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Author's Chapter Notes:
Big Thank you as always to my beta Gotkona.

And also to everyone that reviewed i'm glad you're liking this story.
Buffy descended the staircase and waited for Willow as she ran around her bedroom looking for her purse.

Standing in front of the mirror, she smacked her lips together spreading the gloss. Willow skipped down the stairs her red hair fixed in place, smiling at Buffy she bounded for the door. Turning off the lights, they stepped outside into the night. Willow locked the door and linked arms with her best friend as they walked to the cab that was waiting for them.

Sitting back in the cab Buffy turned her head and watched as the houses moved quickly past. Willow’s hand squeezed hers knowing that being back was hard on her, she leaned her head on Buffy’s shoulder as they sat there in comfortable silence.

“Buffy, can I ask you a question?”

“Yeah sure.” Willow lifted her head.

“Why did you leave?” Buffy was caught off guard by the question. Her hands settled on her knee and then moved over to scratch her shoulder.

“Will, you know why I couldn’t stay here. After seeing Spike with Cordy it was the ultimate betrayal. In that moment my heart snapped. It hurt too much to stay, and then Angel came round the day after and threw a little salt into the wound. I just needed to leave.”

Buffy looked up at Willow’s shocked face, her brow furrowed in confusion as she began to breathe rapidly.

“Buffy, what did Angel say to you? Because we found out later that Angel and Cordy were seeing each other, and he was so angry about you embarrassing him in the Bronze he wanted to pay you back. Hence Cordy tried to seduce Spike to split you guys up.”

“What?” Buffy grabbed Willow’s upper arms.

“Yeah, but you were gone. I didn’t know how to contact you. You didn’t let me know for a year after you left and then Spike was already gone.”

“He left.” She released her hands from her arms and sat back further into her seat.

“What did you expect, you left? Spike was so upset he waited a year for you to come back; no one would tell him where you were. You never did, so he left.”

Why would she think he would stay? After all she did leave, and she regretted her decision every day of her life. Looking out of the window her mood suddenly dampened, eyes glistening with tears.

***Flashback****

Buffy sat on the bus waiting for the bus to leave, her eyes felt tired from crying. She needed to get away. She didn’t know if she would ever be back in the town she loved so much. She couldn’t say goodbye to her friends, it would make this too real. So she took the coward’s way out and wrote them each a letter explaining her actions.

Looking out of the window she watched as her mother blew her nose, the look of distress on her mother’s face caused her to look away momentarily.

The engine of the bus revved, she suddenly felt nervous that she was leaving the love of her mother behind. Tucking her hair behind her ears, she waved bye to her mother, her silhouette blurring into the distance.

Picking up her bag she looked for the packet of tissues her mother always insisted she carry. Searching in her bag, she pulled out the photos she packed in a rush.
Staring back at her were her two best friends.

Willow and Xander’s arms were wrapped around her like she wouldn’t be able to breathe. She placed the photograph behind the pack as the one photo she thought she had left behind came into view.

Spike stood behind her, holding her in his arms, his chin resting on his shoulder. Her smile left her face slowly as the pain of what had happened at the prom.

Squeezing her eyes shut she tried to block out the pain as the tears slowly coursed down her face.

She opened her eyes briefly to see the Sunnydale sign, sighing deeply she knew she would never let anyone in again.

*****End Flashback****


The Bronze was packed. Buffy and Willow slowly made their way to the bar. Waiting to be served Buffy slowly took everything in. There were so many nights were she sat on the upper level with Spike and her friends.

“Catching up on old times?”

Willow’s hand touched her shoulder, sniffing she placed her hand above her friends.

“Yeah, good but also not so good.”

Willow didn’t know what to say. It was a lot for Buffy to take in; she hadn’t been back in town a day and it was beginning to hit her hard.

“Remember when Xander was mistaken for that guitar player, and had to go on stage.”


Buffy smiled as she moved the straw with her lips, staring into her drink she sighed. She knew that if she came back she would think of him. She had been careful to lock that part of her heart and buried it deep.

Feeling the tears prick her eyes she quickly excused herself to use the bathroom.

Her reflection stared back at her as she applied lip-gloss to her lips. Grabbing a tissue she cleaned underneath her eyes. Putting on a brave face for her friends was her main priority. Spike was now in her past never to be seen.

Sucking a deep breath she fixed a smile on her face and headed out of the bathroom.

Willow was sitting down at the bar twirling her glass against the dark wood. She smiled as Buffy re-took her seat.






Spike picked up the magazines from the coffee table, and threw them down with disgust.

Xander watched with amusement as Spike cursed and muttered under his breath. Standing up and moving towards the fireplace he reached for the pack of cigarettes and lighter.

“You know you really are getting senile. I think being a lawyer is scrambling your pea sized brain”

“Being a lawyer has nothing to do with it. It has to do with the fact that if we don’t hurry up your lady will break my balls”


Grinning as he snatched the packet out of his friend’s hand, and shoved them into his jacket pocket.

Grabbing Xander by the collar he pulled him out of door.



“Did I tell you today that I love you?”

“Nope you didn’t.”

“I love you.”

Her hand tightened around his as he leaned closer and kissed her soft lips.

Spike shook his head trying to erase the vivid moment. He was feeling the pain more now that he was in the town they grew up and fell in love. Passing familiar places seem to spark off different memories.


“Come on let’s boogie.”

Willow jumped off her chair and pulled a reluctant Buffy to the small dance floor, the disco lights dancing around her.


Spike and Xander walked in through the door, pushing them slightly so they could get to the bar.

Spike turned around and leaned on his elbows. Bright lights flashed on a couple of girls on the dance floor. He squinted and smiled when he caught sight of Willow grinning. He watched the other girl dance, her blond hair bouncing while she moved her hips to the beat, blue silk dancing along the small of back as she swayed.


Picking up the two beers Xander handed one to Spike and moved towards the dance floor. Spike followed while never taking his eyes off the girl who danced so provocatively. She lifted her hair away exposing her slender neck and shoulder.

Willow casually looked towards the bar and spotted Xander and Spike waving excitedly her eyes widened as Buffy turned her head.

The bottle of beer slipped from his gasp as the face that had been haunting him since he was eighteen was looking back at him.

Buffy was here.





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