Author's Chapter Notes:
I posted this before but took it down for a rewrite and get the ideas organized. Read and review. If you read this story and don't leave a review, I'll eat your liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti
Revelation
Chapter 1: The Anniversary
Disclaimer: If I owned this, Spike would’ve gone to Buffy when he got back. Like he should have. Damn you Whedon!

It was May 20th, the anniversary of the closing of the Hellmouth. One year since the destruction of Sunnydale. One year since Willow called all the slayers. One year since they stopped the First. One year since the biggest fight of their lives. One year since the last time she saw him. But she tried to push that aside for this evening.

Today was a happy occasion; it was the first time all the Scoobies were together since forever. It was like Thanksgiving, but no Native American vengeance spirits. They decided to meet at Buffy’s apartment in Rome, and since no one wanted to do all the cooking they went for a potluck dinner. Faith brought chicken wings, Xander brought chips and dip, Willow and Kennedy brought cookies, Giles brought a blueberry pie, Andrew made meatloaf, and Buffy and Dawn made lasagna.

“So, how’s everybody been since we last talked?” Buffy asked, feeling happier being with her old friends.

“Me and Kennedy have been havin’ fun in Brazil.” Willow said, holding her girlfriend’s hand.

“Yeah, you both got a great tan.” Dawn said, noticing the bronzed skin of the witch and Slayer.

“Thanks, we met a bunch of neat Slayers and some new magic.” Willow said happily.

“And lots of romantic beaches.” Kennedy added, smiling at the red head.

“But what about you Faith, last I heard you and Robin really hit it off?” Willow asked, wondering where the former principal was.

“What can I say? The guy didn’t surprise me like he said he would. Besides, I think me bein’ a slayer was fuel some Oedipal complex.”

“A what complex?” Dawn asked.

“That means he was attracted to her because she reminded him of his mother.” Willow supplied.

“Ewww.” Said Dawn pulling a face.

“What about you B? Still with the Immortal?” Faith asked.

“A world of no.” Buffy said, feeling bile rise in her throat at the memory of that bastard. “He cheated on me.”

“Sorry.” Faith said, not wanting to piss Buffy off now that they were on the same page.

“It’s al right, I kinda knew hat he was just rebound anyway.” Buffy said, some deep buried feelings rising. “I think I just wanted someone to take my mind off of…Spike.” She finished sadly.

“You really miss him, huh?” Xander asked, not noticing that Andrew was squirming slightly.

“Yeah, I do.” She said, remembering their last moments together. “I wish he still here. I wish we could’ve had a chance at a fresh start.”

“You still could.” Andrew said quietly.

“Huh, Andrew?” Buffy asked, half distracted by something Willow was saying.

“Um, Buffy,” Andrew started, trying to find the courage to say what he was thinking. “There’s something I think you should know.”

Knock-knock-knock

Andrew was cut off by a knock at the door. Dawn got up and walked to the door, opening it to reveal three strange beings; a green man with horns, a blue skinned woman in a leather leotard, and a pretty cute guy with purple eyes.

“Demons!” Dawn screamed, the rest of the Scoobies ran to the door, weapons in hand.

“Wait!” Willow, Faith, and the green demon yelled simultaneously.

“Wait? Why wait?” Xander asked, axe raised.

“That’s Lorne, he’s one of Angel’s friends, and he’s not evil.” Willow said, putting her sword down.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence, Sweet tart.” Lorne said, stepping into the apartment, accompanied by the strange blue skinned woman and the handsome man with purple eyes. “Good to see you again Willow, Faith how’s it goin’?”

“Fine, yourself?” Faith asked, a little surprised at Lorne’s demeanor. Willow noticed too, Lorne was always happy and cheerful, now he looked like he lost his best friend. Which wasn’t far from the truth.

“What’s wrong?” Willow asked, hoping this was just a social call and not an apocalypse alert.

“A lot, Sugarplum.” Lorne said, his voice heavy with emotion. “Can we sit down? I think you need to sit for this info.”

“OK.” Buffy said, not liking the direction this conversation was going.

“First, introductions. This is Groosalugg and Illyria, and I’m Lorne.” The green demon said, gesturing to his comrades.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Buffy, this is Dawn, the man with the glasses is Giles, the guy with the eye patch is Xander, that’s Kennedy with the crossbow, and you know Willow, Faith, and I guess Andrew.”

“Yep.” Lorne said, taking a deep breath. “I’m afraid that I bear not good news.”

“Wonderful, cause we never get tired of that.” Xander said, rolling his eye.

“I know that you all have cut your ties to Angel since he took over Wolfram & Hart, but I’m guessing you heard what happened in LA two days ago.” Lorne said, resting his head on his hand. They heard all right; it was called a terrorist attack, it was being referred to as the “Hell A” incident. Half the city was leveled, and there was no sign of what did it. “Things have been bad in LA this past year, that was the result.”

“You did that?” Xander asked incredulously. “I thought you were a good demon.”

“I am, I know that you think Angel and the rest of us went to the dark side, but we didn’t. Not at first.” Lorne said, trying to form the words. “We tried to change it, to make Evil Inc. a force for good. We were so stupid.”

“Indeed, I tried to tell you this before.” Illyria said looking around. “The Wolf, Ram and Hart cannot be turned from the darkness. Even Spike saw that.” Lorne tried to stop her from blurting it out, but it was too late.

“Spike?” Buffy asked, her face turning pale. “What do you mean Spike? What Spike?”

“He was a white haired vampire, very strong for a half breed.” Illyria said, her monotonous voice not letting the rest of the people in the room know that she missed him.

“I don’t know what kind of sick joke this is, but Spike is dead and has been since last year.” Buffy gritted through her teeth.

“This isn’t a joke puddin’.” Lorne said, looking sadly at the slayer. “Spike was alive again. And he was with us most of this past year.” Buffy refused to hear this.

“You’re lying, I saw him burn up in the Hellmouth. How could he be with you and Angel?” Buffy asked, disbelievingly.

“The amulet that he used to close the Hellmouth was sent to Wolfram & Hart, it fell out of a delivery and his essence was released. He spent three months as a ghost, till he became corporeal again.”

“That’s not possible, if Spike was around then he would’ve been looking for me and Dawn.”

“He wanted to, he really did, but he couldn’t.” Lorne said, hating to break the poor girl’s heart. “He and I went drinking one night and he sang and I read him.”

“Singing? Reading?” Giles asked, perplexed.

“I’m psychic, I read people’s minds and futures when I hear them sing.” Lorne said, explaining. “I read his thoughts. He remembered his time with you, and he remembered your last words to him. He didn’t believe you, I’m sorry, but he didn’t. He was afraid that you were just saying it to make him feel better when he died. He thought that if he came back you wouldn’t take him back, or do a repeat of the year you came back from the dead, or that you’d take your last words back, that you’d never love him. And when he saw that you were dating some guy named the Immortal, I guess he thought it was over”

“No!” Buffy said, shaking her head as tears welled up in her eyes, flat out refusing to believe what she was hearing. “He believed me. He-he just said that to get me out of there. He believed me!”

“I’m sorry.” Lorne said, hating every second of this.

“No, no, no, no! Even if, IF, that was true and Spike didn’t come looking for me, Andrew went to LA a few months ago.” She said victoriously. “Andrew would’ve seen him and told me about it, he can’t keep a secret to save his life. Go on Andrew, tell him he’s nuts!”

The Scoobies looked at Andrew for his side of the story. He held eye contact with the group and then hung his head in shame.

“Andrew?” Dawn asked, staring incredulously at Andrew.

“Andrew?” Buffy asked, her voice wavering. “Andrew!”

The young Watcher looked up at the Slayer’s forceful tone, the guilty look on his face said it all. Andrew mumbled. “I’m sorry. He made me promise not to tell.”

“No, this isn’t happening.” Buffy said, realizing it was true. “I have to see him, talk to him.”

“I’m afraid that’s another bit of bad news.” Lorne said, taking a deep breath. This was gonna be hard. “Angel came up with this plan to take the Senior Partners on. They were using a secret society of powerful demons called the Circle of the Black Thorn to run all their evil schemes on earth. Angel said that if we took them out, it would bring all of Wolfram & Hart’s plans to a screeching halt. But the Senior Partners wouldn’t let us get away with it, they’d do anything to completely destroy those involved. Myself, Illyria, Gunn, Wesley, Spike and Angel killed all the members of the Circle, and then the real trouble started.”


***Flashback***

Lorne trudged towards his car, his mind in turmoil. He killed a man; maybe not a good man but he had killed him anyway. He lost his faith in “the good fight”, the price was too high. Angel was right; he didn’t spend his life obsessed with good and evil, he just wanted to make everybody happy, after losing everything and everyone he cared about he lost his innocence and his will to be a champion. And now he was walking away from his friends as the biggest fight they had ever been involved in was coming. He knew he was taking the coward’s way out, but he just couldn’t take losing what he cared about anymore.

LA was deserted; apparently the humans got the hint that something bad was coming. The sight of the, normally busy, LA streets now empty sent shivers down Lorne’s back. He had to hurry, before he changed his mind. He had almost reached his car when something ran into him; he looked up and saw a familiar pair of purple eyes and brown hair.

“Groosalugg?” Lorne said, climbing to his feet.

“Lorne! Good to see you old friend.” Groo said, shaking his hand.
“What are you doing here?” Lorne asked, noticing a sword in his hand.

“The coven that took me in said that a powerful force of evil was coming to this city. I though that I might be of some use.”

“I guess they could use your help.” Lorne said, turning away.

“Why are you here, Lorne? Are you on some mission, where are Angel, Cordelia and the others?”

“Sorry to break this to you, Groo baby, but Cordelia’s gone.”

“What?! How, what did this?!” Groo demanded, enraged that his former princess was dead.

“She was possessed by a fallen Power and it sent her into a coma, she never woke up.” Lorne said, sadly recalling one of his many lost friends.

“And Angel? Fred? Gunn? Wesley? Where are they?!” Groo asked, his heart breaking at the news of Cordy.

“Probably fighting that evil force, or dead.” Lorne said, almost inaudibly. Groo grabbed the lapels of Lorne’s jacket and shook him.

“Why aren’t you with them? What are you doing?” Groo asked fiercely.

“I’m leaving.” Lorne said.

“You’re leaving them to fight alone?” Groo asked incredulously.

“We tried to fight Wolfram & Hart, and it took Cordelia and Fred. I can’t do it anymore, Groo.”

“You can’t just give up! You have to fight!”

“I TRIED DAMN IT!” Lorne shouted. “I tried to fight the good fight, I tried to make a difference! And it cost me Cordelia, Fred and my self-respect! It’s just not worth it anymore!”

“All the times you helped Angel, all the lives you helped save, and they aren’t worth it? Cordelia once said something that made me realize what it means to be a champion; all it takes for evil to prosper is for good men to do nothing.” Groo said, as Lorne looked away. “You can’t just abandon them. If you do, then everything they fought for was in vain, and you’re no better than the servants of the evil that took our friends. You do nothing, and you let evil win. I can’t watch that happen.”

Lorne looked at his car, barely 20 feet away; he could just get inside, turn the key and leave this unsavory life forever. He could escape and just go back to doing what he loved: singing. No battles to the death, no dismemberment, no watching people dying, just making beautiful music. But he couldn’t; deep down he knew he couldn’t. He remembered Fred’s agony, Cordelia’s sacrifice, everything they’d been through. He looked at Groo, and his expression hardened. Distasteful or not, these people were his friends. He hated this lifestyle, but he loved them. He wasn’t going to let them get slaughtered. He wasn’t going to let the Senior Partners get away with this.

“You got an extra sword?” Lorne asked his mind made up.

“No, but I have an axe.” Groo said, handing it to him. They ran through the rain towards the alley near Hyperion, and, most likely, their death. They came up behind Angel, Spike, Gunn and Illyria as the massive horde of demons charged.

“Oh my.” Groo said, staring at the legions of beasts.

“This is nothin’. The Halloween party, now that was hell.” Lorne said drolly.

They heard Angel yell, “Let’s go to work!” and the battle began.

Angel began slashing through a few of the Fell Brethren’s warriors and a large frog looking demon. Spike snapped the necks of a few Voynok demons. Gunn, even injured, managed to take out a Kith’ harn demons. Illyria smashed through the ranks of monsters, fueled by her rage at loosing Wesley. Lorne began hacking through some of Sebassis’ soldiers, while Groo slashed into a group of Suvolte demons.

“Come on you buggers!” Spike shouted as he smashed a Lubber demon with a trashcan. The bleached vamp ran and helped Angel with a horde of Sebassis’ troops after the Mohra vaporized. “Need some help, Broody pants?”

“Like I need your help.” Angel snickered as they hacked them apart, barely avoiding the poison darts.

Gunn chopped off head after head of the demons that charged him, exhaustion and his wounds were beginning to wear him down. It wouldn’t be long before he succumbed to the fight. Gunn was surrounded by tall Deevak demons, this was it. Gunn raised his axe and prepared for his last fight, but the tallest demon snuck behind him and cut his throat mid swing.

“GUNN!” Lorne shouted as the demon then plunged his knife into Gunn’s stomach and twisted it. Angel and Spike ran over to the fallen soldier as Illyria held off the monsters, but they were too late.

“Gunn, stay with us, Gunn!” Angel shouted, but the eyes of his comrade were already glazed over. The former lawyer and street fighter shoved his axe into the souled vamp’s hand and whispered a final message.

“I’m sorry.” Charles Gunn’s last words held so much meaning. So many regrets. Not being able to stop his sister from being turned, loosing people on the streets, letting Fred die. He was trying to say he was sorry, hoping that some higher power or the people he would’ve died to bring back would forgive him. The loss ignited a new wave of rage in the survivors, they weren’t battling for their survival anymore, now they just wanted to send as many of these bastards back to Hell as they could before they were struck down.

Angel and Groosalugg were swung their swords as dozens of demons charged the two champions. Having a sword fight with one opponent is hard, but fighting fifteen at once is next to impossible.

“This isn’t looking well for us.” Groo said, trying desperately to fend off the horde of creatures.

“We probably aren’t going to live through this.” Angel said, as he swung his sword and slashed an arm off a large insect demon. “But we can take most of these bastards down with us.”

“Agreed, old friend!” Groo said as he ran his sword into the head of a demon that looked like a cross between a lion and a vulture. The two champions fought on against the creatures, until suddenly they all backed off. The two warriors raised their swords, not knowing what to expect. The demons that faced them stepped aside to reveal a giant snake, its head as the size of a small car and its body reached down the alley and around the corner. “Oh dear.”

“Well, good thing I’m not afraid of snakes.” Angel said nervously. The giant snake hissed angrily at them, baring fangs as long as their swords. The huge viper lunged forward; the vampire and half demon jumped out of the way barely missing the fangs. The snake reared up and watched as the two potential snacks, waiting for the right moment to strike. Angel and Groosalugg moved from side to side, but the huge serpent followed every movement. In a flash the giant snake wrapped its coils around the two champions and squeezed them till they felt a few ribs break. The massive hissing beast’s head came closer to its prey, the huge yellow eyes looking hungrily at the two defenders. It hissed and opened its jaws and lunged at them. They clamped their eyes shut and felt something hit them, but they were still alive. They opened their eyes to see Lorne standing over them with his axe and the snake’s severed head laying on the ground.

“Thank you, Lorne.” Groo said, as he and Angel extricated themselves from the snake’s coils.

“Yeah,” Angel said, looking at Lorne. “Duck!” Angel picked up a dagger one of the demons dropped and threw it at Lorne. The green demon ducked and the knife flew into the throat of the hulking rhinoceros monster that had sneaked up on Lorne.

“Thanks.” Lorne said, as a wave Sahrvin charged at them.

Illyria may not have been the all-powerful god she was, but she had enough strength in her to pulverize her enemies. She had completely snapped, the grief of now having lost Wesley and Gunn sent her into a rage. She struck anything that moved, her strength causing her fists and feet to go right through the bodies of her adversaries. A Grox’lar beast came at her, she knocked his head off. A two-headed Cyclops came from the left, she punched his chest in. A fire devil came right at her, she threw him through a wall. Demon after demon kept attacking and they all ended up with gaping wounds or missing heads.

Spike was having trouble with his part of this fight, mostly because he was the only one besides Illyria who didn’t have a weapon. He was pretty good at hand to hand combat but after you punch someone in the face a few hundred times you start having trouble fighting. A trio of Cyvus Vail’s Kith’harn demons and a Grappler demon had him cornered, he jumped up onto a dumpster trying to get out of the way of their weapons. The demons climbed up after him, but were met with kicks upside the head. The bleached vamp swung of a drainpipe and landed by a pile of steel re-bars, now he had a weapon. He faced off again and beat the attackers with the steel bar until it bent on one end. He was winning the fight, when a huge demon about fifteen feet tall with a mace lumbered forward. The creature swung its mace forward and smashed the dumpster he had previously climbed on. Spike ran at the monster and whacked its leg with the bar to no effect. The monster swung the mace again making a huge hole in the ground as Spike rolled out of the way. He grabbed another re-bar and charged it again. He ran behind the huge creature and with all his strength he drove the steel bars right through its legs. The monstrosity howled in pain and fell over. Spike jumped up onto a fire escape and kicked the things head as he got up. The creature fell forward and Spike saw the chance. The ladder was right over the creature’s head, so the souled vampire jumped onto the ladder and it came rolling down and crushed into the monster’s skull.

The group of champions continued to fight as more demons flooded the alley. The ground was littered with dozens of bodies of dead demons, but they just kept coming. In the three hours since the fight started, Gunn had fallen; at least 400 demons were slaughtered but there were thousands more where they came from. They had to fall back.

“RETREAT!” Angel ordered, as the dragon let loose a fireball into the alley. The Fang Gang escaped the alley before the fire hit, but half the demons in the alley didn’t. The five warriors hopped a fence and ran as the army regrouped.

“There’s so bloody many of them, even the Hellmouth didn’t have this many.” Spike said, wiping the blood from his eyes.

“I told you it’d be hell.” Angel said looking back to see if they were being followed. “And just incase this isn’t enough, someone released the Failsafe before the office collapsed.”

“The Wolf, Ram and Hart have a truly impressive host.” Illyria said, as the demons began chasing them.

“Yeah, but I wish they weren’t so impressive. Oh God damn it!” Angel said as he saw the dead end of the alley.

“Now what?” Spike asked, as the mob of hell beasts closed in.

“Angelcakes, it’s been a pleasure.” Lorne said as the second assault on Wolfram & Hart’s army began. The second wave of demons was even more vicious than the first, even Illyria was getting out of breath from the fight. 12 zombies armed with stakes had backed Angel into a corner. Zombies weren’t smart, but they were a force to be reckoned with if there were enough of them. Angel was about to raise his sword, when suddenly something flew into the crowd of undead. Angel saw a figure maneuvering amongst the zombies with great ease. In a minute, the zombies had been reduced to a pile of body parts, giving Angel a clear view of their attacker.

“Hey.” Conner said, raising a large crowbar.

“What the hell are you doing here?!” Angel asked outraged.

“You gotta do what you can to protect your family, and that’s what I’m doing!” Conner said, swinging the crowbar into the face of a giant vulture.

“Conner, get the hell out of here!” Angel ordered, thrusting his sword through the chest of a demon with no mouth.

“Sorry, can’t.” Conner said smashing the crowbar into a Sahrvin’s jaw. “Gotta save my dad’s ass!”

“GO HOME NOW!” Angel shouted, both to be heard over the roars of the demons and to show Conner that he was serious. Conner stared at him for a moment, then sneered. The young man raised his crowbar and charged at his father.

“DUCK!” Conner yelled to his father. Angel ducked down, letting Conner to bash in the head of the demon sneaking up on the vampire.

“Thanks.” Angel said as Conner turned to face him.

“You’re welcome.” Conner said, gloating. Suddenly an earsplitting roar grabbed the attention of the father and son. They looked up and saw the dragon swoop down towards them. Angel jumped out of the way, as the monster swooped at him. The vampire looked at the dragon and saw that Conner hadn’t gotten out of the way in time. The beast had Conner in one of its talons. It flew up high above the battle and then just let go of Conner. Angel watched helplessly as his boy dropped over a hundred feet and lost sight of him as he fell behind a building.

“COOOOOONNEEEEER!!!” Angel screamed in anguish. He tried to run to his son, but a blast of flames blocked his path. He looked up and saw the dragon swooping around again. “Come on you bastard!

The dragon swooped down for another fireball, but Angel was ready. As it circled, Angel ran up a fire escape and stood on the roof of the building it neared. The great beast struck at the vampire and missed, Angel jumped onto its back and ran his sword into one of its eyes. The dragon roared in anger and pain, and Angel answered by stabbing its other eye. The monster thrashed at the vampire blindly, sending fire into the army of demons. Angel avoided the flames as the dragon breathed out blast after blast in hope of killing the champion. Angel rode the monster for five minutes, tricking it into incinerating half of the demonic legion. But luck couldn’t last forever. Angel lost his grip on the dragon’s head and fell into another wave of flames from the monster.

“Angel!” Lorne called, seeing souled vampire vanish into the fire. The dragon’s bleeding finally became too much and it collapsed on its cohorts. The dragon crushed the demons nearest to them, allowing them to run for it. They ran as fast as they could towards the Hyperion, hoping the army wouldn’t find them before they could plan their next move.

“Angel and Gunn are dead, the armies of the Wolf, Ram and Hart will not waste time finding us. What is the next course of action?” Illyria asked.

“I agree with this strange blue person, we must come up with a strategy.” Groo said, wiping blood from his sword.

“We have a plan.” Spike said, surprising the group. “Angel said if he didn’t survive this fight, I was supposed to bring the survivors here. There’s sewer access in the basement, we can get out of the city that way.”

“I’m lovin’ that plan.” Lorne said.

“A strategic withdrawal is acceptable.” Illyria said, as if they needed her permission to go with the plan. Suddenly they heard a faint roaring coming from outside.

“I think we should go!” Lorne said as they ran towards the basement. They came to the trapdoor as they heard the stampede of monsters getting closer. Groo pulled open the door and Illyria and Lorne descended into the sewers. Spike held the door open for Groo, and looked down after them.

“Spikester, come on!” Lorne called, but the vampire didn’t move an inch. “What are you waiting for?”

“I’m not coming with you.” Spike said, a sadness and fire in his eyes.

“What are you talking about?”

“I went out in a blaze of glory a year ago, and I’m going to now.”

“You can’t beat them! You won’t survive!” Lorne shouted at the vampire.

“I know, but you will, and they will.” Spike said, thinking of his favorite girls.

“What do you plan to do, keep hacking till one of them gets lucky?” Lorne asked incredulously.

“No, Angel took care of it.” Spike said, smirking. “He packed the hotel with a surprise for those buggers, and it needs someone to spring it. If you get out, go see Buffy for me. Tell them I love them, and me and Peaches went out as heroes.”

“I don’t know you, but you are a true champion.” Groo said, looking at Spike with pride.

“Farewell Spike, you would have made a superb pet.” Illyria said, in as affectionate a statement as she could make.

“Give ‘em hell, Spike. Give ‘em hell!” Lorne said, knowing he couldn’t change his mind. Spike gave them a mock salute and closed the door. The three demons ran through the sewers as they heard all hell break loose above.

“Whatever Angel left, I hope it packs a punch.” Lorne said as they ran through the tunnels.

Groo asked as they ran, “What sort of trap could possibly stop such a huge number of—”

BOOM!!!

They stopped as they heard a huge explosion above, wondering what Spike or the army had just done. They turned behind them and saw a light coming around the corner, and the smell of smoke. They began running as fast as they could when they realized that a huge fireball came barreling down the tunnel after them. They saw an opening at the end of the tunnel, it was an outlet drain. They were out of the city! They jumped out the pipe and into a river as a huge wall of flame burst through the pipe after them.

“Yeeeuuuuck!” Lorne sputtered as he surfaced. “Come on, let’s get to the shore!”

The three of them swam ashore, smelling to high heaven from the sewer water.

“That was unpleasant.” Illyria stated, picking a piece of soaked paper off her suit.

“Indeed. It reminds me of the scum pits of Ur and… Holy Tarkna! ” Groo said, pointing back to the city. The three surviving members of Angel Investigations saw LA in ruins. They were a mile away and they could still see the fires. Pillars of smoke rose from the city, making the storm clouds seem even darker.

“My God.” Lorne said, realizing that his only home in this dimension was burning to the ground.

“What do we do now?” Groo asked, jarring Lorne from his thoughts.

“Well, Spike asked us to get a message to the Slayer that he and Angel talked about. I guess we better honor his wish.” Lorne said, sadly.

***Present***

“No.” Buffy gaped at him, not believing what she had just been told.

“I’m sorry, Sugar. He loved you more than life itself, and if I could bring him back I would.” Lorne said, hating the look of anguish on the young blonde and brunette’s faces. “I’m gonna open a night club down the street, maybe you can stop by some time.”

“We might do that.” Buffy said, her voice barely above a whisper.

“I’m sorry,” Lorne said, motioning to Illyria and Groo that they should leave. “If there’s anything I can do…” Lorne started, but decided against it. He just turned and walked out the door. The Scoobies sat in silence; Buffy hadn’t looked so lost since Glory took Dawn, they were afraid that she had gone catatonic again.

“I’m sorry,” Buffy said standing up, trying to hide her tears. “I’m sorry to cut our big anniversary party short, but I need to go to bed.”

“We understand.” Willow said, trying to sound comforting. “We’ll take care of the dishes, you and Dawn get some rest.”

“Thank you.” Buffy said, walking quickly into her room and locking the door behind her. She couldn’t believe it. Angel was gone, he’d always thought he’d be there and he was gone. They might not have been together, and even suspected he’d switched to the other side, but to think that her first love was gone was like being punched in the gut. And Spike. Spike was alive, and he had been for almost a year. And he didn’t come to her because he didn’t believe her. They had a chance to start over. He was back. And now he was gone again. She had so many chances to tell him that she loved him, so many times she could’ve made him believe it. But it was too late. They could’ve been together, she could’ve spent the last few months in his arms. She could’ve told him she meant it, and that she still meant it. She loved him, somewhere along the wayside she fell in love with him and he’d never know it.

“Why? Why?” Buffy sobbed into her pillow. “Why didn’t you come for me? Why couldn’t I tell you I loved you before it was too late? Why couldn’t I save you? Why did you have to be such a damn hero?” She whispered in pain and despair. She just lay in her bed, clutching her pillow wishing it was Spike in her arms, crying her heart out. Her heart was breaking for the two vampires who she had loved; they were gone and this time they wouldn’t come back.


To be continued. (You don’t really think I’m ending it there, do you?)





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