AN: Hi, I'm not so good at English gram. and my spellingscontrole doesn't really work, my beta doesn't return my stories, or she takes 4 weeks to return it. So I'll already post this chapter and I'm looking for a beta right now. So please excuse me for the faults in this chapter. I'll get to it, but I just really wanted to post the beginning of this story.


Big Kisses,

Spikegirl


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~ Chapter 1: Buffy Summers

A small girl was sitting on a couch in a big mansion, that was build in a cemetery. The girl was always alone, nobody talks to this girl... her name is Buffy Summers.

When Buffy Anne Summers was 11-years-old, her mother died because of brain tumour little Buffy didn’t only lose her mother, but also her best friend. Joyce Summers and her daughter were inseperable. Little Buffy with her blond hair and big green eyes cried for months over the loss of her mother. Because of the sudden death of her mother little Buffy Summers had to live with her father, Hank Summers. But Buffy didn’t want to live with him, and he didn’t want her.. so her father pulled some strings and made sure she didn’t have to live with him. Her father paid her a lot of money to stay away from him each month, so it wasn’t hard to get by... money wise.

Because the house of her and her mother had to be sold, Buffy’s next mission was to found a place to stay in. And she soon found it... a big empty mansion. It was Buffy’s luck that the mansion did have electricity. So Buffy found a new home.

She didn’t have to worry about Social Services, because they were to afraid to come to the ‘haunted’ mansion. Nobody worried about Buffy Summers, the little girl without any parents, they had their own lives to worry about. There was only one man that cared about the little girl... that man was Rupert Giles, Buffy’s old teacher.

Her father did give Buffy a lot of money, but not enough to go to school, so Mr. Giles helped her by coming by every schoolday homeschool her. Mr. Giles stayed for dinner almost every night, he didn’t have anyone to go home to. He liked to stay at Buffy’s... she decorated the mansion really nice, it almost looked like a real house. She even had a guestroom for him, where he could spend the night, which he sometimes did. He didn’t only teach her about science and stuff, but also about cooking and cleaning. Rupert Giles was like a father to Buffy. Buffy always talked to him about her mother and her past... that she didn’t like to tell anyone. Mr. Giles suggested to sing about her feelings, because he heard from a friend that, that could help to face your fears. So Buffy sang about her feelings and to Giles’ amasement she could sing like an angel.

Mr. Giles didn’t tell anyone about helping Buffy, but there were rumours tough, about a wild woman living at the mansion in the cemetery. Nobody actually went to look because everyone believed the mansion was haunted. They didn’t know how the ‘wild woman’ looked like, because Buffy never left the cemetery. She went to see her mother every Friday night, but that was as far as she went. Giles often told her that she should go out more, but Buffy was just to afraid to face the real world. Giles was the only man she trusted, but even if he went with her she wouldn’t step a foot outside the cemetery.
She knew that people might find it strange, but the cemetery became her home in the last 6 years.

Buffy used to have friends, before her mother died. They tried to help her through the pain she was feeling, but they just couldn’t. After a while they just gave up and never spoke to Buffy again. After that they couldn’t even talk to her anymore, they didn’t know where she was... they didn’t know that she lived at the mansion.

“Buffy? Buffy, are you there?” she heard someone call her name. She left her bedroom and walked through the hall into the living room. She smiled when she saw Giles standing there with his arms full with books and on top of that a bag of groceries with he always bought for her.

Because Buffy didn’t like to go out, she gave Giles money and a list to buy her groceries. He also bought her furniture and things like a washing machine and a fridge, but he always made sure the delivery boys didn’t tell anyone about the stuff they delivered in the mansion, but that wasn’t a problem, because Giles had friends in ‘high’ places.

“Hi Giles.” she gave him a kiss on the cheek and helped him put the groceries in the fridge. Buffy was wearing a white skirt and a pink shirt. Buffy also did some of her own shopping, she bought clothes from the internet. Her clothes were delivered at Giles’ and he brought them with him when he came.

“How are you?” Giles asked while he put the books on the coffee table.

“I’m fine, I’ve finished my song yesterday. The one you asked me to make, about my dad?” she asked, looking at him with her green eyes.

“Uhm, yes. Yes, I remember. We’ll talk about that later. I brought a couple of books with me.” He said, pointing at the big pile of books. “I want you to read them, they’re not for ‘school’, but they ARE homework.” He said with a strict look. Buffy was just like any other girl at her 17-year-old age, she HATED homework.

“Okay, what are they about?”

“Problems, mostly. Problems that kids of your age have. From a fight with their parents to pregnancy. Talking about pregnancy, I brought you something.” he walked over to his briefcase and grabbed a small box. He handed it to her.

“Condoms?” Buffy said with a smile. “Giles, you’re the (only) person I have contact with, I don’t need condoms.” She said with a smile, not feeling uncomfortable at all. They had the sex-talk years ago, when she asked him about it. Giles wasn’t that comfortable with the subject, but he explained her all about the birds and the bees.

“I know, it’s just... you never know what happens in the future and I want you to be prepared.” He explained, blushing a little, still not comfortable about the subject of sex.

Buffy’s smile faded. “I appreciate this Giles, but even if I went outside, nobody would want a ‘wild woman’.” She said with a sarcastic voice. She knew about the rumours, Giles told her a while ago. She didn’t understand what their deal was, she was just like any other teenager without any parents, she just didn’t live in a foster home or on the streets. Just because she didn’t come out didn’t mean she was a wild woman. There was nothing wild about her actually, even Giles said she was a quiet person.

“You never know...” was all Giles said. “Well... I suppose we should eat... I brought Chinese.” Knowing that was her favourite food, after McDonalds of course.

“Okay, thanks.” She said with a smile. They used to continue with her schooling, but this Friday it was different, not because it was a special day or what not, they both just didn’t feel like doing anything school related.

They both ate in silence, when they were finished eating and had done the dishes they sat on the couch just talking. Giles asked Buffy about the song she made and she made a promise to sing it for him next time, she didn’t feel like singing tonight.

“Buffy. I wanted to talk to you about next Monday. I.. uhm... can’t come then. I’m expecting company,” Giles explained.

Buffy looked sad. “From who?” she asked, Giles never got company.

“My nephew is moving in with me, my sister can’t handle him. So she sent him to move here. She only asked me yesterday.” He explained with a hopeful look that she wouldn’t be all to sad. He never missed a day, so he didn’t know how she would react.

“Okay. I hope he likes it here. But I’m sure he will... with you being there and all.” She said with a smile. She was sad for a little while, but she knew that having family over was a big thing for Giles so it was a big thing for her.

“Thanks Buffy. I just hope he will adjust.”

“What’s his name?” she asked, making conversation.

“Uhm... William. But he likes to be called... uhm... spoke? No, that isn’t it. Oh, right... Spike. Don’t ask me were he got that name from. He’s a...” He said while looking at Buffy’s confused face.

“A bit of a rebel?” she asked with an amused look. “A bit like you in your Ripper-phase?” she asked him. She knew all about his Ripper days, when he was against everything good in the world. She laughed.

“Well, I just hope he’s not as bad as I was.” He said.

~ Chapter 2: It’s Spike

“I can’t believe this. You’ve been here for like what, 5 minutes? And you’ve already managed to damage something in this town? What were you thinking, wrecking a billboard?” Giles was yelling at his bleached-blond with blue eyes nephew. “I expected more from you William.” He said with a sombre look.

His nephew mumbled something. “What?” Giles asked.

“It’s Spike.” He said with an angry look. “You’d be better to remember it, mate.” He said with a smirk.

‘Oh god he’s worse then me’ Giles thought while looking at his clothes; black jeans, black shirt and of course a matching black leather duster.

“Where are you going?” Giles asked when he saw his nephew walking towards the door.

“Out” he said while slamming the door shut.

Giles looked at the closed door. “I really need a drink.” He said while falling back on the couch.


Spike was walking through the park, just smoking a cigarette and looking at the stars when three guys came walking towards him. They stopped in front of him and looked at him with wide smiles.

“Hi, you must be the new guy right?” the biggest guy with the brown hair asked him. He was wearing white shirt with a black jacket and blue jeans.

“Yeah, what of it?” he answered. ‘God he looks like a big poof and what’s with the hair gel?’

“I’m Angel, we heard there was going to be a new guy. We expected a nerd though.” He said

‘A poof look AND a poof name.’ he thought while smirking. “Why’s that?”

“Because you’re the nephew of a librarian.” He answered. “Anyway, so I’m Angel, this is Parker,” he said pointing at a black-haired boy “and this is Riley.” Pointing at a brown-haired boy that looked like a farmer.

“The name’s Spike.” he said.


“Well, if he isn’t here then I don’t have to be here either.” Giles mumbled to himself. He grabbed his coat after writing his nephew a note and left through the front door.
He didn’t call Buffy on her cell phone that she got from him, he wanted to surprise her.


Angel, Riley, Parker and Spike were just talking and smoking a bit when they suddenly got bored.

“I’m bored” Riley whined while looking at Angel asking him silently to think of something to do.

“What’s the time?” Angel asked him.

“It’s 11 o’clock.”

“Good” Angel said with a smirk. He turned to Spike. “So Spike, ever seen a wild woman before?”










AN: Just a short chapter sorry. But the next one's bigger, I promise :P

~ Chapter 3: Boeh?


“A what?” Spike asked Angel with a confused look on his face. He has only met the guys two hours ago and they didn’t seem bad. They told him they were the most popular guys of the whole school. He wondered what it would be like to be popular. He wan’t exactely popular in England, no he used to be a nerd ‘till his father died. He didn’t care about his grades anymore and skipped school any chance he got. Which his mother obviously didn’t approve of, so she sent hem to his uncle, hoping that he would chance his ways. ‘Crazy bint’ he thought. He would never chance, he likes the way he is now, not the nerd he was.

“There’s a wildwoman in the old mansion at the cemetery. Everyone says she’s crazy and that she doesn’t talk a word of English.” Angel said with a scary look on his face, hoping to scare Spike.

“Aha, and you’ve seen her?” he asked.

“Uhm... no.” Angel answered.

“Well, then how could you know she doesn’t talk English if you’ve never seen her.” He asks.

The other guys look at each other. “Never mind, let’s go. We’ll find out soon enough.” Angel said with a smile.

5 minutes later they arrived at the old, dark mansion.

“Here she’s lives.” Parker says, hoping he didn’t have to go inside. The craziest stories were spread and he didn’t exactely wanted to find out if they were true or not.

Spike looked at his 3 new friends. They were just standing there, not moving an inch. He smirked. “Well, what are you waiting for? Let’s go and find out shall we?” he said almost laughing at the expressions on their faces.

“You want to go in there?” Riley asked.

“Ofcourse, I would like to see this ‘wildwoman.”

Everyone looked at Angel. Angel, who didn’t want to seem like a wimp smiled. “Let’s go and see this bitch. I bet she’s ugly as hell.”

They all walked further to the mansion. They all walked to the windows in the middle. They all stood next to each other, looking in side.
“I think this is the livingroom” Parker said looking inside with a interested look.

“This doesn’t looks like a house where a wildwoman lives, this looks like any ordinary house.” Spike says, not sure if he believed himself. ‘Who would want to live here?’ he asked himself.

“I think...” Angel stopped talking when he saw someone enter the room.

‘Holy shit, someone does live here’ Spike thought.

They all looked as a girl walked to the door, they couldn’t see her face. She was dressed in black. Black skirt, black shirt and to match this black boots.

They still couldn’t see her face and the 4 friends were waiting ‘till she turned around to see how she would look.

“Some say her face is full of scars.” Riley Finn said.

Buffy walked to the kitchen. She went to grab herself some orange juice, but stopped when she heard someone talking

“... full of scar’s” she heard a guy talk.

She smiled and went to the backdoor.

“Where did she go?” Parker Abrams asked his friends. The others shrugged.

All of a sudden they heard a terrifying noise coming from the bushes. The boys turned around, scared for their lives.
Then suddenly someone jumped out of the bushes.

The boys screamed. The person, which they could now see was a girl, just stood there staring at them. They stopped screaming.

“Uh... boeh?” she said.

The 3 boys screamed again, running away. Spike just stood there, still staring at the girl.
He chuckled and walked towards her. He moved his hands to her face and pulled some leafes and branches off of her face that had stick to her skin, making it look like scars.

“What’s your name, luv?” he asked her.

“Bu... Buffy.” she said.

“Pretty name. Mine’s Spike.” He said while kissing the top of her hand. “I’d better go now. It was a pleasure meeting you Buffy.” He said.

Buffy watched him walk away.

“Yeah, a real pleasure.” She mumbled.






AN: This isn't a big chapter, but that's because I had to change some things. Sorry for that.
Thanks for all the reviews guys, I love you!

~ Chapter 4: I’m not okay

The next day, the boys decided to come again, after Spike promised them that she wouldn’t hurt them.
They were looking into the window again when they saw someone enter the living room.

“Giles?” Spike whispered to himself.

They saw the girl hug Giles and they could even hear her talk through the window.

“Giles, what are you doing here? I thought you wouldn’t come today either.” She asked with a smile on her face, thankful that he did show.

“I had some time. My nephew went out with his friends.” He said.

Spike looked at the girl, Buffy. ‘She has the voice of an angel, please turn around love, I want to see your face again.’

As if she could hear him she turned around to sit on the couch. The four boys gasped again. She was absolutely beautiful with her honey blond hair and perfect curves all over. They couldn’t really see her eyes, but they guessed it was a hazel colour.

They all looked at each other.
“She doesn’t look like a wild woman, she looks just like any other girl at our school.” Riley said.
The other boys nodded.

“But what is your uncle doing here Spike?” Parker asked him.

“Yeah, how does he know this girl?” Angel asked.

“I have no idea, but...” he started, but stopped when he heard them talking again.



“It’s hard moving to another place.” Buffy said with a sad look. She remembered she had to leave the house she had with her mother and move into this mansion. But she likes it now.
Buffy decided that she wouldn’t tell him about the boy she’d seen, not yet anyway. She wanted to keep this to herself.

“Uhm... yes, of course it’s hard. He’ll come around. I was wondering if you would like to sing that song you wrote about your father.”

Buffy looked at him with a nervous expression, not sure if she was ready.

“You need to face your fears Buffy, it’s better for you and I need to know what happened between you and your father.” Giles explained.

“Okay, hold on.” She said while nervously stroking her hands through her hair. She walked to the corner and grabbed her guitar. She walked back and sat on the couch again.
“Here goes nothing.” she mumbled.


Once upon a time there was a girl
In her early years she had to learn
How to grow up living in a war that she called home
Never know just where to turn for shelter from the storm
Hurt me to see the pain across my mother's face
Every time my father's fist would put her in her place
Hearing all the yelling I would cry up in my room
Hoping it would be over soon

Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK

All the guys in the house and outside listened to the words that the girl was singing.

I often wonder why I carry all this guilt
When it's you that helped me put up all these walls I've built
Shadows stir at night through a crack in the door
The echo of a broken child screaming "please no more"
Daddy, don't you understand the damage you have done
To you it's just a memory, but for me it still lives on

Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so, so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday

Buffy was crying now, but she didn’t stop singing.

Giles looked at her with pain in his eyes. He didn’t know what to think and he didn’t want to believe the pain she must have had, the pain she still haves (has).

It's not so easy to forget
All the lines you left along her neck
When I was thrown against cold stairs
And every day I'm afraid to come home
In fear of what I might see there

Bruises fade father but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK
I'm OK

Both Buffy and Giles were crying when she stopped and Giles took her in his arms. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry Buffy.” He mumbled, feeling her pain. He didn’t know what happened to her and a part of him wished he still didn’t.

The four friends outside didn’t know what to do, all they could think of was the beautiful girl inside that was still crying. At least, that was what 3 guys were thinking.
The other one was thinking a little differently.

‘It’ll only be a matter of time before I get her in my bed. I’ll break the little girl and turn her into a real slut.’ He thought with a wicked smile on his face.






AN: The song was I’m Ok from Christina Aguilera, which I think is a great and sad song. I would like to thank all the people who reviewed, I luv you guys :P

~ Chapter 5: First day at school

Spike walked to school with a cranky look on his face. He didn’t want to go to school. He hated school as a matter of fact. He used to like it though, but that was when he was William, now he’s Spike, and he hated school.

It’s been exactly a week when he saw the girl. He tried to talk about it with his uncle to find more about the girl, but he didn’t know how to talk about it without telling him that he saw them. He didn’t want his uncle to know that.

He saw the guys every day last week and they talked a lot about the girl. That she was hot and that she could really sing, but they didn’t talk about what they saw when they were at school. If they would talk about it or keep it a secret. They explained to Spike that most people didn’t believe in the girl, that it was just a rumour to scare people. No one ever saw the girl or the mansion. But Spike doesn’t believe that, someone must have seen the girl, because if they didn’t, how could they know a girl lived there?

Spike didn’t exactly like the guys, but they were all he had. He really didn’t like the big poof and often showed him that by calling him Peaches, which pissed him off. But he didn’t do anything about it. ‘Probably scared that I’ll kick his ass’ Spike thought to himself with a smirk.

Well anyway, here he was standing in front of his new school, with absolutely no intention of actually going inside.

“Hi.” he heard, but he didn’t pay attention.

“Excuse me?” he heard the same voice again. He looked behind him and saw a redhead looking at him with big eyes.

“Hi, pet. You needed something?” he asked.

“You must be the new kid right?” she asked him. He nodded. “Great. Hi, I’m Willow Rosenberg. I’m supposed to show you around, give you your schedule. ” She said, smiling.

“Hi Will, I’m Spike.” He said, already liking the girl. They shook hands and walked towards the school. After they had everything and Willow showed him around they went to the library to get him some books.

“Hi, Willow, William.” Giles greeted them with a big smile on his face.

Willow looked at Spike with a weird expression. He gritted his teeth. “How many times do I have to tell you uncle... it’s Spike!” he said angrily.

“Fine, fine.”

After they collected his books they disappeared through the door again.

“Hey Spike, what are you doing man?” Angel asked him looking at Willow with a disgusted look on his face.

“Hanging.” he said.

“Yeah, I see that. But what are you doing with her?” he asked Spike.

“Hanging, she’s cool.” He said. He knew what this was all about, but he liked Willow better then the guys and he was one of the nerds when he was in England, and he wasn’t planning on treating anyone like crap just because they weren’t popular.

“She isn’t cool. She’s a nerd, we make fun of her, that’s what we do. Now, make fun of her and come with us.” Angel said.

“Like hell. Piss of peaches. I would rather make fun of you. I mean, what the deal with the hair? How much hair gel can someone use?” he said with a smirk, noticing that Angel was really pissed of.

He was about to comment when someone came running to them.

“Leave her alone Angel.” He heard.

“Get away faggot, this isn’t about you.” Angel said still looking at Spike with a pissed off look on his face.

“Leave Willow alone.”

Angel turned to him. “Fuck you,” he said, pulling back his fist to ram it in his face. But just when he was about to hit he was stopped by... Spike.

“Don’t do it man, just walk away.” Spike said, looking like he was about to hit him.

Angel saw he was serious and left, followed by Parker and Riley.

“Thanks.” Spike heard the black-haired boy say. “My name is Alexander Harris, but everyone calls me Xander, or faggot.” He says with a smile.

Spike laughs. “I’m Spike, nice to meet you mate.”

Willow grabs a hand of both the boys. “Come on guys, let’s have lunch.”




AN: I wanted a story where Spike and Xander actually got along, even if it’s for a little way :P
I hope you like it

AN: I'm sorry it took so long, it's just my computer is still going wonky. I hope you like the next chapters though. Thanks for the reviews.



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~ Chapter 6: Compromising Situation

Spike wanted to see Buffy again. But first he needed to know more about her. When his uncle left the house to get some groceries Spike went to his study hoping he could find something about the girl.

Giles told Spike at the beginning that his study was private and that he wasn’t allowed to enter it.
Spike smiled, like that would stop him. He opened the door, stepped into the study and closed the door again.
He walked around and saw a big pile of books on the desk. He walk towards it and grabbed the book on top, a book about vampires.
‘Okay, and I thought my mom was delusional.’

He put the book down and grabbed others ‘till he saw a book that looked like a journal. He opened it and began to read.

11/02/2003: Elizabeth Anne Summers, known as Buffy Summers, is a remarkable girl. In spite of the circumstances she had, she’s a bright, young girl with a lot of potential.
Her mother died when she was eleven, and her father didn’t want her so she stayed at the mansion, having no place else to go. I don’t know what happened between Buffy and her father, she doesn’t like to talk about it. But I know she’ll tell me when she’s ready.
The reason she doesn’t leave the mansion is because she’s scared of people, scared of people letting her down.
I asked her to sing about her mother and she must have been a great person, because the song was all about love.
It’s really something that a young girl could take care of herself this way and turn a dark, scary mansion into a home, it’s really comfortable. The house is like any other house in Sunnydale, only bigger. It has electricity, gas and even running water. I buy her food of course, and she can cook better then most teenage girls I know.
A lot of people talk bad about Buffy, known as ‘wild woman’ but they really don’t know her. She’s just like any other girl that I see at work. She’s bright, she likes clothes and chocolate, and loves ice cream. She has a pink stuffed pig, that she calls Mr. Gordo, a present from her mother when she was just seven years old.
I was very surprised when she turned down my offer to live with me. But I understand now, she’s just scared of people. Afraid of their reaction towards her. Afraid of someone leaving her again, just like her mother did. She used to have a lot of friends, but they let her down after her mother died, not wanting anything to do with her, simply because they didn’t know how to react. It was foolish of these children, but they were only 11 years old.
This girl is like a daughter to me and I hope that one day she’ll be comfortable to be around other people again.

Spike turned a couple of pages and saw the date when he was there with Angel, Riley and Parker. He started reading.

01-24-2003: Something very frightening happened today. I asked Buffy to sing about the situation between her and her father and she sang the most shocking song I’ve ever heard. It appears that her father, Hank Summers, used to hit her and her mother. She told me once that her father used to drink a lot, and that he was always working, but I didn’t know he was such a bad father. The things Buffy had to deal with at such a young age is abnormal. Such a things shouldn’t be happening in this world, especially not with children.
I get why she’s afraid now. She always had more trouble dealing with men which I didn’t understand before.
I remember when we saw a movie which involved a girl getting hit by her father. She was quiet during that movie, something that doesn’t happen very often.
I also remember the time when she fell asleep and woke up screaming “Daddy, no!” I thought she had a dream about him leaving her, but now I know differently.
She still doesn’t like to talk about her father, but at least now I know why, at least now I know what happened to her.
And I just hope that I’m a better father-figure for her then her own father.

‘That’s enough for now’ Spike thought to himself. He put the journal down and went downstairs, grabbing his coat before leaving through the front door.

Giles didn’t come over as often as he used to, because of his nephew. Buffy understood, but she was still sad. She missed him, but she also missed Spike. She needed him to come to her, but she didn’t know why. She never reacted to anyone the way she did with him, it took Giles a long time before she really trusted him but with Spike, it went almost naturally.

She was scared of people but sometimes she wished she would meet someone special, a guy she would fall in love with. She wanted to experience love, she loved Giles, but she just wanted to be in love with someone.

Buffy sighed and turned towards the t.v again, her favorite show ‘The O.C.’ was on and she didn’t want to miss it. It was a really great show and Ryan was really hot. Ryan and Marissa were making out and Buffy was thinking what it would feel like, being kissed by a guy, a bleached blond guy.
Before she knew it she had put her hand over her breast and gave her breast a squeeze, thinking about Spike doing the same thing to her. She moaned, it felt wonderful. She never felt anything like it. She pulled of her shirt and bra and continued squeezing her breasts and tugging on her nipples. After a while she pulled of her pants and underwear and curiously ran her finger across her slit, bucking up when she found her clit. She smiled and rubbed it slowly. She pulled her finger back and sucked on it, making it wet and then put her finger right back, dreaming it was Spike licking her there. With her other hand she continued to squeeze her rightbreast. She felt amazing, the feeling was so intense. She decided to try something else, something she had seen in a movie once. She put her hand, the one she had on her breast, and put it inside of her.
“Ohhh” she moaned.
She had no idea something could feel so good.
She continued doing this, moving her fingers faster inside of her ‘till she came, opening her eyes and screaming... at the man in the doorway.

~ Chapter 7: Boy in my room


Buffy was still screaming when Spike was suddenly standing in front of her.

“Luv, stop. Please stop screaming.” He yelled at her. Hoping she would stop screaming.

“Don’t yell at me!”

“Who’s yelling at who here?” he asked, looking at her with a strange expression.

“Sorry.” she mumbled.

“That’s alright.” He said, still looking at her.
Buffy looked at him, he was still looking at her. She was about to ask him what he was staring at when she suddenly remembered she was naked. Naked! In front of a stranger! She stood up and ran out of the room, up to her bedroom. She grabbed some clothes and put them on, but she didn’t return to the living room. She didn’t know what to think. She didn’t know what had gotten into her. She didn’t feel comfortable around other people, but when he came in and even when he yelled at her, she felt like she didn’t have to fear him. There was just something about him. ‘Yeah, he’s gorgeous that’s what’s going on.’ She thought to herself.
She stopped thinking about it when she heard a knock on her door.

“Luv, are you alright?” she heard him ask.

‘Okay, what do I do? Think, think. I can pretend I’m not here.’ She thought.

“I know you’re here, pet.” He said.

“Damn.” She mumbled.

“Can I come in?” he asked her through the door.

“NO!” she yelled. Her mother always told her that she couldn’t have boys up in her room, what was he thinking? Didn’t he know that a girl wasn’t aloud to have a boy in her room? “I’ll uhm... I’m coming.” She mumbled.

Spike misunderstood her and walked through the door.

“Ahhh!” she screamed. “I told you, I’m coming.” She yelled. ‘I have a boy in my room, I have a boy in my room. Okay, calm down Buffy, it’s going to be okay. Breath... breath.’
“I’m sorry, I thought you said; come in.” He said, apologizing.

“Okay uhm... fine, let’s go. We’ll go to the living room.” She said motioning him to follow her. She walked in front of him, which gave him a perfect view of her ass.

They both sat on the couch, as far from each other as possible, which wasn’t the intention of Spike.

“I like the name Elizabeth. I’m Giles’s nephew by the way,” He said, trying to break the ice.

“Giles told you about me?” she asked with a shocked face. Giles promised her that he wouldn’t tell anyone about her.

“No, I uhm... kinda read his journal.” He confessed.

“Oh” she said.

“Yeah oh.”

“So, what are you doing here?” Buffy asked him, not liking the quiet when she wanted answers. “And how did you come in?”

“I just wanted to see you. And I came in with a key that I stole from my uncle” he explained her.

“Aha.” She said, stunned from the answer he gave her. ‘So he’s a bad boy.’
“What’s life like in England?” she asked him.

They just sat there talking for hours. They talked about everything. Buffy hadn’t laughed as much as she did with him for a long time. Buffy asked him to keep her a secret, and he promised not to tell anyone. Then Spike had to go back, but they decided that he’d come back in two days so they could talk some more and have dinner together. When Spike left Buffy couldn’t help but feel sad that he wasn’t with her. “What’s happening to me?” she asked herself.




AN: two short chapters, I hope you liked it.

~ Chapter 8: First kiss

Chapter 8: First kiss

“Hi Giles, how are you?” Buffy asked him when he entered the room.

“I’m fine dear, how are you?”

“Good, peachy even.” She said with a big smile.

“You’re very happy today.”

“Yeah, uhm... about that.” She said, knowing that she could never lie to Giles. “I met someone a couple of days ago, he came here and we just started talking and we became friends... sort of.” She explained to him.

“You’ve met someone? What happened, who is it?” he asked, confused that she let anyone close to her.

“It’s Spike... uhm William, your nephew.” She said, looking down at her feet hoping that he wouldn’t be mad.

“William? You talked to William?” he asked, too calm for Buffy’s liking.

“Yeah, he came here and we just started talking about a lot of things. He’s really nice Giles. He’ll be here tonight after dinner.” She said.

“And you just talked?”

“Uh huh, it was really nice to talk someone of my age.” She explained. “And don’t be mad at William, I asked him not to tell you about us.”

“I see, okay. That’s great, you’re really going forward.” He said, partly proud of her and partly afraid for her.

“It’s going to be fine Giles, don’t worry.” She said, knowing exactly what he was thinking.

Giles and Buffy talked some more about Spike and how his presence would affect her, but Buffy assured him nothing would change, that she just found a new friend. After a while Giles left, not knowing that his nephew was just leaving his house to go see Buffy.

Buffy was freaking out. Spike was going to be here in like 5 minutes and she didn’t know what to do. She was going to have a boy over, a boy that she had feelings for, feelings she didn’t understand. She was scared, but also excited to experience this new feeling.

Buffy walked towards the door when she heard 2 soft knocks on it. She opened it and it revealed Spike standing there with a nervous smile on his face.

“Hi, pet. How are you?” He asked.

“I’m fine thanks, you?” she asked him, nervously.

“Fine.” He said. They both didn’t know what to do, both to nervous to say something. “Oh, I brought some movies that we could watch. Uhm... I have Troy, Sharktale and A Cinderella Story, I thought you might like them.” He said, not wanting to give her the idea that he was into girly movies.

“Thanks, that was really nice of you.” She said with a smile. “You want to see Troy first?” she asked him. When he nodded she moved to put the video into the VCR. She grabbed some chips from the kitchen and joined him on the couch, sitting next to him, closely next to him.

They were watching the movie, sometimes talking about the characters in it. They were only watching the movie with half their mind, the other half was thinking about the other. They couldn’t help noticing how close they were sitting next to each other and how good and natural it felt.
When the movie was finished Spike noticed that Buffy had fell asleep during the movie. He smiled and put his arm around her so her head was against his shoulder. He kissed her forehead, not knowing that Buffy was actually awake. She opened her eyes and looked up at him smiling.

“Hi.” Spike said. Buffy was about to answer him when he leaned in. When his lips met hers she moaned. ‘God it feels good’ they both thought. Buffy moaned again when he entered her mouth with his tongue. He put his hand behind her head, moving her closer to him. They both pulled away after a while, looking at each other with smiles on their faces. After a while Buffy went to put Sharktale on and when she sat back on the couch she sat on Spike’s lap, with his arms around her.
After Sharktale Spike had to go, so he kissed her goodbye and promised to come back as soon as possible.

“Bye.” He whispered.

Buffy put her arms around him and kissed him passionately again. “Bye” she whispered. She was watching him walk away, closing the door when she couldn’t see him anymore.

~ Chapter 9: Bronze

“You should totally come to The Bronze tonight Spike.” Willow told him.

“The what?” he asked, not knowing what Willow was talking about.

“The Bronze, it’s the coolest club in town. Okay, the only club in town but it’s pretty cool.” Xander explained.

“Uhm... I don’t know...”Spike started, but after he saw Willow’s face silently begging to come he said “...Sure, why not.”

“Cool, We’ll see you there.” Willow told him. She and Xander stood up, said goodbye to Spike and left for their way home.

While Spike and Giles were having dinner, Spike was thinking about the perfect way to ask him to go to the Bronze. Giles once told him that The Bronze was a bad place for kids to go and hang out. His thoughts were broking when Giles started talking.

“Buffy told me that you two talked.” He said, shocking Spike.

“She did?” he asked him.

“Yes, she told me yesterday when I came to visit.” He explained.

“Oh, she said that she didn’t want to tell you yet.” He said, not wanting Giles to think he didn’t say anything to piss him off.

“I want you to know that Buffy has been through a lot and that she doesn’t need more problems in her life. It’s pretty bad enough.”

“I know that Giles. I’m not going to cause any trouble.” He said.

“Okay, I’m going to trust you on that. Just please be gentle with her, she hasn’t talked to anyone except me for a couple of years. She couldn’t handle getting hurt again.”

“I won’t, I promise.” Spike said. He would never even think of hurting her.

When Spike arrived at the club he immediately spotted Willow who wasn’t hard to miss because of her red hair and the fact that she was jumping up and down, waving at him. He smiled, Willow was a pretty cool girl.
He walked over to the table where Xander, Willow and a guy he didn’t know were sitting at.

“Hello.” he said, while taking a seat next to Xander.

“Hi, Spike. This is Oz, my boyfriend.” She said, smiling.

“Nice to meet you, mate.” He said, not knowing what he should think of the brown-haired guy.

Oz nodded. Spike raised an eyebrow. “Oz doesn’t say much.”

“Okay...” Spike said. ‘Weird.’ He thought to himself.

“Oz is in a band that’s called ‘Dingoes ate my baby’.” Willow told him, trying to get a conversation going.

“What do you play?” Spike asked him.

“Guitar.” Oz said.

“I used to play the guitar to when I was in a band in good old England. I sang a little to.” He told him.

Oz smiled and they started talking about their bands. Willow smiled, she really wanted them to like each other.
Spike smiled, he knew this were his friends.

He didn’t notice someone staring at him.

“Who is that salty goodness?” a girl asked her best friend.

“Don’t you know him, that Spike. He’s new, he’s been here for like a week. He ditched Angel and his gang for those losers.” Harmony said, pointing at Willow, Xander and Oz.

“Why would he do that?” Cordelia asked her.

“Don’t know, he must be an idiot.” She told her.

“I need to have him.”

“What? I thought you were totally in love with Angel?” Harmony asked her best friend with a confused look.

“Hello? Have you seen this guy? Angel’s nothing compared to him. I mean, look at him. Have you ever seen a guy like him, he must be great in bed.” She said with a wicked smile. “Don’t tell me you wouldn’t do him in a second.”

“As a matter of fact, no I wouldn’t. I’m perfectly happy with my Jessie thank you.” She said smiling at her boyfriend.

“Thanks sweetheart.” Jessie said, moving in to kiss her a long kiss.

“Uhg, you people are just sick to look at.” Cordelia said watching them with a digusted look.

Harmony and Jessie broke away. “Look Cordy, why don’t you just ask him to dance if you like him.” She said, hoping her friend would go away. She couldn’t believe she was once like her. She used to be terrible to other people, she didn’t care about anyone at all, only about her popularity, but that all changed when Jessie came into her life. He made her see the important things about life, like love and happiness, he didn’t care about money and popularity. Harmony couldn’t believe how lucky she was to have him. He was absolutely perfect, and she wouldn’t do anything that would make her lose him. Okay, she did notice that the new guy was pretty hot, but her Jessie was always number one on her list. He was pretty smart to, he tutored her because she wasn’t doing good at school, but that’s all better now.
She smiled and watched her boyfriend drinking a coke, laughing with his friends Gunn and Forrest. He was smart and good looking with his brown hair and his beautiful brown eyes.
Everyone called her a slut, but the truth is, she hasn’t slept with anyone yet. She wanted her first time to be special, not like Cordelia somewhere in the back of the car. She wanted a bed, with candles surrounding it and the perfect boyfriend, she wanted Jessie to be her first.

“Hello, earth to Harmony.” She heard Cordelia shout.

“What?” she asked her.

“I’m going to ask him to dance alright.” She said.

“Yeah, alright. You go get him.” She said with a smile. She knew Cordelia just wanted to use him, but she didn’t know the guy, maybe he just perfect for her friend. But then why would he ditch Angel and his gang for Xander and his?

Cordelia stood up and walked towards Spike’s table.

“Oh oh, be aware. Queen Bitch is coming.” Xander said with a low voice. When Cordelia reached the table he put up a big smile. “Hi, what are you doing here o holy one?” he asked her.

“Shut up geek, or was that freak now?” she said with a smile, loving to torture him.

“I don’t know, was it slut or whore? Oh wait, it was both.” He said with a mean glare.

“Whatever.” She said, rolling her eyes. She turned to Spike who was watching their interaction with an amused look. “Hi, I’m Cordelia Chase.” She said.

“I’m Spike Giles.” He said, not knowing if he really wanted to know her.

“So what are you doing?” She asked.

“Uhm... sitting here with my friends.” He said. ‘Is she blind or something?’

“Ugh, right. Why don’t you just come dance with me and leave these losers alone.” She said, convinced that he would leave them for her. ‘I mean, come on. They all do!’

“No thanks, these ‘losers’ happen to be my friends, and I would rather be friends with these so-called losers, then dance with a bitch like you.” He said, clearly pissed of at her for insulting his friends.

“Are you choosing them over me? Are you an idiot or something?” she asked him, thinking it had to be a joke or something.

“Apparently I am.”

“Ugh, you just like them, a big fat LOSER.” She shouted, then turning away to walk to her table again.

“What happened?” Harmony asked when she saw her friend come back to their table.

“He choose THEM over ME! How could he. I’ll get him for this.” She said.

“Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be Cordy. Maybe he likes someone else.” She said, trying to calm her friend.

“I don’t care, he’s publicly humiliated me. I’m not going to leave it at that, you’ll just wait and see.” She said, glaring at the back of Spike’s head.

AN: I know that the chapters haven't been long, but I'm going to change that, I promise!

~ Spikegirl

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~ Chapter 10: Exposed

Buffy was lying on her bed, thinking about... big surprise; Spike. She just couldn’t get over how gorgeous he was, with his bleached blond hair, perfect cheekbones and the deepest blue eyes. He was like an angel. He was a guy, a guy she didn’t know very well and the weird thing was, she felt perfectly comfortable with him, like she has known him for years. She knew it sounded cheesy, but that’s exactly what she felt with him. She couldn’t believe he saw her naked, doing.. stuff to herself. It was the first time she actually touched herself there and it was even worse because the reason why she did it was Spike. He was making her do things she wouldn’t even dream of before. He was making her heart beat faster then she could ever imagine.
If she could only know what he was thinking, so she could know if he felt that way to.

“Hey captain peroxide.” Xander said, taking a seat next to his new friend under the tree outside the school. When he didn’t answer he waved in front of his face. “Hellllooo, anybody home?”

“Sod off, Harris.” he said.

“I guess someone woke up at the wrong side of the bed.” Xander joked. “What were you thinking about, man. It looked like you were on another planet.”

“I was just thinking about...” he said, not knowing if he should lie about it or not. “... about a girl.”

“Jeez man, you’ve only been here for what, a week now? You sure move fast.” He said, looking as if he was the biggest player in the world.

“It’s not like that, she’s special.”

“They’re always special, man. But what’s her name, do I know her?” he asked him.

“Nah, you don’t know her.” He said, hoping his friend would drop it.

“Come on, you can tell me. You’re not ashamed of her are you?” he asked, not planning on dropping the subject before he knew all the details.

“You really don’t know her, she’s not in this school.”

“Well, invite her over to the Bronze.”

“I can’t do that Xand, she doesn’t like big crowds. She might freak out, things could get wild.” He explained.

“What? What’s that all about? What is she... a wild woman or something?” he asked. He looked over at Spike, looking at the expression on his face. “No shit, you’ve met her?”
Spike nodded. “How does she look?”

“Beautiful.” He said, not knowing an other word to describe his golden goddess.

“Wow. Uhm... is she really wild? I mean, did she attack you or something, what clothes did she wear?” He asked, wanting to know all about this so-called wild woman.

“She didn’t attack me or anything, she’s just like any other girl. And she wears...” he thought back at when he saw her naked, pleasuring herself. God he could get a hard-on just thinking about it. “... normal clothes.”

“Can I meet her? I want to see her. What’s her name?”

“No, I shouldn’t even have told you this. I promised not to tell anyone about her. I promised. And her name’s Buffy”

“Don’t worry man, I won’t tell a soul I promise.”

“Thanks man, I owe you one.” He said smiling at his friend. They started talking about Buffy. Little did they know that someone was listening, a certain someone who has a big mouth and needed something good to get back at him.



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AN: Thanks to much to all the people that reviewed, you guys are amazing!

~ Spikegirl

AN: okay, the second chapter today. Two short ones sorry, I was actually going for one big chapter, but I didn't think it fit.

~ Spikegirl

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~ Chapter 11: Perfect

Spike and Buffy were sitting on the couch making out. It started with watching a movie, but whenever they were close they always ended up making out.
Buffy moaned when his hand came in contact with her breast. He gave it a little squeeze, just testing how she would react, he wouldn’t want to do anything that she wasn’t ready for.
She moaned again and moved her hand down at the buldge in his pants. She smiled when she felt his erection straining against his pants. She knew what a penis looked like for the tv, but she also knew that it could be different in real life.
She put her hand over the bulge in his pants and gave it a squeeze which caused Spike to moan and kiss her harder, wanting to taste all of her.
Buffy pulled back and pulled of her shirt, then his, wanting to feel his naked flesh against hers. She was completely naked above the waist because she wasn’t wearing a bra. She suddenly felt self conscious when Spike kept staring at her.

“Beautiful.” he mumbled before crashing his lips against hers.

Buffy smiled, that’s exactly what she felt when he looked at her; beautiful.

Spike moved to so she was under him on the couch. He broke away from her mouth and started to kiss her neck, trailing down to her breasts, kissing and sucking on the nipples.

“Uggghhh” she moaned, it felt so good, he could make her feel so good.

She moved her hands down and starting to unzip his pants, Spike stopped sucking on her nipples. He looked at her.

“Are you sure, luv?” he asked her. He wanted her so much, but he could wait, he could wait forever if he had to.

“I’m sure.” She said before kissing him again.

Spike picked her up and carried her to her bedroom, before dropping her on her soft bed. He pulled of his pants and then hers, standing again to look at her. She really was his golden godess.
He pulled of her thong and opened her thighs. He smiled at her, he could feel she was dropping wet.
He leaned in and gave a small kiss on her pussy lips. When he heard her moan he smiled again.
He opened her lips and gave a lick from bottom to top, loving the taste of her.
He started licking and sucking her pussy, avoiding her clit first but then he soflty started sucking on it. Which caused Buffy to grabbed the hair on his head, wanting to keep him there forever. When he knew she was about to come he gave a little bite on her clit, she came screaming. He kissed his way back again, making sure he marked every little spot on her body.

“That was wonderful.” She said with a smile before kissing him.

Spike looked into her eyes and she nodded. He moved to her nightstand and grabbed the condoms she got from Giles, she told him all about it and put it on.
He guided his cock into her pussy and when the head was in, he gave a little kiss on her nose, before moving all the way in, up to the hilt.
Buffy almost screamed of pain, she knew it would hurt, she didn’t knew it would hurt this much.
Spike hadn’t moved an inch, he was raining kisses all over her face. She smiled, even if she was in pain, he always knew a way of making her feel better.
When Spike knew she was relaxed he started moving, causing them both to moan.
“Perfect.” He whispered in her ear.
He started with slow strokes, but when Buffy grabbed his butt he started to trust faster and deeper. Buffy could feel she was almost coming. Spike pinched her clit. “I love you.” He said.
That did it for Buffy, she came screaming his name. After a few trust Spike came to, spilling himself in the condom.
He moved out of her, after getting rid of the condom he stepped back in with Buffy, holding her close to him.

“I love you to.” She said with a smile. “And thank you, that was... perfect.”

Spike smiled. “Yes, it was.” He said before falling in a deep slumber with Buffy.





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AN: thanks to everyone that reviewd, I love you guys!

~ Spikegirl

AN:I'm really sorry that I didn't update this in a LONG time, my stupid computer broke down and I couldn't get on the internet.
thanks for all the reviews, I really appreciate them. Please keep them coming!

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~ Chapter 12: Fight

Spike was already awake for a couple of minutes when Buffy woke up. She opened her eyes and smiled when she saw Spike who was staring at her with a dreamy smile on his face.

“Hello sleepyhead.” He said with a smile, not believing she was still beautiful with bedhair. ‘Everything about her is so beautiful’ he thought to himself. ‘I’m so lucky to have her.’

“Hi, did you sleep well?” she asked him, not knowing what she was suppose to do or say. She’d never slept with anyone before. She was afraid that she would do something wrong.

“Perfect.” He said. He saw that she was scared so he gave her a little kiss on her nose to assure her that everything was okay. “What about you? Did you sleep well?”

“Perfect.” She answered him, lying her head back at his shoulder.

“What time is it?” she asked him after a while.

“It’s half past ten, I really should get home.” He said, not wanting to leave her, but knowing he had to.

“Why? You don’t have school today right? It’s Saturday.” She said.

“No, I don’t have school. It’s just Giles is going to freak when he realises I’m not home.” He told her, he really didn’t feel like having a fight with Giles. He really liked him, even though he didn’t always show it. Giles really cared about him and that was something that didn’t happen very often. He knew he was trouble when he was in England, but he really wanted to change. Especially now when he founded his angel.

“Alright. When do I see you again?” she asked him.

“I don’t know. If I don’t get grounded I’ll see you tonight alright sweetheart?” he said, not thinking he could take it if he didn’t see her tonight.

“Okay.” She said before kissing him passionately.

“I’ll see you tonight.” He promised before pulling on his clothes, kissing her one last time before dissapearing out of the frontdoor.

“Yeah, tonight.” She said with a smile, thinking about all the things they could do tonight.
Spike walked into the livingroom, hoping that his uncle wouldn’t see him.

“Hello William.” He heard from behind him. ‘Buuusted.’ Spike thougth with a grim on his face. He turned around with an innocent smile.

“Hello uncle Rupes.” He said.

“Don’t worry, Buffy already called me to say that you two fell alseep during the movies. I’m still a little mad, but that’s because I was worried, but you won’t be grounded.” He said. “Please don’t forget to call next time so I don’t have to worry alright? You’re still seventeen and even though this is a small town a lot of bad things can happen to innocent, young people here.”

“Yeah, thanks Rupes. I promise I’ll call next to time. You’re the best” He said with a smile and sat down at the kitchen table. Giles grabbed them both a cup of coffee and they both drank in silence, enjoying the silence. When Spike finished he put his cup in the dishwasher.

“I’ll be upstairs.” He said before walking upstairs towards his room.

He walked into his room, which was decorated in dark shades and had a big bed right in the middle covered with red satin sheets, and fell on his bed. “God that girl is perfect.” He said to himself, falling asleep with a big smile on his face.

Buffy was just about to pour herself some orange juice when she heard a knock on her door. ‘Weird’ she thought, because she didn’t expect anyone. She was secretly hoping it was Spike.
She went to the door and opened it revealing... a guy she didn’t know.

“Hi” she heard the guy say.

“Hi.” She said, not knowing what else to say.

“I’m Xander, Spike’s friend.” He explained, hoping he didn’t scare the girl.

“Oh, hi.” She said, becoming angrier by the second.

“I know I’m not suposse to come by or anything, it’s just, I have nowhere else to go.” He said. Only then Buffy saw the bruises on the guy’s, Xander’s, face.

“Oh, come in.” She said, stepping aside so he could enter.

“I wasn’t sure if you would even talk to me. I couldn’t go to Spike’s because mr. Giles would ask to many questions and Willow, that’s another friend of my, is away for the weekend with her boyfriend.” He explained. “And Spike talks about you a lot so I thought of you.”
“What happened, if I may ask.” She said, knowing what it was like wanting to talk to someone but not knowing how.

“Uhm.. My dad and I. We don’t get along so well. Well actually alcohol and my dad don’t get along so well.” He said with a smile. Buffy went to the kitchen and grabbed some ice.

“Here.” She said. “It will stopp the swelling.”

“Did you go to the police?” she asked him.

“No! I mean, it’s my dad. I can’t do that. He might be a jerk, but I can’t do that to him. Even if I didn’t care about him, I wouldn’t know what would happen to me if I did. And I want to finish highschool here.” He explained.

“I know what you mean.” She said. When he looked at her funny she tried to explain. “My dad used to hit me when I was little. He had a problem with alcohol too and he kind of took it out on me and my mom. I didn’t tell anyone, but sometimes I regret that I didn’t. Maybe if I did it would’ve stopped earlier.” She didn’t know why she was telling him this, she didn’t tell jsut anyone about her past, but something in inside of her told her that she needed to tell him.

“How did it stop?” he asked, desperately wanting to know the answer.

“He left us, my mom and me, for another woman. After my mom died I couldn’t go back to my father, first of all, he didn’t want me and seconded I really didn’t want to go back to that bastard.” She explained, actually feeling happy that she could talk to someone about it.

“That sucks.” He said.

“Yeah well, that’s life.”

“Don’t you ever get lonely here?” he asked her. Not understanding how she could live all alone in a big house.

“Sometimes, but this is my home now. I wouldn’t want it any other way, maybe when I’m older. But not right now. I’m not ready to leave yet.”

Xander smiled.
They both didn’t know what to say for a while.

“What do you say about pizza?” She asked Xander with a smile hoping that will give them something to pass the time with. The answer she got was a big smile from him.
A half an hour later they were sitting on the couch eating pizza and watching a movie.

“So, you and Spike. You’re pretty close right?”

“You can say that.” She said with a smile, thinking about the other night. But then she remembered that he lied to her and the smile dissapeared.

“You know, if you need a way to take out your anger and frustation, you can try singing, it always helps with me.” She said.

“Thanks.” Xander said with a smile. “But I’m not really a good singer, I’m bad... really bad.”

Buffy smiled.

“I’ll try something else that’ll work for me.” He promised her. “I’ll be okay.” He said, not knowing himself if he was telling her the truth. ‘I hope I’ll be okay.’

When the pizza was gone and the movie was finished Xander stood up to leave.

“You can stay here if you want, you know.” She said, liking Xander and not wanting him to leave if that meant that he’ll be getting into trouble.

“Thanks, but I should really head home. Thanks for everything though, it was great just talking to someone. Knowing that I’m not alone in this.” He said.

“You’re welcome, and whenever you need anything, I’ll be here okay.”

“Okay, thanks again.” He said before giving her a small hug and dissapearing through the front door.

“Bye” she said waving to him. She closed the door when he was out of sight.

She knew Spike was coming in a little while and she didn’t know what to do. She knew she was mad at him, really mad, but she never had these kind of feelings for anyone.

When she heard a knock on the front door she slowly walked towards it. She opened it and saw Spike with a big smile on his face, but the face dissapeared when he saw that Buffy wasn’t happy.

“What’s wrong, luv?” he asked letting himself in.

“Who else know about me? I mean, actually know me, know I excist?” She asked him.

“Uhm... let’s see, me, Giles, Riley, Parker and Angel You know the guys that you saw the first time we met?” He said forgetting that he talked to Xander about her. “Why?.” He asked, not knowing what she was talking about.

“You know that’s really funny, because I’ve just talked to a Xander for about 2 and a half hours.” She said hurt that he didn’t tell her the truth. “How can you just stand there and lie about it?”

“Xander? Oh god, luv I’m so sorry. I wasn’t thinking when I told him about you. I just really needed someone to talk and he... why was he here anyway?” he asked.

“He needed a friend.” She said, not satisfied with his answer. “I’m really angry with you Spike. A couple of weeks ago nobody actually knew about me, only Giles and suddenly you come along and there are like 5 people who know about me and they’ll tell their friends and they will tell theirs. Sooner or later this whole town will know, and then what? It won’t be pretty. Social services will send me back to my father and then I’m right back where I started.” She said, terrified that she had to leave Sunnydale to go live with that jerk of a father.

“You won’t have to go to your father, luv. I won’t let that happen, you know that... Wait, why didn’t Xander come to me?” he asked with a confused expression.

“He wanted to keep his problems a secret, so he couldn’t exactely come to you now could he?” she said.

“Look, I’m really sorry luv. I just, I needed to talk to a friend about you. I needed to know that I wasn’t living a dream, that you and I were real.”

“Then why didn’t you just come to me? If you’re having second thoughts about us don’t you think I have the right to know?” She said.

“I know, I’m sorry. But I wasn’t having second thoughts I promise, I would never doubt anything that was between us, it’s just... I’m just confused. It’s all moving so damn fast and I don’t even care. I love you more then anything and I don’t care about anything else when I’m with you. Who I’m a kidding? I don’t even care about anything when I’m without you, I just have to think about you and all clear thoughts wash away. I’m really sorry. Please forgive me. I don’t know what to do without you. I need you.” He said, taking her hands in his and placing a kiss on the top.

“You know I can’t stay mad at you. You and your manly charmes. And I need you to, I need you right now.” She said with a sexy smile before leaping into his arms and kissing him passionately. After a couple of minutes kissing, which seemed like hours, they started undressing each other and fell on the couch together. They were so engrossed into each other that they didn’t notice that they were being watched by 2 people who weren’t found about the new couple. Two people who decided to work together so they could get what they wanted from them.




Thanks to: Cordykitten, BuffyAndSpikeForever, Sarah g, Bint, Caitie, Kat, Seraiza, Allison and Spike_Love. You guys are great!

AN: God I was so stupid. I posted an AN as chapter 13, so I added chatper 14 as a new chapter, I forget all about chapter 13. I hope the next chapter will make more sense. Sorry guys :S



~ Chapter 13: Lies

Buffy was sitting at her kitchentable eating pasta and thinking about Spike. She was always thinking about Spike. ‘He’s so sweet and caring. And gorgeous!’ she thought to herself with a huge smile on her face.
She wouldn’t see Spike for a couple of days because he had big exams coming, she hated it but she also wanted him to pass the tests.
They talked about college last time he was with her and Spike promised her that he would go to college in Sunnydale, he couldn’t stay away from her. Buffy had kissed him, which had lead to a very passionate lovemaking.
Buffy didn’t know what she would do without Spike. Her life was so empty without him, she didn’t want to go back to that place in her life.

Buffy was just finished eating when she heard a knock on the door. She smiled, she always liked company. She would really like if it was Spike who was knocking, but she would also like if it was Giles or Xander.

She walked to the door and opened it with a smile, but the smiled dissapeared when she saw a girl standing there with tears running down her face.

“Please, can I come in?” she asked, while already stepping into Buffy’s livingroom.

“Sure.” Buffy mumbled, while looking at the strange brown-haired girl who was still crying. “Are you okay? What happened?” Buffy asked her.

“I’m Cordelia, but my friends call me Cordy. You’re Buffy right?” she asked her with an innocent look.

“Uh, yeah. But...” Buffy started with a confused expression.

“Spike. You’re all he talks about.” She said.

“Really?” Buffy asked with a smile.

“Yes, he’s SUCH an asshole. I came here to warn you. He shouldn’t be trusted.” She warned Buffy.

“What are you talking about?” she asked, not getting what the girl in front of her was talking about.

“He’s a real player. He sleeps with every girl he wants. His motto is ‘use them and lose them’. He and his friends have these ways to make a girl sleep with them. And then they humiliate them. And... he did it to me to. He humiliated me in front of the whole school!” She said, fake crying again.

She looked at Buffy and smiled when she saw the look on her face, a look of full horror.

“A...a..are you sure?” she asked.

Cordelia nodded. “Yes, he even said that you were his next victim. He said he was really going to humiliate you.” She said.

Buffy had trouble to keep her tears in check. She just couldn’t believe it. ‘You should’ve known Buffy, everyone you ever loved has betrayed you. And it happened again.’ She thougth to herself.

“Oh my god, is that the time?” she said, faking her shock. “I really should go. I hope you won’t make the same mistake as I did.” She lied. “Ciao.” She said, giving her a little wave before dissapearing trough the frontdoor.

When Cordelia was standing outside, she grabbed her cellphone and dialed a number. “Mission accomplised.” She said with a smile before hanging up.

When Cordelia was finally gone, Buffy let the tears fall. She walked over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of scotch, which she bought for Giles if he ever felt like drinking it. She opened the bottle and drank.

AN: For you who've already read this chapter, you should take a look at chapter 13. You see, I had posted an Authors note at chapter 13, so I posted chapter 14 today, forgetting that I didn't post chapter 13 yet. Did that make sense? Well anyway, I hope it will clear some things up a lil bit.

A BIG thanks to NEO, if it wasn't for you I wouldn't even noticed it. THANK YOU!!


AN: I'm SO sorry that i haven't updated this in a while. I'm still looking for a beta. I had a beta for like 2 weeks, but she stopped because of personal reasons. So i'm still looking. If you know a good beta, or if you are a beta, please let me know.

Spikegirl

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~ Chapter 14: There’s no more messing around

Spike was lying on his bed, studying for his exams when suddenly his phone rang. ‘Bloody hell’ he thought to himself.
He picked up the phone with a angry voice.

“What?” he asked.

“Well hello mister sunshine.” He heard Xander.

“What’s up, Whelp. This better be good.” He said, not liking that he was disturbed while he was studying.

“Oh it’s good my man... for me. We need to go to the Bronze” he said.

“And why do we need to go to the Bronze?” he asked, not knowing why they had to go, especially at a time like this. He was studying really hard, something that didn’t happen very often.

“Well, here’s the thing. I met a girl at the Bronze yesterday, a beautiful girl I may add. And she asked me to come to the Bronze again today and I need you with me.” Xander said, really hoping that his friend would go with him.

“I don’t know whelp, I’ve got stuff to do...” he started, really wanting to help him, but also really wanting to study.

“Please”

Spike sight. “Alright, but if I get a F, it’s totally your fault, mate.” He said. His uncle would kill him if he’d fail. But more imporantly, he would also kill himself. If he didn’t make it, he would have to be in highschool for another year and he really didn’t want that. He wanted a future with Buffy, not a future that only consisted of highschool hell.

“Cool, thanks buddy, I owe you one. I’ll be at your house in a half an hour.” He said, before quickly hanging up the phone, not wanting to hear his best friend yelling at him.

“Half an hour!?” Spike yelled through the phone. “Couldn’t you have told me sooner. Xander?” he said when he didn’t hear a reply. “Xander? Oh bloody hell.” He said, hanging up the phone.



Buffy was walking on the streets, with a bottle of scotch in her hand. “I didn’t know being drunk could be this good!” she exclaimed. “What a pretty lights.” she said smiling at herself. She walked over to the ‘pretty lights’.
“The Bronze.” She read to herself. She smiled and walked in. She saw all kinds of people, but it didn’t scare her. Alcohol had that effect on her. She smiled at the music they played and walked further into the club.

“Hi.” She said at the guy who was watching her.

He walked towards her. “Hi beautiful.” He said, looking at her leather skirt and blue top, which almost didn’t cover anything. “What’s a girl like you doing in a place like this?”

“Oh my god, lame. Here’s a tip buddy, use a better pick-up line.” She said, patting the guy on his shoulder before walking over to the bar.
The bartender looked at her. She put the empty bottle on the bar. “It’s empty, I need more... uhm...” She said, looking at the name on his shirt. “Bert?”

“Yeah, doesn’t really suit me right?” he said.

Buffy shook her head. “Drinks please.”

“Are you sure? Maybe it would be better if I gave you some coffee or something.” He said, hoping that the strange girl would take his advice.

But Buffy wouldn’t have it. She grabbed some money out of her jacket and put it in front of the bartender. “I’ve got the money, you’ve got the booze. Gimme.” She said, giving the man an innocent smile.

Bert sighed. “Alright, but don’t tell me I didn’t warn you.” He said.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.” She said, turning around, looking at the stage. “Who’s playing?” she asked at the nice bartender.

“Everyone who wants to sing something.”

“Cool” she said before grabbing her drink and paying Bert. “Bye, and thanks for the drink.” She said, giving the bartender a fake kiss.

He smiled. “The guy that left her must be a moron.”

Buffy went to sit in the corner at the Bronze, a dark place where no one could see her. ‘Everyone who wants to sing something.’ She kept hearing.

“I feel like singing tonight.” She said before standing up and walking towards the stage.

She didn’t notice that the reason she was drinking tonight just entered the club.


“I can’t believe you dragged me here.” Spike mumbled to his friend.

“Well, how could I know that Anya would bring Cordelia with her? All Anya said was to bring a friend.” Xander explained to his seriously pissed off friend.

Spike sighed. “I know. Let’s get this over with alright?”

Xander nodded. They went to a table. A guy went over to them. “Is this seat taken?” he asked, pointing at the fourth chair. Spike was about to answer him when Cordelia interupted him. “No, take it.” She said.

“Thanks”

“Why did you do that Cordy? Now one of us has to stand.” Anya asked her ‘friend’ while all of them took a seat, except Cordelia. She didn’t really like Cordelia, but she begged to come with her so she took her with her.

“Oh that’s alright, I’ll just have to sit on Spike’s lap.” She said, sitting on his lap before he could protest.

He was about to knock her off when he saw his best friend’s look, that screamed: ‘Please don’t ruin this for me!’

Spike sighed. They were talking when they heard the guy announce a new singer.

“Ladies and gentleman. Here’s our new star of the night, Buffy!” he yelled.

Spike and Xander both looked at the stage. Spike eyes went wide with shock when he saw his girlfriend standing there.

“What the hell is she doing here?” Xander asked him.

Spike didn’t answer him, to shocked to speak. When Buffy looked at him he smiled, but that turned into a frown when she gave him an angry look. ‘What the hell is going on?”

He looked at Cordelia. ‘Oh shit, this can’t be good.’ He said to himself. He gave Cordelia a little push, but she wouldn’t move.

“Cordelia, could you please move?” he asked her.

“Why? I’m comfortable.” She said, giving Buffy a wicked smile before throwing her arms around him.

“Hi, my name is Buffy, and I’ll be singing Party up.” She said through the microphone.

She put the cd into the cdplayer and hit play. The music started of slowly and she took a deep breath. ‘Here it goes.’ She thought to herself. ‘Tell him what you think of him now.’

You... are driving me out of my mind
Cause you... take me everywhere but out at night
What more do you need for me to get with you

She started singing, looking directly into Spike’s eyes, trying to forget that the queen of bitches was sitting on his lap, and that he wasn’t doing anything about it. ‘Well what did you expect Buffy?’

I didn’t see this coming,
Why don’t you start me up?
There’s no more messing around

This could be the start of something
Why don’t you party up
Time for you to come on down

She had trouble keeping the tears at bay, she really didn’t want to be messed around with anymore. She should’ve known, letting people in would only bring her more pain.

I... dream about it in my sleep
You... seem to like me better when I creep
This time I won’t lose

I didn’t see this coming,
Why don’t you start me up?
There’s no more messing around

This could be the start of someting
Why don’t you party up?
Time for you to come on down

She could see in his eyes that he knew she was singing about him. But she could also see the hurt and confusement in his eyes. ‘He hasn’t even figured it out yet. There’ll be no more messing around Spike.’ She thought to herself.

You roll me, you use me, you love me and then
You wrap me up and reel me in and use me again
You love me, you hate me, you say it’s the end
I know your gonna do it again and again

I didn’t see this coming,
Why don’t you start me up?
There’s no more messing around

This could be the start of someting
Why don’t you party up?
Time for you to come on down

I didn’t see this coming,
Why don’t you start me up?
There’s no more messing around

This could be the start of someting
Why don’t you party up?
Time for you to come on down

“There’s no more messing around.” She said through the microphone again, looking at Spike with tears in her eyes. She gave the microphone at the host and ran out of the Bronze, with almost every eye in the room on her.

Spike watched her run away. He needed to know what the hell was going on. He pushed Cordelia off of him and ran after her as fast as he could.



AN: The song was called Party up; Hilary Duff. I really like this song and thought it would be good for this story. Please let me know what you think of the story.

And I want to thank EVERYONE for reviewing. You guys are so great! Please keep them going and if you have any ideas for this story, please let me know.

I love you guys!

~ Spikegirl

AN: Heej guys! I've FINALLY got a beta; Allison. She's really great and you should read her stories. They're posted on this site to, so take a look alright.
Thank you Allison, you're the best!
And thanks to all the people that reviewed, you guys are really great, I don't know what I'd do without you :D
Please keep them coming and I hope you'll enjoy this chapter.



Chapter 15: Mission Completed

Spike ran out of the Bronze. He looked around but couldn’t see Buffy anymore. He sighed and began running again towards Buffy’s house.

Buffy was running as fast as she could, not really feeling well.



‘Stupid scotch,’ she thought. ‘Stupid Spike.’ Tears were rolling down her face. She couldn’t stop crying- life was hell.


She kept thinking about Spike- he seemed so nice. She even gave up her virginity for him. She should’ve known better- men couldn’t be trusted. Every man she’d ever known let her down. Well, exept Giles, but maybe he would let her down soon, too. Spike after all was his nephew, and family comes first. That’s what Giles always said- he called her his family- but Spike’s his real family. She didn’t know what to think anymore. How could her life get this screwed up when it was pretty screwed up before this mess?


She didn’t know what hurt more- the fact that he slept with a lot of girls when he was with her, or the fact that Cordelia was sitting on his lap and he didn’t even try to hide it. It’s like he wanted to hurt her. ‘But if he wanted to hurt me, why did he look so sad? No Buffy, don’t go there. He’s no good. Forget him,’ she tried to convince herself, but she knew she would never forget him.

She saw the mansion and ran to her door, opening it and falling down on the couch. “This couch is of the good. People don’t appreciate a good couch anymore,” she babbled with closed eyes. She screamed when she felt a hand clamp down on her shoulder.

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!” She turned around, kicking at her offender, and looked at...

“Spike?”

“Bloody hell, woman! What did you do that for?” he asked, rubbing over his leg where he knew was going to be a bruise later.

“You deserved it,” she mumbled.

“Look, Buffy, I’m confused. What’s going on?” he asked, looking at her, who was giving him an evil glare.





Xander, Anya and Cordelia were still sitting at the table.

“Well, that was rude,” Cordelia said. “That girl must have some issues, poor Buffy.”
“What?” she asked when she saw Xander looking at her funny.

“How do you know her name is Buffy?” he asked, knowing that she had something to do with this whole fiasco.

“Well, you know, from around,” she tried.

“You did this, didn’t you? You know why she was mad?” he asked her.

“Xander, what's going on?” Anya asked him, not understanding why they were arguing.

“I think your friend here is trying to break up my friend’s relationship,” he said, still looking at Cordelia.

“Oh, she isn’t my friend,” Anya said with a smile.

Xander turned to her. “What?”

“Yeah, I actually only met her yesterday. She wanted to join our date because she knew your friend and wanted to get to know him better. I thought she was your friend- I really don’t like her," she said, looking at Cordelia.

“See, this is why I like you,” he said, smiling at Anya, loving the idea that some other girl besides Willow hated Cordelia.

Cordelia was still stitting at the table, drinking her diet Pepsi.

Xander looked at her with a disgusted look. “Now, Cordelia, you’re gonna tell me exactly what you did,” he said.

“Why would I do that?” she asked, clearly not impressed by his glare.

“Because otherwise, I’ll tell all of your little friends that you went out with us,” he said.

Cordelia looked at him with wide eyes. “You wouldn’t! That would ruin my whole reputation!” she exclaimed.

“Yep.” He smiled.





“You KNOW what’s going on,” she said, trying not to look at his face.

“No, I don’t,” he replied, lifting her chin so she would look at him. “Tell me. Why are you mad at me? Did I do something wrong? That song you were singing, was that how you feel?”

“'Do something wrong'? Hell yes, you did something wrong! How can you do this? How can you stand here, acting as if you don’t know?” she yelled.

“Because I really don’t know,” he shot back.

“I know what you did,” she said with tears in her eyes. “I know what you did.”

“What? What I did? What did I do?” he asked, not understanding what she was getting at. He took a step towards her, wiping her tears away with his tumb.

“Don’t touch me!” she yelled, taking a couple of steps back. She looked at Spike through the tears, noticing the hurt look on his face.

“What? I don’t understand, luv- talk to me.”

“Love? Am I your love? Do you LOVE me?” she asked with a hint of sarcasm.

“You know I do.”

“I don’t know anything right now. You say that you love me, you say that I’m the only one you want. How can I be the only one you want when you’re fucking other girls, telling them you love them?”

“What? What the hell are you talking about? How can you think that?” he asked, not getting how she could come up with such an idea.

“I know everything, Spike. I know about your little plan with your friends and how you use girls for your own pleasure and then dump them when you’re done with them.”

“Buffy, baby. Who told you this?” he asked her.

“C-Cor-delia,” she said, looking into his eyes.

“Cordelia? That bitch, I’m gonna kill her,” he said, pausing before looking at Buffy. “Baby, look at me.”

Buffy didn’t look up, instead continuing to stare at her feet.

“Please look at me, baby,” he begged her.

Finally, she looked at his face. “Look into my eyes." He smiled when she looked directly at him. “I didn’t do that- I love you more then anything. I would never even think about being with someone else. Please, you have to believe me. Cordelia wanted to date me, but I didn’t want her- I want you. You’re the only one I want,” he said, looking into her eyes.

“Then what about tonight?” she asked. He looked at her with a confused expression. “She was sitting on your lap,” she explained.

“Xander was having a date with this bird named Anya, and Cordelia wanted to come like a double-date or something. I didn’t know anything about it till she showed up. Xander asked me to come with him because he was afraid to be alone. He really likes Anya. This guy took our chair and Cordelia sat on my lap. I wanted to push her off of me, really I did. But Xander looked at me, and I didn’t want to ruin his date, so I didn’t do anything.”

She looked at him, still crying.

“Please believe me, luv. Please.”

“I-I believe you,” she said, really believing him. She could see in his eyes that he was telling her the truth.

Spike sighed in relief and happiness. He stepped towards her and tried to kiss her, but Buffy stepped back again.

Spike looked at her, confused. “I thought...” he started.

“I really do believe you, it’s just... I’m sorry, this isn’t gonna work,” she told him.

“Why not?” he asked, getting tears in his eyes, also.

She looked at him. She loved him so much, but she didn’t want to get hurt. “I just don’t love you,” she lied.

Spike looked at her. She gasped when she saw the tears rolling down his face. He stepped towards her. “I don’t believe you," he replied.

Buffy looked down. “I’m sorry,” she said before running up the stairs into her room, locking the door.

Spike looked at the stairs, crying his heart out. “This isn’t over!” he yelled before turning and walking out of the mansion, crying the whole way home.





AN: Don't hate me :P Do you really think I would end this story without make-up sex? Puhlease... :P
Please tell me what you thought of this chapter.

AN: special thanks to Allison for betaing this chapter and to gypsy_jin, for giving me a lot of reviews :P

~ Spikegirl

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Chapter 16: Needing the Answers

“What is going on, William?” Giles asked when Spike got in the house, tears
rolling down his face. He was just reading a very good book, but he was
interrupted with the sound of the front door slamming and the sobs that were
coming from Spike.

“Buffy,” he whispered before looking at his uncle. “That bloody bitch!” he shouted, trying to make his anger go away. He couldn’t believe the nerve that Cordelia had.

‘Destroying peoples lifes- what the hell was she thinking? I’m going to make her pay- I promise I will,’ he thought to himself.

“Now, William, I know that you’re mad, but you can’t call Buffy a bitch. She
is a very nice young wo...” Giles started with an angry look, dissapointed
that Spike could say such a thing about the girl that he thought of as a
daughter.

“I’m not talking about Buffy, you git. I’m talking about that bitch
Cordelia,” he said with an expression of ‘duh’ on his face.

”Oh well, yeah, she is a bitch,” Giles mumbled to himself. He met Cordelia a
couple of years ago when she first entered Sunnydale High and immediately
didn’t like her. She didn’t appreciate a good book and was very rude to
other people.

“Did you and Buffy get into a fight?” Giles asked.

Spike looked at him. “No, Giles, I’m crying my heart out for nothing!” he
yelled.

“Sorry. Do you want to talk about it?” Giles asked him while Spike grabbed
something to drink.

“No, I just want to go to my bedroom and find a way to get my girl back,” he
said with confidence.

“Very good. Just remember, William, you can’t always get what you want,”
Giles warned him.

Spike looked at him. “I know that, but I will get my girl back.”




Spike had just entered the room when his phone rang. He smiled, hoping it
was Buffy.

“Hello?” Spike answered.

“Hey, man, it’s me,” Spike heard through the phone. He sighed- he should’ve
known that Buffy wouldn’t have called him.

“Hi, what’s up, Whelp?” Spike asked, not in the mood to talk with his friend.
He really liked Xander, but the timing of the boy just sucked.

“I just wanted to say that Cordelia said something to Buffy about a bet. She
told us all about it. Something that you use women and then lo..” he
started.

“Yeah, I know- Buffy told me.”

“Oh thank god. You guys are okay, then? I was afraid that you would get into
trouble with Buffy,” Xander replied.

Spike sighed, forcing the tears to stop. “It did,” he mumbled.

“What?” Xander asked, not hearing what his friend just said.

“I said that I did get into trouble with Buffy. We broke up.”

“What? Why? I mean, Buffy knows the truth, right?” Xander panicked, not
believing that his two friends weren’t together anymore.

“Yeah, she knows the truth, and she says she believes me. I think she’s just
scared.”

“Scared of what?” Xander asked.

“I don’t know, but that’s what I gotta find out.”

After saying goodbye, Spike hung up the phone and went back down. He saw his
uncle reading a book on the couch and walked over to him.

“Uhm, Giles?” Giles looked at his nephew and saw tears in his eyes.

“What is it, William?” Giles asked, looking at Spike with concern in his eyes.


“I...I need some help.”


“With what?” Giles asked, not sure what Spike was asking him. He knew it
had something to do with Buffy and he wasn’t sure if he could help his nephew.

“I need to know more about Buffy, things that have happened in her past. She
was too scared to tell me about it, but I need to know. Please,” Spike
begged his uncle. “I need to fix this.”

“William, I would really like to help you, but the things Buffy told me are private. She trusted me to share her secrets, and I can’t betray her trust. You must understand that, William.”

“I do, Giles, I do. But I love her so damn much, and I know she loves me
back. She’s just scared of something, and I need to know what it is that
she’s scared of,” Spike told him, looking at his uncle with pleading eyes.

“You’re just as bad as your father was,” Giles told him. “I’m not supposed to
tell you this... but okay. When I first started to connect with Buffy, I made
these tapes with our voices on them. They’re upstairs in the attic in a
big box that says ‘Buffy’- you can’t miss it,” Giles said. He expected a big
‘thank you’, but all he got was a Spike running towards the attic. “You’re
welcome,” he mumbled to himself.

“Now, maybe I can make a little visit to a certain someone...”



Buffy was still lying in her bed when she heard a knock on her bedroom door.
She put her head under the blankets, not wanting to deal with Spike right
now. She knew if she’d look into his eyes, she would kiss him and beg him to
take her back. But she couldn’t do that. She couldn’t stand being hurt
again.

She was so deep in thought that she didn’t notice that the person that
knocked on her door had already come in.

Buffy heard a cough. “What is it, Giles?” she asked from under the blankets.

“How did you know it was me?” he asked.

Buffy pulled her head out from under the blankets and saw Giles looking at her
with a confused frown. “You’re the only one I know that has a cough that’s
annoying,” she said with a smile, which Giles returned.

“I guess you heard the news, huh?” Buffy asked.

Giles nodded. “He still loves you, you know.”

“I know- I still love him, too, but that doesn’t change anything.”

“Can I ask what went wrong?” Giles asked her.

“Sure, ask all you want,” she said, not really in the mood to talk about it.
Giles looked at her with a glare, and she sighed. “I wasn’t...” she started.

“Yes?”

“I wasn’t scared,” she said, looking at him with tears in her eyes. When she
saw his confused look, she started to explain. “He made me feel at home. I
was comfortable with people that I didn’t even know and I wasn’t scared
anymore.”

“And that’s what made you afraid?” he asked, and Buffy nodded. Giles wrapped his arms around her. “Don’t you get it, you silly girl? This is good- it means that you’re starting to heal.”

“Good? This isn’t good. The last time that I felt at home, something bad
happened! Every time something feels good, it gets taken away from me. I
don’t want to be in that kind of pain again. I love William, I love him more
than anything. But I’m afraid...”

“Afraid that he will be taken away from you,” Giles said with understanding.

“I’m afraid that he’ll leave me. Like everyone else that I cared about. I
can’t give him anything. What do I have to offer him?”

“You,” Giles answered.

“And what if that isn’t enough for him?” she asked him with a look that
could only be described as terrified.

“Then he really is a fool.”




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Thanks to: Caitie, Carri, blondiebear, Forever Luv, BuffyandSpikeForever, Seraiza, Bint, Allison and Gypsy_jin for reviewing!
You guys are great, please keep the reviews coming!

AN: alright people, here's another chappy!
thanks to Allison for betaing this chapter and making me feel good about my work ;) Luv you!

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Chapter 17: Digging up the past

Spike was sitting on his bed, looking at the box that held all the answers next to him. He knew that it would explain a lot about Buffy, but he didn’t know if he wanted to know all about her past.

‘But if I do, maybe I can help her. She’s not alone in this- I just need her to see that,’ he thought to himself. And with that said, he grabbed the box and opened it.

Inside the box was a smaller box, so he opened it and saw a couple of tapes. ‘This is it, mate.’

He grabbed a tape and walked towards his CD player. He put the tape into the recorder and sat back down on his bed before grabbing the remote and pushing the play-button.

He turned up the sound until he heard his uncle talking.

”So, Buffy. Tell me what you did today,” he heard his uncle say.

“Nothing really, Giles. I just did some homework, cleaned a little bit, and wrote some stuff in my diary like you said,” Buffy told Giles on the tape.

“What did you write?”

Buffy gave him the diary, hoping that she wouldn’t have to tell the story. She knew she could trust Giles, and she also knew that talking about it made her feel better. But she hated to dig up the past. She wanted to move on, not look back.

Giles shook his head. “No, Buffy, I want you to tell me. Please tell me?” Giles asked her. Buffy looked at him with her big, sad eyes. “You can also read it to me if that would be better.”

Spike heard Buffy sigh.

“Alright. Uhm... Dear diary,
I know it’s been a while, but Giles told me that it was better for me to write about what happened. I think I should start from the beginning then.

It all happened when I first went to my new school in L.A. I made a lot of news friends there. My best friends were Carrie, Eliza, and Jack. We did everything together; shopping, homework, talk about boys. Well, me and the girls talked about boys. I remember my first real boyfriend. His name was Ford, and I really loved him, and he loved me, too. I thought that we were going to live happily ever after. But that only happens in fairy tales. The thing is, he did what every other man has done to me- he left, in one way or another. I remember, it was on a Thursday, somewhere in the afternoon. We were walking home, and he told me that he had to pick up some stuff from a friend. I asked him if I should go with him, but he kissed me and told me that I would see him that night. We planned a little movie night, just the two of us. At his house, of course- my father would’ve never let him in the house. He didn’t like Ford at all- he said that he was a piece of shit and that we were perfect for each other.

Back to Ford. After he kissed me and told me to go home, I walked towards my house, away from him. I heard him yelling something, so I turned around. I was standing across the street, looking at him. He yelled at me that he loved me, and I smiled, yelling back that I loved him, too. I thought he was standing too far away, and something told me that I should bring him with me and keep him safe, but I dismissed the thought, thinking that I was just missing him. But that turned out wrong...

A car came by and the windows were open. Before I knew it, my boyfriend was lying on the ground, blood all around him. I can’t even remember the gunshots. Everything happened so fast.
I ran to him and kneeled next to him. I remember looking at him, crying so hard that I almost couldn’t see him anymore.”

Spike could hear Buffy crying, and it broke his heart. A part of him was jealous of the guy, but his heart was breaking for his girl.

“I looked at him and told him that he shouldn’t be scared, that everything was going to be alright. And he smiled, saying that he wasn’t scared, that he was with me, and that was all he wanted. He brought my hand to his lips and kissed it, saying he loved me before he closed his eyes. I wanted him to be safe, so I laid down next to him, his arms around me. The ambulance and cops found us this way. Some neighbor must have called them- I didn’t know. They had to use 4 men to get me away from Ford- I didn’t want him to be without me. I didn’t want him to be scared.

The police brought me home, and my mom and I sat on my bed and cried all night long.

Four weeks later, my mom and dad divorced. It all went so fast for me- I wasn’t even paying attention to anyone anymore. I could only think of Ford, his face when he said that he wasn’t scared.

My friends and I brought flowers to Ford’s grave every Friday, and we would talk to him, crying together.

Then three weeks later, we moved to Sunnydale. And when we lived there for three months, I heard that Ford’s death was a mistake. They thought he was someone else, some gangmember.
The murderers were killed a couple of weeks later, I think by some other gang, and I cried for that. I was crying tears of joy because the murderers of my boyfriend got what they deserved... Does that make me bad? Being happy that someone is dead? Sometimes I think so, but then sometimes, I think I was being happy that justice was served.”

Spike heard the click of the tape, indicating that that was it. His eyes were red from crying. He didn’t understand everything now, but he understood more. And that was enough, for now...




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AN: thanks to Bint, Carri, Allison, Caitie, BuffyandSpikeForever, Gypsi_jin, Phoenix and Seraiza for reviewing, you guys make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside ;)

Don't forget to review for this chapter!

~ Spikegirl

AN: Heej guys =) I found out yesterday that I'm a favorite author of someone: Spike_Love, so I'm really happy :D

xxx

~ Spikegirl



Chapter 18: Losing Him

Buffy sat on her bed hours later after Giles had left, thinking about all the things that he had said. They had talked a lot, and Giles had told her a lot of stuff about Spike’s past. About his father, who died in a car accident. Giles said that Spike and his father were very close. She thought of her mother- they were like best friends. They shared everything together. Something that she always loved about her. Her mother got pregnant when she was nineteen, which was pretty young, but her mother never blamed her for an early pregnancy. She always said that she loved her more than anything and that she wouldn’t change what happened for the whole world.

She stood up and walked towards her clothes. She put on some new clothes and went downstairs before grabbing her coat and disappearing through the door.

After a short walk, she was finally there. She kneeled down.

“Hi, mom,” she said to her mother’s gravestone, looking at it. ‘Joyce Summers,’ it said. ‘Loving mom and devoted friend. May she rest in peace.’

She really was a loving mom. She had so much love, and she made sure that Buffy got a lot of it. Buffy sometimes wondered if the love that her mother had was so much because her father didn’t have any. When Buffy and her mother had moved to Sunnydale, Buffy had asked her mother why she ever married her dad. She remembered her mother’s face when she told her about her father.

“Your father wasn’t always like that, honey. We were in love once, and your father was the best boyfriend that anyone could wish for. We were very poor but so in love. I thought that money didn’t matter. But your father didn’t share my feelings about money. He thought that he was supposed to be rich, that he couldn’t be a man without the wealth. So he decided to work harder so he could make a lot of money, and he did. But there was a price- his soul. He worked overtime every night, saying that he did it to make sure we were taken care of. But he didn’t do it for that- he did it for the name it gave him, to be popular, wealthy, and perfect. And I wasn’t perfect, so your father found a new woman to spend time with,” her mother had told her with a sad expression on her face.

“His secretary?” Buffy had asked her.

“Yes.”

“But why didn’t you leave him when you found out about that? And after what he did to you, to me?” Buffy had asked her with tears forming in her eyes.

Her mother had put her arms around her. “Because I still loved him after I found out that he had another woman. And I was hoping that he would change, even after he started hitting me. But when I saw him laying a hand on you, I knew that I had to take you out of there. And I did. And I’m happy now, being here with my little girl,” her mother had smiled.

Her father had beaten her a lot longer than her mother had seen, but she never told her, afraid of what her father would do to her or her mother.

So here she was, sitting in front of her mother’s grave. She started talking again.

“So, my life is pretty bad right now,” Buffy said to the grave. “You’ve seen Spike, right? He’s pretty hot, huh, Mom?” She giggled a little. “And he’s so nice, gentle, and caring. He’s perfect. I’m just so scared that he’ll turn out to be like any other man. Afraid that he’ll hurt me. I don’t think he would ever hit me or hurt me intentionally, but it would hurt a lot if he left me. I don’t think I could deal with that. I hurt so much when Ford died- I loved him so much. But the love that I felt for Ford is nothing compared to the love that I feel for Spike. So if he would leave me... I would die.
I love him so much, Mommy, and I don’t want to lose him.” Buffy said, crying with her head buried in her hands.

She tensed when she felt arms around her. She looked up and saw Spike holding her, tears in his eyes. She hugged him as both cried. After a couple of minutes, which seemed like hours, Buffy finally stopped and pulled back, looking at him.

“You heard?” she asked him with a tiny voice.

“Yeah, I heard it all,” He answered, hoping that she wouldn’t be mad at him for eavesdropping. He didn’t follow her or anything- he was just walking towards her house when he heard her talking. Then he saw her sitting in front of a grave, talking to it, talking to her mother, and his heart ached for her.

He gave her a little kiss on the nose. “You are NEVER going to lose me, do you hear me? Never!” he said, looking straight into her eyes, wanting her to believe him.

“I’m just scared,” she said.

“I know, but I am, too.”

Buffy looked at him with a confused look on her face. “Do you think that I’m not scared? Buffy, I’m terrified of losing you, but I need you. I need you with me.”

Buffy grabbed him and kissed him hard, but passionately. They both moaned at the contact, needing each other now more than anything. When they pulled back, they were both breathing heavily.

“Let’s get back to my place,” Buffy said. Spike looked her in the eyes, looking for some sort of sign that she wasn’t sure. When all he saw was love and lust, he lifted her up and carried her towards her house. Buffy giggled and put her arms around his neck. “I want you,” she whispered, which only caused Spike to walk even faster towards her house.

When they were finally in her home, they made their way up to her bedroom. Spike practically threw her on the bed, taking his clothes off before laying on top of her. He smiled at her and kissed her on the lips, moving towards her neck. He nibbled on her neck, which caused Buffy to moan. He pulled back.

“God, you’re perfect,” he said before he put his hand on a breast and giving it a light squeeze, causing Buffy to moan again. “Yes, baby, moan for me,” Spike whispered into her ear, licking it.

Buffy pushed his hand away from her breast and pulled her shirt off, along with her bra. Then she pulled off her pants and panties. Spike looked at her with a smile, and she shrugged. “I just needed to feel your skin against mine,” she said with a smile.

“Oh baby, you’re gonna feel a lot more skin,” he said with one of his typical Spike smirks that made her weak in the knees. He put his lips around a nipple and sucked it hard into his mouth.

“Ugh... Spike!”

Spike went down her body, moving towards her cunt, which Spike once called ‘The most perfect little pussy that God has ever created’. Spike was almost there when he felt a tug on his hair, so he looked at Buffy, who shook her head.

“No foreplay- we can do foreplay later. I just need you inside of me, please. Can’t wait- I need you,” she whimpered.

Spike smiled. “Alright, kitten.”

He gave her a quick kiss on the lips before thrusting inside of her, which made Buffy scream. Spike stopped. “Does it still hurt?” he asked with a look full of concern.

Buffy smiled. “No, you’re just so big. You have the most perfect cock that God has ever created,” she said with a smirk of her own.

“God, baby, I love you,” Spike said before he started thrusting into her heat again.

‘I’m home,’ he thought. ’I’m finally home.’

Buffy kissed him hard on the lips. “I love you,” she said, moaning softly. “Oh God, don’t stop, baby. Never stop.”

“I won’t stop- I could never stop. I could do this all night... making love to you... pounding into your sweet pussy. Do you feel me, baby? Do you feel me inside of you?”

“I feel you, Spike. God, I feel you,” Buffy moaned, running her fingernails across his back, leaving her mark.

They were moving together, building up the speed. Buffy hooked her legs under his ass. “Faster, baby, I need you too much.”

Spike wasn’t one to refuse a lady’s wish, especially not his lady, so he speed up his thrusts, practically ramming into her now.

“God, Buffy, you’re so fucking tight... take it, baby, take all of me... hot, bloody hell... I love you... Love your sweet pussy, love all of you,” he said, wrapping his lips around one sweet nipple before sucking it into his mouth.

“Ugh, Spike,” Buffy moaned. “I need to...baby, I need...”

“I know what you need,” Spike whispered in her ear, moving his hands down. “Spike will give you what you need.” He pinched her clit, causing her to scream, moving her body even harder against him, clamping her muscles around his cock.

“Fuck, Buffy!” Spike yelled out, thrusting once more before spilling himself in her heat.

They laid there for a little while, Spike on top of Buffy, before Spike rolled over, taking Buffy with him so that she was on top.

“That was perfect,” Buffy said with a smile, looking at him with a satisfied look.

“You made it perfect, luv,” he said before kissing her on her forehead. Buffy yawned, trying to hide it from Spike- she didn’t want this night to be over yet. “Go to sleep, Buffy. I’ll be here in the morning,” he assured her.

“What about Giles?”

“He knows I’m here,” he told her.

Buffy laid her head back on his chest. “Goodnight, my love.”

“Goodnight, Spike. I love you,” Buffy said before closing her eyes and slowly falling asleep.

Spike was looking at her, waiting for her to fall asleep. “I love you, too,” he said before joining her, falling into a deep sleep.

They were completely content, not knowing that there was a secret meeting happening about them.

“Cordy, I just don’t think we should do this anymore,” the guy pleaded against his friend.

“Are you backing out? Oh my god, I can’t believe you! You fucking asshole. We had a deal- you get her, and I get him!” Cordelia Chase screamed at him.

“You don’t understand. When I went to see her tonight, I saw her and Spike sitting together, and I realized that they really love each other,” he said.

“That’s not the reason- I know you, Angel O’Connor!” Cordelia shouted at him.

Angel sighed. “Darla is pregnant. I’m going to be a father,” Angel said with a smile on his face. “I wasn’t happy about it at first, but Darla and I are going to try and make this work. I don’t want my son or daughter to grow up knowing that its father was the reason why two people in love broke up. And I don’t want them to have a father that took a girl with force.” Angel looked down. He couldn’t believe what he was thinking. He never raped a girl before- they always went willingly, they all seemed to want him. But he saw the love between Buffy and Spike, the same kind of love that existed between him and Darla. And he really wanted to be a good man, and for once in his pathetic life, he wanted to do the right thing, especially for his baby.

Cordelia looked at him with big eyes, staring holes into him. “I can’t believe it! Angel O’ fucking Connor becoming a father! You actually fucked that whore- I can’t believe you!” Cordelia yelled at him.

“Hey! You shut your mouth. That’s the mother of my baby, and I… I love her,” he whispered. “I really love her.” He looked at Cordelia. “It’s over, Cordy. I’m sorry, but I can’t do it,” he said before walking away.

Cordelia watched leave and sighed. “Damn. I guess I have to do it all alone, then,” she said.



Wrap yourself around me baby
I need a lot of warmth these days
Hold me just tighter baby
I need strength these days

And all the damage I do
Wasn’t meant for you
No I just wanna love you
Will you love me too

Can we forget what I said
I was out of my head
Something that I never meant
But baby, hoping you might understand
I was out of my head, I was out of my head

Try to pull me back down baby
The tights that bind could break
'cause I’m feeling restless lately
I need you these days

And all the damage I do
Wasn’t meant for you
No I just wanna love you
Will you love me too

Can we forget what I said
I was out of my head
Something that I never meant
But baby, hoping you might understand
I was out of my head, I was out of my head

Words can’t mean nothing
I still try to tell
What we have is something
And I know damn well
I’m better with you
And I’m hopeless without
So just get here ‘cause I need you now

But baby hoping you might understand
I was out of my head



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AN: The song is called 'Forget what I said' by Krezip, it's a popular band in Holland, I don't know if you guys ever heard from them. But I thought it was a good song about Buffy's feelings about them breaking up and getting back together.

Thanks to Allison, Livia, gypsy_jin, Caitie, BuffyandSpikeForever and Phoenix for reviewing, I love you!

Don't forget to review for the next chapter =)

~ Spikegirl

AN: Okay, here's another chappy. Special thanks to Allison for betaing this chapter! You're really great!

From the 158 people that read the last chapter, only 5 people reviewed. Come on everyone! We live on reviews you know!
Big thanks to you guys that did review (end of chapter) I love you guys!

~ Spikegirl


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Chapter 19: Branding Our Love

Buffy woke up with Spike’s arms around her. She smiled and rolled over so she was facing him. She smiled as she saw him lying on his side with an innocent look on his face.

‘Definitely not innocent,’ she thought to herself, thinking about all the things that he did to her the previous night. They woke up in the middle of the night and made love three more times. Buffy loved the sex, and she loved the things that Spike whispered when he made love to her.

She remembered last night, how he whispered to her that she was beautiful and that he had never met someone like her. That she was the one for him and that they would be together forever. He also said that she was his little vixen in bed, that he came so hard because she could make it hurt in all the wrong places. And she came, just hearing him say that with that sexy voice of his.

She smiled at him. He really was perfect. She kissed him softly on the lips before moving down his body. She kissed her way down, licking at his nipples, which made Spike gasp in his sleep. She smiled before continuing her way down.

She looked at his cock- he wasn’t hard yet, but he also wasn’t completely soft, either. She smiled and gave a little lick on the head. She never did that before- she saw it in some movies, but other then that... never. She was pretty scared, but she wanted to do it for him. She gave him another lick down the length of him. When she heard him moan, she knew she was doing the right thing. She thought about the movie before opening her mouth and taking the head inside.

“Buffy!” she heard Spike gasp. She looked up and saw that he was still asleep.

‘This is fun!’ she thought to herself.

She opened her mouth wider, taking him in further. She couldn’t get all of him into her mouth- he was way too big for that!

‘God, he tastes good,’ Buffy thought.

She moved her head up and down and heard him moan harder.

“Harder, baby, please, Buffy!” she heard Spike yell. She opened her eyes to look at him. His eyes were half-open, his eyes full of lust.

Buffy sucked him harder, getting more and more of him into her mouth. She thought about the porn movie again, that one she saw when Spike had caught her pleasuring herself, and remembered something that a girl did in that movie. She moved her hand to Spike’s face. He understood the message and took her finger into his mouth and sucked on it. After a couple of seconds, she took it back. Spike looked at her, not knowing what she was planning on doing.

He screamed when he found out- she had put her finger into his ass. “Buffy! Fuck!” he yelled before thrusting into her mouth once and spilling himself inside it. Trusting the movie that she saw, she swallowed his cum.

She wiped her mouth with her hand. “Tasty,” she said, looking at Spike with a smile. She crawled back up and put her arms around him, laying next to him.

“That was a nice wake-up call,” he said with a smile. “Very nice.” Buffy smiled back. “You didn’t have to do that, you know,” Spike said, hoping that she didn’t do that because she thought that she was supposed to do that.

“I know,” she said with a smile, reassuring him. “I wanted to.”

Spike smiled at that and gave her a passionate kiss. They broke apart when they heard Buffy’s stomach, which made her giggle. “I guess I’m hungry,” she said.

“I guess so, too. Well then, I’m going to make you breakfast. You stay right here, rest a bit. I’ll be back in a second,” he said before giving her a little kiss and moving out of bed. He turned around, showing Buffy his other arm.

He was putting his pants back on when he heard Buffy gasp. He turned around. “What’s wrong?” he asked. He looked at Buffy, who was looking at him with wide eyes.

“What did you do?” she asked him.

“What?” he asked.

“Your arm!” Buffy practically yelled at him.

Spike looked down. “Oh.”

“‘Oh’? That’s all you have to say? ‘Oh’?! You have my name tattoed on your arm!” she yelled at him.

“Well, actually, luv, it’s a little heart and key with your name in the heart, not just your name,” he said with an innocent smile, hoping to lighten the mood.

“Not funny, Spike!” she yelled before taking a deep breath. “Why did you do it?” she asked, more calmly now.

He mumbled something that she couldn’t hear. “What?”

“I said because I love you and I want the world to know that I’m yours and that you’re mine,” He said, still looking down, not wanting to see her mad. He was prepared for everything- the yelling, even maybe a slap against his cheek- but he didn’t expect her to push him against the wall.

‘God, I messed up,’ he thought before she kissed him hard. She was practically tearing his lips open, grabbing him by the head to deepen the kiss, grinding herself against him.

“You... are .... mine,” she said between kisses. She gave him another long passionate kiss before pulling back. “And I’m most definitely yours,” she added with a smile.

Spike smiled at her, giving her a big hug. “I thought that you’d be mad,” he said.

“Well, I admit it is pretty stupid. A thing like that is pretty permanent, you know, but that only shows how much you love me,” She said with a smile. “And the world should definitely know that you belong to me.”

Spike gave her a tender kiss, and Buffy whimpered. “I love you,” she said.

“I love you, too.”

Buffy smiled at him. “Good, now go and get me some breakfast,” She said with a big smile. Spike chuckled and gave her a little kiss.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said before walking towards the stairs, giving a little yelp when Buffy pinched him on the butt.




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Thanks to Allison, Shippy, Caitie, Brittany, Bint, Kiera Thornton, BuffyandSpikeForever! You guys are great!


Please don't forget to review, it really make me write faster =) Really!

~ Spikegirl

AN : I can't believe that I got so many reviews!!!!
You guys are so f*cking great =)
Thanks to Allison for betaing this chapter!


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Chapter 20: Trusting an enemy

Buffy wanted to get some icecream, so she begged Spike, but he still didn’t want to get out of bed. She wanted to go to a little place where her mother always took her.
They didn’t only sell ice cream- they sold a lot of other stuff, like candy, small gifts, balloons, posters, coffee, cake, and other things like that. There were tables where you could just sit and enjoy the food that you bought, along with a little corner for teenagers to just hang out.

The owner of the shop was a really good friend of the family.
He had always turned the shop into a big partyhouse when it was Buffy’s birthday. His name was Ben, but she called him ‘Uncle Benny’.

Uncle Benny died of old age a couple of years ago- another man that she loved that had left her life. But Buffy wanted to see that shop again so that she could see the thing that made her happy when she was younger, along with introducing it to the one that made her happy now. Spike, however, wasn’t in the mood for ice cream- not that he didn’t like it, but he liked something else a lot more.

“But, Spike, you already got a taste of that like five times!” she yelled, giving him a pout that she knew he couldn’t refuse.

After Spike had made her breakfast, he brought it to her bed, but she didn’t eat a lot of it because a certain someone kept sucking and nibbling on her nipples, which made Buffy crazy with lust. She was sore all over from their extreme lovemaking, but she didn´t care about any of that when he had crawled down her body to ´kiss and make it better´.

“Please, can we go?” Buffy asked him, still giving him one of her adorable pouts.

Spike looked at her. ‘God, she knows I can’t resist that pout,’ he thought to himself. ‘Fucking evil, that is.’

“But, kitten, it’s 10 o’clock- no shop in Sunnydale is open this late.”

He gave her a confused look when he saw her grin. “I know, but I have the key,” she said.

Spike looked at her, staring into her eyes. “Is there something that you’re not telling me, luv?” he asked her, finding it weird that she had the key.

Buffy gave a sigh. “The shop was owned by this guy that I knew, named Uncle Benny. He gave my mom and I a key in case we had weird cravings at night. Which we had like all the time,” she said with a smile, thinking about the good memories she had with Uncle Benny. “I don’t know if the key fits anymore- Uncle Benny died a couple of years ago- but we can try.”
Spike kissed her on the cheek and got out of bed.

“Let’s go,” he said before grabbing his pants and putting them on. He looked at Buffy, who was smiling at him. She got out of bed and walked towards him, wrapping her arms around him and giving him a passionate kiss. They were both breathing hard when she pulled back.

“What was that for, luv?” Spike asked her.

She smiled. “For being the best boyfriend ever.”



They were walking hand in hand towards the ice cream shop, just talking and laughing together, not worrying about a thing at all. They were feeling completely safe.

They didn’t notice that someone was watching them, someone who was holding a knife in her hand. A someone called Cordelia Chase.

“You won’t be laughing after I’m through with you, Buffy Summers,” Cordelia said to herself.

She had a plan to make Spike fall into her arms. It was pretty simple, really- she was going to kill Buffy Summers, torturing her first, ofcourse. And when Spike was crying for her, she would come to him and be the sensitive girl and help him with his pain, be his little saviour. And then she would kill him after using him as her little sex-slave. ‘Nobody rejects Cordelia Chase!’ She only needed Buffy to be alone for just a couple of seconds. ‘Then I finally get what I want.’

She was just about to come closer so she could follow them better when she heard a cell phone go off.

She saw Buffy searching for it in the pockets of her coat before finally finding it.

”Who is it?” Spike asked when Buffy was looking at her cell phone with a weird look.

Buffy shrugged. “I don’t know.” She pushed a button and brought the cell phone to her ear.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Buffy, it’s Angel. We met at the mansion with Spike,” she heard through the phone.

She looked confused for a moment before she remembered who he was. “Oh right, are you looking for Spike?” She didn’t know why he would call her on her cell phone. She didn’t even know how he got her number.

”I’m actually looking for the both of you. There’s something that I have to tell you guys, and you need to trust me on this, alright? Please, it’s really hard for me to tell you,” he said with a serious voice.

“Alright, hold on,” She said before moving the phone away from her ear. She looked at Spike with a frown. “It’s Angel,” she said.

“Angel? What does he want?”

“I don’t know, but he says that he needs to talk to us. He sounds pretty serious, Spike.”

“Alright, let me hear him, too,” he said. Buffy turned the phone so Spike could hear Angel, as well.

“Okay, I’m back. Spike’s here, too,” she said through the phone.

“Good. Now, this might sound a bit strange, but I’m serious and telling the truth. Please don’t interrupt me, okay? It’s a long story.”

“Okay, Angel, tell us. What’s going on?” Buffy asked him.

“Alright, well you guys may know that Cordelia always had some sort of crush on me. That went away when you came to our school, Spike. Cordelia wants you, and you really pissed her off when you rejected her because of Buffy. She never gets rejected, and she wants to make you pay for that, but she wants you, too. Trust me, she’ll do everything in her power to get you...” Angel said through the phone but was interrupted when Buffy started cursing.

“Stupid bitch, who does she thinks she is?” she mumbled to herself. Spike softly squeezed her hand.

“Please no interruptions- I’m not finished yet. Anyway... Buffy, when I first saw you, I must admit that I thought you were pretty hot. I wanted you, just like Cordelia wants Spike. So...” Angel stopped for a moment, and they heard him sigh. “Cordelia and I made a deal- we were going to break you guys up so that I could have you and Cordelia could have Spike...” Again he was interrupted, but now by Spike.

“You bloody wanker!” he yelled through the phone.

“Please, I’m still not done yet,” Angel pleaded. He knew they were going to be pissed off, but he needed to warn them.
“A week ago, I found out that I’m going to be a father, so I told Cordelia that the deal was off, that I didn’t want to be a part of it anymore. I’m going to be a dad, and I want my kid to be proud of me. So I backed out, and that made Cordelia even madder. I figured that she would stop because she was all alone on this, but just a minute ago, I found out that I was wrong. She called me and told me that she’s going to kill Buffy and that she was going to kill you later, Spike, after you knew the hurt of losing someone you love. I´m really sorry for making that deal with Cordelia, but I just want to warn you. Please don´t let her win...” That was all they heard before he hung up on them.

Buffy looked at Spike with tears in her eyes. “What are we going to do, Spike?” she asked him.

Spike didn’t know what to do, either. He thought about it for a minute. “We are going to the ice cream shop, and we’re going to lock the doors and get some ice cream. She knows where you live, and she knows where I live, but she doesn’t know that we’re going to the shop. We’re safe there,” he said, hoping that he was right.

Buffy gave him a small smile.

“Don’t worry, baby,” Spike told her. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

Spike grabbed her hand, and they walked towards the shop again. When they arrived there two minutes later, Buffy opened the door and walked in. After they were both inside, they locked the door again.

“Where are they? And who was that on the phone?” Cordelia asked herself.



Buffy and Spike were sitting on a couch inside the shop. Buffy was resting her head against his shoulder, sitting comfortably against him.

“Thank god that the key fit,” Buffy said.

Spike nodded. They were both eating their ice cream cones now- Buffy had a chocolate flavor, which was her favourite, while Spike had a vanilla one.

They didn’t know what to say, both thinking about what Angel had told them. They felt like they were living in a dream- stuff like this didn’t happen in real life. There was a long silence before Buffy broke it.

“Why does she want to kill us, Spike? I mean, I know why, but how can someone kill another person because of a reason like that?” she asked him, desperately needing the answers.

“I don’t know, luv. I don’t understand it, either. Some people are just ill in their heads and don’t know any better,” he replied.

Buffy gave him a sad smile. “What’s wrong?” he asked her when he saw the look on her face.

“That’s what my mom said to me once, when I asked her about my dad,” she answered. “I couldn’t understand why he would hurt me, and she said that he was ill in his head and didn’t know any better. I didn’t believe that, though- I thought that it was because he just couldn’t love me. That I wasn’t a person that someone could love.”

“That’s not true, luv. I love everything about you, as does Giles, and so did your mother. It’s true what your mother said, though. I had an aunt once who was ill mentally- she was hearing voices telling her that she was born to kill people. She didn’t hurt anyone, though, because she knew in her heart that it wasn’t right, that it wasn’t her. So she went to an institution for people with the urge to hurt other people or themself. All on her own free will,” he said, thinking back to the memories.

“I’m sorry,” Bufy said, giving him a hug. They were sitting like that for a while, comfortable with just holding each other, when they suddenly heard a scream.

“HELP ME! PLEASE, NO! HELP!!!!!”






I won't tell you what I'm thinking
'Cause it's not the same thing you're thinking too
You could say I got a best friend
And she's always telling me what to do

She's out of sight but easy to find
She's in the front of my mind

The little voice in my head won't let me forget
The little voice in my head is never misled
All of this noise is what keeps me from making a mess
The little voice in my head just won't let me get with you

La lala la la......

When I see you I admit
I start to lose my grip and all of my cool
You smell so sweet just like my perfume
What have you been doing since I left you

You're always there in my thoughts
But that doesn't mean that it's on

The little voice in my head won't let me forget
The little voice in my head is never misled
All of this noise is what keeps me from making a mess
The little voice in my head just won't let me get with you

I know I sound insane, like I'm playing games
'Cause all I really want is you
But there are some things a girl won't do

The little voice in my head won't let me forget
The little voice in my head is never misled
All of this noise is what keeps me from making a mess
The little voice in my head just won't let me get with you

Lalalala lalala lalala lalala la la lalala lalala

The little voice

Lalala lalala lalala la la

The little voice


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AN: This song is called ‘Little Voice’ by Hilary Duff. I thought about it when I wrote about Spike’s aunt.

Thanks to Karyn, Seraiza, Phoenix, B, gypsy_jin, Brittany, Caitie, Bint, Allison, Kiera Thornton, Tasha, Blondiebear, Shippy, and BuffyandSpikeForever.
You guys are so sweet!!!! I love you!

Special thanks to Kiera Thornton for leaving so many reviews and to Allison for betaing this chapter and for always returning it so fast.

~ Spikegirl

Don’t forget to review!!


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Chapter 21: Saving an Enemy

“I’m sorry,” Buffy said, giving him a hug. They were sitting like that for a while, comfortable with just holding each other, when they suddenly heard a scream.

“HELP ME! PLEASE, NO! HELP!!!!!”

Buffy and Spike sat up and listened to the screams.

“That’s Cordelia,” Spike said.

Buffy looked at Spke. “We have to help her,” she told him.

”What if it’s a trap?” Spike asked her, scared about losing the one he loved.

Buffy looked at him with big eyes. He looked into them, not only seeing that she was scared, but also that she was determined about something. “What if it’s not?” Buffy asked him.

Spike sighed. “Alright.”

They stood up and ran to the door, Buffy quickly opening it, and they started running again, towards the screams still coming from Cordelia. They saw her being held by three guys, probably their ages, who were pulling on Cordelia’s clothes. Her shirt was already ripped off, revealing her black bra, and her pants were unbuttoned but still on her.

“Hey!” Buffy yelled at the guys when she saw them.

The three guys looked at her and Spike. “Shit,” they heard the smallest guy mutter.

“Well, hello, sweetheart,” the biggest one said to Buffy.

Spike moved in front of her, and the guys laughed. “What do you say, boys?” the biggest guy, who was probably the leader, asked his friends. “The brunette or the blonde?”

“Blond,” they both replied.

Spike looked at the guys with hate and anger in his eyes. Spike was even smaller than the smallest guy, who was holding Cordelia, but he was determined to fight them to death if that’s what it would take to ensure Buffy’s safety.

“How about neither?” he asked.
The leader moved towards Spike, letting go of Cordelia.

“Well, boy, maybe you’d like to take it up the ass, but we don’t go there,” he said, laughing at Spike.

Spike couldn’t hold his temper anymore and hit the guy in the jaw. “Fuck!” the leader yelled, falling on the ground. He looked back at Spike, blood coming from his mouth.

“You’re going to pay for that, boy!” he shouted before getting back up. “Mike, get the blond girl!” he yelled to his friend before walking towards Spike again. “You get to watch us fucking your sweet girl.” He grinned at Spike, which made Spike even madder. The man hit Spike with an angry hook and slammed him against the wall beside them. The man moved his mouth to his ear. ”Watch your girl.”

Spike looked at Buffy. He saw the other guy, now known as Mike, walking to her.

“Come on, Mike, you know what to do. Gives us something to look at, preferably her sweet titties,” the leader said.

“Oh I will, Rick. I will,” Mike answered with an evil smile. He was standing in front of Buffy now and moved to rip her shirt off.

“Get away from her, you asshole!” Spike yelled at him, trying harder to get away from Rick, but he hit him in the face.

“Shut up and enjoy the show!” Rick spat at him.

“Yeah,” Mike said. “Enjoy us fucking your girl.” He moved to Buffy again, who was looking at him with anger in her eyes. He put his hand in his pocket and revealed a knife.

“Come on, sweetheart, come to daddy,” he said, grabbing her shirt with one hand and moving the knife towards the buttons of her shirt with his other one.

“I don’t think so!” Buffy yelled before kicking him between his legs.

“AHHHH!” Mike yelled. Buffy kicked him again, this time in the stomach, and Mike fell to the ground. Buffy saw the knife that had fallen and picked it up, looking at Rick with a smile on her face. Spike and Rick were both looking at her, Rick with an afraid expression and Spike with an amazed one.

Spike used Rick’s shock to kick him, which caused him to let go of Spike. He hit him again, this time in his stomach. Then he did a roundkick at his face, and Rick fell on the ground, next to his friend. Mike was still lying on his back, his hands covering his family jewels.

Buffy and Spike moved to the other guy, who was still holding Cordelia. Cordelia was still struggling, but the man holding her was much stronger than her. The man looked at the strong couple, who were both giving him a smirk that could only be described as terrifying. He looked at his friends and then back at the couple again. He let go of Cordelia and ran away as fast as he could, not looking back.

Buffy and Spike looked at each other, laughing at the coward. Spike grabbed her head and gave her a hard kiss, and Buffy pulled back with a look full of lust.

“You really turned me on, kicking that guy’s ass,” he said with a smirk. “How did you do that?” he asked her.

Buffy smiled. “Self-defense classes. I took them after my mom and I moved to Sunnydale, just in case my dad came back,” she answered. She looked at Spike’s hard-on, which she could clearly see through his jeans. She moved her hand down and squeezed it, making Spike moan, and Buffy smirked at him. “Later, honey. We have to deal with Cordelia.” She looked at the girl who had already put on her shirt.

They walked to Cordelia, stopping in front of her. Cordelia was looking down, but she looked up when she saw them four feet in front of her.

“Thank you,” she said with a smile.

“We know about your plan,” Buffy said with a glare. “We know all about it.”

Cordelia looked at them in shock. “H...how?” she asked.

“We have our sources,” Spike answered, looking at her with disgust.

‘Angel,’ Cordelia thought to herself. She looked at the couple, who were holding hands. ‘Why would they save me if they knew what my plan was?’ she asked herself.

As if Buffy could read her mind, she said, “We’re not like you- we don’t hurt people or let them get hurt.”

Cordelia looked back down again. “I’m... I’m sorry, I just... I was just so mad about being rejected. I wasn’t thinking...” she started.

“No, you weren’t,” Spike spat at her.

“I’m sorry, I won’t hurt you anymore. Not after this...” she sighed. “I’m really sorry,” she said again before walking away.



Three weeks later, Buffy and Spike were sitting on the couch in Spike’s living room, watching tv, when they heard the door open. Giles walked in, carrying groceries in one hand and some mail in the other.

“Hi, Giles,” Buffy and Spike said.

Giles smiled at them. “Hi, kids. Oh, there’s a letter for you, for both of you.”

Buffy and Spike looked at each other. Giles gave Spike the letter, they both looked at it.

“It’s addressed to the both of us,” Spike said, confused.

“Let’s just open it.”

Dear Buffy and Spike,

You must be wondering why you got this letter. The thing is, I’m leaving Sunnydale. When you get this, I’ll probably be gone already. I told my parents about what happened, about everything that happened. About the plan that I had about you and about the attempted rape. My parents wanted to prosecute them, but I asked them not to. I don’t want to deal with it- it’s in the past... I’m moving on.

After I told my parents about everything, we all agreed that it was best that I went to an institution for people with the same problems as I have. I’ll probably be there for a while, but after that, I’ll be in San Francisco.

I just wanted to say that I’m sorry about lying to you and almost killing you. I really wish that I didn’t do it, or wasn’t planning on doing it, anyway. I hope that being in the institution will make me a better person.

You really are a great couple, and I wish you both a great life together. Again, I’m sorry for everything.

Cordelia Chase

“Wow,” Buffy said.

Spike could only nod.

“Atleast we know that we’re safe now,” she said with a small smile.

“Yeah, we’re safe,” Spike said, wrapping his arms around her.

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AN: Thanks to Allison, Caitie, Bint, BuffyandSpikeForever, gyspy_jin, Brittany, B, Phoenix for reviewing!
Thanks to Allison for betaing this chapter!

Please don't forget to review! If I get a lot of reviews, I'll post chapter 22 tomorrow!

~ Spikegirl

Chapter 22: Unexpected

Things were going really well- Buffy was officially a Sunnydale High student and had really great friends. When she was introduced to the Scooby gang, they immediately let her in. She couldn’t wish for better friends.

Willow Rosenberg was her best friend- they shared all their secrets. Willow knew about her father and Ford. Buffy was scared that she would think differently of her, but all she did was hug her and listen to her while she told her story.

She had met Xander Harris before, but they were really good friends now. She always laughed at his jokes, and he came to her when he was having trouble with his father. Things were better between him and his father now, but it still wasn’t perfect.

Then there was Anya Jenkins, Xander’s girlfriend. She liked Anya because of her bluntness- she always said what she was thinking.

And last, there was Willow’s boyfriend Daniel Osbourne, but everyone called him Oz. She didn’t really know him because he doesn’t really talk a lot, but she liked him nonetheless. He’s a good boyfriend to Willow, so he must be nice.

Angel became their friend after a while, but he transferred to a different school to be closer to his girlfriend, who was 6 months pregnant.

Things were hard at first- she was still a little scared about being around a lot of people. Other students didn’t know what to think of her, but after a while, things went better, and they accepted Buffy as any other student at Sunnydale High.

Spike had told her about the tapes that he listened to, and Buffy was okay with it, partly thankful that she didn’t have to tell that story again.

It was Wednesday, and the gang was sitting at a table during their break, just talking and laughing like friends do.

“So, a movie night on Friday, Buff?” Xander asked her, looking at her with his puppy eyes.

Buffy laughed. “Of course, Xand,” Buffy answered him. They always did a movie-night once a month at Buffy’s place, primarily there because there were no parents and it was simply the biggest house. Buffy didn’t mind at all- she loved having her friends around. They usually spent the night, too. It was a lot of fun- she wouldn’t trade it for the world. Buffy felt like a teenager again.

“Aren’t you going to eat, luv?” Spike looked at her with a face full of concern before noticing the spaghetti that was lying untouched on her plate.

Buffy shook her head. “I’m not...” she started but was interrupted when she suddenly felt sick. She stood up and ran to the bathroom.

The gang looked confused, and Spike stood up to go after her to make sure she was okay, but Willow stopped him.

“I’ll go after her- it’s probably a girl thing. Besides, you’re not allowed to go into the girls room.” She gave him a soft smile, assuring him that she would take care of her.

Willow walked towards the girls’ bathroom. She opened the door and walked inside, looking around. “Buffy? It’s me, Willow.”

She heard a small laugh. “I know it’s you, Will,” Buffy said softly.

Willow moved towards the voice. “Can I come in?” she asked her, wanting to make sure that her friend was okay. She heard Buffy open the door and walked through it before locking it again. She saw her friend sitting on the toilet, fully clothed, with her head in her hands.

“Are you okay?” Willow asked her, scared to see her friend like this. She saw Buffy shaking her head before she looked up at her, and Willow could see that she’d been crying and that her hair was messy. Willow looked closely into her eyes- it looked like she hadn’t slept in days. “Sweetie, what’s wrong?”

Buffy sighed. “I’ve been throwing up for a while now. I didn’t know why- I thought that I was just getting a cold or something. But then I realised that... that I could be...” She stopped with another sigh.

“That you could be pregnant,” Willow finished for her, knowing what her friend was trying to tell her.

Buffy nodded. “About 2 months ago, Spike and I had... ehm… you know.” She looked at Willow, who was blushing, proving that she knew what she was trying to say. “And we didn’t use protection.”

“Oh, Buffy.” Willow gave her a big hug. “Did you do a pregnancy test?”

Buffy nodded. “I got one from Giles when he was still my teacher. I did that test, and it said that I was pregnant... but Giles said that those tests weren’t always right, so I wanted to go to the doctor, but I’m scared,” she said in a whisper.

“Did you tell Spike?”

She shook her head. “I didn’t know how. Besides, I don’t want to tell him before I’m completely sure,” she explained.

“We’ll go to the doctor after school, alright?”

Buffy smiled and hugged her friend. “Thanks, Will.”


So, here they were, sitting in the waiting room. It was really hard getting there. When she had exited the girls’ bathroom, she had to convince Spike that everything was okay, and boy, that sure was hell. She had to tell him over and over that she was okay, that she was just a little tired. Then he wanted to take her home and get her into bed so that she could relax, but she wanted to go to the doctor with Willow, so she had to make an excuse for that, too. She knew she had hurt his feelings when she didn’t accept his offer to take her home, but she really needed to know if she was pregnant or not. So she kissed him and told him that she loved him before running to Willow.

She was shaken from her thought when she heard the doctor calling her name. “Buffy Summers,” the doctor called again.

She stood up, and Willow squeezed her hand to wish her good luck. She smiled back at her and followed the doctor into the room. Willow had asked her if she wanted her to come into the room, but Buffy told her no. She knew that Willow wasn’t fond of doctors- Buffy wasn’t, either.


The door opened again after about 20 minutes. She saw Buffy walk out before giving the doctor a handshake. Buffy walked to her and gave her a hug.

“How did it go?” Willow was just as nervous as her friend.

“It went fine- he said that he would call me as soon as he got the results. So I just have to wait.” She gave her friend a soft smile to assure her that she was fine.

“Let’s go home,” Willow said.


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AN: Thanks so much to Allison, blondiebear, Brittany, Bint, Caitie, gypsy_jin, BuffyandSpikeForever, ~*~Tasha~*~ and sarah g!
And thanks to Allison for betaing this chapter.


Is she really pregnant? Review and find out!


~ Spikegirl!

AN: Mary, I just want to say that I'm sorry that you feel that way. If you really feel that way than I suggest that you don't read this chapter.

And to everyone else...... The next chapter is the last one, but I'm busy writing a new story. There is one problem though, I don't have a beta. Does anyone know a good beta, or is one? Please let me know!

Thanks to Allison for betaing this chapter!

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Chapter 23: Results

The gang was watching a movie- it was a movie night, after all. They were watching ‘War of the Worlds’, a movie that Xander had picked out. Buffy and Spike were sitting on the ground, Spike with his back against the couch and Buffy with her back against him. They were sitting comfortably with Spike’s arms around her. The rest of the gang was sitting on the couch, each couple with their arms around each other.

The doctor hadn’t called Buffy yet, and Buffy got more nervous every day- the wait was killing her. Willow asked her to do the movie night another night, but Buffy said that the distraction would be good for her.

And what a distraction it was, especially when Spike was kissing her neck. Buffy moaned.

“Spike, maybe we shouldn’t,” she whispered, looking at her friends, who were watching the movie, pretending that they didn’t see what they were doing.

“They won’t notice,” Spike said with a smile before moving to kiss her neck again. He was interrupted by a blunt Anya.

“Yeah, Buffy, we won’t notice. Go back to the kissing.” She smiled at the couple, and everyone laughed. Spike just sighed, and Buffy smiled back at him before giving him a little kiss.

“Later.” She felt guilty for not telling him about her visit to the doctor, but she wasn’t sure how he would react.

Spike smiled and went back to watching the movie. Buffy was having trouble concentrating on it, though- she kept thinking about the baby, and the fact that she was very horny now wasn’t really helping. Besides that, she really needed to pee.

She grabbed the remote and paushed the movie. “It’s potty-break time for Buffy.” She smiled before walking towards the bathroom.

Just when Buffy closed the door, her home phone went off. Spike looked at his friends, not knowing if he should answer it or not. Xander shrugged.

“It’s probably just Giles,” he said. “Buffy doesn’t know a lot of people besides us.”

Spike nodded. ‘Of course it’s Giles,’ he thought to himself.

He picked up the phone, which was next to the couch, before Willow could stop him. She forgot that Buffy’s doctor would call her for the results. ‘This won’t end well.’

“Hold on, Giles,” Spike said when he picked up the phone. “I’ll put you on speaker.” He pushed the buton and sat back on the couch.

“Ehm... Buffy? Buffy Summers?” they heard a man say. “This is Dr. James Hendricks. Are you there?”

Everyone except for Willow looked confused. She sat on the couch, not saying anything- she was too nervous to speak.

“This is Sp...ehm.. William. I’m Buffy’s boyfriend. She isn’t here right now.”

“Oh, William, right. Buffy told me about you. Well, I’ve got the results back, and I’m sure I can tell you since it involves you, too,” the doctor said.

“Results?” Spike asked.

‘Oh my god, please tell me that she isn’t sick or anything,’ he thought.

“Maybe we shouldn’t...” Willow started but was interrupted when Xander shushed her.

“Yes, the ehm... pregnancy results. I have to make this quick- there’s an emergency- but the test was positive. Congratulations, William, you’re going to be a father. Please send my congratulations to Buffy,” he said before hanging up.

Everyone was quiet- they didn’t know what to say. Spike couldn’t believe the doctor’s news. ‘You’re going to be a father.’ That was all he kept hearing.

Buffy came out of the bathroom with a smile before looking at the faces of her friends.

“What’s wrong?” They looked like they had seen a ghost.

Spike stood up and walked towards her with an angry look on his face. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Buffy looked at him. “What? Tell you what?”

“Don’t act stupid, Buffy! Why?!” he yelled at her.

Buffy looked at Willow with a ‘is-he-talking-about-what-i-think-he’s-talking-about’ look, and Willow nodded. “The doctor just called- Spike put him on speaker… we thought it was Giles.”

“Oh god,” Buffy mumbled.

“Why didn’t you tell me, Buffy?!” Spike yelled at her again.

“Stop it!” Buffy yelled back. “Stop yelling at me. I don’t even… what did he say?” she asked, more calmly now.

“Positive.”

“Oh god, I’m pregnant,” Buffy mumbled to herself, walking to sit on the couch before she fell. Her friends weren’t in the room anymore- they decided to go home, knowing that the couple needed to talk.

Buffy started to cry, not knowing if they were tears of sadness or tears of happiness. Spike kneeled in front of her and took her hands in his, and she looked at him with tears rolling down her cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “I didn’t want to tell you when I didn’t know for sure. I didn’t know what to do.” She looked down at their combined hands. “What are you going to do, Spike?”

He gave her a kiss on her nose. “We’re going to be parents- that’s what we are going to do.”

Buffy smiled at him. “You want this baby?” She needed to be sure.

He looked at her in surprise. “Of course I want this baby, luv! It’s a little you and me, something that we made together. You thought I wouldn’t want it?”

Buffy looked at him, seeing that he definitely looked hurt. “I didn’t know what to think. This is kind of new to me, too, you know. I’ve read these stories where the guy goes away when he finds out that his girlfriend is pregnant.”

He grabbed her face to make her look at him. “Buffy, I am never going to leave you or this baby. Alright?” He needed to make her understand that. He put his hand on her stomach.

‘Our baby is in there.’

Buffy nodded before moving her head down and kissing him. Spike moaned and picked her up, and Buffy kept kissing him, grinding against his body.

She pulled back long enough to whisper her need to him. “Please, Spike- bedroom.”

They kissed again, Buffy softly nibbling on his lip. Spike walked up the stairs to her bedroom. They parted and pulled their clothes off, needing each other more then anything. After they were both undressed, Spike picked her up and laid her down on the bed. He kissed her again, trailing soft kisses down her neck to her breasts. He suckled hard on her nipples, making her cry out in pleasure.

“Ughh...God, you’re so good at this,” Buffy panted.

Before Spike could get any lower, Buff flipped them over so she was on top. Spike looked at her with a surprised look, and
she smiled at him. “The rules have changed now, lover,” she said before moving down his body. Licking his nipples, making him gasp in need, she smiled and bit his nipples roughly.

“Fuck!” he shouted, moving his body to grind his erection against her wet center. “Please, luv, I need to be inside of you,” he whispered. “This won’t hurt the baby, right?”

She smiled. “No, it won’t hurt the baby. Besides, it’s still so small.” She kissed him passionately. “I need you inside of me, baby,” she said before sinking down on his cock, taking him all the way in. “Ugh! So good, always so fucking good,” she moaned.

“Fuck, baby! You’re so fucking tight!”

Buffy moved on top of him, resting her hands on his chest. She moved up and down, taking him deeper and deeper inside of her.

“Harder, luv. Ride me harder, baby,” Spike pleaded, needing a release.

Buffy complied and moved harder up and down, fucking herself on his cock.

“Fuck, so deep!” she yelled. Her pussy ached from the aggressive pounding, but she loved it. Spike grabbed her hips and pushed her even harder against him.

Buffy came hard when Spike flicked her clit, screaming her release. Her muscles clenched around him, and he kept thrusting inside her before spilling his seed into her. Buffy had fallen against him with her head on his chest.

“We’re going to be great parents,” Spike said to her, kissing her on the top of her head.

“Yeah,” Buffy agreed. They soon fell asleep, Buffy lying on top of him and with him still buried deep inside of her.


----------------------------------------------------

Thanks so much to max, sarah g, Brittany, blondiebear, Allison, gypsy_jin, BuffyandSpikeForever, SpikesBuffy, Caitie, Bint, ~*~Tasha~*~ and Phoenix for reviewing!

Don't forget to review, the last chapter people!

AN: Hi everyone! I'm sorry it's been so long, I've been really busy lately! But anyway... I'm doing a new story and I REALLY need a beta! Do you know a good one or do you beta yourself, please let me know!

Thanks SO much to Allison for betaing the last couple of hapters of this story.
And to all the people that reviewed for this story, I love you!!

Well... here's the last chapter!


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~ Chapter 24: Where Are You Now (Epilogue)

The gang, including Giles, was sitting round the table in the library. They had told Giles, and surprisingly, he wasn’t mad about it. He wasn’t completely thrilled, either, of course, but he had congratulated the couple and promised to help them if they needed him. He still wasn’t sure how they were going to manage because they were still so young, but he had faith in them. He was actually excited when he finally realized that he was going to be a grandfather.

Nobody in Sunnydale High knew that Buffy was pregnant yet, only the gang and Giles. She wasn’t really showing, and school would end in less than two months. Buffy and Spike wanted everyone to know but not when they were still in high school- they wanted to graduate first.

Buffy was sitting on Spike’s lap with his arms wrapped around her. His hands were resting on her stomach, which had a slight bump. They were just talking and having fun- it was after school, so they didn’t have to be quiet. They didn’t notice the door opening or the man walking in. Giles was the first to notice the man looking at them with a strange expression on his face.

“Can we help you, sir?” Giles asked him.

“I’m here for Elizabeth.” He hadn’t taken his eyes off of Buffy.

The whole table went quiet. Everyone looked at the man standing in front of them before looking at Buffy, who was looking at the strange man with a scared look on her face. Buffy moved her arms tighter around Spike, who in return pushed her more against him, trying to keep her and the baby safe from the man who she was obviously afraid of.

“Kitten, who is that?” Spike whispered softly into her ear.

She didn’t look at him- she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the man standing in front of her.

“What do you want?” She finally found her voice when she realized that she was safe with her friends and boyfriend.

“I want to talk to you.”

“Like hell.” She really didn’t want to talk to him. Her friends were intently watching the exchange- they didn’t know what to do. Willow was standing behind her boyfriend, feeling that something big was about to happen. Anya didn’t know why everyone was suddenly so quiet and wanted to say something but was stopped when Xander put a hand over her mouth.

“Elizabeth, I…” the man started but was interrupted when an angry Buffy stood up and started yelling at him.

“My name is Buffy! There are only a few people who have the right to call me Elizabeth, and you’re not one of them!” she yelled, looking at him with an angry glare.

“Please, Eli…Buffy. I’ve changed- I’m not like I was before,” he tried to convince her, but it wasn’t working.

Spike had a pretty good idea who the man was, so he stood up, standing beside his girl to protect her if necessary. He didn’t want the man around her or his baby.

“Someone like you can’t change.”

“A lot has happened since you last saw me. I… I lost my job… I lost everything. I have no place to live,” he ended in a whisper, looking at her with a sad look on his face.

“Welcome to my world.” Buffy couldn’t stop the bitterness in her voice when she said that.

“I’m still your father, Buffy. Doesn’t that mean something, doesn’t family mean something to you?” he asked her.

“My family means a lot to me.” She put her hand on her stomach and looked behind her. The table was empty- everyone had moved behind her to protect her when they heard who he was. Buffy smiled. “These people are my family, and I would do anything for them. But you’re not family- you lost that right when you first laid a hand on me,” she told him, not feeling sorry for him at all.

“Don’t you care about me?”

“Like you cared about me? Like you cared about mom?” She fought to keep the tears inside.

‘He isn’t worth it enough to cry,’ she thought to herself.

“What about me?” He looked at her with innocent eyes. “What am I supposed to do?”

“You could die, for all I care. You’re already dead to me,” she answered.

Her father looked at her and then at her friends, who were standing behind her, looking at him like he was dirt. They would obviously do anything to protect her. He wasn’t going to start something with so many people around, so he gave Buffy a brief nod before walking out of the library.

Buffy turned to her friends.

“Thanks, guys,” she said with a small smile. Before she knew what happened, she was involved in a big Scooby-hug. She smiled to herself.

‘This is my family.’



People were clapping until Danny Jameson left the stage.
The bartender, also known as Bert, entered the stage. He walked towards the microphone and smiled at the audience. It was a busy night. It always was on ‘open-stage night’- everyone who wanted to sing could come up the stage. It was the most popular day of the month.

He coughed to get attention. “Well, that certainly was a great song from Danny Jameson. And boy was he hot!” he yelled through the microphone, which made all the girls in the audience yell and shout. “Alright, alright. He was great, but there’s someone else waiting for a chance to come up and sing tonight- my dear friend Buffy Summers, ladies and gentlemen! Give her a round of applause!”

Everyone clapped when Buffy entered the stage. She gave them a shy smile and walked to the microphone. Giles asked her to sing tonight, knowing that it would do her good, and she agreed. Singing made her feel free, and that was exactly what she needed right now.

”Hi, everyone.” She looked at all the people in the audience, and she saw Spike looking at her with a smile on his face before giving her a wink. She smiled- she had dressed for him tonight. She was wearing a strappy red dress that exposed a lot of cleavage. It was classy, but not slutty. “I’m going to sing a song called ‘Where are you now’- I wrote it myself.”

She didn’t notice that her father had slipped into the Bronze and was walking towards her friends.

“Hello,” he said to them, hoping that they would be his way to his daughter.

They all looked at him with murderous glares.

‘I guess not,’ he thought.

“You get the hell away from us, from Buffy!” Spike moved towards him to kick him out, if necessary, but his uncle stopped him.

“What do you want from Buffy?” Giles asked the man standing next to him.

“Money,” he smiled. “Joyce put some money aside for her. She will get it when she’s eighteen, and that’s in a couple of months. If I’m correct, it’s about a million dollars, and I want it.” He gave them an evil smirk.

The gang gasped, not believing that Buffy would get that amount of money from her mother.

“You’ll never get the money, so leave and don’t come back,” Giles threatened him.

“Look, she may have told me that she doesn’t care what happens to me, but she needs me. I’m still her father- she’s lost without me.” He smirked at them.

‘That bitch can’t live without me. I’ll make her give me that money before dumping her on the streets.’

“Really?” Giles looked at him. “Why don’t you listen to your daughter, then?” He pointed at Buffy on the stage, who was just beginning to sing her song.

As I look back on things you have said in the past
I hear you talking, trying to make me understand
That you’re better than me, that you’re stronger and wiser
It made me think that you must have been out of your head
But now I know that you really don’t know who I am

I am better, I’m stronger, I’m wiser and I am flying

I’ve got everything I want, everything I need
After all those times you’ve tried
To push me in the ground
Trying to pull me down
Where are you now?
Where are you now?

She looked at her friends, who were sitting at the table, looking at her. She didn’t notice her father because he was standing in the shadows.

You thought I’d be lost now
Without you to hold onto my hand
But you’re mistaken
I finally know who I am.

I am better, I’m stronger, I know what I want
I’m wiser, I’m smarter, I know how to get there, I’m flying.

I’ve got everything I want, everything I need
After all those times you’ve tried
To push me in the ground
Trying to pull me down
Where are you now?

Everything I want, everything I need
After all those times you’ve tried
To push me in the ground
Try to pull me down
Where are you now?
Where are you now?

You’re mistaken
I finally know who I am

She closed her eyes again, singing with every emotion that she had. She thought of her friends, of Giles, of Spike, and of her unborn baby. They were everything that she would ever need.

I’m everything I want, everything I need
After all those times you’ve tried
To push me in the ground
Trying to pull me down
Where are you now?

I’ve got everything I want, everything I need
After all those times you’ve tried
To push me in the ground
Trying to pull me down
Where are you now?
Where are you now?

Everyone was clapping when she stopped singing. She smiled at the audience before quickly moving off the stage to go to her friends.

Everyone at the table was looking at Buffy’s father.

“I guess she doesn’t need you as much as you think she does.” Giles grinned at him.

Hank looked down.

“It would be best if you left.”

Buffy came to the table and sat down on Spike’s lap.

“Hi, guys,” she said with a big smile, not noticing that her father was standing next to Giles.

“Hi, Buffy” the gang replied.

“You were great up there.” Willow smiled, which was confirmed with nods from Xander and Anya. Oz had heard her sing that song many times- he was the one who had made the background music with his guitar. Buffy smiled back at her friends.

“They’re right, luv. You were amazing. You are amazing.” Spike smiled at her, looking at her with pride on his face.

‘God, I’m so proud of her. She’s changed a lot in the last couple of months.’ She smiled at him, not noticing that her father was looking at them with a disgusted expression on his face.

She looked at Giles with a smile, but that smile disappeared when she saw her father standing next to him.

“Get out.” She glared at him. “You’re not welcome here.”

“Now listen to me, young lady. You’re still not eighteen- I could go to social services and get legal custody of you. And life would be just like it was before you and your mother moved to Sunnydale.” He grinned at her.

Spike was about to comment, but Buffy stopped him. She needed to deal with him on her own.

“Yeah, you can try that. But I don’t think that they’ll give you custody of me, seeing that you don’t have a job and don’t have a place to live,” she said, standing up, determined to not let her father win.

“That may be so,” he said after a while. “But what are you going to do without me? Every child needs its parents.”

“I’m not a child anymore. I was forced to grow up a lot in these past years. And I do have a parent.” She gave Giles a soft smile. “He’s more of a father than you could ever be.”

“You’ll still be leaving with me! Social services won’t allow a child to be without its father.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” She grinned at him. “Every child needs its father.” She moved to sit on Spike’s lap again, wrapping her arms around his neck. “That’s why I can’t leave, even if I wanted to. I won’t let my baby grow up without its father.” She moved her hands to her stomach.

Hank looked at her hands, stunned. “You’re pregn… pregnant?”

Buffy smiled. “Yes, I am.” Spike smiled, too, and kissed her bare shoulder.

Before Hank had a chance to say something, Buffy stopped him by continuing what she wanted to say.

“So trust me, Hank, I don’t need you. I’ve got everyone I need sitting right here at the table.” She looked at her friends, who were looking at her with pride in their eyes. “Now leave.” She looked at her father. “Before I let Bert kick you out,” she said, referring to the man standing next to her father.

Hank looked at the man beside him, then at his daughter. “No, I need that money. You’ll never make it without me, bitch,” he said with a grin, and Bert grabbed him by his arm. “Fine, have a nice life, you slut,” he said to her with a smile.

Bert dragged him to the door of the Bronze and kicked him out. “If you ever come near her again, I will make you regret it. Buffy has a lot of friends here that will do anything to keep her safe.” He grinned at him before walking back in the Bronze.


“Are you okay, Buffy?” Willow looked at her with concern.

“Yeah,” she assured her best friend. “I’m glad that I got the chance to deal with him so I can move on. I don’t need him in my life- I’ve got you guys.” She smiled at them, receiving big smiles. “And I’ve got the man that I love,” she said before turning back to Spike and kissing him with passion. They pulled back after a while with big grins on their faces. “And I’m going to have a baby. That’s everything that I need.”

Spike hugged her. “I’m going to be a better father, Buffy, I promise,” he told her.

“I know.” She smiled at him.

Their friends were looking at them with smiles on their faces, happy that their friend was finally at peace.




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Well, this was the last chapter! I had so much fun writing this story, even though I got stuck a couple of times. But a lot of people helped me with ideas to get this story going, thanks you guys for that!
This is my first story that I actually finished, I'm busy with 3 other stories and I still have the story 'Working it out', I don't know if you guys want me to continue that story, let me know.
You guys have been great, giving me so many sweet reviews and I hope that you'll read my next stories =)

Thanks to Allison, blondiebear, sarah g, Brittany, Bint, ~*~Tasha~*~, gypsy_jin, Phoenix, BuffyandSpikeForever, Caite, Kiera Thornton, Superstes Diligo and Superstes which is probably Superstes Diligo too =)

Thanks for all of the reviews and please let me know if anyone knows a good beta 'cause I really need one!

~ Spikegirl