Vacation. That word sounded foreign to her when it should have been welcomed. As things turned out, it was the last thing she wanted. These days her mind was more pre-occupied with worries about her mother…and her now empty fridge.
Buffy sighed closing the refrigerator door. “ I don’t need a vacation, I need a therapist.” Picking up the phone to order pizza she lay down on the couch, one knee propped up to use as a hard surface as she worked at the crossword. “Hmm, I wonder if the company covers therapy…” She mussed.
A frown came over her face as she tried to erase the last word she had written, too bad she had written it in pen. “I was never good at those anyways.” Flipping some of the pages she glanced at some of her previously circled articles. They were ads for apartments. After her mom had received a successful operation she’d become a big penny pincher, her apartment was no exception, besides she didn’t need all the space. That’s what she had been trying to convince herself at least. What she needed was to help her mom pay off the hefty hospital bills
That was her life for the past week and a half that she had already been on ‘vacation’. She was happily, or at least comfortably, settled into a routine now. She would get up, shower, have a glass of whatever was left in the fridge, skip breakfast and order lunch. After that she would leave the house to go see her mom who was still being held at the hospital, routine procedure.
She kept trying to convince herself that the reason she didn’t go out much was because she didn’t want to miss a call if the hospital called or if Willow did, not because she was busy trying to avoid people, a person. He hadn’t tried to contact her again after she assumed Anya had given him the message to not send anymore flowers. Even though she had been sure that the knowledge that he had given up would make her relieved she couldn’t help the little bundle of nerves somewhere within her that wasn’t so glad at the loss.
There was a knock on the door and she got up to answer it, the pizza had arrived half an hour ago and was half gone, she had no idea who was on the other side of the door, but it came as no great shock to see that it was Willow. An obvious look of worry on her pale face. “Buffy I think we need to talk.”
She didn’t need to look in the mirror to see that there was a confused look on her face. Stepping aside she silently invited her friend inside watching as the red head walked into her kitchen, opening the fridge and scanning it. The next thing she did was walk into the living room and sit down frowning.
“What’s wrong Willow?” She said sitting down on the couch beside her.
“This!” She gestured to the half gone pizza.
Buffy blinked and looked at her cheese pizza. “Um, I don’t like mushrooms?”
Willow just crossed her arms, her frown deepening. “You’re supposed to be on vacation Buffy! Not sitting at home with an empty fridge, eating pizza, and..and..” She picked up the paper before Buffy could snatch it back. “…looking for a new apartment!” Buffy waited for Willow to finally get hit by the information she had just found out.
“Wait, looking for a new apartment?”
Buffy shrugged. “Have to pay the hospital bills somehow.”
Willows look turned sympathetic. “Oh Buffy. You need to stop worrying. It’s going to be fine and I’m sure the bills will get paid. You don’t need to pay them off all at once.”
“So what brought you here anyways?” She said, strategically avoiding the topic.
“I’m stealing you tonight.”
Buffy quirked a brow. “What do you mean by ‘stealing’ me?”
Willow shrugged, now slightly smiling. “Anya decided to have a small get together. Oz and I are going, Xander’s obviously going to be there too and you were invited. She just asked me to pass it on. ”
“No thanks. I’m fine staying right here.”
Willow crossed her arms. “What part of ‘stealing’, do you not understand? Don’t exactly have a choice here.”
Buffy sighed. This was going to be a long night.
***
Buffy stared at the happy couples spread out around her in the living room. Anya was sitting on Xander’s lap in a leather reclining armchair, as she talked animatedly with everyone. Willow meanwhile, was leaning on Oz as they sat on the far end of the couch from her. The evening seemed to be going ok so far, she was enjoying some time with her friends, but even though she knew they loved her there was an empty feeling inside of her. She tried to shake it off, smiling and laughing at what the others were saying and occasionally joining into the conversation.
Currently Anya was talking about how she was going to be decorating the house, her and Xander had just moved in two weeks ago. “..and I was thinking of leaving one of the smaller rooms for the baby.” Everyone watched as Xander nearly chocked on his drink as Anya calmly swatted him on the back. “That is when Xander decides he’s finally ready.” She smiled widely. “But in the mean time we can have lots and lots of great or..”
To everyone’s relief just as she was about the finish the sentence the doorbell rang. “Oh, that must be our almost no show.”
Buffy looked to Willow curiously. “Someone else was invited?”
Willow just shrugged.
Anya came back into the living room ecstatic. “Anyone want a re-fill?”
One look up from her almost empty, although small, glass of wine had Buffy asking for a re-fill within seconds. A short distance away from her William, Spike was standing beside Anya, looking at her intensely, a look of surprise on his face. Yup she had been right, this was going to be a long night.
“Spike why don’t you go sit down while I go get the drinks.” Anya suggested gesturing in Buffy’s direction.
Buffy was just about to glare at Anya when she realized that she was only pointing in direction because she was by the only available seat in the room. The empty space on the couch beside her.
Quickly jumping up she rushed after Anya. “ I’ll help you with the drinks!” She didn’t meet Spike’s eyes when she passed him. But the accidental way her shoulder brushed his arm made shivers ripple down her spine.
When she reached the kitchen that was just around the corner she glared at Anya. “Who the hell gave you the right to try and meddle in my personal life Anya?”
The other woman turned around with raised eyebrows. “You know Buffy, not everything is about you. I invited Spike because he’s my friend too. Now help me with the drinks.”
Staring helplessly at the glasses on the counter she picked two up and started to walk back, suddenly nervous. Maybe she could convince all of them that she had to leave early.
“ Here’s your drink Willow.” She looked hopelessly at the seating situation and finally placed herself on the couch besides Spike, as close to the armrest as she possibly could.
“How’ve you’ve you been?”
She turned giving him an awkward smile, the churning feeling in her stomach not subsiding. “Better, moms out of the hospital.”
“That’s good.” His head tilted to the side, he was finding it hard not to just tell her how he felt. That the whole situation was just bloody ridiculous and that they should be together.
The room was uncharacteristically silent. Each occupant feeling the tension and wondering what was going to happen.
“Jeez, can someone just say something already, just because there’s some obvious tension going on between blonde and blonder over here doesn’t mean you can ruin my party!”
Everyone stared slack jawed at Anya. “I have to get some fresh air.”
“An, look what you did, now Buffy’s upset.” Xander frowned lightly at his girlfriend. She just shrugged, grinning like the cat who ate the canary when Spike stood up, started to open his mouth to speak and then gave up. There were no excuses that they would believe anyway.
“Ah, sod it.”
***
Buffy stood out on the back porch and took in a deep breath. This was embarrassing, the facts were that no matter what she did, hide, run away, avoid it, try to cover it, she was still in love with him. Maybe, maybe if she gave them another chance…
“Buffy we have to talk.”
“Spike..”
He cut her off abruptly, an intense look marring his face. His deep blue eyes making her shiver in anticipation. “No, that’s wrong. I need to talk. You just listen.” He walked forward gripping her arms firmly with his hands. Part of him did it just because he hadn’t been able to touch her in so long, while another part was doing it to make sure she didn’t run.
“I love you.”
“Spike..”
“Shut up. You’ve done too much talking and look where it’s gotten us. Miserable, that’s where.” He ground out, the frustration evident by the frown on look of concentration plainly written on his face. He continued. “I love you. I sodding have since that first day in the office. The way you brow crinkles when you frown, you beautiful eyes, your sexy body. Everything. I’ve made mistakes, and I’m sorry, you know that. But that doesn’t mean it’s reason enough to throw all of this away.”
“I..”
“Wait one bloody minute. I know that if we just try this and we give it a…”
He was silenced as her arms surrounded his neck, pulling him down to her mouth, and it felt like the part of her that had been discontent for the longest time was suddenly quieting. Silenced by the passion as his lips caressed hers, tongues mingling with equal fervor. She had made her decision.
“William, I was trying to say that I want to be with you.” She placed another soft kiss on his lips then looked away almost shyly. “I don’t want to imagine waking up for the reset of my life knowing that your not there and that you could have been.” She looked up searching his eyes and smiled at the awe in them.
He pulled her farther into his embrace. “God I love you.”
She smiled against his chest. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Thank god, it’s about damn time!” The couple looked at the ashamed faces, all knowing that they had been caught. All except Anya, who looked onto the scene with satisfaction making the two blondes laugh.
____________________________________
A/n: Ok so that was the last chapter of this (supposed to be) fluffy story. I'm sorry it took so long, especially to all of you faithful readers who kept track of it, but what can I say, life got in te way. I'll still be posting but it depends on my schedule. I'm also re-designing my site and updates will be on there if I start something new, etc. That should happen sometime soon. Hope you liked the fic. :) -Anna