My Soul to Take
Chapter 1 – Like Leonardo DiCaprio with Horns
Some demons are slimy and very disgusting, others are feral and hairy, but this one in particular was almost human. It was actually kind of cute, for a demon. Like a young Leonardo DiCaprio, except for, you know, the horns jutting out from its forehead. If Buffy was going to pick a demon to get snuggly with, this would be the one.

“So, Mr. Demon. Um…what are you in town for? Is it business or are you just enjoying the radiant beauty of the hellmouth?”

The demon just looked back at her, and if she didn’t know any better, she would swear he was trying not to laugh at her. He was also giving her the little half smile that guys give girls when they want to get away, and quick, but are just too polite to try it. Except it was a demon, so while Buffy wouldn’t usually tackle a guy down if he tried to walk away from her, she was fully prepared to do it to this cute-guy-demon because she was on instructions from Giles to find a certain demon, and she was pretty sure this was the one…

“So, Giles, what’s the what?”

Buffy sat on Giles’s table, which was piled with open books.

“Yeah, G-man, what kind of monsters are the scoobies up against this time? Cause it’s not like it’s a Wednesday night and it’s almost midnight and I have work in the morning, no siree! You can just take your time with your pacing and glasses cleaning and all, I don’t mind in the slightest!”, Xander said with a slight quiver in his voice, clearly antsy and wanting to escape to the refuge of his basement for a good night’s sleep.

“Xander, I am well aware that many of us have things to do, but this could very well be a matter of life and death.” Giles shot Xander a look that seemed closely related to Willow’s resolve face, and then he continued, “The ‘monsters’ aren’t the danger, per se, but it appears that these…Garlgans are more often than not controlled by a greater creature, and to summon them needs at least half a dozen demons and vampires to help with the ritual, so there are clearly a great number of demons involved.”
“So Buff goes and kills them, we all get to go home and then we meet up tomorrow morning with donuts and coffee for a little after-slay-chat, voila!”

“I do wish it was as easy as you make it appear, Xander, but these creatures can’t be killed with brute force. The only way to defeat them is to find out who’s controlling them, and undo the spell that is keeping the control over them. When we break the magic that is binding them to whomever, or whatever, is controlling them, they will simply disappear back into their own dimension.”

Buffy, who had been sitting quietly for the past few minutes, spoke up as soon as Giles had finished, “I’m guessing that’s going to be pretty hard-like high school chemistry hard. Do you think if we asked real nice the gargle monsters would just tell us who was controlling them?”

“Garlgans, Buffy, Garlgans. And, well, you see, that may be a tad difficult. The Garlgans are very aggressive, so the only situation where that would be possible would be if you somehow managed to physically hold it down.” Giles sighed, and took off his glasses, giving them a quick wipe clean and placing them back on his head,” And they travel in groups, so if you were to manage to restrain one, you would most likely have a couple dozen other ones to deal with. I think our first port of call would be to investigate the local demon bars and ask around. Try finding out who it is that summoned the Garlgans, rather than trying to slay them. Rushing into a fight with the Garlgans head on could be, potentially, extremely dangerous.”

Buffy hopped off the table, Willow, Xander and Anya following her actions and getting up from their own places around Giles’s living room before walking towards the door.

Giles hurried over, placing an arm against the wall in front of Buffy to halt her movements, “Maybe you should take Riley with you, Buffy. I just don’t want you getting hurt – you’re becoming increasingly careless these days, just remember what happened with that vampire a few weeks ago!”

“Giles, I’m fine!” Buffy replied forcefully, before pushing Giles’s arm back down, “Besides, Riley’s gone to visit his family in Iowa for the week, and everyone else is either busy or not strong enough. I promise I’ll be safe, don’t worry, it’ll give you wrinkles…well, more wrinkles.”

“I really would feel better if you would take someone else with you. Why don’t you go track down Spike? He’s can help if you run into any demons, and the chip will stop him from hurting you.”

“Spike?!? Really, Giles! As if the chip will stop him from finding some other way to kill me! I mean, what if he’s the one in charge of the demons!”

“I highly doubt that. He’s recent liaisons with us have cause him to become somewhat of a leper among the demon community, so I don’t think any of them would even help him with the ritual to summon the Garlgas. Please, Buffy. I would sleep better knowing you had someone to keep you safe. Spike can be quiet loyal when he puts his mind to it.”

“You mean when he gets paid.” Buffy grumbled under her breath.

“Okay,” she said, loader this time, “But only because you’re my watcher.”

Giles let a thankful smile slip onto his face and lead Buffy to the door. “Bye Giles.” She yelled as she joined her friends, who had been patiently waiting outside.

“Bye Giles” chorused the rest of the youths in front of him. He waved a goodbye in return, and then turned around, shutting the door to his apartment with a bang.

And that’s how Buffy had ended up with the demon she had now dubbed “The Leonardo DiCaprio Demon”. It wasn’t a gargle demon, or whatever it was called, but it very well could be one of the demons that had summoned them. All she was waiting for was Spike, who had disappeared almost half an hour ago after seeing some demon ho at Willies who he apparently ‘needed to talk to’. As if! He and demon-ho were probably going at it right now, while Buffy was stuck waiting for him to come back and trying to fill in the awkward silence between her and Leonardo DiCaprio demon.

She wasn’t going to try to talk to him again, that had caused enough embarrassment for one day. Maybe she could offer to buy him a drink? But maybe that would seem a bit of a seedy thing for a slayer to do, buying a demon a drink in a demon bar. There was a demon sitting on the other side of the bar that seemed familiar, so if she just called him over here, he and Leonardo DiCaprio demon could talk and…no, that was pretty stupid. Just as Buffy was seriously considering pretending her phone was ringing, Spike walked back into the bar through the door the led to the alley. He wore a big, dumb grin on his face and had a sparkly bracelet in his hand, along with a couple of wads of cash and stake that he had obviously stolen from her at some point. He clearly had no appreciation for how hard it was to make those, it wasn’t like they sold stakes in the supermarket.

He spotted Buffy and strutted over to her, there really was no other way to describe how he was walking. Walking exactly how he acted; confident and completely full of himself.

“Where the hell were you?!” she shouted at him, shoving him in the chest for extra emphasis. If he thought he could just disappear for almost forty five minutes to go steal some demon girls stuff while she had to wait here for him with Leonardo DiCaprio Demon, then he had another thing coming!

“Bloody hell, slayer! Watch the shirt, it’s new.”

“Oh, please! It’s the same as every other shirt you own.”

“Slayer!” he gasped “Ouch, that hurts right here” he said, putting his clenched fist above his heart with a mock-pained expression on his face, “Because I just try so hard to make my wardrobe pleasing for you!”

“Just cut the crap Spike! What did you think you were doing, leaving me here like that? You can’t just walk off to go and mack on some demon ho bag,” she poked him in the chest again, “and steal her stuff” she said, knocking his loot from out of his hands, “while I babysit some demon!” And with that said, she grabbed Spike by his leather jacket and dragged him over to Leonardo DiCaprio demon. “So, what’ve you got to say for yourself mister?”

The sight of Spike, sprawled out on the bar stool that he had promptly sat down on when she had let go of him, ticked her off to no extent. He was grinning at her, not even caring that she was pissed at him. Did he not get that she was seriously considering killing him? Maybe she should tell him, just to make sure he knew, “I’m seriously considering killing you, Spike!”

“Bollocks. I know you, Slayer. You white-hats have some problem with killing helpless creatures, and now that I’m helpless there’s not a think you can do to me! Besides, I wasn’t shagging that girl and I didn’t steal her stuff.”

That really did confuse her. Because really, what else could he have been doing for the past three quarters of an hour while he was in an alley with a not completely unattractive demon girl?

“So what were you doing?”

“Well,” he stretched out the word and made a little ticking noise with his tongue, “if you’d actually bothered to ask me in the first place, slayer, I would’ve told you. But now…I don’t know. It feels like the moments past.”

“Spike.” She said, the ‘tell me or be staked’ warning clear in her voice.

“Say pretty please slayer.”

“Why? Why me, God?” she whispered, her head raised to the ceiling, “Alright, prettypleasetellmespike,” she rushed out the words, preferring to get it over and done with.

“Sorry, Slayer, didn’t quiet here that.”

“Pretty please tell me, Spike.” She managed to grind out, her teeth literally scraping together.

“Bloody hell, Slayer! That gives me tingles in all the right places! Say it again, but call me…master.”

Buffy leapt at him and punched him straight in the nose, and then again in the stomach “Argh!” she shouted, and then let out an unintelligible string of curses, still punching him.

She was interrupted when Leonardo DiCaprio Demon spoke, “Um, you guys maybe want to stop fighting and tell me what you needed me for?”

“No!” they shouted, simultaneously, making Leonardo DiCaprio demon shrink back into his seat.

Buffy raised her fist and her eyebrow, silently making a threat.

Spike sighed, clearly resigning to the fact that the Slayer was past the fun quipping stage, and was clearly into the tell me or die stage, “Look, her name’s Rosemary and she’s a darn good witch. I was just getting this off her” he said, bending down to pick up the bracelet and holding it up in front of her, “to protect me against any demons that might want to beat me up. I know it’s all girly and whatnot, which is why I have all this cash. I wanted a refund because I’m not bloody well going to be walking around with this on my wrist! So she says sure, gives me my money back and says she’ll enchant me a new one, and that in the mean time I can use this one. Hopefully the new one will be a bit more manly, because really, I am all man.” He said, curling his tongue behind her teeth and shoving his fingers in the belt loops of his pants. He lent down and picked up the other items that Buffy had knocked out of his grasp. He shoved the money in his pocket and held the stake up in front of his eyes, contemplating it, “Would be bloody dangerous carrying this around.” He then turned to face her, “Was only carrying it around to defend myself if one of these vamps here were to jump me.” He paused. “In the bad way, I mean”, and again with the tongue curling.

With that, he lifted the stake and snapped it clean in half before leaning over the bar to chuck it in the bin that was conveniently placed there. Buffy watched in the upmost horror as Spike chucked what would’ve been a good few hours work of carving onto the dirty pile of trash.

“Oh, you are so dead!”

All he could was stand there like a deer in the head lights as she ranted at him about the environment and how hard she worked, “What the bloody hell did I do wrong this time, woman?!”

And then she glared a glare that would dust a thousand vamps. “I hate you, Spike.”

“Feeling’s mutual, pet. Feeling’s mutual.”

Chapter 2 – Bondage Fun


“Buffy! It’s five-thirty in the morning, what on earth possessed you to come storming into my place when every other human being in this god forbidden country is still sleeping!” Giles shouted, clearly angry from being woken from his sleep. He looked pretty ridiculous to Buffy, standing there wearing a pair of red and green tartan boxers and sporting a major case of bed hair…although, as Willow had pointed out to Buffy numerous times, he was in pretty good shape for an older guy. Buffy finished her visual analysis of him and ignored his words as she barreled past him, an unconscious Leonardo DiCaprio Demon in one hand and Spike in the other. Giles let out one of his patented British sighs and closed his bulky, metal door. When he turned around, Buffy was triumphantly pulling some rope out of one of Giles’s many cupboards and striding toward the two demons, intent clear in her eyes.

“Buffy, if you don’t mind me asking, why is there a demon in my apartment who…looks startlingly familiar. I think I’ve seen this demon in one of my texts! Do you mind asking him what demon he is?”
“Giles.” Buffy said, one eyebrow quirked up, “He’s right there, you ask him! Except… I guess you can’t cause he’s having a slight case of unconsciousness at the moment. I think he’s one of the evil demons who summoned the gargle things.”

“Garlgans, Buffy.” Giles responded almost sub-consciously as he flicked through what looked like a very heavy book in his arms.

Buffy finished tying up the Leonardo DiCaprio demon and spotted another length of rope on the ground. She grinned to herself and picked it up before skipping over to Spike and manhandling him into a chair. Buffy was just about to start tying Spike up, but he had other ideas and started to buck and squirm as she struggled to hold him down, “Rupes! You’ve gotta do something! She’s tying an innocent vamp up.”, he then turned to speak to Buffy, “I was bloody well helping you, and this is the kind of treatment I get. I swear…why the bloody hell are you sitting on me now?!?!”

“To hold you down while I tie you up. Duh.” Buffy said grinning and winding the rope around the vampire she was now sitting on.

“Bollocks. Everyone in this town is a complete loon! And I know loony when I see it.”

“Puh-lease, Spike! None of us could ever be as crazy as your nutcase of an ex-girlfriend.” Buffy grinned wickedly and leaned into him to tighten the rope which was securing the vampire, “I’m just extra cautious when it comes to certain vampires who I don’t exactly trust.”

“Aha!” Giles exclaimed from the corner of the room.

The two blonds didn’t pay him the slightest attention and just continued verbally sparring.

“You know, I’m beginning to think all that bleach you use is affecting your mental capacity. Or were you always this stupid.”

“Stupid! As if, slayer. I’m not the one who didn’t know how to work the microwave.”

“It was new! Anyway, you should be grateful – I was heating up your blood!”

“I didn’t ask you to take in a notorious killer and feed him blood, now did I?”

“Well, actually Spike, you did. You turned up at my doorstep and you begged for help. That’s pretty pathetic, even for you.”

“’Even for me’?! Bloody hell, slayer, hurt a man’s ego why don’t you!”

“I said, AHA!” Giles raised his voice and the blonde duo stopped at once, looking at him, stunned.

“Ah, yes, ah…I apologize for raising my voice, Buffy.” As strange as the sight of bashful Giles was, Buffy smiled a little at the sweet nature of the older man.

“What about me, Ripper? Don’t I get an apology?” Spike whined from his residence in one of Giles’s antique, wooden chairs.

“No.” Giles said bluntly, but not aggressively.

“So, Giles, that ‘aha!’? What was that for?”

“Oh, yes. Well, I found out what type of demon this is” he said, taking his glasses of his head and pointing the tip of them at Leonardo DiCaprio demon. Buffy and Spikes attention was drawn to the demon which they had forgotten amongst their verbal fighting. “It appears to be a Rebus demon. They’re very intelligent and developed. They’re almost human, and you can see how closely this particular Rebus demon is to the physical make up of humans. Now, while they are very almost human, they’re still very dangerous because of the lack of a soul. They completely lack a moral compass, and such, have the intelligence of a human with the uncaring nature of a demon, which is a very volatile combination. Now Buffy, what makes you think he was part of the ritual to summon the Garlgans?”

“Well, I went to Willies to get information, like you told me to,” she stopped, giving Giles a pointed look, “And Willy told me that he had heard that a bunch of demons had a little gathering a few weeks ago. I asked him if any of them were in the bar at the moment and he pointed out this guy. So, here he is!”

“All there is to do, really, is to wait until the Rebus returns to consciousness and we can interrogate it.” Giles sat down on his couch tilted his head back, eyes closed as he tried to lull himself back into the realm of sleep. Buffy got up, grabbed her previously discarded coat and headed to Giles’s door, and just as she was about to walk out of the apartment, Spike’s voice forced her back a few steps, “Bloody hell, slayer. You’re just going to leave me tied up here while Rupert has a nap and you head out for a walk?!”

“Well, yeah.” She said, “Someone has to watch the demon. I’ve been up all night and I’m in serious need of a caffeinated beverage. You, on the other hand, are a vampire who is used to staying up all hours of the night and shouldn’t have a problem with staying awake and making sure that Leonardo DiCaprio demon doesn’t escape.”

Spike sighed and closed his eyes in aggravation, before suddenly opening them again and looking at Buffy oddly, “What does Leonardo DiCaprio have to do with anything?”

“Did I say Leonardo DiCaprio? I meant to say r…re…ret…rel, ergh, whatever the name of the demon was.” Spike continued looking at her funny, “What?!” she said defensively, “Leonardo DiCaprio demon is so much easier to remember than whatever that other name was. Besides, how can you look at that demon and tell me he doesn’t look like Leonardo DiCaprio?”

Spike tilted his head towards the other demon in the room and thought for a minute. “Well, for one thing, there are these horns…”

Buffy rolled her eyes and swept out of the room, sending Spike one more warning glare before she closed the door.



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“Hey, Giles.” Buffy said as she walked back into her watchers apartment, large mocha with extra foam in one hand and a croissant in the other. “How’s the whole demon thing goi…” Her voice trailed off as she saw the sight before her. Giles was tied to the chair where Spike had once been, and the chair had fallen on its side. Giles’s head was developing an impressive bruise and he had one solid scratch down his arm. Buffy dumped her breakfast and ran towards him, the worry clear in her eyes.

Giles opened his eyes to a panicked, blonde slayer in front of his nose. The moment she had spotted him coming back to consciousness, she had lent down to his face to examine him as he woke. “How many fingers am I holding up, Giles?” she said, her index and middle finger held up a few inches from his face.

“Buffy, I am perfectly fine. Now please, would you mind moving? You’re crowding me.” He said, letting his head fall back against the floor.

“Giles, I am not letting you move until you tell me how many fingers I’m holding up.” She said, shoving her fingers back in his face again.

“You’re holding up two, happy?”

“Very” she said, and with a sweet smile she went to work untying him and helping him get off the ground. “Hmm,” she said, inspecting his wounds, “I’m going to go get some gauze and antiseptic – don’t move! Wouldn’t want a badly injured watcher on our hands, now would we?” She tossed a smile over her shoulder and walked out of the room in search of medical supplies.

When she returned not five minutes later, Giles was lying across the couch and poking gingerly at his wounds. “Stop touching them,” Buffy demanded, swatting his hand away, “You’re only going to make it worse. Now, shove your arm out.”

Giles poked his arm out in front of him and Buffy sat down with the gauze and antiseptic. She examined Giles’s wound closely before pouring antiseptic all over it and winding the gauze around it.

“I think you’re going to need some ice for your head. You got any?” Giles shook his head at her question. “Okay, I’ll grab you a bag of peas from the freezer, that’ll do.” Buffy walked off and Giles could hear her opening the door of his freezer and closing it again. She walked back into the room and gave Giles the bag of frozen peas she was holding. Giles took it thankfully and placed it against the bruise on his head, hissing slightly when he started to feel the cold.

“So…”Buffy drew out, “What happened here? I mean, I leave for 10 minutes and when I come back Spike and the demon are missing and you’re unconscious and tied to a chair. You know, you really get knocked out a lot – it can’t be healthy”

“Ah, yes. I’m quite aware of that, but it can’t really be helped.” Giles said, “And I know how it must look, but I assure you even if you were here you couldn’t have really helped. You see, the Rebus demon had some sort of mystical jewel in its possession and while I was resting the demon somehow activated it. I awoke tied to the chair and watching the Rebus demon using the crystal to knock Spike out and run out of the house with him. I wonder what the gem was. There should be some mention of it a text somewhere – it had a very unique appearance, and didn’t seem like a usual run of the mill mystical crystal.”

‘Rhyme-y.’ Buffy thought.

“Okay! That’s great. You can research, get the rest of the scoobies around and find out what the deal is with this guys magic bling.”

“That’s sounds good. You can call up Willow, Xander and Anya and then you can start researching by yourself until they get here.”

Giles looked at Buffy, only to find she was staring at him aghast, “Giles, you can’t make me do the research girl thing! Can’t I go out and look for demon guy and Spike?”

Giles just shook his heads and pointed to a book. Buffy sat down with a sigh, begrudgingly opening it to a random page and reading.