The story itself is interesting but it's a little hard to read due to the formatting and I got lost a couple of times. I finally had to copy the story and fix the formatting problem myself to follow the work.

May I suggest breaking it up a bit into paragraphs, sections, conversations, ect?

I will be watching for the second part to see how this idea is going to evolve =) but it's nice to see Spike getting a little well earned recognition for what he's trying to become.