Timespace: After season 7 of buffy has ended, but somewhere before the fall.

Prologue

Spike has somehow been restored to his normal self after arriving in the amulet he wore when sunnydale was destroyed. He is now working alongside angel at Wolfram & Hart battling evil and arguing over petty things like who saved the world the most times. willow has found the long lost book of Pangea in a box of Tara's old possesions. The book bares the secrets and the power to restore and resurect anything and everything. She has since then restored Sunnydale back to its previous self. The potentials have all went their seprate ways, and when Kennedy left she was getting pretty snuggly with Amy. (yes Amy the rat Amy.) Tara, Anya and Willow all helped produce the spell that reversed Buffy's woman-power-every-girls-a-slayer effect and erased it out of civilians minds. Riley, his wife, Gwendolyn Post, and Hobson have moved to England to re-build the watchers council. Willow has used the book of Pangea to erm...re-grow his eyeball. and Xander and Anya are re-engaged. Angel is still as brooding as ever, Gunn and Cordelia are seeing each other, and the scoobies are back in Sunnydale. Spike is still ''dead'' as far as anyone is concerned Dawn is the only one who knows that he is alive and Angel has placed a tounge-tying jinx on her because he wishes for Buffy to fall back in love with Angel. Dawn and Spike keep in touch frequently over the phone and ocasionally visit. Dawn considers him like a father, he considers her as a daughter.


Chapter 1 ::

''SPIKE!''... Angel calls from his oversized office. Spike enters the room munching on wheetapix. ''Calm down you bloody poof 'm right here.''

Angel stands up and closes the green mini bars door. ''Where is my $1900.00 bottle of imported brazillian rum!''

Spike holds up an empty bottle with forigne writing on it. ''Umm...'' Angel growls then slams Spike up against the wall, the glass bottle falls to the ground and shatters.

''Hey, watch it peaches'' Angel whips around and grabs his pet bamboo plant out of the pot, snaps it in half and raises it above Spikes chest.

''Sod off" Spike shoves Angel into his desk, papers fall to the floor.

Outside of Angels office demons and very frightened people stare at the office door, as numerous thuds and crashes can be heard. Harmony stands up and reasures the people. "Dont worry its probably just another tustle ove-" muffled voices come from the door.

"Oohh look at me 'm all dark and brooding-like watch as i mesmerise you with my huge forehead'' ''Shut up captain peroxide.''

the elevator dingd and a pissed off looking Gunn enters the waiting room dragging a pale Andrew behind him. Harmony opens her mouth to ask a question, but Gunn cuts her off. "yes me and coredelia are in a fight, no i will not check your computer for online demons that dont exist." " im guessing Angel and Spike are in there?" An elderly lady nods.

Back in the office Spike throws a gargoyle paperweight at Angel who is standing in front of the office door, Angel ducks just as Gunn imerges dragging Andrew behind him, Gunn ducks as he spots the gargoyle, while Andrew gets hit square in the forehead with it and falls to the ground.

A small demon in the waiting room sticks his head around the door and comments "noob". Gunn gives the demon a shut-the-fuck-up-im-not-in-the-mood-ill-kick-your-ass look. He then turns around to face Spike and Angel who have each other in this weird head lock thing, and are pulling each others hair.

''Are you two quite done?" Andrew sits up and stares at Angel, Angel looks up "he started it" he points a finger towards Spike.

"He drank all my rum" Angel pouts. Spike gives Angel a disbeliving look. "Wow Buffy was right when she said you we're now acting like a 12 year old." Angel and Spike release each other and stand up, Angel straightens out his custom blazer, while Spike slumps down in a chair and lights a cigarette.

Angel clears his throut and loks at Gunn "So umm.. why did you interupt my uh.. chat with Spike" "Well i was out kicking some demon ass...well okay i was arguing with Cordy about if we should get the Georgetown collection, or the Beatrice Collection for the living room,

but i decided to come see if you needed any help with anything and i ran into him, he said he needed to see Spike said it was quite important, i didnt believe him since i heard the story where he tried to open the hellmouth"

Andrew stood up "Hey i was like under the Firsts trance that so didnt count" "WILL YOU STOP INTERUPTING ME!" Gunn yelled "anyways i didnt belive him until he said that Buffy was in trouble... while she is troubled"

Andrew turned around and closed the door. then pulled a dvd out of his jacket "here this is for you" Spike reached out and grabbed the disc "aww why does Spike get all the gifts?" Angel yelled.

Gunn lookes over at Angel with a raised eyebrow, Spike walked over to the TV set and popped in the dvd "i dont know why i taped this... i just thought you'd want to see it.

The screen shows a very familiar graveyard, a few 30 some girls and a few demons are gathered around a black, shiny gravestone, beside it an all to familiar face looks into the crowd with her blonde hair shining in the sun.

In the front of the crowd a brunette teenager is crying into a red heads shoulder and a very wrinkly demon is blowing his nose in a huge hanky, elephant noises can be heard from him,

Wesley silently entered Angels office and stands beside Gunn. The blonde on the screen moves beside the younger brunette, her face was tearstained.

The screen shows a very familiar graveyard, a few 30 some girls and a few demons are gathered around a black, shiny gravestone, beside it an all to familiar face looks into the crowd with her blonde hair shining in the sun. In the front of the crowd a brunette teenager is crying into a red heads shoulder and a very wrinkly demon is blowing his nose in a huge hanky, elephant noises can be heard from him,

Wesley silently entered Angels office and stands beside Gunn. The blonde on the screen moves beside the younger brunette, her face was tearstained.

And she smiled meekly at the young girl beside her, then she began to speak "Umm we are gathered here today to spare a moment for a friend and an

ally...alot of you, in fact most of you didnt really like Spike, not many of you knew him but he was the most amazing...person" as she said the last word her

breath caught in her throat, and a tear slid down her face. "Spike taught me more about life than anyone else i ever knew, which is ironic because he wasn't

technicly alive, but he had more spirit than any human i've ever known, Spike was always there for me, his support was un-wavering, even when others

abandoned me Spike was at my side." at the last sentance people looked around, guilty. "Spike seldom asked for more than we could give, for his entire

life...and unlife Spike looked for love, and companionship despite being dead at times, well evil, he devoted himself to others...it occoured to me, right before

he...died." a huge sob escaped her lips, and the older man with glasses on stepped up beside her and patted her shoulder, comforting her, Buffy looked

at the gravestone and with a deep sigh she continued her speech. "Right before he died i realized that Spike had never been loved, he had loved enough

for a billion people and he had devoted centuries to others, good or evil, but he never got anything close to love in return...but still he sacraficed his life for us...for me that night, and he died alone,

he sacrificed his own life because despite the fact that most of you hated him he cared about your fates, i dont care if none of you liked me but please, think about this, think about the life he led and the sacrifices he made, because Spike was a true hero, Spike was a champion,i hope you know that he is remembered."

a girlsih sobbing noise could be heard from behind the camera. presumably the person filming was touched.

The film cut to the gravestone, blades of grass and leaf obscurred part of the screen, and it was assumed the camera was hidden there.

Someones feet became visible in the frame and as she knelt down at the grave Buffy's face came into view. "Hi Spike.. I...I don't know where you are... or if you are,

but i wanted to read you your gravestone." Buffy sobbed quietly "it says here lies William, he was a true champion. i know its lame, but i just, there was so much i wanted to say to you,

so much was un-said and i don't know if you believed me in the end, if you just wanted me to leave but Spike, I do love you... i need you to know that you were loved, you are loved, youre life...or un-life ment so much to me.. i had this guy i was seeing for awhile,

i don't know why, i just wanted everyone to think i had moved on, the immortal was perfect but i felt nothing, i just felt more hollowness inside of me,

i asked him to leave, and he did." she looked like she wanted to cry but she was trying to put on a brave face, buffy let out a forced giggle.

" Spike, you have ruined me for every other man in the world." "Anyway i don't know how to do this...life or whatever they're calling it these days without you, and i know i said it before... but Spike i do love you, know that you were loved...are loved."

on screen Buffy stood up and walked away, leaving just the gravestone, the camara kept filming...but no one stopped it.

silent tears streamed down Spikes face, Andrew stood up and left the room. Gunn and Weasly looked at each other, they appeared to be in Shock,

Weasly contemplated something in his head before speaking out loud. "Spike what is love?" Spike eyed him as if he was crazy, but then he seemed lost in thought,

"It can't just be described like that, but Weasly..." the last part was added quietly...as if an afterthought. "She isn't love keeping a shrine of someone. not letting go, it isn't love."

Weasly looked as though that was the answer he was looking for and he left the room, Gunn followed him.

Angel sat at his desk silently staring at Spike , his eyes showed little emotion but suddenly he seemed to come to some sort of a conclusion. he reached into his desk and pulled a piece of paper out .

"If you hurt her i'll kill you." he said the words quietly before handing the paper to Spike and leaving the room. Spike looked at what was in his hands a one way Train ticket to good 'ole Sunnydale.


*********Back in sunnydale********

Dawn and Buffy we're sitting across from each other. Dawn had just finished telling Buffy that she could bring Spike back, ressurect him make him alive again, er well as alive as the un-dead could get

Dawn tried to read the emotions on Buffy's face but all she could see was pure shock, anger, and was that... love? "Well aren't you gonna say something?" "Buffy?" Dawn asked

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT ME TO SAY! THIS IS INSANE" she snapped angrily rising to her feet. Buffy paced back and forth running her hand through her hair, Dawn looked at Buffy, confused.

"Buffy i thought you'd be thrilled" dawn stated. Buffy turned sharply to face her sister "thrilled? are. you. mad.? people aren't supposed to come back from the dead! its wrong unnatural."

Dawn looked at Buffy and simply replied "you did." Buffy Fisted her hands and gritted her teeth she hated bringing up the fact that she died and her friends pulled her back to hell- er- earth she hated the fact she was pulled out of heaven and she hated the fact that her friends knew.

With a swift turn Buffy ran up the stairs and slammed her bedroom door, and slid down the back of it, to rest on her butt. tears sprag to her eyes and rolled down her cheeks.

A million and one questions and thoughts swam through her head, she was thrilled he could possibly come back it was a dream come true, a dream that replayed at night over and over again, ever since the day the hellmouth calapsed and he died.

But then there was the fact that Spike might not be normal, she chuckled at that thought Spike was never normal, he was better than normal yet ever so slightly frayed. but what if Spike wasnt Spike.

Ressurections we're taboo, things went wrong all the time, they always went wrong, she abrubtly stood up and walked over to her dresser, on it rested a dried up yet vibrantly red-colored rose and a picture of him.

she ever so gently caressed his face in the picture. and more tears slid down her cheeks "God i miss you" she wispered. "i miss you too pet"

Buffy gasped and turned around so fast she knocked the picture of him off her dresser. As if a whisper she thought she had heard it . heard his voice. well she always heard his voice but never as real as this was.

Tt was official she was going crazy, she had to be. she walked to her bed but stopped when she heard a crunch and looked down to see his picture smashed.

that was when she broke down, she wailed and wailed tears flooded from her eyes she just calapsed on the floor and cryed, loud sobs escaped her lips.

A few moments later the door burst open and Xander and Willow came through followed by Dawn "oh god" Willow shouted. blood. there was blood everywhere. "Xander get dawn the hell out of here" "no im not going anywhere whats going on." whats wrong" "is Buffy ok" "Xander get her out NOW!" Xander grabbed Dawn by the arm and pulled her out of the room, and slammed the door behind her.

"God Wills what as that abo- OH MY GOD." Xander said. there was blood everywhere glass shattered across the floor and he looked down and saw Buffy on the floor crying and clutching a photo

there was hunks of glass sticking out of each wrist. and the realization hit Xander. She had tried to kill herself.

"Xander call 911." Willow yelled "no they'll put her in the asylum." "do you want her to die?" "no bu-" "for god sakes Xander call giles then! hurry shes bleeding out!"

Buffy heard muffled shouts she presumed they we're her friends saving her again, but this time she didnt want them to save her.

this was it she thought Spike was right he was always right this was time she had her death wish. and know she'd finally join her lover.

Buffy thought back through her life nothing major had happened she had never lived an amazing life nothing great had happened she defeated many foes. had many good times and a heck of alot of bad ones.

she lived in solitude never telling her friend many things only telling one person. HIM. she thought back she had defeated every evil that arised except HIM

she lost Angel, Parker, Riley, and HIM.

then she gained Dawn, then she almost lost her to Glory and none we're strong enough to stand up to her except HIM he protected her, and Dawn then came the greatest evil she had ever faced. the first and the first was defeated because of HIM

her life had revolved around HIM and death.. always death. and know she would give in to death and join HIM.

Spike had visited Buffy's house and saw her crying and talking to a picture of him then he heard her state that she missed him... without thinking he had replied.

then he saw her spin around and face the spot where he was hidden in the process she knocked the picture off her dresser. when she strained and saw nothing she basicly collapsed on the floor... and he had watched as she went into hysterics.

and with that he left he couldn't face Buffy because this wasn't his Buffy it was an insane broken one. he had begain walking down the drive when he heard red screaming something about an ambulance to the Whelp.

He ran back to Buffy's house and as soon as he entered the front door he smelt blood. "OH GOD." he ran up the stairs and attempted to open the door, it was locked... he frowned then broke down the door.

Xander and Willow looked at him "Spike?" they said in usion. then Buffy started convulsing. and they turned there attention back to attemptig to stop the bleeding and in the process shoving the glass deeper into her arms.

he growled and pushed red aside. "move 'ure doing it wrong ure 'urting her" he looked at Buffys face She was clearly out of it and yet still crying her eyes out.

"its okay love i'll fix you." he reached down and as carefully as possible pulled the glass out of her delicate arms. then wrapped the rags against it to stop the bleeding.

then the blood seeped throught the rags he realized she had cut the veins. he groaned and looked at Willow and Xander.

"wha- whats wrong SPIKE WHY DID YOU STOP" Willow yelled. He looked up at Willow and tears ran down his face. "the veins are severed i can't fix it." he let a sob escape from him.

Then the realization slipped in. he was gonna lose her again. then he put his lips to her wrist and started to suck the blood.

Xander picked up a porclean ornament of Buffy' s and smashed it over Spikes head. "you bastard you find out shes a gonner and 5 seconds later you drink from her?"

'tis not like that" Spike said quickly. "like hell its not" Xander yelled. "you bleeding whelp if i drink from her then cut off the cirulation to her arms i can 'effing stop the bleeding!"

"oh" Xander said sheepishly. Spike continued on drinking from her then he grabbed the rags and tired them tight around her wrists and took 4 inch thick elastics and put at the top of her arms.

by the looks of it the blood had subsided. for know.

"lets get her onto the bed." Willow suggested. Xander moved as if to pick her up and Spike turned to him and vamped out and growled. "you. will. not. touch. her. whelp.

"like hell i wont she our friend not yours." he continued to attempt to pick Buffy up. Spike punched him in the face and picked Buffy up himself.

he carefully laid her on the bed. she looked quite flushed and pale. she had lost alot of blood and was frail as it was . he wondered if she had been eating.

he carefully carresed her face and pushed her hair out of her face. he then stood up and walked out of the room out of the house and out the driveway.

Xander followed "Where are you going?" "leavin" "well obviously but why" "she cant know im here, she can never know im here, as far as she's concerned you two saved her alright?" Spike said.

"but-" Xander begain. "but nothing she can never know." "fine" Xander said. and with that Spike turned and left, Xander watched him walk for awhile then ran back inside. As he reached Buffy's room he heard the front door open.

Xander went right into her room. and said to Willow. "he's gone. she can never know he was here, never know anything Will he dosent want her to know."

then Giles ran into the room with what looked like a house-call-doctors bag from the 1800's. "oh-god im too late" he looked at Buffy's pale form on the bed. "im too late shes gone. DAMN IT! i knew i'd be the death of her! God she was right just another slayer in the line of duty. What did this to her i'll slash it open"

Xander and Willow looked at Giles fearfully. "Giles calm down she's not dead." "oh" Giles said. "thank-god i dunno what i would do with myself if we had to face her death again.

"what happened" Giles asked. "well we don't exactly know! We came over at Dawns request, and heard a crash and crying then came up here to find her in shock and crying with glass stuck in her wrists" Willow said.

"i know what happened" Xander said. "Willow and Giles looked at him questionly. "she attempted to kill herself."

Giles took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes, never in a million years would he think his slayer, his Buffy would go suicide she has so much to live for. her friends, her family, Dawn, then it struck him. a lover, she lacks a lover...no she lacks Spike.

"Xander?" Giles asked. "yeah" "will you go downstairs and make me a cup of tea.?" "um- yeah i guess... sure." Xander replied.

"Willow, now i trust your judgement but do you think theres a possibility we could use the book of Pangea to resurect Spike?" Giles asked. "yeah it would 100% work with no side effects because he's the un-dead. but um we kinda don't have to." Willow stated.

"What do you mean we don't have to, clearly Buffy did this because she is lacking him." Giles said. "Well we already kinda knew that hence the picture of him wrapped in her arms.." Willow pointed to Buffy.

"Oh... well we need to bring him back clearly she will try this again and again till it takes full affect and we lose her." Giles stated. "um again you missed the point where i said we don't have to cause he's kinda um- already back.." Willow says.

"What?" Giles questions. "um yeah we don't know how, or why, but he kinda just showed up and stopped the bleeding... i guess he was lurking and smelled the blood.. and knew it was Buffy's blood. Without him we would have lost Buffy." Willow said

"Well.. thats incredible.. you mean to say he returned from the Hellmouth with no magical assistance?" Giles asks.

"Well yeah i guess... i mean none of us could have done it but me you.. or-or Tara or me...and Angel wouldn't do it he hates Spike... come to think of it i don't think we even told Angel about Spike...then again he's his grand-sire wouln't he like get the tingelies or something.. OH! but not those tingelies because he's not gay..bu-"

"Willow! your rambling, and no i don't thing Angel did it or knows about it he would have told Buffy for sure." Giles says.

"Back here is your steaming hot cup of char." Xander smirked and handed the cup to Giles. "Thank-you Xander." Giles says. "no problem i had to get away from this room anyway the blood was getting to me." Xander said.

"mm-hmm the blood is quite strong do you think we should clean it.. or should we move her so we can keep an eye on her." Willow asked.

" i think maybe we should clean the blood, we really shouldn't move her." Xander said. "Actually Xander i think it would be best to move her in case she wakes up and trys that again." Giles says.

"fine you guys can move her but my nose protests." Xander said. Giles looked at him funny. "Spike punched him in the nose after he tried to touch Buffy he was all reaches to pick Buffy up and there was an exchange of words, a fist and some vamping out." Willow informed him.

Giles just stood there mouth agape. "what wh-why are you making that face?" Xander asked. "so you mean to say spike actually hurt Xander?" Giles said. "well yeah i mean Xander is pretty tough but i think the Vampire strength won out in the end." Willow said.

"no. no. no. i mean Spike actually hurt a human without the chip interfering?" Giles said. Willows eyes went wid faster than Xanders did. "so death takes a chip implanted in your skull out?" Xander asks.

"yeah it does, did i hear something about you touching her?" Spike asked. Giles stood up and looked a Spike "so you are back?" Giles asked.

"i seem to be in living flesh and color." Spike replied. "and you saved her?" Giles asked "i did." Spike said. "Thank-you without you we would have lost her again... for good. and i dont think Dawn would have been able to face that...none of us woul have been ready to face that... speaking of Dawn..." Giles said.

"the little bit ran out the front door with a pack when i was on my way in she said she was going to Janices, that she couldn't stand to be left out any longer and that she would return tomorrow." Spike replied.

"And.. you just let her go with what happened on Halloween 2 years ago?" Xander asked. "well...yeah" Spike replied. "Great...im gonna go grab Anya then head over to Janices to see if she's telling the truth." Xander stated.

"Okay... you sure you'll be fine on your own?" Willow asked.

"Yes willow the 22 year old man that has weapons and know about all the worlds beasties can walk 2 blocks up the road and grab his vengance demon girlfriend." Xander stated.

"Just checking." Willow said. When she and giles turned back to Buffy Spike was Kneeling beside the bed staring into her eyes and holding her hand.

"i thought you didnt want her to know you are here" Willow asked. "times change." Spike replied.

"well i think we need to set up watch times we all take turns watching to see if Buffy's ok and if she wakes up or not." Willow suggested.

Spike didnt even turn his head he just simply replied "No. i'll stay with her the WHOLE time." Giles began to protest.

"i said i'll stay she looked after me many aa time when i was out of it cause of 'm sould and when i first got the chip i owe everything to her."

"No Spike we have to take shifts it's safest." Giles replied then Spike vamped out "i said NO ONE IS TOUCHING HER AND IM STAYING WITH 'ER." Spike turned back to Buffy and lost his Demon face.

and with that Willow and Giles strode out of the room and went downstairs to the kitchen. "i think somethings wrong with him." Giles replied. "well he wouldnt hurt her so they should be fine until we figure out what is wrong with him." Willow replied.

Willow walked over to the fridge and pulled out some milk and retrieved a glass from the cupboard, she poured the milk and strode back over to the island and sat down across from Giles.

she stared at the milk while she pondered how to ask the question she knew he was thinking. "do you think Buffy will be alright?" Willow asked.

"Well Willow theres no sure way of knowing that i mean she is the slayer so her flesh wounds should heal but she went through something very tramatic and her mind might never truly heal." Giles replied.

"but she'll still be Buffy...Right?" Willow asked. "theres no true way of knowing." Giles replied.

Willow took a sip of her milk.

Spike held Buffy's hand then slowly crawled up into her bed and held her, careful no to touch her wrists. "god pet how i've missed you, i thought about you every day since i've been back,"

"i returned to L.A then Angel Got some Of them Warlocks at Wolfram and Hart to put spells on me and Dawn, keeping her quiet and making me stay there, but that's all changed now, i'm back and i need you, i love you Buffy, come back to me" Spike wispered into her ear.

Buffy moaned, and a tear slid down her face.

Buffy walked down a white hallway and entered the restfield graveyard she walked a bit until Spike appeared he startted walking.. and she followed him. "wait i-i dont understand how how are you back, i missed you so much i-"

he stopped infront of a gravestone then pointed to it... it was her gravestone it read: Buffy Summers took the easy way out and went suicide, no one loved her, and she will not be missed.

then the scene shifted and she kept faling into a dark hole.. over and over and over then it shifter and she was in a field fighting 1000's of demons by herself, then it shifted once again and she was sitting on her bed, it was soaked with blood and her wrists felt like they we're on fire

again and again the scenes shifted and her wrists burned.

then she went into a white room, everything was white, she entered the living room and there was her mother seated on the couch wearing a white pants suit and has white wings.

"mommy?" Buffy asked. "yes Buffy it's me." "oh god mom i've missed you so much." she ran to her mother and hugged her. "i have so may questions" Buffy said. "well i'll do my best to answer them.

"where have you been, are you okay, that day when you died were you scared, are you mad at me, can i die, have you seen Spike, were you in heaven?"

"i have been in heaven Buffy, yes i'm okay but i miss you and Dawn terribly, no iw as not scared when i died, i felt at peace, and no dear i could never be mad at you..okay well yes i could be mad at you but im not, i have no reason to be mad, no i haven't seen Spike why is he dead?"

Buffy lowered her head and put her hnds in her lap, yeah mom, Spikes dead, tears begain to roll down her face, and at that moment her mother understood.

"you love him?" Joyce asked. "I think so.. i mean he saved me time and time again, he sacrificed himself for me, he got his soul for me, he's smart, sexy, totally a dumb blonde at times, he understands me, he cares for me... or he did."

"Buffy you have to return to your friends know, they need you, you need them." Joyce said

"But mom i need you," "no Buffy you don't i love you, always have, always will, know go back go back to your lovers arms."

"my what?"

Buffy started to shift her position, Spike leaped up and ran down the stairs,