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Hey guys sorry for the delay. Hope you enjoy the new chapter.
She knew.

On some level, Dru had always known. She always had a gift of sorts, to be able to see a person’s true nature. Most of the time it was a blessing, it helped her push people’s buttons, manipulate them into doing her will. However, sometimes it was a curse.

It was with her gift that saw the man Spike could be all those years ago in Willie’s Bar. Ironically, it was the same sense that told her that he did not love her as well.


At first, it did not matter that she did not have his heart. She had every other part of him at her will. She had chipped away at the man he was and replaced it with the one who she wanted him to be. Buffy had helped with that, he had told her the completely silly tale after she had ran out of the room. Right then, she knew she had the ammunition to change him. She played to the fact that Buffy did not love him as he was. Therefore, she changed him into someone else.

She knew her influence was major, but not the only one in his life. Buffy was always there in the background. Dru knew the songs he wrote were not about her. Well, the love ones at least. Songs about lust passion and desire she was sure they were about her. She did not care if the songs were about her, Buffy or his aunt Mary. All that mattered was that they were hits, which made them all rich. Even though she did not have his heart, she was the one that reaped the benefits from it.

As she watched the scene in the gym play out before her, she needed no such gift to know what was happening.

~

Buffy pulled back abruptly from his kiss.

"Don’t Spike," she moved away from him.

"What are you doing? Did you think you could just walk in here and say a few nice things and then be with me?" Her words stung him.

"No. I would never presume not after." He looked up at her knowing he did not have to finish the sentence.

"It’s just that I’m tired Buffy. Tired of all the lies and deception. I just want to be me again." His shoulders sagged as he sat down on the gym bench.

"I worked so hard all these years to be whatever I needed to be. In order to get what I needed to get. I thought if I changed, it would be enough. What I wouldn’t have done to be hers."

Buffy’s heart ached at his words. She turned to storm out.

"I don’t need to hear about what you did to get Dru. What kind of sick game are you playing at Spike? You tell me that you love me, and then proceed to give me a rundown of your seduction of Dru. I am better than this."

His words stopped her in her tracks.

"Yours, I wanted to be yours. At the start, I wanted to be the man you wanted. You didn’t want me, so I thought if I became the opposite. You would love me as much as l loved you. I kept trying to find you to show you the kind of man I had become."

He had not meant his explanation to sound so desperate. Nevertheless, the truth had been bottled within him for so long that he could not stop it from all spilling out at once.

"And what was Dru? Did you really think I would just forget about you two?"

"I can’t say she was a mistake. In some ways, I wouldn’t be here without her. However, I can say I did the wrong thing. I used her for all the wrong reasons. She gave me what I wanted, the love, passion and desire. But, I didn’t want them from her. I wanted them from you."

"I don’t know if I can give them to you Spike. Not after all this time, after all that’s been said and done." Her heart felt like it was breaking all over again.

"I know. I don’t say these things to make you feel for me. I say them because they are true. I am sick of lying. All these years I felt like an impostor. That I was always one-step away from being found out. It never felt right. I thought if I kept running from the truth it would be okay. When I am with you, it feels right. The truth feels right."

He let out the breath he had no idea he was holding.

Buffy took in his words. "I know what you mean. I guess the truth feels right because it is." She stepped towards him. "I have spent so long being angry. Too long. Its time to move on."

"What does that mean Buffy?" She sat down beside him on the bench. "How do we move on?"

He moved his hand and took hers in his. His heart soared, as she did not snatch it away.

"I don’t know." She sighed.

Buffy looked down at their entwined hands. Spike was right; the truth did feel right. Her body shivered as he gently stroked her with his thumb. As if of its own accord, she leant into him and rested against him.

Spike chuckled. She looked up him questioningly.

"Do you remember the time we dared each other to eat three tubs of ice cream?"

"Remember, I still have the cold headache from it." She smiled at the memory.

"Maybe that’s what we should do then." He raised his brow.

"What eat gallons of ice cream?" She laughed at the thought.

"Tempting, but no. We were friends once Spike, before all this mess started. Perhaps that is what we should be now. Friends."

"I will on one condition?"

She frowned at his response. She wanted there simple friendship and he wanted to set terms and conditions. She rolled her eyes and got up from the bench.

"You say you want the truth but you want it on your terms. Gee Spike I don’t think this is going to work." She started for the door.

"William," she stopped in her tracks. "Please call me Will. Spike, he is a lie. Will is who I am. Will is your friend, was always there for you. Can I be that again please?"

She turned and looked at the man sitting before her. In so many ways, he was still the boy on her bed all those years ago.

"Yes Will. You can be that again."





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