1

Angel sighed, staring out at the setting sun as he sat behind the protective glass of his office window. He was still amazed by it all. This time last year, even a glimpse of a ray of sunlight would have sent him scurrying for shelter. But now, he was able to just stand and soak up the rays without fearing that he would burst into flames. He knew that the others thought him silly for his little tradition of watching each sunrise and sunset, but they hadn’t gone without the sun for over two hundred years like he had. If they had, they would know what he was feeling.

“Amazing isn’t it?” Spike asked, standing behind his grandsire, also entranced by the setting sun. “Still gets you every time.”
“What do you want Spike?” Angel asked, weary of the younger vampire’s presence. Even though Spike has been of some assistance in the past few months, he was still on guard. Spike was a wildcard in Angel’s eyes. Yes, he did help save the world and was supposedly working with the white hats now…but for how long will this last? When will Spike begin to feel restless again, and would the soul be enough to keep him in line?

“To talk. Wes told me about Connor. Just wanted to know why you didn’t tell me that you had a kid,” Spike tried to keep the hurt out of his voice. He didn’t want Angel to know that he felt left out of the loop on this development. He didn’t want him to know how much his trust really meant to him…almost as much as Buffy’s.

“Didn’t think it was any of your business.”

“Not any of my business? Bloody hell Peaches! How can your having a kid not be my business?! It most certainly is!”

Angel got out of his chair, suppressing the demon that was roaring in rage at this invasion of privacy. He glared at Spike, wanting to through the glass into the bright sunlight beyond, destroying him instantly. But he remained in the spot he was standing, unable to even do that to his childe. There was so much tortured history between them that Angel didn’t even dare tell Spike the truth about their ties. A truth that would explain so many things, like why Angel could never bring himself to stake the platinum vampire and why Spike was always finding himself drawn to Angel’s side. No matter how bad the tension. Angel didn’t dare tell Spike that Drucilla had botched the job of turning him, so Angel was forced to take over and sired his second vampire, much to Darla’s dismay and Drucilla’s delight. Jealous, Darla had Drucilla put it in Spike’s head that her attempt was successful. Angel shook his head. This wasn’t the time to reveal startling secrets; he already had the reappearance of Connor to deal with.

“Why? Why do you care Spike? You hate my guts, remember? I didn’t tell you about Connor because it was my business, not yours and not Buffy’s. Yes, he’s my son. Yes, I gave him up so he could have a happy life! What’s it to you? Why should you be so hurt that I didn’t tell you?”

“Because you’re my bloody sire you poof! That’s why! Yes, I remember everything. I have for a few years now! You sired me, not Dru, therefore your having a son is my business!” Spike shouted his voice full of hurt and anger. He hadn’t meant for this to turn into what he remembered as the truth. He hadn’t meant for this confrontation to be about him at all. He just wanted Angel to tell him what really happened. Who was Connor and why did Angel give him up? Was the kid a vampire? Another childe made for a higher purpose? Or was he a miracle child. Born to a broody vampire with a soul?

“What? You…remember…Spike…I…you have to understand…”

“What? You didn’t want to acknowledge me? That you put it all on Dru? Well I guess I can understand that. I mean…I was an even bigger poof when I was alive. It does explain a lot. Your willingness to take me under your wing and teach me everything you knew about being a vampire…this connection that keeps us drawn to one another…,” Spike sighed, trying to keep an air of indifference when in reality, he felt as if he was falling apart. Angelus was his sire and he hadn’t even cared enough to claim him. Instead, he had just pawned him off on an insane Drucilla. Teaching him only enough to survive without the help of a fully sane sire.

“Spike…it wasn’t because I was ashamed. You were supposed to be Drucilla’s childe in the first place. She had mucked it up, so I had no choice…”

“You could have let me die.”

“Dru wanted you. If I had let you die…there would have been no living with her. Plus…Darla wasn’t happy. She had wanted to let you die, but I disobeyed her and she had never forgiven me for that. So she forced me to have Dru put you under a thrall that made you believe that she had sired you and not me. I guess it wore off.” Angel turned away from his childe, not daring to let how much this confession was hurting him. He had always cared about Spike and felt responsible for him. That had never changed, even when he had gotten the soul. When Spike had first showed up in Sunnydale, Angel was scared. The platinum blond was everything he had once been as Angelus. He was afraid of what he would do to not only Buffy, but to him as well. But then…Spike began to change. He began to become more and more like his human self, forcing his way back into Angel’s life and now his heart. Now here he was, confessing everything, hoping that his Childe would understand.

“Spike…I know I messed up with you. I should have staked Darla and claimed you as my childe anyway. You deserved so much better. You have every right to hate me right now. You really do…but please…don’t take this out on Connor. I know you feel angry and betrayed…”

Spike rolled his eyes in exasperation. Of course, Angel refused to believe that he had changed. He was no longer that immature, insensitive, creature that he had once been. Yeah, a few years back, before the chip and Buffy, he would have gone and hunted this Connor kid down and ripped out his throat, just for having Angel’s favor. But now…he just felt bad for the kid…and for Angel. He felt bad for Angel most of all. He had lost everything. His vampire family, Buffy, Cordillea, Fred, and this Connor kid. He must feel so alone right now. Maybe he didn’t have to feel that way. Maybe it was time to share his true feelings with his sire. He cleared his throat and laid a steady hand on Angel’s slumped shoulders. “Listen. I don’t plan to even go near the kid. I just wanted some answers. That’s all. Look, I know right now that you feel like you’re all alone in the world…but you’re not. You do have a family still. A son sort to speak. I may not be Connor, and I may not be a teenager, but hey. We’re still family. You and I. You’ve been there for me the best way you could at the time and I appreciate it.”

Angel frowned, as a tiny ray of hope seemed to light up in his soul. He looked into Spike’s eyes, again realizing just how much he cared and how he hated all the bickering and fighting. He wanted things to be different, so much. He wanted to teach Spike the ropes of having a soul and fighting the good fight. He wanted to show Spike how to control his demon more. He wanted so many things, and they had always seemed out of reach. But now, with Spike here talking about being family and not being alone…maybe there was a chance to do all of that. Maybe Angel wouldn’t be so alone anymore. “Spike…what are you trying to say here?”

“We’re sire and childe, Angel. Don’t you think it’s about time we start acting like it? Goodness knows that I have a lot more to learn about having this soul. Buffy helped…but she’s not you. What I’m trying to say here is that I need my sire. My real one. So how ‘bout it? You teach me all I need to know and I’ll try not to be so annoying anymore.”

The tiny ray of hope turned into a full beam, dispelling all the gloom and depression that had tied Angel’s soul to this plane of reality. Angel was just about to turn around and accept Spike’s offer when he felt the tethers of the soul loosen and the all familiar pain grip him, causing him to collapse to his knees.

“Bloody hell! Angel, what is it mate?” Spike bent down next to Angel, placing a steady hand on his back. He had a sinking feeling what this was about; he was just hoping that he was wrong. When he saw the fading troubled gaze, he knew that he was right.

One thought came to Angel’s mind as he felt the malevolence come upon him. He knew who Angelus’s first victim would be. The only one who could protect her was his childe. “…Buffy…protect…” He never finished that thought. A deep, evil laugh escaped as the soul departed. Angelus was back and all he could think of was enjoying some slayer blood.

“Hello boy. I’m back,” was the last thing Spike heard as a fist slammed into his face, knocking him unconscious.

2

“Spike,” Buffy’s voice floated through the light fog that surrounded him. Spike lifted his head to see her, beautiful and glowing in a sleek white gown. Her arms stretched out towards him, begging him to come and get lost in their soft embrace. But he couldn’t move, no matter how hard he tried. He struggled and strained against whatever was restraining him, but his body simply refused to move an inch.

“Buffy!” Spike jerked awake, a bit disoriented as the light filtered into the room. He soon realized that it had been a dream. Buffy hadn’t really been there. She was out there in the real world somewhere, enjoying the normal life that she had always wanted.

“Bloody hell,” Spike cursed as he realized that he was tied up to the leather chair behind Angel’s desk. Not only was he tied up, but he was tied tight. Only one person could be responsible for this. “Angel!”

“I see you’re awake,” Angel stepped into Spike’s line of vision. His smile was cruel and malicious. Remorse and sorrow were now absent from his eyes, they were now only full of anger, hate, and the darkness that Spike had only seen in the vampire that had stolen Dru from him.

“Angelus,” the younger vampire growled, vamping out himself.

“Give ole Spike a prize,” Angelus grinned, approaching his prisoner. “I must say Spike…I’m surprised that you were the one to release me. But then again…you have always been a screw up and a disappointment. Just ask Drusilla.”

“Shut up,” Spike growled, struggling to get free from his ropes. He was going to rip Angelus apart when he got free. Just on principle alone.

“Not to mention Buffy. Tell me Spike, how does it feel to be the substitute for the real thing? Huh? Tell me, what did you do when the slayer yelled out my name instead of yours in the heat of passion? Did you want to rip that lovely throat out? Or did you do what you do best? Did you crawl into a dark corner and bawl like a baby?”

Spike’s angry roar was his only answer as the struggle against the ropes increased. He was going to do more then rip Angelus from limb to limb, he was going to gut him, then hang him out in the sun to fry.

“Got to control that temper. Hey, want to hear my plan? It's genius really. Something that you, William the Bloody, slayer of slayers can appreciate,” Angelus knelt down to be face to face with his childe. “I’m going after a slayer. Not just any slayer either. I am going after the slayer. I’m going after Buffy.”

“You bloody pillock, you go anywhere near her and I’ll rip your throat out! I’ll send you back to hell and this time you’ll stay there!” Spike growled.

Angelus just laughed as he got to his feet. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep Spike. It doesn’t become you. Hey, don’t be so put out. I’ll bring you back her body,” Angelus smirked one last time before sauntering out of the room, leaving Spike tied to the chair.

“Angelus! Come back here you bastard! Just wait until I get out of these ropes! I’ll rip you in two! I’ll tear your throat out if you go ten feet of Buffy! I swear I will!” Spike kept yelling, not caring if his sire was out of earshot or not.

“What in the…Spike? Why are you tied up? Where’s Angel?” Wes entered. He had heard Spike’s threats from his office and was worried that Angel and Spike were at their constant bickering once again.  
He had not expected to find Spike bound to a chair and Angel absent all
together. 

“Wes, quick! Untie me! I have to get to Buffy right away!”

“What? Why? Where’s Angel?” Wes knelt to untie the ropes, curious about what had just taken place and what Angel was up to now.

“Angelus is back! Somehow Angel got a happy and reverted back to his old ways,” Spike rubbed his sore wrists. “He’s going after Buffy. He’s going to kill her if we don’t get to her first.”

“Dear lord,” Wes gasped and looked more closely at the vampire. “Are you sure?”
“Bloody well positive! Giles, we have to call Giles! I need to know where she is if I’m going to protect her!”

“I’ll call,” Wes picked up Angel’s phone and hit speed dial. After a few minutes, Wes had Giles on the other line. “It’s of the utmost importance that we know where Buffy is…yes, we’re still in charge of Wolfram and Hart. Now Rupert…if you’d just listen…”

“Bloody hell, let me have a go at it,” Spike took the phone from Wes, getting more and more impatient by the minute. The longer they wasted time like, the sooner Angelus got to Buffy. “Listen here Ripper, Angelus is back and he’s going after the slayer. Now you can be nice and tell me where Buffy is, so I can protect her, or I come to England and beat it out of you; but either way, you will tell me where Buffy is. One way or another.”

“Spike?” Disbelief was clear in the watcher’s voice. Giles hadn’t been expecting this at all. 
Spike had died along with Sunnydale.  There was no way he could have
survived the collapse.  What was he doing talking to him over the phone.

“Yes, it’s really me, Ripper. Now, are you going to tell me where Buffy is or not?”

“How…how did you come back? When did you come back?”

“Story for another time. Right now, I need to know where Buffy is. Angelus is already on his way…”

“Oh, right. Of course,” Giles sighed, pushing away his shock.  He
can find out the details of Spike's return later.  Right now, getting to
Buffy took top priority.   “Do you have a pen and paper?”

“Right here,” Spike grabbed what he needed from Angel’s desk. Quickly, he jotted down Buffy’s address. “Do me a favor, will you? Call Buffy and warn her about Angelus. Tell her to keep as low of a profile as possible.”

“Yes. I will do that. Would you also want me to tell her that you’re back as well?”

“No. It’s best if I told her myself,” Spike quickly refused the offer. Yes, it would be easier if Giles just told her, but after they had left things in Sunnydale…the news had to come from him. “Just tell her that help is on the way.”

“Spike, before you hang up…I’d like to apologize. My behavior the last month in Sunnydale was inexcusable…”

“You were just trying to protect her. I probably would have done the same thing.”

“But still…” Giles began, feeling the need to be express his guilt.

“Rupert, forget about it. Just do as I ask and we’ll call it even,” Spike sighed, trying to be as patient as possible.

“Oh. Ok, very well the. I’m off to call Buffy now.”

“Take care,” Spike hung up the phone before Giles could reply. To be honest, the apology had surprised him. He hadn’t been expecting it, but it was nice to hear. He would have talked to Giles a bit longer, but time was of the essence. There was no time for small talk. He had to get to Buffy fast.

“What do we do now?” Wes asked, looking at Spike quizzically.

Spike looked out the window, steely determination in his gaze. He knew exactly what to do next. It was the only thing that he could do. “Fire up the jet and rally the team…or rather what’s left of the team together. We’re going to the hell mouth.”

Wes nodded and left Spike alone to his churning thoughts. He was going to see her again. Spike was both excited and nervous. The last time they had been together, she had told him that she had loved him; but he had denied her claim, fearing that she wouldn’t have left him if he had accepted her words as truth. Now he was back and hadn’t bothered to contact her. Yeah, that was out of fear of rejection and the reluctance to interrupt her normal life, but would she understand that, or would she stake him first and ask questions later?

There was also the matter of Angel. His true sire.
In order to protect Buffy he may have to stake Angel himself. In fact, he was
almost sure of it. Sure, Buffy could do it herself, but killing Angel the first
time had nearly destroyed her. Spike was not going to let her go through that
again. Sure, that would leave him with out a true sire once again, but she was
so much more important to him then that.

Spike found it somewhat ironic really. Just when he had thought that they could work out their differences, Angel had to go lose his soddin soul once again. Shaking his head, feeling somewhat disappointed, Spike headed for his apartment to prepare for the flight to Cleveland, Ohio.

3

Buffy stretched her sore muscles as she returned from one of the few training classes that she taught along side Faith and Robin Woods. This session had been particularly grueling with two of the girls arguing constantly and another girl who liked giving her a hard time. On days like this, Buffy often wondered why she had left Rome at all. Dawn had been happy there, and she had been almost happy herself. She was free from being the one and only slayer. No more having to stop apocalypses and fighting a never ending stream of monsters. Yet there had been something missing. Something that kept Buffy miserable.

At first, she had thought it was the lack of slayage, so she had come to Cleveland and accepted Robin’s offer to help train the ever-growing number of slayers. However, that hadn’t worked for long. Buffy was still depressed, more then ever before. It was now obvious that the only thing that would make her happy was the one thing forever out of her reach.

“Buffy!” a girl with long ebony hair waved, standing in front of the door leading into Buffy’s apartment.

“Paige? What are you doing here?” Buffy greeted the woman that was now Willow’s new love interest. Buffy did not know what had happened with Kennedy. The brown-haired woman was long gone by time she had arrived in Cleveland and Willow had declined any questions asked. This was fine with Buffy. She had not liked Kennedy all that much and Paige seemed to be good for Willow. She was a fellow witch and seemed to understand and accept for Willow for who she was. She also made the red head happier then Buffy has seen her in a long time.

“Hi Buffy,” Paige stopped her continuous pacing. She forced a worried smile and rushed over to her friend. “I’ve been waiting for you. I have to warn you about your aura.”

Buffy frowned. One of Paige’s strong points were reading people’s auras and from that their possible future. “You’ve read my aura? What did it say?”

“I saw darkness and lots of it. Buffy, I saw a return of old enemies. I fear that your life may be in danger.”

Buffy sighed. She had told Paige a number of times about life as a slayer. Slayers were always in danger, yet it did not always mean that they were going to die…or remain dead for that matter. Therefore, there was no point in reading her aura. Of course, Paige had not listened and was now upset over whatever she had seen.

“Paige…we’ve had this discussion before. My life is always in danger. I am a vampire slayer, remember? Some big bad will always be gunning for me,” Buffy squeezed her friend’s shoulder, ignoring the twinge of sorrow at the familiar phrase. A few hours has since she had last thought about Spike. A record for her, but now that was down the drain as he filled her thoughts once again. “Look, don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I can take care of myself. Go home and get some sleep…unless you’re here to see Willow.”

“No, no. I was here to see you and now that I have and you’re not worried, I’ll just go on home,” Paige shyly smiled as she backed away, feeling a bit foolish for her needless concern. Buffy was fine. That was obvious and she was right. Constant danger was a part of her life and there was no need for alarm. It was best to just go home and probably stay there. “Night Buffy.”

“Bye Paige. Be careful out there,” Buffy watched her friend exit the building. Sighing sadly, Buffy entered the apartment, ready to dive into a nice, warm bubble bath when the phone began to ring. Sighing Buffy picked it up, expecting the caller to be another telemarketer begging for a sale. “Listen, I don’t want any!”

“Don’t want any what?” Giles asked, his voice a bit hurt and confused.

“Oh Giles, I’m sorry. I thought that you were another telemarketer wanting to sell me another Omelet buster,” Buffy blushed, beginning to relax now that she knew that no one was going to try to sell her anything.

It has been a long time since she had last spoken to her watcher. Six months to be exact. She had not meant to lose touch, but between moving to Europe and settling into life here on the hell mouth, there was not enough time to make social calls. Now that everything has settled down, Buffy wanted to catch up with the man that she thought of as her surrogate father.

“Oh. I see. Buffy…I have to tell you something of the utmost importance…but I do think that you should set down first.

Buffy sighed. Of course. His call would have to be about business. Calling to say hello was way beyond Giles. No, he only wanted to call her when an apocalypse was pending. She hated to say it, but he was becoming another Angel. “Gee Giles, it’s good to know that you care to call because you actually want to, not because you want me to fight something,” She hated the bitterness that dripped from her voice, but she couldn’t help it. She had wanted a simple social call from him, something to let her know that she was a lot more then his slayer. Obviously, that was never going to happen. Damn Giles for being so…British.

“Buffy, please. This is important,” Giles pinched the bridge of his nose, not really prepared to deal with another emotional conversation with his slayer. It seemed like that was all they ever had these days. He would call about the slayers, she’d get sarcastic, and they both would hang up with her feeling hurt and angry and him feeling lost and frustrated. He just did not have time for all that right now. It was a matter of her life being on the line.

“Isn’t it always?”

“Buffy…it’s Angel. Really, do set down,” Giles sighed.

“I’m setting,” she lied, walking over to her desk and looking through the contents, hoping not to sound too bored. “What about Angel?”

“He’s lost his soul again.”

“Oh? Is that all? Well, I’ll just have Willow whip up another one of those thesibian orbs and get it back,” Buffy sighed, shuffling through papers and books just to come to an abrupt stop when she came across silver lighter. She picked it up and examined it carefully. She had forgotten that she had it…the only piece of evidence that Spike had ever existed. She could still see him in her mind’s eye. Shoulders straight and confident, his eyes full of mischief as he lit up one of those horrible cigarettes that he loved so much. The silver would glint in the moonlight as he lifted it up to the stick that was deadly to everyone else but him.

“Buffy…it’s not that simple. Angelus has a goal this time. He’s out to kill a slayer this time. He’s out to kill you.”

“Well I guess we better have Willow do that spell then.”
“It’s not that simple. We need an orb of Thesulah and it will take a while to acquire one. In the meantime…Angelus is free and can get to you anytime he wants.”

“Shit. This is all I need right now. Do you think that I’ll have to kill him again?” She all of a sudden felt sick. To kill Angelus, she would have to kill Angel. Which was something she could not do. She had done it once before and it had nearly destroyed her. She could not go through that again. “Giles…I…I can’t go through this again. I just can’t. Not after Sunnydale and losing Spike. If I have to kill Angel…” She fought hard against the tears that threatened to overcome her suddenly, but they fell anyway. It felt as if her world was coming apart. First Spike died and now Angel may be lost to her as well.

“Buffy…listen to me. You are not alone in this. Help is on the way. Just keep a low profile for right now,” Giles’s voice softened. He hated how lost and dejected she sounded. He would do anything to be by her side right now, offering the comfort that she so badly needed.

“Help? From who? Who, except for Faith and me are strong enough to go against Angelus? That guy Gunn or Lorne? No, call L.A. and tell them that I have it covered.

“Buffy, I’m sure that they’d be able to…”

“Giles, just do as I say. Please. The last thing I need is for a group of his friends here, getting in the way.”

Giles sighed in frustration. He hated when Buffy got so stubborn that she would not listen to reason. He feared it would be stubbornness got her killed. This situation was going to call for desperate measures. Spike was just going to have to live with it.

“It’s not just a group of Angel’s friends, Buffy. It’s Spike.”

She grew unusually quiet at the mention of his name. Only the soft whisper of her breath let Giles know that she was still on the line.

“What did you say?” Buffy blinked back an unshed tear as she held on tightly to the lighter, as if it was the only think keeping her bound to the real world. “What about Spike?”

Giles sighed again, suddenly feeling very tired, and very old. “He’s on his way to Cleveland to help with Angelus.”

Buffy shook her head. What Giles was telling her was impossible. Spike couldn’t be on his way to Cleveland. He was dead. He had perished in the destruction of Sunnydale. She was sure he had…there was no way he could have survived. “Giles…Spike can’t come to Cleveland. He’s…”

“Back. I don’t know the details, he did not go into it with me, in fact, and I am not even supposed to be telling you this. But desperate times call for desperate measures.”

“But…are you sure? Are you absolutely positive that it was really Spike?” Buffy held back the ray of hope that threatened to shoot through her heart. If what Giles was saying were true...it would change everything. She’d have a real chance at happiness once again. However, if it was just a trick…some idea cooked up by a minion of Angelus himself…she didn’t think she’d be able to survive the disappointment.

“I’d know that cocky accent anywhere. It was Spike. It really was.”

Buffy nodded, blinking away the tears that were insisting on escaping. Spike was back and coming to her aid. This was something that she had dreamed of for the past year. Was this really happening, or was it just another dream? Would she find herself awaking to another bitter disappointment?

“Buffy? Are you still there?” Giles asked, worried by Buffy’s silence. He knew that Buffy had developed some strong feelings for the English vampire and was devastated by the events of Sunnydale’s collapse.

“I’m here. Listen Giles, I have to go. Dawn and Willow will be home soon and I want to let them know about all of this.”

“Of course. I’ll be in touch. Take care Buffy.”

“Uh-huh,” Buffy hung up the phone and stared blankly at Spike’s lighter. An escaped tear fell on the gleaming metal as what Giles had said sunk in. Spike was alive and on his way back to her that very minute. What would she say to him? What would she do when he came through that door? Did he still love her? Did he even want to be with her? What if he didn’t? But then again…what if he did? Was she ready to be with him? Was she just setting herself up for another disaster by falling in love with a vampire once again?

“You look good in green” Dawn barged through the door; her arms were full of shopping bags. Willow was right behind her, smile lighting up her face. The girls had gone shopping for the perfect dress for Willow, who had a special night planned for Paige.

“I don’t know Dawnie…Buffy?” Willow stopped in mid-stride as she noticed Buffy setting on the couch, staring at what looked to be a cigarette lighter with tears in her eyes. “Buffy, what is it?”

Buffy looked up at her best friend and sister. The news had finally sunk in and she was reeling from it. How was she going to tell them? Maybe she just blurt it out and get it over with. Yes. That was the perfect solution. “Spike’s alive. He’s alive."

4

The apartment was quiet, yet the atmosphere weighed heavily on Spikes shoulders. He had just arrived, yet there had been no sign of the slayer. He stopped and sniffed at the air and his heart lurched as he caught not only the scent of vanilla that he associated with Buffy, but also the warm fragrance of her blood mixed with the dark scent of his sire. All was coming from the direction of the bedroom.

Bloody hell! Angelus was already there! Spike just hoped to whatever God was out there that he was not too late, even though he knew that he was. The rich fragrance of her blood was calling out to him, drawing him closer and closer to her location.

Finally, he came to the end of the hallway, just outside the door on the left, where the smell of fading life was strongest. Silently, he opened the door and stepped in, vamping out at the sight that met him. Buffy’s pale, lifeless body in Angelus’s arms. Two puncture wounds on her neck were the only sign that she was completely drained.

“You were right, Spike. Slayer blood is mmm-mmm good,” Angelus grinned, licking the last remnants of the liquid from her neck.

No! No, this could not be happening! Not to Buffy! Not like this!

“No!” Spike sat upright in his chair. He frantically glanced around at his surroundings, searching for any sign of Angel and Buffy, only to find himself on the private jet with everyone asleep but Lorne, who seemed to be in engrossed in a book about Broadway.

It had been a dream. All of it. Spike didn’t know wheatear to feel relieved or anxious about it all. As far as he knew, Buffy was still alive, but for how long before Angelus got to her? Would she be willing to stake him if need be?

Bugger all! It was impossible to be sure. Spike closed his eyes and called up another image of his slayer. Beautiful, strong, yet so vulnerable. She was the only thing that mad his hart want to beat again. He was such a sodden fool for staying away from her, like he had. If he had just gone to her as soon as he was corporeal …well, there really was no use for that line of thought. He had not gone to her and now he was, but only because Angelus was on the loose. She was really going to hate him when she found out just how long he had been back from the dead. There was no doubt in his mind about that.

“I’ve died, so many years ago; but you can make me feel, like it isn’t so…” Spike began to sing, wanting to return to the days in Sunnydale, when everything seemed so much simpler then they did now. “Why you come to be with me, I think I finally know…”

Little did Spike know that he had an audience. Impressed by the smooth yet roughness of Spike’s voice, Lorne stopped reading the book and out of curiosity, began to read Spike. To say that he was in awe was an understatement. Spike was so much more then he seemed to be, even without the soul. He had a huge capacity to love and when he did, it was forever. Better yet, those feelings he had for the slayer had been returned ten-fold. The poor chap just didn’t know it. Well…maybe it was time he did.

“She meant it, you know,” Lorne reached over to touch Spike’s arm. “She loves you and still does.”

Spike looked at Lorne as if he had grown another head. “What are you going on about, mate?”

Lorne leaned closer, hoping to drive his point home. Spike deserved the happiness that came from love, just as much as anybody did. He could not let him stay in the dark about this any longer. “Your destiny, precious. I just had a little looksie at your soul during your little ditty and I must say that I am impressed. It’s not everyday a vampire earns both his soul and the love of a slayer.”

“Oh. Well, the soul, yeah. That happened, but I never had her love and probably never will.”

“Well cutie pie, that’s not what your aura says. You are swimming in her affection as we speak. Something tells me that you have someone waiting down there in the hell mouth,” Lorne smiled, hoping that he had just put Spike on the right path. “Trust me Junior; love has finally done right by you.”

“If you say so, mate,” Spike shrugged, not daring to put too much stock in what Green said. Fred had once told him of Lorne’s gift to read souls when people sang, but the thought of Buffy actually being in love with him…well that was just too bloody impossible for him to believe. She cared about him that had been obvious in Sunnydale. Heck, she may even consider him a friend. However, love? Nah. Not going to happen. To think so would just be setting himself up for another fall, a fall that he did not want to take ever again.

~*~

“Spike’s alive?” Dawn frowned as she spotted her sister’s tears. She had hoped that Buffy’s tears were a thing of the past, but now it seemed as if the tears had made a complete comeback.

“What?” Willow took a seat beside her friend, her green eyes conveying the shock she felt at the news.

Buffy looked up at Willow and Dawn, wondering if she sounded crazy to them. Heck, she sounded crazy to herself. “Spike’s alive.”

“How? When? Are you sure?” Dawn stammered her eyes wide with disbelief.

“Yes. Giles just called and told me. It turns out that Angelus is back and looking for a rematch. Spike is on his way here to help us deal with the dark wonder.”

“I don’t understand. How is it that he’s alive? I mean…Sunnydale completely collapsed. No one could have survived that,” Dawn frowned, tucking a brown strand behind her ear.

“Giles didn’t tell me much. He just said that Angelus was back and so was Spike.”

“Wow. I mean…wow,” Willow breathed feeling a bit dumbfounded by the news. This was something that she definitely had not been expecting.

“Buffy…what are you going to do? I mean, Angelus…you kill him…Angel dies too,” Dawn bit her lip, worried for his sister. The last time Buffy had faced Angelus, she had left town, devastated. What would happen if she had to kill him again?

“I’m hoping that it won’t come to that. I’m hoping that Will would be able to restore his soul before he even gets to Cleveland.”

“…I can…but there’s a problem. I need an orb of Thesulah and they’re almost impossible to obtain these days. I’d have to look on the black market…” Willow sighed dejectedly.

“Well then look on the black market. Just get that orb. Please…I can’t do it again…I just can’t,” Buffy brushed away a tear. She remembered all too well the pain in her heart as she plunged the sword into Angel and the look of hurt and betrayal in his eyes. She remembered how she was haunted by nightmares and how she had to struggle just to get through each day without crying. No. She could not kill Angel again. She would die first.

“Hey, I’ll look and I’ll keep looking. We will get Angel back. I promise,” Willow hugged her friend tightly. “Don’t worry. We’ll save Angel and find out what’s going on with Spike.”

“What do you want me to do?” Dawn asked, eager to help. She had witnessed the Angelus episode back in Sunnydale. She wanted to help make sure that the bastard never hurt her sister again.

“Go to school and live life like you normally do.”

“Buffy!” Dawn exclaimed, exasperated. She was sick of being treated like a child. She was ready to help now. She wanted to be a protector instead of the protected.

“I mean it Dawn. You are not to go near this. Angelus is not Spike. He is deadly and malicious. I don’t want you in a situation where he could get to you,” Buffy got to her feet, determination burning in her eyes.

“Buffy’s right Dawnie. This isn’t the time to be a junior Scooby. We’d both sleep a lot better knowing that you’re safe,” Willow squeezed Dawn’s hand. “Tell y you what. You can help me surf the net for the ingredients I need for the soul restoration spell. I’ll go get your computer set up now,” Willow patted Dawn’s hand one more time before heading up to her room to gather up her old computer.

Buffy stuffed Spike’s lighter into her pocket and turned to go into the restroom when Dawn grabbed her arm.

“Do you still love him?”

“Angel? Well…I don’t know. He’ll definitely…”

“No. Spike. Do you still love Spike?”

Buffy stared at Dawn, feeling a mixture of emotions. She honestly didn’t know how to answer that question. Just the thought of Spike brought up new feeling in her, but was those feelings love? She honestly couldn’t say.

“Buffy!” Caitlin Stevens, one of the students that Buffy trained everyday, entered the apartment, interrupting what was to be Buffy’s answer to Dawn’s question. “We have company. A man, one vampire, some chick with blue hair, and a demon. Raianne wanted to slay all of them, but I thought that we should talk to you first. Buffy, they claim to be here to help you.”

“Oh God, they’re here already. Where are they now?” Buffy pushed back the raising dread that she felt at seeing Spike again. What was she going to say to him? What would he say to her? Would he explain why he had not bothered to contact her upon his miraculous return? “Alright, nobody slays anything. They are friends. Where are they?”

“Waiting in the foyer,” Caitlin turned, motioning for Dawn and Buffy to follow her.

As Buffy walked, the angrier she grew. Obviously, Spike has been back for a while, yet he had not even bothered to let her know that he was alive. All those months of mourning his loss had all been for nothing! Now he was here in Cleveland, expecting her to welcome him back with opened arms! Well he had another thing coming!

Finally, they reached the foyer, where the small group from L.A. was surrounded by a large group of girls, ready to stake them on Buffy’s command. Buffy’s anger increased when she spied the platinum blond talking to a loudly dressed green demon. Pushing her way through the girls, she came to stand face to face with him.

“Spike,” Her voice was void of all the shaky emotions that were churning inside her, but her stormy eyes held her anger.

“Buffy…” Spike’s eyes widened at the sight of her. She was even more beautiful then he had remembered. Her hair was now an inch shorter and she had gained a few pounds, giving her a healthy glow. He searched for something to say. Something cool and familiar, but all thoughts seemed to have fled the minute she had entered the room. “Long time no see, hey Luv?”

“Buffy!” Dawn exclaimed in shock as her sister’s fist smashed into Spike’s nose, wheeling him back against Lorne.

5

“Bloody hell, woman!” Spike pressed a white cloth to his now bleeding nose. A punch to the nose was the last thing he had been expecting. Tears…maybe yelling if she was angry, but never violence. Supposedly, that was a thing of the past for them. “Why do you always go for the nose?!”

“That’s for not telling me that you were back!” Buffy angrily approached him and punched him in the stomach. “And this is for telling Giles instead of me that you were alive!”

“Buffy, just give me a minute. I can explain…wait…Giles told you?” Spike frowned. He cursed himself for being so stupid. He should have known not to trust Giles. The watcher was probably hoping that Buffy would stake him on sight.

“Yes he told me! How long Spike? How long have I been grieving for your sorry ass?” Buffy asked, allowing Willow and Dawn to hold her back for the time being. Never in her life had she been so angry. Spike…the one person she had thought would never leave her…did. The pain she felt at such a revelation…it was overbearing.

Spike swallowed, feeling very nervous. Something told him that things were about to get a lot worse for him, but he couldn’t lie to her again, not anymore. All lies did was hurt her. He was determined never to do that again. He had caused her enough pain as it is.

“A year…give or take a few days”

Buffy blinked, once…then again. She looked at Dawn, who had tears of hurt and anger in her own eyes. She looked at Willow…who was mad for all three of them. Suddenly, their hold was gone and Buffy’s rage took over. Wresting a stake from one of the girls, Buffy slammed the wood into Spike’s abdomen, making sure to miss his heart.

“UGH! BLOODY HELL!” Spike cried out as wave upon wave of pain spread throughout his body. Only one pain was worse then what he felt now…burning up from the inside out, thanks to that sodden amulet.

“Do you feel that Spike? The pain is agonizing, isn’t it? That’s the same amount of pain that you’ve caused both me and Dawn…maybe even Willow! Not a very good feeling is it?” Tears poured from her eyes, her heart ached with hurt and anger.

“Buffy…please…,” Spike gasped against the pain, reaching out a hand in an attempt to touch her. If he just touched her…the contact would explain everything, soothe all hurt feelings, make everything better again, the way it had been before the last battle of Sunnyhell. He just had to touch her. “Let me explain…”

“Explain?” Buffy stepped further out of reach, her body shivering with even more rage. “What can you possibly say to explain yourself here? There’s nothing! Obviously you didn’t care about us like you said you did. Just…just go to hell Spike and this time…stay there!” Buffy pushed through the gathering crowd of slayers and ran to her apartment, just needing time to herself to think over the past year and think on what she was going to do now that Spike was back in her life.

Spike laid there and closed his eyes against not only the pain, but the knowledge that he had once again hurt Buffy. He was such a wanker now that he looked back on the reason he had stayed away. As soon as he was corporeal again, he should have gone to her. He should have explained everything and free her from the pain she was feeling. But no. Thanks to his need for a glorious exit, he had stayed away and allowed her suffering to continue.

“She’s right you know. You did hurt us…a lot,” Dawn stood above him, her eyes dry, yet just as hurt as her sister’s. “Why Spike? I thought that you loved us.”

“I do Niblet. I just thought …I just…I didn’t think that you’d be happy to see a reminder of your old lives. I thought that you had the normal thing going on and didn’t need me showing up to bullocks it all up for you,” Spike struggled to his feet, with the help of Wesley.

“What? What a bunch of whoey,” Willow frowned, just as upset as Buffy and Dawn. She had grown to think of Spike as a friend and had also been left to mourn his loss. Obviously, he had no idea how many people had cared about him. Even Xander had shed a few tears for Spike as he was grieving Anya. “They loved you Spike, and I liked you a lot. You should have known that and came to us instead of hiding out in L.A.”

“I know that now, Red. What can I say but I’m sorry. I listened to Angel the one time that I shouldn’t have. I never meant to hurt any one of you,” Spike bowed his head, knowing that it’ll take a lot more then I’m sorry to get Buffy to forgive him.

Willow sighed and turned away from him, not knowing how to answer. In her book, he was forgiven, but it won’t be so easy where Buffy was concerned. The men in the slayer’s life had a history of leaving when she needed them the most. It hurt her to think that Spike had done the same thing, after he had sworn never to leave her. “Give her time. You showing up alive and all non-dusty is a big shock to her. Let it all sink in before trying to talk to her again.”

Ready for a change of subject, Willow looked for Fred among the small group of visitors. She gasped when she saw the change in the young scientist. “Fred?” She took a few steps towards the leather clad woman, but was stopped by Spike taking hold of her arm.

“That’s not Fred, Luv. Not anymore. Name’s Illyria now.”

“What?” Willow asked, confused. What was Spike talking about? Of course that was Fred. Sure she definitely looked different from the last time she had seen her, but it was still Fred.

“Fred is dead. You see…a month ago, Fred’s body was invaded by a parasitic…demon…an old one. She was hollowed out and made into a shell. Who you see before you now is Illyria. One of the demons that had first walked the earth before the beginning of man.”

“And Fred?” Willow’s eyes widened in alarm. This certainly explained the hair and the eyes, the way she was dressed and the cold indifference coming off Fred…Illyria.

“Her soul was consumed by the transformation. As far as we can tell…she’s gone,” Wesley pushed back the grief that once again threatened to swallow him whole. Some days he felt as if he was healing, but at times his grief would come back full force. It would seem as if he was losing her all over again.

“Oh…I’m sorry. I didn’t know,” Willow dunked her head, sad about Fred’s loss and Wesley’s obvious broken heart. He must have really loved her. She wished that there was something she could do to take away his pain. Wait a minute…maybe there was something she could do. “You know, maybe…after we’ve fixed Angel’s soul…perhaps I can help get Fred back. It wouldn’t hurt to try.”

“Sounds like an idea, Red. If Fred can be saved, you’re the one to do it,” Spike nodded, glancing at Wesley. “The witch here brought Buffy back from the dead and changed the slayer rule. If anyone can bring Fred back, it’s her.”

“We’ll see,” Wesley sighed, trying not to be too optimistic. It was best not to hope…that way he wouldn’t be disappointed when it didn’t work. “But I think restoring Angel’s soul is first priority.”

“You’re right. Of course it is,” Willow nodded in agreement.

“This conversation has no interest for me. It’s meaningless and small,” Illyria spoke up. “I want to fix my pet and return to Wesley’s home.”

“Rude much,” a red head in the back snorted.

“If I have told you once, I’ve told you a million times! I am not your bloody pet! I keep telling you that, yet you won‘t listen!” Spike growled, glaring at Dawn when she giggled in pure amusement. It was quite ironic. Pet was a regular nickname he used for Buffy…now here was this old one calling him a pet.

“Not funny, bit,” Spike couldn’t resist a smile of his own. It was good to hear Dawn laugh. It’s probably been too long since she could find anything to laugh about.

“I do apologize,” Wesley sighed, feeling a bit tired and depressed once again as he wished for the return of his soft, shy, beautiful Fred. She was so much kinder then this Illyria…thing. Illyria was everything Fred wasn’t. Blunt, rude, and harsh. It was hard to believe that his Fred had once inhabited that hard, cold shell that Illyria now called home.

“Wes, I’ll try to get Fred back. I promise…right after we fix Angel,” Willow recognized the pain of unbearable loss in Wes’s eyes as he looked away from Illyria. It hadn’t been that long ago since she had carried the same pain inside her heart. It was hard not to recognize hurt so raw and debilitating.

“Willow, I appreciate the offer, but bringing Fred back is impossible. Her soul was consumed by the transformation…it’s gone.”
“The soul is immortal. It cannot be fully destroyed. No matter what,” Willow took the older man’s hand and squeezed it, trying to be reassuring. . She wanted to help the former watcher more then anything…give some kind of hope that he could get the woman he loved back. The pain in his eyes was just too much for her to bear. “The soul may be damaged, but it’s not completely gone. I may still be able to get her back.”

“Sounds like a bloody good idea to me, but can we talk about sleeping arrangements now? Slayer had gotten me good, she did. This is one thing that isn’t going to heal overnight,” Spike spoke up as he felt his strength beginning to wane. What he needed was some sleep and some blood. After that, he’ll approach Buffy again. They had a lot to say to one another. Things that have been avoided for way too long already.

“Follow me, pet,” Dawn grinned, for the first time in months she felt completely happy. She had missed Spike terribly. He was the only one that had treated her like an adult, yet at the same time protected her with his life. She had been crushed by his death. But he was back now, and there was no more need for tears of loss. Only tears of happiness. Bright happy days were here again and this time she was hoping that they would stay.

6

Buffy bit her lip nervously as she stood outside the apartment that Dawn and Willow had given the LA team. Spike was in there, probably recuperating from what she had done to him. She winced at the familiar pang of guilt that has been stabbing at her for the past six hours. She was wrong in using that stake on Spike. She could have killed him and this time he wouldn’t have been coming back and she would have had to face Angelus alone.

Buffy touched the door and closed her eyes with a sob as she felt the tingling sensation shoot through her abdomen, telling her that a vampire was within those walls.

“Spike,” She sighed, leaning her forehead against the door.

“Why don’t you go on in and see him, sweetie. The two of you have a lot to talk about,” a warm voice spoke up from behind her.

Buffy frowned at what obviously was a demon and a loudly dressed one at that. “You must be Lorne.”

“Angel Cakes must have told you about me.”

“No, actually it was Willow. She said that you’re the most interesting demon that she had ever met.”

“Ah, she flatters me,” Lorne laughed, placing a gentle hand on Buffy’s shoulder. “Come sweetie. I’ll take you to him. Your souls are screaming out for one another. It’s becoming impossible for me to ignore it any longer,” Lorne led Buffy into the apartment.

The room was dark, with a sliver of light coming from the window. Wesley was setting down at the desk in the corner, his head in his hands. He came to attention when Buffy entered. He immediately got to his feet and blocked her from moving any further into the apartment.

“Buffy. What brings you here?” suspicion darkened his gaze, thinking that she was there to finish off the vampire within, once and for all.

“Don’t worry; I’m not here to finish the job. I just need to speak with him.”

“I’m sorry, but Spike’s resting and…”

“Let her see him Wes. She has no ill intentions. All of her anger is gone now. All I see now is hurt. Poor dear,” Lorne defended Buffy. He had to. He had felt the slayer’s grief all the way in LA and would do anything to help end it.

“I won’t be long. I just need to apologize and tell him that I’m glad that he’s not dead.”

Wesley sighed. He really did not want to trust Buffy’s temper, but then again, Lorne had vouched for her. Maybe five minutes wouldn’t hurt. “Ok. Fine. But I want all wooden objects left out here,” Wesley stepped aside. “He’s in the room on the right.”

“Thank you, Wes. I promise, I’ll behave,” Buffy headed for Spike’s room, ready to get the apology over with.

“Those two are destined for one another,” Lorne sighed, a romantic smile lighting up his eyes. He liked to see young love, especially when it was as true as the love between the slayer and the English vampire.

“You’re a matchmaker now?” Wesley frowned.

“Don’t have to be. The powers that be had tied their souls together. They have decided that Spike and Buffy were worthy of one another. The greatest slayer of all and the vampire she had chosen as her champion.”

“I can’t help but feel sorry for Angel. She was his reason for wanting the Shanshu prophecy so badly…”

“But now he wants her dead. So I really don’t feel all that bad.”

“Lorne, you know that it’s Angelus, not…”

“Keep telling yourself that, sugar,” Lorne shook his head. He had never brought into that Angel/Angelus explanation. To him, they were the same. The soul had just given him a stronger conscious.

“Lorne…”

“Wes, don’t. I know what I’m talking about and what I feel. Now, I’m tired and you know what happens when I don’t get my beauty rest,” Lorne patted his friend’s back before disappearing into his room.

Wesley watched the green demon go, thinking of how wrong Lorne was. When Angel was back to himself again…he was going to be heartbroken.

~*~

Spike was laying flat on his back, just staring up at the ceiling as he pondered his life up until now. He still could not believe that he had come to this point. He had spent a century idolizing one of the most vicious vampires in history. He even took it a step further, and killed two slayers. Now here he was, all souled up. He protected the slayer, the woman he loved from the very creature that he had worshipped a century ago. So many twists and turns…life was funny that way.

“Spike?” her voice was nervous and submissive, yet her very presence reeked of strength and bravery. He looked over at her framed in the doorway. Her hazel eyes were full of guilt, worry, and hurt.

“Buffy,” he winced in pain as he sat up. He was healing nicely, but it was taking longer to heal since she had used wood. “Come on in, Luv. I won’t bite.”

“Says who?” Buffy forced a smile, trying to lighten the situation some. Her smile faded a bit as she remembered the true purpose of her visit. “Uh…Spike…I’m here to apologize for beating you up and stabbing you with that stake. I guess everyone was right about me. I do need to go into anger management,” She smiled sheepishly.

“You had every right to be angry, Pet. You’re right. I should have made contact sooner. I just thought…I had thought that you were better off without me. I had thought that you happily living that normal life you always wanted.”

“You’ve been listening to Angel haven’t you?” Buffy finally stepped into the room and went to set by his side. “I’m going to tell you what I told him when he fed me the same line of garbage. I am a vampire slayer. I’ll never be normal. Being the slayer sets me apart from being normal.”

“Even in a world full of slayers?”

Buffy sighed in growing frustration. She felt as if history was repeating itself. Again, the vampire she cared for wanted to give her the impossible. She had to make him see her fate for what it was and accept it, as she shad done a long time ago.

“Maybe if I had gotten my powers like the others and hadn’t been the chosen one for so long…maybe if I had never stopped an apocalypse or even laid eyes on a vampire…maybe a normal life would have been possible. But I have seen and done too much. Heck, I’ve died two times and knew the peace of heaven, just to be ripped out again. I sent a whole town to the bottom of hell. A normal life is impossible for me.”

Spike looked away in embarrassment. He would have blushed if he could over his own stupidity. He was being a big Poofter. What Buffy had just told him had been the same thing he had told Angel a number of times. Too bad he was too much of a bloody moron to follow his own advice. “There’s nothing I can say but I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking, obviously.”
“Spike, you never think,” Buffy laughed. “For what it’s worth…I’m glad that you’re not dust after all. Believe it or not, I’ve missed you.”

“I’m glad that I’m not dust either, Pet,” Spike smirked, beginning to feel more relaxed. Things were beginning to feel familiar again. She was still the same Buffy he had known for all these years. Strong, beautiful, and at times vulnerable. She had not changed a bit.

Buffy sighed, thinking of how much she had missed this rapport between Spike and herself. Things seemed to be returning to normal between them, or at least as normal as they could be under the circumstances. Buffy bit her lip as she looked away from him as old feelings began to bubble to the surface. Now was not the time for such things. They had Angelus’s return to deal with. There was no time to deal with romantic feelings right now.

“So…how did it happen this time? Why did Angel lose his soul? Was it that werewolf that I heard he was seeing?”

Spike looked away from Buffy as he felt the guilt rise in his chest. How could he tell her? The reason why Angel got a happy wasn’t because of a woman…it was because of him and his selfish need for a sire. He had given Angel the happy and now it was his responsibility to get him back…or do away with him all together.

“Spike?” Buffy frowned, seeing the guilt darken his blue eyes. The reason much have been bad for the flash of emotion she had just seen. “What is it?”
Spike opened his mouth to answer, but was interrupted by the lively tone of Buffy’s cell phone.

“Buffy here,” she answered, looking away from the vampire that was causing her heart to beat a thousand miles per minute.

“Hello lover,” the seductive voice whispered, dripping with hatred and evil. “I’m back.”

Buffy swallowed down the fear that rose up. Revealing how he affected her was the worst thing she could do. Looking at Spike for added support, she slipped into slayer mode, protecting the young girl that Angelus had put through hell. “So I’ve heard, Angelus. What do you want? Another free trip to hell? Because I’d be happy to arrange that for you.”

“No sweetheart. I want your heart on a platter for me to devour it whole. But not until I get a taste of all those freshly made slayers.”

“You don’t go near them. Your beef is with me,” Buffy growled through clenched teeth.

“Ah. I see. Want me all to yourself do you?” Angelus chuckled. “Well baby that can be arranged.”

“Looking forward to it,” Buffy snorted.

Spike’s frown deepened as he listened to Buffy’s end of the conversation. Angelus was obviously p laying games with her, but it was time for those games to be put to an end. Wincing against t he pain in his abdomen, Spike got out of bed and plucked the phone from Buffy’s hand before she had a chance to protest.

“You bloody wanker! I told you to stay away from her!” Spike vamped out as his anger and hatred for his sire’s evil alter ego took over.

“Ah, I see you came rushing to the slayer’s rescue once again, Spike. How predictable. You’re even more whipped then my soul was,” Angelus laughed. “Tell me, are you enjoying my leftovers? Has all these years taught her any new tricks, because when I had her…”

“Your days are numbered, Angelus,” Spike growled, wishing that he could dust the vamp with the venom in his voice.

“I wouldn’t talk if I were you, boy. You’ve sided with the enemy. How much longer do you think you can survive when he learns of your betrayal? You’d be lucky if I got to you first. At least I’d make it less painful.”

Spike rolled his eyes. Just another attempt by Angelus to intimidate him. It was too bad that it didn’t work. It had been years since Spike had feared his sire, a fear that had disappeared a long time ago. “Bring it on Angelus. I’m waiting for you.”

“I’m not the one you’ll have to worry about Spike. But you’re going to wish I was,” Angel hung up the phone, leaving Spike in silence.

“Sodden bastard,” Spike cursed, hanging the phone up.

“Don’t let him get to you,” Buffy watched Spike sink onto the bed, his face hidden in his hands. She was confused by the pain and guilt she had glimpsed in his eyes. What was that all about?
“Spike…I don’t know how Angel had lost his soul, but I’m sure that it had nothing to do with you,” Buffy touched his arm, feeling an overwhelming need to comfort him.

Spike met her gaze, amazed by the strength of the conviction in her voice. She still believed in him…even after what he had done, she still believed him to be a good man.

“If only you knew, pet,” he held her gaze, searching for what he had seen the last day before the big battle of Sunnydale. Looking for the warmth of friendship mixed with the promise of something more.

“Spike…I…,” Buffy stammered, beginning to feel a bit flustered. His gaze was so intense…so full of want and a need to be wanted…a need that matched her own. He was everything she had ever wanted...everything she had ever needed…but obviously, that hadn’t been enough, because he had left her. Just like all the others and she wasn’t sure that she could forgive him.

Spike leaned in, wanting to kiss her so badly, wanting to fulfill the promise that her eyes held, but before his lips could even brush hers, she moved away. She stood next to the door, hurt clear in her eyes.

“But you’re still a jerk for not letting me know that you were alive.”

“Buffy,” Spike struggled to his feet, needing to make things right for her, needing to ease the hurt that he had caused so they could move past it, but she was gone by time he had gotten to the door. He was left alone to wonder if they were really meant to be, or was he once again just chasing a dream that would never happen.

7

Darkness concealed Angelus as he knelt before the alter, his head bowed in a show of submission, while his pale hands tightly clenched a string of beads that were as black as night. His eyes clenched shut as his mouth moved, forming words of promise, pleas, and retribution. Other than the hushed whisper of Angelus’s voice, silence reigned. Silence was needed if the ritual was to succeed.

The beads tumbled to the ground as the ground began to quake. Angelus struggled to his feet, just as the earth split open, allowing sulfur smelling gases to escape. His prayers were being answered. Soon, the great one will return and the world will bleed. No one could stop it now. Not even that annoying slayer that he had allowed himself to be destracted by in the days preceeding Acathla.

“Come. Your son welcomes you home!” Angelus stepped closer to the opening, just as a pale claw reached out from the depths and clasped the edge. A moan was heard as a black clad form lifted itself out of the crator. Angelus bowed and kissed the creature’s hand. “Welcome, Master.”

“My son. Angelus, you have returned…and so have I,” The master looked around at his surroundings; his red eyes gleamed with curiosity. “Tell me my boy. What has happened since my demise? Tell me everything, leave nothing out.”

Angelus got to his feet and walked at a steady pace next to the elder vampire. He kept his face to the ground, a sign of submission. Usually, he would hate showing any kind of submission at all, and in the beginning, he had resisted the Master’s attempts to tame him. However, that was then, when the vampire world was at its height. Now, times were different. The vampire population was now dwindling thanks to the increase of slayers. “The California Hell mouth is gone. It is just a smoking crater now. The girl had destroyed it, along with the help of my Childe, Spike.”

“William the bloody? Surely you must be mistaken,” The Master stopped in his track, his voice full of disbelief. William the bloody was the most vicious vampire, only second to Angelus himself. What could have happened to tame him to be of some use to the slayer?
“If only I were. It’s all thanks to the United States government. They had placed a chip in his head. Made him incapable of feeding. He was forced to beg for scraps from the Slayer and her cronies. It was quite sad.”

The Master shook his head in disappointment, wondering why it seemed that the vampires from his line seemed to fall under this particular girl’s spell. First Angelus and now William. This was quite disturbing news indeed.

“It gets worse from there. William now has a soul.”

“He was cursed?”
Angelus sighed, this not getting any easier. He was so shamed by the actions of his childe. He had done everything to ensure that William was as vicious a vampire as he was…but now all those lessons had gone to waste, all because of this obsession with the slayer. “No. He went and got the soul himself, and it’s permanent. He’s a souled vampire out of his own accord.”

The Master sighed, deeply disappointed by this turn of events. Back when he was alive, he would have taken care of this when the boy was first chipped. He would have made sure that there was no need for him to beg for help from the likes of the slayer. Moreover, if he had become so obsessed with the girl…he would have destroyed him right there and then. “If only I was still alive. Tell me…what had happened to my anointed one? Surely the boy still lives.”

“Spike destroyed him when he and Dru first came to town. I don’t know the details, but Spike had once called him the annoying one and you know how he used to be…so impatient.”

“Your Childe has done deep damage to my line Angelus. How are you going to fix this? Surely, he has again aligned with this slayer. How do you plan to bring him back to the fold?”

Angelus frowned. Bringing Spike back into the fold was not part of the plan. The plan was to torture and kill the slayer. Bring down the house of slayer all together, and rule the world, if not destroy it. But turning Spike back to the dark side…he had never thought of that. “I plan to torture and kill the slayer.”

“What of Spike? Is there a way we can get rid of the soul? Are you sure that it is permanent?”

“…There’s no way to take the soul from him, unfortunately…but maybe…Spike loves the slayer. Maybe we can turn that to our advantage.”

An idea came to the Master; his eyes gleamed with malicious glee as the idea took shape. “She’s the doorway to his very essence. We can use her to corrupt his soul. Once he is corrupt…he will do our bidding. We’ll be unstoppable.”

Angelus just grinned as the Master laughed and laughed. Yes, evil was home and this time to stay. Just let the Slayer try to stop them. It will be the last thing she will ever do.

~*~

Silence reigned over Slayer central. The new slayers were all doing their own thing, from training to just reading a book. The LA team was doing some research on Angelus and his ammo, all except for Spike, who was still recuperating from being staked. Buffy was in the kitchen with Willow, helping her prepare that night’s dinner. Dinner preparation was Buffy/Willow time. The time the friends took to grow close again and bond over simple things, suchas talk about make up or fixing Xander up on a date. That night’s topic though, was something Buffy rather not talk about but Willow was insistant on. Spike’s return and how it will affect Buffy’s new life.

“Have you talked to him yet?” Willow asked, dicing up the carrots that would go into her soup. It was best to just come out and start the conversation. Buffy sure wasn’t. In fact, the head slayer was doing her best to not talk at all in order to avoid any conversation leading to the British vampire in apartment B9.

“How much Oregano are you going to need?” Buffy asked, not bothering to answer the question. The less mentioned about Spike…the better. In fact, if she could just forget that he was there, she would be perfectly happy.

“None. Now, tell me. Have you talked to Spike yet? You might as well tell me now,” Willow shook her head in determination. She wasn’t going to let this conversation slip past so easily. She wanted answers about Spike and she wanted them now.

Buffy sighed, her shoulders slumped in defeat. She should have known Willow would insist on dragging the truth out of her. “We talked. I apologized, he apologized, we got a call from Angel and that was it.”

“You apologized? Well…that’s something new,” Willow snorted back a giggle.

“Willow!”

“Kidding!” the witch laughed, shaking her head in amusement. “You’re so sensitive. Did you two talk about anything else…say how you feel about one another?”

Buffy shrugged. “Not really. He knows that I’m still angry with him. God, I so can’t believe he didn’t get in touch with me.”

Willow sighed. This was how it always was with Buffy and her men. They would dance around each other’s feelings until one of them got hurt and left. She’d really hate to see that happen to Buffy and Spike. Those two…they fit. Their auras were identical to one another. They were soul mates. “Buffy…how do you feel about Spike…I mean really feel about him? Are you in love with him?”

Buffy’s eyes widened in shock at the question. In love? With Spike? Has Willow completely flipped her lid? In love with Spike? Why just the idea…it was…it was…well, it just didn’t make sense. Why would Willow ask such a thing? “Will…where did that come from? Am I in love with Spike? Why would you ask that?”

A deep blush reddened Willow’s cheeks. She hadn’t meant to offend Buffy; she just wanted to help her. Help her discover her true feelings before it was too late. After all, in their line of work, tomorrow was not promised to any of them. If Buffy loved Spike, it was best that she let him know now instead of keeping it to herself, until she lost him…for good this time. “Buffy…your aura…not to sound like Paige, but it calls out to him, just as his calls out to you. You two…let’s just say that it’s impossible for you not to have strong feelings for him.”

“Oh, I have strong feelings for him alright. Can you say anger?”

“Buffy…”

“No Willow. No. I can’t do that…not again…not just to get my heart broken like it was with Angel…like it was with Spike when he died in that crater. I can’t do it.”

Willow’s heart went out to her friend. The fear of the girl was enough to overcome the courage of the slayer at times. She had to make her see that Spike was different. That he was worth the risk. He was not Angel, and he certainly wasn’t Riley. He was her soul mate. They were meant to be together. It was more obvious now then ever before.

“Buffy…you know how much I loved Tara. She was my entire life. When she died…it felt as if I had nothing left to live for. Someone in that coven I went to in England once asked me if I would have been happier if I never met Tara. If I had never known her love. You know what my answer was to that. No. I would have been miserable not to experience her love…her spirit. Even though I had lost her in the end…I would not have missed a thing. Now. You have this chance, a second chance really. Don’t let it slip through your fingers, because next time, I have a funny feeling that he won’t be coming back. This is it Buffy. This is your chance to be happy. Grab hold of it and never let go. Tell him how you feel Buffy. For me…for Tara.”

Tears ran down Buffy’s face in rivulets. She hadn’t been expecting such a moving speech. She hadn’t been expecting to find herself in total agreement. It was time to pick her self up and have a long talk with Spike…rather he was up to it or not.

“What can I say after that?” Buffy asked, wiping away a stray tear. “You’re right. I have to stop hiding from him. I have to talk to him. Sooner or later. It might as well be sooner,” She took off her apron and headed for the door.

“Buffy?” Willow frowned, wondering what Buffy was planning. “Where are you going?”
“To see Spike. We have a lot to talk over and you’re right. Best to say what I have to say now instead of waiting until he’s dust again to say it.”

Willow smiled softly as she watched her friend walk out the door, a look of peaceful determination on her face. It’s been a long time since she saw that look. The look of Buffy Summers, out to get her man. Going back to her chopping she silently wished Buffy luck and prayed that the pair could find happiness together.

8

Spike was wide awake, staring up at the ceiling, his mind going through plans on how to get rid of Angelus when Buffy entered, looking right nervous. She stood there, just staring at him, wondering on how to approach him with the subject of their relationship. She still remembered the last real discussion they had about their blossoming friendship that seemed to be growing into something more.

He had wanted to just forget the night before, when he had held her and given her strength. He had thought that it meant nothing to her, and she had let him know that it had meant everything. She had tried to tell him that there was a chance for them. That after the battle, she wanted to explore where this thing between them were going, but he had cut her off, probably not wanting to get his hopes up. Now the subject of their relationship had come up again and now there was no coming battle to disrupt the topic. They both had no choice but to face it head on.

“Spike?” Buffy entered the room, biting her lip nervously. A gentle smile curved her lips as his eyes went from the ceiling to her. Her heart leapt as his eyes lit up with a welcoming smile. Maybe this wouldn’t be as hard as she thought it would be. “Uh…we need to talk and now seems to be a better time than any.”

Spike nodded, pushing himself up into a setting position. He knew that this moment was coming up, the moment when they would really set and discuss their relationship and where to go from here. It was just a matter of when she was ready. He had to admit…he was surprised that she would be ready so soon. Usually, getting Buffy to confess her feelings was like pulling teeth. “Sure, Pet. Set. We’ll talk about anything you want.” He patted the edge of the mattress, a mischievous gleam in his eye. He wanted so much to reassure her that there was nothing to be afraid of. He wanted to tell her that he loved her and if she didn’t love him back, that was ok. But doing such a thing was such a Peaches thing to do and he certainly was no Peaches and the last thing his slayer needed was some poof telling her how she felt. She’s had enough of that already.

Buffy avoided his gaze, embarrassed by her reaction to his return. Looking back, she seemed so irrational. Her hurt had blinded her and caused her to lose him for good. How could she make him understand, when she couldn’t understand herself. Taking a deep breath, she looked him straight in the eye, gathering up the courage that had gotten her this far. “I…I feel like I should tell you why I was so hurt about your failure to contact me when you first returned.”

“You don’t have to explain, pet. I understand…”

“Spike please,” She placed a finger against his lips, silencing him. Interruptions were not allowed. Especially when she felt like fleeing the room, never to return again. “I need to say this. I need you to hear this. It’s important, and if I don’t say it now…I never will.”

“Ok, Luv. The floor is yours. Talk your pretty little head off,” Spike chuckled in an attempt to lighten the mood. It didn’t work, though. The atmosphere was still heavy with tension. It was so thick, that he could practically reach out and touch it.

“Ok. After the collapse of Sunnydale…we got to safety. The first place we went was to Angel. He put us up. Gave us food and shelter. Everything we needed. It wasn’t enough. Something was still missing…or rather someone. Your absence…it just ate away at me. I couldn’t sleep…I could barely eat…everyone was getting worried. So I solved that by packing up Dawn and heading for Europe…trying to forget. It didn’t work though. I still thought of you constantly. The only difference was that I hid my grief. I had promised to show Dawn the world and I didn’t want my tears to ruin that. I couldn’t even pull myself together when we moved to Rome. You still filled my mind, and I just couldn’t get over the fact that I lost you, after discovering that I truly did love you. I told Angel that you were in my heart. But you were so much more Spike. You were my heart…losing you like that…it had nearly destroyed me,” She wiped away a tear, looking away from him. She hated herself for this show of weakness. “When I said I loved you back there, Spike…I meant it. It killed me every day that you didn‘t believe me. I had thought you died thinking that I still hated you, or that I was using you to win the war.“

She had hoped to be strong and secure. Show no signs of weakness as she bared her soul to him. But that plan was out the window. The only thing she could do now was wait for his reaction.

Spike, meanwhile, cursed himself. He had caused her so much pain without even being in the same country. It seemed that all he ever did was hurt her. Soul or no soul. There was nothing he could do to take away the pain he had caused. All he could do was explain his reason why. Hopefully she didn’t think him too much of a ponce.

“To be honest, pet…I knew that you were telling the truth…I just said that so you’d go. I was afraid that you would have stayed down there with me. I couldn’t let you do that…not when you had a chance for a normal life now. Not when I knew that Dawn and all these new slayers needed you. So I lied. I hate that those three words caused you so much pain. If I had known…”

“You would have come back?”

“As soon as I was corporeal again,” Spike half-smiled. Hesitantly, he reached a hand out and wiped away a stray tear.

“Why didn’t you get in contact with me, Spike? I mean…I just don’t understand. I mean…you could have at least called…”

Spike bowed his head, really feeling like a wanker. He winced each time he thought of what he had told Harmony. He couldn’t top dying for her. What kind of an excuse was that? A poor one. Buffy deserved more then that. She deserved the truth for once. “I thought…I had thought that you were living the normal life to the hilt. I didn’t want to bollucks it up for you, luv. I thought if I showed up at your door, that it’d be the beginning of the end. Really. Think about it. What kind of normal girl has a vampire boyfriend?”

“Here we go with the normal excuse again,” Buffy sighed, rolling her eyes. She had been through this with Angel, and had let him go. Now Spike seemed to have been infected with the same excuse, but this time, she wasn’t going to let go. She was going to fight tooth and nail until he saw reason. “Spike…hello! Vampire Slayer here! I am never going to be a normal girl! Do you understand me? I mean…”

“Pet, I know. I…I was just being a insecure prick. Plain and simple.”

“Oh. Well, you were. An insecure prick. Now are you done being insecure? Are you ready to really explore whatever this is between us? Or do I need to call Riley and ask him if he has a spot open in that special operations thingy?” Buffy crossed her arms.

“Captain Cardboard? You can not be serious,” Spike nearly choked as he saw the seriousness in her eyes. “Well…do I have anything to be insecure about?”

Buffy rolled her eyes again at the question. This was pure Spike. She smiled, happy to see that his edge seemed to have returned. “No. You don’t have a reason to be insecure, Spike. I love you. I loved you then, and I love you now. The only person standing in the way of us being together is you. You do still love me…don’t you?”

Spike pulled her into his arms. “Of course I do. I never stopped loving you. Being with you…it’s been all I’ve dreamed about this past year.”

Buffy grinned, before pressing her lips against his, waves of relief washing through her. He still wanted her…as much as she wanted him. He had always known that she loved him…and now…now they were going to be together. Really together. She wasn’t using him to feel good, and she wasn’t just some obsession. They were really going to be a real couple. Nothing will ever come between them again. She was going to make sure of it. “Make love to me Spike.”

Surprised by the request, Spike pulled away and looked at her in concern. Was she serious? Did she really want to take their relationship to that level this soon? “Buffy…you don’t have to…”

“I want to. I’ve waited too long to be in your arms again. I can’t wait any longer. So, please. Make love to me. It’s what I want.”

“Well…I was never one to refuse a lady,” Spike pulled her closer to his body, being careful of the almost healed wound just below his heart. Not hesitating for a moment, he claimed her mouth, parting her lips with his tongue, tasting the sweet honey of her mouth. He groaned at the warm sensation of her breath.

“Spike,” She moaned, sliding her hands down his arms, enjoying the solidity of him as she reminded herself that this wasn’t a dream. He was really here and wasn’t going anywhere. “Spike, I need you so bad. Please…” She began unbuttoning the shirt he had slipped on earlier. Pushing the shirt off his shoulders, she ran nimble fingers down the smooth chest, sighing at the cool temperature.

Before they could go any further, shouts and screams rang out. Frowning, Buffy and Spike raced out of the apartment to find a flaming vampire standing out in middle of the foyer, surrounded by slayers with stakes ready. The vampire looked straight at Buffy, pointing at her with a knarled finger. “Angelus has Dawn. Come to the park alone, or the girl is dead!” Message delivered, the vampire disappeared in a burst of dust.

“Damn it!” Buffy cursed, racing to her room, followed by a barely limping Spike. He just stood there for a minute, watching her stuff a handful of stakes into a duffle bag, her face set in determination. He sighed, knowing that she planned doing just as Angelus said. Which, in his opinion, was a big mistake. Something was off here. He could feel it. He had to make her see the trap for what it was. He couldn’t lose her. Not after what they had just confessed.

“You’re not actually planning to go alone, are you?” Spike narrowed his eyes.

“What else can I do Spike? He has Dawn! I can’t just ignore this! She’s my sister!” Buffy looked at him, a bit exasperated.

“I know that, Luv. But don’t you think this can be a trap?”

Buffy frowned, remembering the last trap Angelus had set for her. Kendra had paid the price for that mistake. But things were different now. There were more then two slayers now. Angelus would be a fool to send minions into slayer central.

“I’ve thought of that. But what kind of trap can he set, Spike? This is slayer central, or have you forgotten? It’s not just me and Kendra anymore…”

“No. But you are still mortal. So are all those girls. Buffy…I’m not saying to leave Dawn in his claws. I’m just saying…bloody hell…just let me go with you. We can face Angelus and save bit together.”

“No. He said for me to come alone, or he’ll kill her,” Buffy shook her head, trying to force back the urge to give in to Spike. It would be easier with him by her side, but Angelus’s instructions were clear, and she wasn’t about to risk Dawn’s life because she didn’t want to face Angelus by herself.

“Buffy don’t be a bloody fool! You barely defeated Angelus before!”

“I’m stronger now.”

“Like hell…” Spike was cut off as she pressed her lips to his, her tongue forcing it’s way into the cool cavern of his mouth. He moaned in dismay as she felt her hand move down to his erection, caressing his manhood through the thick denim. He knew then that all conversation was lost. Especially when his hands began unbuttoning her blouse and began to fondle her silk-clad breast.

“Shhh…let’s not fight about this,” She pushed him down onto the bed, unzipping his jeans, releasing his shaft. Claiming his mouth again, she ran her hand from the base to the head of his length.

“Buffy,” He groaned in pleasure as he hardened even more. Pulled down her skirt and underwear, and found her core. He then began to rub her clitoris. He inwardly grinned as he heard her moan of pleasure .

“Spike! God, Spike, I need you so much,” She leaned down to claim his lips, trapping his throbbing length between their bodies. He groaned as his hips arched gripping her hips, he slid her up and then down over his cock, where he quickly entered her, after flipping Buffy on her back. The blonde slayer gasped in pleasure and began to ride him, each thrust sending waves of pleasure through her body.

“Spike,” She gasped, feeling her building climax. She gripped his shoulders, as he leaned down and nibbled the skin of her neck with blunt teeth. She had never felt such pleasure before. She knew it all had to do with the love she had for him. It made everything so much more real and pleasurable. “I love you, Spike!” she declared as they both climaxed at once. “God, I love you.”

“I love you too, kitten,” Spike pulled a blanket over their sweaty bodies. He held her close as he breathed in her scent of strawberries and vanilla. He loved her more then anything, and this time, he wasn’t going to bullucks it all up. He was going to make their relationship work. “I love you too.”

Laying in each others arms, exhausted from their lovemaking, Buffy and Spike were secure in each other’s love for one another. They both knew that their relationship had changed for the better. At that moment, nothing on earth could come between them.

“Spike?” Buffy asked, her voice full of hesitation. She hated to ask him this. Something told her that it was a sensitive subject, but she couldn’t resist. She had to know. “How did Angel lose his soul?”
Spike sighed, looking away from her. He knew the question was going to come up sooner or later. He was just hoping that it was later. Spike hoped to the powers that be that she would be able to forgive him. “I did it. It’s my fault that Angel lost his soul.”

“What?”
“Well…he was so depressed…I just wanted…hell, I don’t even know what I wanted. I never thought it would have endangered his soul.”

Buffy frowned, not following what Spike was trying to say. What had happened, and why was it Spike’s fault? “Spike…you’re losing me here. What did you do?”

“I…I asked him to be my sire again. To teach me how this whole soul thing worked. Show me the ropes,” Spike sighed, fighting the tears that wanted to over take him. “I had no idea that it would make him that happy. Pet, believe me, if I had known…”

“Shhh,” She pressed a finger to his lips, her eyes were understanding and her touch comforting. She knew all too well the guilt of causing Angel to lose his soul. It had eaten her up all that horrible year. She shivered to think of what it was doing to Spike now that he had a soul. “Spike, listen to me. It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t know that the offer would have him obtain complete happiness. It’s just like I didn’t know. It’s just one of those things that happen. Please, stop blaming the man I love for Angelus’s return.”

Spike looked in her eyes and drowned in the compassion and love he found there. She really did love him. He now had no doubt about it. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For loving me, like you do. I mean…I always loved…but this was the first time it was returned,” He laid his head on her stomach, where she stroked his platinum locks.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it. I mean, I was always attracted to you…it was the love part that was so hard to admit,” Buffy blushed at the memory of her first meeting with the British vampire. She had thought he was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen and it was a shame that she had to dust him. She was so glad that it never came to that.

Spike just smiled as he drifted off to sleep, warm and comfortable in their love for one another. There was no one else for him, but Buffy. That was an undeniable fact.

Kissing Spike’s forehead, Buffy waited until she was sure that he was asleep. Then she slipped out from under him and quickly jotted down a note, before slipping out the door, duffle bag in hand. She was going to end this once and for all. She was glad now that she refused to have Spike accompany her. It would kill him to have to stake his sire. His soul would never allow him to recover. So she was going to kill him herself. She did it before, and she’ll do it again. Sure, she mourned the loss of Angel, but it couldn’t be helped. Angelus was too dangerous to be kept alive any longer. He had taken Dawn, and no one got away with that and lived. Not even him.

Chapter Nine

Silence. That was all Buffy heard as she took a stepped into the seemingly empty park. Taking in her surroundings, she looked for clues of where Angelus and Dawn could be. She knew that her sister had to be afraid. The last time she had seen Angelus, he had almost ripped Dawn’s throat out…or rather…that was how she remembered it. Really, it had been Willow Angelus had grabbed in the hallway of the school. Not Dawn. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath, pushing all memories aside. She was here on a mission and she wasn’t leaving until that mission was done. Dawn or no Dawn.

“Hello lover.” Angelus stepped out from behind the trees, a gleam of amusement in his gaze. “Knew you ‘d come. Especially for the girl that shouldn’t exist.”

“Where is she?” Buffy’s voice was tight with anger. If he had laid one hand on her sister, Buffy would do more then just stake him.

Angelus just grinned and backed away into the darkness. “Come find her, slayer. She’s waiting for you.”

Damn it. She wasn’t in the mood for a game of hide and seek. She wanted to save Dawn and stake Angel as quickly as possible, so it can be over before Spike even knew she was gone. Taking a deep breath and readying her stake, Buffy followed her ex into the darkness and prayed that he led her to Dawn.

“Coming Buff? We don’t have all night! Time is running out for poor Dawnie…”

“I’m going to kill you. You know that, right? No more games Angelus. This is going to end.”

Laughter came from all directions. He was so predictable. Playing with her like this. “Ah, love. It’s never over. Not between you and me. Sent me to hell, yet I came back…”

“No. That was Angel. He came back.”

“Is that what you think? That he came back? Got news for ya darling. That wasn’t Angel. That was me. All of it. When you fed him your blood…that wasn’t him you were feeding. It was me. Thank you, by the way.”

“You’re lying.”
“Am I?”

Buffy rolled her eyes. She had enough of this mind game Angelus was playing. She wanted her sister back, and she wanted her back now. “Enough! Where is Dawnie!”

“Oh. You mean her?” Angelus stepped into a pool of moonlight, hold a bound and gag Dawn by her shoulders. It was obvious that the girl was frightened. Buffy forced herself to stay calm. “Let’s hear what she has to say,” Angelus pulled the tape off Dawn’s mouth.

“Buffy! He’s insane! You have to do something! Please!” Dawn pleaded, trying to wiggle out of the vampire’s tight grasp, but it was no use. His hold was just too #9; strong.

“Aw, but we’re having such a good time,” Angelus planted a loud kiss on Dawn’s cheek, grinning at the angry gleam in her eyes.

“Let her go Angelus. Your deal is with me. Not her. Let her go,” Buffy crossed her arms, glaring at the vampire. Oh yes. Angel or no Angel. Angelus was dead.

“But she’s so cute…,” Angelus pinched her cheek, grinning at how red with anger, Buffy’s face got.

“I am so going to kick your ass,” Buffy growled, taking a step forward, ready to push Dawn out of the way so she could drive the stake through Angelus’s heart.

Sensing the danger, Angelus untied the teen. He knew what the Master’s plan was, and his getting dusted before anything could happen, was not part of that plan. “Ok. Fine. She’s gone.” He pushed Dawn away from him.

“Buffy!” Dawn flew to her sister. “Buffy, he’s insane and he keeps talking about a master.”

“Shut up Dawnie,” Angelus growled, kicking himself for his need to brag. Buffy was not to know of the Master’s return until it was too late. It wouldn’t do for the kid to spill the news.

Buffy frowned. Something was off here. Something she was missing…but before she could figure it out, she needed to get Dawn to safety. “Dawn…go now. Go get Wes or Willow. I’m going to need back up.”

“But Buffy…” Dawn tried to protest, having a very bad feeling about all this. Something was going to happen…and it wasn’t going to be good.

“Go on. Get out of here,” Buffy pushed her sister towards the exit, wanting her as far away from this confrontation as possible.

“But…,” Dawn opened her mouth to protest, but by the look her sister threw her, she knew that it was useless to argue. The only thing she could do now was do as Buffy had asked. “Ok. Fine. Be careful,” Dawn hugged Buffy one last time before running off into the darkness, determined to get help.

Buffy watched Dawn go, trying to push back the feeling of doom that had suddenly settled into the pit of her stomach. She shook her head, wondering why all of a sudden she felt so scared. This was only Angelus after all. She had faced him before and won. She’ll win again. For her sister…and for Spike.

“Alone at last,” Angelus grinned. “What shall we do now, that it is only the two of us?”

Buffy turned to face the monster that wore the face of the man she had once loved. “Let’s dance.” She kicked his feet out from under him. Soon Angel was back on his feet and the battle was on.

“Is that my Childe I smell on you, Slayer? Ah, knew it was a matter of time. William was always a sucker for my leftovers.”

“Shut up!” Buffy threw a left hook, knocking Angelus back. She didn’t want to talk about Spike. She only wanted to kill Angelus so he could be out of their lives forever.

“Got to admit. You have good taste. Spike was always a good fuck. I should know. I’ve had him a number of times. Just couldn’t get enough. His blood tastes of Vanilla. Of course, you probably already know that.”

“You’re disgusting,” She lounged at him again, just for him to grab her by the throat. “You didn’t say that our first time, love. I should take you now. Just like I took William. The way I’m going to take him again when he comes to save the girl. It’s about time he learns some respect.”

“You stay away from him,” Buffy hissed through clenched teeth, trying to hide her fear. She had to get out of this somehow. More now then ever.

“I don’t think you are in the position to make threats, slayer. I hope he was good, since most likely, it’ll be the last time you’ll see him again. My master has great plans for you. Just as I have great plans for Spike.”

“Go back to hell.”
Angelus just laughed, before slamming her up against a nearby tree, knocking her unconscious. It was time to take her to the Master and make a request of his own…one he hadn’t thought of until now. Total control over his childe. Make Spike pay for all those years of disrespect. “Got big plans for you both,” Angelus hefted the unconscious slayer into his arms and disappeared into the darkness to appear before The Master.

~*~

Spike awoke with one phrase running through his head. “She loves me. She really loves me.” Just that thought alone made him completely and truly happy. For once, the woman he loved returned those feelings and there was nothing better then that. For the first time since Angelus lost his soul, Spike felt light and hopeful. As long as he had Buffy by his side…he could do anything…even kill his sire.

Sighing happily, he reached over, expecting to find a warm body next to his, just to be met with a cold sheet and paper addressed to him. Frowning, he picked the paper up and read. His eyes widened in terror as he realized where his love had disappeared too. Bloody hell! He should have known she would do this! And to make it worse, she did it for him! So he wouldn’t have to stake his own sire! “Damn you, Slayer!” Spike growled, feeling a mixture of love and anger.

Dropping the letter back onto the bed, Spike began to pull on his clothes, determined to find Buffy before she ran into Angelus. He had promised to take care of her, to protect her from Angelus, and that was one promise he was going to keep to Angel. Not only because he loved her, but because he loved his sire as well. Angel would never be able forgive himself if he hurt Buffy.

He had just pulled on his shirt when a blood-curdling scream rang out from the foyer. Rushing out of the apartment, he came up on the sight of Willow’s new bird, collapsed on the floor, cuddled in her lover’s embrace. Bloody hell!

“What happened?” He ran the rest of the way down the stairs to kneel down next to her.

“B-Buffy!” The girl cried out, clinging to Willow and sobbing uncontrollably.

“Buffy? What is she going on about?” Spike looked at Willow, trying to hold back the fear in his voice, but knew that his eyes told all. He was scared.

“Paige has visions. She must have had another one. She’s been having them all week. This one must have been about Buffy,” Willow frowned, trying her best to soothe her girlfriend, but to no avail. “Paige…what did you see? What about Buffy?”
“Tell us,” Spike placed a gentle hand on Paige’s arm, trying not to be so impatient.

“Buffy…she is in terrible danger…she’s going to die soon…she’ll be so shattered,” Paige sobbed, burying her face in the crook of Willow’s neck.

Spike fell back in desperate fear. Whatever was going to happen with Angelus, was most likely happening now. He had to get to them. Now, before anything could happen…before Paige’s vision could come true. Spike got to his feet and headed for the door, his jaw set in determination. It was Wesley who stepped into his path.

“May I suggest you take time to plan what we’re going to do, Spike? You’d be no help to Buffy if you run head first into this.”

“You heard her, Wes. I don’t have time. My girl is in trouble, and I’m going to go get her out of it. Now get out of my way before I move you myself.”

Wesley opened his mouth to protest when Giles rushed through the door, holding a box.

“I have found an Orb of Thesulah,” Giles held up the box, a bit confused. Why was Paige and Willow on the floor? And why did Spike look like he was going to pummel Wesley.

“Good. Red. Get that soul spell started. I’m off to retrieve my slayer,” Spike pushed Wesley out of the way and rushed past Giles, not looking back to see if his instructions were being followed. He knew they were. Willow loved Buffy too, and would do anything to make sure she was safe.

He was a few feet away from the house when he collided with a hysterical Dawn. He inwardly cursed. Dawn’s appearance meant only one thing. Buffy had found Angelus and was facing off with him that very minute.

“Spike!” Dawn sobbed, clinging to him as if she was afraid he’d disappear. “Spike! It’s Buffy! You have to get to her! You have to save her! Oh god, it’s all my fault! She told me not to go out by myself and as always…”

“Niblet, take me there. Show me where they are. The sooner I find them the better,” Spike took a step back, holding her at arms length. There was no more time for hysterics. He had to find Buffy now! “Can you show me?”

Dawn nodded, sniffling back her tears, knowing that she had to be brave now. Brave for not only herself, but for her sister as well. “Yes. Follow me. But Spike…Angelus…he wasn’t alone. I saw him talking with this…thing…I guess he was some kind of vampire because he had fangs. He was bald and he…”
“Looked like a bloody bat?” Spike asked, his dread growing at the description. He hoped to the powers that be that Dawn wasn’t describing who he thought she was describing…if she was…then they were all in for a world of trouble.

Dawn nodded, a bit surprised that Spike summed up his description so simply. “They were talking about the slayer. Angelus kept calling him master. Who is he Spike? What does he want with Buffy?”

“Fuck! That bloody wanker resurrected
The Master!” Spike let go of Dawn and began to pace.

“The Master?”

“Head of our line. The sire of Darla, Angelus’s sire. The vampire that killed Buffy the first time, and if we don’t hurry, he’ll kill her again! Hurry. Take me to where you were held and pray that Angelus didn’t get an upper hand on your sister. I don’t even want to think of what could be happening to her if he did.”

Her face ten shades of pale, Dawn nodded and took off back to the park, knowing that Spike was right behind her and would save her sister. No matter what.

Chapter 10

Buffy finally woke up to find herself in some sort of cabin, her hands bound in chains that extended down from the ceiling. What the hell? Where was she and why was she still alive? Where was Angelus? Where was Spike? Was he out looking for her? Was he confronting Angelus that very minute? Was any of them going to get out of this alive? Buffy closed her eyes and pushed all of those questions back for a later date. They could wait. What couldn’t wait was a way out of these chains. She cursed as she pulled on them without any effect. Obviously the chains were strong. She wasn’t going anywhere…yet.

“Angelus! Come out here?! What? Couldn’t keep a girl with you without chaining her up?!” Buffy sneered, her anger growing by the second, but all that anger turned to terror when it wasn’t Angelus that stepped out of the darkest corner of the cabin…but the one vampire that she had hoped never to set eyes on again. “No…you’re dead. I killed you….”

The Master just grinned cruelly as he approached the chained slayer. He licked his lips in memory of the sweet elixir of her blood. So full of power and strength. The power that had obviously increased now that he looked into her eyes. She was the strongest of them all and soon, she’d be a part of his family, ready to wreck havoc on this pitiful world. “It has been too long, my sweet. And how you’ve changed from that scared little girl. Now you’re a woman and ready for the gift.”
“Gift?” Buffy frowned, trying again to yank the chains from the ceiling as The Master stepped behind her. “What gift could you possibly have that I’d want?”

Another gleeful laugh. Buffy’s skin prickled with goose bumps as he ran his cold hands down her arm and back up to her neck, pushing her hair aside. “I didn’t say anything about you wanting it. Actually, it’ll be a gift that your sweet William will give you. Once he arrives to save the one slayer he couldn’t kill.”
Buffy really wasn’t liking the sound of this. A gift that Spike could give her? He had already given her everything. There was no more to give…unless…horrified understanding filled her senses. She suddenly knew what The Master had planned and her heart broke, knowing that as of now, there was no way for her to stop it.

“I’m wanting my family back. I have Angelus…but sadly William has deviated from the line by intentionally regaining his soul. Turning you will break the boy. Corrupt that ‘good and noble’ permanent soul that you had him regain. He will see what his true place is and join me.”

“Spike will never join you! Soul or no soul. He was never one for following orders. I’m surprised that Angelus didn’t share that with you. As for turning me. He wouldn’t. He’d never do that to me.”

“If he had no choice he would,” The Master grinned evilly, sliding his tongue down her neck, tasting the salt of her skin. Ah, she was totally delicious. “It’s amazing what a man would do for love. And you, my dear…I think you shall be my favorite. A turned slayer. The power of both. Unstoppable. Soulless and evil.”

“No. H-he won’t…he…”

“Have no choice. Now my dear…relax. This will only hurt for a second,” The Master grinned before sinking his teeth into Buffy’s neck. She screamed and silently prayed that Spike would refuse to turn her. That he was strong enough to resist what ever The Master planned to use against him. Turning her would destroy him completely. . She felt consciousness leave her once again as she prayed to TPTB that Spike wouldn’t find her. That he’d go far away and take all her slayers with him.

~*~

The image of Buffy in a lifeless heap before The Master kept running through Spike’s head, urging him onward. This was it. Tonight Angelus was going to be gone for good. Hopefully Red would have restored his soul in time enough to save Buffy…but if it came to staking the elder vampire…he would. No question about it. He’ll do the deed and he’ll do it with a song in his heart. Nobody hurt his slayer and got to live. Nobody.

Dawn stopped in her tracks and pointed to towards the woodsy area ahead. It was dark and foreboding. It was as if the combined evil of Angelus and The Master had saturated the place. “There! They were in there. Follow me!” The girl continued on the path. Spike wondered if he should just tell her go back, but he wasn’t sure if she’d listen. Dawn was never one for doing the smart thing.

Angelus was waiting for them when they arrived. His smile told of victory and darkness and his eyes…they made Spike’s blood run cold with an oh so familiar gleam. A gleam he had only seen in his early years of a vampire. If he lost…if Angelus got the best of him…no. That wasn’t going to happen. He wouldn’t allow it. Red was restoring the soul right that minute. So whatever plans Angelus had in store for him…they would have to remain unfulfilled. First thing first. He wanted Dawn out and away from danger. He couldn’t fight his best and worry about her too.

“Niblet…go on. Get out of here. I’ll take care of brood boy here,” Spike didn’t take his eyes off the elder vampire. If he looked away, Angelus would grab Dawn and use her as leverage against him. He couldn’t have that either.

“Leave? But what about Buffy? Where is she? Maybe I can go find…” Dawn began to protest. She couldn’t leave without Buffy. Wherever she was, she was in trouble she knew that. She could feel it. It was as if they were still on top of Glory’s tower and Buffy was about to jump again. “Spike please. Let me stay. I can find Buffy and help her.”

Angelus began to laugh. He couldn’t help it. The two of them were just so pathetic. Spike thinking that he can beat him and Dawn…thinking that she could help her sister when it was already too late. There was no help to be had for the slayer. He just loved watching them flounder like this.

“Listen Niblet. I need you gone. I can’t fight and save Buffy and have to worry about you as well. Wherever Buffy is, I’ll find her and bring her home. I promise. Now go. Go tell Red to hurry with that spell,” Spike pushed Dawn behind him, straightening his shoulders as he readied himself for the fight.

“But…”

“You should listen to Spike, Dawnie. Because I’ve already eaten your sister. After I’m done with William here, I’m coming for you. So if I was you…I’d run,” Angelus leered at her.

“I’m not scared of you!” Dawn yelled, tears of determination in her eyes. “Spike please…”

“Bloody hell, Dawn get out of here!” Spike growled, losing his patience. If she didn’t leave now, he’ll eat her himself.

“Promise you’re bring Buffy home,” Dawn’s voice was small and scared. She knew Spike was angry with her, but she needed to be reassured. She had lost her sister once…she couldn’t lose her again…not when she may have been able to stop it.

Spike’s voice softened, his anger fading from him. He could never remain angry with Dawn for long. Now was no exception. “Promise. Now, get out of here, pet. Don’t make me tell you again.”
Dawn nodded, trusting in Spike’s ability to best Angel. He always kept his promises. He said he would save Buffy. Well then he would. There was no doubt in her mind. “I love you, Spike,” She whispered before turning and dashing back to the apartment complex, hoping that Willow had the spell done in time.

“How touching,” Angelus grinned, stepping forward. His eyes ran down Spike’s body, remembering the years when he could force the younger vamp into submission. He couldn’t wait to do that again. To have that much power over someone else…it was like a drug. William had been like a drug that he had not wanted to kick. If it hadn’t been for Darla and that damned gypsy curse…”Waste of time though. I’m going to eat her for dessert after I’m done with the main course.”

“You son of a bitch. You’re not going to come near her ever again. It’s over Angelus. It ends now. Tell me where the slayer is and I’ll make it quick,” Spike’s fingers wrapped around the wooden stake in his pocket, muscles tensed to spring into action. Oh yes. His sire was going down tonight.

Angel laughed darkly, his eyes still moving over Spike in dark desire. “You’re too late. She’s meat for the beast now boy. You might as well give up and give in. The slayer is no more and now you’re…”

With a furious roar, Spike attacked, throwing punches and high kicks, taking advantage of Angelus’s surprise…but that shock didn’t last for long. With a left hook, the tables were turned. Angelus’s fist pounded into Spike, knocking him back to a bench a few paces behind him. All too soon, Angelus spun Spike around and had him pinned down to the bench. Spike gripped the bench, hoping to knock Angelus off, but all movement stopped when he felt Angelus’s erection press against his back.

“Been a long time, hasn’t it Spikie. Time for old traditions to resume,” Angelus whispered into his childe’s ear, unzipping his pants. He had waited years for a chance at this. At last, he was getting what he had wanted for so long. “Now be a good boy and stay still.”

Spike closed his eyes, as he felt Angelus grip his jeans. He had hoped that Willow had the spill all ready to go by now. Obviously, she wasn’t able to do it, and now Spike was about to again experience the humiliation of Angelus. A humiliation that he had tried to forget. He bit his lip, waiting for Angelus to enter him, but it never happened. Just as the brunette had Spike’s pants down, the spell hit. Angelus flew off of Spike and layed in a heap, gasping for air. Spike got up and looked into a pair of tortured brown eyes. Angel. He was back and obviously knew what he had just done. Thank the powers! Red’s spell worked just in the nick of time.

“Oh god, Spike,” the elder vamp got to his feet, his hands trembling. “I-I’m so sorry…I…”

“Save it Peaches,” Spike pulled his pants back up and did the required adjustments, not daring to look at Angel. After what happened here…he didn’t know if he could even look Angel in the eye again. But that wasn’t important right now. Finding Buffy before The Master did something to her was important. Everything else had to be pushed to the back burner. “We need to get to Buffy. Now. Take me to her.”

Angel’s face went ten more shades of pale as he remembered resurrecting The Master and handing the slayer over to the despot to do with as he pleased. Spike was definitely going to kill him…that is if he didn’t kill himself. All he could do now was follow Spike’s orders and take him to the abandoned building where The Master and Angelus had set up shop. “Follow me.”

&#The trek to The Master’s lair was silent and full of tension. Angel had the need to beg for forgiveness. A number of times Angel opened his mouth to apologize for what he had done to Buffy and for what he had almost done to Spike, but then closed it again, thinking that Spike didn’t want to hear anything he had to say. Which he couldn’t blame him for. After all, it was his alter ego that had risen The Master.

Spike needed avoidance, good spot of violence, and to find his slayer safe and alive. He had to believe that she was ok. It was the only thing that kept him going right now. He had made a promise and he was going to keep it. He was going to bring his slayer back to the people that loved her. Nothing was going to stop her. Not even The bloody Master.

“Here,” Angel stopped in front of a boarded up building. From the outside the building looked deserted, but both vampires sensed differently. The scent of evil surrounded them. “I took her here. To the basement with The Master.”

“Son of…,” Spike stopped and took a deep breath. Anger was not going to get him Buffy back. He needed to remain calm and refrain from any violence against Angel. “Ok. Let’s go in and get Buffy and get out.”

All plans to be calm went out the window when a bloodcurdling scream came from the basement. Both Spike and Angel raced into the house and down into the basement to find The Master draining Buffy. Her eyes were wide in terror as a red streak of blood ran down her neck.

Spike’s horror and despair was all consuming. For a moment, he was frozen, his mind denying the sight before him. No. This couldn’t be happening. She loved him back…they had just consummated their relationship, not a few hours before. This couldn’t be happening…not to his Buffy. Not to the woman he loved. “Nooo!” He screamed as the light in her eyes began to fade. He rushed to her as The Master retracted his fangs out of her neck and let her body fall to the floor in a lifeless heap.

“Buffy, no,” Spike pulled her into his arms. Her brushed golden strands of hair out of her face and sighed in relief as he noticed that she was still alive…barely.

“Spike?” She blinked the tears out of her eyes, wanting to get a clear picture of him. “You came…”

“Of course I did, pet. Should know that I wouldn’t let these wankers get you without a fight.”

More tears. They were leaving her, just as quickly as the blood flowing from her neck. He pressed his hand to the wounds, trying to keep the little blood she had left inside of her. “Shhh, Luv. You’ll be ok. We got Angel back and now we’ll get you back home, as good as new.”

Buffy’s grip on his hand was growing weaker by the second, her voice had no strength at all. She was dying and they both knew it. All Spike could do was hold her and try to be strong for her. Wouldn’t do to break down when she needed him to be strong now more then ever. “I didn’t want you to have to stake Angelus…I…”

“Shhh, pet. I know. Save your strength, Luv. You’re gonna need it,” Spike placed a gentle finger against her lips that were now as pale as he was.

Angel watched them from the doorway, glaring at the Master that was circling them, probably contemplating his next move. Angel looked around for something wooden. He wanted to send the despot back to the hell he came from, but sadly nothing wooden was in sight. Darkly, he wondered if he could take The Master himself. After all, he was the one that resurrected him. It would make perfect sense. Just a simple twist of the head, and the old vampire was dust. His mind made up, Angel stepped forward but came to a stop when the master took his fist and knocked Spike unconscious. He was even more dismayed to watch The Master take Spike’s wrist and slit it with his fangs, causing blood to swell to the surface, and press the bleeding wrist to Buffy’s mouth.

“Nooo!” Angel howled as he watched the Master force Buffy to swallow Spike’s blood. His soul died just then, knowing what was to come. Buffy would rise a monster and Spike wouldn’t have the strength to kill her. Neither would he.

The master stared at Angel, evil glee in his eyes. “Ah, Angel has reawakened. Too bad. I shall return for what’s mine,” he glanced down at both Buffy and Spike and disappeared as fast as lightning, just as Angel made a move to rip his heart out. Angel came to a stop in front of Buffy and Spike, his heart crying out in despair. Spike will awaken soon enough and as for Buffy…best to get her back to the apartments and talk decide what to do then.

Looking at her, one would think that Buffy was a sleeping angel. Capable of only light and love. But Angel knew better. When this angel awoke, she would be a creature of darkness and blood with the power of two demons. And Spike…his repentant childe…he would never forgive himself for this deed. He would want to meet the sun or demand that one of the others stake him. But Angel will not allow that to happen. If they were going to get through this…they were going to need Spike. Sinking down to the floor, Angel waited for Spike to wake up and darkness to fall. They had a week. After a week, Buffy will awaken and if she was soulless…there will be no stopping her.

11

The sounds of waves crashing against each other was what woke Buffy out of the deep darkness that had over came her. She blinked against the light of the sun shining above as she sat up to take in her surroundings. A beach. However did she get there? The last time she checked, she was in a cabin, dying in her lover’s arms.

“It’s beautiful here, isn’t it? I always loved the ocean. When we left LA, I made sure that there was always a beach in the vicinity,” Joyce Summers sat next to her daughter, dressed in a white sundress with a serene smile, softening her features.

“Mom?” Buffy’s eyes widened. She had thought she’d never see her mother again. Tears spilling from her eyes, Buffy buried herself into her mother’s embrace. She was a little girl again, held safe in her mother’s arms. “It’s really you.”

“Of course it’s me, sweetie,” Joyce chuckled. “Who else would it be? That horrible first slayer you’ve been talking to?”

Buffy could only shrug as sobs overtook her. She had missed this so much. Over the past few years, all she had wanted was to set with her mother and be reassured that she was doing the right thing. She wanted to be held by her mother again. Safe, warm, and happy. “God, I’ve missed you so much. I can’t believe that we’re together again.”

“I’ve missed you too sweetie. Both you and Dawn. I’ve sat up here and watched you both. So many times, I wanted to reach out and help you. Even if it was only holding your hand or fixing a hot cup of chocolate.”

Buffy could only smile and look around at her surroundings. It was beautiful here. Calm. Peaceful. Happy. She was in heaven again. At last, she could rest. “It’s beautiful here.”

“Yes it is. And you have a choice that you have to make.”

Buffy frowned. What did she mean by that? “I don’t understand.”

Joyce only smiled and got to her feet, motioning for Buffy to follow. In silence, they walked to the edge of the ocean. Joyce took her daughter’s hand and had her look into the water. “Look deep, Buffy and watch what happened just as you were dying. Look at what you don’t remember.”

Buffy frowned as she followed her mother’s directions. She didn’t know what the use of this was. A choice? Wasn’t it obvious that her choice was to stay with her mother? To be at peace once again? Buffy’s frown deepened as the waters cleared to show Spike, Angel, the Master, and herself. She gasped in outrage as the Master knocked Spike unconscious, and gasped in shock as The despot forced Spike’s blood down her throat. There was only one outcome to come of this. She was going to be turned. A vampire with both vamp and slayer strength. She was now a demon that would be impossible to defeat. Just what The Master had wanted.

“Oh god,” Buffy turned away, her stomach lurching in desperation. This could not be happening. A demon was now setting up shop in her body and she was stuck here, unable to stop it. She closed her eyes, trying to swallow down her grief at the situation. All those slayers…they were all going to die and by her hand. Not even Spike would be able to stop her.

“Shhh, baby,” Joyce wrapped her daughter in her arms, turning her away from the scene below. “It’s not as bad as it seems…”

Buffy looked at her mother in disbelief. How could she say such a thing? Of course it was as bad as it seemed. Her friends were in danger…Dawn was in danger! And she knew that Spike wouldn’t have the strength to stop her. He was unable, both physically and emotionally! “What do you mean? Of course it’s as bad! They’re all going to die and there’s nothing I can do to stop it!”

“You can go back,” Joyce looked in her daughter’s eyes, pushing her hair away from her eyes. “That’s the choice, sweetie. You can stay here and enjoy eternal peace, or…the powers can return your soul to your body and you can enjoy eternal life. It’s your choice.”

“What? They call that a choice? Stay here and let my nearest and dearest die, or return to be a vampire and come back to heaven again? What kind of choice is that?”

“One that is totally up to you. Baby…The Powers have smiled down on you. Not only will they return you to your body…but they will return you with a gift for you and the two vampires that love you. Especially for Spike. They want to reward him for not only saving the world, but for having the guts to love the slayer so much, that he went out to make himself a better man.”

“But…I can never come back.”

“Only if you die. As you well know…even vampires aren’t forever. Baby…what do you want to do?”

Buffy looked at her mother, then turned back to the ocean, that contained the situation down below. The answer was obvious. She wouldn’t be able to rest in peace, knowing that she left her friends to die. She had to go back. “When are they going to send me back.”

Joyce kissed her daughter’s forehead, and gazed at her with the love she held in her heart. Her Buffy…her beautiful girl…so full of goodness and light. She was so proud of her. “Soon.”

~*~

Spike groaned he woke up, his head pounding. He felt as if he had been ran over by a truck. What had happened to him anyway? All he could remember was holding Buffy as she…as she died. Buffy. Where was she? Was she still alive? Did the Master finish her off? What of Angel? Where was he? That question was quickly answer when a hand gently clasped his arm, and pulled him to his feet.

“Bloody hell,” Spike cursed as the room began to spin. “What happened?”

“The Master,” Angel answered, his eyes landing on the form just behind Spike. “We can’t stay here.”

“Buffy?” Where was she? Did that sodden bastard take her? Where was bat face anyway?

Angel couldn’t look at Spike. The news was going to kill him, but there was no choice but to answer the question. “She’s…right behind you.”

He didn’t want to look. He didn’t want to see her broken and lifeless once again. The first time she had died had been more then enough; but he couldn’t help himself. Spike slowly turned around and nearly collapsed at Buffy’s still from on the floor. Holding back his sobs, he lifted her head up into his lap and cradled her there. He couldn’t believe this…she was gone. His beautiful slayer…it wasn’t fair.

“We have to get her out of here. We have a week until she wakes up, but we do not want to be here when the Master returns,” Angel looked away from his sobbing childe, his guilt overwhelming him. All of this was his fault. Him and his stupid soul.

“Wake up?” Spike looked at up at his sire, feeling that Angel as had finally gone over the bend. Their slayer was dead. There was no way that she would wake up ever again.

Angel sighed. He resented this. He shouldn’t have to tell Spike that he had just turned the woman that they both loved. It was going to destroy him. “Spike…The Master…he knocked you out and forced Buffy to drink your blood. You were forced to turn her. When she wakes up…she’ll be a monster.”

Angel winced at Spike’s roar of pain and devastation. He had known that it was coming, but the heartbreak…it was too painful for either of them to bear. He winced as Spike flinched back from him when he tried to comfort him. Of course, he deserved that. After all he did…this was all his fault.

“Spike…we have to go. He have to get her back to slayer central.”

“They’ll kill her,” Spike shook his head, holding on to her even tighter then before.

“She’s a monster now Spike,” Angel sighed.

“She’s my childe. I won’t let them hurt her,” Spike shook his head, glaring up at his sire with determination. “If anyone comes ten feet of her with a stake, I’ll kill them. I bloody swear I will.”

Angel sighed. He knew this would happen. Spike was blinded by the familiar face. The younger vampire wouldn’t have the strength to stop Buffy’s rising, and neither did he. Maybe some time will make Spike see reason. What was important right now was getting as far out of reach of the Master as possible. “Ok. Fine. But we have to get out of here. She’ll be the strongest vampire ever. We can’t let The Master get to her.

Wiping his tears, Spike nodded. Angel was right. They couldn’t stay here. Getting to his feet, he scooped Buffy’s limp body into his arms and wordlessly walked out of the cabin, Angel right behind him. Neither of them noticed the blood-red eyes glaring after them from the darkness.

~*~

A hush fell over the apartment complex as Spike entered, carrying the dead slayer in his arms. He didn’t talk or look at anyone. He just simply stared straight ahead and disappeared into his room, locking the door behind him. Angel came in next, his eyes dimmed with a mixture of grief and guilt.

“Angel?” Wesley stepped in front of his boss, his voice was full of caution and concern.

“It’s me, Wes. Angelus is gone,” and so is Buffy, Angel thought to himself as he moved deeper into the complex, trying to ignore the cautious glares of the slayers that didn’t know him. He didn’t blame them for being wary. After all…it was only yesterday that he had been aiming to kill them all.

“What’s wrong with Buffy?” The question came from Willow. Her eyes were on the door that Spike had carried Buffy through and her voice was full of fear. She knew. Somehow she knew that something was wrong. Angel just didn’t know how she was going to take the news.

“Angel…answer me. What’s going on with Buffy? Why is she unconscious? Why did Spike look so…determined?”

“The master…he drained her…,” Angel lowered his head even more.

“What?” Dawn gasped, clinging to Willow’s hand, her eyes wide with oncoming grief. “But she’s ok, right? I mean…she’ll wake up and be Buffy again…right?”

Angel shook his head, cursing himself once again. This wasn’t right. He should be bringing the eldest Summers girl home alive and well and ready to train more slayers. He shouldn’t be there, about to tell the teenager that the body they brought home was no longer her sister.

“Dawn…Willow…the master not only drained her…when we arrived he knocked Spike unconscious and then…he cut Spike and forced her to drink his blood.”

“But wait,” a blond slayer stepped up. “That can’t be. If she’s been drained, and if she drank Spike’s blood…that means that she’ll wake up as a vampire.”

Angel looked away from the group. Ashamed that he had caused this to happen…ashamed that there was nothing he could do to stop it.

“No,” Dawn shook her head, stepping away from Willow, glaring at Angel angrily. “You’re lying. Spike would never…”

“Spike had no choice in the matter. He was unconscious. This was all forced on the both of them.”

“Goddess,” Willow shook her head, tears in her eyes. She remembered the first year in Sunnydale when all their nightmares had came true. Becoming a vampire was one of Buffy’s fears and now…

“No!” Dawn ran to her room, slamming the door behind her. She didn’t want to be around anyone. In fact, she hated them all for not saving her sister. It wasn’t fair!

“Wes…Spike and I…we’re not going to have the strength to…”

Wes just nodded, already knowing what Angel was asking. “I’ll do it. Don’t worry. I’ll make it as quick as possible.” He knew that this was hard for his friend. He had loved Buffy with his whole heart, and to lose her like this…it was destroying him.

“But what about Spike?” Willow asked. “I have a feeling that he’s not going to let anyone near enough to do that.”
“Spike’s not thinking straight right now. We have a week until she awakes. I’ll work on him then. For right now…we’ll just let him be,” If Spike even listened to him…especially after what he had almost done. Angel shivered at the thought. True, he had always wanted the younger vampire. He wanted to insert his dominance and demand respect that his age demanded, but he had never wanted to take it by force. How could he look Spike in the eye ever again.

“I’ll go try to talk to Spike. Make him see reason,” Wesley sighed, walking towards the apartment he shared with the rest of the LA crew when a bright luminance light blocked his path. Everyone shielded their eyes and gasped when the light faded to reveal Cordelia Chase. Former schoolmate of the Scooby gang and lost love of Angel. Nobody knew how to react to this sudden appearance but stare.

Angel was frozen. She was all he could see. All he could think about. Cordelia. The woman he had loved…the woman he had failed to save from Jasmine’s twisted games. She was here and walking towards him, gentle annoyance in her features.

“Seesch! One would think you people have never seen a spirit before!” Cordelia rolled her eyes and crossed her arms as she stood before her former boss. “Get a grip people!”

“Cordy…y-you’re dead,” Angel stammered, not daring to believe that she was really there this time.

“Duh! You pretty much have to be to become a spiritual guide sent from the powers!”
“Spiritual guide?” Willow frowned, deeply confused.

“Yeah. I’m here to guide Angel and Spike in this quest to destroy The Master. I’m also here to tell you not to stake the slayer. The powers have seen fit to return her soul…minus the happiness clause and with a few gifts for our resident vamps with souls,” Cordelia explained, walking to the center of the room, so she could really be the center of attention. “There’s a big battle to be fought and you’re going to need all three of them. So don’t stake her. Do I make myself clear?”

“Are you…are you her guide too?” Angel asked, feeling a bit discombobulated at the moment. Souls, spirit guides, the powers…it was all little much to take in. And Cordelia! His Cordy! Right in the same room, only a few feet away…close enough to touch…he needed a minute to take it all in.

“Please! Like I’d have the patience to be little Miss. I’m the Slayer hear me roar’s guide. No. That job falls to the patience of Joyce,” Cordy shrugged.

The room fell into shocked silence. Finally one of the slayers broke the silence with one simple statement.

“Cool.”

~*~

Spike sat at the far corner of the room, his eyes fixed on the still form resting under his covers. He had barely left her side in the past seven days. He just stared at her, sometimes he even held her hand, but mostly he kept his distance and stared at her closed eyes. He would think of her final day alive. How they had declared their love and consummated the feelings all in the same hour. He remembered the indescribable joy he had felt as she let him into her body and held him close. He remembered how her eyes had promised him a lifetime of love and happiness.

Memories. That was all Spike had of her now.. Once she woke up and found herself the one thing she had feared becoming…and that he was responsible…she’ll hate him forever. He’ll never be that close to her again. The love that he had held in his hand only for a moment would be out of his reach forever.

Getting to his feet, he walked to the mirror that stood against the wall and looked at the seemingly empty room reflected. It was time. She’ll be waking soon. She’ll wake up, still Buffy, but back to hating him for what he had allowed to happen. With a roar, he slammed his fist into the mirror, sending sharp shards of glass down to the soft carpet below.

Buffy clutched the sheets with her empty hand as she woke up to the sounds of breaking glass. It had been a lovely stay with her mother. They had walked along the beach and talked about Dawn, life, and Buffy’s own plans for the future once the trouble was over. The only thing Buffy could bring herself to talk about was Spike. How she loved him more then she had ever loved anything before and how she couldn’t wait to be with him again. She spoke of taking him to the beach and making love among the crashing waves of the ocean. Of wrestling with him in the sunlight, letting the soft rays warm their skin…and then…her mother was gone and she was lost in darkness. And now…she was waking up to the sounds of breaking glass and heartbreaking sobs.

Frowning, Buffy sat up and looked at Spike’s shaking shoulders as he sobbed into his hands, so devastated. Her heart broke for him. All she wanted to do was pull him into her arms and make it all better. Careful not to make a sound, Buffy pulled back the covers and got out of the bed. For once, she was going to be there for Spike. There was going to be no more taking and giving nothing back. That part of their relationship was over. For now on…she was going to be what Spike deserved. Without a sound, she walked up to Spike, her mind only on one thing. Getting him to open up to her. One way, or another.