Disclaimer: But of course, all mine. Damn, still not true, but a girl can dream…So for the record, me own nothing so please don’t sue; there’s no copyright infringement intended, just plain fun meant with this.
Oh, and the dialogue appearing in this story is not from me but taken from the episode this one’s been inspired from.


Feedback: All feedback, comments or anything else you might want to share is welcome and can be sent to LadySet@gmx.net
 
Author’s notes: Actually this is just an idea that got stuck inside my mind about one key scene during ‘Smashed’. Well, if you just thought of the key scene, and I mean The Key Scene, you might try again. Unless you thought of the same scene as I was. Spike’s POV.
 
Summary/Spoilers: Spoilers for ‘Smashed’ (think the scene! *evil grin*). Do you too think that love on first sight would be something wonderful? Ever wondered to know what Spike thinks of this? Have fun reading!
 
 
Love at first sight
 
by Belladonna
 
Have you ever encountered this phenomenon everybody calls ‘Love at first sight’? Felt this feeling of complete and utter happiness at just laying your eyes upon something special, very special?
 
Did you ever imagined or dared to dream that something like this would be happening to you in your lifetime? Or rather in your un-lifetime in my case?
 
Well, I for my part hadn’t but then none of us do until that very moment; that moment that should change your life forever and completely. I know it did change mine.
 
And you know, what can I say; as always it started with a girl, in this case a special girl for she was the Slayer.
 
~/~
 
When I accidentally hit her back in the park that day or rather night it felt like a bloody revelation to me. Not the hitting part, but more the part of where I didn’t feel any pain.
 
Yeah, you’ve heard right – no pain.
 
The bleedin’ chip inside my head didn’t go off as usually, leaving me those other times with a friggin’ headache that hurt like hell. But zero, not even a small blip from the blasted thing. It remained completely silent that night.
 
Of course I couldn’t let her know that; it wasn’t the exact scenery I’d imagined for that to happen so many sleepless days before. It just hadn’t felt right.
 
So, what did I do? I faked it. And since I already had bloody well enough first-hand experience at this excruciating pain of what it should feel like that moment, I was really convincing too. That had been the worst acting job ever when looked at it afterwards, but she bought it.
 
You see, I really had thought that this stupid piece of hardware had run out of batteries or something but the how didn’t exactly matter to me. The important thing had been that it no longer seemed to work. And that was also the problem at it.
 
Since the chip still worked perfectly, it just apparently hadn’t on her.
 
And that made me curious. There had to be something wrong with that, with the soddin’ thing but all the other rather unsuccessful tries later that night had left me with a real bad migraine and no Aspirin or Tylenol to soothe it.
 
The only conclusion I came to was that it has had a malfunction, which of course left me with another problem right there. How was I to be sure of that? I couldn’t quite take a look at it myself and there was only one person I could turn to with that.
 
Turned out he still lived where I’d encountered him first, placing my order for the ‘bot. Really stupid, I would’ve moved, with me being a really bad, bad evil vampire knowing where I’d be living and on top of that having been invited to that place.
 
I could hear them talking about some unimportant stuff through the door and unsuspecting that they were and evil that I still was, I decided to surprise them a bit.
 
It definitely had been worth it, their frightened faces at their first sight of me caused me to chuckle inwardly. They instantly jumped up from their chairs and backed away from me, huddling together like the children they were to me; and food should the chip once more decide to not work on them too.
 
“Hello, it’s called knocking.“ One of them said clearly annoyed, tried to act all manly in front of me but I knew that he already had wet his pants. His name had been Andrew which I later found out.
 
“Knock knock, robot boy.” I said directly towards Warren, completely ignoring the others. He had been the reason I’d come to them and the others didn’t interest me at all. “Need you to look at my chip.”
 
Jonathan, that was the third one of the annoying little twits, looked up to me. That’s right, he had looked up to me because he’s what, the size of a dwarf?
 
“Is that like British slang or something? ’Cause we’re not—“
“In my head…” you stupid idiot, I added in my mind. “…the chip in my head.”
 
“We’re kind of in the middle of something.” Warren said, probably trying to stall some more time or one more stupid attempt of getting me out from their basement. Well, good luck at that since he was several feet away from me and dared not to come closer. And it didn’t matter to me for this was more important than his little geek thing. I had come because of a reason.
 
“Well, you can play holodeck another time.” That got their attention. Didn’t think I’d know any of that, huh? “Right now, I’m in charge.”
 
I knew that they’d not be afraid any longer. Humans have that annoying tendency to try and act oh-so bravely and all hero-like especially when they are up to their heads in trouble. So I decided to show them, give them some example of who had to say anything around that very moment.
 
That had also been the moment when I’d spotted him, seen him for the first time.
 
“Yeah? What are you going to do if we don’t especially feel like maybe playing your—“ From the corner of my eyes I saw Warren pale when he stopped himself mid-sentence. Or rather when he saw what I now was holding in my hands.
 
I’ve told you about those defining moments before, didn’t I? Well, that one definitely was, for me. I felt nervous, like I had felt before my first kill and it excited me. Could I still have sweat, I’d probably have had sweat spots underneath my armpits the size of England, not to mention of me also in that case standing in a major puddle of sweat pooling at my feet right now.
 
He just had stood there out in the open, so vulnerable and innocent. It really shocked me to see how carelessly they had treated him and I wanted nothing more than to get him home with me under glass and only look at him. But it did feel so much better to hold him once more and finally again between my fingers. And I, the big bad evil vampire had butterflies in my stomach at this, who’d thought that?
 
“What are… Wait, what are you doing?” Now there truly was panic evident in Warren’s voice and the others shrieked horrified. They’d probably felt I was doing something sacrilegious of what, but the careless ones had been them. How could they just let him stand there without protection? Had they no idea what precious and highly valuable item they had in him?
 
“Examine my chip or else Mister…” I tried to play casual there, acting cool and pretending to have no idea at all about what really I was holding there in front of them but inside me my fingertips already tingled at the feeling of him in my hand. And it felt so awesome, like I’ve never felt before. “…Fett here is the first to die.”
 
I also pretended to twist his head off, an action that probably would’ve pained me bloody more than these nerds and that one was my best acting job ever. Their eyes were transfixed onto the Fett, glued on him in my hands and the fear that radiated in store high waves from them caused me to laugh harder inside. Oh, it felt so good to hold him finally in my hands once more. I had bloody wanted to have him since the first time I’d seen him in that fan catalogue back then.
 
“Hey, all right.” Jonathan again, pleading in his whining voice for the figurine’s life. “Let’s not do anything crazy here.”
 
“That’s a limited edition, 1979 mint condition Boba Fett.” That had been the annoying Andrew guy again.
 
To say it with one of Buffy’s terms, duh, as if I hadn’t known that already!
 
That had been why I had picked him up in the first place. All that other worthless crap on the table would never have had that same effect on me. Him, this priceless possession in their hands, it caused cold shivers to run down my spine. It simply was too much to bear and I tightened my grip protectively around him.
 
But of course they misunderstood, well that had been intended but this time completely involuntarily.
 
“All right, dude… chill. You can still make it right.” Warren acted like one of those cops trying to solve a hostage situation which it was. I slightly chuckled. I held the Fett hostage, it was bloody laughable. They were morons and that once more had been proof enough for me. But the Fett in my hands… “You know you don’t want to do this.”
 
He had no idea. From the moment on I had first set sight on him, I had wanted him, badly and this feeling intensified now. He would be mine, mine once again…
 
“What I want…” I said, adding mentally ‘is to leave this place with the Fett in my hands’ but then I snapped out of that reverie back to reality. That little thing in my hands had me mesmerized completely “is answers, nimrod.”
 
“Right.” There was the negotiator voice again. “But you don’t want to hurt the Fett, ’cause man, you’re not comin’ back from that. You don’t just do that and walk away.”
 
“That right? Let’s find out.” I still acted all way too cool but I’d never, and I mean never would’ve damaged the figure. Not after I had found it in the first place. That thing was valuable a lot. Of course, they didn’t need to know that, so I’ve put up my threatening face – actually I have several of them and took me bloody long enough to cultivate them all without being able to see them in the mirror and all that, but for now one sufficed – and glared dangerously at Warren.
 
It had the desired effect immediately. Warren started to sweat again and the other’s eyes never left the Fett in my hands, their eyes glued on him fearfully.
 
“One second. “Warren said nervously, which had been en enormous understatement and he pulled the others back for one of these group things. That was fine with me, now we finally were alone together.
 
Ignoring these little geeks, I studied the Fett. He was flawless and in perfect shape, every detail carefully crafted and probably hand painted. I unconsciously licked my lips in appreciation, planning on not leaving without him. Now that was true beauty, not some gore and mayhem I’d used to like back then. No, this was the real thing and it felt like electricity shooting through my fingertips as I traced along the lines of the figurine. I was so excited, not even killing those two Slayers had felt so good. This was much more than awesome and I had the feeling like back then once more inside of me, like then when I was watching that brilliant movie for the first time. I felt awesome for I felt the power of the Fett.
 
Fearfully they glanced towards me while they still debated, probably to make sure that I didn’t make anything ‘harmful’ to him. To scare them, I squeeze the Fett once more and they almost fainted at that. I’d have done that too, if that was my figure. Which it soon would be, all mine, I added mentally.
 
And it would be; how could I ever give him back, now that I have held him in my hands? Knowing that I had had him and then been forced to give him back, turn him over to again. They wouldn’t notice if I’d just put him in my pocket. Possessing him meant more than the malfunctioning bloody chip for me and I would have him, even if it would be the last thing to do. That was a collector’s item, limited edition for god’s sake!
 
“I think we can work something out. I’ll take a look at your chip.” Warren’s voice snapped me out of my wonderful daydream. And do I need to tell you that that really pissed me off?” “It’ll be a deal. We scratch your back, you scratch—“
 
“I’m not scratching your anything.” I shot back, growling. How dare that pissant interrupting my special moment!  “You do what I tell you, that’s the deal. Deal?”
 
Please let them forget about the Fett, so that I can take him, I prayed silently.
 
“Deal.” Warren said. I noticed the glances of all three of them resting on the figure in my hand, fearful glances and I cursed. Damn, God must’ve hated me really that night. I sighed silently, taking another longing glance at the Fett in my hand. So close and so far away. A true fan’s nightmare.
 
“Then let’s go.” I told them instead, having made the toughest decision of my un-life and then tossed the Fett towards Andrew.

I gave him back, really turned him over! I didn’t just give him back, I gave him up! How could I even look at myself anymore in the mirror having done that? Me, one of these mentioned true fans?!! I even have a uniform in my closet back in the crypt to wear for the next bloody Star Wars marathon on the telly!! Good thing that those conventions are being held in a closed space without sunlight.
 
Of course, then the looking in the bloody mirror part wasn’t that big a problem for me.
 
I followed Warren towards his lab and only managed to see that boy catching the figure, examining him frantically. I had wanted to scream that I hadn’t touched him, hadn’t scratched or damaged him and probably would’ve treated him better that these losers had done. But I had to go, the reason for my visit coming back to my mind. Damn, why had I had to find the Fett in their possession on exactly that night?
 
I hung my head low as I walked after Warren out of the room and silently I still had been able to hear Andrew soothing the Fett; my Fett!
 
“Oh! It’s okay, it’s okay. It’ll be fine.“ He talked to the Fett, comforting him and my heart broke. I realized that I wouldn’t have him. Well my chip was important, and finding out why it had stopped working on Buffy one time but still perfectly on the others was too.

Still, it was the Fett we are talking about, limited edition! In excellent condition and in my hands! Well, it would be fine like that doofus said, but as long as the Fett was in their hands, I
wouldn’t.
 
~/~
 
Now, you hate stories with these unhappy endings? Well, I too. And this was definitely one of the unhappiest moments of my un-life and it hurt this fan’s heart. It was almost as painful like that one time I had to wait in line during the day to get these bloody tickets for Episode One. And these burns hurt, mind you, a lot!
 
So kiddies I’ll give you a bleedin’ happy end for this. And it stands right on my nightstand, under a glass dome protected from dust and other nasty harmful things. These nerds didn’t even miss it after all, under that other worthless crap they think valuable. Hey, I also might find some of these first edition comic books there some day; of course these idiots probably wouldn’t have bothered to even put them in plastic bags, sealed of course afterwards.
 
But my thoughts always return to him and the memories of that first time during the premiere back in the 1977’s. That had been bloody good cinematic entertainment, and the critics guy from that one newspaper had been a bloody good snack there too. How dare he even be thinking of writing that this movie would be a sucker at earnings, not to mention that he thought the story sucked? Idiot, had no idea of true height in entertainment! Well, now he has a perfectly good view of height of plant growth from the lower level.
 
That moment and afterwards this other special one had both been a bloody revelation, the moment I first laid my eyes on him and it was love at first sight.
 
I smile at him standing there in his limited edition-mint condition glory and in my imagination, the Fett smiles back from under his glass cover. This year, that sunburn for the line for Episode Two won’t be that nasty after all, since I now have the Fett to be lined up next to the Vader and the whole happy bunch of them.
 
 
~fin~
 
 
There, finished. It might be not exactly good but this crazy idea kept bugging me, so I had to write it (and think of it written while being really late or early in the morning, depends on your viewpoint). Call it a product of lack of sleep, an overdose of sweets and having watched ‘Smashed’ over and over again. Like said, it's S/B, just with a slight twist on the B part;) Bella





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