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Author's Chapter Notes:
sorry I'm late, but I have good reason: I GOT A NEW COMPUTER....

I want to thank everyone who's stuck with me and who still enjoys this fic, I want to thank you so, so much....and to everyone still a little unsure, try to remember that there is a reason why Buffy took the job and why she's acting how she is--a reason you'll find out eventually....also, remember she's only 19.

Thank you fro all of the positive feedback I received on the last chapter, after the negative reviews, the good ones really did help me :)
Chapter 21

Why did he care?

It was the question Spike had asked himself at least a hundred of times during the night.

He'd thought over and over what had happened--which was easy since it wasn't that much. He'd woken up to Buffy getting herself off with the vibrator and whatever the person on the phone was saying, she'd seen that he was all hard and ready and decided that fucking him would be better than messing with some toy.

So he was back to his question. He knew that last night really had absolutely nothing to do with him--he was just better than a little piece of plastic, not much to brag about there.

But it wasn't like Buffy hadn't given him any indication that that was what she thought. He knew she didn't want him.

So, again, why did he care?

The easy answer was that he hated to fail and he seemed to be failing in his plan of making Buffy see that he did care about her. But that wasn't really it. Really....it was that he'd thought he had been succeeding. They'd had a great time in the pool and Buffy seemed to have gotten the message that he enjoyed doing things with her that didn't involve sex.

Either he hadn't gotten the message across very well or she just didn't like the message.

The more he thought about it, the more it seemed like the second option.

So he cared—he cared because he was falling in love with a girl who was so down on herself that she was determined to break his heart just so he'd agree with her. He didn't think he was strong enough to stick with it...with her.

And really, was he doing more harm than good? He was certainly starting to think so.


Apparently some successes felt even worse than a failure. Or at least that's what Buffy had decided during the last few hours. She'd accomplished everything she wanted--Spike knew she wasn't good enough for him, that she was just good for sex now. But she had been planning on reminding him that that's what he thought.

But he didn't seem to. Huh.

She turned her attention back to the movie she'd been watching and decided she was just reading too much into things. She needed to just leave it alone and be glad things were fixed now.


Okay, this was getting annoying. Spike hadn't said anything since he'd come out of his room nearly an hour ago. Which, okay, normally would have been fine...if he had been someone other than himself. But come on, this was Spike. Spike who didn't know how to shut up.

Something was up.

And she'd had enough of it.

"What are you doing?" she called from her spot on the sofa. But if she was expecting an answer she would have been sorely disappointed; Spike, who had been fixing a bowl of cereal, just held up the bowl and then turned back around and continued with his breakfast.

Okaaaay, so obviously that wasn't going to work. She went back to watching her movie.


He really needed to move out. He couldn't seem to bring himself to talk to Buffy and, well....that was going to be a problem as long as they were living in the same house. Hence the needing to move out.

He didn't even know why he was out of his room. Some sort of masochistic need to see for himself that she wasn't miserable. He knew she wouldn’t be, but for some reason he needed to see it.

Maybe this was he wouldn't be able to stay in the wonderful world of denial for long, if at all.

"Spike? Want to watch the movie?" Buffy interrupted his thoughts not even twenty minutes after she'd asked the first question.

He turned and saw that Buffy was looking at him, so he just shook his head in the negative, still not ready to talk to her yet. And he thought it was going to work, this plan of his.

But Buffy stopped him once again, just before he got to his room.

"Oooh," she mocked, "I'm not going to talk to Buffy because she hurt my...." Buffy stopped, almost not finishing at all until she saw that Spike had already gone into his room and closed the door. "Feelings," she finished quietly. 'Fuck,' she thought, 'he wasn't supposed to get hurt. He's supposed to be mad. Mad, dammit, but not hurt!

It had better be a temporary thing. Because...

'No,' she decided. 'It doesn’t matter if he's mad or hurt or whatever else he fucking feels like feeling. He has no right to make me feel guilty for this! It's his own damn fault for being so stupid...and, and...stubborn and...naive! Yep,' she readily agreed silently with herself. 'Definitely all his fault.'

And, so, with that split second decision, Buffy decided to be mad at Spike rather than worry about how he was feeling. If he wasn't going to talk to her, she wasn't going to talk to him!


"I told you he wouldn't answer me!" Buffy knew she sounded immature but she didn't like her mother not believing her.

"Buffy," her mother explained, treating her very much like a child, "You'll have to excuse me if I don't believe that a 33-year-old grown man would just refuse to answer an invitation to lunch.”

"Well he did."

Joyce didn't dignify that with an answer, just walking over and knocking on William's door. She ignored Buffy's muttered 'told you so' when William didn't answer for longer than was polite.

"William?" she asked, knocking again.

This time he rushed to the door not five seconds later.

He apologized profusely when he realized just who was knocking on the door. "Sorry, Joyce. I wasn't meaning to ignore you."

Buffy knew from his tone that he had meant to ignore her but her mother didn't seem to notice anything wrong with what he said. God, that was just like her! To put all the blame on Buffy. And now Spike was helping her! Stupid Spike! Buffy sat back on the sofa and pouted as her mother and Spike continued their little talk.

"That's alright, I never thought that you were. Buffy just didn't want to get up from her movie, I guess." She looked pointedly at her daughter, who was still pouting and trying her best to ignore them. "I had wanted to ask if you would like to come to lunch with us tomorrow? I know that it must seem like I'm taking up all of your time so if you already have plans I completely understand."

The way she said 'with us' made him think that she meant Buffy was included so he tried to think of a way out of it.

"I actually think I have some sort of conference call at some point during lunch tomorrow. I'd love to commit to lunch but it looks like I'm going to have to stick around here."

"That's fine," Joyce assured him. "Besides, it'll be nice to have some alone time with Rupert--he never does want to go out but he's already agreed to this." Joyce seemed truly happy with this outcome, not noticing the reaction of the other two in the room, well, not at first.

"Don't worry William," she promised, "Buffy will leave you alone to do your work. And Buffy, don't pout so. It really is rather unbecoming...and don't tell me again that William is ignoring you--just get over yourself and ask the question for me."

But this time she didn't miss William's look...of guilt.

She decided not to say anything, instead deciding to talk to her husband when she got back to their house. "I'll see you for our lunch later, Buffy," She said, making it a statement not a question, as she left the pool house.



TBC....Please review......more Just a Thing coming on Thursday

and I don't think my author's note adequately expresses just how very grateful I am for all of you lovely reviews....THANK YOU





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