angel left the room. What did her sister know? Did Spike tell her anything when he came home earlier?

Dawn pushed Buffy’s hair out of her face and handed her a tissue to blow her nose. “Spike said you weren’t coming home.”

“I wasn’t. I called Angel, asked him to take Faith back to L.A.,” Buffy murmured, blowing her nose and tossing the tissue into the garbage can. “But I don’t think he’s going to. I saw them kissing in the cemetery and I was devastated. He just… he just threw what we had away for her.”

Dawn slid her arms around Buffy and gave her a comforting hug. “What are you going to do now?” She asked.

Buffy shrugged. “I’m not sure,” she said, pulling back. “I might have to get over it if I’m gunna be able to focus on the bigger picture.” But as far as she was concerned, Faith could take over and do Buffy’s job. Faith thought it was some big party, when it really wasn’t. They were in the worst battle of their life, even if it hadn’t gotten to its worst part yet, they still weren’t the stronger warriors this time. They didn’t have a plan or anything that would gaurentee the safety of the world.

“Want me set him on fire?” Her sister teased. “Might make you feel better.”

***

Downstairs, Spike was really worried about Buffy. He had not been happy when Angel had returned to the house with his broken slayer in his arms. That was the last thing he wanted to see. After leaving the cemetery, he had come back to the house and sat on the porch for an hour or so, hoping Buffy would come home and let him explain. But she never did. He thought she was serious and he finally went inside. He didn’t talk to anyone, just went to the basement, locking the door and sat alone on his cot with his thoughts. When he saw Angel come downstairs, Spike knew his Sire was pissed. “I want you outside right now,” Angel growled.

Spike looked at him closely. “What happened to Buffy?” He asked, giving a growl when Angle manhandled him to the front porch. He hadn’t had a second to formulate his next question when Angel smashed his fist into his nose. Spike regained his footing in the middle of the yard. “What the hell was that for?” He growled. He had forgotten how much force his sire could use when he was angry.

“Do you have any idea what you have done to Buffy?” Angel flared, stalking toward him.

“No. She wouldn’t tell me,” Spike answered. But he had some idea. He couldn’t be sure, and Buffy wouldn’t talk to him or let him explain himself. “Didn’t expect you to be here, but I shouldn’t be surprised. Always coming to Buffy’s rescue.”

“She called me crying her eyes out on the phone. How Faith stole everything from her. You’re the reason Buffy is the way she is. She’s dieing inside because of you,” Angel blazed, as he circled the younger vampire. “So yeah I did come, because she had no one else.”

“What a minute,” Spike said, as he stopped turning in circles. “I didn’t do anything to her.” He was so confused. What did Faith have to do with anything that he did? Unless Buffy did see something in the cemetery or if Faith said something to her that made her think that something happened between the two of them. “I don’t know what Buffy told you, but she’s wrong.”

“You and Faith?” Angel snapped. “I sent Faith here to help not ruin Buffy’s life. You were the only one that she could turn to and you turned on her.”

Spike paused. “Buffy and I are just friends. She made it very clear she only wanted to be friends so it shouldn’t matter that I am having a relationship with Faith.” Which he wasn’t. They were just friends. And he was just friends with Buffy. It was easier that way, especially right now with the First meddling in their lives.

“She told me everything that has happened. About your soul. She thought she was finally going to have a life with you. She’s up there dying of a broken heart. Literally. So I don’t care who you are just friends with,” Angel growled. “Had I not come to her, she would have let herself become a snack to someone. If you did replace Buffy with Faith I’m taking her back to L.A. and helping her through this. She asked me to take Faith away, but I’m going to take her. The choice is yours. God help me for saying that.”

Spike stared at his sire as he was left alone. Angel was going to take his girl away? Like leave town? He made his way to the porch steps and sat down. What was he going to do? He had no idea how to make this better. He didn’t even look up as Faith joined him on the porch a few minutes later. “Angel told me a little of what happened. He’s taking Buffy to L.A.,” she whispered. “We weren’t doing anything.”

“Buffy thinks we were,” Spike answered not looking at her. “I don’t get it. I didn’t think it mattered. But I guess I was wrong.” That wasn’t even the point. He somehow managed to hurt the woman he loved more the unlife itself, and he didn’t even mean to. It was killing him to see her in pain and he didn’t know what to do. How was he going to keep her here? How were they going to get through this fight without her?

The front door opened again and Dawn’s scent drifted around him. Great. She was really going to tear into him now. “Faith, can I talk to Spike, alone?” She asked, as she stood on the other side of Spike.

Faith nodded. “He’s all yours,” she said, as she stood up. “For the record, we didn’t do anything.”

Spike bowed his head and sighed. “Dawn…” He could explain this Dawn. Nothing happened, so there was no reason to get upset. Right? After everything he had done to make amends with the people he loved, it was all falling apart. The pieces were just slipping through his fingers and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

“Spike, if you want to be with Faith, Buffy and I are going to L.A.” Spike looked up at her. “I thought you’d wanna know. You’re gonna lose me and Buffy forever if we leave. How could you do that to Buffy? Why would you move on to a different slayer right in front of her?”

He got to his feet and looked at the young girl that was just about his height. “I didn’t,” he answered, his eyes boring into Dawn’s. He wasn’t going to let Angel take his girl away over some misunderstanding. It wasn’t going to happen. Not if he had anything to say about it. “I don’t know what Buffy saw, or what she thinks she saw, but she is wrong. And no one is going anywhere.” With that he went inside and made his way upstairs to Buffy’s room.

He paused outside of her room, listening to her sniffles as she talked to Angel. They were making plans to leave soon, and it was all he could do not to burst into her room and beg her to stay. That wasn’t going to do it. He gently knocked on her door before opening it. She was sitting on her bed with her back against the headboard, her feet tucked underneath her. She was pale and he could tell from her heart beat that she was tired. Angel was holding her hand and she didn’t even have the strength to wrap her fingers around his. Or she had no desire to. He hoped she didn’t want to.

Angel looked up at Spike and gently got off of Buffy’s bed. “I’ll wait downstairs in case you want to come with me,” he said, leaving the room.

Spike closed the door and leaned against it. “Buffy.” He ached to go to her and wrap her up in his arms and tell her everything would be okay, but he knew that it wasn’t. He broke her heart and putting Buffy’s heart back together was no easy task. “I don’t know what you saw, but nothing is going on with Faith and I.”

“I saw you kiss her in the cemetery,” Buffy argued as she blinked away tears. “And then this morning you guys were all snuggly and flirty. Don’t tell me that that’s nothing. It looked like something to everyone else.”

He crossed his arms as he glared at her. “I didn’t kiss her,” he said. “And she didn’t kiss me either. We went out on patrol and that was it.” She thought he was kissing another girl? Had she totally lost her mind? He didn’t move on that easily to people. He still loved Buffy, but she apparently didn’t know that. He couldn’t understand how she could think he was going to move on. Did she not see it was killing him to see her fight her tears and not give her any comfort.

Her eyes drifted downward to stare at her comforter. “I saw you, Spike,” she whispered in a choked voice. “You didn’t even wait for me to come home last night and you just went out with her. And I saw you two in the cemetery. She was all over you.”

“Because she fell on me, Buffy,” he explained. “But that was it. She staked a vampire that was getting the better of me and that’s all you saw. She got off me and we patrolled. Nothing else happened.” He pushed himself off the door and made his way to her bed. He carefully set on the edge, not wanting to be too close to her. She might break his nose and maybe he deserved it, but he didn’t know. She didn’t look at him and she didn’t seem to be saying anything any time soon. He slid closer to her and reached his hand out to hers. “Are you gonna talk to me?”

Buffy took a deep breath. “I don’t know what to say to you,” she said softly. “Even if you didn’t kiss her, you didn’t push her off when she fell on you. You guys looked pretty cozy to me. And you were coupley this morning. And I was there. I heard the giggling and the whispering. It was like it didn’t matter that I was in the room.”

“I didn’t know how you felt, and you could have told me instead of running away,” he said, softly. “And I don’t want Angel to take you away from me.” He was so tired of watching her run away every time she had a problem. Why couldn’t she just face it and work it out? But he could see where he may have screwed up himself. Even if nothing happened on patrol with Faith, he was being a little flirty with her in the kitchen, which he didn’t think was a big deal. And he knew he couldn’t handle her leaving.

Buffy finally met his eyes and nothing could prepare him for what she said next. “I’ve never had to call Angel for anything. Never. That’s how bad you hurt me. I had to call him because I didn’t know what to do. I used to be able to go to you about anything and that blew up in my face,” she said, pushing her body out of bed and moving away from him. “I haven’t moved on like you have. I didn’t go to another man because I knew there was no one else like you. I knew I wasn’t gonna find someone better then you. I went on a date with the principle but it didn’t mean anything. I know Faith’s better then me. She’s ruined two of my relationships in the past and she almost killed my mother. I don’t know what I did to make you do this to me but its killing me. I’ve never felt anything like this,” she continued, as her shoulders started to shake. “Losing Angel, twice, Riley, my mom, coming back, you attacking me, none of those things hurt as much as this has. I know I made some mistakes last year and I hurt you but I’m sorry. Spike, please make this pain stop,” she said, sliding to the floor, sobbing softly.

Tears were running down Spike’s face as well at the pain he caused her. Half of what she had just said didn’t make too much sense to him, but he knew she was heart broken. Because of him. He went over and scooped her up into his arms and went back to bed. He took her place against the headboard and cradled her into his arms. “I’m so sorry, Buffy,” he said, rocking her back and forth. “I never meant to hurt you.” He never imagined that he could hurt her this bad. He hugged her closer to his body. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, Buffy. I love you so much. Please forgive me,” he whispered, burying his face in her hair. “I didn’t know.”

Buffy slid one of her arms around his waist. “It just hurt so badly,” she whimpered. “I never thought… I never imagined that I would lose you. Not to her.” She sniffled for a few moments, as her tears began to stop.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he whispered into her hair. “I promise.” He ran his hands under her shirt in a soothing gesture. He pressed soft kisses to her hair as he continued to rock her gently in his arms. He would never dream of leaving her, and not for another woman. “No other woman would ever compare to you, Buffy. Not Faith, not anyone. There is no one else for me.”

She shuddered and nodded against him. “Can you just hold me so I can sleep,” she said, closing her eyes.

Spike gently laid them down and he held her as she fell asleep instantly. He felt almost relieved knowing that she wouldnt be returning with Angel. He wiped a few of his own tears away as he ran a finger down her cheek softly. “I love you so much, Buffy,” he whispered to her sleeping form. He held her protectively in his arms and kissed her forehead. He would make it up to her. No matter what. He would never, ever, hurt her again.