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Chapter Four

After four days with no sign of the blond vampire, Buffy was having a hard time hiding the fear she felt for him from her Watcher and friends. Going through the days pretending to be glad she hadn’t seen him, that she was actually interested in the secret commando still trying to date her, that she wasn’t being eaten up with worry was turning her into a very cranky Slayer.

“Hey, Buffy. Wait up!” The cheerful shout from the TA leaving the cafeteria building was not what she wanted to hear just that minute. However, she remembered Giles’ admonition that she get to know the man and bring him around to meet her friends. She was under strict orders not to allow Riley to get her alone or to go anywhere with him without notifying her Watcher.

“Hey, Riley. How are you?” She tried to look genuinely interested in him and not suspicious.

“I’m good. You?”

“Couldn’t be better,” she chirped, flashing him her best cheerleader smile.

“I thought…I mean if you don’t have plans…would you like to get some coffee?”

(No. I’d like to find the annoying blond vampire that you were trying to capture the other night. And I’d like to know what you did you him and why.)

“Sure, Riley. That sounds like fun.”

An hour and a creamy latte later, they had agreed to meet that evening for dinner and then to join her friends at Giles’ apartment. As Buffy walked away to hurry to her next class, Riley watched her hair gleaming in the sunlight and shook his head at the idea that she was anything but an exceptionally pretty coed. Perhaps one that had studied martial arts for many years, he allowed, remembering the kick to his chest that had sent him to the ground. But, normal. Surely, normal. Not a demon. Or a Slayer. Whatever that was.

When Buffy got back to her dorm to dress for her date, she called Giles to let him know that she was bringing Riley by that evening to meet him. They agreed that they would say Giles was her uncle on her mother’s side of the family and that they were so close because he had been the librarian at her high school for years.

Buffy had finished what she had to say and was preparing to hang up when her Watcher cleared his throat.

“What is it, Giles?” Buffy asked with a sigh. She knew that sound. It meant she was going hear something she didn’t want to hear. In this case, contrary to what her Watcher believed, that was not true.

“Uh, Spike has returned, Buffy. He has not been very forthcoming about where he was, but he is back and taking up space on my couch even as we speak.”

Buffy’s joy at hearing that the vampire was not dusted or captured was immediately mitigated by the knowledge that Riley would recognize him the minute he saw him.

“He’s going to have to hide, Giles. I don’t want Riley to see him, or to wonder why we’re keeping a vampire in the bathroom.”

“Nor do I, Buffy. However, he is being quite stubborn about leaving here until he has seen you again.”

“I don’t have time for this now. Put the blond bloodsucker on the phone. Please,” she added into the chilly silence that greeted her demand. She rolled her eyes at the Brit and his insistence on good manners even in the midst of a crisis. She heard him give an aggrieved sniff before handing the phone to Spike.

“Slayer.” His voice gave no indication of his mood. He just waited patiently for her to explain why she wanted to speak to him.

“Spike.”

(Where have you been? I was worried sick. I thought you were…how could you do that to me?)

There was no response and she realized she wasn’t feeling anything from him. He was deliberately blocking his thoughts from her and she couldn’t tell if he was receiving hers or not.

“Fine,” she growled. “We’ll do it this way. You can NOT be there tonight when I bring Riley over. He’ll recognize you immediately.”

“No he won’t,” was the cryptic response. “The only person he’s going to meet is your long lost cousin from the old country. Come to visit with Uncle Rupert.”

“Spike…” she put as much threat and warning into her voice as she could, but she could tell he was going to ignore her.

(It’ll be alright, pet. Just want to get a sniff of the wanker and see if he’s who you think he is. He won’t know me. I promise.)

As quickly as he appeared in her head, he was gone before she could respond.

(He’s gonna have to teach me how to do that, damnit.)

“What if you recognize him and go all “grrrr” on me?”

“Not gonna happen, Slayer. I can control myself if I need to. Anyway, it’s not like I could do anything to him if I did let the demon out, now, is it?”

“I suppose not,” she agreed with a sigh. “All right. Tell Giles we’ll be by around 8:30.”

“That late?” he responded noncommittally.

“Yes, we’re going out to dinner first. And I need to get off the phone and get dressed or I’m going to be late for my da- to meet him.”

There was no response from the other end of the line until her Watcher got back and said, “Buffy?”

“Giles? Where did Spike go?”

“He threw the phone down and stomped into the kitchen. What’s going on?”

“Nothing. Nothing’s going on. He’s just behaving like a baby. I’ll see you guys later.”

After a nice dinner at one of Sunnydale’s better restaurants, and a couple of glasses of wine, Buffy had decided that Riley was a pretty nice guy and much more interesting than she had originally thought. (Of course, that was before I knew he had a secret identity.) she thought to herself ruefully.

Over dessert she tried to get some information from him about what he’d been doing since he left Iowa as a brand new college graduate. She noticed he was a little vague about his “worked for the government, until I decided to try grad school”, but she didn’t want to alarm him by appearing to be too curious. She reminded herself that he probably had no idea she had recognized him the other night and would not suspect that she was pumping him for information.

It was fairly obvious that he was very interested in learning more about her, questioning her about how long she’d lived in Sunnydale, what her hobbies were, and what she liked to do in the evenings. She could see that her equally vague answers were frustrating him when he tried to lead the conversation into the martial arts and he finally came right out and asked her if she’d ever studied them.

Buffy was tempted to answer, “No,” just to see him get more frustrated, but she realized that would seem too much like a lie after what the man had already seen, so she nodded and admitted that she’d studied some “basic self defense stuff. You know, the kinds of things a girls needs to know in this town.”

She didn’t elaborate about what she meant by “this town” and he didn’t pursue it, just nodded happily to himself as though she had given exactly the answer he wanted to hear. Then he led the conversation into another direction, beginning with a discussion of the latest horror movie and, somewhat transparently, into a discussion of vampires and the unlikelihood of their being real.

Buffy laughed, but with the sideways look that he would have gotten from any resident of Sunnydale not dwelling in a fantasy world. For her to have lived in the town for as long as she had without at least suspecting that vampires were real would raise a red flag immediately, so she went with a denial that was intended to be accepted, but not believed.

He accepted her laughing denial with good grace and they finished their dessert and prepared to leave for her Watcher’s apartment.

The closer they got to Giles’, the more nervous Buffy became about Spike. She couldn’t imagine how he was going to disguise himself enough that he wouldn’t be immediately recognized both as a “hostile” and as the specific hostile for which they were searching, She reminded herself that Riley would not have her Slayer senses to warn him that Spike was a vampire and she crossed her fingers that he had done something to hide his platinum hair.

She couldn’t’ resist sending him a quick thought as they approached the door, not really expecting him to be open to her, but hoping he might be listening for her. She was caught off guard when, before she could send a coherent thought, he was in her head offering soothing advice.

(Calm down, pet. You’re heart’s poundin’ like it used to when you knew you had to fight me.)

Buffy could feel the smirk in his voice and growled back at him, (I’m just worried about you, you dumbass. And my heart sooo did not pound when I had to fight you. I always knew I could beat you.)

(Must’ve been something else that made it pound so hard then? If it wasn’t fear, what was it then? Hmmmm?)

(Shut up, moron. We’re here and you’d better be invisible.)

(Close enough to, luv. You’ll see.)

Buffy shook off her trepidation and gave the puzzled Riley a dazzling smile as she opened the door to the apartment.

“We’re here,” she announced unnecessarily as she pushed the door in. “Here we are. At my uncle’s apartment. To meet my friends. And my relatives. And, could I sound any more nervous?”

“I think it’s cute,” Riley said, smiling at her. “And, it’s okay. I’m a little nervous too.”

He moved closer to her and put his arm around her shoulders to give her a little squeeze. He then froze as the sound of a snarl echoed through the small room and he glanced around quickly, for something to use as a weapon. He felt Buffy stop abruptly, her face a study in shock and disbelief. He quickly scanned the room, but found no sign of anything hostile and no one else who seemed concerned.

When it appeared that no one else was disturbed about the noise, except possible her uncle who was whispering urgently to a young, bookish looking man in the corner, he relaxed and decided it must have been his imagination. Willow stepped forward to greet him with a little wave and a “Hi, Riley,” opening up the introductions.

He assumed the older man was Buffy’s uncle, and was a little surprised by the cultured British accent, but Giles smoothly explained that her mother had come to the US with their parents at a very young age, while he was left in England to attend boarding school.

He vaguely remembered being introduced to Xander and Anya one evening in the Bronze, and saw that his recollection of them as ordinary, boring people was perfectly correct. He waited for the young man in the corner to come forward, and when he didn’t, he strode over to him and extended his hand. Ducking his head shyly, the man introduced himself as Buffy’s cousin, William. He had a similar accent to her Uncle’s, and Riley assumed he was his son or some close relation.

At first glance, the much shorter, slim young man appeared very unassuming, soft, light brown curls falling over his forehead, thin, old fashioned looking glasses on his nose, and a younger man’s version of the tweedy English clothing that Buffy’s uncle wore. However, when he took Riley’s hand to shake it, his grip was very firm, almost to the point of pain and the man found himself squeezing back in the age-old masculine “mine is bigger than yours” contest.

Just as it appeared they would both give up the appearance of a friendly handshake and begin to try to injure each other in earnest, the older man cleared his throat pointedly, and Buffy’s cousin relaxed his grip with a shrug and an apology.

“ My apologies, old man. I certainly didn’t intend for that to become a test of wills. I’ve been working on the firmness of my handshake as I’ve been accused of shaking hands like a woman, and I’ve yet to find that line between firm and too hard.”

The embarrassed looking young man peered up over his glasses and did his best to appear harmless and sorry. His other hand still clutched the book he’d been reading when they came in the door and Riley craned his neck to see what it was. When he caught the title, “Sonnets by Elizabeth Barrett Browning”, he laughed and relaxed.

“No problem, man. Although, I’ve got to tell you, that’s quite a grip you’ve got there. I can’t imagine anyone accusing you of shaking hands like a woman.”

Riley turned to walk back to Buffy only to find her standing just inside the door where she’d stopped when they came in. She was staring at her cousin with her mouth hanging open and an expression of profound disbelief on her face.

“Buffy? Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

Buffy continued to stare at her “cousin”, her mouth opening and closing as she tried to say something coherent. “Wha…ba…mumph….gack” was the extent of her verbal ability and Giles quickly stepped into the awkward silence that followed her attempt at speech.

“I believe Buffy is simply surprised to find William here. He popped in unexpectedly last night and I’ve had no opportunity to tell her about his arrival.”

“Oh,” Riley said dubiously. He looked at Buffy again, surprised to see that she had shut her mouth and tilted her head as though listening to something he couldn’t hear.

(Get a grip, luv. Come and give your long lost cousin a kiss hello before the overgrown toy soldier suspects something.)

Moving like a sleepwalker, Buffy walked toward William and offered her cheek for a chaste kiss. She tried to ignore the way Spike was clearly inhaling her scent as he put his arms around her in a welcoming hug that stopped just short of going on longer than it needed to.

(You are sooo going to pay for this.) she thought at him as hard as she could. She could tell from the smile he tried to hide that he heard her and she fixed him with a threatening glare before turning around and walking back to Riley.

“Well, I guess you’ve met everybody, even some people I didn’t know you were going to meet,” Buffy said, struggling to regain her perkiness. She walked toward the kitchen, saying she was going to get them drinks and leaving Riley to make conversation with Willow and Giles.

“William,” she said in her sweetest voice, “Why don’t you help me in here and we can…catch up.”

“It would be my pleasure, love,” he answered, giving the other people in the room an awkward nod as he started toward the kitchen, tripping over the foot stool as he did.

“Oh dear! I am so clumsy. I’m…I’m sorry…I’ll just be…” he edged his way carefully toward the kitchen, keeping his head down and avoiding eye contact the whole time.

“There’s something familiar about…William, is it? I can’t put my finger on it, I just have the feeling I’ve met him before somewhere.”

“That seems unlikely,” Giles said flatly. “He has only been in the country for less than a day.”

“If that’s true, then how does Buffy know him? Isn’t she a California girl, born and bred?”

“I think they used to travel a lot before her parent’s divorced and her dad found new ways to spend his money. Used to go to England every summer.”

Willow did her best to contribute to the “let’s hide the vampire in plain sight” game and was very proud of herself when Giles gave her a pleased smile.

“Yeah,” Xander put in, “now she just gets to go to LA every summer and meet her dad’s latest squeeze.”

“So, Riley,” Giles began in his best surrogate father voice, “what are your plans after you get your degree in…what was it again?”

In the kitchen, Buffy was trying desperately to maintain her anger at Spike for being gone in the face of her equally desperate urge to laugh herself silly at his disguise.

The vampire stood in the entrance to the kitchen, watching the play of emotions flow over the slayer’s expressive face and grinning from ear to ear.

“What’s the matter, pet? Don’t know quite how to act around a real gentleman? Is William a little too proper for you?”

“Is this what you were like before you were turned?” She tried to stifle the laughter still bubbling in her throat.

“If I say yes, will you lose all respect for me as the Big Bad?”

“Too late. I lost that when you stopped being able to bite.”

His eyes flashed amber for a second, then he shrugged and said mildly, “I could find other ways to hurt you…if I wanted to.”

She flushed, reminded of the feelings for her that she now knew he was harboring. Which reminded her of her words the night he left and their effect on him and she looked up quickly and said, “Spike…what I said the other night…”

“Forget it, Slayer. You were right. I had no business…you didn’t need to know that much about my…” He stopped and moved closer to her. He felt her heart rate increase again and stopped moving, trying to prevent the pain he felt from showing on his face.

“I wasn’t going to touch you, luv,” he said softly. “Please don’t be afraid of me.”

Buffy stared at him in confusion for a second before she realized that he had sensed how her heart sped up when he moved closer. Even though he was maintaining the barriers between them, there was no mistaking the pain in his voice and she closed the distance between them herself, touching him gently on the arm.

“I’m not afraid of you, Spike. If you’d stop deciding when you will and won’t let me feel you, you’d know that.” She looked up at him pleadingly. “I don’t want to be in your head all the time. And I definitely don’t want you in mine without my permission, but…but we’re going to have to learn to live with this thing until it goes away. And I can’t do that if you keep shutting me out.”

“Don’t want to shut you out pet, I just don’t want a repeat of the other night. I don’t want you to feel violated. I would never…wouldn’t force myself on you, luv. You’ve got to believe that.”

He took the hand that was resting on his arm and raised it to his mouth, planting a light kiss on her knuckles, then turning it over to kiss her palm. When his soft lips touched the center of her palm and his tongue slid out to caress the sensitive skin there, she gasped and felt moisture seep into her underwear.

(Not gonna promise not to try to seduce you, though,) he smiled up into her eyes.

Buffy snatched her hand back and tried to hide the effect he was having on her traitorous body. Before she could come up with an appropriate response, they were interrupted by Anya. The ex-demon pushed her way into the kitchen and hissed at Buffy.

“Stop hiding in here with Spike and get out there and do something about your boyfriend. He keeps staring at me. What if he figures out I’m an ex demon and tries to capture me? I don’t want to be experimented on and emasculated like Spike was!”

Snickering at Spike’s outraged, “Hey!”, Buffy hastened to sooth Anya’s fears and send her back out to help keep Riley occupied.

“Don’t be silly, Anya. You’re not a demon anymore, and if you don’t act like you’ve got something to hide, he’ll never know you were. He’s probably staring at you because you’re so pretty.”

Immediately mollified, the ex vengeance demon said, “Oh? Do you think so? Because I just tried this hair color and I haven’t decided if…” As she went on talking more or less to herself, she allowed Buffy to push her out into the living room again.

“Okay, William, help me carry these drinks out there,” Buffy said as she reached into the refrigerator for soft drinks and ice. “Do you think you can do that without tripping?”

“Very funny, pet. I could, but I’m not so sure about William.”

She rolled her eyes and handed him the ice bucket. “Then I guess you’d better take something easily cleaned up,” she said as she put the cans and glasses on a tray. “Let’s go….William.”

He stopped her with a light touch on her arm. “So, are we alright, then? You’re not still angry at me?” His speech was an interesting mix of his usual lower class cadences and the cultured tones he’d adopted for his disguise.

“Oh, I’m still royally pissed at you,” she said with a small smile, “but not for what happened the other night.”

(What then?) he raised his eyebrows as he followed her out of the room.

(For being gone for four fucking days without letting me know where you were or if you were all right! For all I knew you were back in the lab being sliced and diced.)

Buffy’s cheery smile at Riley and the Scoobies belied the fury she was sending to the astonished vampire. When William tripped again and dropped the ice cubes onto the Watcher’s back, it had nothing to do with his disguise and everything to do with the bolt of joy that went though him as he absorbed her words.

(She was worried about me. The Slayer was worried about me….)





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