Lily was in the early stages of labour, when it happened. One moment she was on her bed in a hospital room, surrounded by concerned nurses who were assuring her that Spike was on his way and then… She wasn’t.

Her reality turned inside out, as she realized that…

The four concerned nurses around her bed, were, in fact, vampires. They were holding her down for the doctor, the one that had seemed so nice and who now, held a large knife and was slicing…

The pain of what was being done to her, had broken the thrall.

Lily struggled, desperately; looking round the room, frantically trying to spot something she could use. Everything she saw, made her feel even worse, if that were possible.

How long had she been there?

There was no window. No television. No DVDs. No books. What had she been doing? All those nights snuggling with Spike, watching films, none of it had been real. What had she really been doing?

She couldn’t move and Lilith was pulling Jennifer Anne, out of Lily’s ruined abdomen.

Lily struggled harder, trying for a glimpse of her baby’s face, knowing she’d probably never get another chance. Lilith strode to the door.

“One of you girls, sire that for me, would you.” She said, gesturing towards Lily, as she swept out, clutching her bloodstained grandchild.

Adrenaline flooded Lily’s system and she managed to get her leg free for a few seconds. It was enough. With a spectacular kick, she broke the neck of the dark-haired girl that had held her by the ankle. In the resulting confusion, Lily managed to similarly incapacitate the other three. She clutched at the door frame, breathing hard into the pain and looked down at the four slayer-vampires, with broken necks, littering the floor. Not dust but unable to move until their spines healed, they lay, helplessly watching as Lily made her move.

* * * * *

Spike was dreaming. He had laid Lily’s limp body on the bed and Lorne was telling him that the only thing he could do for her, was to share her Orpheus dream, by feeding.

He didn’t trust himself. What if he lost control? Lorne was assuring him that he wouldn’t, when he heard Lily murmuring.

“Please, Spike, just do it.” She breathed, softly, in his ear.

The smell of her blood was flooding his senses and he took her in his arms and gently kissed her throat. His fangs had slipped into her before he realized it and he started to draw her blood, hot and so sweet, into his mouth.

She was whispering to him, telling him how much she loved him, urging him on as he drank her…

* * * * *

Buffy stepped through the portal. She looked around at the new dimension and realized that it looked exactly the same as the one she’d just left.

She’d left at sunrise so she’d have the advantage of daylight, for the maximum number of hours. Dalton had drawn up a plan of the cellar of Lilith’s lair, explaining where Lily and Spike were likely to be.

Buffy had decided to go in through the house, rather than use the tunnel entrance, through the stable block. Dalton had told her that the tunnel was heavily guarded and that the tight space, coupled with booby traps, made it a hard place to fight in.

The main house, although fortified, was not as well guarded. Lilith, it seemed, relied, too heavily, on her reputation and a few barricades, to keep people out.

The windows were bricked up. Buffy had been prepared for that, what she hadn’t been prepared for, were the screams.

Piercing screams of unimaginable agony, thankfully muffled by the brick work. Buffy swore, as she kicked the front door in, what the hell was happening in there?

An eerie silence greeted her, as she cautiously stepped into the house. Whatever had caused all that screaming had clearly stopped.

She had expected to be overwhelmed by vampire signatures, after all, an entire household full, was the biggest nest she’d ever been in. Instead, it felt like there was only one; Spike.

She heard a baby crying, upstairs somewhere.

She wanted to go straight to Spike but she could tell that he and the baby were in different directions. She switched on her torch and played the beam around the walls until she’d located the light switch.

Once the light was on, she realized that she was standing in dust. A great many vampires had been finished off, in here.

She followed the sound of the baby.

* * * * *

Spike felt great. He’d drunk his fill and so much energy was flooding his body that he felt like he could fly. He hadn’t felt this good since…

No.

His demon retreated, leaving his human soul to deal with what he had done.

Please, no.

Lily lay, drained, in his arms. She felt cool against his skin, now warm from her blood.

She was dead and he had killed her. His demon, starving, had tricked him - with a vision of the past - into draining her.

He had bagged his third slayer.

When he had first gone to Sunnydale, looking for Buffy, he had never dreamed that killing a slayer could ever cause him so much pain.

* * * * *

Buffy followed the sound of crying, all the way to the master bedroom.

The walls of the room were lined with tapestries. Beautifully hand worked, incredibly life-like, depicting hideous scenes and images. Orgies of sex and bloodletting. Unimaginably vicious depictions of torture. So realistic, they had to have been drawn from life. Someone had a hell of a hobby.

The baby was on the huge bed, naked, smeared with blood and surrounded in dust. She’d stopped crying and was now whimpering, quietly. Buffy picked her up. She felt cold.

Improvising, Buffy stripped a pillow case from one of the pillows at the head of the bed and gently wrapped the baby in it.

“Are you Jennifer Anne?” She asked, softly, looking into the baby’s big blue eyes. “We need to find your mom and dad. Find out what the hell happened here.”

“The new Guardian is born.” The voice came from behind Buffy.

Buffy spun around, ready to fight, despite her fragile burden.

“But… you died.” She said, gazing at the Guardian. The last time she had seen her, the woman had died at the hands of Caleb. “Are you this dimension’s Guardian?”

“No, Buffy. In all dimensions where humans walk and slayers exist, I am the only Guardian. I have lived for millennia, did you really imagine that I could be killed so easily, by that monstrous boy child?”

“Well, yeah, that is…”

“Neither he nor your charming soul mate, were capable of that.”

“Soul mate… you mean Spike? He tried to kill you?”

The Guardian smiled.

“No. I sought him out, immediately following the restoration of his soul. I had to be certain that he would live through the trauma.

“For generations, I awaited his birth. He was perfect; born of an uncalled potential - Anne, sired by an uncalled potential - Drusilla, a vampire so strong and yet so flawed - and because of her flaws, he retained so much of himself, despite the siring.

“Best of all, his soul was paired with yours, one who could become a slayer. I overruled the usual powers and you, against all expectations, were chosen. His love for you, would change his attitude to slayers. He had to be protected, he had to fulfil his destiny.”

“Closing the Hellmouth?” Buffy asked.

“No. Ensuring the birth of the new Guardian, by joining with his slayer kinswoman.”

“It was predestined?”

“Yes. In only one of hundreds of dimensions, the chain of decisions would add up to the birth of the new guardian.”

“There are dimensions where Spike never met Lily?” Buffy asked, cradling Jennifer Anne under her jacket, for warmth, and feeling her snuggle, contentedly.

“There are dimensions where you and he are pair-bonded and he is incapable of touching any other. There are dimensions where he chose to stay, fight and die with his grand-sire. Every decision changes future outcomes.”

Buffy shivered at the thought of Spike, dying in L.A., with her never even knowing that he had survived the Hellmouth.

“I have to find him and Lily.” Buffy said, a sense of urgency sweeping over her.

She set off, in search of the hidden staircase which would lead her to the cellar. She hoped she wouldn’t have to fight while holding the baby but there was no way she was leaving her.

* * * * *

Spike had used his new strength to break the two chains, which had connected his manacles to the cell wall and, with a sickening lurch of his insides, realized that the chain around his neck, wasn’t there. Had never been there. Lilith had made him imagine it was there.

He gathered Lily into his arms and started to weep, quietly.

“Spike?” William called to him, through the grating. “Spike, listen to me.”

“Shut up,” Spike growled, “Or I’ll come in there and put you out of your misery.

William shut up.

That was how Buffy found Spike. After believing him to be dead - mourning him - for almost two years, she had found him; sitting in the doorway of a cell, holding a dead slayer and sobbing.

“Spike?”

He looked up at her, blankly.

“You are my Spike, aren’t you? You’re not the one from this dimension?”

“No, Mistress Buffy,” The voice came from behind the door of the cell next to Spike’s, “That would be me.”

“Spike,” Buffy was still addressing her Spike, “What did Lilith do?”

“Lilith?” He finally spoke, his voice thick with tears.

“To Lily? What did that bitch do to her?”

“I did it.” Spike replied, turning his head away, shamed.

“I don’t believe that.” Buffy took in the bloodstained gown that Lily was wearing, most of the stains at waist level. She was fairly certain that she knew what had been done and she really didn’t want to think about it.

“It’s true.” Spike said, dully. He gently turned Lily’s head, so that Buffy could see his bite mark on her throat. He looked up and, for the first time, noticed Jennifer Anne, in Buffy’s arms. “Is that…?” He asked.

“I think so. I found her upstairs. All the vampires here are dust, except for you two. What the hell happened, Spike?”

“I told you, the new Guardian.” The voice came from behind Buffy.

“You.” Spike breathed, “The White Ghost. You fed me, after…”

“Yes.”

“Helped to clear my mind, for a while.”

“To ensure you survived to join with the vampire slayer, Lily.”

“And now, I’ve killed her.” Spike said, bitterly.

“You did nothing that she didn’t want. The vampire, Lilith dealt the fatal blow, when she tried to steal the child.”

“A wound like that, didn’t kill me.” Buffy said, without thinking. Spike winced. “I mean…slayer healing…” Buffy said, realizing that she was making Spike feel worse.

“You, Buffy, are the strongest slayer that ever lived and, you are the one who found the scythe; pulled it from the rock. Such is its power, that you, the first slayer to touch it for millennia, have been rendered unkillable.” The Guardian explained. “Where is the scythe?” She asked, abruptly, giving Buffy no chance to question her previous statement.

“In Rome, there’s no way I’d have got it through customs.” Buffy said, unwilling to admit that Giles had it locked up in a safe.

“Ah, your watcher has it. That is one of the reasons a new Guardian was needed.”

“What about Lily?” Spike said, emotion choking his voice, “You were just using her?”

“In your dimension, you chose to leave your grand-sire to his battle and journeyed, instead, to the country of your birth. As that decision was made, Lily’s future was mapped out. Were it not for Lilith, she would have survived. The blame lies with whoever opened the portal, on your dimension‘s side of the stones.”

“All I know is, she got free, came for me and I murdered her.”

“That’s not how it happened.” The Guardian said, calmly. “Your captive brother can prove that to you.”

Buffy went to Spike and crouched next to him. She’d missed him so much and now he was here, in front of her, she didn’t know what to say to him.

“Stay away from me,” He growled.

“Don’t you want to see your beautiful daughter?” She asked.

“She’s better off not knowing me, they both are.”

“Both..?”

“Her and Dawn. You didn’t know?” He added, at her gasp of surprise.

“No but I should have. It makes perfect sense.”

“Keep them away from me. I’m just a killer. I always hurt the girl, Buffy…” He started to sob, again.

Buffy didn’t know what to do. Spike was starting to sound the way he had in the school basement.

“The Guardian says that the other Spike can help.” She said.

“William.” Spike said, quietly. “He can’t help, no one can. I deserve to be staked.

“At least come and see what he has to say, first.” Buffy said, putting her hand on his shoulder.

Spike finally lay Lily gently on the floor and got up. Buffy put her arm around him but he shrugged her off.

William’s cell door was solid and had a hatch, roughly cut in the middle. It was locked from the outside. Buffy broke the lock and opened the door.

William, instinctively backed away, as Buffy, Spike and The Guardian walked into his tiny room.

“Forgive my manners,” William said, apologetically, “This is the first time I’ve had guests.”

Buffy looked around and whistled, softly.

“Willow would have a cow, if she saw this.” She said, admiringly.

William’s room was a weird mixture of technology and mysticism. He had a computer system and a broadband hook up, which looked normal enough but he also had a cable, one end going into the computer, the other end split into two and attached to a scrying glass and a vial of blood. The cable pulsed red every so often. Definitely not normal.

“Show him.” The Guardian said.

“I record the images from the scrying glass, onto my hard drive,“ William said, proudly, busying himself with the keyboard.

The image on the screen, swirled and resolved itself into a moving image of Lily, while she was on her bed, in the waiting room.

Spike watched, tears streaming down his face, as Lilith, alerted by Nikki, that Lily had gone into labour and, realizing that she’d lose the thrall, produced a knife and started cutting.

Buffy gripped Spike’s hand, as, fighting nausea, she watched Lilith perform a primitive caesarean, dragging little Jennifer Anne from her mother.

She almost cheered, watching as Lily got her leg free and swiftly broke the neck of a vampire who looked suspiciously like Faith.

Spike scrubbed the tears from his eyes as he watched Lily stagger across to his cell, open the door and crawl into his lap.

“Please, Spike, just do it.” Lily whispered, hoarsely, “Don’t let them sire me. Just finish it, use my blood to get out of here and save Jennifer Anne.”

Spike’s jaw clenched and he clutched at Buffy‘s hand; he watched the screen as Lily pulled his mouth to her throat. He had been so emaciated, from starvation, that he could hardly believe he had needed to be persuaded, to feed.

“Please, I love you so much, Spike. You have to get out of here. I’m dying anyway. Please.”

On the screen, Spike finally succumbed to temptation and sank his fangs into Lily. She appeared to feel no pain and, in fact, had a small smile on her face, as Spike fed and she died.

Buffy was crying, now and Spike put his arm around her.

“I love you.” She said, through her tears.

“Can I hold Jennifer Anne?” He asked, not wanting to respond to the amazing thing she’d just said, in case he’d got it wrong.

Buffy handed the baby to him, without a word.

Jennifer Anne, opened her eyes and gazed sleepily up at her father.

The Guardian gently led Buffy out of William’s room and into the main area of the cellar.

“I can make him forget.” She said, quietly.

“Huh?” Buffy responded.

“Spike. I can make him forget all this pain. Meeting Lily, fathering Jennifer Anne, Lilith, all of this. I can put him back to how he was; raise the new Guardian, myself. It’s up to you. Decide, Buffy, what do you want?”

Buffy couldn’t quite believe what she was being offered. A chance to be with Spike, without the shadow of Lily. She could actually fix it so that Spike would be happy, again.

She was about to make the most important decision of her life…

 

 

 

 

 



Chapter End Notes:
Any of you who had grown to quite like Lily, don't be too gloomy, there are other AUs where she is alive and well and happily slaying. In any dimension where Spike got his soul, she got the coma but, as the Guardian said, there's only one reality where Lily has a relationship and a baby with Spike.



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