"When are you guys actually planning on practicing? Cause if I came here for nothing and wasting all of my time I am seriously am going to get violent!" Cordelia whined to no one in particular.

"Oh yeah and that will really happen! Cause you might break a nail! Your such a priss and yes we are going to start practicing as soon as Spike and Buffy decide to show up! Sometimes they act so immature!" Faith replies.

"someone say my name luv?" Spike asks as he enters the room with his girlfriend Drusilla, otherwise known as slutzilla hanging on him like he was glued to her.

Someone comes running in and colliding with the bleached blond known as Spike. "Sorry... oh wait its you I retract that apology! Sorry I am late. You know how I am with traffic, I am still a little scared driving after that accident!" Buffy says shivering.

"Now seriously lets get practicing cause I have a date with Devon later." Cordelia says and EVERYONE rolls their eyes.

-----------------

Its after practice and Buffy was running late as usual, her mom was waiting for her at a restaurant to spend some quality time. Her sister was probably there too.

"Sorry, Sorry, I am late Mom. Dawnie how are you? How's school?" Buffy asks sitting down.

"Buffy I have missed you so much, Everyone at school so does not believe you are totally my sister. Though they know you did go to our school. They want your band to perform at our school!" Dawn says hyperly.

"Dawn Calm down your sister just got here!" Joyce says calmly.

"But mom!"

"Leave your sister alone!"

"Fine!" she slumps in her seat.

"Dawnie I will talk with the band and our manager and maybe he'll let us do a performance! I miss you too!" Buffy says! "So mom how is the gallery? I haven't been able to visit it lately."

"It's fine we have a new artist! Mrs. Rosenberg, Willow's mom. She is very talented and getting us alot of new business, and Dawn is even helping out!"

Buffy could hear how proud her mother was of her sister, her sister always did right. She had always been the good girl of the family. It's not like Dawn had gotten kicked out of the school in L.A. for burning down the gym. Not that Buffy had meant it! It had just kinda happened. Then when Buffy had quit school to become a singer that had really been a downfall for her mom. Even though the band was oober famous her mom still just wasn't as proud of her as her sister, cause Dawn was a senior and Dawn was getting her DIPLOMA.

"Buffy! Buffy, dear are you alright? You seemed to be off in space!" Said mom drifted through her thoughts.

"yeah I am fine." The rest of dinner was about how much Dawn had accomplished.

-------

"I just don't understand what's so great about Dawn! She doesn't do anything. Wow shes going to graduate. Woopedy do da day! I am in a FAMOUS rock group! I am dating a MULTIMILLIONAIRE! I am RICH! What am I not doing right to have my mom LOVE me, for her to be PROUD of me? Willow I need help!" Buffy cried to her best friend and room mate.

"Buffy your mom loves you, and she is proud she just doesn't show it! Why don't we go to that party? You said everyone else is going! Why not go?" Willow asks.

"Yeah I need this! I am going, and I am going to have a good time! I am going to forget about everything!"

"Right! Your going to have a good time!"

"Yeah and your going to be good right?"

" I am going to have fun!"

"And your going to be good right?"

"Sure right!"

"Good girl now get ready!"

-------
AN HOUR LATER
-------

Buffy had gotten ready! She was excited! Though Angel was out of town she was going to have fun! He was always out of town lately! With his friend Parker, and Parker's sister Darla. Not that she had any room to complain when he was here she was out of town with the band. Sometimes being famous just didn't mean much! She sometimes missed school, and sometimes she missed having time! But she loved her band, she loved the power she had over the crowd and the freedom to write songs, though they had to be approved by the group. They all pitched in songs and then voted! It was great to be part of something. She felt like someone, like a part of something bigger. She still got into alot of trouble but she didn't do alot of illegal things anymore. They wrote about her in the papers. Well her and spike. They were notorious to have BIG fights durning their concerts. That's why people liked them, their fights were bad. It was cause they literly hated, HATED each other. Though Anya, Xander's girlfriend (He is the band's manager) always said it was because deep down they wanted to give each other MANY orgasm's which is so not true. Ick Spike is so disgusting with his slut bag of a girlfriend! Who would screw anyone, she could! And she did!

"Buffy are you ready? Cause if you aren't I will totally leave without you and you will have to drive over yourself! Oz's band is playing at this party, and you know me being all Oz fan gotta be there! I love him so much!"

"Aw I know you do sweety, just one more minute, I am trying to tie this damn dress! It's too damn hard!" When Buffy fell over Willow came out of her dream like state.

"A little help here Will!"

"Oh yeah here!" Willow ties the dress and then helps Buffy up.

"Thanks will your a life saver!"

"Life saver that's me! Look in the dictionary next to the word there's definitely a pic of me!"

Buffy just laughed and smiled at willows rambling.
"I am rambling again aren't I? I just am excited to be near my boyfriend when he plays tonight! Me Oz's gal!"

"AW no prob will your rambling is cute!"


______________________________________________________________________
Next Chapter is going to be the party cause alot is gunno go on there and its going to be really angsty and dramatic! Review please and be truthful cause I can take it! Also I am looking for a beta!

Buffy had picked out a black halter dress to wear it was simple but beautiful. She hadn't wanted to draw attention to herself as she knew Cordelia would. Even in High school Buffy hadn't liked to draw attention. Good luck with that she was famous, she ALWAYS drew attention, especially when near Spike or Slutzilla.

"Yoohoo Buffy, earth to Buffy, you there? Or well here?" Willow asked.

"Of course, sorry just thinking. Thank you so much for driving! After the "accident" I still can't seem to feel comfortable to drive. I swear Spike was trying to kill me!" She shudders and thinks back to that dreadful day!

-------
1 month ago
-------

"I hate you Spike, you know that! I fucking HATE you! Don't touch me ever again! Don't even talk to me ever again, unless it's band related! Don't even look at me! Keep yourself and your slutty girlfriend away from me!" Buffy screamed at him, then stormed out to her car.

About a minute later her phone started ringing, she looked at the caller ID hoping it might be Angel, or even Willow. But no such luck it was Spike so she ignored it. Then a few minutes ran by and the phone rung again, this time it was Faith's number so she answered!

"Luv, just listen to me. Don't hang up! I didn't say anything!" Spike said.

"Listen up, I'm not your love or anything else! I hate you! You so did tell everyone! How else did they find out?" Buffy shouted.

"Did not! Plus I have better things to do then talk about you!"

"Like your slut girlfriend!"

"She's not a slut! You silly bint!"

"Whatevs bleach boy!"

"You know what Buffy? Fuck you!" Spike screamed over the phone.

At that Buffy had lost control of the steering wheel cause she hadn't been paying attention. Her car flipped 3 times, finally stopping in a ditch, she was knocked unconscious when her head had hit the steering wheel. Her cell phone was still gripped in her hand.

-------
End flashback
-------

"Buffy your seriously starting to freak me out!" Willow says bringing Buffy out of her memory.

"Sorry Will, just remembering the accident! So you and Oz, how goes it?"

"Oh! You know, Oz he's so dreamy." She sighs.

"Will, wipe that drool away!" Buffy jokes.

"Huh, drool? Where?" She freaks out rubbing her mouth.

"Chill Willow I was just kidding!"

"Oh a joke! Hah!"

They pull up into the VIP parking area to the party. A bouncer is standing guard at the door with the party guest list. There is a line behind ropes to get into the club as normal.

"Summers comma Buffy." Buffy says glancing at the bouncer.

"Enter hold up girly! Your name!" He says putting his arm out in front of Willow.

"Hold up Buddy, She's my date!" Buffy glares at him.

He smiles and then laughs. " I know I was just picking on Willow. Her mom and I go way back. By the way how is your mom Willow?"

"Oh hey Randy, She's fine I guess. Haven't talked to her in the last week!" She says and then enters the doors.

-----
The actual Party
-----

"Wow, these things sure are Jazzy. I'm going to go find Oz, are you going to be okay?" Willow asks.

"Yeah of course, you go have fun!"

"Are you sure?"

"Will if you don't leave I'm going to kick your ass!"

"I'd like to see you try! Have fun! This is my resolve face so make sure you do it!" She says turning around and running off!

God how much I hate parties. I'm so lonesome. And oh lookey drinks. Just what I need right now! She walks over to the bar.

"How about some Vodka on the rocks?" She asks the bartender

"Sure lady, coming right up!"

The bartender puts a napkin down on the bar and then a cup filled with ice. He goes and gets the bottle of vodka and fills the cup up. Just the courage she needs to face the party. She took the cup and downed it making a gasping sound then put it down for him to fill it again. She downs that one too. She then remembered why she didn't normally drink, Buffy and drinking was a non-mixy thing. She was feeling really tipsy. When the bartender filled her glass again she started sipping on it. Spotting someone she didn't want to see, she turned around towards the bar, so he wouldn't see her. But of course her luck tonight was non-existent.

"Hello luv, all alone?" said person asked.

"For your information not that its any of your fucking business, but no I am not alone!" She bit at him.

"Ooh kittens got claws! So captain foreheads here? where is he?" He says scanning the crowd.

"No Willows here with me!"

"Ah so gone to the dark side I see!"

"No Angel happens to be out of town! Where's Slutzilla? I mean what's here face? Nope I actually meant slutzilla!"

"Don't call her that! She's on a business trip!"

"Whatevs leave me alone!"

He looked down at her drink. "I never figured you as a vodka kinda bird, more of a cosmopolitan, sex on the beach kinda chick!" He says with a wink. "Maybe even a champagne kinda bint!"

"You disgusting pig! You don't know me worth shit! Now leave!" She said pushing him. He stayed much to her annoyance.

"I'm a brandy kind of bloke myself. It has more of a bite. You should try it!" He suggests.

"If you insist on staying shut up! Don't talk! Leave me ALONE! Leave. Me. Alone." She says poking his chest with each word.

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

She downed the rest of her drink, and got another. She was starting to feel good, more care-free and more tipsy. She was getting very drunk! She downed two more. Giggling she looked at the bleached blond next to her.

"Hey good looking!" She giggled flirtatiously.

"Luv, what the hell is wrong with you? Can't a bloke mind his own business like you told him too?"

"But Spikey! I wanna play!" she said placing her hand on his leg and then rubbing it, her hand getting higher. He grabbed it.

"Play with fire little girl and your gunna get burned!"

"Maybe I wanna burn! Burn me ssspike!" She says trying to wink but miserably failing and ended up blinking instead almost falling out of her stool.

"Your drunk, go bug another git!"

"I don't want another git" she laughed "Git what a weird word! Git hahaha! I want you!"

"Buffy! Seriously your drunk!"

"We've essstablissshed that!"

"Fine!"

"Yay!" She says leaping into his lap kissing him. The only coherent though in her head was 'Spike lips, lips of spike! He tastes so... yummy!'

___________________
next chapter is going to finish what happens! Give me some input what should happen should she wake up to find spike in her bed or not even know it happened?

Buffy snuggles into her pillow and sighed. Her head was killing her
and she wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep, but something
caught her attention. Her pillow was hard, and smooth, not very pillow
like. It was moving, and breathing. Her eyes snapped open, her arms
were wrapped around a nice pale, but toned chest. Her eyes flickered to
the persons face and she shot out of bed. It took her a moment to
realize she was naked. She ran over to her door and grabbed her
bathrobe.

"Spike wake up you disgusting pig!" She yells at him.

"What are you doing in m' bed?" Spike asks disoriented.

"Your in my bed! What did you do to me you fucking asshole?"

"I didn't do anything to you, you silly little bint! Can you keep it
down? M' head hurts!"

"You definitely did! I woke up naked! N-A-K-E-D! You know what Spike
I'm going to take a shower! Be gone before I'm back or more than just
your head's going to hurt!" She said crossing the room.

She slams her bathroom door shut before he has anytime to respond to
her. She leans against the bathroom door, and slides down. Hiding her
face in her hands, tears cascading down her cheeks. "Nothing happened!
Nothing happened we just happened to wake up in the same bed together.
There's nothing wrong with that!" She mutters to herself. Finally she
gets up and throws her robe on the floor and steps into the shower.

-------

When she came out of the shower she put her robe back on, and peeked
out of the door. He was definitely gone. She sagged in instant relief.
Though she felt empty, but that was surely because she hadn't seen
Angel in a month! She decided to clean her room, and have a relaxing
day. A few minutes later her phone beside her bed started ringing, she
walked over and picked it up hoping it wasn't Spike.

"Hello?" She answered.

"Hey Buffy its me Angel. I have missed you so much!"

"Oh my goodness Angel don't call for a month why don't you?" She
snapped at him.

"Bad mood I guess, well I want to take you out for dinner tonight as
a sorry for not being here lately. Do you want to go?" He asked.

"Of course I do!"

"Good we have reservations at the Bella Rose at 8! I will pick you up
at 7! So be ready! I have to go so see you later Buffy!" He said
hanging up the phone without letting Buffy say goodbye.

She sighed, she felt weird talking to Angel. She didn't think she
loved him anymore. He was different than when they first got together.

------
Four months earlier
------

"Let's go to that club the bronze is it? I heard that Dingoes at my
baby is playing there. It would be nice to have a night off and listen
to someone else's music. And to dance." Faith said.

"Oh yeah Devon mentioned they were playing there. Oz is going to be
there too Willow! You should come with us." Cordelia answers for once
being nice.

"Yeah, yeah I will come." Willow says excitedly.

Buffy was just planning on staying home, she didn't want to do
anything. She wanted to be alone. Lately she was tired, and didn't want
to hang with anyone. Fate had another thing coming for her.

"Buffy, so you'll drive us home after right? I mean you don't want us
to hit anyone do you?" Riley asked.

"Of course not! Take a cab, I wanna go home and lounge around!" Buffy
said.

"Nope your coming end of story!" Willow said giving her resolve face.

Buffy sighed.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

They had just gotten to the Bronze, Buffy driving everyone. The music
was loud even out here. Riley's girlfriend was going to meet up with
them, everyone hated the ditz except for Cordelia. They had been BFF's
in school. Harmony was a sleaze. She even came onto Spike, not that
Buffy cared or anything. She just didn't want anyone to get hurt. Willow
was getting a ride with Xander and Anya. So it had been just the band
in the car. Spike had sat next to her.

"Hey it's The Sexi five! Someone shouted, and a bunch of teeny
boppers ran over to them. They signed a bunch of autographs for their
fans and then finally went in.

It was depressing all the couples in the club and Buffy was single. Faith had a playboy, Riley had Harmony, Cordelia had Devon, and Spike he had a bitch of a girlfriend. She was
the only one who wasn't in a relationship. She sighed as everyone went
to the dance floor.

She walked over to the bar. There was an attractive brunette guy at
the end of the bar. As she ordered her drink she could feel his eyes on
her. She looked his way and motioned for him to join her. He came over.

"My names Liam Angel. I couldn't help but look at you, and your
exceptional beauty!"

"Oh I'm Buffy, Buffy Summers. Thanks for the compliment. I have heard
of you! Your my dad's business partners son!" Buffy blushes as she
explains.

"Oh your Hank summers daughter?" He asked.

"Yeah one of them."

"I saw a picture, it definitely doesn't do you any justice!"

Buffy blushed at the compliment. She really liked him, even though she had just met him. He was gorgeous and nice. He was kind of dry like Riley but still everyone had to have a downside.

Buffy and Angel talked for hours, about everything under the son.
They became good friends instantly. It was like she knew him forever.
So when he asked her out it was no suprise she said yes.

And the rest is as they say history!

--------
end flashback
--------

Buffy put on a simple black dress that she knew Angel loved, and swept her hair into an elegant but simple up-do. She had just put the finishing touches on her hair when the doorbell rang. She hopped to the door trying to get her shoe on.

"Hey baby, you look wow, amazing!" Angel said giving her yet another necklace. "This is what I found for you while I was away. I saw it and thought instantly of you! Darla said I was crazy for buying it but I just couldn't help it!"

"Thank you will you put it on me please?" Buffy asked turning around for him to put it on.

He put it on gently, then said "come on lets go, were running late!"

She opened the door so they could leave and stopped cold at who was on the other side!
_____________________________________________________________________
Yeah so that's this chapter. Tell me what you think. I haven't had much band scenes so I think I am going to have the mysterious person on the other side of the door, then how the band met. If you guys have any questions, comments, concerns, critiques, or even suggestions tell me. Please review I will write back to you. I really enjoy every ones reviews.

Buffy was still standing at the door staring at whoever was on the other side of it. She couldn't seem to move.

"What are you doing here?" She asked through her gritted teeth.

"What no hello for your father?"

"Your not my father, you may have been once but not anymore! What are you doing here?" she asked again.

"I'm just paying you a little visit, daughter." He says brushing her out of the way going inside to the living room.

Buffy growled but shut the door anyways knowing this visit wasn't good. Still she tried to compose herself.

"Hello Liam, I haven't seen you in quite awhile. Though your father tells me about your adventures." Hank says winking. Buffy looks at Liam hoping he will explain, he just looks away. She pushes it out of her mind.

"Yeah well Buffy I'm going to go. Don't worry about our dinner. I'll talk to you later." He says walking out the door. Buffy wonders whats up. Everything today was strange. He hadn't even kissed her goodbye. The world kept throwing lemons at her.

"My darling eldest, how are you?"

"Cut the bullshit Hank! This is the last time I am going to ask you, what are you doing here?" She tried to remain calm.

"Fine you caught me, this isn't a friendly little visit. I need you to marry one of my business associates. He's about to die and his last wish is to get married to a young girl. Seeing as your eighteen your constituted as a young girl. When he marries you and then dies I become a whole lot richer and I'll pay you for your trouble's Daughter."

"Get out! GET OUT NOW YOU FUCKING BASTARD!" Buffy screams at him.

"Elizabeth, just imagine the publicity you'll get. You'll be in the lime light."

"My answer is no, and always will be no. Stay away from Mom and Dawnie! If you ever come back here your going to regret it!" She balled her fists.

He walked towards the door muttering how much of a bitch she was. As soon as he went out the door Buffy went to lock it.

She then went to her room and laid on the bed. When her parents divorced she had believed it was her fault. That had been until she had overheard her mother tell an old family friend that Hank had been cheating on her with his young secretary. Truly she had believed that her problematic days in L.A. had caused the divorce and their move to Sunnydale. Not that she cared, she loved Sunnydale it was home, she had everything she needed and wanted here.

Another thing was wrong though. Angel. He was acting weird, he hadn't touched her since he left a month ago. Though even then he only kissed her cheek. Also what had Hank meant when he winked at Angel about his adventures. She didn't know what to think but she trusted Angel.

Her thoughts were interrupted by her phone. "Hello?" She answered.

"Buffy guess what!" Her mom shouted excitedly.

"An Apocalypse is coming?" She asked.

"No of course not! I don't know how some of these things enter your head. Rupert asked me to marry him!"

Buffy's jaw dropped and it took her a few minutes but she finally said congratulations, and hung up on her mom. The phone rang again but she ignored it. It kept ringing and she disconnected it.

Tears ran down Buffy's face. She hadn't wanted to hear who was going to be in the wedding so she had to hang up. Her mom and her had been close in L.A. but when they moved to Sunnydale, they had drifted apart. They had moved when Buffy was only fifteen and Dawnie thirteen. The year after the move Buffy had dropped out and joined the band. They had never been the same after that.

-----
How the band got together
-----

Buffy had been getting restless She hated school, especially since rat face had been following her all week. It wasn't like she was going to do anything. Maybe it had to do with the fact that her and Spike had gotten into a fist fight last week. Totally not her fault!

"B, what are you doing here?" Faith asked the young blond girl who was under the bleachers.

"Hiding from rat face!" Buffy had said, the dark haired girl smiled.

"Well mind if I join you?"

"Go ahead this is your place!"

"B, come over tonight I want you to join my band, you are just what we need! Someone really wild like me!"

"OK sure, why not I am bored. Who's all in it?"

"Come over and find out!"

_____

Buffy had snuck out her window and ran to Faith's house, she was really excited. Faith was legendary.

"Welcome B, to the sexi five. Seeing as how your going to be the fifth. If anyone has a problem bring it up to me now!" Faith glared at the other blond who was holding a guitar. Buffy would never have admitted it to anyone but when she first saw Spike a year ago she had the biggest crush on him. He was the hottest guy she had ever seen, but instead of them getting along they became enemies.

"Spike have a problem, or are you grumbling new lyrics?" Faith asked.

"No, no problem. If you want her in she's in. As long as she can sing."

Buffy had smiled brightly and sung and all of them were stunned at how good she could sing, and she was in. The next day she had quit school much to her mothers dismay. Faith had let her move in with her. When they hit fame the rest was history.

-------
end flashback
-------

Buffy smiled at the memory. She loved her band. She loved singing. Before Spike had started dating the Slut they had gotten along for once. He even started teaching her how to play the guitar. But that was history now that the slut was in the picture.

A knock on the door brought her out of her thoughts once again.

"Why is today going so wrong?" She muttered to herself.

She opened the door hoping it wasn't Hank and at least the powers that be were listening to her there. IT was her mother.

"Buffy Anne Summers, why the hell did you hang up on me?"

Buffy stared at her mother completely flabbergasted. "Just leave me alone and go back to your family!"

Joyce looked at her weird. "Buffy you are my family. Are you okay?" She asked.

Buffy broke down in tears and slid to the floor. Joyce sat down and pulled her into her arms and rocked her. Buffy slowly fell asleep in her mothers arms. Joyce went and called Rupert and Dawnie and decided to stay there for the night. She wanted to have a talk with her eldest daughter. Obviously she was upset and needed help.

____________________________
Next chapter is going to be Buffy and Joyce. Buffy is going to get alot of her feelings out! Review please. I really need reviews to see how I am doing. Give me ideas too please. I really like getting feedback. So yeah. I also might get a little more in dept with the Spike/Buffy relationship of the past.

Joyce had let Spike in. He had told her that he had left something there. She was glad that he had come. She wasn't strong enough to carry her daughter, and she didn't want to wake her. Plus she didn't want Buffy to sleep on the cold floor. Spike had picked Buffy up, and she had instantly cuddled to him. She looked more like her little girl in his arms than the lost lamb she had been on the floor. Joyce had stored that in her memory. Buffy had even mumbled her love for Spike, making Joyce ask herself what was going on.

Joyce settled herself in one of the many guest rooms. She would talk to Buffy in the morning.

-----
The next morning
-----

Buffy woke up to the wonderful smells of pancakes. It reminded her of when she was younger, and her mother would cook breakfast every morning. She frowned at the painful memory. Getting up she wondered how she got to her bed and who was cooking. She grabbed her bathrobe. She walked to the kitchen.

"Morning Buffy. I hope you don't mind I made some chocolate pancakes. I hope they are still your favorites." Her mother says.

"Mommy? What are you doing here?" Buffy asks and Joyce hears the lost little girl in her voice.

"Honey, somethings bothering you!" She states the obvious "It has been for too long. I want to be close again like we were in L.A. I wanna work things out! So how about we talk about Everything?"

Buffy nodded "After breakfast though." Breakfast was eaten in silence. Buffy was terrified of what her mother was going to think about her when she said everything. They finally completed the meal and then went to sit on the couch. Buffy decided that she would just come out with it.

"What I have to say wont be easy, it wont be nice, but please no matter what do interrupt me! I wont be able to complete everything. Agreed?" Buffy asks.

"Agreed."

"In L.A. I got into a fight with this guy, he had been my friend. Well I though he had been. He was so angry and he had hit me, I wanted to do something, anything. I don't know, I was just mad at everything. I had just found out that we were moving and you guys had just gotten divorced! I lit my friends coat on fire. I was so upset, I threw it and the gym started on fire. It gave me satisfaction. Then we moved.

I always blamed myself for your guys divorce because I started acting out. When we moved I guess I don't know I just didn't like how I was. When I first saw Spike, I thought oh wow this place isn't going to be so bad. I thought he was the hottest thing I had seen ever! Then me and him kind of got together... We had gone to The Bronze and I had a few drinks, not enough to get me completely drunk but enough to get me tipsy. I met him there and we had a one night stand. It was totally stupid but I really liked him!

I took off into the night after he had fallen asleep. He was pissed. He had been my first... It was.. it was the most wonderful thing ever. It was then that I realized how much danger I was in. I liked him too much. SO I...." She trailed off tears falling silently out of her eyes.

"I guess he didn't think I was all that great in bed. He would taunt me. Saying all these terrible things. One day it grew to be too much. So we started the physical parts of our fighting. He always said that it was a dance. We got suspended.

After that Principal Snyder started following us. I was hiding under the bleachers when Faith came. She told me to stop by her house that night. I snuck out. Well, by then I had, had my miscarriage..." Buffy choked out. Her mother gasped and grabbed Buffy and held her tightly. The tears were pouring out of both of their eyes now. "Oh my god Buffy why didn't you tell me?"

"Mom... No interruptions remember? But we weren't... close anymore. Any... anyways. I went to her house. They had a band. Faith wanted to initiate me. I guess she had heard me sing. Spike hadn't said a word. They all heard me sing and I was immediately part of their group. Though the next day Spike kisses me. I was b...broken still from my miscarriage. I had wanted the baby. I had wanted a piece of him. I never told him about it though. When he kissed me I lost it and beat him to a bloody mass. I had been crying. I guess Snyder found us a few minutes later and I got kicked out of school. I made it like I dropped out so you wouldn't be disappointed. Then when you couldn't bare the sight one me anymore I moved in with Faith. Over time Spike forgave me and we got close again." Buffy smiled lost in her thoughts.

"He taught me to play the guitar. Things were great. We played at The Bronze. We were immediately signed on a record label. Things were looking up. That was until Drusilla came along. She sleeps with everyone. She cheats on him, but he wont listen to me anymore. A major riff between us was because of her. She's his 'Dark Princess' and he only believes her.

I had really wished by then that me and you wouldn't fight every time we saw each other I really wanted to tell someone. I have never told anyone any of this really. After we got signed I had alot of money so I moved out of Faith's and into this place. I just wanted to make you proud of me. Well four months ago I met Angel. He's older, richer, and hes normal. I guess he's what I want. I don't love him but he's nice. The day he left to Europe a month ago was the day the tabloids and everyone else found out that I had once slept with Spike. That was the day of my accident. The day I almost died, I had lost control of the car and flipped. He had said he didn't tell anyone, but he was the only other person who knew so he had to. I actually wanted to died. After all that I kept screwing everything up.

I may be your blood but we aren't family. You have Dawnie! Your perfect daughter. Someone to be proud of! The one whose going to graduate. The one who does no wrong. The one to brag about to your garden friends. I'm a black sheep. So go home mom back to Giles and Dawnie. Go home have your wedding and FORGET ME!"

Joyce looked at her daughter she looked so broken. Her heart broke with all the heart wracking sobs, and grief, she wanted to help her daughter. She wished Buffy hadn't had to go through this at such a young age.

"Oh Buffy. My sweet daughter. You are my family! I want things right with us. I want us to be close again. I am PROUD of you! Nothing will ever change that. I want you to be okay. I cant believe you've been through so much! Will you please see a psychologist? You need to talk to someone. TO get help. So that you'll feel better. I know that I cant promise that things will be great instantly but they will start to work out!" Joyce pleaded.

"OK Mommy." Her daughter said. "Mommy can I come stay with you?" she asked softly.

"Of course. My house is your house. Now as I wanted to ask you and get a happy mood out of you. Do you want to... would you want to be my maid of honor?" Joyce asked nervously.

"Really?" Buffy asked hopefully.

"Yes, that's why I called yesterday, but someone hung up on me!"

It all seemed like a life time ago. But Buffy could tell that things would get better between her mother and her.

------

Buffy had told Willow that she was going to stay with her mom for awhile, and Willow had told Buffy it was about time.

-----

When Dawnie had seen her she had launched herself at Buffy glad to see her sister again. Giles had welcomed Buffy, they had always been close. That was a month ago. Her mother and her were alot closer. Doing many many things together. They went out to lunch everyday. When Buffy had moved back to her own apartment, she went and had dinner every other day at her moms. They were planning her wedding stuff. Although the band had practice and stuff, they hadn't had any major events until today. It had been two months since their last concert. Buffy was excited but very nervous. The band had a new song they were going to play.

Her mother, Giles, Dawnie, Willow, and of course Xander and Anya were back stage. The concert was in L.A. She was getting nervous, by the time had come. She stepped up to the microphone.

Life is a metaphor
For meaningless pain.
Life is a pain
in which we hate.
Something we have no control over
Something to make us restless.
Love is something we seek
Grinding our feelings to dust
Clenching our teeth giving into lust
Never once to be just
to be with me...

--------

Buffy was on the right track with her life. She had been more into life and everyone around her had noticed. Her therapy sessions had helped. She actually liked going knowing they were helping her.

"Wow B, that song was wow! So deep. You always know how to make someone feel the music." Faith Patted her back. Buffy hadn't seen Angel but she didn't care. She wanted to break up with him anyways. Her therapist Dr. McClay or Tara made her realize that he was bringing her down.

"Buffy can we talk?" Spike asked.

"Um okay, I guess." She said.

"So luv, what have you been up to?" He asked.

"Nothing much just hanging. I guess you could say. What's this about Spike?"

"Buffy, Drusilla says she wants to tell you about Angel. How's hes been sleeping with Darla. Darla's one of Dru's friends. She just wanted you to know." Spike says walking off. It gave Buffy the perfect reason to break up with him.

-----

Buffy had called Angel telling him to come over. She got every single thing he had ever given her and put it into a box. When he got there she thrust the box in his hands. He smiled until he saw what it was and she told him that she never wanted to see him or his 'girlfriend' and to leave her alone. She told him to go to hell. He left and she felt better. Her life was on track again. Only was it?

-----

She had the flu, and her mom made her come stay with her until she was better. Not that Buffy minded. Her mom made her chicken noodle soup, and tea. Her friends brought over movies, and they would lounge around watching them, even allowing Dawnie to join them. Her mom was babying her, and she secretly was loving the attention. Dawnie would even come in to her room and read to her, just to spend time together. Although something at the back of her head kept trying to tell her something was wrong.

"Mom, I'm scared!" Buffy whispered to her mother.

"Why?" Her mother asked panicking.

"I haven't had my period in two months!"

"Oh Buffy! I am bringing you to the doctors!"

-----

The doctors had confirmed her suspicions, that she didn't have the flu, but she was in fact two months pregnant. Although she didn't know who the father was. She hadn't had sex with anyone since she was fifteen. And her mind was trying to process all the information. Now she had to tell her mother. She walked out to the waiting room. Walking over to her mother.
"Mommy... I'm... Pregnant!"

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I end the chapter with this. I know I know its weird but hey it was fun! This is loosely based on a recent argument with my mom and me! REVIEW, REVIEW, AND REVIEW please!

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