Ep 6: Here With Me
A/N: (The song belongs to Dido....i.e. not me!)
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"Ugh..." Buffy rolled over, burying her face further into her pillow at the unwanted sound from outside her bedroom window. *Mmmm, Spike-scented...*
Her legs were caught under the covers, and her feet rubbed together in an attempt to burrow deeper into her own, private world. As she moved, her inner muscles twitched painfully with the pleasant reminder of last night's activities.
A very contented smile spread over the Slayer's face; a very cat-that's-got-the-cream sort of a look. A heavy hand reached out from under the covers, searching for her lover...
She sat up suddenly when her hand hit thin air. Her head spun as she took in the wide-open window and the thick stream of sunlight that poured into the room, and then the empty right side of the bed.
Before she could fluster herself further her eyes spotted something red on the pillow beside her. With limp fingers she lifted the rose from it's resting place, bringing it to her nose so as to inhale it's sweet scent, and she sunk, boneless, to the bed once more.
Her eyelids slid shut as she allowed her other senses to take over and the beautiful memories of the previous night to flood her mind. She buried her nose against the cover's; taking in Spike's unique scent, that of their mating, on top of that of the soft, fragrant rose.
Her whole body tingled with desire and a flood of almost desperate longing slammed through her soul, aching for her vampire's touch.
She knew he'd had to go; sunlight and all...but still, she wished he'd stayed. Somehow, they'd eventually made it from the crypt to her place. He'd insisted on walking her home - determined to protect her from all the 'nasties' out there. Buffy smiled - it had been sweet, a little redundant, but still sweet.
She hadn't wanted to let the night end there, however, and had invited him up. The look on his face once he realised that she wanted him to come up to her room, to take her body in the comfort and privilege of her own home, would have been beautiful if it hadn't been tainted by the sadness that Spike didn't understand just how welcome he was in her life.
Buffy groaned from a place deep in her throat, as she recalled the beauty of their multiple unions that night. The sound came out slightly croaky, as her throat was sore from over-use. Bit like the rest of her body. But, in a good way.
As her thoughts drifted, her right hand absently slid between her thighs, fingering the swollen, wet flesh they discovered there, Buffy amended her thoughts:
*A very, very good way!*
Her heartbeat accelerated slowly as she brought herself closer to a gentle orgasm. A devilishly handsome face, complete with sparkling blue eyes and full pouty lips danced behind her eyes, and she moaned, her hand moving faster. Until finally...
"You gonna sleep the whole day away?!" Dawn's voice, along with the sound of her fist banging on the elder Summers' door.
The Slayer jumped, her hand moving quickly from her body to curl damply around her covers.
"Come on, Buffy! It's Saturday! We got clothes to shop, video's that want a-watchin'!" Dawn continued to call through the door.
"Coming!" Buffy rolled her eyes at the double entendre. "I wish." She muttered, as she realised the moment had been lost. She could always go see Spike...
No. She had to be family-gal today. Joyce and Dawn deserved some Buffy time, not to mention her friends, all of whom seemed to feel a bit neglected by her at the moment.
With a weary sigh, Buffy threw off the covers and pushed herself from the bed. Grabbing her special vanilla scented shower wash from her cupboard, where she kept it hidden from her younger sister's grubby mitts, she headed into the shower.
Twenty minutes later she returned, nicely washed and smelling of vanilla. She dressed surprisingly quickly - only thirty minutes and she was good to go. Buffy quickly exited the room.
Two seconds later she was back, gathering all the linen off her bed to be washed.
--
I didn't hear you leave
I wonder how am I still here
I don't want to move a thing
It might change my memory
--
"Mmmm, juice...juice good!" Buffy moaned, as she gratefully downed the glass her mother had placed in front of her when she entered the kitchen.
"You're up early." Joyce remarked to her eldest as she watched her eyes drop shut then dart open a second later.
"Not my idea." Buffy growled out, in a pretty good imitation of her lover, as she glared at her sister.
Dawn just stuck her tongue out and continued to munch at her cereal. Buffy pulled a face and went back to her croissant. Joyce smiled, amused by her daughters and went back to sipping her morning coffee.
--
Oh, I am what I am
I'll do what I want
But I can't hide
--
"...And I was all like joking and he was smiling..."
It wasn't right to miss someone this much, surely. There had to be a law against it or something...
"...He has these really deep, green eyes and his hair is all over the place but..."
It had only been a few hours.
Well, more like eight hours...and twenty minutes...and thirty three seconds...
Not that she was counting.
Her body throbbed in denial...
Okay, so she was sooo counting!
"...and then Janice said that he was a freak and he like walked off. I mean, if he really liked me, he would have stayed, right? Right? Buffy?"
Buffy snapped out of her daze to see Dawn standing directly in front of her, a questioning look on her face and a red top in her hand. Oh yeah, mall, shopping, Dawn...
"Huh, uh, yeah, I think that'll be a great colour on you." Buffy tried to smile.
"Buffy! I so did not ask you that! Can't you at least try to listen? I get that you want to be shagging your boyfriend right now, but a little sister bonding wouldn't kill you!"
Buffy was about to try and back peddle when she saw the teasing look in her sister's eyes, "Shagging?"
"Spike-talk."
"I know - you two are both crazy!" Buffy rolled her eyes. "Wanna keep going?"
"Nuh, uh Buffy! Not letting you off that easy. You owe me major favours for your lack of sister co-operation!"
"Is that so?" Buffy smiled at her sister.
"Yup."
"Fine. Whattd'ya want?"
Dawn held up the aforementioned item of clothing. "Top pretty...pretty top!"
Buffy sighed and glanced at the top then back at her sister's unrelenting face then back at the top. "Deal. But then you have to be nice for an hour."
"Nope. I get pampered 'cause you're not listening like all good siblings should! I'm talking major boy-talk here!"
"Okay, top. But that’s it and you have to forgive me."
"Done." Dawn smiled and walked off waiting for...
"DAWN! This is fifty dollars!"
The younger Summer's spun round, sticking her tongue out at Buffy, "You promised!"
--
I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
Until you're resting here with me
--
Buffy stared out the window, half an ear on the conversation taking place in the front of the car as the three Summers' drove home from a Saturday morning shopping spree.
She still missed him.
It wasn't fair.
She was supposed to be able to function without him...not have him fill her every waking thought.
It had never been like this before, not even with Angel.
Never had she felt this all consuming need to be with someone; to be near him, talking to him, touching him, laughing with him, loving him...
And it scared her.
--
I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
Until you're resting here with me
--
She could feel his essence pulling her to him. Was it part of the claim? Or was this something else entirely?
She missed him. She ached for him. She needed him.
--
I don't want to call my friends
They might wake me from this dream
And I can't leave this bed
Risk forgetting all that's been
--
Buffy tried to smile over her cup of mocha, as Xander cracked jokes but she couldn't quite manage it, and hid her un-smiling lips behind the mug.
They were at the local Java Hut, the five of them huddled around a table.
Willow and Tara, Xander and Anya...and her.
But she was alone.
Didn't they see that maybe she felt the alone-ness. That she wanted her partner to be with her, and that it hurt her that they never tried to do anything that involved him too.
*Willow and Tara. Wara. Tillow. WillowandTara.*
It was funny the way established couple's names tended to run together and merge into one.
*Xander and Anya. Xanya. Ander. XanderandAnya.*
She saw Willow glance at her out of the corner of her eye and quickly put on her best show-smile for her benefit. It seemed to placate the witch and allowed the Slayer to go back inside her own thoughts once more.
*Hmm, Spike and Buffy. Buffy and Spike. Bike. No, that’s too object-y. And kinda sounds like Pike. Wow, when was the last time I thought of him? Never mind...SpikeandBuffy. Umm, Spuffy. Oh yeah, I likes! Mmmm, Spuffy-ness!*
She saw Tara notice her smile and favoured her with a true one in response. It dropped when she saw the dusty blonde take her girlfriends hand and give it loving squeeze.
*God, I miss him.*
--
Oh, I am what I am
I'll do what I want
But I can't hide
--
My God, they were still talking. *Haven't we been here long enough, already?* Her foot tapped restlessly against the chair leg, bringing her to the groups attention.
"You okay, Buffy?" Xander asked, mid-bite, spraying little bits of the cake over his girlfriend who wiped them off with an unseen glare.
She didn't answer, too lost in her own thoughts.
"Buffy?" Willow prodded her and she jumped alive with a start.
"Hmm? Is it time to go?" Her eyes scanned the group expectantly.
"Uh, we weren't gonna but if you wanna move on..."
"Why don't we go to the movies? Catch one of the afternoon showings?" Tara suggested and the group slowly picked up their things and left the coffee shop.
--
I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
Until you're resting here with me
--
"Maybe she's just tired." Willow offered to Xander quietly as the group walked to the cinema.
"Doing what?" He asked sceptically, unhappy that one of his best buds hadn't been paying him much attention on their one designated 'Friends Day' in weeks.
"I would think that having sex with a vampire would be very tiring. Especially for a human. 'Cause they have such good stamina, Spike must last for hours." Anya stated very loudly so that all five could hear.
Buffy, who had perked up at the mention of her favourite two-word combination – Spike and sex -, smiled at the former demoness, "Yeah, he does! It's very wow-worthy!"
"But at least you must have some slayer endurance, yes?" Anya asked as the Slayer linked arms with her, happy the conversation was going her way for the first time all day.
"Yeah, totally, it's an absolute God send - don't know if I could keep up without it!" The two girls giggled while the rest of the group looked at them in horror, mindlessly following. "I think it's mutually tiring."
"Riley must have been very boring for you." Anya said sympathetically as they crossed the street.
"A-Anya!" Xander splutter, finally coming out his stupor only for his eyes to pop out of his head as the slayer exclaimed:
"God, yes! Finally someone sees that!"
--
I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
Until you're resting here
--
*Stupid Xander.* Was the single thought that revolved around both the Slayer and ex-demoness' heads as the carpenter put a stop to their conversation by whisking Anya away.
Buffy pouted, absently glazing over the various confectionary items. Her mind hummed as she recalled Spike's rather artistic uses for many of the sweets, before settling on a bag of popcorn. She bought two, stowing the other away for when they could be together again.
--
I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
Until you're resting here with me
--
This film sucked. It sucked beyond the meaning of the word sucked. As Homer Simpson once eloquently put, "I've seen plays more interesting then this, honest-to-God, plays!"
Laughter.
She could hear laughter.
*Where was it...oh my god.* The audience were actually laughing out loud. *Okay, so it’s kinda funny but not laugh-out-loud funny.*
Spike had a nice laugh. It changed depending on his mood. When he was horny, it was all low and husky; sending shivers straight down her spine.
When he found something funny it was so open. He never held anything back and she always felt like he was pouring all his emotions into the joyous sound.
When he was playful it was almost a giggle, not that he'd ever admit it.
And what’s more: they were all her laughs – the ones no one else got to hear.
--
I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
Until you're resting here with me
--
*God this is boring, I don't even get the plot...I wanna go....No, come on, Buffy, everyone else is enjoying themselves, why not you?*
But she knew why.
And a handful of Willow's popcorn wasn't gonna make it go away.
--
Oh, I am what I am
I'll do what I want
But I can't hide
--
She couldn't take it anymore.
It was madness.
None of the others had to spent their time away from their loved ones...why should she?
"I have to go."
She was assaulted with a chorus of quiet "Why?"'s and "Buff, no!"'s. Not to mention grumbles from the surrounding audience at the unneeded interruption. But it didn't faze her, she picked up her stuff and quickly left the cinema.
--
And I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
Until you're resting here with me
--
She ran to the crypt, her heart pumping furiously in her chest. Random headstones and plaques were dodged with slayer-ease as she sought out her prize.
Finally, she reached her goal, and she stood, slightly out of breath in front of the crypt, waiting.
Just waiting.
*Okay, and breathe...*
--
I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
Until you're resting here
--
It was cooler in the crypt. For some reason she always thought it would be warmer, what with the lack of windows and ventilation, but that was never the case.
The heavy, stone door shut silently behind her and she moved a step further inside. Her eyes scanned the area, searching out her lover. But he wasn't there.
Before she could freak, her eyes caught a sliver of light coming from the downstairs area.
With a smile, she slowly slipped below. Her feet landed silently on the stone floor and her mouth curved upward as she took in the sight of her lover, sprawled across the bed. His chest, bare and uncovered, was rising with habitual breath and she found her breath slowing to match his pace.
"Buffy..."
She smiled, a deep-contented smile as she heard her name tumble, unconsciously from his lips. His yummy, why-aren't-they-kissing-me-right-now lips.
Her clothes slipped silently to the floor, she barely felt them leave her body.
Naked, she glided across the room until finally she rested close to his, their, bed.
--
I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
Until you're resting here with me
--
His eyes opened slowly, startlingly blue orbs piercing her own and she felt like she was drowning...
"I missed you, today."
Spike smiled, opening his arms to her and she slipped into his embrace.
"Thought this was a 'friends only' day." He murmured to her as his eyes took in the time. Still the afternoon - five long hours till sun down.
"What can I say? Couldn't wait." Buffy said, deadpan and shivered as his deep, rumbling laughter rocked her body.
"I've been dreaming about you, ducks. Naughty...wicked...dreams." He punctuated his words with a nip or a kiss to her exposed jaw. "Involved popcorn..."
Buffy looked up at him, pressing her lips mischievously together, as she held up the packet she'd previously purchased. "Show me."
--
I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
Until you're resting here with me
--
The End
TBC in #1 Crush
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