Author's Chapter Notes:
This story's getting so close to the end...think it's about 90% done at the moment :( It's so sad, my first big story is ending. But don't worry, I'll have a new one coming up....might even have a new short one that I've only posted on LJ so far, coming next week.

Thank you so much for all of the reviews, I can't even believe that I'm nearing 500 reviews on this story---it just blows my mind, thank you, thank you, thank you!

And I hope everyone enjoyed my ficlets '113 Times' and it's sequel 'A New Year's Countdown'. And a little note for everyone who read the last one: the ending stuff wasn't short, it's just that was the part of it I focussed on (I know I'm being vague but some might not have read it).

Please read, enjoy and review! (It'll help me get some of these new stories written!)




Chapter 36: Aftermath and explanations

It seemed to take them an abnormally long time to get across town. Once there William started to leave, but Buffy placed a hand on his arm and gave him a look. A look that he wanted to be able to say he didn't understand, but in all honesty he understood perfectly what she meant.

He was somehow involved in all of this--how, he still hadn't figured out just yet--and Buffy wanted him there because it concerned him, but also because...because she wanted him there. Sometimes he wished he didn't love her as much as he did, it would spare him the heartache of situations like these if he didn't.

'But heartache can only last so long,' he assured himself.

No one said a word as they all three made their way into the house. And no one said anything for a while after they were in the house--Buffy was glad to see that her mother was out. "Sam, baby, do you want us to go up to your room? I think we need to talk about what Daddy," Did she still call him 'Daddy' for Sam or should she call him Angel, or... "About what he said back at the doctors'. Do you want to do that up in your room or down here?"

Buffy hoped that giving Sam as many choices as possible would help ease the situation just a bit.

"I want to go upstairs," Sam said, sounding relatively calm.

"Alright sweetheart." William started to stay downstairs, but Buffy put a stop to that idea, "Sam, honey, William's going to come up with us too, okay?"

Sam looked at him, or rather she scrutinized him the best a six-year-old could. "Okay," she said at long last.

As Sam made her way slowly upstairs, William held Buffy back, "Are you going to tell me what's going on? I don't like being in the dark here, luv. 'Specially when I feel like I've done something. Something that hurt her," he looked up at Sam.

Buffy sighed, knowing she couldn't put this off any longer, "Angel told her that you're her father," she said softly. "Apparently he misunderstood something she said about why we were there today and well...he told her."

He wanted to get angry, wanted to rant and rave about how much of a moron Angel was and what all he was going to do to him when he got half the chance--but he didn't. "Guess we need to get up there then," was all he said before letting Buffy lead the way to Sam's bedroom.

*(*(*(*(*(*(*(*)*)*)*)*)*)*

Buffy wasn't sure how she'd been put in this position, it felt like just a few hours ago she'd been explaining the divorce to Sam and now she had to explain this, damn Angel for putting her in this place--he hadn't even offered to help. She would have refused of course--he didn't seem to have any tact where Sam was concerned, or common sense for that matter--but he could have at least offered.

"Mommy, why did Daddy say he's not my daddy?" Buffy was sitting on the bed across from Sam and William was leaning against the door frame, not wanting to intrude.

With one last glance at William for assurance, Buffy began, "Sam, you know hold I told you that when two grown ups love each other they can make a baby?"

"Uh huh."

Buffy was fumbling and she knew it, "Well Daddy wasn't the one I made a baby with, but he is the one that I married and that acted as your Daddy. So, in that way he is your daddy." 'Like that made any sense,' Buffy thought.

"But you made a baby with William?" Sam was looking doubtfully at the aforementioned man.

"Yes, sweetheart, I did."

Sam took a few minutes to take it all in. She had a little bit of an understanding of the idea that whoever got a woman pregnant was the baby's father, but she was still trying to get her head around te fact that it had been William and...

"Why did you marry Daddy if William and you were having a baby?"

'Isn't that the sixty-four thousand dollar question...' William knew it was time for him to step in and help Buffy as best he could. "Because cupcake, your mum and Angel had been dating and she loved him very much and she knew he would take good care of you two. She didn't know me as well, so she wanted to make sure she did the safe thing so that you would be okay."

"Okay," Sam replied thoughtfully.

"Do you have any more questions, Sammy Sam?" At least she didn't hate him or cry when she looked at him anymore.

"I don't know," Sam answered truthfully.

"Tell you what, your mum and I will go downstairs and you can think about it and if you do have any more questions, you come ask us, okay?"

William gave Sam a smile, not wanting to push it by giving her a hug, not knowing that he was in fact making her worry more by not giving her one. They were both so afraid of rejection from the other.

Buffy looked at her daughter and thought she knew what the girl was thinking, "You can if you want to."

Looking at her mother, who just nodded at her, Sam quickly got up and ran over to William giving his legs a hug.

Once he'd been able to regain his composure, he leaned down and looked at Sam, "Remember if you have any questions, you come ask me alright? I promise to try to answer any question."

(*(*(*(*(*(*)*)*)*)

After Buffy had a few minutes alone with Sam, making sure her daughter wasn't just afraid to ask her anything with William there, she joined him in the kitchen.

"Are you okay?"

"Don't rightly know at the moment." William said, sinking into one of the kitchen chairs. "I thought we'd have some time to figure all this out, come up with the best way to tell her and all that."

"I thought so too," Buffy sat down next to him.

"He...I just...with the...I don't want her to hate me," he finally said.

"I don't think she could ever hate you," Buffy started to explain.

"But, Buffy, you saw the way she looked at me back there. It was like I'd destroyed everything she knew...like I was ruining her life...like I was this horrible person...like I hurt her," he finished quietly.

"William," Buffy started to respond to what he'd said, but found it hard to do with him staring at his lap. "William, look at me. She wasn't thinking you turned everything upside down, Angel did that and you were just the unsure part of it. Imagine being six-years-old and your father telling you he's not really your father. And then seeing the person he says is, a person you've loved and looked up to for months. It's gotta be hard for her to sort all that out in her head. And she didn't think you were a horrible person, it was just too much for her to handle. And," Buffy continued, "She and I both know you'd never hurt her."

William was silent for a few moments before he let out a bitter laugh, "Look at me, making you comfort me...You're the one who's got all of this," he waved his hand around, "going on and I'm here two seconds away from bawling like a baby because I'm scared a little girl I've known less than a year is mad at me. She's your daughter, you're the one dealing with getting divorced and now this...I'm as much an insensitive prick as Angel."

"William, you're not." Buffy insisted vehemently. "I understand how you're feeling. And don't think you're making me do anything, this is helping me right now. I'll be okay as long as I can take care of someone, I can't fall apart now, I just can't. Later when Sam's asleep and I know she's okay, but...not now."

Any reply he might have had was cut off by Sam entering the kitchen.

"Yes, bit?" he asked when she didn't say anything.

"Can you come up to my room? Not Mommy, just.."

"Um, sure I can," Sam waited for him to get up and start walking before she went back to her room

William sat on the bed this time. "Do you only like me because you're my real daddy?"

"What?" William asked, astonished, "Why would..Sam, baby, I love you. You're my favoritest little girl and not because I'm your real dad. You're a very smart little girl and you're beautiful and you're a sweetheart and you're just perfect, Sam. Even if I wasn't you dad I'd love you."

"But you are," she pointed out.

"But I am," he agreed. "But that doesn't mean we have to do anything different. You can still call me William and I'll still be your teacher. And I'll still do stuff with you."

That seemed to relieve some of her worries, "Are you and Mommy going to date now?"

"I don't know," he answered truthfully. "Maybe."

"Okay," Sam said and William knew it was time for him to go back downstairs.

William sat with Buffy for a few more minutes before he excused himself. He needed to get some alone time to think through things.

"And tell Sam that if she has any more questions," he ignored the smile on her face, "That she can call me--whenever it is."

"Okay, I'll be sure to tell her that."

"And if you need anything..."

"I know. And, William?"

"Yeah, pet?"

"Can I kiss you?" Maybe it wasn't the smartest idea with her...no their daughter just upstairs and after everything that had gone on today, but...he'd been so sweet and loving and thoughtful and he'd helped her with telling Sam and he'd just been so...great today.

William didn't answer her, just leaned down and lightly brushed his lips over hers. "I'll see you later, luv. And for future reference, you don't have to ask every time you're going to kiss me--think we've pretty well determined what my answer's going to be"

TBC.......







Please do review, this was a pretty serious chapter and I'm worried about how well I handled everything...





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