Chapter 13: Houseguests
Dawn and Spike made their way to the parking lot to the rented car. As Spike started the car up, he noticed Buffy walking out of the hospital with measured, confident steps. He watched as she hit the remote on her key ring and a midnight blue roadster convertible blinked its headlights and beeped confirmation. She slowly opened the door and slid her svelte body in the driver’s side, started the powerful machine and put it in gear.
“I guess just follow her,” Dawn pointed at Buffy’s retreating back lights. Spike put their car into gear and pulled quickly behind Buffy.
After a fast five minutes, the pair of cars pulled up to a modest looking two story beach house. The outside walls looked like white stucco with archways for windows and doors. Buffy parked her car next to the garage and got out. Spike and Dawn pulled up beside her and they got out of their car. Buffy already was walking through the first archway through a covered twelve-foot deep front porch to open the front door and disappear through it.
“Come on in, guys,” She hollered back to the two guests, trying to not make a big deal of inviting Spike in. Dawn followed her sister through the porch and front door, Spike bringing up the rear. When he walked in, he looked up to see the great room with a winding staircase in the corner. The walls were a rich green with a faux finish to resemble marble. To the right of the great room was a small room that looked like it was used as an office. To the left was a small dining room. Dawn dragged him through the front room to the living room directly behind it. He stepped down into the room and was hit with the brilliant image of Buffy’s inner sanctum. To the left of where they were standing was a relatively large kitchen that also was open to the dining room in the front of the house. In front of them Buffy was busy opening a series of French doors that lead to a deck. A low rumble of the ocean penetrated Spike’s thoughts.
“Wow, did you rob a bank or something?” Spike said in awe.
Buffy chuckled, “If you asked Palo, yes. But no, just got lucky.”
“Yeah, I heard ‘bout your friend passing, sorry ‘bout that.” If Spike could flush, he would. He was standing in Buffy’s living room, having a normal conversation with her. Suddenly the spot of wood under Spikes shoe was interesting as he studied it.
“Don’t be, Frank was ready to make the final journey.” Buffy smiled slightly at the memory of the 85 year old business man. She always thought he was just tending bar for the money, not for the hell of it. She chuckled at the memories of the cranky old man.
“Yeah, still, must ‘urt like a bitch.” Spike looked up as Buffy walked around the living room to round a bar.
“Yeah, well. Let’s drink to it. Still like Jack?” Her eyebrow rose.
“You know it. But of course Jimmy and Jose are my friends, too.”
Buffy chuckled nerviously as she directed her attention to her sister who just sat down on a deep blue comfortable looking sofa. “My usual,” Buffy walked around the front of the bar and set Spike’s glass of Jack Daniels and Dawn’s wine cooler down on the coffee table. She went into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water for herself. She motioned for Spike to sit next to Dawn as she sat down opposite from them on a matching blue sofa. It was all too strange to see Spike again, especially in her house. All her memories and feelings of their past relationship started to bubble in her brain, cautioning her of the danger he presents.
“So, you two, what brings you to paradise?” Buffy tried to stomp down the bitch inside her and have a pleasant conversation, until either gave her reason for Bitchy Buffy to emerge. Dawn answered Buffy explaining that Spike came back into town, looking for her. Dawn did not mention he really was there to grieve for Buffy’s demise. She knew that Spike would not want Buffy to know that the only reason he stepped foot back into Sunnydale was when he thought Buffy was dead. Spike stayed quiet, studying Buffy’s reactions to Dawns explanation. On the outside, she seemed to believe everything that Dawn said at face value, nodding and glancing from Dawn to Spike every couple minutes. He could tell, she was just acting, trying to make them think she was taking the explanation at face value. He could always see into her. Always know what she was thinking. Her eyes weren’t cold, but they weren’t any where near warm. It seemed that Buffy was just taking the information in and processing it, without emotion. Evidently the return trip from the hospital had put the damper on her good mood about him being here. He better pad himself now for the eventual blow up in his direction. Whenever Dawn said something remotely funny, Buffy would smile or chuckle, yet the gaiety didn’t seem to enter her eyes. Always weary, always gauging, always adapting to the surroundings.
“So, you are telling me, after what? Six years you just happen to go back to Sunnydale? Isn’t that a little convenient?”
Dawn and Spike glanced at each other, both resembling deer caught in head lights. Just thirty seconds ago, Buffy was laughing and smiling along with Dawn. “Um, well, yeah.”
“You know what I think?” Buffy pointed to Spike. “I think you over heard some demon talk about a new slayer. And you thought that I must have died, again by the way, for a new one to be called. Then you thought it would be ‘safe’ for you to come back to Sunnydale. Am I close?” Spike and Dawn nodded. “Now, I don’t know how you figured out that it wasn’t me, but you did. I have to accept that. I have to accept a lot of things. Don’t I?” Buffy glared at Dawn at her last statement. “But what I don’t have to accept is you two coming to MY home, blasting smoke up my ass, and expecting me to play the dumb girl.” Buffy got up from the couch and started to pace in front of them. “What did you think? I would open my arms and accept you back into my life?” Duh, Buffy almost did that at the hospital. Spike looked at her warily, ready for an attack. She was always unpredictable. “OK, I did, at first. I mean, how did you two expect me to react to something like that?” Buffy caught Dawn’s eye, knowing her sister knew how Buffy felt about Spike. Only a little over one month ago while Dawn was visiting they got so sopping drunk that Buffy told Dawn she still wasn’t over her feelings for Spike. How she thought she loved him then and still. “Bam, there you two are, just like old times. Fucking up my life. And yes, I finally have a life!” She glared back to Dawn. “I fucking made sure YOU didn’t have to quit school to work in some grease pit that didn’t even make ends meet at the end of the month. I made sure you COULD have a life. And what do you do? Drag up my past, right as I round the corner to the future. Boy, thanks, Dawn. You are SUCH a good sister.” Dawn looked at Buffy. This isn’t the way it was supposed to go. Buffy was supposed to be happy Spike was here, that Dawn made Spike come. Not attack her and for all intents and purposes call her ungrateful and a bad sister. She was supposed to get a little miffed and talk the past out so they could move on.
“Bloody hell Slayer! Now wait a minute, she doesn’t deserve this…” Spike jumped up, ready to defend Dawn.
“Oh, don’t you start on me. She deserves all of this.” Buffy waved her arms around. “Everything I did was for her. Every painful step I took was so she didn’t have to take it.” Buffy stopped, took a deep breath and continued softly looking and Dawn’s tear streaked face, “Everything I sacrificed was for you.” Buffy stepped away. “Dawn you know how I feel about everything, yet you couldn’t even warn me? Give me a couple days warning, a days warning, an hours waning? Give me at least five minutes warning? Nope, you had to just shove all my past failings into my face again, without a moments notice?” Dawn nodded. This discussion went past Spike; this discussion was years in the making. Spike looked at the two sisters, not understanding the undertones of the argument. This was no longer about Spike and Dawn showing up unexpectedly. This was more than Spike’s and Buffy’s past relationship.
“I don’t know what is going on between you two, but I know both of your emotions are high right now and maybe….”
“Maybe you should stay out of it, Spike, you are right you have no idea you WEREN’T around, were you? Maybe if you were, you would know exactly WHAT is going on.” Buffy’s eyes flashed triumph for cutting him so deep, like he did her when he left, but it quickly dissipated. “Dawn knows what I am talking about, don’t you Dawn?” She cooed sarcastically. “Maybe if she would ever grow up and think about something other than the end of her nose, she will explain exactly what I mean.”
Dawn looked up and the pair who where glaring at each other. “Stop it!” The two (former) enemies moved their heads in unison to look at Dawn. “Ok, I know I sprang this on you, I’m sorry. But he was going to leave town, I had to stop him.” She pointed a long finger in Spike’s direction and then redirected it towards Buffy. “You wouldn’t stop him the last time, but I did this time. It isn’t fair for him, to live with your memory and not know what you know. And I know you know what I am talking about.” Dawn wagged her finger. “You two have unresolved issues and if you two can look beyond YOUR noses maybe you two can resolve it.” Dawn jumped up. “This argument isn’t about Spike, or me, or us showing up. This is about you facing the issues you said you were ready to face. Was it a lie?” Dawn held her hands out palms up and whispered, “Was it a lie?”
Buffy shook her head. “This isn’t about that, Dawn. That is between me and my past and who ever was in the past. This is about you pouncing on me and expecting me to go along with whatever story you concoct without questions. You never even flinched when I told you were blowing smoke up my ass, so I must have been right. Dawn, you should know better than to swoop down on me with this.”
“Look ‘ere, you Bloody BINT. Stop harassing her. So you two have issues, so we all have issues. This yelling thing you are doing? Isn’t going to change that we came ‘ere. Isn’t going to change that I am here. Isn’t going to change that you actually ‘hugged me at the ‘hospital. Isn’t going to change that I still have feelings for you. You can’t change the past and neither can I. But we can move on. Is you would stop bloody yelling at us.”
“Oh no you don’t. Spike, I’m sorry, but you can’t just come in here…”
“Bloody hell, did you just apologize to me? This is got to be a red letter day!” Spike smirked, proud that he actually could call her out.
“Shut up, Spike. For once, just shut up!” Buffy fumed. “What I was going to say was you can’t just walk in here and expect me to leave off where we did. A lot has changed. I have changed. I am sure you have, too.” Buffy whispered the last sentence.
“Oh, now you can admit I can change?” Spike liked how this was going. Six years ago, Buffy wouldn’t even admit this stuff. Now she was so seething, the words were just tumbling out of her mouth.
“You don’t give up, do you Spike? Look, I know you can change. There, happy?” At his nod, she continued. “But that means squat. You know that? The past? Means squat, too. But this? All this started because Dawn had to see my reaction. Isn’t that right?” Buffy glared at Dawn. “Couldn’t get over it, could you? Couldn’t get over that I broke free.”
“You know what? You are a bitch, Buffy. You are selfish, too. SO that makes you a selfish bitch. Not one month ago, you told me what you were willing to do to fix the past with Spike, and here you are making it about me.” Spike looked at the two sisters. This was too much. Too much emotion. Too much information. She wanted to fix things with him, but now it seems that is thrown out of the window. Not with her yelling at him.
Spike turned around and headed towards the back doors. He had to get out. Had to think the next course of action. “See you birds, later, after you two cool down.”
“Where do you think you are going?” Buffy screeched behind him.
“Told you, OUT, you Bloody Bint.” With that, Spike quickly escaped the emotionally charged house and started to walk down the beach. He didn’t know where he was going, but with all the revelations that occurred, he had a lot to think about. Back at the house, World War Three erupted.
“I can’t believe you just let him go, he came to see you and you can be is the biggest bitch in the world, more so now than in the past.” Dawn screamed at Buffy as she tried to search for the retreating form of Spike on the beach.
“Oh, Spike can take care of himself. This has nothing to do with him. This argument is about us, or more to the point the way you think you can do what you please.”
“Oh give me a break, Buffy. I know you are happy to see him. I know he is happy to see you, too. Just go after him and bring him back.”
“No,” Buffy crossed her arms and shook her head.
“What do you mean ‘No?”
“As in, I am not doing your bidding young lady. You can’t keep springing surprises on me and expect me to roll over.” Buffy’s voice returned to normal.
“What do you mean by that, aren’t you happy to see Spike?”
“Of course, Dawn you know that. But a little warning about it would have been nice.”
“I tried Buffy; I called the club and talked to Sam. I left messages on your machine. You never returned them.”
“Yeah, I was a little busy with Emily and business to drop everything and call you, unless you wanted me to call you at 3 in the morning?”
“But I never knew something was wrong.”
“No, you never thought. You know who you remind me of?” Dawn shook her head no, “You remind me of myself at your age. Other than the Slayer stuff and saving the world, I only thought of my needs. That’s what you did. Did you even think how I would react to Spike? Or how Spike might react to me?” Dawn didn’t like this. She wasn’t like Buffy. She only thought about how happy they would be. She knew both missed each other immensely. At least, that’s how is should have gone if Buffy wasn’t so stubborn.
“Of course, you two are supposed to talk, not yell at each other. And then you two would be happy.”
“I guess in Dawn’s world, that’s how it goes. But in the real world? We don’t get to talk it out all nice and calm. Spike and I bring out the worst in each other. We bring out pride, stubbornness, and passion. Those qualities don’t lend themselves to a nice adult conversation with each other. This is how we talk: lots of yelling.”
“That’s the lamest excuse I ever heard.” Dawn wiggled her finger at Buffy.
“No, it’s not an excuse it’s us. Ever wonder why we were such good enemies? Why we enjoyed fighting each other? Why we never could win against each other but kept on trying? But this is neither here nor there. Spike and I will find a way to talk, I promise you, so stop pushing, ok?” Dawn took a step back. She had promised to work on talking to Spike, but Spike as no where near here. And he doesn’t know the terrain.
“Maybe you should go after him.”
“No.”
“Oh come on Buffy, he doesn’t know where he is, he could be lost.”
“Trust me he isn’t lost.” Buffy knew this because she could feel him, no two hundred feet away, waiting, listening to their argument, protecting Dawn from Buffy’s words.
“You are so stubborn sometimes."
“Yeah, well, so are you. Now, we have to talk. You can’t just come down here; invade my life, without the slightest bit of warning. You’ve done it three times now, and it has to stop.”
“I’m sorry, but I thought you would be happy.”
“Dawn, this isn’t about being happy, this is about you thinking it is OK to bring your luggage to me, drop it on my doorstep, and then running away.”
“I didn’t mean…”
“I know. I know you don’t mean to, but you do and it is becoming a habit. I may no longer be your guardian. But Mom entrusted me to raise you right. And at the moment, I don’t think I have.”
“Buffy, don’t say that. Yeah we have had hard times, but I’ve never gone with needing anything. You always made sure I had all the basics and some of the not so basics. And you even are helping me with school.”
“Dawn, the only reason you haven’t gone needing anything is because of Dad. If he refused to help with the house and your school supplies, you would have gone without a lot. Which brings me back to the Number One time you dropped and ran?” Dawn had the decency to look ashamed. “Bringing our father to my home in Colorado so I could tell him to stay out of your life was a world of wrong.”
“I know, Buff, we’ve been through this…”
“Yeah, but it seems that I have to go over it again so you understand you keep repeating the same action.”
“But see, I’m not running.” Dawn giggled, “Spike did.”
Buffy chuckled at that, knowing the vampire outside heard it and started to pace. “No, not now, but I know you. You are planning on going back in a day or so, just long enough to make sure we aren’t killing each other.” Dawn nodded, her sister knew her too well. “So you may not be running, but in the future you plan to. Like I told you, this place isn’t some place you run to or from. This place makes you face your issues. You may not run from this, Spike, or me. You may leave or come when you are ready, but you are no longer allowed to run. Do we understand each other?” Dawn nodded again. “Ok, on to Number Two…”
“Ok, Ok. I get it. Don’t have to go to number two or number three. I promise there won’t be a number four, OK? Is that what you want to hear?” Buffy looked at Dawn and held her arms outstretched. Dawn quickly came into the embrace. “Are we good?”
Yeah, we are good.” Buffy felt the familiar presence retreat. He made sure they weren’t going to kill each other, but he still needed time. Buffy could respect that. “Look, Dawn, I will go after Spike, but not right now. He needs his space.” Dawn seemed to understand and nodded with agreement. “Hungry?”
~*~*~*~
“Buffy, it’s four, he still hasn’t come back; will you please go find him, now?” Dawn whined for the sixty-ith time. The two sisters were sitting out on the deck talking and playing cards. Buffy hadn’t felt Spike’s presence since he left after Dawn’s and her fight.
“Guess I better, since I have no idea where he went.” Buffy got up and headed down to the beach trying to follow the trail her Spike-sense could pick up.
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