~~~~

"Spike! Open this door right now, Spike I know you're in there. Open
up!" Nic banged on the apartment door, causing the neighbors to peer
out at her. She heard what sounded like a crash on the other side of
the door, then she heard Spike cursing as he flung the door open.



"Bloody hell woman, what do you want?" Nic just glared at him as she
pushed past him and entered the apartment. She made her way to the
nearby bar and poured herself a shot of whiskey, which she quickly
gulped down. Spike had closed the door and stood with his arms folded
across his chest, staring at the woman who was making herself quite
at home.



"Why the hell didn't you tell me?"



"Sorry, I'm not following you luv, and I'm too tired to try..."



"Buffy!"



"What about her?" Spike asked suddenly with interest.



"Why didn't you tell me the 'bitch' that you've been ranting on and
on about, is called Buffy. The same Buffy whose best friend happens
to be the redhead who invited us to sit at her table tonight. A table
where her friends, including 'BUFFY' sat."



"It didn't occur to me, why what happened?"



"Oh nothing, someone inquired as to why you weren't joining us, and I
took it upon myself to excuse you. So I told them about how you're
all bad moody over some BITCH, and yes I used the word BITCH," Nic
said through gritted teeth. "Who you love but she treats you like
shit, and is a silly unworthy git for not realizing just what a great
guy you are." Nic said with a smile and then gulped down another
shot. Suddenly Spike burst into laughter. "It's not funny." Nic
declared as she too began giggling despite herself.



"Oh like hell it isn't, and what did Buffy say?" Spike asked still
chuckling.



"Nothing, everyone got quiet after that, all except some chit named
Anya, who was so kind to inform me that Buffy, who was sitting right
beside me, just so happened to be the very BITCH I was referring to."

Spike's laughter grew louder as he fell to the floor, clutching his
stomach. Nic looked down at him shaking her head and then took
another shot of whiskey.

~~~~

"So," Willow said as she and Buffy sat on Buffy's bed eating gooey
chocolate fudge ice cream. "When Spike's strutting around acting all
cocky, and claiming to be 'The Big Bad', he's telling the truth?"



"Yep, and I'm usually scream it to him whenever we..you know?" Buffy
said taking a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth.



"OH MY GOD!!" Willow squealed with laughter as she fell back onto the
bed and covered her face with a pillow. Buffy giggled too. "Oh
Buffy," Willow said recovering from her fit. "Why didn't you ever
tell me before now?"



"Well for one I didn't think you'd be this cool about it."



"Come on Buffy, you're an adult so you can pretty much do what you
want, with whomever you want, and hello we already know you have a
thing for vampires..."



"One vampire..." Buffy began to recite the same statement she has
professed to Spike after their first night together, and then took
note of the doubtful look Willow was shooting her. "Ok, two
vampires..." She mumbled.



"It's ok," Willow reassured her friend. "And speaking of the two
vampires...Who's the bigger monster in bed?"



"Willow!" Buffy said wide eyed as they both fell into another fit of
laughter


~~~~

"Needless to say, I was very embarrassed, not that you give a damn."
Nic said as she lounged on the couch beside Spike.



"And you know I really don't." Spike said with a smirk as he now
sipped on the glass of whiskey he had fixed.



"I don't know what upset her more, what I said or the fact that you
and I are close enough that you'd tell me personal stuff like that."
Spike gave her a confused look. "The girl was jealous."



"Ok, luv I'm definitely cutting you off, you've had too much."



"No, I'm serious the girl was miffed. As the night progressed and we
all got over my foot in the mouth, whenever I talked about you and us
working together, she got pissed."



"Really?" Spike asked in disbelief.



"Yes, trust me on this not only am I a woman, and know the way women
think, I also have been alive for over 5000 years, so I'm experienced
in the matters of the heart. The girl's got it bad for you whether
she's willing to admit it or not. So?"



"So what?"



"What are you going to do about it?" Nic asked.

~~~~

"You should go over there." Willow said as she looked with disgust at
the spoonful of ice cream she held.



"Whmmm?" Buffy mumble as she swallowed down the last of her ice cream.



"You should go over to Spike's." Willow repeated.



"What? No. You think I should? I can't." Buffy said shaking her head.



"Why not, you know you want to."



"Two reasons, one, I don't have his address and he doesn't want me to
have it remember, and two she's probably there, right now." Buffy
said beginning to pout again.



"Ah, so what. His address in right in my address book, in my side
table drawer, if you open it up and get out of the book, technically
I haven't given it to you. And you know Spike will be happy to see
you. As for Nic she's not interested in Spike, trust me."



"And how do you know that?"



"Cause...ah well she kind of slipped me her number." Willow said with
a sly smile. Buffy's eyes grew wide as did the grin on her face.



"You're kidding right?" Willow shook her head no.

~~~~

"So what's up with 'Red', you think she'd like to go out sometime?"
Nic asked.



"Nope."



"Oh she's straight huh? Funny I was getting a vibe that she liked a
softer, better smelling species." Nic asked with a hint of
disappointment.



"No." Spike said and then finished his drink. "She's gay, but very in
love with a great bird."



"Ahhh, I see. Oh well." Nic said with a shrug as she stood and made
her way to the door. Spike didn't move from his spot on the
couch. "Well you think she and her girlfriend would..." Nic
questioned but saw the look Spike was giving her and recanted. "Just
asking," She said as she opened the door. "Goodnight." She said
before closing the door after her.


~~~~

Sometime Later:

'Bloody hell, I'm gonna kill her. Sure she's stronger then I am and
have a few fighting jabs I haven't mastered yet, but I'm gonna kill
her. Just who in the hell does she think she is, think she can come
and go as she pleases? Think I'll jump whenever she wants, well not
this time, not with me. I have done way too much of that. But she's
not gonna leave me alone, I'll never get any peace at this rate. So,
it would be best if I just go ahead and take her out, and be done
with her' Spike thought as he moved to the door. "This better be good
Nic, cause if not I'm gonna..." Spike growled as he yanked open the
door. He was stunned by what he saw standing on the other
side. "Buffy?" He stared at her, dazed. "Sorry luv wasn't expecting
it to be you."



"I got that." Buffy said with a small smile and then looked down at
her feet.



"Is something wrong pet?" Spike question as his gaze bore into
her. "Is it Dawn?" He asked in a near panic, which Buffy noticed and
appreciated.



"No, Dawn's fine. She's spending the weekend with friends." Buffy
reassured and smiled as she saw Spike take a big sigh of relief.



"So, what brings you by, lu...Buffy?" Spike correctly, quickly
remembering that she hated it when he called her that. Buffy's began
fidgeting her hands as if stalling in order to think of something to
say, she finally settled for a semi truth.



"Well, I heard through the grapevine you had a new pad, so I came by
to check it out." She said with a smile and hint of jest in her
voice. Spike just stared at her expressionless. "Truth is," Buffy
said as she looked back down at her feet. "I've missed you. Missed
just talking with you."



"Naw, I don't think so." Spike said as he looked as if he were in
deep thought, contemplating what she had said. "Try again." Buffy
looked up at him with a confused look.



"Excuse me?"



"The truth, that wasn't it, and that's all I want to hear from you
from now on. The truth. I'm not gonna play this game with you anymore
Buffy. So, unless you're here to speak the truth, the whole truth and
nothing but...I need to get back to bed, I gotta work tomorrow
night." Buffy looked at him stunned not only but his words but by his
demeanor, she could see that he had meant what he had said. Buffy's
defensive nature wouldn't allow her to be submissive, so she tried
turning the tables.



"And just what do you think the truth is, Spikey?" She asked pushing
up her chin a bit, which made Spike soften and smile a bit, for he
knew it was just a part of her tough girl act and just a cover.



"Let's, see, truth...truth is you didn't come all the way over here
because you missed me. You came because that pretty little head of
yours got filled with naughty thoughts of Nic and I. You were
wondering if I was kissing her the way I kiss you, if I touched her
the way I touched you, if she screamed out the same things you do
when I lick the right spot." Spike spoke in a low sensual tone as he
leaned out the doorway and leered at her, causing Buffy's mouth to go
dry despite that fact that she was fuming at the 'truths' he spat at
her. "Truth is you really came over here hoping that I'd take you in
my home and my bed, actually you wouldn't care if I took you right
here in the hall, would you? So long as you could get the 'touch'.
Truth is you love me and it scares the hell out of you, and not
because I'm an evil thing, no it was never that. Nor is it because
you think your super friends will get pissed at you, though I thought
for a long time that was the reason, but that's not it either. You're
scared to love me because you know that we're perfect together. With
me you feel security and fulfillment in every way that you've never
felt with anyone else. When we're together you feel utter and
complete bliss, and you're afraid that if you admit and give into it,
it'll go away. I'll go away and leave you alone, like all the others."



"You're wrong. What we had it was good I'll give you that but it was
wrong. You're a vampire and me, I'm a vampire slayer. Spike we're
never gonna have a crypt for two, with a picket white fence. We can
never have that happily ever after you've dreamed up in you warped
dead brain. You want the truth, truth is I feel lust and disgust for
you, I lust you and allow you to defile me," Spike shot her a glare
at her reference to their 'relationship' but didn't say anything but
allowed her to finish. "Then comes the disgust and shame. Truth is I
want it to stop, I don't want to want you. I want to have a normal
life, with a normal guy." Buffy said defiantly, hoping it sound more
convincing aloud then it did in her head. 'It's better this way, this
is how it has to be' she repeated over and over in her head.



"So that's the truth as you see it? You just want a normal life and a
normal guy?" Spike asked eyeing her suspiciously, unconvinced and
losing interest in the entire conversation, which surprised him. It
wasn't that long ago he hung on her every word, and thrived on their
arguments.



"That's right, the whole truth and nothing but the truth." Buffy said
and then folded her arms across her chest.



"Ok, then let me make it easier for you." with that Spike closed the
door in her face and turned without a second thought and made his way
back to his bed. Buffy stood in the hall for a long moment. At first
she thought he had gone to get something to give to her, but
realization soon dawned on her that he wasn't coming back. He had
shut her out, out of his home and mostly out of his life, which is
exactly what she had just told him she wanted. 'So why the hell does
it hurt so much?' she wondered as she turned and slowly headed
towards the elevator.





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