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Author's Chapter Notes:
I know, I really should have another story to be posting by now--and I would like to as well........but this flu thing is just pure evil
Chapter 21


“That’s your question?!” Spike could not help but ask.

“What? It is a logical question. I thought I looked kind of young, but…hmmm.”

“You’re really not going to say—“

“Spike,” Joyce interrupted, deciding maybe it would be better not to bring her daughter’s attention to the fact that she had not vehemently denied being Spike’s wife.

“What?” he couldn’t stop from shifting his eyes almost constantly back to Buffy, expecting the realization and her resulting explosion to come any moment.

“Leave it,” she said simply.

“What?”

“Buffy, sweetie, don’t worry. You don’t look old enough to be married; it was just a natural assumption on his part, it had nothing to do with how old you look.”

“You sure?”

“Positive,” Joyce looked to Spike for support.

“Yeah, luv, you hardly look legal…but not in the I’m attracted to underage girls sense,” he amended quickly. “That’s Angelus’ thing,” he mumbled quietly but loud enough that they could have both easily heard him.

“Alright if I exit the Twilight Zone and go get the Bit? She’ll be ‘bout ready to kill the boy by now I’d reckon.”

“That would be wonderful of you Spike, thank you.”

“But don’t stay out there with them. I’m not going to explain to the doctors why you’re getting sudden, mysterious, overly painful headaches.”

“Yeah, they’ll think something’s in the water,” he was still trying to figure out what the hell was in the water that had stopped there from being any major outbursts from Buffy in the last five minutes.

He was twenty feet down the hallway when he rushed back. “Buffy, pet? Can I talk to you out here for a moment?”

“Yeah, sure,” she said, looking at him strangely, but still walking out into the hallway.

“Alright, let me have it.”

“What?” Maybe it was her being sick or all the happenings of the last twelve hours but she had no idea what the hell he was talking about.

“I was just…” now he felt really stupid. “The doc said nothing too excitable for your mum so I thought if you needed to yell at me or something…”

“Nope…can’t think of anything.”

“Well,” he said lamely fumbling for what to say, “Okay then. I’ll go get the Bit, I guess.”

“What was that about?” Joyce asked when Buffy came back.

“He wanted me to yell at him or something,” Buffy looked puzzled.

“How do you mean?”

“He was sure there was something I wanted to yell at him about but wasn’t because the doctor said to keep things calm for you.”

“Buffy, when you go home later, I think you need to have a talk with William.”

“A talk with Spike? About what?”

“Your feelings for him,” her mother answered simply.

“What?” Buffy tried to keep her voice down, but she couldn’t stop the surprise. “What are you talking about.”

“Buffy, do you know why he thought you were going to yell at him?”

“For the thing about Angel?”

“Sweetheart,” Joyce marveled at how oblivious her daughter could be to some things, “do you remember how Willow did the spell last year and you and Spike got engaged?”

“Yeah…I decided not to have her do that forgetting spell; even though all of that was majorly weird.”

“And why was it weird, honey?”

“Because I was getting married to—I didn’t say anything about the doctor thinking I was married to Spike did I?” she honestly hadn’t noticed her slip.

“No, you didn’t; and ever since that spell last year, you’ve gotten upset the few times Dawn’s made jokes about it….and now,” her mother just looked at her and Buffy knew what she meant.

“And now I’m acting like it’s no big deal….Yeah, that would uh….Can’t I just yell at him and have him think it was just temporary memory loss or something?”

“Would that really be that much easier than having an actual conversation with him?”

“Yes,” Buffy said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“Well how then are you going to explain not being upset about what he said about Angel?”

“That’s actually kind of part of why I didn’t get mad about the first thing…Angel hasn’t even called, you know? And…I mean I know we’re not dating anymore and haven’t been for a while, but I thought…and even Willow and Xander…they’ve all kind of forgotten about me. But Spike…he was thinking enough to go to the mall and make that damn bear and then bring it over…and he….he actually came up with a reason for why I’m not weak right now that I actually…it actually makes sense. Everyone else…they’re just kind of acting like, “Oh, Buffy’s the Slayer, she’ll get over it’ and I think…sometimes I think that when I’m the Slayer that it’s fun for them but when I’m just me and have just…life going on, that it’s not really that interesting for them. Like maybe they’re here for the drama….and that sounds horrible, doesn’t it?”

“Buffy, I hadn’t wanted to say anything, but…your friends have been around a remarkably little amount since you’ve gotten sick and I’m not even sure just how much—or at least how hard—they’re trying to figure this out. But Spike…Even when you shut him out Buffy he still cared….and I have a feeling he’s been around more than I know about,” Joyce trailed off.

“He uhm….at night sometimes he—“

“Is this something your mother wants to hear?”

“You know the tree across from my window? Not the one under it but the other one?”

“Yes.”

“Sometimes at night, he just….him watching me at night should be creepy I know, but…I know he’s making sure nothing tries to attack us and…”

“He’s making sure you’re safe.”

“Yeah,” Buffy started to say more but Dawn came in the room then and she knew Spike could only be a few seconds behind.

Except that he wasn’t.

“Where’d Spike go?”

“God, he’s such an idiot,” Dawn sighed like only a girl her age could do and rolled her eyes. Marching back over to the door she stuck her arm out the door and pulled a very reluctant Spike in by the arm.

“I told you, Bit. Letting you girls have some time to yourselves.”

“Which is a nice gesture, Spike,” Joyce agreed, “but I think we’d all rather you came back inside.”

Spike still looked slightly uncomfortable, but stayed in the room. Only he walked to stand in the far corner. Dawn started to get from her place at the foot of the bed to get him, but Joyce stopped her when she noticed Buffy doing the same.


“Come on,” Buffy grabbed for his hand, but he did his best to evade her grasp. Soon though all that resulted in was her standing very close to him and holding his hand. “What’s going on?” The concern in her eyes was something new for him.

“We had a nice couple of hours and you think you like having me round but…I don’t want you to look back on this in however long and regret not telling me to get lost,” he admitted, figuring he really had nothing to lose.

“What are you talking about?”

“Buffy, until just a few hours ago, you couldn’t stand me; why do you think you suddenly want me here? It’s just because a lot’s happened and you think—“

“And I think nothing,” she kept her voice quiet, “Spike, how many times have I told you to quit standing outside my window every night?” She waited a second for the answer she knew wasn’t coming. “And how long did it take me to give you the bear back?”

“It’s easy to like a bear, pet. ‘s like liking a puppy; doesn’t mean you have to like who gave it to you.”

“Spike if Xander or….or Angel had given me that teddy bear—not that either of them ever would have thought of that…Spike I love that bear because you cared enough to…you have to like make those bears and then pick out their clothes—and their slippers,” she grinned. “And you recorded the thing too…That wasn’t a split second decision. I’ve been sleeping with that bear every night Spike. And part of it’s because it’s you that gave him to me. I don’t have all the time to explain it now, but…can’t you just trust that Dawn and I…we want you here. So does my mom. Please.”

It was the ‘please’ that did him in. He didn’t think he was ever going to hear her say it like that.

“Thank you,” she said when she realized he was giving in. Keeping a hold of his hand she walked back over to the bed. Dawn was now sitting in the chair so Buffy sat on the end of the bed, Spike standing behind her.

“So who wants to hear what Anya said to Xander when he said that maybe he should call Angel?”





TBC..............



oh, and a big thank you to Cordykitten for adding me as one of her favorite authors--and to anyone else who has that I didn't say anything to :)





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