Days passed, then weeks, and then months, and before they realized it, it was time for Christmas. Buffy and Spike’s relationship was progressing nicely, and despite the fact Harmony continued to give Buffy idle threats, nothing had gone wrong. Everyone at both of their schools found out about their relationship, and surprisingly enough, no one had said anything bad about it- their friends were happy for them.
The day before Christmas Eve, Spike drove to Buffy’s house so that they could exchange gifts before he went out of town for a few days. She let him inside the house and hugged him, kissing him softly.
“Well, hello, gorgeous,” he said, running his hand over her hair. “You look lovely.”
“I’m in jeans and an old sweater,” she said, looking at her clothes with a raised eyebrow. “I ‘look lovely’?”
“You always look beautiful,” he replied, smiling. “It doesn’t matter what you wear.”
“Good,” she replied, shrugging. “Then I guess I can stop dressing up whenever we go out on dates. I’ll even be sure to stop wearing that one mini-skirt you like so much.”
“Don’t you dare,” he said quickly with wide eyes. “You’d be cruel if you didn’t wear it anymore.” She giggled and grabbed his hand, leading him into the living room before they sat on the couch. Spike looked at the Christmas tree in the corner and smiled, studying all of the ornaments and lights on it. “No expense spared on the tree, yeah?”
“It’s the one thing my mom loves spending money on,” Buffy answered, smiling. “We decorate it a couple weeks before Christmas together and joke about how ugly the ornaments I made in grade school are.” He chuckled and stood up, walking to the tree. “And if you’re going to make fun of me for decorating a tree with my mom, then I demand my present now.” He grinned at her before taking an ornament off a branch, looking at the picture of a younger Buffy on it.
“You’ve always been adorable,” he said quietly, and she stood up, walking over to him to see it. “How old were you?”
“About ten,” she said, smirking. “That was taken the day before I found out Santa doesn’t exist.”
“Kind of slow to figure that out, eh?” he joked, and she playfully smacked his arm.
“I was in denial,” she replied, hanging up the ornament once again.
“It’s cool that you share something like this with your mum,” he said. “My parents hire someone else to buy our tree and make it look festive.”
“No expense spared?” she asked, repeating his words, and he sighed.
“Pretty much,” he replied before walking back to the couch and sitting down. She followed him and sat on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. “So, what are you asking Santa for this year, little girl?”
“Something of the platinum-blonde variety,” she answered, kissing him. He pulled her closer to his body, eagerly returning the kiss and parting her lips with his tongue. She moaned quietly and allowed her tongue to touch his, reveling in the sensation.
They continued kissing for a while before Spike pulled away to breathe, looking into her eyes as she panted for air. He grazed her cheek and took a deep breath.
“I love you,” he said quietly, noticing the look of shock cover her face almost instantly. She quickly got off of his lap and took several steps back, staring at him. “Buffy?”
“You don’t love me,” she replied, almost as if to make both of them believe it. “You can’t love me. We’ve barely been together for two months.” He stood up and walked over to her, trying to embrace her, but she pushed him away. “You don’t love me, Spike.”
“Yes, I do, pet,” he said, and after she pushed him away again, he frowned. “What’s wrong?”
“Parker told me he loved me after two months, and I believed him,” she said, looking away, feeling tears begin to form in her eyes. “I don’t want a repeat performance of what happened between him and I- I can’t handle that again.”
“I’m not Parker,” Spike said firmly. “I’m not even like him, anymore. You know I’ve changed, Buffy.” He paused. “I changed for you.”
“Don’t say that,” she replied. “You didn’t change for me.”
“I didn’t?” he asked, becoming upset. “You know I did!” She looked away, clenching her jaw. “What the hell does it take, Buffy? I’ve done everything I can to prove to you that I’m a good man, that I’m worthy of being with. I love you, and if you don’t love me, too, that’s fine- I can wait for you to decide that you do. But if you refuse to believe I genuinely love you, then tell me what I have to do to show you it’s true.” She looked at him and studied his expression, noticing the hurt in his eyes.
“I’m scared of being in love again, Spike,” she admitted quietly after a long pause. “Things with Parker and I didn’t work out, and after a year with Riley, I wasn’t as happy as I should’ve been.”
“We’re already doing better than both of those relationships,” Spike said, moving forward to hug her, and this time, she didn’t pull back. Instead, she buried her face in his chest and sighed before looking at him.
“I just don’t want to get into a serious relationship when we’re both going off to college next year and won’t be together anymore,” she said, and his expression darkened quickly.
“You don’t think we’ll stay together after we both graduate high school?” he asked, and she looked down. “You don’t want to be with me after that, Buffy?”
“I do, but I don’t see how it’s feasible,” she explained, not willing to look at him. “If I get my scholarships, I won’t be going anywhere in California- you know I’ve been accepted at Northwestern, NYU, and Wellesley, thanks in part to your mother’s letter of recommendation. You, on the other hand, want to go to UC-Sunnydale or UCLA.” She hesitated. “And I’ve heard the horror stories about couples going off to college together- it doesn’t always work, and when it doesn’t, one or both people involved want to switch schools post-breakup.”
“I’m not asking you to go to college with me,” he replied. “It’d be cool if you did, and I’m sure your mum would like it if you went somewhere around here, but I don’t want you to think that we’re not going to last after graduation. I’m in this for a very long time, luv, and I’m not about to stop being together just because we won’t be in the same county or state.”
“How about time zone?” she joked lightly, and he tilted his head. “It’s almost Christmas, Spike- we’re supposed to be happy. How about foregoing any more serious conversations until after we open our gifts?” He managed to nod and extracted a small wrapped box out of his jacket, handing it to her. She raised an eyebrow and looked at him. “I thought we agreed not to spend over twenty dollars?”
“I know,” he said, shrugging. “You don’t even know what it is yet.” She pulled off the wrapping paper slowly and opened the box before smiling at the silver chandelier earrings inside. “I saw you looking at them in one of your girly catalogues.”
“Thank you,” she said genuinely, kissing him. “They’re perfect.”
“And they’ll look beautiful on you,” he said, grazing her cheek. She smiled and went to the Christmas tree, grabbing a present from underneath it, before returning to Spike and handing it to him. “I don’t need a gift, luv- you’re the best Christmas gift I’ve ever had.” She shot him a playful look. “But if you insist-” He opened the small package to find Billy Idol’s Greatest Hits on CD, along with a silver Zippo lighter. “Luv, the lighter alone costs about twenty.”
“Not when one of your friends works at a store that sells them,” she said, winking at him.
“Thank you, pet,” he said, kissing her. “I love both gifts.”
“Well, now you can listen to your favorite singer on the plane,” she said. “But no smoking, buster- they don’t allow that during flights.”
“So you’re okay with my smoking fixation?” he asked, and she frowned.
“Of course not, but you won’t seem to give it up, so I guess I’ll just continue to let it go,” she replied. “Along with telling you how many health hazards are associated with that nasty little habit of yours.”
“You know that if you asked me to quit, I would,” he said quietly, and she saw the sincerity in his eyes.
“Then quit,” she said, and he took the pack of cigarettes out of his coat before handing them to her. “You’re serious?”
“Whatever makes my girl happy,” he replied, shrugging. She grinned and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him. “I don’t want to go away, luv- I want to be with you over the holidays.”
“Just return home safely,” she said. “And remember- no more lighting up.”
“I know,” he said, nodding. “I’ll refrain from smoking, I promise.” He grazed her cheek and looked into her eyes. “I really do love you, Buffy.” She sighed and looked down, nodding. “If you’d rather have me hate you, I might be able to pretend.” She giggled quietly and looked at him, smiling. “That’s my girl.”
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thank you to those who reviewed chapter 10- I noticed there was a drop-off in the amount of reviews, so I assume some of you are reading Harry Potter instead LOL Only kidding, but it's a great book! I hope you enjoy this chapter, and I promise more Spuffyness ahead!:)