Disclaimer: Nothing is mine. Characters belong to Joss's twisted little mind. Just borrowing.

Okay, here's the situation:
This story starts in the middle of "Something Blue." So far in this episode, Giles is blind, Xander is a demon magnet, and Buffy and Spike are engaged.
So far in the season: Spike escaped from the mystery soldiers and has sought refuge at Giles' apartment in exchange for info about the underground facility. His chip is active, but he hasn't discovered that he can fight demons, yet. Riley and D'Hoffryn don't exist in this story.
I hope you like it! Please review!

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Chapter 1

It was the happiest day of his unlife. He had asked his Slayer to marry him and she had said yes! He was so exhilarated that if his heart was pumping, he felt for sure it would burst right out of his chest. And he seemed to not be able to get enough of her. If she left his side for even a moment and he wasn’t touching her, he was overwhelmed with emptiness. He was going to marry her! Spike and Buffy forever!

Spike was lost in these thoughts with Buffy sitting on his lap babbling about wedding invitations when the whelp and his girl ran in. The couple started going off about demons following them and what not. Spike really didn’t care all that much, but he noticed Buffy was concerned so he did his best to pay attention and help out. He hated when his Slayer was all tense and worried. Hmm. He’d have to do something to help her release that tension.

~~~~~

Buffy knew she had to be in research-mode to help Giles with his sight problem and be in Slayer-mode to help Xander with his demon problem, but all her senses were focused on how her sexy fiancé was rubbing his fingers along the palm of her hand. She wanted everyone to be as happy as she was! Thank goodness Anya asked the question -

“Why are you two holding hands?”

Buffy beamed with joy. “I guess we can’t keep it a secret forever. We’re getting married!”

Xander looked back and forth between the two of them. “How? What? How?”

“Three excellent questions,” Giles chimed in.

There was a commotion while everyone adjusted to the happy news. Suddenly Xander started to freak out the way he does when he actually has a coherent thought. After a little bit of discussion they figured out that Willow had cast some kind of spell that had caused Giles to go blind and made Xander a demon magnet. Thank goodness Will hadn’t done anything to mess with Buffy’s world. Things were just too perfect right now.

They decided to all go find Will and straighten this out. She hoped that it wouldn’t take very long. She was seriously aching for some alone time with her vampire.

Xander suggested they take Giles’ car, so they all piled in, with Xander driving and Anya in the back seat with her and Spike. It was a tiny car, so Buffy got to sit on Spike’s lap. He whispered naughty and dirty things in her ear the whole time and kept rubbing the inside of her thigh. She noticed Anya was giving them a nasty look and was squished over against the window on her side.

What a hypocrite, Buffy thought. The way she talks about sex with Xander, you’d think she could handle seeing two people in love show a little *pda.*

When they got to her dorm room, Willow was just sitting on her bed, curled up with a pillow. Poor Willow. Everybody started talking to her at once, and Buffy could tell she was feeling attacked. Giles finally took control of the situation and explained to Will what was happening. He also mentioned something about Buffy and Spike’s engagement, which upset Buffy because she wanted to be the one to tell. Besides, what did it have to do with the spell?

Willow looked horrified at what Giles had told her and confessed to performing a spell the night before. She insisted, though, that the things that were happening were not her intension.

Just then, Spike, who had moved to look out the window, spoke up. “Uh, fellas? You might want to figure out how to reverse this and right quick. We have about three demons heading right for this building.”

Buffy darted to his side to check it out. Sure enough, three big ugly hairy things were walking straight across the quad, heading for Xander, no doubt.

Buffy turned to Willow. “Can you reverse this, Will?”

“I think so. But I don’t want to screw up again. Giles, can you help me?”

“Of course I will,” Giles reassured her. “How long do you think it will take?”

“Well, we have to gather the ingredients and make sure the words are right. Half hour? An hour at the max.”

Buffy was eyeing the demons who were causing the people outside to scatter. “We need to get these things off campus. Xander, come with me.”

The Slayer grabbed Xander by the arm and headed down the hallway toward the back stairs. Anya and Spike followed close behind. Both Buffy and Xander turned around.

“Anya, go home. You don’t need to be here,” Xander said.

“Spike, go back to Giles‘. I don’t want you hurt,” Buffy said at the same time.

Both Anya and Spike spoke up at the same time as well. “You’re not going anywhere without me.”

So as not to waste any more time arguing, the four of them ran together out of the building. As predicted, the demons followed Xander and the others off campus. Buffy led them into the woods to get them away from the population. Just as the hairy beasts were gaining on them, they came upon a small cave-like opening in a hillside. Buffy pushed Xander and Anya inside. She saw a large boulder nearby that was big enough to cover the opening.

“Spike, help me with this!” It took their combined strengths to move the big rock the ten feet to the cave door. With Xander and Anya out of immediate harms way, she turned to Spike. “Stay over there and out of the way. I’ve got these guys.”

“Be careful, baby,” Spike told her and backed out of sight.

The three demons were on her quick, and they didn’t fight fair. They all attacked at once. With a few perfectly timed kicks and punches she was able to slow a couple of them down, but the third one grabbed her from behind and started choking her with its arm. The Slayer began to see spots in front of her eyes, when suddenly, the demon was off of her. She turned around quickly and saw Spike had the demon on the ground and was pummeling him hard in the face. He then grabbed a rock laying nearby and smashed its face in.

“Spike! Are you ok? Why didn’t your chip fire?”

“I don’t know - Hey! I can hurt demons! Yeah!” Spike jumped up and flew at one of the remaining two. Buffy got to the other one and with speed and precision, both killed their respective monsters.

Spike was jumping up and down with excitement. “Did you see that, luv? I can still hurt things! Come here,” Spike grabbed her and kissed her hard. “We have to celebrate,” he said running his hand over her ass. Buffy wrapped her arms around his neck. She had been wanting him all day. This seemed like as a good a time as any.

“Back to Giles‘,” she told him.

~~~~~

When they banged in through the apartment door together, Spike already had his tongue so deep down her throat that he knew she was struggling to breathe. As he slammed the door shut behind them, the Slayer tightened her grip around his neck and wrapped her legs around his waist.

“Slayer,” he growled at her as he pulled away slightly and let her catch her breath. The scent of her arousal, which had been stimulating his senses all day, was almost overwhelming now. His jeans had stretched so much over his hardness that if he didn’t take them off soon he was going to be in serious pain.

Spike began kissing her ear and moved down to her neck.

“My Slayer,” her mumbled against her jugular.

“Take me know, Spike,” she answered. “I love you so much.”

He gripped her tighter and practically ran her up the stairs to the Watcher’s bedroom. He laid her down on the bed without separating from her and only broke the kiss to take off her top and let her take off her bra and his shirt.

He fell back down on her and took a breast into his mouth. She fits so perfectly, he thought. Everything about her is so perfect. He played with her nipple with his tongue while massaging the other breast, and she moaned a heavenly moan that told him everything was good and right.

She began to squirm underneath him and he realized she was attempting to remove her skirt. He raised off her slightly and finished the job, tearing off her pretty white panties as well.

This time when he dropped down on her, it was to kiss her again. His hand kneaded her breast before sliding down her stomach and rubbing between her legs. Her body responded with a buck against his fingers, instantly forcing two of them into her. Spike twisted and pumped his fingers and felt her slayer muscles tighten around them. He started moving his kisses down her body until his tongue found her clit.

Buffy started making noises that he had never heard before. Her hands clamped down on his head and gripped his platinum curls hard. He removed his fingers and replaced them with his tongue.

The true taste of a slayer, he thought as he played with her and drank up every bit of juice that flowed. When her breathing suddenly quickened and her muscles flinched and tightened even more, he stopped quickly and she let out a disappointing yelp.

“No-no stop-” she whimpered.

“We’re doing this together, Slayer,” Spike told her as he took off his jeans to finally set himself free.

“Yes,” Buffy sighed as he lowered himself onto her and brushed the tip of his pre-cum soaked cock against her opening. She grabbed the back of his neck and pulled his ear to her mouth. “Fuck me now baby,” she whispered, and he tore into her as far as he could go.

Just then a jolt moved through him and everything felt wrong. He looked into the Slayer’s eyes and saw the same shock and disbelief that he felt reflected back at him.

“Wait…” escaped his lips and he stayed still, trying to process why the emotions he felt the last few hours were gone and how exactly he was going to get out of this bedroom (and Buffy) without getting staked.

His cock involuntarily twitched inside of her and she let out a little gasp. He put his hands on either side of her shoulders and lifted his chest off of hers and slowly started to pull out, eyeing her cautiously.

The Slayer’s eyes narrowed suddenly and he felt her muscles around his dick tighten so much that he could no longer move. Then those beautiful muscles did something extraordinary. They started kneading and massaging him until he was back in her all the way. Spike breathed in an unnecessary gasp of air and tried to say something, but could think on nothing to say.

“More,” Buffy said harshly and moved her hands down his back to grab his ass and keep him there. She started moving those inner muscles again making Spike whimper and fall back down on her. Soon he couldn’t stay still anymore and took the control back from her. He started pumping into her and getting lost in every little moan, sigh, and grunt she made. The demon in his brain kept trying to tell him something. Something about wrong and stop and she’s going to kill you, but the man still in his body had completely taken over and was screaming at the monster to shut up.

Then he heard the Slayer say, “Harder,” in a voice that was so cold and sharp that he knew his only will was to follow her command. He moved his arms under hers and gripped her shoulders from behind. He buried his face in the pillow next to her head and started slamming into her so hard that he thought he would break them both. It didn’t take long for him to feel his climax coming, and he knew by her breathing that she was just about there, too. Just as he came, he felt an odd dull pain in his neck and caught the whiff of his own blood.

Finally the room fell silent of his scream and his muscles stopped working, forcing his complete collapse on top of the Slayer. It took a minute for his brain to start functioning again. When it did, though, he had a hundred thoughts at once.

What the hell just happened - she’s gonna kill me - the witch’s spell, stupid bint - my god that was bloody amazing - wait, why - she bit me!

He pushed himself up with one hand and brought the other up to his neck. He looked at that hand and saw a small amount of blood.

“You bit me,” Spike said to her.

“Get off me,” Buffy’s voice had the same harsh coldness that it had when she said the words more and harder.

He looked into her eyes, not knowing exactly what he was searching for. He felt a sudden wave of fear run through him. But what was stranger than the fear was the reason it was there. Spike wasn’t afraid of being staked so much as he was afraid of why that initial wave of wrongness that overwhelmed him when the witch’s spell wore off, had gone away. Fear. It was an emotion that was foreign to him, and he realized the last time he felt this way was the night Drusilla sired him. He wasn’t afraid of Dru. It was earlier that night when her was telling Cecily how he felt about her. That was the fear. Hello, William, he said to himself. He hadn’t let his human side emerge this much since his first year as a vampire. Good, was the only thought that ran through his head now.

The look he found in the Slayer’s eyes, though, said something else. Something bad.

“Off,” she said as she pushed on his chest hard, and he tumbled to the edge of the bed. She moved quickly and pulled her clothes on, stuffing her torn panties in her pocket.

She started down the stairs and Spike continued to feel that fear pulse through his dormant veins.

“Buffy,” he called out to her.

“Shut up, Spike,” she answered without turning around.

He heard the door to the apartment close, and he sat there for a few more minutes before getting dressed.


To be continued...

Chapter 2

Buffy wrapped her arms around her waist as she walked back toward the woods.

Okay - you know what - no thinking right now - brain switched to off - in fact, complete erase memory - the last day didn’t happen - the last half hour truly didn’t happen - no Spike thoughts - no sex thoughts - no sexy Spike sex thoughts - sexy? - where did that come from? - no sexy Spike! - yucky Spike - yucky Spike with soft lips and amazing tongue - Arghh!!

She clamped her hands to her head.

Evil vampire! - Evil evil - Evil murderous harmless sexy vampire…damn.

When she finally got to the cave, she remembered that she needed Spike to help her move the boulder.

“Xander! Anya! You guys okay?’ she called through a crack.

“Yeah! Still alive!” Xander shouted back. “Haven’t heard anything in a while. Back to normalsville out there?”

“Seems that way. Have you guys out of there in just a second.” Buffy put as much Slayer-strength into it as possible and managed to move the boulder a couple of feet. “That should be enough - come on.”

Anya poked her head out of the crack first and looked around. She squeezed through the opening followed closely by Xander. Buffy let out a little laugh as she started walking behind them back to town.

“What?” Xander asked turning around.

“It must have been pretty dark in there.” Buffy grinned.

“Well, yeah. Why?”

“Both of your shirts are on backwards.”

Xander blushed instantly and started stammering, “Oh, well, yeah, th-th-that’s because, well, it’s cause, we were j-j-just, you know-”

“We had sex,” Anya said for him.

“Yeah,” Buffy laughed. “Good thing your life and death situation doesn’t get in the way of your sex life.” She trotted ahead of them and let them readjust their clothes.

~~~~

By the time she got to her dorm, Buffy’s thoughts had drifted back to Spike. She hadn’t said much while walking Xander and Anya back to his basement, and she was pretty sure that Xander had noticed. Thankfully, he didn’t ask any questions, but she knew that wouldn’t last long, and the next time she saw him he would be harassing her about exactly how far it went with her and Spike. They were, after all, in love and engaged. Xander had dozens of questions behind his eyes.

Now that she was by herself again, though, she mostly kept thinking about how Spike had called out to her as she was walking out. ‘Buffy‘, he had said. She honestly couldn’t remember if he had ever said her real name before. Kinda made her mad. How dare a vampire use her name. In the demon world, she was the Slayer. Being the Slayer, she was able to separate her work from her life. Sex with Spike had blurred that line, and she knew that she had to find a way to make it solid again.

Willow engulfed her in a huge hug when she walked into their room.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I’m so so sorry!”

“Will, Will, it’s ok,” Buffy pealed Willow off of her and tried to give her a reassuring smile.

“It’s so not okay! It must have been awful, you must have felt so disgusted.”

Buffy started getting ready for bed. “No, not really,” she said quietly.

“What?”

“I mean - not at the time. Think about it, being engaged. It has nice. I was kinda, you know, happy.”

“But, after…?”

“Oh, yeah! After. That was, like, blah!”

“What can I do for you? I have to make it up, if that’s even possible. I’m already detailing Giles’ car and Xander called and demanded I cook sweet things for him for the next month. I’ll do anything, Buffy, really.”

“You know, Will, I really just want to go to bed, right now. Put this whole thing behind me.”

“Oh, okay. Sure. Of course you do. No more talky.”

Buffy got into bed and pulled the blanket tight around her neck. “Good night, Will.”

“Good night, Buff.”

~~~~

The next day, Buffy faked her way through her classes. Her previous night’s sleep had fortunately been dreamless, but the memories of her faux engagement and the… consequences… kept resurfacing during her lectures.

She remembered her body tingling the first time her kissed her. That sweet look he gave her when she told him what music she wanted at the reception. Mostly, though, she thought of the way his hands never stopped touching her. He was always rubbing his fingers or his palm over some part of her body - her waist, her leg, her cheek, her own hand. The majority of these thoughts she could brush away, though. They somehow made her happy, but she could push them down and tell herself that it was all just because of the spell.

But the memories that she couldn’t suppress were the ones about the sex. Okay, the first part, Spike going down on her - spell. Good happy spell (there was just no denying that, no matter how many ways she looked at it), but still - spell. But the next part, after the spell was broken…why? Why hadn’t she wanted it to stop? She could have stopped it at any time. In fact, Spike was the first one to pull away. But she kept him there. And told him more. And told him harder. And he complied. He did everything she told him to. And she bit him! What was that about?

It was just such wonderful control. Beautiful power. Power? Yeah, that’s what it was. Power. She had a completely helpless man (monster) in her grasp and she wanted to control him. To make him obey her. To bend his will.

She had power as the Slayer. But it’s a power that comes from fear and muscle. The power she had last night was about…what? Fear? She wasn’t afraid of anything. Surely Spike wasn’t afraid of her. Muscle? Well, yeah, muscles were involved (in fact, new and exciting muscles she didn’t even know she had). But those were used for pleasure, not pain. So what was the power she was feeling last night, and why did it make her feel so good? And make her want more…?

~~~~

The whole bloody gang was over for another Scooby meeting that night. Spike sat in a corner chair and tried to stay out of the way - mostly nobody really paid attention to him anyway, so it really wasn’t that hard. The main topics of conversation seemed to be finding out more about the soldier boys that kidnapped him and the witch’s guilt about the previous day’s spell. Red was in the kitchen all evening baking cookies (of which she only gave Spike one, and the boy must have had a whole batch).

When the Slayer came in she walked right up to Spike and handed him the ring he had given her yesterday.

“Thanks,” Spike said taking the ring from her and putting it back on his own hand. Buffy nodded and went into the kitchen to help Willow.

The rest of the evening, he watched her when he figured nobody was looking at him. Not once, though, the whole damn night, did she look at him. Not even when she was telling the Scoobies about his ability to fight demons the night before.

Don’t know what I was expecting, really, Spike thought. She stirs something up in me. Always has. That first night at the Bronze. I’d never seen a slayer before that was so…happy. So carefree. Yet she was able to get the job done. Killed my bait vamp with no trouble. There’s a reason why I can’t kill her - besides this soddin chip. What is it, though? What is it about this Slayer that makes her so different. So passionate. So sexy. So damn…powerful?

As time wore on, the group started leaving. Eventually, only Buffy remained behind with her Watcher. They didn’t seem to be talking about anything special and soon the Brit let out a big yawn that caused the Slayer to apologize and gather her things to go. Giles said goodbye to her while her was straightening up the snack dishes and didn’t see her pause in the doorway and turn to look at Spike. She stared at him for a few moments, but Spike couldn’t read anything in her eyes. He just stared back. God, I want her, spilled through his mind and he left it there. Let it sit at the front of his brain. He swam in it. Drown in it. I want her.

Then she turned and walked out.

~~~~

The Watcher had stopped tying him up at night, so Spike lay awake on the couch. He wasn’t tired, of course, but he was bored. He kept playing little slayer-sex scenarios over in his head. He imagined fucking her in her dorm room, in the Watcher’s bed again, in the cave he shared with Harmony, in the factory basement, against a large angel statue in one of the cemeteries (that was his favorite scenario). Suddenly, she was standing right next to him, and he started a new fantasy involving fucking her on the couch. Then he snapped out if it. She was standing right next to him. Didn’t hear her come in…

“Slayer,” Spike leaned up on his elbows.

“Sh,” she said quickly and grabbed his hand, pulling him up off the couch.

The Slayer had a tight grip on his hand as she led him through the dark streets.

“Where’re we going, luv?”

“I know a place,” she responded quietly.

Spike quickened his pace for a few steps until he was walking beside her. Matching her stride, it felt for a little while that they were a couple, walking down the street holding hands. Then Buffy looked down at their intertwined fingers and let go. Spike continued to walk next to her as she entered Restfield Cemetery.

This was his favorite graveyard in all of Sunnydale. It was the biggest and oldest and it had plenty of trees and crypts that made great hiding places. It must be the Slayer’s least favorite. Come to think of it, she probably doesn’t have a favorite cemetery.

Spike followed the Slayer as she wound her way around the statues and tombstones until she came to a large crypt near the northwest corner wall. It looked like most of the others except it was much more worn and had no markings or names. She stopped in front of the door and stood for a moment before bringing her leg up high and kicking it hard with the flat of her foot. A low echoing boom emanated from inside the crypt, but the door didn’t budge. She hit it several more times before stopping to catch her breath.

Spike took a step forward and put a hand on her lower back. “Let me try, pet.”

“No,” she said brushing his hand away.

He stepped back again and watched her take in a few deep breaths. She brought her leg up again and made a loud deep scream/grunt as she put all her force against the kick. It was one of the sexiest things he’d seen her do and he was hard instantly. The door banged open with a tremendous clang, and they felt a heavy sigh of air emerge from the dark space in front on them.

Buffy stood for several more moments as the dust settled. Then she turned quickly toward Spike, grabbed him by his shoulders, and tossed him into the darkness like a rag doll.

He slid across the floor and came to a stop against one of the two large pillars at the back of the room. He lay still as he watched her come into the crypt and close the door. Before his eyes adjusted to the black, she was right in front of him, pulling him up by his t-shirt and pinning him against the pillar.

Her mouth was instantly on his ear, sucking and licking. He wrapped his fingers up in her hair and pulled her lips toward his. Buffy held still before their lips could touch.

“No kissing,” she said firmly.

“What? Yes, kissing,” Spike said back just as firmly. “I like the way you taste.”

Buffy looked at him squarely in the eye and held his gaze. “I’m only going to say this once. If we do this, we do it my way. Only my way. Understand?”

“And your way doesn’t involve kissing?” Spike grinned. “Bollocks.” He pulled her in to kiss again.

Buffy pushed herself away from him and punched him hard in the jaw.

“Argh! Bloody hell! What’d you do that for?”

“I said I wasn’t going to say it twice.”

Spike took his hand off his jaw and the two stared each other down for a minute. Finally, Spike broke the silence.

“Your way.”

Buffy let a little smirk escape her lips then resumed working on his ear. She grind her body into his and he sensed her arousal. It gave him a small sense of satisfaction knowing that he could make her feel that way. After all, it was him doing it this time, not some spell. But, then again…was he really doing anything? He was standing there with a hard-on, touching her neck and back, but she was the one tonguing his ear and neck, pressing into him, and - hello! What’s this?

The Slayer had moved her hands down to his jeans and was managing to unbuckle his belt and pull his zipper down. She then dropped to her knees and pulled his pants down to his ankles. Spike was so stunned by the move, that his brain emptied of thought and he stared down at her in disbelief. Without so much as a glance back up at him, she opened her mouth and took him into her as far as she could. Spike tangled his fingers into her hair again and threw his head back in a loud moan. As her lips and tongue started to play with him, his brain remained drained, and he was able to let William come to the surface again. He felt like a boy. A boy who had finally started courting the girl of his dreams. Everything was going to be fine. He had a life ahead of him that was happy and successful and full of joy. It was all going to turn out alright as long as he kept this girl close to him. Never let her go. William felt his climax coming on as his girl worked faster.

Suddenly she stopped and Spike came screaming back to the surface, burying William somewhere so deep that he forgot for a while that he existed. The Slayer was then climbing onto him, having disposed of her jeans and panties at some point. Without so much as a tease, she dropped herself onto him so hard and fast that it caused them both to scream out in pleasurable pain.

Spike let her pump onto him a couple times, then flipped her around and pinned her against the pillar. While thrusting into her, he put his lips on her neck and felt the warmth of the blood pulsating through her veins. The beautiful pounding of her life-force caused him to vamp out and he licked her neck through his fangs.

From what seemed like far away, Spike heard the Slayer say, “Do you want to bite me, vampire?”

At that moment, they both reached their peak and Spike opened his mouth wider to plunge his teeth into her vein. Before he broke skin, though, she grabbed his head hard and pulled it back from her. She instantly tore into his neck with her own dull teeth and bit hard and violently enough to draw blood. His body started shaking all over, and she licked the blood away from the wound she had inflicted.

Soon, Buffy squirmed her way down from him and started gathering her discarded clothes. Spike pulled back his demon. He slowly turned around, pulled his jeans back up, and leaned his back against the pillar watching her. William resurfaced and brought that bloody feeling of fear back with him. Spike tried to suppress it, but instead only managed to replace the fear with sadness.

“So this is your way?” Spike growled at the Slayer. “You’ll seek me out whenever you’re feeling a bit randy, and I’m supposed to just take whatever you want to give me. Does it matter what I want?”

Buffy finished getting dressed and faced him. “I don’t know, Spike. I don’t know if I’ll even be back. What do you want from me anyway?”

Spike tried desperately to find an answer to that question. He knew he had an answer somewhere, but perhaps only William could find the words to express it. William was better at words than Spike. It suddenly occurred to him that Buffy had never met William. Then the words came.

“I want you to know me. Yes, evil vampire, sure. I am that. I’ve killed thousands of people, and if it weren’t for this chip in my brain, that’s what I would be doing today. But I do have this chip and one other new thing in my life. You. You’ve touched something in me that had been hidden for a long time. And it didn’t just start last night. I think that from the first night I saw you, you slipped under my skin. You affected everything I did, every decision I made. Why do think I started fucking Harmony? Because she knew you in high school. I know you two weren’t friends, but you had touched her life in some way, and at the time, that was the closest I could get to you. Even Dru knew that you had a piece of me. It’s why she left.” Spike walked over to Buffy and gently grasped her shoulders.

“There is a man in me somewhere, Buffy. A man who is capable of loving you in every way that you should be loved. I just need you to help me find him. And when we do, I know that you can love him back. Help me, Buffy. Please.”

Buffy let out a loud sigh and took a step back from him, causing his arms to fall back down to his sides.

“That’s very sweet, Spike. And I’m guessing that a lot of it is true. It’s a wonderful little journey we could take together. Come out skipping and smelling like roses at the end. But that’s not the way the world works. I have a woman in me, Spike. But you know what that woman sees when she looks at you? A vampire. You know what the Slayer in me sees when she looks at you? A vampire. This thing we did - it’s wrong. Every part of me says it’s wrong. But this wrongness that I feel - maybe that‘s okay. When I’m with you, the badness turns into goodness, somehow. But it’s just temporary. So I don’t know if I’ll be back. And whether or not you’re here if I do come back, well…that’s your call.”

Spike watched as she turned her back on him and walked out the door. Again. He wondered how many times he could live this scene before it breaks him. He wondered if he even wanted to find out.

~~~~

The next night during the Scooby meeting, Spike moved out of the Watcher’s apartment. Giles told the Scoobies that he was confident they had gotten all they could out of him about the mystery soldiers, and Spike was feeling a little safer on the streets now that he knew he could fight demons. Nobody asked him where he was going. Buffy didn’t even look at him. As he was walking out the door, he heard the little witch call out behind him.

“Bye, Spike.”

He turned around and gave her a little smile. “Watch those spells, Red.”

“You bet!”

Spike strolled through the streets weighing his options. He was carrying a small bag with a couple of t-shirts and a few packets of pig’s blood. He had wandered the world for the last 120 years and was amazed that he had managed to accumulate absolutely nothing. So what’s the next step?

He walked down the middle of Main Street, keeping on eye on the shadows for any soldiers that may be lurking to take him back underground. Okay, he could get the hell out of Sunnydale. Very good plan. Safe. But go where? He realized that he was completely alone. He couldn’t go find Drusilla. She would never want him back anyway. And Harmony? Even if she took him back into her bed, he would be comparing her to Buffy the whole time. And that was really no comparison….

Buffy. He thought of how she felt against his body. He soft skin and her thick hair wrapped in his fingers.

Spike stopped and looked up. He noticed he had walked himself to the entrance of Restfield Cemetery. He started toward the northwest corner.


To be continued...

Chapter 3

Buffy was bored. She wandered through the cemetery glancing at the shadows. She had only dusted one vamp in the last two nights, and was beginning to wonder if it was her reputation that was keeping them away or the rep of a few certain mystery soldiers that keep capturing demons…

She heard a noise around the other side of a crypt and slipped into Slayer-mode. She cautiously moved along the wall of the building and peaked around the other side. Then just stood and watched.

There she saw the thin muscular vampire battling a much bigger one. It was a beautiful scene. Spike moved with such speed and grace. Buffy started unwillingly comparing him to Angel. When Angel fought, it was always wham-bam. It always looked like he was fighting just to get it out of the way. All muscle, no style. Angel didn’t do style. Angelus did. Even though Angelus was the epitome of all things evil, she admired his commitment and focus. Something Angel never seemed to exhibit. But Spike… Spike was having fun. Even letting out a laugh here and there. He threw punches and kicks with a sense of dignity. The air around him seemed to slow down when he moved. He also seemed to be giving off an impossible heat. As she continued to watch the battle, she realized that the heat wasn’t coming from him, but from herself.

Spike finally had the other vamp pinned down and was sitting on his chest punching him repeatedly In the face.

“You going to dust that guy, or what?” Buffy called out from her viewpoint a few feet away.

Spike stopped a punch in mid-air and looked up at her startled. The vampire underneath him laid unconscious. Spike regained his composure quickly and smirked at her.

“No stake,” he admitted.

“Here,” Buffy tossed him her stake.

He caught it and made a move to plunge it into the vamp’s chest, then stopped.

“Whatcha waitin’ for?” Buffy started walking toward them.

Spike lowered his hand. “Well, it’s not very sporting, is it? I mean, where’s the fun in killing something if it’s not even fighting back.”

“Killing isn’t fun, Spike. It’s my job.”

“Well, it’s not mine,” he got up off the vamp and stood in front of Buffy.

“What were you fighting for, anyway?”

“Bored. I was out for a walk. Feeling kinda restless, saw this guy lurking about, so I jumped him.”

“Seems pretty careless.”

Spike raised an eyebrow to her and cocked his head, “You worried about me, Slayer? Come here to help me out?”

“I just happened by, Spike. I patrol this cemetery, you know.”

“Do you? Haven’t seen you here all week. You’re getting sloppy.”

“I am not getting slop- How would you know where I’ve been this week?”

Suddenly the big sleeping vampire wasn’t so much sleeping anymore. He jumped up behind Spike and reached out for him. Without taking his eyes off Buffy, Spike whipped his arm back around himself and drove the stake through the vamp’s chest. Buffy’s heart skipped a beat and she felt herself get all warm and wet. Wow - that’s sexy. Before the dust settled, he answered her.

“Don’t know where you’ve been. I know where you haven’t been. Here. I live here now.”

“You live here? Where?”

“I think you know the place.”

“Oh.” Buffy stood in front of Spike and let her eyes wander down to his body. Her hand involuntarily reached out and she laid her palm on his chest. “I like the way you fight.”

“Do you?”

She slid her hand down further to his waistband and untucked his t-shirt, then moved her hand back up his cool body to rest on his chest again. Spike cupped his hand on the side of her neck and rubbed his thumb along her jaw. He slowly moved his thumb to trace her lips. She took note that his fingers were incredibly soft and pictured the other things his fingers had done. She looked up into his face again and tensed up when she saw the look her was giving her. She recognized the desire, but there was something else behind it that was unfamiliar. Buffy decided that she didn’t want to look in his eyes anymore and instead grabbed him by the back of the head and kissed him. After a moment, Spike responded and pulled her into him. When they broke the kiss, Spike was smiling at her.

“So there’s kissing, now? No more ‘your way.‘”

“Still ‘my way.’ Tonight there’s kissing.” She pulled him in for a deeper tongue-down-throat kiss, then pulled away. “Questions?”

~~~~

Spike propped himself up on his elbow and turned toward her as she laid beside him and caught her breath. Stay with me stay with me stay with me, he tried to communicate to her telepathically. She looked out the small window on the other side of the crypt.

“Almost dawn,” she sighed.

“Red gonna be worried about you?”

“No. She’s been spending a lot of time in the library. Actually, I think that she’s met somebody. She’s been all evasive-girl, lately.”

Buffy sat up, and Spike started searching for the right words. Anything that could make her stay. She jumped off the sarcophagus and started looking for her clothes. He decided to not try and be suave.

“You could stay. It’s Sunday - no classes.”

“I don’t think so.”

“You can’t tell me that meant nothing, Buffy. I mean, you even stopped biting me that last time.”

She finished getting dressed and walked over to him. “I’m not a robot, Spike. I’m not unfeeling.” She let out a big sigh and took his hand. “I really enjoy this. I love the way you make me feel. I love what your hands can do to me. But why are you trying so hard with this? This is what it is. I’m not looking for a boyfriend.”

Spike sat up and cupped her chin in his hand. “I don’t want to be your boyfriend, Buffy. I just want to be in your life.”

“I’m sorry, Spike. I just don’t see that happening.”

He let go of her and found the blanket on the floor. “I’ll see what I can do about getting a bed in here,” he didn’t look for her reaction, just covered himself, and laid back down. “For next time.”

Buffy watched him for a moment. “Thanks.” She started out, then stopped and turned around, “Spike.”

“Yeah.”

“Patrol with me.”

Spike sat up. “What?”

“Work with me. Come out on patrols. You’re an amazing fighter. I could use you on my side.”

“How are your Scoobies gonna feel about that?”

“Let me worry about the Scooby gang.”

Spike felt William screaming to get to the surface. He smiled. “Is this what I get?”

“This is what you get.”

“Okay. See you tonight.”

~~~~

“Who’s going to what?!” Xander did his predicable freak out. “Spike? Patrol? Are you out of your mind?!”

“Listen, Xander, Spike’s a good fighter. He’s willing to do this and I’m going to accept his help.”

“But, why? What’s in it for him? I mean, he’s not doing it out of the pure evilness of his heart, I’m guessing.”

“He’s doing it cause he’s bored. When he gets tired of working with me, I’m sure he’ll move on.”

“But-”

“Now, Xander, Buffy has a point here,” Giles started cleaning his glasses. “He is a good fighter, and as long as he’s on our side, he can be very helpful. But, Buffy, I don’t trust him. Why do you?”

“It’s nothing I can explain, Giles. I’ve had some opportunities to talk to him. You have to trust me that …I trust him.”

“As you wish, Buffy.”

“No, no, no - this is not good. I see no good in this.”

“Xander, we’re moving on.”

~~~~

The next few weeks, Buffy and Spike developed a routine. They met at his crypt or outside her dorm and usually canvassed three or four graveyards. On nights when she didn’t have any excessive studying to do or have an early class the next day, she stayed at his place for a few hours. He managed to find a bed for her (actually he found the old four-poster one he and Harmony shared sitting unused in the old cave), and set it up in a cavern he discovered under the crypt. And every once in a while, Buffy would fall asleep afterward and wouldn’t leave until morning. These were his best nights. Also, the sex, he had to admit, was getting really fun. She brought all sorts of ideas into his bed and they did some things that even Drusilla had never attempted. But there was always one central theme to everything they tried - the Slayer was in control. Any time he made any kind of first move or put her in any kind of submissive position, she would get angry and hit him or just walk out before they started.

Only Spike’s demon could survive sex with the Slayer. On the nights that she would stay over, though, he allowed William to come out and watch her sleep. William would brush her hair off her face and stroke her cheek. He would remember the casual conversations they had while patrolling. Buffy would prattle on about school and her friends, and usually Spike would just let her ramble, knowing that she really wasn’t telling him anything worthwhile. She was just filling the time. But William would perk up if she started talking about what she was reading for her literature class, or the challenges she was having writing a particular paper. And every so often, he would say something to make her laugh. Buffy had a joyful laugh. When she wasn’t holding back, her laugh would fill the night, and William would be overcome with pride and satisfaction that he could make her feel that way.

But then, later that night, while they were entwined in each others’ arms, he would feel her teeth sink into his skin and he’d know that the Buffy he was falling in love with was nowhere to be found. He never got to make love to Buffy. He was just having sex with the Slayer. And her never really figured out why she kept biting him. However, it really wasn’t something he wanted to complain about. Whenever he felt the pop of his skin being broken and smelled his own blood, he got such a sexual rush, that he would come instantly. It also gave him a faint sense of blood pumping. His blood. The Slayer would bite and then suck and lick the blood that flowed. When she did, he could almost feel his veins pulsating toward the wound to give her more.

~~~~

His heart was beginning to ache. They had been doing this for a couple months now, and nothing had changed. Except his feelings. Every night when he saw her his heart would jump with a mix of joy (another evening with my Slayer!) and fear (after which she will walk away from me without looking back). He was in love with her. Bloody hell. There was no denying it any more. She may not have let him into her heart all the way, but he was able to see what was in it anyway. She was an incredibly strong woman. She was happy most of the time and confident and intelligent and honorable and proud and loyal. And as far as he could tell, the only lie she ever told was to her friends about their relationship. She never lied to him. Even about how she felt about him. It’s only about sex. She has a control over him that excites her. And he knows this.

~~~~

It was any other night. They fought a demon that night. I big ugly Gnorock demon that took some serious pummeling to take down. When they finally got it weak enough, Spike was able to jump on it’s back and twist its head to break its neck. By the time they got back to the Spike‘s place, they were both too exhausted to move. They tumbled down to the lower crypt and fell on the bed.

“Wanna have sex?” Buffy mumbled into the pillow.

“Sure,” Spike lay on his back and flung his arm onto her, landing on her lower back.

“This is all kinds of fun.”

They fell asleep.

Spike awoke to the Slayer licking his neck. She was sucking on the numerous bite wounds that had healed over themselves, leaving a couple of fine white scars over his jugular.

“Hey, vampire. You all rested?” she cooed in his ear when he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tighter. He got hard immediately. His demon would always roar to the surface when she called him ‘vampire.’ He rolled over on her and kissed her hard, hoping she would consider the first move already to have been made. She responded in kind, and he moved quickly to remove their clothes.

When they were both naked and he had tossed her panties on the ground, he was able to run his cool hands over her glistening body. He looked her in the eyes and asked, “What can I do for you, baby?”

Buffy gently took his hand in hers and brought it to her mouth. She brushed his fingers along her lips while wetting them at the same time. When she brought her tongue back into her mouth, she pulled one of his fingers along with it. She sucked on his finger and danced around it with her tongue. Spike let out a moan when her other hand suddenly appeared on his hard cock and started stroking.

“You like that?” she purred.

“I love when you touch me,” Spike answered.

Buffy ran her thumb over the pre-cum at his tip and used it to moisten his shaft as she continued to move her hand along his long hard dick. At the same time, she glided his wet finger from her mouth down her neck, between her breasts, and across her stomach until she was able to press it to her clit which had grown hard and large. She removed her hand and he took over from there. Having done this numerous times, he knew what she liked.

Spike flicked his finger across her nub making Buffy gasp in a couple quick breaths of air. Then he moved his hand down slightly and teased her by rubbing his fingers along her outer then inner lips.

Buffy muffled a string of words that made him want to come immediately. “Yeah, touch me, oh god, love, fuck, in me, now, baby, fuck, Spike, oh, yeah, fuck, god, god.”

Spike grabbed her hand on his cock to slow her down so he could keep the moment going. He plunged three fingers into her hard and fast and she cried out.

“Spike!”

He pumped his fingers into her and rubbed her clit with his thumb while watching her face. He had no idea if she knew that he did this, but looking at her closely when she came was the most beautiful thing he would ever see. She would close her eyes, but never squeeze them shut tight. As tight as her muscles would get throughout her whole body, they always seemed to stay relaxed and calm in her face. She would open her mouth slightly and let out little short breaths and then the grunts would start to come from the back of her throat. He wanted her to look like that for the rest of her life and he wanted to be the only one to make it happen.

Love me love me love me love me, he screamed at her with his mind while she moaned and stroked him.

Then she said something to him that he was sure made his heart pitter-patter for a moment.

“Fuck me now, baby.” The last time she used those words was when she was mystically in love with him during the witch’s spell.

Spike crawled on top of her and coaxed one of her legs onto his shoulder. He grabbed his cock and held it against her wetness, rubbing it up and down her opening.

“You want this?” he teased.

“Now, now, fuck, Spike, fuck me.”

“No,” Spike told her harshly, and her eyes flew open and glared at him.

“Now!” She hissed at him.

He stared back at her and started rubbing her clit with his thumb again with the rest of his hand still on his dick which was twitching by now, needing its own release.

Buffy grabbed his neck with both hands and bore her fingernails into the back of it. Spike felt a few of drops of blood start to seep out and he thrust into her hard and deep.

Spike kept his eyes focused on her face as he pumped into her, not wanting to miss a moment of her pleasure. When he felt his release was imminent and he knew that she was approaching her third orgasm, he leaned forward and positioned his neck at her mouth. She brought her lips up to his cold veins and sucked on her mark. They both came with guttural noises, and Spike collapsed on her with a shutter. It took him a minute to notice that she hadn’t bitten him.

He was overcome with fear and disappointment. Her bites were the one thing he could really count on. There were times that she hadn’t sunk her teeth into him, but he discovered that was usually after they had mated three or four times in one night. He figured that she was giving his swollen skin a rest at those times.

But this was their first time tonight. He came to count on that bite. He needed it. Though he wasn’t quite sure why. His worry suddenly consumed him. Was it because she was getting tired of him? Did she honestly not feel like it that time? Or, and this was the one he was most hopeful for, was her need to control him finally fading.

He slowly rolled over onto the bed and sat up leaning against the headboard. Buffy scooted up next to him and laid her head against his chest. He ran his fingers through her silky hair and kissed the top of her head. He wondered if it ever bothered her that she couldn’t feel a heartbeat through his chest. He consciously took a deep breath hoping that the move would make her forget she was laying against a dead person.

As they continued to lay there, he felt a wave of contentment flow through him. He could sense William start to burn in his core and was somehow starting to feel warm. He hoped that Buffy could feel the heat coming from inside him. William couldn’t hold his emotions in any longer.

“I love you, Buffy,” he ventured. “I will always love you.”

He kissed the top of her head again. Buffy took in a deep breath. She didn’t move for several minutes, and he began to relax more and even start to fall asleep. Just when he was beginning to dream, he felt Buffy get up. He opened his eyes and watched her gather her clothes and get dressed. Without saying a word or looking back at him, she walked out.

William’s heart sank, and Spike began screaming at himself for being so stupid.


To be continued...

Chapter 4

Buffy knocked on his door. Not hearing any noise from inside, she started banging. After a minute, the door flung open, and he stood there in his boxer shorts looking quite disheveled and pissed off.

“What?” Xander growled at her.

She tried to make her voice sound as soft as possible. “I’m really sorry, Xander. I need to talk to you.”

“It’s 3 o’clock in the morning, Buffy. This can’t wait until a more day time part of the day?”

“Not really.”

He shook his sleep off the best he could, “Is somebody in trouble? Is somebody hurt?”

“No. Everybody’s fine. I just need to talk.”

Xander put on his concerned face and stepped away from the door to let her in. Buffy walked to the edge of the bed and sat down. Xander picked a t-shirt up off the floor, sniffed it, and put it on. He sat next her.

Buffy took a deep breath and looked at him straight in the eyes. She grasped both of his hands in both of hers.

“Xander. I’m going to tell you something that you are not going to like. You are going to get pissy and all judgmental-like, and that’s ok. But I need you to let me finish before you lay into me about it. Ok?”

“Okay…” he answered cautiously.

“I’ve been having sex with Spike.” Xander tensed up quickly and tried to pull his hands away from Buffy. She tightened her grip. “Stay with me. I’m still talking.

“It’s been going on for a couple of months. Ever since Willow’s spell. I knew that you wanted to know what happened that night. I’ll tell you now. Will broke the spell a little too late. We had started to make love and were in the middle of it when it was broken. I could have stopped it at that point, but something in me didn’t want it to stop.

“Now, there is something very important that you have to understand. Not once, during this whole affair, did Spike ever take advantage of me. I never did anything that I didn’t want to do. In fact, I have been in complete control of the entire situation. The control I have is what makes me keep going back to him.” Buffy closed her eyes for a moment. When she opened them again, Xander was just staring at her. She tried to read the expression on his face, but couldn’t. So she continued.

“This control I have over him is an amazing thing. It lets me be a different person than I am with you guys. I love being your friend. And if I ever lost any of you, I wouldn’t be able to live. And the Slayer part of me, even though it can be overwhelming at times, is the reason I’m the person I am. I will always be the Slayer. But Spike has brought out this third person in me. It’s not Slayer power. It’s my power. It’s this heat in me that boils over when I see him. And he’s such a puppy around me. I can get him to do anything I want. It’s good, Xander. And I don’t want it to stop.

“I’m telling you this for two reasons. One - I’m tired of lying. It makes me sad whenever I see all of you that you don’t know who I am. Spike has changed me. And I hope in a good way. And I wanted to tell you first, because I knew you would take it the hardest, and it’s important that you understand what’s happening.

“Are you with me, Xander? Are you freaking out?” Xander blinked a couple of times.

“Yes, I’m with you. Yes, I’m freaking out. What’s the second reason you’re telling me this?”

“Because I need your advice. And this advice falls under the heading of guysville. I know you think of Spike as just a vampire, and for the most part, you’re right. But Spike’s got a man in him. A different kind of man that Angel had. Angel needed a soul to find his man. But Spike…Spike is constantly dueling it out with his human side. I can see it. I can feel it. Now that he can’t hurt humans anymore, he’s struggling with his identity. Trying to find his place in the world. He can’t be the demon that he is, and he doesn’t know how to be a man. And he wants me to help him.

“And here in lies the problem. He’s in love with me. I knew it was coming. I knew his feelings were changing. I think that we started out on the same page. It was about sex. That’s all….You know….that’s not true. I did know. I’m just realizing this now. I completely blocked it out. I think he’s been in love with me for years. I’m sure it was a sick kind of love. I mean, he wanted to kill me at the same time, but he had certain feelings that confused him.

“I think I have helped create an odd creature. I don’t know if the vampire is in love with me, or the man, or both. And I don’t know what to do. Help me, Xander, please. What do I do now?”

Xander slowly removed his hands from Buffy’s grip and she let him go. He stood up and walked a few paces away. When he turned to look at her again, she could see the anger in his eyes. She could tell that there was so much he wanted to say. He wanted to scream. He didn’t let the anger fade from his eyes, but he took in a deep breath that told her that he wasn’t going to rip into her right then.

“I have two questions for you,” he started. “I hope that when you truly ask yourself these questions, you’ll find the answer you’re looking for.” He narrowed his eyes a little. “Do you want the situation to change between you two? And do you love him?”

~~~~

Spike sat in his chair and watched the door. He had tried to make the tough decisions since Buffy had left the previous night. He knew that he couldn’t live without his Slayer. He needed her in his life. But how long was he going to be able to go on torturing himself. It’s not like he was expecting her to love him back. Not really. He knew the right thing to do.

End it, he kept telling himself. Don’t let her in. Stop letting her use me. Don’t let her in. Leave town. Don’t let her in.

He even went so far as to lock his door. Although it took every ounce of willpower to stay put in his chair and not unlock it. The sun had just gone down. She would be there soon. Unless she didn’t come. Unless she was so repulsed by his declaration last night, that she would never come back.

But, wait. Isn’t that what I want? No. Not that way. If it ends, then I have to end it.. Spike started to panic. She has to come. I need her so much.

He was just about to get out of his chair to unlock the door, when he sensed her on the other side of it. The door moved slightly as she pushed against it. Spike froze. He suddenly forgot which decision he was on, he had flip-flopped so much. There was a loud bang from the door. The banging happened two more times before it was flung open. Buffy walked in.

“Not the first time I had to kick that door in. What are you playing at, vampire?”

When he saw her, William and his demon began to battle it out. He stood up and backed himself up to one of the pillars behind him, needing to somehow delay this confrontation as long as possible. He knew he had to say something to her, and the half of him to speak up first was William.

“I can’t go on not loving you, Buffy.”

She walked up to him quickly. “Oh, yeah?” She reached up, grabbed his hair, and pushed his head violently against the pillar. He blacked out.

~~~~

When he awoke, he was inside of her. That was the first thing he noticed before he even opened his eyes. He knew her warmth instantly, and he made a move to wrap his arms around her. When he realized that he couldn’t move his arms, he became fully conscious and aware of his surroundings.

He was downstairs on his bed. His wrists and ankles were shackled to the four corners. Both he and Buffy were naked and she was on top of him, slowly gliding himself in and out of her. He wanted desperately to grab her hips and help guide her. They had played this game before. He had a pair of handcuffs that they had both used on each other. But this was the first time that she had bound his legs. And never before with shackles and chains. Where did these come from?

Buffy was watching him closely. She seemed to be able to read every expression he made while he was figuring out the situation. Without him asking out loud, she answered his question.

“I got the shackles from Angel’s old mansion. Recognize them?”

Spike was discovering that he was the most helpless that he had ever been. “I don’t like this game,” he told her.

“Is that right?” she answered cooly. “Well, what game do you want to play.” She made a few twists and turns with her body, which caused Spike to gasp and roll his head back. Buffy smiled.

He regained his composure as quickly as he could. “No more games. No more your way. I love you and you can’t shut me out any more.”

“Big talk from a helpless vampire.”

Spike knew that she was trying to bait his demon. William shoved it down. He focused on her green eyes and made sure she was looking directly back into his blue ones.

“Let me make love to you, Buffy. I can show you. It doesn’t always have to be like this. We can change it. It can be even better. Please, baby. Unchain me and let me love you.”

Buffy stopped moving. She leaned toward him a little bit and tightened her Slayer-muscles around his cock. He let out a quick whimper.

“You’re right, Spike. We can make it better. We can change it. I’ll untie you and you can hold me and love me. It will be beautiful. It’ll be magic.” She leaned down on him all the way and flinched around his cock again, gripping even harder. She licked his earlobe then sucked on her mark a couple times. She brought her face to his until their noses were almost touching.

“And if we did that, it would happen one time. Just one time. Because after that, it would be over. We would have one night where I would give myself over to you completely. You could love me in every way you have ever wanted to. But I won’t come back. Ever. Just one night, Spike.”

She sat back up and every muscle in her lower body clenched. He thighs were hard and tight and pressing his hips down into the mattress. She began massaging his dick again with her inner muscles. He wanted more than anything to thrust up into her, but he couldn’t move at all. She had started moving herself around his cock in quick bursts. If she continued moving that way, he was going to come and she knew it. Suddenly, she stopped all movement and stayed clenched around him.

“Which is it, vampire? Do I unchain you? Yes or no?”

The demon was gone. William was staring at her. He loved her so much. His future ran through his mind. Would he ever be happy? This extraordinary woman, so close, but never his. Never in the way he wanted. Would it make him too miserable to go on? How long would he be able to make one night last? And would it be enough?

Buffy twitched. “Unchain? Yes or no?” she asked again.

William turned away from her. He felt a tear escape his eye and roll down his cheek. “No,” he answered quietly.

Buffy loosened her grip on him so that he was no longer pinned to the mattress. She started moving her entire body up and down on him and pump him faster until he involuntarily thrust his hips up to match hers.

I lost her, William was telling his demon. You never had her, his demon responded.

Spike knew his climax was coming and felt Buffy begin to join him. He let William feel the entire orgasm and the man let out a primal scream when he came. At the same time, the Slayer fell on top of him and tore into his neck. (Both Buffy and Spike were unsure of it when they thought back on it later, but they felt an odd thump in his chest when she sucked his blood. She was able to drink from him for a full minute before it stopped flowing.)

When she had licked his neck clean of all liquid, she climbed down off the bed. She got dressed, removed a key from her pocket, and walked to where Spike’s feet were chained. She unlocked the shackle around one of his ankles.

“I’m sorry, Spike,” she told him while unlocking his other ankle. “But I really don’t want things to change. This whole situation…” she moved to the head of the bed and unlocked one wrist, “…it works for me. If you have issues with the way things are going…” she walked around the bed, “…you can end it at any time.” She unlocked his other wrist. “Thank you for loving me, Spike. But I don’t love you.” She walked out.

Spike laid on the bed for several minutes before shaking his limbs free of the shackles. He turned to his side, curled his legs up to his chest and wrapped his arms around his knees. He began to sob. He knew that, tomorrow, he would let her in.

The End.

Hope you liked it! I beg you to review. I live for it - like Spike, I wear my heart on my sleeve.