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Again thanks to my wonderful beta's. I love you guys. And everyone, thank you OS much for reviewing. It's great to see you guys enjoying it.
Chapter 16: Curiosity


“I think I’m ready Tara.” Buffy said softly, feeling slightly nervous.

“Ready for what exactly?” Tara asked.

Buffy gave her a pointed look, to say ‘don’t play dumb with me’ but realised it was just a way to goad her into saying it out loud. It was so safe to keep it vague, and talk around it, instead of getting straight to the point.

“I’m ready to take the next step in my relationship.”

She saw Tara looking at her with a raised eyebrow.

“You mean, you think you are ready to be physical with Spike? Tara asked her gently.

Buffy blushed as she remembered the night she’d spent at Spike’s apartment and nodded her head.

“Buffy, only you can decide if you’re ready or not. From what you’ve told me, Spike has never forced you into anything. Don’t feel obligated to do something because you’ve been seeing each other for a few weeks.”

Buffy looked at Tara with thoughtful eyes. She didn’t feel pushed in any way, it’s something she wanted herself.

“I would like to talk to you about something else.” Tara said to get away from the current subject knowing she’d ask more about it later, which made Buffy look up at her with a questioning gaze.

“I would like to talk about your father.” Tara said gently.

The moment Tara said it, Buffy’s back went rigid. She’d hardly known her father at all, what was there to talk about? He’d left her mom with the weight of raising a child of her own. He wasn’t worth spending words on.

“Buffy, it’s ok to feel sadness or anger towards him. He may not have been in your life much, but a father is an important part of a girl’s life, and you never experienced anything but desertion from your father.”

“He’s not worth talking about. He left my mom to raise me on her own, not even giving her child support. He’s a useless bastard.” Buffy said without any emotion in her voice.

Tara nodded her head.

“But I do think this has had an important impact on you, and would be the main reason why you don’t trust the men in your life. Think back on the way you reacted towards Xander when he told you what he thought of your relationship. You were furious and reacted quickly.” Tara said, and seeing the look on her face quickly continued. “I’m not saying what he did was right Buffy. Xander had no right to judge you, it’s none of his business.”

Buffy took a big breath. She’d never really thought her father would be the reason why she didn’t trust men easily. But it all made sense to her.

“I’m sorry Tara. It’s just that when I think of my father I can only think of how he left my mom and me, and never looked back. I think I would like to talk about him some more if that’s ok?” Buffy said with a slightly quivering voice.

“Of course Buffy. But we won’t talk about him anymore this session. I do want to come back to our subject about Spike though.”

Tara saw Buffy’s cheeks flush a little and had to smile to herself. Something obviously must have already happened. Buffy wasn’t the girl to just jump in bed with someone.

“I have a feeling there’s more to it than you’re telling me. But that’s ok, and you don’t have to tell me. All I can say, Buffy, is that only you can feel if you’re ready for the next step. So maybe it’s a good idea if you invite him to your own home, so you’re on familiar grounds.”

Buffy looked completely flushed now.

“You must think I’m a loser.” She whispered softly.

“What? Buffy no, I admire you for who you are, and that you haven’t given yourself to just anybody. And trust me, men are lucky to have you. And I know for certain that Spike feels exactly the same way.”

“Now you can tell me all the juicy details during your next appointment.” Tara winked at her.


XXXXX


It was the first day of her new job. Her job at ‘Little London’ to be exact. Spike had told her to come over at 9 so they could start going over the details of the business. She was actually a little nervous about it. She knew Spike wasn’t going to be there a lot once she was completely settled with the job, but in the beginning he was going to be around quite a bit.

After her session with Tara a few days before, she’d been thinking a lot about her decision to want to take the relationship a step further. She was scared of course, but her curiosity was getting stronger by the minute. She wanted to know what it was like to be touched, and to touch someone else. She wanted to embrace that feminine power she could have over Spike.

Yeah, she was nervous about going to work alright. But she had to go, and now she was standing in front of her front door with a beating heart, gathering the courage to get on with it and see ‘her’ man about her job. Taking a deep breath she reached out, opened the door and walked through, over to her car.

Fifteen minutes later she got out of her car and walked over to the back entrance of the pub. Nervously readjusting her coat she opened the door and walked into the pub towards the stairs to go to her new office.

Spike was busy sorting out some papers when she walked in.

“Hi” she said softly to get his attention.

He looked up from his work and gave her a brilliant smile.

“Hi luv, come on in, this is your office now” he said with a wink.

Buffy giggled quietly and put her coat on a vacant chair as she walked further into the room.

“So, where do we start?” she asked walking over to the desk.

“Well, I think it’s best we start with the administrative work, and then go over the planning of work schedules for the staff and lastly we’ll go over the payments.” He said while looking at the desk and the task before him.

“But first, I think it’s time for a good morning kiss.” He said smirking while pulling her down onto his lap which made Buffy giggle.

Pressing her mouth against his in a soft kiss, she let her lips trail over his, nipping at his soft lips before opening her mouth to deepen the kiss. The kissed for a few moments when they pulled back, panting for air.

“Wow, that was one hell of a good morning kiss.” Buffy breathed.

“That it was luv,” pressing another kiss to her mouth.

“Maybe we should get started though” she said getting off of his lap. It felt too good to be in his arms, but she knew if she would stay there she wouldn’t be able to concentrate on her work. And it would already be hard enough as it was.

“Ok luv, grab another chair and we’ll go through all the papers.” He said with a sigh.

--

Hours later they’d gone through all the paperwork of the pub and Buffy knew exactly how the place was run, and what she had to do to keep it that way.

Buffy was growing nervous when the work was done.

“Spike?” she asked softly.

“Yeah pet?”

“Do you maybe want to come over to my house tomorrow night?” she asked, her nervousness showing in her voice.

Spike looked up at her, slightly surprised by her request.

“I would love to Buffy.”

“Cool” she said with a smile, glad that he accepted.

She saw Spike getting up, ready to leave the office, leaving her to work.

“Will I see you before I go home?” she asked.

“Count on it, pet” he replied giving her a wink, and walking out of ‘her’ office.

Buffy sat back with a smile on her face. She already loved her new job, and the tasks she had to do. And she’d dared to ask Spike to come over to her house. She felt great and it showed by the smile on her face.

=====

First day for her huh, and she invited him over? What will that be you ask? Well, you'll have to wait and see!! ;-) Did you guys like it?





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