It was a quiet Sunday evening. Willow was washing the dinner dishes and was lost in her thoughts as she was staring at the hot steam coming out of the sink. It wasn’t until the third ring that she came out of her daze just to realize that the phone was ringing. She dried her hands and answered it.

“Hello?”

“May I speak to Miss Willow Rosenberg?” a woman’s voice said on the other side of the line.

“I’m Willow Rosenberg,” she answered, a little concerned with the formality she was being addressed by, which could only mean that it was serious.

“My name is Dr. Roberts, and I’m calling you regarding the patient Buffy Summers…”

“Buffy???” Willow felt like she had been kicked in the stomach. She had to hold herself to the kitchen island. “Oh my God, is she…gone?”
She finally had the courage to ask, terrified of the answer that she had been expecting for the past 6 years.

“No, not at all, Miss Rosenberg, she is awake! She woke up this afternoon. I checked her file and I saw your name…”

“What?” she asked in shock as she dropped the phone to cover her mouth with both hands. “Oh my God, she’s awake!! Buffy is awake!” She felt the need to keep repeating it to herself, afraid that it wasn’t true. She realized then that the phone was on the counter as she heard the voice of the doctor “Hello? Miss Rosenberg? Are you still there?”

“I’m here, I’m sorry. It’s just that I can’t believe it, after all this time. How is she? Is she ok?” Willow asked nervously as she twisted the telephone cord.

“She is fine, considering the circumstances. I know it’s Sunday, but I was wondering if you could come. There are certain things that I need to discuss with you.”

“I’ll be right there.”

She flew up the stairs, looking for Tara. She and Willow had been living all this time at the Summers house. First they did it for Dawn, but years later after she left for college, they decided to stay there, in case a miracle happened. Willow found Tara reading in bed. Tara looked above her book, only to find a breathless Willow at the door, unable to move or speak.

“Willow, baby, what’s wrong?” Tara was concerned- she had never seen this look in Willow’s eyes, not since… ‘Oh my God- Buffy,’ she thought as she stood up and headed towards Willow.

“She’s awake, Tara!” Willow was finally able to say, although still unable to move.

“What? Willow, what are you talking about?” Tara held her arm, leading her to the bed so they both could sit.

“Buffy! Tara, Buffy is awake!” she finally said, breaking down in tears. “She is back, she is back!”

“Shh, I know, baby, that’s great news,” Tara said as she held her in her arms.

Twenty minutes later, Willow, Tara, Xander and Anya were sitting in the hospital, waiting for Dr. Roberts.

“Did you call Dawn?” Xander asked Willow.

“I tried, but all I got was her voice mail, and this is not news you want to break through an answering machine. Besides, I think it’s better to know a little more about the situation before we talk to her. But I did leave her a message to call me back A.S.A.P.”

They all nodded, knowing that she was right. They still didn’t know what to expect, and it would be cruel to give Dawn false hopes after everything she had been through.

“How about Giles?” Xander asked again as he kept walking back and forth across the waiting room, letting them know how nervous he really was.

“I called him on the way here,” Tara answered. “He is on his way. He’ll be on the first flight, so he’ll be here tomorrow.”

Again they all nodded and went back to silence. Xander kept walking; Willow couldn’t get her eyes away from the doctor’s door as Tara held her hand, not knowing what else to do to make this easier for her. It was Anya who broke the silence abruptly. “And how about Spike? Did anybody call him?”

“Well, I haven’t called him yet. You know the situation, and I don’t want to break this to him until we know for sure what to expect. I guess I’ll call him after we talk to Dr. Roberts,” Willow said in an apologetic way as she knew that he had a right to know what was going on.

“I just think he has a right to be here. After all, he is…” Anya couldn’t finish her sentence since the door finally opened and a tall brunette wearing a white coat came out.

“Please come in,” she indicated to them. After they were all seated in her tiny office, she gave them a warm smile as she proceeded to explain Buffy’s condition to them. “First of all, relax and lose those funeral faces- this is good news. Buffy woke up after 5 years, beating all the odds. So I would say that this is very happy news.”

As she smiled at them, they all smiled as a heavy weight had been lifted from them, and unconsciously, they all smiled at each other, Tara squeezing Willow’s hand gently.

“However,” the doctor continued with a more serious face. “We still don’t know where are we standing. We need to run some more tests to be able to determine her real condition.”

“But is she ok?” Willow asked, concerned.

“It’s hard to know right now. She woke up disoriented and scared, which is perfectly normal considering the situation. Physically, I can tell you she seems fine. She is a very strong woman, especially after being inactive for that long.”

“Can we see her?” Xander asked.

“I’m afraid not at the moment. As I mentioned to you before, she was very confused and disoriented, and we had to sedate her.”

“You put her back to sleep?” Xander asked, furious. “What’s your problem? She has been sleeping for the past 5 years, and the minute she wakes up, you decide to put her back to sleep?”

“I understand your frustration, but let me assure you that what we did was in her best interest. Just imagine the shock of waking up suddenly one day after 5 years, not knowing what happened or even where you were? We don’t know what’s going on in her brain, if she is even aware of her situation. There is a very good possibility that she would suffer some time of amnesia, which could be mild and temporary or…”

“Or what? Are you telling us that she could lose her memory forever?” Willow asked in shock as Tara gently put her arm around her shoulders.

“We don’t know yet, but right now it is a possibility. You have to understand this is new territory for us. There are only very few reported cases of patients that made it back after so long. So unfortunately at this point, everything is possible. We don’t exactly know the repercussions she could present.” She saw the broken look on the four peoples’ faces sitting in front her. “But we have every reason to believe that she is going to be ok. I’m hoping for the best. I have never seen such a strong woman. If she was able to come back, I’m confident she’ll be alright.”

“When will we know what to expect?”

“Tomorrow we’ll begin running some tests, so hopefully by tomorrow night we will have a more accurate diagnosis. However, there are some things that I can already tell you, like for example she is going to be needing physical rehabilitation for her extremities since she hasn’t use them in so long. So even if Buffy is fine, she won’t be going home right away. Also, I must warn you to be very careful with the information you decide to give to her, considering the trauma of being away for so long. I would strongly recommend that you keep shocking news away from her. We need to slowly bring her back to this new reality.”

“So we lie to her?”

“No, I’m not suggesting that you do so. All I’m saying is that she’ll need all the help she can get to make it back in the best possible way. What I’m recommending is that at first try to have things be as similar as possible of what they used to be before her accident. That way she will feel safer, and gradually, we can start giving her the information and filling her in.”

“Ok, I understand. Thank you, doctor,” Willow said with a warm smile. “So when do you think we can see her?”

“Tomorrow afternoon, we’ll know if she is in any condition to receive visits. Something that might help is if you bring her some personal belongings, like maybe some pictures.”

“Yeah, sure, I’ll bring some of her stuff tomorrow.” Willow shook the doctor’s hand, and they all left her office, still clueless and in shock.

After leaving the hospital, they all went to the Summers house to discuss the situation and to wait for Dawn’s call.

“So I guess Spike is out of the question?” Xander finally said.

“Well, you heard the doctor,” Tara said as she let herself fall onto the couch right next to Willow, who was now dinking drinking some coffee.

“But he needs to know!” Anya exclaimed.

“Fine, I’ll talk to him tomorrow and explain the situation. I’m sure he’ll understand,” Willow said, exhausted. “Xander, can you come with me? I think I’ll be needing backup.”

“Yeah, I’ll go.”

Suddenly, a loud ring made them all jump out of their skins. It wasn’t until the second ring that Willow realized it was her cell phone. She opened it and saw the Caller ID. “It’s Dawn,” she whisper to the rest, who gave her sympathetic looks as she held her breath and answered. ”Hello, Dawnie. Yes, I need to tell you something important. Yes, where are you? Good, you better be sitting down...”

After dropping Buffy’s personal belongings off at the hospital, Willow and Xander were on their way to meet Spike.

They both breathed deeply before ringing the bell. After a few seconds, Spike opened the door, wearing his usual black jeans and t-shirt.

“Red, Harris?” he said, surprised. “I didn’t expect you. Is everything all right?”

“Can we come in?” Xander asked with a serious face. Willow’s face wasn’t any friendlier. Spike realized what was going on, and he opened the door a little more, allowing them to come inside. “Of course, I’m sorry, have a seat, please. Can I offer you something to drink?”

“Yes,” Xander answered right away. “What’s the strongest thing you have?”

“I have some scotch. Are you alright, Harris? You’re freaking me out.”

“May I have some, please?” he said without answering his question.

“Sure.” He opened the bottle as he turned to ask him, “How do you want it?”

“However it is that you take it. Just make it double.”

“Suit yourself, mate. Here you go,” Spike said as he handed him a glass with straight scotch before sitting in the chair in front of them. “Now, tell me what’s the bloody problem already.”

“Here, Spike, this is for you.” Xander gave him the glass back. “Drink it.”

“What? Have you gone completely carrot-top?”

“Just drink it, Spike. Trust me, you’ll need it.”

“What’s your bloody problem?”

“Drink it, Spike,” Willow finally snapped as she opened her mouth for the first time since they arrived. Spike was shocked by her determination.

“Fine, but you better well tell me what the bloody problem is,” he said as he drank the whole thing in one big gulp before putting the glass on the table in front of him. “Done. Now why are you here?”

“Well, I don’t know how to make it easier, so I’ll just tell you- Buffyisawake!” Willow said without making any pauses.

“Say that again, Red, Because it sounded like you said that Buffy is awake,” he said in shock.

“That’s what I said.”

“But how? When?” He stood up and began walking back and forth like a lion in a cage.

“She woke up yesterday,” Xander said.

“Yesterday?” Spike looked at them, angry. “And you are just telling me now?”

“Well, it’s just that we needed to talk to the doctor first to find out the situation before we could…”

“Before what? Before you could decide what role I play in this? After all this time and everything that we have been through, you still don’t count me into your little group, huh?”

“I’m sorry. It was all very sudden, and we didn’t know how to tell you…”

“Just like that, Red! Bloody hell!” He suddenly realized that he had been too mad to even ask about her. “How is she?” His face and voice changed radically from angry to concerned, almost sweet.

“We still don’t know for sure,” Willow began softly, touched by the look on his face. “They are running some tests as we speak to determine her condition.”

“But is she going to be alright?”

“We really don’t know, Spike. There’s a good chance she’ll be suffering from some kind of amnesia, but we still don’t know how severe could it be.”

“I want to see her.”

“Spike, buddy, it’s not so simple,” Xander said as he stood up and walked to him. “The doctor said that we should avoid giving her shocking news, at least for a while, until she is ready to handle the truth.”

“So, what? I’m supposed to hide? No way! After all this time, she needs to know the truth.”

“Not right now. We don’t even know how much she can remember, and the doctor warned us that news like that could affect her really bad- she could go into some kind of shock. She asked us to try to act like we were 5 years ago so she can get used to her life again before we fill her in. Please, Spike- this is in Buffy’s best interest.”

“And how about me? And how about Isabelle? She has the right to know that she has a daughter.”

“I know, and she will. Just give it some time.”

“How about me? She knew me pretty well before the accident.”

“Well… you two didn’t have the best relationship at the time.”

“I get it- so you want me and my daughter to hide and pretend we don’t exist?”

“No, please don’t take it that way. Let’s just wait and see what she remembers first.”

“So she can remember how much she hated me? How she used me? How disgusted by me she was? Yeah, really looking forward to that. I’m sure she’ll love to hear that she had a baby with a man she despised, who was so beneath her.” There was so much bitterness in his words. He was still very hurt by her last words to him. “You are beneath me… I could never be your girl… There’s nothing good in you… I’m using you, and it’s killing me. I’m sorry, William.” For the last 5 years, these words had haunted him. Months later, after the big fight against Glory, Buffy ended up in a coma. It was a miracle that she survived that fall, and an even bigger miracle when they found out that she was pregnant and that the baby seemed fine. Nobody understood how was it possible that Buffy could be pregnant, and least of all carrying Spike’s baby, considering he was indeed a vampire and therefore was unable to have kids. For a while, they thought that it was probably Riley’s baby, even when they knew that him and Buffy had broken up a while ago, or maybe it belonged to some one else they didn’t know. But after Willow ran some mystical tests, they confirmed that the baby was indeed Spike’s and that the mystical powers that allowed that impossible conception had been the ones that had saved Buffy and the baby from dying.

Spike took off for a while after Buffy’s accident and learning about her pregnancy. They all thought he was gone for good. But they were amazed to see him return 3 months later, changed. He went to the end of the world to seek his missing part, the only thing that could make him worthy of this child, his and Buffy’s baby- his soul.

He came back a changed man, and eventually, they all realized how committed he was to the idea of taking care of this baby. He visited Buffy everyday at the hospital, where she was lying asleep. He watched her brokenheartedly as her stomach began getting bigger and bigger as the weeks passed by. He was present on the moment of the birth of his daughter.

He almost cried when he first set eyes on Isabelle. She was as beautiful as her mother; the only difference was that she had his blue eyes. Even Giles was touched by his sudden change. He moved into the Summers house to be close to her. He was in charge of the night-shift, and he enjoyed every single second of it. Isabelle slept during the day and stayed awake at night for the first 6 months of her life. First, they all thought that maybe she was half-vampire, but Willow concluded that she was human- she just liked to be with her father. From day one, they both shared a special connection and became inseparable. As she grew older, Spike could see that she looked more like her mom a little more every day and he loved that, but at the same time, it killed him, not only because it was a constant reminder that she never loved him, but mainly because she wasn’t there, that she was in a coma, lying on a hospital bed, instead of being with her daughter.

After visiting Spike, Willow went back to the hospital to see if they could finally see Buffy. After waiting a while, Dr. Roberts informed them that she was a lot calmer, but that she indeed was suffering from amnesia and didn’t seem to remember a lot of things, so they should be patient around her and try not to put too much pressure on her.

They opened the door nervously and found her sitting in her bed, staring at one of the pictures that Willow had brought them earlier. It was one of the three of them from high school. She looked up to see them and gave them a weak smile.

“Hey, Buffy,” Willow said shyly as they both walked to the bed.

“Hi,” she whispered.

“How are you feeling, Buffster?”

“I don’t know. It’s all so confusing. I know, I must know you, but I can’t seem to remember.” Buffy was scared.

“It’s ok, Buffy. The doctor says this is normal and that it will go away.”

“Yes, she told me the same thing.” She hesitated for a moment. “I’m sorry to ask this, but I can’t remember your name.”

“Buffy, that’s ok. I’m Willow, and this is Xander. We have been best friends for a long time. We went to Sunnydale High together. See this picture? This was our senior prom.” Willow sat on the bed next to her friend, who didn’t seem to mind that much as she showed her the picture. Xander still remained standing right next to the bed, not knowing what to do.

“Who is he?” Buffy asked as she pointed Giles out in a picture. “Is he my father?”

“No, sweetie, this is Giles. He is kind of like our father- he was your Watcher.”

“My Watcher? I don’t understand.”

“It’s ok, Buffy, you will know soon enough. Just try not to worry so much.”

“I know her,” she said as she saw a picture of her with Joyce and Dawn. “She is my mother, right?”

“Yes, Buffy, she is. See, it’s all coming back.”

“Oh my god, my mom… she’s dead, isn’t she?” Buffy began to cry.

“Yes, Buffy, I’m afraid so. I’m sorry.” Willow held her as she cried, and Xander still didn’t know what to do.

After a couple of minutes, she calmed down.

“Buffy, we better go and let you rest.”

“No, please stay, both of you,” she replied as she looked and smiled at Xander, who had remained silent the whole time. He smiled back and joined both girls on the bed. “I want to learn more about myself. Please show me more pictures.”

They spent nearly 2 hours showing her pictures and telling her about their adventures together. They kept their promise and avoided supernatural references and shocking news. She seemed to recognize Dawn, but she didn’t know exactly who she was. After some time, Xander relaxed and told Buffy all kinds of jokes before ending with the Snoopy dance, which cracked both girls up. She felt so much better, and even though she still couldn’t remember them, she felt safe around them.

“Buffy,” the doctor said as she opened the door. “I’m sorry to interrupt you, but it’s time for your physical therapy.”

“Ok,” Buffy said. “Thank you for coming, Willow.” She turned around to face her. “And Xander.” She turned again to face him with a smile. “Please come back soon. I want to hear more about my life.”

“Of course, we will be back soon, Buffy, and we’ll tell you everything you want. Next time, Dawn, Anya, Tara, and Giles will be here. They are all dying to see you.”

“Ok, I’m looking forward to it,” she said with a smile as the doctor helped her out of bed and into the wheelchair. She still couldn’t walk, and she hadn’t regained full mobility of her arms.

Buffy was getting better each day. She was now able to walk by herself, and she began remembering little things, usually about her childhood, but according to the doctor, that was normal, and she was confident that she would make a full recovery.

Every day, at least one of her friends stopped by to visit her. She was now familiar with all of them. She enjoyed their company and was looking forward to seeing them again, especially Dawn, her sister. She enjoyed their conversations the most when they talked about their parents and childhood.

One night, Buffy woke up and turned to look at the little clock on her night table, realizing that it was 3:00 am. That was one problem she had been having lately- she had a hard time sleeping through the night. Maybe it was because of the meds, or maybe because she was actually too tired to be sleeping. She decided to take a walk around the hospital’s halls. The nurses were used to it by now, and they usually let her wander around. They understood her need for exploring since she was basically rediscovering the world, and everything was a new experience for her.

As she walked through the halls, she felt like walking outside a little bit around the hospital’s gardens. The night was so calm- the sky was full of stars, and all you could hear were some crickets. She was enjoying nature so much since she woke up that she tried to be outside as often as possible. Buffy was so lost in her thoughts that she never saw him coming, and suddenly, she found herself crashing against his chest.

“AHH!” she screamed at first. “You scared me!” But she couldn’t see his face- it was too dark.

“Buffy?” he said, breathless.

“Yes,” she answered, intrigued to see who this man was that claimed to know her. She had become very open and curious since every person that know her had a piece of the puzzle. “Do I know you? Sorry, it’s just that I don’t remember.” She moved into the light to see the face of this mysterious man in front of her. He wasn’t very tall, all dressed in black and wearing a leather duster on top, blonde, almost white, curly hair, well-defined cheekbones… but what really got her attention was the pair of amazing blue eyes that were staring back at her.

“How are you?” Spike whispered. He still couldn’t believe who was in front him. It was her- his Buffy, flesh and bones, the woman he had loved so much, the mother of his daughter. But at the time, she was the same one who crushed his heart 5 years ago.

“Well, besides the fact that I was Sleeping Beauty and that one day I suddenly woke up and I can’t seem to remember a thing, I guess you could say that I’m okay,” she said with a smile, which made him laugh, looking at her tenderly. “But you never told me your name, and how is it that you know me?”

“My name is…” he hesitated for a few seconds before finally answering. “William. My name is William, pet.”

“William, that’s a pretty name.” She smiled at him. “William, how is it that you know me? And what are you doing here at 3:00 am? Are you a crazy patient here, too?” They both laughed. He couldn’t believe that for the first time, she was talking to him like she really cared- she had actually smiled at him on more than one occasion. But he didn’t know what was he going to tell her. He still didn’t know what he was doing here. She wasn’t supposed to see him- he was just planning on sneaking in to see her sleeping, like he used to do. But now she was in front of him, looking beautiful as always- well, maybe a little too skinny and pale- but she still looked adorable under the moonlight.

“I’m...”

“You have amnesia, too?”

“I guess you could say that we used to work together.”

“Oh!” Buffy was intrigued by the man in front of her. “So, tell me, William, what are you doing here?”

“Oh, just stopping by to make sure everything was okay.” He couldn’t help but smile at her. “You could say I’m kind of a security guard. I make sure that everything is okay and in order.” He didn’t want to lie to her more than he really needed to and that was half-true- he did patrol at night, so the name was just a technicality. “Why are you out here? Aren’t you supposed to be in bed?”

“I can’t sleep. I’m so tired of sleeping. From what I’ve heard, I’ve been sleeping for way too long. Besides, it’s a lovely night, isn’t it?”

“Indeed, it is.”

“So, William- care to keep me company?” she asked as she pointed to a little stone bench. “Unless you’re busy or if you don’t want to.”

He couldn’t believe it- she was asking him to stay with her. If only she was the real Buffy and not just some girl that looked like her.

“Sure,” he replied, sitting down next to her. “So, what’s on your mind, pet?”

Buffy and Spike talked all night, and for some reason, she found it easy to open up to him.


Thank you to my great Beta Allison.
Please review it means the world to me