god...the pain you manage to infuse the characters with is just palpable. Like you could reach out and touch it.

I have to say if I were Buffy, i'd have done the exact same thing. And good for her for going out to dinner. If anyone deserves some downtime she does!!!

>Author's Response: I don't think of him as the epitome of dirtiness >either actually.

Well, I'm glad i spent a good amount of time putting my thoughts together to a writer i admire for you to simply contradict half of one sentence and then completely dispense with the rest of my review.

Author's Response: I apologize if it came across as my being rude. I didn't mean for it to come out that way. I wasn't exaclty sure how to respond to the rest of the review without giving it away what will be coming up. I suppose I could have said that....but I thought that maybe the work I've done for later chapters would be a response to what you had discussed in your review

Spike isn't a very likable character right now, and I can understand how some may not like this story because of its emotional, angsty content. Personally, I would take that as a compliment and rise to the challenge to win over those that dislike the story (not that you should feel the need to win anyone over). My opinion with art has always been that I would rather have someone really love or really hate my work rather than be indifferent to it. So the fact that you are evoking great emotional responses and strong opinons should be taken as a sign of a job well done. BTW, I really like this story and look forward to reading more.

Author's Response: Thank you :)

Good for Buffy. If she would have stayed at Spike's after that little temper tantrum, I'd have been pissed because then she'd just be a doormat. She's visiting him -- on vacation -- and he says he "changed his life for her". Wow, sorry for the TWO WEEK inconvenience!! I mean, he BEGGED her to come visit!! What a wanker. I can kind of see why other people are saying they don't want to see Buffy with this Spike, because he's obviously an ass who needs YEARS of therapy rather than a single "eureka" moment.

Okay, don't know whether to like this chapter or just be plane frustrated at it. I like that Spike finally had the truw moment of self-disgust that it usually takes for someone to change their destructive behavior for the better. But...damn I hate that Angel is there when Buffy is hurting over Spike. ARGH! I know it's necessary for the 'angst' but DAMMIT! LOL! Oh well...sign of good writing that it makes ya love it & hate it at the same time. So...ultimately...great chapter. Looking forward to similar future love/hate as you weave your tale. LOL!

Love the story. Looking forward to Spike opening his eyes and getting what he deserves. More please.

Ohhhh.....interesting. Can't wait for more!

So, Mother Nature dumped a foot and a half of snow on me (gotta love Long Island during a Nor'Easter) and I was so excited to see a new chapter to read! Spike is starting to get the view of his life that he never wanted. And yes, Buffy is getting preachy, but she told him that she didn't want to come out and change his lifestyle for her. And then he throws it in her face.

Now, I know that Angel is a necessary evil, but lets not leave him in too long cause there is only so much of the "poof" that I can handle. Can't wait to see Spike come home and find it empty. Is Buffy going back home, or is she gonna stick it out in California to at least have dinner with Sam and Alicia? So many questions on my mind.

Thanks for the quick upsates and if you want to make a snow-bound, cabin-fevered girl very happy, there would be more soon!

Oh, good twist. After all, what's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander.

Or something like that, anyway.

Someone had mentioned in an earlier review about Spike being made "evil" compared to all these perfect women whom he doesen't deserve.

I think that is part of why I have become un-easy with this story, because while Spike has made big mistakes, and don't think I believe he should have it easy by any means, but so far all that has happened is people are talking AT him and not TO him. Buffy being the biggest one...she was hurt by him big time as a friend, I would be too, and she has valid reason to think the things she does about him, but she has wanted to help him see things differently and so far she has done nothing to achieve that. (Though I know it's only been like one day) She calls him a coward for running and she has done the same thing, double so because she is going out with Angel that evening as well, doing almost the exact same thing she excused Spike of doing when he wanted to go out.

Now let me get to Spike, I do think he is acting like a child and an ass. He gets mad because he had to change is life around to get her up there, when she is the one that pointed that out from the beginning and he said he didn't care. So he's an ass and a hypocrite. Then, when he says he wants to spend time with her, the first thing he does when they have time alone together is bolt to a bar, where she logically believes he will find someone to screw, I would have believed the same thing and it's boggling to think he is actually surprised and upset that she made that statement. Considering what he did the first night she was there.

But now he has actually had that mini-apiphiny and is hopefully going home, it'll be a rude ass awakening when he gets there and he will have no one to blame but himself. He claims he loves her, but he's too selfish to love her as a friend should.

Despite what sounds like a flame, I do like this story and probably no matter how un-easy I may get about it, I will continue on because I have to know how things will happen. I'm a sucker that way. :)

Author's Response: You are right on a lot of what you said. I can only say Trust me. I'm a few chapters ahead of what's written so ..yeah, trust me :) Right now everyone's just reacting and not necessarily thinking a lot of things through ... the way it sometimes happens in life...and then there's a moment when that gets old and you just stop. You'll see :)

Gah... Gigantic Angst ahead. Proceed with caution. *LOL*

The name Angel is synonymous with trouble. At least, more than half the time. ;)

""Buffy doesn't believe him to be a horrible person though. She wouldn't have became friends with him if he was. She knows he's a good person, just doesn't make the best choices in his life and thinks that his quality of life could be better if he made some better choices. A lot will be revealed as the chapters go on. There's a story there for he and Sam that Buffy doesn't know all about...but will soon. It's all about a journey of self-discovery, basically.""

Yeah, I get that. I guess what I was trying to say was just that I wish things were a little more balanced. I wish Buffy wasn't so perfect. I wish you didn't have to make Spike a crappy dad on top of everything else. It's just not fun seeing Spike being preached to by woman after woman, chapter after chapter. I'm glad to hear that Buffy will realize it's not as simple as Spike bad/Sam good though. The whole deadbeat dad thing is just really hard to deal with here.

Author's Response: They will be :) Trust me? Things do seem bad right now, but I guess I'm trying to get across -- and maybe not well-- that when emotions are high things are kind of wonky and get blown out of proportion--or MORE proportion. Know what I mean? And Buffy is aware of her feelings for Spike. Whether she wants to come clean to him on them just yet is a different story. Some things are about to shift soon. :)

Good for
Buffy! I'm so proud of her right now.

I'm not exactly thrilled about Angel being 'the guy' from the plane, but oh well. It had to be some 'body' right?

This was wonderful, and let Spike get jealous; upset and hurt for once. He deserves it, the rough wake-up call he's about to get.

Rinnnggg....Spike, you're an ass!

spuf