Author's Chapter Notes:
I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as much as the rest, it's Buffy-centric. :)
Chapter 13

“William, I don’t want to do this.”

When he failed to respond, Buffy turned towards the kitchen and let out a soft sigh.

“Guess you’re not going to come to my rescue this time, are you?!” she called, even though he was nowhere to be seen.

“Mommy!”

“Yes, Jamie?”

He popped up from the floor and charged forward. “Mommy, we can’t hear the TV. We can’t hear Rudolph.”

“You can’t hear Rudolph?”

“Joy’s loud,” Sarah complained. “Too loouud.”

“Are you watching a tape?” Taking a hold of Jamie’s hand, they walked together to check the VCR. “Hey, why don’t you stop the movie now, and I’ll watch it with you later, when Joy’s quiet again?”

“What will we do with no Rudolph?”

Buffy chuckled as Sarah threw up her arms. “Sweetie, I’m glad you asked. First, we’ll make Joy happy again, then we’ll all get squeaky clean--.”

“What?!” Jamie said. “I don’t wanna bath!”

“Okay, suit yourself, but I happen to know Santa doesn’t come to houses were children smell like cupcakes and tomato sauce…”

“What? Why not?”

“Well, he’s totally against it. It…it hurts his nose. He won’t come, Jamie, not if you don’t take a bath. The smell of cupcakes and tomato sauce, it’s like…it’s like bug spray for Santas.”

“Ooohh. I wanna little bath then, not a big one.”

“A little bath? Okay,” she grinned. “We’ll give you a little bath.”

“Mommy. Mommy.”

“Yeah?” Buffy whispered back once Sarah appeared, snuggled against her side.

“I, I don’t want daddy to do it. Daddy made my hair hurt.”

“Oh, but Sarah…I’ll give you a bath, but you’ve got to understand, daddy didn’t mean to pull your hair. He loves you and he was upset after hurting you.”

“Upset?” Sarah repeated, her face blank with confusion. “What does that mean?”

“He was sad--.”

“He was sad?”

“Very sad, and very, very sorry.”

“Where is daddy? Where’d he go?”

“He…he had to go to the store.”

“Oh.”

“But next time you see him, maybe you should give him a big hug? Maybe you should tell him how much you love him? I think he’d like that.”

“Okay.”

“Okay,” Buffy repeated, taking Sarah’s hand, along with Jamie’s and giving it a squeeze. “I think we’ve made Joy wait long enough, don’t you?”
***

“Uht-oh!”

“Holy—bad, bad baby!” Buffy struggled to keep Joy still on the changing table. With her free hand, she brushed the spilled baby powder off her chest. “Jamie, can you pick up the bottle for me, please? Sarah? Wipe.”

Buffy wrinkled her nose. She was flicking what she considered the hundredth and final wipe into the trash when Jamie started to giggle. “Oh, no,” she said, noticing the smell of fresh powder. “What are you doing?”

“Look what I can do! It’s neat!” he answered, squeezing the bottle again and again, releasing clouds of white into the air. “It’s like snow, mom!”

“I know it’s neat, but,” Buffy put on a fresh diaper with surprising ease, replaced Joy’s wooly outfit, let out a groan the moment she turned her head. Jamie’s clothes were covered in white and so was the carpet beneath him. “Oh, Jamie! You’re bad too!”

“I’m not--.”

“Yes you are!” While cuddling Joy, Buffy snatched the baby powder and put it aside. “Don’t leave this room, mister. Take off your clothes, and we’ll get you directly into a bath.”

“Hey, this is neat! Look, mommy, I’m making you a picture.”

“Sarah…”

“I’m making you a Christmas tree. Do you like it?”

“Oh…I do.” Buffy sighed, feeling sick to her stomach as she watched Sarah sprinkle powder directly onto the carpet. “But I think I’d like it even more if I could keep it, honey. You know that all the fun powder is going to be cleaned up, right?”

“But—am I bad too?”

“You’re as bad as Joy for kicking the bottle, and as bad as Jamie for squeezing the bottle…”

Sarah shook the bottle twice more to put the finishing touches on her tree before giving it to her mother. “Sorry,” she said softly. “I don’t wanna be bad. Santa won’t come if I’m bad. I’m sorry, mommy.”

“Oh,” Buffy blinked. “It’s okay—I mean, don’t worry. I doubt he was watching you guys anyway. Jamie was so good at making those powdery clouds that…Santa couldn’t see, I know it.”

“Are you sure?” Jamie asked, standing behind Buffy. His pants were off and he was struggling to pull his shirt over his head. “You won’t tell?”

“I promise. Come here, let me help you.” She set Joy on the floor and sat next to her. “Would I tell on you? Um, do I usually do that?”

“You tell daddy,” Sarah answered. “All the time. You tell him everything.”

“Yeah, and he gives us timeout. We can’t watch TV, and we can’t leave the corner!”

“Really? You poor little things.”

As soon as Buffy freed Jamie from his clothing, he stuck out his lower lip. “I love TV.”

“I’m sure you do. So, if you had a choice, if I told Santa or your daddy, whom would you pick? Would you rather have timeout or no new toys since you were bad?”

“Daddy,” Sarah said, causing Jamie to nod his head in agreement.

“But you said you won’t tell, mom!”

“I did, but who’s gonna help me clean this mess up? You?” she asked, poking Jamie’s stomach.

“Yes!” he giggled. “We’ll do it!”

“You’ll do it? You in your Superman undies and Sarah in her—Sarah come here.” Once Sarah came close, Buffy turned her around and patted her backside. “Did you sit in the powder, sweetie?”

“You’re sitting in it too, mommy. You need a bath.”

“Joy does too!”

Buffy followed Jamie’s pointed finger and sighed again at the sight of Joy slapping the powdery carpet. “Okay, everybody in the bathroom!”
***

“I’ve never had to multitask so much in my life.” Buffy held Joy’s hands and helped her walk back and forth from the toilet to the tub. After washing the twins, she kept Joy entertained while they played in the bath.

“Sarah, didn’t I say no splashing? Is the water cold yet?”

“No!”

“Are you pruney? Let me see your hands.”

“We’re not prunes!”

“You have five more minutes then.”

Buffy led Joy across the room and picked her up once they reached the bathroom window. “Don’t peek,” she whispered, opening the blinds with her fingers just enough to see William working in the backyard.

“Where’s his jacket? He’s out there in the freezing cold and—oh God, do I sound like a naggy wife or what?” Buffy laughed, feeling ridiculous. “You know what he told me earlier, Jo? He said, and I quote: “I’m game for anything.” He was talking about tonight and—gah, just thinking about what he could’ve had in mind makes my stomach do somersaults.”

“Because, well, he said this after I mentioned him trying to get into my pants and after I kind of jumped him at the sink… Clearly, we’ve had sex before, because…” she trailed off again and brushed a kiss against Joy’s temple.

“Okay, let’s pretend I did not just say that. You’re way too young to find out how babies are born. When you’re older I’ll tell you a story about a stork bringing newborn babies to their parents, and it’ll be a big hairy lie. I know lying is never good, but you won’t be able to handle the truth, not for a very, very long time. You see, the truth, it isn’t pretty; the interlocking parts, the exchange of bodily fluids, the horrible pain of childbirth—not that I’ve ever experienced it, not that I remember, but it sounds terrible, the pain…excruciating even.”

As she chewed her lip, William looked toward the house and her stomach flipped. “I see why the, why the story was made up, but God, Joy, even with the lack of pretty, I’d take the interlocking, the fluids, the pain—gah, the orgasm any day over a visit from a smelly old bird.”

“Even orgasms aside,” Buffy looked into Joy’s wide hazel eyes, and then tickled her until she giggled, “I think the pain would’ve been worth it.

“Sorry, baby,” she whispered, kissing her again. “I just had to talk to someone. I’m nervous, I have no idea what tonight’s going to bring.” She closed the blinds carefully and turned back to the twins. “Okay, everybody out!”
***





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