Author's Chapter Notes:
Thanks to everyone for reviewing. I guess i made people think about last chapter because of the feedback. I'm not sure when i'll be able to update soon, my sister is comingf over for a long weekend, so no time to write or come online. will try to update soon though, and reviews might pursuade me ;-)

Thanks to my wonderful beta's married_n_mich and Jessica for reviewing!

Chapter 8: Things to talk about


Spike walked up and down the hallway of the Summers’ home. When Giles had gotten off the phone with Mrs. Summers, it became clear what was bothering Buffy. Knowing that he had to tell Buffy the truth, he’d arranged with Mrs. Summers for a ‘surprise’ meeting at her home.

He heard a car pull up on the driveway and knew it was Buffy. He went into the sitting room and sat down on the couch. The front door opened and closed.

“Mom?” Buffy called from the doorway. Walking into the living room, she froze when she saw Spike. “What are you doing here” she demanded.

“Hello, Buffy,” Spike said with a soft smile.

“What do you want, Spike” Buffy asked in a cold tone, but she could hear her voice slightly quiver, and she was sure Spike could hear it too.

“I think we need to talk, luv. About us and what’s been bothering you. You closed the door in my face without even giving me an explanation of what was going on. I had to go through quite a few people to find out what the hell was going on.”

Spike noticed the alarmed look on her face.

“Yes, Buffy. I know what you’ve been thinking. That you think I’ve been cheating on you with someone else. I just wonder, do you, or did you, ever feel threatened in any way that I would cheat on you with another woman? Have I not made it clear to you that I’m very much interested in you, and that I would let you set the pace. Believe me, Buffy. I wouldn’t have bothered with that if I wasn’t convinced you could be the one for me. When I make a commitment to someone, I take it to heart. I’ve been cheated on and I know what it’s like, so to think you would believe me capable or that…” Spike’s voice wavered as he looked her square in the face.

Buffy had tears streaming down her cheeks. “Spike, I went to see you the day you sent me the flowers. I saw you with another woman. What did you expect me to think when you were all over her?” Buffy asked softly.

Spike walked over to Buffy and grabbed her hands.

“Buffy, I need to know if this is worth it. I’ve been through a lot with my last relationship, and I’m not sure if I can go through something like that again. I believe I have strong feelings for you, the loving kind. I need to know if you feel the same way too.”

Buffy grabbed his neck and pushed her lips against his in a fierce kiss.

Spike could only grab hold of her and kiss her back just as passionately. This was a new step, for both of them. And he knew Buffy had never been in this position, but he was glad she took the jump.

Pulling away from him she buried her face in his chest. “I’m so sorry,” she said.

“Shh, luv. It’s ok. We need to work out a few bumps in the road, but we’ll make it, right?” Spike said, gently stroking her tear stained cheek.

“But first, I’d like you to meet someone.” Turning her around, Buffy was faced with the woman she’d seen Spike with in the club.

“Buffy, I’d like you to meet my sister, Drusilla.”

Buffy looked at the woman who she’d seen Spike with in his pub. The woman she thought Spike was cheating on her with. Who turns out to be his own sister? Buffy was stunned to say the least, and it was clearly written on her face.

Spike gave her a reassuring squeeze in her shoulder.

“So you’re the woman who’s stolen my brother’s heart,” Drusilla said smiling at Buffy.

Buffy blushed to this comment and looked shyly at Spike, who gave her a soft smile.

“I trust you to take good care of him. He may look like the big bad on the outside, but he wears his heart on his sleeve. And he really is a big softy on the inside” Dru teased Spike, which earned her a scowl.

Buffy felt more guilt wash over her. She’d drawn her own conclusions and had not trusted Spike. She felt miserable and just wanted to run up to her room and cry her eyes out.

Spike saw the different emotions playing on her face and drew her closer to him.

“We’ll talk some more later ok? Right now there’s some food waiting for us in the dining room.” Spike spoke softly in her ear.

Buffy looked at him with a watery smile.

Taking her hand he let her to the dining room where they all sat down for some dinner. Drusilla was happily chatting with her mom and trying to involve Buffy in the conversation. But Buffy was still lost in her thoughts and wasn’t really paying attention to what was going on around her.

When dinner was over, Joyce and Drusilla offered to clear the table and do the dishes, so Buffy and Spike could get a chance to talk.

Steering her into the living room, Spike sat down on the couch and pulled Buffy down with him.

“I guess we have to talk some more about what happened.” Spike started the conversation.

Buffy fumbled with the hem of her shirt and kept her eyes downward. She was feeling very conscious of the situation and still felt extremely guilty for not trusting Spike.

“I’m really sorry Spike, for not trusting you. It’s just that, the moment I saw you in your sister’s arms… I just didn’t know what to think.” She whispered.

Spike tried to give Buffy a comforting smile. She looked so small and fragile, with her head down like she wanted to vanish from the living room, which she probably did in this uncomfortable situation.

“Tell me what happened Buffy. What made you think I was cheating on you? Something must have caused you to think ill of me when you saw me hugging another woman.” Spike said calmly.

Buffy looked up at him and saw the love in his eyes. She wasn’t sure what had caused her to react the way she had. Apart from the fact that every time she’d been interested in a boy in high school they’d laughed in her face. It had crushed her when Angel, her high school crush had asked her to the prom and made a complete fool of her at the dance, leaving deep scars in Buffy’s heart.

Buffy took a deep breath and started talking.

“When I saw you with Drusilla, I thought you didn’t want me anymore, like any man doesn’t want me.” Buffy turned towards him. “Is there something wrong with me? Am I really that repulsive?” Buffy had tears streaming down her face again.

“Buffy pet, what ever makes you think that? If that were true, do you really think I would be with you right now?” Spike asked with a frown.

“Is just that, every man I’ve ever loved always left me…”

And there it was, the reason why she didn’t trust him, or men in general. All the bad experiences in her life had caused her to believe that men didn’t find her interesting enough to stick around.

Spike knew her father had left when she’d been a little girl, he didn’t know about her other experiences with men though which made him slightly jealous.

“Buffy, you have to listen to me carefully.” Spike started slowly. “I promise you, I’m not leaving and am certainly not letting you go. I’m here for the long run.”

Spike gave her a gentle smile and before he knew it, he had his arms full of Buffy.

Buffy buried her face in his neck and let the tears fall. When she had calmed down Spike pulled back and wiped the tears of her face.

“You’re an amazing woman, Buffy” Spike said before he lowered his head and pressed his lips to Buffy’s.

When Drusilla and Joyce walked into the living room they found Spike and Buffy kissing each other rather passionately. When Joyce cleared her throat, they quickly broke apart and Buffy looked down at her feet rather embarrassed to have her mother find her like this.

Spike smiled at Joyce and gave Buffy a quick peck on the lips before he stood up from the couch and made his way over to Drusilla.

“Thanks Joyce, for having us” Spike turned to Joyce who gave him a hug in return.

Spike turned to Buffy and gave her a wink, knowing he’d see her again tomorrow.


=====

So there we have it, what do you guys think? Feel better?





You must login (register) to review.