Chapter 2
Sitting in the window of The Espresso Pump Café, Anya toyed with the froth on her cappuccino with a spoon, while she waited for her friend Halfrek.
“Come on Hallie…I haven’t got all day!” Anya muttered, looking at her watch, for the fifth time. She was ten minutes late and counting.
“Here I am, darling!” With a theatrical sweep of the arms, Hallie appeared, dressed as a belly dancer, complete with yashmak covering her mouth and nose, and tinkling bells on the edges of her many scarves tied around her waist.
“Whoops!” She disappeared again, only to reappear a second later wearing normal jeans and a sweater.
“Sorry about that sweetie, D’Hoffran has got his Ali-Baba freak on again!”
The guy sitting in the corner stared round eyed, he could have SWORN that the girl just appeared out of thin air dressed like a belly dancer…he looked into his skinny latte, and wondered just what the hell was in it…
She ordered a chocolate malt milkshake and sat next to her friend.
“So, how are things going?”
Anya sighed and said,
“Still complicated…but at least we don’t have seating arrangements to sort…I was thinking of a theme for my wedding, but (shrug) I can’t make my mind up”
“Oh, theme eh…how about…the slaughter of the Innocents? – Or um, erm…the St Valentine’s Day massacre?”
“Hallie – wedding, huh – happy time!”
“They WERE happy times!”
Anya sighed again and said
“I’ve got to wear something old”
“When?”
“For the wedding.”
“Something…old? Who says?” Halfrek looked puzzled
“Buffy! She says it’s for good luck. Something old, and something new” Anya explained. Halfrek frowned
“Something old, and something new? – I don’t-“
“And borrowed, and um…blue, yeah, that’s it, blue” Still looking puzzled Hallie said,
“Well, what colour is your dress?”
“Ivory”
“Underwear?”
“Same”
“Buffy says it’s traditional”
“I see. You haven’t gone with our traditions then. No blood lava and burlap”
Anya shook her head. Halfrek smiled and then she asked,
“What does Xander think about the naked self-flagellation and the goat sacrifice on the burning altar?”
“Um…about that” Anya began, but she wouldn’t meet Halfrek’s gaze, instead she nervously twisted her engagement ring around her finger, while she bit her bottom lip.
“Well?” Halfrek drained her chocolate malt with a slurpy straw noise, whilst looking at her friend expectantly.
Anya looked pained, and then she quietly said,
“We um… we can’t do it”
“What – But why not?” Halfrek looked incredulous
“Buffy says we can’t” Anya explained
“Anya! First no blood lava and burlap, now no burning altar sacrifice why not – it’s not too much to ask to have some of YOUR traditions!”
“Xander just wants us to go there, pick a chapel, get married and that’s it”
“That’s it? What do you mean that’s it – what about the 100 day party afterwards, the jesters, the tumbling acrobats, the dwarf throwing, the naked troll mud wrestling…”
Anya shook her head and said,
“I’d have to have a hen night though.” Anya said
“Who said?”
“Buffy”
“Hen night? – Ooh, Sacrifice?” Hallie’s eyes lit up.
“No. Nothing to do with slaughtering chickens, but it does involve us drinking large amounts of alcohol, and watching men with unfeasibly large muscles taking off their clothes while we shout at them”
“I see. Doesn’t sound much fun to me just shouting at them…aren’t we allowed to-”
“No!”
“But just a little debauchery wouldn’t hurt!”
“No. Coz then Xander would want the same”
“With male strippers?” Hallie looked horrified at this thought, and Anya frowned
“No silly, with female ones!”
“And you wouldn’t let-“
“No way José!”
“Who has he got for his Best Man?”
“Spike”
“Oh William! God he’s SO gorgeous! Well he is now…now he’s got rid of the glasses and sideburns and curly hair!”
“Huh?”
“Oh…nothing…we go W-A-Y back is all – so! I thought your Xander didn’t like him”
“He doesn’t. Well, he says he doesn’t, but secretly I know he admires him”
“So lets just recap…no vengeance demon traditions, only really stupid sounding human ones”
“That’s about it!”
“Well, count me out sweetie, I’ll probably be causing chaos at hell-gate 5 anyway!”
“Razor’s lot of Hellions?”
With a huge grin Halfrek said,
“You got it! – Should be tons of fun, his lot have been spoiling for a couple of centuries against the Maharmos demons
“I know, I know, don’t rub it in!”
“You could join us!”
“Hallie! I’m getting married, and well, I’m human now!”
“Well be boring then, by-se-bye sweetie – and TRY and have fun!” She swept up her arms and left.
The guy opposite nearly fell off his seat and again wondered just what the hell they put in their coffee here…
Anya sighed and picked up her purse and left the café.
**********
“Oh god, we’ve got to say something and quick!” Willow was pacing up and down in Buffy’s lounge.
“We could draw straws to tell her!”
“Or, we could put it to Xander, and HE could tell her!” Buffy said and they both brightened at the prospect, then their shoulder’s sagged again
“That’s not really fair, is it?”
“No, I suppose not – look, why don’t we tell her what Spike said yesterday?”
“What, about not being able to afford it – well its true…oh god, that could be her now!”
“Buffy – Willow – Hi!”
“C-come in Anya…so, did you see your friend?”
“Hallie? – Yeah, she’s not coming, too boring for her”
Buffy and Willow exchanged looks, and Buffy took her courage and was just about to say how they couldn’t afford the outfits when Anya piped up,
“It’s going to be boring – the happiest day of my life, and it’s going to be a washout!”
Spike came in through the back door and walked into the lounge.
“Blimey, who’s died?”
“What?” Buffy asked frowning
“Why all the glum faces?”
“Hallie won’t come to the wedding, it’s going to be-“
“Great!”
“What?”
“Look, I’ve been on the Internet, we can go down the night before, go to Billy and Johnny’s all you can eat Bar-be-cue shack, then the ‘Lucky Strike Casino’ will provide a wedding cake, and a few chicken drumsticks on production of a wedding certificate – and they throw in a bottle of champagne too – so that’s the reception sorted, then we can go to one of the nightclubs and boogie the night away – and as for a hen and stag night, we can go Bronzing tonight!”
Buffy and Willow looked hopefully at Anya.
“Really? – But what about outfits?”
“We can hire them – anything from Star Trek to Elvis!” Xander said grinning entering the lounge.
“Steady on whelp, they do ordinary stuff too, even wedding dresses – if you want to look like a meringue that is!”
All eyes were on Anya.
“No”
“No? – What do you mean, no – tell me one god-damn thing wrong with it?” Spike groused, and looking at Spike, Xander nodded
“Um, yeah…what?”
“The dress – I want my own – you lot can wear what you like, but I want my own dress”
“Oh is that all – I thought you meant no to all of it!” Spike said
“No, I think the rest of it’s a great idea!”
Everybody grinned
“Can you just imagine me, dressed in the full regalia of a Klingon warrior!” Xander tried to stand with a macho stance.
Spike arched a brow.
Anya frowned and said,
“Xander Harris, what is it with you and bloody Star Trek, huh? I mean when you make me put on Spock’s ears and say ‘Beam me up Scotty’ when we play dress up sex is bad enough!”
Willow had her deer-caught-in-the-headlights look, Buffy was round eyed and Spike had to go into the kitchen to try and not collapse in a fit of giggles, but he didn’t succeed, and lay all over the counter helplessly laughing.
“Anya! Over-sharing, what have I told you!”
Diplomatically Buffy and Willow dashed into the kitchen, both trying to squash through the door at the same time to see Spike, his shoulder’s shaking with mirth and him slowly and quietly banging his head on the breakfast counter.
Buffy snorted and giggle and Willow clamped her hand over her mouth
“Oh god, oh god…that’s so pervy!” Spike whispered between giggles.
“Buffy, Buffy – we’re going now” Xander called
“Right- okay…see you!” Buffy TRIED to sound normal…
“What time tonight?” Anya asked
“Nine” Buffy squeaked
“Okay, by then!”
“Honestly, Anya, what were you think-“ The front door shut and Buffy Spike and Willow collapsed laughing.
“Oh gods, can you just imagine it?”
“I SO don’t want to go there!” Buffy said, her face red from laughing.
“I don’t know though…the Star Trek theme mightn’t be all bad…remember that episode with Spock’s mother, didn’t she have to be completely naked? – OW!”
Buffy popped him one on the arm.
“What was that for?” Spike frowned and rubbed his arm.
“What do you think? – Come on, let’s go sort what I’m wearing tonight!”
[Reviews - 51]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | 
Chapter or Story
Has been viewed 3511 times
- Text Size +
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | Chapter or Story - Text Size +