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Spike sat looking out the window, wishing that Tara had not taken his last pack of cigarettes. He needed to calm his nerves.

It was times like this that he wished his hospital room had a mini bar. He could really go for some Jack Daniels right about now. Nevertheless, he could not drink, he could not smoke; he could not even walk now. He could not shag -- not that some of the nurses had not given him the chance. He laughed at the thought, since it was shagging that got him into trouble in the first place.

~
Willies bar wasn’t on the good side of town in fact it wasn’t even on the good side of the bad part of town but it was the only bar in Sunnydale that didn’t card. A fact William was using to his full advantage.

He sat at the bar downing his umpteenth shot of whiskey. The taste wasn’t so bad once you got used to it. He didn’t know if he had got used to the taste or he had drunk so much he had burnt the taste buds off his tongue.

But one thing was for sure with every shot things became so much clearer to him.

He hadn’t spoken to Buffy since he left her room. He had tried to act casual careful not to show what her rejection had done to him. But his heart felt broken. Buffy was his best friend she knew him better than he knew himself sometimes. They had always said no matter what they would be there for each other. But when push came to shove. She treated him like everyone else had, like the loser he felt deep down that he was.

“If she couldn’t love me then who can?” he laughed at his own words ‘what a ponce, what has she done to me?” He closed his eyes as the room started to spin.

“I can my dark prince , I can.”

When he opened them he saw her.

~

“Hello, Spike.” He turned to see his dark princess.

“Dru,” She moved over to the window.

“You’re surrounded by Sunshine,” she looked worriedly at him.

“Well that’s what happens when you sit by the window, pet.” He reached out to her and pulled her into his lap.

“Not the sun, my Spike. You’re surrounded by your Sunshine. She’s all around you.” Spike looked at her and pulled her closer.

“Pet, I don’t know what you’re on about. I’ve missed you.” He leaned in to try to kiss her.

Dru jumped up. “Lies don’t suit you, Spike. She was here in this room.”

“Who was here, luv?” His stomach churned as he realised who she was talking about.

“Buffy.” He looked down so his face would not give away what his heart felt.

“I told her not to see you,” her voice hardened.

“What do you mean you told her? You knew she was here?” He was getting angry now. “Why didn’t you tell me? I had a right to know.”

“Why? Why do you have the right? She does not love you. You know that she has never told you. However, I do Spike. My love, my passion made you into what you are today. You would be nothing without me. Would you throw that all away on a stupid school boy crush over some one-night stand?” She was angry now.

“Don’t talk about Buffy like that. She doesn’t deserve it.”

“Neither do I. Listen to me. No one has ever loved you as I have, Spike. I saw the man you could be all those years ago -- the passion and the desire bursting to get out.” She moved back toward him. “I found you, Spike. I made you. You belong to me.”

He looked up at her. She was right. Dru had made him from that first night she found him drunk as a lord at the local bar. He was hers.

“I know.” He reached for her and kissed her deeply.

~

Buffy pounded the punching bag repeatedly. With each hit, she felt her tension release. Seeing Spike had been hard, but it had not given her the closure she needed.

‘I am better than this,’ she thought to herself. ‘I don’t need Spike Giles in my life to make me happy.’ With that, she started pounding away again.

“Buffy. Hey.” Tara entered the gym.

“Tara. How are things?” She stopped the punching.

“Good, just about to have another therapy session with Spike.” She placed her folders down on the bench.

“Oh.” Her face fell. “Is he meeting you here?” She picked up her drink bottle and took a sip.

“Yeah, he’s a bit late. You know, rock stars are always on their own schedule.”

“Yeah, and we the little people have to fit in,” she replied.

“But, you know him, don’t you?” Tara asked.

Buffy sighed. “What did Willow tell you?”

“Not much. She said it wasn’t her tale to tell.”

“We went to school together, best friends …” she started.

“You’re the girl!” All the pieces fit together in Tara’s mind.

“What am I?” Buffy looked at her puzzled.

“Spike was telling me about his past. Who he was, he mentioned his best friend during high school. It was you.”

“That it was.” She turned and started packing up her bag. “We were different people back then. Everything was much simpler. Then I went and complicated it.”

“How?”

“How do you think most male-female friendships get complicated?” She raised her eyebrows.

“Did he try to...?” Tara tried to find the right words.

“No. Will, I mean, Spike, wouldn’t have touched a hair on my head. I asked him to …” She looked around the room trying to express her thoughts.

“I was young and naïve, you know. I just wanted to have sex with someone on my own terms, you know. I wanted the experience, not the emotions. I thought if I slept with him it would be like that. We could help each other out. That’s what friends are for. I didn’t love him, it made things easier…” She was trying to convince herself.

“But you did,” Tara added.

“Yeah, I did. I loved him so much that night and every night since,” she replied.

“Don’t you think its time to tell him that?”

“Yeah, I think it is.” She picked up her bag and made her way to his room.

~

Spike’s hand roughly caressed Dru’s breast. He smiled to himself as she moaned in response. ‘This is all I need. Dam Buffy. Dru loves me.’ He let his hand slip down to lift the hem of her skirt as he shook all images of Buffy from his mind.

~

Buffy stood at the doorway of Spike’s room watching him and Dru kiss. The sense of deja vu was overwhelming. ‘Every time I go to tell him my feelings this happens.’ She felt as if the world was trying to tell her something. It was telling her to move on. She turned to walk away and ran into another person.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” She looked up. “Hey Riley, I didn’t see you there.”

“Obviously,” he grinned. He was glad he ran into her. He had been trying to pluck up the courage to ask her out.

As she looked at Riley, she knew that the universe was giving her a cosmic shove in the right direction.

“So Riley, you want go out with me on Saturday?”





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