Title: Mistaken Identity

Author: Pari

Disclaimers: This story is meant to entertain not infringe upon anyone’s rights. Although the story plot is original, I do not own the characters or places portrayed within.



~~~~



Mistaken Identity:

It was like poetry in motion every graceful, fluid swing of arms and legs. As if every movement was in slow motion, although they were actually quite swift. It was a dance of sort, one she had been doing since she was 15. A dangerous dance, a dance of death, and yet in still she did it night after night. She is the one girl in all the world Buffy the Vampire Slayer…



~~~~



“What the hell is wrong with me?” She asked as she firmly locked her arm around the vamp’s neck, placing him in a chock hold. “Why?” Punch! “Do I,” Punch! “Always,” Punch! “Attract Vampires?” Flip! “Well at least I ‘can’ kill you.” Stake! Dust. She stood and brushed the dust from her clothes, and then with a deep sigh and pout she looked heavenward. “Why do you mock me?” She then turned and began her trek home.



He had been watching her unseen, undetected as he had every night since he had returned to Sunnydale. Close enough to make sure she was ok, but far enough as so she couldn’t pick up on his presence, he wasn’t ready for her to know he was back from Africa, wasn’t ready to face her after what had happened the last time they were together. After what he had done, killing what little trust they had between them.



He spent his nights, when he wasn’t watching her, working. With the fake credentials he had gotten from a shaman in Africa, he had gotten a job, a very legit and high paying job at the bank doing accounting work for the bank’s largest clients. A hidden talent he was never aware of, for in the two months he had been working, nightly at the bank, he had already gotten a raise, and was making enough money to get a nice townhouse apartment, as well as a new wardrobe, he was suddenly in need of. Plus he had already begun setting back a nice nest egg for rainy days.



~~~~~



[[She looked out over the blue-green sea. The breeze blowing through her hair, like her lover’s fingers, caressing her scalp. She closed her eyes and titled her head back, lifting it as so the sun could shine on her face. She took a deep breath, inhaling the many scents around her, and then smiled as strong arms wrapped around her waist. With a contented sigh she leaned back against the firm body behind her, moaning slightly when she felt her lover kissing her hair.



“I miss you,” She said in a near whisper, invoking a smile to her lover’s face.



“I’m right here,” He replied, leaning down to her ear, nipping at and kissing her lobe. “And I’ll never leave you, I love you.” She smiled broadly at these words.



“I love you too, Spike.”]]



She bolted up in her bed, her body glistening with sweat. With wide frighten eyes she scanned her room, searching for something, someone who wasn’t there.



“Oh God, no.”



~~~~



“Uhm…. that kind of sounds like the dream you use to have about Angel. You know… uhm…right after you sent him to hell.” Dawn said nervously, knowing it still was a sensitive spot with her older sister.



“That’s because it’s the same dream, except Angel’s not in, but,” She swallowed the lump that had suddenly formed in her throat before finishing. "Spike is.”



“So do you…love him I mean?” Dawn asked arching her brows as she did. Buffy replied by looking down at the table. “It…it’s ok if you do. Spike really does love you. And recent events excluded, he has done a lot of good stuff right?” Buffy looked up at her sister and smiled, knowing that this was her sister’s attempt at consoling. Buffy knew that Dawn was hurt and very mad at Spike’s actions, she just wasn’t sure which upset Dawn more, Spike attacking her or him leaving town.



“That’s exactly what Tara told me, when I told her about Spike and me.” Dawn perked up at this knowledge.



“Really?”



“Yeah,” Buffy said with a sad sigh.



“Then it must be true.” Dawn insisted as she stood and removed hers and Buffy’s breakfast plates from the table, placing them in the sink, and then turning back to face her sister. “And you really don’t have to be psychic to understand your Dream, Buffy.”



“Oh so ‘you’ understand it then.”



“Yep, and you even said it yourself in your dream… You miss him.”



~~~~



He had raced to get to the airport to get the package, and get it back to the bank before he shift ended. The package contained the will of a Billionaire who was on his deathbed, and was giving half of his fortune to charity and the rest to the Sunnydale bank, which was a bank he had originally started. William knew that if he didn’t get the documents into the bank ASAP, before the man died, that the man’s greedy family could contest the will, and so he raced through the airport, heading for the exit. Once he reached the doors he sighed some in relief.



“Ah Mr. Quartermaine you’re back, I’ll go get your car sir, I’ll only be a second.”



“Thank you, and there’s a hundred dollar bill in it for you if you can get it here even faster.” William stated putting a huge pep in the valet’s step, as he ran off to get the car. William stood nervously, tapping his foot and checking his watch, waiting. He suddenly felt the presence of eyes watching him, and he instinctively shot his head in the direction of his admirer.



“Spike?” A female voice called out to him.



~~~~



“Hey Buffster, where’s the Dawnster?” Xander asked as Buffy took a seat at the table where Xander and Anya were sitting at, silently glaring at one another.



“Yes, where is she. I mean the ‘only’ reason I came was because she insisted that we have a group hug type thing, and she made those big puppy dog eyes at me.” Anya stated as she popped a peanut in her mouth.



“Ah, sorry guys, Dawn told me to give you her apologizes, but she’s spending the night at Janice’s. I think she thought ‘we’ needed to spend some adult quality time with each other. ‘Adult’ being the operative word there.” Buffy said as she wearily looked from Xander to Anya, who in turn looked at each other, Xander longingly and Anya venomously.



“I can be adult.” Xander said.



“Yeah well, I can be a bigger adult.” Anya declared and Buffy rolled her eyes, now knowing that this was going to be a very long, un-fun night.



~~~~



William drove silently, keeping his eyes straight ahead, as if totally unaware of the woman sitting in his passenger seat. She in turn, did the same not knowing what to say. After a long moment however, she finally spoke.



“Nice car.” She said taking a moment to look around her.



“Thanks,” He replied still looking ahead of him.



“And…uhm…nice….uhm…clothes and…and hair. When did you…” She began to ask only to have him cut her off.



“It’s really a long story and I am too tired to tell it tonight.” He said more harshly then he had intended.



“Oh, sorry.” She said lowering her head and looking at her hands. He silently cursed himself for his behavior.



“No I’m sorry, Willow, that was very rude of me.” He said looking at her for the first time.



“You are?” She asked, baffled by his apology.



“Yes, Please forgive my manners, but as I said I am quite tired, which tends to make me somewhat of a grumpy bear.” She watched him with her mouth agape, wondering if she had been mistaken to think this man beside her was Spike. William looked at her, and burrowed his brow. “Now you’re being the rude one, what’s with the staring?”



“Oh I’m sorry it’s just…well you kind of sound funny, and you look so different, and yet it all seems vaguely familiar.” Willow said, as her eyes remained locked onto Spike/William.



“Well you are looking a bit different yourself.” William said hoping to change the subject. “I thought you went away to rest, yet you don’t look very rested.” Again Willow lowered her head.



“Kind of hard to rest with all the nightmares.”



“I can understand and relate to that.” He replied again focusing onto the road. “I’m sorry about Tara, she didn’t deserve to die, and definitely not so viciously. She was a special woman, always treated me decent, even when she probably shouldn’t have.”



“How did you…”



“The demon grapevine, there was talk of what was happening here in Sunnydale, all the way in Africa. Talk of the crazed Witch hell bent on revenge. I can’t say as I blame you, I probably would have done the same, or worse.” Willow smiled slightly at his understandings. Silence again fell between them for a short time.



“So you went to Africa? What was it like, what did you do?”



“Long story Will,”



“I’ve got time, since I really have no place to be…or go.” She mumbled the last part, totally in vain with a vampire sitting beside her.



“What do you mean, I’m sure your friends are throwing you a ‘welcome home we missed you Willow’ party as we speak.”



“Doubt it. “ Willow said laying her head back and peering up at the stars out the open sunroof. “You do know it’s kind of funny you having a sunroof, right?”



“Yes it’s full of irony and don’t change the subject. Why wouldn’t your pals miss you?”



“Oh…” She sighed sitting upright. “Let’s see, I killed Warren, skinned him alive to be more precise. I also drained and killed Rack, tired to turn Dawn back in to a ball of energy, Kicked Buffy’s ass all over the Magic box, and nearly killed Giles. So, as for a party, I’m thinking not so much. They didn’t even come pick me up from the airport, even though I called and left a message telling them I was back.”



“Whoa…” William replied stunned speechless.



“Yeah…whoa is me.”



“Well I can’t promise you I’ll be a very gracious host, but you’re welcome to come to my place…Uh…if you want.” William nervously offered, and Willow’s smile broadened.



“Yeah…thanks. So uhm…what were you doing in Africa?”



~~~~



The three forms sat at the table in the middle of the crowed bronze, watching as everyone around them dance and had what looked to be loads of fun.



“Ok, so are we done reconnecting?” Anya asked using her fingers to mimic the quotation marks. “Cause I have places to be.”



“Don’t you mean people to curse?” Xander asked sarcastically, and got a dangerous glare from Anya.



“No.”



“Oh so it’s your night off, you’re boss is a swell guy.” Xander continued to egg her on.



“God I wish I could curse you myself.” Anya spat out venomously, making Xander sorry he had upset the woman he still loved desperately.



“Come on guy, stop it.” Buffy finally jumped in. “We’re suppose to be bonding here, you know forgiving and forgetting type of…stuff.”



“I was the wronged party here.” Anya defended as Xander rolled his eyes.



“Oh here we go again.” He mumbled.



“I was left at the alter, the only one here that should be forgiving and forgetting is me, and I don’t want to…EVER!” She emphasized looking directly at Xander, who sighed heavily and looked down at his feet. “And I’m leaving. The next time you guys want to have a forgiveness meeting invite Willow, and leave me out of it. Besides, I think she needs forgiveness more then anybody.” Anya said as then stood and walked out. Buffy and Xander looked after her as she walked out of the Bronze.



“I miss Willow.” Buffy blurted out.



“Yeah, ditto.”



~~~~



“Oh wow…” Willow said now gulping at the wine William had given her as they now both sat around the fireplace, which was ablaze.



“You said that already.” William said smiling kindly at the woman before, feeling quite relieved to have finally told someone about all that had happened to him.



“I know, but it’s just…wow,” She repeated. “So you’re like Angel now?”



“Oh God no!” William exclaim looking very offended. “It’s not a curse, it’s something I wanted, something I sought out for. Angel and I are nothing alike, in fact the only thing we’ve ever had in common was…” He suddenly paused not wanted to say the name that went with the face that haunted his dreams every moment of every day.



“You both loved Buffy.” Willow finished for him, giving him a sweet yet sadden smile. His jaws clenched at the name, and then just as suddenly his features softened.



“I have a spare bedroom, you’re welcome to it for as long as you need it.” Willow’s smile broadened as did her eyes. “I know what it was like when I first came back, I kind of hid from the world for awhile, but after some time I’ve come out gotten a good job at the bank. Now I have a new life of sorts.”



“And Buffy?”



“Doesn’t know I’m back, I haven’t faced her or the others yet.” William said hanging his head a bit.



“Thanks Spi…William, for the ride, and a place to hide out…” Willow offered to change the subject she could see was paining him.



“For as long as you need.” William reiterated.



“Thanks, and thank you for telling me… trusting me with your soul, and don’t worry I won’t tell anyone. Not that I have anyone to tell anyway.”



“No worries, your friends still love you, and they will come around, just give them a chance.” He encouraged.



“You should take some of that advice too.” Willow said as they stood and moved to take their glasses into the kitchen.



“Doesn’t really apply to me, Will.”



“And why not, Will?” Willow teased with a giggle, which William matched with a chuckle.



“Because they never loved me to begin with,” He replied with downcast eyes and a sad smile, which Willow copied to her face. He took their glasses and placed them into the sink. “Come on let me show you your room, and feel free to re-decorate it if you like.”



“No, I won’t impose on you for too long…” He cut her off by facing her and staring at her sternly.



“I told you, you’re welcome here as long as you want. I’d like you to stay,” He said turning and walking down the hallway. “I’d like the company.” Willow smiled as she silently followed him.



~~~~



“So how’s the new School Dawnster?” Xander asked as he munched on the pancakes Buffy had made them. It had recently become a familiar scene in the Summer’s house, this new family unit that was Buffy, Dawn, and Xander, who had been coming over a lot more then her ever had.



“Ok I guess, not really different from the other high school, same faces.”



“Ah but the other high school wasn’t built by yours truly.” Xander said beaming with pride, causing Buffy and Dawn to chuckle at him. “And what about you Buffster, how the new job?”



“Well, pays great so are the hours, and I don’t smell like a slaughter house after work.” She said smiling. “So I love it.”



“Well I don’t,” Dawn said as she chewed on her sausage.



“Huh? Why not, I thought you’d like the fact that we are no longer struggling or on that Budget that wouldn't let us splurge.” Buffy stated with a confused look directed at her sibling.



“That’s not the bad part. The bad part comes from you, my sister, at my school at the same time as me.”



“Ahhh, it’s the typical ‘I’m embarrassed of my parent, and I don’t want them at my school while my friends are around’ syndrome. I know it well.” Xander stated with a chuckled.



“No,” Dawn interjected. “It’s the ‘I’m embarrassed by my parent, because she’s always coming up to me to fix my hair, or tell me about cleaning my room, and even spit washing my face, while my friends are around’ syndrome.” Dawn said with a glare shot at Buffy. Xander in turned looked to the slayer in disbelief.



“Please tell me you don’t do that.” Xander said.



“Well… only because I’m trying to help.” Buffy said as the stunned eyes remained on her. “Fine, I’ll stop embarrassing you, so long as you aren’t sloppy, and have done your chores, and cleaned your face.” Buffy said as she stood and took her plate to the sink. Dawn simply rolled her eyes and smiled at her sister despite herself.



“So, you guys ready, I have to get to the site a little early now that I’m the head foreman.” He said again beaming with pride.



“Ok, just let me get my book bag.” Dawn said as she headed for the stairs.



“And I need my briefcase…hehe…Briefcase, instead of Cow and Chicken hat, I love it.” Buffy said with a smile as she headed upstairs. Once in her room she grabbed her briefcase from her bed and then moved to her closet to get a sweater, for the principal kept the school freezing. She opened the closet door and searched around for the sweater to match her outfit. Her hands suddenly grabbed something Leathery, she pulled out the object, and a frown crept to her face. She swallowed hard as her bottom lip began to tremble. She lifted it to her nose and inhaled; it smelt of Nautica cologne, Cigarette smoke, and whiskey. Buffy could feel the tears threatening to fall.



“Hey, you ready?” Dawn called to her from the doorway, causing Buffy to Jump and throw the leather coat into the closet. She then wiped at her eyes before reaching in to grabbing the first sweater she saw, and then turning to face her sister.



“Yup,” Buffy answered as cheerfully as she could, but Dawn narrowed her eyes at her.



“Are you ok?”



“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” Buffy asked with a forced smile.



~~~~



“Hey you,” He said to the woman curled up on the couch. William had gone to do some shopping after he had gotten off work. He had made Willow make him a list of her favorite thing. He moved to the kitchen to put the away, and then he heard what sounded like muffled cries. He stopped what he was doing and moved back into the living room. He looked down at the form on the couch and his heart broke, he then turned his attention to the TV to see what had caused the downpour of tears, it was an old movie. William sat on the opposite end of the couch to where Willow lay curled up, crying. “What’s the matter luv?” He asked and then sat silently for her to reply.



“The Wizard of Oz?”



“Yeah, it’s my favorite, it was Tara’s favorite too.” William closed his eyes briefly and nodded as realization struck. “I miss her.” Willow stated her defenses completely crumbled. William moved to her and enveloped her in his arms, and she clung to him with all of her might, crying.



“Shhhh, don’t cry, please don’t cry.” William pleaded nervously. When his demon was in control he had never known what to do whenever a lady cried nor did he care most times, but now he was completely at a loss. “I know you miss her, I know it hurts, but it will get better.” He consoled as he gently rocked her back and forth. “You know what you need, you need to get out of this apartment for awhile.”



“But I don’t have anyplace to go.” Willow wheezed through her cries and sniffles.



“Sure you do, you can go anywhere you want. Just tell me and I’ll take you. Just please stop crying now, please.” Willow sat back a bit from his embrace as she wiped at her eyes and nose. “Just tell me what you need.”



“I know where I need to go.” Willow announced looking up at William with puffy red eyes, he simply nodded his reply.



~~~~



“Buffy! Come on we’re going to be late!” Dawn yelled up at her sister as she impatiently waited at the base of the stairs.



“Sorry, Dawnie,” Buffy said as she rushed down the stairs. “Ok let’s go.” Buffy and Dawn then made their way to the door. Suddenly Dawn turned back, leaving Buffy to look after her from the door, as the younger sibling disappeared into the kitchen.



“Can’t forget these. Think she’ll like them?”



“She’ll love them, but we can’t stay long, because is night a vamp’s favorite time to play, and I still have to drop you off at Janice’s and then patrol, remember?”



“Ok.” Dawn agreed as they walked out the door.



~~~~



Here Lies

Tara McClay

Born, November 1980

Died, May 2002



Willow stared at the tombstone her face a mask of disgust. William stood close behind her with grief-stricken eyes.



“That’s it?” Willow spoke and William wasn’t sure if she was addressing him or talking to herself, which he discovered just in the couple of weeks she’s stayed with him, was something she did a lot of.



“What’s that luv?” He asked taking a step closer to peer over her shoulder.



“That’s all they put on her gravestone, when she was born and when she died?”



“Looks like.”



“But that’s just so wrong. They didn’t say how wonderful and how beautiful she was. What a great friend, person she was. How having her in this world made it all brighter.” Willow said as fresh tears rolled from her eyes, and William placed his hands on her shoulder.



“There’s not enough room on that stone to even began to tell of Tara’s spirit.” William said in a vain attempt at consoling.



“Then there should be a bigger stone.” She said looking back up at him with pleading eyes, and he could only bow his head.



“Willow?” A soft voice called out and Willow’s face turned to see who had spoke it, while William stood frozen for he knew who the voice belonged to. “Willow is that you?”



“Hello Buffy,” Willow said as she walked towards the woman who now stood before her and the younger girl who stood close behind. “Dawnie.” Willow addressed the girl with a small smile, but only got an icy glare in return.



“Don’t call me that.” Dawn said through gritted teeth, and Willow became aware that the youngest Summers girl had not yet forgiven her.



“Ah, when…when did you get back, why didn’t you call?” Buffy asked hoping to dispel the growing tension.



“For a couple of weeks now, and...ah…I did call from the airport, needed a ride, but I guess you didn’t get the message.” Buffy frowned in confusion and then turned to Dawn who folded her arms across her chest and looked away. It was clear now that the message had been erased.



“Sorry,” Buffy apologized.



“It’s ok, William was there and he gave me a ride, and I’ve been staying with him since I got back.” Willow announced nonchalantly without much thought.



“William?” Buffy questioned and an intrigued Dawn turned her attention back. Willow’s face paled as realization struck that she had just spilled something that she knew William wasn’t ready for.



“Ah, Oh, Uhm…” Willow stammered, and then William saved her.



“Hello Buffy.” William turned and spoke softly and both Buffy and Dawn’s eyes widened at the man, who they hadn’t noticed standing there. Buffy’s mouth and throat grew dry and swallowed down the lump that had formed there, and tried to keep her lips from trembling.



“Spike?” Buffy finally spoke baffled not only by his new appearance but also by the fact that Willow had called him William.



“You’ve been with Spike, this whole time? What has he turned you?” Dawn asked getting more upset by the second not at all happy to see her once favorite vampire, which he painfully too note of.



“No, it’s not like that.” Willow defended as Buffy and William remained silent, eyes locked onto each other’s.



“It makes sense, evil things do tend to stick together.” Dawn spat out and both Willow and William looked as if the air had been kicked from their bodies.



“Dawn, that’s enough.” Buffy interjected.



“No, it’s not, and why are you defending them. Spike tried to rape you and Willow tried to kill you, she tried to kill me, and the whole world, or have you forgotten.”



“No, I haven’t but you know that’s why she went away to get better.” Buffy spoke only to be cut off again by her sister.



“Oh yeah and she looks so much better, hanging out with Spike. You shouldn’t have come here, you don’t belong here.” Dawn declared and Willow looked confused for a moment. “She knew what you were capable of, how dark and dangerous your magic was, that’s why she left you.” Willow gasped as she now understood what Dawn was telling her, and her tears poured down her face. William’s face contorted with anger. “And you disrespect her by coming here after what you tried to do.”



“Dawn that’s enough!” Buffy hissed.



“No! It’s not enough and it never will be enough, not to make up for what she did, what she tried to do.”



“I’m sorry.” Willow said weakly as her face fell along with her tears. “I’m so sorry.”



“Like I said, that’s not enough.” Dawn continue just as William stepped up in between Willow and Buffy.



“Yes it bloody well is, enough.” He said in a near growl, causing both Buffy and Dawn to take a couple of steps back. “It’s not the time nor place bit. You should show respect, if not for Willow or me, then for Tara. She forgave Willow, she loved Willow, and just because you’re pissed at her and me, that doesn’t give you the right to belittle that love.”



“What do you know about love?” Dawn continued defiantly. “You don’t hurt the people you love, you don’t try to rape the woman you say you love, nor sleep with her friends. That’s not love.” William simply glared at the girl before him, now wondering where the child he had loved and cared for had gone.



“Well, I guess cold-heart bitchiness is genetic.” He said coldly and then turned his back to the two girls to address Willow, and Buffy gulped back impending tears at his words, which she knew had been directed at her as well. “You ready to leave luv? We can come back later when it’s less crowded.” Willow who was completely broken, simply nodded her head and leaned into William’s awaiting arms.



“Willow, you can’t stay with Spike. You should come home with us.” Buffy offered.



“No she shouldn’t.” Dawn quickly interjected.



“Dawn please.” Buffy shot her sister a look and Dawn clamped her lips closed. “Will, it’s not safe to be with Spike, you know that.” Buffy said avoiding the eyes of the man she now spoke about.



“No, it’s ok. William won’t hurt me, he hasn’t even tried to hurt me, besides he has a soul now and he still has the chip so he can’t, and…oops.” Willow said as she looked up at William apologetically. Buffy and Dawn’s mouth’s dropped and they looked at the man stunned.



“Oh boy.” Dawn said rolling her eyes upward a bit.



“Who, huh, what?” Buffy babbled as she continued to eye the man, who now that she looked, seemed like a complete stranger to her. Not only his clothes and hair was different, but his entire demeanor.



“I’m sorry Will, I know you wanted to tell them in your own time.” Willow said and William gave her a smirk.



“It’s ok luv, it doesn’t really matter anymore.” William said. “Come on let’s get you home.” He then led Willow off, leaving Buffy and Dawn still in a stunned state.



~~~~



“Wait, Willow’s back and with Spike?” Xander asked trying to make sense of the story Buffy and Dawn were telling, they nodded. “Why didn’t you stop her, is she crazy. She can’t stay with Spike it’s not safe.”



“Sure it is he’s still got that chip.” Anya offered as she sat at the table leafing through a magazine. She had once again reluctantly decided to join the others in a ‘meeting’ this time at the local coffee shop. “And now that he has a soul, I’m sure he won’t hurt Willow.”



“What?” Xander exclaimed as he looked at his former fiancée as if she had grown another head.



“You knew Spike had a soul?” Buffy question the newly reenlisted demon. “And you didn’t tell m… us?”



“No, why would I?” Anya asked now looking at Buffy curiously. “Besides I didn’t think you’d care.”



“I don’t” Buffy spat out quickly.



“Wait, Spike is now soul boy jr.” Xander asked hoping to clarify, and Anya, Buffy, and Dawn all nodded their heads. “Oh boy!” He said rolling his eyes a bit.



“What’s with the ‘oh boy’s’ first Dawn now you.” Buffy demanded.



“Well, Buffy you have a thing for vampires, just admit it, you do. And especially the ones with souls.” Dawn stated. “And you and Spike had a thing before, and you even said yourself it was over because he was a ‘soulless demon’, who couldn’t be trusted, but now he’s got a soul, all of your defenses and excuses are gone.”



“Yeah, and we’ve already been there and done that with you and loving the soulful vampire.” Xander threw in. “And please tell me we’re not going there again.”



“No, It doesn’t change anything. Spike is not Angel.” Buffy said, trying to convince herself more that anyone else.



“No, and he might not even love you.” Anya interjected never taking her eyes from the magazine she was now reading.



“What are you talking about, Spike loves Buffy.” Dawn stated in defense of her sister.



“Yeah in a very obsessive, stalker, rapist kind of way.” Xander threw in sarcastically, causing all the women at the table to glared and then roll their eyes at him.



“Yes, Spike did love you Buffy,” Anya said with a huff, rolling her eyes as she now looked to the others, suddenly quite annoyed by their presence. “I was referring to William. It’s no longer Spike we’re talking about here, but the soul of the man he use to be. Maybe ‘William’ doesn’t love you.”



“Oh.” Buffy said as she stared off into space.



~~~~



“Hey, I made you some hot chocolate.” William said from the doorway, looking in on Willow who sat on her bed, still wet from her long hot bath, which he had drawn for her. “Even put little marshmallows in it.” He added and Willow threw him a small yet sweet smile.



“Thanks.” She replied and taking that as an invitation William moved further into the room, setting the cup on the bedside table.



“You know you can’t keep sulking like this. Dawn didn’t mean that gibberish she was spouting, Lil bit is just pissed right now, but she’ll get over it.”



“No, she meant it and she was right. I didn’t…I don’t belong. I was stupid to think I could just come back and everything would be the way it was. It never can be again, because of what I did.”



“That’s not…” William began to defend her but saw the look she was giving him, and thought better of it. “Ok maybe some of that is true, but they’re your friends, your family and they will forgive you, maybe not a soon as you would like them too, but in time. Buffy I think already has, she offered for you to move back into her place didn’t she?”



“Will, that was only because she didn’t want me here with you.”



“So I gathered.” William said as his head ached in remembrance of Buffy’s cold words.



“And believe me it had nothing to do with my safety.” Willow stated as if reading his thoughts. “Ever since that whole thing with Anya, even though she never came out and said it, Buffy developed trust issues when it came to you and her friends, those of the female persuasion that is.” This bit of knowledge suddenly intrigued William. “She was hurt and very jealous.”



“Nice try at changing the subject, luv, but this isn’t about me and Buffy.” William said as he folded his arms across his chest and smirked at Willow. “That’s water under the bridge.”



“Really, so just like that you got over Buffy? I wish I could that so easily.”



“It’s not a matter of ‘getting over her’ but simply understanding that I can’t change what happened between us, God know I wish I could, but I can’t. I’ve learned to live in the moment, and look to the future, not dwell on the past. I did too much of that that first month after I first got my soul back, and it drove me crazy.”



“Really?” Willow asked as she looked up at him wanting to hear the whole story.



“Yeah, but I got through it and you’ll get through this, I promise you will.”



“I wouldn’t have gotten as far as I have if it hadn’t been for you Will. Thank you.” He rolled his eyes at her, now uncomfortable, still unable to take a compliment. “I mean that, you’ve made me feel welcome and gave me friendship when I didn’t think I had nor deserved it.”



“We all make mistake, and I know because I’m the King of mistakes, and I’ve done many things I’m now ashamed of, and want more than anything to take back, but I can’t. All I can do now is learn and try to do better. I don’t want all those lives I’ve taken, all their deaths to be in vain, not anymore. Now, I have to go out for a bit, some business I have to take care of. There’s a couple of boxes on the couch, they're for you, you’ll know what to do with them, and I expect you to be ready when I get back.”



“Get ready, for what?” Willow asked her brows arched as she regarded the vampire now leaving th room.



“We’re going out.” He said as he disappeared around a corner.

“Watcha thinking about?” Dawn asked as she and Buffy walked home after leaving the theater on their Thursday movie night.



“Mmmm…nothing much.”



“Uh, ha.”



“What?” Buffy asked with a half smile as she now looked to her sister.



“You wouldn’t be thinking about the newly souled vampire in town are you?”



“What, no!” Buffy said shaking her head vigorously.



“Uh, ha.” Dawn said again.



“Ok, I’ll admit I am curious to learn how and when, but...but that’s all.”



“Good, cause I so don’t want a repeat of you and Angel.”



“I thought we’ve already established that Spike or William, whatever,” Buffy said rolling her eyes. “He’s ‘not’ Angel. And since when did you become the president of the ‘I hate Spike’ club?”



“Well, he attacked you, he tried to rape you.” Dawn answered.



“Dawnie, it’s really not as simple as Xander made it out to be. What Spike did was wrong, but it was no worst then what I had been doing to him. It took me a while to figure that out.”



“What are you saying, you raped him?”



“Having a sexual connection with him by forceful means,” The scene of Buffy throwing Spike against the wall in the abandoned house, and then throwing herself upon him, flashed inside Buffy’s head as she spoke. “Being violent and abusive towards him,” Another scene of Buffy attacking Spike in his crypt when she was invisible, and then beating him down outside the police station now plundered her mind. “Yeah I supposed in a way, I did rape him. I gave as good as I got, even worse, I used him. I knew how he felt about me and I used it to get what I wanted, not caring if it hurt him.” Buffy said as she looked down at her feet and both she and Dawn walked on in silence.



“So you’re saying that if I’m going to be mad with Spike for what he did, I have to be equally mad at you, more so even?” Dawn asked never looking up at her sister.



“Yup.” Buffy replied. “Now you’ll just have to settle for being mad at him because he left.” Buffy threw in and Dawn quickly looked up at her.



“I’m not mad because…” Dawn didn’t bother finishing once she saw the look on Buffy’s face. “It doesn’t matter now anyway, he’s back.”



“Yeah, and we don’t know for how long, or if he was ever gonna let us know, and that’s pissing you off even more isn’t it?” Buffy knowingly asked her sister, who in turned hung her head lower. Dawn then looked about hoping the subject would change and then she spotted her new topic.



“Sooo, you’re saying you’re not mad at Spike, that he’s now out of you system?” Dawn asked still eyeing the object that had caught her eyes.



“Absolutely. Soooo over it.” Buffy stated.



“So it wouldn’t bother you, if say Spike started seeing someone else.” Buffy burrowed her brow at the thought and then looked up at her sister.



“Huh?” her eyes then followed to where Dawn stood pointing. They landed on the window of Rene’s Bistro, one of the few pricey restaurants in town, and there sat and elegantly dressed Willow and Spike, eating and laughing as they held a conversation. Buffy stilled the tears that begged to fall from her eyes and willed herself not to go in and beat the crap out of both Spike and Willow.



“No, doesn’t bother me at all. Now let’s get you home so I can go patrol.” Buffy said as she turned and hurried down the street, feeling a sudden need to kill something.



~~~~



He had finally mustered the courage to step up on the porch, he had circled the street twelve times already, thinking on how he would go about seeing her and telling her what he needed her to know. Taking a deep unneeded breath, he knocked on the door.



“Coming!” A feminine voice called out, and he felt like turning and running away before she got to the door, but he had long since lost control over his legs, which stayed rooted to their spot. The door hurriedly swung open, and he sheepishly looked down into the woman’s face, which he noticed had instantly paled.



“Hello Buffy.” William said softly, with a nod.



“S…Spike, what are…” He cut her off, shoving a sheet of paper at her.



“Just came by to give you this.” Buffy warily took the paper and began reading over it. “It’s my address,” Buffy now looked up at him questioningly. “For Willow!” William went about explaining. “So you know where she is and if you need to see her, want to go see her, now you can. I sleep all day, and I work at the bank all evening into the night, so you don’t have to worry about me being around, and I’ll give a spare key with Joe, the doorman. Just give him your name and he’ll give you the key. You should stop by to see her. She really needs…Just stop by and see her sometime, just you. I don’t think she’s up for a re-match with Dawn just yet, and she still doesn’t want to see Xander, so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t let them know where she is.”



“I will…I mean I won’t tell anyone, and I will come see her, of course.” Buffy stammered over her words. “Thanks.” She added as she now gawked at him, which made him uncomfortable. “Your hair…” She began as he lifted his hand to his hair and raked his fingers through the soft brown curls. “It…you look nice as a brunette.” She finally said dropping her eyes as she did. “Never thought I ever see the day.” She said with a soft chuckle, which he matched with one of his own.



“Yeah, well it’s damned hard to find bleach in the middle of the desert, in Africa. And I was kind of crazy at the time, so wasn’t really caring much.” Buffy arched her brow to this news.




“Crazy?”



“Yeah but I guess the words more fitting would be ‘guilt ridden’. With this soul came a bloody conscience, and let me tell you it had a lot to say to me.” William said with a smile.



“Why did you do it?” She asked and William froze. There it was the question he had been preparing himself to answer for months. A question he had about a million replies to, yet none he could think of at the moment. So he settled for the usual reply.



“Long story, and I don’t want to bore you with the details. Beside I need to get back to Will, don’t like leaving her alone for too long.”



“Why, she’s not doing something like hurting her self, or…” Buffy asked with eyes filled with fear.



“No! No, nothing like that, she just starts alphabetizing and color coordinating everything. Yesterday it was my underwear drawer.” Buffy giggled at that, wondering when He had started wearing them. “Well, I better go. Good night Buffy.” William said as began to turn to leave.



“Good Night Spik..uh...William.” He shot her a look and nod over his shoulder before walking off the porch and to his black 2002 Oldsmobile Intrigue, with the sunroof.



~~~~



“She’s alone, do you want me…”



“No, the time is not right, and it has to be just right. This time tomorrow the witch will pay for her rape of the craft.”



“Shall we strip her of her powers?”



“Yes and of her life.”



~~~~



“Will, you have to get up now, it’s too late to be sleeping.” A voice spoke to Willow and she lifted her head from her pillow and stared into the face of the woman she had dreamed of for months now.



“Tara?” Willow spoke as she sprang from the bed and advanced on the figure before her, only to be knocked back before she could get too close.



“I’m sorry Will, but I am as you’ve made me, and I came to tell you that you have to wake up.”



“But I don’t want to, I want to stay here with you.” Willow said now chocking on her tears. “Tara, please, why can’t I hold you?”



“Why?” Tara asked with a smile on her face, causing Willow to look at her confused.



“I don’t understand.”



“Then I can’t explain it.” Tara replied still smiling and staring lovingly. “Will, you know a storm is coming? You have to close the window.” Willow turned her gaze towards her bedroom window, only to find a clear blue sky that housed a blazing sun. “Close the window Will, before it’s too late.”



“I don’t understand.” Willow said as she turned back only to find the room empty. “Tara! Come back, Tara Please!” Willow wailed. “Tara!!” She cried as her body violently began to shake.



“Willow!” William yelled at the paled woman who was soaking wet from her own sweat, and screaming at the top of her lungs. He shook her fiercely. “Willow, wake up!” She slowly opened her eyes and looked wildly about the room.



“Tara?” She moaned still looking for the woman who haunted her dreams.



“No, Luv. Tara’s no here, she’s dead, remember?”



“But she was here, she was right there, but I couldn’t touch her. Why couldn’t I touch her?” Willow asked as she looked sown at her hands as if they had offended and betrayed her. “She told me a storm was coming and That I had to shut the window.” Willow frowned a bit, thinking.



“Do you know what she meant by it?” He asked sure that there was a meaning, Willow just shook her head and softly cried. William pulled her closer to him for comfort. “Shhh, it’s ok we’ll figure it out…shhhh.” He cooed as he gently rocked her.



~~~~



“So, do you have any idea what it means. I wouldn’t have called if I didn’t think there was something to it.”



“No, Spike I’m glad you called. Although I’m still not sure why it’s you calling me and not Buffy,”



“Well Willow’s been staying with me since she got back to town, still not ready to face her friends.” William explained.



“I see...uhm...well you were right to call. Willow’s dream does seem to fit the reports I’ve been getting about a small coven of witches and warlocks. I think they have a bounty out on Willow.”



“Why?”



“Retribution of sorts.” Giles said and William knowingly nodded his head.



“That’s the thing about magic, there are always consequences, always.”



“Yes, well this time it seems that it’s Willow’s life at stake. I’ll call Buffy and update her, since I’m assuming you haven’t done so.”



“No.”



“And I’ll be on the next flight back to Sunnydale, you just keep Willow someplace safe.”



“She’s safe, I have a spell over my place no magic can be done within.”



“Good, good…ah...I had better start making plans, and thanks again for calling me Spike, I’ll be seeing you soon.”



“Right.” With that both men hung up the phone.



~~~~



“I just don’t get it how will killing Willow change anything. “ Xander asked from his spot of the couch in Buffy’s living room. He , Buffy, Dawn and Anya sat waiting for Willow, William, and Giles to arrive. William had volunteered to pick Giles up from the airport, since he lived the closest and had the better suited car. “It just doesn’t make sense.”



“It makes about as much sense as what Willow did that got her into this mess to begin with.” Anya stated. “An eye for an eye, they are going to do to her what she did when she abused magic.”



“And you know this how?” Buffy inquired.



“There’s been talk about it for months now in the demon world. Many are for this simply because they now know that Willow has great powers still within her. And they don’t think that one being should possess such power, I tend to agree. Simply because well the whole ending of the world part.” Anya continued.



“Wait you’ve known about this for months and you never said anything?” Buffy asked dumbfounded.



“You didn’t ask, and besides Willow’s known for months I figured if she didn’t tell you herself, it’s not my place to.”



“How did Willow find out?” Xander asked.



“Well his coven is a very politically fair type, they send out notices informing the tended victim of their plans.”



“Now that’s just twisted.” Dawn finally spoke.



“No, they think of it as giving the person time to get their affairs in order.” Anya said.



“Remind us again, just whose side you’re on An.” Xander said to her , and she threw back a glare.



“I am a Demon Xander, thanks to you…” She mumbled the last part, but everyone still heard her. “There are things in my world that are not meant to be known by mortals. My being here with you now is not agreeable to most of my demon friends but yet I’m here, trying to help you all once again.”



“And we appreciate it Anya.” Buffy quickly interjected, fearing Anya would leave. “Really.” Anya calmed down a bit, rolling her eyes from Xander to where Buffy now sat.



“Well, I’m doing for Willow, and that’s all.” Anya insisted.



“Since when have you and Willow been so close, you two have never really like each other, always having a tug-o-war over Xander.” Dawn said causing Buffy to give her a wide-eyed glare.



“And ii seems I lost. I realized how stupid I was, being jealous, Willow knew what was best for Xander, she was always trying to tell me, but I thought I knew what was best, I was wrong and she was right. I should have listened to her and then I wouldn’t be in this mess now.”



“What…you’re saying you wouldn’t have dumped me, became a vengeance demon again, and then slept with Spike.” Xander asked hopefully, and Anya burrowed her brow at him.



“No, I mean I would have done it all a lot sooner, instead of wasting my time with you for so long.” She said and Xander heart crumbled along with is spirit. Dawn noticed that Buffy too looked hurt by Anya’s word, and then it occurred to her that it was the statement about Spike that had done it. This angered Dawn to spoke out.



“So you’re saying you still would have slept with Spike, knowing he and Buffy were kind of together.” Buffy looked up, stunned, at her sister but she remained silent for she really wanted to know the answer herself, as did Xander as all their eyes now fell on Anya.



“Well of course not, if I had known which I didn’t. Although I should have since, as I now recall, the woman Spike spent that whole evening talking about, cursing at, and spouting words of love for, does sound a lot like you.” Anya directed to Buffy. “But I didn’t know at the time, God I never would have even thought it possible what with the way you treated him, putting him down all the time and beating him up viciously…”



“An!” Xander jumped in knowing that the topic wasn’t good for Buffy.



“What?” Anya yelled back at him.



“This is not helping the problem at hand.” Xander pointed out.



“Well she asked.” Anya stated pointing to where Dawn stood with her arms folded. At that moment th front door opened and Giles walked in carrying his luggage and an armful of bag, which Dawn who rushed to him, figured were presents.



“Giles!” Dawn exclaimed as she reached for the bags contains ‘her’ gifts.



“Ah, hello Dawn,” He then looked about the room at the sad faces that belonged to Xander, Anya, and Buffy. And he instinctively got scared. “What happened, did someone else die?” Buffy stood and smiled a bit at him.



“No, just a very intense Scooby meeting, as we have mature so has the topics.” Buffy assured as she gave Giles a hug and grabbed one of his luggage. She then looked around questioningly. “Ah, where’s Will, OI thought she was coming, and…and Spike…”



“Their outside, I think Spike’s trying to convince Willow to come in.” Giles said as he moved to put his luggage in the hall closet.



“Oh,” Buffy said a she moved up along side Dawn, who now shamelessly peered out the window to the walkway where Willow and William now stood, talking intimately, or so it looked to Buffy.



~~~~



“I can’t,” She said trying to turn and walk back to the car, But he held her firmly.



“Yes you can, you have to, their trying to save your life, luv. Now if that doesn’t tell you that they still care then nothing will.”



“But I’ve hurt everyone in that house, I tried to kill them and…”



“And they still want to help you, they understand that you were hurting Willow. Losing Tara was unbearable for you, they know that. They themselves had to deal with losing her as well, remember.” Willow silently nodded as she looked up at him. “So you gonna be my brave girl and go inside, you knew this night was coming, it’s just happening sooner then you wanted it to, but it can’t be help. There is a coven of bad Wicca’s out there somewhere and they want your head, now we all have to come together to stop them.”



“Maybe we shouldn’t stop them.” Willow said in a whisper, knowing it was in vain being that Spike was a vampire.



“Don’t say that, don’t even think it, you hear me.” He said giving her a firm shake. “We all make mistake, trust me on this I know. Sometimes we do thing under normal circumstances we never would have dream possible. But grieve over losing someone we loved can make us go out of our head, make us think that death is the only way to end the hurt. I know that’s how I became a vampire.” Willow looked to him stunned for a moment and then she wiped at her eyes and sniffed back her tears, raising her chin a bit.



“Ok I’m ready.” She said and William smiled at her amorously.



“That’s my girl.” William said as he led Willow up the walkway and onto the porch, but before they could knocked the front door flew open and Buffy stood there.



“Hey Will and...uh…Will.” She said with a forced smile, which she hoped would cover up her tears of happiness at seeing her friend and her pangs of Jealously at seeing her friend in the comforting arms of her former lover.



“Hello Buffy,” Willow said and William simply threw her a nod of his head.



“Come in, everyone’s here, ready to hit the books and find out about this new big bad.” Buffy said cheerily as she stood aside to let them in. Willow moved forward, her hand firmed grasping William’s, but he stood still just outside the doorframe. When she felt his resistance, Willow turned back to face him, with questioning eyes.



“I’ll come back in a couple of hours, or better yet you can just call me when you’re ready.” William said with a supportive smile and Willow’s eyes widened with fear.



“You’re not staying, I thought you would be here,” She then turned to Buffy. “I thought it was ok that he would be here.” Buffy who herself was a little taken aback by Spike’s statement, stood silent a moment.



“It is…I mean If you want to stay Spik…William it’s ok. I’m sure we can use your expertise.” Buffy said.



“See it’s ok.” Willow said turning back to her new friend, the one person she had found her self totally dependent on for weeks now. William simply shook his head.



“No, you need this time with your friends…”



“You’re my friend.” Willow quickly added and the statement warmed William’s heart and he smiled warmly at her, giving her hand a gentle squeeze.



“You know what I mean, and besides I have to work. I couldn’t get out of it. So when you’re ready you just call me, you have the cell phone I bought you, right?” Willow nodded but never let go of his hand. “Ok, you go on then and let me know the second you guys find anything,’ He said looking up at Buffy who in turn nodded her head to him. Willow didn’t move and William leaned down a bit until they were eye to eye. “You know I have a lot of paper work that I have to type up, I’m kind of gonna need that.” He said with a smirk and Willow found herself giggle despite how she didn’t want to let his hand go, but she did. “That’s my girl.” William said with a wink, and Buffy felt her heart clench at his words, but she remain silent and waited until Willow turned to her and moved through the door, looking over her should once for another reassuring nudge, which William gave. “Just call me when you need me, and I’ll come running.” With that he turned and made his way back to his car. Buffy stared after him for a second before closing the door.



~~~~



“She is with her friends, they are planning a way to stop us.”



“Let them, for nothing will stop what is coming, nothing will appease it except the witch’s blood.”



“So we wait?”



“Yes, until she’s alone, I don’t want any innocents caught in the middle, only her.”



~~~~



“Well according to the card they were so nice to send to you, informing you of your impending death, they are going to summon a trigillian demon, and I can’t believe you didn’t tell us about the sooner Willow.” Giles said as he and the others sat around the living room researching.



“Honestly didn’t think you’d care.” She said in a childlike whisper.



“Well of course we care,” Giles stated looking to the others for support but only getting downcast eyes. “Uh…and if not us you should have at least told Spike.”



“No I could do that either.”



“Why you think he would have told us, I don’t think he would have if you asked him not to, but he probably could have…” Buffy began only to have Willow cut her off.



“He would have went out half cocked looking for it, trying to kill it to protect me, and probably would have gotten himself killed, and I wasn’t going to allow that.”



“Why not,” Xander asked from his spot on the floor, and then suddenly his eyes grew large. “Oh God don’t tell me you have a thing for Spike too.” Xander asked only to have the others in the room look at him in disgust.



“No, what William and I have is friendship, nothing else, but I don’t expect you to understand it, nor do I care if you do.” Willow said growing madder by the second. “You know he’s really been there for me for nearly a month now, and I don’t think…no I know I wouldn’t have made it without his support. He’s been a true friend.”



“We’re your friends too Will.” Buffy added.



“Well not lately,” Willow said and all eyes in the room fell to the spoken truth, they hadn’t really been there for Willow after what had happened the previous summer, after what she had done to them. “And I know that it’s my own fault, I’m not blaming any of you. I’m just trying to say that, William isn’t the same anymore he’s changed, and I’m not speaking about having a soul, this change occur a couple of years ago, I’m just now seeing it, since I’ve gotten to know him better. And I can’t let you sit here and put him down, not after all he’s done for me, I just can’t. So, I’m just going to go out back for some air, and give you time to get it all out of your system before I get back, ok.” She then stood and made her way to the kitchen and out the back door.



“What is it with you women and Spike?” Xander questioned not really wanting nor expecting and answer. “Is it the accent?” After a long pause Anya spoke.



“Well for me it was his striking good looks, tight, muscular body, also the mind blowing sex…Oh and he smells really good.” Anya announced as everyone stared at her in disbelief. Aware of the eyes on her she became uncomfortable. “That was one of those rhetorical question wasn’t it?” They all nodded their heads. “Well then never mind.”



“Back to this demon,” Giles interjected wanted to immediately change the subject, but Buffy and the others were just yet.



“The sex was…mind blowing?” Buffy asked with a sudden dry mouth.



“Yes, wasn’t it for you?” Anya now asked, but Buffy quickly avoided not wanting to admit it was, the best she had ever had in fact, and that she thought it was something special, just for her. It hurt having to share it with Anya.



“Ahhh…I better go check on Willow.” She said hurriedly standing and following Willow’s earlier trek. The remaining four sat silently. Anya regarded Xander and by the tight mask now on his face she could tell she had succeeded in hurting him with her words, which was her intent although every word she had said was the truth. Yet it just wasn’t as satisfying as she had thought and hoped it would be. Before she could think on it anymore Buffy rushed back into the room.



“Willow’s gone, and judging by all the footprints out back, I’d say she wasn’t alone.”



“They’ve grabbed her,” Giles said more as a statement then a question. “We better get Spike.”



“But we still don’t clearly know how to stop them, this demon they’ve called. We need to research some more.” Xander stated the obvious.



“Right, then I’ll go get Spike you guys stay and keep looking. I have my cell call if you find anything. Spike and I will hit the streets and try to locate Will.” Buffy said before rushing out the door.



~~~~



“You have nothing to say?” A voice in the darkness spoke.



“You were so eager to destroy us all not so long ago, and for what, because you lost someone you loved.” Another voice spoke. “We’ve all lost someone we loved, but we never abused the craft to change it. Death is apart of the natural order of life, and it shouldn’t be messed with, but you, you did it twice.” Willow looked confused for a moment before she realized they were referring to bringing back Buffy and then trying to bring back Tara, and then trying to destroy the world. “Now little Wicca you will have to pay for your actions.”



“I know,” Willow said in a near whimper. “And I accept my fate for what I have done.”



“Good, then it will be less painful for you.”



~~~~



“What did you lot say to upset her?” William asked as he and Buffy rushed down the streets, taking the back alleys mostly.



“Xander,” Buffy began and William rolled his eyes and huffed. “He was attacking you and Willow kind of got upset.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, she really thinks of you as a friend, says she couldn’t have made it without your support.” William smiled a little at this knowledge.



“Well, I can say the feeling is mutual. She was my pillar of support, she kept me sane.”



“Having that soul and with the memories of what you had done, it was hard?” Buffy asked as they continued down a dark alleyway, just as sprinkles of rain began to drop, and William silent cursed himself for not driving.



“Not so much the memories. At first I didn’t know where I was or how I had gotten there, but then they started coming around, some were kind but most were taunting.”



“Who?” Buffy asked curiously now looking and the vampire beside, who now stared off as if in a trance. The rain began falling with more force, and their hair was growing very wet.



“My victims, all the men and woman I killed. So many of them, so many.” Buffy dropped her eyes to the ground.



“I’m sorry.” She mumbled.



“Don’t be, I killed them, this demon inside me, had killed them and enjoyed it at the time, they had every right to want retribution.” William said looking to her, both now thoroughly soaked. “You were there as well.” He stated in a low voice, but Buffy heard it and looked to him with wide eyes. “You were there constantly, seeing you I think drove me mad. Than finally it stopped, they all went away, once I accepted what had been done to them with my hands, and I forgave myself for it. I knew I couldn’t bring them back, but I swore to them that I would change I would no longer allow my demon to harm anyone, and that I would help who I could. That seemed to please them and they all went away. All except you.” He stopped and looked down at her as she stood holding her coat tightly wrapped around her body. “I didn’t know how to get rid of you, you weren’t dead like the others, but yet in still you were my demon’s victim, the worst of all. See he hurt you, probably in the worst way you can hurt a person, and sure he had done it before, far worse then what he tried to do to you. Difference is he loved you, he did that to you even though he loved you,” He looked down at his hands with disgust, as if they were covered with something vile. Buffy watched him closely, her tears falling, and she was glad that is was raining so they would be covered up. William too cried though he didn’t really care to hide it, as he sniffled and his shoulders gently shook. “That’s when I realized it was him, my demon that was manifesting you. He wouldn’t let you go, he couldn’t. He hurt, he ached for you. This made me all the more miserable.”



“I’m sorry, you must hate me.” Buffy said looking down as the rain-washed away her fresh tears. William regarded her in wonderment. “This is kind of like Angel/Angelus, but in reverse,” She said with a chuckle. Her words truly intrigued William now. “Angel’s human soul loved me, but his demon hated me, with a passion.” William titled his head to the side as he looked at her.



“How exactly is this situation like that?” William asked, arching his brow. Buffy now looked up to him with curious and confused eyes. “I love you with my demon heart and my human soul, that’s why seeing you drove me mad. That why being near you now is so hard, because though I long to I can never touch you, not again. Thus the irony that is my life; my demon left you out of guilt for what he had done to you. He went to go get a soul, so he could give you what he thought you needed.”



“Which is.” Buffy asked.



“To be rid of him, and he figured with his human soul back he could forget you, and never come back here. He never counted on me loving you desperately.” William said with a sad chuckle, and Buffy’s heart skipped. “He couldn’t see that because of you I was created, because he loved you he had grown some what of a conscience and a soul, even before it was fully restored. That’s why he hadn’t been able to harm anyone for over two years now. And no it wasn’t the chip that stopped ‘him’ from killing, but not from getting his minions to do it for him. Spike could have been his same evil self, except he didn’t want you to hate him, I know because I was there, I was the reason it hurt so much when you rejected him, why he cried when you died. Now I’m the reason he will never touch you again, because I know that you are right, I can see that now.”



“Right about what?” Buffy asked through her own sniffles.



“You can’t love me.” At that moment a loud ring cut through the silence, causing both Buffy and William to jump a little. Buffy then pulled her sell phone from her pocket.



“Hello?” She slightly yelled over the now hard down pour of rain.



“Ah Buffy, good, we found more information on the demon that’s after Willow. It seems the demon itself it just a tool, that it’s not going to do any harm to Willow, but instead it will be Willow’s decision.” Buffy burrowed her brow and scrunched up her face to this news.



“What?”



“A Trigillian demon’s purpose is to cause hallucinations, but only to it’s intended victim. It will make Willow see the faces of all of her victims, us included, taunting her. Until they drive her insane, but she can end it with her blood, her life essences.”



“So what you’re saying is she’ll have a choice, she either goes crazy or dies?” William now looked to Buffy with concern. “And there’s no other way to stop is, beside her blood. Can you say Déjà vu?”



“Ah…yes, we too noticed the similarities, will you be ok?” Giles asked.



“Sure, this time me dying isn’t really an option.” Buffy said. Giles smiled despite himself.



“No I suppose not, but be careful, Spike’s with you?”



“Yes, William’s here with me, and we’ll be safe. You guys keep looking for any loopholes, Willow’s sanity and or death are not options either.”



“Right, bye.”



“Bye.” Buffy said closing her phone and focusing back on William. “You hear all that?”



“Yeah,”



“So any ideas?”



“Right now, just one, we need to find Willow.”



“Any ideas how we…”



“AHHHHHHHH!” A scream interrupted Buffy’s comment and both instantly recognized the voice.



“Willow!” They both took off in a bolt, towards the sound.



~~~~



“That’s not true!” Willow yelled at the form before her.



“Yes it is, Will, it’s because of you I’m dead. You and your magic, you killed me.”



“Nooooo! Tara baby no, I loved you, so much.” Willow now cried. The form standing within the circle of light then changed now appearing with a huge bloody hole through her chest.



“This is what you call love Will?” Willow squeezed her eyes shut, and wailed.



“You can end this, just step into the light and it will all be over quickly.” A voice called from the surrounding darkness. Willow slowly lifted her head and looked into the face of Dawn.



“How could you Willow, How could you do this to me?” Dawn asked as her feet suddenly began to dematerialize into a glowing energy bubble, which slowly moved up her body.



“Dawnie, oh God I’m sorry…”



“Willow how could you do this to me?”



“I’m so sorry, please forgive me…Dawnie!” Willow cried as she curled up into a ball. “God help me, please someone help me.”



“Only you can help yourself, step into the light, and end it all.” Buffy and William rushed into the abandoned warehouse, once in they were surrounded by complete darkness, except the spot in the middle of the warehouse, where Willow lay in front of a bright blinding circle of light.



“Willow!” Buffy yelled as she and William then moved towards Willow’s limp form. Sudden several cloaked forms emerged from the darkness and grabbed at them. Buffy and William both swung and kicked, knocking them off easily. At that Moment Willow slowly stood directly in front of the light. “Willow, no!” Buffy called out.



“Yes step into the light.” A voice cried out.



“Yes end it all.” Another one said.



“Spike,” Buffy called to the vampire fighting beside her. “You get to her, you’re faster, I’ll hold them off.” He nodded and then ran to where Willow stood.



“Willow?” William moved in front of her grasping her arms and shaking her gently. She looked up at him with Tear filled eyes with were red and puffy as was her nose from all her crying.



“I have to go, it’s the only way to stop it.” Willow said. William could feel his dead heart breaking for her.



“This doesn’t concern you Vampire.” The hidden voices said from the darkness. William sent the a glare and a growl before he looked back to Willow.



“Make it stop, please just make it stop.” She looked up at him with pleading eyes.



“Do you trust me?” William asked her and she slowly nodded her head. “God forgive me.” He said and then in a flash he sunk in fangs into Willow’ neck and drank hardily. Buffy could only watch in horror as William fed from her friend, and then looked on as Willow’s limp form slipped from his hands and crumbled to the floor. William glared into the darkness, Willow’s blood still around his mouth and now coursing through his body. “This ends now.” He hissed, and then turned to the light.



“No!” The voices in the darkness cried out in unison as they realized what he was doing. Before they could stop him William stepped into the light.



“Ahhhhh!” He yelped in pain and fell to his knees as the light washed over and through his body. After a moment of this the light dispersed, leaving the room in complete darkness. Suddenly the lights within the warehouse came on, illuminating the room. Buffy looked around at what looked to be hundreds of cloaked forms though out the building. She then ran to where Willow and William now lay, she kneeled over Willow who slowly opened her eyes and smiled, and then turned her head to where William lay beside her. Willow reached out her hand and laced them with William’s as she smiled at him and in a weak voice said, ‘Thank you.’ And Buffy realized that he hadn’t been trying to harm her but save her, and in that moment her heart broke.



“You have interfered in matters that don’t concern you.” One of the cloaked figured said as they stepped forward. “This witch has broken the laws of our craft, she has played God with her actions and now must pay for it.” Buffy stood and faced the figure.



“And what the hell do you think you were doing here?” She spat at them. “You were playing God by Judging her and then sentencing her to death through magic. So you’re just as guilty as she is.” Many gasped and mumbling could be heard throughout the building as the many forms began to discuss what Buffy had said. “This ends here. You leave Willow alone, if you must them strip her of her powers.”



“We can not, she’s too powerful for that.”



“Then bind her.” William said from his spot on the floor where he now sat up, cradling Willow in his arms. “You can bind her from doing harm with magic.” There was a brief silence before the form spoke.



“It will be done, but if this witch ever uses magic to harm another mortal, she will die.” With that the forms back off and filed out of the building.



“Will she be…” Buffy began before William interjected.



“She’ll be fine, weak for a few days. I wasn’t trying to hurt her, I just took enough to fill my body, hoping it would fool the demon.” Buffy nodded her understandings, and then she looked to him thoughtfully.



“Will you be ok?”



“Yeah, I’ll be sore for bit, and I’ve now got one hell of a tan.” He said with a smile, which Buffy matched.



“No I meant…”



“I know what you meant, and yeah I’m good. Willow’s save and that’s all that matters right?” Buffy just gave him a sad look. “Come on give us a hand, let’s get sleeping beauty here home.”



~~~~



“”You guys are back!” Dawn said happily as she greeted Buffy and William as they entered the house. “Oh God what happened is she…” Dawn asked in a panicked voice, betraying her earlier declarations of hate and uncaring towards Willow.



“She’s fine Dawnie.” Buffy assured.



“Her neck.” Giles stated.



“Yeah, William bit her…” Buffy began to explain only to cut off by a now irate Xander.



“He bit her? You son- of- a-…”



Punch!



“Owww, what did you do that for, he bit her.” Xander said pinching his nose, which Buffy had just smacked, with one hand and pointing accusingly at William with the other hand.



“He saved her Xander, her blood was the only way to appease the demon, so…”



“You drank her blood, filling your body with it and thus fooling the demon.” Giles finished and both William and Buffy nodded. “Incredible, that could have very well have worked for Buffy when…” He instantly ended that train of thought, it was a mute point now, and he could see it pained both Buffy and William who he could tell had already thought about it. “The important thing is that you’re all safe.”



“Right, where should I…” William asked.



“You can put her in my room.” Dawn quickly offered with a smile, which William returned before moving to the stairs with Buffy and Dawn close behind him.



“Did that hurt?” Anya asked Xander with what he thought to be concern.



“Yes, is it bleeding?” Xander asked as he lifted his nose to her.



“Profusely.” She said now beaming at him. “Finally you got what you deserved and had coming, and it’s all the more sweeter that Buffy did it.” She sighed as she sat back comfortably in her chair as Giles and Xander stared at her in disbelief.



~~~~



“It’s ok, I’ll stay with her.” Dawn said to William who stood over Willow’s now sleeping form. He nodded and then made his way to the door where Buffy stood watching. They left the room, closing the door behind them. William had to brace himself against the wall to keep from falling.



“You should lie down too.” Buffy said to him as she moved to help him stand up right, but William quickly jumped from her grasped, as if he had been burnt by her touch.



“I will, soon as I get home.”



“You won’t make it. Come on let’s get you cleaned up and you can rest in my mom’s room.” Buffy said as she moved to the bathroom, William followed stopping abruptly at the door. Buffy turned back to him not understanding for a second before it struck her. She moved and sat on the seat of the toilet as he remained leaning on the doorframe. “That night after it happened,” Buffy spoke softly just enough where she knew he could hear her. “I had a bad nightmare, very bad and it scared me so much,” William clamped his eyes shut at the knowledge that he had caused her so much pain. “It was in that dream that I realized that you were the victim that night, not me.” He slowly opened his eyes and looked at her in a daze by what she was saying. “I was the monster who had been hurting you, using you, raping you, and you had gotten to the point where you couldn’t take it anymore, so you fought back. I know that you didn’t come here intent on hurting me, you simply wanted solace and forgiveness, and I spat on you AGAIN.” Buffy said as a tear trickled down her cheek. “Well, now I’m asking for solace and forgiveness. Please forgive me Spike.” She said as she stood and looked directly at him with tear filled eyes. He stood frozen in the doorway, watching her skeptically. “Please, please forgive me.” She repeated and she moved to him laying her head against his chest and wrapping her arms around him. He didn’t respond at first, couldn’t, but nor could he stand to see her, the woman that he loved more then his own life, begging him for forgiveness. He slowly enveloped her into his embraced and she let out a relieved cry and tightened her grip. They stood there simply holding on to each other and crying, both happy that their past was now behind them, and frightened at the possible future that lay ahead.