disclaimer-all BTVS/ATS characters belong to Joss...anyone I may make up belongs to me...
----------------------

Coming Home

“It’ll be okay”, the doctor said. “She should be back to normal in no time.” Joyce Summers nodded looking over at her daughter.

It had been almost six years since she had really got the chance to talk to her. Buffy Anne Summers had been in a coma-like state since she was 15 years old. She would wake only so often speaking of demons, witches, and vampires. She was now 21. Joyce wondered how her daughter would ever be alright. There was so much that she had missed in the years she had spent in institution after institution. The current one being North Side Medical.

They had moved to Los Angeles in 99 in hopes that Dr. David B. Anderson, a specialist in psychology, could help them bring their daughter back to them. At first he seemed to be making progress, but as time when on, nothing changed for the better. Now, three years later, they were taking Buffy home.

Joyce had gotten a job at a local gallery a couple of months after they had moved to the big city so they would be able to pay all of the hospital bills. Hank’s real-estate job was being put on hold, and he was only able to sell a few houses. They not only had the hospital bills, and the bill to their apartment, but they had also kept their house back home, so that if and when Buffy was better they could take her back to where she grew up. They figured that would be the best thing for her. Because of this, Joyce had decided to get her a job. She hadn’t expected to enjoy it so much. To be honest, it had given her an escape from the reality of her daughter’s condition. But now Buffy was better and they were going back home.

The Summers family lived in Modesto California. Joyce and Hank had both grown up there. They had met in high school and been together ever since. Buffy had always said growing up that she wanted to end up just like her parents. Now; however, she wasn’t so sure.

Buffy shifted uncomfortably in her chair. Her mom was still looking at her and it was starting to get annoying. She was just ready to get out of this crazy bin. Her decision to stay in this world had been a hard one. It had been difficult to see which world was real. Now that she thought about it, she realized that even considering that her “fantasy world” had been real was stupid. A world with vampires and demons…yeah right. She could only wonder how her mind had concocted all of that. They say what you dream about is what’s in your subconscious. If that were true, she must have some really screwed up subconscious.

She was pulled out of her thoughts by her mother.

“C’mon sweetheart. It’s time to go.” Buffy stood up from her chair and her mother took her by the arm. “We’re going to go home now.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The car ride was a long one. The whole way Buffy’s parents had been going on and on about how excited they were to be taking her home and how much there was to teach her. Her mother had also added in that Buffy would of course be going to school to get her GED and college, yes, she must go to college.

Buffy had tuned them out most of the way, just staring at the scenery through the window. She didn’t remember ever seeing any of it.

When they finally arrived at Casa de Summers Buffy was the first one out of the car. Three hours of riding in a car with your parents could drive anyone mad. Hank grabbed the bags out of the back as Joyce went to open the door. They walked inside and Buffy instantly noticed how clean everything was considering the family hadn’t been in the house for 3 years.

“Linda comes and cleans the house once a week. We wanted it to look good when we got back.” Buffy nodded. She started towards the stairs. “I’m gonna fix myself a sandwich, would you like one?” Joyce asked.

“Sure,” she replied walking up the steps. She reached her bedroom door and opened it. It looked like the bedroom she remembered having as a kid. The light pink walls with the unicorn wallpaper made the room fit for a 7 year-old. She would need to do something about that. Buffy walked over and sat on her small twin bed. That would have to be replaced as well.

Joyce entered the room carrying a tray with a sandwich and glass of milk. She sat it on the dresser. “It’s the same as you left it. We didn’t touch anything. I figure you’ll want to make some changes. I can take you to Home Depot if you want.” Joyce noticed how her daughter didn’t seem to be paying that much attention to what she was saying. “Buffy?”

Buffy’s head snapped towards her. “Huh? Yeah…Home Depot…sure.” Joyce was giving her a concerned look.

“Honey, are you alright?”

“Yeah. I’m fine.” She didn’t look too convinced. “Really mom. I’m good. I just need…some fresh air. I think I’m gonna go for a walk.” She got up off of the bed and started towards the door.

“Just be home by 5. Okay?” Buffy looked back and nodded.

“Okay.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It was a nice day outside. The sun was shining, and there was a nice breeze blowing. Buffy closed the front door and started towards the side walk when she saw her dad. He was still unloading the car, and it looked like he had help. She stepped closer to find out who it was.

“So I hear your starting over at CSU this fall,” she heard her father say.

“Yes sir. I’m finally gonna get somewhere.”

“That band of yours not working out?”

“We do okay, but to be honest I really wanna be a teacher.”

“Well good for you son.” Buffy rounded the side of the car. Her dad was standing next to the back of their SUV that currently had a male butt sticking out of it.

“Oh Buffy,” he said noticing her. “There is someone I would like you to meet.” The man leaned out of the car with a box in his hands. He sat it down and looked at her. As soon as he did Buffy’s mouth dropped. “Buffy, this is…”

“Spike?”
---------------

TBC...

Disclaimer- All BTVS and ATS characters belong to Joss....

A Whole New World


“Buffy, this is…”

“Spike?” Hank looked at her strangely.

“Excuse me honey?” She continued to stare at him in utter disbelief. ‘No way this could be happening. This can’t be Spike. This is not Spike world. This is normal world.’ Buffy’s brain was trying to process what was happening. ‘Could he have been sent too? No, of course not. Unless he found a way. Bastard. Couldn’t he just leave her alone?’

“Buffy?” Hank was becoming more and more concerned about his daughter. She looked almost as if she’d seen a ghost. “Buffy?” He reached over to touch her shoulder. The young man beside him however was giving Buffy an even stranger look.

“What? Huh?” Buffy seemed to snap out of her trance and looked at her father.

“Are you alright dear? Do you need to lie down?”

“No. No, I’m fine. I just…” She looked at “Spike”. “Who are you?” she asked him.

“I’m James.” He reached out his hand. She stared at it a moment before slowly reaching out her hand to shake his.

“Buffy…” she replied.

“It’s nice to finally meet you.” She pulled her hand back and eyed him curiously. There was something strange about this James character. He looked and sounded like Spike. Only…he didn’t seem to have an accent. He wore blue jeans and a white t-shirt, but his hair was the same bleached color she had known him to have.

“Finally?” She wanted to know what he meant by that.

“Yeah. Well we’ve never officially met. I only just moved here a few weeks before you…” He cut himself off.

“Went crazy?” He smiled at that.

“Well I wouldn’t say that.”

“What would you say then?” She crossed her arms and waited for his response.

“Well I…” He wasn’t exactly sure how to respond. He was afraid to upset her. After all, she had only been out of the Looney bin for a few hours.

“Buffy sweetheart, why don’t you go inside and see if your mother needs any help with dinner.” She replied without taking her eyes off of James.

“Actually I was just going out. I was gonna take a walk. You know…clear my head.” She looked over at her father.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” he asked.

“Dad. I’m 21 years old. I’ll be fine.”

“But you just got home…are you sure you don’t wanna rest?”

“I think I’ve done enough resting the past 6 years.” Hank contemplated this.

“Okay. But try and be back before too long.” She nodded and walked pasted them and onto the sidewalk.

‘What a strange girl,’ James thought to himself as she walked away. ‘Better steer clear of that one.’

“I’m sorry about that,” Hank told him. “She’s still a little…out of it.”

“It’s alright,” James replied.

Hank stared after his daughter. “I just hope she’ll be able to adjust to everything. I mean…it’s been so long since she’s been out in the world, and there are so many things I am afraid I can’t teach her. And her mom’s just so happy to have her back she’s probably willing to let her do anything she wants…”

“I think she’ll be fine. She just needs time,” James said staring at the girls retreating form.

“I just hope we have that much time.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Buffy’s mind was racing.

‘Okay…so Spike is here. But it’s not Spike. It’s James. But it looks like Spike and kind of sounds like Spike. Except for the lack of Englishness. Maybe it’s just in my head, and it’s defiantly not him. But what if it is? What if he’s just pretending to be that guy and pretending not to know me in front of my dad? Maybe….aauuuggghhhh.’

She stomped her feet on the ground. This was soooo unfair. This was supposed to be her normal world. With no vampires. But clearly he wasn’t a vampire. He was out in the sun. But he could have that gem thing. But Angel smashed that. But there could be others. This was so frustrating.

She really needed to talk to someone. Like Willow. But there was no Willow in this world. Unless of course there was. Anything was possible. She wondered briefly if she had any friends. If she had, they probably weren’t her friends anymore. She had, after all, been in a coma-like state for 6 years.

She continued walking, thinking about all of the things she had missed. Prom, graduation…At least she had in this world. She hadn’t even got to have a 21st birthday. At least not a proper one without getting locked in your house with your friends, a couple of demons, and a horny vampire. Stupid vampire.

Buffy pulled her jacket tighter around her as the wind picked up. Stupid world. She continued walking until she reached town. There were a few shops here and there. She vaguely remembered some of them. Buffy stopped walking as she came upon a magic shop. She peered in the window and saw and few people looking around. She resisted temptation to go in, and kept walking, not noticing the young red headed woman who rose up from behind the counter to help a customer.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Where is she?” Joyce was pacing.

“Don’t worry dear; it’s only 5:30.”

“But I told her to be home by 5:00. Oh God. What if something happened to her? What if she was kidnapped?...or worse…” Hank put a hand on his wife’s shoulder.

“She’ll be okay…I’m sure she just…lost track of time.”

As if on cue the front door opened and in walked Buffy. Joyce ran to her daughter and embraced her.

“Honey, I was so worried. Where have you been?”

“Just walking.”

“For two and a half hours?” Hank had walked up behind Joyce who pulled away from her daughter.

“There was a lot to see.” Joyce seemed to accept the answer, but Hank didn’t look too convinced. Joyce led her daughter over to couch.

“Dinner’s ready. I made you your favorite. Chicken and Rice.” “I hope you’ll still like it.”

“Thanks mom.” Buffy put on a fake smile as her mother proceeded to the kitchen to set the table. As soon as she was out of the room Hank spoke up.

“Buffy, you had your mother worried to death. If she tells you to be home at five, be home at five. Understood?”

“I’m not a child dad,” Buffy said standing up.

“Well you are still my baby, Buffy. And we just got you back. We don’t want to lose you again.”

“You’re not gonna lose me.”

“I know, it’s just…we worry is all.”

“You don’t have to. I can take care of myself.” He smiled. That was the old Buffy he knew and loved.

“I know you can dear.” At that particular moment the door bell rang.

“Who’s here?” Buffy asked.

“Oh. I hope you don’t mind. Your mother and I thought it would be nice to invite the Johansson’s over for dinner,” Hank replied walking over to the door. Buffy wondered who the Johansson’s were. She also wondered if she would recognize them as being from her other “made-up” world.

“Hey Frank, Barbra,” Hank greeted. He and Frank shook hands as he motioned them inside. Joyce entered the room and gave a similar greeting as Hank had.

“Oh where’s Julie?” Joyce asked Barbra.

“Oh out gallivanting around with that boyfriend of hers I’d suspect.” They both smiled. “I swear to goodness that girl drives me crazy. I’m just glad she’s found her a decent man with a good job.”

“Yes. He was quite the catch wasn’t he?” The two women continued their gossip, but Buffy tuned them out, ceasing to care. The two men on the other hand had taken a seat on the couch and were discussing sports or something else exceedingly boring. Buffy wandered into the kitchen. She peered at the dinner. It looked pretty good, but she just didn’t seem to be hungry.

She walked out onto the back porch and leaned against the porch post. Her back yard was similar to the Sunnydale one. She closed her eyes and let the cool air rush over her face.

“Hello pet.” Buffy’s eyes popped open. In front of her stood Spike, decked out in his black shirt, shoes, and coat.

“What are you doing here?” He smirked as he walked closer.

“Just standing about. You?”

“How did you get here? You’re not supposed to be here.” He came to stand beside her, and put his hand to her head.

“This is how.” She looked confused.

“I don’t understand.”

“You will.”

“Buffy.”

Buffy opened her eyes. The back yard was empty. She turned around to see her mom standing in the door way.

“Yeah?”

“Dinner time.”

Dinner and a Movie


Buffy sat down at the table and glanced at the two strangers. They looked familiar, although she was quite certain that she had never seen either one of them before.

“So Buffy, now that your all better, what are your plans?” Mr. Johansson asked.

“”I…I’m not sure. I haven’t really thought about it.” She stared down at her plate.

“Well can I just say that CSU is a great school. That’s where our Julie goes. She really enjoys it.”

“He’s right dear” Hank told her, “you really should be thinking about your future.” Buffy cast a look at her dad before picking up her fork and poking at her food.

Mr. Johansson took a bite of his chicken. “Mrs. Summers, this is wonderful.”

“Oh thank you. It’s really nothing though. It is so easy to make.”

“You may have to give me the recipe sometime then,” Mrs. Johansson said, “because we all know how wonderful a cook I am.” Everyone laughed, except for Buffy.

“I really wish Julie could have made it this evening. I was hoping she could introduce Buffy to some of her friends.” Joyce looked at her daughter who seemed to be tuning out everyone.

“Oh I’m sure she would be glad to do that. She has some really wonderful friends” Barbra said.

“Yes. Doesn’t that James boy live next door?” Frank asked. Buffy looked up at that.

“Oh yeah. He is a really nice young man. He helped me move Buffy’s things into the house this afternoon” Hank replied.

“That’s nice. You know it’s really sad how few kind people there are in the world these days” Barbra added. Everyone nodded. Buffy could have laughed. Spike nice? But of course this wasn’t Spike now was it? No. This was James, the wonderful, kind, soon to be college student who everyone just seemed to love.

“Buffy? Honey are you okay?” Joyce asked her spaced out daughter. Her voice contained a hint of panic. Buffy looked up at her mom and then at everyone else at the table who all seemed to be looking at her.

“Yeah. I’m just…a little tired.” Joyce didn’t look convinced.

“Are you sure that’s all? You haven’t even touched your dinner.” She looked at her plate.

“I’m just not very hungry.”

“Honey…” Hank began.

“I’m fine…really. I just…” she put her fork down and looked at her father and mother. “Can I please be excused?”

“Of course dear.” Buffy got up from the table and started to leave. Joyce rose to her feet.

“Do you want me to walk with you?”

“No. I’ll be okay. I just need some sleep. It’s been a long day.” She nodded uncertainly.

Buffy turned to the Johansson’s. “It was nice to meet you.”

“You too dear.” She turned and proceeded to walk up the stairs. When she reached her bedroom she shut the door and plopped down on the bed. It had been a long day. A long and confusing day. So many things had happened and she wasn’t quite sure what this all meant. She kicked off her shoes and closed her eyes. Within minutes, she was asleep.
___________________________

“I don’t think this is such a good idea.”

“Sure it is. Now shh. They’re going to hear you.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her behind him around the house.

“What if we get caught?” He stopped and turned to face her.

“So what if we do? What are they gonna do about it?”

“Well…ground me for one thing.” He laughed.

“That is so not funny. Then I definitely won’t be able to see you.” He leaned in and kissed her.

“That’s never gonna happen Buffy. Now come on.” He turned and ran towards his car.

“But Angel…wait.” She ran after him.
----------------------------------------

Her eyes opened as the sun began peeking in through her window. Her hands went to cover them as she sat up in bed. Her latest dream was still on her mind. She had had dreams about her and Angel before, but nothing like this. It had seemed more like a memory than a dream. But it couldn’t have been a memory. Before her coma she had never even met Angel. Had she?

The doctors had told her that all of the people that were in her “fantasy” world were people whom she had seen sometime in her life; whether it be on TV, magazines, or just on the street somewhere. Spike…James, obviously fit into that last category. Though as hard as she tried she could not remember ever seeing him, and he wasn’t exactly the kind of person one could forget. She didn’t even really recall ever having new neighbors move into the house beside hers in the time she remembered living in LA. Though all of her memories (real and fake) were mixing together and she was beginning to have a hard time telling them apart.

Buffy stood up from her bed and began moving towards the bathroom. After a good shower she would go out and check out more of the town. Maybe the mall. Shopping can do any girl good.
---------------------------------------

“Mom” Buffy called as she walked down the stairs.

“Yes dear?” came a reply from the kitchen.

“I’m going out. I’ll be back in a few hours.” Joyce appeared in the doorway.

“Where are you going?”

“Just you know…around. I thought I might check out the mall. Or the Home Depot, like you said. I don’t think I can live much longer with those unicorns. They’re already giving me nightmares.” Joyce smiled, happy to see some humor in her daughter.

“Alright well, do you need any money?” Money. Yes that would be helpful in ones task to redo ones room.

“Uhh…yeah. I guess I do don’t I?” Joyce nodded and headed over to her desk to retrieve her purse.

“Do you think fifty will be enough?” Before Buffy had a chance to answer, “No, probably not. Here, I’ll just give you my card. Just don’t go crazy alright?” she said handing the card to her.

“Thanks mom.” Buffy gave her mother a quick smile before heading towards the door. “And don’t worry, I won’t spend more than a few hundred.” She didn’t even have to turn around to know the look her mother was giving her.
----------------------------------------

“Oooo, that’s…the ugliest thing I think I have ever seen in my life.” Buffy held up the baby poop green jeans with white dusty marks on the butt. “Unless you’re going for the ‘I just shit my pants and sniff chalk look’.” She smiled to herself and put the jeans back on the rack.

One thing about bargain hunting, the clothes were never all that fabulous. But after spending close to two-hundred dollars on paint, and appropriate room accessories, she wanted to be cautious about how much she spent on clothes. Didn’t want to give dear ol’ mom a heart attack when she got her next credit card bill. She continued searching through the clearance racks for twenty minutes before finding a little black dress that would be nice for an evening out.

Her parents had informed her that they would be throwing her a welcome home party tomorrow night, and whereas she was certain she wouldn’t recognize anyone who would be there, she nonetheless wanted to look cute.

She hadn’t been crazy about the idea at first, telling them that it was not necessary, but after they talked her ears off about how they were just trying to help her get readjusted, she had agreed.

Buffy had also found a couple of shirts and a pair of pants that were on sale and couldn’t resist buying them. Not to mention the fact that she had a very limited number of clothes that she could and would still wear. Fashion had changed in the past six years. She gathered her things and made her way to the checkout.

There was only one cashier, but only two other people in line in front of her, which was good for a Saturday. She stood there shuffling her feet trying to keep herself entertained while waiting. She began looking around at the racks of clearance movies seeing if anything struck her fancy. As per usual there were a million copies of the same movies over and over. Some with titles that she didn’t recognize. Buffy noticed the lady in front of her had stepped up, and she was about to do the same when a VHS near the bottom of the rack caught her eye. She bent down to get a better look at it.

There were two people on the side, a girl and a boy. She looked at the title and then shook her head thinking she must have read it wrong. She inched a little closer and her breath caught in her throat. She hadn’t read it wrong. Right there on the white box in bright pink letters was the title:

Buffy, the Vampire Slayer.

Party Like Its 2002

“And you’re sure she hasn’t called?” Joyce asked her husband for the fiftieth time.

“Yes dear, I’m sure.” Hank briefly looked up at his wife who was currently pacing back and forth across the living room.

“And you’re not worried?”

“No dear.”

Joyce plopped down on the couch. “I don’t know why I’m acting like this. I mean it’s not like she’s incapable of taking care of herself. And it’s only 8.” She sighed. It was a mother’s job to worry about her daughter. Even if said daughter happened to be of the legal drinking age. This thought brought other, less pleasant ones to mind. “Oh God. What if she’s passed out somewhere and she needs us?”

“What if she got kidnapped by the Italian mafia and they’re holding her hostage in their warehouse until the government pays them 10 million dollars?” Joyce gave her husband a look that said she found no humor in his statement. Hank on the other hand was smiling to himself. He looked up at his wife and then reached over and patted her on the knee.

“I’m kidding. Look, you know she’s fine.” She didn’t look convinced.

“She should have been back by now.”

“She’s 21 years old dear. You should be happy that she comes back at all.”

“Hank!” Before he had a chance to defend himself the front door opened.

Buffy looked over at her parents, one of which looked irritated and the other who looked like he’d got caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

“Hey” she offered. Joyce rose from the couch and moved to help her daughter with her bags.

“Hello honey. Are you alright?”

“Uhh…yeah I guess. Just tired.” To be honest she wasn’t so good. That movie had gotten her all shaken up, and despite her brain telling her it was a bad idea she had bought it. She was determined to find out what all of her dreams and apparent hallucinations meant, and she was convinced the movie would provide the answers that she needed.

“You sure?”

“Yes mom. I’m sure. I’m okay. Really. You don’t have to worry about me.” Her mother nodded knowing that she had a point. She was overreacting considering that it was barely even dark outside.

As Buffy started up the stairs she couldn’t help but think that her mom in imaginary world had been a lot less protective of her than this one seemed to be. Although other world Buffy had never been in a coma, she had been a slayer. One would think that this would cause a mother to be more concerned.

After she got all of her bags into her room and showed her mom everything, well almost everything, that she had bought, she went to the bathroom and took a shower. The water felt good on her sore muscles. She was surprised at how tired her body was after a simple day of walking around town. And those shopping bags had been heavier than she had anticipated. Having the strength of a normal girl was tough. She had gotten so used to being strong. But of course she really hadn’t, because that wasn’t real.

She was becoming more and more convinced that the doctor had been right. Maybe she had unknowingly saw the movie somewhere before and it had stuck with her in the back of her mind. That would make sense. And maybe all of the people that she had imagined, she had seen sometime or another in her life. Maybe her subconscious had a photographic memory.

She really had to watch that movie. And that was the plan she had decided while showering. She would watch it tonight after her parents went to sleep. She couldn’t risk them walking in and seeing her watching it. They would send her right back to the looney bin.

She turned the water off and grabbed her towel. After wrapping up in it she stepped out of the bathroom and into the hall. The coolness of the air made her shiver. Buffy made her way to her room and got dressed. It was getting close to nine and she was becoming a little hungry. She hadn’t eaten anything since lunch, and even then she had only eaten one slice of pizza. Her stomach growled loudly and she knew that she couldn’t put off eating much longer. She decided that Chinese sounded really good, and if she remembered correctly, the restaurant nearest to their house delivered.

What could be better than dinner and a movie?

--------------------------------------

As the credits of the movie rolled Buffy’s mind was all over the place. The girl in the movie had been similar to “dream world Buffy” in the respect that she was a slayer with weird dreams and an interesting taste in men. And what a coincidence that said love interest happened to carry the name Pike. That would explain the whole Spike thing. She just saw James and connected that with Pike from the movie and added an S for some reason. And maybe she could kinda link Riley with that Jeffrey guy, but what about Angel?

Thinking of him brought her mind back to her dream. What the hell did that mean? And romance aside, what about Willow and Xander? Buffy’s friends in the movie had been major bitches. Not to mention Giles and Merrick don’t exactly sound the same. And Dawn, how did she fit in? She was still so confused.

Buffy closed her eyes and lay back on her bed. Why did this all have to be so complicated? She could only hope that things would get simpler as time went on. She would figure everything out, eventually. She hoped.

Right now though, she had other things to worry about. Like that party that was to be thrown in her honor. She could only hope there would be no clowns or magic tricks. The way her mom was acting, anything was possible. She was 21 years old after all. She should have been out with friends, drinking and having a good time instead of lying on her bed thinking about a world that wasn’t even real. Not that her parents would let her go anywhere. Buffy felt like she was 16 again, having her mom pacing the floors and checking in on her every two seconds. She would really have to look into getting her own place. Though, in order to do that, one needs money, and to have money, one would need a job, and having a job brought back bad memories of fast food and people burgers. Buffy cringed. Even if she hadn’t really worked in fast food, she still remembered doing so, and that was enough to keep her away from that world.

She wondered who exactly her parents had invited to this thing. It wasn’t like she had any friends, and the ones that she had had probably wouldn’t be too up for hanging out anymore. And how awkward would that be? ‘Hey Buffy. Long time no see. How you been? In a coma? Great.’ She really needed to look into making some friends. She briefly considered talking to James. He was after all the only person relatively close to her age that she had met, and he could probably introduce her to some other people. She quickly dismissed the idea. She didn’t need any help. She was perfectly capable of making friends on her own. And that was exactly what she was going to do.

-----------------------------------

“Buffy! It’s almost six. Everyone’s going to be here soon. Are you almost ready?”

“Yeah mom!” came a reply from upstairs.

Buffy nearly fell over as she hopped on one foot while trying to put a shoe on the other. She soon regained her balance and looked at herself in the mirror and smiled. She had successfully gotten both of her heels on without sitting down. She looked herself up and down, satisfied with what she had managed to put together. Her knew black dress fell just above her knees, and was cut low enough to show off some cleavage, but high enough to be considered tasteful. Luckily her mom had some black heels that didn’t look like old lady shoes. She had her hair slightly curled, and it fell around her shoulders. (A/N: we’re pretending that her hair isn’t short cause I liked it better long) Looking at her now, one would have never guessed that she had been in a coma for six years. She had apparently managed to keep her shape.

Buffy heard the door bell ring and knew that some of the guests had arrived. She gave herself one final look over before heading downstairs.

-------------------------

“Mrs. Johansson” Joyce greeted as the woman entered the house.

“Hello Joyce.” Joyce looked out the door and when she didn’t see anyone else outside, she closed the door.

“Where’s Frank?”

“Oh he spotted Hank out back and absolutely had to find out what he was doing.” Joyce nodded and the two women smiled.

“And what about that daughter of yours? Is she going to be able to make it?”

“Yes. She’s on her way now. She went with Juliet Thompson down to visit her mother.”

“That poor girl. I’m surprised she hasn’t become as insane as that woman, having to take care of her all those years.”

“At least they’ve got her in a good place now.” Joyce nodded.

“It’s just a shame that they couldn’t have done it sooner. Juliet lost most of her childhood to her mother’s disease.”

“It’s a good thing she had…Buffy.” Barbra looked slightly confused for a second before she noticed the girl at the bottom of the stairs.

“Hello Buffy. You look wonderful.”

“Thank you.”

“Honey you look beautiful.” Joyce looked admiringly at her daughter.

“Thanks mom.”

“Is that the dress you bought?” Buffy nodded. “It’s lovely.” She smiled at the two women. She had almost forgotten how it felt to have her mom reassuring her that she was beautiful. It was nice.

The doorbell rang and Joyce went to answer it.

-----------------------

Within the hour approximately 30 more people arrived; none of which Buffy recognized. With the exception of James, who had shown up with his parents. And other than saying hello to them, she had been doing her best to avoid James at all costs. Maybe he wasn’t the vampire that she knew, but he was enough like him to give her the creeps.

It was getting close to eight now, and Buffy had decided to duck outside to get some air. Having to tell people that she was fine over and over was exhausting. She leaned against the porch rail and watched as cars passed by.

“Nice night.” She jumped, slightly startled. James came to stand beside her, and she stood up straight. “You alright?”

“Yeah. You just scared me a little.” He smiled.

“Sorry.”

“No big.” She crossed her arms and looked at him out of the corner of her eye. It looked as if her ‘avoid James’ plan had failed.

“So, shouldn’t you be mingling right about now?” He had turned to face her leaning his back against the porch post behind him.

“I think I’ve had about all of the mingling I can take for one lifetime.”

“I know what you mean. Not even my party and I’ve had to explain my future plans to everyone in the room. But apparently there’s still hope for young people.” Buffy smiled despite the fact she felt really weird talking to him. His lack of accent was rather disturbing. She thought briefly about asking him if he’d ever been to England but thought better of it. No need to make more people think she was insane. It was also strange to hear him refer to himself as young. James was only a year or two older than her. Though technically Spike had been about that age. He was still young when he had died.

They stood in silence, neither really knowing what else to say. Luckily a car in the driveway caught their attention. James seemed to perk up.

“Who’s that?” Buffy asked as she saw two people get out of the car.

“Hold on a sec.” He started down the stairs to meet them. The question of did he know them was dismissed when she saw him kiss one of them. She pushed back an annoying feeling and waited for them. The other person, a girl, arrived at the porch first. Soon after James returned with another girl in tow.

She shouldn’t have been shocked, but that didn’t stop her eyes from going wide as she recognized two faces she had never wanted to see again.

----------------------------------------

Unlikely Friends

“Buffy, this is my girlfriend Juliet and her best friend Julie. Girls, this is Buffy.”

“Hello.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

Buffy managed a “you too” and put on a fake smile. Her brain was going crazy once again. ‘Julie and Juliet? Try Darla and Dru.’ Buffy could not believe it. How the hell had every vampire she had chosen this world to escape, somehow ended up here too? Except they weren’t vampires now were they? They both looked slightly tanner, although it was hard to tell in only the dim light of her porch. And similar to James, Juliet seemed to be American. And his girlfriend. That’s what he had said. How could they still be dating? In the other world they were long since over. Not that it mattered. Why should she care if they were together or not? She shouldn’t. And didn’t. Absolutely didn’t.

“So Buffy, are you coming to the club tomorrow night?” Julie asked.

“Whahuh…?” Buffy snapped out of her daze.

“The club?” Buffy still didn’t fully understand what she was saying and apparently her face showed this. “Tomorrow” Julie tried again. “James was supposed to invite you.” She cast a look at him. He made one of those ‘oh my bad’ faces. “Which apparently he didn’t.”

“It’s like you women expect me to do everything.” Juliet smacked him playfully on the arm. The smile they shared did not go unnoticed by Buffy.

“Anyway…some of us are going to the club tomorrow night if you want to come with.” Buffy’s eyes returned to Julie.

“Oh well I…I don’t know. I don’t want to intrude.”

“You won’t.”

“Well…”

“C’mon. It’ll be fun” Juliet said.

Buffy didn’t know what she should do. She wasn’t really sure that she wanted to hang out with these people. And why were they being oh-so-friendly? She had only just met them like 10 seconds ago. On the other hand she didn’t want to seem like a jerk by refusing to be social. But being social with a bunch of vampires? Although as she had just concluded, they were not vampires. They were just human beings who were seemingly trying to be nice and invite her to go somewhere with them. Weird? Definitely. For all she knew her mom had put them up to this. That would make more sense than them just deciding on their own that she would be a fun person to hang out with. Who would want to hang out with a girl that had just been released from a mental hospital?

No one in their right mind, that’s for sure. And yet something compelled her to agree. Maybe it was the fact that she was still curious about this new world. Or maybe she was desperate for friends.

“Okay.” Both girls smiled at her.

“You won’t regret it” Julie said.

‘I sure hope not’ Buffy thought.

“So shall we go inside or are we planning on staying out here all night long?” Juliet asked.

“Oh yeah,” Buffy said, “I was just getting some air.”

“You need it hanging out in there too long” James added. Buffy opened the door and all four of them went into the house. Julie was immediately greeted by her mother.

“Sweetheart” she said hugging her, “I’m so glad you made it. I was starting to think you two wouldn’t make it back in time.”

“Traffic was pretty bad.” The woman nodded.

“I figured that it would be.

“Dear. Did you invite Buffy to come along with you to that club?” she asked.

“Yes mom.” Apparently the mothers did have something to do with the invite. Joyce chimed in then.

“Are you going to go sweetheart?” Buffy looked at her moms hopeful expression.

“Yeah.” She put on a smile and Joyce seemed pleased by the whole situation. She was happy that her daughter was making friends. She had been so worried that she wouldn’t be able to readjust. It had been so long since she had really communicated with anybody.

“That’s great. I’m sure the five of you will have a great time.” Julie nodded at her mother’s statement.

At hearing that Buffy started to regret her decision. Five? That meant that Julie was probably bringing her boyfriend along, which meant that she would end up being the fifth wheel. Great. Her mind then began to wonder about this boyfriend. She suddenly felt sick.

If James was with Juliet, like Spike had been with Dru, then that probably meant that Julie was with…No, she couldn’t think about that. But no matter how hard she tried to push it to the back of her mind it kept resurfacing. Angel. Only it wouldn’t be Angel. It would be…whoever real world Angel was. Her mom had mentioned his name, but she couldn’t remember it now. Not that it mattered because clearly their names had nothing to do with the names they had had in demon world. True she didn’t know if Darla and Drusilla were their real names, but she knew Spike’s real name had been William. And last time she checked James was not short for William.

She also remembered her mom saying how great a man he was and that he had a good job. That sounded like Angel. But then again everyone else that she had met had been nothing like her dream world versions of themselves. Her thoughts were interrupted when an old woman that she was sure she had never seen before came up to her and started talking. Her mom joined in on the conversation and introduced Buffy to the woman, who happened to be her old boss, Mrs. Greenway.

“And Hazel’s granddaughter is about your age too. You’ll have to meet her some time. She’s the sweetest girl.” Buffy smiled and nodded an uhuh though truly she wasn’t so sure that she wanted to meet anymore of the people her age that her mom knew.

After exchanging a few more words with Mrs. Greenway Buffy began ‘mingling’ with anyone and everyone.

The rest of the night seemed to pass slowly. Eventually people began to leave and by midnight everyone had gone except for Julie and her mother. James opted to take Juliet home. Buffy was rather glad when they left. She was getting nauseous watching them groping each other. Okay, so they weren’t exactly groping. More like sitting beside each other on the couch laughing and smiling. She didn’t know which was worse. Not that she cared.

Currently the two older women were sitting on the couch engaged in conversation. Buffy was in the kitchen washing dishes.

“Hey Buffy.” The ex-slayer turned her head to see Julie standing in the doorway. “Need some help?” Buffy didn’t know what to say. It was weird, to say the least. But why not give the girl a chance?

“Sure.” Julie came over and stood beside her. She reached for the dish towel and began to dry the clean dishes as Buffy washed them.

“You know, you didn’t have to invite me to go with you guys. I know my mom put you up to it.”

“I wanted to.” Buffy gave her a look out of the corner of her eye. “Okay. So my mother may have suggested it, but I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t think I would like you.”

“Well thanks. But I think I need to have a chat with my mom and let her know that I’m a big girl now and don’t need her help to make friends.” Julie laughed.

“She just worries about you. It’s a mom thing.”

“Yeah I guess.” They were both silent a moment, concentrating on the task at hand.

“So…Buffy…” Julie said after a while, “I know we haven’t known each other that long but…can I ask you a question?” Buffy took a breath. She knew this was going to happen. She was going to ask about the hospital. Who wouldn’t? I mean it wasn’t just something that you could ignore. ‘Hey I made this new friend, she’s really great, she’s good at washing dishes and oh yeah she was in a mental institution for 6 years but she doesn’t like to talk about it.’

“Yeah?” she asked hesitantly.

“I already talked to Juliet about it, but I wanted to get a second opinion.” Buffy was confused now. They had been talking about her?

“Okay.” She prepared herself for the worst.

“Well the other day I was walking to class when I heard this girl talking about a movie. Apparently this new hot shot director is looking for actors for his next big film. She said they were holding auditions in a few weeks, and I was thinking about going. You know, to try out for the part.” Buffy was relieved.

“Okay?”

“But my mom would totally freak out if she found out. She told me acting was a stupid career that hardly ever works out. She wants me to be a doctor.” Buffy almost laughed at the thought of her as a doctor. It was ironic in a way.

“So? I mean you should be able to do what you want to do. Not what she wants you to do.” Julie put down the dishrag and sighed.

“I know, but it’s so hard. I mean I don’t want her to be disappointed in me.”

“I’m sure she won’t be. Not if you do your best.” She laughed.

“Now you’re starting to sound like a mother.” Buffy got a mock-horrified look on her face.

“Don’t say that.” They both laughed.

“I just hope I don’t act like them.”

“Me too. But you know, all kidding aside, I think you should do it. Try out I mean.”

“Thanks. I was hoping you would say that.” They smiled and resumed their dish washing. Buffy glanced over at her. It was weird that they were talking, and getting along. She wondered briefly if she could have liked Darla. Had she had not been evil and killed Jesse of course.

As strange as it was though, it seemed that Buffy had made a friend. An unlikely friend, but a friend none the less.

------------------------------------

Blind Dates and Future Plans

Buffy grumbled as she tried to fasten the back of her dress. The task was all but impossible. She stomped her foot for the 10th time, and let out a small shriek of annoyance. Julie was supposed to be picking her up in less than 15 minutes and she still had to do her hair.

She had been surprised to find Julie to be a likeable person. After they had finished up the dishes they had sat and talked for another hour or so about anything and everything. Buffy had admitted that she was worried about being able to fit back into the world. The other girl had explained that even though the world might seem like a scary place from time to time you had to face it head on. She had then gotten a strange look on her face but shook it off and changed the subject. Buffy sensed that there was something she wasn’t saying, but didn’t want to seem rude and pushy by asking. So they continued conversation until Mrs. Johansson came into the kitchen and told Julie they needed to let the Summers get some sleep. She had agreed and soon Buffy and her mom were in bed.

The next day she had gotten up early and decided to take a morning jog. Even though she didn’t have to kill demons anymore didn’t mean she shouldn’t stay in shape. After all she was single, and as great as that was, she wasn’t looking to end up an old woman with cats. She had jogged through the town and some local neighborhoods. She arrived back home around ten and found her mom had made breakfast for her. After eating she had showered and then decided to see what was on TV. She had considered watching the movie again but then decided against it because it would just mess with her head and the last thing she needed was to have her head messed with. So she’d settled for a made for TV movie on TBS. She’d fallen asleep on the couch about half way into it and had the strangest dream about fishing with Freddie Prinze Jr. Not long after she woke up her mom had asked for her help bringing some boxes in from the garage. After lunch she decided the rest of the afternoon would be spent getting her room ready for its makeover. By dinner time she had everything boxed up that she didn’t want anymore, like several of her old outfits. She’d taken a second shower and after blow-drying her hair she’d started to get dressed.

And that’s where she was now. Preparing for a night out on the town with her new found friends. The thought of these people being her friends still made her a bit uneasy. As much as she tried to convince herself that they were just normal people that she had seen sometime before falling into her coma like state that she had set as figures in her dream world, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was still not right about all of this. But the only way she was going to find out for sure what was going on was to put on a smile and hang out with them. Which is exactly what she was going to do. If she could get her dress on.

Joyce, after hearing her daughter’s frustrated screams and stomps, knocked on her door.

“Honey are you alright in there?”

“Could use a little help actually.” Joyce entered the room to see her daughter struggling to fasten her dress. She smiled and walked over to assist her.

“Thanks.”

“Anytime.” As Joyce fastened the dress Buffy watched her in the mirror. One major thing that this world had over her make believe world was her mom. That had been one of the main reasons she had decided to choose this. “So where are you kids headed off to tonight?”

“I’m not really sure. Some club in the area. Julie didn’t mention the name or anything.”

“I am so glad you’re making friends sweetheart. And I know you don’t like it when I say that but it’s true. Because no matter how big you get, you’re still my little Buffy.” Buffy turned and hugged her mother.

“I love you mom.”

“I love you too honey.” The two stayed like that for a moment before breaking apart. Joyce left the room and Buffy went to work on her hair. By the time a car horn honked out front she was ready.

She found Julie alone in the car waiting on her.

“Hey Buffy.”

“Hey.”

“You look hott girl.” Buffy looked down at her dress.

“Thanks. I try,” she said smiling. “So where is everyone? I thought there would be lots of people coming.”

“There are. They’re meeting us there. James and Jules wanted some alone time first, if you get my drift.” Unfortunately Buffy did get her drift and it made her feel sick. How could he sleep with her? ‘Well,’ she told herself, ‘they are dating.’ Still the thought of Spike with another woman made her angry, and she hated that. ‘Though this wasn’t Spike now was it?’ she asked herself for the millionth time. Even so, it was not something that she wanted to be thinking about.

“And Chris had to finish up something at work.”

“Who’s Chris?” Buffy asked curiously.

“My boyfriend.”

“Oh.” Again her mind returned to Angel. Would it be him? She couldn’t be sure. Not until she saw him. She really really hoped that it wasn’t. That would make everything very awkward. Not to mention she didn’t think she could stand seeing him with Julie, much like she couldn’t stand seeing Juliet with James. She mentally cursed herself again for thinking that. She didn’t care. Absolutely didn’t.

“And I think he’s bringing a friend.”

“A friend huh?” Buffy’s eyebrows rose in question. “You didn’t.” Julie couldn’t help but smile.

“I did.”

“Julie!”

“Well I know you said that you were afraid that you wouldn’t be able to adjust, so I thought I would help you out.” Buffy didn’t look too happy about this. She wasn’t so sure she was ready for dating this soon. She had only been out of the hospital for a little over a week. “And if you don’t like him then you don’t have to see him again. He’s not a good friend or anything. He works with Chris.”

“What do they do?” Buffy asked.

“They work for Chris’s dad at his law firm, Wolfram and Hart.” The name sounded vaguely familiar to Buffy, but she couldn’t think of where she had heard it before.

“He’s a lawyer?”

“No. Not yet anyway. He’s going to law school. Right now he’s just helping his dad, doing whatever needs to be done.” Buffy nodded. “I know it’s not the most promising of careers, but it’s what he wants to do.”

“And people should be able to do what they want,” Buffy said, “like being a star for instance.” Julie smiled at that.

“Yeah. We’ll see how that goes. But hey, if I do get a job opportunity I’m sure that Chris could find work in LA. If we get married that is.”

“Do you think you’re going to?”

“I don’t know. I mean we love each other but…there are a lot of things that could…prevent that from happening.” Buffy wondered what those things were, but figured that if Julie wanted her to know she would tell her. Instead she just nodded.

“Well I don’t have a clue what I want to do. I don’t even have a high school diploma.”

“You’ll figure it out.”

“I hope so. Mom’s been on my case since I got back about going and getting my GED. It’s almost like she’s trying to get me back into this world as soon as possible. And I just don’t know if I’m ready for that. I mean I want to go to school and everything, but I’ve only been home a week and I’m still trying to get settled. I just don’t think she can stand seeing me not being like everyone else. I mean I’ve been that way for six years.”

“Have you talked to her about it?”

“No. I don’t know what to say. I don’t want to hurt her feelings or anything.”

“She’ll come around.”

“Yeah. I think she’s still in the mindset of raising a sixteen year old. I don’t think she’s quite realized I’m 22.”

“Well she did miss out on most of your teenage years.”

“I guess. I just wish that she would stop trying to force me to good to school, and make friends…not that you guys aren’t great, but I think I could have done just fine on my own.”

“But then you might not have met us and that would be a shame.” Buffy laughed lightly.

“Well…I don’t know. Maybe I’ll figure it out.”

“You will.”

-----------------------------------

When they got to the club Buffy was surprised to see that the name of the club was Freddie’s. The name sounded more like a name for a bar rather than a club. A part of her had expected it to be The Bronze. After all it seemed that everything else in her dream world had been things she had seen in this world.

They went in the club, which was packed, and Julie began searching for her friends. She spotted James first, though he was a bit hard to miss with that hair of his. They made there way over to where he a Juliet were seated at a table.

“Hey guys.”

“Hey Julie, Buffy,” Juliet said. Buffy found herself examining the girl to see if she looked like she had recently had relations of the overly friendly kind. She didn’t, but of course she would have fixed herself before getting here.

“So where’s Chris?”

“I don’t know. He’s supposed to be meeting us here around now.” Julie looked around the club to see if he was there anywhere. Buffy sat down at the table next to James.

“So what do you think?” he asked her.

“It’s…nice.”

“I thought so too. I remember the first time Julie dragged me here. I was totally against it. I just knew it was going to be full of creepy old men and sixteen year old hoochies.” Buffy laughed. He leaned in closer then and practically whispered in her ear, “but I was most certainly wrong.” She felt herself involuntarily shiver. She looked at him curiously, not really knowing what he meant by that. But he wouldn’t be flirting now would he? No of course not. Not with his precious girlfriend sitting right next to him. Buffy then saw Julie waving to someone, and saw as two men made their way over to the table. The first she did not recognize.

“Buffy I would like you to meet my boyfriend Chris.” He reached out and shook her hand. She was instantly relieved. So apparently Angel wasn’t her boyfriend. Instead it was this guy, whom she had never seen before in her life.

“Nice to meet you.”

“You too.”

“And this…” Julie reached behind her boyfriend and pulled the other man around him. “…is Nick.”

Buffy had to keep from letting her jaw drop. Standing before her was someone she did recognize, and the last person she had expected to see.

Jealousy’s a Bitch

“Hi,” he said reaching for her hand as Chris had. Buffy swallowed and shook his hand.

“Hey.” ‘Nick’ smiled at her. She smiled back even though inside she was freaking out. This was starting to be a regular thing; seeing people from her dream world. First James, Julie, and Juliet. And now him.

“Why don’t we all sit down and talk,” Julie suggested. She took a seat beside Juliet, closely followed by Chris and Nick, who happened to end up sitting beside her. How convenient.

“So you guys get all your work done?” Juliet asked them.

“Yes we did,” Chris replied. “And now we have a whole weekend off to do whatever our hearts desire.” He leaned over and kissed his girlfriend.

“What have you girls been up to?”

“Not much. Had class, but that’s about it.” He nodded.

“What about you Buffy?”

“Nothing really. Just hanging around the house, watching TV.”

“Sounds exciting,” Chris said.

“Oh yeah.”

“So I don’t know about you guys, but I could really use a drink.”

“I’m right there with you one that one,” James said.

“Well why don’t you boys go and get all us something?” Juliet said sweetly.

“I guess that could be arranged.” They took drink orders and headed off to the bar.

“You just gotta love men,” Julie said.

“Yeah we’re awesome.” All three girls laughed.

“So Nick, anything interesting going on in your life?”

“Not so much. I mean work mostly. I recently got promoted.”

“That’s great,” Julie said looking at Buffy, who returned a look with raised eyebrows. Seems he had really made something of himself. And working in a law office was quite different than what she had known his job to be. She wondered if he was as handy here as Sunnydale “Nick” had been.

Xander. One of her best friends. And now she was on a pseudo blind date with him. She had most certainly not expected it to be him. Angel maybe, but not Xander. He looked pretty much the same, only more put together. Which was understandable since he seemed to work in the business world. She wondered why he didn’t have a girlfriend.

Juliet and Julie began carrying on their own conversation, which just left Buffy and Nick with nothing to talk about.

“So, this is a nice place,” Nick said looking around.

“Yeah it’s great.” Buffy looked down at her hands. What on earth was she supposed to say to him? Sure they had been friends in her “other world” as she had started calling it, but here they had never even met. Before either of them had a chance to say much of anything Chris and James returned.

“Here we go ladies…and Nick,” Chris said as he and James placed drinks in front of everyone.

“Thanks. Hey how about we dance?” Julie said grabbing Chris’s hand and pulling him towards the dance floor.

“But the drinks…”

“…will be here when we get back.” He sighed and let himself be dragged away.

“What about you? Wanna dance?” James made a face at his girlfriend.

“Must we?” She made a pouty face. “Okay fine.” He got up and started following her onto the dance floor. Buffy noticed him glance back at her, but then quickly turned back around. She made a face at them.

Of course they would leave her here alone with Nick. They were trying to set them up after all.

He looked at her a bit nervously.

“So…”

“So…”

“Would you umm…like to dance?” She was afraid he was going to ask that.

“Sure.” No need to be rude, even if this was a bit weird. He held out his hand and she grabbed it following him then out on the floor with the others. She looked at Julie who seemed to be proud of herself. Juliet too was smiling, but James was giving her another look. One that she wasn’t quite sure of. She noticed how close he and Juliet were dancing. Why, why did she notice? Why did she care? Oh right…she didn’t. At least, that’s what she kept telling herself.

Nick put his hands on her waist and she put her on his shoulders. She didn’t recognize the song that was playing, but discovered that it didn’t really matter when Nick started talking.

“I want you to know that I had nothing to do with this. Chris asked me if I wanted to hang out with him and some of his friends tonight. I didn’t realize until about ten minutes into the evening that I was being set up.” Buffy laughed.

“Yeah tell me about it. Julie informed me on the way here that Chris was bringing a friend from work that I may find interesting. I was about ready to kill her.” He smiled.

“So do you?”

“Do I what?”

“Find me interesting.”

“I don’t know. I haven’t decided yet.” They continued talking for the rest of the song, and into another one. Seems Nick was more like Xander than any of the others had been like their “other” selves. She only hoped that he didn’t get the wrong idea. He was nice and all, but she just didn’t think she would ever be able to date someone, who had (in a way) been her best friend for six years.

She looked back over at James and Juliet. They looked like they were about ready to go somewhere a bit more private. But it didn’t matter. They could do whatever they wanted. But did they have to be acting so…into each other? Buffy mentally scolded herself. ‘Stop acting jealous.’ She wasn’t of course. She just didn’t think he should like anyone else. Was that so much to ask?

-----------------------------

James was having issues. Here he was, dancing with his girlfriend, and thinking about someone else. Who does that?

Ever since Buffy had arrived he couldn’t stop thinking about her. He found himself noticing how good she looked. What was that about? He hadn’t thought something like that about another girl in a long time. Sure he noticed other women, he was human after all, but never gave them a second thought. Buffy on the other hand, he couldn’t get out of his mind. It was odd. He hadn’t known her that long and really didn’t know much about her at all besides she had only recently been released from a mental hospital. It surprised him how everyone seemed to be pretending that never happened. He knew that they just wanted to help her get back into the swing of things, but it didn’t really seem like she needed that much help. If he would have just met her on the street he never would have guessed that she had spent six years in a coma. She seemed perfectly normal.

He had been careful about what he had said to her afraid that she would freak out on him or something, but she hadn’t shown any signs that she was crazy. Unless you count the fact that she’d freaked the first time she had ever seen him. She’d called him some crazy name and looked at him like he’d grown two heads. After that he had planned to stay away from her, that is until his mom told him they had been invited to the Summers residence for a party and that she really wanted him to go. He had watched Buffy that night, trying to mingle with all of her parent’s friends. He had been the only one there even relatively close to her age. When he saw her going out the front door for some reason he followed her. That’s when the girls had shown up. They had told him to invite Buffy to go with them tonight, and he was going to; they just showed up before he had the chance.

When he’d taken Juliet home she went on and on about how much she liked Buffy and that she didn’t seem that crazy at all. And she would know a thing or two about crazy. Her mother had been in and out of hospitals the majority of her life. He had actually always half expected her to turn out like her mom, but so far she hadn’t. Though sometimes she would go on about the stars and that concerned him a bit. He really hoped she didn’t lose her mind.

Julie too seemed to really like the girl. They had had a long conversation that night after the party and she said the same thing; Buffy seemed as normal as the next girl. So when tonight came around he had been looking forward to it. But now, he wasn’t so sure. It had bothered him the way Buffy reacted to Nick. She had looked at Nick almost the same way she had looked at him when she’d first seen him. But she didn’t call him a strange name. Instead she shook his hand. She still looked at him rather strangely, but they seemed to be getting along pretty well.

Now they were dancing. When Juliet had wanted him to dance, his first reaction was to say no. For some reason he didn’t want to leave Buffy alone at the table with Nick. But he figured that if he made a big deal about it then it would just make everyone suspicious. Not that they had anything to be suspicious about. He was just worried about his new found friend. But soon after he and Juliet had made their way to the dance floor Buffy and Nick had come to dance as well. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that either.

He mentally cursed himself. What the hell did it matter anyway? She could dance with whoever she wanted. But the feeling he was experiencing was almost like…jealously. ‘No way,’ he thought, ‘I am not jealous. I have a girl.’ He pulled his girlfriend closer. ‘Most definitely not jealous.

But as much as he told himself this, he still couldn’t shake the feeling.

Newfound Feelings

James paced back and forth across his bedroom floor. It had been almost two weeks since he had met Buffy Summers, and it had been the weirdest two weeks of his life. First he was freaked out by her, and now he was getting jealous seeing her with other guys; something he had never done with anyone he was not dating. And especially when he was dating someone else. They had gone on some triple dates much like that night at the club and Buffy and Nick seemed to really like each other. That bothered him. He didn’t really know either of them that well but he was certain that Nick was not her type. ‘Then what is her type?’ his brain was asking him. “Just not him,” he would reply. It was stupid he knew, to talk to yourself that way. It was also stupid that he was thinking about them at all. He had all he needed. He had a great girl, a decent job, and was starting back to school in the fall. Everything was perfect. Everything except that he was not thinking about any of those things, but was instead thinking of his next door neighbor, who was currently helping her mother in the yard.

He stopped and looked out the window at the two women pulling weeds in the flower garden. He remembered how great it had looked when he had first moved in, but over the years the family had not been here and it had been neglected. Now it seemed they were trying to restore it to its former glory. He assumed that this had something to do with Joyce’s attempt at getting her daughter to remember her life before she was admitted. The girl apparently remembered things from her early childhood, but didn’t remember ever living in Modesto. She had it in her mind that she had been raised in LA. As it was the family had only ever been to that city a few times, not counting the time they spent there after Buffy was transferred to North Side. The doctors said she had probably installed fake memories in her mind somehow. They told Joyce that it was unlikely that she would ever be the same as she was, but the woman kept hope and she was now convinced that she was right all along; that her daughter would be okay if she just kept up and helped her.

James watched them laughing together and smiled to himself. He was glad to see them so happy. The few times he had seen Joyce in the last few years she had looked so sad and lost. He began staring at Buffy. He didn’t know what these newfound feelings for her were all about, but he sure as hell intended to find out. He turned around, headed downstairs and then outside.

----------------------

“So I know I have really been on your case lately and I don’t mean to sound like a pest but have you decided what you’re going to do yet?”

“No mom. I’m still thinking about it,” Buffy said as she continued pulling weeds out of the ground. She was becoming frustrated with the stupid things. Who knew that weeds could be so stubborn?

“Well alright, but you know what I think you should do.”

“Yes mom.” Joyce looked at her daughter and smiled despite the fact that she could tell the girl was annoyed, and not just at the weeds. It had been so long since they had been able to do anything together. When she asked her to help this morning she wasn’t even sure that Buffy would want to help. She was 22 after all, and had spent the last week or so out with her new friends. Joyce was happy about that. She had been so afraid Buffy wouldn’t be able to make any friends since she had missed so much. Still she wanted to spend some time with her too. She was happy when Buffy had agreed to help her. The garden had really been let go in the last 6 years. There weren’t even any flowers in it anymore. She planned to make a trip to the Home Depot to pick up some seeds. If she had any money left of course. Buffy had spent more than what Joyce had anticipated, but she had found it hard to be angry with the girl. She deserved to have a room that was fit for someone her age.

Joyce had also been surprised to find out how much her daughter had known. She assumed that when she came out of her coma that she would be the same fifteen year old that had went into it. Buffy wasn’t like that however. She seemed to have the intelligence of someone her age, and she knew things about the world that had happened while she was in the hospital. The only thing that Joyce could figure was that she had picked up on things that the nurses or doctors had been talking about. Strange as it was, it made her happy.

“I’m sorry to keep bothering you about this; I just want you to be able to catch up to everyone else your age.”

“I know mom, but you don’t have to worry…really. I’ll be fine,” she assured her mother. “I’m gonna figure something out, and if I decide to get my GED I’ll get Julie to help me study for the test.”

“That’s good.” They continued working in silence for a moment. “So are you planning on going out tonight?” Joyce asked after a few minutes.

“Maybe.” In truth Buffy wasn’t sure what she was doing. Nick had asked her out, and not like on one of the triple dates they had been on with the others; by themselves. She said she didn’t know if she would be able to go, but that she would let him know today. When he’d first asked it had caught her off guard. What was she supposed to say to him? No I can’t go out with you because you look just like my best friend from the made up world that I lived in for the last six years? She’d decided that wasn’t the best option. Going out with Nick would be strange to say the least. She might bring up some stupid thing that she remembered them doing together and he would think she was insane. Ever since he had asked her out though she had started thinking about the possibility of dating him. Sure it might take a little time getting used to…but why not? Xander had had a crush on her for the first couple of years he’d known her and she’d never given him a chance. Maybe now she should. He seemed nice enough, and she had always found Xander to be rather attractive. ‘Plus,’ her inner voice said, ‘if you go out with him it will get your mind off…’

“Hello ladies.” The two women looked up at the sound of a male voice.

“Why James, hello,” Joyce said. “It’s nice to see you.”

“You too Mrs. Summers.” He put his hands in his pockets. “What are you two up too?”

“Oh nothing. We’re just trying to get all of the weeds out of this garden. It just looks awful. Of course it hasn’t been touched in years.” Buffy eyed James cautiously. ‘What the hell is he doing here,’ she thought. ‘How am I supposed to not think about him if he’s here?’

He noticed that she was staring at him and focused his eyes on her. “Haves any plans tonight?”

“Why?” For a moment she thought he might ask her on a date. The thought was quickly dismissed with his next statement.

“Me and Jules were thinking about heading over to Freddie’s later.” She wasn’t quite sure what possessed her to say what she said to that.

“Actually I do have plans. Nick and I are going out.” Immediately after the words left her mouth she regretted them. Though she was a little happier when she saw the look on his face. It was almost like…disappointment. And it was. The thought of her going out with Nick alone made him nervous and he wasn’t quite sure why.

“Oh…okay. When did this happen?”

“A couple of days ago.”

“Honey you didn’t tell me you had a date.”

“Oh well uhh…I didn’t want you making a big deal about it or anything. It’s just a date.” Buffy half expected her mother to hug her, but she didn’t. Instead she went back to digging.

“Well I think it’s great.” Buffy looked back up at James, who still had a weird look on his face. “Sorry. I would but I already told Nick I would go.”

“Oh...it’s fine. But maybe you two could stop by. I mean if you want to.”

“Yeah. I’m sure he won’t mind. Plus it’ll help make it not so weird. First date and all.”

“Right.” They both nodded silently not knowing what else to say. Joyce seemed to notice the silence and awkwardness between them.

“Well that sounds nice. You know I’m glad you two are becoming such good friends.” They looked at each other, neither really sure of what was going on between them. Buffy was still having trouble dealing with the fact that he wasn’t Spike and still she had feelings for him. James was having trouble dealing with the fact that he was becoming more and more attracted to this girl whom he had only known for a few weeks. All either of them knew was that tonight was going to be an interesting night. But neither could have ever imagined just how interesting it would turn out to be.

------------------

Something Madness This Way Comes

“I cannot believe I agreed to this. I’m insane. Don’t you think I’m insane?” Buffy was pacing back and forth across her room.

“No I do not think you’re insane. I think you’re nervous.”

“I am so not nervous.” But even as the words left her mouth she did not believe them. In truth she was very nervous. And not just because she was going on a date with someone who was once her friend. She had no idea how this night would turn out.

“Right,” Julie replied. She had come over to help Buffy move some of her old things out.

“So tell me again why you and Chris aren’t going.”

“Because I have other plans. I already promised my time to someone else. I can’t very well break that promise just to barge in on your date now can I?”

“No,” Buffy said defeated, “I suppose not.”

“And besides…James and Juliet will be there. I’m sure if things start to go downhill one of them will save you.” ‘That’s what I’m afraid of,’ she thought.

“Yeah but they won’t be there the whole time. I just don’t know if I can do this. I mean technically I haven’t been on a date in like six years. What if I screw up totally?”

“You won’t. And it’s not like it’s really you’re first date with him. I mean you’ve been out with him several times.”

“When there were other people around. But at least for part of the night it will be just the two of us. What are we going to talk about?” It wasn’t like she could tell him how in another life he had been her funny friend Xander whom could always lighten the mood and make a situation easier.

“I’m sure you’ll find something to talk about.”

“But what if…”

“Can I ask you something?” Julie was looking at her seriously. Buffy nodded. “If you’re really having so many doubts about this then why did you agree to go out with him in the first place?”

‘Well because James came over all talking about going out with his girlfriend and I got a little jealous and therefore wanted to make him jealous and then he invited us to hang out with them and I couldn’t very well say no to that now could I?’ That’s what she wanted to say. Instead…

“I don’t know. Because he’s a nice guy.” Julie shook her head.

“Buffy Buffy Buffy. That’s one thing that you should never do. Don’t go out with someone because they’re a nice guy. Go out with them because you like them. Because you really think you would be good together.”

“Well I do like him. Just maybe not the way he wants me to.”

“So tell him that. For Heaven’s sake don’t lead him on. That’s the worst thing you can do to a guy.” She thought of Spike then. She had done that same thing to him. Although technically she had done more than simply led him on. And that had turned out disastrous. She could not do that to poor Nick. She would tell him tonight. Tell him that she just wanted to be friends before she hurt him too much. ‘Yes,’ she thought. ‘That is exactly what I’ll do.’

“You’re right. I’ll do that.”

“Good.” Buffy grabbed a necklace off of her desk and started to put it on. “Hey Buffy. I hope you don’t mind but the person I have plans with…I kinda told them to meet me here. I hope that’s okay.”

“Sure. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Well they might not be here by the time you leave. But it shouldn’t be too long after that. Probably about eight.”

“That’s fine. Mom will be here, and I’m sure she won’t care if you stick around.”

“Great.”

------------------------------

The doorbell rang at 7:30 p.m. Buffy made her way to the door. She had a plan. A good plan. A flawless plan. Everything would be okay. She would tell him she just wanted to be friends and say she hoped that he felt the same. Even if he said he had been expecting more surely he would nod and agree. The bad thing was that he might decide that he didn’t want to see her at all anymore. She didn’t want to lose him completely. After all in another world they had been best friends. But surely that would never happen. The plan would work. She had decided to wear the new red dress that she had recently purchased. It was fancy enough to where she would blend in if they went to a nice restaurant, but still not too formal if they went to the club.

She opened the door and saw Nick standing there in dark jeans and a nice button-up shirt.

“Why Ms. Summers you look absolutely amazing.” She smiled at the compliment.

“Thank you.”

“Are you ready to venture out on our night of fun?”

“Oh yeah.”

“Well then let us go.” She laughed at his words. It seemed Nick was more like Xander than she had originally thought he would be. They walked to his car and got in.

“So I hope you don’t mind, but I kinda told James that we would meet him and Juliet at Freddie’s later.”

“That’s cool. I was actually going to suggest we go there after dinner. I heard there’s a really awesome band playing there tonight. Ghost of the…something…”

“Sounds entertaining.”

The rest of the ride to the restaurant was spent chatting about what had happened during the day and all such as that. Apparently Nick’s brother and his brother’s wife were staying with him for the week and were about to drive him up the wall. Buffy wondered about that. Xander after all hadn’t had any siblings.

Dinner went pretty well. They ate at a nice, slightly fancy, restaurant. Buffy was glad that she had decided to wear the dress. The evening was filled with small talk, and the ex-slayer found herself having a wonderful time. She never knew that going out with him could be so much fun. In her mind they had hung out as friends, but had never been on a date date. ‘Why,’ she wondered had she never considered dating him. ‘Because you were too busy dating dead guys,’ her mind told her. They talked about his job and about his life. She found out that he lived in an apartment downtown, had a good relationship with his parents, and had only ever been in one serious romantic relationship. She wondered if the girl whom he had had this relationship with would be someone that she knew. It was very possible.

“So off to Freddie’s then?” he asked her as they walked out the doors of the restaurant.

“I suppose so.” James entered her mind. He would be there with Juliet, and they would be dancing and having a good time. But she would be doing the same thing with Nick. She was still curious as to why James had asked her to come in the first place. Before she had told him that she had a date he must have just assumed that it would be just her…alone…with the two of them. Third wheel much? But maybe that hadn’t been his intention. It was possible that he assumed that she would invite Nick to come along since he had been her ‘date’ to almost every event the group attended together. She wasn’t sure.

“So Buffy. We’ve talked a lot about me, but not a lot about you.”

“There’s not much to tell.”

“Well there must be something.”

“Not really.” She wondered if Chris had told him that she had been institutionalized until recently. It was unlikely seeing as how he still wanted to date her. Though it seemed that that fact didn’t really matter to these people. It seemed almost as if they had forgotten about it. She decided not to mention it.

“Oh come on. You haven’t had at least one bad past relationship that you wanna talk about?”

“Nope. My record is spot free.” She wasn’t sure if that was a lie or not.

“Okay. If you say so.” They drove in silence for a few minutes before he decided to try something else.

“Did James say anything about this band that’s playing tonight?”

“Nope. All he said was that he and Juliet were going.”

“Oh. They like to go there a lot don’t they?”

“Kinda seems like it. You would think they would get tired of it.” She would have also thought that her and her friends would have gotten tired of The Bronze too, but they hadn’t.

“Yeah you would. But I hear they have lots of different bands that play all the time. Maybe that’s what keeps drawing the crowds in.”

“Maybe.” They pulled into the parking lot.

“We’re here.”

“So we are.” They got out and headed inside. She looked around to see if she could see James and Juliet.

Nick elbowed her gently. “Hey look, there’s an empty table.” She nodded and they went and sat down.

“Seems crowded.”

“Yeah,” she said absently still looking around for the couple.

“Would you like a drink?”

“Huh...oh sure.” He waved down a waitress who took their drink orders.

“Buffy are you okay?”

“Yeah why?”

“You seem distracted is all.”

“I’m fine. I was just looking for…” she was cut off by the sound of a voice from the stage.

“Ladies and gentlemen put your hands together for Ghost of the Robot.”

“Oh looks like the bands ready to perform,” Nick said. Their eyes went to the stage where they saw some men take their places. None of them looked familiar. Except the lead singer who at that moment began to sing.

Got an old Smiths' record
and I put it on endlessly.
To mourn a lethal fascination
of a girl named Valerie.


Buffy’s mouth dropped open. James was in the band. She had only ever heard him sing a few times, but never had he seemed to show any interest in doing it as a profession. If vampires had professions that is. Seemed he was more different than Spike then she had originally thought.


She got a XXX rating
and maybe someday she'd have married me.
But, she was born to keep me waiting.
Her name was Valerie.

With a little more time, I was thinking
we could've worked my hooks into you.


“That’s James isn’t it? I didn’t know he was in a band” Nick said.

“Me neither.” For some reason Buffy was mesmerized by him. James looked at her, or at least she thought he was looking at her.


Over a recent complication
I came to find that she'd tired of me.
She wrote the book of Revelations.
Her name was Valerie.

With a little more time, I was thinking
we could've worked my life around you.
With a little more time... WOO!


James’ eyes were locked on hers. He wondered if she knew it was her who he was looking at. Surely she must have realized it. He’s spotted her the second she had come in…with him. Though that was to be expected. They were on a date after all.


Her name was Valerie (Valerie)
Her name was Valerie (Valerie)
Her name was Valerie (Valerie)
Her name was Valerie

He broke eye contact and looked around the room at the now applauding audience.

“Thank you. How are all of you doing this evening?” he asked. There was an array of screams.

Buffy still couldn’t believe it. How weird was this? And what was with him looking at her? Was he trying to say something? She was pulled out of her thoughts by Nick.

“What the hell are you doing here?” His voice sounded hard and serious.

“I could ask you the same question.” Buffy looked to see another guy standing in front of her.

“I’m on a date,” Nick told him putting his arm around Buffy.

“A date huh? And with a girl? That’s a change.”

“Just leave us alone Andy.”

“Oooo. He wants me to leave him alone,” he told the two guys standing behind him. They laughed in response.

“Kiss my ass.” He stood up and started to walk away. “Let’s go,” he told Buffy. She started to follow him when the guy yelled.

“That’s right. Walk away like the pansy you are.” Nick stopped abruptly and spun around. In one quick motion he walked back over to Andy and punched him in the face. The guy fell to the ground. Before the others had a chance to react Nick grabbed Buffy’s hand and pulled her away from the group of men. When they were outside he stopped walking.

“What was that about?” Buffy asked him.

“Sorry. There’s just something about him. He knows just how to push my buttons, you know?”

“Yeah. I’ve known people like that,” she said thinking of Spike. “Who was that anyway?”

“Nobody important.” She knew he didn’t want to talk about it so decided to drop it. Honestly she was shocked that he had done that. Xander had never spontaneously punched anyone.

“You wanna just go?” she asked him. “We could get ice cream or something.”

“Sounds good.”

----------------------

“Thanks. I had a really good time tonight.”

“Me too.”

“I’m sorry about the whole fight thing. I just really hate that guy.”

She smiled. “It’s okay. I understand.” Silence overtook them for a few seconds.

“Well I guess I’ll be going now.”

“Okay.” He hesitated not knowing whether he should kiss her or not. He opted for a kiss on the cheek. She waved goodbye to him and stood by the door as he walked down the driveway to his car. He was sweet. She closed the door and smiled to herself. Maybe dating him wouldn’t be so bad after all. He seemed to at least know how kick some ass, and that was always a plus.

She stated walking up the stairs when she heard a knock on the door. ‘He must have forgotten something,’ she thought.

She opened the door expecting of course to see Nick standing there.

It was not Nick however, who she saw standing there.

No, not Nick at all.

“Hi. I’m looking for Julie Johansson.”

“Wha…huh…” Buffy found herself unable to respond.

“Julie…Johansson? Am I at the right house?” He stepped back and looked at the numbers on the side of the house. Before Buffy could say anything she heard Julie’s voice behind her.

“You’re late.”

“Sorry,” he said. Buffy looked back and forth between them still unsure that this was happening.

“Right.”

“Mommy!” came a small voice from behind the man in the doorway. Buffy noticed the child for the first time. He was small, probably about four or five. He came running in the house and grabbed Julie around the legs.

“Hey sweetheart,” she said hugging the child.

“Mommy mommy guess what me and daddy did today. We went to the truck show and the big trucks were so cool. They were really big and they crushed the cars and it was loud and people were screaming and it was sooooo cool.” She smiled at him.

“Sounds like it. Hey why don’t you go watch some TV huh?” He nodded and headed into the living room.

“Wait,” Buffy said confused. “I don’t understand.” Julie looked guiltily at Buffy.

“I’m sorry. He was supposed to be here sooner. We were going to be gone before you got home.” She cast a look at the man. He held up his hands.

“Sorry. We got caught up having such a good time. And there was traffic.”

“Uhuh.”

“Sorry Julie. But I don’t get to see him a lot, and I just wanted this day to be special.”

“And it was from the sound of him.”

“I really am sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Buffy was still gaping at him and he was starting to give her a funny look. Julie seemed to notice the strange way they were looking at each other. “Oh I’m sorry. Buffy this is David. David this is my friend Buffy.”

“It’s nice to meet you Buffy.” He reached for her hand. What was it with all of these people and shaking hands? She took it hesitantly.

“It’s nice to meet you too,” she managed. She didn’t know why she was acting like this. After all she had expected it to happen. Just not tonight…the night that had been crazy enough already.

“Well I guess I’d better go.” He turned to leave.

“I’ll see you next weekend.”

“Okay.” And with that…he was gone. Buffy stared at the closed door still unsure of what just happened. Finally after what seemed like forever she found her voice again.

“Who was that?” Julie bit her lip.

“My….ex.”

“Ex?” Well that made sense. But what about the little boy?

“And him?” Buffy asked pointing at the child in the living room.

“That,” she said, “is my son.”

------------------

Confessions

“What?!”

“He’s my son Buffy.”

“Yeah I got that. I just don’t understand. How could you have a son?”

“Well…about five years ago I had sex…”

“That’s not what I meant. I mean…why didn’t you say anything before?” Julie looked guilty.

“Because I thought you would react like this.”

“Wha…oh…I’m sorry. I’m not meaning to sound judgy. It’s just a bit of a shock and all.” How could she tell her the real reason she was so shocked was not because she had a son, but because the supposed father of her son was Angel. Of course she had expected to see him eventually, much as she expected that any day now she would come across Willow or Giles. But him showing up at her door…with a kid…that had not crossed her mind. She had a good reason to be as shocked as she seemed. But she could not possibly tell Julie this.

“I know, and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. It’s just…before all of this I had this whole life. Lots of friends…that whole deal. But ever since I got pregnant with Vince it’s like nobody wanted to have anything to do with me. The only real friend I had was Juliet. Her and James stood beside me when no one else would. I had to stay with Jules for a while after my mom kicked me out. Said I ruined my life.”

“That’s awful.”

“She let me back in eventually. And don’t get me wrong, she loves Vince, but I can’t help but see disappointment every time she looks at me.”

“I guess that explains why she doesn’t want you to move to Hollywood.”

“Reason number one on a very long list.” Julie crossed her arms. “I love my son, but sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I had never gotten pregnant. Is that horrible?”

“No. It’s human. We all think things like that sometimes, but that doesn’t make us terrible people.” Julie looked appreciative. Buffy wondered if now would be a good time to ask about Angel…or whatever his name was here. The other woman was watching the little boy sitting on the living room couch. Buffy noticed her smiling at him. She was 22 and had a child. That wasn’t so bad. And she seemed to be handling it well.

“So umm…what’s the deal with…?” Buffy tried to sound as natural as possible.

“David? Nothing really. We we’re together in high school. We broke up sophomore year…and it was a pretty clean break. He was graduating and going to college out of state so we figured it would just be easier that way. Everything was good. I got a new boyfriend. We got along great…until I caught him cheating on me.”

“Oh…”

“Yeah. I walked in on him having sex with this girl that supposed to be one of my best friends. David had come home for the summer and in my distress I went to his house. He was trying to comfort me and…one thing led to another.” Buffy was glad when she stopped. She didn’t really want to think about the two of them together. Even though David wasn’t Angel and Julie wasn’t Darla, it still bothered her a bit to think about the two of them being intimate.

“What did you do when you found out you were pregnant?”

“I freaked. For the longest time I didn’t tell anyone, but eventually I had to. I told Juliet first. She convinced me that I needed to tell David. I hated to you know. I didn’t want to ruin his life. He had just started college, and he had a new girlfriend. But I had to.”

“What did he say?”

“Not a lot actually. I don’t know…it was weird. He helped me and everything. Supported me when I needed it, but he didn’t seem to…really believe it. At least not until Vince was actually born. That seemed to make it real to him. He dropped out of school to get a job. We actually thought about getting married, but neither of us really wanted to make a commitment like that. At least not at that point in our lives. I was only 17. And he was just 20.”

“I understand.” Her mind took her to when she had been 19 and engaged to a certain vampire. Not that that really happened…

“So we decided that we would live together at least until he was old enough to be tossed back and forth.”

“I get that.”

“Yeah. It’s been rough, but we’ve made it through.”

“Well I’m glad.” Julie was quite for a moment, her eyes were once again focused on her son.

“It’s late. I should get him home and into bed.” Buffy nodded. Julie called the little boy who turned off the TV and came running. “Thanks for everything,” Julie said. “And again…I am so sorry about this.”

“It’s fine,” Buffy told with a hint of a smile. The other girl smiled in return before closing the door behind her.

Buffy stood there a moment still taking it all in. Julie and “David” aka Angel had a kid together. But they weren’t together. So that counted for something….right? Not that it mattered. It’s not like he would ever want to be with her. He probably thought she was insane by the way she was looking at him. She knew she should just let it go and forget about him, but there was something inside of her that just wouldn’t let her do that. Some small voice that reminded her of the dream she’d had about him. A voice that told her it wasn’t just a dream. But what could she do about it? Ask him? Buffy shook her head. Right now it was bed time. She would sort this all out later.

This world was getting crazier by the minute.

--------------------

James picked up the last of his things and shoved them in the back of his car.

“That was a good show.” He looked over his shoulder to see his fellow band mate Brian.

“I guess,” he said giving stuff a once over to make sure he had everything.

“What’s up with you man? You seem all down in dumps tonight.”

“I’m not down…I’m just…distracted.” He shut the trunk.

“By what? Trouble in paradise?” James made a face at that. Luckily he still had his back to his friend. Truth be told he wasn’t sure if he was having trouble or not.

“No. It’s just…all this college stuff. I’ve been thinking, and maybe it’s not for me. Maybe I’m meant to stay with this band thing forever.” He finally faced Brian.

“James…man…you know as well as I do that this ‘band thing’ is only temporary. Plus we can’t keep a lead guitarist. Every time I turn around they quit. First Steve, then Larry, and now Dylan. It’s just beginning to seem pointless. It’s fun and all but…it’s not a career.”

“I know.” James didn’t know if he should really tell Brian what was bothering him. Buffy. She’d been on his mind all night. He had been so happy to see her at Freddie’s, but then before he had a chance to talk to her she’d left with Nick.

“Don’t give up hope dude. It’ll work itself out.”

“Yeah. I hope so.” Brain patted him on the back before going back into the building. James leaned up against his car. Maybe Brian was right. Maybe this would all work itself out. He would realize that what he was doing was stupid and that he had absolutely no feelings for Buffy Summers. Maybe. He hoped. He was pulled out of his thoughts by the sound of someone clearing their throat.

“Pardon me, but do you know where I can find a Mr. James Pratt?”

“That’s me. Who are you?”

“My name is Rupert Giles, and I need to have a word with you.”

------------------

Painting Extravaganza

Buffy set the last of the paint on the sheet on her bedroom floor. All of her furniture was set up in the middle of the floor and covered with old sheets her mom had given her. She was getting ready to paint. Julie and Juliet were supposed to come over and help her, but Julie had called earlier and said something had come up with Juliet’s mom and they were going to see her. Buffy could tell she felt bad, but told her that it was more than okay and that family was more important. To make up for the lack of them, Juliet had called James who had agreed to come over and help her. She was glad because she wouldn’t have to do it all herself, but was still a little unsure of him. It had been a few weeks since she had “met” him and they had become pretty good friends. Still it was a little weird to hang out with him alone.

She hadn’t seen him since her “date” a few nights ago. The night that was still on her mind. Julie had a son with Angel…or David. It had been a shock no doubt and she didn’t know what to think. Angel was here. But when he had looked at her, she hadn’t seen any of the adoration she was used to seeing. Not that he would have feelings for her here. He didn’t know her after all. It was still unsettling to her. And that dream was still on her mind. Everything was making sense and becoming more confusing all at the same time, and she only wished that she had someone to talk to about it. But all of her knew friends would think she was insane if she told them everything, and she didn’t want to lose them.

She heard the doorbell ring and proceeded down the stairs to the front door. She smiled when she saw James standing there in shorts and a t-shirt that looked like it had been painted in many times before.

“Welcome,” she said motioning him into the house. “So you ready to do some painting?”

“You bet I am.” She laughed and started up the stairs.

“Then follow me.” They went up to her room and headed over to where she had put the paint down.

“Fun fun.” He had his hands on his hips looking over everything.

“You know you really don’t have to do this.” He looked up at her.

“But I want to.”

“Yeah I’m sure that helping me paint my room was your perfect idea for a Saturday.” He smiled.

“I happen to enjoy painting.”

“Whatever you say.” She bent down and grabbed a screw driver. “Okay first we need to prime. I went ahead and filled in all the holes last night so they could dry.”

“Well aren’t you just the little painter?”

She smiled. “Yes. Painting should be my middle name.” He laughed at her.

“So what would you like me to do?”

“You could bring me that pan over there,” she said pointing. He nodded and went to retrieve it as she popped the lid off of the paint. She poured the primer into the pan and they picked up brushes and began applying it to the walls.

“So what color are we painting this room anyway?”

“Blue.”

“Blue?” he asked with a hint of distaste in his voice.

“Yes blue. Is there a problem with that?”

“No. It’s just…blue? Come on. You could do better than that. Why not red or orange?”

“Or I could paint it black and board up the windows.” He laughed and she did too.

“I suppose that could also be an option. Though I don’t think the dark side suits you.” It was an odd statement. Odd because it was opposite of what Spike used to tell her. He said she belonged on the dark side.

“You’re right. It really doesn’t.”

----------------------

“Well good work team. That only took us like 20 minutes.” James put his brush down and placed his hands on his hips.

“Don’t get too excited, that’s only the primer,” Buffy said doing the same. “We still have to let it dry before we can apply the actual color.”

“And how long will that take?”

“About an hour. Maybe a little less. Why?” (A/N- so I don’t know how long it really takes primer to dry…but lets pretend…)

“Well I don’t know about you, but I’m starved. So why don’t we go grab a bite to eat while we wait?” he asked more hopefully than he intended. He hoped that he wasn’t sounding too desperate. Though he still wasn’t too sure why being desperate was even a problem. It wasn’t like he was trying to pursue her.

“Sounds good. I’m actually starved. I skipped breakfast this morning.”

“Shame shame. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.”

“So they say.” They stood a moment longer.

“Shall we go?”

“We shall. But we don’t actually have to go anywhere. Mom bought sandwich stuff. She thought Julie and Juliet were coming.”

“Even better.” They went downstairs and into the kitchen. Buffy headed for the refrigerator.

“Hey could you get the plates? There in the third cabinet.” He nodded and proceeded to do just that. Buffy retrieved ham, turkey, cheese, lettuce, and mayonnaise from the fridge and set them on the table. She then grabbed the bread and some knives out of the drawer. James laid the plates on the table.

“How about drinks.”

“Oh yeah. Umm…there are some sodas in the fridge.” He went to open it.

“There’s Coke and Diet Coke.”

“Diet please.”

“Sure thing.” He grabbed the drinks and sat down at the table. Buffy returned with napkins and sat down beside him. She opened the bread and handed him two pieces. They made their sandwiches and ate them over light conversation. They talked about James’s band and how he was planning on starting school in the fall. Then they talked about Buffy and what she was planning on doing with her life. It seemed everyone wanted to talk about that. First her mom, then Julie, and now James. But honestly she was happy for someone to talk to about it who understood. He had taken a break after high school working odd jobs and playing at local clubs. He hadn’t been ready to decide his future, which was exactly how she was feeling now. She’d only been out of the hospital for around a month and a half. She was still trying to adjust. For a moment she thought about telling him about her other world and how crazy this all seemed but decided not to. She didn’t need him thinking she had relapsed.

After lunch they headed back up to her room and began painting again. Their conversation seemed to take on slight flirtyness. They would make little comments to each other and then smile. He would purposely bump into her causing her to mess up, and she would do that same back to him. They continued talking and laughing until the room was finished.

“We’re all done.”

“Now can I say how incredibly awesome we are?”

“Yes.”

“We are so incredibly awesome.”

“Duh.” He smiled at her as she threw her brush down and wiped her forehead with her sleeve. She really was beautiful.

Something possessed him then. Something to strong to ignore.

“Hey Buffy.”

Before she knew what was happening he bent down, stuck his brush in the paint, and slung it in her direction. It hit her square in the face. She wiped her face and gaped at him.

“I know you did not just throw paint on me.” He put his finger on his chin.

“I think I did.” She got an evil look on her face.

“Then I believe you have just declared war.” She picked her brush back up and dipped it in that paint. He tried to dodge her but she managed to get some in his hair. His mouth dropped open.

“Not the hair. Now you’ve done it.” She smiled and shrugged her shoulders. They both dropped back down to get another dip in the paint, and she ran to the other side of the furniture. He chased after her. They both managed to get some paint on the other and when they reached the buckets Buffy was the first to pick one up.

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“Oh I would.” He ran at her and she slung the paint at him. He recovered more quickly than she had anticipated and came for her. She threw the bucket down and squealed and she ran from him. He caught up to her after she’d made a few loops around the furniture and had played the cat and mouse game. When he did he grabbed her around the waist from behind and half carried her back to the paint. She managed to free herself from his grasp to grab the brush before he could.

“You don’t wanna do this Buffy.”

“Don’t I?”

“Definitely not.” She slung it and him but he avoided it and grabbed her again. This time he stepped on a spot of spilled paint and slipped taking them both to the ground. Laughter consumed them for a moment. Then she pushed herself up on his chest and looked at him. She found herself staring into blue. She remembered getting lost in those eyes. James was having similar problems himself. She was covered in paint, and yet he still found her incredibly beautiful. They stayed frozen unable to look away from each other. Both of their minds were racing. Then slowly they began moving closer. They were mere inches apart.

“Buffy!” The voice from downstairs cause them both to immediately get up off of the ground and get as far away as they could from the other. “Buffy, I’m home,” Joyce yelled.

“Okay mom,” she yelled back looking at James out of the corner of her eye. He was shifting nervously. Joyce knocked on the door before opening it. She was about to make a comment on the room when she noticed the condition of her daughter and neighbor.

“It looks like you two got more paint on yourselves than on the walls.”

“We had a little paint war,” Buffy said keeping her voice as innocent as possible.

“Looks like it.” She shook her head and looked around. “It looks good though.”

“Thanks.”

“Seems you two make quite the team.” They looked at each other nervously.

“Yeah, I guess we do.”

-----------------------

Fantasizing

Buffy wrapped her towel around herself and stepped into the cool air of the hallway. After what had happened earlier she had needed a bubble bath. They always gave her time to think, and she definitely needed to think. As she was approaching her room she was struck by a sense of dejavu.

“Hello goldilocks.”

“What are you doing here?” She didn’t turn around. Couldn’t look at him right now.

“I think you know why I’m here.” He moved closer, reached and grabbed her around the waist pressing himself into her back. She moved away from him before she had a chance to think about how good it felt.

“No.”

“No?” She turned around and looked at him.

“No.” He made a pouty face.

“But I came all this way…”

“And now you can turn around and go back.” She started to her bedroom when he caught up with her and turned her around.

“I know you don’t mean that.” His face was inches from hers and she was finding it difficult to respond.

“Y-yes I…I do.” Her words sounded weak even to her.

“No excuses pet. Red’s out tux shopping with nancy boy, and the nibblet went to Janice’s.”

’Damn. Stupid vampires and their stupid memories. Why oh why did she have to tell him that? Shit, he probably thought it was an invitation.’

“Maybe I’m just not in the mood.”

“Nose says different luv.” The first time he had ever said anything like that to her it had disgusted her, but now she was used to his crude comments.

“Okay. So maybe I want to, but that doesn’t mean I want to with you.” Lie.

He smirked that annoying little smirk that makes you want to punch him in the face. And she would have. Had she not been wearing a towel, and was she not afraid of getting blood on the carpet, she so would have. Unfortunately she was wearing a towel, which made this whole situation worse. That was just less fabric he would have to get through.

This would have been the perfect time to move away and lock herself in her room. Quite unfortunately her legs refused to move. Instead when he leaned in to kiss her she decided to simply give in. As soon as their lips touched Buffy felt as if a fire had been lit inside her and he was the only one who could put it out. She wrapped her arms around his neck as their passion intensified. He grabbed the small towel that she had around her body and pulled it loose. It fell to the floor, but she ceased to care. He pressed against her which caused all sorts of sensations in both of them. She pulled away as he picked her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist and reached behind her to open her bedroom door. As she got it open he walked her over to the bed.

“Spike” it came out as a moan.

“Buffy.”

“Buffy?”

She snapped back into reality as she noticed her mother standing in front of her. She was still standing in the middle of her hallway.

“Sweetheart?”

“I’m fine. I was just…thinking.” Buffy was sure that her cheeks were red. How embarrassing to have your mother catch you fantasizing about someone, though it could have been much worse.

Joyce didn’t look too convinced, but decided to let it go. “Okay. If you say so.”

Buffy put on a fake smile until her mom walked away. She turned around and mouthed an ‘oh my God’ before walking into her room and shutting the door.

She sat down on the bed and put her head in her hands. What the hell was that about? Thinking about past sexual experiences. Or not past because it never really happened. Though she couldn’t understand why, if it never happened, it all seemed so real. Why could she remember everything so vividly?

It must have something to do with what almost happened between her and James earlier. They had almost kissed. The day had started off innocent enough. Just painting her room. Then they had had lunch. A friendly sort of lunch. But when they got back to painting something was different. They seemed to get closer together, and the talking had seemed to turn into flirting. Then they had gotten into a paint fight and…almost kissed. If it hadn’t been for her mom calling out from downstairs, they probably would have.

She was losing her mind. She could not be falling for James. This was crazy. He had a girlfriend, who also happened to be one of her friends. Anything between them would only hurt people and end up screwing up everything…again. And even if he didn’t have a girlfriend, he was still him. Spike. That’s who she thought of every time she saw him. Even though he was nicer, friendlier, and a tad bit more human she couldn’t get the annoying, jackass vampire out of her mind.

She had become almost 90 certain that the world she had imagined was just that; imagined. But there was still a part of her that couldn’t be convinced. A part that said it was all just too real. The doctors told her the mind was a very powerful thing and therefore her fake memories might seem very real even though they are really not. It seemed acceptable at the time. But now…

She was pulled out of her thoughts by the sound of the phone ringing. She reached over and grabbed it.

“Hello.”

“Buffy?” It was Julie.

“Yeah?”

“Hey did you get all of your painting done?”

“Yeah.” ‘And a little more,’ she thought guiltily.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t be there.”

“Oh it’s fine. You had more important things to do.” Julie was silent for a moment. “So how did it go anyway?” Buffy finally asked.

“Pretty good. Well as good as it can be given the situation. I feel so bad for Juliet sometimes you know. She’s only 23 and she’s having to take care of herself and her mother.” Buffy felt a pang of guilt. While Juliet had been taking care of her poor sick mother, Buffy had been flirting and almost making out with her man. What kind of friend was she?

“Buffy? Are you still with me?”

“What? Oh yeah sorry. Just zoned out for a minute.” She heard Julie laugh.

“It’s fine. It is kinda late.” Buffy looked at the clock. It was almost ten.

“Please the night is still young.”

“And if we were adventurous we would do something.”

“Maybe we should Julie. I mean why not? Unless you’re tired of course.”

“Oh no. I mean I’m tired of driving, but if you wanna drive us then we could go out. Maybe take a stroll around town.”

“Sounds good to me. How about I pick you up in like thirty minutes?”

“Sure.”

------------------------

“So what is there to do in this town?” Buffy asked.

“Well other than Freddy’s, not really a whole lot. There are some pretty cool shops downtown. We can park and walk around.”

“Sounds like a plan. I need some exercise.”

“Yeah…right,” Julie said sarcastically.

“What?”

“You know Buffy, for someone who was in a coma for six years you look good.”

“Thanks. It’s cause they didn’t feed me much.” Julie laughed at her joke.

When they reached the downtown area Julie directed Buffy where to park. Once they had found a good spot they got out of the car and began walking around.

“So when do these places close? I mean don’t businesses usually close at like 7?” Buffy asked.

“Not around here. I mean some of the smaller places close at 9 but quite a few of them stay open until midnight. I guess this is just a nocturnal town.” Buffy nodded and smiled, but inside she was contemplating the whole ‘nocturnal town’ thing. She made it sound like it was a town for vampires. Of course she probably had not meant for it to sound like that. After all, vampires didn’t seem to exist here.

“Oh let’s go in there,” Julie said pointing across the street from where they walking.

“Where?”

“The Magic Shop.” Buffy looked at the store nervously.

“Uhh…are you sure? I mean what if there are a bunch of weirdoes in there?” Julie laughed.

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you.” They crossed the street and entered the store. It didn’t look anything like the magic stores Buffy was used to seeing. There weren’t jars of weird stuff or lots of books. It was a small store with very little magic stuff to offer. Most things in the store were like magic tricks, cards and black hats. Julie went straight for the hats and picked one up and put it on. She grabbed a wand from a nearby container and pointed in at Buffy.

“Abra cadabra,” she said smiling. “I summon the powers that be to take away all of Buffy’s fears and worries and let her sort out all of her problems.” Buffy smiled back.

“I appreciate that.” She turned around and started looking at some of the books they did have.

“Can I help you ladies?” They both turned to see the owner of the voice.

“No we’re just looking,” Julie replied.

“Well my name is Ally, let me know if you need anything,” she said walking behind the counter.

Buffy managed and smile and turned back around. Though she wasn’t caught off guard this time, she still didn’t know what to say to the girl. Willow. In the other world, her best friend, here…they’d probably never even met. The girl certainly didn’t act like they had.

Buffy continued pretending to look through books while trying to secretly look at the girl behind the counter. She looked like Willow and sounded like Willow. But there was something different about her. She seemed more…innocent. Buffy shook her head. This girl was not Willow.

“Hey Buffy,” Julie called. Buffy turned around. Julie was holding a black hat. “You find anything?”

“No.” The girl walked over to where she was standing.

“Well I think I’m gonna get these for Vince. He’s been watching those magicians on TV and using our bowls and spoon pretending to do tricks.” Buffy smiled. She still found the idea of her having a child a little strange, but couldn’t help but smile at the thought. Even if his father was in a weird way her ex.

That was still one thing that didn’t make sense. Assuming she had seen David somewhere before she slipped into her coma, why was he the one her mind had decided to convince her she was in love with? And why did she still have some of those feelings?

“Earth to Buffy.” Julie waved a hand in front of her face.

“Oh sorry. Zoned out.”

“Yeah I noticed. Been doing that a lot tonight.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Are you ready?”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

--------------------------

“Please don’t do this.” He reached out and wiped the tears off of her face.

“I’m sorry baby, I have to.”

“No you don’t. You don’t have to do this. You’re choosing to; there’s a big difference.” She pulled away from his touch and turned her back to him.

“Buffy please. You know that if there was any other way…”

“Don’t. Don’t act like this is the only way…” He put his hand on her shoulder. She sniffed trying to hold back tears.

“I love you, you know I do, but if I don’t do this…if I don’t marry her…”

“Stop! I don’t want to hear this…I can’t…” She pulled away from him once again and started to leave the room. He grabbed her arm and turned her around to face him.

“I’ll never forget about you, you know that. And she’ll never replace you.” She looked up at him with teary eyes. He leaned down and kissed her.

“How am I supposed to do this without you?”

“You’ll make it. I know you will. You’re a strong woman Buffy.” She laid her head on his chest as more tears fell from her eyes.

“I love you Angel.”

Buffy’s eyes snapped open and she sat up straight on the couch. That was the second dream she’d had that felt more like a memory than a dream. But it still didn’t make sense. She knew it hadn’t happened in her make believe world, and was fairly certain it hadn’t happened here. So the question remained; what were the dreams all about? She wanted to believe that they meant nothing, but there was something that wouldn’t let her.

She needed answers. And answers were what she intended to get. Buffy stood up knowing what she had to do. She had to find out if they had ever been together and there was only one way to do that. She was going to find David and ask him herself.

-----------------------

Buffy and Angel

Buffy paced nervously back and forth in front of the building. When she had got in the car and drove over here it had seemed like a wonderful flawless plan. But now, standing in front of the building that he lived in, she was beginning to doubt herself. What the hell was she going to say to him? She’d kept telling herself that she would play it by ear, but that didn’t sound like a good idea anymore. What if he called the police on her and they locked her back up in a hospital because she had relapsed into craziness? Anything was possible. She didn’t know him, and had really only met him once.

She had considered just going back home, but then thought about the dreams. She needed to know what was up with them. Could they really be memories? Had they been together in this world? She didn’t remember that, but then again she didn’t remember living in Modesto either. He hadn’t acted like he’d known her but then again he could have just been acting that way around Julie so she wouldn’t know. But why would he do that? Maybe it was a secret.

She looked back up at the building. It was now or never. Buffy’s gaze drifted to the front door and she shook her head and took a step towards it. Once inside the building she felt a little better. Maybe this wouldn’t be that bad. She approached the front desk.

“Hello mam, may I help you?” the woman asked.

“Umm yes I’m looking for David Carver.”

“And who are you?”

“I’m Buffy. I’m a friend of his.”

“Shouldn’t friends know where each other reside?”

“Well I…” Buffy was cut off by the sound of a voice.

“Buffy?” She turned to see none other than her favorite high school prom queen. “Buffy Summers?” she asked again. Buffy stood in silent shock for a moment and then decided to go with the whole ‘I don’t remember you routine’.

“I’m sorry do I know you?”

“I’m Carrie. Carrie Clark. You may not remember me. We went to summer camp together.”

“Oh…right.”

“You don’t remember do you? I didn’t figure you would. It was such a long time ago.”

“I’m sorry. My memory’s been a bit fuzzy lately.”

“Mine too. I just hope it doesn’t get worse as we get older.” They shared a smile. “So how have you been?”

“In a coma. You?” Buffy regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. Carrie looked at her strangely for a moment before replying.

“Umm….apparently better than you.” They both laughed. “So what happened?”

“It’s a long story. Basically I’ve been in and out of consciousness for six years, and now I’m having a few memory problems.”

“I’ll bet. That’s rough. Six years huh?”

“Yep. But hey, at least I feel rested.” Carrie laughed at her attempt at humor.

“I suppose that’s good.” They stood in silence for a moment. “So I heard you asking about David.”

“Yeah. You know him?”

She nodded. “You could say that. He’s my boyfriend.”

“Oh.” Boyfriend? Angel and Cordelia? Though they weren’t Angel and Cordelia now where they?

“So what did you need him for?” Buffy wasn’t sure what to say to that. She could tell her the truth; that she wanted to find out if there had been something between them in the past. Or she could make up some weird outrageous lie about needing to borrow butter. She shook her head. That would never work. But if there was no secret relationship to uncover, he would think she was insane and would tell Julie next time he saw her. Then it was possible that she would lose her new best friend. She opted for the truth.

“This is gonna sound really strange but…I was sorta hoping he could fill in some blanks for me. I think I’ve been having memories about him lately and I wanted to find out what they were about.”

Carrie got an odd look on her face then. It was almost like…concern.

“Maybe we should go upstairs and talk about this.” She motioned for Buffy to follow her. “His apartment is on the second floor.” As they made their way up the stairs Buffy couldn’t help but wonder what that look was about. And why had she not wanted to talk about it in the lobby? Her instincts were telling her this could not be good. She was beginning to think that she was right all along. That there was something that happened between them that she didn’t know about. When they reached his apartment Carrie knocked on the door and entered without waiting for a response.

“Dave it’s me. And I brought company.”

“I’ll be out in a minute,” he yelled from what Buffy assumed was the bedroom.

Buffy looked around the small apartment. He had it nicely decorated. Though the living room had only a couch, coffee table, and TV it was still rather cozy. She noticed the random toys scattered across the floor. Vince must have been over here recently.

After a moment David appeared from the bedroom.

“Hey.” He gave Carrie a quick kiss on the cheek which did not go unnoticed by Buffy who tried not to make a face at the gesture.

“Look who I found down in the lobby.”

“Buffy,” he said. She nodded.

“She said she wanted to talk to you about some memories that she’s been having lately. Memories about you.” His face then took on a similar look to the one Carrie had been wearing.

“Is that right?”

“She’s been in a coma for the past six years you know.”

“Yeah, I heard about that.” Buffy still wasn’t sure what to say to them. “So Buffy, exactly what kind of memories have you been having about me?”

“Well….” She stopped when something occurred to her. “Wait. So you know me? Or knew me…before the other night?”

“Yes.”

“The other night?” Carrie asked him.

“I dropped Vince off at Buffy’s house. She and Julie have become good friends.”

“Oh. That’s cool.” David looked back to Buffy.

“Yes I did.”

“Then why did you act like you’d never seen me in your life?”

“Well I didn’t think you’d be too happy to see me after what happened the last time we saw each other.” Buffy looked confused.

“What happened last time we saw each other?”

“You tried to kill me.”

---------------------------

Buffy sat up in bed and squinted at the sunlight coming through the windows. She looked at her clock to discover it was after ten. She stretched her arms up and then scooted out of bed. She’d slept in a little later than usual, but after the night she’d had it was understandable.

After going to David’s only to run into a familiar face, she’d found out she had been right about one thing. They had known each other before her coma. And he hadn’t said anything because he didn’t think she would want to remember him. She had been wrong about the secret being a relationship though. They had never even been more than acquaintances. He, like Carrie, had met her at summer camp when they were 12. Buffy and Carrie had been pretty good buddies and had done most everything together. Everything had been great. Until one night. Some of the girls had decided to play a prank on the boys. They had snuck out after curfew with bed sheets and matches. The plan was to make a small fire outside the cabin window and then put the bed sheets over their heads and make ghostly noises hoping to scare some of the boys. It didn’t go as planned however when two of the boys, David and a boy named Chad, had ran outside with baseball bats to smack down the cause of the noise. When David came at one of them with a bat, Buffy threw the lit match in her hand at him and his pajamas caught on fire. He’d run to the lake to put them out, but still ended up with third degree burns on both of his legs. Needless to say Buffy was severely punished and forbidden from coming to camp ever again. Luckily his family didn’t press charges.

When he’d finished telling her the story she had actually laughed. It was most certainly not what she’d been expecting. After apologizing for that and for setting him on fire she’d asked him if Julie knew. He told her that he’d never told Julie about the incident and didn’t feel like bringing it up now. Buffy nodded understanding. The three of them had talked for a little while longer about how their lives were going. Nothing really interesting had happened to either David or Carrie. Buffy noticed how close they seemed and felt herself get almost jealous. Strangely though, her jealously had nothing much to do with them, and more to do with a certain other couple she’d been spending a lot of time with lately.

What was her problem? James. He was her problem. Him and his stupid face and stupid eyes and stupid body that she couldn’t seem to get out of her mind. She opened her bedroom door and headed for the stairs. She walked down to the living room to find her mom sitting on the couch.

“Hey mom. Whatcha watching?”

“City of Angels.”

“That movie with Nicholas Cage and Meg Ryan?”

“No. This was a made for TV movie from back in the late 80’s. I used to watch it all the time when you were younger. Sometimes you would watch it with me.”

“And it’s on TV now?”

“Well no. I was cleaning out the garage yesterday and I found a box of old tapes. I had recorded this a while ago and forgotten I had it.”

“Oh. What’s it about?”

“It’s about this secret agent who is sent undercover in LA to uncover an alleged mafia group. While he’s there he meets this young girl and falls in love with her. He wants to stay with her once his mission is over but he can’t. The ending is rather tragic. I really don’t know why I used to like it so much,” Joyce said.

Buffy looked at the TV. There were two girls standing there talking to each other.

“So Angels gone?” the brown-headed girl asked.

“Yeah,” the blonde girl said sadly.

“We could have found a way.”

“I know. I wish I could have made him believe it.” She began to cry as she sat down on the edge of her bed. “I thought love would be strong enough…but I guess it was all a lie.”

“Don’t say that. He loved you, you know he did. But he couldn’t just stop being an agent.”

“I know. I just…I don’t know what to do. I feel like I can’t breathe.” The dark-headed girl sat down beside her and put an arm around her.

“Don’t cry. It’ll be okay Buffy.”

“The girls name is Buffy?” she asked in shock while also secretly thinking ‘and his name is Angel?’

“Yeah. I think that’s why you used to love to watch it with me. You used to say that since you had the same name as someone in a movie that meant that you would be famous one day. You said that if they ever made a live action Scooby Doo movie that you would have the leading role.”

Buffy contemplated this. The main characters in the movie that she and her mom used to watch when she was a child were named Buffy and Angel. And since she had apparently known David prior to her coma her brain must have put the two together. Maybe out of guilt for what she had done. It was all actually starting to make sense. Her dreams had been memories, but not memories from her life but instead memories from a movie that she had inserted herself into.

Well there was one mystery solved. Now if only she could figure out every other strange thing about new life.

-----------------------

The Other World

Buffy paced back and forth across the living room. James would be here any minute. They hadn’t really talked since the whole almost kiss incident. The few times they had seen each other he hadn’t acted any different towards her. It seemed as if he was trying to pretend the whole thing never happened. The problem was it had happened. Or almost anyway. And now she couldn’t stop thinking about it.

After her discovery of her past with David and the unlikeliness that she would ever have a future with him she’d decided to put him out of her mind completely. And those thoughts were instead replaced with thoughts of James.

Why was she having these feelings for him? It was insane. She couldn’t deny that he was good looking; she had never been able to do that. Not even when he was an evil vampire. But admitting he was hot was not the same thing as having feelings for him. Even in her fantasy world their relationship had been only about sex. Or for her anyway. She had to admit however that she had begun to develop feelings for him, but then everything went down the drain and she had woken up; never having the chance to know what would have happened between them.

‘And now,’ her mind told her, ‘she could have that chance.’ She quickly dismissed that thought when she heard a knock on the door. She opened it to find James standing there with a big smile on his face.

“Afternoon Summers.”

“James.” She motioned him inside. “No one else is here yet so I guess we can watch TV or something until they get here.”

“Sounds good to me.” They walked into the living room and sat on the couch. Not to close though. Buffy found herself a little nervous. This was the first time they had been alone since you know when. She shook her head. This was ridiculous. Nothing had even happened between them and she was acting like them being alone was so tempting. She wondered if he was thinking the same thing. ‘Probably not,’ her mind told her. ‘He has probably forgotten the whole thing even happened.’ She turned on the TV and begun flipping through the channels. Apparently nothing was on TV on Saturday afternoons.

“So…what have you been up to all morning?” he asked casually.

“Nothing much. Just cleaning and what not.”

“Fun fun.”

“Yeah…definitely.” Silence overtook them then, neither really knowing what to say to the other. Despite what Buffy thought, James was having troubling thoughts of his own. Ever since he’d almost kissed her, he thought about her all the time. He wondered what all of this meant, and why he was having feelings for someone not his girlfriend. He had seen her a few times since then, but had decided to play it cool and pretend like nothing had happened at all. When Juliet had asked him about how the painting went he had surprised himself by acting like it had went fine and gave no sign that anything had almost happened. His act like nothing happened thing had been going pretty well. When he was around other people it was easy to not think about Buffy, but now here they were…alone. He tried to concentrate on the television, but pandas just weren’t that entertaining. He noticed that she seemed a little uncomfortable. He wondered if it was because of him.

“Buffy?”

“Yeah?” she answered without looking at him.

“Is something bothering you?”

“No, why would you say that?”

“You just seem…different.” She looked over at him.

“Sorry…I just…” She really didn’t want to talk about the almost kiss, especially not when she was still trying to decide if this world was real. Then the idea hit her. Maybe she could tell James. It would be a while before the others arrived, and maybe he could even help her make sense of everything. It might be a stretch, but she was tired of figuring things out on her own.

“If I tell you something will you promise not to think I’m crazy?”

“Cross my heart and hope to die.” She smiled uncertainly still not completely sure if she should tell him this. He would probably think she was insane. Hell, she thought she was insane.

“Well you know how I was in a coma for all those years?”

“Yeah I did hear about that.” She smacked him on the arm and he laughed.

“I’m serious.”

“Okay. Sorry. Proceed.” She cleared her throat.

“Anyway…well do you remember when I first saw you?”

“Yeah. You freaked out and called me spot.”

“Spike.”

“Spot, Spike…same difference.” Buffy looked at her hands.

“Well there was a reason for that.” James noticed how nervous she looked. She was playing with her hands and not looking at him.

“Yeah?”

“Well it’s because I had seen you before.” She looked over at him with an expression that was nervously anticipating what his reaction would be.

“Yeah. I moved in a few days before…”

“No. I mean…not then. In my dreams.” He looked confused.

“In your dreams huh?” She nodded before catching the look he had on his face.

“Not like that,” she clarified before continuing. “When I was in that coma I imagined this whole world. I imagined my life for six years. Everything that happened to me. I dreamed that I graduated, went to college, everything. But the world wasn’t normal. I had moved with my mom to Sunnydale. It was this town a few hours from LA. We had to move because I had gotten kicked out of my old school. My parents were divorced so it was just the two of us.” She paused to see how he was taking it so far.

“That doesn’t sound so crazy.”

“Yeah well, you haven’t heard the half of it. When I said it wasn’t normal, I didn’t mean the school thing or the divorce. There were…there were monsters and demons and vampires. And I was a slayer. The one girl in all the world chosen to kill all of those things.” James didn’t say anything. What she was saying was strange, but he’d promised to listen without judgment. When she realized he wasn’t going to say anything, she continued.

“And Sunnydale, it was like this hellmouth where evil things liked to congregate and wreak havoc. So I had to stop them. I can’t tell you how many times I saved the world from an apocalypse. I actually died twice doing it.”

“Died?”

“Yeah, but both times my friends brought me back. You know I thought that maybe those times when I died were when I came to in those hospitals. Mom said it happened only a few times. But then I would just slip back in.”

“Well I suppose that makes sense.”

“Yeah maybe. But there are still so many things about it that don’t.”

“Well what about me? You said I was there. What did I do?” She bit her lip. What didn’t he do? Her thoughts then went to the day dream she’d had. She quickly pushed that away though.

“You…were a vampire.”

“A vampire huh? I can work with that.” She smiled. She was glad that he was taking this so well. She had been afraid that he would look at her like she had lost her mind and suggest that she go readmit herself into the hospital. “So what did I look like?”

“Well like you. Except you wore all black and had this long leather coat. Oh and you were also English.”

“English? You mean I talked like this?” he said in a fake English accent. It was close enough to make Buffy shiver however.

“Yeah. Something like that.”

“And my name was Spike?” She nodded. “What kind of name is Spike?”

“It was a nickname given to you because you liked to torture your victims with railroad spikes.”

“Well that’s….psycho.”

“Well you were a vampire. And an old one at that. You were like over a hundred years old.”

“So I guess I was a good vampire then?” She smiled.

“Well I wouldn’t say that. You never managed to kill me.”

“Well it seems you did a good job at dying without my help.” They both laughed lightly.

“Point.”


“So that’s it? All I did was not kill you?”

“Well…no. You helped me sometimes. After you got a chip in your head.”

“O…kay?”

“It was this thing the government put in your head so you couldn’t hurt humans.”

“Now this is starting to sound like a James Bond movie.”

“Yeah. Maybe that’s where I got it from.” She looked at him seriously. “You know, sometimes I wonder if there’s something wrong with me. I mean I slipped into this mysterious coma for no reason, and then I stay in it making up my life for six years. And some things make sense, like some of the people and the town, and there’s even a real movie called ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ which would explain that, but there are so many things that don’t. I remember things James. Things that happened in the world that I couldn’t have possibly known. I have the knowledge of a 21 year old living in the 21st century, but I shouldn’t. It doesn’t make any sense.” He put his arm around her and she laid her head against his shoulder.

“There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“Then why do I remember things I shouldn’t be able to? And why do my memories of Sunnydale seem so real?”

“I don’t know. Maybe…maybe you just have a very good imagination.”

“You’re not making me feel any better.” He laughed lightly.

“I’m just saying. Look,” he tilted her face to look at him, “I am sure that there is a reasonable explanation for all of this. It could be some meds they had you on, or maybe they did something else to make you remember.” She turned away and made her look at him again. “But,” he continued, “no matter what the reason is, there is nothing wrong with you.”

The way he was looking at her made her involuntarily gulp. Not to mention his face was mere inches away from hers. It was true they had been getting closer over the last couple of weeks, and had almost kissed that day he helped her paint her room, but she had to remember that he had a girlfriend. Plus she was kinda dating Nick. But for some reason none of that seemed to matter. Apparently it didn’t matter much to him either because he seemed to be inching closer. When their lips finally met every thought that this was wrong left both of their minds, and all they could think about was how right it really was.

---------------------------

You Gotta Have Faith

James was the first to pull away.

“What are we doing?” Buffy found it hard to respond. In all honesty she didn’t know what was happening. All she knew was that she was really enjoying kissing him and didn’t want to stop.

“Does it matter?” He quickly shook his head no and returned his lips to hers. His hands went to her waist and pulled her closer. She responded by wrapping her arms around his neck. They continued kissing for several minutes only pulling apart to catch their breath. Something suddenly came over Buffy and she opened her eyes. They widened when she saw him.

“And what exactly do you think you’re doing?” She quickly pulled away from James who looked very confused.

“What is it? What’s wrong?”

“I…I…”

“Go ahead pet. Tell him. I’m sure he’ll understand.” She gulped. James noticed that she was looking at something behind him and turned around.

“Buffy. What are you looking at?”

“You don’t see him?”

“See who? There’s no one there,” he said with concern in his voice.

“Uhh…I uhh…” She closed her eyes and when she opened them again he was gone.

“Buffy?”

She took a deep breath. “Never mind. It’s nothing. I just thought I saw something.”

“Are you sure you’re alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I’m fine. Really.” He didn’t look convinced but decided to let it go.

“Well then…where were we?” He started to lean towards her. She stood up quickly.

“Maybe this isn’t such a good idea.”

“Right.” He stood up. “Maybe I should just go.” He began walking towards the door.

“No you can’t.” He stopped and turned around looking a slight bit shocked at her tone. “Well…everyone will be here soon. They’ll wanna know what happened to you.” He nodded. She was right. They would ask questions if he wasn’t there and he didn’t want to have to make up an excuse. On the other hand, how was he supposed to look at his girlfriend knowing that he had just made out with another girl? James slumped back down on the couch. Buffy moved away from him.

“I’m just gonna go in the kitchen and get…some water.” Without waiting for a response she left the room. Once she was in the kitchen she ran her hands through her hair. What the hell was that about? Seeing Spike. ‘Maybe it’s your conscience telling you that what you’re doing is wrong,’ she thought. “But since when does my conscience look like Spike?” She walked to the cabinet and pulled out a glass. She went to the faucet and filled it up with water and took a sip. And anyway…Spike as a conscience? Ha. He would be like ‘yes Buffy, it is okay to kill Juliet. She is in the way after all.’ Buffy almost dropped her glass at that thought. Kill Juliet? And what was this about her being in the way? In the way of what?

A knock on the front door brought her out of her thoughts and she went to open it.

------------------------

“Well that was…”

“The worst movie in the history of time?” Julie asked.

“I was gonna go with interesting but that works too,” Chris replied. Everyone smiled. Everyone but James. He was still thinking about what happened earlier.

“What’s wrong baby?” Juliet asked when she noticed the look on his face. He looked down at her.

“Nothing. I was just thinking.”

“Don’t hurt yourself.” He managed a smile and she leaned up and gave him a kiss. A gesture that did not go unnoticed by Buffy. She made a face, but quickly erased it when Nick put his arm around her. Her first instinct was to shrug it off, and that fact bothered her. Nick was a great guy, and he was good looking. There was no reason that she shouldn’t be having a good time with him. She ignored the nagging in the back of her mind that said James was that reason. She looked back over at him. He now had his arm draped over Juliet’s shoulders and was talking to Chris. Buffy leaned into Nick despite the fact that she wanted to get away from him.

“So where to now people?” Nick asked. Everyone turned their eyes to the couple.

“I don’t know. I was thinking we could head over to Freddie’s for some drinks,” Chris said.

“Sounds good to me,” Julie said. Everyone nodded in agreement and they headed in the direction of the club. When they arrived they went over to the bar and sat down.

“First rounds on me,” Nick said. They all ordered their drinks and sat chatting about the movie.

“Excuse me.” Buffy turned around at the sound of a voice. Her eyes widened slightly when she saw the girl. Her first instinct was to pounce on her, but she pushed that feeling aside.

“Yeah?”

“I just need to get by you,” she said.

“Oh okay.” Buffy shifted her chair so she could pass behind the bar.

“Hey Frank I’m here.”

“You’re late Liz.”

“Tell me something I don’t know,” she said throwing her stuff down. “You taken care of these people?”

“Yes, but you can help me make their drinks.” She nodded as he told her what to make and she went to it. Buffy watched as she moved around the bar expertly. It was weird to say the least, but then again many things had surprised her since she’d woken up from her coma.

“Here you go,” Liz said placing drinks in front of Buffy and Nick. They both said their thank-yous. “Can I get you anything else?” They shook their heads no.

“So how are you doing tonight?” she asked.

“We’re doing good. How about you?” Nick asked her.

“I’m 5 by 5.”

---------------------------

The rest of the night went pretty good. They all had a few drinks and then did some dancing. Buffy did her best not to pay attention to James. She succeeded for the most part though he didn’t have as much luck. Watching her dance with Nick irritated him, but there was nothing he could do about it.

Nick dropped Buffy off around 2 a.m. and she snuck up to her room quietly. She closed the door and lay back on her bed. She began to think about what Julie had said. Maybe it was time that she let go of her doubts and just lived her new life. Stop thinking about vampires and demons and slaying and start concentrating on college and other normal things. Like making out with hot guys. ‘Hot single guys of course,’ her mind told her. She had to keep herself away from James because apparently being alone with him would only lead to badness. She shook her head willing herself to stop thinking about him. Buffy got up and walked over to her dresser. She picked up the forms her mother had gotten for her.

It was time to let go of the past and prepare for the future.

---------------------------

The next morning Buffy walked into the living room to find her mother sitting on the couch folding laundry.

“Hey mom.”

“Oh Buffy, I didn’t know you were home. I didn’t hear you come in last night.”

“Yeah I didn’t get in until late,” she said sitting down beside Joyce. “Need some help?”

“Sure.” Buffy picked up a towel and folded it.

“Mom…can I ask you something?”

“Of course sweetheart.” Buffy looked down at the laundry in her hands not sure how to say what she wanted to say. This was usually something you discussed with your best friend, not your mother. Unfortunately her best friend was also best friends with the girlfriend of the boy she was having the problem with.

“See there’s this guy. And lately I’ve been having these…feelings. But he has a girlfriend. What should I do?” Joyce put down the rags in her hands and looked at her daughter.

“Oh honey, you don’t know how much I wished for moments like this these last few years. I used to sit there and plan what I would say to you.” Buffy couldn’t help but smile at her mother.

“So what did you come up with?”

“Well I’ve put a lot of thought into it and…I can’t tell you what to do. You have to make that choice on your own.”

“What? You’ve been thinking about it for 6 years and all you came up with is you can’t help me?”

“I didn’t say I can’t help you, I said I can’t tell you what to do.”

“So what can you tell me?” Buffy asked.

“I can tell you that it will all work out.”

“And how could you possibly know that?”

“I’m a mom. It’s what I do,” she said giving her daughter a smile. Buffy returned the smile.

“So don’t worry about it. I’m sure if you really care about him, then it will all work out.” Buffy made a face at that. Did she really care about him? No of course not. It was just physical lusty feelings she was having. The same kind of feelings she had for Spike. That’s all. She hoped.

“Is that all you wanted to talk to me about?”

“Huh?” Buffy said snapping out of her daze.

“I said is that all you wanted to talk to me about?”

“Oh…uh…yeah.”

“Well I don’t mean to change the subject but I’ve been putting some thought into your future.” Buffy sighed. She should have seen this coming.

“I really think you should take that test,” Joyce told her daughter.

“I’m going to mom. In two weeks remember?” Buffy replied slightly annoyed. She picked up another towel and began folding it.

“You never told me you registered. That’s great honey. You have been studying right?”

“I do want to pass.”

“Yes of course,” the older woman said picking up the last of the laundry.

“I’m gonna be alright mom. Trust me.”

“I do trust you sweetheart. I know you’re going to do great things. Now that you have the chance.”

“What do you mean now that I have a chance?” Buffy asked.

“I just mean now that you’re awake.”

“Oh right.” The older woman smiled at her daughter.

“I’m so glad you’re back Buffy.”

“Me too mom. Me too.”

-----------------------------

It Must Be Tuesday

Two more weeks passed and Buffy took her test. Apparently all of her studying had paid off. She was happy to have the test taking over with and didn’t plan on doing it again any time soon. But unfortunately her mother wanted her to apply to college immediately if not sooner. It was June and Buffy didn’t know if any college would accept her this late. Regardless she picked up an application for CSU and filled it out. Joyce told her that they had saved up money in case Buffy decided to go to college and therefore cost would not be an issue. For a while Buffy had tried to convince her mother to let her use the money she had saved for her to go to college to rent her an apartment, but Joyce had been firmly against it. Buffy assumed this was because she wanted to keep her around as long as she could. This was understandable seeing as how she had missed out on most of her teenage years. That didn’t make it less irritating however.

So the problem now was finding a part-time job. If she had any hopes of getting her own place she would have to make some money of her own. And that was how she had ended up here; a place she never thought she’d be again.

“Double meat is double sweet,” the girl behind the counter said. The customer smiled and picked up his order. Buffy watched him take a seat and then stepped up to the counter.

“Welcome to the Double Meat Palace, I’m Amy, how can I help you?”

“Uh yeah…I was wondering if I could pick up and application,” Buffy said without enthusiasm. This was the last place she ever wanted to work again, but every other place she had been in the last few days weren’t looking for anybody at this time. After much inner debate she had finally given in and come here. It had taken all of her will power.

“Sure you can,” she said with a smile before leaning down under the counter and pulling out a piece of paper. She handed it to Buffy. “Just fill this out and bring it back.”

“Thank you.” Buffy looked over the girls shoulder into the kitchen. A bad since of de ja vu hit her and she turned quickly. Once she was outside she took a deep breath. No way was she going to be able to work here. Especially now that she wouldn’t have someone to have sex with on break.

Buffy made a face and mentally slapped herself for thinking that. Bad bad bad. Any thoughts about Spike led to thoughts about James and those thoughts only led to thoughts about their little make-out session and that was just not good. She had only seen him a few times since the little incident and when she had she did her best to ignore him. Needless to say they had not been alone together.

She was pulled out of her thoughts by the sound of her phone ringing. She dug it out of her purse.

“Hello.”

“Hey Buffy.”

“Hi mom.”

“Listen I was wondering if you would mind coming down to the gallery. I have something I want to show you.”

“Yeah sure. I’ll head down there now.”

“Thank you sweetheart.”

“Talk to you soon.”

“Bye.”

“Bye.” Buffy hung up the phone and sighed. She didn’t know what her mom wanted to show her but she was almost sure it was something that she didn’t want to see. Regardless she went. Once she got there she found her mother waiting for her at the front door.

“Hey sweetheart.”

“Hey.”

“Come on in.” Joyce gave Buffy a quick tour of the gallery before taking her into the back.

“The reason I wanted you to come down here is we got a new shipment in yesterday and I have been going through some of the boxes and I found something that might interest you.

“Oh yeah? Well now I’m curious.” Joyce smiled and took the lid off of one of the boxes. The she reached in and pulled out a smaller box.

“Ooh a box. I can’t wait to tell my friends.”

“Ha ha,” Joyce said making Buffy smile.

“So what’s in it?” The older woman opened the box and pulled out a mask. Buffy scrunched up her face.

“It’s hideous.”

“And it’s worth over 2 million dollars.”

“Oh…well in that case it’s beautiful.” Joyce laughed.

“You used to love things like this. When you were younger you wanted me to buy you some of these for you and your friends so you could put on a show.”

“That was a while ago.”

“I know. I just thought maybe some things hadn’t changed.” Buffy felt a pang of guilt. She knew her mom was just trying to connect with her.

“It’s great mom. I’m glad you remembered.” Joyce smiled.

“Of course I remembered.” They shared a hug before a voice was heard behind them.

“But Amber I promise I won’t let it get out of control this time.”

“That’s what you said last time and I came home to find broken dishes, mysterious stains, and a guy named Richard sleeping in my bath tub. There’s a reason mom doesn’t let you throw parties at home Shel.”

Buffy froze at the sound of those voices. She knew those voices. She turned slowly and saw them standing there.

“Oh Buffy, I would like you to meet a co-worker of mine,” Joyce said. She led her daughter over to where the two girls were still arguing.

“Amber I would like you to meet my daughter.”

“Hi. I’m..”

“Buffy. I’m Amber. And this is my little sister Michelle.”

“Hey,” Buffy said uncertainly glancing at the younger girl. She had her arms crossed and seemed uninterested by the whole situation.

“Mrs. Summers is there anything else you want me to do before I leave?”

“If you wouldn’t mind unpacking those last two boxes I would appreciate it.”

“Sure thing,” Amber said. “It was nice meeting you Buffy.”

“You too.” The two girls walked past Buffy and Joyce.

“Well I have a few more things to take care of and then I was hoping we could grab some dinner,” Joyce said.

“Yeah sure.”

“Okay I’ll meet you out front in about twenty minutes.” Buffy nodded and when her mother left the room she turned back to Amber and Michelle. So they were sisters in this world. That was a new twist. Though they had been close in her dream world. She wondered if it would be a good idea to talk to them.

“Michelle could you open that box for me please?”

“Oh you trust me with ancient irreplaceable artifacts, but not to have a little party?” Amber shook her head.

“Just do it.” Buffy walked over to where they were.

“So how long have you worked here?” she asked Amber. The girl looked up slightly surprised at her words.

“A-about a year.”

“You like it here?”

“Yeah. Your m-moms really nice.” Buffy smiled. This girl was more like Tara than she thought she would be. “W-what about you? What have you been doing?”

“Nothing really. Adjusting.”

“Oh. Sorry I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s okay. I guess my mom told you then?”

“Yeah. We’ve heard all about you,” came Michelle’s voice from behind them.

“Really?”

“N-nothing bad of course,” Amber confirmed.

“Just that you were in a coma for like six years and then miraculously woke up. It’s actually kinda cool.” Buffy smiled at the girl that she had known for years to be her sister. She smiled back and then went back to going through the box she’d opened.

“Your mom was so happy when you woke up. She called and told everyone. And even though I didn’t really know you or your mom that well I was still happy to hear it.”

‘Wait,’ Buffy thought, ‘if she didn’t know me before then I most likely would not have known her. And if that were true then why would she have ever been in my dream world?’ ‘Not that it matters,’ she reminded herself. ‘Because I am moving on.’ She shook her head as if to clear the thoughts she was having.

“Hmm.” Buffy looked over at Michelle. She was holding a scroll of some kind.

“Shel where did you get that?” Amber asked.

“In this bag,” she said holding it up.

“Well put it back. I have to go put this in the exhibit. I’ll be right back.” Michelle made a face at Amber’s retreating form. When she left she called for Buffy.

“Yeah?” the ex-slayer asked.

“Maybe you should read this.” She handed the scroll to Buffy.

“Death becomes life. A second chance given. Never to be taken back. Let go of the past,” Buffy read. “I don’t get it.”

“It’s like you,” Michelle said, “you know with the whole a second chance thing. And you know being in a coma is kinda like being dead.” Buffy looked over the words again. It did sound like her. Too much like her. “What do you think it means?” Michelle asked.

“I don’t know.” The younger girl reached back into the bag.

“Hey there’s something else in here.” She pulled it out and looked at it. “It’s a ring.” Buffy looked at it.

“Let me see that.” Michelle handed her the ring.

“It doesn’t look old.”

“That’s because it isn’t,” Buffy said. Michelle looked confused.

“How do you know?”

“Because it’s mine.”

-----------------------------

The U in Us

“Yours?” Michelle asked confused. Buffy looked back at the girl.

“Well not mine. I just meant I used to have one just like it and they haven’t been out that long. At least not long enough to be with this stuff.”

“Oh. I guess someone must have dropped it in there then.”

“Yeah they must have,” Buffy replied her eyes still on the silver ring in her hand.

“So what are we gonna do with it?”

“I don’t know. I guess I could give it to my mom.” Michelle nodded.

“Okay.” She looked around. ‘Well that’s the last of it. Guess I can go now. It was nice to meet you Buffy.”

“You too. Maybe we’ll see each other around.” Even thought the girl was not her sister in this world she still remembered her as such.

“Yeah maybe,” she said walking back to where Amber was. Buffy looked after her. She seemed happier than she ever was when she was her sister. Though in that world there had been the problem of demons and vampires and apocalypses. She looked back at the ring in her hand. How strange that it would be here. A ring much like the one she had received in her dream world years ago. The one she’d kept even after it was over.

“Buffy.” She turned to see her mother standing there. “Are you ready to go?” Buffy slipped the ring in her pocket.

“Yeah.”

---------------------------

“That was delicious,” Joyce said as they pulled out of the parking lot.

“I concur,” Buffy replied. “We should definitely do that more often.” The older woman smiled. She was so glad that her daughter was enjoying their time together as much as she was. They had missed out on so much.

“Mom. Can I ask you something?”

“Of course dear.”

“Do you think I’ll ever be able to be normal again? I mean, do you think that I’ll ever completely readjust?” Joyce looked sincerely at her daughter.

“Yes Buffy. You’re going to be fine. You just need some time. You can’t expect things to just happen. It takes some time.”

“I know, but I’m tired of waiting. I mean everyone treats me like a normal person, but I still don’t feel like one. I still think about things that happened in my dreams all the time. I keep thinking about the fake memories as real ones.”

“Well the doctors said that was normal. After what you went through. And for six years.”

“I know. I know. I just…I wanna feel normal.”

“You will.” Buffy looked out the window. She wanted more than anything to believe that, but something wouldn’t let her. Something in the back of her mind wouldn’t let her live this normal life. Something kept telling her it was wrong.

Buffy shook her head. She needed to stop this. ‘What happened to moving on and leaving the past behind,’ she thought to herself. She decided to change the subject.

“So my job hunting didn’t go so well today. I went to several places and none of them seemed too great.”

“Well you know I can always find you a job at the gallery if you really want one.” Buffy made a face and reached to touch the small bulge in her pocket. Why she had decided to keep the ring a secret from her mother she still wasn’t sure.

“Thanks mom, but I don’t think working around artifacts seems like my cup of tea. No offense.” Joyce laughed.

“Yes I forgot you don’t like those kinds of things anymore. But if you ever change your mind the offers always available.”

“I appreciate that.”

“What are mothers for?”

“Cooking good food and doing your laundry?” Buffy said with a smile on her face.

“Well besides that,” she replied smiling as well. Buffy laughed lightly looking up as they pulled into the driveway. Her smile faded when she saw someone on the porch. A James looking someone. She felt her heart begin to beat faster. What was he doing here?

“Looks like someone’s here,” Joyce said putting the car in park and shutting off the engine.

“Yeah…looks like,” Buffy said getting out of the car. The two women walked to the door.

“James,” Joyce said recognizing the man on her porch.

“Hey Mrs. Summers,” he said. He had his hands in his pockets and looked a little nervous.

“Would you like to come inside?”

“No that’s okay. Actually I just needed to talk to Buffy. About school.” He gave her a look that told her that was not at all what he wanted to talk about.

“Well good. I’m glad you two are going to the same college. Maybe you can be study buddies or something.” They both laughed nervously.

“Mom. I haven’t even gotten in for sure yet.”

“Bur you will,” she told Buffy before heading in. “Oh and James you are welcome anytime…you know that.”

“Yes mam. Thank you.” She nodded and closed the door.

“So what is this about school?”

“It’s not about school.”

“I didn’t figure that it was.” He shifted from foot to foot.

“We need to talk.”

“About what?” Buffy said trying to pretend she had no idea what he was talking about.

“About this.” He gestured between them. “About us.”

“There is no us James. There’s me and there’s you…and Juliet.”

“I know you don’t believe that.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that I’m tired of pretending there’s nothing between us. When I’m with you I get this feeling…I can’t explain it. And when we kissed…I know you felt something too. And I know that it freaked you out, and I’m sorry about that. And maybe this is all happening too fast but I can’t help what I’m feeling. And neither can you.” He had stepped closer to her. She looked at him and knew he was right. She did feel something for him and it did freak her out. But as usual she didn’t want to admit that. So she did what came natural to her when he was around.

“So what? You wanna kiss me? You wanna go out with me? You wanna dump your girlfriend of nearly seven years to take a chance on a crazy girl?”

“You are not crazy. I know that you’ve gone through a lot the last couple of months but…”

“You have no idea what I’ve gone through. You don’t know what it’s like to have people look at you and think ‘I wonder when she’s gonna crack and have to go back to the hospital.’”

“People do not think that about you. And if they do…then they’re the one who’s crazy.” She crossed her arms and looked at the ground.

“Look at me,” he said putting a hand under her chin. “I don’t just wanna kiss you. I want to know you. I want to know all about you and your life. What you want…what your dreams are. I want to know everything. And I promise you that I will here for you. If you’ll let me.” She found herself getting lost in his eyes.

“I don’t know what to do.”

“I know where to start,” he said leaning in and pressing his lips to hers. Buffy found herself responding to the kiss almost immediately. She grabbed his upper arms and his hands found her waist. The kiss lasted about a minute until he pulled back and put his forehead to hers.

“Now tell me there’s no us.”

-----------------------------

Friendly Advice

Buffy paced back and forth in front of the gallery. She really needed some advice. Ever since James had confessed his feelings for her they had seen each other every day. She was really starting to fall for him and it seemed that he felt the same about her. And now a week later he had decided that he was going to tell Juliet the truth. He was going to break up with her. And whereas that may seem like a good thing in one aspect it was not in another. She knew if James left Juliet for her none of her new friends would forgive her. The question was, was she willing to sacrifice her friendships for him. In the other world the answer would have been no way in hell, but here things were different. He was not a vampire and she was not a slayer. She couldn’t decide what the right thing was so she decided to talk to the one person she was sure could help her.

The door opened and the person Buffy had been looking for walked out and started down the opposite side of the street.

“Amber,” Buffy called after the girl.

“Oh Buffy hey. What are you doing here?”

“I was hoping I could talk to you.”

“O..okay. I guess. I was just heading to lunch. If you don’t mind coming along we could talk on the way.”

“Sure.” They began walking.

“So what did you want to talk to me about?” Amber asked.

“I need some advice.”

“And you’re asking me?”

“I know that we don’t know each other that well, but I really need to talk to someone and I can’t exactly talk to my friends about this.”

“Okay well I’m not making any promises but I’ll try my best.”

“Thanks.”

“So what’s the problem?” Buffy bit her lip unsure of where to start.

“It’s about this guy I’ve been seeing.” She nodded to show that she was listening. “Well…he kinda has a girlfriend.” Amber stopped dead in her tracks.

“Oh.”

“Am I a whore? I am aren’t I? I’m a home wrecking whore,” Buffy said looking ahead with wide eyes.

“You’re not a whore. I just didn’t expect you to say that.” They started walking again.

“So what should I do?”

“Well…do you love him?” Buffy coughed.

“No. No. It’s not that serious.”

“Okay. But you like him though?”

“Yeah. And I know that I shouldn’t but I can’t help it,” she confessed. Amber nodded. She knew how that could be. She had developed feelings for someone she didn’t want to have feelings for.

“And he feels the same?”

“I think so. I mean he kissed me, and told me he wanted to be with me.”

“Is he planning on leaving his girlfriend?”

“He said he was going to tonight.”

“Well that’s good.”

“Yeah, but I just feel like I’m ruining lives here. Juliet is my friend, and friends don’t steal friends’ boyfriends.”

“Juliet is his girlfriend?” Amber asked.

“Yeah, and my friend. A friend who’s had a life almost as bad as mine. She doesn’t deserve to have her heart broken.”

“That may be true, but Buffy if he wants to be with you then he shouldn’t continue being with her. That would be wrong. Pretending you want someone is worse than telling them you don’t. Trust me.”

Buffy wondered what she meant by that and thought about Allison. In her dream world they had been together, but here it was possible they didn’t know each other. ‘Maybe I should introduce them,’ she thought.

“I guess. I’m just afraid that I’ll lose all of my friends. And honestly I don’t have that many.”

“If it makes you feel any better you’ll still have me.” Buffy smiled at the girl. She was a lot like Tara had been. It was like she could tell her anything and she wouldn’t judge her. Funny how every time she had confided in her it had more or less been about the same guy.

“Thanks Amber.”

---------------------------

“Are you sure about this?” Buffy asked him.

“Yeah. I need to do this. I have to be fair to her. I still love her.” It was dark, which she was glad of. He didn’t need to see the face she was making. Even though he had decided he wanted to be with her and not Juliet he hadn’t told her he loved her. “And after seven years the least I can do is be honest with her.” Buffy nodded. No matter what she was feeling she knew this had to be done. He had chosen her. It seemed that no matter what world she lived in he would chose her over the other girl. She wondered if he would offer to kill her. That brought a smile to her face; one that quickly faded. This would not be easy for him. And she had no doubt that she would feel much worse about hurting Juliet than she would have ever felt about Drusilla. Though Juliet hadn’t killed one of her friends.

“Do you really think I should be here?” He squeezed her hand.

“It’s gonna be okay.”

“But they’re gonna hate me.”

“Maybe. I can’t promise you they’ll be forgiving. Especially Juliet. And Julie is her best friend. If you don’t wanna do this we won’t. But you’re gonna have to let me know because I’m really falling for you here. And I’m willing to give up a lot to be with you.”

“I do want this. I’m just scared.”

“Don’t be,” he said raising his other hand to brush the hair out of her face before leaning in and giving her a quick kiss.

“Let’s do this.”

He nodded and took a deep breath before knocking on the door. He had let go of Buffy’s hand not wanting her to find out like that. They were both surprised when Julie opened the door, a sad look on her face.

“James, where have you been? I have been trying to call you all afternoon.”

“Sorry I’ve been busy. What’s going on?”

“You should come in.” She motioned them inside. “Juliet’s in her room,” Julie told him. He started up the stairs and Buffy made a move to follow him. Julie’s hand on her arm stopped her.

“He needs to do this alone.”

“Why? What happened?” Buffy asked now concerned that they knew something.

“You don’t know?” Buffy shook her head no.

“It’s about her mom.”

“What about her?”

“She died this morning.” Buffy’s stomach dropped.

“Oh God.” No no no no no. She couldn’t be dead. She felt a pang of guilt.

“I’ve been here with her all day. She won’t talk to me. All she would say was get James. I’ve been trying to call him all day. And since he didn’t get any of my calls I’m guessing that’s not why you two came by.” Buffy looked back at the girl in front of her.

“Huh?”

“Why did you come here?” Buffy searched her brain for an answer. There was no way she could tell her the real reason they had come. Not now.

“I ran into James at the store and he suggested we all go out. His phone isn’t working so we came over here to talk to Juliet. We didn’t know…” she broke off unable to say it.

“It’s okay. At least you’re both here now. Hopefully he’ll be able to get through to her. I can’t imagine how she feels.”

“I can,” Buffy said without thinking about it. Julie gave her a strange look.

“I mean not exactly of course, but I’ve lost some family members and I know it must be awful.” Julie nodded.

“Yeah. I don’t think this day could get any worse for her.” ‘I do,’ Buffy thought looking towards the stairs. She wondered what James was gong to do.

--------------------

Heartache

“I wonder what they’re doing. He’s been up a while,” Julie said. She and Buffy were sitting on Juliet’s couch.

“Yeah,” she replied wondering the same thing herself. It had been almost an hour since they had arrived at her house and she hadn’t even seen him since. In her mind she went over all of the possible things he would say to her.

‘I know you’re going through a rough time, but I wanna break up.’

‘I really hate what happened, but I’m leaving you for Buffy.’

‘I’m sorry your moms dead, but it’s over.’

Buffy shook her head. Of course he wouldn’t say any of those things. He was probably comforting her like a good boyfriend should. It seemed that fate didn’t want them to be together. A part of her felt guilty for being upset about this because she felt bad for the wrong reasons. This poor girl had lost her mother and all she could think about was that she and James probably wouldn’t get to be together. She knew how it felt to lose your mother. At least in her mind she did.

Buffy was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard footsteps on the stairs. She looked up to see James heading towards her.

“Is she okay?” Julie asked him.

“As much as can be expected. She’s lying down now. I told her I would be right back up. I wanted to let you guys know you can head home. I’m gonna stay with her tonight.” Julie nodded.

“Alright. I’ll come back over in the morning.” She picked up her coat and purse and walked towards the door. “Buffy do you want me to give you a ride home?” She glanced away from James’ eyes that had been locked on hers ever since he’d come down.

“Uh sure. I just need to use the bathroom first.”

“Sure. It’s down that hall second door on the left.”

“Thanks.”

“I’ll wait in the car.” Buffy nodded and Julie went outside. As soon as the door shut Buffy looked back at James.

“I can’t. I can’t break up with her. Not right now.”

“I know,” she replied looking at the floor. He reached out and grabbed her hand.

“I’m sorry. She’s been through so much…” Her eyes met his once again.

“I understand.” His other hand went to brush the hair out of her face.

“I still want this. We’ll just have to wait a little while.” She nodded and he leaned in giving her a quick kiss. He gave her hand a squeeze before breaking all contact.

“I should get back upstairs.”

“Yeah. I should go too. Julie’s waiting.” They gave each other one last look before she headed for the door.

“Bye Buffy.”

“Bye.” Once she was in the car she silently shut the door and put her seatbelt on. Her face must have shown her sadness.

“Are you alright?” Julie asked her.

“Yeah. I just…I just feel really bad for her. I wish there was something we could do.” It wasn’t a complete lie. She did feel really bad for the girl and did wish she could do something to make the situation better. However her sadness was also caused by the words she had just exchanged with James. She had finally admitted to herself that she wanted to be with him and now she couldn’t. It seemed that no matter what world she lived in fate was not going to let her be happy.

“Me too. But what can you do in times like these?”

“I don’t know,” Buffy said looking out the window. “I really don’t know.”

-------------------------------

Buffy looked at herself in the mirror. She was wearing black pants and a short sleeved black shirt. Getting ready for a funeral was not exactly something she enjoyed doing. She recalled getting ready for her own mother’s funeral. It had been one of the worst things she had ever done. What do you wear? I mean it’s not like they’re going to know if you look like crap or not. For some reason though, people liked to get dressed up for funerals. She wondered how that tradition had started. Maybe because funerals are one of the only places you see most of your relatives and you feel the need to impress them. She reached down and picked up the black eye liner that was lying on her dresser. That was another one of those things that people did that often did not make sense. Wearing eye makeup when they knew they would probably cry and it would run. Though they did make waterproof mascara now. She lightly applied the liner and stepped back to look at herself. Not to dark, but dark enough.

“Buffy, are you almost ready sweetheart?” her mother called from the hallway.

“Yeah mom.” Joyce opened the door and looked in at her daughter.

“Do you have my black heels?”

“Uhuh. They’re in the closet.” The older nodded and walked over to retrieve them.

“Mom?”

“Yeah?” she asked as she bent down and looked through the closet.

“Do you think that Juliet will alright?”

“Well eventually, but it could take a while.” Yes it could take a while. And the longer it took the longer it would be before she would be able to be with James.

Buffy sighed. Stupid world. Stupid world that never let her catch a break. It was always something that stood in the way of her happiness. The end of the world, gypsy curses, secret government agencies, and now a grieving girl. She felt guilty for thinking about her misfortunes when one of her friends had just lost her mother, but she couldn’t help it. It was human nature to want something, and Buffy nature not to get it.

“Don’t worry honey,” Joyce said walking up behind her daughter. “She’ll be fine. She’s a strong girl. And she has her dad. They’ll make it.”

“I hope you’re right.”

“Oh I’m always right.” Buffy attempted a smile even though she wasn’t in the smiling mood. Now was not the time to be happy. It was the time to be sad for Juliet and her family.

She took one final look in the mirror before following her mother out of the room and down to the car.

------------------------------

“She was loved by many and will be greatly missed,” the preacher said concluding his eulogy. Buffy looked over at Juliet. She was leaning against James crying slightly. He himself looked sad as well. The old man motioned for the funeral director who informed everyone that they could go back into the church to get something to eat while they fixed up the grave. Most people began walking back that way.

“I’m gonna go inside,” Joyce told her daughter.

“I’ll be in in a minute.” She nodded before leaving. Buffy looked back over to where Juliet was standing. James and Julie were talking to her. After a moment Julie put an arm around her and they headed towards the church. James stood there for a few minutes before walking over to where Buffy was standing.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” Both of them felt very awkward.

“So how is she?” Buffy asked.

“She’s doing alright.” He glanced back to her retreating form. “As alright as she could be.”

“Yeah.”

“Listen Buffy…”

“It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything. I understand.”

“You don’t. You can’t know how sorry I am. I…I really want to be with you. But I can’t do this to her right now.”

“I know James, and I don’t expect you to. I know that you need to be there for her. If I were going through this I would want the person I love to be there for me.” She thought back to her own mother’s funeral. Angel had been there for her then when she had needed him.

“I wish things were different.”

“Me too.”

“Maybe one day we’ll…”

“Yeah…maybe.” He reached out and grabbed her hand.

“Don’t give up on me.”

“I won’t,” she told him honestly. She wouldn’t give up hope that one day it would be okay for them to be together. Until then she would just have deal with it. He continued to hold her hand for a moment before giving it a squeeze and letting it go.

“We should go inside. See if anyone brought anything decent to eat.” She nodded and they proceeded into the church.

----------------------------

The next morning Buffy woke up determined to make this a good day. She was tired of feeling down about this whole situation. It was a bad situation that she was going to have to make the best of. She took a quick shower and got dressed. As she was pulling her hair up she accidentally knocked the box sitting on her dresser onto the floor. She cursed as she bent down to pick up its contents. She paused when she saw the ring lying there. The ring she had more or less stolen from the gallery. Though she figured it must not have meant much to them since her mother had said nothing about any missing items. She picked it up and looked at it. The little silver skull seemed to be staring back at her. She wondered how the ring had ended up in the gallery in the first place. She hadn’t given it much thought since the day she had found it. It was a mystery indeed.

Not wanting to dwell on it any longer she put the ring back into the box and placed it back on the dresser. Today was about thinking of things other than James. She finished getting ready and headed downstairs. She heard a knock at the door as she reached the bottom of the stairs.

“I’ll get it,” Buffy called to her mother. She opened the door and her mouth fell open slightly.

“Giles?”

She was indeed shocked to see him standing in her doorway, but that was not the reason her mouth had fell open. That had more to do with the woman standing beside him. A face she never thought she would see again.

-----------------------------

The Start of Something New

“Giles?” The man looked at her strangely. Buffy shook her head. “I mean hi. Can I help you?”

“Uh yeah. I’m looking for Joyce Summers.”

“Tony?” Buffy heard from behind her. She looked to see her mother wiping her hands on her apron as she approached them.

“Joyce.” She smiled at the couple.

“Come in come in.” Buffy moved aside and let them enter the house. She closed the door and watched as they went into the living room and sat down.

“Robia, you look so good.”

“Thank you. So do you.” Joyce looked down at herself.

“Not so much with my marshmallow apron on. You’ll have to excuse me; I’ve been doing some baking.”

“It’s quite alright,” Tony said. So apparently he’s ‘British here,’ Buffy thought.

“Buffy, do you remember Tony and Robia?” Buffy shook her head no even though she recognized them both. Telling her mom that he had been her watcher and she had been her computer teacher that had been murdered by her ex-boyfriend gone bad in her dreams probably wouldn’t go over too well.

“It is understandable, we haven’t seen her since she was a little girl,” Robia said.

“Well Buffy the Morgan’s are friends of mine and your dad’s. We’ve known them a long time. They were really there for us when you were sick.” Buffy made a face at that. It wasn’t really great to know that your mom referred to your time of incapacitation as a sickness. She really hoped her mother didn’t think she had a real mental disease. That had been one of her fears since coming back. She hated other people thinking she was crazy, but it would be worse if her own parents thought that.

“Well it’s nice to meet you...again,” Buffy told them with an attempted smile.

Buffy watched the couple closely the rest of the night. They seemed very happy, which she was glad of. Even though she didn’t really know them in this world they seemed enough like Giles and Jenny for her to care about them. After dinner Buffy headed up to her room leaving the adults to themselves. Though she was curious about Tony and Robia she wasn’t interested in hearing them talk about finances for three hours. Not too long after she went upstairs her cell phone rang.

“Hello.”

“Hey Buff. Listen we were gonna head to Freddy’s for some drinks and dancing and we were wondering if you wanted to come,” Julie’s voice said from the other line.

“Umm I guess. Mom and dad have some guests over so I’m sure they won’t mind if I’m gone a while.”

“K well we’ll be there in like 10 minutes.”

“Alright. I’ll see you then.”

“Bye.” Buffy hung up the phone and went to the closet. She needed to change clothes if she was going out. She let her mind drift to James. He would probably be there. Him and Juliet. Ever since her mother had died he had been spending every possible second with her. Buffy knew that this would happen, but that didn’t make it any easier on her. Seeing them together bothered her.

Once dressed Buffy grabbed her purse and headed downstairs. Her parents and the Morgan’s were all sitting in the living room.

“Oh Buffy where are you going?” her mother asked.

“Julie called; we’re going to Freddy’s.”

“Oh alright. You kids be careful.”

“It was nice to meet you Buffy,” Robia said.

“It was nice to meet you guys too,” she replied before stepping out on the porch. She took a deep breath and leaned against the porch rail. ‘Julie should be here soon,’ she thought. In the meantime however she was left to her own thoughts. Which of course were similar to what they usually were. Him. How long would it be before Juliet was okay enough for him to leave her? She couldn’t wait forever after all. But she had finally decided she wanted to be with him so she couldn’t give up now.

Julie’s car pulled into the driveway and Buffy shook her head deciding not to think about it anymore. Tonight was going to be about fun.

--------------------------------

Buffy made a face at James and Juliet’s current display of affection. He had his arm around her and had just given her a kiss. Not two weeks ago they had been bound and determined to be together and now she had to watch him make out with another girl. She had agreed to wait on him, but she hadn’t realized that waiting on him would require pretending not to be uncomfortable around Juliet.

She had to admit that she was happy that the girl had agreed to come tonight. It had taken a while to convince her to come. She was still mourning the death of her mother, but as Julie put it, it wasn’t doing her any good to sit around the house all day. She had reluctantly agreed to come with them to Freddy’s. Buffy was relieved when the manager of the club came up to James insisting he needed to speak with him right away.

“So,” Julie said, “how about we go dance.”

“Sounds good to me,” Chris said. Juliet shrugged her shoulders and the three of them got up.

“You two coming?”

“I think we’ll sit this one out,” Nick told them. Julie nodded and they headed out on the dance floor.

“So Buffy…I haven’t seen you much lately.”

“Yeah I’ve been busy. Mom’s got me helping out at the gallery sometimes.”

“The gallery? Sounds like fun.”

“Oh yeah. Loads.” He smiled.

“I’ve been pretty busy myself. We’ve had a big case load.” Buffy nodded and was about to speak when she heard a voice from behind her.

“Nicky. Long time no see.” Buffy turned around and saw a familiar face. It was the guy Nick had punched in the face.

“Not nearly long enough.” The guy smiled.

“I missed you too.” He looked like he was going to sit down at the table.

“Why don’t you piss off Andy.”

“Or what? You gonna hit me again?” It sounded like a challenge. Nick looked at Buffy.

“I would but then I’d have to interrupt this lovely date and it’s just not worth it.” Buffy smiled sweetly at him and Andy made a face.

“It would probably be a relief for her if you got lost. She needs a real man in her life.” He put his hand on her shoulder. She picked it up and dropped it.

“Sorry I got all the man I need right here.” Andy didn’t seem too happy about that.

“Fine. I could do better anyway.” Buffy seemed unaffected by his comment, which only furthered to make him angry. Eventually he turned and sauntered towards the bar. Buffy looked back at Nick who was glaring after him.

“So what’s the deal with you and that Andy guy anyway?”

“He’s an ass,” Nick replied making Buffy laugh.

“Seriously. Seems like every time he’s around you turn into Mr. macho defensive guy.”

“Yeah well he always makes me feel inferior. We went to high school together and he used to make fun of me. Said I would never amount to anything.”

“And I’m sensing there’s more to it than that.”

“He also stole the love of my life.”

“Oh…well that’s definitely a reason to hate someone.” He nodded.

“Yeah.” She wondered briefly who this love of his life was. “I thought Emma and I were gonna get married. I was gonna propose. But apparently she saw something in him that she didn’t see in me so…” He got a sad look on his face, but it disappeared as quickly as it had appeared. “But, that’s all in the past. And I’m focusing on right now.” He said the last part with a smile at her. Buffy couldn’t help but smile back. Nick really was a great guy, much as Xander had been.

They were pulled out of their shared look when Julie appeared beside them.

“You guys need to get out there. Get your groove on.” Buffy cast a look at Juliet and Chris who were currently doing the shake.

“I’ll pass.”

“Oh come on, you know you want to.”

“Yeah come on Buffy, let’s get funky.” She laughed.

“I don’t know…” Both of them started shaking their heads yes. “Well okay.”

“Yay,” Julie said walking back out onto the dance floor. Buffy laughed as she danced with the group over the next few songs. She felt herself relaxing as her body swayed to the music. She felt Nick’s hands on her waist, and turned to dance with him.

James ran his hand through his hair as he walked back out into the club. He had had to get his band’s schedule worked out with the manager and that wasn’t exactly the most exciting thing in the world. He was just happy to have that over with. When he got back to the table where everyone had been they were no longer seated. He glanced out on the dance floor. They were all out there dancing. His gaze fixed on Buffy. She was smiling, which caused a similar look to appear on his face. His smile faded however when he saw her turn and begin dancing very closely to Nick. He felt a pang of unwelcomed jealousy. He couldn’t help but thinking that it should be him out there with her.

When the song ended Nick went off to the bar to get a drink and Buffy was standing a few feet from Juliet, Julie, and Chris so James proceeded over to her.

“Can I talk to you?” he asked her. Buffy turned surprised to see him there.

“Sure.” He looked around making sure the others hadn’t seen him.

“Privately.”

“Okay…” she said with a questioning look. He nodded towards a nearby hallway and she followed him. He stopped when he decided he was far enough away from the dance floor.

“So what did you need to talk to me about that was so private?” she asked him. He looked at the floor as if he were trying to gather his thoughts.

“James?”

“I can’t do this.”

“You’re the one who wanted to talk.”

“That’s not what I meant. I mean I can’t do this,” he gestured between them. “I can’t keep pretending I don’t have feelings for you. Watching you with him…it’s killing me.” She rolled her eyes.

“And you think I like seeing you all lovey dovey with Juliet?”

“I know, and I’m sorry but I don’t want her to know that anything is wrong.” Buffy sighed and crossed her arms.

“So you keep saying. And I get it. I understand, and you should too. Look, I know we said that we’d wait to be together, but I…I can’t just sit here and wait for her to be okay again. I wanna be with someone too. And I like Nick, he’s a nice guy.”

“A nice guy?”

“Yes, and he really likes me.”

“So you’re leading him on?”

“I’m having a life.” He put his hands in his pockets. He knew it was a stupid idea to talk to her. He was only making himself seem pathetic. But there was something about this girl that he couldn’t shake. Something that made him want to drop everything he had ever known to be with her. It was a strange feeling that he didn’t even remember ever having with Juliet.

“You’re right. You shouldn’t have to wait on me.”

“Thank you.”


“So we’ll be together.” Buffy narrowed her eyes at him.

“What?”

“We’ll be together now. No more waiting.”

“But Juliet…”

“We won’t tell her. We won’t tell anyone. It’ll be our little secret.” Buffy couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“Are you serious? You want to be with me, but you want it to be a secret?”

“It’s the only way. At least for now. One day I’ll tell her, but it’s still too soon to hurt her. I mean we’ve been together for 7 years I can’t just end it.” She didn’t know what to say to that. He wanted them to start a secret relationship. Why did fate keep doing this to her? He grabbed her hand.

“Please baby. I want this, and I know that you do too.” She couldn’t deny that. She did want this. But it was wrong.

Tell me I’m wrong, please.

He put his hand under her chin and lifted her face so she was looking him in the eyes.

“If I’m wrong…if you don’t want this, then just let me know and I’ll walk away right now and never look back.” She wanted to tell him she didn’t; she knew that would be the best thing…the right thing. But those eyes…the ones that seemed to look right into her soul…they were begging her not to say no. And damn it, she just couldn’t go against those eyes.

“You’re not wrong.” He brushed his thumb across her lips.

“I know I’m not,” he said with a smirk that made her want to slap him. But before she had a chance to do anything he captured her lips with his own.

Perhaps it was crazy, but much as it had been in the other world, doing something wrong was exciting and it was about time she got some excitement in her new life. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back passionately.

They were so caught up in the moment that neither of them saw the figure watching them from around the corner.

--------------------------------

L is for Sex

Buffy closed the door to her room and dropped her purse on the floor. She pulled her jacket off and threw it on her desk chair before going to sit on her bed. She glanced over at her night stand and saw the flower laying on it. She smiled and then sighed running a hand through her hair before lying back and closing her eyes. What was she getting herself into? Starting a secret relationship with James was so not a good idea. For one thing she’d been there and done that. For another thing those kinds of relationships never worked and in the end no matter how hard you tried to keep it a secret someone always found out.

“Did you tell them?” She opened her eyes to see a figure standing in the corner of her room. Surprisingly the voice hadn’t startled her. She sat up as the owner of the voice stepped out of the shadows.

“You’re not real.”

“Aren’t I?” He patted his chest. “Feels pretty real to me. But you’re more than welcome to feel for yourself.” He smirked.

“You’re not really here. You’re just a figment of my imagination.” She closed her eyes. When she reopened them he was still standing there.

“One hell of an imagination you got then slayer. I mean to think up this whole world. Trying to explain everything that happened. You really wanted to get away from us didn’t you?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You know good and damn well what I’m talking about. You wanted a normal life so badly that you left all of the people you claimed to love to die.”

“No. That never happened. That wasn’t real. It was all in my head.”

“Just like I am?” She was about to respond when she heard the door to her bedroom open.

“Buffy sweetheart are you alright?” her mother asked.

“Fine mom.”

“Good. We’re you talking to someone?”

“No I was just…thinking out loud.”

“Oh okay.” Buffy put on a smile for her mother glad that she’d bought the lame excuse. No need to tell her she was seeing things.

“Goodnight honey,” Joyce said.

“Night mom.” The door closed and Buffy laid back down on her bed thinking about what just happened. This was the third time she’d had a ‘vision’ of Spike. What did that mean?

‘Maybe,’ her brain told her, ‘just maybe you’re having hallucinations brought on by what’s been happening with James lately.’ Yes. That had to be it. It couldn’t be anything else. She hadn’t left her friends to die. She wouldn’t do that.

Would she?

---------------------------

Days turned to weeks as Buffy and James continued their affair. They were both becoming better at making up excuses to get away from the crowd and spending forbidden time together. Buffy had also convinced herself that her recent vision of Spike didn’t mean anything. There was no way that world could be real, and it was ridiculous to think for a second that it was.

This particular night Buffy’s parents had gone out of town with Tony and Robia to some charity event in Los Angeles so James had taken it upon himself to come over and spend time with his secret girlfriend. He still didn’t know what it was about her that made him want to leave behind everything he had ever known, but didn’t care anymore. As long as she was in his arms, nothing else seemed to matter. Buffy herself was tired of running from her feelings and had decided to just give into them, no matter how insane it might have seemed.

Now they were up in her bedroom, making the most of their alone time. They had decided that tonight would be the night they took their relationship to the next level.

“Are you sure about this?” Buffy asked pulling away slightly from the man who was currently kissing her senseless.

“I’ve never been more sure about anything.” He started to kiss her again.

“But what if they find out?” They had been together for weeks now, it was almost August, but she was still worried her friends would find out.

“They won’t,” he assured her.

“But what if they do?”

“Then we’ll deal with it.” Buffy wasn’t convinced, but the feel of his lips on hers made her forget all of her doubts. When his hand reached under her shirt her body stiffened. James pulled back and looked at her.

“Are you alright?” She nodded. “Are you sure? Because if you don’t want to do this we won’t.”

“No. It’s not that. It’s just…” she paused not really knowing how to say this. “This is my…first time.” Sure she remembered having sex but in reality she hadn’t. Which meant this would physically feel like a first time and that made her slightly nervous.

“Oh.” He seemed to ponder this.

“Sorry,” she offered.

“No no. You have nothing to be sorry for. I guess I just assumed…”

“I was in a coma for six years.”

“Right. I keep forgetting.” She smiled in spite of her nervousness.

“I’m glad.” He smiled back.

“You know we don’t have to do this tonight if you’re not ready.”

“No I’m ready.” He raised his eyebrows. “Well I am. Now shut up and kiss me.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” he said returning his lips to hers. This time when his hand slid under her shirt she didn’t mind it. In fact she raised her arms so he could take it off. She then reached to remove his. He began to trail kisses down her neck and shoulder pulling her bra strap down as he did so. She let him remove the article of clothing, and reached down fumbling with the buttons on his pants.

Soon they were both naked and he positioned himself above her. She gasped when he gently thrust inside her.

“If you need me to stop, just tell me,” he told her. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. She shook her head.

“O…okay” she managed. She was having trouble thinking at the moment. This felt really good. Better than it should have. She pulled him down to her and kissed him passionately. What she was feeling inside was similar to the passion she remembered feeling with Spike and all she wanted at the moment was to have him all the way inside of her. She lifted her hips and took him all the way in. He grunted and buried his head in her neck. To be her first time she sure seemed to know what she was doing. Buffy closed her eyes and put her forehead to his. She wanted to get lost in him like she had so many times before. Only this time it would be different. This time she wouldn’t regret it.

----------------------------

Buffy opened her eyes and squinted at the offending sunlight. She rolled over and smiled when she saw the man lying next to her. He was still asleep. Her smiled faded when she saw the sunlight hitting his chest. She inwardly panicked a moment before remembering that it didn’t matter. He was human here and humans did not catch on fire when exposed to sunlight. She almost laughed at her stupidity. Her mind drifted to the cocky vampire she had woken up next to many times. She remembered watching him the same way once, thinking how innocent he looked when he slept. It had been strange watching him sleep. She could not tell whether he was actually sleeping or just faking it. Most of the time she would try to get up without disturbing him but he would always wake up and pull her back to him. And she would let him. That was how she had ended up spending so many nights in that crypt. James’ stirring beside her pulled her out of her thoughts.

His eyes opened and he looked at her with a smile on his face.

“Morning sleepyhead,” she said.

“Mornin’.” Something about the way he said it drew her mind back to the vampire she had been thinking about a moment earlier. He raised his hand and brushed the hair out of her face.

“You’re amazing,” he told her. She smiled in response.

“You’re not so bad yourself.” She half expected him to say ‘I was just trying to keep up’ but he didn’t. Instead he just looked at her.

“What?”

“I was just thinking about how crazy this is.”

“Crazy bad?”

“No, definitely not bad. Just crazy.” She wasn’t sure exactly what he meant, but she did know that she was on cloud 9 right now. Last night had been amazing. But despite all of that there was still something in the back of her mind that was bugging her about the situation, and she couldn’t figure out exactly what it was.

“Yeah.” He leaned over and kissed her gently.

“I know this may seem a little soon and I don’t mean to freak you out or anything, but…I think I’m falling in love with you,” James said. He wasn’t sure what she would say or how she would take it. He was afraid that if she didn’t feel the same then he would have just made a fool of himself and ruined everything. What he didn’t realize was that he had nothing to worry about.

“I think I’m falling in love with you too.”

----------------------------

Strange Happenings


It was August. Both Buffy and James would be starting their first semesters at CSU in a few weeks. Their affair had lasted weeks and still no one had a clue. Buffy had come to accept it though she still had her doubts. The bigger problem was that Nick had begun pursuing her more actively, and she had no choice but to go along with it. If she turned him down there was a chance that someone would get suspicious and they couldn’t have that happen. But the more time they spent together the guiltier she felt about the whole. She didn’t want to hurt him and knew that if she kept this up much longer that it would be inevitable. The last thing she needed was to have him fall in love with her or something.

But as much as she wanted to end it now in attempts to not hurt him, she couldn’t turn down his many offers to lunch. So here she was, for the third time this week, holding hands, walking through town with Nick. He was talking about something lawyerish and Buffy was having a hard time keeping up. He noticed her facial expressions when he started to talk about eminent domain.

“I’m boring you aren’t I?”

“No no…it’s very…educational.”

“I’m sure.”

“It is. I had no idea that evidence was ruled inadmissible in court if it violated the…tree of poisonous fruit…thingy.”

“Fruit of the Poisonous Tree.”

“That’s what I said.” He laughed and squeezed her hand. He wasn’t sure what it was about this girl, but she was unlike anyone he had ever met, and he wanted to get to know everything about her.

“So enough talking about me, let’s talk about you.”

“What do you wanna know?”

“Who is Buffy Summers?”

“Well she’s this amazing girl with blonde hair and green eyes, who loves to watch old movies and eat sushi,” she said with a smile.

“Well I already knew all of that. Except the sushi part. I’m not too crazy about that stuff myself.”

“Oh why not? It’s delicious.” He made a face.

“Raw fish? Doesn’t sound appetizing to me.”

“Well it so is, and have you ever even tried it? Don’t diss it until you’ve tasted it.” He shook his head no. “Well we’ll just have to go try it sometime won’t we?”

“Yeah, I guess we will.” The look on his face made her regret her words. Asking for more dates was definitely considered leading him on, and that was what she was supposed to be trying not to do. They walked and talked a few more minutes before they came upon the magic shop. Buffy glanced over and halted in front of it. Nick stopped when he noticed she was no longer beside him and backed up.

“What’s wrong Buffy?” She was staring at the sign on the building.

“The Magic Box? Didn’t it used to be called the Magic Shop?”

“No I don’t think so, but I’m not too sure. I don’t visit that place that much,” Nick replied. Buffy made a face at the sign. She was sure that it had been the Magic Shop before.

“Let’s go in there.”

“You wanna go in there?” Nick asked not sounding too thrilled about it.

“Yeah. Come on.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him into the store.

The red headed girl was standing behind the counter. She looked up when she heard the bell over the door ding.

“Welcome back,” she said to Buffy. Nick gave her a look.

“Back? You’ve been here before?”

“Just once with Julie.”

“If there’s anything I can help you find just let me know,” Ally said.

“Actually there is something,” Buffy said walking over to where the girl was standing. “When did you guys change your name?”

“Our name?”

“Yeah the name of your store.” The girl gave Buffy a weird look.

“Umm…we haven’t. At least not since I’ve been working here.”

“But, didn’t it used to be the Magic Shop?”

“Nope. Magic Box. I don’t really know why that name. I guess the owner just thought it would be different.”

“Yeah…I guess so.” Buffy still wasn’t convinced. “And you’re sure?”

“Pretty sure.”

“Buffy,” Nick said, “I think she’s right.”

“But I was sure it was the Magic Shop. I don’t know, maybe I’m losing my mind.” She tried to brush it off, but couldn’t. She would have remembered if it had been called the Magic Box because that had been what Giles called his shop. Though it would make sense if this place was the Magic Box and she had seen it before her coma.

“We should probably get going Buffy; I have some work I need to do before tomorrow.”

“Okay,” she agreed. They said their goodbyes to Ally and left the shop.

When they arrived back at her house he pulled into the driveway and put the car in park.

“You’re coming tonight right?” he asked.

“Yeah. Wouldn’t miss it.”

“Great.” He was looking at her and she knew what he was going to do. He leaned over and kissed her. She did her best to respond, but was happy when he pulled away.

“I’ll see you tonight.”

K,” she replied giving him a slight smile as she got out of the car. She waved a goodbye to him as he drove off. Dating him was becoming increasingly harder. He wasn’t really pressuring her or anything, but she could tell he wanted more from her than she was currently willing to give. She couldn’t give him what she was already giving James. James. She looked towards his house, and wondered if he was home. She really needed to see him right now.
----------------------------

She hadn’t seen him in days and all she wanted to do was have sex. But for some reason the Magic Box thing was still bothering her, and she was all tensed up. This did not go unnoticed by James.

“Relax pet,” he said against her throat. Buffy’s eyes widened and she put her hands on his chest pushing him.

“What did you just call me?” James pulled back and looked at her confused.

“Uhh…Buffy?”

“No you didn’t. You called me pet.”

“And why would I do that?” That was a good question.

“Well I…I don’t know.” He was looking at her strangely. “Never mind. It was probably just me.”

“Are you sure?” She shook her head yes and he returned his lips to hers. But it wasn’t just her and she was almost positive of that. To be honest though, that was not the only reason she was tense. When she’d arrived at his house almost an hour earlier, Juliet had been there. She and James were watching a movie on TV. Buffy had made up some lame excuse as to why she was there, but thankfully Juliet had bought it. Buffy had sat with them while they finished the movie, silently hating the fact that she had to watch them snuggling on the couch. As soon as it was over, Juliet had left, never suspecting what would happen when she did. It made Buffy cringe. How could they do this to her? What kind of people were they anyway?

James could tell after a moment that she wasn’t into it and rolled off of her sitting up and running a hand through his hair.

“If you’re not in the mood just say so,” he told her.

“Who says I’m not.”

“Your body says. And you were barely kissing me back.”

“I’m sorry,” she said sitting up beside him, “my minds just all over the place right now.”

“Does this have something to do with what happened earlier?” He knew she was referring to the Juliet incident.

“No, it’s not that. At least not totally that.”

“Buffy, I told you not to feel guilty.”

“Well I can’t help it. She’s my friend and I feel like I’m stabbing her in the back. It’s hard for me to even look at her without thinking about what we’re doing behind her back, behind all of their backs.” James sighed. He was tired of talking about this. He wanted her to just be okay with the situation. But he knew that she couldn’t, and he knew that all of her guilt and his own was his fault. If he could just break up with Juliet then none of this would be happening. But he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Every time he got ready to tell her it was over she would tell him how much she loved him, and that she didn’t know what she would do without him. How was he supposed to follow that with ‘I wanna break up so I can openly be with Buffy’?

“I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to do this. You shouldn’t have to settle for secret.”

“And neither should you.” He didn’t know what to say to that. When he didn’t respond she shook her head slightly and got up off of the bed. His unwillingness to break up with Juliet was really starting to irritate her. Not to mention his constant frustration with her guilt.

“I should go. I have some things I need to do before tonight.” They wanted to go to the club tonight for Chris’s birthday. Buffy wasn’t really in the mood for a group outing, but she had promised Nick she would go.

“Right then.” Buffy picked up her over shirt off of the floor and put it on heading for the door. Before she left she offered him a ‘see you later’, which got no response. This relationship was becoming more and more stressful and Buffy didn’t know how much more of it she could take.
------------------------------

Nick arrived to pick her up around 7. When she got in the car, he told her how great she looked and she attempted her best smile. They drove in silence for most of the way.

“So I was thinking about what you said earlier,” Nick said suddenly.

“Yeah?”

“About getting sushi sometime. I think we should. You were right; I shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. Besides, then I would get to spend more time with you.”

“And nothing could be better than that,” she said even though on the inside she was still wishing she’d never said anything.

They pulled into the parking lot and saw all of their friends standing by their cars. They parked the car and got out making their way to where they were all standing.

“Nice of you two to show up,” Chris said jokingly.

“Sorry, but beauty like this takes time,” Buffy told him making all of the girls laugh.

“Touché.” Buffy looked at James who was smiling as well. She forced herself to look away before anyone noticed.

“Well why don’t we head inside?” Juliet said. They all made their way to the front of the club.

“I can’t wait to get in there and bust some moves,” Chris said sliding sideways.

“Just don’t hurt yourself honey,” Julie told him with a laugh. The group rounded the corner of the club and started to go in when Buffy looked up at the sign. No longer was there a blue sign that with Freddy’s written on it. In its place was a large silver sign that read…

The Bronze.

Secrets Revealed

The Bronze.

“When did they change the name of the club?” Buffy asked her eyes still wide.

“What are you talking about?”

“The…the club. It used to be called Freddy’s.” Buffy’s voice was rather panicked.

“Umm…Buffy are you feeling alright?” Julie asked her.

“Yes of course. Why?”

“This club has always been called The Bronze. At least it has as long as I can remember.”

“No it hasn’t,” Buffy told her, “It was Freddy’s. Just the other day we were here and it was Freddy’s.”

“No sweetie. It wasn’t.” She looked at everyone standing there. They were all looking at her like she was crazy.

“Julie’s right,” Chris said, “It’s always been the Bronze.” Everyone nodded except for James who was still standing beside her with a worried look on his face.

“Yes it was,” Buffy yelled. “James tell them,” she pleaded with him.

“Buffy,” he said as softly as he could, “Maybe we should go over here and sit so you can calm down.” He indicated a bench nearby. This made her even angrier. He wasn’t even gonna back her up? Ass.

“Calm down? How the hell am I suppose to calm down when everyone is looking at me like I’ve lost my mind. Oh look at poor crazy Buffy…looks like she’s gone off the deep end again. We better have her admitted before she goes psycho and kills us all.”

“Buffy we don’t think that,” Nick said.

“Sure you don’t. You know,” she said looking them all over, “I bet you’re all in on this. First the Magic Shop and now the club. Are you trying to make me crazy? Cause FYI its working.”

“We’re not trying to do anything Buffy. In fact we’re all pretty worried about you. You’ve been acting a little strange lately,” Julie said.

“Me? I’m the one who’s been acting strange?”

“Maybe I should just take you home,” Nick said.

“I think that’s a good idea,” Juliet said. Buffy didn’t protest. Instead she turned and headed for his car.

“Sorry guys,” Nick said.

“It’s not your fault she’s losing it again,” Juliet said.

“She’s not losing it,” James told her sternly. Juliet gave him a slightly hurt look.

“Of course you wouldn’t think so.” She looked at him distastefully.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” he asked her.

“You know good and damn well what it means. I see the way you act around her. I’m not an idiot James. I know there’s something going on with you two.” Buffy drew in a breath as everyone looked at her accusingly.

“Buffy, is that true?” Julie asked.

“I…uhh…” Buffy looked to James for help. He gave her a worried look.

“Don’t even try to deny it,” Juliet said looking back and forth between them.

“Juliet please. Can we go somewhere else and talk about this?”

“No!” she practically yelled at him, “We will talk about this right here…in front of all your friends.” He looked around the group. No one looked happy.

“Listen. This is between you and me, so let’s go home and we’ll talk.” She shook her head.

“Actually James, it would seem that this is between you and Buffy.” James didn’t know what to say to her.

“Juliet…” Buffy started.

“You shut the hell up. Don’t ever ever speak to me again.”

“Don’t talk to her like that,” James said. Juliet got a look of realization on her face.

“Oh my God. You’ve been sleeping with her haven’t you?” James didn’t respond.

“You have…” Angry tears ran down her cheeks. “You have you bastard. How long?” He still didn’t say anything. “How could you do this to me? 7 years. We’ve been together 7 years and you’ve known her for what?...3 months?” She was crying now.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you baby.” He reached for her but she pulled back.

“Don’t touch me.” She backed away from the group. “I need to get out of here.” She started off down the street.

“I can’t believe you did this.” It was Julie this time.

“I’m sorry…” Buffy managed. Julie only shook her head and went after Juliet. Chris, who had not yet said anything gave James an unsure look before heading after the girls.

Buffy felt like crying. This was all too much. She had only been back a few months and had already lost all of her friends. She looked up at Nick. He looked angry. What was she going to say to him?

“Nick I…”

“Don’t. Whatever you have to say, I don’t wanna hear it. I just…I can’t believe I wasted my time with you.” He turned and walked away. Tears formed in Buffy’s eyes. She had never meant to hurt him. She folded her arms over her chest as the tears fell.

They both stood there for what seemed like forever before he spoke.

“Do you want me to take you home?”

“Sure.” They walked back to his car. The ride home was in silence. When they reached her house they sat there, Buffy looking at her hands, James staring at the steering wheel.

“I’m sorry,” Buffy said at last.

“S’not your fault. I’m the one who started everything. You kept telling me they would find out. I just didn’t want to accept that.”

“You didn’t make me be with you. I chose to. If I really wanted to keep from hurting my friends I wouldn’t have…” she said looking out the window. The lights in the living room were on.

“So what are we going to do now?” She looked back at him.

“I don’t know.” And she really really didn’t. “I wish Giles was here,” she said absently.

“Giles?” James asked.

“Yeah. He was my…father figure in the other world. He always knew what to do.”

“Even what to do when you were caught having an affair of sorts.” She smiled slightly.

“I’m not sure. It never really came up.” He smiled then. How had he let this happen to him? A few months ago he’d had a great girl, played in a decent band, and was getting ready for a future. Now he was sitting in his car with his secret lover listening to her talk about a fantasy world and a man named Giles. What kind of name was Giles anyway? And that’s when he remembered.

“Giles.” Buffy looked at him strangely.

“What?”

“A couple of months ago after I played a show one night, the night you and Nick were there on your date, I was loading my car when a man came up to me and said he needed to talk to me. He said his name was something Giles. I think it started with an r. Like Robert or Rudy or something.”

“Rupert?” Buffy asked.

“Yeah. Rupert Giles.” The look on her face told him that name was significant. “Buffy? Was that the name of your Giles?” She nodded.

“What did he say?”

“Umm…he said he needed my help. Something about a girl. He wanted me to find her, and tell her something.”

“Tell her what?” He closed his eyes trying to remember.

“I think it was something like tell her Dawn needs her. I don’t know what that means.”

“Oh God.” Dawn. Like her sister Dawn. Could it be? Could that have really been Giles coming to find her? Maybe Willow had done a spell to get him in her head. Wouldn’t be the first time she’d been trapped inside her own mind.

“Buffy? Do you know what that means?”

“I think I do.” But there was one more thing, one thing that would prove if this world was real or not. She knew then what she had to do.

----------------------------

There’s No Place Like Sunnydale


“What are we looking for again?”

“Proof.”

“Proof that this world is fake and all in your head?” James was having a hard time wrapping his head around this.

“Yep.” And she seemed so serious about it. But as insane as it sounded he loved this woman and would do anything she wanted him to do. Like following her to a magic shop to look for a potion.

“And you think we’re going to find that proof here?”

“I’m hoping.” They were looking through some of the books in the shop.

“Where would you find information on other worlds?”

“Hell if I know. Research was never my thing.” He smiled slightly. Ally approached them with more books in her hands.

“Here are some more books to look through. They might be helpful.”

“Thanks,” Buffy replied. The red headed girl wasn’t too sure about Buffy. She was convinced that she could find a real spell in one of these books that would send her back to her “real” world. She had also told her that in this “real” world there had been someone who looked exactly like her, but was named Willow. Strange? Yes. But there was something about her that made Ally trust her. She just couldn’t figure out exactly what it was. Her eyes went to the couple and she watched James elbow Buffy slightly. The girl returned it a bit harder. They smiled at each other and went back to reading. Ally decided to ask a question that had been on her mind.

“So are you guys like a couple or something?” They looked at her and then at each other, neither really knowing the answer to that question.

“Why do you ask?” Buffy said.

“I saw you at the Bronze a couple of weeks ago. You were making out near the bathrooms.”

“Oh.”

“And I had seen you dancing with that other guy, the one you brought in here the other day, so I wasn’t sure what was going on,” she told Buffy.

“Yeah that was…something I should have never done.” Hurting Nick had been one of the worst things about their whole situation. Ally nodded sensing that the girl didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

“Well I’m gonna go look for some more books,” she said leaving the two alone once again.

“So you really think this is all in your head?” he asked her after a minute.

“I…I don’t know James. I mean sometimes it seems so real, but then sometimes…” She felt a hand on hers and tried to smile. If she did find a way to prove this world wasn’t real she would have to leave him. And now that everyone knew about them they could be together. No more secrets. ‘But,’ her mind kept reminding her, ‘this isn’t real.’

“Earth to Buffy.” She glanced at James.

“What?”

“I said I think I found something.” She looked down at the book he had, and read over the page. He was right. It was a spell for returning someone to where they belong. How fitting.

“This just might work,” Buffy said.

“What might work?” the red headed girl asked setting down the most recent handful of books she was carrying.

“This spell.” Buffy pointed to the page.

Ally picked up the book.

“I think we have all of these ingredients here.”

“Good. That means we can do this tonight.”

“Tonight?” James asked. “You wanna do this tonight?”

“The sooner I find out if this world is real or not, the sooner I can move on with my life.” She had a point. He was ready to move passed all of this craziness and try to have a normal relationship with her.

“Do you think you can do it?” Buffy asked Ally.

“Me? I don’t know. I’ve never tried to do real magic.”

“Well your counterpart in my world can. She’s like super-witch. So I’m sure if this is in my head then you can too.” The girl nodded warily.

“I’ll try.”

“Thanks.” Ally shrugged.

“I’ll see if I can find these ingredients.” She walked towards the shelves of assorted items in search of what she needed.

“Are you sure about this?” James asked Buffy.

“I’m sure.” Even though to be perfectly honest she wasn’t. She was sure this world was not the real world, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to leave it. Here she could be normal and maybe even get to live happily ever after. But she couldn’t abandon Willow, Xander, and Dawn…especially Dawn.

“And if it doesn’t work?”

“It will.”

“But if it doesn’t…can we let it go and try to salvage our lives here? I still want to be with you.” The look on his face was enough to make her say yes even though a part of her knew that she would never be able to let this go. His reply was a kiss.

“When are we going to do this?” Ally asked pulling the couple out of their moment. She had returned with a few things and set them on the table.

“Soon,” Buffy replied. “There are a few things I need to do first.” She nodded.

“I’ll try to get everything ready,” she said, “but I’ve never done anything like this before.”

“Okay. I’ll be back soon.” Buffy and James walked out the door.

“So where are we going?” James asked.

“I want to go see my mom.” They got into his car and drove to Buffy’s house.

“Do you want me to pick you up in a few?” he asked. She took a breath, not knowing how to tell him this.

“Listen James…I…you can’t be there.”

“Why the hell not?”

“It would just be too hard.”

“Buffy…”

“Please. Please. Look, if it doesn’t work I’ll come find you. I promise. But I can’t have you here.” He didn’t seem too happy about it, but nodded. If she didn’t want him here he needed to respect her wishes. “Thank you.” She leaned over and kissed him for what would possibly be the last time. When she finally pulled away she wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered in his ear.

“I’ll miss you.” Before he had a chance to reply she pulled away and got out of the car. Looking back wouldn’t be good. When she stepped inside the house her stomach dropped. Her mother was sitting on the couch watching something on TV. The older woman looked up as Buffy came in the room.

“Hey honey. You have fun tonight?”

“Yeah…uhh…I need to talk to you mom.”

“What is it sweetheart?” She motioned for her daughter to sit on the couch beside her. Buffy sat down and took a deep breath. This was going to be one of the hardest things she would ever have to do.

“I just want you to know that I love you.”

“I love you too honey.” Buffy smiled slightly though her eyes had begun to fill up with tears.

Not knowing what else to say, “I’m not crazy.”

“What?” Joyce asked confused.

“I’m not crazy.”

“Well no one said you were dear.” She was becoming more and more worried about her daughter.

“You have to understand. It’s not real.”

“What’s not real?”

“This. This house, this town, these people, all of it. It’s not real. It’s in my head. It’s been in my head the whole time. I just wanted to believe it so badly that I didn’t see what was right in front of my face.”

“Buffy, honey you’re starting to scare me.” Buffy looked at her mother with sad eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? You have nothing to be sorry for.” But she did. She had a lot to be sorry for. It was time to stop pretending. It was time to make things right. Buffy hugged the older woman.

“Tell daddy I love him,” she whispered. And with that she let go of Joyce and started backing away.

“I love you mom, but I have to go.” And she knew what that meant. She had heard it many times before.

“Buffy no.”

“I have to.” Joyce reached for her.

“No baby please. Stay with me.” Buffy shook her head and without another word turned and ran out the front door. She could feel the tears sliding down her face as she ran, but she couldn’t turn back now. She had to get home. Her real home. She stopped running when she reached the magic shop. It was now or never.

She started to open the door when she heard a voice behind her.

“Buffy.” It was James. ‘Not now,’ Buffy thought. She couldn’t face him too. “Buffy.” His hand on her arm forced her to look at him.

“I told you not to come.”

“I know you did, but you didn’t really expect me to listen did you?” No, of course she hadn’t expected him to listen, but she had hoped that he would.

“I can’t do this right now, I have to go.”

“You can’t. I can’t let you do this.” He pulled her closer. “I love you Buffy, more than anything. These last couple of months have been the best of my life. I’ve never known anyone like you, and I know I may not be the best guy in the world, and I know that I made you lie about us and I’m sorry about that. But we don’t have to lie anymore. We can be together.” Tears had returned to her eyes. She shook her head.

“No. I have to go. This isn’t real.”

“Yes it is. It’s so real.”

“No…” she turned her head away from him and he forced her to look at him.

“Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t love me.” And she couldn’t. Because it would be a lie.

“Please don’t make this harder.” Last time she’d said those words, the man she’d been speaking to had not listened. And a part of her was hoping that this one would not either.

“How am I just supposed to sit back and watch the woman I love do something like this? What if it does work? Then I will never see you again.” The more he’d thought about it the more convinced he’d become that it was in fact possible. And if it were he did not want to lose the only thing that made any sense to him.

“I…I don’t know. But you have to let me go.” He put his forehead to hers.

“Please Buffy. Don’t do this.” She was steadily crying now and he pressed his lips to hers. She kissed him back for a moment before pulling away.

“I do love you, but you’re not real.”

“Yes I am. Feel me. I’m real.” He brought her hand to his chest. “You feel that. That’s my heart…pounding because I’m afraid of losing you.” She shook her head and pulled her hand back stepping away from him.

“I’m sorry.” She turned and ran into the shop closing and locking the door behind her. She couldn’t look at him anymore. She just had to keep telling herself that he wasn’t real.

Ally was sitting at one of the tables in the shop. She had gotten everything set up and was looking through one of the books.

“Hey Buffy,” the girl said looking up from the book.

“Hey.” Ally noticed the tears on her cheeks.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she said wiping the tears from her face. “Let’s do this.” She needed to get this done before she changed her mind. She heard knocking on the door, but told Ally to ignore it.

“Okay, but Buffy, I’m not sure this is going to work. I’m not a real witch you know.”

“You can do this. I know you can. If you’re anything like Willow you have the power inside of you.” This gave the girl a bit of confidence even though she didn’t like how much Buffy seemed to be counting on her to make this work. She’d never really even attempted to cast a real spell before and now she was trying to send someone back to her own world. “I just hope my pronunciation is in the ballpark.”

Buffy moved to the center of the room and steadied herself as Ally began to chant the words from the page. After a moment a bright light formed in front of her and she paused staring wide-eyed at the sight. Buffy nodded for her to continue and she swallowed before picking up where she left off. The light got bigger and brighter and eventually Buffy had to shield her eyes. She felt a strange sensation and then…nothing.

-------------------------------

Buffy blinked as she opened her eyes. The bright light was gone, and was replaced by sunlight. It took a moment for her eyes to adjust, but when they finally did she noticed that she was lying on a bed. She looked around to see that she was in her room…in her house…in Sunnydale. She smiled. Home sweet home. Her gaze then went to the door as it opened and her sister walked in.

“I know Janice, but she’s so stupid. You know she did the same thing last year with that Tommy guy.” Buffy smiled at her gossiping. “She’s really just a slut. I can’t believe…” she broke off when she saw that Buffy was sitting up in the bed. The phone fell to the floor.

“Buffy, you’re awake,” Dawn exclaimed.

“Yeah.” The younger girl ran over and hugged her sister.

“I was afraid you weren’t gonna wake up.” Buffy hugged her back and felt herself tearing up a little bit. How could she have ever believed this world wasn’t real?

“How long was I out?”

“A few weeks.” Buffy nodded glad that it hadn’t been longer. Dawn pulled back and Buffy noticed the tears on her face.

“I’m sorry Dawnie. I’m so sorry.” She couldn’t hold her own tears back any longer.

“It’s okay. You’re back now and that’s all that matters.”

‘Yes,’ Buffy thought, ‘I’m back, and I’ll never leave again.’

----------------------------

Living


“I’m sorry.”

“How many times am I going to have to ask you not to apologize? It’s not your fault. You were under a spell,” Willow reminded her.

“But I should have been able to see through it.”

“You did.”

“But not before all of you were almost killed by a demon.”

“It’s not like it’s the first time that’s happened.” Buffy knew Willow was trying to make light of the situation, but it didn’t make her feel any better. She had been unconscious for weeks and in the meantime her friends had had to take over her duties for her.

“Yeah. But I should have been here for you guys, not off gallivanting around with imaginary people.” Her mind drifted to James. That was one of the hard parts about leaving that world behind. James and her mother.

“We’re just glad your back.” The gang had tried everything they could think of to try to bring Buffy back. They had even sent Giles into her head once to try to reach her, but had no luck. The only person he had been able to talk to was Buffy’s make-believe version of Spike. According to Giles he had looked the same, but had been American and human. And also in a rock band. Willow considered questioning Buffy about that, but figured she would at least wait until the initial shock wore off.

“Me too. Stupid nerds. They are so gonna pay for this.”

“We’ve been keeping tabs on them the last few weeks. They don’t seem to be up to anything too bad as of right now.”

“Don’t underestimate them. They’re diabolical losers with lots of gadgets and nothing better to do than torment me.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it. I sort of cast a little spell on them.”

“Oh you did, did you?”

“Don’t worry. It’s nothing much. Just a little confusion spell.” Buffy wasn’t sure exactly what that meant but she was just happy knowing they would be off of her back for a little while. Buffy sat back on the couch while Willow continued to fold clothes.

“So what I saw, it was all in my head? Cause let me just say, some of the things that happened were a little crazy.”

“Well it shouldn’t have been all that abnormal. I did some research on the demon that infected you. The poison makes you see what you want to see.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, everything that happened were ideas you already had in your head. Things you wanted.”

“You’re saying I wanted to be friends with Darla and Dru? And that I wanted Dawn to be Tara’s sister and not mine?”

“Maybe on some level you wished you could have gotten along with them, and your mind turned that into friendship. And as for the Dawn thing, maybe you just thought she would be safer if she wasn’t your sister.”

“Well that makes sense I guess,” Buffy said. Then something popped into her head. Something rather terrifying.

“So if I loved someone in that world, what would that mean?”

“Probably that you have some subconscious desire to be with them, to love them in this world. Why who was it?”

“No one. It was just hypothetical.” Willow wasn’t sure if she believed that, but decided to let it go. If Buffy wanted to talk about it, she would.

“I uhh…I need to…patrol. I’m feeling kind of restless.”

“Okay. Well I’m going out tonight. Xander wants me to go with him to see the midnight showing of Scooby Doo. Mostly he just thinks Daphne’s hott.”

“Really? I don’t think she’s that hott.”

“Me neither, but I promised I would go so…You’re welcome to come with.”

“No thanks. I’d rather deal with real monsters.”

“And coming from anyone else that would be an odd statement.” Buffy smiled at her friend. She really was glad to be back home.

“Well I’ll see you later Wil.”

“Have fun killing things.”
------------------------------

How awkward was this? Going to a crypt to find a vampire and tell him you might be in love with him. Only in Sunnydale. And only if you were a vampire slayer who forgot to read the handbook. She had almost decided not to come, but her time in the other world had taught her that being afraid of love was pointless. So even if he was dead and didn’t have soul, he could still be a good guy right? Buffy had convinced herself that maybe he could, and that none of that other stuff mattered. She would tell him how she felt.

She approached the crypt door and reached her hand up to knock. What if he wasn’t home? What if he was home and didn’t want to see her? What if…

Before she had time to finish her thought the door to the crypt opened and she was met by a slightly confused vampire. Of course he would know she was there.

“Buffy…” he said.

“Spike,” she replied putting her knocking hand down.

“Is there something I can do for you?” He sounded casual, like nothing was bothering him. Although on the inside he was a whole mix of emotion. Happiness, anger, confusion, hopefulness, love…He hadn’t seen her since she’d woken up. He had considered dropping by, but figured she wouldn’t want to see him.

“Umm…I was hoping we could talk.” He studied her for a moment before stepping aside to let her in. He shut the door behind him and stood waiting for her to make the next move. She turned around to face him, and he noticed that she was playing with her hands. He wondered what this was all about. When she didn’t say anything, he decided to get something off of his mind. Something that could very well explain why she was here.

“I’m sorry…for trying to pressure you into telling them about us. I guess I thought if they knew and didn’t care then neither would you.” She seemed surprised at his words, and she was. She hadn’t expected him to say anything. At least not before she’d said what she had come to say.

“It’s okay. And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry too.” Off of his look she added, “I’ve treated you worse than I’ve ever treated anyone and yet you’re the one who stayed.”

“When you love someone, you don’t just walk away.”

“Tell that to Angel and Riley.” It was true. Out of all of the men she’d ever been in a relationship with, Spike had been the only one to stick around, even when she told him constantly that he meant nothing to her and never would. But now he did, and she’d be damned if she was gonna let him leave too.

“Well Peaches is known for it. Really luv, you should have talked to Darla first.” Buffy made a face as she thought about Julie. She really had been a nice person and that made her wonder if under different circumstances Darla could have been as well. “And as for Captain Cardboard, I could have told you that wouldn’t last. He was too…normal for you.”

“Normal? What if normal is what I need in this crazy life I live?” He sighed and walked over to where his coat was laying and pulled the cigarette pack out of his pocket.

“Keep lookin’ for normal on the hellmouth you’re gonna come up empty pet.” He opened the pack to find it empty and threw it down on the sarcophagus. He had a point there. But then again, hadn’t she decided just a few minutes ago that she was going confess her feelings for him…a vampire. That was definitely not normal. And she was okay with that…right? Right. The question was how was she going to work that into the conversation?

“I think I might love you.” Well that was one way to do it. She bit her lip and waited for a response.

Spike blinked not trusting his ears. It sounded like she’d just said she thought she loved him, but that couldn’t have been it. This was Buffy, and last time he checked Buffy hated him.

“You’re gonna have to run that one by me again luv.”

“I said…I think I love you. I mean I don’t know for sure…and I could be wrong and maybe it’s all in my head but…if I do, then I don’t wanna pretend anymore.” He cocked his head sideways and studied her, trying to decide if he believed that or not. Maybe that demon really had done something to her.

“Spike? I just confessed my feelings…now would be the time to say something.”

“Are you off your rocker?” Well that wasn’t exactly what she had wanted him to say.

“What?”

“Who are you and what have you done with Buffy?” Oh. Now she understood. He didn’t believe her. Probably thought she was under a spell or something. And why would he have any reason to think otherwise?

“Spike. This is me. I know it seems crazy, and maybe it is, but…I don’t care anymore. I’ve missed out on so much being afraid and worrying about what other people think. Except you. I wish I knew what you were thinking right now.” She sounded hopeful and that puzzled Spike even more. Was this really Buffy? And did she really want to be with him?

“I’m not sure I know what to think. You’re throwing me for a bit of a loop here slayer. I mean last time I saw you, you didn’t want anything to do with me or my feelings and now you’re telling me you think you love me…”

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to confuse you. I know this is all a little much. But to be honest with you Spike, I think I had these feelings all along and I was just too afraid to admit it to myself.”

“And now you’re not?” he asked and she shook her head no. “And why’s that then?”

“Because it’s pointless to be afraid. People waste so much of their lives being unhappy because they’re scared to take chances. I don’t want to be like that anymore.”

“So you’re serious about this?”

“Yes.”

“And you wanna be with me? For real be with me…not just shagging in your spare time?” She took a step closer to him.

“For real. Although the shagging part doesn’t sound so bad either.” He smirked at her as she stepped close to him and leaned up placing a kiss on his lips. He returned it with eagerness, though still unsure of the situation.

After a moment he pulled away and looked at her.

“So when did you come to this revelation?”

“When I was out. You know I…I kept seeing you. You would appear and tell me that the world I was living in wasn’t real. I thought I was losing my mind, but I guess it was my subconscious trying to tell me where I was wasn’t where I should be.”

“So what does all this mean?” He needed definite clarification.

“It means that…I’m willing to give us another chance. If…you promise not to be an asshole anymore.”

“I don’t know that I can promise you that slayer. It’s kind of a personality trait.” She smiled and shook her head.

“Well as long as you try.”

“I can do that.” He didn’t know exactly what that coma had done to her, but he wasn’t gonna complain. She leaned up and kissed him again, this time wrapping her arms around his neck. When she pulled back to breathe he decided to ask one more question.

“What about wanting to be normal?” Buffy smiled before replying.

“I thought about it and…normal…is highly over-rated.”

THE END