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Buffy's POV

Buffy prayed for her ordeal to end soon. Xander's gentleness, feigned as it may have been, had the benefit of letting her pretend. She could have shut her eyes and thought of someone else. Anyone else. But soon, Xander had turned rough. Enough to frighten her.

Buffy wanted to fight back. To say no. To scream. But she'd found herself paralysed. Frozen with fear. Buffy felt like a rag doll as Xander had positioned them over the side of the bed, and began taking what he wanted. Without a care or concern for her.
Buffy put on an expression that could be construed as want, then gave herself over. Soon, she felt faint. Even a little sleepy. Until she heard his smug voice in her ear.

“Like that, baby?” Xander asked. “Like me fucking you?”
Buffy knew Xander wasn't going to stop. Not until he got what he wanted. She decided playing along would be the safest way to go. For now. Her time would come.

“Yeah,” Buffy said. Through gritted teeth. She feigned pleasure by throwing her head back and sighing. She heard Xander click his teeth together from behind her. Unhappily. Felt his body stiffen behind her. His nails dug into her hands.

“Yeah....what?” Xander asked.

His voice was dangerous now. It sent a chill through Buffy. She hastened to soothe his fragile ego.

“I like you... fucking me,” Buffy said. As huskily as she could manage. Her voice trembled.

“Knew it,” Xander said. Smugly. He paused to catch his breath. Sighed. “Knew it the first time I laid eyes on you. Remember?”

It all came back to Buffy. How she'd tripped over in her new high heels she'd overloaded her credit card for and fallen into Xander's arms.

“Can I have you?” he'd asked.

His eyes had been soft and brown. Wide and hopeful.
Buffy had laughed at his goofy pick up line, held up her hand, and showed him her ring finger.

“Married,” she'd told him. “Sorry.”

She'd seen how his face fell a moment later. A dark shadow fall across it. Only for a moment. So quickly, Buffy had convinced herself she'd imagined it. And when William had introduced his wife to his new boss, they'd shared a good laugh. But Xander's eyes had never left Buffy all evening. At the time, she'd been flattered by his interest.

“I remember,” Buffy said. Trembling. Her voice trembled as well.
“Yeah?” Xander asked. He picked her up, then shifted them to the bed. “Remind me.”

Buffy gasped when Xander dropped her down, pulling her slightly back to allow her to ride him. But Xander kept Buffy's arms pinned. The passing of control was no more than illusory. Buffy knew she had no choice.

“Right before the... gala,” Buffy said. Moving her hips back and forth.

“What gala?” Xander asked. Taking control by gripping her hips with his hand. Moving her at a pace he desired. His voice was conversational. Buffy knew this was yet another one of Xander's powerplays. Yet another mindfuck.

“The...” Buffy said. Taking a deep breath. She forced herself to focus on the memory. Sought to distract herself.

“The gala we threw... to...fix...” Buffy said. Gulping in heavy breaths.

“Fix?” Xander asked. Sighing.

“Fix the museum,” Buffy managed to ground out.

“Yeah,” Xander said. Taking a deep breath.

The conversation stalled as they both returned to their respective tasks. Xander trying to take as much pleasure as he could for himself and Buffy trying to make it through this.

Telling herself it was okay. That she was okay. That she was just protecting herself. And then, much to her chagrin, Xander spoke again.

“Couldn't believe you were with him,” Xander muttered. “Fucking loser.”

Buffy felt it all then: Guilt. Shame. Rage. But she knew she couldn't let it out. Not yet. She searched for a way to change the subject. And fell upon a tried and tested method: Playing to the male ego.

“Ohhhh,” Buffy sighed. Throwing her hair back. “Oh Xander. Don't stop. That feels good.”

But Xander seemed to have a one-track mind.

“What did you see in him any way?” Xander wondered. “I didn't think he could even... get it up.”

Buffy felt her anger flare. She leaned back and looked at Xander. Disdainfully.

“Maybe we could talk about this later,” Buffy hissed.
Xander only chuckled. He bent forward, trapping her underneath him. Buffy felt his hand take a hold of her hip, holding her in place.

“Gonna fuck you like this now,” Xander rasped. In her ear. “You wanna be fucked like this? Huh?”

Buffy knew what Xander wanted. To exercise his power over her. To dominate her. Buffy refused to rise to his bait. Xander responded by grabbing her by the hair.

“Answer me,” Xander growled. Angrily. His brown eyes, which were once so soft, had turned cold and hard.

“Yeah,” Buffy said. Hoping that would mollify him.
When Xander didn't respond, Buffy found herself shaking like a leaf. She forced herself to speak again.

“I wanna be fucked like this,” Buffy added.

Doing her best Britney Spears meets porn star impression.
Xander's smile was slow. And wicked. It made her shiver. Buffy knew she had no choice. That there would be no revenge without survival. So she played the part.

As she had before. Telling him exactly what he wanted to hear. Making him believe she wanted him. Telling him she was close. That he was making her cum. Until he was, at last, finished.





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