***All of the characters and places from the Buffy-verse are the property of the writers, actors and Fox. This is just my take on their work and they are in no way responsible for anything said or implied by myself.

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Los Angeles, the city of Angels had to be the biggest lie she had ever heard, Buffy thought pushing her way through the flocks of sinners who haunted her club every night. The River Styx had a reputation for loud music, stiff drinks and the perfect place to fill your darkest desires. Vampires, demons and humans alike filled her place to capacity each night and that proved to her mind that there were more demons than angels in LA these days.

Since Vampires and other demons had convinced the ACLU to take their case for civil rights and liberties to the supreme court they were now considered to be the same as humans in the eyes of the law. They had grown tired of skulking in the shadows and in the year 3000 they had decided it was time to step into the light...metaphorically of course. At first the general populace hadn’t been to thrilled to discover that the monsters from the horror movies had come to life but once they learned that eternal life was no longer a myth but a reality, they had been more than willing to welcome them into the world.

There were rules of course, you had to be twenty-one before you could legally become a vampire or other half breed and there were also drawbacks as well. The biggest one being that any preternatural creature who takes a human life by either murder or siring someone under the legal age of consent, were issued a death sentence. No trial, no chance to explain themselves just their name placed on the top of an order of execution.

Which is where Buffy came in. She was a legally recognized slayer with the full backing of the law behind her. Her mother had been human but her father had more than a few demons in his gene pool. Hank Summers had actually been Har’tuh one of the most feared hell gods of the mortal globe...a little fact he failed to mention to his wife. He had the ability to assume a human form but when she had been born it hadn’t taken her mother long to realize she was different than other girls. She healed faster than humans and had the strength and reflexes of a demon.

Demons had been legalized for more than a few years by then and Joyce, not being a fool confronted her husband about his less than human ancestry. He admitted his deception but explained that he should not have been able to create a child, which was why he hadn’t told her about his true nature. Some demons or half breeds like werewolves could mate with humans but hell gods were immortals.

Not immortal like vampires wished they were but truly immortal, as in can’t be killed by any means. Stab them, poison them and cut them into tiny little bits and they won’t die. Their bodies simply regenerate and then you have one ticked off demon with unbelievable power on your hands. But If they displeased their vessel of power or the one who elevated them in the first place, most of their demon gifts are stripped away.

Other demons called them the fallen ones, because they were doomed to live until the end of time never able to return to their place of glory. Living forever had it’s drawbacks and most of the fallen ones, locked themselves away in tombs like the ancient pharaoh's of old, as an act of penance for proving to be unworthy of their godhead.

Har’tuh wasn’t exactly the repentant type and he had used what powers he still possessed to make a new name for himself. Hank Summers was already a regular on the Fortune 500 list by the time he had met Joyce, and he got there by ruling the business world of high finance just like you would expect an ex-hell god would...ruthlessly. He had fallen for Joyce because she was homespun in the best sense of the word. True to her nature she forgave him for his lies and accepted the fact that her child was truly a miracle.

But little did she know a rare form of cancer had snuck into her brain eating away her life silently. By the time they discovered it was there, it was too late. She died when Buffy had been three, showing Hank another drawback of immortality..human mortality. Until he had met Joyce, he had formed no attachments to humans and her death had destroyed him in a way losing his powers hadn‘t. No one except for Joyce had known his true name and he feared that if it was discovered the enemies of his past would use his child to obtain their revenge. Fearing her safety he sent her away to live with his business associates Jana and Rupert Giles in London.

Jana or Jenny as she liked to be called, was a part of the old world thanks to her gypsy heritage and an accomplished Technopagan who monitored all of his business computers for preternatural booby traps. Her husband Rupert was a renowned expert in all things preternatural and was often called upon to give his opinions when arranging deals with demons. Confident that they were the only people equipped to raise the daughter of a fallen one, he had given them his parental rights and the truth about his identity.

They had raised her like their own child, and she had always believed that they were her true parents. Atleast until she turned sixteen. That was the year an enterprising journalist from the New York Times had somehow discovered the truth about Hank Summers and the fact he had a child. His story not only broke the news to the world but also to his daughter. When she had read the article that mentioned her by her first name only and showed a picture of her playing in the park with her mother, the careful cocoon of normalcy and safety her father and the Giles’s had tried to give her shattered.

Demons came out of the woodwork making nearly each day a constant battle for survival. By the time she was seventeen most demons had learned that she not someone they wanted to mess with and her reputation somehow reached the ears of the demonic taskforce. The Initiative, recognizing her skills offered her a job. She spent the next five years traveling the globe taking out hostile demons, further increasing her reputation, despite the fact that it was a Black Ops organization.

There were no secrets that could be kept from the demon world but not once did her father ever try to contact her. When she turned twenty-one he had bestowed upon her a large trust fund but still never bothered to meet her face to face. A year later she had retired to LA, planning on making a life for herself that didn’t include demons and bloodshed but fate had other ideas. A gang of vampires chose that year to make their presence known by massacring innocents nightly. For seven nights the streets ran with blood and the bodies began piling up and then the local preternatural task force had come to her asking for help.

She had wanted to refuse, but she couldn’t, not after watching the faces of the victims flashed on the news each night. She agreed to a one time deal only and they gave her the full authority of a slayer. She and the rest of the team dealt with them but since once you were a slayer your authority never expired, they tended to call her in when things became to much for them to handle. Since she could never say no, she finally understood that her life would never be ordinary.

Like it or not demons were a part of her life so instead of running away from that fact, she opened The River Styx instead. In Greek mythology the river served as a crossroads where the world of the living met the world of the dead and the world of the mortal met the world of the immortal. In short it was the perfect name for a nightclub that not only welcomed demons but was run by the daughter of a fallen one. For her patrons it was a place to visit the underworld in relative safety and for her it was a way to bring both her worlds together.

Now at twenty-five she owned one of the hottest clubs in LA and every once in awhile she helped mankind by slaying some big nasty blight on humanity who didn‘t understand that humans weren‘t happy meals with legs any more. All in all it worked for her.

She walked over to the bar to check up on her bartenders. “How’s it going tonight Xand?”

“We’re running low on blood and Jack but everything else is running around usual.” He told her never breaking his rhythm.

“Damn it Xander, it’s your job to handle this shit.”

“Don’t worry Willy’s going to drop us off a couple cases to get us through the night and the full order will be delivered tomorrow before we open. The Jack’s not going to make it, so we’re running the whisky sours at half price and offering dollar draws.” He explained, pouring shots.

“Did you ever think about calling the supplier like you did Willy?” She asked sliding behind the bar to help.

“Yeah well humans aren’t really afraid of me since they know I can’t kill them, so no luck there.” He admitted.

“Let’s go back to the office.” She said before pointing to one of the other bartenders, letting them know that they needed to take Xander‘s place.

They made their way through the crowd with ease and headed into her office. The club itself was painted in deep burgundies and solid blacks because it was expected but her office reflected her own sense of style. The walls were painted the color of the ocean at night when only the stars and moon keep it a deep blue instead of an inky black. All of the furniture was the color of aged driftwood while the fabric on the sofa and chairs was the true beige of fresh sand. Instead of carpet she had gone with marble floors with thin rivers of light blues running through it. Just like the soundproofing it had cost a pretty penny but it had been worth it to create a perfect haven from noise and jostling bodies outside.

She walked around her desk and picked up the phone. She punched in the number to their liquor supplier and motioned for Xander to have a seat. After going through several peons and all of the upper management she finally found herself talking to the boss. “This is Buffy out at The River Styx and my manager just informed me that your company can’t send over a few cases of Jack Daniels to get us through the night.”

“I’m sorry Ms. Summers but we close shop at 5 pm and if we make an exception for you then our other clients will expect the same treatment.”

“But this club isn’t like your other clients now is it? We send some serious money your way and if you can’t make an exception for us every once in a while, then I bet one of your competitors will.” Buffy told him coldly. She listened to him a few moments longer and then hung up the phone. “Send a couple of boys out back to meet the truck.”

“Okay lesson learned.” Xander told her seriously impressed at how she handled the situation. His boss didn’t take shit from nobody and he respected that. Especially since she was part human. He got to his feet smoothly, his leather jacket rustling softly against the natural fibers of the chair.

“Just remember Xand, the trick to dealing with humans in the business world is the threaten them where it hurts…the bank account. We’re one of the premier clubs in the area and there are lots of suppliers more than willing to take his place.” Buffy told him simply. “But you did a good job with Willy and you handled the shortage well. In this business you’ve got to be able to adjust to any situation quickly and so far you’ve been handling that pretty well.”

“Thanks boss.” Xander said with a nod. He was the recently dead, less than five years and his mind was still adjusting to the change. It takes awhile to forget that your not human anymore and despite contrary belief vamps don’t rise from their graves with the inherited knowledge of their sire. Just like growing up as a human there was a lot of learning involved and learning had never exactly been his strong point.

He was never going to be a master anything which is why he was determined to do a great job here. “Anything else you need?”

“Yeah could you send…” She changed her mind mid sentence. She had planned on doing some paperwork but she had this sudden desire to get lost in the crowd for a while. “You know what I’ll just talk to her later.”

She got up and followed Xander out breathing in the atmosphere. The main dance floor in the center glowed like a single bright candle and the further you walked away the darker the place became. It was a place that made you feel sexy and adventurous like everything you could never let yourself experience or admit to during the light of day was suddenly possible and not only was it accepted it was expected. This wasn’t one of those phony places straight out of a bad B movie, it was decadently elegant and unabashedly sensual. The booths were covered in the finest leather the velvet backed chairs and sofas had been imported from Italy, giving it the old world flair that the master vampires appreciated. But the live bands she hired were on the cutting edge of modern music which pulled in the young and upwardly mobile executives looking for a place to unwind.

The second story on the other hand was brightly illuminated with hundreds of tiny fairy lights and it was a place of brushed silk wall coverings and a color palette that was as light and pale as the main floor was dark and vivid. It was done in the softest creams and the faintest pinks and blues and to reach it you had to walk up one of the two burnished silver staircases that spiraled upward with delicate curves and bends. Giving one the allusion of ascending to place of innocence and light. It had a bar made entirely of white marble with gold filigree accents that covered it like the feather stokes of an angel’s wings. The second floor was for those a little unsure of the delights awaiting them down in the dark.

Tonight she felt like indulging in the wicked temptations of the dark. She wanted to dance, feel the other bodies in the room pressing around her like a velvet glove. It was oddly intimate to writhe in the dark with virtual strangers surrounding you. Their breath forcing itself out of their lips and across your skin as they exerted their bodies to the music pumping around them like a mother’s heartbeat. Feeling leather behind you while on another side there was velvet, lace or silk. The mixing and clashing of the perfumes and colognes surrounding you, filling your lungs with every scent imaginable. All of your senses were stimulated at the same time and since she wasn’t into chemical recreation it was the closest thing to being in a drug induced haze as she would get.

She felt a pair of cool hands circle around her stomach drawing her closer from behind. Normally she would have pulled away, she preferred dancing alone, but she felt an excited shiver of desire trace its way down her back. It had been awhile since she had felt something even close to desire so she let herself be pulled back against a rock hard chest full of sharp planes and deep valleys.

They danced for a few minutes and she felt his hands turn her around so that they could finally see each other face to face. His hair was a mess of brown curls tinted a violent shade of white blonde at the tips as if he had dyed it all and was now letting the color naturally grow out. She was envious of his impossibly sculpted cheekbones but they suited the sharp angular lines of his face to perfection. But as stunning as his face was, it was his eyes that were truly breathtaking. At the center the were the palest shade of blue she had ever seen and like bleeding ripples of a pond the color deepened as it traveled further away from his pupil. A single scar high on his eyebrow marred the overall perfection of his face but it matched the clothing he wore. He was wearing a nearly floor length black leather duster with tight black jean encasing his long slender legs and narrow waist and a silk shirt the same color as the darkest blue in his eyes. Everything about him screamed, bad boy and she had a weakness for that in a man or a demon.

While she was studying him, he was studying her just as intently. Her golden blonde hair swung freely just beneath her high firm breasts with a few streaks of deep cherry red adding a bit of edge to her. Her face was a soft oval with full pouty lips and eyes the color of fresh grass in spring. She was wearing tight black leather pants that had showcased her tight heart shaped ass to perfection and a shimmery jade green sequined top that tied from behind at the nape of her neck and the center of her back leaving plenty of creamy white skin exposed between and at the sides.

Just looking at her made him hard but all he did was give her a seductive grin. “You like what you see luv?”

She tilted her head to one side and then back to the other like she was thinking over his question. In reality she wanted to see if he tasted as good as he looked but that was a little fast even for her. “You’re not a total waste of my time.”

She was saucy, he liked that in a girl. “I was just thinking the same thing pet. You got a name to go with that attitude?”

Before she could respond she heard a familiar and not to welcome voice call out her name several feet behind her. Schooling her face into a carefully blank mask before turning, she never noticed that the guy across from her had been taken back at the sound of her name. “What you brings you by my den of dissoluteness, Detective Angelus?”

“Buffy we need to talk.” Liam said coming to stand in front of her. His tall thick body was cloaked in his habitual black like a priest, only once upon time Angelus had been quite the bad vampire.

Not executable but a general rebel without a cause. She had met him on the vampire gang case but then he had only been a beat cop with a disregard for anything vaguely even resembling a rule or procedure. She had found that sexier than hell and it wasn’t long before the two of them were tearing up the sheets and burning the damn building around them. He had been her wildest, hottest lover ever until he had a crisis of conscience. A case he was working went sideways and a bunch of runaways ended up dead.

She had been there that night, watching along side him as the coroner grimly tried to piece together the mangled bodies of those kids and she saw something in his eyes fade away as the last body was carried out. That something had been his fire, his passion and it had been replaced by a cold spark of duty forged from his crushing guilt. Even though she understood it on some level, she couldn’t stand the cold. It was like her marrow had frozen in her bones and the cheer was leached out of her life with every moment she was around him.

She tried to be the considerate girlfriend but she woke up one morning realizing she no longer knew the man lying next to her. The man she had loved knew how to separate the job from his life and truly live but this new Liam Angelus was as dry as a eighty year old virgin. If he hadn’t been a vamp she would have said he had found God, but as impossible as that was, he still steered away from anything less than pure as the driven snow. Sex had went from chains and blood play to straight vanilla with the standard missionary position making a nightly appearance. In short she was bored sick after a month but then he did the unforgivable, he asked her to sell her club.

“That place breeds the kind of monsters that kill the innocent. Don’t you see that you are better than that, you don’t belong there Buffy. It‘s a place of sin and you’re a pure soul.” He had told her with a fervor usually reserved for the spokesmen who hock those nifty and amazing gadgets on TV, promising that they can change your life for only five easy payments of $19.95. The ones that work like precision instruments on the commercial and only arrive on your doorstep as cheap plastic in a slick box.

In a pig eye she thought, not getting suckered in to his sales pitch. She had seen how that lifestyle hadn’t magically made his life any better and she had no intentions of buying into it any time soon. She had broken off their year long relationship then and there, which was why she was surprised to see him at the River of all places. “Is there bodies on the ground or is this just a social call.”

“It’s personal, will you come with me outside?”

“Angel if you want to talk to me, you can talk to me inside my club. If you can’t even handle that then we have nothing to say to one another.” She told him flipping her hair back over her shoulders. When his eyes instantly trailed down to her chest, she took a deep breath making her naked breasts strain against the thin fabric of her shirt, just to twist the knife in a little more.

“Why do you have to make things hard?”

She walked over to him, swinging her hips like a well oiled metronome set to a slow swaying adagio. “I thought that was the whole point lover?”

When he realized what she meant, he hastily took a step back like she was covered in slime or leeches, possibly even slime covered leeches. Unable to help herself she laughed, a rich deep sound full of smoky amusement. The same man who taught her to appreciate and ride the thin line between pain and ecstasy was as flustered as bride on her wedding night over nothing more than a weak double entendre. So yeah, she laughed.

Recognizing the look on his face and not in a mood for one of his broody snits, she drew in a deep breath and stifled the rest of her amusement. When she was sure that her smile had turned into a serious line, she spoke to him keeping her voice firm and carefully blank. “It’s obvious we have nothing to say to each other. We just don’t live in each other’s worlds anymore.”

“We could if you wanted it bad enough.” Angel told her, not bothering to reclaim the distance he had put between them.

“You have a lot longer lifespan Angel. Maybe you have a century of your life to waste, indulging your dry as weird grain toast phase but this is my only trip on the merry go round that is a human life. I want the brightly colored lights and the thrill deep inside your stomach as you let go of the pole to reach out your hand and touch the air as it breezes around you. I want to taste life, savor it like spun cotton candy until it melts on my tongue. I don’t intend to miss a moment of it, not for you, not for anyone.” Since she still cared about him, she took some of the sting out of her words with an intimate yet innocent smile.

He watched her for a moment, trying to forget about everything but her and the light in her eyes as she had spoken but he couldn’t. He could feel the air in this place, like a thick cloying cloud of sweat and sin reaching out to touch his flesh. All around him he heard the sounds of bodies pressing together, the sound of leather meeting leather, skin slapping again skin with a thick meaty whap and it disgusted him.

Like the people all around him, like her…he had let himself be a slave to his need to feel. While at the time people had been dying because he was thinking about his dick and not his job. No matter how hard he scrubbed the stain of the blood that he should have stopped from being spilt, would always be on his hands and not even for her would he let there be anymore. He didn’t need anymore ghosts staring back at him with glassy eyes dulled by death asking him why he hadn’t saved them, why he hadn’t protected them.

He knew that he couldn’t save everyone, he was just one man after all, but looking at the woman he loved completely in her element he knew he had to concentrate on the ones he could save. She was the Queen of the Dammed and she would remain in her palace ruling over her wicked court of depravity and nothing he would ever do would convince her to walk away. Saving his breath, he gave her a slight smile and made he was back to his own world.

Relieved that it hadn’t turned into a full out scene, she suddenly remembered the handsome stranger. Turning around, she wasn’t surprised that he had went off to seek his pleasure elsewhere. With no choice but to do the same, she threw herself back into the music with reckless abandon. But a pair of piercing blue eyes never wondered far from her mind.

Spike watched her pick up where she had left off before the Detective had arrived and tried to decide what his next course of action would be. He had come to this place looking for the daughter of Har’tuh and had gotten distracted by a shapely ass. An ass that happened to belong to the girl he was being paid a small fortune to guard with his life. Something told him that his employer, her dear old dad, wouldn’t be to pleased if he learned that he done anything more to her tight little body than protecting it.

After a few more dances, her skin was slicked with a thin sheen of sweat and the night was slowly reaching it’s peak. Which meant it was time to get her ass to work, she thought making her way out of the crowd and over to the staircase. She had installed large fans to the high arched ceiling on the upper floor so that the air was always being stirred. She felt it wash over her erasing some of the heat from her skin and began to scan the crowd for a familiar head of scarlet hair.

Easily picking her out of the crowd she walked over to where her business partner sat quietly talking to a thin man with deep black hair. He was dressed casually a pair of baggy blue jeans and a black printed tee that had a stick man playing a guitar above the word ‘rock star‘ in red. He may look like a college kid but the small print on his shirt happened to be the truth. Daniel Osborne, or just Oz to his friends, was a bonafide rock star. He played guitar for packed venues full of screaming fans, with his band Dingoes ate my baby.

She had been the one to offer them a job playing here four nights a week. Before long word had gotten around, that the next big thing was appearing at the River Styx, nightly. It seemed like they shot to fame overnight, which meant it hadn’t taken long for the media to learn he was a werewolf. There had been other demon musicians and more than a few actors but coupled with his bands moniker there had been a flurry of outraged parents. Desperate to salvage their reputation, his label had called a press conference for a question and answer session. When the first reporter had asked why they had chosen that particular name, Oz looked directly into the camera and said, “I don‘t know? I voted for calling ourselves ‘The baby ate my dingo’ but Devon said that didn’t make any sense.”

Laughing at the memory, she couldn’t help being glad that things had ended up working out, when it was all said and done with. He didn’t drink, smoke or even trash hotel rooms and he had been with the same girl since junior high. In comparison to his contemporaries and band mates he was downright tame so the angry protestors had no other choice but to move onto an easier target.

“What’s so funny?” Willow asked her, giving her a puzzled smile.

“Just thinking about your husband.” Buffy said sitting down across from her.

“We’re partners Buffy, but only in the club alright. If you want a werewolf of your very own, I’m sure there are lots just hanging around here waiting for you to take them home.” Willow teased easily. As the wife of a rock god, jealousy was a big no-no while trust had to be a big fat yes.

“Actually I found a nummy non-human treat of my very own," Buffy told her licking her lips for effect. "Then Angel showed up, chasing him off before I could take a taste or get his name and number." Buffy looped her arm around the back of the chair, casually scanning the crowd for a mane of ultra white hair.

“What did Angel want?” Willow asked leaning forward.

“The same thing he wanted when I dumped his ass.” Buffy said with a roll of her eyes. “It didn’t sound any better the second time around.”

“Be careful with that one Buffy, still waters run deep.” Oz warned her sagely. “He keeps weighing himself down this way and sooner or later he’s going to snap. All he’ll see is monsters which isn’t a good idea since he happens to be a demon with a badge. He could try to shut you down.”

“More than a hundred demon hate groups have tried the same thing. I run a clean club and my books are a pristine as angels butt crack, thanks to your darling wife here. So if Detective Liam Angelus wants to take his shot he’s more than welcome to try. It’s America after all, the home of the trumped up charges and hefty lawsuits against the city for harassment. The ACLU would have a field day and the club would get a little free press.” Buffy said simply. Her club was her life, her center and she was used to fighting for it.

She didn’t think for a moment that Angel would go that far but she trusted Oz’s judgment. He didn’t talk much but he listened and observed. When he did talk it was usually worth listening to. He had some pretty profound thoughts swirling through that head of his and he had a unique way of looking at things. He was a creative free spirit and since Willow was analytical and practical they had always stuck her as the perfect couple. Oz taught her to open herself up and relax and she showed him how to be a little more responsible.

Besides they were such a cute couple it was almost sickening, Buffy thought with a grin as Oz stroked his hand over Willow‘s long hair. They had been married since Willow turned eighteen and they still looked like a pair of high schoolers knee deep in puppy love. She didn't see herself as the white picket fence type or even the modern ultra hip equivalent that these two had, but she was still envious. What it be like to have that kind of connection with another person, she wondered getting to her feet.That thought had come out of nowhere but it was easy to ignore since it wasn't something she wanted to really explore. She gave them the type of smile a child gives their parents when they catch them getting all cuddly. “I almost hate to break this up but we have work waiting for us in the office. Spreadsheets, expense accounts and salaries oh my.”

_____________________________________________


Spike, never being the patient type, fidgeted uncomfortably while he waited for her to come back downstairs. When he had first arrived, he had gone through the club and he knew that he wouldn’t exactly be able to blend in on the second floor. With the pale color scheme he would stick out like black stain in white satin sheets.

He had to give Buffy credit though, she had built one hell of a club. In reality it was like two clubs in one, the pleasant version of hell on earth, here on the ground floor or you could go upstairs to heaven, complete with fruity mocktails.

He was a creature of the dark, by design and nature and he liked it that way. But he couldn’t help wondering which way the red hot Buffy Giles swung. Was she a creature of darkness, like himself or the light of all lights. Disturbed by the way his thoughts were going, he took a few moments to remind himself that had some serious money resting on this case. Tthat was exactly what he should keep his eye on…the money he told himself firmly.

He had nearly convinced his hormones to obey, but then she appeared on the top of the stairs like Aphrodite herself, descending from Mt. Olympus in all of her glory. Her skin was effulgent in the soft wash of light surrounding her like a gossamer cloud. Due to the floor plan the light never quite reached him down in the pit but he felt as if he was seeing his first sunrise in centuries. As the warmth of her beauty spilled over him, i t was even more exquisite then he had ever remembered.

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his cell phone. He pressed autodial and waited for his partner to come on the line. “Charles, call Summers and tell him to find someone else.”

“Too dangerous?”

“Yeah, something like that.” He said, watching the lines of her body as she made her way down the stairs. Only a fool would chose something as cold and crisp as money over those softly curving lines of womanhood. “Gotta go mate, something I have to do.”

Without waiting for an answer he clicked off the phone and jammed it into his pocket. In the back of his mind he knew Gunn was going to kill him over this, but the rest of his mind was to focused on getting over to her to care. He could smell her, the sweet scent of her skin on the air as if she was the only person in the building. Like the predator his beast within truly was, he pursued her with a single-mindedness that a pure human’s brain would never be unable to understand.

Standing in front of her only moments later, he meant to ask her if they could talk, but his lips had something else in mind. Before he had consciously even realized what he was doing, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. His tongue trailed over her lips, softer than silk and he got his first taste of her.

Thoreau said, the whole body... imbibes delight through every pore and as his tongue explored her moist sultry mouth, Spike believed him unconditionally. She tasted like sin, sticky honey being licked off of warm skin in a dark room full of desperate moans. Her flavor traveled down his body, coating every cell of his being with her essence until his body would wither if he went without her for to long. Her kisses were narcotic, altering his consciousness with every moment he drank her in.

He pulled away, knowing that it was already to late. She was in his blood and he was addicted. Less than seconds since his lips had left hers, they tingled and his body was shaking from need. Since she was still in his arms, he didn’t see any harm in taking one more taste…just to take the edge of he assured himself.

Realizing his intentions, she brought her hand up to his mouth to stop him. “Why don’t you give me your name first?”

“Spike,” he said when she pulled her hand away. He was slowly recovering his senses when she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him in for another searing kiss.

Every inch of her was humming with need. Her blood was burning through her veins and she had been cold for so long she couldn’t risk letting him go so soon. He had disappeared on her once tonight and she was afraid if she lost sight of him now, he would vanish without a trace. Fisting her hands into the soft leather of his jacket, she drank in the fire from his lips willing her body to burn alive until nothing remained but ash. At that moment she couldn’t think of a better way to die, than in his arms.

His hands roamed over her flesh like hungry wolves and when something ripped into her shoulder, she moaned. She was too lost to her desire for her mind to register the searing pain or the unending screams around her. Only when he jerked, did she feel the blood sliding down her body like warm silk. Her hand reached up to feel her throbbing shoulder and when she felt the blood thick and gelatinous against her fingertips, the haze of desire evolved into pure unadulterated rage.

Spinning around, she searched for any sign of the attacker. Her eyes grazed over the innocent bystanders looking for someone who was an island of tranquility in this surging sea of chaos. The scene blurred in lines of dark colors and jostling bodies as her focus narrowed her entire world down to one demon with putrid green scales and red rat like eyes. Nothing else mattered in that moment, not the passion, not the pain, nothing but the battle she was about to begin. Her face, normally so animated and full of life faded away to reveal a grim mask of ruthless determination.

She didn’t run through the crowd, like a fish desperately trying to make it upstream, she flowed through it, like the river itself. In moments she was facing her attacker and she launched out with a stunning right cross hitting him solidly in the face. He stumbled back, his mouth a bloody red ruin of mangled flesh. “Is that all you got slayer?” He asked spitting the blood that had gathered in his mouth out onto the floor.

He had dared to attack her in her club and she was not in the mood for witty banter or sarcastic remarks, she wanted to make him pay. She turned into a spinning back kick. When he ducked under her leg like she had expected, she dropped to one knee turning the back spin into a low leg sweep. She connected with him at the right knee, shoving it out of joint and knocking him to the floor with a high pitched scream of pain. Fluidly rising to her feet, she landed another blow to his ribs smiling sadistically at the dry snap of atleast one of them breaking under her foot.

He reached into his pocket to retrieve his gun, but before he could point it, let alone take aim, another foot pressed into his elbow anchoring him to the floor. “Wouldn’t do that mate.” Spike said applying almost enough force to shatter the bone. “The lady here will just take it as an excuse to kill you and you don’t want that now do you?”

With nothing left to do, he tossed away the gun and glared up at him. “Can’t wait to tell the boys back home that I not only bloodied the daughter of a god but also the infamous William the Bloody as well.”

At his words, Buffy looked over to Spike realizing that the same bullet that had hit her, had traveled through her flesh to lodge itself in his. She could make out the shiny metal of the bullet glaringly bright against the dark red blood streaming around it.

Noticing where her gaze had traveled, he gave her an assuring wink. “Nothing but a thorn luv, don’t concern yourself.”

“From the show you two were putting on, I thought Har’tuh had hired her a prostitute instead of a body guard.” The demon spat out before leered up at her. “Either way it doesn’t look like your daddy is going to get his money‘s worth.”

Hearing enough, Spike kicked him in the face in a blinding blur of speed to fast for the human eye to follow, knocking the demon unconscious. But he knew, even before he met Buffy’s angry jade eyes, the damage had already been done.

“I can explain, pet.” Spike said taking a step towards her. He had just met her but he still felt like he had betrayed her.

“Let me guess Har’tuh paid you a small fortune to protect me from some big ugly from his past.” Buffy asked, crossing her arms over her chest, stifling a wince from the pain in her shoulder.

“Yeah,” Spike said a little surprised. “But I called my partner and quit after we danced.”

She laughed but she still wasn‘t ready to forgive him yet. But she wasn’t ready to let him go either, which sent her scouring her mind for some sort of compromise. “I’m good honey, but not that good. Call and let your partner know that your back on the job.”

“Your father may have already cancelled the contract.”

“He’s not my father, just the sperm donor. My father lives in England.” She corrected him coldly. “But Hank isn’t hiring you I am.”

She saw something flicker in his eyes. “Don’t worry, I can meet your fee.”

“That’s not what I worried about, I wondering what your hiring me for?” He walked over to stand in front of her and jerked his head at the demon. “You more or less took this bastard down without any help from me and when he told you my profession you didn’t exactly seem grateful. So what exactly do you want from me Buffy?”

Unable to resist, she flicked her gaze down the long length of his body.

“Now wait just a damn minute,” Spike said taking her arm. He wanted her so badly it hurt, but he had his pride…no matter how delightful the job sounded. “I’m not a whore. You can buy my professional services and I’ll guard your body but I’m not about to let you buy me.”

Judging by the steam all but pouring out of his ears, she figured they were even. “Get over yourself Spike. If I want a man, I don’t have to buy one. This isn’t the first time this has happened and since I am part human I could use some help. You took a bullet and didn’t run screaming so that shows me you can handle yourself. But it’s my life so we do this my way.”

She pulled her arm away and looked into his eyes. “I want you Spike but we will handle that on my terms as well. If you got a problem with that, walk away now.”

Wanting no more misunderstanding, he reached up to touch her face. “I might be bad for you luv, I’ve got a past and it isn’t pleasant. So maybe I should be saying the same thing to you.”

She thought about her own past, the blood, the pain, the demons. She had seen and done things that she knew from experience could make a man look at her like she was his worst nightmare made flesh. “Everyone has a past, mine is painted with blood and filled with screams of terror and pain. That’s also my future and my present, I might hurt you before this is over Spike.”

“Then so be it, I’m not about to walk away.” He brought his lips to hers and whispered against her mouth. “I might be the one who hurts you.”

With his lips a breath away from hers, she knew there was no going back now. She didn’t believe for a moment that she would live to see her golden years so her only choice was to live each day she did have well. Without passion, without heat you might as well be another cold body on a slab.

She couldn’t imagine a worse fate than that. No torment of hell could be worse than potential unfilled and every time her lips met his, she felt the potential for something more. Something that she wanted in the deepest crevice of her heart…to love and be loved in return.

“Then make me burn until then,” she whispered closing the distance between their lips. Dimly she heard the wail of sirens slicing through the night like the weeping call of a nightingale but nothing mattered but him. There was no end or beginning of time, just this moment.

Needing to feel her skin under his fingers, he pulled her closer, wrenching a pain filled gasp from her throat. “Bloody hell,” He muttered pulling away to study her shoulder. He had completely forgotten they had been shot and since she was the only one in danger of bleeding to death, he was surprised she hadn’t brought it up.

The skin was ragged and red, like a fire raging beneath her pale skin but to his surprise the thumb sized hole had already began to close. She was healing faster than he was and that thought alone, reminded his own brain that he too was in pain. Since he was more concerned about her it was easy to ignore it. Wanting to see how badly she was hurt, he prodded around the wound gently causing her to wince sharply. “I can’t believe you.”

“Yeah that me, natures mystery.” She muttered dryly pulling away.

“Not the healing, which is impressive by the way, but your fussing now more than when you were actually shot.”

“Well I was a little busy at the time.” She told him with a wicked smile. “I don‘t mind a little pain as foreplay, but even for me this was a little extreme.”

“Want me to kiss it and make it better, baby?” He shot back, liking the way it sounded.

“Vampires.” She said rolling her eyes. “It’s always about the blood lust and not about the lust.”

“You knew?” Spike asked, unable to believe she had surprised him yet again. Every time he thought he had her figured, she did the last thing he expected. He loved that in a woman and once you add in the rough foreplay, she was close to becoming his ideal girlfriend.

“The whole no heartbeat thing, gave it away on the dance floor. But it’s not really a problem for me, I need a man with a little more stamina than the average human. We got demons to deal with and Joe Regular doesn‘t really thrive in that environment.” She told him switching her focus away from her throbbing glands and insistent libido. Before she had time to say anything else or ask any questions she heard the sound of the front doors being thrown open.

Only one man she knew entered a room like that and she wasn’t really in the mood for another confrontation with Detective Angelus. “Follow my lead, you’re now on the clock.” She told Spike quickly, while Angel made his way over to them.

“What in the hell happened here?” He demanded, motioning for his men to assist the demon on the ground.

“Self defense, he shot me, I kicked his ass. Case closed.” Buffy told him harshly. His tone implied that this was some how her fault and that more or less told her how the rest of the conversation was going to go…badly.

“You don’t look badly injured while he is unconscious. That doesn’t say self defense to me.” He told her crossly, glaring at the man just over her shoulder. He could see she was bleeding but more importantly he recognized the man as the one she had been dancing with earlier. That just put him in a bad mood, even though they weren‘t together anymore he didn‘t care to have his nose rubbed in it.

“I’m the slayer in this conversation, Detective” Buffy said, leveling him with a icy glare. “So that means what you think doesn’t mean shit. I outrank you, so I don’t need your permission to deal with a violent assailant. He shot me in a crowded club full of innocent bystanders and if it had been a few inches lower I wouldn’t be standing here talking to you. So what in the hell did you expect me to do Angel, ask him to wait nicely until your team could get here to arrest him?”

“You may be a slayer, but what about your friend here?” Angel asked, making sure that by friend he meant lover. “Did have a part in this?”

“He’s my body guard Angel and he was shot…so yeah he had a part in this. He knocked him out and disarmed him but the rest was just little old me. If he hadn‘t, you’d have a body on your hands, so you might say thank you.” Buffy said mockingly.

“Would you have really killed him?” Angel asked her quietly.

She met his eyes, letting him see the darkness she was capable of in matters of life and death. “You know the answer Angel. I don’t go down easy, I fight.”

“There has to be more to life than kill or be killed, or else what in the hell’s the point.” He asked, running a hand through his hair.

“Living Angel, that’s the point.” Buffy said laying a hand over the wound. The blood had dried so she slipped her finger into the wound to gather blood on her finger tip. She rubbed her finger over her palm to smear the blood over her hand before lifting it up to show it to him. “You don’t drink blood because it’s the color of fresh roses, you drink it because there’s life stored away in every single drop. This is my life, one drop at a time and I’m not ready for it to be over yet. That’s worth fighting for, I’m worth fighting for and I sure as hell don’t have to stand here and defend myself to you.”

“Why are you afraid you new friend here might suddenly see you the way I do?” Angel shot back, his mouth watering at the sight of blood warm and fresh on her hand.

Oz’s words floated back to her and she realized that he had been right. “I may be just another monster to you Angel but your nothing to me. Poor tortured Angel, can’t be a monster, can’t be a man. You are pathetic and the real reason your so pissed off is because I figured that out a long time ago. Your beneath me…”

He cut her off with a sharp backhand, knocking her a full step back. Every eye in the place turned to the sound as it echoed through the nearly empty building and up to the rafters above.

Which Spike took as his cue to step forward. Not as her body guard but as the man currently in her life. If she had a problem with that, then….they would talk about it later he decided. He stepped forward and hit Angel with a solid right cross wearing a sadistic smile the entire time. “Hit a nerve did she?”

Buffy laid a hand on Spike’s forearm, stopping him from taking another shot. She dabbed at the blood gathering in the corner of her lip. “It looks like I’m not the only one who is a monster.”

Realizing what he had done, Angel’s eyes filled with remorse. “Buffy…I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, just get the fuck out. Your not welcome here anymore.” She turned around and left him standing there and she never looked back. Angel was her past, a past she didn’t care to repeat, while Spike…well she wasn’t sure what he was yet.

Both vampires eyed each other while the click click of her stiletto’s on the floor got father and father away. Spike’s first instinct was to go after her but he reckoned she needed a little time to get her mind together. It was obvious these two had been involved but since it was also obvious that it was very much over, he wasn’t threatened by this git in the least, he told himself.

They stood there watching each other in silence both fully aware that everyone in the room was waiting to see what would happen next. Figuring he had done enough damage for the night, Angel turned on his heel and left without another word. He had a lot to think about.


______________________________________________

“Buffy are you alright?” Willow asked running into her office only seconds after Buffy had pulled the door shut.

“My arm aches but it’s nothing my favorite Wicca can‘t help.” Buffy hinted, walking the rest of the way over to her chair.

“I’m not talking about that, I talking about what that bastard Angel did.” Willow said, her voice laced with hatred and disgust. She walked over to Buffy and laid her hands gently over the wound. Reciting the incantation in her head she could feel a ball of warmth flow into her hands. She visualized pushing that power into Buffy. When she pulled her hand away the wound wasn’t completely healed, but it was closed and some of the inflammation had faded.

“I am so over him Willow.” Buffy said rolling her arm gently. It still throbbed but it was barely even a one on her pain scale. Sometimes it was good to have a witch as a best friend and this was just one of those times, Buffy thought with a grin. But there were things she wanted to do tonight, most of them involving Spike, and she wanted to get started before she talked herself out of it. “Call the cleaning crew and have them handle the main floor first thing in the morning. Then talk to Xander and have him make sure the staff understands that this is an in house matter and that anyone caught talking it over with the patrons will be fired. I’ll handle the press but I will need you to run things around here for a little while after that.”

“So this wasn’t just a one time thing huh?” Willow asked, leaning back against the desk. She knew things like this happened a lot in Buffy‘s life but this was the first time it had happened in the club. Buffy loved this place and Willow understood why that was her first priority but she still wanted to what this would mean for her friend.

“Nope, just another unwelcome gift from Hank.” Catching the look of concern in her eyes, Buffy gave her a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry I’m not solo gal, he also hired me a bodyguard.”

“So that’s what Blondie was doing with you at the base of the stairs…guarding your body.” Willow asked innocently. She had been two steps behind her when they had started their impromptu make out session. And even though she had been standing there in a public place, she had felt like she had walked in on them without knocking first. It was like they had secreted unrestrained desire into the air, which is why she left them to it and went back upstairs to get a kiss or three from her own husband. Blushing at the thought of how hot she had gotten watching them, Willow pushed those feelings aside.

She hadn’t been fast enough, Buffy saw the faint blush creeping down her friends neck. “Trust me Will, it was even better than you can possibly imagine. I was there and I’ve never been so turned on in my entire life. It was like the rest of the world was gone and all that mattered was feeling his lips against mind. Which is why I decided to hire him.”

When Willow gaped at her in shock, she quickly explained what had been going on. When she had the gist of it, Buffy leaned back in her chair. “So since I want to keep him around for awhile, I figured I might as well hire him to help me deal whatever mess Hank’s gotten me into this time.”

Since Buffy had only been enjoying brief affairs since her break from Angel, Willow was overjoyed that her friend was finally interested in someone for more than a one night stand. She knew what infatuation looked like on her friend and this wasn’t it. This was something deeper and since she had seen him punch Angel, she liked this new guy already. Now all she had to do was make sure Buffy didn‘t ruin it before it got started. “Take as long as you need, we can handle things here.”

Buffy walked back into the club. The house lights had been turned up and the place glowed with light like a burning white star banishing all the shadows the club was famous for. She could clearly see her blood, nearly black against the floor as well as the blood she had spilt and her rage swarmed through her like a thousand stinging wasps. It was like her body had been violated and it wasn't because the bullet had ripped into her flesh. Her essence was contained in every single thing in this building. Every brick and every plank of wood had drunk her in like a sponge and despite what Angel thought, it had been a place of innocence. She had never been innocent, but until tonight this place had been.

The River Styx was a refuge for those created out of darkness and for those wanting to get their first taste of it. It was a place where you didn’t have to hide away from a world that proclaimed you equal with one hand and slapped at you with the other for being a freak. Everyone was welcome and no one ever left feeling disappointed. The drinks were cold and the action was always hot. You could watch the bodies writhing and grinding on the dance floor or you could step out of the shadows and join them.

Inside the heavy wooden doors was a world entirely different from the world outside and it had been a world of peace. There had been minor skirmishes through the years, a shove here and angry word there but what had happened to night was just the opening salvo to the full out war that was brewing on some distant horizon.

Her father had taken back his name, she was Buffy Giles not Buffy Summers, but his past was always a part of her future. And just like her own past, it was bloody. “Thanks Hank,” She muttered tearing her eyes away from the blood that had desecrated her last refuge of normalcy.

She saw Spike, leaning next to the bar chattering on his cell, impatient with whoever was on the other end and she couldn’t help but smile. Meeting Spike had been about the only thing that had kept this night from being a complete and utter waste. Angel, she had discovered wasn’t fond of anything not being on his terms so he would be back for another game of make Buffy realize what a fool she was. The unknown demon who had sent her attacker would be back, because bad guys have one track minds of doom and destruction. But Spike…she watched the play of his muscles beneath his duster for a moment as he gestured impatiently. Well something told her he was anything but a waste of time.

“Damn it Gunn, I told you the girl is picking up the tab. She ain’t keen on letting Har’tuh help her out but we’re still getting paid. It‘s my hide in the line of fire so what in the hell makes you think you have the right to ride me over this?” Spike asked him angrily absently rubbing his fingers over the bullet still embedded in his flesh..

“I’m your business partner, the door doesn’t just say Gunn and Spike Investigations because it sounds pretty. Har’tuh was seriously pissed when I called him and when the news broke about what went down he called and ate my ass about taking his money only to drop the deal seconds before we would have actually earned it. He wants to sue our ass, some shit about endangering his daughter by leaving the case before he could find a replacement.” Gunn shot back his own anger at the boiling point.

“The girl took out the demon herself, with only a minor assist from me. You’re the lawyer Charlie, so use that and the fact she hired me to prove we’re not negligent or whatever horseshit Har’tuh tries to lay at our door. Then when that’s over with, transmit the files to my cell so I can do the damn job.”

“Listen I’m the brains of this company and something tells me your brains not on the beasties but the beauty. I’ve seen her pic, she’s a fine looking woman but that doesn‘t change the facts. Her daddy happens to be an overprotective Fallen One with enough clout and power to bury us if you fuck this up by fucking her!”

“Gunn, it’s nothing but business.” He lied easily aware that she had walked up to stand beside him. He held up his hand to let her know it would be a moment or two longer.

Without a word she took the cell phone and clicked it off. When he glared at her, she gave him a slow smile. “I’m not in the mood to talk and I don’t like to be kept waiting.”

Since all of the blood in his body headed south of his waist band, he found it remarkably hard to be pissed off about his interrupted conversation with Gunn. “Why didn’t you just say so pet?”

She grabbed the front of his jacket and jerked him closer to her. “I just did. So are you coming or not?”

“I’m not your plaything luv.” He told her, fascinated by the curve of her lip. “We might be doing things your way but that doesn’t mean you have me on a leash.”

She thought about all the things she wanted to do to his tight, toned body and then gave him a look hot enough that it could melt steel. “I don‘t let any man tie me down but if it makes you feel better you can tie me up. We‘re both our own masters Spike, but tonight I‘m not looking to play peasant to your prince.”

“You might change your mind about that, luv.” He said while all of his nerve endings sizzled and snapped at her words.

“Well see who begs first.” She warned him before stealing a brief kiss. She traced her hands down the lines of his chest. “Once I have you naked beneath me, I’m going to lick my down each and everyone of these lines. When I finally make my way down to your cock it’s going to think it’s been crowned king after I’ve worshiped it with my mouth.”

CRACK…shhhuuruur...fiszzezsz, they both turned back to look at the bar as the sound reminded them they weren’t exactly alone. Sheepishly Xander looked down at the broken bottle that he had accidentally shattered in his hands at her words. Unable to meet her eyes he watched the pale amber wine spilling down to the floor, before mumbling his apology. “Sorry boss.”

Hearing the desire in Xander’s voice, she couldn’t help but send Spike a triumphant look. “That was just a preview, so you wanna get out of here and catch the real thing?”

Instead of answering, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his keys. “Your place or my hotel room?”

She headed to the door and called back over her shoulder. “My place, I don’t have any neighbors to worry about.”

***The bike Buffy drives is BMW K 1200 S, I chose it because it has a futuristic look suitable for 1000 years ahead of now and you gotta love a bike that goes from 0-60 mph in 2.8 seconds right? Ohh, Hyper storage by the way is a small space that thanks to the technological advances of the time shrinks down objects so they fit in an impossibly small space.***


Spike followed Buffy out to the employee parking lot in back of the building. They had taken two steps towards his car, a 3057 Desoto Firedome designed to look like one two centuries older, complete with the original rocker panels, when she turned to him expectantly. “I forgot my coat, can I borrow yours?”

Now normally the ladies, asked about his ride which had cost him a lot of coin but for some reason she didn’t seem the slightest bit impressed, which took him off kilter. “You want my coat?”

“Yeah, it’s almost an hour ride from here and in this,” she gestured at her clothes. “I’ll be the block of ice formally known as Buffy.”

“Honey it’s sunny California, meaning it’s close to a balmy 75 degrees right now. I’m partial to this coat and this ain’t high school.” He shot back, casually walking the rest of the way to his car, just to let her know it was his. “I could give you a ride if you like, if your cars climate control is stuck on ice age.”

“And leave my baby here all alone all night, I’d meet you in hell for a disco first.” She told him walking over to her bike. She stroked her hand across the butter soft leather seat and turned back just in time to see his jaw drop. Her bike was a 3100 S, in devil may care red and even if you didn’t know jack about bikes it just looked well…cool, she thought with a wicked grin.

“You sure that not too powerful for a little thing like yourself?” Spike asked, forcing his tongue to roll back into his mouth. Gunn had the poor man’s version of that bike and even the replica was a beast right out of hell.

“You want a ride?” She asked sliding onto the seat like it was a long lost lover. “You could wrap your arms around me and keep your coat.”

“Hell take the coat, just let me drive.” He said abandoning his car without a second glance.

“Nope, no one drives but me, but I promise a hell of a ride.” She said reaching back to where the hyper storage cube was built in on the back. Flipping the switch she pulled out her helmet and the spare.

“Helmet laws suck,” He muttered, pulling it on anyway.

“Yeah well I like my brains inside my skull and the way people drive these days you can’t be to careful.” She warned, twisting her hair and sliding on her helmet. She patted the seat behind her and waited for him to climb on.

He did and when her ass was nestled against his rigid cock, she knew that it was for the bike. But since she got wet just looking at it, she couldn’t blame him. Motorcyle foreplay at it’s finest…she thought with a grin. She started the engine and instead of a throaty roar, it started light and mean and she felt his arms wrap around her tightly.

He barely had time to gasp when she pealed out of the lot like all of the demons of hell were on there heals. It was like he had blinked and they were suddenly tearing down the road at a breakneck speed, with a casual disregard for anything even resembling a traffic law. As they sped through the city streets nipping through traffic fluidly, he had to envy her skill. She rode the bike like an experienced streetwalker turning tricks nightly to survive and he wasn’t sure if he should shut his eyes and pray they survived or urge her to go faster.

An hour later and several near fatal misses later, she pulled up to an two story mansion a short walk away from the turbulent ocean. True to her word there wasn’t another house in sight and for all intents and purposes they seemed to have left the real world behind. Which is why she chose it, he assumed climbing off the bike to get a better look around. He pulled off the helmet and handed it to her. “Nice pile of bricks, pet.”

“Yeah well Hank gave more than enough money for this lifetime, so I figured why not have the best.” She said as she returned the helmets to hyper storage.

“Let me get this straight pet, you take his money but you won’t let him pay for my services?”

“Everyone likes having money Spike, even me.” She admitted combing her fingers through her hair. “He gave me a large trust fund and as far as I am concerned, I have earned every penny. His past constantly creeps up trying to take a bite out of my ass, so I think of it‘s a hazard pay. But like you I can’t be bought. I decide where the money goes and every time he sends some big expensive bribe my way, it gets sent back. See that’s what you are Spike a bribe.”

“How you figure that?”

“After he handed me over to my parents he walked away whistling and never looked back. I’ve never met him face to face…well not that I can remember, but I see his enemies once or sometimes twice a year. When that happens he sends some big please-forgive-me present my way. Sometimes it’s a pretty sparkle, sometime shuttle tickets home to visit my folks or in the really bad cases it’s a bodyguard.”

She looked out to the ocean for a moment, watching the moonlight being carried to shore by the cascading waves. Like always the sight calmed her. “He gave up the right to make those kind of decisions for me. So by hiring you myself, it makes it my choice. He doesn’t get a say in how I live my life and that’s the way it’s going to stay.”

He could hear the pain in her voice, the bittersweet longing for all that she had lost or never known about her real family. It was endearing, this fragility in someone who exuded strength and confidence the way other women had to settle for surrounded themselves in cheap perfume to make them feel powerful. “He doesn’t know what he lost pet.”

“Sure he does Spike,” she said turning back to him. “But the real question is does he care?”

Instead of answering a question that he didn’t know the answer to, he kissed her. He drank away the cold melancholy that had settled into her bones and replaced it with the molten fire of lust. Her hands roamed over his body, tightening his muscles under the skin with each desperate and hungry caress. “Inside…let’s go inside..” He told her, pulling his mouth away.

“Later,” She said reaching back to untie the stings at the base of her neck. She let the dark fabric slide down her body like water, watching the lust leap into his eyes at the sight of her exposed breasts. Putting her hands on the back of the bike seat she turned to look at him over her shoulder. “I want it here…now.”

Since he didn’t think he would make it inside, he didn’t see a problem with her scenario. He walked over to her and trailed his hand down her spine causing her to arch her back and press her trim ass against his throbbing cock. “How do you want it then luv, soft and slow?” He paused long enough to lick his way up her back. “Or hard and fast?”

“Fuck me fast, we’ll go slow later.” She promised them both. Reaching down, she unfastened her pants and slid them down her legs to pool at her feet.

If she had been wearing underwear, he never saw it but he did she her ass pale and juicy in the moonlight. Freeing his cock, he spooned her. He could feel her, moist and dripping against the tip of his member and he didn’t waste time with anymore foreplay. They had been dancing around each other all night and now it was time to take it over the top and send them both spiraling over the edge.

He rammed the full length of him into her, in single brutal thrust drawing a deep moan from her throat. He could feel her body adjusting to him, stretching to make room. “So tight,” He murmured hungrily, pulling out of her only to thrust back in before she could draw a single breath.

He reached his hands across her body, cupping her breasts in his hands absently marveling at the size. They filled his hands to overflowing and since they were as soft as spun cotton, he knew they hadn’t been bought. Nature had blessed her and he considered that a gift to all man-kind. He rolled her nipples around his fingers, pinching them, teasing them to tautness, delighting them both.

“More…Spike…give me more.” She gasped out, grinding against him with each thrust. Inside she was screaming inside for him, every fiber of her being was his for the taking and she would deny him nothing. She wanted to drown in him, be consumed utterly by the sensations he was kindling through her. But more than that she wanted to take him under with her. She reached up a hand to sweep her hair away, leaving the right side of her neck open and exposed. “Bite me…drink me in with your mouth.”

He could feel the climax building inside him with each jagged thrust and he could feel her body fighting for its own release. Slipping into his true face, he lowered his face down to her neck, greedily licking across the skin he was about to claim. Only one thought was understandable in his mind…mine…she is mine. Opening his mouth, he claimed her with his fangs. Blood welled to the surface filling him with the taste of her and dribbled down his chin to trail down her back like a crimson sacrifice for the passion bending them both to its will.

Screaming out his name into the night, the double penetration shot her over the edge, drowning her mind and body with a release the likes of which she had never experienced. Her whole body was a single burning nerve expanding and collapsing around him like her soul itself was struggling to burst free and fill the emptiness in his body.

As if he felt it, he found his own release and jerked his mouth away to scream his own pleasure into the night. It roared up to the heavens and made the stars themselves tremble in the sky as they reveled in the cry of desire truly sated.

***Hey this fic is up for “Best Spuffy Fic” which is a total honor…one which I am not entirely sure I deserve since I’ve only been at this for a little while, so I voted for PattyAnne. But since I am a big fan of letting authors know their stuff is appreciated, I encourage all of you to go to your account, go to weekly polls and vote for your favorites!! But to all of the people who have reviewed or emailed me about this story, your praise and opinions are what keep me going and I couldn’t ask for better readers!! So this chapter is for you!”***


Spike felt the salty breeze sweep over his skin and hoped it would return his sanity…it didn’t. If anything it made him a little more insane for the beautiful vixen pressed against him. He could taste her on the wind and even thought he had just consumed her fully, he wanted more. A sly smile slid across his lips, he wanted more alright but this time he would be in control.

In nearly two centuries of lovemaking he had never felt the kind of power they had created between them and it had been enough to bring Atlas to his knees. He was half in love with her before this and now he was completely lost…there would be no one else, for either of them.

She was his, even if she didn’t know it and it was time to make his claim permanent. He knew he shouldn’t be thinking of forever with a woman he had just met but with her it was like her heartbeat had filled his empty breast and brought him back to life. Dead was he no more, she had fucked the life back into him and he should just walk away before he lost everything. It was impossible to fall in love this fast, this quickly…it was just lust…infatuation and nothing more…nothing real.

Screw that, he thought bending down to pull up his trousers. He had fought for a lot of stupid reasons over the years, picked fights he had no hope of winning but not once had he ever ran away because it was it was impossible. Love wasn’t something you could custom order or put on the calendar and wait for, he told himself. It was too strong to be denied forever and yet so fragile that it could be lost in the single moment you looked away. That all love was, moments in time, single grains of sand on the coastline of your reality and he wasn’t about to let this or her slip through his fingers. He was tired of being alone in the tumultuous sea that was lost in the constantly crashing waves and fast currents.

Something told him, that his woman was the type to swim against the current, just on principal and he wasn’t about to let that happen. If she wanted to fight, they would fight until they were both aching and bloody but in the end he would burn in hell before he let her go. It was about time, she started to understand that and who she was dealing with. She had said they were both masters but so far all they had done is dance to her tune. Now it was time for him to lead. He bent down and scooped her into his arms. “My turn luv.”

Admiring his stamina almost as much as his diamond cut abs, she gave him a wicked smile. He paused at the door and she raised her voice for the voice lock. “What do you have in mind?”

The door swung open and he surveyed his surroundings. She had a spacious living room and to his surprise it was decorated in the same dark hues as the main floor in the club, a shrine of gothic elegance. Two long black velvet divans faced off against each other from opposite sides of the room separated by a deep thick rug the color of spilled wine. The far end of the room was dominated by a large work of art surrounded by candles. The sight of that particular portrait, froze him in his tracks.

It was a woman sitting on the grass with her arms wrapped around her legs, hiding her naked form and giving her an air of undeniable innocence. Behind her a full moon rode high in the sky while her golden hair spilled around her shoulders like sunshine in defiance of the encroaching night. On her back were a large pair of wings, broken and bloody with silver feathers forever frozen as they fell to the floor. He knew every line of this painting but as his eyes took in the woman’s tear streaked face he saw it clearly for the first time.

“I know it looks like me but I wasn‘t the girl who posed for it.” Buffy explained, noticing how entranced he seemed to be by the portrait. “I met the artist at the showing and she gave it to me but she wouldn‘t tell me the story behind it. She said someday a dark soul would tell me the story of my creation and that our love would either damn me for all eternity or restore my wings.”

Gently he laid her down on the rug settling himself behind her so that her head was cradled in his lap. He brushed his hand down her face, the face exactly like the crying angel in the picture. “Once upon a time, an angel was expelled from heaven and brought into a world she was never meant to exist in. The forces of evil had began to lay claim on this world and the Powers that Be knew she was the only one who was strong enough to protect the innocent. She was their gift to the world, a Champion given at a time when there were very few willing to fight. But there is a balance that must be met and by sending her into this world, it shifted the scales. The First evil demanded the order be restored. Having no choice they allowed a curse to be laid upon the Chosen One.”

“What was the curse?” Buffy asked, softly.

“The woman who painted this, listens to voices that only she can hear and sees things in her mind of things yet to come because she lives in the world between worlds. But not even she knows how the story ends, the whispers would not tell her.”

“How do you know all this?”

“The artist, Drusilla is my sister.” He bent down to lay a soft kiss on her forehead. “She showed me this painting and told me that you and I had loved each other throughout time, only to lose each other again with each new life and death. But our souls are joined, calling us to each other and the only way to be truly whole is to be together. She said you were my destiny and that even though my soul was taken so long ago, it was never lost because to you it will always return.”

Buffy wanted to pretend nothing he said made any sense but she couldn’t, not after what she had felt outside. But believing something and admitting it were entirely different matters, she decided. It was one thing to believe that her soul mate was a vampire and another to believe that she was some mystical Chosen One destined to fight the forces of evil. She was the one who controlled her destiny and she was going to keep right on making her own way.

Right now she was choosing to be with Spike for the foreseeable future atleast…not because of some story she assured herself but because she wanted him. He was attractive, witty and sexy as hell so who wouldn’t want to try him on for size for a while.

He could practically see the wheels turning in her head and he knew she wasn’t ready to believe. Hell he hadn’t believed it when Dru had told it to him nearly twenty five years ago when she had painted it…wait a second he thought, mentally putting together a timeline. “How old are you by the way pet?”

“Isn’t it a little late to be asking if I’m legal?” She teased getting up and turning to face him deliberately putting her back to the painting. “Fear not lover, I’ll be twenty six next March.”

Chuckling to himself, he smiled at her, needing no more assurance that she was in fact his. It would take her a while to wrap her stubborn mind around it but it wasn’t like he was getting any older. “Good to know pet but you wanna break a few laws anyway?”

“What did you have in mind?” She asked.

“Lay back luv, just put yourself in my hands.”

She did as he asked and he just took a few moments to enjoy the sight of her, cream against the deep red of the rug that wrapped around her curves like melting wax. He slid down his pants, so that they were both naked. He wanted her to see just how strongly she affected him before he showed her just how strong his control really was. Tracing his hands up her thighs, barely brushing her skin he slid his way up her body. Lowering his head, he took his first taste of her.

As his tongue stroked along her skin, she writhed beneath him arching her hips to give him better access. Like cat liking the last traces of cream from a bowl, he forced himself to go slow. He wanted her to beg, even if it meant driving himself insane with need. Using the rough underside of his tongue, he circled around her clit never touching it.

He looked down her body and up at her face, willing her with his eyes to ask for what she wanted. He watched her roll her nipple between her forefinger and thumb, pleasing herself but he knew it wouldn’t be enough to get her off. For that she needed him and all she had to do was say the words.

He trailed his tongue down her slit, gathering up the sweet drops slipping down her flesh like dew on the petals of a rosebud. Like a bee gathering nectar he hummed, low and deep in his throat.

“So close….uhh...fuuucck.” She cried out writhing beneath him. “Please…more…uhnn.”

Doing as she asked, he flicked the end of his tongue across her clit, before drawing the nub inside his mouth. Suckling her gently, he thought he had never tasted anything as sweet as the sticky juices of her passion. He slid his fingers inside her, motioning for her to come…and she did as if on command. He felt her muscles clench around him, sucking him in and pushing him away at the same time. “Your such a tight little thing.”

“Another…benefit of super powers..” She gasped out, riding the last waves of her climax.

That made him blink. “You mean….”

“Yep…you could fuck me senseless and tomorrow night or the night after it’s like I’m being touched for the very first time. It‘s just like pulling a muscle and given enough time in between I heal.”

Perpetually chaste, that was a new one even for him and if he hadn’t loved her before this, that alone would have been enough to push him over the edge. It made sense when he thought about it, losing her virginity was just another injury and he had already seen first hand how quickly she healed. But all that mattered to him was that no matter how many men she had in her past, tonight her body believed he was her first and only. That suited him just fine, but he didn‘t like the idea of her being able to forget him. He had planned on another bout of rough and tumble but he now had something else in mind.

He moved up her body, to nuzzle her breasts. He could hear her heart echoing beneath his ear and he could feel it resonating inside his own chest as if it was beating for them both. Overcome with tenderness, he slid into her gently, drawing a silky soft moan of pleasure from her lips. Like an intricate ballet, they dipped and swayed against one another with a delicate grace of yielding muscles while the symphony of their soft cries and moans played in the background.

Their first time had been wild, nearly an inhuman need to mate, to feel, this was about discovering one another. With every feather light caress he learned not only where she liked to be touched but also helped her to uncover a few more secret places on her body. He could feel her trying to hold back, lose herself behind the walls around her heart but she couldn’t. This wasn’t about sex, the battering heat and need, sex could be a meaningless act between strangers. This was about reverent passion, something that would matter when the night faded.

He had no idea how long they had been lost in each other but when they cried out their release only moments apart, he could see in her eyes that all the walls she had built over the years had come tumbling down. She was naked and exposed beneath him in every way. Nothing was keeping them apart but their skin.

He was just as exposed but while he found it liberating he could see it scared her down to her bones. His angel, had been hurt before and now he could finally see the scars marring her heart clearly. When the first tear trembled down from her lashes, he knew he was the first person to make love to her that way. Gathering the tear with his thumb, he looked into her eyes. Earlier he had offered her his body, now he would offer his heart. “I love you…”

“You don’t love me Spike, you love the idea star-crossed lovers chasing each other through time.” She pulled away from him, unconsciously mimicking the pose in the portrait behind her. “I’m a realist, I don’t look at the world through love colored glasses or lead with my heart. I do what it takes to survive and the last guy who claimed to love me, thought I was too bloodthirsty for his taste. He was a vampire for god’s sake and I disgusted him.”

She brushed back her hair so he could see her eyes, the darkness swimming just below the surface of the pale green of her iris. “I do what it takes to survive, break bones before mine are broken, I never hesitate…I just go for the kill. You saw me tonight and that was just a fleeting glimpse of the things I am capable of doing.”

“You know what I saw tonight Buffy? I saw a woman who wasn’t afraid of anything. But I say three words to you and you tremble.”

“It wasn’t the words that scared me Spike, it was the intent behind them. We can be together but your damn well going to understand that I am me and not some Chosen One. I’m just a woman, a daughter of a hell god sure but still just a woman. A quirk of evolution, a cosmic mistake whatever you want to call it, but at my core I am just a woman who lives in the real world.”

“I know who you are Buffy, maybe even better than you do.”

“Yeah…well what’s my favorite color?” Buffy shot back. When he didn’t answer right away, she shot out several more questions in rapid fire succession. “Favorite food, favorite song, book movie…favorite anything? How about which way I sleep or the name of my perfume?”

“Bottled Sin?” He guessed not seeing her point.

“See, you don’t know me. Those are the types of things people in love know and thousands of other tiny details.”

“I bet your ex knew all those little things but funny…he’s not the one here with you now.”

“Get out.”

“What?”

She picked up his pants and threw them at him. “You heard me, get out.”

“The hell I will.” He shouted back at her. “Those things that you talked about are the things I want to learn by being with you. But I bloody well can’t do that, if you toss me out on my arse every time I come close to seeing the real you. I’m not asking you to marry me or even to say the words back to me.”

“So what are you asking for?”

“Time Buffy…” He scooted over to look into her eyes. “All I am asking for is time for us to get to know one another. I love you so all I want is to give you a chance to find out if you love me back.”

It wasn’t so much really, she thought searching his eyes for any sign of deception and finding nothing but brutal honesty. He couldn’t make her love him…but if she was honest with herself she would admit that wasn’t what she was afraid would happen. She was afraid that she would love him. Hell, she already felt more for him than she had ever felt with Angel and that was dangerous. Angel couldn’t make her change, because she didn’t love him enough but Spike was different. Every time she looked into his icy blue eyes, she fell a little deeper. Before she knew it she would be drowning in him and she didn’t know if she was ready for that.

What she did know, was that she still wasn’t ready to lose him either. “Okay Spike, I’m your girl but this is your one chance so don’t blow it.”

He felt all the tension drain out of his shoulders at her announcement. “Don’t worry luv…I won’t.” He kissed her softly and laid her back down on the rug.

__________________________

Spike woke her up early the next morning, not with gentle caresses that she had been expecting on their first day as a couple but with a panicked scream. Jolting awake, she surveyed the room searching for the threat and had to laugh at the what she saw. Spike, deliciously naked cowering in fear behind the sofa from the soft light streaming in through the windows bathing them in a warm morning glow. “It’s okay Spike…it’s necroglass.”

Not sure if he trusted her, he tentatively reached a hand into the offending rays. When nothing happened, he looked back at her. “Next time give a fellow a bit of warning before hand luv.”

“Sorry, we were kinda busy and I forgot.” She said innocently admiring the lines of his naked ass. “Besides it’s the law isn’t it?”

“Sure for businesses and such but the cops are a sight too busy to check every house just to make sure they are up to code. But if you wanna make it up to me…” He lunged for her before she could guess his intentions. Tackling her to the floor he started kissing his way down her neck, brushing his tongue over her nearly healed bite mark.

She let him go on for a moment before fisting her hands in his hair and jerking him up to face her. “Sorry but you just went back on the clock.”

He wiggled against her suggestively. “Don’t worry pet, nothing can get to you without going through me first. I‘m protecting you with every inch of my body.”

Amused she pressed a light kiss against his lips and writhed enough to make him groan. “Sorry lover but we still have to find out whose behind last nights attack. That means using the other part of your anatomy.”

“If you wanted me to use my mouth all you had to do is ask.” He said trying to slide down her body.

Since she wasn’t sure how much longer she could resist, she did the only thing she could. She shoved him off of her, catching him off guard. Nimbly escaping his hands when the reached for her, she gave him a stern look like he was an errant child. “I have a lot to do today, press wise concerning the attack last night and I don’t have time to play right now. If you’re a good boy we can pick this up later but until then I suggest you call Har’tuh and find out what he knows.”

“Oh shit…” Spike mumbled suddenly recalling where his leather duster and his cell phone were. Charles was going to be right pissed when he called him back, he thought shaking his head. “Pet, would you mind running outside to pick up our things, seeing as the sun’s out an all. I asked my partner to transmit your file to my cell and we can start there.”

“I’ll get the stuff but your flying solo. I, being your employer am going to take a shower leaving all the grunt work to you.”

He watched her dart outside as naked as a jaybird and he had to admire the way the muscles of her thighs moved just under her trim little rear. She strolled back inside and tossed his coat to him. “There’s blood in the freezer but you can help yourself to anything in the house.”

“That being the case, why don’t I take a shower with you.” When she glared at him, he gave her a sincere smile. “Now pet, I’m just thinking about your hydro usage. Water’s a mite expensive these days but more than that we should all do our part to conserve what’s left of our natural resources.”

“I wonder if they ever thought a few thousand years ago that fresh blood would be easier to get than fresh water?” Buffy asked finally giving in. “You might as well join me since your eco-friendly and all. I mean every citizen, even the undead ones should do their part right?”

_______________________________________

After a very long and soapy encounter with a very eager woman who handled a good deal of the ‘grunt work’ Spike slipped a packet of blood into the ionwave. According to the brand, it was the good stuff straight out of Bloodworks. Vampires, not exactly expecting to be embraced with open arms when they first came out, waited until they had a alternative food source before declaring their existence. Sure they may have sired some of the brightest minds in the world to produce the Synblood but since they had a longer lifetime and the blood could be used on humans for medical reasons, everyone pretty much considered it a win-win situation.

But the second the patent period expired, knock-off blood flooded the market with most of it being an inferior product. Some of it tasted worse than rat blood but just like soft drinks, some of the generic stuff was actually pretty good. He poured the packet into a mug and took his first sip. He might have appreciated it more, if he hadn’t sunk his fangs into Buffy last night but after the way her blood has tasted he couldn’t call the alternative anything but palatable. Putting off the inevitable a little while longer he imagined several scenarios where his beautiful woman, sated every single need of his body, mostly after he rescued her from some big bad.

Knowing that he might as well face his fate and getting more worked up by each fantasy knowing full well Buffy wasn’t in the mood, he flipped open his cell.

“You have 36 messages,” It informed him in a calm efficient voice. “Message one: Charles Gunn…message is as follows…”

Spike listened to Gunn curse him and various parts of his anatomy for the first ten messages and then as the messages slipped into double digits he slowly moved on the insult his ancestors. By the final message, he had even degraded his beloved Desoto and that was just one step to far. He pressed auto call and waited for Gunn’s voice to float over the line. “Good morning mum, sorry I didn’t get in before curfew but Buffy and I were busy studding for finals.”

“Cut the shit Spike. Har’tuh is on the warpath and since the news broke about the attack, you and I are at the top of his list. Not only is that bad for business but it’s also bad for our health. So you better have one hell of a story that makes this all better or I‘ll leave your sorry ass twisting in the wind.”

“Har’tuh can bugger off, he’s not our client anymore…she is and let me say she is very satisfied.”

“Please tell me that you did not fuck our client?” Gunn asked sharply, praying for patience.

“Actually she’s my bird now so it was more like making love.”

“Just couldn’t wait to tell someone could you.” Buffy asked from where she had been standing in the doorway the last couple of minutes or so.

Giving up, he slid the phone across the counter to her. “Tell my esteemed partner Gunn, that your father isn’t going to chop him up into filet of lawyer.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’ll deal with Har’tuh you just concentrate on finding out whose behind the hit last night.”

“Miss Summers, Spike tells me that you want our services but unlike my partner I’m a man who thinks of all the angles before diving right in head first. I can’t access any of the files without your name on one of our contracts and until that happens all I can do is pass on the info Har’tuh gave us when the case started.”

“Fine as soon as the call is over transfer the contract and I’ll sign it digitally with Spike as a witness. Once that‘s taken care of I will transfer your fee into your business account. But I am going to tell you the same thing I told Spike, I am the one in charge.”

After the last hours he had been having, he lost the final thread of his patience and for the first time in his career, he lit into a client. “Listen girl, I don’t give a shit whose in charge that’s you and Spike’s problem. But I do care about the angry Fallen One calling me around the clock threatening to feed me my balls on a silver spoon.”

“The key word is Fallen One, while I on the other hand am just full of otherworldly power. I can handle Har’tuh but if you screw this up because you to busy pissing yourself, I’ll be the one holding the spoon. And by the way, the name’s Miss Giles, not girl do I make myself clear?” Buffy told him firmly, her tone clearly reminding him that Hank wasn’t the only dangerous one in the family.

“Yes Ma’am, may I talk to my colleague please?”

With a sweet smile she slid the phone across the counter. “He asked to talk to you.”

“Yes?”

“Damn is she that scary in person?” Gunn asked unable to believe the tiny little woman in the files had him shaking in his seat. No wonder Spike was into her, he thought running a hand over his head.

“You have no idea what my girl can do but before you write her off as a total bitch, I think you should know she rides a 3100 S. The real deal, not that cheap piece of shit you own.”

“Seriously…can I date her when you are finished with her?”

“Watch it mate…I took you bad mouthing my car but don’t go there.” Spike warned, a low growl trickling out of his throat.

“You got a real case on her then?”

Spike looked up at Buffy, meeting her eyes. “Yeah, I love her.”

“Hey, that’s cool if you two get married the bike becomes community property right?”

“You seem awful chipper considering the way this conversation started.”

“I figure your girl will keep her daddy off our back so now that my death is no longer a possibility and my best friends in love leaving a veritable ocean of heartbroken women for me to console, it’s turning out to be a pretty good day.” Gunn said shifting through the papers on his desk before getting back to the matter at hand. “I’ll transfer the data over as soon as we hang up, so let’s focus on keeping your girl alive.”

______________________________________________

After the contracts were signed and transmitted, Buffy had one more phone call to handle. She drafted the press release while the secretary had her on hold. Twenty minutes later, her father’s rich baritone poured through the line. “Are you alright honey?”

“I got shot, thanks to you so yeah I’m peachy.”

“Now honey, I hired you a bodyguard and trust me when I get a hold of them they will….”

“Save the vengeance riff for someone who cares.” She said crossly cutting him off mid sentence. “The boys are working for me now, so if anyone is going to kick their asses it’s gonna be me. The guard you so thoughtfully hired without telling me I needed one, helped me take down the assassin last night. He took a bullet in the process so send them their fee back for a job well done.”

“Consider it done baby, now what else do you need?” Hearing that the guard had actually gotten shot protecting his only child, altered his feelings towards Gunn and Spike Investigations drastically.

“You’re not my father, so why don’t you cut the sweet talk and tell me exactly what in the fuck you got me into this time.”

“I only found out about it the day before yesterday. It’s bad Buffy, maybe even the worst thing you’ve ever faced. But like it or not I am your father and you are going to need my help on this.”

“What I need is for you to stay the hell out of my life and take your friends with you. But since that’s not going to happen anytime soon why don’t you cut the dramatics and tell me what is after me so I can protect myself. Rupert Giles is my father and once I know the details he will be the one I call for help.”

“Damn it Buffy, what did I do that was so wrong.” Hank burst out, having more than enough of her bitterness. “I sent you to a family who loved you in an effort to keep you safe. Your all I had left of your mother and you are the only child I will ever have but I put your needs first.”

“Sure whatever helps you sleep at night Hank.” Buffy shot back mockingly.

“I want an answer Buffy. You owe me that much atleast.”

“You want to know why I hate you? Alright, how about the fact you never think of anyone but yourself. You dump me on the Giles’s and let me know what its like to have something close to a normal life only to rip it all away. All because Har’tuh the Fallen One, refused to stay down where he belonged. All of the others faded from the public arena but you couldn’t stand to leave the spotlight. If you hadn’t been busy playing Hank Summers multi-billionaire extraordinaire then that scum bag reporter wouldn’t have dug into your past looking for a juicy scoop. That article destroyed any chance I ever had to be happy.”

Unable to help herself Buffy began to cry, but the tears did not wash away her anger. Just the opposite, they pushed her to say all the things she had been holding inside since she read the paper that morning. “I had to leave the people I loved because they were only human and weren’t up to fighting the things following me home every single day. But you were, but not once did you ever show up on my doorstep and offer me another home or another chance to start over.”

“Baby if I would have known you wanted me to, I would have been there in a heartbeat. Your right, I made some mistakes and I’m sorry for that but that doesn’t mean we can’t start over now.”

“Too late. I already have a home and I am to old and tired to start trying to go back and fix the past. Unlike you I don’t get to live forever, this is my only shot. So tell me what demon is after me and let me get back to my life.”

“It’s not a demon and it’s not after you because of something I did…it’s after you because of something you did.”

***Once again this story has been nominated for best Spuffy Fic and I am grateful to all of the wonderful readers who are trying to get my work recognized. It means a lot that you enjoy my stories as much as I do, so win or lose I’m happy. But now to the point, as you might recall this story is a little more than a thousand years in the future. You might have noticed by now how nifty the cell phones of the future are. Well the actual telephones are even cooler than that. They can work just like our phones but at the push of a button a live broadcast image can appear on the vid screen allowing you to talk face to face or face to faces. Vid screens are like flat screen TV’s that can display regular programs but also work as two way live cams, broadcasting information back and forth without a ground line connection. Meaning they work off the same invisible transmissions as our cell phones or some technical nonsense that isn’t really important to the story. I think the future references are self explanatory but incase they aren’t this was just a little clarification. But hey if Bill Gates is reading this…give me a call and a few million and I’ll let you buy my idea :)***


She had always known this day would come but she had never expected it to happen like this. It wasn’t something you heard from a phone call, it was something that jumped out of the shadows and pulled you into the dark while you screamed away your last breath. She didn’t have to ask Hank what he was talking about…she had heard enough to know what was hunting her. “Conference in Giles while I go get Spike…I don’t want to tell this story twice.”

Without waiting for an answer, Buffy pushed all of her emotions away. If she wanted to survive this, she needed to let her instinct guide her…not her fear, not the pain…nothing but the need to fight. Going with her emotions had been what had gotten her in this in the first place.

Spike sensed her approach and spoke without looking up from the piles of papers he had spread out across the rug. “This isn’t making a sodden bit of sense. Gunn sent over all the files on your attacker and either our mysterious bad’um doesn’t know he sent a complete ponce after you or he was desperate enough to place his faith on the local talent. Neither scenario makes any sense and no matter how many times I read this I can’t connect the two. If something is after you, it knows you…it knows your strength and your reputation and it even had the element of surprise. So if it wants you dead, it should have sent one of the best hitters in the biz after you but it didn’t. So that means it was suppose to be a message but then the demon didn’t say anything particularly helpful that can’t really be the case either.”

“It’s not…I know what’s after me and it will want to take me on itself. We just assumed the attacks were related but now I know their not. But we don‘t have time to deal with that now.” Buffy said dully, unconcerned about whoever else might be hoping to take her down. Whoever it was couldn’t be as bad as the first one in line, so focusing on anything else was just a waste of energy, she decided knowing full well that Spike wouldn’t see it that way.

He looked up at her fully intending to argue but one look at her face silenced him. A mask of grim determination covered the soft natural lines of her face and she was nearly as pale as him. But it was the look in her eyes that concerned him the most, it was like she was an entirely different person. The lively spark that he had come to expect was no longer dancing in her mossy green eyes…nothing was there. It was like her humanity had gone on vacation and all that was left was an empty house.

People killed, coldly and without mercy while wearing that look on their face. He couldn’t believe she had mastered that look, let alone the intent behind it. Even more terrifying was the fact that it seemed completely natural, like this wasn’t the first time she had worn the face of the reaper.

It scared him down to his toes, stole away every ounce of warmth but not even it could affect his love for her. He was soulless, but he had worn that same look more times than he could count and seeing it on her made him realize that no matter how pretty her life looked on the outside…the swank club, the posh home or even the carefree smiles, her life was anything but a charmed existence. “What is it luv?” He asked getting to his feet and crossing over to take her in his arms.

She let him hold her, knowing that it could be their last embrace but she didn’t try to respond. “Hank and Giles are waiting on the phone for us in my office. I have a few things to say and if you want to leave me after you hear them…I’ll understand.”

“Bugger that pet. I knew before I came here with you that you weren’t like other girls so I’m not about to cry foul and run away because it’s not something that will change. Your past and your present are what define who you are and who you will become and I don’t want to miss a moment of it. You’re special Buffy Summers or Buffy Giles or any other damn name you chose to call yourself….nothing can change that or the way I feel about you.”

She believe him but as much as she loved the image of herself reflected back at her from his eyes, he didn’t know the real truth about her. Until he knew everything, the good the bad and the very bloody, she wouldn’t be able to accept him or all that he was offering her. After watching Angel evolve into a person she couldn’t understand or love she wasn’t going to put Spike through the same thing. She wouldn’t let him love a lie or a vague misconception of the real her. He may dress and act like a big bad but in his heart and words she could see he was a romantic. He wanted moonbeams and lightning bolts and an eternal unyielding love that defied the fates and time itself. She had understood long ago that she wasn’t a simple girl traveling down the yellow brick road trying to find her way home to a white picket fence in a black and white reality where people loved her unconditionally. Her path was built on blood and broken bones and the macabre world that was her home was painstakingly highlighted in vivid Technicolor.

She wouldn’t drag him down into the darkness with her but if he loved her enough to stay…then she would do whatever it took to live in his world. Thinking about him, the way he made her feel broke the lock on the box holding her emotions and like Pandora she couldn’t force it closed again. She might not make it to see another sunrise and he could walk out of her door before then, so she wanted to say the words…no she had to say the words while she still had the chance. “I love you.”

He had been waiting for those words and more than anything he wanted to say them back…but he couldn’t. Not when they sounded like goodbye. Without knowing how it had happened he had somehow become the girl in their relationship. He wanted moonbeams and lightning bolts and right now she content to be trapped in minutiae of death threats and demons. Granted those were big concerns, for normal people but for the daughter of a Fallen One and a Vampire it was just another part of their lives. It pinched his masculine pride but he wasn’t some nancy boy who didn’t know his own worth. He was love’s bitch but atleast he was man enough to admit it…atleast to himself he rationalized. “Tell me again when this is all over, luv. Because when you say it, I want to know that your only thinking about me and not about everything else that is going on at the time.”

That alone said he loved her more than his earlier poetic vows of adoration, she decided. If the situation had been reversed, it was the same thing she would have told him. There might be something to this soul mate thing after all, she thought with a grin. Because right now Spike suited her down to the ground, wicked eyes and hands, the body of an Adonis and enough strength to do what had to be done. So far he possessed all the qualities she desired in her ideal mate, heartbeats and souls being optional of course, but it was time to see how he handled another bit of her past. If he couldn’t deal…well then soul mates were just an idea cooked up by the hologreeting and chocolate companies after all.

“There’s something else you need to know before we go in there.” She began, before telling him about her job with the Initiative. He may have heard her tell Angel she was a slayer but being a fly-by-night, government backed demon exterminator was an entirely different matter. Every demon and half demon knew they existed but just like the Pentagon handled humans claming to see UFO’s and little green men from Mars, the US government denied their existence. They were nothing more than a rumor, plausible deniability at it’s finest. A group of vicious demons end up in little pieces overnight, it was vigilantes, nothing more and so on and so forth. But since Demons trusted the government about as much as those strange men with Tellurium foil over their heads to block out telepathic alien transmissions, they knew the truth was indeed out there and that it would come for them some dark night.

He watched her chew her bottom lip anxiously awaiting his reaction and he shot her a quick wink to put her at ease. “Don’t fret pet, it’s sounds pretty much like my line of work.”

“You protect people Spike, I hunt them down and take them out. Those are entirely different things.”

Since that was exactly the opening he had been looking for, he decided to let her in on another one of his secrets. “I recon you killed things that needed killing pet, but I’m not actually a bodyguard. Gunn roped me into this hoping that Har’tuh would send more clients our way. I’m actually an authorized slayer but unlike you I don’t work for free. Gunn handles the legal angles while I’m the guy you call to hunt down the big bad wolf who forgot they were suppose to be domesticated these days.”

The words of the demon that attacked her, floated through the cloud of shock that had permeated her brain at his announcement. “William the Bloody, lycanthrope slayer…Spike…it all makes sense. I can’t believe I didn’t catch it before, I mean Spike isn’t really a common name but I just thought that it meant your…” Without meaning to her eyes traveled down to his crotch.

Since she no longer looked like a serial killer, he gave a little wiggle just to keep the look at bay a little longer. “Careful there luv, you’ll give a man a complex with talk like that. The name may have come from my much talked about proclivity for taking out werewolves with silver plated railroad spikes but after our spin in the shower, you know the other fits as well.”

Unable to help herself, she blushed like a schoolgirl. She had sucked and licked her tongue over every inch of his cock while the warm water beat down over them and she had, had a lot to work with. Adding that tasty tidbit and the fact that someone called William the Bloody by other slayers no less, would never accuse her of being too vicious in the line of duty or otherwise, it turned out that he might just be the perfect man for her after all. But until he knew everything, she would just have to wait and see.

Realizing that she wanted to get back to business, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and led her the rest of the way back to her office. Pausing in the doorway he leaned down and whispered in her ear, as her face began to slide back into it’s somber lines and her earlier amusement evaporated like steam. “But if you want, you can tell your mates which ever reason you prefer.”

Since she knew which one he would prefer, she didn’t bother to answer and walked back over to her desk where her phone was still sitting off the hook. She pressed a button and watched as two familiar faces appeared on the vid screen attached to the wall. She introduced both men to Spike and then took a deep breath before beginning her story and going back to that day in her mind.

“We had been chasing a pack of demons through South America. They were your standard hostiles, tearing through impoverished villages and munching on the locals but they were adapt at evading capture or a confrontation with us. After about a week we caught up with them at some ruins in Peru and it seemed like all of the fight had gone out of them. We took them down without so much as breaking stride. It wasn’t until later that we found out they were offering themselves as a sacrifice to their god Muerte Viva or Living Death.”

Out of all the people in the room, Spike also the living dead, didn’t really see why everyone else was still flinching as the sound of the name faded from the room. “So it’s a vampire then…stake to the heart, cut off the head, a little holy water or sunlight and poof big pile of ash. Not exactly the harbinger of fear, in any book even if it‘s a so called god. I mean no offence Har’tuh but not everyone gets all trembly at the mention of someone claiming to have been given his godhead.”

“He wasn’t just a god, he was worshiped as one but in truth he had much more power…he was the head of the vampire bloodline.” Giles explained, whipping off his glasses impatiently. “He was one of the Ancient, the ones that ruled the earth after eons of darkness. They lost their purchase on the land at the time of creation, the dawn of man. The lesser demons were destroyed during the first days of light but the stronger ones, like Living Death, retreated back into the underworld or fled this dimension entirely. Living death, wished to one day rule this world again so he infected humanity with his blood to ensure that when he gathered enough strength to return, an army of his bloodline would be waiting for him.”

“He wasn’t the only pure blooded vampire,” Hank interrupted. “But he was the consort of the First and he was given his godhead as a blessing. He used that power to build his temple of resurrection near what would become Chavín de Huantar sometime around 950 BC. At the time the Kingdom of Chavin believed that their temple was the center of the world and it was revered as a holy Mecca. Every known religion flocked to this place seeking their god after the rumors of strange creatures with inhuman power could be found in there. For centuries demons of every kind tried to restore Living Death to power hoping that they in turn would be blessed by the First for their service. I myself went there many times hoping for the same thing, but I could not call the demon forth.” Hank explained looking at his daughter sheepishly.

“Is that how you knew he was back?” Buffy asked hoping that it was something like that. “You felt his energy return or something?”

“No, he sought me out. I thought it had been because the First had been the one to bless me with my powers but he came to me, looking for you.”

Buffy caught the flare of pride dancing in his eyes and decided to cut short his happy little delusion of her following in his footsteps. “Sorry Hank but I wasn’t the one who let him free. The demons had used their deaths to call him forth thinking that it would inhabit one of their bodies but he chose someone else. The fresh blood called him out but he needed a living host. The body of the man you met with had cut his leg during the chase. It was tiny, barely more than a scratch but there had been just enough blood to drip a few drops onto the ground during the fight. After being locked away below the ground in his sarcophagus for a few thousand millennia he was nothing more than vapor. I and the rest of the team watched helplessly as he was surrounded by the green smoke rising out of the ground and I held his hand while Living Death consumed him from the inside out.”

“Why didn’t you destroy him before the change could become permanent?” Spike asked softly, knowing that something was missing out of the story. He had seen Buffy at the club and she had even admitted that she always went for the kill. So what stopped her that day, he wondered. He searched her face as she gathered her thoughts and he knew whatever it was, it was going to be bad.

*** I want to thank everyone who voted for my fic. I can't believe I won and it is a real honor to know that you all are enjoying this story. Thanks! ***

Buffy looked at Spike and gave him pained smile. “Because his wife begged me not to kill the father of her unborn child. It was suppose to be their last mission together and even though I knew what I had to do…I just couldn’t. With the rest of the team’s help we unearthed the sarcophagus and locked him away again. That was my last mission and less than three months later I heard it had all been for nothing. Samantha lost the baby and then she took her own life.”

“I’m not saying what you did was right but I can understand why you made that choice, honey.” Giles told her softly hoping to ease some of the obvious pain in her voice. “It was an act of compassion and I can’t blame you for following your heart.”

“It was an act of guilt not one out of compassion.” Buffy admitted, banishing her father’s illusions of it being a noble act. “After I signed on with the Initiative, Riley and I got involved. I didn’t know he was married until Sam snagged a transfer into our unit nearly three years later. We never told her and when she asked me not to kill him…I thought it was the only way I could make up for what I did to her.”

“You weren’t the one who was married Buffy, so that means your not the one to blame.” Spike told her calmly.

Buffy thought about Sam‘s anguished pleas not to kill him as she brought the blade down near his throat. She had been ready to kill her lover while Sam begged for her only love. “Sure it was, because I was still seeing him when he died. He offered to divorce her as soon as I knew the truth but I didn’t mind being the other woman. He was the kind of guy all girls are supposed to fall in love with and I was no exception. He was my ticket into a normal life and I was prepared to settle down and ignore the fact that our sex life was about as exciting as melting ice-cream. Out of bed he was amazing, someone you could talk to or depend on, but in bed he was only good. When I found out about his wife, it was gave me the fire I had been looking for and none of the obligations. I knew he loved both of us, but I didn’t really love him, just the idea of him. So I should have just stepped back and let her have him and by not killing him, I had my chance to make amends.”

She forced herself to meet Giles eyes. She didn’t care what Hank thought of her but she did care about what Giles thought of her actions. She had known what she doing and if she couldn’t meet his eyes then that proved she was ashamed. She wasn’t but now it was painfully obvious she wasn’t a perfect daughter and the story wasn‘t over yet. “To make matters worse, she and I became friends. During the day I was her best friend but then at night I would sneak away for a quick tryst with her husband. So I think it is safe to say that I deserve whatever happens to me.”

“Bollocks, you weren’t the one who was married. Hate to disillusion you luv, but you’re not the first woman to fall in with a married man. But the real question is would you have started up with him at all if you had know he was married?” Spike asked quickly, uncomfortable for her. He could see how hard it was to admit these things to her fathers but for him it wasn’t that big of a deal. He had fallen for a married bird once and he knew first hand what it was like to find out that they belonged to someone else. No one walked out of that kind of situation unscathed and if this Riley sot had been so perfect, he wouldn’t have lied to get Buffy into his bed, Spike decided, more than willing to blame him entirely.

She didn’t even have to think about it. “No but that doesn’t change anything. I know what I did was wrong but since it is my fault, I owe you an apology Hank. It was unfair of me to instantly assume all of this was because of you.”

“Usually it is, so no harm done.” Hank said with an elegant shrug. After centuries of watching humans, he could clearly see how his choices had affected her. She had been right when she said he had ruined her chance at a normal life but he would do whatever it took to help her find the kind of life she wanted. Whether she liked it or not, he was her father and now was his chance to prove it, he thought to himself. “So how are you planning on dealing with Living Death?”

“I’m going to kill him the way I should have all those years ago.” Buffy stopped and looked at Giles expectantly. “So does anyone have any idea how? I was leaning towards good old fashioned violence but I don‘t know if that will really work.”

“He isn’t immortal, but he is powerful. Jenny and I will try to discover anything else that might be of use to you. Weaknesses and the like.” Giles stopped for a few moments to look at her. She was a strong warrior yet she was so incredibly fragile on the inside that he was constantly amazed by her. He couldn’t condone her affair or condemn her for it but he could put her at ease. “What you did doesn’t make you a bad person Buffy, just flawed and weak like the rest of us. It may be hard to believe but those very things are what make us human. The fact that you can honestly admit to your mistakes, makes me proud of you. In my own youth, I made a lot of missteps and it took me years to admit to them.”

“You’re not disappointed in me?” Buffy asked hesitantly.

“It’s not something I expected of you but it is your life Buffy. You alone must make your way through it and despite your recent revelations, nothing could make me care for you any less.”

Forgetting that Hank was watching and hearing every word, she reached her hand out to Giles on the vid monitor. “Thanks dad.”

Spike noticed the brief flash of pain in Hank’s eyes. She was clearly his one weakness and that was something they had in common. “Hank, could you use your connections to discover anything on him as well?”

“I am already on it. The second I discover anything I will transmit it to you. My entire staff is working the problem and they are the best money can buy, so we’ll know something by nightfall.” Hank told him, carefully avoiding his daughter’s eyes. He didn’t want to see the love she held there for Giles and he had no right to expect to see it there for him. Someday, he hoped he would but until that day nothing mattered but keeping her safe.

“Thanks Hank,” Buffy said giving him an easy smile. She was far from ready to sign up for a father-daughter picnic but she was slowly warming up to the man who had given her life.

Not trusting his voice, he nodded and clicked off the connection before the first tear left his eyes. I’ll make it up to you baby, he silently vowed before shuffling through his papers and getting to work.

Shortly after Hank broke the connection so did Giles, leaving her alone with Spike. They sat alone a few moments in the uncomfortable silence and then she asked the question that was foremost on her mind. “So what about you…do you still want to give this relationship idea a try?”

“I’m not going anywhere luv and maybe if I tell you that enough, you‘ll finally believe me.” He ruffled his hand through her hair and pulled her close for a tender kiss. She melted against him like wax and he had no doubt that she was satisfied with their sex life…but it didn’t hurt to get a few things straight. “I am going to be the only man who ever makes you burn this way. From now on there isn’t anyone else for either of us.”

She pulled away as if he had slapped her. “I may have slept with a married man but I don‘t cheat on my lovers. I wasn‘t even with anyone else while I was with him even though he went home to Sam every night.”

He shook his head and brushed her hair back off of her face. “None of that matters to me. I ended up in the same situation myself but like you I don’t stray. I didn’t say that because I doubted you, I said it because I wanted you to know that you’re the only one who matters to me. If Riley had mattered you would have never tolerated him being with her. I want to matter to you.”

“She was his wife first, so it was kinda hard to complain.” Buffy teased, hoping to lighten the mood.

He was used to her running away when their conversations became intense, but this time he wasn‘t having it. “A scrap of paper isn’t enough to bind two people together. It takes more than that and even if he wanted you, his love for her should have stopped him. But it didn’t and you didn’t love him enough to fight for him. I’d fight for you luv and that’s what love is all about. That‘s stronger than any piece of paper or band of silver.”

“Sometimes I don’t understand you.” Buffy searched his face, trying to unravel the puzzle before her but nothing seemed to add up. “You are a legendary slayer but you have the heart of a poet.”

“I lead with my heat Buffy, it’s one of my strengths and something tells me it’s one of yours as well. My sister and I grew up in one of the homeless centers in England. Our parents dropped us off one day and headed off to a life without children. Dru’s always been special and my snooty parents thought she was an embarrassment to their perfect gene pool.”

He snorted and pursed his lips. “Originally they intended to keep me, being the heir apparent and all but I refused to leave her. When I turned eighteen I became her legal guardian. At the time she was sixteen and I was working several jobs to earn enough money to pay the rent and keep us from starving. Two years later they died, leaving me enough money to last us both several lifetimes. I moved to a flat in New York hoping to give Dru a fresh start. One day she went out to paint in the park across the street and she was attacked by a rogue shifter. I waited for the local slayer to bring her attacker down but after a month it was still out there while she was in a shifter complex trying to adjust to her newfound beast. I became a vampire to give her some justice.”

“But didn’t you know that vampires and lycans don’t get along? The beast and the demon feel compelled to fight for dominance if they are contained in the same space for any period of time. Why not just become a lycanthrope?”

“I wasn’t about to become the same thing that had nearly killed her. But I didn’t know about the nature of the relationship between the two. Luckily Dru’s powers grew with the change and she has absolute control over her beast. She is nearly one-hundred and seventy five years old but she doesn’t appear a day over twenty, which is why most people assume she is a vampire. Everyone knows that lycanthropes age slower than the average human but I think her other powers are helping to amplify the inherit abilities of the wolf. But she now spends ninety percent of her time in a world that others can’t see and the rest of the time she is completely lucid and in this world.” He broke off for a moment, overcome by emotion and reached out to take her hand. “She’s trapped in between worlds just like you and I.

“You’re to strong to be trapped anywhere Spike.” She brushed her hand through his curls, like you would when you were comforting a small child. “The hardest thing to do in this world is live in it, but you have. I refuse to believe that fate alone defines who we are inside. Every choice and every action can re-write the story of our lives. I alone will decide where I want to be.”

“Where is that pet?”

“Right here in your arms.” She slid off of her seat and glided onto his lap. She kissed her way down his neck, letting the taste of his skin chase away the bitter recollections of their pasts.

She could lose herself in his body, the finely honed angles of his chest and the sharp lines of his hips pressing against her thighs. It was so easy, almost like she could slip out of her skin and find solace beneath his. She didn’t consider herself the kind of woman he needed to be protected or sheltered but she found his innate ability to soothe her oddly erotic. He made her feel safe in a world determined to destroy her and it was something she never knew she wanted to feel.

Stunned, she met his eyes and was unsure of what would happen next.

He could sense the change in her, the yielding of her muscles as her tough as nails exterior collapsed around her. It had happened without warning, surprising them both. For him it was like catching a snowflake in his palms during the middle of hottest summer. No two snowflakes were the same, each one that fell to earth was intricately craved by the clouds sheltering them, defining them as something different upon closer reflection. She may look like the other women of this world but she was truly an original. Which now that he thought about it, for her that meant she was also alone in a way that no other being would understand. There would always be other humans, other vampires and demons but there would only be one daughter of a Fallen One. She didn’t belong because she was never meant to be of this world. All of the attempts on her life were the fates way of righting the world once again, but she refused to dissipate. She would not vanish by dispersion like ashes upon the wind and to remain unconquered. To do so she had to enclose her true nature behind a shield of unyielding steel.

Now, that defense had fallen and she was exposed and vulnerable. He wasn’t willing to believe that even in this state of emotional emergence that she was without defenses. His girl was to strong to ever surrender entirely. So even if he said the wrong thing or took the wrong course here and now he knew she wouldn’t shatter like glass beneath the rush of a hammer. But since you couldn’t fix something that wasn’t broken what she would do was a thousand times worse. She would cocoon herself away in her metal prison never to let this aspect of her nature free again. He wanted all of her, every part between the warrior and the innocent woman and he refused to lose a piece now. A million words crowded his mind wishing to slide between his lips but he went with what his heart was telling him. “What are you thinking luv?”

Slowly, she raised her face up to his. “Where do we go from here?”

“Time has a way of pushing you to move on before you’re ready. You look down at the clock expecting to see hours remaining yet there are only seconds left as time slowly winds it’s way down to the end. Mortals speed through life hoping to experience everything but they lose the simple pleasure of experiencing a single thing in it’s entirety. It’s like flipping to the next song before the first is finished just to see what’s coming next and our song if far from over yet. Don’t turn away, don’t hide or close your eyes just be still…here with me now. We will catch up with the ticking clock soon enough but for now, let’s just savor the way we are at this moment.” He stroked his hands down her face, soothing away the unspoken fears of the future that waited for them.

“I don’t know if I can. I want to just let go and invest myself in you, devote myself to us. But us, always ends up being me. I am good at being alone, being me instead of we. Then you come out of nowhere and before I knew it had happened I was drowning in you. You make me feel things I never expected, want things I have never wanted. It scares me. In our lives there is a real possibility that one of us could die in the very near future. More than likely it will be me that goes first but if it is you, I have to have something to hold onto when that happens.”

“Hold onto me luv,” he lifted her hands up and placed them on his shoulders. “Never let go and I swear that you will never be alone. Death can’t steal away what we have and even if it’s just the memories that remain, something of me will always be with you.”

Willing to take the chance, to trust in him, she gripped him tightly. Meeting his eyes, she traced her thumbs across his collar bone and sucked her bottom lip into her mouth. She saw the desire color his eyes a deep smoky blue and slid up his thighs positioning herself just above his throbbing erection. She writhed against him, through the thick fabric of their jeans, stoking the moist heat gathering between her legs.

Growling low in his throat his fisted his hand in her hair and pulled her close for a bruising kiss. He had barely began to explore the delights of her mouth, when they heard the door bell chime. He was more than willing to ignore the unwanted interruption but since she was already pulling away, he could tell she wasn’t. He trailed his hands down to her ass, hoping to sway her priories but she was proving to be a hard woman to convince.

“Sorry baby, but it could be important. We can pick this up later.” She disentangled his hands, which seemed like he had sprouted a few more judging by how many times she had freed herself only to find another hand somewhere else on her body. To solve the problem she took both of his hands in hers and finally managed to make her way back to her feet. Which sounded good in theory but sucked when it was applied to the reality of the moment. Doorbells should never come before a sexy vampire with a mouth as skilled as his. For a second…okay a few seconds, she nearly crawled back into his lap but like she had said, it could be important.

Resigned but not very happy about it, she made her way to the front door. She flipped the intercom to on, “Yes?”

“Charles Gunn, looking for my so called partner. He’s an annoying bleached blonde who goes by the name of Spike. Is he around by any chance?”

Buffy opened the door and gave the attractive black man waiting there a considering look. He was impeccably dressed in a sleek tailored suit, with a steel gray shirt underneath and his oxfords were as shiny as his gleaming head. “You know I was beginning to wonder about you two.”

“Don’t even go there baby,” Gunn said leering at her appreciatively. “Talk like that makes a man want to prove himself and something tells me that my business partner wouldn’t appreciate me stealing his girl.”

“You got that right mate.” Spike said walking over to the door. “Kiss my girl and I’ll break your pretty face.”

“Did I interrupt something, because your looking a little tense, while your girl here looks as calm as a kitten. Is the honeymoon over already?” Gunn shot back.

“I have a name and believe it or not I can hear you. If this is how you two treat all your clients, you should just close up shop.” Buffy said stepping back to let Gunn inside.

Spike wrapped one arm around Gunn’s shoulders and the other around hers. “Your not a client luv, your family. So the standard client relationship rules don‘t apply.”

She caught Gunn blanche out of the corner of her eye and since he was obviously Spike’s friend she wanted to be his friend as well. “Don’t worry Charles, you don’t have to return my money.”

“I grew up poor, so I appreciate money and all the things it can buy but Spike’s right, you’re not just a client.” When Spike jaw fell open, Gunn had to grin. “So I’ll take ten percent off and give you the family rate.”

“Keep your ten percent and keep the annoying guy talk behind closed doors where it belongs.” Buffy countered.

“Deal.” Gunn said before Spike could complain. He liked her all ready. He had known she was hot from the photos Har’tuh had provided but he hadn’t expected her to be so personable. Most girls that looked like her, were either sluts or bitches and even though that was a broad generalization it had always been true in his case. Atleast until he had met Lita and now it seemed like Spike had lucked out as well. “I got some information on your attacker. Words out that a powerful demon is after you and he was hoping to make a name for himself by taking you out. He was small time, hoping to go big and you seemed like the easiest route.”

“Bet he’s rethinking that about now.” Spike said walking over to sit on one of the sofas. He was completely at home at her place and it was sure as hell, a lot more posh than his flat. Despite the fact his sister was an artist, his place was sparsely decorated and completely devoid of the little feminine touches that Buffy sprinkled liberally through her own home. “But we already guessed as much already.”

Knowing that Gunn needed to be briefed on the situation but she really didn’t want to go through it all again. Since she was sure Spike would understand, she decided to leave it up to him. “I’ve got a load of work I need to take care of since I’m out of the Styx until this is over. So why don’t you two catch up while I get to it.”

Both men watched her leave and Gunn shot Spike a look. “Was it something I said?”

“Nah, she’s had a rough morning.” He reached over to where he had left his smokes on the coffee table. Thumbing one out, he pulled it to his mouth and after he lit it, he told Gunn what they had learned this morning. He left out some of the more indelicate details, not because he thought they would cast Buffy in a bad light but because he knew she was still sensitive about the entire subject in general.

“I’ve know the Giles’s, they do good work. Their the ones we called in to testify in that wrongful execution suit brought against us by the worshippers of Moloch.”

“That crazy demon who tried to take over the virtuanet?”

“That was the one. He killed five people by mystical malfeasance and we still landed in court after we had Wes perform the exorcism. One of the victims was only fifteen and his parents asked us to take the case.” Gunn hadn’t called Spike in because it wasn’t in his area of expertise, so he gave him a brief recap. “We uncovered the other victims more than satisfying the burden of evidence needed to obtain the order of execution but when it hit the news we still had to explain our actions in court. Rupert testified to the scope of Moloch’s powers while Jenny who is a Technopagan, explained how far spread his reach had become.”

“It’s a sad state of affairs when it’s easier to kill humans than demons these days. You should have heard the cop lecturing Buffy about taking down the demon in her club. She was the one who was shot and he was more concerned about the unconscious demon on the floor.” Spike said stubbing his smoke out in the, delicate glass dish with fluted edges that Buffy called an ashtray.

“You’re preachin to the choir here but then again lawyers have always been the scum of the earth. So I guess that puts me closer to the gray area of the judicial system as it relates to homicide.” Gunn settled back in his seat and gave Spike a shrew look. “But enough about that, lets get down to what’s really important. What’s it gonna take to talk your girl into let me take her bike out for a ride?”

Buffy rejoined them after a short while and they spent the day getting to know each other. They traded demons tales, life tales and more than a few embarrassing stories. It was like three friends getting together and having a good time but the threat of Living Death, overshadowed the entire event. It was impossible to have a great time when a demon was out there waiting to kill you but Buffy still had to admit that it had been fun. She barely spent time with her own friends anymore and it was nice to remember what it was like to not only live in the world but be a part of it as well.

When Gunn left, a few hours before nightfall Buffy hoped that they all could do it again real soon when things were back to normal…well her version of normal anyway. She couldn’t wait to introduce Spike and Gunn to Willow and Oz. Spike had told a story about him and Gunn at a Dingoes concert only to have the great music spoiled by an impromtu demon attack and she resisted telling them that she knew the band. That would be a surprise she sprung on them another day, she thought with a smile.

While she gathered up the cartons of takeout she realized that she was no longer surprised at how she instantly wrote Spike into her future. She wasn’t willing to buy the star-crossed lovers throughout time angle but she was willing to believe that love made it own rules along the way. Love had somehow become a very frequent guest in her life and vocabulary, after years of blighted or meaningless affairs and that just proved that things happen at the time you least expect them. What was weird is how perfect it seemed to fit. She had always expected love to pinch given her lifestyle and her past relationships but with Spike it just felt right. She turned to share that thought with Spike and the words caught in her throat.

She was looking at Spike and everything looked the same but his eyes were a virulent green. Her mind recalled the last time she had seen those toxic eyes staring back at her from a face twisted in pain, only this time she was the one suffering. “What do you want?”

“Is that anyway to treat an old lover?” Living Death asked her with Spike’s voice.

“Your not either of them, you’re just the thing wearing their skin.”

“True enough but their memories are mine. Tell me Buffy, what would you do to save your new lover?”

“I’ve seen this act, remember? I don’t know how you did it this time but just like before Spike isn’t going to come back.” Buffy said putting her hands behind her back so he couldn’t see them shaking. She had to be strong while she faced his killer and when he was dead…then she would fall apart and mourn for what she had lost just at the moment she thought she had everything.

“I am death personified and this body is of the dead. I simply filled him with life…my life force to be exact. But unlike Riley Finn, this can be a temporary joining. I can leave this shell at anytime and return to my host body and your vampire will have no memory of this encounter.” He stepped forward to her in a long rolling gait that was so different from Spike’s that she felt the first tears prick her eyes. “What would you give for me to spare him?”

“What do you want?”

“You.” When she stepped away, he shook his head arrogantly. “Can’t you lesser beings ever think beyond matters of the flesh. You constantly feast on each other like parasites and call it love. You and those like you will never become more than that, if you continued to degrade yourselves in such an unbecoming manner. While I have ascended past such false acts of human perversion to a power the likes of which you have never known nor could comprehend.”

He sounded so unlike Spike that her mind instinctively clicked into gear. “So if it’s not sex you’re after what could I possibly offer something like you?”

“Power.” He ran his hand down in front off her body, never touching anything but the air around her. “I feel the raw untamed magicks inside you. They are held back from their true purpose by your humanity and I wish to harness them for my own. In your form, my power will be unmatched in this dimension and I alone will rule this world.”

Unable to help herself, her eyes trailed over to the portrait hanging on the wall. It only proved to her what she was fighting for and it wasn‘t some unknown destiny. What was worth fighting for was right here in front of her. She turned her eyes back to where Living death stood. “So you want to get in touch with your feminine side by taking me over. But that doesn’t explain why you’re here making deals instead of taking what you want by force. All that power you claim to have and you’re afraid to fight one woman chock full of human perversion. Score one for us parasites, huh.”

He backhanded her, knocking her several steps back. She could feel a small amount of blood drip down to her tongue from where she had bit the inside of her cheek and that just pissed her off and steeled her resolve. Emotion pain was something she never understood but dealing with physical pain was as natural as breathing for her. “Impressive but I’m not exactly trembling in fear.”

“You are afraid, just not for yourself.” Living Death told her coldly. “You’re afraid of what happens to him and that makes you weak in a way losing the other did not. Like your father, the once noble Har’tuh before you, you have allowed the living, the mortals of this world to bind you with your feelings. To assume a new living host after my first reincarnation, they must willingly surrender to death. Or else I would have taken you the moment I escaped my sarcophagus. So what I am proposing is a trade, his life for yours.”

“And if I say thanks but no thanks and save the world instead?”

“Then you save all but the one person that matters to you. I can keep this body indefinably since he is already dead and I will if you dare to refuse my most generous offer. Who will you chose, yourself and the faceless others of this realm or the one who touched your cold heart? Chose wrong and I will bring death to everyone you know but it will always be the one I let live that will haunt you. Sooner or later the idea of him, locked away until the end of time in a prison of his own flesh will drive you to escape into death. You will spill your own blood or allow yourself to lose in battle and either way at that moment of surrender I will still win.”

“I’ve never been the type to surrender.” She bluffed desperately, sounding as if she was telling the truth. Not even the slightest flicker of deception showed itself on her face or in her eyes.

Smiling evilly, like the devil collecting his due he let his eyes fade back to blue and spoke in a voice sure to convince her in a way that his own could not. “As you can see, I can assume him utterly. I see the pain in your eyes just as I saw you yield in his arms through his memories. Much like Samantha Finn you will succumb to your lovers pleas and in time you will forget that I am not him. I whispered in her ear, in his voice begging her to come to me and free me from my unnatural tomb. At first she resisted and then I told her that you had locked him away from her to keep him for yourself. I told her every intimate detail of your liaisons and soon enough she hastened to take her place at her husbands side to prove her steadfast devotion. She splashed her blood over the ground above me and before her life slipped away she found peace in a final embrace.” He touched her face the way he knew Spike would have caressed her. A light touch of his palm over her check and a soft stoke of his thumbs across her lips.

When she pulled away with misery flooding her eyes, he knew he had already won but he wanted to seal the deal entirely. “I offer you the same chance now. Until this day becomes the next I will allow you to spend the passing hours with him. But at the dawn, when the worlds of the darkness and the light merge for a single moment I expect you to offer me your life willingly so that we may become one as well. The choice is yours luv…will you fight the inevitable or will you surrender so that he may live another day?”

She had already made her choice before she learned the truth behind Samantha’s death. But hearing Spike’s voice and knowing that it wasn’t him was enough to prove that it was the right one. She would not make him pay for her past and she loved him to much to walk away when she had the power to save him. The day of her death had always been on the distant horizon and by agreeing to this deal she had a chance to make her last day, better than all the ones before. She would have to break Spike’s heart to protect him and that would be harder to bear than taking her own life but they both had to be done. She would die at dawn but she would do everything in her power to ensure that he was free come the sunrise. He would live on and through him, like he had said she would never truly die. “Where do we meet?”

*** I used a small portion of dialog from Seeing Red and Fool for Love, I altered it somewhat but I figured I would give you a heads up! As always, it‘s there work not mine, I‘m just borrowing it for a bit.***

“You alright luv, you look like you‘ve seen a ghost?” Spike asked, laying his palm against her face.

Since that was the truth, she had to smile. “I’m alright, my brain was just catching up after all those stimulating stories.”

“I’m feeling pretty simulated myself.” He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer. “Now that we’re finally alone, I believe that you promised to pick up where we left off.”

“Spike,” she laid her hand on his chest, unable to meet his eyes. “Can we just spend the rest of the day together and forget about what is coming next. No phones, no demons waiting in the shadows, just take the entire day and live in the moment.” Because it is our last, she added silently.

“I’d love to, but the timing is all wrong Buffy. You’re in danger and we can’t just ignore that.”

“Why not? I’m always in danger, there is always something after me. So why can’t I have a single day that belongs to me…is that really so much to ask for?”

“When we defeat the Living Death, then we will take a day for ourselves. But right now we have to deal with that, it has to be the main priority.”

“So I guess all your pretty declarations were just nonsense after all. I played this game with Angel, demons before girlfriends, and I don’t really feel like starting it over again with you. It’s my life on the line and I am willing to put you first, so why can’t you do the same for me?” She asked pulling away, not just physically but mentally. She couldn’t keep him, so she knew she had to prepare herself. The old adage, you had to be cruel to be kind was suppose to play out later in the day but she wasn’t sure she could do it if she spent another moment in his arms. Only hours remained before her date with death and she had wanted to spend them with him. But now that she thought about it, that wasn’t fair…to either of them.

She had told him she would need something to hold onto if he died and now she wanted to give him something to help him cope with her death. He loved with his whole being and that meant he would mourn her with the same passion. She had hoped to live forever as a glided angel in his memories but by tomorrow she would have fallen from grace and become a demon. In her heart she knew that it would be him that would have to destroy the thing she had become and he would never strike the killing blow if he still cherished her in his heart. Just like she had been unwilling to let Living Death consume him. By letting go of the one thing she had left to hold onto, she would be giving him the strength to do what had to be done.

She had to be selfless and even if he never knew or understood why she had chosen this path, it would mean something to her. Living Death had taken away her options, but she still had atleast one choice she could make. This would be her final gift to Spike, the last declaration of her love and it would carry her from this world into the next. Even to her own mind it sounded like a comforting lie and more than anything she wanted to tell him the truth. But she couldn’t. He couldn’t fight this anymore than she could and all the truth would do is kill them both.

She was complacent about her own death, she had faced the possibility for so long it was hard to be distraught now that it was actually going to happen. But the thought of him being a slave for all eternity, was worse than having him reduced to nothing more than ash. Death, was in a way just another part of life…any life even for a vampire. But he deserved more than a life trapped in between two worlds.

Her mind set, she prepared to bleed him without a single mark to show for the pain she was about to inflict. He would hate her and she could bear that, if it meant he lived to see tomorrow. “I can’t believe I was actually starting to buy into this love crap.”

“What in the bloody hell is going on with you?” He asked searching his mind for any explanation that would explain the complete 360 she was pulling and he just kept coming up blank. What could have happened in the last couple of minutes that was strong enough to rip them apart, he wondered searching her face for some sign.

“I’m just tired of being the least important thing in my lovers lives. I mean with my track record you think I would have learned my lesson by now, but nope I just keep hooking up with loser after loser.” She said reaching over to select an apple from the bowl resting on the counter. Not because she was hungry, but because she couldn’t meet his eyes yet.

“Why don’t you tell me what got you all fired up and let’s go from there.”

“Let’s not, cuz to be honest, if I have to hear you profess your undying love one more time…I think I will be sick. You’re what a hundred and fifty, so I’m betting that I’m not the first girl you’ve used those moves on…only this time, you picked the wrong girl.” She gestured with the apple. “Don’t get me wrong, it was fun for awhile. Kinda like being in one of those musicals with the curtain closing on an impassioned kiss, with the rising music and what not. but it’s not exactly my scene. Give me sweaty bodies writhing to the beat and men who don’t bother to pretend its more than what it really is.”

“Enlighten me pet, what is it exactly?”

“Sex…great sex sure, but still just sex.”

“When did you come to that sodden revelation?”

“When I listened to your friend talk in the slow way of his and started to wonder if his technique in the sack was as dedicated as his courtroom style. You know a brief yet powerful opening statement then off with the clothes until a verdict could be reached.” She took another bite of her apple, forcing the fruit down her throat while her stomached churned with guilt. “You might have forever to spend experiencing the same thing over and over again but me…well let’s just say I don’t mind trying something new.”

He didn’t consider himself a patient man by any means but her words were enough to convince a saint to commit murder. Up till now he had been tolerant of her relationship phobias, hell he had been the epitome of understanding and this was what he got in return. Not bloody damn likely, he thought grabbing her arm. “You’re scared about what I can make you feel and your afraid to let me in.”

“I think the word you are looking for is bored.” She told him coldly, jerking her arm away. “I don’t want to spend my days having lengthy discussions about where this relationship is headed. I work hard and play hard and to be honest keeping up with you is mentally exhausting. I’m not the white picket fence kind of girl and I’m tried of pretending that I am. What I feel for you isn’t love, it’s good old fashioned lust. Why else do you think we spend ninety percent of our time fucking? If you could cut out the ten percent that constitutes our “relationship,” you would be perfect for me. ”

“Is that all you want from me Buffy, a good uncomplicated fuck that won‘t mean a damn thing the next morning?” Spike asked glaring at her dangerously.

“Yeah, pretty much.” She laid the apple down and gave him a smoldering look. “You up for it or should I find someone else a little more my speed.”

“I’ll give it to you pet…I’ll give it to you good.” He pulled off his shirt and shoved her back against the counter. And with nothing even close to tenderness he had shown her earlier, he began to unbutton her shirt. She wanted to fuck, did she…well them he would give the girl exactly what she wanted. When it was over, he was certain that she would take it all back.

She could see he was on the edge of reason and all it would take was a few subtle shoves and he would fall over to the other side. Burying herself away, she braced herself for the greatest performance of her life. She reached out and began to unbutton his pants and when he was freed she shoved him away towards the wall. Pinning him in place with her body, she unbuttoned her jeans and let them fall to the floor. All that remained of her clothes was her bra and panties and instead of taking them off, she pushed her thong aside and anchored herself around his waist. She’d fuck him like a professional, without the slightest bit of attachment. Unable to face the cold, he would leave she knew it…she counted on it to force her to continue this dark deception.

She began to ride him with slow deliberate movements, arching her back so that her breasts would brush past his body with each downward movement. Feeling his muscles tense while he fought her, she smiled down at him smugly. “Is this what you call giving it to me good, lover?”

Incensed, her spun around forcing her back against the wall. Grabbing her ass hard enough to bruise, he rammed into her fully, drawing a harsh moan from her lips. “To rough for you pet?”

“Not rough enough…” She gasped out breathlessly as her body stung from the violent intrusion. To make her lie sound like the truth, she raked her hands down his chest, hard enough to draw blood. “The only kind of love I want Spike, is wild and dangerous. It burns and consumes...”

“Until there's nothing left.” He finished for her. “Love like that doesn't last. I know you feel like I do. You don't have to hide it anymore.” He told her softly, gently running a hand down her face. He didn’t want her like this. He didn’t want to take her in anger and since she had mentioned love, he saw this as his one chance to get them back to where they belonged.

“That’s what living fast is all about…it doesn’t have to last. Nothing lasts forever so consume me while you have the chance…or someone else will.” She admitted truthfully, knowing full well that he would think she was saying something else. “So make me feel alive or get the hell out.”

“I can make you feel.” He told her thrusting into her again, losing himself to the darkness that she called out with her words and he was going to bring her under with him. He was through trying to break through to her and he was tired of begging her for the slightest sliver of affection. Inside he was screaming for her to hear him but he was through being defeated by her. He had hit rock bottom and he could no longer tell the truth from the lies. Each cruel remark she had casually tossed his way had caused a part of himself to died and he had nothing left to give her. Except for the sex she so badly seemed to want over everything he had offered. She had stripped him bare and locked him in the dark and he was going to drive the final nail in the coffin.

Pumping into her furiously at a bruising rhythm he ignored the soft whimpers of pain that escaped from her lips accompanied by every dark moan, slipping from his. He would make her feel alive, he told himself letting his true face erupt from the violence of his dark passion. He would save her so the devil she so badly wanted to court could claim her. It wasn’t suppose to be this way, but she had made her choice and this was his. They both would just have to live with the pain and known that they could have had so much more.

Just before her climax ripped through her, he lowered his face to her neck and began to feed…to consume her just like she had wanted. He could feel her blood escaping from his hungry mouth, warm and sticky sliding down against their flesh like poured honey. He drunk her down, long past the point of being sated, just hoping to fill the emptiness she had left inside him. Her heartbeat pounded in his head, echoing through the caverns of his heart but even the warmth he had stolen from her wasn’t enough to save him from the nothingness he had become. Only she had the power to make him feel alive and up till now it had all been a lie, he thought bitterly tearing his mouth away from her poisoned skin.

He felt betrayed. He knew where she lived now and until she could see through the lies she told herself, what they had would never being the kind of love he wanted. If it was ever love at all, he wondered looking into her emotionless eyes as he pulled out of her, without ever finding his release. “You never loved me did you?”

“That was always your delusion, I just told you what you wanted to hear. Like you said Spike,” she began getting to her feet, not bothering to hide her nakedness. “It sounded like goodbye and that because it was. I wanted you but I won‘t let anyone tie me down with their emotions. I told you I wasn‘t the broken angel in the picture who needed to be saved. I don‘t care about salvation or what comes after, all I care about is myself as I am now.”

“You’re not a fallen angel but you’re broken and just as lost.” He told her reaching down to pull on his jeans. Grabbing his shirt he pulled it over his head and reached over to the counter to where his wallet sat next to his jacket. He pulled out the crisp bills inside and slapped them against his palm. “I told you I wouldn’t sell myself but that’s all you wanted wasn’t it. You wanted me to service you and you know what Buffy, that makes you the whore. You don’t peddle your flesh for the money, you do it because that’s all you know how to do because you’re empty inside. You never had it as good as me. I would have given you everything.” He screamed at her before flinging the bills towards her.

“Spike…” She uttered brokenly, unable to continue the charade any longer. She was dying inside a thousand different ways and it was to much for her to take any longer. She wanted to confess and beg for absolution but the moment her eyes met his she knew that it was to late. He had no love left for her in his heart, she had made him believe the lies and now he could no longer hear the truth. “I’m sorry.” She told him softly, chocking on his bitterness all the while crying tears of pure misery.

“Don‘t you dare feel sorry for me, I feel sorry for you.” He told her coldly, before walking towards the door. “You’re beneath me.”

*** The song lyrics used are “Goodbye to You” by Michelle Branch. They are hers not mine.***



While Buffy prepared herself for her meeting with Living Death, Spike prowled around his apartment restlessly. Everything in his life seemed empty since he had left her hours ago, everything but the bottle of whisky. Which he was trying to empty as quickly as possible, hoping to make the pain stop for even just a moment.

So far it wasn’t working but he was determined to keep trying. He drank glass after glass and when that wasn’t dulling his senses fast enough, he started to drink from the bottle itself. Being a vampire had it’s perks but at the moment he would trade away his long lifespan if it meant he could get falling down drunk like a normal man who had just had his heart broken. It wasn’t like he had anything to live for anyway, he told himself taking another deep pull of the strong yet not strong enough spirits.

When the phone rang beside him, he reached out for it blindly sure that she had come to her bleeding senses. “Buffy?”

“No man it’s Gunn, what’s going on? I’ve been trying to reach you all night.”

He patted his pockets, impatiently searching for his cell phone. Pulling it out, the message button blinked at him impatiently. “Sorry about that, I’ve had a bad day. But thanks for having someone bring my car to her house…I guess I needed it after all.”

“Whatever man,” Gunn said knowing Spike to well to miss the slight slur in his voice. He was betting that the pretty little blonde had something to do with it but he had another woman who needed him right now. “Dru’s nurse has been trying to reach you all day.”

Sobering instantly at the thought of his sister, Spike grasped the phone tightly. “Is she alright?”

“All I know is that she went insane for awhile, claiming that you were being smothered by a green haze. Tara said it went on for about a half hour and then she calmed down again. Dru told her that your angel had made a deal to keep the devil away and that you were safe again. I hope that means something to you because Tara didn’t understand it anymore than I did but she thought it might be important to you. She told you everything in her messages to you but since your not phone friendly, I was drafted to play errand boy. How many times have I told you…”

“Gunn,” Spike interrupted cutting him off suddenly. “Call Hank and the Giles’s, something’s up with Buffy. She kicked me out of her place saying she didn’t love me and now I think Dru’s message had something to do with it.”

Without waiting for an answer, he hung up and played his messages on his cell. After he heard Tara’s he sat down the phone to search for his keys when the next message started to play.

“Spike this is Hank. Giles just called to tell me that Living Death can possess people, trapping the host in some way. He’s trying to translate the rest of the text now but I’ve been trying to reach Buffy and she’s not answering her phone.”

Suddenly everything made perfect sense, he felt like a fool for not seeing it before. It hadn’t been Buffy who had pushed him away, it had been Living Dead, he told himself. Knowing that he had to hurry and that he might already be to late, he raced out the front door just as the next message started to play.

“It’s Hank again, Giles finished the translation. He can only possess the dead and they have no memory of it happening. Stay away from her Spike, you’re dangerous to her now…”

Spike sat in his car, trying to think of where to go. He knew she wasn’t at her home, if she was possessed she wouldn’t be where he had last left her. So where else would she go to “deal with the devil,” like Dru had said, he wondered. In his heart he knew that Buffy would fight against anything trying to take her over and she was smart enough to know that she needed his help. She would come to him but since she didn’t have his address where would she go to find him, he asked himself slamming his hands down on the steering wheel. Only one place popped in to his mind and he was certain that he was right. Ramming the car in gear, he pealed out and headed into the night.
________________________________________________

Buffy walked across the rooftop of the club as the music blaring inside wrapped around her like a soft blanket. As she walked towards what remained of Riley Finn, she listened to the music that would be her swan song.
______________________
Of all the things I’ve believed in,
I just want to get it over with,
Tears form behind my eyes,
But I do not cry,
Counting the days that pass me by.
I’ve been searchin’ deep down in my soul,
Words that I’m hearin’ are starting to get old,
It feels like I’m starting all over again,
The last three years were just pretend,
And I say-

*goodbye to you,
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew,
You were the one I loved,
The one thing that I tried to hold on to.
___________________________

Feeling that the song had said it better than she ever could, she took the knife that Riley handed her without a single word. She looked up at the sky to the stars casting their light down on the world. She made a wish on the first star she saw, for him to find happiness and brought the blade down to her left wrist.

______________________________________

I still get lost in your eyes,
And it seems that I can’t live a day without you,
Closing my eyes,
And you chase my thoughts away,
To a place where I am blinded by the light,
But it’s not right.

*goodbye to you,
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew,
You were the one I loved,
The one thing that I tried to hold on to.
________________________________________


Slowly she drew the blade across her skin, pricking her flesh and bringing blood welling up to the surface. She felt nothing but empty, the physical pain she was inflicting upon herself was nothing to losing him, she thought as the first tear escaped. Willing to give in, broken and defeated she began to send the blade in deeper. Just then the next verse of the song echoed around her.
____________________________________
Hold on to...
And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time,

I want what’s yours and I want what’s mine,
I want you,
but I’m not giving in this time.
__________________________________

As those words reverberated through her mind, the world just stopped and the rest of the song was lost in a wave of silence. She had heard enough and it had reminded her that some things were worth fighting for…they were worth fighting for. Pulling the blade up, all of her feelings came rushing back, the pain fueling her need to fight. Before he could guess her intentions, she kicked him in she knee, knocking him down to the floor. “Sorry but if you want me, I’m not about to make it easy for you.”

He flipped to his feet gracefully and gave her a hard smile. “I must admit that I hoped you would say that.” He backhanded her, knocking he back a full step.

She countered with a right cross and the fight began in earnest. She ducked his blows and took others that were nothing more than a blur to her eyes. For the first time in her life, she had something worth living for and her body responded before she even had time to think. She was fighting on autopilot, surrendering herself to the primal force that’s power flooded her veins. Her world had narrowed down to encompass him alone and she knew even before he fell to the ground, that she had won. She brought the blade he had handed her, down into his chest, twisting it to sever any organs nearby and looked into his eyes. “Still glad I decided to fight?”

“Buffy!” Spike screamed, flying through the door and racing towards her.

Turning to him instinctively, she heard Living Death laugh even as he chocked on his own blood. The icy hand of dread slid down her spine and she turned back to him and knew by the glowing emerald of his eyes…that he had won. Her earlier indecision had doomed her. He was broken and bleeding before her but with Spike being so close he still had just enough power to defeat her.

“I’ll see you soon luv,” He told her, using Spike’s words with Riley’s voice.

She knew by the sound of Spike’s footsteps that she had only seconds to make her choice and she reached a trembling hand out to grab the blade. Clenching it tightly in her hand, slicked already by her own blood she pulled it free and stood up to face Spike. “I love you.”

While he screamed at her to stop, she brought the blade down across her other wrist, cutting through the veins and spilling her blood onto the roof. Staggered by a wave of dizziness from her life draining away with every crimson drop, she sank down to her knees. Sliding the blade across the roof towards Spike, she placed her palm over her heart. “If you don’t kill me, he will take me over. Please don’t let me die for nothing.”

“What are you talking about,” he said wrapping his hand over his wrist to stifle the blood and pulling her into his lap.

Quickly she explained what had been going on and about the deal she had struck. Laying her hand against his cheek, she smiled up at him softly. “I need you to finish what I started.”

“I can’t kill you Buffy…I can‘t lose you.”

She leaned up to press a light kiss against his lips. “You’re my soul mate, my destiny. Not because fate said so but because we said so. I will always be a part of you, in this life and the next. So let me go so I can return to you again. If you don‘t, he will claim me and I will be lost forever.”


“I need more time…there are so many things left to say.”

“I can feel him inside my mind already pulling me…into the darkness. I love you but you have to do this...now before it’s to late.” She began to shake violently as a wave of heat crept across her skin.

The change was happening and time was running out. He could see her fading away into the nothingness and he pressed his lips to hers. “I love you.” Taking the knife, he stared down into her eyes and plunged it into her heart before it could give it’s final shuddering beat.

*** This is the end, let me know what you all think! I hope you enjoyed the story as much as I enjoyed writing it!!****




Hank burst through the doors, just in time to see Spike bring down the blade. He had been expecting this but like always, he had failed his daughter once again.

Pain exploded through his body, eating him alive with guilt and Spike closed his eyes and screamed her name into the night.

Unable to speak he walked over to where Spike was cradling her on his lap. It was easy to see what had happened, the macabre scene before him was self explanatory. Living Death had been destroyed, by both the living and dead just as the prophecy in the Pergamum Codex, Giles had translated had foretold. He knew that this couldn’t be stopped but he knew Spike did not. He knew his daughter would want to know that he was not alone right now. “She was meant to die here, nothing you could do would have changed this. It was in the Codex and everything written there comes to pass.”

“How did you know where to find us?” Spike asked unwilling to believe that she was destined to die.

“This is her place and it is fitting that she died upon the River Styx. She will find out where she belongs, like all of the living and dead before her.”

Spike glared up at him with contempt blazing in his eyes. “She belongs here, with me in this world. If I hadn’t come here, she would still be alive. It wasn’t fate that brought her to this, it was me.”

“You freed her from a life of pain and misery.” Hank said gently, laying a hand on his shoulder. To his surprise he sensed something unexplainable in the vampire. “Before she met you, she never had a single moment’s peace. You could see it in her eyes, she was haunted by her life and now she is finally free. As you are now free.”

“How can you say that to me, I just killed the woman I loved…my soul mate. I murdered her and there is no escaping what I have done.” Angry at himself, his rage boiled over spilling onto to Hank. “She was your daughter and here you are acting like this is nothing to you. You’re never going to die, so don’t talk to me about things you couldn’t possibly understand.” Spike yelled at him.

“I understand death vampire, but unlike mortals I know that it is not the end but a new beginning. I am doomed to wander this plane forever while never being a part of it. I am forced to watch everyone I love go on to a place I can never follow. Hell is not fire and brimstone, hell is being trapped in Purgatory…like she was trapped here. We both know she was never meant to belong in this world and I find comfort in the fact that she has finally found where she was meant to be.”

“How can you be so sure that he hasn’t taken her?” Spike laid his hand over the knife handle. “I’m so afraid to remove the knife for fear that he is waiting inside her and all of it would have been for nothing.”

“Do you believe that she was your soul mate?”

“Yes but I don‘t see what that has to do with his.” Spike said, brushing Buffy’s hair back off of her face.

“Your right, you don’t see. But the question is can you feel? Look inside yourself and you will know that Buffy is free.”

Not sure what he was looking for, Spike closed his eyes, searching for some deeper meaning for all of this loss. Absently, he reached down to take her hand, wanting to be close to her. To his surprise he felt something brush against his insides as delicately as a butterflies wings. For the first time in more than a century, he felt his soul. His heart did not beat, but he felt full of life. Opening his eyes he looked at Hank. “How?”

“You’re her soul mate and when she died your soul returned to you so that she could find you again. I felt it the moment I touched your shoulder. Like I said, death is only a new beginning.” Hank told him gently, hoping that knowledge would bring him some measure of comfort.

It would have, if the image of the portrait hadn’t flashed through his mind and sent him back to that day.

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“She said someday a dark soul would tell me the story of my creation and that our love would either damn me for all eternity or restore my wings.”

Gently he laid her down on the rug settling himself behind her so that her head was cradled in his lap. He brushed his hand down her face, the face exactly like the crying angel in the picture. “Once upon a time, an angel was expelled from heaven and brought into a world she was never meant to exist in. The forces of evil had began to lay claim on this world and the Powers that Be knew she was the only one who was strong enough to protect the innocent. She was their gift to the world, a Champion given at a time when there were very few willing to fight. But there is a balance that must be met and by sending her into this world, it shifted the scales. The First evil demanded the order be restored. Having no choice they allowed a curse to be laid upon the Chosen One.”

“What was the curse?” Buffy asked, softly.
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With her body cradled in his lap exactly like it had been that night, he finally knew what the curse had been…him. He was her curse, a creature of the darkness who had been chosen to steal her soul and damn her to hell. The prophecy Giles had found had known he would come here and he had been the one to right the balance for the First Evil. He was unclean, unholy and he had dared to defile her with his love and it had cost her life. With the dark thoughts spinning through his mind, they all sounded like the complete truth. What else could possibly explain him feeling full of life, while the woman he loved was not, he asked himself bitterly.

His newly restored soul, unable to bear the weight of his sins, spurred him to make amends. A life for a life, he thought reaching over to pull out the blade.

Closing his eyes he brought the knife to his throat and heard Hank draw a staggering breath. Before he could begin to cut he felt a hand cover his. Opening his eyes, intending to tell Hank to shove off, he found himself looking into a pair of soft green eyes, shining full of life and love. “Buffy?” He asked, the knife falling from his trembling fingers.

“I’m dead all of ten minutes and you try to kill yourself?” She teased lightly, brushing her hand down his face. “I can’t leave you alone for a minute.”

Even though he was unable to think rationally, his body knew that it was really her and not some grim impersonation. “You’re dead…the prophecy…the curse..” He said powerless to finish a complete sentence let alone a complete thought.

If she hadn’t been watching the scene from the ether realm, the place in between this world and the next, she wouldn’t have any idea what he was talking about. But since she knew what he had been through, she pressed her lips to his hoping to give him some of her strength. When she pulled away, she took his hand in hers. “The Pergamum Prophecy could be filled by anyone, since it didn’t mention any names but Living Death‘s. Just as long as someone living and someone dead participated, he would be destroyed. But since it was us another Prophecy came into effect. Dru was right, I am the Chosen One.”

“So I was your curse and you’re now dammed because of me.” Spike said trying to pull away from her.

Taking his hand, she laid it over her heart so that he could feel it beating. The killing wound he had inflicted had already closed completely as well as the ones she had done to herself. “The First couldn’t demand my life, since I was innocent so they cursed me. I was never permitted to find a moment or pure happiness like the one I had known before becoming the Chosen One. If I did, I would be taken from this world and sent back to the Powers that Be. When I died, I found that moment because I knew you would be safe.”

“Then how are you back?” Spike asked, feeling like he had missed something.

“She sacrificed herself for you and a selfless act is enough to break any deal with The First, even a curse.” Hank told them, already reaching that conclusion for himself.

“How did you know?” Buffy asked him.

“It was how I lost my godhead. I was sent to kill your mother because it would be her that would bring the Chosen One into this world. She was just a infant but I couldn’t bring myself to strike the killing blow. Her innocence shimmered around her like a golden cloud and I could not fulfill my pledge. As my punishment the First took away my powers and decreed that I would never be able to escape from my failure into death. It was a curse, so that my sin against my patron deity would haunt me for eternity.”

“But I thought you didn’t meet mom until after you were a Fallen One?” Buffy said turning to look at him, confused for the first time. “And why would you try to raise Living Death if you already had your powers?”

“All Hell Gods seek out power and despite the source it was to much to resist.” Hank told her sheepishly. Thinking about his beloved wife, he smiled softly. “But it wasn’t until after you were born that I knew that your mother had been the same girl I had been sent to kill all those years ago. Despite my punishment, I had forgotten my failure as I sought out my new conquests. But when you were born, you looked exactly like her and I understood why I had been permitted to have a child. The Powers knew that I would protect you at all costs, since I had sacrificed so much already. Evil can’t understand love, it’s too pure and innocent for it to comprehend but it is strong enough to break any curse. After your mother died, I knew that the First would want revenge against me but also that it would seek to destroy you.”

Spike got to his feet and pulled her up into his arms. He knew that Hank and Buffy were sealing the breach between them and that he should step away but he couldn’t. He had come so close to losing her, that he was afraid to let go now. When she cuddled against him as if she had read his thoughts, she gave a soft contented sigh. Wrapping his arms around her tightly, he laid his cheek against her head.

“So you sent me away.” Buffy said, finally able to understand her fathers actions. Actions that she had always blamed him for in the past. Until Spike had showed her how to love, she had never understood the man who had been her father. But with her lover holding her close, she could see him clearly for the first time. She was willing to die for Spike tonight and Hank had been willing to suffer for her. Love could be a pleasure or a pain and for her sake he had embraced the pain.

“Much like you chose to return here instead of remaining with the Powers.” Hank said with a slight nod.

“You lost your wings,” Spike said suddenly as the last bit of the story clicked into place. “You had the chance to be where you belonged so if it wasn’t because of the curse why did you come back?”

She turned in his arm so that she could look into his eyes as she offered him her heart. “Because I belong with you. I love you Spike so I don’t need to ascend to find heaven…it’s right here in your arms.”

“Is this what you really want luv?”

“More than anything,” she said tilting her lips up for what she meant to be an innocent kiss.

Spike on the other hand had other ideas.

“I think I will go keeping my eyes closed as I leave.” Hank said awkwardly even though he was glad to see his daughter so happy.

Blushing furiously she pulled away, not really ready to part with her dad again so soon. “Don’t go, we won the big battle and that means it’s time to celebrate! I keep some clothes in my office and after we‘re all drunk and danced out, I’ll buy you all some lunch.”

“I’d like that, but lunch?” Hank asked, delighted that she had asked. “It’s almost dawn and the club closes at six, so don‘t you mean breakfast?”

“The club closes in a hour for regular people but for me the club is always open. If you all are staving you can order in while I change, but trust me, it’s going to take more than an hour for us to celebrate. I mean we made it through some heavy stuff tonight, two prophecies, a curse and hey…I came back from the dead. That alone is worth a few hours of quality party time.”

“No wonder you didn’t want to be an angel pet,” Spike said with a roll of his eyes. “You’re just to good at being a bad girl to be that innocent.”

“It wasn’t that. Can you imagine trying to find an outfit that goes with wings and a halo?” She shot back, not regretting her choice for a second. “I mean you just got a soul and since black goes with anything it’s not really a problem for you. But big silver wings and a gold floaty crown thingie, that’s not such an easy look to pull off.”

While they teased each other all the way over to the club, Hank stood back to watch them. He knew that all actions, even those that were preordained had consequences. The moment she had opened her eyes, he had sensed the change in her. But like Spike, she was to lost in her emotions to realize that she had been altered by the choice she had made. He opened his mouth to tell her, when her laughter rang out in the air. It was filled with an almost childlike glee and since her life was always going to have more tears than cheer, her happiness was to precious and fleeting to spoil now.

What he had to say could wait for another day, he decided walking over to join them.