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Disclaimer: The characters in ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ are the property of Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Productions, Inc. We do own them and are not receiving any monetary compensation for the writing of this fanfic. It’s being written for our own pleasure and hopefully for the amusement of our fans, who we love dearly.

Rating: PG-13. Actually there’s nothing really graphic in this chapter, just a minor allusion to deviant sex acts, which unfortunately for you all, we’re not going into just yet .


Feedback: Also, if you want to correspond with us directly, please send any e-mail to BuffySpikeShiper@aol.com




Chapter 8


Sleeping With the Enemy


Part Two


Written by Phil




****


"Buffy, are you still there? "Giles asked her a moment or two later.

"Yeah, I am." She replied. "What did you want to talk about?"

"You, of course. How are you?"

"Uh, you asked me this already. I told you."

"No", he said somewhat crossly. "What you did was give me a list of everything that is going wrong in Sunnydale and I can assure you that I’d just as soon remain ignorant on that subject. What I want to know is how you are. How you’re getting on?"

"Gee, now’s a really peachy time to be asking that. It would have been a lot more timely if you had asked me that, say…before you left." As soon as the words were out of her mouth she wished she could take them back. It was a completely unfair accusation to make. On the other hand, it was how she felt.

"Buffy," and this time she knew she could hear him taking his glasses off. "Please sit down."

The tone in his voice suggested that asking him how he knew she wasn’t already sitting was probably not her best possible move so she sat.

"So," he repeated "How are you?"

She sighed deeply. "I don’t know, Giles. I really don’t anymore. Just when I think I have a handle on things, something else jumps out at me and everything goes haywire again. It’s like living on a giant emotional roller coaster and what’s worse? It never goes away. Every day just seems to get more and more confusing and frustrating…"

"How so?" He asked gently.

"Well, I mean, first you leave, which, okay, I wasn’t exactly thrilled with, but hey I was dealing, I guess. Then there’s the whole Willow mess, Dawn keeps wavering between trying to be a perfect kid sister and be a total pain in my butt, and on top of it all, I’ve got this psycho vampire bitch who likes to play with guns shooting my house up. But you want to know the worst part? Everybody keeps looking to me to figure out questions that I can barely understand, let alone answer. Sometimes it’s all I can do from screaming at them to leave me the Hell alone and go get their own lives. So you tell me, Giles. What am I supposed to do?"

Buffy hadn’t realized until that moment just how bitterly angry, lonely and frustrated she had been. Now that she thought about it though, yeah she really wished they would all go take a flying leap into the Pacific Ocean sometimes. They all seemed to need or want something from her and there was too much pressure to please them all and do the job she needed to do. It wasn’t just Dawn’s constant need to be mothered, although that remained her primary concern. Everyone wanted her to take the lead in ‘fixing’ Willow, but they all insisted on challenging her at every turn. Xander and Anya were beginning to really annoy her lately, and while she could understand Tara’s confusion, a part of her wished that the witch had been more supportive of her when Xander had challenged her about Willow. On top of all that there was always her relationship with Spike, if you could call it that. Oh, God I so don’t want to think about him right now.

"Buffy," Giles’ voice cut back into her thoughts. "I was being quite serious earlier. If you need me to be there, I’ll catch the first flight out of Heathrow. I could be in California in about a day or so."

That brought her up short. "What…Do you really mean that? Does that mean you’re done over there?"

There was a long pause. "Well, not exactly. I have managed to discover what happened to Sir Robert and we’ve managed to avert a major crisis within the council, but there needs to be considerable work done before things are truly right again. I’m afraid it’s all a terrible mess here, Buffy. That's all beside the point however. If you feel that I'm absolutely needed there, I will come back and help out. Do you need me there, Buffy?"

It was all she could do to keep from screaming: Of course I need you, you jerk! I've needed you since the moment you left me. She'd been waiting him to make this offer for months. The one thing she wanted more than anything else was for him to fly right back, hold her hand, and tell her everything was going to be all right. It's what he did. It's what he had always done for her, since they had first met. And yet, even as she readied herself to leap on his offer and plead with him to come back and take all of this weight off of her shoulders, she found herself hesitating.

This was really the first time she had ever been left alone in charge. After her mother had died, she’d had a lot of responsibility dumped on her but she’d had been able to lean on Giles and Willow during those last frantic weeks fighting against Glory. Now, Giles was gone and Willow was the problem and everyone was counting on her to make the right decisions and at the same time complaining when she did something they didn’t agree with. It was frustrating, annoying, and totally unfair. It was also the first time she had ever really felt like an adult, and as terrible as that feeling often was, it also made her feel more, well…complete.

So now she had a decision to make. The first choice was the safest. Tell Giles she needed him, have him drop the important work he was doing in England, and then sit back and let him shoulder most of the responsibility for dealing with Willow. She’d do most of the grunt work of course, but at the end of the day, she’d be relying on his judgement and his ability to make things seem less complicated. Or she could do what her mother had after the divorce. Take charge, make the decisions and deal with the consequences and the second-guessing that came with it. This was what she had feared all along, even before her ‘death.’ But…

You’re not a little girl anymore, she heard a voice in the back of her mind. You’re a woman now. Act like it. Well, she’d known this day was going to come eventually and like they said, why put off til tomorrow what you can do today. Well, okay it was a really lame way of putting it, but it was still true. Taking a deep breath, she made her decision.

"It’s okay, Giles. Really. I’ve got it covered this time, I think," she told him.

"You’re positive?" He sounded surprised, and just a little bit relieved. She wasn’t sure about how to take that.

"I’m sure," she said firmly. "The way I see it, I’m kind of the head of the family these days. I should probably start acting like it. You pretty much told me that after…after Mom died. I guess it’s just starting to sink in now."

"Buffy, I really don’t know what to say." She was certain she thought she could actually hear him start to tear up. "I mean, yes I do, actually. I’ve told you this before but I am immensely proud of you. Now, more so than ever."

"Gee, thanks dad," she replied wistfully. It did mean a lot to her though. Giles’ opinion of her always had. She continued just a little more softly. "We’ll be fine. No matter how far gone everybody thinks Willow is, she’s still Willow. I’ll...make that we’ll, get through to her and everything will be fine; just in time for Christmas. Uh, you’ll be able to make it back by then, won’t you?"

"Well, we’ll have to see, Buffy," her watcher replied. "I certainly hope so, at least for a week or two. In the meantime, is everything else under control? No problems?"

"Such as?"

"Umm, nothing in particular I suppose. I take it that Spike’s, umm feelings, haven’t been a concern?"

Buffy paused for a moment, trying to get her breath back and thanking her lucky stars that Giles couldn’t see the expression on her face, which she assumed made her look like a complete moron.

"Uh, yeah. Fine. No problems. Got it completely under control. You’ve got absolutely nothing to worry about there." Okay, end of conversation now, please.

Thankfully, Giles didn’t seem to want to press the conversation in Spike’s direction any further. "Good. I suppose I should let you get back to your research. You’ll keep me informed, if you need my help though. The offer is still open, you know."

Buffy smiled to herself. "I know it is, Giles and I appreciate it. I really do. I’ll have Anya give you a call once we find out exactly what’s going on here and give you all the juicy details, okay?"

That seemed to satisfy him. " Well, then. Good luck and good hunting. Give everyone my best. And, Buffy, do take care of yourself."

"I will. Bye Giles." With that, the phone clicked off. He had hung up.

That didn’t go too badly, she thought, at about the same time she felt her knees starting to buckle. Damn, why do I feel so exhausted after a lousy phone call? Feeling a sudden need for some fresh air, she walked to the back door of the training room that led out to the alley behind the Magic Box.

It was a typically beautiful California evening in December. Clear and cool, but certainly not cold. Taking a deep breath, she felt the air rushing into her lungs, calming and steadying her for the long night’s work ahead. As she stood there, staring at the stars and contemplating her next move, she suddenly became aware of the combined smells of burning tar and tobacco.

"Hello pet, " a very familiar voice said behind her. "Out taking an evening stroll?"




*****

"Hello, Spike," she said carefully, turning to face the vampire who had taken her totally by surprise. "What are you doing here?" Of course, she knew the answer to that one, but hey, what else was she going to say? It was obvious that he wanted to talk, and what he wanted to talk about.

"Out of cigarettes. Figured I could bum one off of one of the Scoobies. They’re usually gullible enough," he stated breezily. Underneath it though she could sense uneasiness in his voice. God, am I starting to know him that well?

"Right, because the fact that none of them even smoke never occurred to you?" she replied shortly.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "Is that so? One less reason to bother with them, I suppose." With that, he reached into his pocket and dug out a near empty package of cigarettes. Removing the last one and lighting it in a single fluid movement, he brought it to his lips and took a pull.

Buffy felt her blood begin to do a slow boil, whether out of frustration, annoyance or plan old down and dirty lust, she really couldn’t tell. All she knew was she didn’t have any time for distractions, and when it came down to it, there wasn’t anything more distracting than Spike.

"What do you want, Spike?" She finally asked in a weary voice. There, it was out. The lead in question to a series of answers she knew she wasn’t ready to hear. Not now. Not here.

"I dunno, luv. What does any vampire want? Nice, cozy tomb with a view. Hot and cold running blood on tap."

"I don’t have time for this," she snapped at him and turned towards the doorway.

"Buffy…wait."

Even though she knew better, Buffy found herself turning around to face him again. I guess I owe him this much, she thought.

"You weren’t there when I woke up this morning," he said tentatively. If she hadn’t known better she’d have thought that he sounded exactly like a teenaged boy asking for his first date. "I was hoping that we could have talked a bit. You know, about…things."

Oh God, the morning after talk. The one that only girls are supposed to want. "Spike, this really isn’t the time for this. We’ve got a serious situation here."

He chuckled at that. "Oh, I’d say that was putting it mildly, Slayer. What I want to know is what we’re going to do about it. In the future, that is."

"Future? What future?"

"What are you purposely trying to be daft, girl? I’m talking about our future together. You and me. You know…us." The hope in his voice was almost tangible and it pained her a lot more than she would have thought or cared to admit.

"Spike,’ she began as gently as she could "There is no us. There never will be. Last night, was…last night, and there’s nothing more to be said. It’s done."

"Just like that?" The vampire asked incredulously. "One minute you’re telling me to hold on to you forever and the next it’s ‘wham, blur, thank you sir? Sorry pet, but I don’t accept that."

"You’re going to have to accept it Spike, because that’s the way it is. I’m not going to take back last night. It happened, and it was…special to me. I do want you to know that." She paused as the memories began to creep back, threatening to break her resolve. "But it’s not going go any further than it has already. It’s over Spike. I don’t want to hurt you, I really don’t, but this, this thing between us can’t happen anymore. It shouldn’t have happened in the first place."

"Why? Why do you keep pushing me away when we both know you want this as much as I do." The panic in his voice reminded her of their conversation in her kitchen all those weeks ago. God, so much had changed since then between them and at the same time she knew it really hadn’t.

"Maybe, I do," she replied quietly. "But we also both know that I’m the Slayer. I can’t be involved with you because… because it’s wrong; and that’s something we both know too. Just because you can ignore that fact, it doesn’t mean I can."

"Right," he snapped back at her. "Because I’m a monster and I don’t know right from wrong." The desperation in his voice was giving way to anger.

"Look, Spike. It’s more complicated than that. It’s…"

"Save it, Slayer. It’s really not complicated at all. In fact, it’s bloody simple. I’ll admit it’s taken a while to sink into my noggin, what with you changing your mind every minute, but I guess it’s about time that I faced the truth about you."

"What truth?" She asked him, growing more irritated the longer the conversation continued.

"You’re afraid. You’re afraid to be with me because if you were, then you’d run the risk of actually being happy for once in your life, and we couldn’t have that now, could we?"

Buffy scowled at him."Oh, great. More Buffy psychoanalysis from the undead guy. You know what, Dr. Spock? Just save it. I’ve got a job to do here, in case you hadn’t noticed. In fact, I’m right in the middle of figuring out what’s going on with Willow so the last thing I need is an argument with you about how screwed up I am."

That brought him up short. "What’s that about Willow?"

"Oh, that’s right. You haven’t heard," she told him. "We think that Willow’s lit professor, you know that Crispin guy, is some kind of warlock. Giles and Tara think he may be casting a mind control spell or something on her."

"Might explain a few things, I suppose," Spike responded, sounding thoughtful for a change. "Can’t say as I’m surprised, though. I’ve thought there was something off about that bog trotting Irish prat since he came into the picture. So, you’ve been in contact with old Rupert, eh?"

She nodded, rather grateful to have had the previous topic of conversation dropped.

"Tell him about our little shagfest last night did you?" When she just glared at him, he smiled wanly. "Thought not." He shrugged. "Well, it’s not like I didn’t see this coming, is it?" He added bitterly.

Although she remained adamant about ending their relationship, if that’s what you wanted to call it, there was a fairly decent sized chunk of her that regretted the necessity of it. If she was truthful with herself, she had to admit that he had already become a much bigger part of her life than she ever could have imagined when she had first met him. She’d known that it wouldn’t be easy, but she’d never thought it would hurt this damned much.

Any further contemplation of her extremely messy and overcomplicated love life was interrupted by the sound of the back door to the Magic Box opening. Buffy turned to see her sister’s head pop out of the doorway.

"Hey, Buffy. Who’re you talking to?" Dawn asked.

"What? I was talking to…"She managed to get out as she turned back into the alley, only to find that she was now the only one in it. Buffy experienced a brief feeling of longing and abandonment as she realized that the vampire had vanished, but she shook it off. After all, it was probably for the best.

"No one," she told the girl. "I was just out getting some fresh air. What’s up?"

"Xander told me to get you. He said he’s found something you should see."

"Yeah, okay," Buffy replied. "It’s getting chilly out here anyway."

With that, the two young women headed back into the warmth and safety of the building, neither one of them giving the now abandoned alleyway so much as a backwards glance.



******

Buffy found the others in the front part of the building, Xander and Anya each hunched over a small pile of reference books and Tara standing over Xander’s shoulder.

"What’ve you got, guys?" she asked, actually somewhat grateful to have her mind back on the problem at hand.

"I’m not sure yet, Buff," he replied. "There wasn’t too much in that book Giles told us about but I did get the names of some other sources. This one is about legends of Irish magicians in the 18th and 19th centuries."

"I guess I must have missed that one when I was in college," Buffy said wryly. "Is there anything in there we can use?"

"Well," Tara broke in. "There is something in this chapter about an Irish priest who was accused of practicing witchcraft in 1748. Uh, let’s see. Father Patrick Duffy of Templecrone, county Donegal was reputed to be casting ‘dark magicks’ affecting the minds of young women in the parish, causing them to have grave discourse with the devil…"

"Gotta love those catholic school girls." Xander jumped in. "I think the girls at Sunnydale High would only go as far as to have grave discourse with the swim team, which, okay isn’t too far off. But I think Tara may have something," he added, quickly getting back on point after the withering looks he got from the four females in the room.

"Yeah, that kind of sounds like our guy." Buffy agreed. "Do we have any idea what this Father what’shisname looked like?"

Xander shook his head. "Not in this one. We’ve still got a couple of these books to go through though. It may take a while, Buffy."

"We don’t have a while, Xander. Willow’s in trouble now, " Buffy told him, perhaps a bit more strongly than she would under normal conditions. The sense of impending doom she’d had all day was rising though, and it was becoming more difficult to get a lid on it. Still, she was the Slayer and it was her job to stay calm, even in times like these. Especially in times like these. "It’s okay," she went on a little more calmly. "I know you guys are doing your best. We just have to focus and figure this out."

"We’re trying, Buffy. Honestly." Anya pushed back a book that she had been searching through. "This isn’t easy work however, and Xander’s right. It’s going to take time, and well, to be perfectly blunt about it, it’s not like you have your nose in a book like the rest of us."

Before Buffy had time to compose a retort to the ex-vengeance demon’s barb, the bell to the front door rang and in walked Amy Madison. It has been a few weeks since Buffy had seen the witch-turned rat-turned witch again and the changes were noticeable. She looked tired and haggard, and above all…scared.

"Uh, hello Amy" she said, trying to get over her surprise as quickly as she could. "I’m sorry but the store’s closed right now. We’re kind of in the middle of something…"

The witch shook her head. "I’m not here on a shopping trip, Buffy. I need to talk to you. About Willow. It’s kind of urgent," she added nervously as Tara and Dawn joined them at the front of the store.

"Sure thing. Umm, you remember my sister, Dawn right? And don’t think you’ve met Tara. "

"Ahh, not officially," Amy said, apparently dropping her guard ever so slightly. "I’ve seen you around. And oh, hey Dawn. Jeez, you got big, didn’t you?"

"Yeah, anyway you wanted to talk about Willow?" Buffy wasn’t particularly interested in keeping the small talk going right now. "Did she send you. Does she know you’re here?"

"God, I hope not." Amy regained the frightened expression that had started to slip a moment ago. "She’d probably skin me alive if she knew that I was here. And no, I’m not exaggerating," she added as she saw Buffy’s bemused expression. "She’s totally out her control, and I think she’s losing her mind."

Glancing briefly at Tara, Buffy took in the other woman’s concern. "Are you sure it’s that bad, Amy. I mean, we know something’s up with her, but I’m sure there’s a logical explanation for it." She stopped just short of telling her what they knew about Crispin. No point in tipping her hand just yet if Amy was acting as a spy for the others.

"Yes, it’s that bad," the witch responded in an exasperated voice. "Look Buffy, I know we haven’t been in touch lately, what with me being a rat for three years and all, and we were never really all that close but please trust me on this. I’m not the enemy here and I don’t think that underneath it all, Willow is either. I think it’s him." It wasn’t hard to notice that her voice had dropped almost to a whisper as she finished.

"Go on" Buffy told her. "Tell us."

Amy continued. "She was casting magic all the time. For everything. I told her she was using too much, but it was almost like she was addicted to it or something. When I tried to get him to help me stop her he just laughed and said it was none of my business and I ‘shouldn’t worry my pretty little head’ about it. Then, about two days ago she collapsed. Now, it’s almost like she’s in a trance most of the time. The only time that she ever snaps out of it is when he wants her to…"She stopped, blushing furiously.

Buffy, realizing what she meant and seeing the stricken look on Tara’s face turned to her sister. "Dawn, I need you to go help Xander and Anya, okay?"

Dawn started to say something and then seeing the looks on their faces, nodded grimly and obeyed the older girl’s command.

"H-how, how bad is it? "Tara asked, once Dawn had moved out of earshot.

Amy shot Buffy a questioning look and, on getting an affirmative nod from the Slayer, continued her story. "I can’t, I won’t go into too much detail. The things he says to her and makes her do. It’s…"She shuddered visibly. "They always send me to my room when they’re going to, you know, but I hear things and it’s killing her, Buffy. She never says anything when it’s over but I can tell. He’s destroying her, one piece at a time. And he’s enjoying it."

She was nearly on the verge of tears and she looked utterly alone. It was Tara, with tears already in her own eyes, who reached out to her first. Taking the other witch’s hands in her own, she said, "It’s okay, Amy. You’re with us now, with friends. Willow’s strong too. I don’t care how much power he’s got, underneath it all, she’s really strong. She’ll survive it. We just have to help her and be strong too. Okay?"

Buffy, marveling at how much courage her friend had shown by reaching out to somebody she barely knew in the middle of her own despair, was about to add her words of comfort when she caught the sound of Xander’s voice.

"Uh, guys, I think you need to see this."

Buffy turned and started walking towards the table, followed closely by Tara and Amy. "Do you have something? Do you know who he is?"

Anya pushed the book she had been reading towards her. "Yes, we think so.

"And?" Buffy asked, suddenly dreading the answer.

Xander sighed. "Put it this way. I think we’re gonna need a bigger boat."





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