“You alright luv?” Spike asked walking up behind her to run his hands across the knotted muscles in her back. He’d watched her as she’d trained for the last ten minutes and the cold brutality of her attacks was a good gauge of her mood.
“No, I’m really not.” She admitted, leaning back into his touch. “Ya know I always knew that this day would come but did it have to happen when things were so good for us? I mean is there some rule that says when I‘m happy, fate is obligated to throw a wrench in the works?”
Rubbing her down expertly, he felt her calming beneath his hands. “We could just kick the blighters out; let them fight their own battles.”
“Sure, then they’d all get killed and their ghosts would move in to punish us for being selfish.” Buffy closed her eyes and lay back against him. “But then again I already did my selfish phase and I’m just not lucky enough for it to work out for the best again. So I guess we really hafta go play heroes.” She said with a soft whine.
“Don’t listen to Red luv, you didn’t run away; you went to chase your own future. It wasn’t selfish; it was just time to cut yourself loose.” Spike said wrapping his arms around her waist.
“You’re my selfish indulgence Spike and I wouldn’t give you up for the world.” Buffy said softly, turning around in his embrace so she could meet his eyes. “What we have is wrong; death should be our gift to one another, not love. You have no soul and nothing but your word and just by being with you, I am a disgrace to all the Slayers who died before me. But when I’m with you, I don’t care about all the reasons we shouldn’t be together I’m just glad that I was lucky enough to find you. You made me believe in myself again and you taught me how to love again. So no matter how wrong it may seem on the surface, it has never felt wrong inside my heart or soul.”
He ran his fingers through her hair, brushing it back off her face like he had thousands of times before. Through thier bond he could feel her concern fluttering inside her stomach and he wanted to put her at ease again. She had changed so much, relaxed and allowed herself to grow and he wasn't about to let anyone force her back into a mold again. He'd tap dance naked in hell first. “Them coming here doesn’t change what we have Buffy…they can’t touch us.”
She looked up into his eyes, losing herself in the emotions she saw there. “I needed this day to come, I needed to see him and now that I have, I know the truth. My old life made me doubt myself and I couldn’t help wondering if you and I just settled. The ones we wanted didn’t want us, so we found solace in each other. That’s why I wouldn’t give you the words; I wanted to be certain that when I did they would be the truth. I didn’t want what we have to be built on false promises and before I could give you my heart, I had to know it wasn’t still with him. Then he was suddenly standing there and all I could think was how desperately I wanted you there with me. He was just my ex…a guy I once cared deeply about but you Spike…you’re the one. I love you.”
He had imagined this moment hundreds of times in thousands of different way but it was the simple sincerity of her words that left no doubt to the truth of them. Her simple declaration had his beast charging to the surface with the need to take his mate and the man, felt the same need as well. She loved him and she had chosen him…it was all he had ever wanted in his nearly two hundred years of life. With a growl, he wrapped his arms around his waist and tossed her over his shoulder.
Buffy could feel his need to take her through their claim and suddenly she felt very primal. It wasn’t just a need to be with her lover or even the man she loved it was a consuming fire to join with her mate. Mine, mine, mine, her mind screamed and because of their link she knew his entire being was screaming it back at her. Biting into his back and drawling another growl from his throat, she relaxed against him. “Are you just going to stand here or are you going to take me to bed?”
Reaching up, he slapped her on the ass and began to make his way out of the training room and towards the lobby. From the renovated ballroom there was simply no one to avoid going up the main stairs and despite the fact he knew the others were there, he didn’t care.
Wes heard the stifled gasps and looked up to see Spike stalk into the room with a nearly feral look in his eyes and Buffy slung over his shoulder. “Dear lord.” He muttered reaching up to rub his eyes as he mentally worked out how to still get work done when the two of them were in this particular mood.
Getting to his feet, he walked out of the office, grabbing his coat off the rack and pulling it on. Without a word the Fred and Gunn did the same thing, while the others looked at them for an explanation. When Spike gave Buffy a firm swat Wes quickly averted his eyes and cleared his throat loudly as the pair made their way towards the stairs. “I suggest we all go out and get a bite to eat, perhaps even take in a movie.”
Instantly understanding what Wesley was saying, Angel got to his feet and glared at the lovers who were making their way up the stairs as though they were the only two people in the word. “You have got to be kidding me, there isn’t time for them… there‘s work to do.”
“Damn man, if you had what they do, you wouldn’t see it that way.” Gunn said having no idea that once upon a time, Angel had been the one with Buffy. “There ain’t nothing to fight tonight and you can’t blame the man for wanting to cuddle up with his woman.”
“I think it's kinda sweet; two great champions making love before the epic battle.” Fred said shyly, a soft romantic light filling her eyes.
“Spike isn’t a champion.” Angel asserted coolly, barely able to hold back a growl as the first moan from upstairs reached his sensitive ears.
“Perhaps you’re right about him not being a champion for the Powers that Be.” Wes said calmly, an unreadable smile gracing his lips. He’d once been awed by what Angel and Buffy had shared but after seeing Buffy and Spike together he could clearly see how selfish Angel was. “But he is certainly her champion and I doubt he‘d have it any other way. He isn‘t fighting to earn a place in heaven or assuage some past act, he‘s fighting for and beside the woman he loves. I doubt any man or champion would see that as anything less than a noble endeavor.”
Narrowing his eyes, Angel turned on his heel and stormed out of the front door. What did Wesley Whyndam-Whimp know anyways, he asked himself angrily? How could he ever understand what it meant to sacrifice all of your own happiness to ensure the woman you loved found hers? All he wanted was for Buffy to have the kind of life she deserved and if he’d known about her immortality, he’d have never left. She would need someone there to hold her as mortality claimed her friends one by one and that someone needed to be able to help her accept their passing and deal with the pain.
Did all her new little friends really think a soulless thing like Spike could make her happy? Spike was clearly just using her to get at him; he’d probably found her lost and alone and used her confusion to insinuate himself in her life. It was probably his idea of payback because of Drusilla and in her emotional state; Buffy had fallen for his act. He’d probably been waiting for them to find out all this time and now that they had, Angel was sure that Spike would start to reveal his true nature. That’s when I’ll act, he told himself calming down somewhat. Buffy will see, they all would and Spike would be dusted like he so rightly deserved he vowed.
Running his hand down Buffy’s naked back, Spike lowered his mouth to lap at the shallow scratch just above her right shoulder. The moment he’d kicked the door closed behind him, they’d gone at it like wild beasts finally freed. Clothes were ripped and torn away and instead of using words to express they’re love, they allowed their bodies to speak for them. It was violent. Over and over they rolled across their bed in a battle of dominance with neither willing to be the submissive one for long. As a Slayer and a Vampire, fighting was a part of their nature, the need to conquer to consume but it wasn’t any less meaningful than the gentle caresses they now indulged in.
They met each others needs on every possible level and with the haze of passion leaving them; once again they were both awed by how fortunate they were to have found one another…their true equal.
“Again…already?” Buffy asked, not sounding bothered by that at all.
“M’ Always ready for you pet.” Spike said turning her over so he could look into her eyes. “But I just wanna hold you…drown in you for a bit.”
“You always say the sweetest things my beloved warrior poet.” Buffy said softly, laying her head over his still beating heart. They’d learned that after they joined in heart, body and soul, that for a brief while he was technically alive. His skin held warmth, his heart pounded inside his chest and breathing was necessary but since her skin grew cold and her heart stopped, they both understood she was taking his death inside herself and giving him life in return. It was just another physical sign of their devotion to one another, neither held anything back and accepted all they were given. “I wish I had pretty words to give you back.”
“No need luv, when you fight your living poetry for my demon and then you come home and tend our nest, which shows the man how much this all means to you. You’ve been building us a place of our own, showing that what we have is just as important as your need to fight and no one since my mum, has ever been willing to put me first.” Spike brushed a whisper soft kiss against her forehead before drawing her even closer against his chest. “You’re my everything Buffy, the one thing in this world strong enough to make me want to be more than just a monster and even though you held back the words for so long, I know you feel the same way.”
“I do.” Buffy admitted, brushing her cheek against his shoulder. “With you I don’t have to be the Slayer, the hero, I can just be a woman falling asleep in the arms of her lover. I had fire before, I had passion but you give me all of that as well as peace Spike. Like you said, when I'm in your arms I know nothing can touch me. I’m safe and loved and you have never given me a single reason to doubt that it wouldn’t last. Angel and I tossed words like always and forever back and forth and looking back on it now, I think it was our way of trying to convince ourselves that what we had would last. There was always that tiny shred of doubt, the unspoken fears that what we had wasn’t right…that is was wrong and I wouldn’t listen. Angel did and that just goes to show that it wasn’t as real and as lasting as we thought because when this started between us those doubts were there but I always knew you didn't give a damn about whether it was right or not, you just wanted me. Whistler could show up right now and say the world would be sucked into hell if I didn’t let you go and I’d tell him let it come. If he came to you, you'd would tell him to go bugger himself and that's what ever girl wants to know. That you'd be willing to fight for me, stand with me despite the risks or cost and your the first person to give me that. ”
Touched, he bent down to capture her lips and for the rest of the night they re-affirmed their commitment to one another. For them, nothing mattered beyond the person cradled within their embrace. The rest of the world would just have to wait.